#it’s honestly just so unfair lol
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The First Time Tetchou placed Jouno above Justice:
The Airport Scene TM is so significant for SGK cuz it marks the first major instance of Tetchou placing something above justice (Jouno). And while it is a 🤌 of a scene, I actually think this was the SECOND time Tetchou prioritized Jouno instead of justice.
When was the first time? It was during the first couple years after Jouno joined.
As much I absolutely LOVE current Tetchou’s unyielding devotion to Jouno, I honestly don’t think that’s how he’s always felt. In fact, I think that he originally hated him and that these two were actually enemies to lovers. This gradual shift marked the first time Tetchou placed Jouno above justice. Lemme explain.
Jouno was literally everything Tetchou stood against when he first joined. An unfeeling, murderous criminal who was allowed to basically get away with it all scot free. Not even JUST getting away with it, no, this filthy criminal actually got REWARDED with actual Hunting Dog status. In other words Jouno literally escaped justice. Ofc, Tetchou was gonna absolutely hate his guts. He swore he would never see this murderer as a Hunting Dog. In his mind, the only way this injustice would be righted is when Jouno finally paid for his crimes and faced capital punishment.
But then something insane happens; the ex-mafioso actually changes. Tetchou starts to see him casually risking his own life to save innocent civilians. He starts to notice the very faint, slightly flustered (and cute) smile on Jouno’s face whenever said civilians would thank him for rescuing them. In just a year, Jouno’s dedication to the HD manages to rival even that of his own. And that’s when Tetchou realizes he was wrong about Jouno and that somehow, this man has actually started to grow on him. (Don’t get me wrong; Jouno does still have his sadistic side that occasionally riles up Tetchou, but it’s rly more of a minor annoyance rather than anything serious anymore.)
But that’s when reality hits him. Jouno’s recent change in behaviour still does not erase his crimes. At the end of the day, he should still be on death row. Nothing about this situation has changed; in the eyes of justice, Jouno is still a criminal. Tetchou should still hate him. It shouldn’t matter that Jouno feels just so fun to be around despite because of his cattiness or that he has an utterly adorable smile, or that he never hesitates to protect the weak, or that he’s just become so stupidly endearing to Tetchou that it’s honestly overwhelming at times.
And yet… it DOES matter. Somehow the thought of Jouno dying has gone from something jubilating to utterly terrifying for Tetchou. Try as he might, he just can’t see Jouno as a criminal anymore; all he sees is a Hunting Dog; a hero. But again, he knows he can’t like Jouno and still claim to be a follower of justice.
And so, Tetchou decides to make an exception to his justice philosophy. Realizing that he just can’t hate Jouno anymore (and rly, doesn’t ever want to) Tetchou Suehiro, CHOOSES to place his love for his beloved partner above his love for justice, for the first (but definitely not last) time.
#bungo stray dogs#bsd#tetchou suehiro#jouno saigiku#hunting dogs bsd#suegiku#god we are literally STARVED of SGK content#it’s honestly just so unfair lol#I also had like a little side note I was gonna add but that got so stupidly big i decided to make it its own post rather than make u guys#suffer even more lol#I’ll hopefully be posting that ‘side note’ soon (maybe)#I’m writing about SGK at 3am again…#what. a. surprise.#I love Suegiku#Enemies-to-lovers SGK my beloved#(even tho I’m not even that big of a fan of Enemies-to-Lovers tbh lol#it just ✨works✨ here for some reason#I absolutely NEED more SGK backstory-
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love thinking kipperlilly spends her afterlife looking for lucy in a familiar forest
#not art#fhjy#fhjy spoilers#like. does she have a mean of knowing lucy and yolanda got sent to cassandra's domain to hang out for a bit#kipperlilly's isolation means so much to me. she is punished for everything she's done she just doesn't pick up on it#until the moment she dies! one more funky thing that mirrors riz in which he's actively tried to cultivate a community and denied it#until the bad kids. while kipperlilly does not want or care about a community she just wants someone who validates her#but she does Need a community so she latches onto the person she lets closer to her to fulfill her emotional needs#she took the ritual willingly so this might genuinely be her first death. probably terrifying#probably not even enough bandwidth to feel mortified. maybe immediately seeking something comforting out of instinct alone#lmao honestly thinking too much abt fantasy high afterlifes gives me a headache And a visceral fear#Im not religious but I grew up in a culture with a dominantly buddhist/taoist cosmology its Scary that u just go to A Place after u die!!