#it wont be perfect but i can TRY even if trying is really really scary

[acaciapines]

guys what if i told you ive been thinking about dess and actually i think dess/chara might be able to work out in the drkau...like ive been doing some thinking into dess and her reasons and why she does what she does and how she cares about people and im starting to nail down the role i want asriel to play, and. and.

guys i think dess is actually going to be able to change. i think dess figures out how to change but asriel never does....

[kaivenom]

Hi, I really love your writing about one piece dilfs, it's just so good, since it's Halloween can we get one with fem reader who dresses up as succubus and tries seducing them?

One Piece Dilfs with a reader who dresses up as a Succubus for Halloween and tries to seduce them

Characters: Mihawk, Doflamingo, Crocodile, Smoker,Shanks.

A/N: I hope everyone had a good Halloween, here is the other part of the Halloween themed requests.

Masterlist

Dracule Mihawk

You dressed up and surprised him on the bedroom.

Before that day you said that since halloween is today and the castle is already always scary, that you could do something more.

He just nodded and let you try.

So when you appeared on the door with that outfit and with a little sexy dance to some old goth song.

He felt excited, really excited... gothic things make him go hard but seeing you in that outfit with that sparkle that you know he will love, he just got crazy.

But he also wanted to see how much will you do.

He wont bend to you so easily.

A little dance, a couple of smirks and go to bed to sit on his lap.

"What is your plan now?" he said, almost smiling to your attempts.

"I was trying to seduce you. I succeded?" he suddently fliped you around, now him being on top.

"Of course, like always, now its my turn."

Donquixote Doflamingo

I am 90% sure that you both had planned it, like coordinating or something. The only braincell you both had, connected somehow, if its not mentally then its verbally.

So, when you showed up with the costume and him with his horns and red tail, you both were turned on instantly by the other.

But you wanted to make him wait, cause you know that the more time it passes, the more that he will desire you.

So you did, until he saw you getting really close to one person and he went nuts.

He just got so jelaous that the appeared and kicked the person out (with a literal kick) and grabbed you to the throne room.

He left you on the floor and go sitting on his precious throne.

"I am the king of hell and you are a succubus, dont forget who is your king and owner then. Now do your job with the one who will apreciate it and who can punish you if you get difficult."

You smiled, knowing that you get what you wanted and started to approach him.

Sr. Crocodile

He swore it has to be the first time he choked with a cigarrette.

Your figure, the costume, how it suits you like that and how you entered his office only with a robe just to unpack yourself like the gift you are.

He sat there on his office chair, wishing that no one entered to see you dropping the rope and see you sat on his lap.

He made a sign for you to wait a second and he took the office phone to call the secretary.

"I dont want anybody to enter the office or disturb me, i have important manners." even if he didnt say it out loud, the secretary know what he meant.

You finally sat and took his cigarrette out of his mouth, thing you know it gets him really turned on.

"Why do i get this amazing view?"

"Cause it halloween."

"And you thought this would scare me?" he asked with sarcasm and a laugh.

"I want you to come to the dark side, with me."

"That sounds perfect."

Smoker

He chocked, he saw heaven, came back and died again.

When you suggested dressing as angel and devil, he tought it was childish, like a teenagers idea.

So he dressed as an angel and you should dress as the devil.

What he didnt expected it's that you dressed up especifically as a succubus and that made him feral.

Embarrased about it but feral.

The breakign point is when you both arrived at marines office, where you met your friends and he met his.

Everyone of his colleagues was congratulating him for making his girlfriend look like a model, like it was his idea.

On the inside, he was really really embarrased cause it wasn't his idea, it was yours, and you are the one who has him wrapped around your finger.

He spent the rest of the night looking at you from the distance, admiring your body and features.

"So, my love, are your damm coworkers stoping of treating me like an object?"

"I am sorry for that." he said while embracing you on a hug, "But you are the object of my desires so... i want us to come back to the house, please." he said with a whine and you couldn't help but let it be, even with the cheers of his colleagues on the background.

Akagami Shanks

You warned him about this but he laughed saying you dont have the guts.

So, when halloween came and all the crew was partying, you showed up with your outfit.

He saw you from across the room and spilled all the beer he had on his mouth, that was now hanging down to the point of breaking his jaw.

You smiled victoriously at him and went to the dance floor, instantly starting to move your body seductively to the rythm of the music.

He coudln't resist to getting behind you and wrap his arms around your hips.

"I didnt expect you to do this, i would have to keep quiet next time." you laughed and pressed yourself against him more. "I love when you play dirty... maybe i can see your full game back in the ship."

He bit your neck and then your ear and that was the sign to go back and have another type of fun.

[starillusion13]

HEY! I saw your thirst ask is open but I wanted to send you a request. Okay, anyways what do you think--who will be more dominant between Jeno & Jaemin? If you are in a relationship with both at once. I am curious about it pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeee

First of all This is a dominant duo tho...

Okay so if we imagine these two as the ones you met at the university ground when you were heart-broken because of the sudden news of your boyfriend cheating on you. It wasn't too surprising for you because the way he was ignorant of you, it was as if only you who was trying hard to keep it strong but somehow it crashed in the end.

