#it's a pattern with all of her friends | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

book-lover85 · 21 days

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ik people always talk about how Sophie never holds Keefe accountable or gets mad at him when he does something wrong (which I agree with)

but honestly she doesn't really hold any of her friends accountable

she got mad at Dex when he put the ability restrictor on her, Fitz after they broke up, and Keefe when he fought Dimitar

that's basically it

she lets most of her friends off the hook even when she shouldn't sometimes, it's a character flaw of hers it's not (always) something specific to her relationship with Keefe

#kotlc #keeper of the lost cities #sophie foster #and even when she got mad at them #she forgives quickly and easily #she was *surprised* in stellarlune when it showed that she still held resentment over fitz's behavior in Exile #because she forgives too quickly #it's a common thing she does #oh also biana in book 1 #but tbf biana was tentatively her friend at that point #im saying this mostly cause i dont think sophie and keefe having a somewhat unhealthy relationship #is the reason she forgives him too quickly #it's a pattern with all of her friends

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emsloe · 1 year

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Hi gaymers happy pride month!

If you're interested in supporting queer artists/designers this month, especially if you're looking for cool patterns to sew your own stuff, I humbly request you check out my sister's work.

Everyone in my family has been using bags she's made. My parents have matching shoulder bags from her that they use every day, and she made my dice bag + all of my art supply bags as well. So I can vouch for her stuff being great quality!

She's also got cute animal hand warmers:

I think she'll mostly be selling patterns but will have a few bags and such for sale also.

If you want to follow her making-stuff-for-etsy progress, her instagram is make.it.gemtea, and her etsy is bucketproject (unpopulated until the 17th)

#sewing patterns #I genuinely have no idea what to tag this as but I figured the links probably means it won't make it into tags anyway #so rbs would be much appreciated #I *know* people on this website are into stuff like this and I think everyone should see. beaming it directly onto your dash. pls #maybe buy a pattern to sew yourself an animal hand warmer/friend?#I will be slightly annoying about rbing this if no one sees it. jsyk #surge talks #also sorry if there are typos or if the post is ugly. im sick as a dog rn. home of phobia #but yea i'm commissioning her to make me a bag to put all my t shot stuff in too #she might have also made her girlfriend's insulin bag?

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faaun · 10 months

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Jack Marsh (2005), Friendship Otherwise - Toward a Levinasian Description of Personal Friendship

#saw carnation lily lily rose by john singer seargent irl today. it was basically at my doorstep all along idk why i never went to see it #it was placed at a corner in the gallery. me and my friend sat down and sketched the paintings of beautiful naked people quite badly. paper #provided by tate britain. she told me about how she couldnt look her boyfriend in the face after a harrowing film about war. when i say the #interview was informal i mean the person who was supposed to be my boss told me let me get you a cider and then he said after #50 years of life he knows people are inherently good and it only takes a little bit of kindness to save this world. he said he tricked #his wife into keeping the baby and then he said he quit his job at a US bank to help people find meaning and in it #he would have liked to find meaning. instead he started climbing with his friends. he said he chews his cigarettes because its a habit from #when he had to hide things from people. the entire time i felt uncomfortable and incredibly enlightened. this is my friends mentor. she has #his pattern of pauses and expletive and penchant for ends-justify-means attitude. i do think im not very clever #but maybe one day i will love you enough to make up for it. i wrote code i dont understand staring at the final error i thought about how #we both thought of how when we're too old to remember the voices of our friends we would like to stand in the pathway of the LHC beam pipe #cut it open and eat light in the freezing cold vacuum (kills you long before radiation will) the invisible puncture wound unfolding dna #back to the start larger than you ever were. you go to heaven once youve been to hell. my friend is in my bed #practicing calculations of eigenvectors by hand and she is uninterested in a visual proof you are uninterested in incompetence #we catch a train this is your kind of burden you tragic hero wincing at that word you only do this because you have to. im the only one #who can. i am a coward in this for the fucking poetry. the visual proofs. the pretty numbers. an architect who was horrible at maths wanted #to be a philosopher and accidentally ended up neck in deep in 70th Error On Visual Studio Code i want to kiss your eyes before we say #goodbye we both know there is no love in the way there should be. I still have your dress in my wardrobe. i hope you make art.#you think im alright head-wise i think you fucking hate me i think ill never be so clever you want me to tell you my idea?#if you wanted more of this world i would have liked to kiss you harder. we cant both be like this. im sorry i cant be with you the whole wa #the love is gone if you have to ask it. his breath catches his eyes feel stiff it is -1.9 kelvin he is near the beam pipe i miss holding #his hand i miss her singing voice i miss his hair and i found the antonym of pain thank you for carrying me home.

