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ashipikaur · 1 month ago

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ASHI’S 24 MANKAI CHALLENGE REVIEW! ☆

overview HERE ↑ ashi comments DOWN BELOW ↓

↑ my opinions and takes on how the a3! boys look in my style!!! 😭😭😭 and then VS how drawing them went……….. ↓

<\3 the correlations are strong on some BUT OTHERRSSSS… EEUUUUU. the banri azami was a struggle but at least it paid off 😭😭. otherwise thru out the entire process i did reviews on every chara!!! you can see my individual notes about them allllll below. and in order!!! this post will be very long HAHAHA. tho i did the tierlist after doing them so 🧍‍♂️ their rankings and numbers may not correlate……..

HARU 🌸

MASUMI 8/10

- eyes lowkey suffered me THEYRE HARD FOR ME TO STYLIZE. MAYBE IF I TOOK MORE TIME ON THEM cuz tbf these are more on the doodle side 🤔 could do them better but they’ve always lowkey been a struggle

- thought the colors would kill me BUT SURPRISINGLY NAWT. my only issue was that I was afraid his skin would be too light but ISSOK!!! was really funsies to work w

- hair is gen so peak i love his ahoge. it’s peak

- his highlight thingies have me questioning my rendering sometimes 😭😭 i can’t think too hard about them

ITARU 6.8/10

- ikemenisms are a hit or miss sometimes. HIS EYES ARE STUPID. HARD TO STYLIZE ALSO!!!!! stupey face ong

- hair is very funsies I LOOOOOOOVE DRAWING IT ITS SO FLUFFY AND RENDERING IS SUPER FUNSIES TOO

- his fit is butts tho. ITS SO DULL AND LIKE SAD TO RENDER ITS A FLOP <\3 he’d probs be better to draw in other fits but review is for this experience overall

CITRON 8/10

- WHIMSY. HOW MUCH WHIMSIER CAN YOU GET

- thing is that citron’s energy is just hard to capture…… he’s Saur ethereal…….. AND HIS EYES ARE HARD!!!!

- funsies to render tho a good chunk of detail and his hair is hard to render at times

CHIKAGE. 2/10

- IF I KILL MYSELF BLAME CHIKAGE UTSUKI.

- nothing about him is fun. HIS EYES ARE HELL. VIBES ARE HELL. HAIR IS LOWKEY HELL. CLOTHES ARE BORING!!!!! GLASSES SUCK TO DRAW 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

- he turned out fine but made me go thru hell. the cheeb is best way to illustrate chikage

SAKUYA 6/10

- his hair is very funsies. that is it

- 😭😭😭😭 LIKE HE ISNT HARD TO DRAW? BUT HES LIKE NOT THAT INTERESTING. he’s fine

- 😔 unfortche i hate rendering and drawing hoodies and his fit is a little boring. eyes can be inturrestin cuz I’m not used to drawing them saur big 🤔 uuum. YA. I DUNNO. OK

- he gets bonus +1 point because his hair is just fun to draw I LOVE FLUFF

TSUZURU 5/10

- the most mid guy to ever mid

- LIKE SAKU. NOT HARD TO DRAW. JUST THERE. tbh their vibes are both kinda hard to like show

- ????? for some reason i feel like my tsuzurus give off like a maekawa yuuki (stage actor) feel to them

- his hair isn’t fun AND I HATE DRAWING HOODIES so ya 🫶 mid

NATSU ☀️

TENMA 6.2/10

- i really wish he wasn’t this low but GOD

- i really dislike rendering jean jackets. i dunno if yall have tried but i do NAWT recommend and as much as i wuv tenma’s jacket as a concept I DONT LIKE DRAWING THE SHAPE EITHER. 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 HELL!!!!!!

- his eyes kill me everytime i draw him and his face in gen he never turns out right SORRY TENTEN

- my second fave 🧍‍♂️ i swear. plea

YUKI 4.8/10

- he causes me visceral pain

- I LIKE GENUINELY DONT REALLY KNOW WHERE I THOUGHT HE WAS MY FAVE TO DRAW ??????? BECAUSE HE IS REALLY HARD TO DRAW. IM SOAAAUUUUR BAD AT DRAWING BIG EYES and especially like the judgy eyes IM SAUUURRR BADDDD. his hair is fun if you don’t think about it too much. it killed me here

- i finally found out how to draw his collar w/o making him look stupid 😭😭😭😭 AFTER FIVE YEARS. bow is fun to draw slightly annoying to render

- he turns out cute at least. Eu

MUKU 9/10

- PEAAKKK MAYBE WHAT I USED TO SAY ABOUT YUKKI IS ACTUALLY JUST TRUE FOR MUKKUN NEOW

- his eyes are so cute. his face is so cute. his hair is SOOOOOOOO FUNSIES HIS FIT IS SO PEAK!!!! I LOVE HIS SLEEVES

- all of his colors are so nice to render i have sm fun like it’s saur funsies. quick and easy. peak

- not a 10/10 cuz his hair and skin can merge at times <3

MISUMI 8.3/10

- yessu the three is especially for him

- IVE DEFO GOTTEN A LOOOOOT BETTER AT DRAWING SUMI WITHIN THE PAST YEAR i’m actuallys satisfied w how he turns out 🫶 . the thing be that

- his hoodie kills me. REITERATING I HATE RENDERING HOODIES

- HIS HOODIE IS ALSO!!!!!! HARD TO RENDER 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 ISSODARK. SO DARK. alsos half the time i barely know how to render the yellow accents but i think I’ve figured it out neow. maybes

- i can’t think too hard about his hair or else it makes me tweak. it’s annoying to render

- good things are his eyes cuz sankaku pupils are v fun and ALSO HIS SLEEVES ARE SOOOOOOOO IM ACTUALLYD OBSESSED E THEM I LOVE THE SHAPE SM. PEAK <3

KUMON 4/10

- he’s saur. average

- LIKE. I DUNNO I THOUGHT HE WOULD BE A LITTLE HARD TO DRAW OR SMTH BUT HES NAWT HES JUST KINDA MID TO DRAW? 😭😭😭😭 he’s kinda hard to stylize but it’s just cuz i don’t like small pupils

- whiter than i thought he was. too used to fanon kumon

- YA I DUNNO HIS FIT IS OK TOO. KINDA DETAILS BUT YOU CAN SCRIBBLE IT SO I DUNNO

- ended up docking a point because his colors wacked me up

KAZUNARI. 7.2/10

- it’s been 5 years and i still don’t know how to draw this stupid twink

- IVE COME TO REALIZE KAZUNARI IS VERY. STYLIZED. LIKE IMMENSELY IN MY STYLE AND I DUNNO IF THATS A GOOD THING OR NAWT? 😭 😭 like it’s fine but I DUNNO. oftentimes i feel like he’s missing that spark………..

- his spring outfit isn’t v funsies to draw for me personally cuz it is a LOT of white and doesn’t give a lot of diverse fun colors to work w. the blue is kinda dull and he just looks kinda empty w/o the hat but EEUUU. whatev

- stockholm syndrome

AKI 🍁

TAICHI 9/10

- immensely funsies to draw I LOOOVE DRAWING HIS EYES AND HIS HAIR AND HIS ENERGY

- the chain is so peak btws. Saur peak

- only downside is that his face is ugly sometimes and I have to fix it cuz I always draw him :D

- his sweater is kinda wack to render

SAKYO 8/10

- HIS HAIR HAS TO BE DRAWN IS A VERY SPEICIFC WAY. IT LOOKS SIMPLE BUT ITS KINDA NAWT?

- glasses are a downside obvi

- SAUERRR CUUUUUUUTEEEEEEE i really wuv rendering him it’s REALLY funsies 🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶 peak colors. i really like rendering like this yellow???? shade

- lotta black/dark coloes but tbh it was fast and simple to render. it’s like a 50/50

BANRI 3/10

- i’m gyonna kill banri settsu

- HIS FACE IS FUN TO DRAW. HES FUN TO SKETCH. THATS IT. BECAUSE WE DONT FLIPPIN TALK ABOUT THE RENDERING

- rendering banrj is gen saur butts. you suffer and cave and go like ok whatever i’ll render his eyes then he looks BETTER but then his hair still looks like SHITE!!!

- FOREHEAD /NEG

- sm details on his jacket for what. AND FLANNEL. FOR WOT

- what i have realized from this expiernce is that i draw banri like a woman 🫶. take that as you will

- his eyes are his only saving point

AZAMI 2/10

- honestly braur probably the reason for the azashi drought

- 🧍‍♂️ . where do i start

- EYES ARE HELL. SO HARD TO STYLIZE AND MAKE SURE HE DOESNT LOOK LIKE A DEAD FISH.

- hair is whatever to sketch but GOD the rendering is so BADDDDDD 😭😭😭😭😭 GEN HELL. LIKE. braur

- he’s so white. i actually cpuldn’t like i needed to add like the tiniest bit of overlay color because i genuinely couldn’t

- his jacket is fun to draw but butts to render. IT GETS MUDDY REALLY FAST 😭.

- sorry azamin </3

JUZA 4.8/10

- pretty average guy

- if i draw banri like a woman i draw hyodo like a GREASER.

- his hair is really funsies but hard

- ALSOS he just comes out kinda Stiff so it knocks him down

- his everything takes me a while to sketch

- I DUNNO. both the hyodos are fine 🫶

OMI 5/10

- average guy

- HIS FAIR IS FUN. IF YOU DONT THINK ABOUT IT TOO MUCH

- outfit is fine

- i do think he looks super cute in my style tho <3 that’s about it

FUYU ❄️

TSUMUGI 5/10

- he really is just a fellow guy

- I DUNNO. HES NAWT LIKE HARD. HIS FAIR IS FUN? fun to render skin + hair wise too

- i just don’t think i captured his tsumuginess 🧍‍♂️ it could be the eyes. maybes. OR I DUNNO. it’s a mystery he doesn’t really look like Tsumu to me. he’s missing the freak my Tsumugi looks too nice IMO

HISOKA 5.2/10

- hair is a liiiittol hard to draw but it’s fun when you get it

- smol

- I HATE HOODIES. otherwise fine to render <3 hair is fun to render. again

- he gets +0.2 cuz i just think he’s cute in my style 🫶

HOMARE 4/10

- i don’t like drawing his face

- his hair would be really funsies if it wasn’t for the Long Strand

- his hair is very funsies to render and his eyes are SUCHHHH A PRETTY COLOR

- clothes suck to render

- 😭😭😭😭😭😭 homare is a lot of extreme highs and low but unfortche the lows overpower by a lil. SO. less than average

TASUKU 2/10

- hecks naw bro

- I DONT THINK HES NECESSARILY HARD TO DRAW. I THINK HES NATURALLY LIKE. THAT BUT I MADE HIM LIKE REALLY UGLY

- his hair is really fun and that’s the only plus i think everyone should draw his hair

- his fit is so boring. nawt fun at all

- INSANELY BORING TO RENDER

- hair was the only saving grace and I’d feel bad placing him at a 1 cuz that’s like REALLY bad and he wasn’t THAT bad

AZUMA 9/10

- amazing 10/10 stunning BEAUTE

- i didn’t expect him to be this high but <3<3<3<3<3<3

- i really like how he looks in my style too. everything is great and amazing

- only downside is that he face is kinda hard to capture but OTHERWISE everything is PEAK

- simple and easy to render. clothes aren’t a lot but they’re at least fun

GUY 6/10

- better than average 🫶

- his face is hard to capture but after that you’re all clear

- i like his hair!!!

- 🤔 details kinda

- i wouldn’t say fun but like. enjoyable

#this is just an ashi inside scoop so no tagging for this #enjoy!!! this is way later than it was supposed to be 😭😭😭😭😭#ashipiko draws ♪

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lovelyrotter · 1 year ago

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okay but i actually kinda wanna know ur take on stridercest being canon compliant O_O <- autism stare

oh hey i am also hitting you with the autism stare. ill try to get my thoughts down in a way that makes sense to more than just me hahaha

bear in mind that im an epilogue lover and i think Meat/Candy are really valuable pieces that further all of the characters and are also hard canon in the sense that we're looking at just 2 post-game universe outcomes out of an uncountable number (the book in the picnic basket representing post-canon fanfic). i think the characters actions in the epilogues make sense and are satisfying to me. yes even jane (i love alpha jane and i will not do her the disservice of 'cleaning her up' w/o showing her work for it. thats not how you depict a character who grew up with fascist programming). i could totally go on a whole tangent about this specifically but thats another post lol we'd be here forever and its also not stridercest

but okay. canon stridercest. under the cut cause it got kinda long

basically it has to do with the cherubs and how their relationships and mating rituals are pretty obviously incestuous leaning even though cherubs dont have the human concept of Siblings or blood family. the cherub who predominates will search across paradox space to mate with another cherub who closely resembles the cherub they predominated which is like textbook Freudian sexuality. theres a lot of Freud and Jungian stuff in HS imo even if im kinda [wobbly hand gesture] at the validity of these theories applied to real life and real people. but theyre super fun tools and lenses to use in fiction and i mean. gestures at all of dave

so the incest aliens cherubs. the whole reason why im talkin about them is bc Caliborn is so incredibly interested and invested in the Striders in particular. caliborn as both Lord English and Lil Cal shapes earth NOT OVERTLY but more so embeds himself in earth society, but again, the Striders lives in particular. dave is full of incest jokes. hes even apparently got a list of his friends arranged in order of how likely theyd incest-elope with each other (thank you epilogues for this amazing factoid). he seems to think about it often enough to, yknow, Do That. have a good solid think about that and construct an organized list about it. bearing in mind dave makes jokes about stuff thats a) bothering him, or b) generally camping out in his brain. hes not even really aware of it most of the time (as we see in one of the openbounds where hes all 'why am i thinking about puppets???' after seeing dirk for the first time in that dream bubble. he is thinking nonstop about dirk at that point and going off his only frame of reference for ANY dirk, which is his bro. his bro who was most likely deeply warped by Lil Cal)

sorry for the long blocky paragraph lol. but now onto the next thing

Caliborn as Lil Cal is the centerpiece in the beta strider apartment. dave cant escape him and beta dirk grew up with him. what the fuck do you do when youre childhood comfort item is also the most evil creature across all of paradox space? if youre a dirk you try to fight it. but how long can you keep fighting something like that. its safe to say that bro was affected by Caliborns particular brand of perversion and sfw kink. i dont think i have to say how insidious abusive and toxic he is about those things. and looking at the truth of beta bro (16yo alpha dirk) you can start to see just how warped beta bro became. beta bro is a false dirk (still a very Real dirk but not the Truth of dirk. beta bro has been toxified and made infinitely worse by an absolute evil influence over decades of life. in 80s fuckin texas. presumably in the system. anyone would be fucked up after that)

so for this analysis/theory im stating beta bro as a false persona. using jungian terms he is apha dirk's shadow

both dave and dirk live with a fake, carefully manicured version of their bros. they live with personas (or shadows of their guardians on the walls. hello platos allegory of the cave). they dont actually know e/o and they dont until the striunion

alpha dirk especially grows up embedded in the Public Persona Of Dave Strider 400 years post mortem and completely alone with unlimited internet access. hes a self admitted expert on his bro and we dont get to see a lot if any of his early childhood but i can hazard a guess at how much he clung to that persona of his bro. he fuckin idolizes dave. he LOVES dave. right off the bat he is in some kind of love with dave and i think if you try to argue against that then thats you slippin. i think youre a fool and have to reread homestuck because i wholeheartedly believe the striders loving eachother is part of the win state

once again this is speculation cause we get barely anything about alpha dave, but from what we already know about him im guessing this bro-persona is

achingly effortlessly cool

oozing masculinity (toxic or not, not really interested in categorizing that although toxic coolboy masculinity IS something the striders contend with & is an important facet in their lives)

a skilled fighter

a dedicated moviegoer (hes a director need i say more. this one is probably the only genuine thing about his on-screen persona)

and now lets look at jake. someone whos grown up on pretty much nothing but movies, whos doubtlessly been influenced by hollywood and its idea of gritty 'main character' masculinity through that, and who also clings to more old-school ideas of manliness (think victorian/edwardian era gentlemanly-but-loves-a-good-scrum kinda manly. moustache twirly with a monocle kinda manly. basically everything that grandpa harley is)

but okay lets look at what jake wants to be. lets take a look at his teenager persona

achingly effortlessly cool (his own 'hollywood star' kind of cool also def influenced by his favourite characters like lara croft who is indeed achingly cool. you see him succeed in inhabiting this hollywood star persona on earth c)

oozing masculinity (the old school manly mans-man kind)

a skilled fighter (two pistoles always. harder to aim cause you cant use a free hand to make up for kickback. that takes skill)

a dedicated moviegoer (again one of the only genuine parts about his persona. his questionable-to-wretched tastes aside. but bearing in mind that the SBaHJ movies are intentionally bad which is what makes them loop around to good. such is the nature of intentionally 'bad' art. jake fuckin lives in this perpetual bad-good art loop. okay enough with the art tangent keep focused man cmon)

because dirk has obviously way more contact with jake i dont doubt he sees through jakes own (admittedly way more flimsy) coolboy persona but the point still stands i think. different flavours but the same kinda guy. dirk has a type and i dont think its a stretch to say that hes looking for aspects of the bro-persona he grew up looking at in other boys, much like the winning cherub looking for the one they lost in the cherub theyll mate with

also wtf is with dirks obvious boner for dave chasing him across paradox space to decapitate him huh?? the last few sentences in Meat are about that very thing. he wants to fuc fight dave sooo bad. haha remember how the cherubic mating ritual is one of the most violent and long running spectacles in paradox space? i sure do

#stridercest #davedirk #dirkdave #alphacest #my t #thank you if you read all this HAHAHA #i am dedicated to my craft (autistic) (indulgent)

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notfreetoday · 2 years ago

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MPW Ep 2 Subtitle Corrections

Subtitle Corrections: Ep 1 here

Cultural/Language Tidbits: Ep 2 here

Same translation disclaimer applies. Thanks to everyone reading the first post and geeking out with me in the notes, I really appreciate it XD Ok, Ep 2, let's go! Sorry in advance for the length!