"y/n, why are you here alone?" of course Jaemin would be the one to have a concern visible on his face and would approach you, with Jeno closely trailing behind him and both of their gazes fixed on your crying form.

and if you hesitate to reply then the other would be repeating the same question with a dark look, "he asked you something so you better reply."

after explaining to them everything, they wont leave your side for the time being, or maybe for the following few days. you have noticed it before that they would always be around whenever there is a little misfortunate events in your life and many doubt that maybe you are sleeping around with them. the rumors frustrates you a lot but them--they enjoy it a lot.

now that you don't have a bf, mostly to their advantage. they are happily hanging out with you more. keeping an eye on you where you are going or with whom are talking to, also always popping out of nowhere to ask if you are okay or there's something bothering you. they would make you feel like a reliable on them.

cuddles with Jaemin is a daily dose for your exhausted day but when Jeno welcoming you in a warm hug, it's as if you have seen a heaven in reality.

but there's something to notice...

Jaemin is the kind and adorable sweetheart of the campus. his bunny smile with cute sparkling eyes makes others drool over him but the buff body with those tight muscles hiding beneath his hoodies and t-shirts are often left unnoticed by his soft look. he has a flirty personality and with a click, everyone will be in a queue for him but in his mind, it's only you---always you. smirk directed towards them is actually on the thoughts flashing in front of his eyes, how to break you down and to what limit he can go until you are begging to him. he would groan to himself with the thoughts of you squirming and shaking with begging him to stop. his sweet smile with those contrast words and actions.

"Oh baby, you are done with this? come on. I know you can do it better. if you were really done then you would have said the word already." even if has made you come a lot of times but he will still be unsatisfied and proceed to do his sweet tortures on you.

Jeno is just the opposite to him in appearance. he is scary, he doesn't give a fuck about others, but yeah sometimes you will find him giving threats and ending with the a eye smile...literally mocking at them. his strong muscled body lining with popping veins is always on display and it's normal to say he is scary with the dark demeanor. his dark eyes on you with his strong grip on your wrist really scares you off sometimes but then suddenly he will direct a eye-smile to you. if he wants you under him, he knows he will get you easily without even trying a little coz it's easy for him to make you weak under him. you are nothing against his whole personality. his words and actions are a perfect match.

"look at you, begging for what? didn't think before going against me that it won't end up well...and it's good not for you but fantastic for me." oh he would also make Jaemin watch you both how you are literally folding into half.

but don't get fooled by their cover...

Jaemin might can be a sweetheart outside but to let you know, even Jeno gets surprised with his thoughts on how to have you. no one not even you who is apparently their girlfriend can't even even imagine who is likely to do the most wild things. of course the first thought that would come across your mind is Jeno might be the one but to your surprise, Jaemin is the one to end something completely.

If you are trying to control them them, buckle your seatbelt because even if Jaemin allows you to have control over him for a night, Jeno would never....NEVER he will let you believe that you can control him.

he will instantly make you on your knees and buries himself deep inside your throat, "say it again. maybe let me see you try again." his dark and furious eyes watching how tears falling from your eyes and how badly you are shaking when he is thrusting deep in your every hole. THE DOMINANT OF THE DUO.

but Jaemin will let you experience your new side and Jeno would tsk beside you. The sweet boy will guide you and ask your list of fantasies unlike the other who just has a thought--you have to like everything he will give you. what a freak! hush he might can hear you.

They will follow your every moves and once they notice that you are nothing except a sub to them. wide dirty smirks display across their face and would fuck you unless you are falling unconscious. but they are soft romantics too, would fill you with lots of gifts and never leave a chance to show you off to others. Jaemin might appear as if he is not bothered someone is flirting with you but Jeno will stare deeply into them to scare them off.

you know getting on Jeno's worst side is a hell for you but getting on Jaemin's worst side means you are on a long ass ride.

"Jaemin, how should we start?"

he will smile and cup your face, "maybe start with tying her up...and then we can have it in our way."

you are not escaping them in this life.

Afterall they were the one to make your boyfriend break up with you in the first place so that they will gain your trust easily. come on, otherwise they would have locked you up anyways for themselves.

[Believe me JENO is really really really a dominant one. HE IS AN ALPHA...and JAEMIN is trying to hide his own ALPHA side not to scare you off]

[wazzappp]

Alrighty my dudes buckle up

GHOST RIDER D&D AU

also WOE. ART STYLE CHANGE BE UPON YE.

First things first thank you to my beloved mutual @moosemonstrous, who was basically the brains behind the operation I basically just wanted an excuse to draw tiefling Robbie and then got smacked in the face with an awesome story way beyond what I had ever thought of with KILLER fucking lore to match <3.

While I usually like to start with Robbie when introducing an AU, we're going to unfortunately have to start with Eli. A man who fucked up so monumentally that the kinda sorta god he's supposed to be serving went 'Bitch??? How about NO.' and humbled him faster than my DM can say 'roll perception'.

Ok I'm getting ahead of myself. Eli is pretty much the same personality wise as he is in canon. Insecure and desperate for power/control. He grew up surviving with Beto by doing jobs for the Myriad crime syndicate. Somewhere along the way he started serving his patron, Desirat, the twilight phoenix, in exchange for her power.

