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#it's both kind of funny and genuinely shocking
deadsnakey · 18 hours
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𝐇𝐀𝐓𝐄 𝐘𝐎𝐔? 𝐖𝐄'𝐑𝐄 𝐈𝐍 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐖𝐈𝐓𝐇 𝐘𝐎𝐔!
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𝐏𝐎𝐋𝐘!𝐌𝐀𝐓𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐎 𝐱 𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐄𝐑 𝐱 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐎𝐃𝐎𝐑𝐄
—> Mattheo Riddle and Theodore Nott love to bother you, it's so obvious they hate you. Do they really, though?
Check out the request here!
—> Enemies to lovers, kind of... Fluff, a little angst possibly and two idiotic boyfriends who think bothering you very clearly means they like you.
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★ Ok, this might be a little messy but just stay with me here.
★ since first year, mattheo thought you were so pretty and just adorable. though, he always kept his distance as much as possible.
★ it wasn't untill around third year that mattheo and Theodore started getting really close, eventually dating in 5th year.
★ but there was still a huge problem, you.
★ they both knew they liked you, they've talked about it voguely a few times and since then they've had to an understanding that you belong to them and no one else...even if you didn't know it yet.
★ unfortunately for you, they only knew one way to flirt; teasing and bothering you.
★ its not too long until you start trying to avoid them as much as possible, knowing you'll be teased relentlessly or the butt of their joke that you never found funny.
★ they always called you names like princess, sweetheart, doll or darling. nicknames in Italian from Theo that you didn't really understand.
★ Stealing your pencils, notebooks, homework or even your wand just to get your attention. They'd dangle it where you couldn't reach. Anything for your attention.
you were going to your last period of the day, hoping you'd be able to make it through without seeing them, the two boys. you've been lucky enough to go the whole day without seeing them but you still technically had two more hours before you'd be safe in your dorm for the night.
you've made it to class, and successfully made it through. walking through the halls, listening to music. your huffy puffy friend ended up stopping you for a few minutes to ask about the material you both were learning at the moment in potions.
once done, you quickly started walking again, about to press play on your music again when you feel someone lightly tap your shoulder. you sigh to yourself, hoping it wasn't the two boys whom you've been dreading of seeing; let alone talking to.
"hey, princess. where you've been lately? hm? avoiding us, weren't you?" mattheo taunted, a smirk stretched on the side of his lips.
you slowly blinked, in disbelief. "why? miss taunting your toy? can you guys just leave me alone? I've done nothing to you." they both huffed, "toy? is that how you really see it? you know it's quite saddening you'd think of us in such a way, darling." mattheo put his arm on theodore's shoulder, slighting leaning on it.
"yeah, okay." you harshly spat out, turning on your heel to get away from them. Theodore was quicker. he gently but firmly grabbed your arm and pulled you into his chest making you stumble; your back now touching his clothed chest. you were quickly intoxicated with the smell of faint cigarettes and cinnamon.
"what? got nothing to say now, tesoro?", "don't call me that. and let me go!" you struggled. "someone's feisty, eh? c'mon, lets go to my dorm. I think we need to have a little chat with you." mattheo said, gently putting his hand on the top of your head in a genuine gesture as Theodore started walking, mattheo in front as he led the way and Theodore making sure you're not trying to escape from behind you.
★ safe to say, you were scared.
★ but they really did just want to talk to you. they confessed their feelings for you although you were confused. they hated you.
★ they explained that they didn't hate you, they were head over heels for you if anything. they just...had a really bad way of showing it, hence the constant and brutal teasing.
★ you were shocked. but you told them that they needed to give you some time, you told them as long as they toned it down and stopped being so cruel with their teasing and jokes and actually got to now them, you'd consider dating them.
★ They finally got your attention and they loved it.
★ after 4 awful months of torture from these two, it payed off.
★ fast forward to the end of sixth year, you developed feelings from them both and heavily overtime. that's when you told them that you had came to falling for them and would love to date them both; now that you felt ready.
★ they were soooo happy, definitely lots of affection from these two the rest of the day and night.
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ardentperfidy · 9 months
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#it's both kind of funny and genuinely shocking#how many self proclaimed leftists there are i see on here and social media more broadly#who nonetheless wholeheartedly buy in to this almost fukuyama-n sense of american power#this stated or implied sense that if american elites wanted something to happen in the world it would happen#and look to be clear i disagree wholeheartedly with biden's handling of the ongoing genocide in palestine right now#it's clear that the US does have plenty of leverage it could be using and isn't#but it's so silly to me that people can't also see the us isn't running this show#instead like. the us is a declining imperial power#that's already shown it can't reliably project sufficient power to secure its preferred policies in the middle east#and it now has an unruly fascist-trending semi-client state armed with nuclear weapons#with substantial cultural and financial influence on us domestic politics#and the aspiring fascist leader of which has made sure to maintain significant ties with other far-right/fascist leaders like putin#and when the us has given the SMALLEST amount of pushback israeli officials have just straight up refused and contradicted it#that's why you've got israeli ambassadors giving interviews just fully admitting there will be no two state solution#biden administration pushes for timelines and bibi goes on tv and says nah#i fear we rightfully critiqued the lack of ethics in realpolitik and then forgot to inject a sense of reality into a politics based on ethi#*ethics#anyway rant over will probably delete later
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its always so funny to me in movies/shows when people get shot in the chest or whatever and die instantly. like. no lmao
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ozzgin · 2 months
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Yakuza reacting to Y/N reading The Way of the House Husband for a starving soul ?😞
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Featuring the yakuza men and a manga about a yakuza househusband. Content: gender neutral reader, fluff, violence
Daitou is intrigued by the idea and asks if he can borrow the first few volumes. The next day, he comes to return them. "Didn't like it?", you question him. Quite the opposite. He finished everything, and went to the store to buy all the volumes to date.
He is terribly amused by the plot and likes to imagine it's just how your married life would look like. If only it'd be this peaceful for the both of you, too. He smiles fondly at the thought, squeezing the blood out of his shirt. As he puts his tools away, he realizes a droplet had made it to the cover of the manga he was reading. Damn it! He'd been flipping through the pages while waiting for the latest interrogation to die.
Kazuya may tease you about it. "Oh, is that the kind of stuff you like, (Y/N)? You want a househusband?" He'll pretend to ponder the possibility with a grin.
You like showing him chapters you consider funny, and sometimes ask him if the depictions are realistic. "This actually reminds me of something that happened to one of our underlings", he'll begin. You listen to his story intently, and once he's finished, he'll ruffle your hair, chuckling at your focused expression. "Maybe I should reach out to the mangaka to give them some inspiration, huh?"
Boss finds it funny, and might go through some pages just to have something in common to talk about with you. You wonder if he finds it puerile or inaccurate, but an entirely different discovery is made: he's terrible with household chores.
"Wait, is that how you do the laundry?" he'll ask in genuine shock, staring at the panels.
"You didn't...know?" you retort, raising your eyebrows.
"Wow. I'm learning a lot of things."
He laughs and flips another page. You suddenly realize why he's banned from using a kitchen or why his help is always denied when it comes to menial chores.
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[Yandere Yakuza Story]
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osarina · 3 months
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ᡣ𐭩 SOMETIMES ALL I THINK ABOUT IS YOU (LATE NIGHTS IN THE MIDDLE OF JUNE)
FEATURING: dazai osamu
SUMMARY: realizing you have no idea when dazai's birthday is, you and chuuya embark on a massive quest to figure it out. and you do—but you also find out something far more worrying in the process, making you question if you ever really knew dazai osamu. the issue? you have no way of bringing it up to him. but you'll have to worry about that later anyway. first things first: you have to plan a birthday that dazai will never forget. {sfw, 14.8k}
AUTHOR'S NOTES: AHHHHHHHH HAPPY BIRTHDAY BABY BOYYYYYYYY im so proud of how this fic came out genuinely its my favorite thing ive written to date. i hope you guys enjoy it as much as i enjoyed writing it (warnings: fem!reader, mostly fluff with some angst sprinkled in at the beginning and end)
“Hey, do you know when Dazai’s birthday is?” 
“Jesus fucking Christ, do you ever stop thinking about him?”
Your jaw drops as Chuuya lets out the loud complaint, head snapping to the side to focus on where he’s sitting in the chair at the tattoo parlor near headquarters, cheek pressed against the headrest, glaring at you as the artist continues to work on the right half of his upper back, finishing up the last section of the art spanning across his entire back. It’s his biggest one yet, you can hardly see an inch of unmarked skin—bright reds of camellia flowers and different types of animals and objects centered around the skull of a ram decorate his back. It’s beautiful, you have to acknowledge that, you don’t think you’ve ever seen such a stunning tattoo before and Chuuya is beyond pleased with how it’s turning out considering how he’s constantly pulling off his shirt to look at it in a mirror whenever he gets the chance.
To honor the Flags, he’d told you when he dragged you along for the first session. You didn’t know most of them—you’d worked with Lippmann a few times considering his job within the Mafia, and you’d met with Iceman to give him the rundown on targets that needed to be handled when Mori would send him to you in Kyoto, but that was about the extent of your interaction with them. Chuuya’d been closer to them—he didn’t like to talk about them at first, but he’s gradually been more and more open with it.
You think it’s because he’s afraid of forgetting them.
“You’re an asshole,” you snap after getting over the shock of his rude comment, turning your head away to look out the window.
Dazai evades the two of you whenever Chuuya has one of his sessions scheduled. You think it’s kind of funny, honestly; you know he does it because he hates pain and he knows that if he joins you guys, Chuuya will somehow goad him into getting a tattoo with a dare or a challenge that he won’t be able to back down from. So, instead, he makes excuses for missions that you both know damn well he doesn’t have.
“No, I don’t know,” he finally says irritably. “How the hell am I supposed to know?”
You give him an appalled look. “He’s your friend, and your partner. What do you mean you don’t know?”
“That bastard is not my friend,” Chuuya instantly hisses, but you can’t help but notice that he suddenly looks troubled by the realization that he doesn’t know Dazai’s birthday.
“Yeah, okay.” You roll your eyes, knowing damn well that it’s a blatant lie. “That’s a fucking lie if I’ve ever heard one.”
“Is not,” Chuuya spits.
“Is too.” 
Chuuya would have kept going with the back and forth, but he’s given a sharp look by the tattoo artist working on his shoulder and he settles down, but not before shooting you one last withering look.
“I bet he knows your birthday,” you add after a few moments of silence, just to trigger Chuuya again.
It works.
He lets out a noise more befitting of an animal, head snapping back to the side to look at you. “He definitely does n-” He cuts himself off before he can even finish the sentence, glaring at you. “That’s because that freak knows everything somehow.”
You only give him an easy shrug. “Just saying, it’s a bit…” You give him a twisted expression, nose wrinkled and lips pressed together rather than saying the word out loud, and Chuuya looks murderous. 
“It’s a bit what?” Chuuya demands. “You don’t know his birthday either.”
“I’m not his partner,” you counter to hide the fact that you are very bothered over not knowing his birthday.
“No, you’re just his girlfriend,” Chuuya says snidely.
Your face heats up. “I am not his girlfriend, Chuuya,” you scowl. “Shut up.”
“Yeah, okay,” Chuuya replies sarcastically, giving the tattoo artist an apologetic look when he gives the ginger another sharp warning with his eyes. “If Dazai wanted us to know his birthday, he would have told us. Y’know how secretive he gets over his personal life—he’d be shouting it off every rooftop if it was something he wanted us to do something about.”
You’re not quite as convinced.
At first glance, Dazai doesn’t shut up—he finds any and every reason to hear himself speak, whether it be random facts about crabs or ranking methods of suicide from least to most painful. Because of his tendency to run his mouth, most people don’t realize just how secretive he is about his personal life. You’ve realized that he probably uses it as a tactic to evade questions, because when people do poke and prod about his personal life, he becomes avoidant, expertly redirecting the conversation to something less personal by subtly changing the subject or pissing off whoever (Chuuya) is talking to him. You always catch it—conversation manipulation is your thing, you’ve finely honed your skills in guiding discussion to your discretion, it’s a skill that comes in handy at the negotiation table and in politics. You know he knows that you catch it too, always watching you carefully to ensure that you don’t call any attention to what he’s doing.
You don’t, of course, you’re not going to put him on the spot like that, but you don’t understand it. Well, you can to an extent—if you had random people prodding at your personal life, you’d also evade the topic. But you and Chuuya aren’t random people. You’re his friends, and you can’t for the life of you understand why he won’t open up to the two of you a little.
Every time you bring up the subject of him to him, he starts acting strange and cagey, like he knows that his evasion tactics won’t work with you and he wants to say something, but simply can’t get the words out. Maybe it’s his mistaken belief that he doesn’t deserve all of the things other people take for granted: comfort, friends, happiness. But still, you can’t imagine that Dazai doesn’t crave the experience of a normal birthday—well, as normal as things can get for teenage mafiosos—because you know that Dazai at his core simply wants to be a normal teenager.
As to why Dazai would rather deny himself happiness than to let you and Chuuya closer than arm's length? The answer alludes you even you.
When Chuuya grimaces, letting out a heavy breath and averting his gaze, you think that he’s come to the same conclusion as you.
“I assume since you’re bringing it up, you have some sort of plan?” Chuuya sighs, tired.
You smile.
“Naturally.”
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You think Chuuya might kill you after this.
You can’t help but snort to yourself as you kneel on the floor next to Mori’s desk, rifling through his drawers to find the key to his file cabinet. Chuuya is somewhere downstairs trying to keep the man distracted with a fake medical condition while you try to find Dazai’s file in his office. You can hear him in the ear piece you’re wearing, flustered and stuttering over his words. You can almost picture how red his face is. 
Chuuya isn’t a bad liar, usually—in fact, he can act his ass off on missions—but lying to the Boss is an entirely different story. You think that you probably should have been the one to keep Mori distracted, but you worried that if Mori got up here and Chuuya was still searching, he wouldn’t be able to play it off. So, this was the lesser of two evils. 
Mori is getting increasingly more irritated as Chuuya keeps miswording the symptoms and backtracking, then blaming it on how ‘his head just hurts so bad, he can’t think.’ You’re sure he’s starting to suspect something—or more likely, the man probably figured it out right away—but you also know he’s too hyper-paranoid about losing his strongest ability user to dismiss Chuuya’s blatant lies for what they are.
You let out a victorious puff of air when your hand encloses around the key you’d been searching for, immediately shuffling over to the file cabinet, unlocking it as quickly as you can to shuffle through them, trying to find Dazai’s.
Mori has too many files, you think to yourself frustrated, eyes scanning as fast as you can as you flip through them, trying to spot the one you need, becoming increasingly more frantic when you hear Mori and Chuuya enter the elevator, not sure if they’re coming up to his office or if Mori’s dragging Chuuya down to one of the lower floor infirmaries.
Fuck, you think, finally flipping through to the D’s and letting out a frustrated groan when his file isn’t even there. You go through it again, more carefully this time, and nearly tug out your hair when you realize that either Mori misplaced Dazai’s file or there isn’t one. But you can’t imagine either of those options being true.
Getting increasingly more anxious as the seconds pass, and knowing that Chuuya actually will kill you if he embarrassed himself like this for nothing, you start rifling through the other letters in a panic. From the A’s all the way to the Z’s, it’s only on your second scan through that you pause, spotting a thick, unnamed file in the T section.
You stare at it for a moment, brows furrowed, a gut feeling twisting inside you as you try to pull out the file. It’s a struggle—the file is thick and the drawer is stuffed, but when you finally get it out and flip it open, your eyes widen when Dazai’s face stares back at you in the top left corner of the first paper in the file. He’s younger in the picture—no older than thirteen or fourteen—both eyes uncovered, black and void of life.
You let out a shaky breath, heart racing as your eyes scan dismissively over any information that’s not his birthday, because you know damn well Dazai will not take kindly to yours and Chuuya’s snooping and you want to mitigate the damage, only to halt when your gaze catches on blacked out information right above the date.
His name?
You pause, eyes focusing momentarily as you try to understand what you’re reading.
NAME:  ████████████████ 
ALIAS: Dazai Osamu
What?
You don’t know how long you stare at the file, lips parted and a torrent of emotions clawing at your chest. Mainly confusion, but also something else—tighter, more unwelcome. You don’t even have time to try to figure out what you’re looking at because at once, the remote in your pocket is buzzing, the last signal from Chuuya that Mori is on the floor of his office.
You let out a string of curses, putting the file back where you found it, locking the cabinet and putting the key back before darting to the other side of the desk. You mask the confusion and nerves rattling your mind and body with an irritated expression just as the door opens.
“… ggest that you take some time to rest, Chuuya-kun. Physically, there is nothing wrong with you.”
You look over your shoulder, eyes meeting Mori’s as you frown deeply. “You’re late,” you say. “I’ve been waiting here for ten minutes.”
“Ah, apologies, I’m afraid young Chuuya-kun has spent the past twenty minutes following me around with nonexistent health issues,” Mori replies with a thin smile, purple eyes carding over you before he looks around his office curiously, as if he knows you’d been up to something but doesn’t know what. Chuuya cringes next to him and gives you a withering look, he opens his mouth to protest but Mori is speaking again before he can get anything out. “What did you want to discuss?”
“I’ve been keeping an eye on the situation in Vladivostok,” you say, eyes following Mori, waiting for him to sit down so you can. You watch as he glances around his desk, as if trying to figure out what you’d been doing before he showed up. You almost smile when his eyes narrow after coming empty handed. “I think it would be in our best interest…” 
As you sit down across from Mori, you slip your hands behind your back, giving Chuuya a thumbs up, letting him know that his humiliation was not in vain.
Step one, complete. June 19th.
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“I will never fucking forgive you for that,” Chuuya hisses when the two of you finally leave Mori’s office. “Never. That was humiliating.”
You snort. “It was pretty bad.”
“Fuck you,” Chuuya snaps. His face is still on fire, has been for the past twenty minutes as you explained your plan for the new organization rising to power in eastern Russia. “Well? When is his birthday?”
You cringe and Chuuya is instantly glowering at you. “Don’t even tell me you didn’t find it. You gave me the thumbs up. I’ll-”
“No, I got it,” you say dismissively. 
That’s not what you’re cringing over—you’re cringing for two reasons: 1) his birthday is less than five days away and you have no idea how the two of you are going to figure something out before then, and 2) the reminder of Dazai’s file, its misplaced location and the blacked out information where his name should have been, the alias labeling what you thought was his real name.
Your lips part to bring it up to Chuuya, but you hesitate because you don’t know if you should. The last thing you want to do is upset Dazai because you let something out that he didn't want anyone to know.
“Well?” Chuuya demands. “What is it?”
“June 19th,” you say, watching as Chuuya blanches. “Yeah, I know.”
“What the fuck are we supposed to do in four days?” Chuuya hisses, grabbing your shoulder and forcing you to look at him. “I don’t even know what that bastard would want.”
You’re just as lost, grimacing as you rub the back of your neck. “I don’t know,” you admit. “Dazai never really… wants for anything.”
You stare ahead listlessly, leaning against the elevator wall as the two of you head down to the first floor. Dazai likes playing video games, but he gets bored of them quickly. His room is stacked with games he’s played once and then tossed to the side. He likes crab, but you’re not going to get him canned crab for his birthday. He likes suicide, and you’re pretty sure a new edition of that wretched book of his came out, but you also don’t want to get him that for, well, obvious reasons.
“Maybe we can get him a pet crab?” Chuuya frowns.
“He’ll kill it,” you dismiss, “and then he’ll spend months whining over it. And blaming us.”
“Fair enough.”