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musubiki · 7 months

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i need to draw more......mochi pining for oblivious lime........

#need to think more about that time period where shes so in love with him and hes (shes just a friend)#(a cute friend but still just a friend)#i think the reason lime eventually likes her is because she hides that she loves him so well #so hard to get lime to like someone #hes the type where if you show interest right off the bat he gets irked #because he knows (or thinks) you only like him for his handsome face #to get lime to like you you have to 1) spend a LOT of time getting to know him as a friend. like years #2) he has to want to / like being friends with you enough to hang out that long #3) he has to actually be attracted to you #so fucking hard to meet the criteria #hard enough to meet the first two and then the 3rd one is just up to chance honestly #anyway. for a while hes in straight denial that mochi is anything more than a friend #even to get him to admit shes cute is like pulling teeth #imagine being mochi....so close yet so far #just loving him quietly #all you can be is supportive #afraid to show even a little bit of affection because you dont want him to get freaked out or uncomfortable #i think she knows hes like that too so she works extra hard to hide it #pattern observation + hes ranted to her about it once before

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welcometogrouchland · 1 year

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Also what if I said the show taking time to show that Luz and Hunter aren't unhealthily dependent on one another post time skip the way they were in thanks to them (but still close seen in Luz's patches on her clothes or Hunter taking time off work to go to Luz's bday) actually plays in to the cycle of sibling betrayal motif w/ the Clawthornes and Wittebanes????

#ramblings of a lunatic #the owl house #toh #luz noceda #hunter toh #bc like. both of the previous generations of siblings had incredibly small/non-existant support networks outside of each other #the wittebanes were orphans and bc Caleb was philips caretaker as well as his brother #(and also just kinda. a pattern with philip)#he loves caleb on the condition that he agrees with and stays with philip. and when Caleb stops meeting these conditions love is revoked #in the form of. yknow. murder and cloning and then murdering the clones #bc again it's less about the ambiguous abandonment and more about the 'living a life i don't agree with and therefore can't be part of-#-due to my own selfishness and bigotry' thing philips got going on #a mindset that would be understandable for a powerless child but is ridiculous coming from a 400 year old god king #Lilith is ALSO in a state of preoccupation and arrested development when we meet her!#the thing that drove a wedge between the Clawthorne sisters was the fact that they were no longer each others codependent supports #Eda had Raine and is clearly closer/at least gets more undivided attention from their parents #not that eda's life is all rainbows and sunshine- she's still an outcast. but she has people other than Lilith #everything we see from the gallery nucleus art to edas old photos portrays the hagsquad as eda's friendgroup. not Lilith's #and years later in s1 even when Lilith is at the top of the boiling isles social latter she's still hung up on Eda #both bc of her guilt but bc she seemingly has no friends who are also her equals #she wants her codependent support system back no matter the damage it'll cause to Eda #bc much like philip she's sort of in a state of arrested development #it's a theme with toh antagonists #the difference being Lilith tried to grow up too fast and was never able to move beyond her teenage conceptualisation of maturity #so she's good at pretending to be mature when really she's not #all this to say that Luz and Hunter don't have this problem outside of thanks to them when they're at their self-hate peak #luz has her mom her owl fam Amity Willow Gus. Hunter now has Camila Gus and Willow and eventually Darius #they don't NEED to be the only one the other can count on and bc of that they're not gonna lose their shit when the other does something-#-they feel they can't/don't want to be a part of #anyway I'm out of tags but. this was a good move writing wise actually even if i love their dynamic. we got a whole special abt them