#and then ur still urself!!! thats scary to me what do u mean u stay like that forever. thats fucked#but yeah I think this influences how I see kipperlilly turn out a little bit. in a sense I think of her as being a ghost now#yknow. trying to solve something from life so she can move on and. stop living this life etc#man the reveal that lucy took being killed pretty seriously and is like yeah the others are decent and even sweet#and probably was just trying to hold her party together and do what she thinks is moral by hearing kipperlilly out#lol lmao etc. gods I gotta wonder how kipperlilly's mindset handled jawbones' help#it really is damn tragic tho. I stand by what I said folks like this will complain and be nasty to be around#but they dont have enough desire to inconvenience themselves to off the bat do something abt what they find unfair or whatever#its when theyre handed the seemingly very easy means to be right that they'll start being dangerous#its horribly tragic that the supposed metaplayer and the self-perceived mastermind turned out to ultimately be just an useful idiot#yknow what. I think personally in my heart kipperlilly moves on from her afterlife the moment she says sorry#doesnt even have to be to lucy but that's probably gonna be who received it#ah.... teenage rebellion. teenage gamejacking
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not gonna lie i loooooove all the different flavors of guilt that gunter would have if he gets romantically/sexually involved with corrin.
off the top of my head you've got a choice of:
* guilt over the obvious age difference and yeah, i'm gonna say it: him raising corrin as a father figure (corrin's line lol). it's not *not* a skeevy look. even if they start their relationship years after the game events (doubtful, with his age). personally love how their S-support indirectly acknowledges this with him dancing around a way of getting her to reject him without either one of them acknowledging that he has feelings for her in the first place. mind games right from the start!!! (fuckin. hilariously backfired on the old man when he realizes corrin's even more thirsty for him.)
* sort of related with the above re: the mentor/mentee power differential guilt at bare minimum. this one kind of lessens as corrin grows into the authority of a royal, but it's pretty obvious she still has a authorital respect towards him in every route. i know for sure he'd have occasional pangs of guilt as to if he's taking advantage of her trust there.
* garon's "father""" connection with corrin. >:)c and just. holy fuck the potent hatred gunter has against garon and it bleeding out on corrin in the bedroom. him wanting to possessively mark corrin-as-garon's-heir as his (-and then him having the understandable horror/guilt over that.)
* (conquest-specific) guilt over not telling corrin about his late wife and all the skeletons that would dredge up. i honestly headcanon that in cq he never mentions his history to corrin just to let sleeping dogs lie and avoid painful questions, but it forever remains a kind of albatross around his neck. that's not even counting widower's guilt on some level - he's human, it happens.
* (revelation-specific) guilt over whether anankos manipulated any affections/lust for corrin just to get closer to her... >:3c (what if hell, he's right?)
* revelation also has loads more with guilt over his possessed actions. and then guilt if they're fucking while he's possessed and he can't tell corrin anything. and and and-
* more generic guilt that a commoner (and punished for being a commoner) knight lusting over his liege/princess, especially if you introduce pregnancy/children/heirs as a factor.
* we're straying into blatantly headcanon territory briefly here but [mumbles something about my sadist/top/kinky thoughts >_>]
* more benign guilt over him being obviously older and dying earlier/being dependent on corrin when he becomes invalid. lots of conflicted feelings about wanting her but realizing it's a selfish want when he's going to break her heart by dying at minimum 20+ years earlier even if you introduce some magical shit.
like dear lord
the guilt with the already potent chemistry i see those two having would be one hell of a cocktail of unresolved sexual tension, and i don't think it goes away even if they do consummate it .....