The elevator door slides open as the two of you reach the bottom floor, and you watch as the subordinates meandering about incline their heads toward the two of you as you pass by. You only absently wave them off, mind racing as you try to figure out what to do for Dazai’s birthday. Crab, suicide, video games—what else could Dazai possibly like?
You think the only other thing is-
Oh. Oh. You have an idea.
A smile spreads across your face. “Chuuya,” you say, relieved, “I have the best idea-”
“There you guys are,” Dazai’s familiar voice rings from the right, and immediately, Chuuya gives you a sharp, panicked look and you shut your mouth, stiffening. “I was…”
Dazai trails off, and you briefly shut your eyes, because wow, that was entirely unsubtle. Dazai’s smile is more strained now and the shine in his dark eye fades, the palpable excitement withers away in a matter of seconds.
Fuck.
“I see,” Dazai says, voice cool and withdrawn. “You guys are busy. It wasn’t important anyway.”
“Dazai,” you call after him, taking a few steps, but the boy has already whirled around, stalking off the way he came. He ignores your call of his name. “Shit.”
“He totally took that the wrong way,” Chuuya says, as if that wasn’t obvious.
“How astute, Chuuya,” you say dryly, chest tight as Dazai disappears around the corner.
“You know, for someone who brags about not needing anyone, he’s pretty fucking sensitive,” Chuuya notes.
“Don’t be a fucking asshole, Chuuya,” you snap at him, but the redhead only shrugs carelessly in response.
“It’s the truth. Anyway, what was your idea?” 
Even with the weight of Dazai clearly being upset heavy on your chest, the reminder of your idea for his birthday still causes a sly smile to spread across your lips.
“You’re gonna love this.”
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Not only was Dazai upset, but he was upset enough that he hasn’t come back to your apartment in three and a half days. You figure he must be back at his shipping container, or maybe staying with those other friends of his, but you feel lonely without him. It��s weird not coming back to your apartment to find him lounging on your couch eating your favorite snacks; it’s different when he has missions and can’t be here, right now? He’s choosing to not be here, and that makes you feel gross and uncomfortable.
You feel bad, and no matter how many times Chuuya tells you to look on the bright side—that you guys can plan his birthday without him constantly hovering, figuring out what the two of you are doing—it just makes you feel worse. 
You’re sitting in your apartment waiting for Chuuya when the elevator bings, signaling someone coming up to your apartment—and considering there’s only two people who the front desk let up without your explicit permission, and one of them is still dealing with issues at one of the ports, which flooded from all of the rain the past few days, there’s only one person who it can be.
Your eyes widen as your head snaps up, looking to the elevator as the doors slide open, revealing Dazai fumbling with something in his jacket as he steps out. He doesn’t even notice you until you rise to your feet, and when he does, he’s instantly guarded. 
“You’re supposed to be on a mission,” he accuses, voice low.
You’re a bit hurt that Dazai only showed up to your apartment because he thought you wouldn’t be here but you mask it with a tilt of your head and a curious expression.
“I am on a mission,” you say, and it’s not a lie—the mission is finalizing the plans for Dazai’s birthday, step two starts in four hours and you need to confirm things with Chuuya before it begins. What awful timing, you realize mournfully, because you do want to smooth things out with Dazai but right now you can’t afford to. “It’s one I can do at home.”
Dazai makes a dismissive noise in the back of his throat, gaze focusing on the folders laid out in front of you. Closed, luckily, you’d been skimming through one but you got bored while waiting for Chuuya and decided to scroll on your phone.
“I only came to pick up my other jacket,” Dazai finally says, voice still cold and distant—you hate it.
Your eyes track down to Dazai’s coat, noticing the blood that’s dripping from it onto your wood floor.
You cringe, but then extend an olive branch by asking, “Want me to throw it in the wash?”
Dazai hesitates, a reluctant expression crossing his face but he nods, slipping it off his shoulders and padding over to you slowly, handing it to you carefully so as to not get the blood on your couch. Your fingers brush his as he does and your throat spasms a bit.
Dazai draws back quickly, but then he looks down at the files in front of you, and then back to you and asks, “… Want help with that?”
Shit.
This is Dazai’s olive branch, and you have to reject it. Because then he’ll realize this is no mission, and all of the plans for his birthday will go to waste.
“Nah,” you say easily. “It’s fine. It’s quick, where were you heading out to?”
Dazai looks a little put out by your rejection, but he doesn’t look too bothered, so he probably took your lie as truth.
“Bar Lupin.”
You roll your eyes.
Dazai gives you a dirty look.
“I don’t know why you get so jealous about them,” Dazai says pettily, obviously trying to get a retaliatory dig in for whatever wound he thinks he received the other day. Your eye twitches at the accusation. “I knew Odasaku before you.”
You pause at that.
Does Oda know Dazai’s real name? You’re hit with a wave of vicious jealousy, and faced once again with the back and forth you’ve been dealing with the past three days—do you really know Dazai? He’s always hid a lot from you, you knew that, but to realize that you only know him by an alias… You don’t understand it—is it by choice? Does he just no longer want to associate with that name? If that’s the case, then you don’t even want to ask and make him uncomfortable. 
But what if it’s not? What if Dazai Osamu is just a fake persona he’s built to hide his real self? You doubt he’s a spy, Mori would obviously know but… if it was Mori that forced him to take on a new name and identity? If he wants to let people in but can’t? You remember all of the times when you ask him things and he stares at you as if he wants to answer but doesn’t know how.
“You shouldn’t think too much, your small brain will implode.”
“Fuck you.”
Drawn from your thoughts, you glare at Dazai, who only gives you a simpering smile in return, eye regaining that little bit of shine it’d lost when he ran into you and Chuuya that day. Then he hesitates again and you raise your eyebrows.
“I’ll call things off with Odasaku and Ango? … You picked out that movie last week, we never watched it. We can watch it after you finish up?” His voice is quiet, uncertain and you feel like a cunt, because you have no way of saying no without being a cunt. 
You’d already told him that the mission wouldn’t take long, so you can’t use that as an excuse. You think maybe you should just call off tonight with Chuuya, meet at his apartment later on to try to get things for dawn, when everything is to take place. It would be risky, you don’t know if you can pull off such an elaborate scheme with such little preparation and Dazai, of all people, as the target, but you think you’d rather risk that then say no to him right now. 
Your lips part to agree, mind already racing trying to figure out how to get all the folders out of here before his nosy ass can peak at one of them, but you’re interrupted by your elevator binging. Again.
Oh, fuck.
Dazai stills as his gaze cuts backward, eye sharp as the elevator doors slide open and reveal an irritated Chuuya, soaked up to the waist and covered in mud.
“Fucking hell,” Chuuya seethes. “I’m never helping out at the ports again. They’re fucking incompetent, I-”
Chuuya pauses when he sees Dazai. Dazai doesn’t budge. For a split second, not a single one of you dares to move. You can see the quick cogs within Dazai’s mind turning as he pieces together an answer—why you didn’t accept his help, why you took so long to respond. Dread piles in your stomach as you try to figure out what to say only to come up empty-handed. For someone known for a quick tongue and sharp brain, you always somehow find them failing you when faced with conflict with Dazai. 
Finally, Dazai breaks the silence with a cool smile and a mirthful look in his eye, glancing back at you.
“That’s why you wanted me out of here. Okay.” He leaves no room for questions, doesn’t even bother to go into his bedroom to grab his other jacket before stalking forward and entering the elevator Chuuya just came out of, not even acknowledging his partner before smacking the button to the first floor.
“Dazai!” you call after him, taking a few steps toward the elevator but he only turns his chin as the doors slide shut. You shout after him angrily, “And you say I’m the jealous one!” but you doubt he even heard it.
“That bastard has the worst fucking timing ever,” Chuuya says as soon as he’s gone, unperturbed.
You give Chuuya a withering look, wanting to curl up on your couch and die. So you do that. The weight on your chest that had only just finally started to relieve itself from you returns with a vengeance, and you suddenly feel like you want to cry, unsure of how everything has gone so wrong the past few days when you just want to do something nice for him. You tuck your knees to your chest and wrap your arms around them, placing your chin on top of them.
“Relax,” Chuuya says, tossing himself onto the couch next to you; you don’t even have it in you to be annoyed by the water and mud, shoulders slumping as he tosses an arm around you and lets you lean into him. “It’ll be fine. Blockhead won’t even know what hit him tomorrow. C’mon, let’s get this finished so we’re ready to go.”
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“… You want us to… kidnap the Demon Prodigy?”
Your subordinates stare, expressions pale and aghast as they share looks with one another. You stand resolute, head held high, and Chuuya raises his eyebrows next to you. Your eye twitches at the moniker that follows Dazai everywhere.
“That’s what we said, yes,” you say, frowning. “Was I unclear?”
“No, hime-” You roll your eyes at yet another one of Mori’s ghastly titles.
He must find it quite amusing, pleased with himself every time he watches you turn green with disgust when he insists on using the term. Even worse, it seems he’s somehow managed to coax your subordinates into using the shitty moniker too. The old man must really enjoy pissing you off, he’s certainly very skilled at it. 
Your lip curls up in irritation when your subordinate continues.
“It’s just-what if-”
“You will not be punished for targeting an executive,” you say dismissively. “I’ll make sure of that.”
“We fear that the Demon Prodigy will… draw his gun when threatened,” the man continues, grimacing as if trying to choose his words carefully. You don’t recognize him—you think you should probably get to know your subordinates better, you’ve left most dealings with them to your partner, Itou… who you also have to get in contact with for this plan to work. You wince, realizing you still have much more to do within the next few hours. “How should we proceed if he does?” 
“Dazai probably will.” You stress his name, giving the man a withering look. To his credit, he winces and looks away. “But he will also be drunk, and slower, taken off guard, so you will… Well, I suppose you wouldn’t have the advantage over even a drunk and surprised Dazai, but there are more of you, so there’s that.”
“Way to inspire confidence,” Chuuya mutters dryly.
You shrug, “I’m not going to delude them before sending them out. They should be prepared to take a bullet or two. Hopefully nonlethal—you have bullet proof vests.”
“You’re fucked up,” Chuuya snorts, before turning his attention to the dozen or so gathered subordinates. “There will be minimal risk, and remember, nobody is to know about this. Nobody. Not even the other executives, or the Boss.”
“Especially not the Boss,” you add. “For the next day and a half, you’re relieved of duties. Go back to your families, or get shit-faced drunk, but don’t come back to headquarters. Under any circumstances. Clear?” 
The men exchange looks with one another, uncertain. “And if he draws his gun?” the man prods again. 
You share a look with Chuuya from the corner of your eye. “He’s not to be injured,” you finally say, voice firm, not leaving any room for doubt. “Under any circumstances. Inject him with this, you’ll be fine.”
You pull from your pocket a sedative that you’d pocketed from Mori’s office before, dangling it in front of them, waiting for one of them to reach out and take it. When they do, you lean back on your heels and look at them.
“This has to be successful,” you tell them, finally starting to feel the pinpricks of anxiety run through your chest the closer it gets to go-time. Dazai is so mad at you right now, and if this fails, it’ll make things ten times worse. Failure isn’t an option—it never is, but especially not now. “I won’t accept anything less.”
“Yes ma’am,” one of your subordinates murmurs and the rest echo, half of them look as if they’re marching off to their death and you absently make yourself a note to give them a big bonus this month. “Can we at least know why we’re kidnapping the De-Executive Dazai?” 
You smile. 
“It’s his birthday gift.”
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Dazai is in a bad mood.
Oda watches curiously as the boy downs his seventh (eighth?) drink, wondering if he should tell him to slow down. From the corner of his eye, he sees Ango cringing, lips parted as if to speak but then reconsidering as he shakes his head and takes a sip of his own alcohol, looking thoroughly concerned. Dazai hasn’t said a word since he showed up two hours ago in a foul mood, and every time Oda opens his mouth to ask, Ango gives him the sharpest look and Oda instantly shuts his mouth.
“I think the slug is dating-” Dazai finally speaks, voice rough, right hand clenched around his glass of whiskey. It’s as if he can’t even bring himself to say the words and Oda’s eyes narrow as he studies him, trying to figure out what’s wrong. “I think the slug is dating… her.”
Her. He must mean you. You’re pretty much the only ‘her’ that Dazai ever refers to—goes on about you nonstop whenever he gets a few drinks in him.
“That’s nice,” Oda says without thinking, until he sees the horrified look cast his way by Ango. “That’s awful.”
“It is awful,” Dazai agrees with a hiss. “It’s awful. I hate it. It’s disgusting.”
Oh, Oda realizes, a bit more amused, grateful that Dazai is too busy glaring into his drink to see the smile that curls to the corner of his lips. Oda had suspected that Dazai has a crush on you just from the way he talks about you—going from long winded rants of how agonizing you are to live with (as if he doesn’t actively choose to live with you) to wistful recounts admiring your missions (although those quickly shift into rants, as if Dazai catches himself yearning and has to make up for it by acting like it never happened). 
Oda and Ango realized that Dazai was obsessed with you months ago—back before the Dragon’s Head Conflict even ended, not long after you showed up, actually, when he first started talking about you. Oda assumed that it was a kiddie crush that he’d grow out of, but here he is a year later, just as infatuated—if not more so.
Cute.
“What-” Ango begins only for his voice to waver, glaring at Oda when he sees the smile on the man’s lips. He sighs, pressing his fingers to the bridge of his nose before retrying. “What makes you think they’re dating?” 
“The other day I went looking for them and I found them together, and I was gonna ask them to go to the arcade with me, but as soon as they saw me, they got all stiff and uncomfortable like they didn’t want me there.” 
Dazai almost sounds hurt by it—words strung out a bit long, lips curved down. It’s not often that Oda gets to see him act like the sixteen (seventeen now? Oda realizes he doesn’t even know the boy’s age and makes a note to ask) year old that he is, and while it’s unfortunate that this one is stemmed by him feeling rejected by his friends, he also can’t help but smile at it. Which Ango catches from the appalled look that the other man gives him.
Oda smothers the smile again instantly.
“That doesn’t mean that they’re dating,” Ango begins, trying to be reasonable, but is cut off when Dazai tosses him a sharp glare.
“And then,” Dazai continues, “I went home before because I thought she was going to be on a mission, but she was there working on it, and I offered to help her with it so she could finish faster, but she said no. And I didn’t think anything of it, but then I said I was going to reschedule with you guys for another day so we could watch a movie, and she didn’t respond at first, and I thought that was weird, and then guess what? The slug showed up. She was blowing me off to hang out with him.”
Wow, Oda thinks to himself. That’s a lot to break down. 
Home. Oda is careful this time to not let his lips quirk up into a smile but it’s impossible to hide the fond look in his eyes as he looks down at a sulking Dazai, who has slumped over the bar top, absently playing with the spherical ice in his drink. Oda has never heard Dazai refer to anything as home before. His shipping container had always just been the shipping container, and up until, well, today, your apartment had always just been your apartment. Ango catches the wording too from the way his eyes widen a bit.
And then on top of that, Dazai? Offering to help someone with work? Oda thinks there’s a better chance of fire raining from the sky. Oda is realizing that this really is more than a kiddie crush—not that Dazai would probably ever acknowledge that. Oda wonders if he should help him get there. 
“That doesn’t mean they’re dating,” Oda finally says, taking a sip of his drink and ignoring the way Ango gives him a side eye, focusing instead on how Dazai turns his head to the side to look at Oda. If Oda didn’t know any better, he’d say the boy is pouting. “They might be planning something for you, don’t want you around for it. You had that mission recently, didn’t you? The one everyone said would fail?”
Oda realizes, a bit too late, that if that is the case, he just ruined the surprise and silently apologies for it. But Dazai doesn’t seem to take him seriously anyway, rolling his eye as he returns to bouncing the ice in the glass.
“Yeah, right,” he says dryly. “No one does anything like that for me.”
Oda purses his lips, not responding, and Ango sighs as he looks away. Oda tries to figure out what to say, testing some words on his tongue but they all feel wrong.
Finally, he chooses to just be blunt. “Why don’t you just tell her how you feel?”
The noise Ango lets out is all but a whimper, he buries his face in his hands as if to disappear. Dazai’s gaze cuts to the side, head turning slowly as he focuses on Oda.
“What?”
Oda thinks maybe he should stop talking, but he doesn’t, naturally. “Y’know—you could just tell her how you feel,” Oda repeats, seeing the way Ango is shaking his head frantically but he continues anyway. “Telling her would save you from doing this once a week.”
“There’s nothing to tell,” Dazai says icily, taking a tone that he rarely uses with Oda as he pushes himself off of the barstool and turns to leave. “I’ve had too much to drink. I’m heading out for the night.”
Dazai doesn’t wait for either one of them to say goodbye as he all but storms out of the bar. Oda sighs, taking a sip of his own drink.
“That could have gone better.”
Ango slaps the back of his head hard.
“I can’t stand you sometimes.”
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“Alright, it’s time.”
You watch the live CCTV cameras from the sleek black car you and Chuuya are huddled in. Your partner, Itou, sits in the front seat, rubbing his temples as he spares you guys a short look. You raise your eyebrows at him but he only shakes his head.
“I don’t know what goes through your head sometimes,” he tells you, tired. “I want no part in this beyond this right here.”
“You’re no fun,” you say, squinting at him, “and we still need you to get the footage from the headquarters.”
Itou sighs so heavily that you think he might be trying to expel his lungs from his body. He glares at you from the corner of his eye. “Nothing beyond that. You’re insane for this. You’re going to get us all thrown in the torture chambers.”
“Relax, don’t be so serious. It makes you ugly. You’ll be fine,” you complain, focusing back down on Chuuya’s laptop, straightening as Dazai finally comes into view on the screen. 
You and Chuuya exchange an excited look with one another, a smile twitching onto your lips as you wait for the scene to unfold. You pointedly ignore the noise Itou makes when he notices how thrilled the two of you are at the prospect of kidnapping Dazai—but Itou doesn’t get it, he doesn’t know Dazai. Dazai will love this, and he’ll love it even more when you get your hands on the footage of Mori’s and Kouyou’s reactions to the kidnapping.
You’ve got your subordinates disguised impeccably as members of a low-rung gang that’s been trying to make moves into the northern wards of Yokohama. You had a meeting with them a few days ago to determine whether they’d be worth absorbing or if Mori should just send Dazai and Chuuya to deal with them. You decided on the latter, and the two of them are supposed to go in and exterminate them next weekend.
You figured they would be the perfect cover to pose as Dazai’s “kidnappers.” They’ve been aggressive and violent in Port Mafia territory, making increasingly larger steps into the Naka Ward. You were honestly curious to see how far they’ll try to go, but you doubt Mori will let it get any farther than he has already anyway, so you thought you might as well get some use out of them to stage a realistic-looking kidnapping.
You think Mori will probably assume this was intentional at first when he gets the report. He’ll call you and Chuuya, the two of you will act bitter and angry as if you’re not on speaking terms with Dazai currently—which, you suppose it’s for the best that he stormed away from the two of you that day in headquarters, because it’ll make it seem legit—you’ll hang up and tell him that you’re busy for the night, tell him not to bother you again. 
When Mori realizes that neither you or Chuuya know what’s going on, he’ll start to get suspicious. He’ll seek out the tapes and see Dazai drunk and lost in thought wandering home, see the way he genuinely struggles against his “captors” before being knocked out—none of the casual arrogance he usually has when getting himself captured by the enemy—and then? Then, you don’t know how Mori will react. You assume that he’ll call you and Chuuya again, get the two of you on it, but by that point, your phones will be off.