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schizowitchic · 1 month

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also like i partially found out i might be intersex because i was looking at trans stuff and there was like "(however many) months on t and finally seeing some bottom growth" and like pictures of t-dicks and i was like.... um.... that's kind of just what my clit looks like anyways. so i was like "hey google give me a quick rundown on this" and learned what clitoromegaly was and then i was like. hm. intersex resources. and it's like a sign? symptom? side-effect? of certain intersex conditions

#i mean like pcos runs in the mums side of my family but i dont have all the symptoms of that #i do also have like. more hair?? than the average afab person #like dark hair on my stomach and chest and back #and my face. whats disappointing about the face hair is that it isnt enough to be able to grow a beard #so i cant even fuck with gender that way #tagging as nsft just because of like genital mention #genital mention #nsft #shoutout to transmascs on t who show their t-dicks on the internet it was really helpful #also i dont know how to describe it but like. my natural face shape is kind of masculine??#like it would be plausible for a cis amab perisex man to have my face without looking feminine #if you get what im saying??#if it sounds like im reinforcing sex or gender essentialism please say i am struggling to find words #unshoutout to the boys in primary school who made fun of me for having hair under my arms and starting a whole decade of insecurity-#-about having hair on my body lmao #for the record i dont think certain face shapes are indicative of gender and all im just going by like. patterns?? in afab vs. amab faces #also not that i think afab vs. amab is the entire categorisation of human sex characteristics but um. working with what vocab i have here #i think what also really kicked it off. was relating to a fair few experiences intersex people have socially #particularly intersex ppl who were afab and faced a lot of pressure to make their bodies conform to feminine beauty standards #and it was like.... oh lol.... my mum did that to me!!#it comes from her own internalised shit bc she has pcos (idk if she identifies as intersex even tho she could if she wanted) but still.#dont project that onto a 10 yr old lmao. she keeps buying me hair removal products #ALSO floored by an experience i have. in which apparently half my friends dont feel pressure to shave their legs #because the hair on their legs is like. light and thin and barely visible and i was like?? huh??#what do you MEAN your legs don't look like your brothers/fathers if you dont shave??#im starting to think they dont shave their arms. their arms might just naturally not have a load of hair #i dont shave my arms though. cannot be bothered with that and also like. why would i do that #also you know that like. happy trail i think its called?? on “men's” stomachs??#yeah i have that naturally yeah thats right im naturally sexy #if you cant tell i am putting “girls” “mens” “boys” “womens” etc. in quotes to indicate that is just the normal society way of saying it

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asurrogateblog · 5 months

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so at what point do you think linda was like "...OH."

#like. how much did paul share with her?#i mean even if he wasn't very forthcoming she of all people must have noticed The Patterns #I remember a quote of her saying 'if I'd known then what I know now....' and I wonder what she meant #love that their relationship was so secure that 'he's also still in love with his ex best friend' probably didn't do that much damage #mclennon

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altruistic-meme · 6 days

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i didn't get the specific one i was after, but i DID get a k-cup coffee maker!!! fuck yeah!!! and it came with a coffee filter too, so i can still make regular coffee in it :D

