#it’s just too much for me ☹️☹️☹️☹️
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pyotrkochetkov · 3 days ago
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yougavememyopia · 3 days ago
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YOU WRITE CRYING MEN SO WELL ITS CRAZY ☹️🙏🙏 CAN WE PLS PLS PLS GET SMUT FOR CRYBABY!YANDERE OMG
Of course :) Pt.1. Pt.2.
Tags: oral (reader receiving), pillow humping, mommy kink (a bit obvious lol), poor communication
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Yandere crybaby, who, despite all of his perverted fantasies, would be shy to take things further with you. You'd have to coax it out of him with gentle reassurance. Petting the top of his head, kissing his pouty lips, nibbling on his neck. Slowly drawing lewd whimpers and whines from him. Slowly making him rock hard for you.
But then, at the last frustrating second, where you start to take off his shirt, he'd stop you. Embarrassment with a mix of insecurity in his eyes. Choked up tears and weak excuses muttered from his lips. Making your heart flutter at the sight of beet-redded face. Your fingers wiped his cheek, his lips planting kisses against your palm in return. Taking a few seconds to calm down his breathing, he bore his eyes into yours.
"We don't have to do anything you aren’t comfortable with, honey."
Your kind words eased him. But he knew you were bound to get tired of him being a pathetic crying mess. Truth was, he was scared— afraid that you'll hate him if you saw what was underneath his clothes. Afraid that if he didn't satisfy you, you would surely get rid of him. Leave him all alone to rot. Be with someone who was far better than him.
He couldn't let that happen.
"No, hic... You need relief. I-I can do this! I don't want you to be unsatisfied... Hic! I don't want you to go to anyone else for this. I want you to only look at me. Love me. Only me."
He got down between your legs. Rubbing your knees as he gulped, swallowing the saliva that wanted to spill. He felt sweaty. His heart drummed against his ears as tears fell from his eyes.
"Are you sure?" You confirmed it with him one last time, unable to say no to his cute, innocent face. He sniffled as he nodded enthusiastically. He wanted to do this. Not only because he could finally taste you, but also to make himself useful. He wanted to be good for you. He craved your approval; he needed it to survive.
He felt nervous. He had no idea what to do when you hesitantly pulled down your underwear. Just staring at your private...
His pants already creamed just by the sight of your bare pussy. He bit his lip hard, hiding a whimper from the shock of pleasure traveling up his body. Blinking and blinking, the gears in his head turning.
Your brows furrowed in concern. "I don't think we should, um..."
You lost your train of thought when his shaky breaths fanned your mound. An unsure tongue licking the length of your sensitive front. His eyes closed in ecstasy. Already overwhelmed enough by all his other senses. Your familiar smell, your divine taste, your dripping flesh— all driving him crazier. The noise you made caused his stomach to churn.
He pulled away, rubbing his cheek to the soft plush of your thigh instead. "Mmgh, f-feels too good. I..." His hand covered a mewl. "I love you so much..."
"I love you too, baby. But it's not a big deal if you—"
You were cut off again, this time by a surge of good shock shooting through you. He delved in, started to eat you out like a starved man. Licking, sucking, nibbling. His hands grabbing your hips so he could push his tongue further into your hole. Sinful squelching noises filled the room. His nose pressing against your clit with each thrust of his tongue. He wasn't holding back any longer, hiding his face between your thighs.
He slowly began to move his hips. His poor overstimulated cock rubbing against the couch. Aroused again with a fever. His whole body burned. His eyes rolled to the back of his head while he kept going. Movements only getting rougher and faster while you placed your hand on top of his head. Holding his head and bucking into his mouth, chasing release.
You had no idea he could be like this. His docile attitude replaced with something feral. He was moaning like he was in pain. Feeding on your juices to quench his thirst. His hips bumped against the furniture as if he wasn't capable of controlling it. Tears ruining his pretty face even more.
It was only a matter of time before you finished. Your back arching and your toes curling with a loud groan. "Ahhh... Fuck, fuck! Where did all that come from?"
"I-I just want you to be happy... Did I make you happy? Was I good? Are you gonna stay with me? You won't abandon me... right?!"
You sighed, a small smile forming on your face. He clearly had some things to work out. Always needing constant comfort; begging for you to own him, capture him, claim him as yours. He wished he could say the words without tearing up. Ask you to tie him down to your bed and just play with his hair.
He got comfortable with your body. Learning to use his slender fingers and even started to make eye contact when he kitten-licked your sensitive nub. Sobbing happy tears when you slowly stroked his hair. He felt enveloped by your love. Surrounded by you.
The liquid streamed down to his chin. Cries of joy vibrating against your heat while he worked harder to drive you to the edge. Half-lidded eyes staring up at yours as his fingers slid in and out of you rhythmically.
"Such a good boy, aren't you, hon? Yes. Yes, you are. You're my good boy. Ah, fuck, I'm gonna—"
Sometimes, the best way to help him calm down was to let him cuddle up to your chest. Sitting on your lap, head under your shirt— engulfed by your sweet sweet smell— lips moving around your breasts. Licking hot stripes around your areola, sucking on your nipple like a pacifier.
He'd start to get more greedy for your approval. Asking if he did a good job for a basic task, like folding his clothes and putting them away. Or if he was a good boy for not crying when you went to the bathroom. He was adorable— looking at you like a lost child, wanting for you to take care of him.
