#it's fine. there will be more chances etc.
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CREEP
18+ / mdi
summary: jungkook's in love. finally, after years of waiting for that perfect romance, he finds himself utterly infatuated with the perfect girl. too bad she has no idea who he is. but it's okay, he knows enough about you for the two of you, and he'll make sure to work his way into your life.
content: stalker!jungkook, clueless!reader, lowkey inspired by you from netflix, stalking, reader is surveilled by jk without her permission, smut, afab reader, masturbation (both m and f receiving), jk watches her have sex and masturbating, penetrative sex, creampie, finger sucking, etc.
wc: 10.2k
a/n: my first sort of dark toxic fanfic everyone say yay!!! also please do not read if these themes offend you thank youuuu
masterlist
You'd gone on another date tonight.
This was the fifth one this month.
Always a different guy. Jungkook had been keeping count.
It was hard to not let it get to him. Sure, he was aware that you didn't owe him anything, and much less did he feel as if he held any sort of ownership over you, bu the more men he beheld in your presence, the less patience he had.
Jungkook knew you to be a smart girl. You were a well put-together adult, an incredibly confident and intelligent woman who needed no protection from anyone. It was one of the many things that made him fall for you. It was just the decisions you took in regard to your love life that left Jungkook bothered.
He tried not to judge you, truly he did, but seeing you go from one idiot to another pained him. Intimately so. While aware that you needed to get all these idiots out of your system, Jungkook just wasn't sure how much longer he could hold back as he watched you with this week's respective idiotic bachelor.
This time around, it was some idiot named Liam.
To the naked eye, he might've been a good pick — which is why you'd even given him the time of day, Jungkook assumed. He was tall, — but Jungkook was taller — he was fit, — but Jungkiok fitter — he had okay money — except it was none compared to Jungkook — he had everything the average woman would look for in a man. Truly, Jungkook could not blame you for thinking this might be the right guy.
But, at the same time, you sometimes had the tendency to rush things. Or at least that was what Jungkook had noticed after the past few months of watching you.
The same had happened with Liam.
After messaging for about a week, you'd found yourself at a late night date.
It was the usual. Dinner, walk around a nearby park, and finalizing with a solicitous invitation to your apartment. That much was fine with Jungkook. He didn't care (well, he very much did). A man vying for your affections was not shocking to him. You were perfect. Jungkook was certain of it.
It was what happened behind closed doors that churned his insides out.
Maybe it had been a bad idea when Jungkook decided to install a camera in your apartment, but he couldn't help himself. It had seemed inviting at the time. You had been gone on a family vacation for a week, leaving your place completely vacant, too inviting for him to not take the chance to look around.
And look around, he did.
Out of all the time in which he'd known you, that had been the best day of all. Getting to be in an environment tailored to you and by you had been heaven.
He laid on your bed, letting himself be engulfed by the scent of your shampoo on your pillow. He'd chuckled at all the adorable plushies scattered throughout your place. He'd installed his cameras, ensuring the ability to supervise in case the occasion were to come up.
But his most favorite had been the souvenirs he'd taken with him. The pretty lace set he'd taken as a memento to ensure he had a little piece of you with him at all times.
Currently, as he went over today's events whilst in bed, that pretty set sat on his pillow — on the side of the bed he decided would be yours as soon as he made you his ...
Going back to more pressing matters. That idiot, Liam.
God, even thinking about how the night had ended made him angry. How did you pick these guys? Well, Jungkook knew the how (usually some shitty dating app), but he just couldn't understand the why.
Your dinner had been subpar at best. Liam had picked the shittiest 'fancy' restaurant available. He had ordered for you (whilst picking the cheapest options available), hadn't even bothered to buy you quality wine, and took a ten-minute bathroom break halfway through dinner — which he had spent on some stupid phone call to a buddy of his. Talk about priorities.
Going back home, he parked too far from your apartment for some stupid reason or other, choosing to walk you under a thinly-veiled pretense to make sure you arrived home safely. Instead, he went home with you despite not deserving such privilege.
This time around, Jungkook could tell that you weren't too enthusiastic to allow him in, but it seemed ritualistic to you by now. He argued that maybe you wanted at least one thing to come out of the date, even if that was just some meaningless sex.
Except that the sex had been even worse than anything that came prior.
At first, Jungkook felt morally ambiguous as he watched the live feed of the camera he'd installed in your apartment, but considering that he had already followed you to your date (under disguise, of course), this wasn't all that bad.
The foreplay had been nonexistent (his first mistake, Jungkook was very well aware), leaving you dissatisfied before it all even began. Barely wet and not stimulated at all, you laid there, letting that undeserving idiot do a novice's job at fingering you. Jungkook caught onto the winces on your face as the dumbass worked you with zero finesse. It was a complete disaster that left you just as dry as you'd been since walking through the door.
The worst part of all had been the actual sex itself. Jungkook was genuinely appalled at Liam's ability to get gradually worse as the night progressed.
For starters, you didn't cum. Jungkook would've been able to spot a fake orgasm from you from miles away. You gave a great performance, he had to admit. Had he been any other idiot (re: Liam), he might've believed you. But he knew all your tells. Despite how pretty you looked, how ruinous you sounded, he knew that you'd fabricated that scene to get Liam to stop trying to make you cum to no avail.
Liam, though, had the night of his life. Of this, Jungkook was sure. He needed no confirmation for it, but he received it in the form of many incoming messages you got the following morning. After kicking Liam out the previous night, — under the premise that you had work early the next morning (because you were far too nice to tell him to get fucked) — you awoke to messages from the idiot wondering when part two would come.
Jungkook scoffed at the messages, itching to respond but knowing that if he did, he'd give away that he'd hacked into your accounts. However, he was happy to see that you'd let him down, using one excuse or another as to why you shouldn't go on a second date.
This was the usual routine you followed.
Or at least in the past three months in which Jungkook had been watching you. But now things would be different.
Because Jungkook had finally had enough.
It was time for you to meet the love of your life.
Jungkook's decision to finally make his way into your life was inspired by a message exchange you'd had with your friend slightly prior to your escapade with that idiot.
You'd been frustrated, unwilling to continue with this stupid back and forth with guys who did not deserve you (your words, though Jungkook fully agreed). This was your last attempt, you'd sworn. You'd give up on dating sites from then on, thus giving up on dating in general, because, according to you, the current state of dating did not exist in real life. Romance was dead, you'd claimed, disheartened by how many failed talking stages you'd been through and by the amount of men disinterested in more than simple one-night stands.
So, Jungkook swore something to himself.
He swore that he'd be the man to change your mind. He'd let you exhaust yourself with worthless men and come swoop you off your feet.
For months, he'd prepared for this. Everything about you, he knew. If there was any man perfect for you, it was him.
He liked to think that he was your type already — tall, handsome, smart, financially intelligent, romantic. He had everything you wanted in a man. All he had to do now was swoop into your life and make his interest be known.
But there was a problem.
As much as Jungkook liked you, — and as much as he believed you'd like him back — he was scared. Among all his attributes was a shyness that appeared to only show up when it concerned you. There'd been various instances in which he'd been itching to meet you, to cut his research short and kneel before you, begging you to give him a chance. But this had proved impossible to him. It was one of the reasons as to why he hadn't just grown the balls to speak to you in the first place.
Under his logic, it was better to study you from afar. To learn everything about who he was sure would become the love of his life. Everything about you was perfect to him from the moment he saw you. He could not risk letting you get away; disappointing you by not being the man you needed.
So he watched you from afar. He learned what to do, what not to do.
By now, he knew everything he needed to know. He knew in which ways to impress you, in which ways to ensure he wouldn't drive you away. It was just his constant anxieties about meeting you that prevented him from approaching you sooner.
Though, technically, you'd already met.
It had been brief. He was sure you didn't even remember it. Yet it was a life-changing moment for him.
It had been his turn to do a coffee run at the firm he worked at. Despite holding an important position within the company, his department had been looking for a replacement assistant for a while, leaving the more menial tasks up to the higher ups (re: Jungkook and a few others).
Upon arriving at the nearest coffee shop, there you were.
Jungkook remembered every detail about you on that day. Your hair had been done the way you usually did it, but your lipstick had been a particular shade of red he'd been itching to see you wear again.
Speaking to you had been a feat. His eyes remained on the counter the whole time, stumbling over his words a bit when you'd cracked some joke that you'd likely practiced for new customers. Jungkook wasn't usually like this. Your beauty had just caught him completely off-guard, leaving him looking like a gaping idiot.
You were beautiful, charming, and overall just a goddess in Jungkook's eyes.
It had been on that day that he'd decided that his life would now revolve around getting you to be his.
Jungkook had a tendency to get everything he wanted anyways. Wealth just happened to do that to a person.
~
The day that he'd meticulously planned for months had arrived.
Jungkook had practically jumped out of his seat when Jimin stepped out of his office to inquire as to who would be getting their usual drinks this time around. He tried not to be obvious about it, but he couldn't let this day go to waste. He'd even done his hair in a way he knew you liked (at least based on your prior dating history), donning a suit that perfectly showed off his body line, accentuating his muscles while also letting the dip of his waist show.
He felt frivolous, but the mere thought of you enjoying his appearance made him appreciate himself all the better.
Stepping out, there was a pep in his step. The knowledge that he'd finally — officially — meet the girl of his dreams had him over the moon. Taehyung had even eyed him weirdly when he noticed his uncharacteristic enthusiasm on a random Tuesday morning. Jungkook simply brushed him off. Nothing was going to derail him today.
Today would be the start of the rest of his life. Nothing had mattered as much as this moment.
As he stood in front of your place of work, he hesitated a bit.
The glass doors gave him a perfect view of you working behind the coffee bar. He stayed there, watching you from afar, for a few moments. Not minding the buzzling in and out of the coffee shop, he remained there, attempting to psych himself up to finally make a move.
Would you remember him?
No, of course not. Why would you?
Your one and only meeting had been three months ago. It had been such a fleeting moment, yet it had left such a long-standing effect on him. Jungkook hoped maybe that had been mutual, but according to your messaging history, that was not the case.
Shaking his head of any irrelevant thoughts, he finally stepped forward, hand landing on the door to push it open. And then, there you were.
You weren't paying attention to him as he stepped towards the counter. No, you were wiping the table — always doing something, always working. Jungkook knew this about you. You had a habit to keep yourself busy at all times. You liked feeling useful. He really liked this about you.
When he finally settled his feet right across from you, you looked up with a slight jump. Jungkook even noticed you do a quick double-take at his appearance.
"Oh, uh hi! Welcome. What can I get for you today?", you cleared your throat with a smile.
"Morning," he smiled back, sheepish, "Sorry, it's a bit of a big order. I'm on coffee run duty today," he said as he handed you the slip of paper containing his floor's orders of choice.
"Oh, yeah for sure," you grabbed the note, incidentally brushing your fingers.
Jungkook had to do a double take himself when he noticed a slight blush on your cheeks at the contact. He couldn't let his confidence falter, but the internal satisfaction at even the slightest reciprocation already had him beaming.
Was it really working? He hadn't even done anything yet. Maybe catering his looks to your liking really did have its intended effect.
You excused yourself from the counter and walked over to the side to begin preparing the drinks. Jungkook, being as determined as he was, trailed along, not minding the glass above the counter separating customers from baristas. Dumbly, he watched as you made the drinks, occasionally catching your eye and chuckling when you'd giggle.
"Is coffee making that interesting to you?", you chuckled, head tilting in curiosity but not once stopping your work.
"The sight is fascinating for sure," he hummed.
You faltered a bit after that, grip on the cup needing readjustment due to his unexpected flirting. Jungkook, on the contrary, maintained his posture. His eyes remained on yours and a small smile graced his lips.
