#it’s hard to believe two months have passed since i last posted here

[drackolyte]

hiii

[wintrwinchestr]

an overture of indulgence (joel miller x f!reader oneshot) 18+

summary: it's been a long time since you've seen joel, and some things have changed, but a lot has stayed the same. namely, how quickly he can still get you on his knees for him, ready to show him exactly just how much you like what has changed about him.

warnings: 18+, smut, post-outbreak, jackson joel, d/s relationship dynamics, pet names (baby, babygirl, sweetheart, sweet girl, etc), body worship, belly kink, talk of weight gain, belly riding, m/f masturbation, lil bit of humiliation kink, lil bit of edging, reader is an adult but age otherwise unspecified, reader is shorter than joel and has hair long enough to grab, let me know if i missed anything :)

word count: 4.3k

a/n: just fuckin outing myself left and right these days huh. idk what came over me with this one. started this late last night and here it is now. belly enjoyers rise!!!!!!! nice comments/reblogs appreciated if you enjoyed <3 you can't kink shame me bc i like getting bullied so now what. also i avoided daddy kink for once in my life please clap. i know i’m spoiling y’all this weekend don’t get used to it.

divider by @saradika

“...Joel?!” you shout, your leisurely walking pace quickly turning into a hurried jog as you leave Tommy behind, making a beeline toward the man you would swear on your life is Joel Miller. A small handful of years ago now, he was kind of your boyfriend, kind of not, kind of something else more complicated and unlabeled, because who can afford to put a label on anything in times like these?

Joel’s head turns in your direction at the sound of his name, and as soon as you spot that crooked scar across the bridge of his nose, you’re certain it’s him.

“Holy shit, I can’t believe it,” you half-cry, throwing your weight into him as you wrap him in a tight embrace. He’s much taller than you, but you still managed to knock him off his balance a little. He envelops your whole body in one of his signature, all-encompassing hugs, and it’s like no time has passed at all.

The two of you had ended whatever it was you had on good terms, no hard feelings or animosity shared between you. It was just hard to maintain any kind of relationship in a world like this, and trying to nurture romance in the Boston QZ was much like trying to grow a rose garden in toxic, radioactive soil. You can put as much care and effort and something like love into it as you have in you, but the circumstances will just never allow it to reach its full potential. The end of your “relationship” was mutual, but that didn’t mean it didn’t hurt. Especially when he had disappeared one day without so much as saying goodbye.

When you had stumbled upon Tommy and a group of patrollers in the snowy forest outside Jackson just earlier today, you were alone, tired, and losing hope that this rumored safe haven even existed at all. You had heard crackles through the radio in the QZ about the community, and even though it sounded too good to be true, what else did you have to lose anymore? After months of travel and survival and pain and hunger, you’d never been so happy to meet a bunch of strangers in the woods in your whole life. You didn’t hesitate to get on the back of Tommy’s horse, and let him lead you to the sanctuary they spoke of.

As he was giving you a tour, proudly showing off their electricity, running water, fresh food, and clean houses, you had started to look forward to what the future may bring, for the first time in a long time. You could never have imagined you’d ever run into Joel again, that this is where he had ended up, of all places. And now here the both of you are, bodies pressed as tightly together as possible, breathing in each other’s familiar scents and never wanting to let go again.

Joel is the first to break the embrace, grasping your head in his large hands and frantically searching your face for any sign that he could be dreaming, that fate hasn’t really brought you back together again after all.

“Jesus Christ, it’s really you,” he breathes, and you swear his voice breaks just a little bit as he presses his lips to your forehead, closing his eyes as he does.

When he blinks them open again, he meets Tommy’s gaze, who’s standing quietly a few yards back from where you’re having your sentimental reunion. Tommy gives an understanding nod, and gestures that he’ll be waiting inside the community’s dining hall, gathering that whatever this is happening between his brother and some girl he only just met, he shouldn’t interrupt. Joel is grateful for many things today, one of them being the rekindled bond he has with Tommy, the other being how you somehow miraculously found your way back to him.

Small groups of other Jackson residents follow Tommy into the dining hall shortly afterward, and as the sun begins to set behind the mountains, Joel realizes it must be about time for dinner to be served.

He detaches his lips from your forehead, brushing some of your hair away from your face as he takes you in again. “You poor thing, must be starvin’ I bet,” he wonders aloud, giving you a sympathetic look.

“Kinda always am, just as a rule, but yeah,” you reply, trying to make light of your situation. Though, Joel doesn’t seem to find the humor in it the way you do.

“Long as you stay here, ain’t ever gotta worry about that again, that’s for damn sure.” He runs his tongue across his lips as he finishes his sentence, already knowing that whatever meal they’re serving tonight, it’ll be some of the most delicious food he’s had in a long time. He suspects you’ll feel much the same. “C’mon, let’s get you inside. Get you warm and fed for once in your life.”

–

Your heart, your stomach, your soul, all feel full as you relax into the comfortable couch in the living room of Joel’s cozy home. He wouldn’t even entertain the idea of you staying in an empty house all by yourself tonight, insisting that if you’d like some company while you settle in, you were more than welcome to his. He had let you spend as long as you wanted to in his shower, and he didn’t mind if there was hardly any warm water left by the time you were done. He sure as hell wasn’t paying the bill, and you deserved to feel truly clean. He can remember clear as day how he felt after his first Jackson shower, like he had stripped off a layer of grime he hadn’t been able to scrub all the way clean in twenty years. He had gone to Maria to get you some clothes and underwear while you were bathing, and set them silently on the sink counter for you to put on whenever you were done.

And now here you sit, feeling full and clean and satisfied and comfortable and safe, watching Joel stoke the logs in his fireplace as it casts the whole room in a honey orange glow. You take a moment to admire him while he isn’t looking, and even in the dim and flickering lighting, you can see he’s just as handsome as he was the last time you saw him. He looks older, with more gray in his longer hair and meat on his bones, the latter trait likely due to years worth of the hearty cooking you both indulged in tonight. He looks… good like this.

“It really is nice to see you again, you know. You look…” you start, not being able to help the way your eyes wander to his soft lower belly, the way it pushes taut against his tucked-in flannel shirt and just barely spills over the edge of his jeans.

He turns his head away from the fire to face you. You’re not very subtle in your staring, and he knows what you’re referring to right away. He huffs a light chuckle, trying to brush off the way he thinks you’re poking fun at him.

“I know, I know,” he acknowledges, placing a hand on his stomach. “Been tryin’ to get Maria to give me some more patrol shifts, see if I can get some of the weight off. But hey, you try havin’ three square meals a day for the first time in twenty some odd years, see what it does to you, huh?” He pivots his attention back to the fireplace, and he seems to turn his body further away from you on purpose, so that you can’t see the round profile of his tummy as much.

“No! No, it, um… It suits you. I was gonna say you look good, actually.” You’re quick in your reply, trying to make it clear that you didn’t mean to offend him, without letting too much on. 

He scoffs. “C’mon, you don’t gotta flatter me, sweetheart. I know I don’t exactly look the way you remember–”

“Joel, will you stop?” you interrupt, your voice laced with exasperation. “I’m being serious. Do I look like I’m making fun of you?”

He cranes his neck to look back at where you’re perched on the couch, and gives you a once over. “Guess not… Look a lil’ like somethin’ else, though, if I'm bein’ honest,” he says with a teasing smirk. And there he is again, the same quick-witted Joel you remember from back in the QZ.

You choose to engage in his banter, just to see where he’s going with it. “Oh yeah? And what’s that?”

He shrugs, beginning to mindlessly poke at the firewood again. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you look like you might like it.”

He’s just kidding around with you, trying to rile you up, you’re sure. But when he gets silence in return instead of the sound of you jumping to defend yourself with another playful jab, he turns to face you once more, and is met with your stunned expression. 

“Oh…” Joel looks down at himself, then back to you again, just in time to catch your eyes flitting from his middle back up to his face. “What, you like ‘em big, sweetheart? ‘S that it?”

The truth is, you do, you always have. It was never a requirement, of course, as the guys you’d been with before Joel all had varying body types. But you’d be lying to yourself if you said that your eyes didn’t linger just a bit longer on guys with a little more to them, with wider arms and thicker legs and a softer middle. You’ve never admitted your preference to anyone before, and Joel calling you out on it now has your face running hot, skin feeling prickly as he sees through you like you’re made of glass.

“I-I don’t– I mean, I do, kinda, but not like that… Well, it is like that, I just mean–” You stumble over yourself, fearing you’ve revealed too much, wishing you could rewind the conversation and just tell him it was nice to see him again, plain and simple.

Joel lays the fire poker down on the granite ledge of the fireplace, approaching where you’re sitting and cupping the side of your face with his calloused hand. 

“Sh, sh, stop, baby. ‘S alright if you do, nothin’ to be ashamed of,” he comforts, and it takes all the willpower you have left not to let your eyes drift down to his stomach, so close you could kiss it, if he’d let you.

“It’s just… I missed you. I thought about you all the time, wondered what ever happened to you after you left. Didn’t even know if you were alive until today. I’m just happy to see you… doing so well. To see that you’re healthy, and everything.” You swallow hard, hoping you sound convincing enough that he’ll let this go, forget all about your little admission just now. But of course, Joel is as stubborn as he’s ever been, and he doesn’t plan on releasing you from his trap now that you’re ensnared in it. 

“That’s sweet, baby, ‘s real sweet,” Joel says, softly, stroking his thumb across your cheekbone as he speaks. “Thought about you too, all this time. Practically every day…” He rakes his eyes over you, noticing the way his touch has you starting to melt already, how you’re looking up at him with your wide, needy eyes. “Why don’t you show me just how much you missed me, hm? How much you love seein’ me healthy, as you put it.”

You’re stunned into silence once again, jaw slack and pupils wide as you search his gaze for proof that he’s just messing with you, making fun of you just to watch you squirm. But you don’t find any.

“O-okay,” you agree in a half-whisper.

Joel smiles down at you, satisfied. “All these years later, still just the sweetest thing, ain’t you? You still just as obedient, too?”

You nod without even thinking, words catching up with your instinctual response a second later. “Mhm, yeah, I am…” You had forgotten how easy it is to submit to him, how good it feels to let the hypnotizing tone of his voice carry you somewhere far away from yourself, when you need it the most. Whether it was after a shitty day of working for shittier rations in the QZ, or after a harsh trek in harsher weather to a forested oasis, Joel always knows how to make you feel like submission is your most natural state. 

“Good… Kneel for me please, sweetheart,” he commands, and you obey immediately, his hand slipping from your face as you slide from the couch onto the woven carpet beneath you. Like second nature, your hands automatically fold themselves on your lap, remembering how you were never to touch Joel until he permitted you to. He takes note of this, and praises you accordingly. “Look at that, didn’t even have to ask. Such a good girl.”

He’s so enamored with you, he almost forgets where he was going with this until he watches your eyes flash to the growing bulge in his jeans, then back up to him. “Not tonight, sweetheart. Was thinkin’ you could put that pretty mouth to use on somethin’ different this time, hm?”

You knit your brows together, not sure what he means, but he doesn’t let you wonder for long. Slowly, he starts to unbutton his flannel shirt, starting at the top and working his way down. He tosses it onto the ground, then pulls his undershirt off over his head, adding it to the other discarded clothing. Without the confines of his slightly-too-tight button-up, you can see how much he really has filled out. Everything about his upper body is just a little more plush, with petal pink stretch marks adorning the soft skin in various places. You want to make it your personal mission to kiss each and every one of them, commit their exact coordinates on his body to memory.

There's a deep scar, you notice, to the left of his belly button, that has almost successfully disguised itself as one of those pretty marks. It’s definitely new since you saw him last, and it looks like it hurt, especially with the evidence of how crudely it had been stitched back together.

“What happened?” you wonder aloud, worried eyes glued to the healed injury.

He has to peer over the curve of his belly to see what you’re looking at. “Long story. Happened on my way out here, after I left Boston. Nothin’ for you to worry about, sweet girl, hardly even hurt. Forget it’s even there, most of the time,” he answers, still with a dominant edge to his voice that does a mostly good job of convincing you it’s the truth.

“Can… Can I?” you ask, waiting to receive his permission before you move your hands from your lap. 

“Yeah, baby, go ahead,” Joel allows. 

You reach out a small hand to gently trace over the raised scar, then press your lips to it with your hands splayed out on either side of your head, just barely pressing into his belly. He releases a soft groan, cradling the back of your head with one of his hands, applying the lightest amount of pressure to let you know this is where he wants to keep you. 

“Why don’t you keep goin’, sweetheart? Gimme some more lovin’ like that, know you wanna,” he encourages, and you think you get the idea now, what it is he wanted to put your pretty mouth to use for.

With his explicit permission to continue, you don’t need telling twice. You move your face to hover just in front of his belly button, admiring the dense salt and pepper happy trail that sprouts from where his jeans push into his soft skin. You drag your tongue along the hair, nipping at the soft curve of where it disappears into the divot in his stomach. He makes a noise in response, half pained and half pleasured, but he doesn’t stop you. Just for good measure, you place a kiss to the little blushing mark where your teeth had scraped him.

Almost of their own volition, it seems, your hands begin to knead at his stomach as you make good on your promise to yourself to kiss every single one of his stretch marks. You allow your tongue to dart from your mouth on the last one, and Joel sucks in a breath.

“Oh, fuck. Forgot how good that wet lil’ mouth feels on me, sweetheart. Keep goin’,” he says, voice coming out strained. His fingers curl tightly into your hair, and he begins to maneuver your face around his belly. You lave your tongue over his skin as he does, slicking him with wet, sloppy kisses. “Yeah, baby, you fuckin’ worship it, show me how much you like me like this.”

It’s a little humiliating, but just enough that you like the feeling. You’re breathing hard and fast, letting out little whimpers as your fluttering cunt begins to soak your underwear. He brings your face to a stop at the most tantalizing part of him, the part that truly evidences how much more he’s allowed himself to indulge since settling in Jackson. The ample curve of flesh that just barely conceals the waistband of his jeans, the part you’ve wanted to get your mouth on since you first saw how it strained the lower buttons of his shirt. You latch onto it, massaging the skin around it as you use your teeth and tongue to suck a mark into him.

A growl rumbles from deep in his chest, and he curses under his breath. “Like it that much, huh? Fuck, naughty thing, look at you.”

You’re so fucking turned on, you’re shivering, rocking where you kneel and squeezing your thighs together in an attempt to get some kind of relief. You let one of your hands drift to the hard shape in Joel’s jeans, and it seems he’s enjoying this as much as you are. He spots your pathetic little squirms as you rut against nothing, and then he’s using his grip on your hair to pull you up from the floor.

“Got an idea. Up,” he commands roughly, and you detach your lips from his belly to obey his order. “Get these off, there we go.” He pulls down your sweatpants and underwear, helping you step out of them. “Christ, you’re soaked,” Joel teases, eyeing the sizable wet spot in your panties as he tosses them aside to join the other forgotten clothing. He reaches a hand toward the apex of your thighs, teasing your wet pussy and gathering some of your slick on two of his fingers. You let out a tiny yelp, but let him play with you, and then he’s bringing his fingers in front of his face and examining the sticky strings of your arousal when he spreads them apart. “All this just from lettin’ you worship all this, huh?” he taunts, patting his stomach once for emphasis. “Who’d’ve thought? Not that I’m complainin’...”