He couldn't bear to be apart from you for even a moment. Pleading and pleading for you to stay when you wanted to hang out with your friends. You pecked his lips, "Be good, baby. I'll be back in 2 hours. Promise."
He whimpered when you pulled away from him. Yet obeying your words as he should. Plopping down to your shared bed to sniff your scent from the sheets. 2 hours, he could do that.
He started weep pathetically. The droplets soaking your blanket. He cried over far more stupid things than this. A crybaby. That was really all he was. He took your pillow, hugging it tightly as if it would disappear at any moment. His eyes closed shut. Whispering, "Haah... I wish you were hugging me... I wish you were here..."
He tried to be a good boy. Tried to keep himself in check. Tried oh-so hard to stop thinking about it. But eventually, the problem in his pants started to hurt. One of his trembling legs dropped over your pillow, while he found the rewarding angle that gave him the most friction. His hand sneaked into his pocket to grab a pair of hidden underwear, there in case of... emergencies.
You came back to your room to retrieve a forgotten item. Just at the right time— catching him grinding against your pillow mindlessly. Your underwear pressed tightly against his nose as he inhaled and exhaled a wail. Moaning louder and more high-pitched than you've ever heard.
"Nghh... m-mommy... Why...? Why did you have to— hic— leave your poor babyboy....?"
You grinned. The newfound information was a treasure. You always wondered if he was into that title. Too timid to talk to you about things like that. He was just adorable. You could hear how close he was when his voice shook. When he chanted your name as if it would ease the pain. Brows crumpled, and sweat rolled down the skin of his forehead.
"Mommy..." His tongue darted out to lick the heavenly taste off the fabric of your panties. His hips rutted to the pillow until a sad, unsatisfying orgasm hit him. He cried miserably. Nose stuffed while he breathed out whimpers. Drool mixed with other liquids pooled down to splatter the pillow. An unusual angry huff coming from his lips. "Why aren't you here?!? Whywhywhywhy!"
Only if he opened his eyes.
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jinxvex · 1 day ago
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OH MY GOSHHHH CRYBABY READER AND CAITLYN 😵‍💫😵‍💫 can we have something like caitlyn fucking crybaby reader with her strap and she is soooo mean about it ☹️ like our makeup is running and she's being so condensing UGH I NEED HER BADDDD
♱ lesson learnt. ♱
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lil drabble bc i’m lazy! + (a oneshot that may or may not involve ellie williams is in the works though…)
syp. mean mommy!cait fucking you with her strap after you got smart in front of her colleagues at a fancy event.
cw: nsfw content!!, strap-on sex, mommy kink, she slaps you once, choking, degradation/mocking, rough sex, vulgar language/cursing (obv), she's real mean!!
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at this point in time, you were unsure what you had said or done to make it to this point.
did you have too much wine? say or do something fucked up because of it? have a little too much attitude? arrogance? conviction? nerve…?
your vision went white simply thinking of reasons as to why or how?
‘where was i?’
‘when the hell did i get here?’
nevertheless, it’s a certain ‘who’ that snaps you out of your self-questioning turmoil with a striking *SLAP!!* across your tear-stained cheek.
“are you even listening to me, whore?” caitlyn spits at you with a venomous tone which is a daunting contrast to her usually sweet and caring voice.
she’s currently looking down at you from above—hands gripping the skin at the back of your thighs and legs planted firmly on the end of the bedspread. her hair is falling out of her neat ponytail and her eyes are dark. the darkest you’ve ever seen them. she has your legs resting on her strong shoulders with your hands bound together by a rope above your head.
the position you’re both in should be considered missionary on steroids because of the way you can feel her cock pressing against your cervix so magnificently yet, almost painfully. she’s pounding into you mercilessly, forcing you to take her cock for the way you acted towards her in public.
“you are so lucky i’m even fucking you right now. so lucky. do you have any idea how foolish you’ve been tonight? a disrespectful little slut, is what you are.”
as you look at her, eyes threatening to roll to the back of your head and tears streaming from your face, you can’t help but silently beg her, what for? who knows? her roughness sparks a string of desire that courses through your veins up to your brain.
“aww, poor girl. it’s so fucking deep, isn’t it? i bet you can feel it in your throat.” she’s taunting you. her dick thrusting inside of your cunt makes nasty, loud sloshy noises—makes your pussy drench the space below you.
“maybe that’s why you’re unable to speak.”
wrapping her hand around your throat, she squeezes harder the faster she moves in and out of you, “you love this. you love it, don’t you, darling? i can tell by the way you’re getting me all wet. so dirty.”
“ungh—f-fuck! y-yes, mommy!!” you respond to her for the first time in what seems like forever.
you feel the pure frustration seeping through her skin into yours, not just because of the sweat dripping from her brow onto your neck but because her stare sears daggers into you everywhere all at once.
“hmm. mommy can’t even punish you properly because you enjoy it. you enjoy being treated like a toy… solely for my usage. mine.”
the more she taunts and teases you, the more slick pools out of your puffy cunt��the more you tip closer to the edge.
“since you enjoy acting so heinously, you’re going to cum so much. so much, you’ll be begging me to stop, sweetheart. but i’m not going to.”