#and i didn't have to buy one of those separately!!#ALSO got a k-cup stand thing. which is cute af to me.#and for only $5 each!!!#so >:DDDDDD #all in all worth getting out of bed so early and driving 30min to get here #i do feel a LITTLE bad bc when my friend texted me and i sent a photo of where i was #she got upset bc she was about to ask me if i wanted to go together #but like.#i let get know i read going to go yesterday via telling her i wanted to see if they still had the one i was after #and she didnt say anything then so #she says she was distracted but #nothing to do about that ig #i waited to see if she would say anything yesterday and when she didnt i didnt stress it #bc i know myself well enough to know that if i had let myself stress it i wouldve not left when i did #and i probably would've missed out on what i did get today #by being like an hour or two later #so im not gonna let myself feel guilty #there wasn't really much here anyway tbh #i did get a pattern 2 movies and 2 vhs too but #like #that's simply bc they're things I've already seen and i want to expand my physical collection of movies #alas still couldn't find operation petticoat though 😔#ill have to check online for that ig #shh ac

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doubledyke · 9 months

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Loved seeing your thought on music the eds would listen to! Any ideas for what music tastes they might have in common?

awwww lasagna that means so much coming from the playlist goat 🐐that's a good question. i've definitely thought about it once or twice.

i love @fish-bowl-2's headcanon about edd being extremely out of the loop when it comes to music/pop culture, so i do imagine he gets a lot of his taste from eddy's recommendations. (and eddy's taste was formed by albums he found around the house, especially in his brother's room. but that's besides the point.) anyway for some gay reason, massive attack is what i picture edd and eddy enjoying together. blue lines is more eddy's taste while mezzanine is right up edd's alley - the house m.d. theme song is on there after all.

eddy song

edd song

oh and machine girl

eddy song

edd song

despite his living under a rock music wise, i do think edd would songs from many genres and nods along to most stuff eddy plays. some day i'll get around to making an eddeddy playlist and this'll be the first song

i don't even know if i'm joking at this point i'm so unwell

ed and eddy... i loved the scene you wrote in LMS when they listen to fuckin gettin jiggy wit it lmao. that pretty much sums up what i picture them listening to together: cheeky, high energy 90s music.

when eddy's having his nu metal moment i can see them going feral to limp bizkit together.

and cypress hill

ed and edd are listening to video game OSTs together

youtube

edd can zone out to the beautiful ambient music and ed likes being reminded of games he likes lol

when they have sleepovers as kids i picture all 3 eds listening to the crazy frog album (even though it came out in 2005, i don't care it is edscore)

#the crazy frog thing comes from my memory of listening to that album exclusively with this one friend i had as a kid when we had sleepovers #i think it was her older sister's CD and for some reason it felt so edgy #probably because his literal wiener is just swangin on the cover #but yeah thanks for giving me another excuse to share some tunes on here #i'm sure you're all starting to see a pattern in the stuff i like lol #i tend not to focus on lyrics much which is probably why i haven't made a sappy eddeddy playlist yet #to be clear i'm not that big of a limp bizkit fan just a couple songs cuz they're so eddycore #it's my cross to bear im afraid 😔#text

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firkant-fugl · 9 days

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Got to hang out w my crush/date for like an hour and ahhhhhh I'm so smitten

#She's so cute. So cute. I'm. She's so cUTE #Norwegians will know the phrase “våryr” and i am that but without the vår. It's autumn #Høstyr. I made this word just now bevause it is The Description. It's The Mood #Or maybe it's the full moon Idk #All I know is that I'm strugglin to decide on my Halloween costume because I want to look the sexiest I possibly can #Specifically for her. And for my friends. But platonically sexy for my friends and Not Platonically for Her #If u read all of this pls say which you think sounds hotter out of these two options #1. Cat ears cat makeup and full body cat patterned leotard #2. Red and short A-line off shoulder dress with poofy white petticoat and A Lot of cleavage

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faaun · 4 months

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i feel rly sad and conflicted abt one of my best friends on earth but idk who to ask for advice bc i usually would have consulted her in this situation lmao