If you're wondering why Yoh's freaking out about the rainy season even though they've been together for 3 years, the manga artist posted a clarification on twitter:

By the way, “it’s been 3 years since then” – that phrase refers to it being 3 years since that conversation regarding the slave contract. As for living together, they’ve only just started (to do so) around Mar/April*, so (at this point) it’s only been a few months (for them). What if (I) got it wrong…. I remember making a note of it, but the file that I wrote it in and passed over (to the crew) couldn’t be found right, so… (was it) a dream?” *Japan's rainy season comes around June/July, so this means that this is the first rainy season these two have been experienced together.

[Y: まずっ] Y: Tastes bad In case the original "that sucks" sounds like Yoh might be talking about the news of the young forecaster - he's really just talking about the food here.

[S: 遅くなるからいらねぇっつっただろう] Original: I told you not to bother since I returned late Mine: I told you I wouldn't need it cause I'd be late right? This is actually a pretty harsh sounding line tbh. It's sort of inkeeping with Segasaki's curtness, but still pretty harsh - so this tells us he's tired after a long day, and explains the frown on his face that Yoh just wipes away with his cuteness

Nikujaga literally means meat and potatoes. It's a stewed dish and a very well-loved comfort food. Super easy to make too (link goes to an easy to follow recipe, and the site also explains a little about the dish).

[Y: 本当、顔だけはいいよな] Y: Really, it's only his face that looks good.

I've talked about this in my cultural/language tidbits for this episode (linked up top) but I'll add it here for completion's sake

[Y: あ、いや。なんでもない…です*] (Ah, iya, nandemonai…desu*) Y: Ah, no, it's….nothing* Yoh let's his sentence trail off before tacking on a "desu" at the end. "Desu" is an ending verb characteristic of "polite" speech, which Yoh doesn't use frequently with Segasaki (in fact, by this point, he has not used polite speech with Segasaki at all, except for maybe saying the full form of the word "welcome home", and even that's pushing it). Here he adds it at the end as an afterthought (the polite form of "iya" would be "iie", if he had wanted the whole sentence to be polite from the get go), which tells us that Yoh's feeling a little off-kilter here, and does introduce the slightest distance between him and Segasaki. We'll see this distance increase as the episode goes on.

[Y: いや、どう考えても食べ過ぎだろう] Y: No but, no matter which way you look at it, (he's) eaten way too much hasn't he? Btw, if your hair started standing at the spoon scraping the pot - in the manga artist's post about visiting the shooting venue (as well as during Ep 1 twitter space) it was mentioned that Mashiko, the actor, can actually cook, so during filming they had to tell him what someone who can't would likely do, and also asked him to do the housework poorly (because Yoh's not supposed to be good at cooking or housework hahaha)

この人*、明日も朝早いんだよな。たぶん。 Original: This guy, has an early morning again tomorrow. Probably. Mine: This person*, has (to leave) early tomorrow morning too. Probably. *The word here is "kono hito", literally "this person". There's actually nothing wrong with the translation "this guy" tbh because that's a fairly neutral term in English, but I'm highlighting it here because in his monologues, Yoh usually refers to Segasaki using much rougher language, such as "koitsu, aitsu", except when he addresses Segasaki directly in his head. I'll talk more about how Yoh addresses Segasaki in the analysis post, but for now - this sentence hints that Yoh has clocked Segasaki's tiredness (subconsciously or not) and is feeling a little bad for him. Then again he quickly hides that by adding on "probably". (Adding the word "probably" behind your sentence is a common way to express doubt/negate what you just said, and incidentally is commonly used by comedians to deliver a punchline).

[Y: あの*…あの…寝るなら部屋でとおもって。] Original: Um… Hey… You should go back to your room. Mine: Um*... Um... if you're going to sleep then, (it would be better to sleep) in your room - at least that's what I thought...

*"あの…" (ano…), translated as "um" here, is a common sound you use when you want to get someone's attention but don't want to sound too demanding - it actually isn't being polite per se, but it does show the hesitancy with which Yoh approaches him. Contrast this with the way Segasaki gets Yoh's attention (so far it's just been "Yoh" or "Oi" - the latter of which you would NOT use unless you were close to the person, or looking for a fight).

As a general rule of thumb, the level of politeness in Japanese is directly correlated with the length of the sentence and just how far you can beat around the bush. So, Yoh's suggestion that Segasaki goes to sleep in his room is literally just "if sleeping, then room..." and everything else in that translation is assumed. He may not being using polite speech forms here (that would be "to omoimashita" instead of "to omotte") but this is still a common way to be polite because he's making a suggestion that is so mild Segasaki can choose to ignore it. This is a great example of Brown & Levinson's "negative politeness" which we'll revisit when analysing their speech patterns, and which you can read about in entirely too much detail here (free to read).

[Y: じゅあ、俺は寝るので** あの、その、そういうことで、おやすみ] Original: Then, I’ll go to sleep. That…sort of thing. Good night. Mine: So then, I'm going to bed, therefore**... Um... that... with that... night!

"Therefore" is an awkward translation for the word ので (node), which is more often translated as "so". I've chosen to use that word because "node", whilst again not a polite form per se, is less colloquial than the more commonly used "から(kara)", to mean the same thing. It tends to pop up more in writing than in speech. "Therefore" doesn't make a sentence polite/formal in English, but it's definitely less colloquial than using the word "so". The use of "node" is just that tiny bit out of place in this sentence paired with the informal pronoun "ore" for "I" as opposed to the more formal choice of "boku".

Again, Yoh answers Segasaki properly here with a "はい (hai)" as opposed to his usual "un" (which is a sound that expresses agreement), when told that Segasaki will be late again. There actually aren't very many moments where Yoh does speak politely to Segasaki (he's definitely rude when he talks about Segasaki in his head hahaha), so these moments stand out. This whole short exchange, together with the random -desu he added earlier, just make Yoh's sentences a little more stilted/awkward, and more distant. Individually they don't deserve much mention at all, but together, and in the context of his jealousy, show just how unsure Yoh is about where he stands with Segasaki.

[Y: あの人の帰宅が遅くなり] Y: That person returned home later and later

"That person" - similar to the above usage of "this person". This sentence is incomplete - the verb form of the last word - 遅くなり (osokunari) indicates that there should be a second part to the sentence (the "completed" form would be osokunatta). But after he says this, there is a pregnant pause, as Yoh puts his phone down and continues cooking alone. The pause continues all the way into the next scene, before the sentence continues, highlighting the loneliness that Yoh feels.

[Y: 当然、触れられることもないままに] Original: Of course, he did not touch me at all Mine: (and) of course, (I) remained untouched (by him) as well

The literal translation for this would be "(the situation in which I) was not touched (by him) continued on as well". Yoh uses the passive form of the word "touch", which places the emphasis on Yoh "receiving" the action of being touched as opposed to placing the emphasis on Segasaki "carrying out" the action of touching Yoh. Consider the difference between the sentences "I was hurt by him" and "he hurt me". The former is the passive form, and is super common in Jp, much less common in Eng. If this is confusing - welcome to Jp grammar just know that the emphasis of this line is more on what Yoh does not have, rather than what Segasaki has not done. It accentuates Yoh's feelings of emptiness and loss.

Y: すっかり日々は過ぎて Y: The days pass by completely ...

Similarly, this sentence is "incomplete", and is instead continued by Segasaki walking in and telling Yoh he'll be late again. (This whole bit just hurts my soul tbh, Yoh is so lonely. )

This is a teruteru bouzu aka a charm of sorts for good weather. See the cultural tidbits post for Ep 2 linked up top for more info!

This is said really strongly, and gives the "what the hell are you doing" feel. Yoh's truly upset here.

I try not to care about some of the subs in these side conversations because they don't add much to the main story and these posts are already too long, but this sentence should really be "Dammit, maybe I should (go) troll the chat" (and the previous sentence should be "If this was broadcasted in a certain country it would be instant death" aka N.Korea ^^;) and I just think it was a nice touch to hint at the fandom wars/flaming that goes on between fans hahaha

[Y: しんどい] Y: This is too draining The word here used is "shindoi", which is a term used when you're feeling mentally/physically exhausted/drained, and carries a sense of frustration (at feeling this way) and sometimes (emotional) pain.

This. Is. Huge. Segasaki does 2 things here - one, he rejects an after-work meal, which you rarely do because Japan is all about the group and rejecting a group invite, to welcome a new member, can make you seem like you aren't a team player - two, the guy who invites him is his senior, which you can tell because Segasaki sticks to polite speech forms whilst the other guy does not. It's still relatively casual, so you can tell he's got a good working relationship with them (probably why he's not worried about rejecting them) but still. In Segasaki's world, Yoh is the No. 1 priority.

This is more accurately "WTF". There are many sounds in Japanese that aren't exactly words, but carry a lot of meaning - "Haa?!" is one of them, and is a very rude way to express a lot of anger and shock. Please, never say this in real life. You will royally piss off whoever it's directed at and if you are outside a Shibuya bar you will get punched.

The word used here is てめぇ (temee), which is a really rude way to say "you", and has the same energy as "you bastard". Segasaki usually uses the informal pronoun "omae" for "you" when he talks to Yoh, he's definitely pissed off here.

This is the same word, "shindoi" again.

I'm going to put the rest of the whole argument here with just my translation because it's too long to screencap the whole thing.

[S: 何なんだよ？このエロい惨状は Y: うるさい。 Y: 俺は売れっ子エロ漫画家になるんだ S: なんだそりゃ。おい *takes away beer can* Y: 売れっ子さんが　シコリながらネーム描くと　いいのができるって言ってた S: なんも描けてなかったぞ。 S: おい、だめだっつってんの S: 飲みすぎ　出すもん出して　寝てただけだろう Y: 黙れ！ Y: 俺はエロくて　抜ける漫画描いて　いっぱい稼いで Y: 早く　こんなとこ出ていくんだ S: はあ？　おい、お前　どういうつもりだよ Y: どうもこうもないよ！ Y: 平気で抱かれてると思うなよ。 Y: 俺のこと、好きでもないくせに Y: 便利な奴隷としか思ってないんだろう？そんなにやりたきゃ隣のキャスターとやってろよ S: お前　さっきから　何を... Y: 俺はあんな風に笑いかけられたことない]

Breakdown: S: What's up with this? This lewd disaster of a scene Y: (You're) annoying! ["うるさい (urusai)" is often translated as "shut up", but it literally means someone is being "noisy", and here is more of a complaint that Segasaki is being bothersome] Y: I'm going to become a hot-selling erotica manga artist! [the word used here is 売れっ子 (urekko), which literally means "someone who gets huge sales" and mostly refers to idols, entertainers, TV personalities etc. So Yoh is not just saying he's going to become popular, he's saying he's gonna be like a celebrity manga artist, which is why Segasaki snorts a little at this] S: What's with that? Hey. *takes away beer can* Y: The hot sellers say that if you jerk off whilst drawing your storyboard, you'll come up with good stuff [urekko-san is a pretty cute way of referring to these popular artists] S: You've not drawn anything, you know? [this is said with a really indulgent air, which contrasts directly with the more authoritative tone of the next line] S: Hey, I'm telling you no more *grabs beer can* S: You drank too much. You just shot what you shot and then went to sleep didn't you? [And this is back to an indulgent tone - also, everyone knows Segasaki is talking about cumming here, he just doesn't actually say it so directly] Y: Shut up! ["黙れ (damare) - contrast with "urusai" earlier. The former is used much less commonly and really does mean to "be quiet". This is why Segasaki pauses and looks at Yoh. Up until now Segasaki just thinks Yoh's gotten drunk and is whining cutely, but this word means things are serious.] Y: I'm going to draw manga that is erotic, that you can wank off to, and then earn lots of money [this is a call back to the conversation with Man-san over the phone in Ep 1, which I did not include earlier because I didn't think it was important to the story when Yoh says "the work that was released last month was amazing! There was a big buzz around the topic "I can't wank off (to this)" - Yoh was being sarcastic here, meaning that he got reviews that his work wasn't erotic enough] Y: and leave this sort of place soon! S: What? Hey - what (the hell) are you thinking? [Again, "haa?" here shows he does NOT like what Yoh's saying, but he does soften the end of the sentence with a "yo"] Y: I'm not thinking of anything! Y: Embracing me so easily - don't think you can (keep on) doing that [again, this is the passive form, so the emphasis is on Yoh being embraced, and here has the nuance of "don't think I'll just (keep on) being fine with being embraced (by you) like it's some sort of norm"] Y: when you don't even like me [this line has quite a bit of bitterness in it - the emphasis here is strongly on Segasaki and his apparent "non-liking" of Yoh my english is dying.] Y: You think of me as just a convenient slave, don't you? Y: If you want to do it that much, go do it with that forecaster next to you! S: You... from the start... what have (you been saying?) Y: I have never been smiled at like that before [again, this is in passive voice]

It's obvious from the acting alone that this entire argument is pretty emotionally charged - this is also reflected in the language because Yoh uses the pronoun "ore (I)" a lot. Pronouns are frequently dropped in Japanese - often you can go an entire conversation without ever uttering the words "I/me" or "you", in part because the pronouns are assumed and also because emphasis on an individual can come across as too selfish/narcissistic or direct. Segasaki uses them often enough with Yoh, which fits his personality, but Yoh normally doesn't. So, when he uses "ore" here it stands out - his plans to be successful and leave, his feelings, his interpretation of Segasaki's actions - all of the emphasis is on his own self. The message is very clear - Yoh is hurting a lot more than he is blaming or accusing Segasaki.

[Y: もう疲れた。あんたといると疲れる。嫌いだ S: お前　酒入るとめちゃくちゃしゃべるんだな Y: ねぇ、何で雨の時はだめなの？ S: はあ？　だって、お前が言ったんだろう] Y: (I'm) tired out. When (I'm) with you, (I) get tired. Hate it. [We've lost the "I" pronouns here, because the emphasis is on the extreme sense of physical and emotional fatigue as opposed to Yoh himself, and on how much he dislikes that feeling. Of note, "hate" here is closer to "detest/really dislike" - the word is "kirai" - which is not as strong as the word "nikui" which we talked about in Ep 1 when Yoh said he hated the part of him that always listened to Segasaki. Also, this is the first time Yoh has addressed Segasaki with the pronoun "you" out loud - he uses "あんた anta", which he also used in his head in Ep 1, after they did it. Again, we'll talk about this in the analysis post in the future, but for now just know that this term is usually used between older couples.] S: You... once you start drinking you really start talking huh? [literally, you "become able to talk"] Y: Hey...why is it when it rains, (we) can't do it? S: What? Because, you said so didn't you? [the last "haa?" from Segasaki! This time expressing his surprise and slight indignation.]

[S: 俺は優しいんだ] S: I. am. Kind. Great example of Segasaki's use of the "ore" pronoun here to quite literally emphasise how great he is. "優しい (kind)" in Japanese carries the connotation of being thoughtful, anticipating the other person's needs and wants and then meeting them etc. It's a characteristic that people often say they look for in their potential partners.

[S: そもそも、なんだ先の言いぐさは好きじゃないだの　出ていきたいだのお前　俺のプロポーズを受けといてよくそんなことが言えんな S: 養ってやる*っつってんだ　プロポーズ以外になに] S: In the first place, what was with those things you said earlier? That you don't like me, that you want to leave... You... that was rich, saying all that after accepting my proposal. S: I was saying I'd provide and care* for you. If that's not a proposal than what is? ["養ってやる" is a pretty possessive way to say I'll provide for you - it's the same word used when referring to parent providing for a child, or an owner providing for a small animal. It's not rude per se, but it does imply a power imbalance. Segasaki actually sort of has a point here because... this is not something you say to someone else unless you're in a relationship ^^;]

S: ていうかお前、俺のこと嫌いなんだ S: どうなの S: Actually about that... so you hate me huh? S: Which is it?

S: ふーん。あ、そ S: Ohh..? I see. ふーん (Ohh..?) - Segasaki says this a lot, especially in this episode. This is another one of those sounds that isn't a word but carries a lot of meaning. It has a dismissive sort of tone to it, like you've already assumed something or when you're pretty nonchalant/not impressed about whatever the other person has said and are just playing along with them by giving them some attention (so again, if you use it wrongly, it can piss people off). Segasaki uses it whenever Yoh goes mute or shy, as a way to tease Yoh - though Yoh seems to think Segasaki is dismissing/not interested in his answer. あ、そ (A, so) - again, Segasaki says this a lot - can be interpreted as "oh really?/I see/is that so?" - Combined with the above, you can see why Yoh often thinks Segasaki isn't interested in his answer, and even when he does recognise it as teasing, he gets too flustered to do anything about it.

This seems to have gotten longer, if you reached the end - congratulations! I hope this makes it a little clearer why it's so obvious to us as the viewer that Segasaki is really quite patient with Yoh, and is waiting for him to come to terms with his feelings, but at the same time so confusing for Yoh, because of the way many of these interactions can be read both ways. In Ep 3, we'll really be able to get into their dynamics because they've got so much more interaction together.

#my personal weatherman #taikan yohou #体感予報 #MPW subtitle corrections #mytranslations #finally got it out #doing a breakdown of the argument was very fun #this is like the most indulgent t/n ever #i am indulging myself the same way segasaki indulges yoh #thanks to everyone for reading my indulgent notes #please geek out with me more #these two are so perfect for each other #sorry I wanted to get Ep 3 and the analysis out before Ep 4 but it's not happening

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bronx-bomber87 · 1 year ago

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Happy Friday everyone! Doing today cause I shall be doing 5x01 On Sunday like I mentioned before to not be posting on Christmas. :) Holy crap we’re on the S4 finale. I remember when I watching it when it premiered thinking is this real life? Thought I was in a fever dream haha Made some long gifs to fit everything in LOL This one is super packed also this ep doesn’t need much more of an intro. So let’s get this party started.