“not until you’ve learnt. your. fucking. lesson.”
AHHH!! i jumped 4 joy when i saw this rq thank u thank u!! 💋
(yes i used the british spelling for ‘learned’ on purpose.)
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jezzzebel · 3 days ago
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A short critique on the (Tumblr) Hellenic Polytheism community
Disclaimer: This is just my opinion / criticism and isn't meant to offend anyone, but rather bring awareness to help build a stronger and more respected community. I am not necessarily a hellenic polytheist , i occasionally worship / honor greek gods. Please be civil in the comments and have common sense. Love yall!!!
Criticism on assumptions and entitlement
I don't like it when people just assume you are a hellenic polytheist on here when you just... Use the #pagan . And this isn't just the case with me. Idk if it's just the prevalence of helpols on Tumblr compared to slavic , roman, celtic.. norse.. other pagan religions.
But that isn't a call to make everything about you.
In the nicest way possible.
I remember making a post about something that is witchcraft related. Then just now i saw a post of a very well known and loved paganism blog quote my post word for word and applying why it's incorrect when it's related to hellenic polytheism.
I haven't used the #helpol in my post. The post was related to deity work in modern day witchcraft. And yet that person decided to , without confrontation in my reblogs and comments, decided to make a post quoting my post most likely because they were afraid of my reaction or starting a drama.
Which is just.?? Weird to me??
If you have something to say to me, we can easily talk about it and i would have explained to you that my post wasn't necessarily about hellenic polytheism... YET like this IT WOULD BE AWKWARD.
I am tired of people assuming that hellenic polytheism is the "main" pagan religion while others are ""exotic birds" ☹️ who can hardly be found.
We are here.
Proper tagging and roman polytheism
I can't be the only one who is annoyed by improper tagging of #helpol content with #roman polytheist content. Fine ,i am guilty of improper tagging as well, WHEN I WAS NEW TO THE APP of course. But why , just why would you tag a post about Zeus with rompol hashtag.
THEY ARE NOT THE SAME DEITIES.
I am sure you wouldn't like it if i tagged content of goddess Vesna as #persephone
It's annoying trying to look for roman polytheism content and seeing the names of greek gods with "roman names" in brackets.
Roman religion IS NOT a copy of greek religion. Pleaseeeee don't make the same mistakes as me and TAG PROPERLY.
Drama and judging others
Fineeee. My last post WAS targeted TOWARDS 5+ posts i have seen today, judging others, and thinking they know everything about someone's practice by just looking at their posts.
What's similar to all those five plus number of posts i have seen JUST TODAY? They were all helpol...
I am not trying to generalize. Of course, gods forbid. There are many amazing hellenic polytheists on Tumblr who understand that not everything you see on internet is how it seems.
Why do you think that it is ABSOLUTELY OKAY to insult others and causing drama just because their practice is different than yours?
And I don't mean "disrespectful different" i mean "unconventional different".
This is prevalent in other pagan communities too, but I could not help but notice the greek gods' names being mentioned the most. It's just sad.
It's just January, January 20th as i am posting this and i have already seen so much drama posts. Do better.
Ignoring ethnic greek voices
This one is self explanatory
Erasing the cultural part in the name of eclecticism
This. This annoys me so much. It's sad. You can't just cut out a part of a cultural religious tradition because you don't like it. And don't twist my words. I REALLY mean " don't like it" or "don't resonate with it"
For more info on what i mean, check out my post on the guest metaphor and open practices.
Myth literalism and demonizing deities
Sorry but yall are guilty of this and it's sadddd 😭
"Zeus is an awful deity because of his myths"
Here are some other myths that make other deities look bad , so you shouldn't worship them: Hera, Artemis, Aphrodite, Poseidon, Athena...
/satire
CONSTANT walking on eggshells and twisting others' words.
I feel like i am constantly walking on thin ice when interacting with the helpol community. It seems like people would rather find a needle in a pile of hay bales than listening to what people have to say.
And i know people will do so with this post.
It's almost like they will try and look for your smallest mistakes and errors to call you out and make a point.
How do we fix this?
A community can never be 100% toxicity free. There will always be bad apples out there. But what we should do is strive to make the community a better and more welcoming place for people. One person can do a lot more than you think they can. YOU can achieve a lot more for the community than you think you can.
If you even read this far. Thank you.