You’re giddy as you, again, focus back on the screen, watching as Dazai meanders down the street. His movements are slow and unsteady, and your giddiness fades when you see the downcast expression on his face. It’s hard to tell from the footage, but he’s clearly bothered about something. You wonder if he’s that pissed about what happened earlier, or if something else happened with his other friends—he’s usually at Bar Lupin for at least another two hours.
“Okay,” Chuuya says into his earpiece. “Begin stage one of the operation.”
“He looks kind of upset, doesn’t he?” you murmur when Chuuya takes his fingers off the button on the earpiece.
Chuuya rolls his eyes. “He’ll be fine.”
You ignore the curious, knowing look that Itou gives you through the rearview mirror and instead tunnel your vision onto the laptop screen… although you find you don’t really want to look at that either. You grimace as your subordinates finally make their move—and it’s testament to how lost in his own thoughts he is because Dazai hardly notices what’s happening until they’re on him.
He goes for his gun instantly, but your subordinate—Kirishima, you learned his name was—is quick to disarm him, knocking the gun out of his hands and reaching for his arm. Dazai is still swift on his feet, nimble even with a dubious amount of alcohol in him. He’s able to worm out of Kirishima’s grip, darting backward. The expression on his face is lethal, gaze cold as he tries to assess his situation, and you watch as the realization that he might be in trouble finally hits.
Just as Kirishima is about to motion for two of the others to go for him again. Dazai slips his phone out of his pocket and dials a number.
“Fuck!” Chuuya spits. “If he calls the Boss-”
But Dazai evidently did not call the Boss, which would have been the smartest decision on his part considering Mori would have gotten one of Verlaine’s special ops units to him within a max of three minutes, because after a second, your phone starts ringing.
Oh.
You stare at it, heart lodged in your throat, unsure of what to do.
“Shit,” Chuuya says, just as caught off guard. “I didn’t think he’d call you. You can’t pick up.”
You shoot Chuuya an accusatory look. “I have to pick up,” you hiss. “He called me when he actually thought he was in trouble. I can’t just ignore him, that’s fucked up.”
“We staged the kidnapping, it’s already fucked up,” Chuuya snaps right back, “and he can read your ass like a book. If you pick up, that bastard will figure out it’s us.”
“Chuuya,” you bristle, ready to ignore him and reach for your phone but he’s quicker than you, arm darting forward to grab your phone before throwing it out the window. You stare at him horrified, “Chuuya!”
You think you might throw up when you watch Dazai take one last glance at his phone before an unreadable expression crosses his face. He elbows one of them hard in the gut to get away, but Kirishima is on him with the sedative before he can make a run for it. Dazai grimaces when he feels the pinprick in his neck, and you finally look away when he slumps over onto the ground.
“Don’t start feeling bad now,” Chuuya says, glaring at you. “What did you think would happen?” 
“I don’t feel bad,” you lie, and when Chuuya gives you a doubtful look, you sigh and say, “He just looked so…”
Human. 
He looked surprised, uncertain—it’s rare for Dazai Osamu to be caught off guard by anything. You think in the year or so that you’ve known him, you’ve only ever seen him genuinely thrown off like this once, and it was when the Colonel’s operation against the Bishop’s Staff went haywire during the Dragon’s Head Conflict and you got caught in the crossfire, captured by the enemy.
You’ve always been of the belief that Dazai is one of the most human people you’ve ever met. You’ve fought people over it, you’ve fought him over it. The issue is that he’s also ridiculously intelligent, likes to portray himself as inhuman, be it to intimidate his subordinates or enemies or to fulfill whatever fucked up image he has of himself, you don’t know, but he’s good at it. It’s only when he’s put into situations like this, where he’s got no shot of keeping up his mask, surprised and trying to push away the rising panic when he realizes that there’s no way to think, talk or fight his way out of a situation, that you really see his humanity. It’s stark compared to his usual demeanor, almost palpable.
You sit there simmering in your own thoughts until Kirishima knocks hard on the window to the car. Dazai looks small in his arms—he’s tall, but thin and lanky because he doesn’t eat properly no matter how much Chuuya belittles him for it and you try to get him to eat. His frame is small, and it’s especially apparent without his coat to create the illusion of a larger stature, when his face is lax, visible eye slid shut as he lays limp and unconscious in his arms.
You push open the door and Kirishima bends down to shuffle Dazai into the car with you. His body slumps against you, head falling onto your shoulder and you push your lip out a bit as you reach up to brush his hair out of his face.
“The sedatives?” Chuuya asks, leaning around you to focus on Kirishima.
Kirishima lifts the empty syringe, glancing at Chuuya before focusing on you. “Are we free to go, hime?”
You scowl at the nickname but you nod, more focused on shifting Dazai into a comfortable position. “Go get drunk or go to your families, I don’t care. Don’t come back to headquarters ‘til Monday, but be there early, we’ve got a mission.”
“Yes ma’am,” Kirishima replies, inclining his head to you before shutting the car door and leaving.
As soon as the door shuts, you sigh and let Dazai’s body fall over, head resting in your lap. He looks so completely at peace that you almost forget that it’s because he’s been drugged. He never sleeps well, even now that he’s staying at your place—you hear him wandering around at night, restless, and the few nights he does sleep, he seems to be plagued with nightmares. You rest your hand on his hair and absently brush your fingers through his damp locks before turning to look at Chuuya, who’s watching you with an expression nothing short of judgmental.
“What?” you demand.
“Nothing.” Chuuya rolls his eyes. “How long do you think the sedative will last?” 
“It’s a pretty high dosage,” you say with a frown, looking down at Dazai. “But Dazai’s got some mutant metabolism. Remember when he walked off a whole ass horse tranquilizer during Dragon’s Head. I give it like four hours max.”
“We need to get moving then,” Chuuya sighs, and you nod.
You lean over the center console and give Itou a sweet smile, careful to not jostle Dazai around too much.
“I’ll drive you there, but then I’m gone,” Itou sighs, giving you one last warning look before he puts the car in drive. “Don’t involve me in this any further.”
“Thank you, Itou,” you coo, sharing one last look with Chuuya before letting out a sigh and turning your attention back down to Dazai, gaze lingering and a soft smile on your face.
Chuuya makes a noise of disgust in the back of his throat.
You ignore it.
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The beach house the two of you have usurped for the weekend is nicer than you could’ve imagined. You don’t know how Itou found it for the two of you, maybe a friend of his—you’ve found that he has friends everywhere, it’s been quite handy for when you have to deal with politics—or maybe he killed someone for it, you really can’t be sure with him. It’s a neat little place south of Higashikoiso, a little over an hour out of Yokohama—the house is near a cliff overlooking the sea, with an easy path down toward the beach.
There are only three bedrooms though, which is unfortunate considering you and Chuuya plan to coerce Dazai’s other friends into showing up. You might not be the fondest of them for petty reasons, but you think Dazai would like that, so you’ll bite your tongue and suffer through it. Either way, three or four people are going to have to share rooms depending on the set up and you’re fully intent on not being one of them; you already have your argument that you’re the only girl in the house and you think it will be solid enough, unless Dazai decides to be stubborn. 
“This is kind of fucked up,” you note while setting the scene.
Dazai is still unconscious, it’s only been an hour and a half so you should have some time before he wakes up, but you want to get this done as quickly as possible, because you don’t want him to wake up while you and Chuuya are halfway finished to setting up the room to make it look like a ransom scene.
“This is definitely fucked up,” you correct, but you’re smiling as you finish up typing the ropes around Dazai’s wrists, sitting him up in a rickety wooden chair.
You and Chuuya had dragged him down to the basement—Itou had luckily had some interrogation tools in the trunk of his car, and was not inclined to ask any questions when you asked for them, passing them over to you with the most concerned expression you’d ever seen on the nineteen-year-old’s face.
The basement looks like any average torture chamber—stone walls, damp and dingy, so it’s easy for you and Chuuya to transform it into an acceptable backdrop for your picture. You adjust Dazai in the seat again, fingers ghosting over his neck from where his head is falling forward, hoping he’s not too uncomfortable.
“This is your idea,” Chuuya shoots back, tilting his head to the side with a frown as he examines the scene. “He’s not roughed up enough. We’ve gotta do something, did you bring makeup with you?”
“No,” you admit, rubbing the back of your neck before an idea pops in your head.
You slink over to Chuuya and grab the knife that he carries at his side, ignoring the perturbed look on his face as he instantly takes a step away. Making your way back over to Dazai, you grimace as you cut the palm of your hand, smearing some blood on Dazai’s face and shirt to make it seem as if he’s been roughed up. You readjust the ropes, tighten them a little more and make sure some of your blood drips down onto the floor above where Dazai’s face is hanging before you take a step back to admire your handiwork before turning to your accomplice.
“... Do you have the burner phone?” you ask Chuuya, wrapping your hand with cloth, figuring you’ll just bandage it up later. 
He rolls his eyes. “Obviously.”
“Take the picture,” you tell him, stepping out of the way to hover over his shoulder, watching as Chuuya squints his eyes and tries to angle it properly so Dazai looks as in bad shape as possible. 
When he’s finally satisfied, he looks to you. Your lips curve up, “I’ll read off the number of that friend of his, you type it in. This’ll get them here for sure.”
As you do that, Chuuya starts snickering, clearly as entertained by this whole situation as you are. “You’re fucking psychotic for this, y’know?” he says, typing out the message to be attached with the image before pressing send and tossing the phone away.
“You helped me,” you accuse, but you're grinning, giddy again as you grab a towel to wipe the blood off of Dazai, pulling off the ropes and forcing Chuuya to help him back to the couch where he can be comfortable.
“Yeah, but it was your idea, you crazy bitch,” Chuuya tells you again with another snort. “What do we do now?”
“Wait.”
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Everything happens at once.
Sakaguchi Ango and Oda Sakunosuke get to the beach house much sooner than you thought they would, and Dazai starts stirring an hour earlier than you expected—mutant metabolism, you think again. Luckily, it all happens at around the same time, so you get to see all of their reactions at once.
Neither Sakaguchi nor Oda have made a move into the house, probably trying to figure out the best course of action. Dazai still hasn’t woken up, curled up on the couch while you and Chuuya play cards at the table in front of him, sitting cross-legged on the floor. You’re winning, of course, and Chuuya is becoming increasingly more frustrated from the way he keeps slamming his cards down onto the coffee table.
“They’re about to come in,” Chuuya says, giving you a withering look as tosses his cards across the table—another losing hand. You give him a smug smile and Chuuya bares his teeth at you. “Come here.”
You sigh as you shuffle over around the table so that he can put his hand on your shoulder, ready to activate the Tainted Sorrow in case Sakaguchi and Oda come in guns blazing. On the couch, Dazai starts to shift, a low groan escaping his lips, and your eyes draw back to him, focusing on his face and the way his brows are furrowed and his lips are turned down.
“Here they are,” Chuuya hums, lips quirking up into a sharp smile. “Ready?”
“Yup,” you agree, popping the ‘p’ as you lean back on your hands and stare at the door. “How long do you think it’ll take them to actually open the door?”
“I give it five more seconds,” Chuuya snorts, and you shiver when you feel the familiar sensation of the Tainted Sorrow spreading across your body, an impenetrable barrier to protect you from whatever may come your way.
Just as Chuuya predicts, five seconds later, the front door is kicked open. You frown, hoping that they didn’t break it off of the hinges, because you don't want to hear Itou bitching about it later on. Oda Sakunosuke comes in first, gun steady and finger on the trigger, but the man is cautious and tilts his head to the side when his eyes fall upon you and Chuuya.
“What is it?” Sakaguchi asks from behind the other man, taking a step into the beach house to follow Oda’s gaze to you and Chuuya. “I-what?”
“Sakaguchi,” you say, lifting your hand to wag your fingers; maybe you’re a bit petty when you don’t acknowledge Oda. “Long time no see. I was grateful for your help when dealing with Nishiki and his cronies.”
“I, ah, hime-” You sigh at the moniker, eyes fluttering shut. “What is… going on? We got a picture and a…”
Sakaguchi trails off when he sees Dazai stirring on the couch, and you turn your attention toward him. You watch as he finally lifts his arm to rub his eyes, sluggish and slow. After a split second passes, you notice him stiffen, as if remembering what happened, and his eyes shoot open, cold and sharp.
You smile. “Good morning, Sleeping Beauty,” you coo. “Took you long enough.”
The icy mask slips away into genuine confusion, his brows furrow and his lips part. Next to you, Chuuya snorts, “Now, that’s a fucking sight. I almost want to take a picture.”
“What…” Dazai begins, then notices Oda and Sakaguchi still standing near the front door, blinking a few times. “What is going on?”
You’re sure that must’ve been the most painful question for Dazai Osamu to ask—admitting he has no idea what’s happening. Chuuya snickers and Dazai shoots him a contemptuous look, diluted by the fact that he still looks half out of it from the sedative.
“Yes,” Sakaguchi asks dryly, “what is going on?”
You smile proudly and then say, “We kidnapped you. Seemed pretty realistic, didn’t it? Bet you didn’t see that coming.”
Dazai blinks, you can see him trying to force his brain to start moving faster so he can put together the puzzle pieces you’ve handed him. His gaze calculating and lips tight. “You… set up the kidnapping?”
Oda then says: “See. I told you they were planning something.”
“Planning a kidnapping,” Sakaguchi sighs, tired. “Did you guess that too, Oda?”
“Well, no.”
Hardly listening to Oda and Sakaguchi’s bickering in the background, you keep your attention on Dazai, who’s watching you with an unreadable expression on his face. You waver for a second, wondering if he’s mad at the two of you—you’d figured it could be an issue, that he might be put off by being kept in the dark about this. He really does hate not knowing things. 
“Why?” Dazai asks quietly, and you note how Oda and Sakaguchi share a look with one another before quieting down, waiting for your response.
“I’m glad you asked!” you say brightly. “It’s your birthday present!” 
You relish in the way the room goes quiet. Dazai’s dark eye widens, taken off guard for the second time in a matter of a few minutes. You’re even more gleeful when you see how Oda’s expression shifts into one of surprise, how Sakaguchi draws back, stunned. At least your fears of Oda and Sakaguchi knowing more about Dazai than you go unfounded.
“Yeah, shitty Dazai, say thank you,” Chuuya goads, a smug smile on his lips.
Dazai doesn’t respond, staring at the two of you with yet another indecipherable look, an odd shine to his dark eye. You feel a bit exposed under his stare, wondering what he could be thinking.
“How did you know?” Dazai finally asks, and oh, you realize that’s not the question he’s asking. Dazai knows that there’s only one way the two of you figured out his birthday—his file in Mori’s office. What he wants to know is which of you got hands on it.
“It was a grand plot,” you say, tossing your hair over your shoulder as you look up at him. “Chuuya kept Mori distracted while I ransacked his office looking for your file… part of your gift is going to be the recording of Chuuya trying to distract him. It was quite funny.”
“Hah?!” Chuuya demands, whirling on you. “That wasn’t part of the deal.”
You ignore Chuuya, keeping your gaze trained on Dazai instead, trying to figure out what he’s thinking. Is he angry at you? Upset? It’s impossible to tell from the heavy gaze he has laid on you, thousands of conflicting emotions swirling behind the black of his eye. Your tongue darts out to wet your lips, chewing the inside of your cheek as you wait—god, only one person evokes this type of nervousness in you and you swear he enjoys it.
After what feels like an eternity, Dazai finally lights up, flinging his arms out to his side, a wide, borderline facetious smile painting his face as he says, “So, I get an entire day to order you guys around to do my bidding.”
“Hey!” Chuuya shouts, equally incensed by Dazai’s words as he is by yours, head snapping to look at him. “That’s not the fucking gift, bastard.”
“What’s the plan then?” Oda asks curiously, and then adds, “... I’m glad you brought us here… as unconventional as the method may have been.”
You notice Dazai gives Oda and then you a curious look, but before he can ask, Chuuya is leaping to his feet, talking quickly as he waves his hands around, making subtle digs to get a rise out of Dazai, but Dazai is more focused on you.
You push yourself to your own feet, trying to ignore Dazai’s lidded stare and focus on what Chuuya is saying but it’s hard, especially when you see Dazai standing from the corner of your eye. He’s still a bit unsteady, movement slow and sluggish, and you’re sure that’s the excuse he has for when he meanders a few steps over to you, dropping his chin on your shoulder. You don’t dare to turn your face to the side to look at him, his lips brush your ear as he murmurs:
“Talk later?”
“... ‘course.”
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Luckily, later doesn’t come for a long while. Chuuya was insistent on going out to the beach—you think he was more eager to see Dazai wear the ugly Hawaiian shirt that the two of you had brought along for him more than anything else, but he quickly found interest in the large waves coming in from the sea, running back to the beach house to seek out the boards that you’d found in the basement.
Dazai doesn’t go in the water, but you think he’s having a good time considering there’s a shine in his eyes that’s rarely there. Right now, he’s sitting in the sand in front of Oda and Sakaguchi; the former listening to Dazai ramble on about whatever he’s talking about, the latter tapping away on his computer and occasionally nodding along.
You spend most of your time watching Chuuya cheat at surfing, using his ability to keep him on top of the surfboard as he seeks out the biggest waves. You’re standing in the water yourself, no further than knee-deep because you don’t want to get your clothes and hair wet. You’re kind of annoyed that Dazai’s been spending all of his time with Oda and Sakaguchi when you and Chuuya were the ones who did all of the work, and again, you can’t help but wonder if he might be mad at you. He didn’t seem to be on the walk down to the beach but you can honestly never know with him.
You drag your gaze from where Chuuya is hooting and hollering as he catches another big wave, rolling your eyes when you see the red emanating around his feet and the surfboard, so you can look back at Dazai. He’s stopped talking, listening to whatever Oda is saying instead as he stares at you with a contemplative expression. You feel distinctly seen beneath his stare, lost as to what he might be thinking. He doesn’t even notice that you caught him looking, or if he does, he doesn’t care.
You shake your head when you hear Chuuya coming toward you again, turning your attention back onto him.
“Did you see that one?” Chuuya demands, exhilarated, board tucked under his arm as he brushes his hair out of his face. “Did you?”
“I did,” you say dryly. “It would’ve been much more impressive if you hadn’t been cheating with the Tainted Sorrow.”
Chuuya looks scorned. “I don’t see you getting out there to try,” he scowls, lifting his chin. “You’re more preoccupied with staring longingly at shitty Dazai.”
Your face heats up, you kick the water at him and make sure it gets in his face. “I am not,” you hiss. “Don’t be annoying, Chuuya.”
“I give it another ten seconds before you look back at him again,” Chuuya croons, a wide smile on his face that you have half a mind to slap right off.
To make it worse, you do feel an itch to look back at him now. Your eye twitches as you force yourself to keep looking forward at Chuuya just to make a point, but an odd feeling starts to stir in your gut when you see the way Chuuya’s gaze keeps darting behind you, looking increasingly more pleased with himself.
Finally, you give him an accusatory look before turning your head over your shoulder sharply to where Dazai had been with Oda and Sakaguchi only to find-
That he’s not there?
You hardly have enough time to register what you’re looking at before you see a rush of movement from the corner of your eye.
No-
All you hear is Chuuya’s wild laughter and the sound of the ocean waves reverberating through your skull as Dazai tackles you back into the water hard. The water cushions your fall as your back finally hits the sand. You lift your hand to press your palm against Dazai’s face, pushing him away from you, lungs burning and decidedly soaked as you push yourself out of the water, gasping for air.
“Dazai!” you shout, throwing yourself at him with every intent to throttle him. 
Dazai tries to dodge, but is too busy wheezing over laughter to actually do so. He lets out a dramatic cry when you wrap your arms around his shoulders and successfully knock him into the water face down. He flails dramatically, arms and legs kicking as you hold him down beneath the water.