#shes cool and i dont want to lose her and i know Logically i love her but atm i feel so strange towards her #and idk what to do abt it bc i know in the past ive like...over-communicated a lot and over the last few yrs ive been trying to not do that #bc thats an anxious impulse i think .so like . self control #AND IMPORTANTLY . i may actually be the problem here ?? ok again i love her i dont want to lose her etc but basically ive noticed a pattern #which is that whenever she gets a bf/a man (even fwb) in her life she basically stops talking to me and the limited interactions we do have #become abt him. and while i support her it is acc too much. like we barely talked while she was w her ex bf until he became abusive and #then we talked a lottt like all our convos understandably were abt him . and then when they broke up we kept hanging out so i didnt rly see #the pattern there but still she seemed to centre men a lot in her life like sbe was excited to not date and find herself and then #immediately afterwards started seeing this other guy with whom shes basically in a relationship now #hes nice and all but like . HES ALL SHE TALKS ABT . actually we barely talk atp but when we do its abt him #she sends me reels sometimes but its all abt being jealous abt him etc . and shes bi but she said she doesnt like the idea of dating women #bc theyre scary . and i thought she was kidding in the ohhh women r so beautiful that theyre intimidating way but no she was being entirely #fr . she explained jts bc she was bullied by a girl in the past but like...bro ur ex bf literally abused you like surely you see men are #capable of just as much harm? but obvs who she dates is her own choice . but anyway she has consistently made plans w me then cancelled the #like an hr before . or asked to call me and then proceeded to not do so . when i ask her to meet/call its the same she just doesnt respond #or she cancels ? and while i understand anxiety sucks it feels SO WEIRD STILL . maybe im the problem slightly too bc ik i have no right to #feel this way but it rubs me the wrong way that ik she has so much time to spend w him/calls him all the time despite meeting him just a fe #months ago whereas i just have to like ...be ok w not actually having talked to her for a long time #its gotten to the point where when she says do you wanna meet/call i automatically respond yes and then just assume it doesnt happen . like #there have been several times over the past few months i double booked plans over when we were supposed to call/meet bc i was sure she #wouldnt show up and ive been right each time #like she sends me texts that she misses me or im her best friend etc etc occasionally and then acts rly . contrary to that ?#ive talked to her abt the issue w cancelling on me twice btw. when i was still dating the situationship person she would get sooo mad at #them for not respecting my time and shed tell me i deserve better etc etc and then like . she doesnt seem to respect my time at all #anyway she said she understand and she admits to like...being flaky etc but does nothing abt it #and its not like i can tell her to stop caring so much abt men bc we sorta had convos like that b4 she got This involved w this guy #and apparently it did nothing and the last thing i want is to police her relationships or get in her way #its just AUSHD AUGH #anyway i rly miss her it just doesnt feel the same at all anymore

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asinglesock · 2 months

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send help. it's supposed to be 91 degrees tomorrow. on my day off :(

#a sock speaks #work tag #food tag #it was high 80s today but I didn't even notice bc the air conditioner at restaurant job is punishingly high powered #I was wearing my long sleeved undershirt and leggings without any discomfort #but I have to run errands tomorrow and my car has no AC. the house also has no AC but is okayish at staying cool.#I wanted to make pizza today but didn't have time. might be too hot for pizza tomorrow :( but my ingredients are aging in the fridge #I finally got a paycheck but it's for the 2nd period I worked. I'm missing the first one and need to talk with the regional manager #and he's only in on Thursdays #also gotta request a day off to go to Portland with my cousin in 2 weeks #also gotta request off for orchestra which also starts in 2 weeks #also my aunt is trying to recruit me for a caregiving job and I'd have to take 3 weeks off to get trained #it'd be super easy to schedule both jobs once I'm trained but the training is a big time commitment #also restaurant job scheduled me for all graveyard shifts this week. if I can't adjust my sleep schedule I'll have to give a firm no on it #also gotta go to the bank to deposit my check and. uh. all of August's tips (terrifying)#also gotta call a vital records office in Maine about my mom's birth certificate bc we're trying to take her to Canada for her birthday #I don't think we have enough time but my sister wants to do it #also I want to finish knitting this sock that I started in June. I just have the toe left #also I finally confirmed the color and pattern for a baby blanket I'm preparing as a gift so I gotta get yarn #also I need to buy blackout curtains to fit my windows so I can sleep in the day if I work nights #also sometime this week my sister is cleaning the church. I want to go with her so I have an excuse to get ice cream from a shop nearby #also I need to clean my room and I should hang up the art prints & postcards I've been collecting for months #most of them are green to match my decor but some are just characters or scenes I like #oh! I also owe a postcard to a school friend #I had caffeine for the first time in several days and my brain is buzzing. there's so much I want to do and I have time to do it #and I'm excited about it!