4x22 Day in The Hole

Our fav patch work family gets the cold open. This moment truly is Tim and Lucy in mom/dad mode. Makes me so damn happy. Tim complaining because Tamara is late to meet them. Moaning on and on saying they have to go... but makes no effort to actually move or leave. Because the both of them have Tim wrapped around their finger. That man isn't moving but will complain the whole time about it LOL Lucy going into wifey mode calming him down saying she’ll be here. Relax. ha

Tamara pulls in and almost hits someone. In a police station parking lot... Their reactions I’m dying. Just a couple of concerned parents watching their kid almost cause an accident. Lucy is a proud mom as she pulls up. Clapping her hands. Tim looking like the stern father. He glares at the car wanting to see if this car is safe enough for her. This is a glimpse into them as parents. I’m liking what I see. Also can I say how cute it is Lucy wants Tim to look at her car in first place. Of course he said yes.

Tamara comes out and says isn’t she pretty? Saying it’s her first car. Lucy correcting her saying actually her car was her first. Tamara makes a joke about it being her fifth if they’re talking stolen. Tim has such a dad moment. ‘What?’ She loves to push their buttons it’s hilarious. Telling Tim it's a joke. Just loves messing with her pseudo mom and dad. Lives for it really. This is a fantastic way to start this episode off.

The family energy in this scene giving me all the feels. Lucy telling her to get it checked by the mechanic first. That you never know what cars from seized police auction go through. Tamara says Tim set her up with his guy already. Lucy is beaming about this. Says ‘Awww you do have a heart.’ ha Tim can't be seen as soft so he deflects.

But you are soft for both your girls Tim…This much is obvious ha You're a soft little puppy for them. I mean it's only for them but a marshmallow none the less. His reply is sassy af. Saying it’s purely out of self interest. He didn’t want to deal with Lucy being a drag with her dying in a mangled fireball of metal on the 405. The scoff/look Tamara shoots his way is hilarious. Tim fires back ‘Joke.’

Like Father like daughter and I’m dying with the cuteness in this cold open. Also Tim mirroring her posture from when she said 'Joke' to him. LMAO Unfortunately a drug sniffing dog starts barking at the car. Tim opens the hatch back and searches it. Find kilos of drugs hidden in the compartment. Tamara looks so sad. ‘I’m not getting my car back am I?’ Hahaha Sorry my dear you are definitely not…

Lucy looks up who the car is registered to. It's ‘Jake Butler.’ Lucy pulls up his mug shot and is confused as hell. Ahhhh the beginning of Dim it’s glorious. They pick up his doppelgänger and it's pretty amusing. Didn’t have room for that portion but his ‘Yo, why you looking like me?’ LOL Kills me. They get him into interrogation and the girls are having a field day with it. Enjoying Tim's discomfort so very much. Tim isn’t about this whatsoever of course.

Lucy says maybe they were separated at birth? Tim replies he’s a year older than him and was born in FL. You can see how unsettling he finds this. Tim tries to brush this off. Saying he doesn’t look that much like him. Ok honey… Angela saying he’s not the brightest bulb. Lucy gets excited and says ‘Tim and Dim’ LMAO Enjoying herself far too much with this. Angela and Nyla are joining in on it laughing with her. They aren't helping tamp down her excitement about this at all.

Tim calling Jake 'Dim' is hilarious. Lucy's face when he does is too cute. Also It cracks me up the minute they enter interrogation Dim hits on Lucy. Doesn't waste any time. I’m dying. Also you know Melissa and Eric had a blast filming these scenes. They’re so funny. The cockiness on Dim saying she would remember ha! Man isn’t lacking in the confidence department that's for sure. They tell him they found his car. He gets all excited saying someone stole it LOL

They inform him it was towed cause he parked by a hydrant haha Tim confronts him about the drugs in the car and Dim denies having it. Because of course he does. His fingerprints are all over the bags. Tim says he helps them and they’ll keep him out of prison. Dim gets offended and says he thought they had a bond ha.

Lucy asks where the drugs came from? He tells them Mexico that he was supposed to drive them over the border. But then he wanted to see his girl first before he dropped them off. I.e. Juicy heh When he came back out the car was gone. Tim asks for the name of the guy they were going to. He tells them Ray Hajek. Lucy gets a look in her eye and asks if his crew ever met him? He tells them no but why? We watch Lucy light up and Tim is confused why she is so excited haha

It’s here we see Lucy’s excitement go into hyperdrive. I love this portion because she is like a kid in a candy store with this. The sugary high to go along with it LOL Grey and Angela are no help to Tim whatsoever. They are beyond amused by Lucy’s antics. Like to note how easily Tim gives into Lucy’s demands here btw. You're married you just don’t know it yet.

Once he agrees Lucy gets ultra hyper which has me cackling. I love how she stops him with her hands. Because she’s too excited to walk now. Saying all the things they need to do to get him to look like Dim. Tim pointing out she is enjoying this way too much. Duh. I love her excited speed walk to catch up to him and say he needs tattoos. Lucy was a little too excited for those tats heh She sure loves the idea of a clean cut Tim Bradford covered in tattoos.

We pan to Lucy being on the team watching Tim’s OP. Part of the rescue team if needed. Kinda nice to see her on the watching end instead of him. Being just as much the worried wifey as he is the husband for her when she does UC. He gets taken up to the boss and does a damn good job of it. They’re pissed at him first because he disappeared with their drugs. Tim saying he went to ground because he didn’t want to get caught. Trying to avoid jamming him up.

He then asks why Wisco his heavy shouldn’t throw him over the balcony? We watch Lucy and Angela tense up. Tim has this handled with his reply above though. He is shocked with his intelligent reply. Saying he heard he was dumb. Tim continues on saying he wants people to think he’s dumb. Means they underestimate him.

That answer is enough for him. Tell Tim get his cash on way out. Or he could do another job for him and triple it. Tim asks what kind of job? He won’t divulge that portion just yet. Only that it’s heavy and tomorrow. They’ll need a driver. They heard his old lady is fast. Tim makes a crack 'Sometimes too fast.' He laughs and tells him they’ll be in touch with him.

Angela catches Lucy and tells her she had Dim’s GF picked up. Lucy is like 'Ok…Wait why are you being weird?' Angela says she needs to see for herself. She is enjoying this far too much. It’s Juicy! Haha Having AU Tim and Lucy makes my soul happy ahahah Now Tim is the one enjoying himself. Lucy is in shock when she sees her doppelgänger. Angela adding in ‘I guess we know who’s going undercover with Dim.’

Tim’s taunting is funny I’m rolling. ‘Yeah Juicy.’ ‘No’ ‘Mmhmm It’s Juicy’ LOL I’m dying this is so hilarious. Not so funny when it’s your double eh Lucy? Also you know Angela was enjoying this way too much as well. Lucy’s ‘I don’t like that…’ cracks me up. She is so disturbed by having her own double. She was having fun before and now she doesn't like it. Also probably stirring some stuff up there is an AU version of them out there. Not only that but they're together.

We’ve arrived at THE scene for the episode. Tim is over at Lucy’s for OP prep. Saying the backstory has to be airtight. Lucy agrees with him and asks how they met? Tim's answer of a BBQ is vanilla as it gets. This is why she’s the UC babe LOL Lucy telling him that’s lame. I love her just being so upfront with him. She always is but there is a confidence here I love. This is her wheelhouse and Tim is just along for the ride. This is her show really and she proves that in this scene.

Tim is such a stubborn turd saying ‘You think you can do better?’ Oh Timothy you’re about to have your mind blown and your brain broken…She starts out strong saying ‘Watch me.’ Lucy rubs her hands together. Saying they met because he was on the run from the cops. Tim nodding along but not totally sold yet. Lucy continues on with he ended up in her building frantic.Looking for a place to hide.

That she was the one who opened up the door for him. That she lied to the cops for him. It's here we see Tim starts to be impressed with her backstory. That sweet smirk of his in the second gif. You know he is in awe of her right now. That smirk and head tilt is a dead giveaway. Look at how soft he looks gazing at her. Fooling no one sir.

Lucy’s confidence continues as she finishes up their backstory. It's the smug smile and direct eye contact she gives him as she delivers that line above that gets me. I watch this scene and I’m still in shock we got it. That Lucy is talking about their alter egos hooking up while the cops search for him. Thus his brain malfunctioning. Tim’s reaction is glorious. It will always make me laugh no matter how many times I see it.

Kudos to Eric for crushing it like he always does. Lucy short circuited his brain and it shows. He is having an repeated error message and failing to reboot. You can tell he’s trying to hide the fact she turned him on a little. She achieved this with her confidence through out the story and just blowing his mind right at the end. The man will never recover. He is legit speechless.

Tim was not expecting her to go there at all. She floored him while simultaneously turning him on LOL His professional brain came to a screeching halt when she finished. Also I'm sure he wasn't expecting to be turned on by just her words either. His body was not ready for such things. Good thing he’s sitting cause I’m sure his pants just got a little tighter….

Tim then remembers he has to reply to her plan now haha Trying to gain his wits about him. Telling her ‘Ok….that..that's pretty good actually.’ Pretty good? She just blew your backstory out of the water. Then proceeded to make your brain stop working. You know he’s a mixture of turned on and impressed as hell with her. Won’t say so but his face said it all for us didn’t it? He legit had his jaw drop like a cartoon hahaha

Tim is seeing she truly is a force to be reckoned with when it comes to UC holy crap. She is also basking in the fact that she crushed his plan with her own, made him speechless, and then got a compliment out of him. Lucy is feeling pretty proud of herself when she says 'Thank you.' I love seeing this confidence on her. It's a good look. Just like I'll never over Tim's growth same goes for her. To see the confident bad ass woman she is now. How far she's come. I love it seeing it.

Once Tim has some semblance of a brain back he mentions the elephant in the room. That if they’re gonna sell they're together. They’re gonna have to...You know…. Lucy knowing exactly what he’s talking about but giving him a hard time. Trying to get him to say the words. Pretending like she has no idea what he’s talking about. He continues to get flustered and stammers around. Poor Tim. He struggles with his words and stutters. He’s shocked she doesn’t know what he’s talking about.

Lucy is enjoying herself far too much. Look at her face. Letting him dangle and trip over his words. Knowing talking about this is making him so very uncomfortable LOL So mean to do to your soulmate Lucy ha She finally throws him a lifeline and says we might have to PDA? Tim gets frustrated she strung him along and says never mind. Lucy stops him and says he’s right. If they’re going to kiss it shouldn’t be for the first time.

Then the awkwardness that is them pre-kiss ensues. They’re not sure what to do now…So Lucy suggests they stand up. No one does awkward better than these two. They’re so out of their depth right now. It's hysterical. I love a nervous Lucy Chen she is beyond adorable right here. The way Tim starts to lean in and she bails LOL Saying ‘No’ with a nervous giggle ejecting far away from him I’m rolling.

She totally chickens out at first and I don’t blame her. After last episode I'm sure her emotions are going haywire in this moment. Being shy because she already knows of the feelings there. That this was going to bring them out even more. Tim is about to find out himself what this kiss will reveal. Tim is exasperated and not understanding what’s going on here.

He's got a let's do this and get it over with attitude. The thing is Tim is nervous too. Look at him in that first gif. Takes a deep cleansing breath before trying to give her a kiss. He is just as nervous as she is. One thing to banter and flirt with your partner. It's another to kiss them. They’re both buzzing with nerves and it’s adorable af. Hats off to Eric and Melissa in this scene. I can feel all their anxiety and giddiness in this moment. They do an amazing job in this portion.

Tim get frustrated again and says ‘Oh, you know what? We’re professionals. Let’s just get this over with.’ Lucy’s reaction is the best part LOL Telling him 'Whoa! that’s romantic.' His childish reply of saying he wasn’t trying to be romantic LMAO OMG it’s a good thing you’re about to kiss. Because I wanna yell at them to kiss and get a room already.

Their banter is primo in this scene. Legendary really as is this entire scene. We talk about them being married a lot but never more so than before this kiss. Lucy telling him he’s succeeding and he replies with his pouty face. It’s all so hilarious to watch unfold. Lucy’s nervousness continues to shine through. Trying to reset herself as she psyches herself up to kiss him.

Tim never fails in making me laugh with his expressions and reactions. Telling her in an sarcastic tone to ‘Take her time...’ LOL Lucy trying to give herself a pep talk while Tim stands there exasperated af with her. He is so very done at this point. Just waiting her out at this point. Because he’s used to his wife antics. I love his annoyed deep sigh he let outs when she’s ready to rejoin him. The way he swings his arms in impatience lol

Tim finally leans in and gives her the most pitiful peck on the lips. He’s so proud of himself when he pulls back though. It’s pretty damn adorable if you ask me. He is expecting praise from his girl only to be demolished by her. Lucy was definitely expecting way more than what he just delivered. It's almost like she has to hold back a laugh at his lack luster attempt. Also that he thought he did a good job with it. Saying ‘I'm s...Sorry, is that it?' After all that build up just an innocent peck on the lips? Tim is so offended about her critique till she lays one on him. Effectively silencing him with a kiss. Also like to note how I love how this season started with an almost kiss and ends with an actual one. Lovely bookend.

I’ll never be over her cutting him off with her lips and grabbing him by the face. Pulling him forcefully towards her lips. *phew lord* Has his whole face in her hands while she has her way with him. I love how he stumbles into the kiss at first. If you watch him in the beginning of this gif you see him fall forward into the kiss. Wasn’t expecting that show of force from her. He needs a second to readjust his body into what’s now happening. Both of their frustrations with each other melting away once their lips touch. Takes them a moment to find their rhythm. Then it’s all about melding into one another. Fitting like the perfect puzzle pieces they low key always knew they were.

How Lucy’s right hand drops to his chest as she gets comfortable in this kiss. In his arms. Doing what comes naturally while in them. She keeps her left hand firmly on his face though. Keeping those beautiful lips of his directed at her. We watch Tim start to melt into Lucy as well. See how his body begins to relax against hers. His hand has made it's way up to her shoulder. Had this continued I have no doubt they would've swapped places from where they started. His hands continuing their journey upwards. Tim encasing her face in his hands as he continued to kiss her as if his life depended on it.

We see them start to get lost in their kiss. That argument of their's a moment ago is long forgotten. It’s such a sexy first kiss sweet lord. Tim has quickly adjusted from the beginning of the kiss. He's eased into it now and is ready to go for more. We saw him begin startled then quickly relax into her as the kiss goes on. Seems so natural like they've done this before. Reminds me of Chandler and Monica. When Joey/Rachel ask Chandler what he felt when he and Monica kissed after being friends for so long? Telling them felt like 'Why haven't we been doing this the entire time?' This kiss represents that line IMO.

Look at the way he is melting into her as he looks to deepens that kiss. He’s attached to her upper lip. We can see a little tongue too. Don't think I didn't see you slip that in Timothy heh. He is ready to take this further when their pseudo daughter walks in….I love it being Tim who deepened that kiss. Making that all important first move once again. Lucy wasn’t complaining one bit btw. Cracks me up how Tamara's first solution is to go. Let them have more time alone. I'm sure she's thought of them getting together before.

She doesn't seem terribly shocked by this so much as incredibly amused. How could she not with how they are? Then the awkward hilarity begins. I’ll never be over Lucy’s ‘Oh!’ As they fly apart from each other. Both trying to put a continent between them. It’s so damn funny. Went from hot and heavy to insanely embarrassed. The music stopping abruptly as well. Never fails to make me laugh my ass off. There is so much to love after the kiss as there is with it.

The way they scramble to explain why they were making out is priceless. Stumbling over their words and each other. Lucy trying to explain that this is 'Work' Uh huh. Sure let's call it that. Tim adding on they're going UC. Tamara is bemused to say the least. Telling them they don't have to explain themselves to her. Tim then starts looking desperately for items he didn’t bring LOL Then realizing he has nothing to gather up.

'You know what? No. I didn't bring anything...' LMFAO Flustered Tim Bradford is a joy to watch. Lucy already broke his brain earlier and then destroyed it with that kiss. You know he’s in love because that man doesn’t get flustered easily. He legit doesn’t know what to do with himself. Other than awkwardly retreat from Lucy. He is shook and it’s showing big time.

I love that he’s a complete disaster just from kissing Lucy. This entire scene is iconic and makes me so happy to watch. They awkwardly point at one another. For what reason I couldn't tell you. Other than they don't know what to do with themselves right now. The height of nervous awkwardness has arrived and I’m joyful Haha They’re both so embarrassed and flustered it’s glorious.

Lucy is flaming red after she tells Tim 'G...Good work tonight'. She is mortified she just said that to him after they made out. Tim replies in kind because he is also nervously awkward as he leaves. She can’t even look at him as he makes his hasty exit. Her back is turned to him as he departs and does another dorky finger point. Saying bye to Tamara as he does. Lucy's facial expressions are legit killing me. She then she turns around to face Tamara and it only gets worse.

Lucy has no idea what to say to being caught making out with Tim. Tamara's face in that second gif is hilarious. It's like she's giving Lucy a chance to explain herself further. Wanting to see what she'll come up with. She notices Lucy isn't in the right state of mind for answers. So Tamara saves her further embarrassment and says she’s headed to her room…Bless you. Your pseudo mother needed that LOL

We join Tim in the hallway post all of that mess haha. I once again must commend Eric and his wonderful expressions. He conveys so very much in this moment. It’s the range of emotions he expresses that is so impressive. He just nails it. This is the moment where Tim realizes his feelings for Lucy. Yes she short circuited his brain 100 percent here. But there is far more to this expression than that.

4x21 was Lucy’s epiphany episode. This is Tim’s 'Oh shit I’m in love with Lucy' moment. It’s like he finally has the answer to why he’s always felt the way he’s felt. Why he fought so hard for her not to wash out. Why he said and did things he didn’t totally understand for her. Explaining why he was so protective with her in UC. Why he was ALWAYS happier around her. Just like Lucy it’s hitting him like freight train. His feelings coming sharply into focus.

He goes from broken brain, to realization he’s in love with her, to oh shit I’m in love with my best friend...what am I going to do? The way his eye bug out a little as he comes to this conclusion is everything. That kiss cleared the skies in his brain. He can see clearly now and it scaring him a little. Everything was muddled before and now it’s clear as day. He looks back at her door before he is able to unroot himself from that spot. Tim Bradford is in love with Lucy Chen and it’s just hitting him ❤️

The awkward cuteness continues the next day. Tim is sitting in his truck with his thoughts. Probably having an existential crisis in the process tbh. I bet you he didn't sleep a wink last night either. Probably trapped in his thoughts the entire time. Also he is clearly just waiting for Lucy to appear. Which is pretty damn adorable.