He quickly rids himself of his jeans and briefs, then reclines onto the couch with a quiet groan, stretching out his body along the length of it. Your mouth waters at the sight of his cock, hard and leaking as it bobs against his belly, his precum adding to the dampness still there from your tongue. “Come sit, sweetheart,” Joel says, softly, motioning with both of his hands for you to come closer.

You grip a hand onto the backrest of the couch to balance yourself while you move to straddle him, prepared to sink down onto his length for the first time in way too fucking long. “Uh uh, not there, baby,” he instructs, smirking when he sees how you hesitate in confusion. “Take a seat right here for me.” Again, he pats that most tempting area of his lower belly, and you just about fall apart at the sight of how his flesh ripples in the wake of it.

“Yeah, there you go, good girl,” he praises, both hands gripping your waist as he helps you settle your weight onto his soft abdomen.

“I dunno, don’t wanna hurt you–” you start, but he cuts you off swiftly.

“You won’t, baby. I’m a big man, ain’t I?” he teases, flashing you a devilish and knowing smile. “Go on, sweetheart, ride it.”

You inhale a shuddering breath, then place both of your hands on his shoulders to hold yourself up. You start an experimental buck into his belly, and that trail of dark hair tickles your clit so perfectly. It takes a few tries for you to get the positioning and pressure just right, and then you’re truly riding him, using his full stomach to get yourself off while he watches. 

“God, that’s good. Use it, baby. You love me bigger, love that I’ve been eatin’ so good, prove it to me, c’mon,” Joel goads, and it spurs you on to grind against him harder, faster, as incoherent mumbles and curses tumble from your lips.

“Love it, Joel, you look so good, fuck. So fucking–mmh–so big, makes me so… so–”

“I know it does, sweet girl, I know. Makes you fuckin’ soaked is what it does, god damn. You gonna get my belly all messy, hm? Gonna rub your lil’ cunt all over it, get me all fuckin’ wet?”

“Uh huh, yeah, gonna… I’m gonna–” you whine, eyes shutting tight as your hips pick up their pace. You move your hands from his shoulders to place them on his stomach instead, grabbing at handfuls of his tummy in an effort to create something more solid to rub yourself against. 

You’re already embarrassingly close, the humiliating edge to your earlier worship having gotten you most of the way there on its own. So swollen and sensitive it almost hurts, you won’t need much more to reach your high.

“Not without me, you ain’t. Gonna be right there with ya. You remember how we used to do it?” Joel asks, as if you could ever forget. He’s referring to your many late nights, early mornings, in his bed or in a back alley or wherever in the QZ, where he liked to make sure you both finished at the same time. You’d always be the first one to reach the edge, because he’d focus all his attention on getting you there before him, just to make you wait. It was never something punishing, just something he liked to do as an extra bit of control and dominance, and he knew it always made your orgasms that much more powerful and satisfying when he would finally permit you to let go.

With your eyes closed, so focused on your own pleasure, you hadn’t noticed that he had reached behind you to start fisting his cock some time ago. But you can hear it now, the wet schlick of his hand moving up and down his shaft as he works himself. “Hold it for me, sweetheart, I know you can. Keep rubbin’ your pretty pussy against me, jus’ like that, almost there…”

You mewl, screwing your face up as you force yourself to slow down your thrusts, muscles tense as you try to keep your orgasm at bay for as long as you can. 

Thankfully, he must be worked up enough from seeing you fall apart for him so easily for the first time in so long, that his permission comes just a few minutes later.

“Come for me, babygirl, soak my fuckin’ belly, c’mon,” Joel growls, and you fall forward immediately, twitching and spasming and crying out into the soft muscle of his shoulder as you ride out the shuddering shocks of your orgasm. He groans next to your ear as he comes, and you can feel the warm ropes of his own release as some of them land on your lower back. You’re both wet, heaving messes, as you embrace each other for the second time today and work on catching your breath.

So exhausted from the day you had, you must’ve fallen asleep against his chest as you laid there, because then you’re being woken up by the dull scratch of his fingertips against your scalp and his familiar voice working its way through the thick fog that clouds your tired brain. 

“You alright, baby?” he asks, and you can hear that he’s smiling, amused at this sleepy little thing he’s got clinging to him.

“Mhm, jus’ tired,” you answer, a barely-there mumble of a sentence.

“I’ll bet… You wanna get cleaned up? Get all tucked into bed?”

You shake your head against his neck, and he chuckles.

“No? Whatcha wanna do then, hm?”

“Jus’ lay here. Missed you. Don’t wanna let… go…” 

Your sentence drifts off into silence before the temptation of sleep allows you to finish it, but Joel gets the idea. He smiles to himself, kissing the top of your head, and hugs you closer. Both of you are still sticky and damp, but satisfied. And together again. And that’s a hell of a lot better than the alternative.

So he agrees, and you stay like that for the rest of the night. Joel doesn’t worry about whether or not he remembered to set his alarm clock for his extra patrol shift the next morning, or if he’ll even hear it all the way from his bedroom upstairs, because it doesn’t matter anyway. He has you, and you made it very clear tonight just how much you like him exactly the way he is. 

Maybe, your rose garden can finally begin to bloom, now that the pair of you have somewhere safe and comfortable and healthy to try your hand at nurturing it again.

tag list: @beefrobeefcal @iamasaddie @rebel-held @dilfgestivo @zliteraturehoe @joeldjarin @kamcrazy123 @hellowoolf @rexamongthestars @stevie75 @luxurychristmaspudding @noisynightmarepoetry @mewantpeepaw @pedritoferg (if your name is crossed out, it won’t let me tag you!!)

[nnon0]

JJH fic recs

other fic rec posts : 1.(active post) 2.

been getting a little hard trying to find long fics to read these days but here are some that i complied in the last month or so :)

(🫀) -personal faves

all these years @domjaehyun

WC: 34.1k

fluff, smut, angst; childhood friends-to-lovers!au, college!au, neighbors!au

Just friends @lonelyharmonies

WC: 22k

Strangers-to-friends- to-lovers!au , college au

what happens when you wake up in someone else’s bed after getting drunk in a party?

(🫀) Only @ppangjae

WC: 21.6k

almost!lovers au

You like to believe crossing paths with Jaehyun after graduation is just pure coincidence. He always comes and goes. But what if he decides to stay? To stick around? To give what was an ‘almost’ a chance?

Romeo roulette @wincore

WC:21.1k

soulmate au, office au, fake dating

if finding your soulmate is the same as a damn game of Russian roulette, you are determined to not pull the trigger at all. except, you know who your soulmate is and he doesn’t—and given a choice to pretend, you find that jaehyun is the lesser of the two burdens to bear.

he fell first and he fell harder @taurusdaylight

WC: 18.7k

Basketball captain!jaehyun, childhood-friends-to-lovers

jeong jaehyun really loves basketball. but also, he’s terribly in love with his childhood best friend of seventeen years, you.

(🫀) all i wanted @yutaholic

WC: 17k

heartbreakers, smut

A year has passed since you last saw your best friend, Jaehyun, but the man who returns is not the boy you once knew and loved. Jaehyun will barely speak to you and you don’t know why, but you both may be exactly what the other needs to mend your broken hearts.

(🫀)The Apple of My Eye @sehunniepotwrites

WC: 17k

school! au , teacher!au , Kindergarten teacher!jaehyun

As a young and handsome kindergarten teacher of two years, Jeong Jaehyun was used to receiving presents during Teacher’s Appreciation Week. This, however, was the first year Jaehyun wanted to give a present of appreciation to someone else—his new and ever-so-lovable teacher’s assistant.

(🫀)song for a little sparrow @ppangjae

WC:13.7k

poet!jaehyun x painter!reader , strangers-to-lovers

As a burnt out painter, you packed one suitcase and flew a one-way trip to Paris in hopes of finding your passion again. In the city of love, the last thing you expected was to bump into a man who doesn’t believe in love. But you do, and you find yourself showing him the wonders of love and falling in love. Just don’t fall in love with him.

I like me better (when i’m with you) @tyonfs

WC:11.8k

friends to enemies to lovers, sports au , smut

there was no one else on the planet that made your blood boil like jeong jaehyun did. you never thought your feelings toward him were anything past pure hatred, but when you were lost in the feeling of his lips on yours and his hands on your body, you couldn’t help but think that maybe a part of you didn’t completely hate his guts. 

Someone to Bring Home @rouiyan

WC: 10.2k

Med student!jaehyun, College au, Brothers best friend , home for thanksgiving

synopsis — “if you’ve been waiting for fallin’ in love, babe, you don’t have to wait on me.” (sanctuary - joji)

Boyfriend material @mochidoie

WC: 6.2k

fake dating au, strangers-to-lovers , slight angst

Although you and Jaehyun had never spoken a word to each other before this class project, he asks you to be in a fake relationship in order to prove to his longtime crush that he is boyfriend material.

Back up Valentine @tyonfs

WC: 2.9k

Spiderman!jaehyun

you don’t have any unrealistic expectations for valentine’s day considering your love life has never flourished, but the least your best friend could’ve done was not summon an intergalactic army of an alien species during your first blind date ever.

SERIES

S.C.S; ayakashi @starlightkun

WC:66.2k

heavily based off yet another otome game, ayakashi: romance reborn ; bc of this, all the lore used in here is inspired by/based on/taken from the lore of the game, not the actual lore of traditional ayakashi/yokai stories

[destiny-aesthetics]

❗Long Rambling Incoming ❗

Disclaimer: Before this expansion I was by no means a regular player. Sometime I would have burst of playtime where I would jump on every week, other I would lose track of time and wouldn't touch it for months. I have also played this game since 2016. So ain't no New Light.

Might be the minority here but ...

I Hate how Episode: Revenant's story is being delivered.

So much time passes between Acts that I forget what happen during the first one, but somehow because it dropped all in the first day it also feels like things are progressing too fast.

It feels like, when it comes to story interactions, we capture Eramis and released her all in the same week instead of her being our custody for months.

The other episodes/seasons felt like our Guardian was active in the operations that the NPCs were doing, while this one it just feels like we're, ironically, just fetching things for NPCs.

Like we're waiting on our ship twiddling our thumbs until called on.

The "Fieldwork" also does not help in filling the story or the time. They are so short and easy that they become forgettable. Also does not help the audio was missing the first couple of weeks.

Onslaught also didn't do much for the story. I don't really feel like I'm saving Eliskni and the disjointed audio didn't help.

I get some players felt like they HAD to come back every week or wasn't patient enough to wait a week but this ain't it.

Best solution maybe ...

If this was a TV series with (15) 1-hour episodes, per season, give players the first (5) 1-hour episodes INSTEAD of (1) 1-hour long episode and (4) 10-minute long minisodes.

Players still get to finish whenever they want but it also has a good play time.

I shouldn't be finish with this Act in only 2 hours THEN have to wait 76 DAYS for more story.

AND most of that 2-hour run time was not even story. It is me going into the episode activity and then getting more dialogue afterwards.

And again, I believe I touch on this in previous post.

IT WAS NOT MANDATORY TO PLAY THE WEEKLY STORY MISSIONS.

You could have just as easily played everything else in Destiny 2 then jumped on the last week of the season, and played through the season story.

You didn't even have to do the story to get the season activities unlocked. AND they stopped locking previous season things after the new one began so realistically you could have completed them all before the next expansion.

No one has explain to me a good answer on WHY weekly missions were so hard for players and "I didn't want to have to jump on every week" or "I don't want a weekly story mission" is not a good answer when the options above were available.

Destiny 2 need something because there's a triangle of players, Casuals, No Lifers and Content creators, and when it good for two points it sucks for the last one.

Casuals are going to have to learn that they are going to miss out on things just because they don't play enough.

No lifers are going to have to learn that they're going to run out things to do because they do it all in a the first week or couple weeks.

Content Creators are going to have to learn to be entertaining without the game feeding constant steam of content or something now being easy because they made a boss melting build

........................

This post is already too long, so Destiny rambling part 2?

[aliceintheworld]

PURE ATTRACTION | JJK | TATTOO ARTIST

Pairing: TattooArtistJungkook X NaiveReader

Summary: " I shouldn’t be watching a man undressing, especially not from the house next door."

Warning: Fluff, kiss, impure thoughts, conversation about sex, masturbation, doubts and more doubts.

A/N: Here I am. As a thank you for all the wonderful comments, I will post two chapters today. (To be honest, I already have some stories in mind, but I want to finish Pure Attraction first, so I need to do it a little bit faster.) Keep interacting and voting. Don't forget: VOTE! It brings engagement and more motivation for the author!

Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

Chapter 8

I wave to my mother inside the car, as she reverses in front of our house and leaves, driving down the street of our neighborhood. Eunji works at a medium-sized company and travels a lot for a few months of the year, when she needs to present a new project. It's not new to me. I am used to being alone for some days; what makes me think, however, is Jungkook. I look at my neighbors' house out of inertia, seeing him at the living room window, reading some book. He notices me, opens a mischievous little smile, and waves, winking. My cheeks burn with his attention, and before I can embarrassed myself, in any way, I close the door and quickly step inside.

I still can't believe what happened last night. It feels like an unreal dream. If I didn't have marks and hickeys on my neck and breasts, I would have accepted that it was all a figment of my imagination and that Jungkook and I didn't end up together. I feel scared because I don't regret it and want it to happen again. I don't know where I'm getting myself into, and each time we meet, I sink deeper and deeper into this situation. I feel apprehensive because what I feel for him, I've never felt for anyone else. His kiss when he said goodbye, his dark and big eyes on mine... Just remembering it makes me shiver.

I start to organize myself because I need to take a look at the thrift store. It's been a while since I last went there, and I don't know how is doing. My day goes by quickly, and I return a bit earlier than expected because the movement wasn't very good. I attended to three customers, and only two of them bought something. I climb the stairs at home, tired and hungry, my stomach growling because I didn't even have lunch. I throw myself on the bed and close my eyes, not caring about the heavy clothes I'm wearing. I could sleep even in a costume, that nothing would disturb my sleep. I take off my sneakers with my feet and sigh, relieved to be home.

A few minutes pass when I feel fingers on my thigh, lifting my denim skirt towards my intimacy. I jump up, startled, when I see Jungkook on his knees on my mattress, his face close to mine. He laughs, noticing my surprise, doesn't say a word, and simply kisses me, brushing his lips against mine. I savor his taste in my mouth, silently asking him to deepen the caress and use his tongue with mine; however he pulls away, gives me a peck and another, before standing up completely.

"I could call the police." I joke, brushing the short hair from his face. The haircut is not much different from the previous one, but it makes him look more handsome, if that's even possible.

"I do everything with consent." He mocks, lying down beside me.

"I didn't give you any consent to come into my room. How did you get in?"

"The open window was very inviting. I couldn't resist." He shrugs, smiling.

"Why did you come here?" I raise my head, focused on his rosy lip when he pouts.

"I came to get you." Jungkook says, stretching on the bed. He lifts my right leg, caressing my skin. "And that's not a request."

"I don't even know where you want to take me." I comment, swallowing hard. I laugh a little, feeling the tickles from the tips of his fingers. "And I'm tired. I worked at my mother's store and at the library. And today is Tuesday. I'm dead."

"Your mother went traveling, didn't she? Enjoy it while she's not home."