"Okay, damn," you murmured under your breath. You tried to suppress a flustered smile, but Jungkook still caught it.
"Too forward? I thought maybe it was too subtle," he chuckled.
You set aside one of the drinks, moving onto the next one. If Jungkook didn't know any better, he might've thought you were taking your time.
"Do you do this to all service workers or am I just special?"
"Maybe you're just special," he began, "I can't lie, you might've caught my eye last time I was here," he admitted.
Half-truths were okay.
"Oh? I don't remember you. Remind me?"
Your tone had turned higher, maybe even flirtatious. Luck was on Jungkook's side today.
He'd known you to like guys who were a little forward — or at least that's what you'd texted your best friend after another failed date with a guy who couldn't mumble his way out of a single compliment. Apart from attempting to physically embody your type, he'd also decided to act in every way he knew you'd be extra responsive to.
Luckily for Jungkook, it appeared as if your type was pretty much just him.
"Hmm," he pretended to ponder over it, "Too little time. Maybe I could stop by after your shift and remind you then. It was a life-changing experience, I have lots to say."
A truth hidden behind a joke. He was doing good at this.
Another giggle left your lips, almost dropping the pen you were currently using to write the names of each recipient of the drinks.
"Your suit looks more expensive than my monthly wages. Are you sure you wanna spend your time waiting for a lowly barista, Mr. CEO?"
If only you knew just how much time he was willing to invest in you. How much he'd already invested.
"Not a CEO. And I'd be willing to stand here for hours if that's what it takes."
"Okay, damn. You're serious, huh?", you laughed, "I'm off in three hours. But I'll look a mess by then. If you really want to tell me how I changed your life, here's my number," your hand crossed the threshold of the small divide between the counter and the bar, grabbing onto his own and scribbling your number on the back of his hand.
"I hope you know I'll be making liberal use of this," he warned lightheartedly.
"Don't threaten me with a good time," you grinned one last time before handing him a cup holder with all his drinks.
Jungkook had to force himself and be cool as he exited out of the establishment, attempting to conceal the huge smile on his lips at his success.
Things had gone way smoother than he'd ever fantasized. The nerves he was sure would surge as soon as he saw you simply never made an appearance. He'd been able to wow you, to make you laugh. Fuck, your shy giggle at his dumb flirting would likely replay in his brain for the rest of the day.
There was a brand new pep in his step as he made his way back. It had taken herculean self-control to not look back and check if you were looking back at him as he left. He needed to play it cool. You liked guys who were down, horribly bad for you, but that would come later. For now, he needed to preserve an image of coolness.
Jungkook made his way back to his building, multiple cups in hand aided by the cup holder. He'd made sure his hand remained untouched, unwilling to risk losing your number (despite the fact he already had it — and way more than just your number).
It was the cutest thing to him, seeing you scribble your number on his hand as your hand held his firm for the pressure of the pen. The shadow of your touch remained on him, something which he would preserve in his mind until the moment he got to feel your touch again.
Jungkook's thoughts were interrupted by a sudden voice. Though not too sudden, as he was now surrounded by people, not having realized he'd arrived as he was deep in his thoughts.
"You look very happy."
Turning to his side, he found Taehyung standing there, hands on hips before he walked over to Jungkook and took his coffee from the beverage holder he had at hand. He had that same look on his face he always had when he was teasing him. Jungkook felt slightly embarrassed at how obvious his feelings showed through his face.
The smile on his lips simply couldn't be helped.
"Oh, I-"
"You have that dopey smile on your face. I haven't seen that in a while," Tae noted, "Who is she?"
Jungkook did a combination of a choked breath and a scoff, resulting in a very unpleasant sound. Clearing his throat to properly respond, he took a sip from his own coffee, setting down the rest on a table nearby so they could be up for grabs.
"What makes you think it's a girl?", he attempted to evade.
"C'mon, man. Humor me," Tae nudged.
Jungkook sighed, knowing that Tae would probably not let this go. Jungkook was known as a man adverse to the dating scene, constantly pushed and pulled in every direction possible to get him to give dating a chance. What no one had known was that his heart was waiting for the perfect girl, which he'd been lucky to have found a few months back and had locked his mind and heart on.
Since things with you were pretty much settled now, Jungkook supposed that mentioning his upcoming date (the one he'd ensure to schedule with you as soon as humanly possible) wasn't too out of the question. He was too giddy to keep it in.
"Uhm, I might've asked a girl for her number."
And it was like those words sounded an alarm at the office.
Suddenly Jimin was standing next to Taehyung, with Hobi stopping on his tracks to join in on the conversation, all with their ears practically perked up in Jungkook's direction.
"You what?!"
"A girl? Since when? Who?"
"Fucking finally. I ran out of girls to set you up with."
All congratulatory and accusatory messages were delivered all at once, making Jungkook roll his eyes at the collective.
He was known as a hopeless romantic, which was known to make him incredibly picky — or anal, as Taehyung could say — about who he dated. So, yeah, maybe the fact that he'd asked a girl for her number was a big deal. But Jungkook didn't want his friends meddling with it or asking too many questions before things even started.
Especially when Jungkook couldn't really let anyone in on how he'd met you or how he'd ended up in this situation in the first place. Not even his friends could become privy to the liberal freedoms he'd taken to get to know you and ensure he'd get a chance at being with you.
His master plan was a secret he'd take to the grave.
"Just a girl. It's not a for sure thing yet. Don't wanna jinx it," is what he settled with to avoid any specifics.
"C'mon. Nothing else? It's been years, man. Give us something more," Hobi goaded.
Jungkook couldn't help the slight smile that threatened to break through at the thought of you. At the thought of what was to come.
"I'll keep you guys updated after I actually ask her out."
He received some 'boo's for that, but the shrugged them off with a lighthearted eye-roll, taking his coffee and walking over to his office after a few more minutes of teasing from his friends. They'd pointed out the phone number on his hand, awing and cooing at him in jest before he took his leave. His friends left his mind as soon as he stepped into his office, uncharacteristically putting work aside so he could put his mind on more important things — you.
Pulling out his phone, well, his burner, he decided to course through your social medias just out of sheer curiosity. Had you said anything about him? Maybe texted a friend? It'd only been a few minutes, but he knew you were usually due for a break soon and the curiosity was killing him. He needed to know what your first impression of him.
He checked your twitter, your private twitter account, even your instagram, and nothing. Which was to be expected. You weren't really the type to post your every move. But still, Jungkook was hopeful that maybe he'd invaded your mind in the same way you did his.
And then he suddenly got a notification. It was a text message from your friend, instigating him into opening your messaging app.
Upon opening it, he found an ongoing conversation, leading him to scroll up a bit to see how it'd started.
you - omfg i met the cutest guy just now you - he asked for my number im going insane you - he smelled so fucking good fuckjhdgfhskd
bestie - wait bestie - what ??? bestie - WHO bestie - PICS
you - i dont have pics u freak you - we barely just met. he's hot as fuck though !!!! you - im in over my head he's perfect
bestie - so whats the plan !!!! bestie - are yall meeting or what ?? bestie - r u fucking him bestie - i thought u were over dating bc of last time ...
you - dont bring that demon up !!! you - we didnt make plans. i just gave him my number but he kept flirting so im hoping for a call soon you - (or else ill go looking for him hes too fine to let go) you - ill make an exception for him he's just my type
Jungkook was practically kicking his feet like a teenage girl in love at every single message.
It was odd watching the conversation play out in real time, but he couldn't be too bothered about that. Not when he was so enamored with the way you spoke about him.
You wanted him!!! You wanted to fuck him!!! — a thought that made him both blush and his skin heat up. You were interested and willing to give dating a chance just to get to know him.
He was beyond fucked. But in a good way.
The excitement brought goosebumps to his skin and the itch to contact you immediately and confess his addiction to you grew more by the second.
But he had to play it cool.
He exited out of the conversation after that, wanting to give you some privacy to gush over him with your friend (it was really the least he could do).
However, the itch to message you persisted, which is exactly what he did next.
He went through many reiterations of what to send, thinking back to prior conversations you'd had with previous partners and the subsequent conversations you'd had with your friends about said partners. If Jungkook was anything, he was an expert on you. If he had to take on another PhD, his thesis would undoubtedly be about you.
In the end, he decided on being true to himself while also following the self-given advice he'd gathered through the months of knowing you.
Jungkook - let me take you out. Jungkook - this is jungkook btw Jungkook - (the love of ur life in case that wasnt clear)
Okay, sure, he wasn't as suave as the average person would expect. However, he was very well aware of what your type was. You liked to be chased, to have a guy on his knees begging for a chance — but not in a creepy way. Those had been your exact words the multiple times in which you'd vented to your friends both via text and facetime.
To your luck, Jungkook was exactly that. He had already gone way more out of his way than the average person did (or should) just to get one chance to get you to consider him as a suitor. Being down bad, or perhaps even a loser, was not a feat for him.
Your response came after a few minutes, with an excited acceptance to his offer (thank god) and a plan ultimately set up for the upcoming weekend. Jungkook could barely continue his work day after such news, too giddy to concentrate and wanting to huddle under a blanket and kick at his feet like a teenage girl.
The rest of the day was spent with thoughts of you, pushing his work aside while he mentally prepared yet another gameplan for what was to come. He needed to think of a date, arrange it, maybe even plan for what would come after it — because there would be another. He'd ensure it.
It was a few days away, yet Jungkook continued to think about it up until that very day, thankful he no longer had to wait and watch back as you dated dumbass after dumbass. Jungkook had already forgotten about every undeserving idiot he had witnessed come before him, knowing himself to be on a whole entire level to them.
As the days towards the date passed, Jungkook continued casually texting you, making good on his promise to make liberal use of your phone number (despite having already made good use of all your other information without your knowledge). He shared reels with you, tiktoks, messaged you jokes, 'good mornings,' flirtatious back and forths, anything that could get the two of you talking in the meantime. Jungkook wanted to share his genuine personality with you, hopeful that you'd like him as he was and that your personalities were as compatible as he'd predicted.
And he'd been correct. Your conversations never halted abruptly, flowing through the days and never having awkward lulls in between. It felt like talking to an old friend, except that this time around it was who he believed would become his soulmate.
Despite wanting to give you more privacy now that he had actually met you formally, Jungkook still occasionally fell for the temptation of checking your messages through his burner phone. He'd made a deal with himself that he'd stop, that he'd do things right and not mar things between you by reading your private conversations or spying on you as he did before. But sometimes it was hard. Especially when he needed to ensure things went well enough for him to be able to ask you to be official.
And so he checked, and was very pleased by what he found.
Your words about him towards your friends were blush-worthy, to say the least. You'd shower him with compliments, with some being PG while others leaning towards more R rated territory. He'd blush and flush and go crazy at those comments, itching to get you alone and show you even more things to gush about to your friends.
But for now, he prepared for your date. He'd have time to rock your world later, all in due time. His cards needed to be played right, and he was more than prepared to win this game.
Unsurprisingly to Jungkook, the date went amazing.
From the moment he picked you up, to the moment he offered to walk you from his car to your door, everything went better than he'd fantasized night after night.
He'd picked an expensive restaurant, offering to take up the entire bill (as any gentleman should, but he knew you weren't used to such treatment) and even brought you what he knew to be your favorite flowers. He picked you up, of course, earning the reward of seeing you walk out of your apartment with the most life-ruining dress he'd ever seen. A few stammered compliments were given, leading to the price that were your shy giggles in return.
At the actual date, everything ran smoothly. Jungkook's knowledge of you proved useful to wow you, but truly, he didn't need to pretend or lie to you at any moment in order to impress you. He was himself, and that was something you seemed to adore (but not as much as he already adored you). Every joke was met with a giggle, and every train of thought was reciprocated and entertained by you. You'd even played footsie with him at some point, sharing the teasing physical contact with him in return to his occasional flirtation.