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lotus-pear · 22 days ago
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i love you royal trio (minus akechi)
#i was listening to the world we knew by frank sinatra while drawing this to inflict maximum emotional damage 😔#royal actually shot me fifty times in the chest and slaughtered my entire family#i’m actually inconsolable over the ending what the fuck do you mean akechi chooses to die of his own volition rather than be manipulated#god it’s just. his character actually makes me violent and insane. they’re going to drag me kicking and screaming to the psych ward#he never had an ounce of control over his life. not even once. he was CONSTANTLY being yanked around like a marionette#until he was disposed of as another pawn in shido’s plan#and then out of some cruel irony he was resurrected even though he did not want to be alive#for once in death he would have found peace—only for that to be taken from him too.#and bc he thinks he’s worthless and his life is so easily gambled away he doesn’t view it as a major dealbreaker when maruki brings it up#“do you really think something as trivial as my life should stand in the way of your decision?” yes you fucking asshole#what do you mean he’s literally fated to die in every timeline? definition of doomed by the narrative#there’s not a single version of his story that doesn’t end with him being slaughtered#GODDDDD he makes me violently ill i hate goro akechi so much he’s so fucking selfish HOW CAN YOU NOT SEE THAT THIS DEAL IS TEARING ME APART#i was so tempted to get the bad ending just so that he was alive ☹️#he looked so happy. he was surrounded by people who loved and treasured him.no shido. control over his life. the ability to choose his futu#TEARS IN MY EYES MARUKI WAS THE ONLY VILLAIN WHO WAS LOWKEY MAKING SENSE 😭😭😭😭😭#my toxic trait is that i think maruki was right all along 😔#ALSO SUMIRE AAUUGGHHHH 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#the survivors guilt literally eating her alive until the point where she gaslighted herself into thinking she was her sister. insane.#royal was so good bro i’m so glad i endured 200 hours of hell just to play it#terrible terrible ending with everyone going their separate ways and ren ending up in juvie for months#akechi actually being dead in the good ending is so fucked up 😭😭 i thought there was some way maruki could bring him back regardless#not ren hallucinating him in the last cutscene too 😭😭😭😭 “i still see your shadows in my room” ahh ending#persona 5 royal#persona 5#ren amamiya#akira kurusu#sumire yoshizawa#goro akechi#lotus draws
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exclusively0ccupied · 22 days ago
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grumpy old man becomes a dancing drunk
swansea actually needs more love i will flip underrated much?!!?
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just-some-random-blogger · 3 days ago
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GIRRLLLLLLLL AHAHHAHAH WTFFF 8S THISSSSS NAURRRRRRRRRRR MY HEART GO BOOM BOOM POWWWW
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THERE WAS AN old northern superstition —more like an old wives’ tale, really— that said if there was snow on the wedding day, the marriage was doomed to be a cold one.
CRISTIIIIIII
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WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN WHY ARE YOU STARTING THIS FIC LIKE THIS THAGS SO GOOD ITS DO BEAUTIFUL HOW DO YOU EVEN THINK OF THESE THINGS WHAT THE FUCKKKKKKK 🫵WITCHHHHHH🫵
Cregan had hoped that if not a loving wife, he would get a caring mother to Rickon.
Honestly I hate that for her. And rickon. Poor boy. I mean found family be like.
He would like to say that the days went on the same way they did before he wed you, but it would be a lie. Winterfell ran much better now there was a lady present.
THAT PART 💥💥💥💥💥💥 WHAT THE FUCK DID I FUCKING TELL YOU YOU RAT ASSS I TOLD YOU YOU DONT FUCKING KNOW HER YOUR PRESUMPTUOUS PIECE OF HIT
Cregan had been wrong about you. It seemed like you could run a keep, and you did so with ruthless efficiency.
AND THAT'S ON PERIOD 💯🙏💪🔥
The castle had never been warmer, the meals so well planned. Even the servants seemed happy, now that they didn’t have to follow Cregan’s too broad instructions. It seemed that asking them to clean and cook was a little too vague for their tastes.
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She is that gwORL with the lipgloss unmoving
The lack of sunlight had made you lose your southron tan, leaving you with a look of quiet frailty that made Cregan want to wrap you in a thousand blankets and keep you safe. He just was unsure of the execution.
🤨 honestly 🤚🤚🤚 stay away I will poke your eyes out. Poor bb girl tho.
You seemed at ease enough around Sara, and some other northern ladies, so social interaction wasn’t what you disliked. It was him.
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Never had Winterfell’s corridors been filled with so many women. The northern lords already called you Queen Alysanne’s second coming, with your all female court. The only thing missing was your husband. You didn’t have Cregan’s ear, simply because you didn’t wish to.
PERIOD 💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥 GRIEF IS OVER TIME SO SLAY AND KEKE
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“You intend to honor me by giving me more work?”
HES JUST A MAN 👎👎👎👎
You place your hands on your hips, highlighting your figure, and Cregan is but a man.
PFFFT the way I just said he's just a man. MY GUY YOU RNT UR A DAWWGGGG 👎
It is the wrong thing to say. You bare your fangs then, and Cregan has a moment of absolute and utter clarity. You are not a seahorse. Such a puny creature could never hope to deliver the utter destruction that you cause with your next words.
BEAT HIS ASS
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... Ngl I don't remember the context of this but HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH THE SENTIMENT REMAINS
“Yes, and your precious Arra is dead! She is gone! Why can’t you understand it?” You turn on your heel, face absolutely thunderous, and go to rush out of his chambers.
..... Ngl shes dirty for that. She would stab him if he ever did the same to her with Luke 👎 L work sister. A sad day to be yn. Your honor that wasn't me I would never
Cregan does no longer dream of trying to hunt a seahorse. Instead, he sees the world at a much lower angle than usual, and runs for his life. Somehow, in the dream, he knows a dragon is hunting him.
And you know what he deserves it for underestimating her
I was gonna add that pic of this girl posing then there's like a dragon breathing fire behind her but I couldn't find it lol
Because the boy has gotten sick. And look, you have visited the nursery before, it is a part of your duties. You also cannot deny that you had been curious about the tiny version of your husband that will inherit everything.