Im just going to directly quote what moose said about Desirat cause its phrased WONDERFULLY:

"Desirat, The Twilight Phoenix - companion and mount of Asmodeus during an ancient war, was torn from her master and captured by uppity mages. They were eventually killed, but she remained chained under a mountain, creating weird thermal phenomena in the area. Her sanity fractured in isolation so she thinks herself divine, and she lends through dreams and visions to those who 'carry a seed of fiery vengeance'. She now speaks to the minds of those who lie spurned and angry at night, calling them to unlock their inner flame and let Desirat aid them in their vengeance."

Desirat chose Eli as her champion to free her. She believed his faults would make him easy to manipulate for her purposes.

But eventually Beto wanted to settle down, and Eli refused to (to quote moose) 'Stop that warlock bullshit that EVERYONE SAID will get him in trouble'. And the brothers separate. During that time, Eli gets it in his head that he can steal more power from her by becoming a Litch. Great! In order to become a Litch he needs to have the most important person to him engage in a willing life sacrifice. Not great.

So he finds Beto and tries to get him to oblige to his sacrifice, and while there might have been a time where Beto might have laid down his life for his brother, he wont anymore. He has a family now. People who rely on him who AREN'T Eli. Unfortunatly, Eli is PISSED by this and kills Beto even though he isn't a willing sacrifice. Eli figures 'Whose really gonna care? A life is a life right?'

DESIRAT cares. She basically obliterates Eli on the spot and stores his lifeforce for later purposes.

(all stat sheets curtosy of the great Moose. Also I feel obligated to mention there was a scary moment during the art process where Eli looked like a beautiful butch lesbian. Horrifying.)

After Eli's spiritual, physical, and magical bitch slap, Desirat starts looking down his bloodline for a NEW champion. Lucky her, Robbie is RIGHT THERE. Protective of his brother, a strong sense of justice even from a young age, a hatred of when things aren't fair; he's PERFECT. She has plans for this one. Eli was a good test run. But she has IMPROVEMENTS planned for Robbie.

So Desirat waits until Robbie is old enough and strong enough to serve her purposes. In that time, Julianna goes out adventuring to get more coin so she can pay for Gabe's treatments of Greater Restoration and just. General food and water and general supplies. But she doesn't come back. She was responsible though and hired someone who was willing to take what she could offer to take care of the boys. Gabe still believes that she's still out there and trying to come back to them. Robbie thinks she's either bailed on them for a life of adventure or dead.

Around when Robbie turns 18, Desirat puts her plans into effect. Seeing as tieflings carry innate magical abilities (most commonly thaumaturgy, hellish rebuke, and darkness) it would be far more advantageous for her champion to be a tiefling than human. In the span of about 4 months, Robbie goes through a rather drastic transformation.

His fingernails harden, then blacken, then sharpen. Awful pressure builds in his skull that is only relived when the beginnings of horns break through his skin. A similar process begins with a lump forming at his tail bone and eventually bursting out into a long pointed tail. His canine teeth fall out and grow back in sharper and longer. His eyes cloud over to black and yellow, all the while his skin reddens and forms hard ridges on his arms, ribs and spine.

To say this is disorienting and painful is an understatement. Not to mention how it changes how the other people around the village look at him (not to mention how it changes how he looks at himself). Even though the stigma around tieflings isn't as strong as it once was, it eventually causes Robbie to be out of a job. So he decides to sell the house, pack up his things, prepare schooling money for his brother and move to the city where more opportunities will hopefully await.

GABE!!! THE LITTLE ADHGH. Idk why but I got extreme cute aggression when drawing this version of him fdjkslaf.

Gabe still has CP like he does in canon, but with the magical advantages of ✨Greater Restoration✨ he can generally function pretty well. He still gets tired sometimes though, so he carries around a walking staff as an aid just in case he needs one (also he can go whack whack. at least thats what Robbie tells him when he gets a little self conscious carrying it around).

Robbie has saved up enough money for Gabe to get a months worth of schooling at the Dawn Father Chantry in the city so he can learn to cast Greater Restoration on himself. Gabe's recent growth spurt has been causing him to need more and more frequent healings, and the Chantry in their home village of Hill Rock has been less and less obliging as of late (partially due to Robbies recent uh... condition. not that anyone would dare say it to his face of course).

Some extra fun doodles with expressions and thinking about how Desirat might look and interact with Robbie. I love when gods have a kind of twisted love for their special chosen people (plus some fun transformation horror cause its ✨me✨ were talking about what did you expect).

Also I really REALLY liked that top left sketch and got the rendering itch so I had some fun and painted it in.

Theres a whole fuckin. Second post to this au all lined up cause Moose when HAM on this. But its gonna take some more character designs so I'll need just a little time. but this will not be the last you see of this lol I promise <3

[baby-xemnas]

I see Law is depicted as being really popular with human women (even though he's not interested in them), but imagine a situation where the hot human girl doesn't care for Law but simps for Bepo instead >:)

read this ask before bed yesterday and thinking up a scene distracted me from trying to fall asleep xD

i picture a scene at the club, of course it was a penguin and shachi's idea to go and lawbepo only went to drink and chill - but this one had a dance floor

Halfway through the night of those chuckles fumbling every woman in sight, a particularly cute pop song comes on and Law tells Bepo "do you want to dance?"