When it came time to leave, he drove you back home, parking a little further away under some lame pretense just so he could spend a little extra time with you to walk you home. You caught on to this, but to Jungkook's joy, you entertained his idea, not wanting the night to end just yet either.
Once at your door, Jungkook felt conflicted.
Preferably, this would be the moment in which he finally shared his first kiss with you, a moment he'd imagined too many times to be able to admit. Yet, he found himself hesitating.
As far as he'd known you, you'd disapproved of moving too fast in relationships. It just wasn't you, you'd say. The only occasions in which you allowed for things to move forward within short periods of time were for one-night stands or when you already knew there would be no further dates.
Jungkook, however, wished to not be lumped into neither one of those categories.
So he stood there, smiling at you, holding onto your hand and unwilling to let go as his thumb graced your knuckles in a soft manner. It was silent, but it wasn't awkward. The best way to describe it was enamored — and to Jungkook's delight, it seemed to be a mutual sentiment!
But then you threw him off completely.
Not bothering to warn him, you stepped forward, putting your hands on his jaw and pulling him in as you stood on your tippy toes to reach him.
He had no time to react, eyes widening and mouth opening as you connected your lips to his. It took him a second to respond, with his arms still limp and awkward between you before he stepped into action. If you wanted a kiss, he'd deliver the best one of your life.
Taking control of the situation was easy. The shock of his long-time wish finally coming true only had him in dreamland for a few seconds before he finally snapped and reciprocated. He began to lead you, lips overpowering yours and tongue slipping out of his mouth and into your own.
He couldn't let himself think about the kiss too deeply. It was already torturous, hearing your sighs muffled by his lips and swallowing every tiny sound you made at the aggressive way in which he'd begun to kiss you. He had all the power, and much to his mental dismay, you seemed to really enjoy it.
But he needed to control himself. He couldn't let this move too fast. Couldn't let himself give in to desire and have his long-awaited day with you. Even if his body was itching for him to get on his knees and beg for a chance between them, he had to hold himself back.
However, this did not prevent him from indulging in your touch at least a little.
Pushing you up against your front door, his lips trailed down your neck and into the expanse of your chest that was bared (courtesy of the cleavage you'd decided to bless Jungkook with). His lips were indecisive, going from your sternum and up to your neck, nipping lightly at times and easing the sting with flicks of his tongue. The pretty sounds you let out were more than reward enough for his efforts.
His knee ended up between your legs, itching closer and closer to your middle and digging itself there with a practiced precision that had you keening under his hold.
"Please," you sighed after some time, begging for something your dazed state likely didn't even know.
"Please what, baby?"
Your head turned, catching his lips again, but not in a kiss. It was too messy to be deemed a kiss, consisting of open mouths and too much spit to be considered sanitary.
"Come in? I wanna- Please come in," you pleaded, effectively killing Jungkook.
It took herculean effort for Jungkook to stay put. It was the hardest thing in the world to reject you when you were so desperate, when your voice was a mere breath of desire landing right against his lips before dipping into yet another kiss.
He couldn't help the groan that left him, but he replaced it with a chuckle when you whined at the separation of lips.
"You know I can't do that, baby."
"But I want you to!" you pouted, petulant and way too convincing.
His hand went up to your chin, turning your head towards him. It could've been considered a cute gesture, but his knee remained digging into your cunt (which was pulsing against him, driving him further into insanity) and your bodies were still too pressed up to be considered proper.
Looking up at him, you pouted, eyebrows hunched together in a way that let him know you were left wanting more. He thumbed at your chin in a soft manner, cooing at the adorable sight before him.
But you just had to pay him back for his teasing — though it was fair, considering his knee continued to dig into your cunt, earning tiny gasps from you and an eye-roll of pleasure.
You tilted your chin back, landing his thumb on your bottom lip and subsequently pulling it into your mouth (not that Jungkook put too much of a fight). Still staring into his eyes, you suckled at his thumb, wide, empty eyes making him lose himself.
He stood there, dumb and gone as he watched your cheeks sink in as you licked and sucked at his thumb, moaning when he pressed at your tongue. It was filthy and depraved and he loved it.
"Are you sure you won't come in?" you tried one last time, seduction in your voice.
It took everything in him. Every last ounce of self-control and survival skills in him to be able to deny you after you'd put on that little show for him.
But he'd worked too hard to fuck you within one day of having you. He needed to take his time and romance you as you'd always wanted. Sometimes he just knew you better than you knew yourself.
"I'm sorry, angel. I need to kiss you goodnight, okay?", he pouted back at you, chuckling when you mirrored his pout.
But then you smiled at him. Warm, accepting and especially enamored.
He had done good.
"I'll be waiting for a goodnight text from you," you said after he'd pecked your lips a few times, finally giving you enough space away from the door.
"I'll even text you good morning first thing tomorrow, beautiful," he smiled at you.
When you left (after even more chaste pecks), a smile overtook him. The half-forming boner was the last of his worries when he felt so happy at the outcome of tonight's events. He might've even skipped on his way to his car.
~
What happened next was slightly predictable to Jungkook.
He had sworn to himself he wouldn't. Had sword he'd give you privacy from now on. That he'd let things play out naturally now that he had you to himself, ready to fall in love with him.
Yet curiosity got the best of him once again.
He'd rushed his way home, even driving through a few red lights on his way. It was a life-or-death matter to him (or at least to his boner).
As soon as he was home, he ran to his macbook, opening up the tab that would display the only sight that would leave him satisfied when he was so pent up and needy for you.
And when he caught sight of what he'd been looking for, a groan couldn't help itself but to escape his lips.
There you were, busy with your hand between your legs as you sighed out Jungkook's name in between flicks of your clit. The sight was sinful, leaving Jungkook a lifeless version of himself as he groaned and cried out at the view.
Joining you in your touches was a given. He wished he could be there right now, working you to his desires, but he was still content with the current state of affairs. His hands undid his pants faster than they'd ever before, freeing himself from any clothing concealing him before losing himself in you.
He'd seen you touch yourself countless times, already well aware of what you'd do, how you'd play with yourself. But this time was different. This time it was rushed, desperate. It was a desperation he easily mirrored, completely empathetic to the feeling.
It didn't take him much to make himself cum, having already been on the brink whilst driving himself home. The effect some mere kissing and fondling had had on him was somewhat embarrassing, but he couldn't blame himself. Not when you'd been the cause.
Watching you cum, back arching and breath hitching at the overwhelming feeling. Even as he watched you, he felt pained. It was a depraved feeling he'd never experienced before, with the incessant need to be the one experiencing these feelings with you, cursing at himself for depriving himself from the experience.
Once the sensations seized, Jungkook closed his computer, setting it aside so he could ruminate on that day's occurrences.
Before going to sleep, he made sure to give you that 'goodnight' text he'd promised, smiling at himself when you replied, even adding a few heart emojis in tandem.
The development of your newfound relationship continued just as Jungkook had hoped.
More dates went by, with frequent stops at your cafe any time he had a short break during work (meaning, often). It was easy to tell that you were as enamored with Jungkook as he was with you. The many flirty texts and delivered flowers paid off, and it all felt very natural to him. Treating you the way you deserved, the way he'd been itching to treat you, it was like a gift to Jungkook.
It'd only been a month, yet it felt like an eternity to him.
He'd stopped keeping tabs on you by then.
Well, for the most part.
The curiosity after every date remained in him. Every time he held back and dropped you off without anything further than some kisses, he itched to know how you felt afterwards, instantly checking on his camera and even looking for any feedback you may have given your friends.
It was safe to say that you wanted him just as much as he did you.
Which made it all the more difficult to hold back from letting you pull him into your apartment and finally having his way with you.
But after this month of pure bliss, Jungkook finally decided.
He'd finally let himself have you in the way he'd been thirsting after.
Tonight, he'd planned yet another date. After that first one, it was virtually impossible for the two of you to stay away from each other. Not only did Jungkook want to spend every available second with you, but you were very responsive to that fact, always accepting and even suggesting dates.
But tonight was different. When you'd suggested some ice cream and a walk in the park, Jungkook took a risk and asked you if you'd rather come over, maybe watch a movie and eat some pre-bought ice cream (of your choosing, of course). It was a thinly-veiled excuse to get you in his apartment (and completely alone) for the first time.
And unsurprisingly to Jungkook, you accepted. There was a suggestive smile in your lips when you did so, leading Jungkook to believe that you were aware of his desires and even shared some of your own.
He couldn't help the anxious feelings overtaking him as he waited for you to arrive. He knew what was coming, knew that tonight would be the culmination of all he'd ever wanted since laying eyes on you. His skin burned at the thought of what was to come and his body shook in anticipation, goosebumps forming as the minutes passed.
When you knocked on his door, he couldn't help but run to it like a dog awaiting its owner's return. He didn't want to appear too giddy, like some freak only wanting to jump into your pants, but that fact was half reality. He was depraved for you. He was desperate, only having held back for so long because he had wanted to do things right, to win your heart before getting access to your body.
And finally he'd have both.
"Hey," you smiled up at him at his doorstep, front teeth digging into the plush of your bottom lip. You leant against his door frame, casual yet slightly nervous.
Looking down at you, he noted your cutesy pajamas. A matching set of tiny shorts and a tank top currently covered by an oversized hoodie, unzipped and letting him in on your outfit.
"Ready for our sleepover?", you giggled.
It was impossible not to be enamored by you.
When he'd suggested a movie and some ice cream at his place, you'd adorably suggested a sleepover, insisting on some movie marathon of his choice and all the snacks you could wish for. You'd said that it was an excuse to 'be domestic and shit,' as you'd put it. You also adamantly claimed you needed to check whether or not he snored in order to continue the relationship (all whilst blushing at the 'r' word, not having labeled things yet and unknowing that Jungkook would do so tonight).
He smiled back at you, doing his best to hold back from aggressively attacking you with the affection overflowing him. His mind battled between finding you adorable and wanting to lock you down and keep you in his bed for weeks to come.
"Come in, pretty. I got all your favorite snacks," he welcomed you in with a bear hug, humming loudly as he nuzzled into your neck.
"Hmm, you give the best hugs, I hate you," you grumbled when he let go.
Then you walked in as if you owned the place, practically skipping over to the couch nearby and eyeing all the snacks Jungkook had grown to recognize as your favorites — though he had known this from the months of watching you.
"Come on! Sit. I demand my sleepover," you whined, getting up from the couch and pulling him to sit right next to you.
He chuckled, finding you adorable yet again.
~
Only one movie was watched before things began leaving the PG-13 realm Jungkook had invertedly found himself in.
After a bit, you'd cuddled into him, with his arm enveloping you and accepting you into his chest as you continued to watch the movie. But the movie was the last thing in his mind. What he wanted was to see in person that body which he'd so often watched through a screen without your knowledge.
He had theories of what you'd feel like under his touch, of how you'd react to his. But ultimately, he knew that imagination would never compare to reality.
By now, neither of you were paying attention to the movie. Jungkook had been unfocused since the moment you walked in. However, you'd kept up the pretense of an innocent sleepover for a little longer than he did. While he'd been ready to jump you since the date began, you'd played dumb and cuddled up to him as you watched the movie, though not once rejecting his attempts to get closer and closer.
And now, after the first movie of the night was finally over, his hands became braver. Sensing your equal desire for him, he let his hands find your bare thighs, knuckles running up and down their expanse as he subtly looked to his side, watching you squirm at the touch.
You pushed yourself closer, legs pressing together a bit when his hand began to dip into the middle of your legs. With a giggle, you turned your body to face this, a failed attempt at concealing a smile showing on your face.