"How do you know she traveled?" I raise an eyebrow, curious.

"She told my mom some time ago." He shrugs, as if it's simple.

"She only told me last night." I growl, irritated. My mother always does this, telling me her plans always at the last minute.

"I thought you knew. That's why I came here. When the king is in the castle, one cannot court the Princess. Everyone knows that."

"In this case, I would be the Princess?" I laugh, finding it funny.

"Yes. You are definitely Rapunzel. Have you noticed that your life is literally living in a tower?"

"I'm touched."

"It's serious. Come with me." Jungkook asks, whispering, squeezing my thigh. I smile knowing that, the way he asks, I'll never be able to say no. I sigh and roll my eyes.

"You convinced me. Tell me where we're going."

"It's not a very surprising place." He speaks carelessly; suddenly, his cheeks turn red, and he pinches the lobe of his ear, embarrassed. That makes me even more curious. I wonder what he plans, and even though I'm tired, I nod and get up from the bed.

"Alright, you made me curious. But I'm hungry and need to eat something before we go." I say, wrapping my arms around his neck. I kiss his lips in a quick peck, tasting him. A voice in my head tells me I shouldn't act so affectionately because I'm not his girlfriend –or anything like that –but the way Jungkook responds quiets that voice and reassures me it's ok to touch him like this.

"I'll order something for you to eat." He smiles simply. Before I can argue, he crouches down, takes my foot, and pulls off my sneaker. I watch everything, worried and fascinated, relaxing my leg so he can finish the task.

I really like Jungkook. I've admitted that, and it's not very hard to notice. I did things with him because he makes me feel confident in my own skin, and that does me good. He is funny, talented, kind and sarcastic, and even though I don't know him well, the things I know about him make me admire him. The problem is he might still love his ex, and I don't know how far I can unleash my own feelings. I'm afraid of having too many expectations and ending up frustrated and disappointed. He treats me very well, but does that mean he reciprocates what I feel, or does it just mean he is a gentleman who knows how to take care of a woman?

"Done." He says, finishing the knot of my shoelace.

I smile at him gratefully and feel his hand holding mine as we walk down the stairs. I lose a bit of my smile, seeing our fingers intertwined, but I say nothing. I promise myself that I will enjoy the moment and keep my paranoia to myself, for now.

"Are you really not going to tell me where we're going?" I ask when we reach the sidewalk. He shakes his head and laughs before stepping away.

"No. You'll have to wait a little." He replies, opening the gate to his parents' garage. I stand still, waiting for his car when I'm surprised to see Jungkook on a motorcycle, with another helmet on his right arm. I open my mouth, totally impressed, looking from end to end at how huge the thing is. Now I understand why Mr. Jeon was worried, when he mentioned his son's mean of transportation, last night at dinner.

"Shall we?"

"I've never been on a motorcycle." I comment weakly, afraid of falling before I even get on the back.

"Everything has a first time." Jungkook bites his lower lip, watching me mischievously. My face heats up when I remember he said the same thing to me, when I sucked his dick in my room.

"Jungkook, how long have you been riding this thing? Did you pass your practical test on the first try?" I ask, sarcastically. He laughs, rolling his eyes.

"I promise you will come out alive from this." He guarantees with cynicism. He stands up, turns around, and goes behind me. "I'll tie your hair up, wait a bit."

I wait patiently while he holds my rebellious strands and ties them with some elastic. Jungkook takes the helmet from his arm and looks back at my face. He seems super focused and serious, furrowing his brows and making sure my head is indeed protected. He gives a little smile and sits on the motorcycle, waiting for my turn. I am a bit awkward, not quite sure where to support myself, but Jungkook doesn't mind and holds my leg so I can settle in securely. I wrap my arms around his waist, and with my heart racing, I wave between his shoulder and neck.

"We can go." I confirm, uncertain. Almost at the same moment, Jungkook revs the engine and takes off down the street at speed. I hold on tighter to him, tense. I hear his laugh and know he did this on purpose to tease me. I hit his arm, pouting, and sigh, feeling the nice end-of-day breeze.

It's scary, fascinating and a fantastic moment. With the motorcycle rolling, I can follow the sunset, which transforms the blue sky into orange and the usually polluted air, into something purer and cleaner. It's a feeling of freedom, enjoyable and terrifying, the same I have every time I'm with Jungkook. I hold on tighter, happy for the new experience I'm living.

It doesn't take long before the motorcycle stops in the city center. Things are quite busy, with people walking from one place to another and the stores bustling with customers. I can't remember the last time I came here, even though it's so close to my house. I get off awkwardly, and Jungkook follows right behind, taking off his helmet.

"It's here." He smiles happily, pointing behind me. When I turn around, there's a large sign saying "GOLDEN TATTOO" with Jungkook's name, on a seemingly new and well-lit wall. "I managed to finish the renovation today, and I wanted to bring you here to see the place. You'll be the first person to come."

"It's perfect!" I sight, impressed. I'm left speechless as he opens the bulletproof glass and enters the place, as if he were familiar with the environment. It's different from what I expected, with gray-painted walls, plants everywhere, and illustrated designs in large frames. It's a place I would feel comfortable in, even if I came alone. "Did you decorate it?"

"Yes. These last few days, I worked with a design team to organize everything the way I envisioned it. It took a lot of work, but I think it's finally all ready."

"It's very beautiful." I smile, touching one of the frames on the wall. It's a tattoo of an eye, apparently feminine and brown. It's so realistic that it feels like it's looking in my direction. I analyze the drawing so much that Jungkook laughs, lowering his head.

"Did you like it?" He points to the frame, smiling. I nod, touching the picture.

"It's spectacular."

"I drew it." He explains, coming up behind me. My heart skips a few beats when his arms wrap around my waist, and he presses his mouth against my ear. My spine freezes, and I get all goosebumps, from the last strand of my hair to the tips of my toes. "Come here, I want to show you something."

He pulls my hand and guides me to a room with white walls, some utensils and machines that, even as a layperson, I know are for tattooing. It's a very clean and sterilized place, with masks, disposable gloves, and colored inks in a glass and wood cabinet. The almost obsessive organization doesn't surprise me. When I saw Jungkook's apartment some time ago, I realized he likes everything very well organized, and his workplace wouldn't be any different. He sits me on the waiting sofa, and I observe some drawings in a black folder on the coffee table.

I don't know many people with tattoos, and I've never taken the time to appreciate this type of art, but I like what Jungkook does. He creates realistic designs, but most of them have fine and delicate touches. It's interesting to get to know another one of his sides that makes me more enchanted by him every day. I glance at my phone, thinking of my mother suddenly. I shake my head, determined to expel my restlessness. All these worries don't matter right now. She's out of town, and I need to stop tormenting myself about her. Jungkook appears at the door, almost as if he knew I was lost in thought, and smiles at me, mysteriously.

"What do you want to show me? I'm almost going crazy with curiosity." I confess, excited. He smiles, holding a roll of plastic wrap in one hand and raising a tablet in the other.

"I'm going to end your curiosity now." He says. "It's nothing special. I'm just going to do a tattoo on myself."

"What? Another one? Didn't you do one the day before yesterday?" I exclaim, opening my mouth in disbelief. He laughs at my surprise, as if he had said the most ordinary thing in the world.

"I've done tattoos on myself a few times; it's not a big deal. And I have to take advantage because the healing time is always restrict with food."

"Don't you feel pain while doing it?"

"I do." He confirms, shrugging. "But it's not unbearable, and I can stay still the whole time."

"Are you some kind of masochist?" I tease, watching him. Jungkook wraps the plastic around the tattoo machine and on the bench beside me without pausing.

"It's a nice pain." He smiles slyly, licking his lower lip. "It's almost like when I spank your butt. Don't you feel pleasure when there's a bit of it?"

"Jungkook!" I reprimand, my face burning with embarrassment at the question. He really has no scruples. And neither do I, because I hate to admit it, but I actually enjoy it when he spanks me.

"Some types of pain are bearable and nice to feel. You should try it." He suggests, sitting beside me.

"No, thanks." I decline. Just the thought of a needle piercing me, makes me anxious.

"Scaredy-cat." He mocks. He raises the tablet and shows me the drawing. It's a pink, reddish flower. It's a beautiful and interesting drawing, but apparently painful if done by oneself. I grimace, pitying him.

"What does it mean?" His face turns red suddenly. He looks at his hands and bites his lips, thoughtful.

"It's the flower of my birth. The tiger flower." He diverts his gaze from mine, leaving me confused.

"What is it?" I ask, laughing. Generally, I'm the shy one in the relationship.

"It's nothing; it's just that... it means 'please, love me.' I think that phrase is so beautiful and, at the same time, so sad."

"Please, love me." I repeat, testing the words on my tongue. It really is sad but touching. I wonder, however, why he chose that tattoo. "Are you sure you can handle it?" I question, worried, somewhat skeptical. Jungkook turns completely to me and narrows his dark eyes, looking at me.

"Of course I can. Don't doubt my abilities."

"I'm not doubting." I explain, putting my hands in front of my body to defend myself. "It's just that it's a drawing with many details. It's normal for you not to be able to do something like that in a short time. It's already seven."

"Let's make a bet?" He suggests, brushing his hair from his face. I get excited about the proposal, nodding my head.

"Sure, why not? But what can we bet on?"

"If I can't finish the tattoo in two hours, you choose something for us to do together." The dark-haired boy explains, running his fingers on my thigh. A shiver runs up my spine as he trails his fingers on my skin, slowly lifting my skirt with ease.

"Do something together? Like what?" I frown, curious. He smiles, this time wickedly. His hand goes from my thighs to my neck, pulling my hair back. He entwines his fingers in my strands and caresses my scalp with his thumb. A breath of arousal escapes my mouth, beyond my control.

"Anything. You decide."

"And if you win the bet, you do whatever you want with me?" I tease, laughing at my own question. Jungkook doesn't deny it, however, looking at me with a serious expression that, if it weren't for the situation, would disturb me.

"I already know what I want." He says in a husky voice. "If I win the bet, you touch yourself in front of me, like I asked you to."

"J-Jungkook! I can't do that." I choke, shaking my head. I would die of embarrassment. I've tried a few times to touch myself, I confess, but I never succeeded. I always felt awkward, as if something was missing. As if I were a complete weirdo for even trying.

"Are you already thinking about losing? That's not how bets work."

"I've never bet on something like this." I laugh ironically, trembling. His hand releases my hair but doesn't stop touching me. He slides his palm further down and caresses my stomach, which bubbles because of him. I'm so entranced by his touch that I can't stop him and let Jungkook slip under my shirt, heading for my breasts, covered by my bra.

"Think of the other side. If I lose, you can do whatever you want with me." He argues quietly, giving a small smile.

I start imagining what I would do with him if I won the bet. I'm not very creative, but something that really excites me would be to bring him to the edge just like he did with me last night. He denied my orgasm, and I want to do the same with Jungkook, over and over again. Of course, I would have to be very confident, and I don't know if I could achieve my goal, but I think it's worth a try.

"Alright. I agree." I nod nervously. He approaches with a sideways smile and tucks my hair behind my ear, before closing his eyes and kissing my mouth.

I wrap my arms around his neck and deepen our kiss, massaging his mouth with mine. I bite his lower lip, only satisfied when I hear a rumble from him deep in his throat. He smirks between caresses, stops, and attacks my neck, licking my skin and leaving a thin trail of saliva. Weeks ago, I couldn't even imagine a man without clothes in front of me, and now all I want is to suck him off and feel him come in my mouth, just like last night. I still remember the result of his pleasure flowing down my throat, and my desire to repeat everything we did makes my brain intoxicated. I'm completely lost in wanting this man.

"A kiss to seal the deal." Jungkook grunts and pulls away, his mouth swollen. I try to continue the kiss with the excitement eating me from the inside out, but he smiles and stops touching me completely. "I have to start this tattoo if I want to win the bet."

Jungkook stands up and sketches the rose on a piece of paper. My head disconnects from reality while he begins the work. I pick up my phone for a few seconds and see the time passing. I would be more worried if my mother weren't out of town. I leave the sofa, needing to pee, and open a door marked for the bathroom. I take care of my business and look at myself in the mirror. My face looks apparently normal, if not for my flushed cheeks and red lips from the kisses. I splash a bit of water on myself, and when I feel calmer, I return to the tattoo studio. The machine works continuously, and Jungkook seems submerged and engrossed in his task, furrowing his brows, totally focused.

I shouldn't have accepted this bet. Jungkook has several tattoos, and it's obvious that his pain tolerance is high. I know he will win. The way he remains silent and effortlessly pierces his own skin tells me that sooner or later, I'll have to fulfill the difficult challenge. I bite my lip, watching the drawing of the flower being completed as the minutes pass. It's a very time-consuming process, but minutes fly. I am so relaxed and still that I could almost fall asleep listening to the buzzing of the needle.

"Y/N, I ordered food for both of us." I hear his voice suddenly. I jump a bit because I didn't notice he was talking to me, lost in my own head. "I hope you like pasta."

"I really like it, thanks." I say, shaking my head. I'm really hungry.

Before long, someone rings the studio's doorbell. Jungkook even tries to get up to answer the delivery person, but there's no way I'd let him go outside when he's so focused on his own work. I go outside and grab the food bag, seeing that he ordered beer, pasta, fries, and a can of Diet Coke for both of us. I'm happy to notice, in such a simple gesture, that he remembered I don't drink alcohol. My mouth instantly fills with saliva.

"I think you're not going to win the bet." I comment, sitting back on the sofa. I separate my food from his, tasting the delicious vegetable sauce that is the most tasty thing in the world. At least that's what my stomach thinks, given how hungry I am.

"I'm almost done." He brags, still tattooing himself. He passes a paper to remove the excess ink from his skin and raises an eyebrow confidently. "I can't wait to see you touching yourself."

"That's not going to happen." I guarantee with a certainty I don't have, blushing and taking a sip of the soda. It's refreshing, going cold down through my throat.

"Let's see if it won't. Do you really think I'm going to miss the chance to watch you masturbating?"

"Jungkook..." I mumble, covering my face. "Don't you have any shame? Stop saying those things."

"Don't worry, Y/N." He smiles, confident in his victory. "You still have a reasonable amount of time to get used to the idea."

"Focus, Kook." I change the subject; my heart races just imagining myself in that situation. He falls silent and bites his lower lip, looking at me from head to toe with such hunger that makes me nervous and excited. I swallow my food as he returns to tattooing, wondering if he will really finish the drawing in time.

And he does. Of course, he does. In the end, after one hour and forty-five minutes, Jungkook has a new complete drawing on his right arm, along with other tattoos that adorn his body. I finished my food just in time to see him ending everything with mastery and calm, as if he wasn't worried about our bet. His hungry eyes find mine, and I know exactly what he wants. I swallow hard, squeezing my thighs together.

"I think I deserve my prize since I won the bet."

"Y-yes." I respond, trembling. My heart beats loudly in my chest, and I have to breathe deeply to finally realize that I don't feel fear, not even a hint of hesitation. All I feel is lust and desire. A longing to have him closer, to touch him in his rawest form. I sigh, watching him stand up and walk calmly towards me, like a predator; a lion eyeing its prey. I shrink back on the couch, small, now that he is standing. His knee sneaks between my legs, and separates my thighs before he squats down, and brings his face closer to mine.