He perks right up when she arrives. Makes me heart so happy actually. Giving me all the feels. He is so adorable waiting on the girl he loves so he can talk to her. They’re both so smitten at this point my heart is gonna implode. She spots him waiting in his truck. Then does her adorkable wave at him when he notices her looking at him. It's so cute I cannot. They’re both so nervous it’s beyond precious.

First off love them matching in colors. I feel this was intentional both being in light blue. Once they reach each other the air is rife with unresolved tension. They cut each other off both wanting to speak. Lucy tells him to go first. You can see Tim desperately wants to clear the air. Be vulnerable about the kiss. We see the hope on Lucy’s face as he struggles to find the words. That he is going to say that kiss unlocked something, that it was more than just a practice kiss etc.

That does seem where he is headed when he started this convo. Then our boy loses his nerve completely. Says they should work more on their backstory …You can see the sheer disappointment on Lucy’s face that he said that instead. Probably wishing she had gone first and not him. It’s ok Tim you’ll gain the courage in 5x08 don’t worry. My little awko tacos. How I love thee.

Phew lord that was daunting to write about and tackle haha The sheer volume of gifs out there for this one are immense. But damn I love their slow burn so very much and adore writing about it. Can’t believe we’re done with s4 what a trip.

~~~

Side notes-non chenford

Nolan had a SL but meh.

The only parts worth mentioning are Nell/Elroy being adorable. And how hilarious it was Pete slept through the entire fight scene for Bailey LOL

Thank you to all the readers been with me on this especially those from the very start. You know who you are :) Your likes, comments and reblogs have been a bright spot in my day shall see you all in S5 woo.

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jungkoode · 25 days ago

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hello. i am new . can you. explain what the your. bio ‘adhd’ lock. all that means? thank u . love 🙏🏻

Oh hi! Sorry I thought it was super clear, I’ll explain real quick in case anybody else is wondering about this too.

ADHD — I have ADHD so it’s like a warning beforehand, so people know I’m neurodivergent right away and they probably understand the way I reply / narrate / am a bit more clearly.

🔒— means I’m taken! In a long-term commited relationship.

she/her — my pronouns! I identify as female.

25+ — my age range :) basically I’m 25 or older. I don’t usually like talking about personal stuff, so I just indicate 25+ in my bio to let newcomers know I’m at least 25 years old—though I have already answered what my age is some time ago. Up to you if you want to dig deeper hahaha.

mdni — Minors do not interact. Since I’m an adult, I don’t want minors interacting with me or my posts in any way. I write mature stories, so I’m just uncomfortable knowing there are people below 18 years old lurking around. Which is why this is stated in my bio.

GMT +1 — my time zone!

navi — my navigation post, which is the one I have pinned. This is in case someone discovers any of my fics or posts and wants to check my navi right away, they can simply click on ‘navi’ on my bio to go over there immediately.

m.list — my master list post! Where all of my fics and works are listed with summaries and links.

☕️ — my ko.fi, for commissions and in case anybody wants to support me or give me any tip!

Hope that clears things up!

#askjungkoode

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lemotmo · 26 days ago

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https://www.tumblr.com/lemotmo/780656269129334784/in-my-opinion-there-is-no-time-for-any-other

This definitely is an interesting point of view. And while I do think they have time to tell more personal character driven stories in the remaining episodes since as we have seen the show can do a lot in a little time if they want, and I definitely do feel like we have had a lot more direct call and acknowledgment of buddie this season,

I can’t fully say this anons buddie and Tim argument is flawed either though. Because that is an established pattern of the show and Tim. Buddie gets hyped for s bit. Gets the numbers in. We all collectively go omg it’s finally happening and then suddenly the show takes a sharp right turn, issues bts happen that throw everything off and into chaos, and we get left with a “oh haha tune in next season 😉”

It’s been happening since s3 tbh. Which now we know it never stood of actually happening thanks to fox which in hindsight them making any kind of build up while also actively never letting it go anywhere with out our knowledge is even crappier. But I think that’s also why it sucks so much to see now because with ABC it truly has felt possible but like this anon said. The same conversations and concerns that were discussed at the start of the season are now again here at the end. Eddie being sidelined when he shouldn’t be. Pacing issues. Time management issues. Tim getting side tracked. Storylines being moved around and pushed backed. Which this late into the season shouldn’t be happening. But 8 almost 9 seasons into a series most definitely should not still be happening.

And we are very rapidly approaching the end of the season and rapidly heading for once again a “oh haha tune in next season 😉” and more and more I see more and more people starting to say well “buddie canon season 9 here we go!” Which is again an every season occurrence where we all collectively say this is the season! And then by the end we look like 🤡 and adjust the goal post another season. And then it’s rinse and repeat season after season. Which is another interesting point of when do we stop doing that. Because for as long as everyone constantly just goes eh maybe next season, it’s just more room for the show to keep doing it and dragging it out. I know people don’t like to discuss this and it normally gets written off as dooming. Which in a way it is. But it’s also a conversation that eventually the fandom does need to have with itself of when is enough, enough. Like how many seasons of haha maybe this time before sorry your out of chances do we give. Fox we know now was never gonna happen. And with ABC we could maybe give them a pass on s7. It was right off a double strike, and a shortened season, and a brand new network. But if it’s the same old same old at the end of this season? What do we do then. Because this was a fully filled out 18 episodes season with no strikes, no network changes season.

Idk. I’m keeping the hope something is coming for us by season end. But I’ve been doing that for years now so nothing new lol. But with us once more being at the end of the season, chaos happening bts, Tim constantly getting distracted, I can’t say I’d be super shocked to end with yet another hahaha maybe next season guys ending either.

See, I do understand what you are saying here and I get your frustration with the show and with the fandom just accepting it. It's been years now and we're all a little tired.

I see the problems with Tim in charge and I definitely see the problems when it comes to Eddie's narrative and how his story gets sidelined so often. I does frustrate me. But the thing is: it isn't anything new. 🤷‍♀️

I've been watching network TV-shows for decades now and I've seen my favourite characters been sidelined in order to let others shine so many times. In most of those shows the slowburns have always burned extremely slow. The worst one was 'The X-files', no doubt about it.

So I've built up a lot of patience when it comes to my ships going canon. And I've learnt to enjoy the screentime my favourites do get when they are on my screen.

When I watch TV-shows I love, I don't want to waste time on being frustrated, because I know it won't change anything. I cannot influence any TV-show, no matter how much I wish I could. So I've learned to enjoy what we do get. Does that make sense?

And for 911? We have literally never been closer than this. I had zero hope for Buddie canon up until season 6. We got some great Buddie episodes and scenes in all of the first 6 seasons, but it was always something that stood on its own and wasn't properly addressed.

Season 7 and especially 8 have changed all of that. These two seasons are game changers. They have consistently brought us closer to Buddie canon, with 7 giving us bi Buck and 8b actually asking some important questions out loud.

For me that is more than enough. I can now see where this story is going. They have committed to the ship and can't pull back from this, because then they will most certainly face public backlash from the audience AND the press. It's gone too far. They have passed the point of no return.

So I'm content now. Yes, I am critical of some choices Tim made in season 7 and 8a. And yes, I can still be frustrated with Eddie being sidelined in an episode that would have fit him like a glove, but it is what it is. This is how Tim and the writers wanted it and I'm sure it'll all have a purpose in the end. Do I always like these choices? No. But again, there is nothing I can do about it, so why be angry and complain? I don't want to end up hating one of my favourite shows.

Logically we'll see some more evolution in this storyline in season 8. Now, I don't know what this evolution is going to look like, but since the question of 'Buck being in love with Eddie' has been asked by Maddie and Buck himself? I do think we'll get an answer to that question in season 8. It makes sense.

Right now Eddie is still the wild card when it comes to Buddie. But Buck is living in his house now. When he returns to LA with Chris he will most certainly stay with Buck, which would be such a great set up for Eddie to confront his feelings. So yeah, I do think we'll get to see some of Eddie's emotions on this as well and I think we'll get some kind of resolution there, however small it may be.

What this resolution will look like? I don't know. That's up to the show itself. I'm just a viewer and a fan.

Bottom line, for the first time in so many seasons the show has made its Buddie intentions loud and clear. The question has been asked, out loud and on screen. So it is happening and I'm more than happy with that. I am content. 😌

Yes, if I could have written their story myself, I would have made so many different choices than what the show ended up doing. But I'm not a writer on this show. So what is the point of dwelling on that?

We are finally in a position where the Buddie question has been addressed. So I'm going to sit down, patiently watch each episode and be a little disappointed with what we didn't get, but happy with what we did get.

As for the timeline of it all? I haven't a clue. 🤷‍♀️

I never had a clue about the timeline for any other of the TV-shows I've watched in the past. It was always a waiting game, so I'm used to it by now. 😌

Nonny please don't see this as me dismissing your feelings or your opinions in any way. I see you. I get your frustrations and I read your opinions, understand them, even share some of them. Your views matter just as much as mine do.

I'm just in a really good place right now when it comes to Buddie. I'm happy with what we've got and I'm feeling quite optimistic to what we might still get in season 8. That's all.🤷‍♀️

#nonnies galore #911 abc #buddie #buddie speculation #911 8b speculation #buddie expectations

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jayparked · 1 month ago

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dear diary,

i promised myself i would finish my entire lab before i started reading anything new, but i did like one question and am now about to start reading again because i am tired and want to curl up in bed and read like the hermit i am. i live in eternal fear of the ruination i may or may not face as a lovely little parking ticket (and if we’re all parking ticketz, i would be a parking ticket u get at uni for parking where the board members park).

much love,

that $150 parking ticket everyone hates getting

me asf honestly HAHAHA

i've been reading more but i'm running out of stuff to read. i have 15 fics saved in my likes rn but they're all like...super long and i haven't had the energy to focus on long fics for a bit. i need people to stop being responsible and write more fics pls

dear diary,

my coworker described the weather as washington degrees and honestly? yeah fits the vibe. on this beautiful washington degrees day a storm is brewing, but not outside. no dear diary, the storm is brewing in my mind. i've perfected my evil supervillain laugh and i'm doing it now as i look at my poor innocent parking ticketz. oh diary they have no idea what's in store for them. i have taken out my weapons of mass destruction (my google doc) and have since been preparing for dooms day (the day i post jay's update). but diary, i have so much planned. so much that i haven't even discussed on this blog. once i beat the tired and burnout it's so over for everyone. god knew i'd be too powerful if i was mentally and physically well but i am driven by spite and my constant need for praise and approval. god did not forsee that now did he? muahahaha. things may be delayed but one thing i have always been is patient. so diary, until next time <3

-snail

(i would be a noise complaint ticket. i have no reason being so mf loud all the time. i'm always laughing at weird hours of the night. sorry neighbors)

#this is so funny HAHAHA #snail mail

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thecapricunt1616 · 1 year ago

Text

Blue Lotus - SxC Fic - Chapter 2

♡ Summary: Carmy & Syd go horseback riding!!! Carmy's therapy friends push him to go for what he wants, his 'light at the end of the tunnel'

♡ W/C: 6,534

♡ Posted Date: 04/07/2024

♡ A/N: Hayoooo!!! I am too inspired... this has become a multi-chap fic hahaha I am havin' so much fun here!! Thank you @gingergofastboatsmojito for inspiring me to keep going!!! ILY! As per usual please know - this fic was inspired by THIS FIC here - Tucson by the GLORIOUS GINGER!!!! Go read that before you even THINK about reading this fic ok?! I love how I hate storer for the same reasons but im a sucker for writing a slowburn - I find myself screaming at MYSELF internally "make them kiss already!!!!" but they will KISSSS SHORTLY SO SHORTLY MY DEARSSSS !!! It will be a JUICY TAYLOR SWIFT DAYLIGHT ASS KISS OK!!!! THEY WILL ONLY SEE EACHOTHER FROM THEN ON!!!! Its gonna be a 'and I can still see it all in my mind all of you all of me intertwined I USED TO THINK LOVE WOULD BE BLACK AND WHITE BUT ITS GOLDENNNNNNN. We need Carmy to realize a few more things but then - he will be hozier level devoted to this woman even more then he already is, I hope you enjoy!!

♡ Warnings for BTC: Not really any? Like? LOL - Swearing?! Smoking cigarettes?! They just went horseback riding & carmy went to therapy- oh Ig talks of carmy getting hard LMAO but thats as crazy as we get this chapter. ➵ 𝐂𝐡𝐞𝐜𝐤 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐦𝐲 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭 ♡ ➵ 𝐂𝐚𝐭𝐜𝐡 𝐮𝐩 𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐋𝐚𝐬𝐭 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 ♡

Stardust nudges his shoulder so hard he almost falls over, and he turns to look at her. His heart jumped into his throat, his mouth suddenly feeling dry. She was there, she was really there.

“Uh-” he blinked a few times, to be sure that she wouldn’t disappear. “Syd? Hey..uh-” he felt his entire body buzzing with excitement. He couldn’t help the smile that took over his features. She looked… gorgeous. Carmen wasn’t sure there actually was a word in any human language ever to exist that could describe just how wonderful she looked.

Her hair was in its natural state, she was wearing an adorable corduroy jacket, black jeans, and white sneakers. “You came to a farm…in those?” he motions to her shoes.

She laughs a bit “Wow- it’s great to see you too, Carm. Didn’t realize you were…actually like living on a farm” she approached him carefully.

“Shit- yes- fuck- It’s its so good to see you, Syd, C’mere” he pulls her into a tight, long hug. The smell of her lavender vanilla perfume nearly made him melt.

“You’re like…tan- and…muscley now” She laughs a bit, squeezing his arm lightly.

“Uh..” he pulled away, cheeks bright red. “Yeah uh.. It's like- fuckin hard t’ride a horse. And the um…” he rubbed his neck nervously “The uh cows.. They eat hay? Most the time, and so we need to move the bales during the morning for em, they’re like…. 75? 80 pounds? So moving like 10 back and forth every day helps. And I dont really.. Go inside? Here? Its like… uh.. Thats the therapy mostly, the animals- at least f’me” he said sheepishly.

She nodded, looking around the stable. “That one behind you is yours? Shes been side-eying me creepily since I started talking” she pointed to Stardust.

“Oh! Fuck sorry yea, well- no…not- not mine- I got ‘er t’trust me. But uh, yeah this is Stardust. She’s a super sweet girl” He explained. Stardust leaned in, sniffing Syds hair carefully.

“Cute- All you’re missing is a hat” She teased.

He chuckled a bit, “Ok, c’mon - why are you here, Syd” He said with a small smile, crossing his arms over his chest.

She shrugged, looking at the ground and kicking a rock out of the way with her shoe. “Cause…I was worried- I dunno…” She definitely wasn't going to get bold and tell him that she’d missed him, terribly.

“Ok…well now that y’here, and y’see i’m okay…wanna have some fun?” He asked, a small smile on his lips.

Syd looked back up at him, as if he had 3 heads. “Okay- Where is Carmen Berzatto- Not his… Weird alien clone- Camren Brazota” she said, laughing a bit “what do you mean fun?” She asked, and Carmy laughed, real, and genuine.

“Well- If I didn’t change my view a little I’d never leave. So, yes, Syd, ‘a little fun never hurt noone’ - per my therapist. Shes fuckin annoying. I much prefer the horses.” He pet Star’s mane and she leaned into his touch.

“Holy shit” Syd laughed a bit. “Wow- alright. I feel like you’re a whole new man already, what kind of fun?” she mused.

“Ever ridden a horse?” he walked over to the saddle rack, pulling off a double seated one and hanging it over the back of the stall door.

“No- Actually, Don’t I need um…like - stuff for it?” she asked.

“Oh don’t think I wont give you the full experience” he opened the riding closet, “Whats your shoe size?” he asked, crouching down and looking through the pairs of extras.

“8? Er- 9 probably 9” she said. He dug through them until he found a matching pair.

“These should do, y’stuff is cool here we can just leave it in her stall” he told her, holding out his arm for her to hold while she switched her shoes.

“You seem like…” she said as she slipped off her sneaker and put on the boot. “I dunno…chill- well- i wont go that far- but chill-er then before.” Carm snorted a laugh, holding on to her arm to steady her.

“Thanks? I guess..that’s good right?” He asked.

“Yeah! Yeah of course…I mean, it’s nice. To see you not so…anxious.” She said, slipping the other boot on.

“Yeah I um…” he cleared his throat, opening the stall door. “I uh..I’m takin meds- Now? Uh..all this shit. Y’know they have me like tranquilized more then these guys” he said and she laughs, Carmen smiled proudly at the fact, relishing in the wonderful sound.

“But yeah like Like 3 er..er 4. they say I had all this uh..mental shit. Goin’ on w’me and that’s why I was all…wound up I guess” he explained, calling Star out and getting her harness situated.

Syd caught herself staring at his arms as he worked, how the toned muscle moved beneath the fabric of the shirt.

“Aren’t you freezing?” She asked, noticing he wasn’t wearing a jacket like she was.

“Used to it now, well- I mean the moving around. It gets hot this shit is heavy. Wanna try to hold the saddle?” He asked, unhooking the saddle from the stall door where he’d left it momentarily.

“It can’t be that bad” she countered.

“I think this thing weighs probably as much as you do.” He said “hold out your arms” he smiled a bit.

She lifted her arms out in front of her and he plops the saddle down, she had to plant one of her feet forward so she didn’t fall face first due to the sudden weight and he laughed, catching the saddle quickly and baring most the weight.