"Slick," you chuckled. You might've meant it to mock him, but you still began giving in, putting your own hands on him.
Naturally, he took advantage of this, grabbing onto your hips and pulling you to straddle his lap. Your hands found their place on his shoulders, sliding from his shoulders to his jaw while his did the same on your waist and hips.
Kissing you came just as naturally, pulling you in and trapping your bottom lip between his own two, making the kiss deeper than you'd ever kissed each other before. You instantly hummed into his mouth, hands reaching to his head and pulling him closer. His own remained on your hips, having fun squeezing at the plush skin there, bare due to your shorts having ridden up while straddling him.
With a self-prescribed oral fixation, Jungkook would've had fun kissing you for hours on end. He had already fostered a tendency to bite at his own lip ring, but the satisfaction he got from it only intensified when you did it — which was exactly what you were doing at that moment.
As you nibbled and sucked at his bottom lip, occasionally pulling at the silver ring with your teeth, Jungkook's hands began feeling you up, slowly losing their hesitation in grabbing at any curve he could reach. Your hands eventually came to do the same, finding his arms and sighing into his lips when you felt the stiff muscle under your hands.
When Jungkook got tired of feeling you up through your clothes, his hands reached the hem of your top, slowly reaching underneath it to ensure he gave you time to pull him away if you didn't want him to do so (which he was very certain was not the case, at least going off your own hands doing the same to him). Pulling off your top, he disconnected your lips, moving onto your neck and letting his thumbs feel at your bare nipples, chuckling at the low whine you let out at the action.
"You're so pretty, baby," he murmured.
His eyes were closed and his face nuzzled into your neck, kisses being left in his wake. But despite having not seen the expanse of your torso yet, he knew you were the prettiest thing he would've ever laid his eyes on. He'd seen you countless times. Maybe through a screen and maybe without your knowledge, but he'd seen you enough to have every inch memorized. Now was time to memorize it all to the touch.
"Yeah?", you sighed, numb, thoughtless, just like he wanted you.
"Mhm," he hummed in affirmation, "Already so needy, huh?"
His lips went lower, hand flat on the middle of your back to hold your body up and finding his way to your breasts, covering in licks and kisses as you sighed along to every single one. He was in cloud 9, finally able to touch you as he'd always wanted. In every way he saw useless men attempt to.
You became antsy quickly after that. He was sure you could feel his hardness under you, especially when you'd readjust yourself on his lap, huffing when his hold on you gave you no freedom to move and find some friction against him. It was unspoken, but he was in charge here. Your pleasure was entirely his responsibility, and he'd choose exactly how he'd give it to you.
After all, he knew you better than you knew yourself.
"Take me to your room," you mumbled in between heavy breaths, already exhausted with lust.
Without a second to hesitate, Jungkook's hands went under your thighs, standing up as he lifted you up, your legs wrapping around his waist. The trip was a short one, ending with you sitting at the edge of his bed while he stood before you, hand on your chin to ensure you'd look up at him.
And the sight made him crazy.
There was not a single thought behind those eyes, only unadulterated lust staring up at him.
He mindlessly thumbed his way up to your lower lip, clawing at it softly in a silent command for your mouth to open and allow him in. And to no one's surprise, you took him in, suckling lightly at the digit as you continued looking up at him, faux innocent look in your eyes.
A silent groan left him at the act, knowing that this would be what you looked like if you were to be good for him and get some other part for him in your mouth. But even the mere finger sucking had him fighting for his life. He pressed his thumb into your tongue, pushing back a little and getting a slight gag out of you before you continued in your adamant sucking.
"Fuck," he muttered.
Then he used that same hand to pull your face towards his own, leaning down a bit to meet you in the middle.
While the kiss in the living room had already been nasty enough for his liking, this one was nothing if not depraved. Your tongues met in the middle, before any lip action could actually happen. It involved a lot of teeth knocking and needy sounds released against each other, but Jungkook thrived off this neediness. Knowing you wanted him so badly that you lost all inhibitions, all sense of self — it made him dizzy with desire.
Mid kiss, he began lowering himself on the floor, pulling your neck down with him so you'd angle down, keeping your lips connected despite the newfound discrepancy in height. When the kiss finally had to be broken, he immediately latched onto the bare skin of your legs, hands itching to pull off your shorts and panties down (thankfully, you were still lucid enough to lift your hips and aid him in this). And then he was finally met with the sight he'd been craving to bury himself in for months.
It was plush, slightly swollen with desire and dripping with arousal, staring back at him as he attempted to hold back.
He dove in without a single second-thought, hands opening your legs far enough to find himself his rightful spot between them.
This. This was all he'd think about as he'd watch you date dumbass after dumbass, left displeased by every single one no matter how hard you tried to find at least a single competent one.
He gave you everything he had in him, licking at the expanse of your cunt before stopping at your clit and giving it special attention. His hands gripped at your thighs, angling you so you'd lay back on the bed as he had some alone time with your pussy. Your hands pulled at his hair, maybe too harshly, but he couldn't feel anything but bliss at that moment.
Your taste, your smell, your touch, it was all taking over his mind. This had been all he thought about night after night, watching your failed dates and hoping he'd be the next one on the list. He knew exactly how to please you, both from innate knowledge and from how much he'd studied you these past months.
"F-fuck, you nose ..." you cried out when it accidentally rubbed at your clit, intensifying its movements after your reaction.
"Taste so good, baby," he mumbled.
It was impossible to ignore his own arousal now, allowing himself to rub against the side of the mattress while he continued to lick and suck at you. His mind was fuzzy, completely overtaken by the pleasure your touch, your taste, your smell, your sounds, you were giving him.
When you came, he still couldn't stop himself. He continued lapping at you, drunk in the taste and far too blissed out to process that the current pulling of his hair meant you were too sensitive to receive more.
When your whines got louder, he finally let you go, sitting back on the floor as he caught his breath.
Worth it.
"You're insane," you gasped between heavy breaths.
But he was too busy licking at any leftover essence dripping on his chin, smirking when you gaped at him.
"You did this to me," he rebutted, "Maybe don't seduce me next time," and then he climbed back on the bed, taking his rightful place above you as he kissed you once more, tongue in first to ensure you got a taste of yourself.
Immediately, your legs wrapped around him, forcing him down onto your bare center and encouraging to bump his hips against yours. His hands intervened, working at his sweats as fast as he could so he could finally get that skin-to-skin contact he'd been craving. With your feet, you haphazardly tried to aid him in pushing them off, with them ending up at his ankles and ultimately pushed off by his own feet. Separation seemed to be offensive to him, refusing to disconnect his lips from some part of your body at any time.
"'m gonna fuck you now, okay, baby?", he muttered, landing one last kiss on your lips.
"Like this? Or do you wanna-"
"Mm, like this. Wanna see you," he said as if it was the most obvious thing ever (which, fairly, to him it was).
He didn't bother with a condom, knowing you were on birth control after one of the many flirty late-night conversations you'd had leading up to this night (though he already had this knowledge through his secretive means).
Entering you could not be measured nor compared to any other experience. He'd known the event would be ruinous, but his mind could not have ever come close to reality.
Your eyes practically rolled back when he bottomed out, giving him a sight that he could never forget. Part of him wanted to reach down to his sweats and pull out his phone from his pocket, maybe take a picture, set it as his lockscreen and utilize it any time you weren't around.
But the thought left him when you whined at him to move, claiming you needed him.
Your nails dragged down his back as he began hammering in, making him wince at the painful pleasure. Burying his head in your neck, he kissed at the skin there, groaning when you wrapped your legs tighter around his waist, pulling yourself as close as possible whilst attempting to move against him.
"Feel so fucking good," he grunted, "Made for me, huh? You were just waiting for me to fuck you, huh, baby? Needed someone who knew how to make you feel good."
He was telling on himself a bit, but he didn't care. He needed to assert his place over every man that'd ever touched you before. Needed to confirm it for both you and him.
"Yes!," you cried out, "So good, fuck."
Your words were mostly nonsensical babbles after that, with the occasional curse or sigh of his name mixed in.
Jungkook was in paradise. This was all he'd wanted ever since his eyes landed on you. The feeling of your pulse surrounding his cock made his eyes roll back, making him struggle to keep up with the euphoric sensations you were giving him. He now understood why every man that landed on your bed was unable to please you. You simply rendered them boneless vessels of bliss.
"God, never letting you go after this. You know that, right? All mine," he rambled, truth spilling from his lips.
But you liked it. Your nails dug into his back, head nodding feverishly in agreement at his words.
"Mhm. Yours, fuck. Please don't stop ..."
He groaned, further burying his head in your neck and pressing himself up as close as humanly possible. Any distance between you felt like a burn to him.
His orgasm approached, but he knew the telltale signs of your own by memory. You were right there with him.
"Feels so fucking good, gorgeous. She's gripping me so hard, fuck. She's gonna cum for me, hmm? Wanna see you cum, pretty," he panted out.
You wailed when his thumb made its way between you, nudging at you lightly and teasingly enough to have you seeing stars. The movements of his hips never seized, barely able to move with how tight you were but still working you to completion.
When you came, you dragged him down with you, sighing out words that made him lose his mind.
"Cum inside ... Please. Wanna feel it," and just like that, Jungkook lost himself in you, filling you to the brim with no shame.
His hips kept slapping against the back of your thighs, chaffing skin forming due to the friction. But the feeling took the backseat in the midst of bliss.
Jungkook allowed himself to lay his body next to yours afterwards, giving you the role of little spoon as he pulled you as close as possible, with your head lying happily on his bicep.
Multiple pecks landed on your lips, chuckling when you groaned at him pulling out.
"You're crazy," you giggled, kissing his nose and simultaneously melting his heart in the process.
He shrugged, playing it off, "Had to make my girl feel good."
"Oh? Your girl?", you teased.
He engulfed you in his arms, flipping you so you'd lay under him, both arms caging you beneath him, "You're kind of mine now, in case that wasn't clear."
It was voiced as a joke, but he meant it.
"No complaints here," you giggled, kissing him as confirmation.
Pleased, he sat the two of you up, patting your hip in a comforting manner.
"C'mon, baby, go pee. I'll be waiting here with a clean change of sheets, okay?"
And with that, you practically skipped away, giving him a few kisses in that post-coital bliss before losing him to the other side of the bathroom connected to his bedroom.
Before bothering to throw off the sheets, Jungkook looked over his shoulder, making sure you were out of sight. He reached under his mattress, collecting the old phone and tablet through which he'd grown accustomed to surveilling you with, chuckling to himself as he turned them off, giving them a silent goodbye before throwing them into the trash.
He wouldn't be needing them anymore.
to read short 1.8k word continuation (+ all other previously written bonus content) you can go join my jk monthly tier on patreon!
content: smut, stalker!jungkook, afab reader, jk watches reader masturbate without her knowledge, masturbation (both f and m receiving), oral (f receiving), cumming in pants, etc.
wc: 297 (teaser); 1869 (full drabble)
sneak peak:
Jungkook had planned to stick to his word.
When he swore to himself that he'd give you privacy, trust you and let you exist without his constant supervision, he had truly meant it. However, as it usually happened, he was able to create nonsensical logistics in order to go back on his word.
It's not like he watched over you as he did before meeting you, though! He truly did give you your privacy — well, to some extent.
Any time you left his apartment, landing a sweet kiss on his cheek and informing him you'd be out with some friends, he restrained (despite the tiny dress you'd be wearing, letting him know you'd be garnering far too much attention from onlookers), wanting you to have fun with your friends without his watchful eyes (even if you wouldn't realize he had the ability to track you anyway). But he held back, trusting you to go and head back to your own bed afterwards, sending him a text goodnight with a cute kissy emoji attached.