☹️ POOR RICKON. I PERSONALLY COULD NEVER HAVE BEEF WITH A CHILD BUT THEN AGAIN I WASNT JUST MARRIED OFF TO A MAN I DONT KNOW OR LIKE
Had you not hardened your heart to it already, you would want one of your own. You know, though, that their only inheritance will be tears and petty squabbles over land, so it’s best they are not born at all. It had been so between your husband’s father and uncle, and it was being so between your mother and your uncle Aegon.
I hate this for her
Jacaerys. You hoped that wherever he was, he was suffering.
HAHAHAHAH I APPROVE THIS MESSAGE
You despised this place, and he had dared plot with your mother behind your back to get you here. With your beast of a husband, and this child of a previous marriage, whose existence would forever ensure your future children would inherit nothing.
The whiplash of the previous sentence being the first part of this paragraph goes crazy my gosh what the fuck
You get him. You would like to cry too.
JAHAHAHAHAHHA SHE SAID I UNDERSTAND YOU HAHAHAHAH U N ME BOTH KID 🤝
He is clearly feeling better if his lungs allow him to shriek like that.
❗❗❗❗NO BUT LIKE HONESTLY. THATS HOW I MEASURE HOW SICK I AM not shrieking but singing. Like if Im not singing I'm fucked. If I start singing again Im getting better 💕
You begin to rock him as you pace through the room. As his tears begin to subside, and he begins to grow curious about the soft song, you realize he is not the threat to your future children you had envisioned. Rickon is beautiful in the manner all babes are, soft and sweet. His little fists cling to your wool cloak, gray eyes meeting yours with fascination.
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I love that for her
Lord Stark is drenched to the bone. His hair is stuck to his head and shoulders, dripping water onto his furs. The cloak he had worn is wet, and he is quick to remove it, leaving him in simple breeches and a jerkin. His face is the picture of worry.
🧍‍♀️ ........ 🫵WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-🫵
“I rode as hard as I dared.”
I have something inappropriate to say. But also 🗣️AS🗣️YOU🗣️ SHOULD 🗣️
His voice is low, pleasantly so. You had never considered the northern accent he sported attractive, but when his voice is gruff, and pitched low, you might see the appeal.
Lol. She said ok and?
The embarrassment from earlier, and the anger at the thought of your husband being soft because you remind him of her make you snap at him.
HONESTLY SHES BEING SO PETTY AND NORMALLY I WOULD BE ON PETTINESS'S SIDE BUT ???? IDK ITS GIVING IRRATIONAL????? IDK IDK LIVE YOUR TRUTH IG???
Why does he keep staring at you? Is he… Oh, by the Seven, he is smiling at you? So softly? You cannot stand it.
Cregan. YN
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Look, princesses do not flee. They simply walk hurriedly. Very hurriedly.
Literally what she thinks of cregan and her reaction to it
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CRISTI IDK WHERE I WAS EXPECTING THIS TO GO BUT IT WENT AND I LOVE IT. IM PATIENTLY SATTTTT EEEK LOVE LOVE LOVE 1000000/10
Winter (Cregan Stark x Reader)
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Summary: As a Princess, you aren’t used to rejection. But Cregan, your husband, has vowed to only ever love one woman, and it isn't you. Right?
Warnings: Mature language. Grief. Toddlers. Unreliable narrators. Miscommunication.
A/N: I was so excited about this chapter! These scenes are the ones I wrote first. Also, the biggest hug to anyone who is reading this. I had not expected the amount of love my first chapter got, and I am so grateful!
THERE WAS AN old northern superstition —more like an old wives’ tale, really— that said if there was snow on the wedding day, the marriage was doomed to be a cold one.
It hadn’t been snowing the day Cregan had married you, but his marriage was proving to be icier than the lands beyond the wall. You weren’t interested in spending time with him at all, and you actively tried to avoid him. He had tried to convince you to share rooms, trying to foster some intimacy, to no avail.
Cregan had hoped that if not a loving wife, he would get a caring mother to Rickon. The boy was too small to grow without one, not yet having reached his third nameday. But you hadn’t shown interest in that either. Instead, you pretended the two of them didn’t exist.
He would like to say that the days went on the same way they did before he wed you, but it would be a lie. Winterfell ran much better now there was a lady present. Cregan had been wrong about you. It seemed like you could run a keep, and you did so with ruthless efficiency.
The castle had never been warmer, the meals so well planned. Even the servants seemed happy, now that they didn’t have to follow Cregan’s too broad instructions. It seemed that asking them to clean and cook was a little too vague for their tastes.
As for you, grief still followed you around, like a too long shadow that refused to budge even in the face of Winterfell’s brightest light. Sara had befriended you, with little success. While you had been far more welcoming to her, you still looked constantly tired and sad.
The lack of sunlight had made you lose your southron tan, leaving you with a look of quiet frailty that made Cregan want to wrap you in a thousand blankets and keep you safe. He just was unsure of the execution.
You scared him. He was man enough to admit it. People were often afraid of things they didn’t understand, and Cregan was no exception. You were made of absolute ice. There was no better description. Cold, but as fragile as glass.
He was running out of ideas on how to bond with you. Invitations to tea were denied, nor did you want to ride with him to see his tenants. You seemed at ease enough around Sara, and some other northern ladies, so social interaction wasn’t what you disliked. It was him.