When you finally drag him back up above the surface, he inhales a lungful of air before giving you an indignant look. “You can’t do that,” Dazai shouts, pointing at you. “It’s my birthday.”
“I’ll do it again,” you shout right back, hair sticking in your eyes and clothes clinging to your skin from the seawater. “I wanted to go into town after this.”
Dazai looks just as messy—the cheap Hawaiian shirt you and Chuuya had got him is drenched, and the colors are bleeding into his bandages, making the previously pristine whites become a colorful swirl of oranges, blues and pinks. He looks like a shitty attempt at a watercolor painting. The bandages around his eye look especially uncomfortable from the way his visible eye keeps twitching and immediately your anger fizzles away into amusement.
You share a look with Chuuya that Dazai instantly catches, looking suspicious and alarmed.
“Chuuya, go get the camera.”
Dazai doesn’t even wait for another word. He instantly turns on his heel to bolt back to the beach house, but you’re chasing after him in an instant.
“Chuuya, go!” you yell again as you lunge forward, fingers curling around Dazai’s ankles to make him faceplant back into the water.
You scramble forward to straddle his waist to keep him in place but he worms out of your hold, trying to make another break for it but fails because you’re still clinging to his leg, dragging him back down with you. Distantly, you think you should’ve gone for the camera while Chuuya kept Dazai in place.
“Chuuya’s right,” you spit out. The two of you are out of the water now, you can feel the sand in your shirt and grating against your skin as you roll around with him trying to keep him still. “You really are like a slimy, slippery fish.”
“You can’t do this,” Dazai screeches. “It’s my birthday. It’s my birthday!”
“I got it!” Chuuya shouts from over by the chairs, racing back over to the two of you. 
“Took you long enough,” you yell right back at him, realizing that you’re going to have to sacrifice your own dignity to get Dazai in this picture, otherwise he’s going to try to run away again. 
Chuuya can hardly hold the camera straight through his snorting, and you’re sure you probably look equally as embarrassing as Dazai. There’s sand on your face, in your mouth, in your hair, in places where sand definitely shouldn’t be, but at least you don’t look like a kaleidoscope. Dazai lets out a pitiful noise when he realizes there’s no escape, trapped between your arms. He tries to hide his face in your neck, probably for plausible deniability that it’s an imposter trying to make him look bad, rather than it actually being him himself.
“Say cheese, mackerel,” Chuuya mocks.
“Fuck you,” Dazai complains.
But you can feel the smile twitching on his lips against your skin.
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Oda and Sakaguchi set up a fire later that night. 
Well, by Oda and Sakaguchi, you mean Oda while Sakaguchi sat there and played dictator, telling him how to make a campfire that Oda clearly already knew how to make from the way he seemed to be hardly listening to the man.
Dazai and Chuuya are off trying to figure out how to use sparklers, which you think is a bad idea. You think the two are more likely to set each other on fire than actually use them properly, which is why you’re staying far away, tapping away on your phone near the campfire, relaxing under the sea breeze.
Itou: everything going ok?
You almost roll your eyes before responding with.
You: Yes. Why?
Itou: just curious :p
You: Could’ve stayed if you were curious. We offered.
Itou: yeah, maybe if u wanted to find me dead in a ditch. ur boy hates my guts.
You’re grateful that no one is around to see how you let out an embarrassed puff of air at how Itou refers to Dazai, instantly clicking out of his messages to see what other messages you have. Before you can, you feel a presence hovering above you and look up, raising your eyebrows.
Oda Sakunosuke stands next to you, studying you curiously, and you look to the side and then back toward him, unsure of what he wants.
“Yes?” you ask slowly. Sakaguchi is still sitting closer to the house, scowling as he bats away bugs.
“This is nice. What you did for Dazai,” Oda says simply. “I haven’t seen him this happy in… well, ever.”
A bit embarrassed, you shrug. “It’s whatever,” you say awkwardly. “Just happy it all worked out.”
“I don’t think Dazai’s ever had someone do something like this for him before,” Oda admits. He’s not looking at you anymore, fond gaze trained behind you to where you can hear Dazai and Chuuya arguing about how to use the sparklers. “He never told Ango or I his birthday… or anything personal about himself, really. I’m grateful that you brought us along.”
You wish you could sink into the ground and die, knowing that if it was up to you, you never would have invited either of them but forced yourself to for Dazai’s sake. Again, you shrug, and say, “Was for Dazai. Thought he would like it.”
“Well, I’m grateful anyway,” Oda says dismissively, looking back down at you. “You should stop by the curry place where I take Dazai every once and a while. The kids I brought in stay there, Sakura is the only girl, I’m sure she’d like having another girl around to talk to.”
You blanch. “I don’t-uh-I don’t know if that would be the best idea, I’m not exactly… a good influence for kids.”
Oda shrugs. “Maybe not conventionally, but you’re tough. Work ten times as hard as any of the others in the upper ranks of the Mafia to keep your position. It’s impressive. If Sakura was even half as strong as you are when she grows up, I’d be proud of her.”
Your lips part to speak but no words leave them. You think, maybe, that this is the first time anyone has ever acknowledged this. Your position has never been as secure as anyone else’s—you think maybe that it’s part of the reason why Mori is so insistent on people using that stupid fucking title, as much as you hate it.
Your own subordinates respect you, the rest of the upper echelon who know of your contributions do, but everyone else? Hierarchy is absolute and the Boss’s orders are paramount, but when subordinates see a chance to push themselves higher up the ladder, it’s like sharks with blood in the water. Without a powerful ability like Chuuya’s, or a mind and presence like Dazai’s, as a girl, you’re on the lowest rung, the first one they’re circling to try to get ahead.
You prevent gang wars, keep the government off the Mafia’s ass, but that’s all behind the scenes—none of the lower ranked mafiosos see any of that. They see Dazai and Chuuya bringing down entire organizations overnight. Ace bringing in billions of yen. Kouyou’s perfect record of assassinations. Hirotsu leading the Black Lizards. Akutagawa and his ability. All they ever seen in you is-
All they see in you is a seventeen-year-old girl who happens to be favored by the Boss.
Although you don’t necessarily care for Oda’s presence, even if only for petty reasons, you do appreciate his words. Your shoulders slump and you want to reply, say thank you at the very least, but nothing comes out. You think he notices, and being the infuriatingly kind person he is, he gives you an out. Oda Sakunosuke pats your head like you’re a dog. You give him a side-eye and cringe away from his hand, but he’s unperturbed. 
“I’m glad he has you,” Oda tells you, before wandering back over to Ango, leaving you there flustered and caught off guard.
Your gaze draws back to where Dazai has finally got his sparkler working, and for a second, you’re entranced. You can hardly drag your eyes from the bright gleam and soft smile on Dazai’s lips as he eyes follow the bright pink and gold sparks flying around as he waves the sparkler around in front of him. It’s childish, almost, innocent in a way that Dazai Osamu never gets to act.
You have to force yourself to look away from him, turning your attention back to your phone to go back to what you were doing before Oda interrupted you.
Several texts from Kouyou and Mori demanding you to pick up your phone, one concerned one from Hirotsu—you’ll have to apologize to him later—and several from an unknown number that you don’t recognize. Akutagawa? Dazai’s subordinate? You’re going to have to have a serious talk with your subordinates later about giving out your number. You click back to your message thread with Itou, pointedly ignoring the last message as you type.
You: How the hell did Akutagawa Ryuunosuke get my number?
Itou: pretty sure he threatened a couple of our subordinates, wounded one of them. i have to deal with it tomorrow. have dazai train his dog before letting him wander around unleashed.
You roll your eyes and then tilt your head back to shout over your shoulder, “Dazai, train your fucking subordinates properly.”
The bickering from where Dazai and Chuuya were arguing behind you halts, and you hear the two of them approach you.
“What happened?” Chuuya asks curiously, peeking over your shoulder at your phone. You promptly close it before he can catch sight of the other message that Itou had sent about Dazai.
Dazai comes to hover next to you, waiting for you to explain, and you tilt your head up to meet his gaze. “Akutagawa injured one of my men and threatened others trying to get my number when he heard you were missing. Get him under control.”
Dazai’s visible eye twitches. “Untrained mutt,” he spits out. “I’ll deal with him.”
You share a short look with Chuuya from the corner of your eye, wondering if you’d just condemned Akutagawa to Dazai’s violent wrath, but you’re distracted when your phone buzzes again.
Itou: check ur email.
You straighten in your seat, immediately flicking out of your messages app to your email to find one from Itou with a video file attached.
“No way,” you breathe out, excited, not having expected Itou to get his hands on it so quickly. You turn to look at Dazai, a wide smile on your face; you miss the way the irritation on his instantly fades, visible eye widening and lips parting at the sight of your smile. You also miss, in your excitement, Chuuya’s grunt of disgust. “Dazai, you wanna see your real present?”
Curious, Dazai peers over your shoulder to see the email you got. “What is that?” 
“Watch and see,” you croon, clicking on the video to show the surveillance tape from headquarters.
Instantly, Dazai seems to realize what it is, eye lighting up. “No way,” he says, half sitting on top of you in your beach chair, ignoring your irritated hiss.
“Get your bony ass off of me, Dazai,” you snap at him, but Dazai ignores you, settling down as he snatches your phone to watch the video. 
Chuuya joins him, crowding in on your other side to lean over his shoulder to watch the video. Rolling your eyes, and unable to see the video on your phone, you instead lean back into the chair and watch their reactions to it instead.
Chuuya looks amused, a sharp grin on his face as his eyes remain pinned on the video, and Dazai looks delighted, he cackles and shifts to lean forward, making you grimace when he ends up digging more into your thigh to push himself up.
“Look at his face,” Dazai screeches. “He really thinks it was real. Ane-san looks like she’s going to have an aneurysm.”
Chuuya looks back at you, smiling but there’s a hesitant look in his eyes. “We’re going to be in so much trouble when we get back,” he says, rubbing the back of his neck.
Yeah, you agree silently, more focused on the bright shine in Dazai’s eyes and the wide, genuine smile on his lips. He’s so giddy that he’s almost vibrating in your lap, and when he finally looks back at you, he looks at you as if you’ve given him the world. Worth it, though.
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Despite ardently arguing why you should be the one who doesn’t have to share a room and succeeding—forcing Oda and Sakaguchi (who didn’t seem to mind) and Chuuya and Dazai (much to their distress) to share a room instead—you find that you can’t sleep at night anyway. 
It’s almost midnight when you finally decide to wander out of the house, making your way to the path leading up to the clifftop—everyone called an early night, the excitement of the day, and the lack of sleep, leaving everyone exhausted before the clock hit nine-thirty.
The seabreeze is cool against your skin, the moonlight’s illumination the only guide you have as you make your way up to the cliff’s edge. Your hands are stuffed in the pockets of your sweats as you drag your feet against the dirt path.
You don’t notice someone sitting up there at the edge until they turn their head to the side to look at you, startled by your arrival.
“Dazai,” you say quietly, standing there awkwardly for a moment. You haven’t spoken to him alone yet, you’d meant to earlier but then Chuuya got his hands on wine before bed and that plan went out the window.
Dazai sighs whimsically when he catches sight of you. “So, hime forces me to share a room with the slug only to not even use her own room. She’s so greedy,” he whines, lashes fluttering as he looks up at you.
“Couldn’t sleep,” you tell him, making your way over to sit with him, legs dangling off the edge, swinging absently. Your thigh is pressed against the side of his, feet occasionally bumping into one another, when you rest your hands against the ground to lean back on them, your thumb brushes his. “You wanted to talk.”
Dazai lets out an unintelligible noise in the back of his throat, and you watch as his gaze turns down to his lap, an unreadable expression on his face. He’s pretty beneath the glow of the moonlight, peaceful in a way you hardly ever see him. His expression is free of the numerous masks he wears to protect himself, eyes dark but warm and full of various emotions as he chooses his words carefully.
“Hime read my file,” Dazai finally says, voice soft, almost hesitant. You catch the way his jaw tightens and untightens, the corner of his lips tightening and quivering; a subtle tell to his nerves, one that most people wouldn’t catch, but you do.
“I did,” you agree. Your own heart races in your chest as you wait for his reaction; you don’t think that he’s angry, you think you’d be able to tell if he were angry by now, but you can’t help the anxiety plaguing you.
“So, you saw,” Dazai hums, but there’s a bit of a wobble to his tone. He pointedly doesn’t look at you now, staring ahead out toward the sky and distant sea. “Aren’t you going to ask?”
“No. I figure you’ll tell me if you want. If not, it’s okay.”
It’s decidedly not okay, but you don’t want to pressure Dazai into telling you. You want Dazai to open up to you, but you don’t want to force him to, so you force yourself to be content with the fact that he’s at least acknowledging this, instead of pretending it didn’t happen.
“I can’t,” Dazai says. 
His throat bobs beneath his bandages, dark eye uncertain as he stares down to the turbulent sea. You think a storm must be coming, the waves have become rocky, whitecaps staining the horizon, crashing into the jagged rocks at the bottom of the cliff. Dazai shifts, pulling his knees to his chest and wrapping his arms around them.
“By choice?” you ask after a few moments. “Or is someone—” Mori “—forcing you to?”
“... Both,” Dazai responds after a few moments. “I…”
Dazai doesn’t finish whatever he was going to say, voice wavering. After a few minutes of silence between the two of you, he continues.
“I don’t have good memories associated with that name,” Dazai finally says, and you don’t dare to speak, hardly even dare to breathe because you don’t want to ruin whatever spurred this decision of his to crack himself open to you, afraid that if you make the wrong move, he’ll withdraw again. “... Sometimes, I miss it though.”
“That’s normal, I think,” you tell him after a moment, looking to the side to focus on him, watching the way his eyes lower at your words. “You have… better ones as… Osamu?” 
It’s your first time referring to Dazai by his first name, and from the way he inhales sharply, he recognizes it as well. There’s something distinctly vulnerable in his expression as he turns his face to you.
“I have you,” Dazai says quietly, and it’s so instant that it catches you off guard, lips parting. As if catching his own lapse in control, he blinks and then rushes to add, “And Odasaku. Ango. The slug.”
You smile a bit to yourself. “Yeah,” you agree. “You do.”
Dazai looks as if he wants to say something, his lips are parted and his gaze is uncertain. You give him a questioning look, wondering what could possibly be running through his head right now, but then he speaks.
“Shuji,” he says so softly that you barely hear him. “My name was Shuji.”
Your eyes shoot open at the admission, Dazai’s goes just as wide, as if he hadn’t actually meant to say it out loud. You open your mouth to say something but Dazai doesn’t even give you the chance to.
“You can’t use it ever, okay?” he says, voice tinged with a type of panic you’ve never heard in the boy before, dark eye filled with desperation. “Never. Not when we’re with people. Not when we’re alone. Not ever. You can’t.”
You don’t think Dazai has ever begged anyone for anything in his life, but he’s begging you now… a part of you can’t help but wonder if it’s for his sake, or yours.
“Can I say it once? Right now?” you ask quietly, swallowing thickly.
Dazai looks unsure and hesitant, but he finally nods. “Then you have to forget it, okay? You can’t ever let anybody know it. Nobody can ever know it. And nobody can know that you know, okay? No one, especially Mori.”
You don’t really like the sound of that, your gut tugging uncomfortably at the stress on Mori’s name, but you don’t want to press anymore than you have, so you agree.
With the winds howling around the cliffs to drown out your voice, and only Dazai and the stars to bear witness, you shift to face him. You reach up to cup Dazai’s cheek, fingers brushing against the bandages on the right side of his face, watching as he inhales sharply at your sudden touch. Before you can lose your nerve, you lean in to ghost your lips against his cheek. 
��Happy birthday, Shuji,” you whisper softly, pulling back to sit next to him. Your face is on fire, and Dazai doesn’t react beyond a shaky breath and his fists tightening in his lap.
Finally, instead of responding, he reaches out to grab your hand, lacing his fingers with yours. Your smile is soft, and you can feel Dazai’s fingers trembling, body uncharacteristically lax as he rests next to you.
Your free hand brushes a stray rock at your side and you turn to look at it curiously, noting the jagged edge and then getting an idea. Dazai frowns when you pull your hand from his and shift away, giving you a questioning look, but then you shift to your knees, grabbing the rock and etching your first initial into the flat rock that the two of you are sitting on. Dazai watches you carefully and when you hold it out to him, he hesitates before taking it from you.
He doesn’t do anything for a second, staring down at your initial with the jagged edge of the rock resting against the ground next to it. Finally, he takes in a steady breath before carving a ‘+ S’ right next to yours. You chew on the inside of your cheek and your eyes are a bit misty as your hand falls to trace the letters.
After a few moments, you let out another breath and settle down next to him again, a bit closer than you were before, thigh pressed firmly against his and shoulders brushing. You reach for his hand again, intertwining your fingers with his, looking up to the vast sky above.
Your lips part to speak, but the words catch in your throat, fingers tightening around his for the sparest second. He gives you a curious look and you don’t dare to look at him as you finally force the words from your lips.
“The moon… it’s pretty beautiful tonight, isn’t it?” you say quietly, throat tight as you stare up at the sky, the glittering stars and the full moon glowing above. 
You can feel Dazai’s gaze on you as he responds. “Yeah,” he breathes out. “I think if I died tonight… I would die happy.”
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Three years later on the early morning of June 19th, Dazai Osamu sits on the cliff’s edge in the same spot he did with you all of those years before, watching the sun break over the horizon. His fingers trace over the two engraved letters next to him, and not for the first time in the past two years he’s spent underground, he yearns. 
He yearns for you so bad that it makes his chest hurt, his stomach turns in on itself; he yearns so desperately that it’s hard for him to breathe without you, the thought of you weighing so heavily on his mind that he thinks the pressure of it might kill him. As he’s gotten closer to finally being able to leave the underground and join the Armed Detective Agency, he finds that he thinks more and more of you.
He wonders what you’re doing—if you’re thinking of him, if you hate him, if you’ve forgotten all about him. He can almost imagine you sitting here with him, shoulders brushing, thigh pressed to his, fingers intertwined.  He doesn’t know how long he’s spent sitting in that spot, fantasizing that you were there with him, longing for days with you and Chuuya and Odasaku and Ango that are long gone.
Before his thoughts can spiral any further, his phone rings—only one person would be calling him right about now, so he lets it get to the final ring before picking up.
“Fukuzawa-san is ready for you,” Ango says as soon as Dazai picks up the phone, waiting no time for pleasantries.. “Make your way over to the Armed Detective Agency when you can… Happy birthday, Dazai.”
Dazai doesn’t respond, hanging up the phone and letting out a soft breath. He shoves his phone back in his pocket and his eyes linger on the engraved initials, worn with time but still clearly visible, for only a few seconds longer. He pushes himself up to his feet and walks back down toward the beach house with the thoughts of you still clouding his head.
Yeah, Dazai thinks a bit dryly, chest heavy and aching as he looks back at where the two of you once sat three years ago. Happy birthday.
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fun facts!
the inspiration for this fic came from the summer vacation bungo mayoi cards with dazai, oda and ango LOLLLL
the inspiration for the "dazai osamu not being dazai's real name" comes from the fact that irl!dazai was a pen name—his real name was tsushima shuji.
i'm gonna drop some pm!reader universe lore here too. in the pm!reader universe, i decided to go with the popular theory that dazai was the previous boss's son/grandson, which is why his word held so much weight when he vouched for mori. when everything calmed down after the death of the previous boss and after most of the old regime of loyalists had been disposed of, mori had shuji change his name to dazai osamu, to shred any connection he might have had to the previously reigning mafia family, just in case more loyalists popped up. in the present pm!reader universe (from 16-22), only kouyou and hirotsu know who dazai really is.