When you'd be too preoccupied with your phone, rather than checking your texts through his burner phone, he'd nuzzle into your shoulder, happy at your indifference of him eyeing your screen (where he'd usually just find you playing some silly phone game or texting your friends).
However, it was under the dumbest circumstances possible that Jungkook just couldn't help himself in invading your privacy.
And this was any time you spent the night alone in your apartment rather than in his.
Any time you slept away from each other, he just needed to take a peak, to access that hidden camera he just refused to get rid of and get a look at the little show you'd put for him (all without your knowledge).
...
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#jungkook imagine#jungkook smut#jungkook fanfic#jungkook scenario#jungkook scenarios#jungkook x reader#jungkook oneshot#bts imagine#seventeen fanfic#bts scenario#bts scenarios#bts fanfic#bts oneshot#bts smut#bts x reader
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Shaw pack head cannons. I have pt2
Marie took up healing magic so that pack members wouldn't have to spend money to go to a healer after getting injured or sick. It wa her way of showing gratitude towards her pack for what they'd done for her and Milo.
Colm wanted Milo to work for the department, going so far to try and steer Milo in the direction of doing so. However, Milo was quick to catch on what Colm was doing, and the two broke out into a massive argument about it.
Asher's parents always felt guilty for leaving Asher behind in pursuit of traveling around the world. While yes he's an adult, and had the support of his packmates, unlike his sister who they where present for the majority of her life up until she moved with her husband back to his pack and hometown. They immediately left the moment Asher could legally care for himself. Asher didn't blame them, nor did he hold any kind of grudge against them. He just kinda wished they stuck around longer before they up and left.
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Milo has a sleeper build body, and it drives Sweetheart wild whenever he decides to flex just to get a rise out of them. He gets a huge ego boost out of it every time, too.
Milo is the very much, I love to stay /hang out more but I have to go check on my cat and make sure he's doing okay and that he gets fed, etc, kind of person.
Whenever Milo is coming home from a rough or stressful job, he'll just pick up Aggro and Sweetheart, before heading to the bedroom to snuggle with the two, gaining a few cheek/forehead kisses from Sweetheart before all three fall asleep in each other embrace.
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One time, Sweetheart spooked Milo into shifting out of fear, and they've never felt so bad in their life until now. Just immediately pulled Milo's wolf into a tight hug as they apologized to Milo, their hand instinctively running through his fur as they kept hugging him til Milo slowly shifted back. They managed to get a laugh about the whole thing, but it took a bit of convincing from Milo that he was absolutely fine from the whole thing.
Whenever Sweetheart is experiencing a panic attack or feels an oncoming attack, Milo's either away on a job or hanging out with the pack members. They'll go to hide in their shared closet until it passes, unaware that Aggro is following them until Aggro is crawling into their lap and begins nuzzling Sweetheart, making biscuits on their lap, or making "conversation" by constantly meowing at Sweetheart. Manging to calm down, Sweetheart will thank Aggro before carrying him to the bed to take a small nap with him. Only to wake up to Milo petting their head as he lays across from them, and Aggro curled up between them, purring loudly.
Sweetheart, who'll make sure everything is up to code on Quinn's security/containment, double checking and ensuring the man doesn't even have a chance at escaping. Sending a list of details and updates of what they've gathered to the pack group chat at the end of their shfit before heading home.
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Darlin struggles to break their terrible habit of hiding bruises, cuts, etc. They won't even acknowledge whatever cut or bruises they have until someone points it out. Sometimes getting a bit defensive about the whole thing, as they're still not used to the idea of relying or asking for help from others.
Darlin swears they're not a good teacher, that they don't know or can't teach, and on top of it, someone who isn't an exact role model. Yet, can't say no whenever one of the younger pack members come to them on help on either learning on how to fight in their wolf form, getting better a shifting, etc.
Darlin is covered in various scars, small, big, either faint or not, depending on how old they are, either visible from afar others you can't really see unless you're up close.
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Whenever Sam joins in on pack runs, the others even David will try and race against him, and he'll indulge in their antics, pretending to slow down and acting a bit tired before blowing past them with ease.
Has gotten caught up in their spins out though it typically gets a chuckle out of him, because they always end up in a tangled mess, and he's trying to get them to hold still while he untangled them rather than having them wiggle around as they untangle themselves from each other limbs.
Sam will give Darlin a few words of encouragement whenever they're struggling to interact with the pack. He is struggling to hide the look of pride on his face whenever Darlin does it without help.
Sam, who's made to sit separately from Darlin during pack movie nights by Asher, because the two always end up falling asleep, not even halfway through the movie. Asher's attempts fail though because the two just "magically" find themselves right next to each other a few minutes later and are vast asleep, Sam having a tight yet gentle grip around Darlin's waist keeping them close and tight against him.
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David used to be in between a heavy sleeper and a light sleeper. However, after the inversion, he became an extremely light sleeper at the time, practically waking up to the sound of the blanket moving. He's gotten a bit better over time, but every now and then, he'll be awoken by the tiniest of noise.
Saw someone say that Darlin possibly has a limp due from the fights they've been in, 100% agree on it, yet overtime Darlin has learned how to adapt and normally functional with it, almost as if they've never had it. But given their age, they sometimes struggle to keep up on pack runs, so David will act as support and stick by them as they run together.
David gets dragged into the little playful scuffles that are mostly started by Asher, though he acts a bit annoyed by it. You can tell he enjoys these kinds of things that allow him to act like a kid/teen again. He'll sometimes switch up on sides every now and then or just team up on Asher with Milo and Darlin, ignoring Asher complaints that 3v1 is unfair.
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Angel will help David in looking for places that are suitable for Sam, of anything they can possibly bring with them if the place they're going to doesn't have much or doesn't offer any kind of shade, just to ensure Sam doesn't miss out on anything even if he claims he does mind being exclude from a few things.
(Both David and Angel won't allow it)
Whenever Angel manages to get David to lie on top of them, they'd usually have to hold onto him to get him to stay because he'll only lay on them for a few minutes, before trying to move, because he believes they'll end up hurt if he stays on top of them longer than usual.
Angel enjoys poking David's sides as they love getting a reaction out of him. Sometimes, David will pull them close to him in a tight embrace, growling in their ear for them to stop, or he'll punish them later for their behavior.
⋆⁺。˚⋆˙‧₊☽ ◯ ☾₊‧˙⋆˚。⁺⋆
You know those people who always have their arm around or hands on the person shoulders they're standing right next to because it feels weird if they don't or like have no idea what to do with their limbs in general. And on top of it, they give that little shoulder side pat or do that little shake when they get excited or happy about it. That's Asher, and it doesn't matter who it is, Babe, David, basically anyone who's close in range, Asher automatically has an arm slung over them or a hand on their shoulder.
Asher is very popular with kids since he's down to play with them whenever they invite/nag him to come play with them. Answers their questions with a silly response before going on to ask them questions that typically get a laugh out of them. Gets a laugh at pretending to scare the absolute crap out of their parents whenever he pretends he's dropped the kid whenever holding them. 100%, the one who starts tickle fights among the children. It's not uncommon for him to be the children jungle gym. On top of it, he'll be having a conversation with someone while it's happening and is 100% unphased by it.
Asher who'll jump onto one of the packmates back in a surprise greeting, the other typically being able to support the sudden weight but every now and then, it's enough to send both of them to the floor.
⋆⁺。˚⋆˙‧₊☽ ◯ ☾₊‧˙⋆˚。⁺⋆
Babe frequently smacks Asher's hand away whenever they're eating in or out, because no matter how much of their food they give Asher, it seems he's always coming back for more but at this point it's 50/50 for either more food or loving the reaction he's getting out of Babe.
Babe loves getting a rise out of Asher whenever they're over at Milo's and Sweetheart's place and just start loving on Aggro while Asher is whining at them. Milo often joins in, telling Babe how they should get a cat and telling them the perks about owning one, Babe acting all interested in what Milo's telling them all while "ignoring" Asher who's clinging onto them and whining on how they don't need a cat as they have him who is in his words much cooler than a cat.
Every now and then, whenever they're eating in or out, Babe will pretend they're full and offer the rest of their food to Asher, who's been eyeballing their plate after finishing his food.
#redacted asmr#redactedverse#redacted audio#redacted darlin#milo greer#redacted milo#redacted sam#sam collins#asher talbot#david shaw#redacted babe#redacted angel#redacted sweetheart#redacted shaw pack#redacted asher#redacted david#redacted fandom
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shadows of the dark
matt sturniolo x reader
1 2 3 4
summary : growing up in the ‘middle of nowhere’ small town in lochcliff, colorado, stories were heard of multiple strange disappearances, murders, animal attacks, and more. when you were younger, you never paid attention to that stuff. now at the age of 17 it’s all you ever hear about. what happens when you realize those ‘stories’ you heard growing up, may not just be scary fairytales people tell their kids.
warning ⚠️ : contains mature themes, smut, gore (nothing insane), angst, etc. this warning is for all chapters.
(this does take some inspiration from tvd !)
underage drinking !
chapter 5 : wicked games
the loud bass of the speakers coming from inside of the two-story tall house echos through the trees of the secluded property. the home being far away from town. in other words, the perfect party house for high schoolers.
“first party of the school year.” jayde sighs as she stands next to me on the graveled road in front of the house. teenagers spilling out of the home, flooding the front and back yards. “thank god it’s finally the weekend too.”
“yeah..” i nervously trail off as i fiddle with the hem of my shirt. jayde convinced me earlier that evening to stray away from my comfort zone and try in her words a ‘hot and sexy outfit to catch someone’s attention’ which is made up of a light grey halter top and a black miniskirt paired with knee high black boots.
i feel her eyes on me as i keep my own focused on the party in front of me. “girl don’t even worry, it’s gonna be fun,” she exclaims, “if you really aren’t up to this, we can leave. but just at least give it a chance, okay?”
i nod in agreement as i feel myself letting the breath out i didn’t know i was holding. “yeah okay.”
we begin to make our way into the party, dead leaves crunching under every step we take on the dewy grass, courtesy of the late summer and early fall transition.
the second we make it indoors, the smell of alcohol and b.o immediately hit me like a brick. the speakers thumping so heavily it was almost as if the home had its very own heartbeat.
teenagers completely overtaking the space of the house, leaving jayde and i pushing and shoving through the crowd of insobriety.
we eventually end up in the kitchen, liquor and alcoholic beverages scattered all around the marble kitchen island. red solo cups littered all over the floor and counters. a good amount of people in the room but no where near as much as the living room.
“finally.” jayde sighs happily. “okay what do you want? pink whitney, smirnoff, jack daniel’s, mikes hard, damn there’s a lot.”
“um…a shot of pink whitney.” i decide, maybe a little bit of alcohol consumption could loosen my nerves and allow me to help handling this party easier than being sober.
she hums as she grabs a tiny shooter of pink whitney from an opened pack on the island. “here you go.” she hands me my choice of drink.
she takes hold of her own alcoholic choice as she holds her shot up in a cheering manner. i pop the black lid off of the bottle and hit my drink with hers before we both tip our heads back and downing the liquid. my face scrunches immediately as i feel my throat burn.
i throw down the empty bottle to join the pile of other empty cups and take a deep breath, allowing the sensation to ease up.