Bepo: "what? captain, you'll dance with me?? 😳😳😳😳"

Law: Of course not, i'm staying where i am, i have a perfect view of the dance floor from here, you can go (Law did plan this when they came in and he saw the club layout)

Bepo is a bit disappointed but he goes and when he turns around from the edge of the dance floor and meets eyes with Law across the room, his heart skips a beat- being watched by Captain feels like some type of no-contact play. Bepo is tense for awhile until he finally relaxes and has fun (Law smiles noticing Bepo getting used to him staring ♥)

The simp sees Bepo right away and of course she would be attracted to his size (its the first thing you see, who can blame her) and would come up and ask his name to which Bepo would answer but hed be a bit thrown off like why are you talking to me i dont care

Law does not get his ass up, he just watches Bepo be awkward, he wont rescue him even if Bepo very obviously turns to look at him (and the girl follows his gaze) lol bepo looks like a kid searching for their parent in a scary situation except no thats his dom and a husband

bepo fumbles her spectacularly showing his disinterest/being rude lol, Law really wouldnt want to rescue him.

however when ofc Bepo says sorry and excuse me he runs back to the table to Law, Law ofc teases him like "she was pretty" and Bepo would go on about how WHAT NO I DONT CARE NO CAPTAIN DONT SAY THESE THINGS IM NOT INTERESTED IN ANYBODY WHY WOULD I BE!!!! 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

[luci-is-a-bitch-x3x]

Obey Me! Beel & Belphie with a Goth MC! : basically my thoughts on what the brothers reactions would be, how they would handle having a goth partner, ext.

━☆*:･ﾟ✧✧ ♡ ❀ ♡ ✧━

Welcome to the third part of this adventure! This is the twins reactions separately but their thoughts/feelings may overlap. The characters may not be how you imagine! I apologize for any poor jokes, bad spelling, and terrible grammar. Without further ado, enjoy the content. ♡

━☆*:･ﾟ✧✧ ♡ ❀ ♡ ✧━━☆*:･ﾟ✧✧ ♡ ❀ ♡ ✧━

Goth MC! who does the make up, the white foundation the "crazy" eyeliner, the black/grey or dark color eyeshadow and blush. Classic black or red lipstick with matching nail polish on the Mc's fingers. The saggy looking hair that matches the make up, oh so well. Goth MC! Who has the unkept look, but at second glance you can tell their well kept. At least to some extent. The Mc has raggy, ripped looking outfit but upon closer inspection its clear the outfit is perfectly kept up with. Goth MC! Who has an over extent looking outfit, looking like rags on rags, and the Mc has a dead looking apperance appearing to have risen from the grave. Almost the perfect example of a goth baddie. How will the brothers react?

Beel

When Goth Mc drops into the Devildom, Beel wasn't really concerned. Beel is sweet baby boy nonjudgemental he just doesn't care what others look like or wear. As long as Mc doesn't steal his food or hurt his family, he'd be chill. It might even take him some time to notice Goth Mc's appearance. Pls be patient he's always focused on food. He's the Avatar of Gluttony dude! The first time he meets Mc he doesn't pay attention, instead complains to Lucifer about being hungry. Someone feed the poor bby.

Beel finds Goth Mc's look to be unique. He thinks its cute. He can relate to the fact that some people may find Goth Mc to be scary. People somehow find this giant teddy bear to be scary all the time! Beel isn't threatened or scared by Mc's apperance. He will gladly listen to Goth Mc rant about goth culture or dark things in general while he munches on food. Beel will also gladly accompany Mc to haunted houses as long as he has food. Dont want him to go on a rampage. Beel may raise his eyebrows even jump a little in shock, but hes ultimately a great haunted house partner. He wont leave Mc behind and will even put himself between the thing thats scaring them and Mc.

Dating with Beel is adorable! Beel likes to do Goth Mc's intrests because he likes seeing Mc happy! Beel will gladly watch anytype of horror or scary film with Mc. "I'll be focused on the popcorn anyways." Although Beel is indeed focused on the popcorn. He still takes Mc's intrests seriously, he'll watch the film's and listen to Mc rant about how it was well done or poorly executed. Beel will nod along while Mc rants and occasionally say what parts he liked.

Beel will happily go out places with Goth Mc. He thinks nothing of it, he just wants to go out to eat with someone he cares about. Such a cutie. Beel may be a gentle giant, but he will gladly use his "scary" apperance to make people leave Mc alone. The poor idiot still wants to bully Mc for being goth? Dont worry Mc! Beel's always hungry! "...its bad to eat other demons..? ....i was just trying to protect you Mc..." *sad puppy Beel* Mc! Apologize! Sweet Bby did nothing wrong! Go get him a snack!

Beel doesnt care about apperance so he isnt the best with fashion gifts. However Beel takes gifts seriously and always puts so much thought into them. If he gets something from someone and it remind him of Goth Mc, he won't hesitate to give it to them. Mc might occasionally receive goth gifts from him, but Beel mostly gives them dark colored foods. For example, a black cupcake with a bat or a skeleton. Something sweet and simple like that.