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tossawary · 4 months
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An SI-OC / transmigrator with house husband goals as Sasuke is funny to me for many of the same reasons that I like Shen Yuan in SVSSS. A Sasuke who abruptly gave up on most of his ambitions and started trying to genuinely enjoy life would break everyone around him with shock and confusion. (And on a slightly more serious note, this could be used to explore the toxic expectations surrounding masculinity and honor in this world.)
A new element making a mess is potentially a great way to explore the canonical characters who are still there. Truly, it is SO funny to imagine how Naruto and Sakura would react to a Transmigrator Sasuke suddenly being pretty nice to them and essentially saying, "Yeah, my dream is to be the husband of a Hokage." I think this would awaken something in both of them!
Maybe Transmigrator Sasuke mostly means this as a joke. Falling in love and getting married someday would be nice, sure, being protected by an OP protagonist while he focuses on rebuilding his clan would be cool, but his current focus is SURVIVAL and this is really motivating Sakura to pick up her training and it's getting scary fast. Which makes Naruto more competitive too! Also, Sasuke enjoys the grossed-out faces and disgusted noises that young Naruto makes every time that he makes a "Oh, your dream is become strong enough to marry me?" joke. So funny!
Our transmigrator is severely underestimating what this kind and flirty behavior is doing to his teammates here. (The mental term I have for this process is "Luo-Binghe-ification".) Kakashi is on the sidelines of this, watching his student (mischievously but also somewhat obliviously) sow chaos, thinking, "Oh, this is going to be a fucking disaster of teenage love drama in five years or less. Great."
(Kakashi is also potentially thinking, "I wish I'd been in the right headspace to pull this shit on Obito back in the day. Damn, that would have been hilarious.")
566 notes · View notes
hannieehaee · 4 months
Note
Hello,how are you? Hope you’re doing well)
May I ask for all SVT reaction for their S/O who likes to touch/grab their butt randomly🙏🏻
18+ / mdi
their s/o grabbing their butt randomly
content: established relationship implied,
wc: 710
a/n: they're all obsessed with each other's butts so this would be just another tuesday afternoon to them
masterlist
seungcheol -
the same way that he looks in mock disappointment at carats whenever they look at his butt, he'd react the same when you try to touch or grab at his butt. he'd find it amusing and cute how obsessed with his ass you were, but he'd never let you know that.
jeonghan -
uses his kindergarten teacher voice to scold you any time your hands landed there, but would never actually stop you bc he loves any type of physical touch (specially if it comes from you). would grab your butt in retaliation or even yells out his usual 'eyyyy' to embarrass you any time you grabbed at him.
joshua -
teases you about it and turns it on you, calling you a pervert or calling you out for being obsessed with him. despite this, he'd never react negatively to you grabbing at him, finding it too amusing. when no one was looking, he'd do it back to you in retaliation.
jun -
gasps in shock whenever you do it, somehow never expecting it. always very sheepish about it, blushing and looking around to make sure no one saw (even when you were in private lol). too shy to do the same to you, but never actually stops you from doing it.
soonyoung -
a shy giggly mess any time you did it. kind of low-key loves it cuz he loves the attention you give him. would be too shy to do it back to you, but would feed into it every time. any time you have your hands on him is just a win to him.
wonwoo -
he has no ass there is nothing to grab at he'd be surprised the first few times you did it but would begin finding it cute how into touching/slapping his butt you were. he'd pretty much let you get away with anything bc of how into you he is.
jihoon -
he'd react the same way he does when dk tries to kiss him. he'd draw back and pull back every time, a sheepish smile on his face as he did so. would find your insistence endearing and would play around with it, groaning lightheartedly any time your hands actually landed on his ass.
seokmin -
at first he'd be very shy about it, but over time he'd find it cute and funny and even play into it. he'd even twerk for you or lean over to incite you into grabbing at it or even jokingly spanking it. at some point he'd even encourage you to do the same things, attempting to teach you to twerk (seokmin really seems to find butts funny(???) so i could literally go on forever lol)
mingyu -
acts so scandalized whenever your hands go south, gasping loudly to let everyone know what you were up to, leaving you to be embarrassed at your acts. in other situations, he'd retaliate by grabbing at your ass himself, giving you a taste of your own medicine.
minghao -
would scold you lightheartedly any time your hands made their way to his ass, tsk'ing at you and telling you to have manners and keep your hands to yourself! he wouldn't actually mean this but just play around with you by scolding you.
seungkwan -
scandalized like crazy!!! he knows he has a nice butt (everyone lets him know), but whatever happened to manners!!! why would you be so crass as to grab him there so casually, especially around others?? however, he wouldnt be genuinely bothered by it, he'd just like to be dramatic about it lol
vernon -
surprised at first but eventually just gets uses to it. he's your boyfriend so he reasons that he's there for your entertainment; for you to grab at and touch in any way you so wished. very entertained by how into grabbing his butt you were, but never actually comments on it.
chan -
he's so quick on his feet when it comes to playing around, i think he'd immediately play into it and even show off to you to get you to grab at him more, causing you both to laugh. this would become a common occurrence between you two and even an inside joke where he'd publicly embarrass you by asking you why you were sooo obsessed with his butt.
712 notes · View notes
koolades-world · 3 months
Note
Hi, I love your blog! If you want, could you do the seven demon brothers (+Solomon if you feel like) with a super kind, too sweet for their own good MC? Like, if someone came up to them and asked for the clothes off their back, MC would give them away in a heartbeat and the brothers routinely find themselves summoned to help MC solve problems for lower demons and the like? Ever since MC's attendance, the bullying problem in RAD became nonexistent because the last time someone got shoved into a locker, MC summoned Lucifer to help the poor demon out and nobody's since forgotten what the offender's entrails look like (after MC was sent away, of course.)
Sorry if I wrote a bit too much, I'm just excited with the idea lol!
hello! no worries!! of course i can :)
enjoy <3
Very sweet Mc
Lucifer
he's always there to make sure nobody is taking advantage of your kindness
but that doesn't mean he doesn't help you out of course
he's quite happy to be the reason you smile
honestly though, he wouldn't have things any other way
Mammon
at first, he thinks your kindness is some kind of front
after all, why would you just give away all of your time and resources for people you barely knew
but once he got to know you, he just realized you were just really sweet
because it's you, he helps out every time since he, even though he would never admit it, has a heart of gold
Levi
he shocked every time you summon him to help out
because why would you choose him over all of his other brothers?
what use could he be that they couldn't?
but, he grows to really enjoy it after a while and sees why you do what you do
Satan
he's got lots of connections, so he can get help to solve problems he can't personally solve
normally, he wouldn't be as helpful as he is, but he always makes exceptions for you
it's made him much more approachable to the public, especially when you're by his side
you've only been a blessing for him and he couldn't be more grateful
Asmo
of course, anything for you!
as long as he can look cute while doing it, which he always is
he loves your kindness and how you love to help out where ever you can
afterwards, he always makes a post on his devilgram, and he makes sure you're always in it haha
Beel
he's equally as kind hearted as you
so, when you summon him to help solve a problem for the betterment of others, he's on board
afterwards, the two of you always celebrate with a meal out
sometimes, it's just the two of you, but sometimes you have others with you, but either way you're both happy
Belphie
he rolls his eyes and drags his feet every time you call for him
but, he always does exactly what you ask of him and seeks you out afterwards for some praise haha
he might complain, but he's always there within a heart beat
it's funny how that works, isn't it?
Solomon
he's gladly do anything for you
and he's not afraid to let the brothers know that he's always there and ready to take their place haha
but he does genuinely enjoy helping and spending time with you
he never thought he'd get to form such a close bond with another human again, so he's going to treasure it
577 notes · View notes
godslino · 7 months
Text
GUTTER BALL | changbin first date series. one night stand to lovers.
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pairing: changbin x fem!reader word count: 5.2k genre: non idol au, fluff warnings: implied sexual content, swearing, mentions of drinking summary: a one night stand with changbin ends in pancakes and the promise of a date. the rest is history.
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chan | minho | changbin | hyunjin | jisung | felix | seungmin | jeongin · · · ♡ series masterlist · · · ♡ taglist · · · ♡
a/n: finally! the changbin chapter! i just want to take a second to say THANK YOU for all the support you guys have given this series so far. reading everyone's comments is genuinely the highlight of my day and i'm so happy you're all enjoying it. please remember that both my taglist and my requests are open, so don't be shy. once again, any and all feedback is appreciated. you guys are awesome, happy reading <3
The first thing you notice when you wake up is that this is not your room.
Blackout curtains, a lamp on the bedside table painting the walls in a warm glow, navy blue sheets that are pulled over your bare chest and—oh.
Oh.
“Fuck,” you mutter, throwing your arm over your eyes, “Fuck, fuck, fuck.”
Everything comes flooding back in an instant: the bar, dark curly hair, one too many drinks, a voice low in your ear, stumbling through his apartment door, the most ripped arms you’ve ever seen, and that tongue—
The sound of a door unlocking shakes you from your thoughts, followed by shoes being kicked off as you scramble to sit up and hug the sheet tighter around your body.
What was his name—Changbin? Changbin. That sounds right. At least from the memories you have where it was coming out in strangled moans from your throat. Which is dry, by the way, undoubtedly from the amount of alcohol and the…strain it was put through.
You don’t really have time to unpack that particular part of last night’s events when there’s a knock at the door—funny, because this is his room.
Flattening your back against the headboard, you clear your throat as best you can, “Come in.”
When it opens, Changbin’s head pops through, tufts of his hair sticking out from under a baseball cap. “Hey,” he says softly before stepping all the way in. He takes one look at you, your hands holding the bedsheet in a death grip, and wordlessly walks over to his dresser.
“I bought food,” he says with his back turned, pulling out a sweatshirt. He pulls out a few sweatpants too, shuffles through them until he finds some with a drawstring, and then turns back around to face you with the clothes held in his hand.
He looks…apologetic? Nervous? Really, really cute? That’s not a question, actually. He is cute.
You’re not sure if it’s the fact that you’re seeing him in better lighting for the first time, or maybe because you’re sober, or maybe because the only other image you have of him is when he’s hovering over your body and making you see stars, but you can’t help the little fluttering feeling that starts in your chest when he gives you a small smile.
“Your dress is kind of…I, uh…it’s ripped.”
Your eyebrows shoot up in shock at the same time you feel heat rush to your cheeks. “Oh,” is all you can say as you desperately try to remember that part of the night. Hands are all you see, big and strong, and you silently let your gaze fall to them as he moves forward to place the clothes at the foot of the bed.
“Yeah,” he rubs the back of his neck, “You can have these. They should fit you, and I don’t mind losing them. Consider it my reimbursement for ruining your dress.”
You lean forward slowly, still holding the blanket to your chest, and Changbin has to stop himself from staring at the exposed skin of your shoulder when your hair falls forward in the process. “These are—” your eyes go wide, “Balenciaga?!”
He blinks like you didn’t just name drop a brand that sells singular articles of clothing for double your paycheck. “Yeah?”
“I can’t take this.”
“Why not?”
“This costs more than me,” you say incredulously.
He moves to argue, but then a slow grin starts to spread across his face. He tones it down, minimizes it to a single upturn of the left side of his mouth. “I mean, you don’t have to wear anything. I don’t mind either way.” Changbin smirks, and you narrow your eyes.
“However,” he continues, “I would really, really like to see you in my clothes.”
🎳
“He gave you a what hoodie?” Felix’s voice is distant on the other end of the line. The clicking of his keyboard stops, there’s a rustle, and then suddenly his mouth is a lot closer to the speaker than it’d previously been.
Changbin’s en suite is huge, just like his bedroom. Once he slipped out to give you privacy, claiming he was going to set up the food, you’d allowed yourself to fully take in your surroundings. A california king sized bed, a walk in closet, an attached bathroom with a balcony.
You sigh, leaning back against the marble sink. Changbin’s sweats sit low on your hips, his hoodie all but swallowing your figure into the material.
“That’s not the point, Felix. Were you even listening to me? An entire five minute monologue about how I’m in his house and all you care about is the Balenciaga?”
“Does he have any, like, really hot friends?”
“Felix.”
“Wait. Is he really hot?”
“Felix!” you bring a hand to your forehead, using your thumb and middle finger to rub at the spots just above your eyebrows. “You’re not helping here.”
“Okay,” Felix says, his voice low, “It’s just that I’m having an issue seeing what the problem is.” You pinch the bridge of your nose to fight the oncoming headache as Felix rambles on.
“This guy brought you back to his place, rocked your world, and then what? Cuddled you? Bought you breakfast? Gave you his clothes that are worth more than my car and is now waiting for you to come out of his bathroom and enjoy a nice meal? And that’s bad because…?”
“You know what? I’m hanging up.”
“The hell you are! I left my fucking fortnite match for this! You’d better go out there and—” You slam your phone down on the bathroom counter, the sound echoing. If Felix wasn’t going to validate your very unnecessary nerves, then so be it.
You stare at yourself in the mirror, unfamiliar with the person looking back. It’s a little jarring, the sight of you in someone else’s clothes. A man’s clothes, no less.
It’s been a long time since you’ve had anything close to this sort of…intimacy. Hookups are normal for you, sure. But the mornings after are usually never more than a hurried goodbye as you gather your things and haul ass out the door. Most of the time you don’t even stay, sobered up enough after your post-coital state to slip out into the night and call an uber.
Your memory had come back in full as you were slipping Changbin’s clothes on once he left the room. The sex was great—amazing even. But afterwards, when he turned over and slipped an arm around your waist and hooked his chin on your shoulder was what really scared you.
Okay, maybe scared is an exaggeration. You aren’t scared, it’s just been a while. So what if you don’t crave male validation? Sex is the fun part anyways. Dating doesn’t necessarily go well for you, and feelings are definitely off the table when it comes to hookups. Because that’s all it is: a hookup. Changbin is no different.
You give yourself a total of thirty more seconds before braving a step out into the hallway, sheepishly peeking around the corner.
The apartment is unsurprisingly huge as well: a high ceiling, intricate marble flooring, a chandelier hung in the center of the living room that reflects the sunlight coming in from the floor-to-wall windows on the opposite side.
“Woah,” you say to no one in particular, walking into the dining room area, “This place is intense.”
Changbin looks up from his phone. His hat is off now, a mop of curls sit messily on his head, thick-rimmed glasses are situated at the tip of his nose, his arms—straining against the fabric of his black t-shirt—rest heavily on the table. You watch as he lets his eyes travel the length of you, painfully slow, something unreadable behind them.
“Food’s ready,” is all he says with a smile.
You sit down across from him, eyes wide. It’s like he bought out the entirety of an IHOP while you were asleep. There’s pancakes and waffles, hash browns and toast, an assortment of fruit, two different omelets, two cups of coffee, and at least five different types of syrup options.
“Are we…” you trail off, meeting his expectant gaze, “…expecting other people?”
Changbin nervously scratches his chin. “No, uh, I just—I didn’t know what you liked. And you were sleeping, so…yeah. I tried to cover all the bases.”
When you don’t respond, your eyes transfixed on him, he clears his throat. “Please eat,” he says, extending a hand to gesture at the food, “Let me know if there’s anything else you want.”
“Thank you,” you say, grabbing a fork. Changbin waits until he’s certain you don’t immediately hate it and then starts to eat, too.
It’s quiet, comfortable, sounds of cutlery clinking against plates are the only thing filling the silence as the two of you try to soothe your hangovers with full stomachs. You steal glances at him throughout, watch the way his lips pout when he chews, and then shyly look back down at your plate when he catches you staring. It’s kind of sweet, the idea that he did all this despite only having met you twelve hours ago.
It should be more awkward, too. You’re going to have to talk at some point. There’s an elephant in the room that’s shaped a lot like post-nut clarity mixed with morning-after regret and neither of you are making a move to address it.
“So um, about last night…” Changbin starts a few minutes later. He looks nervous, like he doesn’t know how to vocalize what he plans on saying next.
You nod, putting your fork down. This was to be expected. “I’ll be out as soon as I’m done eating, don’t worry.” Changbin’s head snaps in your direction. “It was really nice of you to get food and stuff, so thank you. I can put my dress back on too so that way I don’t have to take—”
“What?” Changbin furrows his eyebrows, “No. Wait. I’m not kicking you out, Jesus.”
You blink. “You’re not?”
“Of course not.” He stills. “Is that how these things usually go for you?”
Well that isn’t exactly a question you planned on answering. What are you supposed to say? Yeah haha I actually just kind of leave before they have a chance to come back from the bathroom?
“I mean, is that not how it goes for you?”
The blush that spreads across Changbin’s cheeks is hard to ignore. “I don’t—uh…I don’t do this.”
“You don’t buy girls breakfast after you sleep with them?”
“No I don’t—I don’t bring girls home.” He admits.
Oh.
“So I’m…?” The first, you want to ask.
“Yeah.”
Oh.
You’ve never been in this situation before. Apparently that’s Changbin’s specialty: helping you experience things that you normally wouldn’t.
“Listen,” he starts again, licking his lips. His leg is bouncing nervously, visible through the glass table. “I didn’t intend to sleep with you last night. Not because I didn’t want to! Fuck, I—I wanted to. And it was…God, it was amazing. But I feel kind of bad, because everything is out of order and I don’t want it to seem like I’m only trying to ask you now just because I want to get in your pants again or something but like—”
“Changbin,” you cut him off, “Breathe. You don’t—whatever it is you want to say, you can say it.”
He visibly relaxes as soon as his name comes out of your mouth.
“Can I take you on a date?”
There’s a long silence that follows, one that makes you question whether or not he actually said what you think he did. It feels a little surreal, not just the situation but Changbin himself. You went into this blind, completely void of any expectations, but somehow came out of it with—
“A…date?” you ask hesitantly.
“A date.” He repeats, more confident this time. “A real one. Not just a hookup. I mean, I thought you were beautiful—still do! That’s why I approached you at first. I wasn’t expecting to come back here but we were both drinking and then one thing lead to another and your face was so close and I—”
“Okay.” You say, stabbing at a piece of pancake with your fork.
“Okay?” Changbin asks, blinking at you like he didn’t hear correctly.
“I mean,” you swallow your food, “Typically I’d say you’re just trying to sleep with me, because what guy does all of this for a girl he knows literally nothing about?” Changbin nods in understanding. “But we’re kind of past that, aren’t we? So clearly you don’t have any other motives.”
He shakes his head vehemently. “No. Nope. Definitely don’t.” You quirk an eyebrow at him, to which he visibly pales. “Wait, not like that. I just mean that I’m motivated by the fact that you’re beautiful and I want to get to know you not…anything else.”
When you laugh it’s soft, no more than a few heavy exhales out of your nose. Changbin wishes he could hear it more, could get you to open up to him. “I’m not too sure there’s much you’d want to know.” You admit.
“Well that’s for me to decide, isn’t it?”
His tone is different now, much more confident. Maybe it’s the fact that he’s more at ease with the conversation, or maybe it’s because he wants to prove you wrong. Either way, it makes anticipation stir deep in your gut. Changbin is different, a good different.
“Yeah. Yeah, I guess it is.”
“So it’s a date?” He picks up a piece of watermelon with his fork, holds it out to you in some sort of a toast.
“Depends,” you poke another piece of your pancakes and let it hover in front of your face, “Are you gonna buy more of these?”
“I could make that happen.” He smiles, and for the first time you let yourself get lost in it.
“Then yeah,” you push your hand forward, clinking the sides of your forks together, “It’s a date.”