“okay, i will be right back.” jayde says as she starts waking out of the kitchen. “i’m gonna go look for that hunk of a man christopher. so fine i just wanna bite him.” she expresses, exiting the room.
i softly laugh as i shake my head back and forth at her words. my eyes already searching for another shooter. when i find one, i grab it and begin my own exploration through the party.
a blue hue coating the living room from the black lights hanging from the ceiling and walls, where most of the crowd is. different projectors showing on a repetitive cycle of different colors as well creating a bright and fun atmosphere.
i squeeze my way through the drunken teenagers until i finally take notice of an empty couch in the corner of the living room. i let out a breath of relief as i walk towards the velvety red seating, and sit down.
taking the lid off of the shooter i had grabbed from the kitchen prier to coming to sit down, i chug it and sit the trash leftover on the floor beside my feet.
i cross my legs, relaxing as i sink into the soft cushion, feeling the alcohol calming my once sporadic nerves. watching the intoxicated cluster of people dance together, some even grinding against one another as a song i recognize as ‘wicked games’ by the weeknd comes on.
i bump my head to the song as it plays loudly through the home, the alcohol i’ve consumed causing a loopy feeling to enter my body. my head turning to my right when i feel a presence next to me.
“hey.”
a/n : this is so short omg i’m so sorry, i’m gonna be busy the rest of the day today and i wanted to hurry and get a new part out. trust next part will be longer but anyways 🤗
tags - @madisonsfavgirl @shitttttypoet @malsmind @matts-girlfriend
#matt sturniolo#chris sturniolo#nick sturniolo#sturniolo triplets#christopher sturniolo#nicolas sturniolo#sturniolo#sturniolo fanfic#sturniolo smut#sturniolo x reader#matt sturniolo smut#chris sturniolo smut#matt sturniolo fanfic#matt sturniolo x reader#chris sturniolo x reader#nick sturniolo x you#matthew bernard sturniolo#christopher owen sturniolo#nicolas antonio sturniolo#chris sturniolo headcanon#sturniolo imagine
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No. 27 | "Don't cry, I hate it when you cry." PG6
masterlist requests prompt list (if you request a prompt, please request a player for it as well!) warnings: none.
After yet another long day of work, you walk back through your apartment door and put your bag and coat on the hanger, tiredly wandering into the dining room and rubbing your eyes. You get the fright of your life, your boyfriend sitting at the table with a giant grin. After you calm down from the scare, you laugh slightly.
“Dios mío, Pablo. Some warning would’ve been nice.” He stands up and comes towards you, wrapping his arms around your waist.
“Lo siento (i’m sorry), I wanted to surprise you.” “Well, you definitely nailed the ‘surprise’ bit.” you chuckle, laying your head on his chest. “I cooked for you. Your favourite.” Your eyebrows raise in surprise. “Really? Why?” “Why not?” he shrugs, “You’re my girlfriend, I love you, I wasn’t busy, and I assumed you would’ve had a long day, so I did something nice.” You smile slightly, “Of course you did. You’re too good to me.” “Just as good as you deserve. Now, sit.” he pulls out your chair for you and more or less forces you down into it.
A plate of (your favourite food) is put in front of you, and you grin up at Pablo. “Gracias, mi alma (thank you, my soul).” “De nada (you’re welcome).” “So how was training today?” you ask, looking at him as you both begin to eat. “Good, I think we’ll play well in the game on Wednesday. Speaking of, are you gonna be able to come?” “I wish, and I hope so, but I’d have to ask my boss to finish an hour early. And when she’s the one approving it, there’s a very small chance it’ll actually happen. But if I can’t be there in person, I’ll be secretly checking the score on my phone under my desk.” you smile weakly, you really are sick of your nightmare of a boss. Pablo frowns. “How come everyone else’s leave always gets approved, but never yours? How come she always gives you more work than everyone else? Does she not like you or something?” You sigh and shrug, “Honestly, your guess is as good as mine. It sure seems like she doesn’t like me, but I have no idea why. I don’t think I’ve ever done anything wrong or made a mistake around her.” Pablo’s frown only grows. “I don’t understand why you even still work there, why can’t you just find another job? Hell, why can’t you just quit? I’ve told you before, I make more money than I know what to do with, it would literally be no problem if you stopped working, let me support you, and moved into my apartment with me.”
“Because I’d feel bad.” “Well, that’s stupid. Why?” “Just because. You don’t need to be paying for all my shit on top of all yours.” Pablo rolls his eyes. “You aren't a particularly expensive person, Y/N. You rarely even let me buy you anything. You insist on paying for your portion of meals and always buy me far too much for Christmas and my birthday, etc.” “Yes, because I’m your girlfriend, not your financial burden.” “Spoiling the love of my life every once and a while is hardly a ‘financial burden.’ You’re being ridiculous.” “I don’t want to argue with you, long story short, the answer is no. It’s just one annoying boss, nothing I can’t handle. And I’m fine with working.” Pablo scoffs and the room is silent for a few moments. “Look, I only suggest it because I love you, okay? I want you to just be able to come to my games, home or away, and not have to know about it 2 weeks before so you can apply for leave, only for it to be denied by that demon of a boss you have. I hate that you’re always exhausted on all our dates because you’ve had a long week, that you fall asleep so early that we never have time to do anything… fun… at night anymore. I just want you to be free and happy. Por favor? Para mi? (please? for me?)”
You look at him for a moment before looking down at your plate again. “I’ll think about it.”
Pablo grinned again, he knew that was more a less an ‘Okay, fine, you win.’
“Gracias. Te amo, mi vida (thanks. i love you, my life).”
Later that night, you guys were cuddled up on your couch, Pablo was watching the movie that was on the TV screen, and you were on your phone. Finally, he looked down. “What are you doing?” he asks curiously. You look up at him and grin. “Sending in my resignation notice.” His eyes go wide and he sits upright, “You’re kidding.” “Nope.” “Oh my god!” he breaks out into yet another grin, pulling you into a proper hug. “Thank you, thank you so much,” he whispers into the skin of your neck. “Why are you thanking me? It should be the other way around, you’re the one who’s basically retiring me early.” you smile, and Pablo chuckles lightly. Eventually, Pablo calms down from his excitement a little and watches over your shoulder as you finish typing out the email. “I can’t believe I’m seriously about to do this.” you say quietly, your finger hovering over the ‘Send’ button. “Neither, but I promise, you won’t regret it.” he presses his lips to the top of your head. A few moments go by, and you still don’t press the button. “Are you gonna send it, or what?” “Pablo, I’m scared,” you whisper, looking up at him, and he can see the worry and uncertainty in your eyes. His expression and tone soften, “Why?” “I don’t know… I just am.” “You don’t have to do this right now, you know?” “I know, but I want to.” “Then send it.” “I can’t.” “Well, that’s kinda stupid.” You thrust the phone into his hand. “You do it.” “You’re sure?” You nod. Pablo hits send, and just like that, you’ve quit your job. You stare at the ‘Sent’ message for a moment before bursting into tears, burying your face into Pablo’s chest. He shushes you gently, rubbing your back and repeatedly kissing the top of your head, before eventually pulling your head away so he can look into your eyes. “Don’t cry, I hate it when you cry. What’s wrong?” he asks gently. “I- I’m just so happy. Thank you, Pablo. Thank you so much for this opportunity.” you sniff, speaking shakily through the tears. “Anything for you, mi niña preciosa (my precious girl).” he murmurs.
“I love you.” “I love you too, más que nada (more than anything).”
#pablo gavi#gavi#pablo gavi fic#gavi fic#obvithebestsoph!gavi#pablo gavi x reader#gavi x reader#fc barcelona#fanfiction#football#football fic#culer#PG6
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Hey am a big fan of your writing especially the record of ragnarok ones do you think you could do ror hades and maybe other characters with a singer reader who's like Betty boop ?
Sure!
Hades/Apollo/Ares x Betty Boop!Reader
Hades
• Hades and reader probably met, ironically, through Zeus. I honestly don't think Hades is a fan of extravagant entertainment, so reader's singing caught his attention the most.
• Reader was probably dancing and singing in her own world (not even paying attention to her surroundings) when she realized she had company.
• This ended up becoming a routine for both of them, although reader was originally a little intimidated by the idea that she had to perform for Hades, over time she became more confident, even feeling happy to have caught his attention (especially considering that she was basically ignored by the rest of the gods).
• If we're talking about a relationship, reader honestly has her life figured out.
• Reader probably still sings for others from time to time, but her favorite place to sing is when she and Hades are alone in the throne room (because of the echo), they even dance a little waltz together.
• I like to think of this reader as a nymph (due to several things they has in common with Betty), so she doesn't have a sense of modesty beyond the basics of not walking around naked, which makes her an easy target for pervert people. But there's nothing to worry about! Hades is more than happy to scare away anyone who has intentions of going too far with reader.
• Hades can't really get mad at reader for that, though, he finds it adorable for how innocent she is, and that very innocence can sometimes get her into trouble, but gods, how he loves her.
• (additional note, HADES, KEEP ZEUS AWAY FROM READER)
• Sometimes reader enjoys singing alone, but the echo in the palace is brutal (that, and gods have enhanced senses), so it's easy for Hades to just go by the tunes and find reader. He likes to just look at her when he thinks no one else is. There's also a good chance he'll applaud her when she's done just to see her blush. How cute.
• Everyone in Hades' palace is now used to hearing singing coming from all directions, from his room, the throne room, the hallways, etc. It's not uncommon for the servants to be humming along afterwards.
• Hades is the type of partner who likes to embarrass reader a little, just because of how adorable she looks when she asks him for certain things (to speak louder, to repeat things), and he finds it funny if she responds violently (feather swipes for him), which will probably end in a bear hug from him. WHO GAVE YOU THE RIGHT TO BE SO CUTE?!
• Hades definitely likes to daydream about what it would be like if reader, instead of singing to other people or to him, sang to their future children. It's something that's becoming more recurrent than he'd like to admit.
• Luckily, they have all the time in the world to enjoy a few more tunes on their own before expanding the family, so enjoy it.
Apollo
• Apollo definitely met Reader at one of his temples! He is the god of music and the arts after all.
• There were probably a few times when Apollo went to this particular temple and would see that there were worshipers who just didn't show up, which was... fine. Until more of them started to not show up.
• And a rumor reached Apollo's ears (not at all because he was listening to someone else's conversation) that this was because of one of the priestesses, who had an inherently heavenly voice. Scuff, yes, of course.
• I'll be honest, at first Apollo probably thought about going to cast a plague on Reader if it weren't for the fact that he found her physically beautiful.
• Not only that, but when he heard her sing, it was definitely understood because mortals considered her a divinity, her voice was beautiful.
• And obviously, if there's something Apollo can't have for himself, he'll take it.
• Probably the one who took the longest to conquer reader because of his egocentric personality. The poor reader ran away from him faster than Daphne.
• But as the saying goes, he who perseveres triumphs. And somehow the angel who is a reader ended up agreeing to be with him. Much to everyone's surprise (and disappointment).
• Honestly, at first the relationship feels merely superficial, precisely because Apollo sees reader as some kind of trophy (AT BEGINNING). So they didn't interact much, or when they did it was Lovebombing.
• However, after a few weeks of interacting with reader, Apollo ends up surprising herself thinking about her when she sees something she KNOWS she would like, or when she ends up humming some melody composed by reader, among other things.
• She basically realizes "oh, I screwed up with this person" and sets out to fix it (in the only way he knows how).
• Apollo shows affection mainly through material things, that's kind of obvious. However, with this specific type of reader who is an artist like him, I think his gifts would be more based on poems, songs, art supplies, etc.
• It's his way of giving reader something she likes AND so he has an excuse to spend time with her.
• When Apollo is stressed about something (be it something like he stained his clothes, someone made him angry, etc) he demands reader sing to calm him down, preferably while he's lying on her lap. It works 9/10 times.
• Apollo is a HUGE fan of reader wearing sexier clothes, though he's definitely also in favor of blinding anyone who stares at her, which ends up with reader being both feared and respected by Apollo's entire fan base.