Never had Winterfell’s corridors been filled with so many women. The northern lords already called you Queen Alysanne’s second coming, with your all female court. The only thing missing was your husband. You didn’t have Cregan’s ear, simply because you didn’t wish to. He would support your endeavors if you asked him to. He had offered his help with your attempts to establish a charity, since the North didn’t have Septas to take care of it, but you had proudly rebuffed him.
There was no pleasing you. He was at his wits’ end. Hence, the awful choice he had made that day.
To try to force you to be in his company.
“Why are you ordering my servants around?” You complain, barging into his chambers. While usually the kitchens were the domain of the Lady of the household, Cregan didn’t know you took it so seriously. “Do you not think me capable enough?”
“I do!” Cregan sits up in his bed, bewildered. He had given the orders around lunchtime, hoping you would not find out, yet here you were, less than half a day later. Far more soon than he had expected. “I just want to throw a feast to honor you.”
“You intend to honor me by giving me more work?” You place your hands on your hips, highlighting your figure, and Cregan is but a man. He cannot help himself, his eyes lingering for a second too long, and his brain coming with no response to your statement.
You seem to take his silence for affirmation.
“Seriously? Do you at least have a guest list?”
And your tone is so haughty, your words betraying you believe Cregan to be an absolute imbecile, he cannot help but give a heated retort.
“Of course I have. Truly, I am more than capable of organizing it on my own. Arra let me do it a few times, and I was unmarried for quite a while. I am experienced enough to…”
It is the wrong thing to say. You bare your fangs then, and Cregan has a moment of absolute and utter clarity. You are not a seahorse. Such a puny creature could never hope to deliver the utter destruction that you cause with your next words.
“Yes, and your precious Arra is dead! She is gone! Why can’t you understand it?” You turn on your heel, face absolutely thunderous, and go to rush out of his chambers.
Cregan loses his head fully, then. He grabs you by the arm, hard enough to hurt, and forces you to face him. For a frightening moment, he fears himself. Fears the wolf, the one screaming for him to strike you and remind you of your place.
How dare you come in his chambers, uninvited, after rejecting all his offers of companionship, to lecture him on grief? As if he could forget Arra was dead. It wasn’t so long ago that Rickon cried for his mother still, unable to understand why he didn’t have one. It wasn’t so long ago that Sara had to take over the role of Lady of the House, and suffered mockery from it. And it wasn’t so long ago, Cregan woke with a scream choked in his throat, reliving that awful morning in every dream he had.
He still did, sometimes. Less, now that he had more urgent matters to occupy himself with. Cregan was ashamed to admit it, but before Jacaerys and your arrival here, Winterfell had been far too empty to keep the ghosts away.
Now, with the war, and the flurry of activities that seemed to follow you, Cregan had little time to dwell much in his dark thoughts. Throwing himself into his work had allowed him to begin healing a wound he wasn’t even aware existed.
And wasn’t that a terrible thought? That Cregan was a man who thrived on war and hunger? Winter was coming, after all. It wouldn’t catch him unprepared.
He had sworn a vow to protect you. As long as Jacaerys had no children, you were third in line to the Iron Throne. To think of hurting you was not only to think of staining his honor, but to think of treason.
Cregan holds you there for a second longer, curious about your reaction. His grip must be bruising on your arm, he can feel the delicate bones under your flesh shift with how hard he is holding you. Yet, you show no fear. Your hands are balled into fists.
Were he to strike, you would strike back. Your face is the very picture of anger, your body coiled and ready to tear him apart.
He throws the feast. You sit next to him in icy silence and somehow manage to speak and dance with all the guests but him.
Cregan does no longer dream of trying to hunt a seahorse. Instead, he sees the world at a much lower angle than usual, and runs for his life. Somehow, in the dream, he knows a dragon is hunting him.
OF COURSE IT is today. The only day you actually wish your Lord Husband to be in the castle, and he is not.
You had spent many of your days fervently praying for him to leave on an errand, and yet, the day he does, you cannot even enjoy it.
Because the boy has gotten sick. And look, you have visited the nursery before, it is a part of your duties. You also cannot deny that you had been curious about the tiny version of your husband that will inherit everything.
The boy is cute, you suppose. In the manner all babes are. He is well-behaved, and quiet, and takes well to his teachings, even if they involve only naming things aloud.
Had you not hardened your heart to it already, you would want one of your own. You know, though, that their only inheritance will be tears and petty squabbles over land, so it’s best they are not born at all. It had been so between your husband’s father and uncle, and it was being so between your mother and your uncle Aegon.
The only assurance a woman has in a life spent as little more than property is her children. They are to inherit their father’s lands, and that is supposed to be enough. But for the second sons, said promise is always broken.
You had never, not once, thought you would come to understand Alicent, yet here you were.
You reflect on this as you hurry to the nursery, worried the damn boy will die before you reach it. When you get there, you feel the urge to scream. There is not one, but three serving girls hovering by the door, and the Maester is mixing some herbs in a chalice.
The child sleeps peacefully, unaware the surrounding turmoil. He looks impossibly small in his bed of furs, shirt open and chest covered in strange poultices. The boy… No, Rickon, had taken ill after the first snow. Perhaps he had been spending too much time playing outside, or he lingered too much in his wet clothes. You wouldn't know. You tried to avoid him as much as you could.