Belphie

When Belphie first meets Mc in general is wack. But we wont talk about that. Goth Mc he'll give a eyebrow raise maybe even a small smirk. Belphie would defiently bully/tease Goth Mc. "...You look more dead than the skeletons inside people's coffins.. *yawn*" dont be fooled, Belphie lives for Goth Mc. Simp! Jk I just feel like belphie would really be into a Goth Mc. Belphie doesn't give a damn what someone wears. Mans can barely stay awake to care. I honestly feel like Belphie has probably been called emo or something similar. Belphie and Mc would defiantly get into playful fights over which one is better, goth or emo. Both are valid ♡

Imagine Goth Mc dating Belphie and then people at R.A.D start calling the two of them the "emo couple" the fights ..mostly playfights.. This could lead to. Like imagine some demon walking up and saying their the emo couple or calling Goth Mc, emo in general.

Goth Mc: "I'm not emo!! Belphie! you're killing my vibe" "...you think I've killed youre vibe?... *yawn* ...we both know i improved you're vibe. ...Who likes Goths anyways. *insert that cocky smirk he gives*" He says all of this playfully he is just a little shit. Just likes to tease and deflect his actual feelings.

Dating with Belphie is playful. Belphie is always teasing Mc, and he expects MC to tease him back. He'll say the rudest comment ever, but the grin on his face tells Mc that hes just playing. Hopefully. Belphie may be playful and he may bully Mc, but hes the only one allowed to bully Mc. Some random demon comes up and trash talks Goth Mc's look well- "..*bored yawn* ....you're just mad that a walking skeleton looks better than you..." Yup. Thats his way of dealing with it. He'll insult them and Mc at the same time. Belphie is a bitch mean so if he doesn't hurt the random demons feelings he'll either put the demon to sleep. If he can't do that he'll just give the demon nightmares.

Belphie doesnt do a lot of activities, he'll just sleep next to Goth Mc as they do their thing. Scary movie? Just dont wake him up by jumping around. Make up? Belphs sleeping on Mc's lap. Weird ritual? Can he still sleep on Mc's lap while they do it? Belphie straight up doesn't care man. Just sit or lay somewhere Mc, its Belphies nap time and he needs his favorite pillow.

Belphie sleeps all the time. So gifts isn't something he just randomly does often. I feel like his gifts would be cute things like goth bed attire. Oh, he was out at the store and saw this black bat plush. No he didn't get it because it reminded him of you, Mc. He got it because its soft and comfortable. Liar. If Belphie gives Mc any other gifts he either oddly found it somewhere or had one of his older siblings get it. Belphies lazy, but that doesn't mean hes not thinking of you, Mc.

━☆*:･ﾟ✧✧ ♡ ❀ ♡ ✧━━☆*:･ﾟ✧✧ ♡ ❀ ♡ ✧━

Thats all for now! Hope you enjoyed babes!!♡ This is not proofread. Feel free to comment or reblog any thoughts or any add ons you have! The side characters reactions will be coming soon. So stay tuned! You matter. You are loved! ‹𝟹

━☆*:･ﾟ✧✧ ♡ ❀ ♡ ✧━

⟡˙⋆Masterlist⋆˙⟡

[frankendykez]

What r ur oc stories about?

OMG HIHI I NEVER HAD SOMEONE OUTSIDE OF MY CURRENT FRIENDS ACTUALLY ASK BEFORE UMMMM OKAY SO. i have 3! main oc stories that i Really care about at the moment but im Deeply fixated on mainly 1 of them but im gonna start with the one ive been liek "promoting" the most in a sense!! under read more cuz im gonna try to exlain all three of them bless. sorry if i seem overly passionate oops i was TRYING to summarise im sorry its so long u rlly dont Have to read All of it

Forgotten Man's Symphony

his (louis manoir) character is basically a spin off from a character mentioned in the novel frankensetin exactly (1) time by name in elizabeth's letter and by far he is the most organised oc of mine cuz we do actually have a clean, understandable summary doc (thought it is a tad bit outdated but its okay). shes like the most Normal narrative-wise i suppose so i'm not exactly sure on how to explain the plot of forgotten man's symphony it's just like??? him ruining his life in front of the reader and then #Healing?? i guess?? the story is an epistolary that starts with louis' Suicide Letter. so like. yeah. BUT!! i suppose i would say his story very much concerns the concept of like identity (including gender and such she would be considred either transfemme/bigender by the modern world but also idfk cuz i made her complicated and confusing on purpose) and also the lack thereof + the negative impact that comes with trying so hard to fit into the societal norms and what people Want you to be but you just Can't be, cutting away bits of yourself to fit through some sort of hole representing the perfect version of you until theres nothing left of Who You Are expect a palatable and small version yk?? and the the endless pursuit of wanting to be loved that leads yourself to changing and changing for people who just wont care or love you for realsies + @rosaniruby 's words "making it even like that so its not YOU who is loving and being loved but the dim visage of a version of you that fits the picture of what society loves; that it's not a love between individuals, it's the love for a society that cannot ever love anything because it was made to hate. and who believes that portrayal of love will not find it and forever be stuck. smth like society loves what it deems as perfect and hates the imperfect, since perfect doesn't exist it can only do the second one. and louis wanted to love perfect victor, hated his own imperfect self. but the perfect victor doesnt exists, and neither does any version of louis."