🎳
changbin [8:30am]
for you 🥞
you [8:31am]
are you going to do this every day?
changbin [8:31am]
absolutely
what kind of a man would that make me if i didn’t deliver your pancakes in the morning?
you [8:34am]
a normal one
changbin [8:34am]
sounds boring
do you want syrup with those?
🎳
“I can’t believe you’re doing this.” Felix says, leaning against the doorframe. He watches as you adjust your hair in the mirror, a wary look on his face from where you can see his reflection over your shoulder.
It’s been two weeks since you and Changbin hooked up. You’ve texted nonstop since then, most of it just casual conversation. It’s kind of nice; you get to hear about his day, what songs he’s currently listening to, and find out that he’s one hundred percent committed to the pancake bit. You let him know more about yourself too: your job, your annoying coworkers, which one of your comfort shows you’re rewatching for the fourth time. Changbin makes it a point to text you every morning and every night. You open your eyes to a pancake delivery and then close them after answering the question of: What type of pancakes do you want tomorrow?
Today, it was blueberry. Because today is the day you’re finally going on your date—and because Changbin’s sheets (that you haven’t stopped thinking about for some reason) are blue.
“What’s there to not believe, Lix?” you ask, turning to face him.
“I’m just worried.” He says, walking forward to place both hands on your shoulders. His face is serious, eyebrows pulled together slightly in that concerned look you know too well. Felix has seen firsthand what your last relationship did to you, spent nights with you tucked under his arm as you cried it out and he shoveled ice cream into your mouth. So yeah, he has the room to be worried.
“What if you mess up and I lose my chance to be his friend so he can give me a Balenciaga hoodie?”
Record scratch. Freeze frame. Whatever the hell happens in the tv shows. You shove his arms away with a scoff, rolling your eyes when he stumbles to the side as he laughs.
“You are so annoying.”
“And you better not ruin my chances of getting with one of his producer friends!” Felix calls out as you walk towards the living room. “I saw a cute one on his instagram. Don’t know his name—there was no tag, but oh my God, I love his nose.”
“You went through his socials?” you ask in disbelief, staring at him as he bends down to rummage through the fridge.
“Uh, yeah? Had to make sure he wasn’t some sort of weirdo that could possibly turn out to be a serial killer. Please, I’m not that bad of a best friend.”
“Sure. Whatever you say.” You smile, laughing at the pout he shoots your way.
Changbin’s got his hands in his pockets when you swing the door open. His hair is even fluffier than you remember, a white t-shirt hugging his chest perfectly beneath his jacket and—the glasses. The damn glasses. Your stomach starts churning at the sight, the smallest of cracks in your reserve starting to form.
“You’re early,” you say, giving him a questioning look.
Changbin shrugs. “I was excited.”
“Sweet talking to me isn't gonna work, you know?”
“I don’t have a reason to sweet talk, I’m just being honest.” Changbin’s teeth are white when he flashes them, bright and sincere. He makes talking so easy, like he’s practiced it a thousand times. You like that.
“Well,” you clear your throat, “Where are we going?”
“You’ll see.” Changbin grins, grabbing your hand and leading you down towards his car.
🎳
Changbin, as you come to find out, is full of surprises.
First, he’s ridiculously good at driving. One hand on the wheel, the other mindlessly playing with yours where his hand rests on top of your thigh. The way he maneuvers the car is, well, it’s hot. It’s also really hard to focus your attention anywhere but his hands, especially when you know what they can do.
Second, he’s really, really silly. Most of the usual small talk made on a first date was done over text since it took so long to find a day that both of you were free, but that just made it so falling into step beside one another was that much easier.
Changbin isn’t afraid to sing along with whatever song is on the radio. In fact, he’s actually really good at singing. Well, when he’s not forcing the dramatics and belting at the top of his lungs while he pretends to romantically serenade you in the passenger’s seat. You can’t help but giggle, swatting his hand away when he makes exaggerated gestures in your direction during certain high notes.
Third, he makes your heart flutter. And not just the usual Oh you’re cute kind. No. Changbin makes your heart feel like it’s going to melt into the floor, all of your senses hyper aware of every part of him, wanting and craving more even when he’s right next to you.
He makes you laugh at unexpected times, encourages you to keep speaking if you ramble on for too long about something completely random, and his smile—oh man. Maybe Felix was right to be worried. Not about you messing up, but about you being absolutely head over heels for this guy.
By the time Changbin pulls into an empty parking spot, the two of you have settled into a natural back and forth that has your head reeling with how much fun it is.
“A bowling alley?” you ask, turning to him. Changbin turns the car off, stares at you in expectation. “You spent, like, five minutes telling me that you were taking me to the one place you feel most at home and it’s a bowling alley?”
“Woah, hold on. Are you mocking me?” Changbin smiles again, and suddenly nothing else matters.
“No I’m just—I feel bad.”
His eyebrows furrow. “Bad? Why?”
“I’m gonna, like, kick your ass at this. You know that right?” You say, chuckling.
Changbin stares at you for a moment, and then he’s laughing. A high pitched, steady trill of laughter that sends you into your own fit of giggles just from the residual joy that’s oozing out of him.
Once he’s composed himself enough, he points a finger in your direction, “Oh you are so on.”
The alley is pretty empty, the only other bowlers being at a far lane at the end of the building. Changbin takes the liberty of paying and grabbing both of your shoes, and you silently follow behind him as he leads you to your assigned lane.
“Weight?” he asks, tying his laces.
You glance up from your own shoes, watching as he shucks off his jacket. His arms flex nicely under the material of his shirt, straining against the fabric as he ties a knot.
“Huh?” you ask, not entirely present.
Changbin stands, smirks slightly. “What ball weight do you use?”
“Oh, uh, an eight please.”
He nods and disappears off towards the racks of balls, leaving you alone to scold yourself.
“Christ. Get a grip.” You mumble, smacking your forehead lightly with the palm of your hand.
It’s been a while since you bowled. When you were younger, your dad used to take you every once in a while and marvel at how good you were. That was a long time ago, when you had the time to enjoy things rather than work nonstop to keep yourself afloat. It’s kind of bittersweet being back in an alley, different circumstances but still the same familiarity.
Changbin comes back with two balls in his hands and places them on the ball rack. He glances over to where you’re keying in the names, smiling softly when he notices that you put him down as BIN.
“Ready to have all of your hopes and dreams crushed?” you ask, knocking your shoulder with his.
Changbin fakes a stumble, rubs his arm like you full on punched him. “Oh God, I don’t think I can play now.”
“Nice try sweetheart,” you scoff, picking up your ball just as the screen signals for the game to start, “Watch and learn.”
You move up to the beginning of the lane, trying to ignore the way Changbin whistles playfully when you do. The ball fits perfectly in your hand, round and smooth. One deep breath, you pull your arm back, slowly walk forward, and bend at just the right moment to send it off with a thud as it hits the lane. You watch with your breath held, hope that you’re able to prove you’re not all talk, and smile proudly when the ball goes crashing through the center pin, knocking them all out.
Changbin’s jaw is on the floor when you turn around. “Your turn, hot shot.” You say sweetly, patting his shoulder as you plop down in the seat next to him.
He clears his throat. “Alright.” He grunts, stretching his arms for dramatic effect. He lets out a loud yell, one of those Hoo! noises that people make before they’re about to do something crazy.
As he lines up to go, he turns, kisses his hand and blows it in your direction. “This one’s for you!” He shouts, winking when you hide your face in your hands out of embarrassment.
You watch as he rolls it forward, leans his body to the left when it curves way too far to the right, and then your hand is flying to your mouth to stifle your laughter when the neon pink ball goes straight into the gutter.
“Ah!” He screams, throwing his hands up and behind his head. He whirls around, points an accusatory finger in your direction, “You did this!”
“Me? What’d I do?”
“You distracted me!”
“I did not!
“How am I supposed to focus when the most beautiful girl in the world is watching me?”
“I—” you scoff, fighting the blush on your cheeks as Changbin walks toward you with a shit-eating grin, “Shut up. Stop that.”
“Stop what?” He crouches in front of you, trying to catch your eyes when you avert his gaze.
“Stop sweet talking. That’s a violation of the game rules. Cheating. You’re trying to distract me.”
“Trying to distract you or trying to get you to fall head over heels for me?”
You blink, “You don’t have to try and do that.”
Changbin searches your eyes for a long while, like he’s trying to decipher whether or not you’re being sincere. It looks on his face is one of disbelief, like it’s hard for him to be convinced that you reciprocate any of what he feels.
“Now who’s sweet talking?” He laughs.
“I’m not sweet talking, I’m just being honest.”
“That’s my line!”
“Well,” you say, standing to take your turn, “I wasn’t gonna steal your bad bowling skills was I?”
The game continues on after that. Changbin somehow manages to score three more gutterballs until you decide to take pity on him.
“Here, like this,” you say, walking up behind him. Changbin freezes when you press yourself up against his back, your hand steady on his forearm as you adjust his positioning.
“This is a little—”
“What? Don’t like it?” You giggle.
He clears his throat, “Quite the opposite, actually.”
When he sends the ball straight into the middle of the pins, earning his first strike of the night, he can barely contain his excitement as he yells, picking you up and spinning you around while you laugh and throw your arms around his neck.
It feels like floating, being with Changbin. He’s goofy and sweet and he knows exactly how to push your buttons all while making you feel as though you’re the only girl in the world. His smile is as bright as the sun and the way his eyes lock on to yours at any given point in time have you wishing you could lose yourself in them forever.
🎳
In the end, you win. It’s not a surprise to either of you, but Changbin couldn’t be bothered to care less. It doesn’t matter to him, not when he feels like he’s won the lottery every time you smile in his direction. And if that wasn’t enough, when you silently slip your hand into his as the two of you walk back to the car, he swears that he’s the richest man alive.
The feeling is mutual for you, too. Changbin has a way of making you feel like nothing else exists, not when he’s grinning at you from ear to ear and making you laugh so hard your stomach hurts. He’s unprecedented, a stroke of good luck, someone who came into your life when you least expected it.
Changbin, to you, is uncharted territory. He laughs loud and smiles unabashedly. If there’s a lull in conversation he’s not afraid to fill it with one of his many noises or silly dances. He says what he thinks and doesn’t care if it’s too cheesy or makes your cheeks turn just a shade darker with embarrassment.
Changbin is consistent; the first guy that hasn’t thrown you for a loop when it comes to figuring out who he is and what he likes. Changbin is someone you could see yourself falling in love with, one terrible pick up line at a time.
“So…” he says as soon as he walks you to your front door, “I had fun.”
You laugh, glancing down at where he has your pinkies linked on both hands. He’s so cute, everything about him. Changbin, Changbin, Changbin.
“Mmhm, it was really fun teaching you how to bowl.”
Changbin groans, leans his head against your front door. “I was under pressure.”
“That’s okay, I thought it was cute.”
“Hm. Does that mean I didn’t ruin my chances at a second date?”
“Depends,” you say, moving your hands up to clasp behind his neck. Changbin’s immediately fall to your waist, almost like second nature. Right, right, right. Everything feels right. “You could come inside and show me if it’s worth it or not.”
“Jesus,” he mumbles, “Don’t do that. You’re gonna drive me crazy.”
Changbin’s words are slow, each one more breathless than the last. It’s almost intoxicating.
“Maybe I want that.”
“Good,” he whispers, leaning down to brush his nose against yours in silent question, “Because I’ve been crazy about you since the moment I first saw you.”
When his lips finally connect with yours, you’re thankful for the grip he has on your waist that prevents you from stumbling. Sweet like the syrup he bought for you that first morning, kissing Changbin is like nothing you’ve ever felt before. It’s not hurried or messy; it’s not done with the intent of something more to be given. It’s slow, purposeful, Changbin takes his time like he’s worried if he doesn’t you might break right beneath his fingertips.
He hums softly when you tangle your fingers in his hair, pulls you closer until you’re flush against him. Chest to chest, heart to heart—Changbin holds you like he never wants to let go.
When you finally pull away, his eyes are glossy, shining with adoration. You could get used to that.
“So you don’t want to come inside?” You ask again, smiling when he bites his lip.
“Not tonight babe, it’s only the first date. I don’t put out like that.”
You scoff. “Yeah? Well you definitely put something somewhere when I was—”
Changbin cuts you off with a palm over your mouth. “What kind of pancakes do you want tomorrow?” He laughs.
“Mmrrnnf.” You say, muffled his hand. When he removes it, you push your lip out into a pout. “I don’t want pancakes—just want you.”
Changbin closes his eyes, takes a deep breath, and then lets his forehead fall against yours. “You’re making it really, really hard to hold myself back right now.”
You giggle, jutting your lips forward to give him a quick kiss. “Good, it’s working.”
He sighs. “Second date, and then maybe we can talk about…other things. But right now, I just want you to enjoy this. Let yourself settle with the fact that I really, really like you. This wasn’t just a one night stand for me, nor did I ever want it to be.” He plants a kiss on your nose, “I’m kind of, like, crazy about you.”
“Me too,” you say quietly, “About all of it. I want to keep seeing you, Bin. I want to see where this goes.”
Changbin beams. “Good.” He leans down to kiss you one last time, nothing more than a press of his lips to yours, but it’s more full of emotion than the last.
When he pulls away and starts walking backwards to head back down to his car, he feels like he’s on top of the world.
“I’ll text you in the morning?”
You nod. “I’ll be looking forward to it.”
“Good,” he says with a wink, “The pancakes are on me.”
There’s a tug in your chest at his words. It’s crazy how something so small, something so simple can make you feel so strongly for someone. But you guess that Changbin is just like that.
And when you open the door, Felix’s entire body falling over the threshold from where he was leaning against it, you can’t even be bothered to get mad.
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[tags: @palindrome969 @summergirlsmj @n1staytiny @strwbrrychannie @drhsthl @shays-library @giuliadesu @jisunglyricist @itsgghowitsgg @snowyquokka @caitxx1 @skzstarnet] **colored tags indicate my inability to link your account. this could be due to an error when you filled out the google form or you do not have tags on.
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© all rights reserved. godslino 2024. please do not steal, translate, or re-upload.
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amomentsescape · 7 months
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Can I request a Yandere Slashers with an S/O like Patrick Bateman (She is a rich narcissist, arrogant with others, always treating others as if they were inferior, but with the slashers she is sweeter, always showing affection for them)
Yandere! Slashers with Patrick Bateman-esque Reader
Slashers x Reader
Includes: Freddy, Michael, Jason, Thomas, Bubba, Brahms, Norman, Billy, Stu, Vincent, Bo, & Lester
Warnings: Some foul language
A/N: I love this request! Thank you, and I hope you like it! (No mentions of Reader pronouns in the fic itself)
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Freddy Krueger
Honestly, Freddy finds it pretty funny (like most things)
He too is an asshole to pretty much anyone other than you
So together, you make quite the duo
He won't admit it, but there are times where you're honestly kind of scary
The way you can say the most traumatizing thing to someone without so much as blinking has him a little frazzled
Even he chuckles or shows some type of emotion
But when you're both alone, it becomes a different story
It's the only time he sees you smile and really relax
To think that you'd so much as hug someone is insane, but Freddy gets to see that side to you
It honestly just makes him trust you more
Knowing that he's the only one you're actually nice to puts his mind at ease
It's even gotten to the point where he feels comfortable letting you have some freedom during the day
He's still watching, of course, but he knows he has nothing to worry about
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Michael Myers
He's probably the most similar to you out of everyone you've ever met
(It's why he became attached to you in the first place)
Seeing you say the most evil things to people without showing any emotion, and using your money just for yourself stirred something in him
And it still does
The connection was so immediate that he learned to trust you pretty quickly
He still likes to follow you whenever he gives you some "alone time"
But what originally started out as trust issues soon turned into entertainment
He likes seeing you move so confidently about your day and scaring all those around you
The way your presence alone silences a room is enchanting to him
And since he doesn't really like to go out much during the day, he gets to live vicariously through you
And when you come home with a smile and a quick kiss, it secretly melts him
You are perfect for him
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Jason Voorhees
When he first got to you, his ability to trust you was hardly there
You seemed so cold and uncaring
It seemed impossible for you to return his feelings
But over time, he began to see you show more kindness and affection towards him
He was confused and just assumed that you were trying to gain his trust so you could leave him
But then he saw how you acted when he "wasn't" around
Whatever side he got to see of you wasn't the side you showed to everyone else
Because of this, you began to make him feel special
And his walls came crumbling down the as soon as they were put up
You spoil him, in his opinion
Lavish gifts, kisses, genuine laughs, and just overall attention has Jason melting in your hands
He honestly doesn't even care if it's just an act anymore
He's addicted to how special you make him feel
Plus, there's no way he's ever going to let you go anyways
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Thomas Hewitt
It came as quite the shock when you were actually nice to him
He was enamored by you, clearly
But he saw the way to treated others as below you
It was a risk for him to take you as his in the first place
But when he noticed the little gleam in your eyes while looking at him, he knew he was locked in for good
He lets you initiate the affection most of the time, and he'll never say no to you
He even feels pretty comfortable letting you go into town and do what you want
He knows how you act around others, so there's no doubt in his mind that you wouldn't try to betray him
Plus, he loves the gifts you come home with after a day out
He's never owned anything nice before, so he truly feels like he's in heaven with you
You just can't ever act cold towards him
Even if he does something to anger you, you can't lash out
He will not hesitate to lock you in your shared room for the whole day if he sees it necessary
He likes your cold demeanor only when it's not directed at him
The moment it is, he will become immediately wounded
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Bubba Sawyer
This poor man doesn't know any difference
You could step on his face and he'd be giggling
So he barely even notices your sour attitude with other people
He just thinks you're perfect no matter what you say or do
You can literally see hearts in his pupils when he looks at you
But thankfully, you actually enjoy your time with Bubba
The simplest touch or compliment given by you has Bubba kicking his feet and blushing
And when other people are around, you could call them the meanest name in the book, and he'd just be all smiley and giddy
He really is all around innocent
However, this sweetness only lasts for as long as you stay in the house with him
If you need to grab some things from the store or want to walk around by yourself for a bit, it comes with a price
He will beg, cry, and plead with you to stay
It doesn't matter how cold and uncaring you are with everyone else, he doesn't want you going anywhere
But if you insist, expect him to be pouty and silent around you for the rest of the day
But don't worry, by morning it's like it never even happened
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Brahms Heelshire
Your calm and callous demeanor only fuels Brahms possessiveness
He loves how cruel you can be with others
And the money you have is fitting to him (having been raised a rich boy himself)
He'd prefer if you didn't interact with anyone at all, but he supposes your hatefulness makes up for that
Oh but when you come home with a big smile and arms outstretched for a hug, he becomes putty
He'll hold you for hours without so much as a motion to move
He loves that he's the only one that gets to see you like this
But just be careful
Brahms likes making up situations in his head
If he thinks you so much as blinked one too many times around someone, he will go berserk
He loves that you're cruel to everyone but him, but if he's having an off day, it's easy for him to see things that didn't actually happen
And once he has that thought in his head, it's hard to convince him otherwise
If he thinks you weren't being cold enough to someone, he will not hesitate to lock them in the house and place you right in front of them, making you do the dirty work
It doesn't faze you much thankfully, but it can become a bit annoying
Especially when your $800 shoes get blood on them
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Norman Bates
Kindness is the number one policy in Mother's book
So he really isn't a fan on how you treat other people
Treating other's cruelly and not even attempting to share your wealth is all immoral in Norman's mind
He's tried having so many conversations to you about how you should be kinder
But his voice always falls on deaf ears
You'd think he'd be sick of it by now
But the main reason he can't give you up is because of how sweet you are towards him
You litter him with affection and sweet words
You gift him with just about everything he's ever wanted
He knows it's wrong, but he's addicted to how you make him feel
Could it all be an act on your part? Sure
But he barely cares, to be honest
He knows you'll be the death of him, but he truly can't imagine a better way to go out
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Billy Loomis
He hates to admit it, but he finds it oh so sexy
You're quick with your words, and the slight raise of a brow is all it takes for someone to crumble to their knees around you
The control you have is awe-inspiring to him
And the fact that you become his little love bug at home only makes it more exciting
Seeing you go from rude and cruel one moment to sweet and kind the next keeps things interesting for Billy
He truly believes that most of humanity doesn't deserve the attention of people like you or him
You're both too good for them
With that being said, Billy's "body count" has gone up drastically since he claimed you
You're mean to someone? They deserve to die
You're a little too nice to a guy? He had it coming
Someone so much as bumps into you on the street? They'll be gone by the end of the night
He swears you're making him even crazier than before
But God, he loves it
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Stu Macher
Look, Stu is all about hating other people
As lighthearted and goofy as he is, he really can't stand a lot of people
The amount of times he's murdered some stranger over and over again in his mind is outrageous
So he gets it
But at the same time, suspicion easily arises from people who see how outwardly cold you are
He's asked you time and time again to "lighten up," but it never changes anything
Which is why he's always so astounded by how you are when you both are alone
You laugh at all of his jokes, you plant his face full of kisses, and you even share his love for horror films
How you act with him is how he wishes you'd act in public
But at the same time, he kind of likes how two-sided you are
There's a part of him that loves being the only one who receives your kindness
It just makes it taste that much more sweet to him
And to be honest, if you ever did act nice to someone other than him, his whole mind would go dark
And you'd never hear from that person again
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Vincent Sinclair
Contrary to what many people would assume, Vincent enjoys your callousness towards others
He hasn't come across many people during his life, but those he has met have always shown him nothing but disgust and hatred
Even his own brothers have ridiculed him and ordered him around like he was a slave (mostly Bo, but Lester has had his moments)
This only fueled a true hatred for most of humanity
It's a large part of the reason he set his sights on you in the first place
You stirred something in him, and he knew there was no going back from that feeling
But the way you acted around him was quite the surprise
You spoke so softly to him and touched him like you were a true angel on earth
You made him feel so special in a way that no one else had
There's no way he was ever going to let you go
It just feels so nice to have someone on his team for once
Your glare is so cold that even Bo doesn't want anything to do with you
Vincent has gotten his first taste of respect, and he only wants more
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Bo Sinclair
He's always wanted his partner to have a little fire to them
But damn, you were a hell of a lot more than just a flame
He was drawn to you like a moth, and seeing how mesmerizing yet cruel you could be was like the total package to him
Anytime you told someone off, he'd just be standing back saying "that's my darlin' right there"
And at first, he didn't want to believe that you were being genuine when you cuddled up to him or gave him a passionate kiss on the lips
He thought is was all a game, and he was happy to play
But after some time being met with this affection, he soon became convinced that maybe you actually did return his infatuation
And that opened up a whole new world
He loves to take you to a night out in the next town over, showing you off
And between the money he's stolen off of visitors and the riches you have in tow, you both splurge on each other like crazy
This is quite literally a dream relationship
And with how manipulative you could be, the wax museum was booming more than ever
He'd be dead before he'd let you leave
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Lester Sinclair
He finds your arrogance and cruelty a little unnecessary at times
But he doesn't ever push you too hard on it
As long as you're nice to him, that's all that matters
In fact, he lets you do what you want whenever you want it
You could walk all over him, and he'd still thank you for it
However, escaping him will never be an option
You're his, and your happiness is his number one priority
Just so long it involves being with him
But he grew to trust you pretty quickly
You're just so kind and loving towards him that he can't imagine you ever leaving him
It just doesn't make sense, right?