#[at the drive through with the biggest grin] i'll have the whole menu sir#honestly this is a load bearing appeal of gunter/corrin for me. there's so MUCH delicious guilt to mix and match in bed lol#given fe in general treats its knights like boring af lawful good types#(okay that's unfair. there's some cool knight characters. just personally most don't feel like they could Fuck Nasty you know?)#THIS guy on the other hand. yowieee. you get the Fuck Nasty *and* the genuinely decent widow dad who's plagued by guilt. delicious.#finally some good fucking food dot jpg#leigh you have damn good taste
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(character uses he/they)
recently got to give bg3 a try n kinda just used it as an excuse to work on a design ive been struggling with. reminds me a lot of making murder lizards in skyrim as a middle schooler it's fun :3
#baldur's gate 3#bg3#bg3 fanart#dnd#dnd art#dragonborn#fursona#dragonsona#oc#oc: lizal#isekai'ing in my fursona was kind of a joke just to figure out how the game works and NOW i'm trying to make an actual durge#it's. uh. an interesting game to say the least lol#i'm wondering if there's a reason i've heard so much about the romances but not hardly anything about the gameplay#but that might be an unfair thing to say since i've only ever played the same Kind of rpgs before and i've NEVER played dnd#or other games based on its mechanics#i'm honestly just glad i can try it for free on my brother's library cuz i wouldn't have been interested otherwise hfgkfdg#''what characters do you like'' the durge. that's it. i like this freak and only this freak so far.
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brought to you by me hosting a friend for two days who grew up in the same cultural region, and tbh will not be invited again.
#night two of spontaneously showering for over an hour with no notice just as i indicated i wanted to go to bed...#pls consider. i have to shit lol#i also have meds#i'd honestly make fuckin due if i'd had the indicators to like. idk say oh i need to grab my meds first#but also idk how to put it other than this is one of. so many behaviors that are making me just about reconsider the friendship as a whole#within 2 days#i lowkey wanna cry because this has gone so badly overall#and i feel like i'm in a position where it's both unfair for me to not communicate this distress (because maybe we could work it out)#but also if i do communicate. this individual was having and is now coming out of a hypomanic episode where they kept talking about#self harm related habits and displaying self hatred for the mildest of critiques#and they've never communicated what to do in these situations previously so idk their boundaries and honestly don't trust them to establish#boundaries that they would benefit from because they have a large history of that#so uh. yeah in conclusion i am counting the hours til they leave and i can more easily try to figure out how the fuck to handle this
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Eyesome propaganda (Patreon)
#Doodles#Wander Over Yonder#Commander Peepers#Emperor Awesome#Eyesome#So hey I love them also#Have I mentioned lately that I'm a polyshipper lol#Then again Peepers is like impossible not to ship with multiple cast members so there's that lol#He just so happens to very neatly fit into my niche!#I'm sure he's very happy about it lol#Stick that man in situations stat#This is also slightly Awesome propaganda because I do genuinely think he At The Very Least has the potential to be very interesting#He's misused in episodes like Bad Neighbors but tbh who isn't :P Shame it's one of his and the Fist Fighters' few episodes unfair#My favourite appearance of his is probably The Cool Guy :D He gets to show off some of his more interesting facets!#Like the fact that he's decently good at reading people - owed to or reason for his popularity? You decide lol#And to that end manipulating people - he sees what someone wants and ''gives'' it to them for a price >:)#That's honestly why I think him pursuing a relationship/manipulation strike with Peepers would be so interesting#Peepers is ''real'' for lack of a better word lol - he's highly dedicated to his beliefs and motives and isn't one to fold easily#Awesome is the opposite - he's a cowardly hedonist who enjoys his shallow lifestyle as it affords him carnal comforts above all else#So their dynamic is an interesting one I think! :D I think they'd serve each other well haha ♪#Peepers gets to cut loose a bit and Awesome is forced to develop a genuine relationship to some degree#And then there's also the size difference again lol - look some things are allowed to be exactly their face value! Haha#Peepers is so flipping cute hhggg I love him <3 And Awesome is so fun to draw in that mix of cartoony and Slight-slightly more realistic#His proportions are still extremely cartoony but drawing him with proper pectorals and a ribcage and the like is so fun <3 <3#Peepers is still the most fun to pose tho I just feel so free to stretch and squish him around haha#Him sitting! Him laying down blustered! Pressing his feet against Awesome's chest to try to push away from him!! He's so fun!!#Plus finally drawing the more-than-half-closed eye style as sometimes featured ahhhhh <3 <3 This show man I swear#Not even mentioning going back to three-finger after so long on four haha ♪ It's been a while and it's just as fun!