i like her he's great. sorry if that was less telling u WHAT his story is and more like Explaining the "themes" as theyre called of the story but idrk how to describe nromal stuff so TAKE WHAT U CAN GET!!! anyways,

Domus Carnis: The Transmutation of Guinevere Manor

idk if you're aware but i have a hyperfix on architectural horror and i DON'T MEAN SCARY GHOSTS AND SERIAL ILLERS IN AN ABANDONED HOUSE I MEAN HAUNTED HOUSES THAT ARE ALIVE THAT IS A METAPHOR FOR PTSD FROM CHILDHOOD TRAUMA ETC ETC!! this story By making it started my whole obsession with the House it's crazy... scary even.. (i recommend you watch jacob geller's video essay about houses) i really do like domus carnis but it's. Messy to say the least. i do feel as if i ought to change the time period it's set in to avoid talking about the wars going on in the time period i accidentally set it in without realising but im procrastinating on that rn. it was Suppose to be late 1800s to early 1900s..

in a few simple words: flesh-and-bone made lesbian sex house. does that get your attention yet. bless

domus carnis (which literally means flesh house in latin or something) will be written in the POV of a 40ish year old widowed woman by the name of harriet wren's diary entries, occasionally switching to the POV of her 20-something year old godson percival who is like old timey jake paul and hes like either a journalistt or a radio host depending if i choose to change the time period or not. we follow them after harriet's husband dies of whatever and they find out he has a large property in a foreign country of which they had not known of prior

somewhere in germany there is a house of ex-aristocrats that no longer live there that is Alive. the House becomes alive because it is in a sense "possesed" (not haunted) the ghost of kathryna von guinevere who was the last one to die in the house, who, in life, was incredibly obsessed with The House for reasons that i fear are too long to explain without boring you and going into info pre-story?? anyways, when she "posseses" the house, the materials of the house shift to flesh, blood and bone because it Materially becomes her body. now, it would be hard to accurately label what represents what body part, because it's all strangely jumbled up and isn't like really human anatomy either cuz kathryna Can in fact see inside herself?? anyways whatever. now, the house is now both her body AND her mind. i have taken the phrase "haunted by memories/trauma" and turned it literal. the house IS haunted, but most of the ghosts aren't ghosts, theyre mostly all manifestation of Memory from her life because she actively is replaying the speech and actions of other people IN her mind to process the (typically traumatic) events of which she's seen or experienced. the ghosts CANNOT do as they please because they only exist at all Due to kathryna remembering them in these specific scenes. the hauntings include scenes of people, sounds, and shadows. unless the "scene" has a mirror, you cannot see kathy directly because you are witnessin things through HER eyes, which makes memories from wee childhood interesting because im wondering if i should make the "people" seem wayy bigger than the viewer if stuff is replayed from childhood..

i really like the fact that a lot of this is based on memory because it opens a lot of doors to me when it comes to the appearance of hauntings. my friend showed me this video depicting neurons forgetting how a face looks like, and i feel as if i could use that in the story because well, realistically kathy isnt going to have a Pristine memory cuz she Was just a human before, not to mention the fact shes already suppose to have issues on facial recognition/rememberance (my friend with these sisues suggetsed htis). the alteration of the ghosts' bodies could be fucked with even more if i try to make use and research into the way that people (mostly children) can in fact like.... change the image of something traumatic in their brain and make it less scary bc the brain is trying to protect them? yeah. AND ALSO the fact that a lot of people forgets certain aspects of their trauma due to their brain trying to protect them as well but still have this feeling of Unease when it comes o specific things that they cant explain, i could incorporate this feeling in certain areas of the House, the strange uneasiness. i experience that myself so i hope ill portray it right!!

i Think that's it?? at least that should be the bare bones of the story... i have a pin board tho if u want to check it out!!

The Epinicium

THIS is the stupid fucking thnag thats ruining my entire life rn. i love it i hate it whagever man. THIS ONE ill keep short and simple because im too fucking mentally ill about it to explain in depth without being asked questions

so basically its fantasy world but not like. Completely new high fantasy i very loosely based the countries off of like real countries and stuff bc lazy as shite so its like mid fantasy maybe HOWEVER

basically its set in this world where theres a shit ton of religions and gods and shit and theres three categories of religions (the world is veyr uhnm. Categorical idk): earth, science and the arts. basically the arts religions are the majority and the gods of those religions are called the muses so thats what i'll be calling them from now on. the basic plot of epinicium is about the muses of the music religion declaring that humanity doesnt treat music as "holy enough" anymore and taking it away as a whole (songbirds go extinct as well which is importnat) which also fucks up the other arts religionsdue to the fact that artforms are very connected but they still exist yk and centuries later our main cast attempts to bring it back!!! we have this server with a channel that has the "summary" but its not a real summary its just an already outdated infodump but we are Trying to fill this doc but we're failing really hard but friendship is magic idk.

fin.

anyways thats. pretty much it i think im sorry its too long once again 😭😭 feel free to ask question esp on the epinicium!! id love to hear abt ur ocs btw ive yapped so much oops

[cyanoticfireflies]

Hazbin Hotel - Rewatch Thoughts (Episode 1, Part 3)

I know Adam has his guitar and Alex Brightman voice, but is he an actual rockstar in Heaven?  He’s going on about his gig in his anecdote. 