“Told you” he teased.

She rolled her eyes “yeah whatever. Saddle up the horse, cowboy” she dropped the saddle back in his arms. He hurled the saddle over Stars back with a grunt.

“Fuckin hell” he huffed, realizing since the saddle was nearly double the weight as his usual, and being on the shorter end- he couldn’t just get it on her when she was standing straight. “Bow” he told the horse and she just stared at Sydney.

“Don’t embarrass me, Star. Bow” he told her and she looked the other way.

“So uhhh…this one’s trained, huh?” Sydney teased.

Carmen looked back at her “mmhmm maybe she doesn’t like strangers” he said, walking over to the other side.

“Since she’s bein difficult y’gonna have T’help. C’mere” he waved her over and she followed. “So when I push it up, just grab the saddle pad and make sure it doesn’t move, yea?” He asked.

“The fuck is a saddle pad, dude- I know my way around a kitchen not a fuckin horse stable.” She looked at the many different layers the horse was already wearing.

“Alright. So this,” he lifted the cloth, “is her blanket. Keeps her core warm. And beneath it” he pats the pad “this is her saddle pad, it makes it more comfortable. So our bones aren’t like..diggin in her back and shit. Also shock, when she jumps the foam of it helps our weight disperse. The saddle is so big and heavy I can’t keep the pad still at the same time, so just hold it f’me,” he took her hand, guiding it to where he wanted her to hold.

She felt her heartbeat quicken, his hands were so large and calloused on top of her own. She nodded wordlessly, keeping her eyes trained on where she was meant to be holding and focusing on keeping it steady as he went back around and carefully lifted up the heavy saddle with a grunt, laying it over the horses back.

“Jesus- how much can this thing carry” Syd asked.

“Well she is a mare, she weighs about…mmm- 1900? She can comfortably hold about 400 pounds for a decent distance but she can’t do that for hours and hours at a time. We together can’t be more then 300, and her gear is less then 100 pounds. Were just goin f’r a quick ride, I gotta get to therapy at 3” he explained as he buckled on her saddle.

“Ah. So you’ve been memorizing horse information instead of creating recipes? I figured when I got here you’d have gone nuts by now without being in a kitchen so long” she gently touched the horses mane as she spoke.

“Maybe. Well…I am kinda goin crazy? But I can’t…let it out?” He chuckled a bit “does that make sense? Nights are a little hard before my sleep meds kick in but that just says I haven’t done enough that day” he got up. “So y’gettin up first since I’m sittin in back” he explained.

“Oh…uh- ok how do I?” She asked looking up at the at least 7 foot tall animal.

“Y’not gonna be able to do it alone. C’mere” he told her. She comes over and looks at him.

“How the fuck do you do this?” She looked up at the saddle that was at the top of her head before looking back at him.

“So-“ he snorts a laugh at her wide confused expression. “She’s not gonna like you trying to roll up on her back, and I don’t want you t’get thrown off, she can be moody with new people. I almost broke my shoulder my first time trying to ride her” he said and she crossed her arms slightly.

“So how. How do I get up there?” She asked. He pulled out a step stool, setting it next to the horse and getting up on the third step.

“I’m giving you a lift. Arms up” he said with a playful smirk.

“No- no way- Carmen that’s too high. You’ll drop me!!” She took a step back, feeling slightly nervous.

“I won’t because I’ll bribe her Syd. C’mere” he pulled a pack of peep marshmallows out of his pocket and the horse nearly starts dancing.

“Carm- what the fuck is happening?” She asked and Carmy chuckled.

“Bow. Cmon Syd wants t’ride. Bow and you’ll get y’treat star.” He told the horse.

It obediently bowed down and before Syd could process what was happening, Carm was scooping her up beneath her arms Syd squealed in surprise. “Oh my GOD WHY ARE YOU PICKING ME UP!” She shrieked, wiggling in his arms.

“open y’legs! Cmon! she’s gonna get up!!!” Carmen laughed holding her up higher. Syd finally obeyed and he gently plopped her on the first saddle. “Good girl” he told the horse, feeding her the marshmallow and putting the packet in his pocket again before swiftly getting on behind Syd.

“Alright. Hard part done.” He reached around her waist, and she lifted her arms slightly.

“What- can you tell me what’s going on? I’m a horse virgin!” She said, and they both went quiet for a moment, before cracking up laughing. Syd leaned to her left slightly as she tried catching her breath, grabbing the rein for stability and tugging.

Star took off sprinting, Syd screamed in surprise, her body going tight with fear. Carmen quickly wrapped his arms around Syds waist protectively, tugging on the reigns “WOOOOAH!” He called to Star and she quickly came to a stop.

“Stand.” He told the horse firmly.

“What the fuck Carm I thought she was trained!” Syd exclaimed, gripping onto his forearms for dear life.

“I gotchu, you think I’d let her kick you off?” He tightened his arms around her. Carmen swore his heart was thumping so hard that she felt it on her shoulder blade.

“Also when she moves it’s hard to keep still.” She said nervously.

“Don’t worry, I gotchu, Syd. Lean into me, if our weight is centered then it’ll be easier for all 3 of us” he gently pushed at her stomach.

She leaned back into his broad chest, “see” he said softly. He was lucky the angle didn’t allow for her to see him, because his face was bright red, And having her body pressed against his…was making him flush somewhere else too.

He clicked his tongue and Stardust started walking again, at an easy comfortable trot. “This…is ok.” She said, much more comfortable now.

“I’m gonna take you t’one of my favorite spots.” He said, pulling on the reins to the left lightly so she would follow the left trail.

“Wow, already sharing secret spots huh? I think this therapist may just be Doctor of the year I don’t even think I’ve seen your favorite Chicago spots” she teased.

Carm laughed a bit, he felt so much lighter with Syd around. And life had been lighter ever since he got here.

“How is…uh- how is it back home?” He cleared his throat lightly. It was something that had being weighing on him. Yes, he was here, he was doing the thing. He was making Sugar happy. He was making Syd happy…but he would go back, at some point.

And his biggest fear was things will just go right back. He won’t have this outlet, he won’t have sunset rides with Stardust to ease his mind. He won’t have the cows happily running up to him and greeting him when he was the first one to bring out a bale of hay. He felt like if he was here, he may have the confidence to tell Syd how he feels. But back home? It was another life.

“Fine..things are..y’know. The usual shit. But nothing bad, no one’s getting locked in any freezers if that’s what you mean” she said playfully.

Carm rolled his eyes with a light smile. “Mmhmm. So the restaurant is-“

“Is fine.” She said. “I’d have told you. You know that.” She said and he nodded a bit.

“I know she scared you back there…but it’s pretty fun to go fast. You wanna try?” He asked.

She shifted a bit uncomfortably, her hands tightening around his arms that were holding the reins around her waist. “Uhh…maybe? Are you sure we won’t fall off?” She questioned.

“I’m sure. Here you can be the one to control it. Start light ok? With your legs.” He gently ran his hands down her thighs to right below her knees “here” he said softly, squeezing the flesh gently so she wouldn’t have to lean and look. “With that part of your legs, give her a little squeeze. But really light, or we’ll take out of here like a bat out of hell” he held around her waist again, securely holding the reins.

“Mmhmm” she said, she was beginning to feel hot- and not because she’d done any hard work in regards to getting the horse ready.

“Alright. Whenever you’re ready, you’re the boss” he said the last part softly in her ear. If it wasn’t for her jacket, he would see the goosebumps that had risen on her arms. She nodded quickly, staring straight ahead and trying to maintain her composure.

“So I just?” She squeezed gently and the horse picks up her speed slightly. “Oh…ok” she said.

“Told y’she was trained” Carmy teased and she rolls her eyes.

“Mmm you’ve done a very good job, bribing this horse with peeps. The staff know you do this?” She asked. Carmy snorted a laugh

“No. But she’s healthy. Made sure. She only gets one or 2 if she doesn’t listen.” He admitted.

She shook her head with a smile. “And how’d you find this out, Carm?” She leaned into him once more.

“I…” he laughed a bit, his chest vibrating with the movement and it made her heart warm.

“I uh…spent a few days in the library here. Reading up. After she threw me off. It’s all about trust with em. So I never lied to ‘er and I’ve never done something she didn’t expect because I always try to warn her.” He said, pulling her reigns a bit tighter.

“This is like a joyride Syd cmon, I said fast not an evening stroll.” He teased.

“Fine. Mister horse master- show me what Miss Stardust can do.” She said.

With 2 kisses and a quick tap of his heel, they were off like a rocket. He held Syd steady, being sure she wouldn’t have to do most the work of holding herself center as he gripped each reign with the opposite hand, holding them taught so Star knew to keep going.

Syd laughed, the wind flicking her dark curls all around. He wished she could see her amused expression. “Holy shit this is the best!” She shouted over the loud thuds of Stars hoofbeats.

“I know right! Can you believe she can go faster?” He said, holding his knees taut around her hips to keep her from sliding.

“Okay we are not! This is fine!” She said and sat up a bit “are we going into the-” She asks as Star begins to barrel through a creek, the freezing water spraying up and around them getting them slightly wet, the freezing water splashing from their calves up to their cheeks.. “CARMY!” She screams through laughter.

He could barely catch his breath as he laughed so hard his stomach and ribs ached. “I’m sorry!! Syd! Oh god-“ he chuckled “woah girl- woah” he called to the course and she slowed down once again to a stop.

“Fuck-“ Carmen chuckled “you okay?” He asked, picking a wet leaf from her jacket and throwing it to the forest floor.

“Yeah- I’m.. I’m fine. That was really fun actually. C’mon I wanna see the spot” she said and took it upon herself to tug the reins so Star would take off again

“Shi-it!” He quickly finds his balance, “warn me!! Oh god I almost flew off!!” He told her.

“You think I’d let her throw you off?” She mimics him from earlier and he takes the chance to playfully pinch her waist

“Yes because who’s in back and who’s in front?” He wrapped his arms around her again, taking the reins from her grasp. “Your reign privileges have been revoked for this riding lesson, Ms.Adamu”

She laughed a bit “I’ll earn them back. Don’t worry” she mused.

“Mmm we need to talk about more shit before I just literally hand the reins over. Coulda spooked her and we’d be fuckin dead.” he angled the outside reigns so she’d slow down as they came to the clearing.

“Here we are” he hopped off, raising his arms to help her down.

She carefully reached out for him and he lifted her off, gently setting her down. “Holy fuck Carmy” she turned around, watching the waterfall cascade down over the rocks.

“Right! Told you. It’s a fire spot” he went over to one of the rocks he usually sat at, plopping down and taking out a cigarette. “Oh- shit- can’t have y’running off” he told Stardust and chuckled, leaving the cigarette between his lips as he walked over to her, guiding her over to the tree, and hooking her right rein around a branch before sitting back down.

“Yeah…I can’t remember the last time I went somewhere so…” she trailed off, looking at all the trees and running water.

“Green?” Carmy lit his cigarette, taking a drag. “Not packed with smog? Somewhere that doesn’t smell like shit.” He said as he exhaled.

“…yeah” she said and laughed a bit. “Yeah. Guess that’s it.” She came and sat next to him. “What did you mean about her getting scared?” She asked curiously.

“Oh- a scared horse will fucking kill you. Not on purpose, but they’re big and pure muscle, and will do anything to get away from danger. I scared the shit out of her one time, that was it. Dislocated my shoulder 8th day here. Doing that hurts like a bitch by the way.” He rolled his shoulder gently.

“How’d you manage that? God I knew you were shit at chatting up girls but she dislocated your shoulder?” She teased.

He rolled his eyes with a playful smile, taking another drag. “Yes, I was fuckin around on the trail, dunno why- but there was this branch sticking out so I grabbed it, it snapped, she fuckin reeeared dude. I flew back so hard. My back might still be bruised I’m not sure. Still hurts a little to laugh” he said.

“You better have seen a doctor” she said.

“Ohhh silly Syd.” He sighed, a puff of smoke filling the air in front of him. “We aren’t allowed to refuse treatment here. If you get hurt, and you refuse to get help, it’s considered self harm, which leads to them believing you have suicidal ideation, which leads to you being locked in the actual nuthouse. So yes. I willingly went to the doctor daily for a week. And now, I’m being checked on once a week. So yeah. Oh and therapy daily. And every day I’m given my meds and someone checks over ‘pre-existing injuries’ which that is now considered. So yeah. I’m good. I’m fuckin fine as fine can be.” He said.

“Awww poor little chef, being taken care of so well that’s so hard isn’t it?” She teased and he gives her a playful glare, but couldn’t help but crack a smile when he realized she was smiling too.

“I was being taken care of fine at home by myself but you and my sister just had to ship me off after one tiny accident” he leaned back on his hand, taking another drag of his cigarette.

“It stops becoming an accident when you didn’t care, Carm. You didn’t care. It didn’t phase you. You weren’t even…you weren’t even scared. Just because you didn’t do it on purpose doesn’t mean you did the sane thing which would have been doing everything you could to not let something like that happen.” She said, her tone suddenly serious.

He looked down at his lap, swallowing thickly. He suddenly felt all of the armor he’d spent the last 31 days chipping at, slowly start to meld back together and shell him back in at the shame the whole situation was making him feel.

“I have nightmares…you know. About it. What happened” she said quietly, and he could physically feel his heart ripping open.

The only sound between them was the bubbling stream, and the sounds of their even breaths.

“I’m sorry.” He said quietly, gaze fixed on his lap knowing he would burst into tears at the admission she’d been so deeply plagued by something he’d done, if he had looked at her.

“I know” was all she said, gently resting her hand on top of his. He felt the same fireworks exploding in his chest that he only ever felt when she was around.

“Do you um…” he clears his throat and shook his head, embarrassed by the question plaguing his mind. “Never mind it’s..it’s stupid.” He removed his hand, putting his cigarette in it and resting the hand opposite of her on the rock.

“That usually means it’s not stupid. What?” She coaxed, bumping his knee with hers gently.

“It’s stupid” he said again, shrugging his shoulders.

“It can’t be stupider then asking me what UPS means” She said playfully. He rolled his eyes, smiling and looking over at her.

“And what if it is?” He questioned.

“I would be..worried they’re giving you a bad concoction of meds that’s turning your glorious chef brain in to Swiss cheese” she teased

He snorts a laugh. “I was gonna ask..if you wanted to cook..t’night. My cabin…it uh- has a kitchen? I haven’t cooked in a month. They give us food so I haven’t really bothered but…seeing you makes me miss it more, I guess” he blushed, looking back down at his lap.

“Well obviously. Not gonna let you eat whatever bullshit they’ve been giving you while I’m around.” She said and he shook his head, meeting her gaze once more with a playful smirk.

“Maybe you should check in. My therapist says it’s bad apparently to feel ‘responsible for others’ - says it’s a ‘subconscious self harming behavior’ “ he teased.

She smiled a bit. “Okay- say I do. How about, I check in now, we shoot the shit for what- eleven more days- then, you go back home- and see how stressful it is in that restaurant when one of your hands is basically missing” she plucked the cigarette bud he’d forgotten about from between his fingers before it burnt him, flicking it into the creek.

“You know that’s the first time I’ve seen you smoke- other then…me like checking on you when you were about to explode at work. But you’ve never…pulled one out and smoked it I guess” she said, pulling her knees to her chest and resting her cheek on her forearm as she looked at him.

“Oh…” he said, pulling one of his legs up and resting his arm on it. “Didn’t realize you noticed” he said, brushing some dirt off his jeans.

“I notice a lot of stupid shit about you, it’s kinda annoying honestly.” She said without thinking, her eyes widening when she realized and she looked the other way, resting her other cheek on her knee and squeezing her eyes shut.

Why would you ever say that?! She asked herself internally.

“Oh?” He said again, smiling a bit. “You do?” He questions, but that was as far as he’d push.

“Mhm” was all she responded. Carmys phone started buzzing in his pocket and he pulled it out in case it was one of the ‘base keepers’ they called them. Carmy rather call them babysitters. He knew what they were for, being sure if they were out of sight too long they were making sure they could still get ahold of them.

He sighed in relief when he saw it was just his 2:40 alarm. “Gotta go” he stood up, offering his hand to Syd. “Like- now. Or my ass is getting chewed out.”

The ride back to the cabins was mostly silent. He had no stool this time, so he had to pick up Syd essentially by the ass and gently place her on Stars back so she didn’t get spooked.

He was embarassed as fuck that the tiny action had the crotch region of his jeans tightening more then was casually explainable. Thank god no one was around to see him awkwardly hop in the way of his semi hard third leg down his left pant leg, grunting but covering it with a dry cough when she settled her ass back into him to ‘center their gravity’

Syd absolutely felt the firmness pressing into her ass. She thought it was a bit funny, but also brushed it off to the strange friction that came with riding a horse. She couldn’t allow herself to fully believe his teenage like excitement was due to her, or she’d go insane.

Carmy dropped Syd off at his cabin, giving her the key and telling her he’d put up Stardust and be back by 5, she would be blushing if it weren’t for her mahogany complexion at the domesticity of it all - er what she could imagine domesticity with Carmy would feel like.

Her panties were also soaked through from the feeling of his enormous length pressed into the curve of her ass - the entire way back - but she just chalked that up to not getting laid for a few months, and misreading his natural arousal for him being horny- she quickly pushed the thought down and just chalked it up to the horse. Because guys get hard when they ride horses…right? Right?!

Carmen arrived to therapy extremely frustrated, and extremely ready to talk. He sat down in his regular spot in the back, tapping his knee nervously and covering his crotch with his hands. Luckily, thinking about his mother was enough to make him soft nearly instantly so he had that to thank her for at least.

“Alright guys!” Julienne, the usual Friday therapist came in, sitting in her spot in the circle. “Who is up today! We are-“ she looks at her iPad “oh! Yes this is another OP class, so- no pressure but, I wanna hear what’s goin on!” She crossed her legs.

Julie was far from his favorite therapist, at Blue Lotus. But he wasn’t his least favorite. So he would still talk. He cleared his throat, raising his hand slightly.