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there we go I'm pretty sure I've gotten all the endings of returnal, including the tower of sisyphus ones! amazing game, enthralling gameplay, stunning art direction, phenomenal pacing of introducing new environments and elements (this is maybe the thing that has me most impressed, actually -- it really felt like they found the perfect pace to take between letting you settle in with skill or place or element, and introducing a new one, there was this perfect sense of discovery and mastery that rarely got boring or overwhelming and had me in a constant state of pleasant surprise and intrigue), psychologically evocative story with some of the most deliciously insidious ludonarrative resonance I have ever seen, we must imagine selene if not happy (definitely not happy) then at least somehow at home in hell.
...and still somehow 11 days until veilguard releases :')
#returnal#this game is pretty difficult I honestly thought it would keep me much longer but I have uh. I have played it A Lot this week fhskda#I have like 30 out of 38 achievements now and I think most of the last eight are the grindfest ones based in random drops#I beat algos in level 3 too early to get the ending b/c you have to go through all the poppy memories first#so I had to do a whole run just to get the proper ending lol. uplifting stuff of course as you might expect from this game#also discovering this is probably a finnish studio by seeing all the finnish names in the credits (which have rolled like... four times now#I was less enthused with the endless mode -- it really does feel like grinding for a more op gun to do most of your work for you#and I missed exploring new environments a lot. BUT it adds some very interesting stuff to the story!#and if you want to grind weapon trait unlocks I think it's your friend#I actually preferred some of the early game stuff without all the op traits -- the pure back and forth dance of it --#but I'm like that in soulsborne games too I prefer that rhythm to getting clever with it lol#abyssal scar is deeply unfair if you don't have some of that to help you along tho so *shrug* it is what it is and still very very fun#can't believe they got the cutest most floppy-haired kid ever to be helios btw. awful. terrible. all is suffering#I suspect I will have 'don't fear the reaper' on repeat in my head for approximately three months after all of this
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I know there are as many religious good guys as there are religious bad guys in IDW, but I think I pinned down the reason why it feels like the most prominent religious figures are all bad guys and it's pretty much due to the worldbuilding.
Maybe my memory of the comics is just really bad, but the religious worldbuilding in IDW is....kind of trash honestly. I'm not sure there's a single religion or religious custom that doesn't exist solely to further the plot along. Like, it's one thing for the Camiens to worship the Primes and that causes a lot of stuff in exRID/OP, but what does that worship actually look like? What are their holidays, customs, religious texts? What about "spectralism" which basically the only thing we know about is the Festival of the Lost Light and some hippie color coding and aura shit? Like sure, there are characters who are religious and their beliefs come into play sometimes, but it honestly feels (especially in MTMTE) more like their religiousness only exists when it's relevant to the plot and it's just kinda. Disappointing eh. Lacking in worldbuilding. Plus the more religious a character is the more it's written as their entire personality and the driving force making them evil so it just kinda made me cringe to read honestly.
#squiggposting#i think there might be more 'religious moments' than i remember since it's been a hot minute since i read#but i remember during my first read/while liveblogging it was something that disappointed me#i know it's probably unfair or whatever but it still makes me cringe so hard#that the reason tyrest suddenly became a religious zealot was because he got shot with a brain altering bullet#and his religious fervor is almost literally just a product of him being brain damaged and delusional#like oooooooooooooooooooooooof it's so fucking cringe lol#i'm not sure if i'm making sense honestly. it's not so much the NUMBER of evil vs non evil religious characters#but it's more like. the more prominently religion is part of a character's personality or motivation#the odds of them just being an evil guy shoots up to almost 100%#also then there's dr/ft who's a fucking clown and 'spectralism' is just some half baked hippie shit i can't take seriously#guess my problem isn't with IDW so much as it is with JRO lol#anyways not an objective analysis i might be wrong on some counts that was just my feelings as i read#and also i just don't like it when the worldbuilding around culture only exists when it comes to plot related stuff#it really makes the world feel less lived in/realistic when it's established that there are multiple religions#but then as far as actual customs- beliefs- texts- philosophies- etc there's hardly anything#so the good guys may be religious but there's not much about what their beliefs actually entail and how they impact their daily life#and on the other hand the bad guys are screaming about how they're god's chosen all over the place
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triple / wipeout i got today! i'm so happy to have gotten e-liter to 4 stars, it's probably been the most fun i've had playing the game recently :3 (tfw you only started playing it regularly like.. last month.. idk what this says about me)