"I don't want you to touch yourself here." He whispers, like a secret. His dilated pupils when he gazes at my mouth. "In my apartment. In my bed. I want you there."

Ask for a TAGLIST in the comments.

@ane102 @joonwater @ttipa

[pjsk-headcanons]

-post-mizu5/pre-ena5 hcs-

(focuses: vbs and niigo)

(a bit of a warning here: this one covers some pretty upsetting topics, especially during the niigo parts. like it gets ROUGH, especially with ena's part in the niigo section)

(this also serves as an expansion on some of the shinosibs hcs too)

(oh and one last thing, i want to make note of the timeline here. i'd like to believe there's around a 3-4 week gap (i'd say at most 1.5 months) between mizu5 and ena5 in story also i think that akito5 happened before mizu5, mostly since that does not fuck up my chronologies and works with the canon. i'm also focusing on vbs first)

-vbs-

(note: i like to believe that akito5 happened before mizu5. i should also note that the impact on vbs is more indirect and connected to an and especially akito)

an was particularly worried, having not heard from or seen mizuki whatsoever after the festival. (of course, mizuki frequently skipped school, so it wasn't as if not seeing her was a rare occurence, but being completely ghosted by her was extremely abnormal)

she ended up asking ena about mizuki relatively early on in this timeframe (mizuki would always talk about ena, so she knew the two had to be close), the look of unadulterated dread plastered upon ena's face for a moment before dodging the question all together horrified her. (she would not bring it up again after)

akito also started to become visibly worried and anxious. (he would end up frequently checking his phone, what if something happened to ena, what if she-) (it did surprise him though when he found a text from mizuki that one time, stating "happy birthday lil bro") (he did end up telling ena about it, he swears there was a glimmer of something in her eyes as he showed her the text, before immediately being told to fuck off) (she would start asking him about mizuki after that. as much as it annoyed him being pestered about mizuki, having that daily confirmation that his sister was somewhat okay (or atleast in the state to be able to ask about mizuki) meant the world to him)

toya and kohane were left in the dark about it all, but they were left almost helpless. (a large chunk of the time, the two were stuck idling)

at the worst points, akito would be frequently falling asleep at weekend garage and crase cafe or pacing around anxiously unable to focus on practicing, or would push himself so hard that he would end up collapsing afterwards. (and when asked about what was wrong, he would only give cryptic answers. he would seldom blame his sister, and when he did, there would be a certain pained look in his eyes) (even the vocaloids started to worry about him, especially after he passed out in the sekai after overexerting himself)

an was in a similar situation, either pushing herself too hard or anxiously pacing, but to nowhere as bad of an extent as akito.

-niigo-

//this section has a multitude of tws, especially for self-harm and references to a suicide attempt. nothing super explicit though.

between the events of mizu5 and the end of ena5, ena spiralled hard (might remember this from my shinosibs set of hcs) but the extent of which i haven't fully mentioned:

(there will be repeats of the things from the shinosibs.)

(it should also be noted that ena really hasn't fully recovered post-ena5, but god she is doing far better afterwards)

meeting with niigo would end much quicker. ena usually would barely speak, often getting lost in thought or leaving herself muted.

her art's color palettes shifted to focusing on more intense reds or pinks. (the pinker pieces would always be the more concerning ones)

these paintings tend to had more concerning themes too, usually focusing on death and abandonment. (usual recurring motifs were blood and wilted flowers. another was a very particular horrified expression)

extremely frequent nightmares and night terrors. (this and the lost sleep from worrying over mizuki would only worsen things) (she would tend to accidentally wake up akito, either because of her running to the bathroom to puke or splash water on her face or because she would breakdown into sobs) (she would never admit how often akito would end up consoling her)

and the incident (as the two would put it whenever mentioning it, downplaying it to avoid addressing it properly, because both of them knew that neither one of them are ready for that conversation) was a particularly bad night. akito always fears the fact that if he had gotten there any later, if he might've been too late. he could never get that visage of the sickly red propagating through the water in the tub, or the hollow yet horrified stare ena had upon seeing akito, it all remains etched into his mind. (in the moment, he would lie to himself, swearing that this situation was the result of some sort of freak accident, that she didn't actually intend to dissappear, it was a lie that didn't hold up long.)

neither one of them would ever tell a soul about what happened.

//tw end

mafuyu and kanade on the other hand were more blindsided by the situation.

when asked about it a week after, ena would tell them that "she fucked up and ruined everything"

mafuyu and kanade are similarly freaked out about it. (and the fact that ena refuses to tell them anything whatsoever about what transpired only worsens that anxiety)

kanade would become more and more guilty over it (even though mafuyu would try to reassure her that it wasn't her fault, and that no, she couldn't have done anything to prevent this from happening, but even then it hung over her head)

mafuyu would feel even more guilty for what they said to mizuki in the sekai. (they really never forgave themself for it. and to see it be practically proven right, with her vanishing without any info about if she was okay or not...)

niigo would be ground to a near-complete halt (of course they could work on expanding their backlog a bit, but without mizuki, the videos would not be anywhere near to quality that niigo kept and would have far less reach)

(-a quick aside-)

i am a bit sorry for this one, because this one is a definitely a bit of a rough one.

i did not expect the love and support for my headcanons!

i should note some things: i am a huge fan of hurt/comfort and angst

i've been debating writing a shinosibs angst fic among a few other things.

-la manchaland anon

‎

[mr-double-downer]

So since a jerkoff tonight wanted to mention “entry level positions” here’s the starting pay for grade 1’s/2’s for the waste water industry here california.

For a small fee of 99 dollars at my local community college (where I saw a flyer for this since I had gone in to take my Brit Lit final) I can take a three hour online course from 9am to 12 pm for a duration of four months. I’ll get my credentials for my grade one and will be eligible to take my grade 2 immediately. Even the minimum starting salary at 60 grand a year is very much doable to live on my own and save up to buy a house, even around here. There are five grades for operators as well as other types of positions for plant management and leadership that require a degree.

My father makes last time I checked 52 an hour as a grade two (he can’t pass his grade three because he’s not good at taking tests) along with all sorts of other benefits due to working for the city/county. He has no education higher than a high school diploma and he’s been doing this for over two decades. In fact the only reason why he learned about the job in the first place was because he knew a guy.

So what’s my point?

Opportunities like this in spite of the seeming ease of entry, are hard to come by. If I hadn’t taken a class in the building this flyer was posted in, I might not have seen it, and if my dad didn’t know a guy, he never would’ve found a breadwinner job so easily.

And sure 99 dollars isn’t much of an expenditure for me, but someone who is actually living paycheck to paycheck might have to think about it, even though it pays well because they’re always hiring operators as they build more plants. 9am to 12pm might be hard for some people to schedule around as it is kind of awkward time placement wise, and unless you have a laptop or computer (which can be another couple hundred dollar investment that some people might not have money to spend if they’re making minimum wage and living paycheck to paycheck) you’re going to have to find a public library with good internet access and hope they have computers available if at all, and honestly online classes really aren’t for everyone especially if you get distracted easy or find the lack of direct access to an instructor discouraging.

Social mobility/advancement has always been gatekept by money, because a lot of time to make money you need to spend money you might not have. This is really nothing to me money wise because I’ll be the first to admit I’m privileged in a lot of ways but a lot of people aren’t me. People don’t even talk about wastewater as industry because it’s also dirty work, the kind of work people turn their nose up to because you work with literal shit and shit water and piss and all sorts of other gross stuff.

Yet the entry level position that requires a 99 dollar enrollment fee and spending 3 hours a week for four months pays a lot better than most jobs that require a degree or trade school/apprenticeship.

So when people say entry level positions shouldn’t be livable I’m going to share this, and say “I bet you feel real stupid now huh?”

And some will say “but downer waste water is really important work our society couldn’t function without it!” yeah you’re right so would every other entry level wagie shit because I doubt most people have the means to live on their own without having to go to the grocery store every couple of weeks. Not even that but people lose their shit about not having access to caffeine, and if you have a pet especially an exotic one like a snake that requires mice whether dead or frozen how are you going to feed without some schmuck like me grabbing it for you?

now never did I say wagie shit needs to be a high paying career cause I’m a firm believer in a job being a job till the next one, but if people take me saying what amounts to “I don’t think people should have to struggle to live even a little comfortable” as some kind of… attack? then I really don’t know what to say other than go fuck yourself and develop real issues to be angry about.

[peachhcs]

https://www.tumblr.com/peachhcs/767959888939941888/httpswwwtumblrcompeachhcs767185748593164288

don’t apologize love writing takes time!

i love them and so glad they are communicating well ! i see will just taking more time to reassure making sure she feels a bit better more and maybe he starts calling her first more just to talk more and it helps a lot

maybe because she is hurt and cant play she comes to visit will for while doing some of her school online and it helps them a lot

part 10!! wow i can’t believe this accumulated so many parts. i think i’m gonna split this into two and make samy visiting will in california it’s own post if that’s ok and that’s what y’all want :) so sorry this one is a bit shorter than the others 😖

au masterlist

part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5, part 6, part 7, part 8, part 9

it’d been almost three weeks since samy’s shoulder injury. she was getting a lot better every week and pt was for sure helping, but she still couldn’t play. the doctors hadn’t cleared her yet, so instead, the brunette was stuck doing what little she could at practice like legs or any footwork the coach had the girls work on.

she was bit discouraged because it was the first time since she started soccer that she couldn’t play every single day. it wasn’t something samy was used to, especially being so stationary all the time.

she left practice early wednesday night after not having anything to do. hannah was still in class when samy got into their apartment and that’s when her phone started loudly vibrating in her backpack.

“what the hell,” the soccer player cursed to herself as she dropped her backpack onto the ground and began rummaging through it.

she got her hands on her phone in the second pocket, her slight frustration turning to happiness when she saw will’s name on the screen.

“hi, will,” samy smiled when his face appeared.

“hey, pretty. what are you doing?” the blonde wondered while samy shuffled into her room to talk.

“came back from practice early today. there wasn’t a lot i could do today, so i just left,” the brunette shrugged, falling back onto her bed.

“i’m sorry. how’s the shoulder?”

“it’s fine. i guess i’m just bored and wish i could be playing instead of sitting around all day,” the two shared a frown at her words.

“have you tried doing other things that don’t involve using your arms? walking? running?” will suggested.

“yeah, but it bores me really quickly. i think i need things that are high intensity and quick moving. walking is a bit too slow for me,” samy chuckled to herself.

“figures. you did grow up doing the most contact, quick moving sports.”

“how are you though? how’s everything?” samy changed the subject. she didn’t really like talking about herself that much so she always made it a point to ask will about his day.

“i’m good. practice has been long, but it’s been fine. i miss you,” will hummed and that made the girl smile. even though they did just see each other about two and a half weeks ago, they’ll always miss one another no matter how much time passed since last time.

“i’m glad everything’s going well. coach didn’t kill you too hard for just leaving without a word?”

“no..not really. i do have to, uh, clean the rink after every practice for the next like month, but hey i’ll take it,” the blonde shrugged and it always amazed samy how nonchalant will could be about hockey sometimes because if that were her, she’d probably be freaking out more.

“well, i admire your coolness about it. thanks for coming to visit again, by the way. i liked seeing you and hopefully we can see one another again soon,” the brunette grinned.

“you know, i’ve actually been kind of thinking about that. since you aren’t really playing because of your shoulder..i was wondering if you..wanted to take that opportunity to come to san jose for the first time since you and my mom and sister dropped me off here?” will asked like he was asking his mom to let him spend the night at someone’s house when he was younger.

a flush rose to samy’s cheeks, “like..come to san jose? i-i don’t really have money or anything..”

“i’ll buy your ticket,” the boy immediately cut in.

“i can’t ask you to do that. we’ve talked about this, will,” samy flushed some more.

“i know, i know, but i figured it could take your mind off of things for a weekend? i can show you around san jose some more, we can do whatever you want really. plus, i have the money. i don’t mind. i wanna see you,” will explained his reasoning making samy’s flush turn into a pink blush on her cheeks.

“i wanna see you too. you really don’t mind buying my ticket? i..i don’t wanna make you think i’m like relying on you to do that..”

“baby, i promise you’re not. i want to. let me buy it for you and anything else you want when you come visit?” will cheered and samy rolled her eyes.

“maybe not that far, but i guess a trip to san jose won’t hurt. i have been trying to figure out when i can come visit you,” a smile crept its way onto will’s lips the more samy’s decision leaned to yes.

“exactly. let me at least take some of the burden off of you by buying your plane ticket.”

it seemed to be decided as the brunette slowly gave in. her smile turned into a grin and so did will’s seeing her pretty face. “okay, okay, i’ll come visit. next weekend i have no tests or anything to worry about,” the hughes decided.

“yes! i knew i could convince you. i’ll buy them right now,” will exclaimed and the girl giggled as she watched her boyfriend open up his laptop.

“i love you,” samy hummed.

“i love you, too,” will blew her a kiss through the phone which samy caught. she held her hand to her heart and giggled when will spun his computer around to show her the tickets he was thinking about buying.

[bluedilute]

So, the Venture community has been going crazy since the season 12 trailer, and pretty rightfully so. I've been very vocal about how upset I've been with all of this, but I'm trying to still remain positive (which is pretty hard to do in general because of all the negativity in the world) and I want what's best for everyone

With that, I wanted to talk about why I think Venture is gonna be okay and will be getting a lot more content than they have now in the future.

I have a LOT of thoughts about the topic (this post has like 20 paragraphs), so if you have the patience, please read below the cut!

Starting with the most important point,

Advocacy

There has been a lot of talk about Ventures' lack of content as of recent, especially on Twitter. We're all very loud about our love for Venture. We literally put them on a billboard in times square– twice– to show how much we love them.

All this talk and everyone asking for more content for Venture got to the point where Aaron Keller himself made a post addressing the buzz, saying they have a "really exciting skin" for season 14.

Obviously that's pretty far away, and everyone is really upset about having to wait that long for one skin, but it's at least something, and it's better than not knowing when they're getting their next skin.

As well as that, it takes about 4-6 months to make a skin, so at least they're getting to it fast(ish)

Advocating for our respective hero(es) can go a long way, and that's been shown recently. If we keep at it and be loud, we can get more of what we deserve.

It's of course unfair that they're only getting a skin then, and they should have had some already made. But there's an explanation for this,

Ventures' release & layoffs

Venture was created/released during the time when the layoffs were effecting the team the most, and they're currently still recovering from it. The team doesn't have the final say on what goes into the game, and the higher ups have made increasingly more cash-grab decisions since their release.

I also think the decision to have them release with barely anything was because they were deemed as 'controversial', being trans and non-binary, and they had to focus on heroes they knew would make more money. Despite that, I don't think it is directly rooted in transphobia within blizzard. If it was, and word got out, i'm sure they would be fired fast (blizzard has had to fire a lot of awful people through the years).

Overall, Venture got very unlucky with their release, and therefore got nothing when s10 went live. As of now, things seem to be getting better, and the team is trying their best to make better things for everyone, which brings me to my next point:

Other neglected heroes

It's no question that a lot of heroes have been swept aside as of recent, namely Illari, Ramattra, Lifeweaver, and Baptiste. Kiriko has also gotten a lot of skins, and everyone is sick of it.