They talked about how Lilith empowered demon-kind with her songs – but how did Heaven get its groove then?

I’m so fascinated by this because Adam knows who Charlie is.  He knows she’s Lucifer’s daughter, which pretty much makes her Lilith’s daughter (theories in the epilogue, theories in the epilogue) which means that she could have been Adam’s daughter if his first wife hadn’t run off with another guy.  Honestly, considering how immature and spiteful Adam is shown to be later, sitting down and talking to Charlie and having lunch “with” her is reasonably chill behavior on the Adam scale….  I’m kind of getting “that weird uncle that peaked in college” vibes from him.

Starting from about this point is where Lute begins to become more interesting to me than Adam.  We get what he’s like.  But when he’s asking whether a girl would want a “lesser” guy to him, Lute shakes her head, agreeing with him. 

She hasn’t said a word so far, but immediately she’s on Adam’s side – not at all appalled that this guy representing Heaven is acting like this and in agreement with him even.

Lute will remain fascinating to me, just saying that now.

Adam goes into listing what he thinks is “our biggest problem” and knowing what we know about Adam later him possibly having herpes is both amusing and scary.  I’m pretty sure he uses the exorcist army as his own harem.  Maybe that’s why all of them are so angry.

(Yes, I think everyone caught the fourth wall break.)

(We’re not the ones who refuse to go out in public without a mask on, big man.  Well, at least not since COVID numbers went down!)

I really want to find out Niffty’s backstory. 

I’m sure Vivianne already has the whole thing drafted out in her head.  But that complete paralysis when the camera was rolling seemed like a trauma response.  And that’s in a room that has a guy that is frequently raped on camera standing a few feet away from her.  Niffty goes totally dissociative until she hears the word “cut” and the camera beep off.  So, so curious.

(Have some nightmare fuel.)

I feel like working in the film industry Angel would be the perfect person to explain “fix it in post” to Vaggie if she hadn’t bitten his head off.  He literally raises his hands in surrender when she snarls at him, so done with all of their shit.

What room is Vaggie in when she’s editing the commercial?  We know there’s a reasonably better working TV down in the living room since they were watching it at the beginning of episode 4, and that room doesn’t look like hers and Charlie’s room that we see later on.

And why did this seemingly unused room get matching elephant statues for the mantle?

Alastor shows up to be generally unhelpful and kick her while she’s down, as he’s wont to do. 

Alastor’s shadow thing is so interesting to watch.  In some ways, it almost acts like Asmodeus’s extra faces from Helluva Boss, mimicking Alastor’s emotions.  But then other times it acts semi-separately.  Is the shadow thing supposed to be Alastor’s unfiltered id behind his veneer?

(You can actually kind of see a non-psychotic deer form for Alastor when the camera bugs out when Vaggie is trying to video him.  That looks like a deer to everyone else too, right?)

When Alastor has his “this face was made for radio” freakout, he’s missing the X in the middle of his forehead that he always has later, which is just an interesting detail to note.

I also feel like “who or what you are” is something that could come up later on.  We know that Alastor is an aberration in Hell, having powers at levels never before seen from a Sinner.  Either his deal goes back farther than I was suspecting or else he’s been very not-usual from the start.

I feel like what Alastor does here with Vaggie is the first (or second if the pilot is cannon) step along a long road to desensitization.  We make him see two deals in the current timeline in the show – once to not have to fuss with the TV ever again, once for a favor where Charlie “harms no one.” 

He seems to be getting them used to making little, insignificant (or maybe significant, depending on his favor – it was very specifically worded) deals with him.  Like when you try to get close to a stray animal so inch your way towards it one step at a time.  Though in this case Alastor would probably do the biting…

I also feel like it’s very telling that Alastor didn’t bother to offer to do his whole set/costumes/crew thing when Vaggie first asked for help with the commercial.  Only when helping with the commercial was in some way beneficial to him.

Are these dude’s Alastor summons a couple of times other Sinners, or are they just fake, temporary creatures?  Does that mean that Alastor is controlling them or are they equipped with some sort of rudimentary AI that lets them perform the tasks he’s set to them?  If they are other Sinners, Husk and Niffty are out of uniform.  If they aren’t, Angel can probably keep the one he hits on later as a fancy sex toy without many moral implications.

(Alastor should give up being the Radio Demon and give Velvette a run for her money in the fashion industry.  Angel and Vaggie’s outfits in particular are *chef’s kiss*)

I hope Alastor’s closed captions staff are better than Amazon’s, though. 

Also, at some point during the flash back to the hotel, Adam has finished his pile of ribs.  I don’t know how if he never shuts up enough to let someone else get a word in edgewise.

Adam and Lute start talking about the Exterminations, and Lute mentions that she “got a good 275 this year.”  (We’ll be coming back to that number later, by the way.)

Adam seems impressed by this, telling her that was “bad-ass” and giving her a fist bump.  While calling her “danger tits.”  Lute does not, in fact, punch Adam in the face for this.  Again here Lute seems totally on board with Adam’s… Adam-ness.

She seems like some of the girls that I’ve known from school, work, etc that go out clubbing and actually will give the time of day to the guys who wear sunglasses inside and think that negging is a successful way to get women’s attention.  Lute, you are encouraging bad behavior!