“Carmy?! What a treat! Okay what’s up” she grabbed her little stylus pencil. He bit the inside of his lip nervously. He despised how casual she tried to make this all feel.

“Uh…so- my um…business partner, she came to see me. I guess I haven’t been…keeping touch? Enough? She just said she was worried…” he cleared his throat again, gaze fixed on his lap. “And uh…I’m startin’ t’-t’realize stuff?” He sniffled nervously, rubbing his mouth with slightly clammy, nervous hands.

“She uh..” he chuckled a bit. “She…she just…showed up. Didn’t hear shit from ‘er. She probably knew that I’d uh…I’d tell ‘er no?” He finally meets the gaze of Julie.

“Okay. You know guests are allowed right? Like- during the visiting hours, 6am to 11pm, no fraternizing between patients but-“ Carmen cuts her off

“We aren’t - no. Not fraternizing” He shook his head. “But uh…today? We were- we were sitting. This spot, near uh, Jupiter point? On the north side. And I had this- this urge T-to tell her…everything.” He shook his head, looking at the floor again.

“So…you wanted to tell her you love her?” Jesse, one of the guys he’d had lunch with a few times piped up.

“T’be honest, I don’t know.” Carmen said honestly, looking at him.

“Well what does it feel like?” Jesse asked, sitting up a bit.

“What? Like- what does what feel like?” Carmen asked curiously.

“Her. Being with her. Talking to her? Inside. Like. Your chest. Your skin?” He questioned.

“Uh…” Carmen sat back, swallowing thickly and crossing his arms over his chest. He thought for a moment.

“Hot. I get hot. All over. My chest feels tight but - but good? Like- a hug almost. And then…when she…” he blushed, looking down with a shy smile. “When she touches me” he shook his head slightly. “When she touches me it’s like um.. fireworks? Like fireworks beneath my skin.” He chuckled a bit at how cheesy it sounded.

“And you haven’t fucking nailed her?” Jessie asked plainly.

Carmen furrowed his brows, glaring at him. “No” he clenched his jaw “I haven’t.” He snips.

“Dude- you are- pussy whipped with no pussy?! You- you love her, Carmen. You love this chick. I feel like I’m looking in a weird straight mirror - the first time-“ he laughed a bit “the first time I kissed a guy- god. He was so hot. But I had no idea! I had no idea. I really thought that I was just-“ he shook his head “that I was just wanting to befriend him? Or something? But like- I wanted to fuck him. And when I did kiss him? Something unlocked in my brain dude. It was like…like a whole new world. I felt like I knew - I knew what love could feel like? Just ‘cause of that one kiss “ he shrugged.

Carmen looked at him, arms crossed, trying to absorb everything he was saying even though every fiber of his former self was screaming to take it with nothing more than a grain of salt.

“Kiss her dude. Kiss her.” Jesse said and sat back in his chair.

“Well. Although, consensual sexual instances are against the code of conduct to discuss - I am very proud to see you two coming out of your shells. Has anyone else felt… confused in their romantic endeavors and would like to share?” Julie asked.

Carmen crossed his arms tighter, looking down at his lap. This was quite unusual for him, he was one of the patients to only add what he had to to be credited during inpatient, and during outpatient - only spoke when he really and honestly had to.

“Uh-“ the super tall girl, Shayna sits up. Carmen was never really sure why she was here. She looked…perfect by all means. Perfect skin, perfect nails, pretty face, long blonde hair, a perfect body by girl standards. Or at least what Carmen had understood of them.

“Not really the same.. but before I came out? I like…I would uh buy…girl clothes. That I liked. For my girlfriends at the time…” she blushed “and um.. I realized after a while that I liked them. And I wasn’t just..wanting to see my girlfriend in them. And like- it’s not the exact same, but when he said… about how Jesse realized he wanted the guy. That’s how I felt when I finally tried the clothes on” she shrugged.

Carmen was…aghast. He just simply stared at her. He’d never met- or thought- he’d ever met a trans person before today. But…Shayna?

Well- he was wrong because he had met her, they actually knew each other fairly well as far as patients go, she joined the program when he did. When they first met, she’d made a joke about how they were the tallest girl and shortest guy in the class, so that meant they were bound to be friends, since opposites attract - and that earned a chuckle out of him before his meds had even fully evened out.

“I love the cis-and-confused look- it’s cute” she said and laughed a bit. Carmen blushed, smiling a bit.

“Not confused- well, maybe. Maybe a little. Y’Just so…dainty? I dunno..” he shrugged.

“In case you haven’t noticed- mr.little man syndrome- you’re only one out with the cows doing the hay on time in the morning. Ninty percent of the group is your version of dainty ” Jesse teased.

“Jesse” Julie gives him the look. “I’d assume that means- the rest of you that aren’t out helping with the bales- are scraping out the cow pens? Since Carmen is doing all the hard work according to you.”

“I’m not girl- fuck no! The second I got out of inpatient house arrest? I walked my happy ass down to Walmart and bought me some blackout curtains. I recommend those to all of you! Oh my god and some ear plugs!! The stupid fucking roosters! Worst 15 days of my lifeee! I’m never coming back here peace and love to you all though. Truly. Can’t stand this cow shit stank ass place.” Shayna said dramatically, causing Carmen to chuckle a bit.

He had loved her boldness since they’d met. If Shayna didn’t want to do something- she wasn’t doing it. He learned that the day the staff tried to force her on anti-depressants. One of the main therapists got a Wellbutrin straight to the eye, they never attempted that battle the same way again.

“We know Shayna you aren’t shoveling scat, princesses don’t do that” Jesse mocked her valley girl tone.

“Okay! Okay. Alriiiight! Back on track- done with the bickering!” Julie said. “Now that open call is over let’s move on to breakthroughs. This issss-“ she looks at her iPad “ah- yes! D group. So. That makes it-“ he checks her watch “ah- right. 11 days! How are your light tunnel projects going?” She questioned.

Carmen’s chest tightened, but not in the Syd is smiling or he made Syd laugh way- in the - I haven't done something I was meant to do way.

The Light Tunnel project wasn’t hard. It was simply one thing you have done that you had wanted to do when you came into the program. And Carmy knew what his answer was,

Admit how he felt to Sydney.

Or, as his Therapist- Mandy told him ‘become more truthful with yourself and those you know about how you feel’ because “counting on someone to like him back would put him at square one” he had pretended to understand, but knew that he had to tell her and soon - or he was going to really go insane.

“ my light tunnel was to talk to my asshole father- but lucky for me I just caught wind the motherfucker finally died thank god. So by default I win and don’t have to be here anymore cause his abandonment was what fucked me up anyhow“ Shayna said jokingly, causing Carm to snort a laugh. He knew she was only joking about the leaving early part, not the father part. Her father was an even bigger piece of shit then Carmen’s was, he had come to learn.

“Mmm that isn’t how it works we know that Shayna. We’ll talk more about this in one to one “ Julie told her and Shayna crossed her long legs, looking out the window.

The last 20 minutes of the session Carmen sat silently, looking out the opposite window to Shayna, watching the horses running around in the field before they got called in for dinner and just spacing out, thinking about what he may say to Syd.

“Yo - Carm space cadet” Shayna said before kicking his boot he jumped a bit, looking up at them both and had realized the room since had cleared and Julie was preparing for her next session.

“Shit.” He said “how long have I been like…like that?” He asked, his cheeks feeling hot.

“It’s the OCD meds. They get you stuck in a happy thought loop sometimes. Are you just gonna sit here? You wanna do another hour of this with sniveling group a? They got here three days ago.” Jesse said. Carm shook his head, getting up.

“No- no sorry” he said starting with them outside. Shayna laughed a bit

“You were thinking of screwing that business partner aren’t you. “ she said, causing Carmys cheeks to go pinker.

“Shayna shut up!” Jesse scolded, pushing her shoulder lightly.

“Awwww carmyyy are your feelings hurt little buddy? Do you need a hug? Jesus men are such pussys” she pushed open the doors of the therapy cabin for them.

“Let me see pictures of this hot chick. If you don’t fuck her I will and I bet I’d do a better job” Shayna teased as they started heading back towards the cabins.

Carmen couldn’t even process what she said as he felt his breath get caught in his chest, he saw her. She was sitting on the porch of his cabin, criss-cross in one of the rocking chairs as she writes in her notebook. He couldn’t help but stop and stare at the way the setting sun hit her bronze skin, her curls casting intricate patterned shadows on the wood. He felt his heart pick up, his chest squeezing in that way, the way that only happened when he saw her.

Shayna and Jesse stopped after a few moments when they realized Carm had gotten stuck behind. They both follow his gaze carefully to see what he was so fixed on, like a trance.

“Holy fuuuck!!! Holy fuck how did I get this lucky!! She’s here? She’s here still?!” Shana asked excitedly, “oh my god- you’re getting laid- tonight” she excitedly skips up to the cabin and Syd looks up, locking eyes with her before seeing Carmen just a few paces behind. “I’m Shayna! Do you and Carm wanna hang out with us tonight?”

➵ 𝐍𝐞𝐱𝐭 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 ♡♡♡

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tohruies · 2 months ago

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my sweet tohru !!! i’m so glad you liked it ahgjhshd i hit post and abandoned my phone because i was so nervous and my heart was beating so fast 🥹🥹 thank you so much for your kind words, but i do not deserve such praise!! because it is You who is so kind and wonderful and you deserve to be loved and have nice things, so there really isn’t even any need to thank me ♡ you will Not be receiving any kofi or paypal hahaha honestly it helped me practice a bit and get back into drawing so i should be the one thanking you :3 i am very sorry again for being so so late ough .. you are not!!! indebted to me at all. i wanted to do this for you because i wanted to repay all the kindness you have always shown me. thank you again for everything you have done—for leaving me sweet tags and comments, just saying hi, inspiring me to be kinder, and for simply being here. i have been so lucky to know you and somehow become your friend. you never fail to make me smile and i can only hope that i can do the same for you 🥺

also please don’t worry, i did not lose any sleep over it because i would’ve been awake regardless (i always go to bed very late because after midnight is my me time, so i just used the opportunity to make something for you :3) so diluc does not have to keep me hostage in bed heh 🤗 i am hugging you so so tight telepathically i love you!!! 🐈‍⬛♥️🦌

p.s. i am loving this new kaomoji you’re using LOL ༼;´༎ຶ ۝ ༎ຶ༽ <- literally me whenever you interact with me /pos

my precious saki!! (๑•́ω•̀๑) i am and will still be wracking my brain for a long while to figure out how i can adequately thank you for that beautiful piece of art oh my gosh!!!! 🥺 wah… you Do deserve all the praise in the world!! for not only your talent but i think more importantly your kindness and thoughtfulness ): i wish you wouldn’t put yourself down like that /gen /aff because the way you hold onto your tenderness no matter how the world lets you down is something so admirable and lovely 🥺💗 i want to be like that!!!! i look up to you so much Sobbles, because there are so many things to love about you!!!!!!!! the way You love and the way you care and the way you are present ): it’s a very beautiful thing to be able to do it in the capacity you do, and i only wish the universe will be kinder to you for all that you do 🌷 love you so so much and of course i am hugging you back super duper tiiiiight!! WAH! ༼;´༎ຶ ۝ ༎ຶ༽ <- me right now & when awea does anything Ever /pos. i have so much heart for you!!!! diluc is so lucky indeed to be loved and cherished by you!! 🥰

#bisous!#my sweet saki hanajima 🥀#squinting at you… i Will locate your kofi……. 🫵 or at the very least i will get you back!! you are not safe!!!!!! /lh

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tojiscrack · 2 months ago

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Omg I actually don't know why I'm so nervous to write and send this ask because it probably won't even be seen- idk- I'm just in the presence of such awesomeness rn 🤧

ANYWAYS, I'm literally such a HUGEEE fan of LL 🥹 It's my whole life and I love the way you write 🫶 Your characters, your story, just everything is pure perfection ❤️ I ACTUALLY CONSUME ALL THE FAN WORKS TOO like you've created such an amazing community I swear and everyone seems so lovely - it's honestly delicious.

SO I actually really wanted to share some hcs for your LL OCs because I love all of them, they're so mwah! BUT I PROBABLY GOT THEIR CHARACTERS SO WRONGG SO THAT'S...NOT 😀 BUT I JUST FELT LIKE I HAD TO HEAR YOUR THOUGHTS ON THEM ANYWAYS 😢 (I am so sorry. I actually cannot write anything to save my life)

OK AND ALSO I see all these incredible artworks and I would honestly contribute BUT I can't draw 😔 AT ALL. And I feel like your fic is too good for that. But I would absolutely LOVE to do a silly cosplay of Kai or something BECAUSE I JUST LOVE HIM AND I FEEL LIKE THAT'D BE SO FUN but I wasn't sure if that was okay?? Idk maybe I'm just super worried for no reason but I just had to check because I want to be respectful and I don't want to share/post anything without asking first 😓

(why does this feel so short and long at the same time- I WILL WRAP THIS UP)

ERM- So do you think it'd be ok to cosplay him and put it on TT or I can put it on Insta if you prefer??? I really don't know sbsj

I THINK THAT'S REALLY ALL 😀 But GOOD LUCK WITH YOUR EXAMS I FULLY BELIEVE IN YOU 🙏 Make sure you don't forget to take breaks and eat and sleep whilst you're busy studying 😢

THANK YOU <33

‘don't know why I'm so nervous to write and send this ask because it probably won't even be seen-‘ — well you must be new here 🤨 i never ignore any of my asks, it does just take me some time to get through them all 😭

but we’re here now 😋

‘I'm just in the presence of such awesomeness rn’ — i know 😋

HAHA JK STOPPP YOU’RE FLATTERING ME 😭❤️ I’M AWESOME FOR SURE BUT THAT DOESN’T LESSEN HOW AWESOME YOU MUST BE TOO <333

but i’m soooo pleased you like LL as much as you do 😩 i love writing it and answering asks and talking and AKISJSJS, you’re the sweetest person ever, truly

the works that the community have also provided are amazing, you’re so right about that 😋 i’m so glad you’re part of it now, welcome! <3

‘you've created such an amazing community I swear and everyone seems so lovely’ — firstly, THEY AREEE, idk how i got such a beautiful community of people all at once, it’s genuinely so refreshing like idek how to describe it

but i have to correct you. i didn’t create this community. i made LL, that’s for sure, but the community being its wonderful self is ALLL them (and now you! 🥹). i’m so thankful you have no idea, like UGHHH 😩❤️

‘SO I actually really wanted to share some hcs for your LL OCs because I love all of them, they're so mwah!’ — 😧

OH MY GOSHHHH, YES YES I’M SO EXCITED YESSS

‘BUT I PROBABLY GOT THEIR CHARACTERS SO WRONGG SO THAT'S…’ — THEY ARE WHATEVER YOU WANT THEM TO BE HAHA, YOU’RE ALL GOOD 😭👍🏽

let’s go through them <3

#1: Half of Miss B's wardrobe is either in #ab06d4 OR #ab868 EITHER OF THESE SPECIFIC COLOURS

miss b, just in case anyone was wondering, isn’t exactly a LL oc. she’s the baker girl from nanami’s memory in canon, but gege hates putting names to the women he introduces (aHEM mamaguro 🤨) so i had to just give her a cute little nickname 😭

so honestly, this hc passes bc i’m not gege and have no idea what miss B would wear HAHA ✅

#2: Either Kai's parents are super supportive or they're "it's just a phase" people

random kai lore (i see how you used the name he prefers HAHAHA, he’d love you for that) but he doesn’t have a dad 😀

i don’t… know… if… it’s telling… but…

yeah.

you can probably imagine why he left. and his mum initially thought it was a phase, till it just kept going. now she’s an exhausted woman who just wants a normal son 😭

#3: When Y/N's dad leaves for work, when he looks at souvenirs he's like "yep, I just know [character] would love that" and does those dad chuckles to himself YK WHAT I MEANNDJJSJS

ABSOLUTELY ✅

pretty sure it was mentioned in one of the chapters before (can’t remember which one) but he brings back souvenirs from his trips and brings lots of stuff for megumi - since they both have a common interest: animals.

you depict him so well in ur mind, i’m thankful 😭

#4: When Chad is "popular" with the girls (because yk average jock core or whatever) but he always plays it down and he's way too nice about it even if he's not into them

this hc passes as canon too! ✅

we’ve established how he’s not the typical mean-guy-chad we see in those 2000s films, which mc loves commenting on. he’s just a chill guy 🤷🏽‍♀️

#5: All the kindergarten teachers/staff are still recovering from Y/N like they still tell the mini mercupine tales sometimes (but....in a less traumatising way)

oh i hadn’t thought of this…

✅ LL canon :)

they definitely think of mercupine at times. and i have a rough draft of an interaction they have in the future…

but the mercupine tales? absolutely. they’d be examples to the next generation of kindergarteners

#6: At some point one of the characters that probably wouldn't ever (e.g. Y/N's mother or Miss B) have actually referred to Megumi as "porcupine", just because of Y/N calling him that, PURELY ACCIDENTALLY AS WELL just a slip of the tongue or somethin

THIS HAS DEFINITELY HAPPENED 😭✅

it could’ve been any of the characters tho, since ‘porcupine’ is so commonly used. but just wait till it’s used by the wrong people…

#7: Oliver is always out of some kind of loop. He's that one person that doesn't check their phone enough or something and misses HALF of the stuff going on

i didn’t have a story background for oliver, honestly. my main ocs are mc, mc’s parents/family, chad, malakai, and any frequently-mentioned extras you might meet later on.

so whatever you wanna depict oliver as, it’s ✅ canon to me too 😋

‘I see all these incredible artworks and I would honestly contribute BUT I can't draw AT ALL’ — honestly, don’t even sweat it, drawing is a SKILL that only the most patient people have 😭

‘I would absolutely LOVE to do a silly cosplay of Kai or something BECAUSE I JUST LOVE HIM AND I FEEL LIKE THAT'D BE SO FUN but I wasn't sure if that was okay??’ — GIRL IT’S FINE??? 😭

this is the first time someone’ll ever cosplay a LL character anyway and i’m ??? like levitating and so overwhelmed bc i didn’t even think of this being a thing? 😧

GO FOR IT OMG, and if you don’t mind, tag me too! <3 i’d loveee to see how you do it (i’m sure you’ll nail it, he’s just a typical crazy emo HAHAH)

you can post it on any social you want. tho if it’s on any social other than tumblr, you’re gonna have to drop by and lmk you’re user bc i don’t have a tt that’s not my private one haha 😭 and now it’s my time to ask if you’d let me link it on the LL q&a page here. it’s where i attach all the community stuff for the fic :)

TY FOR THIS LONG MESSAGE IT WAS SO JUICY AND I LOVED IT OSHAJBSJWJE TYSM FOR YOUR LOVE AND SUPPORT, ILYSM YOU HAVE NO IDEA 🥹❤️

#liar liar asks!#so overwhelmed with love rn #i just came back from a parent meeting with my tutor about my shittyyy attendance #this made me happy again #you guys know what time it is (again)#EVERYONE WELCOME A NEW LL MEMBER #CLAP #👏#APPLAUD HER AND TREAT HER WELL #this community keeps growing and it’s making me sksnksjwjs 🥹

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unitchiefs-blackbirdphoenix · 10 months ago