#splatoon 3#lizz.mp4#lizz.jpg#looking back i definitely could've walked over to the e-liter quicker but also i've never been on the enemy plat for mincemeat before#so i didn't know at what angle i was supposed to shoot them at#sorry for the octobrush for making them rage quit (not really)#tbf earlier in the match i DID have a bullshit looking ass snipe where they were climbing a wall and then i shot them right when they#finished climbing and from their perspective it probably looks unfair lmaoo#but i did see their ink trail swimming in the direction of that wall so i had a hunch they'd emerge from their lol#anyway. i love e-liter. i still play other weapons but e-liter has been taking up soo much of my brain space its not funny#i wouldn't be surprised if it's the 2nd weapon i 5 star bc honestly every time i play it i dont feel like switching off of it to smthn else#so it'd feel like less of a grind compared to smthn like reeflux which. while i love it dearly. i only have so much tolerance for it#before i go 'I MISS HAVING RANGE.' anyways! i swear one day i'll post things that aren't snipes#silly snipes!#i dont think i'd post much of reload on this account. i might just make gifsets and post them on main#and im not gonna liveblog it either#but god. im so excited hehe
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its 'i know it doesnt matter and im used to it at this point but im actually a little sad that im kinda ugly' hours
#its ok ill stop thinking about it in a moment but yeah. thats what happens when i see pictures of myself next to my friends#they're all so hot and beautiful this is like. kinda unfair ngl lol#and like. i realise they dont mean those as actually backhanded compliments. but it sure does feel that way#most of the time i do try to embrace it and ive mostly made piece with the fact that im not here to be pretty but to be weird and funny#peace ffs*#but sometimes you'd just want to see a candid photo someone took of you when you weren't looking#and not feel the need to immediately turn it into a joke because the only alternative available is to confront that the fact that you are.#indeed. Fucking Ugly lol#like idk. i genuinely dont mind that when im with my friends at home. but here all the girls at this fucking uni#are so OBSESSED with their looks#and i was kinda mean to one yesterday. still in a haha-jokey way but goddammit i hate how good it felt#cause like girl. dont think i dont know what you're doing when we're taking selfies. and its okay.#i can be The Ugly Friend That's Only There To Make You Even Prettier. i can be that. but i want you to KNOW that I KNOW.#you're not fooling me darling <3 and i honestly find it even more insulting that you'd think you could lol#babygirl ive been doing *this* my whole life. believe me i know how to stop that fucking behaviour. you're not being as subtle as you think#*spot lol#peace and love but i really would be SUCH a different person if i were pretty its not even funny. so maybe it's for the better huh
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would it weird if i like. LMAO. ...
#would it be weird if i just randomly opened up commissions (match-ups/caks/relationship analysis)#even tho i literally cannot think of a dam word to post here#i mean i can i just hate all my writing right now#all of it#is that unfair tho? to u guys? to stick u with my Bad State stuff#im okay at matchups and money and free time would motivate me but#i feel like thats cheating somehow#to do that but not This (which i really want to be doing but . kindof hate myself too much to rn)#im jus struggling and panicking right now u know?#w/ my roommate and my mom and the holidays and bills#LOL im gonna make myself cry#honestly ill be fine but#i will have time so im wondering#anywayyyyyy i thought i wrote up a commissions sheet a while back but i can't find it#ANNOYING#anyway#sorry ig i just needed to rant#i hate ranting i hate talking abt myself i hate everything right now truly but like#everyone else posts all their random thoughts 24/7 all the time so#i should just let myself scream#and take the fat L#this is /srs tho would it be weird LOOOL#caitie blabs#caitie rants
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#the radio spins…the spotify playlisting i just wish hybe would keep the energy same for each member release#they’re so biased and they don’t even try to hide it#it sucks because all of them deserve the same exposure#idk when ill stop being mad about jitb’s promotions lol its been an entire year one would think id stop being so petty now but i just cannot#bring myself to stop#honestly admire hobi sm for pulling everything off on his own#from the concept to the costumes he was involved in everything#he apparently also paid for all the expenses of the jitb party himself :/ i wish i could be at least 10% like him 😭 how does he get sm done#not only that but despite of being super nervous at lolla he still networked hard and got that jcole collab like……he truly doesn’t wait for#anyone to come and help him#it’s really hard being like that ;-; ill always be proud of him <3#but not everyone can be like him and i understand 💓 it’s just very unfair how jin was treated#he literally decided to enlist because he had become the center of a national controversy while his company continued to milk him and did#nothing to protect him from all the vicious hate that he was receiving#he deserved sm better…
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Honestly so crushed and tired because today was the fourth time out of five past work days I got - imo - inappropriately disproportionately chewed out by higher-ups about things that a) HARMED nobody but "only" caused inconvenience and b) were not even entirely within MY control and c) were 90% about failed communication from both ends instead of genuine neglect or even mistakes from my side??