But, in the last two seasons, these heroes have gotten more content. Such as Weaver getting a lifeguard skin, Illari and Ramattra getting new skins in the transformers collab, and the s12 battle pass with Illaris' thoth skin, Ramattras Poseidon recolor (it's at least something) and Baptiste getting a mummy skin in the battle pass. (I want to note that Bap getting a mummy skin doesn't mean Venture can't get one too!)

All of these heroes, and I think a couple more (Lúcio being one) getting more content leads me to believe that Venture will also be getting more stuff in the future. But about what's out now:

All-time cosmetics

This is where I get into stuff that might be a bit of a stretch. There isn't too much to say here either, but just hear me out for a second.

Firstly, Venture has gotten new interactions all 3 seasons they've been in the game, even in s12, while Valeria Rodriguez (their voice actor) has been on strike, which he is very vocal about participating in. They've also gotten a voice line in the battle bass every season, and this season they have 2 new sprays to come out soon (I think it's 2, might just be 1)

Second, the rework for their default victory pose. It's a small change, but actually looks a lot better than the old pose. Their stance looks more relaxed, yet confident. The old one just looks stiff and awkward. It looks like more care was put into the new pose, plus I don’t think they rework victory poses that often, especially the defaults.

As mentioned, they were developed when the layoffs happened, so they were probably rushed out a bit too. Hence the stiff pose.

They're not fully being forgotten about, and they get at least a little more stuff every season since their debut. With that I expect the number to go up more every time.

Junos' cinematic

Now I know it's really frustrating that Juno got a cinematic while Venture hasn't even gotten a real origin story, but I think this is actually a good thing!

There hasn't been a proper cinematic for overwatch in a while from what I know, and one being made could be a light in a dark tunnel. This is the game breathing again, and it could mean a brighter future for Venture, and other new/neglected heroes.

Conclusion

Overall, Venture has had a rough start with their debut, and with a lack of content for them, it makes people feel like they were just made for LGBTQ brownie points to be swept under the rug for the next Kiriko skin (which is unfortunately probably true in some way). But their fans and mains are very vocal, and with people who main other heroes, even 'popular' ones, speaking out about how unfair it is to us, it seems to be serving us well.

I implore you to keep your voices heard, and advocate for a better game, and better treatment of your heroes. And we can help (at least start) to make overwatch a better game

As a treat, here's some Venture pics I've gathered the last few months

Bonus section if you wanna read it

If not, have a great day or night!

Final thoughts

I genuinely wish I didn't care about this game as much as I do, I feel like a sweaty looser defending it all for one character.

I've seen games, great games, time and time again become cash-grabs and drags as the people who make them become blinded by stardom. This happened with FNAF, fall guys, Hello neighbor (that game has always sucked, but the stardom blindness is there) and so many others. Weirdly enough I've had dreams about games completely changing, all in one patch. Seeing it happen in real time is disheartening.

Overwatch is a pretty special game. It has great lore, amazing art direction, and one of the most diverse casts I've ever seen, especially for a AAA game.

I only kinda played after being recommended the game by a friend, and i never really clicked with any of the characters I tried (I just stuck with Cassidy cause he's a cowboy and I thought it was funny)

Venture is the first character I played and immediately clicked with, and they're incredibly relatable to me on top of that. They're a huge nerd who's extremely passionate about their craft, they're goofy and optimistic, and being trans myself, learning they were trans too made me feel seen.

Them being treated like this while also being the only trans hero feels really disrespectful, and blizzard shouldn't get away with that. As of now, I'm glad we're all very vocal about it not being fair to any of us.

I'm an aspiring game designer, and I have a dream to make my own game one day. This whole situation has inspired me to get my shit together so I can go to college and get my game design degree. I hope to be able to save games like this, and give them a better chance. It's a big dream, but I believe I can do it with help from the right people

I genuinely want what's best for the world of overwatch, and especially all the characters who've been neglected over the years. There are always gonna be people who are fans of every hero they make for the game, and if they keep making more, they should know at this point to make content for that character. Playing favorites does nothing but harm the game, and most often makes the mains of the favored heroes arrogant and self-important (at least in my experience, specifically with kiriko mains)

Anyways, with all my thoughts out there for the internet to see, thank you for reading this really long rant! It took me a long time to write this, lol. I'm very passionate about game design, and Venture has definitely fueled that fire. Have a great day or night!

[andreafmn]

Collision | Chapter 20

Word Count: 3.1K Story Description: (Y/N) Uley is back home after being away for four years. Her life is at its first standstill and she is taking this time to find out who she is without school. But she never thought that coming back to the reservation would turn her whole life around. In the midst of secrets and mystery, a man crashes into (Y/N)’s and her life will never be the same. Chapter: 20/? A/N: your eyes do not deceive you, that's right, two posts in one day. Where is my prize? 😅😅 but I am very surprised at myself that I was able to post both Twilight stories. Also, don't hate me for that ending... My content will always be free, but if you’re feeling particularly generous, you can leave a tip on any of my posts  or buy me a coffee to support me and my love of writing Follow 😊 -> TikTok • Instagram • Business If you’d like to be tagged in this or any other story: click here Make sure you have my notifications on so you know every time I post! Please check if you’re tagged in the story, I’ve reached the limit of tags on Twilight again it seems. 😅

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Chapter 20

Time moved weirdly when you were stuck in the same routine. Days muddled together, only certain events sticking out. There were no beginnings or ends. There were only moments awake and moments asleep. That was how (Y/N) could tell that time had passed. When she was conscious, she could see that things had changed.

Her life consisted of work, school, Paul, her friends, and her family. There was nothing more. There was nothing less. Simply the same cycle, over and over again. It was good enough in the beginning. The semblance that things were getting better made her want to believe it.

But time was not kind to lies. As the seconds passed, the harder it was to keep her cracked façade whole. She could smile, she could laugh, she could enjoy life as it happened to her. Still, there was something that was always missing. A gaping hole in the middle of her chest that she covered every day.

(Y/N) had to believe that things got better. Even if at that moment it felt like things would turn worse, she needed to believe that they would change. She was getting everything she had dreamed of, everything she had worked so hard to obtain. And yet, there was a sadness inside her that didn’t allow her to enjoy it.

Two months had passed since the last time she had cried for them. Eight weeks since her eyes had dried and the pit had opened inside her. Since she had rid herself of the idea that they were ever coming back… that he was ever coming back.

She thought over the words she had told Bella. She needed to take a first step; any step that would make the life she was living real. She owed it to herself, she owed it to her mother, she owed it to her brother, she owed it to every person that had been beside her through it all.

“What’re you doing in my room, Paul?” (Y/N) was startled as she saw her friend’s reflection in the mirror before her. She had been focused on studying; her head engrossed in her books all afternoon. “Is everything okay?”

“Not exactly,” Paul responded “Jacob Black is going through his first shift and he’s freaking out. Won’t listen to anyone, not even Embry.”

“Where is he?”

“He’s in the woods with Sam and Embry.”

She followed the boy out of the house and into the darkness of the forest. Why they needed her help, she did not understand. (Y/N) was the least versed in the supernatural world. But if there was something she understood it was feeling scared and overwhelmed by it. It was an all-consuming implosion of the mind. Everything they had known as reality became a rose-colored canvas over what was truly happening.

Far into the trees and away from the town, Sam and Embry stood before a giant russet-furred wolf. The animal moved from side to side, his eyes far away and scared. The boys tried to calm him, lifting their arms in a show of peace. But it did nothing to calm the poor boy that was stuck in his wolf form.

“Guys, step away from him,” (Y/N) called as she closed the distance between her and the wolf. “He’s scared.”

“Paul, I told you not to bring her here,” Sam seethed. “She could get hurt. Again.”

“He did nothing wrong,” she reprimanded. “Just get away from him, please.”

They quickly did as told, leaving the girl and the wolf. But she could still feel her brother’s cautious stare following her every move. (Y/N) was tentative in her steps, showing Jacob no sign of danger. She stared into the brown of his eyes, trying to connect with the scared boy beyond the animal.

It had only been a week since he had confronted (Y/N) regarding Embry. He had taken her by surprise, wondering why his best friend had suddenly started to avoid him and Quil, and had started hanging out with Sam’s group. She had done what she could, but the boy was too angry to stand reason.

He had rapped harshly against her front door, his knuckles beating against the wood loudly. She had been studying, far too focused on her books to know who it could have been at that hour. It was late at night and her mother had left only two hours before to work. And there was no chance that it had been Paul or Embry since they were out on patrol that night.

She sauntered down the stairs, fear clutching at her limbs as she walked. There was no reason for anyone to be knocking on her door that loudly. It made her tremble, but she was smarter than to allow fear to overtake her.

“Jacob?” (Y/N) had called out in surprise as she swung open the door. “What are you doing here at this hour?”

“Look, (Y/N), I have nothing against you ‘cause you have always been a good friend to me,” he sighed. His eyes were red, telling her that he had been crying. “But I need to know what your brother is doing. It was weird when he took Jared, even weirder when Paul joined. Now, he’s changed Embry as well.”

“W-what do you mean he changed Embry, Jake? He was there at your birthday party last month.”

“But he wasn’t really there, was he?” Jacob continued. “He’s been avoiding Quil and me in school. He comes up with excuses or doesn’t even respond when we call to hang out. And he barely said a word to me other than ‘happy birthday’ at the party. And now, we see him hanging out with your brother and his weird gang.”

“It is not my place to talk about what happens with Embry, Jake; what happens with any of them for that matter,” she tried to explain calmly. “All I can tell you is that he definitely is not in a dangerous gang like it’s rumored. My brother is not a dangerous person.”

“Then, why can’t Embry talk to us, huh? Why is he clearly under instructions to not talk to his friends or even to his mom?” Jacob exclaimed. “She’s been asking us nonstop what’s happening with her son, and we have nothing we can say.”

“Jacob, I understand how frustrating this must be. But I can’t say anything. It’s really not my place.”

“So, what? You’re just gonna let your brother keep taking guys from the rez and making them turn their backs on everyone they know?” he said, his voice rising slightly. “It’s not right, (Y/N), and you know it.”

“I wish I could tell you what is going on, Jake, but…”

“But it’s not your place to tell. Yeah. I got that,” he scoffed. “If there are any more guys that are taken from their families because of your brother, it’ll be on you, (Y/N).”

“No one has been taken from their families, Jacob,” she replied defensively, biting down on her tongue to not anger the boy further. “They’re always free to come and go.”

“Yet they’re not free to talk,” he seethed. “I can’t believe you don’t see what they’re doing, (Y/N). You’re smart enough to know that something’s not right.”

“I’m sorry I can’t be of more help, Jake,” she sighed. “But I can promise you that your friend is safe.”

“It doesn’t matter much to me that he’s that safe when he can’t even say hi to me in the halls.”

“Jacob…”

“No, it’s fine, (Y/N). It’s not your place.”

He had left her house completely infuriated. So angry that he wouldn’t even return her waves when they ran into each other in town. And she understood his anger. Someone had come between him and his best friend. They had ripped away a relationship without a single reason.

But now, he would understand the why. Now, he would be in on the secret.

(Y/N) reached her hand out, showing Jacob that she meant no harm. Her movements were slow and calculated, always in sight of the brown wolf. She was letting him know he was okay, that he was safe.

“I know you’re scared, Jacob,” she spoke softly and calmly. “I bet you’re stressed too. Nothing that is happening is making sense.”

Jacob let out a huff in response, his eyes searching her over.

“I promise we will let you know everything that’s happening,” she continued. “But the first thing we have to do is get you back in human form. And I’m gonna help you with that, okay?”

The wolf’s head nodded, his pacing stopping dead in his track. He walked toward her outstretched hand, his snout bumping against it. He nuzzled into her, his pained eyes begging her to keep talking.

“You need to calm down,” she told him. “Center your mind and think how it feels to be in your human form. You have to focus and keep calm.”

It seemed her voice was what he needed to do the trick. The wolf stepped back and closed his eyes. She was almost sure she could feel the air changing around them as Jacob focused. And then, it all happened swiftly. One second, the russet-colored wolf towered over them. And the second, Jacob was covering up his naked body with his hands.

“Uh, is there a chance any of you brought a change of clothes?”

“Here,” Sam said as he threw the boy a bag of clothes. “There are many things you’re gonna have to learn now.”

Jacob disappeared behind a tree to get changed, running to shield himself from the others. (Y/N) had no idea what it was like for the body to go through that shift. But she could begin to imagine how disconcerting it would be to have your body turn into a massive wolf after an angry outburst.

“Thank you, (Y/N),” Paul said as they waited outside of Sam’s house as Jake was informed of everything. “We should have you over every time a new kid shifts. You’re good at calming them down.”

“I guess I can understand how it feels to not feel in control of your own body,” she sighed with a smile. “But I’m glad I could help with Jake. Just last week he was grilling me over what you guys were doing.”

“we’re not doing anything wrong.”

“Not in the eyes of the town, Paul. People think that you’re a dangerous gang that is corrupting the boys in the reservation.”

“Eh, I’m used to it,” he shrugged. “Not many people thought I was a good guy before. I doubt I could change their minds now. And, honestly, I don’t care what people think of me. Just you.”

“Well, then, you’re lucky I like you, kid,” she laughed. “You would be very sad if I didn’t.”

“I really would,” he said, making her laughter die in her throat. He was too serious. Too serious for the playful tone she had spoken with. “I couldn’t live without you.”

“Paul, what’re you…?”

“I’m serious, (Y/N),” he continued as he took her hands in his. “You’re the most important person in my life, (Y/N). I would die without you.”

“You’re important to me too, Paul,” she smiled softly. “But where is all this coming from?”

“I just… gods, I just need to tell you.”

“Tell me what?”

As Paul opened his mouth to speak, the door to the back slid open, Jared and Embry tumbling out. They wore playful smiles on their faces and were holding plates of food in their hands.

“Yo, (Y/N),” Jared called. “Jake’s asking for you.”

“We’re sort of in the middle of something here,” Paul muttered through gritted teeth. “He can wait.”

“We’ll talk later, Paul,” she smiled as she put distance between them, her heart beating a million miles a minute. “I’m gonna go see what he needs.”

“But (Y/N)…”

“Later,” she called from the door.

(Y/N) had an inkling of what Paul was going to say. She could feel it deep in her bones. The past three months had been perfect –too perfect, she guessed. The last thing she wanted was to break things off with Paul, to put distance between them. But she knew that it was what would be best for them both.

As she walked into the house, she allowed herself to push down the thought. To forget that sooner rather than later, she had to push him away. To forget that the start of her poorly mended new life crumbling was nearing. Nothing good lasts. That much she knew.

Jacob was waiting for her at the dining table, a look of shame plastered across his face. He was shaking slightly, the weight of the new information heavy on his shoulders. And she could see what he truly was. A boy that had his whole life ripped from under him.

“Hey,” she called out softly. “Jared said you wanted to talk to me.”

“Yeah,” he chuckled softly, his head snapping toward her voice. “I owe you an apology, (Y/N).”

“No, Jake. You were angry. I understand.”

“But you didn’t deserve to be on the receiving end of the anger,” he continued. “You were protecting Embry, protecting all of them. And I was pretty mean to you.”

“You don’t even make the top five, Jake,” (Y/N) laughed as she sat beside him. “But, if it makes you feel better, I accept your apology. Even if there’s nothing to apologize.”