After this was over, you would have a stern talk with his maids. They shouldn’t be this careless. This was your husband’s heir. Someone had to care about him.
Not you. Never you.
“Will he be alright?” You ask, as the Maester places a wet cloth on his forehead. You have never liked children, never having had the chance to be one yourself. Your mother’s constant quest for the Iron Throne and her love for Daemon had often left you in the hands of the help. And when you were old enough, you had to take the role of the mature sibling alongside Jacaerys, helping raise your brothers.
Jacaerys. You hoped that wherever he was, he was suffering. You despised this place, and he had dared plot with your mother behind your back to get you here. With your beast of a husband, and this child of a previous marriage, whose existence would forever ensure your future children would inherit nothing.
You weren’t going to have children. Despite loving children, you despise your husband too much to ever lay with him. But most of all, you are beginning to fear you will become a damn Hightower. You feared that if you had children and faced the prospect of them only being second sons, you might be tempted to start a war too.
“He will, Princess.” The Maester, unaware of your inner turmoil, places a reassuring hand on your arm. He surely believes in the gentle hearts of women, or some nonsense like that. “The fever will lower with the tea we gave him, and the cool cloth on his forehead. His lungs are strong. He will breathe normally soon.”
The boy’s chest flutters oddly. His ribs show with each inhale, depicting his trouble breathing. You cast a dubious look at the cool cloth. If this was all they could do, it was no wonder your grandfather had been rotting alive.
“Is that all you have to say? Why do his ribs show?” You do your best to channel your mother, tone imperious. “If this is truly…” Before you can insult him by calling him the worst the Citadel has to offer, a boy comes in. You let out a sigh of relief, your desire to berate the Maester subsiding. It’s the same boy you had sent to Castle Cerwyn to retrieve your husband.
“Princess!” He says, extending a hand to you. Much to your astonishment, he hands back the message you had sent to Lord Cregan. “I have grievous news. The road to Castle Cerwyn is fully blocked. I couldn’t get past the river. I cannot go over it either and avoid the forest, for it is not fully frozen.”
“This cannot be!” You say, crossing your arms over your chest. Cursed your husband, and his plans to visit the Cerwyns’ tenants today, of all days. “You have to get Lord Cregan. Send a more experienced rider.”
“My lady, I would advise not to.” The Maester says, meekly. “Even if the rider does manage to get past, it is very likely Lord Stark is in the village, snowed in.”
“Well, then send a damn search party!” You yell, uncaring your language is unbecoming of a Princess. You cannot be here while the child… While Rickon dies. The child has a parent, and it is your husband, you do not even care for him!
“It is not as simple.” The Maester cringes when you turn on him.
“Of course it isn’t. The only simple thing is the cure for the child’s malady, isn’t it?” You growl. “Do something useful, if you think a rider cannot reach my husband. Get me someone who can, and fix the boy.”
It would be easier for you if the boy died. You could have the children you so craved. The obstacle would have removed itself. Relationships between half brothers are never as strong as between full ones. At the very least, this child could cast out you and any children you birth when Lord Cregan passes. At the very worst, he might have them killed, as your mother intended with her usurper brother.
But you are not so craven as to let an innocent die. He is still a boy, no older than three namedays. He is vulnerable, and his father is not here.
You sit next to the bed, eyes fixed on his chest. Rickon will not die on your watch.
THE SOUND OF a door opening jerks you awake. Disoriented, you sit up on your chair, and check that Rickon still breathes.
He does. He has awakened with the sound of the door opening, just as you did. But unlike you, he has begun wailing. You get him. You would like to cry too.
“What is it?” You snarl at the serving girl who dared enter in such a manner. The sound of Rickon’s cries grate in your ears, shrill and loud, awakening you fully. You try to coax him into laying back down to no avail.
“Milady…” She stammers, holding a breakfast tray. The reason for her interruption becomes clear. Had it been so long already? You remembered standing vigil over Rickon until sundown, and changing the cool compress a few times after, but no further. By the Seven, you were a terrible caretaker. “I… There are…”
Rickon wails harder.
“Father! Father, want father!” He cries. He then attempts to remove the cool cloth from his forehead, and get up, escaping the furs laid over him.
The serving girl stares at the boy. You stare at her. Rickon continues to squirm. When it is clear she is expecting you to soothe him, you sigh and turn to the child.
“Rickon, you have to lay down again.”
“Father! Father!” He wails, face beginning to turn red, his breathing labored. You are unsure if it is his distress or the sickness, but it worries you nonetheless. The child cannot die. You are not prepared to deal with it.
“Shh, Rickon, I know you are hurting.” You tell him, as you pick him up. “Father is not here. He is trapped by the snow.”
At this, he cries harder. You can hear him gasping for air as he squirms in your arms and kicks at you. His snot is getting everywhere. Good Gods, what if he dies? Would your husband actually force you consummate the marriage if he loses his heir? The thought alone is enough to force you into action.
“He is not trapped. He is snowed in, just as when you cannot go out and play. Happens all the time.” You reassure him, rubbing his back. You know your words to be a lie, but the boy doesn’t. The weather has been especially rough this season. The snow storm is unusual in its fierceness. “He will be back soon.”
Rickon perks up at that.