Text

17x06 Reaction/Spoilers Pt. 1 (aka the Jemily Episode of S17/Of All Time)

TW: not much however, there is a blood/gunshot wound warning (around 03:20-03:46) and drug use (edibles in each jemily scene pretty much)

Also if you want my jemily watch thoughts, I bolded them in this post haha (also thanks to @blackbirdsaltzman for our predictions for jemily stuff this ep haha!) I had to split this into two posts bc I have so many thoughts about this ep especially with jemily haha

Tara and Rossi teaming up together again!

Voit's cell

LUKE! MY BOY!

Tara's voice omg 😭

Noooo nooo omg Emily's singing 😭😭

Fuck it's not what we think!!

Voit fuck off!

You let go of her you fucking son of a bitch

Emily's singing is breaking my heart fuck nooooo

I know it's a dream but noooo Emily's pained singing broke me 😭

Why do they have to repeat her singing on the title card?? Damn it CME

Love Paget's voice but fuck

Aww Penelope leaving a bucket for Emily. She was drinking the other night hahaha

I've been wanting to say this since the promos came out but JJ's hair is wavy again, but her sleeves are still long and covering her hands :(

Rossi's seeing a bunch of Voits around the bullpen, including him as the others

Zach Gilford, I hate your character but I love you as an actor

JJ already being worried about Emily and her looking at Penelope

Not Emily's singing again fuck. I swear if her singing this song is foreshadowing the next eps...

JJ following Penelope to her lair. Omg JJ and Penelope's bestieism in this very lair 🥰 I miss them! It's like the early seasons them!

"You profiled that. I did not tell you" but JJ knows Emily inside and out hehe

JJ's little look at Penelope's keys

"Please I'm a mom. I've seen worse" hahahaha

Oh- Tyler's ex huh? Teresa Campos

Garvez!

Hahahaha Tyler calling Luke to talk to his ex

Exes in a room, whatcha gonna do

"She's the woman I dated.... right before you."

The walls shaking in Rossi's office. I'm sorry but the effects is kinda making me laugh

Tara being the second one to call out Rossi on not going to mandated trauma therapy lol

Tara just being there and holding Rossi's hand and talking him through 😭 I liked that moment

Tara's voice is so soothing, hold my hand next please.

Jemily scene #1 wooo!

JJ's cheetos obsession never dies! Also a mutual and I predicted before this ep on something that happens with JJ with these very things... 👀

Damn it. JJ I know you're making Emily comfortable but I needed the lights on!

The sneak peek!

Emily, although high, loves salt and vinegar chips!

Chopsticks is definitely going to be a jemily thing now. I may or may not have a one shot idea about that 👀

"Sooo what have you been drinking?" AJ's giggle is so cute

"Emily Elizabeth Prentiss, are you high?" "I'm not not high" "Oh my god" god I love them

"I didn't know super-hot Latina was your type. My name is Garcia..." Garcia um... I hate to tell you this...

Teresa's got a thing for army guys oh- is this... Luke's also an army guy

I have a feeling that they might set up Luke and Teresa together to try and stop Garvez from happening I fear 😔

Tommy Yates is all I could think of for Rossi rn

It's risky but I guess it might help Rossi

Tyler did that from last season and it got Penelope somewhat in trouble when her uh... predicament with him happened

"Message in a bottle" title mention!

"Sticky chemistry" omg 😭 Penelope

Teresa and Penelope and Luke and Tyler. Ooooh this should be fun!

Jemily scene #2

"I can feel your disappointed stare on my back" Emily knows her wife so well

JJ eating more... cheetos... omg girly you're gonna get fucked up

"Not disappointed, just... didn't know you smoked" JJ, you already knew Emily had some sort of a past with smoking and yet this surprises you? 😂 But also the way she sounded so amused with a huge smile like ahhhh I love them so much

When you need to focus or contemplate life, you just have a bag of cheese puffs with you, Emily? Like at any time JJ comes over to your place or something, you think she wouldn't try to go for that bag??

"tame the PR beast" liaison JJ hello??

JJ the voice of reason yesss

Not Emily talking about the Catcher in the Rye like she doesn’t know wtf that is omg 😭

"We need to talk"

Oh shit. "Why are the walls closing in?" JJ's realization and Emily's realization 👀

JJ's "Emily?"

That bag was like full earlier. Omg JJ 😭😭

Not Emily taking the last one omg. She said "solidarity" lol

"Those are edibles? 🥺" "You're gonna need to lie down" "Nooo" I just- they're so funny and adorable

JJ's on for a ride (or a trip if you will hehe)

Also I'm taking it that Emily has a bag of edible cheetos and a bag of regular cheetos, and hides the edibles from JJ hahaha

Back to Rossi. And this is the elevator scene from the trailer with the walls closing in on him. Ooooh JJ just said that earlier too

"past paramours" Penelope-

Pheromones? I swear... do not cm

Hahaha that's a long story Teresa

Luke and Tyler oooh 👀

Not to be encouraging ideas... but why do I have a feeling some people might start shipping/making fanfics of Tyler and Luke now? hahaha

Ooh they're bonding over movies now??? I might like this actually

I hate hearing Emily's pained voice :( hasn't she been through enough?? Apparently not in this season or ever

Tommy Yates

"Am I haunting you?" Yes

Subtext ok Elias

So only three people know about Gold Star: Voit, Doug, and possibly Gideon’s ex-wife?

Damn. "We build a profile" Zach Gilford

Sebastian Gasper from 17x03

Jemily scene #3

JJ is soooo out of it omg

Her little dopey (stoned) smile when she hears that Emily's reinstated as unit chief. JJ's still a supportive wife through her high world lol

JJ: "hell yeah let's goo🤘" that was 1000% AJ for sure like girl we know you've been high before irl hahaha

JJ already shaking her head and going "no" when Emily said she’s sending an email to reject the offer back

Gideon, Morgan, and Hotch mention

"the longer you stay in this job, the odds is that you're going to lose yourself or someone you love or your sense of honor. It just takes and takes and takes" Emily :(

Omg BAU-Gate mention!

Oh 😭 JJ's deep-seated fear is exactly what we thought. That Henry or his friends come across the website.

I appreciate the mention and I swear if it wasn't the website, I love AJ's delivery of "yeah I found out" like "yeah duh", that was kinda funny actually

"You know what bugs me the most, is that you- you didn't tell me." JJ wasn't mad at her (or maybe she was but not enough to hate her of course) but she was just more hurt that Emily hid it from her since she found out. JJ just wanted answers!

AJ's little shaking hand when JJ says "you didn't tell me."

"Did you think I couldn't handle it?" I had a feeling JJ would say this when she confronted Emily

"No, I knew you could handle it. That doesn't mean you had to." I know I saw some opinions on how Emily said that, but I don't think she made it about herself tbh. I think given their state of mind rn, Emily was trying to say she thought she could try to protect JJ by doing what she did. Ik there's been discourse on if Emily did the right thing or not and I don't wanna get into that either but I think if they were both sober, then it would've delved into a more emotional conversation about the website and Emily could've explained in full why she chose that decision. That's at least my thoughts on it for now.

"It's not about protecting us. It's about being honest with us. With me." JJ 😭 She was so hurt that Emily had to do that and just wanted her to be honest with her. I might have some thoughts on her saying this

Also the way she says "with me." Ohhh I love them 😭 Also the fact that JJ's more worried about Emily having to lie and hide from her. JJ hates when people lie and hide stuff from her (funny enough when she does the same lol)

#jemily #jennifer jareau #emily prentiss #criminal minds #criminal minds evolution #cme s17 spoilers #cme season 17 spoilers #cme 17x06 #hell yeah let's goooo 🤘

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myownwholewildworld · 8 months ago

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was it the ants biting her and the whole getting an infection from it??? That has to be it!

I’m so glad she’s immune tho, I was really hoping for it but can’t ever trust you lovely writers to not break our hearts hahaha! I’m so happy she’s better and her and Joel are still together 🥺

ANON MAY I KISS YOU?? PLEASE??

okay i’m going to take this opportunity to talk about something i’ve been dying to since "wherever you go" came to my mind 😭

short answer: YES!!!! 🙌

long answer: when i first posted chapter 1, i only thought of this story as a oneshot. and then i watched a video narrated by the lovely david attenborough where he talked about cordyceps (for those who don’t know, cordyceps is a real fungus!) and ants. my imagination started flowing! that was when i knew i wanted a protagonist who was immune, but unlike Ellie, it was not from birth, but acquired by being bitten by ants.

to summarise the video (this is the one, it’s super interesting so i do recommend watching it, the photography is incredible, like all bbc documentaries), cordyceps infects ants and can kill whole colonies, which is what happened with reader’s terrarium. she picked ants off her yard that had been exposed to cordyceps and brought them to her colony, dooming the whole community in the process of doing so. cordyceps attacks the brain’s motor ability of ants, forcing them to walk back to their colonies to die nearby and spread the spores of the fungus. from what i read too, the host is apparently still fully conscious of what they are doing, but because the fungus literally controls their motor skills, they are unable to stop themselves. this would mean that people infected with cordyceps would be aware of them attacking other people but couldn’t control themselves. how fucking wild is that???

in chapter 8, i wrote: “my parents didn’t even let me have a look at it [the terrarium].” the reason for this is that, if you’ve watched the video, reader would have seen fungi literally growing out of the dead ants. if i had mentioned that, it’d have been a straight giveaway that i wanted to avoid lol

so yes, basically reader is immune to cordyceps because she had already been exposed to it as a child when the ants bit her. it was a milder mutation of the infection though (milder but she still spent 2 weeks in hospital fighting for her life lol), which allowed her immune system to build up the immunity that would protect her in the future. being bitten now would have been like getting a top-up vaccine, hence why fighting the infection didn't take her 2 weeks this time round.

and that’s the story, sorry for all the yapping! but as a scientist myself, i found the whole thing so fascinating! 🤭

thank you very much for the lovely ask and for reading about these two lovebirds! i’m eternally grateful that you were happy about how the chapter turned out! it’s people like you who make me want to quit my job and just write till my fingernails bleed 🥰 much love and forehead kisses to you, lovely! 💖

#fic: wherever you go #asked and answered #anon #joel miller fanfiction #the last of us fanfic #cordyceps #writeblr #writers on tumblr

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gemsofgreece · 1 year ago

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Can you make a post about the evolution of Greek art from the ancient times until now in modern age?

Because we often talk about the evolution of art but unfortunately we don't appreciate after ancient times the other art movements Greece went through the centuries.

That’s true! I am sorry for taking ages to answer this but I don't know how it could take me less anyway hahaha I made this post with summaries about all artistic eras in Greek history. I have most of it under a cut because with the addition of pictures it got super long, but if you are interested in the history of art I recommend giving it a try! I took advantage of all 30 pictures that can be possibly attached in a tumblr post and I tried to cover as many eras and art styles as possible, nearly dying in the process ngl XD I dedicated a few more pictures in modern art, a) because that was the ask and b) because there is more diversity in the styles that are used and the works that are available to us in great condition in modern times.

History of Greek Art

Greek Neolithic Art (c. 7000 - 3200 BC)

Obviously, with this term we don’t mean there were people identifying as Greeks in Neolithic times, but it defines the Neolithic art corresponding to the Greek territory. Art in this era is mostly functional, there are progressively more and more defined designs on clay pots, tools and other utility items. Clay and obsidian are the most used materials.

Clay vase with polychrome decoration, Dimini, Magnesia, Late or Final Neolithic (5300-3300 BC).

Cycladic Art (3300 - 1100 BC)

The art of the Cycladic civilisation of the Aegean Islands is characterized by the use of local marble for the creation of sculptures, idols and figurines which were often associated to womanhood and female deities. Cycladic art has a unique way of incidentally feeling very relevant, as it resembles modern minimalism.

Early Cycladic II (Keros-Syros culture, 2800–2300 BC)

Minoan Art (3000-1100 BC)

The advanced Minoan civilisation of Crete island was projecting its confidence and its vibrancy through its various arts. Minoan art was influenced by the earlier Egyptian and Near East cultures nearby and at its peak it overshadowed the rest of the contemporary cultures and their artistic movements in Greece. Colourful, with numerous scenes of everyday life and island life next to the sea, it was telling of the society’s prosperity.

The Bull-leaping fresco from Knossos, 1450 BC.

Mycenaean Art (c. 1750 - 1050 BC)

Mycenaean Art was very influenced by Minoan Art. Mycenaean art diverged and distinguished itself more in warcraft, metalwork, pottery and the use of gold. Even when similar, you can tell them apart from their themes, as Mycenaean art was significantly more war-centric.

The Mask of Agamemnon in the National Archaeological Museum of Athens. The mask likely was crafted around 1550 BC so it predates the time Agamemnon perhaps lived.

Geometric Art (1100 - 700 BC)

Corresponding to a period we have comparatively too little data about, the Geometric Period or the Homeric Age or the Greek Dark Ages, geometric art was characterized by the extensive use of geometric motifs in ceramics and vessels. During the late period, the art becomes narrative and starts featuring humans, animals and scenes meant to be interpreted by the viewer.

Detail from Geometric Krater from Dipylon Cemetery, Athens c. 750 BC Height 4 feet (Metropolitan Museum, New York)

Archaic Art (c. 800 - 480 BC)

The art of the archaic period became more naturalistic and representational. With eastern influences, it diverged from the geometric patterns and started developing more the black-figure technique and later the red-figure technique. This is also the earliest era of monumental sculpture.

Achilles and Ajax Playing a Board Game by Exekias, black-figure, ca. 540 B.C.

Kroisos Kouros, c. 530 B.C.

Classical Art (c. 480 - 323 BC)

Art in this era obtained a vitality and a sense of harmony. There is tremendous progress in portraying the human body. Red-figure technique definitively overshadows the use of the black-figure technique. Sculptures are notable for their naturalistic design and their grandeur.

The Diskobolos or Discus Thrower, Roman copy of a 450-440 BCE Greek bronze by Myron recovered from Emperor Hadrian’s Villa in Tivoli, Italy. (British Museum, London). Photo by Mary Harrsch.

Terracotta bell-krater, Orpheus among the Thracians, ca. 440 BCE, The Metropolitan Museum of Art.

Hellenistic Art (323 - 30 BCE)

Hellenistic art perfects classical art and adds more diversity and nuance to it, something that can be explained by the rapid geographical expansion of Greek influence through Alexander’s conquests. Sculpture, painting and architecture thrived whereas there is a decrease in vase painting. The Corinthian style starts getting popular. Sculpture becomes even more naturalistic and expresses emotion, suffering, old age and various other states of the human condition. Statues become more complex and extravagant. Everyday people start getting portrayed in art and sculpture without extreme beauty standards imposed. We know there was a huge rise in wall painting, landscape art, panel painting and mosaics.

Mosaic from Thmuis, Egypt, created by the Ancient Greek artist Sophilos (signature) in about 200 BC, now in the Greco-Roman Museum in Alexandria, Egypt. The woman depicted in the mosaic is the Ptolemaic Queen Berenike II (who ruled jointly with her husband Ptolemy III) as the personification of Alexandria.

Agesander, Athenodore and Polydore: Laocoön and His Sons, 1st century BC

Greco-Roman Art (30 BC - 330 AD)

This period is characterized by the almost entire and mutually influential merging of Greek and Roman artistic expression, in light of the Roman conquest of the Hellenistic world. For this era, it is hard to find sources exclusively for Greek art, as often even art crafted by Greeks of the Roman Empire is described as Roman. In general, Greco-Roman art reinforces the new elements of Hellenistic art, however towards the end of the era, with the rise of early Christianity in the Eastern aka the Greek-influenced part of the empire, there are some gradual shifts in the art style towards modesty and spirituality that will in time lead to the Byzantine art. During this era mosaics become more loved than ever.

A mosaic from the island of Kos (the birthplace of Hippocrates) depicting Hippocrates (seated) and a fisherman greeting the god Asklepios (center) as he either arrives or disembarks from the island. Second or third century CE.

Introduction to Byzantine Art

Byzantine art originated and evolved from the now Christian Greek culture of the Eastern Roman Empire. Although the art produced in the Byzantine Empire was marked by periodic revivals of a classical aesthetic, it was above all marked by the development of a new aesthetic defined by its salient "abstract", or anti-naturalistic character. If classical art was marked by the attempt to create representations that mimicked reality as closely as possible, Byzantine art seems to have abandoned this attempt in favor of a more symbolic approach. The subject matter of monumental Byzantine art was primarily religious and imperial: the two themes are often combined.

Early Byzantine Art (330 - 842 AD)

The establishment of the Christian religion results in a new artistic movement, centered around the faith. However, ancient statuary remains appreciated. Most fundamental changes happen in monumental architecture, the illustration of manuscripts, ivory carving and silverwork. Exceptional mosaics become integral in artistic expression. The last 100 years of this period are defined by the Iconoclasm, which temporarily restricts entirely the previously thriving figural religious art.

Mosaics in the Rotunda of Thessaloniki, 4th - 6th century AD.

Macedonian Art & Komnenian Age (843 - 1204 AD)

These artistic periods correspond to the middle Byzantine period. After the end of the Iconoclasm, there is a revival in the arts. The art of this period is frequently called Macedonian art, because it occurred during the Macedonian imperial dynasty which generally brought a lot of prosperity in the empire. There was a revival of interest in the depiction of subjects from classical Greek mythology and in the use of Hellenistic styles to depict religious subjects. The Macedonian period also saw a revival of the late antique technique of ivory carving. The following Komnenian dynasty were great patrons of the arts, and with their support Byzantine artists continued to move in the direction of greater humanism and emotion. Ivory sculpture and other expensive mediums of art gradually gave way to frescoes and icons, which for the first time gained widespread popularity across the Empire. Apart from painted icons, there were other varieties - notably the mosaic and ceramic ones.

Paris Psalter, 10th century AD. Prophet Isaiah from the Old Testament in the company of the symbolisms for night (clear inspiration drawn from the ancient deity Nyx) and morning (Orthros, not to be confused with the mythological creature).