Jacob remained quiet for a second, his gaze falling onto his hands. “Your brother said I can’t see Bella,” he peeped. “I know it’s to keep her safe, but I don’t know if I’ll be able to. I can’t just abandon her right now.”

“I understand that, Jake. But this is only for the time being,” (Y/N) tried to help. “You need to learn to control the phase. If something makes you snap when you’re with her…”

“I know. Sam told me… all of it,” he sighed. “What if I imprinted on her? She’d be allowed to know everything then, right?”

“You can’t force yourself to imprint on someone, Jake. It doesn’t work like that.”

“Not that we know of,” he smiled, hopeful. “I’m gonna try and I’ll be the first.”

“Jake,” she called as the boy jogged to the front door. “Jake!”

“Thanks for the talk, (Y/N)!”

And the next second, he was gone.

“Maybe delusion runs with the shifting gene,” she said to herself.

(Y/N) used the moment to leave Sam’s house, though. She needed to escape that conversation that Paul was sure to want. Things were changing once more and she was not ready for it. The last thing she wanted was to lose her grasp on the reality she had forged for herself. She had crafted it to the most minuscule detail and she couldn’t let him ruin it.

She ran to her home, locking herself in her room. She could feel panic building inside her. As the reins she held on her façade slipped, she could only feel the dread that was underneath. The (Y/N) from six months before was trying to claw her way out. To make her feel the same pain and sadness, making the hole in her chest grow.

But she couldn’t let it. She couldn’t let any of it out. She had to keep every last ounce of those emotions buried deep inside, locked away with the memory of him. It was the only way she would survive. The only way all of that heartbreak would have been worth it.

Instead of spending the night studying as she had planned, (Y/N) crashed on her bed, succumbing to a tiredness she didn’t know she had. She had only planned to rest her eyes for a second, not to completely fall asleep.

She was walking down a path she had come to hate, but one she still knew like the back of her hand. The road to perdition, she had branded it in her mind. She could see the bridge as she walked, begging her limbs to not keep moving. She never wanted to be back there, much less when he wasn’t there.

But the closer she got, she could make out that there was a figure standing there. A figure she had done so much to forget about, even if she never wanted to. Not really.

“(Y/N),” he breathed as she stopped in front of him. “God, how I’ve longed to see your face again.”

“Carlisle,” she said, her voice breaking as tears burned in the back of her eyes. She couldn’t walk to him. Too scared that he would disappear if she did. “Where have you been?”

“Being a coward, I guess,” he replied. “I have missed you, my love. So much more than I could ever tell you.”

“Then, show me,” she commanded in a whisper. “Show me how much you truly have.”

Carlisle extended his hand and she gladly took it, sighing happily as the coldness enveloped her. He pulled her over the treaty line, making her body crash into his. He placed one hand on the low of her back as the other cradled her cheek. His amber eyes looked intently into hers, the warmest smile he could muster spread across his lips.

“Kiss me,” she whispered and Carlisle obliged.

He pressed his lips softly to hers, love slipping past his mouth. It was just as she had remembered it. Just as cold, just s perfect. It was what she had been missing for months. A true connection of love and passion. Her hands traveled up his chest, feeling. He felt so real.

“I miss you, Carlisle,” she cried as they parted, his thumb wiping away the tears that fell. “Why won’t you come back?”

“I’m right here, my love.”

“No, you’re not,” she sighed defeatedly. “This is only a dream. I know it is. Because you’re not actually here.”

“But I am, (Y/N),” he smiled. “You can feel me. You can see me. You can hear me. Who’s to say that I’m not.”

“No, Carlisle,” she said sadly, taking a step back. “If you were here, I wouldn’t be able to wake up.”

She stood on the railing of the bridge, making sure she was past the treaty line. She looked down, the river angry and rushing, rocks piled up everywhere.

“What are you doing, (Y/N)? Get down from there.”

“I can’t do this, Carlisle,” she sobbed. “Not even in my dreams. Because when I wake, you won’t be there, and I’ll be right back where I started.”

Without another thought, she let herself fall, and she waited for the crash.

But it never came. She woke up in a sweat a second later, clutching at her racing heart. The beginning of the end, she thought. She could feel herself crumbling, and it scared her. 

Next ->

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[mrpldiddles]

accidental | t.blyth

a/n: just a little tom x remi insta edit that came to me randomly and that i'm posting so i can keep procrastinating my homework :) there is a timeline of their relationship that i have planned out and this does defer from that so it's a little impulsive post :)

warnings: slut shaming, pregnancy, mentions of cheating

tomremi posted:

tomremi remi seen out and about lately👀 congrats to the happy couple!!

comments:

user1 OMG??!!?!

user6 omg tom’s gonna officially be a daddy😩😩😩😩😩😩

-> user10 and remi’s gonna officially be a mommy🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭

user3 IS IT TOMS??!!?

-> user4 ofc it is???

-> hater1 i wouldn’t be so sure

-> user2 girl what

-> user7 yeah wtf??

-> hater2 i wouldn’t put it past her to cheat on tom she’s not good enough for him

-> tomremi girl get a life fr

-> hater2 says the one with a fan account for a celebrity couple

user6 are they even married???

-> user8 does it matter?? let them be happy??

-> hater3 it was totally an accident she’s such a slut

-> user4 1) it’s just as much tom’s doing 2) no need to be slut shame, they’re in a happy and healthy relationship together and 3) it’s not our business

-> hater3 she just seems the type🤷‍♀️

user12 OMG SO HAPPY FOR TOM AND REMI!!!

-> hater5 i doubt they last until the birth

-> hater6 if i were tom i’d bolt to not be tied down by her

-> hater5 riiiigggghhhtttt she’s totally baby trapping him

-> user14 omg wtf did remi ever do to you let the girl live

-> tomremi y’all haters needs to chill tf out and let them both live and enjoy this time in their lives.

remi.alaric and tomblyth posted:

remi.alaric what if i told you none of it was accidental (or your business)

tagged: @tomblyth

comments:

user2 THE CAPTION HAHAHAHA YES REMI GIRL GET THEIR ASSES

user5 SO HAPPY FOR YOU BOTH!!!!

user3 yessss girl shut those haters UP so happy for you both congrats!!!!

rachelzegler strongest woman i know and the most radiant mama ever can’t wait to meet baby bean🥰🫶

-> remi.alaric so blessed and grateful to have you in my corner❤️

user9 those haters are reeeaaalllll quiet now since you gagged them!! congrats girl!!!

-> user5 SHE SLAYED SO HARD

stevie.alaric can’t wait to meet my godchild and tell them all about how badass their mom is🤭

-> stevie.alaric still can’t believe you’re gonna be a mom tho🤢

-> remi.alaric still can’t believe you’re gonna be an aunt aren’t we still only 7 and 5🫣

mama-alaric me and your dad are so proud of you sweetie and how strong you are. you’re going to be the best mom you can be no matter what anyone else has to say. i love you honey❤️

-> remi.alaric going to do my best because i learnt from the best. i love you and dad so much momma❤️

user12 THE HATERS ARE GAGGED FR FR HAHAHA

user15 remi you’re gonna be absolutely the best mom and your real fans are so so happy for you and tom!!

hunterschafer so happy for you two!! can’t wait to meet the little bean🥰

mrsamclaflin congrats to you both! you’re going to make the most amazing parents!❤️

sukiwaterhouse so so happy for you guys!! can’t wait for our little ones to meet one day🤭🥰

-> remi.alaric they’re going to be the absolute bestest of friends❤️

tomblyth the strongest and most incredible woman i’ve ever met. i’m so impossibly in love with you🩵

-> remi.alaric i’m so in love with you my heart physically aches🩵

remi.alaric and tomblyth posted:

tomblyth i’ve never been so in awe as i have been watching you these past months. watching you grow our baby and begin to become a mom has been so fulfilling and inspiring and i find myself falling more and more in love with you each day. i can’t wait to meet our little bean and fall even more in love with the both of you, if my heart can possibly expand anymore.

p.s. the last picture’s my absolute favourite🩵

tagged: @remi.alaric

comments:

user1 my eyes are sweating so badly right now😭😭😭

user4 oh my god he’s so in love with her😩😩

rachelzegler i’m not crying my eyes are just taking a shower😭😭😭

-> user3 same here girl🤧🤧

-> user7 pass the tissues😖😖

rachelzegler so so happy and excited for you both, two of the most talented, humble, generous and STUNNING people in this world. little bean is so so loved already

-> user9 petition for rachel to be little bean’s godmother!!!!!

hunterschafer the most stunning and deserving couple ever!! so so happy for you both!!

user5 oh so he’s in LOVE love

stevie.alaric you’ll never love her as much as i do😤😤

-> stevie.alaric but i’m so happy you’re here!!

-> user8 STEVIE LMAOOOOOO

-> user3 not stevie doing a complete 180 in tom’s comments😭😭

-> hater1 even her sister doesn’t think they’ll last pfffttt

-> stevie.alaric girl where EXACTLY did i say that?

-> user4 OHP stevie’s madddddd

-> user8 the alaric sisters are eating the haters UP

hater5 i still think she baby trapped him

-> tomblyth and i still think you should shut the fuck up

-> user2 OMG TOM

-> user9 tom and remi ain’t taking ANYONES shit

-> user6 baby bean has the most badass take-no-shit parents I LOVE IT

-> hater5 it was just an opinion🤷‍♀️ no need to attack.

-> remi.alaric well no one asked for it🤷🏻‍♀️ no need to be sensitive and dish it when you can’t take it.

-> user4 i am LOVING this clapback era for tom and remi

-> user5 baby bean is gonna grow up and take ZERO shit from ANYBODY

remi.alaric thank you for being the most supportive, generous and caring partner anyone could ever ask for. i truly couldn’t do any of this without you and i wouldn’t ever want to. i love you and our little bean so incredibly much i can’t express it. forever and ever my love🩵

-> tomblyth no need to thank me when i’d do it all again in a heartbeat. forever and ever because you’re never getting rid of me🩵

-> stevie.alaric y’all are sickeningly sweet

-> rachelzegler so adorbs i can’t🤧

-> rachelzegler but save it for offline jeeez

[shes-homeward-bound]

Crash and Burn | Chapter 11

Summary: You’re the first female driver to compete in the Formula 1 World Championship in decades and it's your second year of navigating through a male-dominated sport. Your talent and drive to prove yourself made you vicious on the grid. Your seemingly unshakeable confidence was never questioned- until a certain Ferrari driver made you crash and burn.

Pairing: Carlos Sainz Jr. x Reader

Chapters: 11/11

Warnings: swearing

Word Count: 4.6k

Posted on: 05/25/2023

masterlist

A/N: The final chapter is finally here. I am so sorry for the wait. I wanted to make sure that it was all wrapped up and cute and fluffy just for you guys. Thank you so so much for taking the time to read whatever I write. I appreciate every single one of your comments. It was so fun writing for Carlos and a driver reader.

Finally, after many years in Formula One, Carlos Sainz had gotten his first pole position here in Silverstone. He cheers and scrambles out of the car and immediately gets congratulated by Charles and Max. He couldn’t believe it. After years of hard work, he has finally gotten the best chance to win a Grand Prix. He was thrumming with excitement and disbelief, he still couldn’t believe it even when they started interviewing him. Once finished, he walks back to the pitlane and is met with a flurry of kisses.

“P1! P1! P1!” you chanted. “Babe, you did it!”

You give him a crushing hug and he returns the favor. It’s been almost 2 months since the accident and he was finally comfortable enough to hold you as tight as he wanted. 

“I didn’t expect it! I thought I was doing bad out there.”

You give him a peck on the cheek. “This is your weekend, Carlos. You can do this!”

You and Carlos part ways only to have him meet you in Aston Martin hospitality so you could drive together back to your place. You offered to let him stay in your apartment for the British Grand Prix so Carlos let his parents have his hotel room. 

After a shower, you and Carlos lounged in your living room trying to decompress as much as possible. Dinner was cooking in the oven and you leaned on Carlos as you both sipped on your electrolyte drinks. The night before the race was essential and your performance coaches were adamant that you send pictures of everything you ate and drank. Rupert and Anna were so used to staying by your side and monitoring everything, but to give you two privacy, they resorted to constant messaging making sure you were prepping for the race. The oven dings and you pull out the baked salmon, roasted vegetables, and baked sweet potato. You send the text to the group chat and place your phone face down on the kitchen counter. 

Despite seeing Carlos almost every week, it didn’t mean you got to spend much time alone. It was one of the busiest parts of the season and you were always in meetings, needed for simulators, and doing things for media and promotions. The only times you would interact was a quick kiss if you happened to pass by, sometimes you couldn’t even see each other at the end of the day because you were too tired. You and Carlos were always surrounded by other people, so times like this were precious because you were finally alone. 

Carlos joins you on the kitchen island and helps you set up the plates and utensils. The last time you were doing something domestic was back in your apartment in Monaco. While you were eating dinner, you made Carlos do some manifesting with you. He rolled his eyes but did it anyway, he would do anything to make you happy. You qualified for P7 so Carlos included you and manifested that you would find your way to third place and share the podium with him. While you would love to, you had Charles, the Red Bulls, and Mercedes to worry about. You know you would have more podiums to come but it was Carlos who needed this. He wasn’t having the best season, and you wanted this to boost his confidence. 

You both wake up from a restful sleep and immediately start your race day routines. You and Carlos drive over to the hotel where Pierre and Yuki were staying to have breakfast with them. You were still a little superstitious about it so you never missed race day breakfast with Pierre. So far, everything was going alright, you and the boys safely made it to the circuit and split up to go to find your teams. 

It’s a few hours before the race and you are sitting in Aston Martin hospitality sipping on your electrolyte drink while you contemplate your life. Two months ago, everything was seemingly falling apart. Your relationship with Carlos was on the line and you were in one of the most ridiculous scandals in all of motorsport. You were in a huge car crash but were able to walk away and recover from your injuries. It’s so strange to look back and see how different your life was. Now, you and Carlos are happier than ever and you have just signed a contract to continue your next two years in Formula One with Aston Martin. Life finally seemed normal again and that scared you.

If things are good, then something bad is bound to happen. You know that’s a horrible mindset to have but after the accident, you’ve been having trouble staying positive. You find yourself paranoid that you would lose every good thing in your life. Carlos knows how you feel and he does his best to be there for you but he was busy too, so you did your best to keep these thoughts to yourself. Anna set you up with a therapist and you’ve listened to the advice she’s giving you. You’ve been getting better at staying positive, this is why you made sure to take some time every day to think about the good things in life. Like in this moment where you just sit and people watch. Aston Martin’s hospitality doors were constantly opening and each person was just as interesting. There were the new interns who would shyly look at you, one of Seb’s engineers who was always nervous, and the guys from your pit crew who were all pumped up and waved at you. 

The rest of the day was a blur as your anxiety increasingly spiked. You wanted this win for Carlos and it was beginning to affect you to the point Anna made you go for a quick run to shake off some of your nerves. It helped for a little bit but by the time you were in your car and doing the formation lap, you were buzzing with anticipation. 

You breathe deeply and do your best to get into the racing mindset. Once all the lights turn off, you send it. You had a fantastic start when you heard the screech of metal from behind you. You whip your head to see one of the Alfa Romeo’s careening past your car. You start swearing when you notice they are upside down. You had already driven too far but you looked in your side mirror to see they crashed into the fence.