I still like my work, but wow. Some people cam so absolutely go fuck themselves and step in a puddle of cold garbage juice in socks first thing in the morning for a while. Holy shit.
Also I know who, when the "offer" is up next time, will ABSOLUTELY tell the doctor "yes, you're right, sign my sick note for two full weeks instead of just one" rather than going "I gotta go back as soon as I can bear it because so many people are sick already".
ALSO I know who will step back a little on volunteering for inconvenient extra work such as making coffee or cleaning up or re-stocking materials from the annoying cabinet for the next few weeks at least. Find me chilling at a couch with the others k thx bye.
:)))
#some people can really just fuck themselves soooooo hard#but also it's useless to argue with higher ups that it's unfair to treat you like that lol#literally why are people such assholes#will be chilling at work some more and really stepping back on the extra effort for a bit#clean up yourselves if you want it#find me playing on my phone during downtime lol#soryuchan's personal issuss#ANGERY!!!#i honestly just hate how i can't stop my eyes from getting watery from stress in these moments#because it looks like I'm crying to get sympathy or just bc I'm being a brat or baby#but in truth it's just too much stress and also anger#i don't cry bc i am so tiny and pitiful and maybe cute. i cry because i hate you so much i can't contain it. lmao.#no honestly this bothers me but i can't control it when stress spills over a threshold l#argh
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ik i said i would only post silly goofy things but i was thinking and my dad took so many experiences from me that i will never get back it's astounding
#i've already talked abt it w my therapist tho so lol#but like he took so many things from me. him and his bf took so many hobbies from me took so many opportunities from me#i actually feel a grudge against him atp#like without him i could be playing the guitar by now. i could be playing basketball. i could be dancing ballet. i could be having a hobby#but i dont bcs he was always against it he stopped taking me from ballet classes like#he made fun of so many things i was interested in that i just. didn't do it and i honestly think that's kinda fucked up#i'm not saying i could not start doing any of these things now like i could do it perfectly!#but i just think it's a lil unfair that i didn't get to have any hobbies as a kid bcs of him#jo.txt#sometimes i feel bad for him but then i rmbr and .
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not to vent on main but i hate how the solution/only way to help most of my current problems is to just accept things. my brain simply cannot process how the fuck I'm supposed to do that like what active steps am i supposed to take in order to do it (my old therapist said mindfulness but that shit's physically painful when you've got sensory sensitivity so that's off the table). god is playing tricks on me yet again and i hate him for that
#it just goes against my logic and honestly my ethics to accept things the way they are. it's impossible#i know it's healthier and that it's like impossible to live without accepting certain things but man. i just can't do it#this is absolutely why I'm so miserable all the time lol but I'd rather die than accept unfairness. and god is the most unfair of all 🧐#(ok now I'm just being jokingly dramatic sorry) (or am i)#negative //#vent#ask to tag
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STRESS AAAH
#Is it the fact my holiday is almost over and I haven’t checked my enrolment or did my timetable#maybe#I just can’t make myself do it#for some reason it freaks me out bfjeksak#anyways kaveh updates i now have 64 wishes spent on the banners this phase and nothing#honestly even if he comes home next wish I think I’m just so frustrated with everything I’ll just bench him I’m actually so mad this is#genuinely so unfair#first banner nothing#that banner I was heavily depressed and navigating myself through bad aftermath so I barely had the energy nor comprehension skills to under#understand Genshin LOL but I tried 😭 then there’s this banner where I saved sm and nothing 😐#I think I’d rather not get him anymore cause wtf I don’t want cons#and ughhhh at least let me loose the fifty fifty to either keqing or dehya#dora daily#anyways back on topic I feel so uneasy 😭
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