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qulizalfos · 3 months

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adrianne lenker. guys

#ik i post abt a lot of artists here but AAAJKHEFJHFDJHKTREWHKFDSHJKHFKJSDGHKFJ #banger after banger after #.#emptiness!!!!! tell me bout your naturee MAYBE IVE BEEN GETTING U WRONG!#also the way my angel cuts out makes me so severely unwell #i wanna cover one of her songs so bad................... but im still not there with guitar and i havent played piano in like 3 years rip #BUT! im gonna cover good news by jb because it seems pretty simple (guitar tabs tells me there are only 4 chords IM WINNING)#and it's well within my vocal range i think this is a sign #plus the strumming pattern....................................................say no more #back to adrianne lenker tho #only really listening to songs (2020) yet so i cant waaitt to listen to her other music :)) ive listened to ruined which i like!!!#but omfgggggggggg i really like not a lot just forever guys. and come. top two favs thus far i think #and my friend loves anything and shes learning it on guitar (theyre the one who got me into her in the first place love her fr)#they were all like “its sad lesbian music .youre gonna love it" and then i did.#anyway i am by proxy obsessed with anything and tbf it's LITERALLY such a great song #STARING DOWN THE BARREL OF A HOT SUN!#!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i love her music holy shit #hjkgfdshjkgsdfhjkgsfjkhsfgdjhkgsdf #gfdhgfdsjkhgfdshjkgsdfj #gkhjsjknfdvjknfvjknx

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imabiscuitinthousandworlds · 6 months

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I have begun with my art project! We're supposed to document a journey, real or fictional (applies to both journey and place). So, naturally, I'm sending someone into the Distortion.

The first cardboard box is done! There will be another, larger one underneath that's not immediately visible unless you open the door and I'll find a way to fit in little notes of some poor person's attempt at a diary to keep their senses in these corridors. (It won't work but that's the fun in it).

Anyway I'm really excited for this project and I'm super proud of the door so far!

#one note will be halfway hanging through the letter gap 'there is a yellow door in my room. i dont have a yellow door'#the rest? we'll see!#if i can i'll get some of these little pocket mirrors and my teacher is tryna find little led lights i think #it would be sooo trippy (which is to say perfect)#still tryna figure out how to do the notes and other interior though #i thought maybe each wall of the big box is a different colour #or mayyyyybe (and this is a big maybe) i can get my hands onto small pieces of tapestry #that's like. the same pattern but different colours #also my teacher suggested the bigger box underneath but she actually suggested two of those #i'm not sure yet but that could also be fun. or too much. i'll see #funny thing is my tma friend is doing a trip to denmark but that also gets increasingly weird and ends up a file in the magnus institute #and another friend is including the local supernatural fauna of her land of choice very literally #and another friend is also incorporating all creepy myths about those mountains #it's reallllly funny and i'm so excited lmao #it's the coolest project ever istg #a biscuit's rambles

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no-mercy-bby · 1 year

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I kind of just want to drop out of college and crochet and write books and