“Holy shit! Who was that?” you yell into the radio.

“Red Flag. Red Flag. Proceed to the pitlane.”

You start breathing heavily. “Who was that? Valtteri? Guanyu?”

“It was Guanyu. We don’t have information yet, make your way to the pitlane.”

You looked ahead and everyone’s lights were flashing as you all slowly drove to the pitlane. Carlos’s car was ahead and you let out a sigh of relief, at least he was safe. Once everyone was parked and you received the ‘okay’ to leave the car, you scrambled out and ran to the pit wall. 

“What happened?” your eyes grew big as flashes of your accident appeared. “Are they okay?”

“Zhou, Russel, and Albon are out,” says your strategist. 

He points to the screen that was showing live helicopter and drone footage. It looked bad, Gunayu’s car was wedged between the fence and a barrier. You squint and see that George was on the scene, and see ambulances for Alex and Guanyu. Breathing hard, you find yourself having to use one of the engineers to help with your balance. You squint at the screen just hoping that you would be able to catch a glimpse of him moving in his car. You didn’t even notice you were hyperventilating until Carlos appeared in front of you and told you to breathe slowly. He brings you close and you bury your head against his chest.

“I can’t look anymore, let me know when he gets out.”

Carlos holds you and tells you little updates while you close your eyes and work on breathing slowly. After a minute, he tells you to look up, and that's when you see Guanyu safely get out of the car. You sag onto Carlos and tears start streaming down your face, as quickly as possible, he leads you deep into the garage where you can let all your emotions out and away from the cameras. Someone hands you a tissue and you do your best to contain yourself. Now that you knew the boys were okay, you needed to get back into racing mode. That’s when you suddenly remember Carlos and his predicament.

“Carlos! You’re P2 right now!'' You look at the tv screens and you can see that the marshalls and other staff members were cleaning up the area and restoring the barrier. Guanyu's car was still stuck and the people on the cranes still had to figure out how to get it out. “They’re going to redo the line-up. This is your chance to get your position back!”

Carlos just looks at you and smiles. You had just relived a trauma and here you were trying to get yourself together for his benefit, he did have the greatest girlfriend. He makes you sit on the floor and he sits on the ground so that your legs are touching. 

“Don’t worry about me, I just want to make sure you’re ready to race. I’ll make sure Max doesn’t get ahead of me. I know I can win this, I can feel it,” says Carlos. 

You lean your head on his shoulder and take in a shaky breath. “I’ll be okay to drive, it was just so strange to see an accident so similar to mine. I’ll make sure to visit their garage after to see if we can see Guanyu.”

You and Carlos see Rupert peeking into the Aston Martin garage and the both of you laugh. It was time to go back to work. Pressing a kiss on your forehead, he wishes you luck. You take him by the shoulders and look at him sternly. 

“Max is going to attack and be aggressive right away. He’s already pissed it’s a restart but that’s okay because you're faster and smarter. You can do this!” you say giving him a quick kiss and a shove out of the garage.

The engineers pull you aside and show your data from the start and they tell you what you have to do to achieve the same results. The team principal pulls you aside to see if you were mentally okay to race and you reassure him that you were okay. He seemed hesitant to believe you but when he sees the intensity in your eyes, he knows you won't disappoint him. Seb finds you sitting with Anna and your pit crew. He squats down and gives you a reassuring smile.

“How are you holding up?”

“I’m a little embarrassed. I got emotional but I'm okay. I’m just glad to hear the boys are safe.”

He nods. “I talked to George and he told me Guanyu is fine and just a little shaken up. The medics were able to get him safely out of the card news. Us drivers are insane, something huge happens like this and all we do is take a moment, shake it off, and go back on the track.”

You look at him gratefully and nod.

“We’re all crazy, but that’s what makes us the best in the world,” he says, squeezing your shoulder. 

The team principal says that the race starts in ten minutes so you go to the bathroom and go over your different strategies with the engineers one last time. You look for Carlos, and when you see that he was already in the car with his helmet on, you laugh. The other drivers were still in their garages, he was the only one out there. Making your way over to his Ferrari, you bend down and get at eye level with him. You stick your pinky finger out and he hooks his with yours.

“Don’t forget what I told you, faster and smarter. You got this.”

You see him wink at you through his visor. Using the halo to stabilize yourself, you lean down and kiss the top of his helmet. The pit crew that surrounded him smiled at the gesture, they wished you luck as you headed to your car. The other drivers start trickling onto the pitlane and you’re met with Anna who gives you a pep talk. With your helmet and seat belts on, you closed your eyes and imagined yourself going through the corners of Silverstone.

Because of the accident, some of the guys may be a little hesitant at the start so you plan on using that to your advantage. You have had a strange relationship with driving after the accident. Yes, 30 minutes ago you may have been crying over the crash but that was because it was so similar to the one you had. You find yourself much more aggressive than you were before the accident. You weren’t too cocky about it where you put yourself in more danger but you drove with absolutely no hesitation. The fans noticed and loved it, your family was expectedly weary but they trusted you and your judgment. Since the crash, you have been top 10 in every race and you plan on keeping it like that. 

A formation lap is done and when all the lights go green, you floor it. Turns 1-3 were smooth and once you’re on Wellington Straight, you finally let yourself breathe again. Your strategist tells you you moved up two places making you P5. This excites you, maybe you can make it to the podium with Carlos but you don’t get too excited. You had a whole race ahead of you and anything can happen. You have some interesting battles with Fernando, Lando, and Charles battling for 4th place. You almost had a close call with Fernando and you had to bite your tongue so you wouldn’t lash out at him through the radio. You resort to grumbling incoherent swears at your engineer and he just comically responds with “I know” knowing it was completely Fernando’s fault you almost crashed into him.

You let out a whoop into the radio when you cross the finish line. You finished P5 and was happy with your performance and was even more excited knowing that Carlos got his first-ever win. Parked in the pitlane and clambering out of the car, you clap Charles on the back but before he could even acknowledge you, you were sprinting away from him. Running as fast as you can, you make a beeline for Carlos and jump into his outstretched arms. He holds you tight and after a few moments he rips his helmet off and you do the same. You beam at each other as you clasp your hands around his shoulders, he was glowing and his eyes sparkled.

“Congratulations Carlos Sainz, you’re a Grand Prix Winner,” you say as he holds you tightly. “I am so proud of you and I love you so much.”

He smiles and brings his hands to your face, he was speechless as his heart beat fast at all the celebrations around him. Carlos kisses you deeply and the engineers and other teams around him start cheering loudly. You let go of him and he gives a little cheeky wink. While he hugs his parents and sisters, you get weighed and make your way back to the barricade. Carlos leaves to go to the cool-down room and with the help of his cousin and manager, you climb over the barrier to join his team and family. Carlos Senior and his sisters congratulate you for your p5 finish and Reyes gives you a bone-crushing hug, not caring at all that you are drenched in sweat. 

The announcer calls Carlos’s name and he steps outs waving at the fans who cheer him on. Once situated on the podium, Carlos looks down from the podium balcony, he can’t help but choke up. Just below him were the most important people in his life. The sea of red, his family, and you look up at him with smiles on your faces. He watches as you clutch his mother and sister’s hands and bounce in anticipation during the national anthem. Here he was about to receive a P1 trophy and he has never been happier or more grateful. Carlos knew his life was good, he wanted to be in motorsports and now here he was living the dream. He never thought he needed companionship until he met you, a person who would understand his goals in life and know how much dedication is needed for Formula One. 

When Carlos clutches his trophy, he meets your gaze and smiles softly. He had a second chance to deserve your love and he wasn’t going to mess it up this time. He knows what you both share is a once in a lifetime and he will never do anything to jeopardize your relationship. He caught a glimpse of what it would feel like if you were no longer in his life and he never wanted to feel like that again. 

—

August 2022 - Formula One Summer Break

The cool blue water looks more and more enticing as the hot sun beats down on your body. You prop yourself onto your elbows and see Carlos on the other side of the boat talking to Lando and Alex. You look around the yacht and see drivers and their friends or significant others lounging on the deck. You were floating somewhere in the Mediterranean Sea with a bunch of exhausted Formula One drivers with sore bodies. Toto Wolff offered his yacht to George for a couple of days to kick-start the summer break. George invited everyone but the younger drivers with no spouses and children were the only ones who took up the offer. The day after the race was usually painful and you and your friends could not wait to get back to Monaco.

You look at Charles sitting on the chaise lounge next to you, staring off into the horizon. The last few months have been rough on the Ferrari drivers but it was Charles who was suffering. He was leading the championship but bad luck just kept hitting him every weekend.   

You tap him on the shoulder and he looks at you with his eyebrow raised.

“Do you ever have moments where you just can’t believe that this is your life? I mean– I’m on a yacht with my closest friends and coworkers. It just happens they’re all Formula One drivers which means that I am one of you,” you say blissfully looking out into the ocean and the faint outline of France and Monaco. “I can hardly believe it.”

Charles looks at you and smiles. Ever since the accident happened, you were always so verbal with your gratitude. You would be doing the most mundane things such as doing the track walk or toasting bread and you would stop, smile and strike up a conversation with the closest person. There was a time when Carlos was holding your hand in the paddock and you stopped walking just so you could lift the clasped hands, and marvel at it for a few seconds before telling Carlos how much you loved him. Those who witnessed it couldn’t stop smiling, they loved your love.   

“We are so lucky,” agreed Charles. “Sometimes I forget, but times like this remind me how lucky I am to be alive and feel the sun or laugh with my friends.”

You look at him as he wistfully gazes toward the direction of Monaco. He thinks of those he had lost, remembering to live each day like it was his last. Charles is ashamed to admit it but sometimes he’d forget so he was glad to have someone like you in his life to remind him what was important. 

“That accident you had in Miami–” he stops before his voice cracks. He lets out a puff of air and breathes deeply. “I can’t imagine how painful that must’ve been.”

“You know, I don’t think I’ve thanked you enough for all the help and support you’ve given me and Carlos this year. Especially after the accident. You were always there to help us and I want you to know how much I appreciate it.”

Charles waves his hand nonchalantly, “I know you would've done the same if roles were reversed.”

Sometimes you would go back to the footage of the accident, you felt a phantom pain in your chest every time you saw the car careen towards the barrier. What hurt the most was seeing how people were reacting to it, you remember seeing Carlos and Lando watching the screens intently but not Charles. You could see the scene so clearly, him facing away from the monitors and breathing hard, his skin pale at the thought of your demise. When you were at the hospital he doted over you, stayed by your side whenever Carlos or Anna had to leave. You remember the way he and his girlfriend would visit you whenever they could when you all got back to Monaco. It made you smile to think of the good friends you had in your life. Charles was right, you would do the same exact thing if roles were reversed. 

Changing the subject to each of your performances this year, Charles starts talking about his frustrations with himself and the car. The two of you get distracted when you see Daniel push Yuki off the boat which leads to Pierre throwing Daniel into the water. Everyone starts cheering and laughing, their smiles turning mischievous as they eye the other people around them. You and Charles look at each other and grin as you get up and start running to the other side of the boat. 

Charles charges toward Pierre and with a yelp, they both crash into the water. You approach Carlos and he turns around with his hands already out to defend himself.

“Amor, no. Don’t do it,” his voice slightly panicked. He eyes the cold blue water and looks at you sporting a cheeky smile.

“What?” you say innocently. “I can’t give my boyfriend a hug?”

You lunge for him but he quickly moves out of the way. The two of you dance around each other playing a cat-and-mouse game. Ultimately, you manage to shove him off the deck but not before he catches your hand and pulls you in. The shrieks turn to laughter as you and the others splash around in the ocean. The contrast between the scorching sun and the cold water became a comfortable medium so you and Carlos decide to stay in and float for a while. The others went back into the yacht but since the sea was relatively calm, you thought you couldn't waste this opportunity to relax in the water.

Carlos lets out a sigh of contentment.

To you, the cold water was especially relaxing since every single muscle in your body was still screaming. A couple of days ago, you had gotten a podium for P3 in Hungary and that race had depleted all your energy. You were racing hard the last 10 laps of the race. George was right behind and the two of you got into some very intense battles but in the end, it was you who was spraying champagne onto Lewis and Max.

“I told you the water would feel nice,” you say, poking him on his side. 

You’re both staring at the clouds and blue sky but you don’t have to look to know that he was grinning ear-to-ear. He reaches for your hand and tangles his fingers with yours, ensuring you don’t drift away from him. You feel like you’re floating toward the sky, the only thing tethering you to Earth is Carlos’s dependable and firm grip. Sometimes you think about what might have happened if you chose not to forgive Carlos. You shiver just thinking about it. Maybe you wouldn’t have gotten into an accident or it could’ve been worse and resulted in permanent injuries or death. All you know is that Carlos is the love of your life and you would do it all over again even if it meant it would end in heartache. The thing is, you don’t think you ever have to worry about that. The universe has given you the perfect partner and despite any upcoming hardships, you know that you belong to each other and nothing will ever change that.

 The two of you enjoyed each other's company in silence until the water became too cold and you needed to get back on the yacht. Carlos helps you up onto the deck and head straight to the outdoor dining area. Everyone is already helping themselves to the food so you sit down and wait because Carlos insisted that he would make your plate for you. Lando teased you relentlessly but you just shrugged. Your boyfriend was excessive when it comes to taking care of you, he knows you could always make your coffee or grab a jacket if you’re cold but whenever you are with him, you barely lift a finger. Of course, you protest whenever he does this but he loves to spoil you so you let him.

Later that day after the sunset and the boat had docked in Monte Carlo, you, the other driver, and their girlfriends were pre-gaming in the lounge area. Everyone was dressed to the nines because you were going to the club and celebrating Max’s win and your third podium. Lily and Carmen compliment the emerald green cocktail dress and you grin when you tell them that Carlos had gifted it to you. This then leads to all the girlfriends scolding their partners for never gifting them a dress to their taste. The boys start hounding you about what kind of gifts you’ve given to Carlos and they are silenced when he flashes his watch you had gotten for him for his win in Silverstone. 

You sidle up to Carlos while his fingers glide over the silk and rest on your hip. Looking up, Carlos smirks down at you as your friends loudly squabble about who has the best sense of style. Everyone was throwing tipsy insults at each other, but it was all part of the banter. Carlos kisses the side of your head making you smile as laughter bubbles out. You wrap your arms around him and inhale the citrus and sandalwood. Feeling his gaze, you look up to see his dark brown eyes looking at you in pure adoration. Placing a hand on the side of his face, you pull him towards you and press a kiss on his lips. 

Here you were in a beautiful dress with the man of your dreams in your arms. You were performing well in the highest level of motorsport breaking records and boundaries for other women out there. A year ago, you were so focused on your work that every single thought was about becoming a world champion or getting as far up the grid as you can. You had to work harder than the boys just to prove that you belonged in this sport just as much as they did. Now that you’ve proven yourself, it makes that fire within you burn brighter. You want to be the best, you want to break records and show the world that you have what it takes to dominate the sport. It was strange to be competing with your boyfriend but it makes you better, some would even say ruthless. This is why you and Carlos work so well together, you teach him to enjoy and savor life while he helps you keep that laser focus on your goals.