Even if you did try to leave, all you have to do is give him a big kiss, and he'd forgive you
Just don't talk to other people for too long
Even if you're saying the most hateful things to them, that attention alone is enough to make Lester insecure
If you want to spew anger at someone, he'll happily take it
Your attention is all he desires after all, good or bad
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jjunieworld · 8 months
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ot5 txt x gn!reader ⇢ their s/o having another member’s photocard in their phonecase — requested by anon, enjoy! ♡
genre: fluff, no warnings!┊masterlist
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yeonjun would start pouting his pretty lips as soon as he saw it. he come up to you and wrap his arms tightly around your waist, burying his head in the crook of your neck. “baby, do you not love me? why am i not in your phonecase?” yeonjun would then sulk, making sure to follow you around like a lost puppy until you finally sighed and gave in to changing it. his bright and beautiful smile immediately appearing on his face. he would then practically drag you to your photocard binder—most of which are him—and the two of you would pick out a photocard of his together. each time you suggested a cute one of him he would immediately start shaking his head, snatching the binder from you. yeonjun would then pick out all of his less cutesy photocards and lay them out for you to choose from. then he’d turn to you, beaming, waiting for you to pick. once you finally put it in your phonecase he’d make you take all kinds of mirror selfies showing it off.
soobin wouldn’t mind all that much, but he would be a little disappointed and displeased that it wasn’t a photocard of him. he would sigh loudly, glancing over to you and sighing again until you heard him. “y/n, do you think my photocards are good?” you’d smile warmly at him, telling him of course they are, they’re some of the best! i mean, it took you forever to get the blue hour photocard of him. soobin would then glance pointedly to your phone, shrugging. then he would sigh dramatically again, looking away to hide his smile. you would follow his gaze to the photocard of one of his members in your phonecase. “soobin… you literally have a photocard of taehyun in your wallet. you don’t see me pouting, do you?” you’d tell him. he would smile widely, dimples popping out, as the two of you laughed.
beomgyu would gasp loudly, snatching your phone from you and staring at the back of it with wide eyes. “you literally have an idol boyfriend, why is my photocard not in the back of your phone?! of all the people it’s one of my members??” you try to tell him that his member is your bias but he isn’t having any of it, arms crossed and lips in a pout. if fact, you saying that only makes it worse. beomgyu gives you the most dramatic look of betrayal you have ever seen on his pretty face. you giggle and try to kiss him, telling him that it isn’t a big deal but he just turns his head away from you. the next day you notice that the photocard has been changed to one of him instead. beomgyu acts as if the other photocard never happened, taking your phone and saying how pretty your phone case is.
taehyun would stare at you with wide eyes for a couple moments. you had just come up to him, wanting to show him a funny video you just watched, when he caught the back of your phonecase. “why is a photocard of one of my members in the back of your phone?” he would ask, genuinely curious. not even paying attention to the video you were showing him. taehyun would think it was some mistake. maybe you grabbed the wrong one? when you told him that he was your bias taehyun would stare at you again, a shocked grin forming on his face. he’d ask you if you were joking. you would say that you were and how it was just a prank, giggling at his reaction. taehyun would let out his cute laugh, side eying you a bit, but laughing nonetheless.
hueningkai would bring up the idea of the two of you decorating your phonecases together. you both would pull out all of the stickers and anything you wanted in your phone case and spread them out on the floor. you and hueningkai would spend near an hour discussing and figuring out how you’d want your cases to look. trying different layouts and such. when you jumped up to get your photocard binder, having the perfect idea of which photocard you wanted to use, hueningkai wouldn’t be able to help the grin that crossed his face. when he saw that it wasn’t one of him—“you know which photocard would look soo good with your phonecase…?”— the grin would drop. he wouldn’t even say anything about your choice, just giving you the side eye until you noticed how frequently he kept mentioning his photocards. you would laugh, changing the photocard out for one of him and seeing his pretty smile light up his face.
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taglist: @jjunberry @gothgyuu @spooksh0wbabe @beargyuuzz @kittyhyuka
masterlist┊request rules ૮₍ ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶ ₎ა
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whipped-for-kpop-fics · 3 months
Text
When they misunderstand and kiss your cheek - svt 97z
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💋Who; Seventeen 97z (individually) x reader 💋What; lil fluff reactions 💋Wordcount; 1.9k 💋Warnings; Very minor profanity.
Read the other versions here; 95z - 96z - Maknae3
-2024 Masterlist-
A/N- That's it! The last of the series! Ah, these were cute and fun to write, even if I wasn't always in the right headspace to write lil fluff pieces, I still enjoyed the process. Thank you to everyone who showed love to these, I appreciate every one of you 💖
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💋Seokmin💋 For as long as you can remember, you've always wanted to go to a photo booth with someone important to you and take some fun and cute photos to get printed on a little strip and treasure them. You don't know why exactly you want to do it so much, nor why you've never done so before when the booths are pretty common, it's just never happened. And if there's anyone you know will do it with you without question, it's Lee Seokmin. So one day you send him a mood board with a few photosets on it and tell him you want to do that with him. As suspected, Seokmin doesn't even ask a question besides "when?" A few days later, the pair of you are excitedly rushing through the shopping centre to the booth he promises you has the best filter options as if he's some kind of photo booth expert. Though he does turn out to be correct, at least as far as you're aware because there are some really cute filter options which you're excited to try. It goes exactly how you expect for a while, the two of you grinning pressed together on the bench and making funny faces and dramatic poses for the camera. Clearly, Seokmin had really paid attention to the photosets you sent him because he's leading you into some of the poses you can recall. You don't remember them all because honestly, you hadn't paid that much attention to the specific photos and just the general vibe. So you really hadn't noticed that most of the sets you sent him included some kind of cute cheek kiss photo. Therefore, Seokmin really can't be blamed for thinking you want that particular pose seeing as it featured so much. A pose you hadn't even noticed. Unbeknownst to you, Seokmin has been working himself up to this the entire time, the whole morning really. It feels like a big move, to kiss your cheek even if he's most certainly kissed most of the guys' cheeks many times. But this feels pretty fucking monumental, honestly.
You're just about to ask him if he wants to add a filter when he starts to lean in after taking a quick inhale to steady his nerves, the clicker in his right hand ready. The photo he happens to take is frankly, hilarious. He hadn't expected you to turn to talk to him right then and you certainly had not expected him to kiss you so what he winds up capturing when he presses the clicker is both of you wide-eyed and lips touching. "Uh," Seokmin starts when he gathers himself and leans back rapidly, cheeks flaming red in a way that matches yours. "I didn't know you were turning." "I didn't know you were…leaning in?" You look genuinely bewildered. "What exactly were you doing?" "Kissing your cheek?" His statement curves up into a question as your expression only grows more puzzled by his words. "Like-like the photos!" "What?" "The photosets all have a cheek kiss photo!" "They do?" He nods rapidly. "Oh, I didn't even notice." He deflates a little, well a lot really, you can see the way his embarrassment rapidly turns to disappointment. "You didn't want me to kiss your cheek?" "Well, I mean, I'm not opposed if you want to." You shrug lightly, trying to play it off as you slide your gaze aside to look at the screen shyly, though you immediately start to laugh at the large photo of you two staring in shock at each other with your lips brushing. "What?" Seokmin looks at the screen and starts to laugh. "We have to print that one." He giggles. "Our first kiss." "First?" "Uh-" He looks at you with wide eyes in alarm, he really had not meant to say that. "It's not even a real kiss." You point out then reach out to gently tug him closer by the collar of his t-shirt. "How about a real kiss this time?" "Seriously?" You nod and then can't help but giggle when he enthusiastically cups your neck with his free hand to lean in quickly. "Don't laugh." He whines. You vaguely register the sound of the booth taking photos. He's looking at you adoringly despite his whine, not that you know that yet, but you will when you have the proof in your hand when Seokmin insists on printing all of the photos you've taken. "You're so eager, it's cute." "I've wanted to kiss you for so long, sweetheart, of course, I'm eager. don't you want to kiss me?" He pouts and you're not entirely convinced it's entirely an act. "Come here, idiot." You tug him in the remaining gap to press your lips to his. Seokmin doesn't forget to press the clicker to capture your first real kiss, though he does very quickly drop it to hold your face and put all of his focus into kissing you breathless.
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💋Mingyu💋 A brand Mingyu has an advertisement deal with has sent him a package of their newest products and of course, he shares them with you as you have different skin types and the brand always sends him one of everything to try. So you're both sat on the floor in his living room, headbands on to keep your hair out of your faces and the collection on the coffee table in front of you with two little mirrors. A few minutes ago, he handed you the moisturiser that is apparently designed for your skin type, though you think something has gone very wrong with their formula as it has not dried well at all. Your skin feels all sticky and tacky to the touch, it's pretty gross and you certainly won't be using that again. Mingyu looks over when you mumble his name, his own skin shining with the drying moisturiser he has just finished diligently applying. And he finds you pouting while pressing your cheek slowly. To him, it looks like you want something and all he can think is that you want a kiss on the cheek. Although his stomach is fluttering with nerves at the sudden suggestion, he still shuffles a little closer so that he can lean over and press a kiss to the apple of your cheek. However, when he pulls back, he feels the tackiness on his lips and pulls a slightly disgusted expression while settling back into place and grabbing the packet of face wipes the company supplied. "You're sticky." He comments, tone as impressed as his face shows, which means, not at all. You stare at him for a second then nod slowly. "Yes, I am aware, that's what I was trying to tell you." Mingyu blinks at you dumbly, one hand raised to his mouth as he wipes the sticky residue from his lips. He lowers his hand a little to talk. "Not to kiss your cheek?" "Not to kiss my cheek." Immediately, Mingyu's cheeks flush with embarrassment and he directs his attention back to the mirror to wipe at his lips a little harder around a kind of muffled "oh, sorry." "It's okay," You mumble and hold your hand out. He glances at it and almost takes it into his own, momentarily assuming you want to hold hands but then he puts the packet of wipes on your palm and blushes darker. "I didn't mind." You assure softly as you turn to your own mirror and work on wiping away the product on your skin. "Oh." Mingyu tries not to grin dopily at what is essentially permission to kiss you again. As soon as you're done cleaning your skin, his lips find your cheek again, this time followed by a cute little shy giggle before he hands you a different product to try.
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💋Minghao💋 Lately, when you both have a spare few hours, you and Minghao have been watching a fantasy drama full of cute romantic tension between the two main leads. Neither of you had realised just how romance-focused the show is when you started and at first thought it might be a bit weird to watch so many kissing and suggestive scenes together, but it's not been as bad as either of you assumed. In fact, you both find yourselves playfully mimicking the actors quite a lot, it helps to remove the tension that builds otherwise. A tension that has been growing thicker and more obvious over the past months between the pair of you, both of you are aware of it but aren't sure if making a move is wise. You both value your current relationship and ease far too much to want to risk it. Though it comes to a head one afternoon when you're both sat on his couch tucked up under the same blanket with your snacks and the AC on because it's not cold at all, the blanket just feels too cosy and you're used to sharing it from this routine starting in winter. Of all the scenes to cause something to happen between you, it's a very cute one, with no suggestive remarks, and no tension on screen. The main female lead skips up to the main male lead and silently asks for a kiss by cutely pouting and turning her cheek towards him. Of course, he kisses her cheek and that's that, they share an adoring smile and go about their business. Without even thinking about it, you copy her action, pouting and tilting your cheek, just because you think it's a cute action and are used to copying the actors at this point. You really hadn't expected Minghao to be paying you any attention and to follow along. But then his lips are on your cheek and you freeze momentarily. "I think you do it cuter." He informs smoothly as he leans back and gently turns you to face him with his long fingers pressed tenderly against your jaw. Your eyes lock and despite there having been so many chances before now, so many moments full of pure tension, this is the moment that changes everything. "Can we stop pretending that we're going to be able to be friends for the rest of our lives?" "We're not going to be friends?" You reply quietly, heart thumping and certain you know what this means but you don't want to skip any scenes of your own love story. "I still want to be friends, yes, I care about you too much and love being friends with you to not be friends. But I want to be more," "Best friends?" You can't help but tease. Minghao's face drops for a second into his trademark unimpressed expression but he quickly breaks and chuckles. "Best friends and romantic partners sounds perfect to me. What do you say?" "I say it's about time." "Then can I kiss you somewhere else this time?" "Xu Minghao!" You gasp scandalised in the most theatric of ways. "We've just started our relationship and you're already trying to get me in bed, what would-" He cuts you off by leaning in and slotting his lips against yours. You giggle happily and tilt into the kiss. "Are you going to be this dramatic our whole relationship?" He hums when the short kiss breaks, brushing his nose against yours with a fond smile on his lips. "I am. Regret this yet?" "I can never regret you." And to prove his point, he kisses you again with all the months of pent-up affection spilling out to seep through your parted lips and down into your chest, filling it entirely as your own affection fills his in return.
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A/N- I think I have ruined myself with the Hao one, why did I make it so soft and sweet omg
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tac-the-unseen · 5 months
Note
JUST READ THE COD GANG REACTING TO READER FALING AN ORGASM SO WHAT IF READER ADMITS THEY NEVER HAD ONE BEFORE?????? LIKE- NEW RELATIONSHIP??????? SORRY FOR CAPS IM ECSTATIC RN BC UR WORK IS SO GOOD🫶🫶🫶🫶🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌
COD characters finding out that Reader's past lover(s) have never given them an Orgasm.
Am I exactly sure what Anon is asking? No, But I will persist.
I'm choosing to write this with the interpretation of Reader never having an orgasm even though they've had sex with others. (The other way I read it was that Reader just flat out never had an orgasm before, and I think that's extremely unrealistic. So we're going with that one) ALSO because of the prompt You and the guys have yet to bump uglies!
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Ghost:
•Simon is a little confused "Like...None of them?"
•He takes it very seriously
•He asks you to elaborate a little more. He just wants to know if the other guys sucked (or just didn't in this case) or if you two needed to do something specific in order to please you.
•He understands if you need some kind of accommodations and will ask you what he needs to do
•You and Simon have a long discussion over what you want your first time with him to be like. He makes sure you both have a clear understanding of what's to come (ha).
Soap:
•First thing he says is “Would you like to?”
•He thinks it's a little funny but really sad too
•”Darling, you're too pretty to let subpar men just use you.”
•He immediately wants to show you how it's done and what you've been robbed off
•He asks if he can take you for a “good ol' mustache ride”
Price:
•”Young men are dumb.” He says and takes a drag from his cigar
•”But I guess it's nice to know I have no competition.” He smiles
•He does talk to you about your needs and what he needs to do to meet them properly
•He takes you out on a nice dinner date, goes on a nice walk with you, and end up with his hands wrapped around your waist taking you home
Alejandro:
•Can not stop laughing
•As soon as you tell him he erupts into a fit of giggles. He takes him a full 3 minutes before he calms down enough to hug you and pat you back.
•”You poor thing.” he chuckles and kisses your cheek. “I'll make sure to make up for all their failures, Mi querida.”
•He’ll ask you what they were doing down there the whole time. Which leads to even more laughter when you tell him.
•”But I think I should buy you a nice dinner first.” he winks
Roach:
•Stunned
•Absolutely floored
•”Like never?” He signs. You can see the horror in his eyes
•He’s got his head in hands, contemplating life. He's so concerned for you. He has to take a moment of silence to comprehend the level of incompetence the men in your life must have had.
•When he finally sits up he looks you directly in the eyes and signs “Thank God I'm good with my hands.”
Gaz:
•Slowly turns his head to look at you with his brows furrowed and confusion
•Is too shock to speak
•He gets up to pour himself some Scotch
•”How many times have you had to fake an orgasm?” “8” he proceeds to down the entire drink and pour himself another
•This time he hands it to you “You need this more than me.”
Rudy:
•He gets up and takes a lap around the house
•When he gets back he pulls you into a hug
•”You deserve so much better, Mi Tesoro.”
•Kisses your jaw and runs his hands down your back. “I can give you so much better.” He tells you in-between kisses
•He offers you himself until your properly satisfied, for however long that takes
König:
•”Why do you like incompetent men?”
