#it’s the trauma :)

[timblrdrake]

Why are you the way you are

silly, whimsical

End of the best haiku ever

- @candy-penrose

candy, my friend, this is beautiful but i have to give this the extremely loud incorrect buzzer

‼️🚨TOO MANY SYLLABLES🚨‼️

[corey-writes-stuff]

I need somebody to give me explicit permission to not write the meeting James’s parents chapter of I Can Save Them. Right?

Please

I do not want to write this chapter because I have no ideas and I can’t move on until I have permission to not write it

[stardewgay]

yes i’m self aware. if a man spoke to me the way shane speaks to the farmer at the beginning of the game, i’d cry and avoid him with a passion

[alittlepassionfruit]

Nobody talks about how funny Jude is. The 4-5 jokes he made in the entire novel had me CA-CK-LING

[babygorewhore]

If you’re wondering if I make myself laugh at my posts, yeah I do. I crack myself up tbh.

[cykelops]

me: it actually hurts my feelings when I’m only recognized for my dirty jokes because it goes to show how often I just. say things. That I don’t even know why I say them

me when there’s a beat of silence in the overwatch group chat: I would suck doomfist’s nipples until they cracked off

[feelin-peachy-keen]

I want someone to fuck me hard enough, that I don’t have to think anymore

[supposethismatters]

That time when an employee tried to gaslight me into excepting the fault in a situation they were responsible to resolve by acting like I was behaving rudely and unreasonably to make herself the true victim…

Which then backfired HORRIBLY when I had a panic attack from the sudden hostility in an already stressful situation.

Her desperately trying to hide that she made a customer cry from her supervisor and client like an older sibling shushing the youngest they just tried a wrestling move on lol.

[empress-poochiekins]

no, i’m a botl calypso stan. you are a hoo/toa calypso stan. we are not the same.

[tracey-cauchemar]

Me: I wish I had people to talk about my interests with

Me when I see people talking about my interests: Woah that’s terrifying gotta leave the situation immediately!

[catboyclarity]

I feel like I don’t have touch aversion bc I have one big exception and a couple little ones (alek is allowed to touch me and family members can hug me) but then I think about like. Literally anybody else touching me and I feel like I need to cut all my skin off. No 💖

[televisongifs]

QUEEN MAEVE

1x04 the female of the species

[rainbowpopeworld]

Scene from my life:

(After some fun banter that I don’t remember)

Spouse: thank you for entertaining me so 😍😂

Me: Like I said, I’m at least as funny as Sarah Silverman

S: I’m sorry I don’t entertain you as much

M (laughing): you just need a little more trauma

S: trauma‽

M: yeah we’ll go back in time and give you a little more trauma

S: worst use of a time machine

M: it really is!! If I were going to go back in time to make you funnier, I could just give you jokes! “Here kid, this’ll kill in 2025”

S: that would be great

M: it’s like Agnes Nutter, but useless. Will I tell you what stocks to invest in? No! But here’s a tight 5

S: but I could get a career out of a tight 5

M: I’m not sure 5 minutes will get you a career

S: that’s what I hear…

and scene

[localcemeteryresident]

Turned my body into a crime scene

Laid me to rest in a place of the restless

An emptied out grave that was never mine to begin with

Head stone reading

“Here they lay destroyed helpless and disposed of in a body they no longer get to call home.”

As you walk away they’ll ask you about me but will you ever tell them you were the last to see me alive?

The reason I’m hollowed out?

The reason my freezing corpse still finches at unexpected touch?

Here I lay buried in my grave trying to claw my way to the top.

Some people die before they’re actually dead and so I’ll haunt all the places I know and I’ll weep in corners, stare longingly from windows into empty gardens.

Because my body is a crime scene that my aching soul will wonder in all its crevices praying one day it’ll cross over.

[theloveinc]

Me with abt 49 different wips abt faves dating different versions of u while you literally watch