You were now leaning against Carlos’s chest with his strong arms holding you close to him. His body gives you warmth as a cool sea breeze brushes past you. As the two of you admired the twinkling lights of Monte-Carlo at night, you can’t think of a better person to spend the rest of your life with.

---

Thank you for all the love. Feel free to send fic requests, I'm itching to write about the other drivers!

Tagged: @oyesmendes, @forzaferraris, @harley-sunday, @thatoneidiot16, @haterpenny, @mysticalnightenthusiast, @laura-naruto-fan1998, @helluvahazelnut, @starjane312, @thatchickwiththecamera, @sticksdoesart, @xscorpioxmoon, @sanne-p, @idkiwantchocolatee , @ruledchaos, @callmequeenbeee, @nochillnel, @dr3lover, @urbankaite2, @justharrysworld, @ohthemisssery, @zoobabystation, @fangirlingcontent-blog, @dan3avacado, @compulsiveshit, @iamasimpingh0e, @inurdreamms, @kodzuskook, @imsoconfused2903, @urbankaite2, @nsprinz, @loveofmylife12 , @capela-miranda, @organasith, @c0k3z3r0na, @thelightnessofthebeing @verstfosi, @glitterquadricorn, @bloomingpresent, @troybolton-14, @vio111a, @marvelousmendess, @bbbbruins, @itssherlockedontheinside, @secretlysoft444,

[roxyteal]

I swear to GOD mobile loves doing this thing where instead of saving an existing draft, "Save" means "I'm gonna post this whether you like it or not". Jesus fuck

Anyway I guess y'all are about to get some stuff about Imnever (WTTW) early. Sigh

Also contains WTTW spoilers but in a B-plot kinda way

He lives in an otherwise uninhabited area that resembles a forest with a creek. He likes the nature and seclusion. His school was modified into a traditional Japanese house, with a garden and everything (holy shit). There's still a lot of yellow, however. It is about a ten minute walk to the city area

Viktor has asked him to move so developments can happen but was refused several times. Even to a point of protest by literally sitting in the garden and not leaving. Eventually Viktor decided that fighting him on this wasn't worth it and left him alone

He finds Billy "cold" and "hard to read", and thus doesn't trust him

He is a Rare Snacks Enthusiast, or so he claims. But really he's just a Snacks Enthusiast

He also appreciates the little things in life, such as a snowflake landing on a bird's cheek or seeing slivers of blue sky on a cloudy day. And also he believes that sleeping for rest is good for mental health (unproven for AIs such as himself, possibly just a placebo)

As mentioned in the Joe 5 post, he is an animator by trade, but teaches art at Baldina's school. What hasn't been said is that it's not coincidence. The two have history together, similar to Text and Lady Blossom's original circumstances

They are best friends who vowed to meet up at the Webspace together, but a mishap caused Baldina to enter first, Imnever eventually making it roughly two months later

Anyway by animator, I am of course referring to 3D animation. He makes them in his free time

In fact, he has Animation Powers. Fastforwarding or rewinding, pause, play, shuffle or loop frames. Requires physical contact with the subject to initiate, but is automatic on himself. Lasts only a brief period, though (fifteen seconds at most), and even shorter if said subject is particularly resistent

So even if he held onto Alex the whole time, he would still break free quickly...

Was injured in the Incident, via a non-lethal stab in the shoulder. He was already too drained to rewind it. But he has long-since recovered, don't worry

Another friend and colleague he knows is Dave 46, the algebra teacher (of course). He always tried getting Imnever to be a little more assertive, but it usually never worked

He left with the other staff for the Yellowstone National Park field trip, while Joe and 46 stayed behind. Joe was to be a lookout, while 46's reason was a mystery. Of course, later on, it all became clear and Baldina fired 46 for coup participation. Imnever has heard him out after the fact, and remains his friend

Meanwhile he asks what Joe thinks about all this and he's just like "i never want to talk about daves ever again". Oh yeah... He saw them flying to Infinity School. He called Baldina and said that "Hell must've froze over because the Daves are rioting". Understandable, have a good day

Still, he's trying to pass on what he knows to Baldina in hopes of reinstating 46. Unsuccessful thus far. Maybe he could have a hearing? Baldina is reluctant

Some other things would go here but the draft posted early so sorry I don't have anything else for you THANKS MOBILE!!!

[marshallpupfan]

Marshall Merchandise Update!

Got some interesting new additions for my collection to show off today! Eventually, I need to show everything off again... as soon as I get things organized again. I still have items I bought from early last year that I still haven't found a spot for yet. I've been slacking! lol

First off, this lapel pin... being graciously held up by Wolf O'Donnell. There's probably a "can't let you do that" joke in here somewhere, but I can't think of any right off hand. 😅

This was actually sent to me by a friend, who recently paid a visit to Nickelodeon Universe (an indoor theme park). While she was there, she seen this and got it for me, hoping it was something I didn't have. Fortunately, it wasn't! A fine item for my collection, indeed! She'll likely see this post later, so if you're reading this, thank you again!

Actually, I believe she also went a year or two ago and managed to find the Meet & Greet Marshall wandering around. She even got a picture & video with him, too. I was quite envious! 😄

Next, this "magic towel" thing. It's also being held up by another wolf - this time, it's Wolf Link, from "The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess". Can you tell I'm a bit of a Nintendo gamer? lol

Anyhoo, I was just doing some shopping with my mother in a dollar store when I happened to stumble upon this. It was only $1.25, so... why not get it? The artwork isn't the best, but hey, I still like it.

Next, one of those "Good 2 Grow" snack containers! Actually, funny story about this one. I was at a gas station, not expecting to see anything pertaining to PAW Patrol, when I seen one of these that someone left at the front near the cashier. However...

It was actually one of Zuma, which surprised me, since they usually pass him up to focus on the main four. I meant to post about it on Twitter/X, but like usual, I forgot. In any case, I decided to track one down, and I soon found one of Marshall at Walmart. It was the last one, too! Unless I'm mistaken, they also had one of Liberty, so I guess they went beyond just the six original pups this time. Nice!

As you might recall, we've actually seen products like this before, about a year or two ago. Back then, it was just the pups in their regular outfits. This time, they went with a superhero theme, no doubt due to The Mighty Movie. I'm not sure why they went with Super Paws and not the Mighty Movie outfits, but maybe these were easier to mold. Who knows, but hey, I quite like it when older outfits get brought back, instead of them getting forgotten in the sands of time.

I just wish we could see THIS outfit again someday. It had a brief reappearance in that "Mighty Pups Save Adventure Bay" video game, but that's it so far. Sadly, at this point, I doubt we'll ever see it again.

Er... guess I got a little distracted here, sorry!

Last, and absolutely not least, is this brand new item! Something I knew about for many months and couldn't wait to get a hold of one for myself! It's "Storytime with Marshall" by Leap Frog!

(In hindsight, taking these pictures in front of my monitor may not have been the best idea. Hopefully they're not too hard to see. 😅)

This thing is legitimately super awesome! They really got his likeness down so well here! I mean, seriously, just look at it! It's so cute! It's easily one of the best pieces of merch I've got in my collection now!

According to the box, it can do quite a lot. It includes 40+ stories, which I assume are based on various episodes (I haven't listened to them yet, but I also assume they focus on different pups, going by the buttons on the front... yeah, it's a shame there's no Rocky or Zuma again, I know). It has a sleep timer, to help lull the little ones to sleep at night before shutting off and all that. Additionally, it teaches "core learning skills" or something, whatever that means. That's cool and all, but of course, for me, I just wanted it because I absolutely love how it looks. It'll look great on one of my shelves! lol

I'll admit, I'm glad this came out before the new animation style got applied. While I like Marshall's updated season 11 look so far (I might make a separate post about that later), his original design is still my #1 favorite. A part of me hopes to keep collecting more merchandise of THIS Marshall, but I know that, by next year, they'll probably retire this design and start using the new one, permanently. Guess I'll enjoy it while it lasts. 😅

And that's all for now! I currently have another item coming in the mail; Marshall's new Rescue Wheels big wheel vehicle + figurine. It's been delayed, but it's supposed to show up at some point next week. Hopefully, the remaining Rescue Wheels merchandise will show up in stores soon enough, and I'll be able to show them all off soon. I might also have to buy a Boomer figurine, too. lol

[barmadumet]

💐 happy Valentine ❤️

Thank you so SO much! You have no idea how thankful I am for sweet anon messages today. It’s been a rough one.

I am finally home; I had stayed with my parents a few nights helping my mom take care of my dad post triple bypass surgery. It was very hard to leave. Earlier today, we had him up and moving, and he blacked out and fell.

I am so glad I was there; I was able to help my mom brace him and get him safely to the floor, so we could wait for paramedics to arrive.

I am so drained, physically and emotionally. It’s hard to believe two weeks ago, I was just arriving in Orlando and looking forward to a fun weekend. Life has been so chaotic and stressful since then, going back and forth from state to state and lacking sleep from all the worry. Time is quickly and frightfully passing me by.

The most challenging part about this is the distance my parents have created between us. Many of you know the background… For 35 years, my parents were literally my best friends. Then, about 21 months ago, they decided to move away. The fact that they are across state lines now, and no longer a 3 minute drive from my house, has made this so much more difficult. And unfortunately the distance these last almost 2 years, isn’t just physical. We aren’t the family we once were. It’s complicated and strained. And every day I still have to fight the feelings of abandonment and rejection - that worthless feeling that tells me I never truly mattered to them the way I once thought.

More than ever, I am so incredibly grateful for everyone here. You guys give me the strength to go on when I so often feel like I have nothing left after so many impactful losses in such a short span of time.

Happy Palentines Day ❤️ I wish I could give each and every one of you a big hug AND a grand box of chocolates and cuddly teddy bear! (Bear n shit lol) 🍫 💝 🐻

Love you all so much 💘

[cpcwiki]

⚠ WIKI AD INCOMING ⚠

Hi, everyone! @mechanical-clown here on a new blog! That's right, it's the Real Official CPC Wiki Social Media Account here!! B) Unfortunately I do not have good news to deliver

It's been a hot minute since my last ad and I do want you all to know I'm still sorry for doing this. Unfortunately, again, how bad I feel making another ad is outweighed by how much the wiki needs more help. I've been feeling especially desperate lately because of the fact that CPC is ending soon, and there are many tasks that will be made harder if it's put on daily pass. So, in my cry for effort to get help, here's an explanation of what I believe is our biggest issue and a rundown of things that currently need to be done! Again I am sorry. This could take a while

If you were fortunate enough to not have seen this post last time, the Cursed Princess (Club) Wiki needs help if it wants to be complete any time soon. Kind of a lot of it. As we all know, cpcblr's very active and prolific in content and the wiki's typically... not. To seriously get into this, the only three active editors in the past month or two have been me, @the-neighbors-kid (aka cursed-princess-club), and Ama (not sure if she wants to be tagged but we all know her!). Shoutout to you two because you are actually the best thank you I love you /pl <3

Anyways, there are already a lot of things we need to do to fix up the wiki. Thankfully, accessing any episode for any information you'd like is easy! And it will continue to be that easy after CPC ends, because Webtoon doesn't feel the need to limit how many episodes a person can view, right? Right? ...Yeah, so, uh, daily pass exists.

As of the time I'm writing this, there are ~10 episodes left in CPC (forgot the exact number lol). Assuming there are no hiatuses, that's only 10 more weeks, or 2 and a half months - and that's pretty soon! While there is a chance that CPC might not have daily pass after it ends, it's a small one. And, to me, that sounds like a huge problem!! If CPC is put on daily pass, accessing episodes will become much more difficult. Looking for a certain character's appearances, adding images, even just finding a single reference - it'll take a day to unlock the needed episode, and that episode will be gone in 2 weeks. The best solution to this problem would probably be to just use physical copies of CPC to find things, but those aren't available to everyone.

And adding images with daily pass episodes? As a reminder, screenshotting while viewing an episode on daily pass is taken as a sign of piracy. Screenshotting, the way we get images for the wiki. I've tried poring through Webtoon's terms of use to find some answer about whether publicly posting such screenshotted images would be illegal, but there's no mention of daily pass, and the text is so dense it's hard for me to tell. (I want to say I'll take a second look at it sometime, but that's probably just going to go into my list of permanently-unfinished priorities. I doubt the physical copies would be a good alternative to screenshots, either.) Regardless, I don't want to take any chances with the law, or see however Webtoon would punish us on the chance they find our frightening screenshots. Thus, another top priority of mine is to add more images and complete more galleries before CPC ends.

Oh, yeah, and that's barely even scratching the surface! Here's more stuff we need to do, presented in an appealing (classic Mocha iykyk) bulleted list:

A major thing is filling in episode pages. Episodes 40-around 110 are basically blank - no synopsis, character list, summary, or extra information. This is the task that would likely be least burdened by the addition of daily pass, but in my opinion, it's still of the absolute highest priority.

Galleries, which display images of characters, locations, or episodes. While not generally that important, I do think it'd be a good idea to fill out mostly empty ones now - you know, since taking screenshots of CPC may become illegal in the future! Most characters have a good amount of images on their pages, thankfully (the pastel sisters have so many they were the first to get separate gallery pages); some, including Jack and Leland, have very few. Episode pages and locations often have way less, though those aren’t as important

Relationship sections for a number of characters. These involve write about characters’ relationships, though in a way that mainly describes their interactions throughout the episodes without expressing any specific opinions. Some major sections that need to be written/updated include Jamie and Leopold; Jolie and Nell; Leland and really everyone on his page but especially Jack; Jack and Lilyth; Suzanna and Lance/Lorena; the Plaid Princes with each other; and more! Many more!

History sections for a number of characters. In a similar vein to relationship sections, these just detail a character’s appearances in the story, as well as their past or other mentions of them. Examples of (mostly - Isolde's isn't fully updated yet) completed history sections include Whitney’s, Isolde’s, and Monika’s! Examples of incomplete sections include virtually everyone else’s.

You might be wondering why I, a wiki admin (in case I haven't said it enough) am not doing any of these things! That’s because I'm neglectful and pretty bad at my job. I will not sugarcoat that part anymore. As much as I love the wiki (it's where I met my best friend after all, and while I'm writing this they just went offline so he can get fucked /j) I don't have motivation to work on it very often. Really, I don't have motivation to work on much nowadays! Ama's been doing the virtually thankless job of keeping the wiki up for the past couple months, and I've been mostly absent. The wiki is only remotely as active as cpcblr because of her. I feel terrible about it, but I'd rather be writing this 9-paragraph cry for help than editing, so, uh... yeah this is a public apology to Ama. I am so sorry. I know this isn't very professional but I'm incapable of being professional about the wiki tbh

TL;DR: As CPC is ending soon, the impending threat of daily pass could take away the ability to look at episodes whenever you want, which would make wiki editing much harder. We seriously need editors to join us in finishing the wiki. Please at least consider helping us!! Any way you can is appreciated - even if you can only make very few edits, I'll be immensely grateful for your support :)

If you have any questions about anything wiki-related, contact me!! My Discord's at musicitself, and you can also always DM me on here! And here's an invite to our wiki Discord server, too!! Of course, you don't have to become a wiki editor to join, but (as was the point of this entire post) I would really really REALLY love if you did. Thank you so much for reading this long, and have a great day!