“He will?”
“As soon as he can.” You promise, hoping it is the case. In truth, you do not know. Your husband is unaware Rickon is ill, and holds no fondness for you. You doubt he will be rushing once the road clears. In fact, you think he might be celebrating the weather and praising his northern gods for the excuse to get a respite from you.
Well, too bad. You would send men each hour to check if the storm waned and the road was accessible once more. He would have to come and tend to his child.
“Where is father?” Rickon asks you, a suspicious look in his little face. He is eerily similar to your husband. His sobs have turned more subdued.
“With Lord Cerwyn.”
“Why? Hurts! Father!” The boy demands, petulantly. He is clearly feeling better if his lungs allow him to shriek like that. You are no healer, but his agitation is worrying you. What if he has a fit because he overexerted himself and then dies?
“I want your father too.” You mutter under your breath. “You do not see me wailing.”
“I love father.” He sobs. “Want him.”
And you are not made of stone. You have never been, no matter how hard you pretend. He is still a babe, hands chubby, face round. He still smells like one, a mix of the nursery, and sweet innocence.
Without even realizing it, you have cradled him into your arms and begun rocking the two of you. He keeps wailing, so you begin singing.
“I loved a maid…” There is no need to be a good singer to soothe babies. You are unsure of what they like about it, but you know it works. It had worked for Aegon and Viserys, why not for Rickon? “As fair as summer, who had sunlight in her hair….”
You begin to rock him as you pace through the room. As his tears begin to subside, and he begins to grow curious about the soft song, you realize he is not the threat to your future children you had envisioned. Rickon is beautiful in the manner all babes are, soft and sweet. His little fists cling to your wool cloak, gray eyes meeting yours with fascination.
Charmed by him, you keep singing. Seasons of my love is enlarged and repeated ten times over, and now includes verses about northern babies who look exactly like their father.
“I loved a boy…” You hum, softly. It feels like hours have passed when Rickon’s eyes finally begin to drop. Of course he would enjoy the verses about winter the most. “As white as winter, with moonglow in his hair.”
The door opens, slowly. You hear the wood groan as it does, but Rickon takes no notice. He burrows his head next to your heart, yawning.
You turn to look at the newcomer, pleased that having put the fear of the gods into the maid who had dared enter before had proven fruitful. The pleased smile drops from your face when you realize it is your husband.
Lord Stark is drenched to the bone. His hair is stuck to his head and shoulders, dripping water onto his furs. The cloak he had worn is wet, and he is quick to remove it, leaving him in simple breeches and a jerkin. His face is the picture of worry.
“I rode as hard as I dared.” His voice is low, pleasantly so. You had never considered the northern accent he sported attractive, but when his voice is gruff, and pitched low, you might see the appeal. “How is he?”
He shouldn’t have bothered with the low tone. Rickon would recognize his voice everywhere because he perks up considerably.
“Father! Father!” Rickon claps. He attempts turning in your grip to look at your husband, which makes you fear he might fall, so you perch him on your hip so he can do so.
“The fever has broken.” You hand Rickon back to him, feeling a hint of embarrassment when his eyes linger on the way you had been holding him. “He’ll live.”
“Thank you.” And his voice is earnest and soft, and it makes you wonder what he sees when he looks at you. Is it her still? Does Arra Norrey stand in this room with you, too?
The embarrassment from earlier, and the anger at the thought of your husband being soft because you remind him of her make you snap at him.
“It’s fine. I missed my siblings.” You cross your arms over your chest, awkward. Why does he keep staring at you? Is he… Oh, by the Seven, he is smiling at you? So softly? You cannot stand it. “I will send for a bath for you and Rickon, after washing myself. Less I catch a cold too.”
Look, princesses do not flee. They simply walk hurriedly. Very hurriedly.
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locallygrowndaikon · 6 months ago
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GANG IVE BARELY BEEN LOGGING ON SKY THESE DAYS WHATCHU TALKIN BOUT GANG 😭😭🙏🙏🙏🙏
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yogurtlid10000 · 7 months ago
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Drew transformers from memory the other day.
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arevixie · 10 months ago
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winter may be over but gogoat sycamore is forever
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mikalilys · 2 months ago
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Tonya and Tomny and Remus
AGHHHHHHHHSVSHHHHHHHAHHHHJHHHHHHHHHHHHHH OH MY FUCKING GOD I LOVE THEM SO MUCHHHHH I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH MYSELF AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHGHHHHHHHHH Ahhhhhhh ah ah 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 Ahhhh ah ☹️
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norrisgrl · 1 year ago
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alright, yesterday i was watching videos/pictures of lando and i sTARTED CRYING
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yioh · 1 month ago
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i miss being excited about anime announcements :( i feel like everything these days are just season 2’s for anime i don’t care abt😭 and there will be a new original anime once in a blue moon which just doesn’t happen to interest me :( like what happened to shit like steins gate, psycho pass, death parade, terror in resonance, charlotte, march comes in like a lion etc etc why is everything just sooooooooooooooo boring now 😭
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bunveh · 19 days ago
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I ᰔᩚ the (female) traveller & citlali’s interactions :c
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artem1sc0re · 1 month ago
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Mr. Lienen || The Lonely Fox
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fizzytoo · 2 years ago
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just two friends in the gym they might kiss
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