#get married (i don't have a boyfriend)#and have kids (i am not in a relationship or stable enough for a family)#i kinda wanna sell crochet stuff but it takes me like a month to make any and everything #plus i suck at reading and understanding patterns #and all ik is single crochet and double crochet and even then i think i do them wrong as well #Tunisian stitch is fun but i don't have a hook long enough and it hurts my hand #idk if it was just my sinuses and lack of sleep but ive felt so bad all day #and my back hurts cause i sit like a shrimp and don't know how to stand i guess #im so tired. genuinely.#and my mouth is fucked up again with sores because of stress and biting at my own lips #and its so lonely being in college #which is kinda funny cause i have more people i would actually consider as friends than ever #but i kinda just feel like im *there*#and i have a million projects to do but i played fortnite with my sis and her husband and my brother instead #and my dad taught my sis and i to play solitaire #and then i beat them both at black jack (it was actually a tie of how many matches i won but shhh)#and i know im blessed that im basically getting paid to go to college by my college but #it just doesn't feel right. like it feels isolating and lonely #and i have gone to some events btw they are not that great

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juniestar · 4 months

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Oh my god one last thing my ex took me to outside lands and when we tried to watch lana del rey he laid down on the grass and had a “panic attack” (this was after months of him talking about how he didn’t like her) so we went to see foo fighters after a bit and he was FINE

#LANA i know his sister works for you BUT TRUST MY WORD AND GIVE ME A FREE TICKET PLEASE…#MY FIRST TIME SEEING YOU WAS RUINED GIRL… she was so good too like i was saving her songs to spotify that night #im reliving all this because i found out a lot of his exes and ex friends hang out together and two of them invited me so it was me an ex an #d an ex friend just swapping stories and first of all. he said he got cheated on by this girl and she NEVER DID IT (HE would have emotional/#angry outbursts at HER though) (allegedly he’s acknowledged to her that the cheating never happened too) and 2. this is obviously making me #mentally rehash everything again. i feel so bad for his current girlfriend and also for the person i ‘’stole’’ him from though i really hesi #tate to blame myself after hearing about his patterns. first of all he wouldve done this with anyone who was vulnerable around him and secon #d i was the only reason he was at all honest with them. he was fully planning to gaslight this ex and me and his dad had to convince him not #to. they look like theyre happy now and im very happy for them over that. oh my god that man was evil he told me for WEEKS about every time #his then partner had talked shit about me while i made clear that i didnt care and wasnt very interested but he kept going. god i cant belie #ve this was my life a year ago.#the one thing i can say is that i out freaked him because throughout our short relationship i made him so insecure that a week after i told #to never speak to me again he called me asking if he really was ugly.#I CANNOT BELIEVE I HAD TO TEND TO A GROWN MAN WHILE LANA DEL REY WAS RIGHT THERE BECAUSE HE WAS SO OPPOSED TO BEING AROUND HER. LANAAAA #times like these i get so mad i dont know what to do but ultimately remembering that he has not achieved any of his goals because he refuses #to face himself really helps me. god man IVE achieved some of his goals and i wasnt even trying to #a really awful part of all of this was all of the friends who knew him taking his side. because they didnt know him well enough to know what #he was actually like.#i was talking to my ex friend of four years and she was like not to blame you but he was probably really vulnerable from his time with [ex p #rior to me]’’ because he’s been going around alleging that that ex was abusive. and she was implying i took advantage of him. so i had to go #into detail about what an awful awful person he was and the sort of state i was in when this relationship took place. hannah lee you are #not seeing your little jehovah’s witness heaven.#anyways redirecting this energy im very happy with the way my life is and the way i am now. and im grateful for it i would not have ever bee #n able to imagine having the sort of peace and motivation i feel now. life feels like it can and will change for the better and it keeps pro #ving that right all the time #it just hurts sometimes having that as my first experience and not even being able to vocalize what was wrong bc i just didnt know hurts #oh i forgot one of his besties can see my account bc we’re sort of mutuals. i doubt he’s looking he did the whole unfollowing the ex bc she’#s allegedly amoral thing after the breakup but if he is hi isaac #he did on rare occasion show me selfless kindness but ultimately your best friend is a creep. i don’t want to be involved with anyone from #our school but I hope you know this and I hope you’re proud

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