•He means it in a genuine way, But he accidentally reads you to filth.
•”Why spend your time and affection on someone who cannot please you?” he asks. “I didn't want to seem shallow.” You replied. “Shallow? Liebste, No.”
•He practically scolds you for allowing such men into your life. It's actually the most you've ever heard him speak. Which really tells you how upset he is.
•”You're Lucky I'm here. I will not let such things happen ever again.”
•And fuuuck, he means it
Mace:
•”Other men are filthy animals.” he tells you like it was a normal thing to say
•He gets in close to you and rests his arms on your hips. “Don’t get me wrong, I'm a man whore.” He laughs lightly and kisses you “But you knew that.”
•He asks you for all the funny details and thinks it would make a decent bonding experience.
•He tells you about his less than great sex stories and failures
•”Rest assured sweetheart, I'm a pro at making people scream.”
Thanks for reading <3
(I realize now that I wrote them all in different mindsets of this prompt... Good luck with that, I guess)
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starboye · 2 months
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pairing: ethan landry x male reader
request: Definitely Ethan (Reader boyfriend) , could do when reader finds out he’s ghostface in the end of scream 6
warnings: angst, cursing, kinda yandere ethan
you had always thought that your boyfriend ethan was the shy closeted away kind of guy, he didnt talk much to others and was the hottest nerd youd ever met, and he was very romantic.
but as time went on you found him drifting farther and farther away from you physically and emotionally, you thought nothing of it at first but then you started to find it a little suspicious so you did some digging.
you formed an investigation of your own and connected the dots to realize that ethan was ghostface, at first you didnt wanna believe it so you headed to ethans house with one thought in mind "was ethan really the ghostface killer", you arrived at the house and headed in thanks to the extra key he gave you.
you waited out in his room waiting for him to come through the door, soon your head his bedroom window open and saw a figure crawl through, lightly illuminated by the moon light, as you got ready to defend yourself with whatever you could find.
as the hooded figure stood up and took off the mask you saw it was ethan under it "ethan" you say shocked to your core "y/n?" ethan says covering your mouth as to not wake anyone in the house "howd you get in here" ethan asks uncovering your mouth slowly hoping that you calmed down.
"no the real question is why the fuck are you ghostface" you question taking a few steps back from ethan "i swear i didnt mean for you to find out this way i promise i was gonna tell you" ethan says trying to calm you "tell me what that my boyfriend that i love so much is really a murderer and killed a bunch of people" you retort.
"well when you put it like that it doesnt sound that great" ethan chuckles "nothing's fucking funny ethan" you shout "okay okay just calm down and talk to me" ethan says with a lower voice "n-no im leaving" you say tuning to the door "wait y/n" ethan says pulling you back.
"fucking let go of me ethan" you say trying to break his grip "please y/n just listen to me i-" ethan tries to explain but you kick him of of you "i loved you ethan and this is what you do to me" you say tears brimming at your eyes "y/n im sorry let me make it up to you" ethan says.
"how ethan how could i possibly get back with a murderer ethan" you say now tears running down your cheeks "cant you just fucking forgive me im sorry" ethan says pulling you into a tight hug and not letting you break his grip "i love you y/n i really really love you" ethan brokenly says.
you nuzzle into his warm embrace, remembering a time were ethan was a genuine guy, nice, cute, and your fun little nerd, not a ravenous murderer "i love you too ethan but i cant do this" you lowly say crying into his chest "please just stay with me" ethan says rubbing your back to comfort you.
"no im not falling for this trap" you say pulling out of ethans warm embrace with ouffy eyes "goodbye ethan" you say before walking out of his room, ethan watching you with a broken heart, he looks down and stares at the ghostface mask for a minute before throwing it on his bed.
you both cried your eyes out that night and both for different reason, and after the whole incident youd come home regularly to find flowers with notes or others gifts presumably from ethan trying to apologize but youd just throw them away.
no matter how many times youd throw them away ethan would just replace it with another slew of gifts, wanting you too be his forever and ever, and nothing was gonna stop him from succeeding in having you.
taglsit: @mailmango
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artdcnaldson · 3 months
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so what happens patrick is back from tour and visiting and you're all at his big mansion for a weekend and you're making art absolutely fucking miserable because you keep treading a thin line - flashing your panties to art from behind patrick so he cant see - clinging to arts arm and when patrick asks when you got so close all the sudden you giggle and arts heart nearly drops out of his ass but you just say its because hes been so helpful on campus! he even told off a bully for you! - art could strangle you, you think this is a game like patrick wont literally break his teeth if he finds out and why is that so fucking funny to you?
he ends up cornering you in a moment alone - when you're coming out of the shower and patricks doing something else - he slips into the bathroom - locks it. backs you up against the sink counter when you're in just a towel and you're so excited but art looks furious - and not the horny kind of mad he gets before he caves and touches you - the genuine anger before he cuts deep and you think 'oh shit -' before he lays into you.
Because, what the fuck? Do you think your pussy is more important than his friendship with patrick? Is that it? Are you thinking that if patrick finds out arts gonna pick up his sword and fight for you? Dump patrick for you? Finally date you? Is that the delusional little fantasy you've been cooking in your head?
You aren't the kind of girl he wants to date anyway, he says most painfully. I mean, you let him fuck your ass and slap you around - and throw your pussy at him at every given opportunity. You're not the kind of girl he'd have as a girlfriend. You're the kind of girl guys fuck before they find a woman with some fucking self respect.
It might be the meanest thing he's ever said. Which is why you're both suprised by the slap that rings out - your hand frozen in the air in shock - arts head whipped to the side from the hit, cheek already burning red from your handprint.
You want to say sorry - but art just laughs. Shoves you to your knees - "I'll show you fucking sorry - " and when he fucks your throat you know your tears are from the truth of his words as much as how hard hes hitting the back of your throat.
🥰🌈☀️💐 how life feels when tumblr user poppy-metal in my inbox
It’s two days, but he feels like he’s going insane just one day in. Every single fleeting glance you send his way, he’s sure is going to be the one thing that makes him slip up— that clues Patrick in on every fucked up thing he’s done.
But he gets set off on Saturday night, when the three of you are smoking outside in the garden. It annoys him because it was like he can’t get a fucking second alone with Pat. Like you need to be there to remind him of what a shitty friend he is. Patrick closes his eyes, leans back on a stone bench.
You’re sitting on the fountain with a cigarette dangling from manicured fingers. He sees something dangerous flash in your expression and it makes him sit up straight. You uncross your legs and reveal your bare pussy beneath the little skirt you wear, Art he takes a long drag, but can’t make himself look away like he should.
A strange, mournful tug pulls at his chest when you close your legs, hide away from him again. Your laugh rings through the air when you look at Art, when you feel the palpable want. Patrick sits up, eyes narrowed. “What’s so funny, huh?” Art coughs uncomfortably on his exhale.
You glance over at the blond, duck your head shyly. It’s all a fucking act, Art thinks. He can see you laying out every single clue for Patrick to uncover. It’s fun for you, to make Art squirm, like you have the power. And you do. You could fucking ruin him.
But you just shrug, blow smoke towards Patrick’s face, which makes your brother’s expression wrinkle in annoyance. He ashes his cigarette with a tap of his finger. “You two are pretty close now,” he notes. Not accusatory. Yet. “Do you two have fun at Stanford without me?”
Art opens his mouth to speak, to deny that he spends time with you outside of making sure you don’t get roofied at college parties. But you speak first, your voice ringing out into the air. “Art’s been really good to me at school,” you say, really laying it on thick. “He’s always taking care of me and making sure I’m happy. I can sleep in his room when I’m lonely, and he doesn’t let any guys take advantage of me when we’re at parties. He always keeps me close so nothing bad happens. He actually broke up with his girlfriend because she was being so mean to me.”
Patrick’s jaw ticks slightly, and the brunet forces himself to laugh. Art’s stomach drops, and he takes a drag to distract himself. You fucking bitch. You know exactly what you’re doing, he can read it in the fake, doe-eyed look you wore.
“That’s nice, Donaldson,” Patrick says. “Keeping my little sister happy, huh? Really nice.”
You stand up, like that was your cue to leave. So Patrick could beat Art into a pulp, drown him in the fountain, put out his cigarette on his tongue. It was hard to say. But you just stretched, stubbed out your cigarette on the stone edge of the fountain. “I’m gonna go shower before Daddy smells smoke on me,” you tell Patrick. You ruffle his hair, then turn to face Art. “Goodnight.”
Art is quiet, watches you disappear into the hedges and greenery leading back to the house. The door shuts behind you in the distance like a gunshot, and Patrick glares over at him. “What the fuck, dude?”
Art sighs, runs a hand through his hair. “She’s exaggerating,” he says as calmly as he’s able. He meets Patrick’s gaze, does his best not to wilt. “She’s just trying to convince you that she’s doing fine at school.”
Patrick’s tongue pokes against his jaw, his eyes narrowed slightly. “Whatever,” he says, shaking his head. “I fucking hate this, you know. We’re hardly even talking, but somehow my little sister knows all about your fucking college girlfriend. I didn’t even know you had one, dude.”
Art swallows, nods. “I know, I’ve just been…” He sighs. “Senior year, you know? Things will be different once I graduate and go pro like you.”
Patrick rolls his eyes, shrugs. “Yeah, sure. Whatever, dude. Night.”
Art is left alone in the garden, with the stub of a cigarette burned down to his fingers. He sticks it in a flower pot and bites at his cuticles. They’re practically raw at this point, but he’d already chewed the inside of his lip raw and achy, so he’s running low on things he can use to distract himself.
Once he sees the light in Patrick’s room flick on he stands and walks back to the house. Patrick’s parents were always weird about him wandering the place alone— like he’d steal some random clock that was a gift from a world leader, or something stupid like that. Like his parents weren’t making six figures themselves.
Whatever. You and Patrick are both fucking brats, spoiled and expecting the world to fall at your feet. Expecting him to fall at your feet. Fuck that. Fuck you for screwing up his friendship with Patrick, for making it impossible to talk to his best friend because of the guilt.
Your bathroom door is open to the hallway to let the steam curl out while you get ready for bed. When he walks past, you ignore him entirely, and it snaps something sharp and hard in his chest. He slips in, shuts the door, pins you against the counter.
You’re wearing a robe— leopard print and tacky. It falls open just slightly, and he’s greeted by a glimpse of your tits. You smile up at him, pretty and amused, expecting him to cave, to touch you the way you’ve been needing. But you know Art— you’ve seen most of his expressions at this point. Good, like when he and Patrick won the doubles tournament and you saw joy written in his face. Bad, when you got too handsy at a party and he dragged you away and laid into you.
But he was more than that, he looks scary. Your smile falls and you press yourself back against the counter so it digs into your spine. His eyes follow the line of your throat as you swallow hard, like he can read your dread in every tiny movement. He grabs your wrist, hard enough to make you yelp.
“Art, that hurts,” you whine, trying to wrestle out of his grip.
“Cry to Patrick then,” he says, and you wither. “That’s right. You don’t want Patrick to find out what a disgusting fucking whore you are, do you?” You give a weak shake of your head. “Then shut the fuck up and listen.”
Your pulse is already hammering, he can feel it thrumming where he holds your wrist. You’re all limp and pliant, waiting for the blow to strike.
“You are actually fucking crazy if you think I would ever choose you over Patrick,” he says, and you exhale sharp out of your nose. “And whatever you think is going to happen here is just one of your brainless little fantasies. If Patrick finds out what you’ve been doing, he’s going to fucking kill me. It’s going to be messy, and fucked up, and he’s going to lose his only friend in the entire fucking world. It’s going to crush him. And when that happens, it’s going to be all your fault. And for what?”
You swallow, blinking at him dumbly, unsure of what to say. Were you supposed to talk back? Were you supposed to just stand there and take it?
“I’m never going to fucking date you. You let me fuck your ass, and you suck my dick and let me slap you around, and I bet if I touched you right now you’d be soaked, but it doesn’t change anything. Because guys like me don’t call girls like you their girlfriends or wives. Girls like you are a stopping point on the way to someone better, someone who has some fucking self respect.”
The sound of the slap startles you, even if you were the one to hit him. Your hand stings where it collided with his face, where it left a red mark behind.
“Art—“ you start, eyes wide as you look at him. Your voice is watery, teary and pathetic. “I’m so— I shouldn’t have— I’m sorry, Art. Fuck, I’m sorry, I’m so sor—“
You whimper as he pushes you hard onto your knees, makes them dig into marble tile. He’s already hard when he pulls down his jeans and boxers, and you feel hot tears slipping down your cheeks.
You’d fucking hit him. You ruined everything, you were always going to ruin everything. You’d fucked him up, you made him twisted and mean and nasty. All your fault. You needed to fix it.
“You’re sorry? Fucking show me then.” He slaps his cock against your cheek, precum smears against the plush skin there. It snaps you back into reality. He rubs his tip against your lips, moves his hand into your hair.
Your heart hurts, actually hurts in a way you’ve never felt before. You wonder if you should go to the hospital, or something, but every cell in your body just says. Show him you’re sorry. Show him you’re sorry. Apologize apologize apologize.
You open your mouth, relax your throat, let him bully his cock inside. He doesn’t give you time to adjust, you try not to need it. Even when he’s slamming into the back of your throat again and again, when you’re gagging and feel drool flooding your mouth and it’s all messy, dripping down your chin.
“That’s it, take this fucking dick—“ His grip on your hair tightens and your cries are muffled around his cock. Your jaw aches from being stretched wide to accommodate him. Your face is smeared with black mascara tears, snot, and sticky spit. You look awful, you feel awful. But Art doesn’t care. He’s getting off on it. “Fucking choke on it. ‘S all you’re good for, isn’t it?”
He pulls you off, slaps you across the cheek. “Isn’t it?”
You sniffle pathetically, nod, and open your mouth wide. Show him you’re sorry. Show him you’re sorry. You let him slide back into your throat until your nose presses firm against the soft curls at his pelvis, until his balls press against your chin and they’re coated in the stringy, slick drool that spills from your lips.
Art grabs your face, holds your nose shut and blocks off your airways. Your throat constricts in panic and you look up at him with wild, frightened eyes. Nails scratching at his thighs as you feel the need for air begin to get to intense.
You can’t breathe. Arts fucking into your throat, and you’re going to puke, and you can’t breathe, and he’s going to just let you black out around him. The tears are flowing hot and fast, you keep pathetically grasping at his thighs. He lets go of your nose, but doesn’t let you pull off of him. He ruts against the back of your throat, and you’re only faintly conscious of something warm and hot shooting down your throat as your body screams for a big gasp of air.
It’s only then that he lets you pull off, with cum dripping from your lips, from your nose. You take large heaving breaths and cry as you try to wipe it all away. It only manages to smear it around your skin.
You feel stupid, but you can’t stop crying. Not because it hurt, not because you were scared and couldn’t breathe. But because what he said fucking stung.
You’re nothing more than a hole for him to use. Worse, you’re nothing to him at all. A stopping point until he gets someone better. He sees you like that, and he treats you like that.
“Stand up,” he says. His cock has hardly even flagged, and you watch him wrap a hand around himself, stroke himself standing above you. “C’mon, I’ll fuck you— I’ll give you what you want. If Patrick’s gonna find out I might as well make it worth it, right?”
You stand and grip the edge of the sink. Your head swims as you look at him. His hand moves between your thighs, probing at your entrance. The first breach of his finger makes you whimper. You’re not wet, not nearly enough.
“Art, stop,” you say, voice wobbly. “I don’t want it.”
“No? You fucking wanted it all semester.” He mouths at your throat, wet and hot, and you shake your head. “Did I hurt your feelings, baby? You need me to lie to you? Does that get you wet?”
Tears well in your eyes again, and you shove at his arm until he pulls his finger out. “Just leave me alone, Art. I won’t bother you anymore. I get it.”
He looks like he wants to say something, but he doesn’t. He fixes his clothes and slips back into the hallway.
You cry so hard that you throw up. Brush your teeth so hard that they bleed and you spit pink foam into the sink basin. Wash the mess off of your face until it’s stinging and raw.
The rest of the weekend, you rot around in bed. Keep your doors locked, pretend that you have food poisoning. You relish in the solitude and watch Lost on DVD. You make it halfway through the first season before there’s a knock on your door.
“Hey, I have soup,” Patrick calls, muffled through the door. “Doctor’s orders.”
You stand up, pad slowly to the door and let him in. Sure enough, he’s got a little tray for you. Ginger ale, Gatorade, and soup. You want to cry that he cares so much— that he’s such a good brother. He sits the on the foot of your bed and sits against the headboard.
“I’m sick, Pat,” you say once you sit back down, a feeble attempt to be alone.
All he does is shrug, press play on the DVD. “Whatever, it’s food poisoning, right? Not contagious. Lemme watch with you.”
You eat some of the soup, but your appetite isn’t there. You just sit it on the floor and curl up next to Patrick. He wraps his arms around you, lets you lean on his shoulder.
It’s only an episode later that he talks. “Did he do something?”
You freeze a bit, then redirect, gesturing to the screen. “John Locke?”
Patrick sighs, jaw ticking. “You know who I’m talking about. You can tell me.”
“What are you talking about?” You ask, feigning confusion. He gives you a look, exhales sharply. “Art? Did he give me food poisoning?”
You feel stupid protecting him still. After everything. You know where you stand with Art, and it makes you sick. There aren’t any more dreams of somehow convincing him to love you through your cunt, like your pussy is some sort of magic love potion. It feels more like poison. It ruined everything— you and your incessant greed.
But you don’t want to hurt Patrick. Art could hurt you, but he can still be good to Pat. That’s worth something.
“Not the food poisoning, just… anything. Did he do anything to you?”
You meet his gaze, and lie the way you grew up lying to everyone. “Patrick, he didn’t do anything. I don’t even know what you think he would do.“
Patrick nods, but doesn’t say anything else. He stays two more episodes, then leaves.
Art never stops by your room, which is good. You don’t want to see him, because even thinking about it makes you feel sick. You lock your door again and don’t sleep. Art leaves early in the morning to go to the airport, back to Stanford.
You transfer your plane ticket for the next weekend, text classmates to get you notes. You’d be staying home for a while.
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Absolutely obsessed with the final scene of this week’s Ted Lasso and the himbo dynamics
Van Damme and his spot on sexy painter look
Dani’s child-like disappointment at ruining the surprise
Dani’s t-shirt “borracho pero buen muchacho” (a drunk but a good boy, a very common and funny Mexican saying)
Isaac got his cousin to fix the window in the morning which means they were planning this from earlier, even knowing they’d be tired after the match
Jamie being so nonchalant about their help (cute little nod to “we are a team” in s2)
Jan Mass’s bluntness for once just sounding kind and sweet because their efforts are just genuine
Whatever the hell is going on with Bumbercatch. I’m obsessed with him. Love that everyone in the team is just as bewildered by him as we are.
Richard doing something nice but being still very French about it (not the best ones obviously)
Sam. Everything about Sam. But mostly Sam being so surprised and touched and shocked that this was all his teams idea. Sam getting to show his dad the home and family he’s found here.
Also Sam being a flirty cutie.
Richard’s adorable little dance when he comes out with the wine bottles
Jan Maas hugging Richard like THAT when he comes over with the wine and both being so comfortable with that kind of embrace
Coming being his hilarious funny self and more at ease than he’s been all season
Jamie and Dani boyfriending yet again in the background
Dani doing the cocktails (because borracho pero buen muchacho)
Everyone being so loved and happy and at ease with each other outside of a work environment, together, as a big family. A huge Christmas special call back.
I love every single one of them so damn much
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