• Apollo likes to do reader's makeup, whether it's for a normal day or an important meeting, even before their fight, it's a kind of ritual he never misses. Sometimes he tries a more subtle makeup, other times he uses colors that represent him, others more exaggerated, but he always does it (CHANGE MY MIND, and he starts pouting if the reader does it without him)
• Two very different types of artists.
Ares
• My god, this Ares is a cinnamon bun. How is there so little footage of him?
• Where was i.
• I can see Ares meeting reader at some party with his father.
• While he was giving his opinion on some general aspects of the party to his father (who wasn't even paying attention to him--) that's when he SAW HER.
• Dancing carefree, singing with a melodious voice, in a (rather) short dress, there was the most beautiful woman Ares had ever seen (it was love at first sight).
• And Zeus, being the piece of shit that he is, upon realizing that Ares was staring at a pretty young girl, had no better idea than to try to talk to her-
• Fortunately for everyone, reader was terrified when this cheeky old man approached her, and in an attempt to escape from him, she hid behind Ares so that he would keep her away.
• At that moment, Ares got to know a little part of life, called happiness.
• Ares is much more shy than he would like with reader, precisely because he never really learned how to do things related to a serious relationship (not from his father at least) but he does the best he can!
• He can't help but turn red whenever reader gets too close to him, especially when she's wearing very low-cut dresses. He's a gentleman and tries to look away RESPECTFULLY, but reader genuinely doesn't understand what's wrong and tries to make him look at her to tell her.
• Ares tries to make the typical romantic gestures (of which he asks advice from people other than his father, like Aphrodite and Hermes), like bringing flowers to reader after a performance, inviting her to have tea with him, etc. All with his face steaming and red up to his neck.
• If we're talking about a current relationship, reader is guaranteed the Scary Dog Privilege. Even if this Ares isn't half as bloodthirsty as people think, he can use his intimidating appearance to ward off the perverts that reader constantly runs into, being something of a bodyguard.
• He doesn't understand much, about many things, but one thing he does understand is that reader has a beautiful voice, which brings him back to reality and at the same time makes him feel like he's dreaming, he really likes reader singing before sleeping. Non-ironically, he can fall asleep when she sings. It's just so relaxing…
• At least he doesn't turn red anymore about revealing clothes, but he definitely lends his cape to reader sometimes when they're going out in public, ESPECIALLY if Zeus is with them. He respects his father, but he DEFINITELY doesn't trust him with his partner. Ever.
• Ares might even end up learning several things related to music and dancing just because of his relationship with reader! She mentions some fun facts in passing, but Ares ends up storing them in his brain for no reason. At least now he doesn't seem so out of step with Hermes.
• Overall, a great teddy bear.
Shares, reblogs and comments are very welcome!
#record of ragnorak#record of ragnarok#record of ragnarok x reader#shuumatsu no valkyrie#shuumatsu no walkure#shuumatsu no valkirye#shuumatsu no valkirye x reader#ror hades x reader#ror hades#snv hades#ror apollo x reader#snv apollo#ror ares x reader#snv ares#betty boop#snv apollo x reader#snv hades x reader#snv ares x reader#ror x reader#snv x reader
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I've got problems with whomever designed Thane's fingers. Thane, Shepard / Mass Effect 2 (c) Bioware
Anyone remember that poll I posted in July? I shall share the results:
I did manage to produce two comics during my summer holiday but both were for Dragon Age, haha ha.... So there were delays for our second winner. But here it is! Thanks to those who voted :)
#thane krios#commander shepard#mass effect#mass effect fanart#comic#bioware#thane#shepard#custom shepard#dough scraper#never do I crave a dough scraper as much as when I look at thane's fingers. do people know about dough scrapers? whatever.#why do the fingers have to stick together? just give him one less finger if it's so damn important.#regarding the poll: sucks for everyone not voting for pathfinder as that game probably has the biggest backlog rn.#I don't know why I find that so funny. it just makes me giggle thinking about it.#anyway so I have been sick. I actually thought I would escape my summer sickness this year but alas. it arrived.#and at the worst possible time. every year my town holds this large and free culture festival and I was really looking forward to it -#but then the fever rolled in. I am still so upset. I'm crying over the spilled milk here. betrayal of the year.#it's fine. there will be more chances etc.
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PLEASE DO NOT TAG AS YOUR OWN OC OR PAIRING.
Nathan and Ruben share a bond more powerful than most; mutual understanding through past experiences no one should ever have to go through, and through past actions so horrible they cannot be spoken of. Their grief and the blood on their hands binds them to the STEM technology they created, which has alienated them from the rest of the world— but they give each other the comfort they have both longed for so desperately for years, and that is all they need. They are each other's counterpart; you cannot imagine one without the other, like two sides of the same coin. Through their pain, their grief, their desire, and their regret, they have become one.
anna akhmatova, the guest // bones; equinox // 'i won't become' by kim jakobsson // agustín gómez-arcos, the carnivorous lamb // by oxy // achilles come down; gang of youths // czeslaw milosz, from 'new and collected poems: 1931-2001' // 'extended ambience portrait from a resonant biostructure' and 'migraine tenfold times ten' by daniel vega // a little death; the neighbourhood // marina tsvetaeva, from 'poem of the end' // by drummnist // katie maria, winter // 'nocturne in black and gold the falling rocket' by james abbott mcneill whistler // micah nemerever, these violent delights // body language; we are fury // 'the penitent' by emil melmoth // chelsea dingman, from 'of those who can't afford to be gentle'
taglist (opt in/out)
@shellibisshe, @florbelles, @ncytiri, @hibernationsuit, @stars-of-the-heart;
@lestatlioncunt, @katsigian, @radioactiveshitstorm, @estevnys, @adelaidedrubman;
@celticwoman, @rindemption, @carlosoliveiraa, @noirapocalypto, @dickytwister;
@killerspinal, @euryalex, @ri-a-rose, @velocitic, @thedeadthree
#tew#edit:nathan#nuclearocs#nuclearedits#so much shame in my body but still used my taglist but um let me know if you want to be excluded from oc/ship web weaves#just really wanted to share this one because i'm very proud of it and i want it on my blog. so. :]#recognition of the self through the other + wanting so desperately for the other to be deserving of a second chance#because if there is hope for them than there is hope for you etc etc and so on. that's the core of their dynamic i think#they understand each other on such a fundamental level that no one else comes close to because they are in so many ways the same#like how in in the first game leslie could sync up with ru/vik and all that? nathan would be a VERY good candidate for that as well#and it makes me insane!! and then the added layer of nathan being lead developer of mobius' new and improved STEM system#which makes him the same as ru/vik AGAIN but in like. the way that they're both men of [computer] science#and there's the fact they both have a dead sister. they both killed their parents. they were both mobius playthings for YEARS#and they've happily killed and tortured during all of it. they're angry they're out for revenge they're completely disconnected from#the normal human experience and they're working with what they have. and then after all of that is over then what is left?#their story focuses on them picking up all the pieces. everything that's still salvageable at least. and try to start over in a way#they cannot be forgiven for what they've done but they can move on from the past and do different in the future#there's still things left undone and left unsaid... in my canon at least. i know there's not gonna be any more games. it's fine#anyway they end up going to therapy and then they get better they're not a doomed couple they just like being dramatic#if you read all of this we can get married tomorrow if you'd like
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doing important socializing activities (looking at lights and eating snacks)
#dogblr#rory borealis#my face#im working hard to socialize her properly#instead of the lackadaisical way i socialized mav#mav was fine it worked out but i left a lot up to chance#and shes a little more cautious to begin with#so im working harder to get her out and about#she almost doesnt fit in ny coat and she weighs one thousand pounds so idk how much more i can carry her in public#she is a gigantic puppy#but we suffer for those we love etc
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#ok im making one more dot post and then i am (hopefully) getting off tumblr and going to bed#liam payne#death#i do suggest not reading tbh because its just gonna be waffle. anyways#ive distanced myself from the boys for years for a multitude of reasons. mainly that they did things that disappointed me and i realised the#way i was attatched to them was unhealthy. so for the most part i listened and enjoyed the music and didnt pay Much attention to anything#else. and like liam. i always liked him in the band days because to me he was the underdog. the underappreciated and probs less stanned one#out of all of them. and when youre a fan i do feel like a lot of us just wanted them all to be appreciated. idk. but anyways yeah i did feel#for him. due to him backgroud growing up. his talent. etc etc. even though he wasnt my fav. and even when he did something wrong my teenage#self still defended him like my life depended on it. (embarassing) anyways. his solo music while it was not my fav i still occasionally#enjoyed. its just over produced pop like it was fine and i found it fun. in terms of him as an actual person by this point in his career i#didnt pay attention to him or the others that much anymore#and like. yeah as of recently as more stuff came out about him being kinda weird and rude and abusive 🙃🙃🙃 that was kind of the final#straw for me! like in terms of me giving a fuck about him. if he eventually came around cool but i wasnt gonna wait around for it.#god this whole thing feels so dramatic but i need to get it oit or i Know i will not be at peace lmao anyways#so yeah come to hearing about his death which. i hear about because of trin lovell on twitter like. shsvshs. anyways my reaction was#disbelief and just... nothing? like i said in my brain i had just disregarded him honestly. and even now i still just feel speechless.#to summarise my feelings. fuck him for how he treated his ex and probably other women as well. but also. he was my boy. he'll always be a#part of me. and it feels weird that hes just. gone. he suffered a lot with addiction and pressures etc and its just. sad that hes gone now.#that he never got to get better. and he wont get the chance to. im sad for his family. and anyone else thats gonna be affected by this#im always gonna remember him.#and thats all i have to say. honestly part of me feels SO dramatic for even typing all this out but here we are.#if anyone has read this far and wants someone to talk to im more than happy. and also just wanna make clear that i am fine#le text post
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ok let's catch up quickly
#so i went on a few dates w this guy. long hair beautiful face kinda looked like a girl (good) said yes ma'am when i told him to do smth#(also good) film student great at photography including candids. made a sheath of leather for a sword pin i have . et cetera.#he asked to cuddle and i was like iggg and then i felt Nothing and i was like ohhh yh ok ok yep lesbian#like he meets almost all my criteria but. yeahhh no . also at the end of that date he had some weird takes. anyway broke up w him and told#him actually im p sure im a lesbian (again) and he was like yk thats the second time this has happened to me this week but its ok bc ive#fallen for this girl from berlin. and then we cooked together. anyway . met a beautiful butch lowk in love w her. weve been on (1) date.#have two exams in a few days havent studied enough going to like end it all basically. my research partner kicked me off our research#(expected(it was always skinda sketchy)) which was devastating + it happened in a lidl 15 hours into a journey from bordeaux#to go back to the UK. my friends were kinda busy paying for baguettes but also they heard this whole exchange and are kinda mad at him#my friend of 10+ years is coming over in a few days. my evil ex situationship person that i decided to stay friends w because i kept#insisting they are a good friend and not evil and also extremely beautiful? turns out shockingly enough they were evil. tried to fix them#and then i realised due to their entire friendship group being ppl like me (Every Single One of their friends are ppl they met on dating#apps then led on then dumped and proposed staying friends w) and are collectively extremely attracted to them and not over them they#keep validating the most diabolical shit they say/do to hace a chance w them. they broke up w their ex and the way they keep leading#this poor girl on and making her heartbeeak worse and saying that they want more power over her and want her to beg for them back etc...MY#JAW HAD DROPPED esp bc i didnt even know the ex was in the picture BECAUSE ME AND ONE OF OUR FRIENDS (that they also dated) HAD JUSR SLEPT#NAKED TOGETHER IN THEIR BED W THEM. GIRL. anyway that is the least of the diabolical stuff they said but no we are moving onnn#this was b4 the beautiful butch btw. anyways . i have a mitski concert tmrw i think?? idek anymore#i used to have a crush on this guy very briefly and then it disappeared and then i realised if he fundementally changed everything abt#himself then maybe id like him but ofc i didnt tell him that but i still think abt it sometimes but anyway thats irrelevant now bc 99% sure#even if he did id still not find him attractive (lesbianism). please recommend good overnight moisturisers btw i have super dry skin#right. the friend of 10 yrs. we had a hard convo abt why she essentially bullied me in year 8 and it made me highly bitter but i also love#her and ik things are diff now its been like . Many Years . and shes going to stay a while I HAVE TWO EXAMS I DONT HAVE TIME but i love her#its fine. i think i might just switch into medicine and do the whole become a neurosurgeon thing (which was my plan B) bc plan A is looking#kinda impossible rn. I WANNA TALK MORE ABT WHAT THE EX SITUATIONSHIP PERSON SAID but i wont bc i dont wanna be too mean but also . MY GOD#i had a conversation w a philosopher friend about whether i have a moral responsibility to try to fix them bc unleashing this on society#feels wrong and he said 'probably but...run' so yeah im not talking to them atm. second date w beautiful butch on monday btw IDK WHAT TO#WEAR. she said she likes fems. im just gonna wear the shortest ralph lauren skirt i have w the cute leg warmers and hope 4 the best#its 1:15 AM im abt to drink coffee and start studying bc what the FUCK man. also almost finished watching the boys its very good#one of my best friends is struggling rn it is breaking my heart i want to take the burden from her i miss her very much