Palaeologan Renaissance (1261 - 1453)

The Palaeologan Renaissance is the final period in the development of Byzantine art. Coinciding with the reign of the Palaeologi, the last dynasty to rule the Byzantine Empire (1261–1453), it was an attempt to restore Byzantine self-confidence and cultural prestige after the empire had endured a long period of foreign occupation. The legacy of this era is observable both in Greek culture after the empire's fall and in the Italian Renaissance. Contemporary trends in church painting favored intricate narrative cycles, both in fresco and in sequences of icons. The word "icon" became increasingly associated with wooden panel painting, which became more frequent and diverse than fresco and mosaics. Small icons were also made in quantity, most often as private devotional objects.

Detail of Anástasis (Resurrection) fresco, c. 1316–1321, Chora church, Constantinople (Istanbul) (photo: byzantologist).

Cretan School (15th - 17th century)

Cretan School describes an important school of icon painting, under the umbrella of post-Byzantine art, which flourished while Crete was under Venetian rule during the Late Middle Ages, reaching its climax after the Fall of Constantinople, becoming the central force in Greek painting during the 15th, 16th and 17th centuries. By the late 15th century, Cretan artists had established a distinct icon-painting style, distinguished by "the precise outlines, the modelling of the flesh with dark brown underpaint, the bright colours in the garments, the geometrical treatment of the drapery and, finally, the balanced articulation of the composition". Contemporary documents refer to two styles in painting: the maniera greca (in line with the Byzantine idiom) and the maniera latina (in accordance with Western techniques), which artists knew and utilized according to the circumstances. Sometimes both styles could be found in the same icon. The most famous product of the school was the painter Domenikos Theotokopoulos, internationally known as El Greco, whose art evolved and diverged significantly in his later years when he moved in Spain and was involved in the Spanish Renaissance, and though it often alienated his western contemporary artists, nowadays it is viewed as an incidental early birth of Impressionism in the mid of the Renaissance’s peak.

Icon by Andreas Pavias (1440-1510), Cretan School, from Candia (Venetian Kingdom of Crete). The Latin inscription suggests the icon was meant for commercial purposes in Western Europe. National Museum, Athens. (Source: https://russianicons.wordpress.com/tag/cretan-school/)

Crucifixion (detail), El Greco (Doménikos Theotokópoulos), ca. 1604 - 1614.

Heptanesian School (17th - 19th century)

The Heptanesian school succeeded the Cretan School as the leading school of Greek post-Byzantine painting after Crete fell to the Ottomans in 1669. Like the Cretan school, it combined Byzantine traditions with an increasing Western European artistic influence and also saw the first significant depiction of secular subjects. The center of Greek art migrated urgently to the Heptanese (Ionian) islands but countless Greek artists were influenced by the school including the ones living throughout the Greek communities in the Ottoman Empire and elsewhere in the world. Greek art was no longer limited to the traditional maniera greca dominant in the Cretan School. Furthermore, the Heptanesian school was the basis for the emergence of new artistic movements such as the Greek Rocco and Greek Neoclassicism. The movement featured a mixture of brilliant artists.

Archangel Michael, Panagiotis Doxaras, 18th century.

Greek Romanticism (19th century)

Modern Greek art, after the establishment of the Greek Kingdom, began to be developed around the time of Romanticism. Greek artists absorbed many elements from their European colleagues, resulting in the culmination of the distinctive style of Greek Romantic art, inspired by revolutionary ideals as well as the country's geography and history.

Vryzakis Theodoros, The Exodus from Missolonghi, 1853. National Gallery, Athens.

The Munich School (19th century Academic Realism)

After centuries of Ottoman rule, few opportunities for an education in the arts existed in the newly independent Greece, so studying abroad was imperative for artists. The most important artistic movement of Greek art in the 19th century was academic realism, often called in Greece "the Munich School" because of the strong influence from the Royal Academy of Fine Arts of Munich where many Greek artists trained. In academic realism the imperative is the ethography, the representation of urban and/or rural life with a special attention in the depiction of architectural elements, the traditional cloth and the various objects. Munich School painters were specialized on portraiture, landscape painting and still life. The Munich school is characterized by a naturalistic style and dark chiaroscuro. Meanwhile, at the time we observe the emergence of Greek neoclassicism and naturalism in sculpture.

Nikolaos Gyzis, Learning by heart, 1883.

Rallis Theodoros, The Booty, before 1906.

20th Century Modern & Contemporary Greek Art

At the beginning of the 20th century the interest of painters turned toward the study of light and color. Gradually the impressionists and other modern schools increased their influence. The interest of Greek painters, artists changes from historical representations to Greek landscapes with an emphasis on light and colours so abundant in Greece. Representatives of this artistic change introduce historical, religious and mythological elements that allow the classification of Greek painting into modern art. The era of the 1930s was a landmark for the Greek painters. The second half of the 20th century has seen a range of acclaimed Greek artists too serving the movements of surrealism, metaphysical art, kinetic art, Arte Povera, abstract excessionism and kinetic sculpture.

Yiannis Moralis, Two friends, 1946.

Art by Giannis Gaitis (1923-1984), famous for his uniformed little men.

By Yorghos Stathopoulos (1944 - )

Art (detail) by Nikos Engonopoulos (1907 - 1985)

Folk, Modern Ecclesiastical and Secular Post-Byzantine Art

Ecclesiastical art, church architecture, holy painting and hymnology follow the order of Greek Byzantine tradition intact. Byzantine influence also remained pivotal in folk and secular art and it currently seems to enjoy a rise in national and international interest about it.

A modern depiction of the legendary hero Digenes Akritas depicted in the style of a Byzantine icon by Greek artist Dimitrios Skourtelis. Credit: Dimitrios Skourtelis / Reddit

Erotokritos and Aretousa by folk artist Theophilos (1870-1934)

Example of Modern Greek Orthodox murals, Church of St. Nicholas.

Ancient Greek philosophers depicted in iconographic fashion in one of Meteora’s monasteries. Each is holding a quote from his work that seems to foreshadow Christ. Shown from left to right are: Homer, Thucydides, Aristotle, Plato and Plutarch. This is not as weird as it may initially seem: it was a recurrent belief throughout the history of Christian Greek Orthodoxy that the great philosophers of the world heralded Jesus' birth in their writings - it was part of the eras of biggest reconciliation between Greek Byzantinism and Classicism.

Prophet Elijah icon with Chariot of Fire, Handmade Greek Orthodox icon, unknown iconographer. Source

If you see this, thanks very much for reading this post. Hope you enjoyed!

#greece #art #europe #history #culture #greek art #artists #greek culture #history of art #classical art #ancient greek art #byzantine greek art #christian art #orthodox art #modern art #modern greek art #anon #ask

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writingpracticetime · 2 years ago

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Did you have any thoughts, story-wise, on what Sandy herself thinks of all this and what her circumstances are? There are of course the inferences that can be made from that letter she got sent (and more specifically that it was turned over unopened) but is/was she in the public eye? Is she kept under close observation in case Constructor/Architect tries to approach her directly, and so on?

Oh I absolutely do have story thoughts about Sandy's opinions on everything. But the trouble with Sandy is--

————————————

Excerpts from recordings of meetings between the Architect and various associates.

————————————

CYBERSCOUT

--and, sorry, remind me why we care?

CONSTRUCTOR

We need to try to anticipate the general public objections to this. We won't be able to avoid them, not when we're going to be breaking so many laws. But we can at least anticipate them and get our own narrative out in advance.

HOBBES

I don't think you get the question. We're villains. Why are we tiptoeing around "public objections?"

CONSTRUCTOR

Because, this is ultimately for the public. We need to try and get out the word about how people are asking for our help, so people know we're responding to their needs. Besides, we can’t accomplish anything for the public without the public. Like Sandy said.

CYBERSCOUT

Who?

CONSTRUCTOR

My--nevermind. Anyway, as I said, let me try to figure things out with Lethe for a minute.

CYBERSCOUT

Alright, alright. I needed to head out anyway, just call me when you have an idea of what shit you want me to spread online.

(Shuffling, people leaving and closing the door behind them.)

CONSTRUCTOR

So you should have a better idea of what people are going to say to all of this. (Pause) Lethe?

LETHE

Sandy...? Cassandra White?

CONSTRUCTOR

You know her?! (Pause) Wait, then--what does she think about me now? Has she--

LETHE

Oh, u-uh no, sorry. I haven't--I never met her, never stood close enough to read her mind certainly. I-I wouldn't know what she thinks about you.

CONSTRUCTOR

...Oh.

LETHE

I just... heard a lot about her.

CONSTRUCTOR

...Funny. Not many people have.

LETHE

Yeaaaaah, um.

——————————

Blog post by Edward Katzenberger, journalist. Later removed and found on wayback.archive.org.

——————————

WHO IS CASSANDRA WHITE?

So, my long term followers all know about my hilariously derailed profile of Constructor assigned shortly before the stadium incident. I’ve kept you all abreast of the many, many delays related to high security super prisons and then my subject running off to start a supervillain career. Because of course, the second I get assigned this extremely exciting personality piece, Constructor becomes completely unreachable.

Alright, well, you might not believe me, but Constructor's manager/agent turned out to be even harder to reach.

At the time, I decided to take the "Frank Sinatra Has a Cold" approach and paint a portrait of Constructor based on the testimonies of coworkers, friends and family. I then found out that I could get testimonies from construction workers and urban planners about what the hero was like to work with (largely positive, if saddened by the recent turn of events) but nothing on what this incredibly beloved figure was like as a friend or family member.

The one thing I kept hearing from everyone was "Cassandra White would know more. The two of them seemed really close."

Now there was a problem: I couldn't find out who the fuck Cassandra White was.

———————————

BONFIRE

You got a--Oh, sorry. Working on something right now?

CONSTRUCTOR

Not work. I'm just-- (sounds of paper, flipping and folding it as Bonfire gets close) Just writing something.

BONFIRE

Writing...?

CONSTRUCTOR

Just scrawling out some thoughts, I guess.

LETHE

Mm. (Quiet) What are you both looking at me for?!

CONSTRUCTOR

What was that about?

LETHE

What was what about??

BONFIRE

Something about the writing...?

LETHE

Nothing! Nothing about the writing. I was just, I was making a noise. Thinking about something else, hahaha.

BONFIRE

.....What is it?

CONSTRUCTOR

Nothing! ... Lethe.

LETHE

I'm sorry! Don't be mad at me!

CONSTRUCTOR

I'm not mad! That was just--that was private.

BONFIRE

What was private?

LETHE AND CONSTRUCTOR

Nothing!

CONSTRUCTOR

(After a pause) ...I was just writing to Sandy again.

BONFIRE

(Irritated, sizzling noise) Ah, right. Sandy.

CONSTRUCTOR

See! This is why I didn't want to tell you.

BONFIRE

I don't see why you couldn't--

LETHE

Leaving! I'm leaving!

————————

It turns out Cassandra White was Constructor’s agent. I try to look her up online and? Nothing. No facebook profile, no personal website, not even a LinkedIn.

That has to be odd for someone who works in PR, right?

I do a little searching to find the agents of other superheroes. I contacted one, and got an interview. I've lost the thread of trying to piece together Constructor's life but I'm curious dammit. I mention the issue I've had with finding her anywhere. He nods his head while I explain the wild goose chase I've been on.

"Well, White is a whole other ballgame," he says. "She took her privacy seriously, and I'm also pretty sure she scrubbed a lot of her history. She was meticulous about records--knowing names in media, tech, and various public archives who could help you scrub a dumb tweet before it snowballed into a PR crisis for your client."

"You can get rid of internet records?"

"Well, not easily. And not after people realize they're important, that's for sure," he said. "I once told her things on the internet are forever. She said, 'No. If people pay attention, then they're forever. But if no one cares in the first place, then it never existed at all.'"

"So there was a process she used to make sure people's images stayed clean," I said, "And she used the same process to make herself a ghost?"

"I imagine so. I mean, she's retired from being an agent and has her fingers in all sorts of other pies these days. Businesses, investments, politics. Plus, I imagine becoming a billionaire or whatever has made her priorities shift."

Billionaire. I think I almost choked on my coffee. "You can become a billionaire from being a PR agent?"

"You can't," he said. "But White did."

—————————

DOC

--nd now that we got that patched up, this is the part where you tell my why the fuck the police caught you anyway.

CONSTRUCTOR

Uhh... Dunno. Not sure how they found me.

DOC

Where did they track you down?

CONSTRUCTOR

Um... I'm not feeling up for this conversation right now.

HOBBES

It was that new square in York XIV that looks like a Whole Foods staged a violent invasion.

DOC

....okay, is there a reason you decided to be wandering alone around in an area with shit ton of white moms ready to call the police on your ass?

CONSTRUCTOR

....Yeah, I was alone because I thought everyone here would tell me not to go. (Sigh) Look, I'm not gonna–

CYBERSCOUT

(poking head in) The Whole Foods place? Oy, isn't that where that old chick you're stalking has a house?

CONSTRUCTOR

I'm not--I was delivering a letter.

HOBBES

....wait a minute, I remember this. "Sandy" right? Your mom? The one who turned you into the FBI?

CONSTRUCTOR

She's not my mom. (Pause) And no, she turned in my letter--which she would have to, if she was being monitored. I thought if I--

CYBERSCOUT

Wasn't she also a racist? Wasn't that a whole fight you had with Bonfire?

HOBBES

(Judgmental) You act all woke and then you go and try to be friends a racist who lives in the Whole Foods district.

CONSTRUCTOR

She's not a--That's not what the fight--this is why I went alone!

———————

This conversation afforded me with a lot of more information which I am saving for a piece on the lives of superhero PR agents, which I am now utterly fascinated by. Regarding Cassandra White, the other significant info it afforded me was that Cassandra White does in fact have a twitter account that I missed in my earlier search.

I looked into it. It's the most inoffensive twitter account I've ever seen. It feels like it was generated on a factory belt. There is a headshot of an older white woman--Cassandra White herself, it seems--as the profile pic. She tweets very rarely herself, and instead seems to mostly retweet news updates and positive platitudes or quotes from historical figures. The tweets she does make are all of an extremely inoffensive liberal variety, with the spiciest being one gentle snipe at the Republican party.

There is one other hint of her personality on this twitter. It’s an unexpected photo from inside her home, one with a quick caption that says she regularly uses a whiteboard to write out her resolutions and thoughts, and that she finds the process to clarify her goals and values.

It reads:

IT WILL BE DONE QUIETLY. IT WILL BE DONE CIVILLY. IT WILL BE DONE RIGHT–OR IT WON’T BE DONE AT ALL.

—————————

CONSTRUCTOR

Alright, alright. We can talk more about this tomorrow but for now tell them no more death matches and any blood feuds need to be put on hold when they enter this fortress.

HOBBES

(Grunts) Pussy move.

CONSTRUCTOR

I don't care if it's a pussy move.

CYBERSCOUT

Ahem--what if I made the point that you're being culturally insensitive by imposing your mainstream standards of civility on a subculture of people, villains, who have their own values in how they deal with conflict, and--

CONSTRUCTOR

I know you bet on the fights and you're not changing my mind.

CYBERSCOUT

No fun. (sigh) Lethe, I TOLD you not to snitch on me!

LETHE

I didn't!

CONSTRUCTOR

Anyway, we can figure out a more long term solution for dealing with serious vendettas but for now--I'm tired. I have something else I need to work on. Tell them not to kill each other.

HOBBES

What are you writing that's more important than a potential deathmatch, anyway?

CONSTRUCTOR

Nothing. Just-- (Shuffling of papers) leave me to it for tonight. I don't want to set a precedent where I rush over every time someone wants to kill someone else, because given the personalities here that would mean never having any time.

CYBERSCOUT

Fiiiiiiiine.

(Grumbling and footsteps as people shuffle out, followed by writing noises.)

LETHE

Hey.

CONSTRUCTOR

What? (Pause) You know what I'm doing.

LETHE

The last time you tried to deliver something….

CONSTRUCTOR

I'll send someone else to deliver it.

(More scribbling. Deep breath.)

LETHE

I lied. I read her mind. She doesn't care about you.

(Writing stops. After a slight pause, there is the sound of paper crinkling and Lethe gasps and steps back.)

LETHE

Don’t be mad at me!

CONSTRUCTOR

(Deep, strained breath) I’m not mad. You're just wrong.

LETHE

I could literally read her mind!

CONSTRUCTOR

Okay, you're not wrong. You're lying.

LETHE

What? I'm not!

CONSTRUCTOR

(Fuming) You think I'm an idiot just because I haven't been calling you out on it? Everyone here knows you lie about what your powers show you whenever it suits your purposes.

LETHE

(Wobbly) I--I don't have a reason to lie about this!

CONSTRUCTOR

You don't have a reason that I know. But you are such a fucking liar. No one in the fortress trusts a thing you say, and you know it.

LETHE

Th-that's not--That's not relevant! Oh my god, you're literally never going to even consider this, a-are you? That she was just using you for the cut of your paycheck, making her fortune...

CONSTRUCTOR

I'm not going to re-evaluate a decade long perception of a loved one based on the words of a known liar, Lethe. Get out.

LETHE

But--

(Rumbling, cracking of the floor.)

CONSTRUCTOR

I said get out!

———————————

The twitter account confirms she exists and nothing else. I couldn't tell you what the woman thinks about anything. On a website people use to blast their opinions to the world at all hours, this one seems specifically built to deny the existence of any individual opinions or personality.

I scrolled all the way back to the time period during which Constructor would have had the big public meltdown at the stadium. I used the wayback machine to see if there were any deleted tweets, just in case she said anything in a fit of frustration or grief and deleted it.

But during the time where she would have been watching Constructor's breakdown, a time when everyone in the world had something to say about what Constructor had done--nothing.

Cassandra White, Constructor's closest person, had nothing to say about them at all.

#constructor

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