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> be a robin buckley fan
> be lesbian
> project on robin
> look up "internalized homophobia robin buckley" on tumblr because it's cathartic
> 3/4 of the posts are about st3ddie or just about steve
#saw one in which steve was like ''no robin you don't understand! i have never been loved! i don't know how that feels like!''#i have several grips about that interpretation#going from the fact that's not true (dustin is clearly a big steve fan + robin herself cares about him deeply)#to the fact he probably wouldn't be introspective enough to voice his emotions this concisely not to mention he'd probably wouldn't take#a moment to realize he's never felt loved if that were the case. i mean. he could think that. when he's like 35 and more in touch with his#inner world. 19yo steve can't even get the hint that hitting on a girl who's already clearly taken (nancy) is wrong so like i don't expect#him to be that smart#but i can live with people having takes i don't agree with. my opinion doesn't have to be everyone else's opinion if you see steve that way#it fine#what bothered me was the fact he was saying this to a lesbian living in the 80s lmao#who tells him that 1) her whole life has been an error 2) she doesn't think he'd want to be close to her if he truly knew her and 3)#3) is paralyzed by fear of social suicide if she dares believe for even a second that the girl she likes may like her too#like i dont need people to do deep dives into robin lore and quote from memory lines from Surviving Hawkins abt robin feeling like she's#rotten inside. not supposed to have friends. feeling like something is wrong with her and that pushes people away etc etc#the fact that she's a lesbian should tell you enough abt who has the biggest chances of being loved 😭#also bothered me that it showed up when looking up posts abt internalized homophobia because?? where's the internalized homophobia therw#unless it's gay steve feeling bad abt it in an AU (as if canon robin didn't go through it)#like look im not bothered to find steve-centric content in the robin tag cos people are gonna tag her in posts mentioning her.#she's his friend.#but there are barely any posts at all about robin's internalized homophobia. like i saw 2 or 3. compared to all the steve or steddie ones#where's the love for my babygirl 😭😭#anti steddie#not really but y'know i don't wanna bother anyone#edit: the bit about there being like 3 posts on robin w internalized homophobia isn't exactly true. there are a few. but they still feel#drowned in st3ddie posts#like something isn't right here
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my bro making my fave meal gluten free for me!!! 😭❤️
#fettuccine alfredo my BELOVED#have had it once since going gf 💔#he def is doing it bc i just got dumped 😂#which is v sweet of him tbh#i'm actually pretty ok with it now it was just right after it happened that i was crushed#but felt weirdly at peace abt it the following night and now i'm basically fine lol#still sad but i can 100% say it's for the best#there is a chance we couldnget back together but i honestly think it would be a bad idea#just can't promise i wouldn't let myself be talked into it bc of feelings#but tbh a relationship needs a stronger foundation than just feelings we didn't communicate well and he didn't prioritize me#which is fine as friends and we have lots of fun so we should def stay friends#but romantically i dont think it could ever work despite how i feel#and im not gonna settle for someone who won't prioritize me even if it means i end up alone#he has a lot of growing up to do and i don't think he ever will#so as much as i like him i think it would be a mistake to pursue that relationship#so i'm actually verybat peace w the breakup#like obviously my feelings are hurt and it felt like deeply awful like i'm unlovable etc i was falling apart the first night#then i just went numb and thought abt it rationally and im fine now#still a little sad but very much fine#but its still nice my bro is doing something nice for me lol#my whole family is feeling bad for me bc i was such a huge hysterical mess on friday night 😂#but by saturday night i was actually okay 🤷♀️#i know it goes in phases but i think i actually am ok fr#even tho i was really falling for him i know it would have been a mistake so im okay#i should be more hurt bc of the rejection itself maybe bc im really sensitive to that but i'm not anymore and idk why#lol#this has been a shitpost#don't reblog
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My main takeaway from TSC now being the second trilogy is that I'm gonna spend the next two books waiting for Stuart to do his routine of showing up out of nowhere, being an absolute cunt for no reason, and then leaving at least one more time. Do I think it will happen? No, I didn't even expect it the first time. But a girl can dream.
#I also like being able to fully call it the second trilogy it's such a neat separation from original canon that recognizes the time that has#between installments. and its simmetrical and scratches my brain. win win#other niche thing that I will need is a name drop or truly just any confirmation that Ichirou's fiance is real#only because I truly don't believe she exists. also RIP my man for getting married at 24 I still mantain he should have been at the club#Nora Sakavic has the chance to be the funniest person alive and make that fiance Allison.#absolutely implausible AND impossible but it would be. So funny. You go queen canonize the rare pair you basically made up for a tumblr pol#third niche thing is that I want more Zane. i know that one we're definitely going to get unless chekovs gun gets shoved up someones ass#my guess is he's either gonna be a whistleblower for the press or kill himself in front of Jean. no in between. 50/50 odds honestly#i say niche bc I am fully aware I am the only person in this fandom that fucks with Zane#but that's fine. a boy would be the son of France etc etc etc#stuart hatford
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is gale actually the worst guy alive or do people just have personal issues that give them a complex whenever someone else is a master of their craft and confident about it 🤔 hmmmmmmm
#im sorry but i literally never found him to be abrasive bc yes an archmage and chosen of mystra and wizard and the designated Lore Dumper#is going to be more knowledgeable than you and that's fine LMAO#and him knowing abt the tadpoles isn't him being an arrogant know it all it's just him letting the character know what's at stake#and also the others given that some of them don't know that or feel pressured to act (see: astarion and wyll)#and re the sorc vs wizard stuff.. again... someone that has to go to school and study the art Is going to#be more learned and well read than someone that doesn't#someone that was an archmage and lover to magic itself and a child prodigy etc etc IS going to#know more like . cope#i just never found him to be horrible or as annoying as people say bc i don't take offense to confidence or prowess or info dumpers?#early access is a different beast. but official release gale? the guy who shares crazy life stories every time? and is trying#to bond with your character every chance he gets? and who doesn't admonish your character if you fail to channel#the weave and instead is a good enthusiastic teacher to your character? who has a reasonable reaction to your character#not taking him seriously and is super appreciative when they do? like. L + skill issue + get over yourself + it's really not tht serious#+ i'm telling tara + i'm also telling morena + smiting you smiting you smiting you smiting you smiting you smi#this dude was mentored by magic itself. he was taught by magic itself. he made love and was ''loved'' by magic itself. he was its chosen.#he was in contact with legendary wizards by the age of eight. he cast a spell using blackstaff. he was conjuring things#as early as a toddler. if his early access prowess is still canon then this dude was able to lift entire buildings#and battle beholders super easily and after the game he rebuilds half the city using his magic.#and so on and so forth like i'm sorry to say but gale really is that bitch and he's not an awful person for Knowing that and trying to#make that known so that he can have a purpose in the group like. hello. for the love of god hello whats not clicking 😭#and i'm not saying he's a humble precious bean i'm just saying that final release gale can be pompous and puffs himself up#but it's not like there's no merit to what he's saying LMAO#🤦♀️ anyway.
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not my first reaction to this information as i learned it during the intermission of challengers (yes i finally went to see it) and i was having a lowkey breakdown through the intermission and the beginning of the second half a little bit but ummm: well of fucking course i literally dont deserve anything
#why did i even try this hard. i dont think i deserve anything tbh#dont mind me sounding dramatic im actually fine like lol#im sad but ok but also like. i got used to being a failure and a disappointment this last year so#i feel very tired now. it wasnt a bad day overall and im happy i decided against going alone today#bc i wouldve literally ended up crying in public if i was alone lmfao#ah. ahhhhh :/ i really really really was hoping for a better outcome#stupid girl as always#anyway i really am fine i just need to be dramatic for a moment. i truly do not deserve anything i get ever im sorry#if anyone read until this point and wondering what the fuck couldve happened that got me like this#well it's truly not that important in the grand scheme of things and im being stupid#got wait listed for another scholarship lmao </3#truly stupid and foolish of me to even think from the start that i could do this lmao#what's even more stupid is im still like well. well 🤠 hey maybe 🤗#i just know im going to be feeling extremely guilty for even existing even if i end up being able to go at this point lmao#and it's so stupid to even write all this. over something like this when people have real problems and stuff lmao#truly what did i think make me worthy of this chance im so not special and dont deserve this etc etc#all this negative self talk and i will still be sleeping like 😴😴😴 still hoping for the best dont worry#and that's because im stupid#🗒#i will drink tea this day has been lacking tea so critically :/
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i’m absolutely not complaining about ttpd as an album, i love it even more than i thought i would, but i do kind of wish she would’ve waited to release it until after the eras tour was over so it could’ve gotten its own tour :/ like the visuals and the stage design and the outfits are just sooo good and not only is it being cut down into only seven songs so it can fit into an already massive setlist, but everyone who went to the shows in the us, mexico, south america, asia, and australia — aka a huge portion of the tour dates — didn’t get to see any of it live. like it’s so impressive that taylor was able to add the ttpd section into the existing setlist but i can't help but feel disappointed bc this means we likely won't get a ttpd tour, which is something i would kill to see </3
#i know so many people demand new content from her constantly but with everything she’s been doing we didn’t NEED this album so soon yk#i personally would’ve been fine waiting another year or even longer if it meant ttpd could get its own era#bc it’s kind of impossible for it to fully have that when she’s already a year into this huge tour#she’s already had to cut so many songs to fit everything (not even everything bc there’s no debut set)#with lover/folklore/evermore not getting their own tours bc of covid it makes sense why she did the eras tour instead of a midnights tour#but now that touring is an option again it would’ve been nice for her to slow down her releases a bit to really focus on new albums more#idk maybe this is a hot take bc ofc the eras tour is incredible and i do feel so lucky to have gotten to go at all#but i just really wish i could see ttpd songs live and it seems like i won’t get that chance until the next tour#which will likely be years from now and who knows how many albums she’ll have put out by then#rn all i can do is hope that she’ll add another us leg or something so i can see eras again with the new setlist#but that’s very unlikely since she’s already added shows in miami/indy/etc none of which i can afford travel for let alone resale tickets#no one’s gonna even see this but if anyone does i hope it’s not taken the wrong way bc she’s given us so much in the past few years#sorry for the essay i just love ttpd and i want to see it live </3#lj speaks now
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