But that’s not surprising since Lute is quickly revealed to be a zealot, a fanatic, an extremist. 

She hasn’t just drank the Kool-Aid, she was pouring the fruit punch flavored powder mix into the pitchers for other people to add the water to. 

(Is this because if you, personally, catch an angel making one you de-angel-ify them?

Her belief system is carved in stone, and unfortunately for Charlie and all of Hell that belief system is that Sinners double-dying is not only an acceptable thing but an excellent thing.

Lute does reveal something here that has the potential to become important later: that Lucifer made some kind of arrangement that spares the Hellborn from the exorcisms. 

Vivziepop’s other show “Helluva Boss” focuses a lot more on the Hellborn than Hazbin Hotel does (obviously, with Hazbin being focused on the redemption of Sinners.)

The Hellborn that we see/know/spend time with in Hazbin are going to include: Charlie, Keekee, Razzle, Dazzle, the Egg Boys, Fat Nuggets, and that’s pretty much it.  Everyone else aside from background characters in Hazbin – I may have missed one or two – is an open target.  I guess maybe fallen angels must also be exempt since no one is trying to go after Lucifer himself.

Lute’s words do seem to upset Charlie a bit.  “How little you matter,” she said, and it looked like a hit to Charlie’s battleship.  Which I know Charlie is a bouncy blonde ball of daddy issues at this point, but it really seems like the opposite, doesn’t it?  Like she – and the other Hellborn – were being protected.  Is Charlie upset that the exorcists aren’t coming after her because they can’t, so they don’t really care about (killing) her?  Maybe that’s just Charlie’s guilt for being exempt?

Charlie tries to explain her plans to Adam and Lute, but by this point we all know that she’s not going to succeed, right?  At least her crayon drawings are kind of cute.

“Hell is Forever” sounds like one of the songs that the youth pastors I grew up having to go hang out with every other week (divorced parents, split custody) used to make religion cool to the youngsters. 

Very Skillet, Fireflight, etc.  This ain’t your grandpappy’s religion – except the whole eternal damnation part.  Except I’m pretty sure they would have censored some of the “fucks” to let us have this one.

Adam kind of cuts through all of the divine judgement propaganda to get to the heart of things in the second verse.  This isn’t even about population control or final death or any of that – he and his exterminators just enjoy it.

 Since we find out later that no one else knows about the exterminations, I imagine that the exterminators have to be – up to a certain point, at least – on their best behavior in Heaven.  This kind of makes Extermination Day a bit like “The Purge” for exorcists. 

One day to go nuts and get it all out of their systems.  Frankly, it might be a little bit dangerous for Heaven to stop the extermination; after several thousands of years of having that release valve, if it was suddenly taken away that pressure could go pretty kaboom – and Sera won’t let that kaboom happen anywhere near her Winners.

(Charlie is right.  Where did all of these backup singers come from?  They’re gold, not full monochrome like Lute, so they’re probably not real exorcists they yanked into the meeting room from the lobby.  Adam must have a “give me a posse” button in the Heaven version of the meeting room.)

Adam’s big reveal comes right at the end of the song.  They’re moving the next Extermination Day up to six months instead of a year out.

Who approved this plan?  Did Sera sign off on this?  This seems like really bad population control practice.  The exterminations seem to already be getting worse and worse (Carmilla Carmine says specifically that this most recent extermination was brutal, with approximately 15% of the Sinner population being wiped out.) 

If they increase the pace and severity of exterminations, that’s almost a third of the population each year.

I stopped going to church a long time ago, but that number seems interesting…

Revelation 9:15: “And the four angels, who had been prepared for the hour and day and month and year, were released, so that they would kill a third of mankind.”

Revelation 9:18: “By these three plagues a third of mankind was killed, by the fire and smoke and sulfur coming out of their mouths.”

This may not mean anything.

(We'll pick up in Episode 1, Part 4 due to Tumblr's 30 images-per-post limit.)

[enden-k]

Can I ask what makes Arlecchino evil? I'm v much a villain enjoyer and like some morally greyness, but I genuinely didn't pick up on a lot of bad stuff with Arlecchino. She was super helpful during Fontaine and seemed to be the only powerful person who cared about helping the common folk when the water levels were rising.

I'm not here to start an argument, just wanna expand my view 🙏

dw didnt think u want to argue! i will also use this to say i wont tolerate arguments, this goes for everyone here

i will talk about sensitive themes under the cut (mentions of when i was groomed/emotionally abused by my adoptive father/mentions of abuse/grooming in general) so if someones not good with this, be warned please and dont click for your emotional comfort.

i really love arlecchino (theres also difficult, personal reasons ig) and id rather wait for her to arrive to get more information than we have so far through other characters/side quests/main quest but well.

her goals aligned with ours in the fontaine quest which is why we have the impression shes a good/nice person, especially considering our other meetings with the harbingers we met so far (signora, childe, scara, dottore) and the situations. shes very calm and diplomatic (lets see how it changes in the next update when we fight her)

but we shouldnt forget how the travellers on their toes the entire time/everytime they come in contact with arle. its because shes a harbinger after all. shes a danger. her graceful politeness and calmness is supposed to have you on guard, make your hairs rise. shes mentioned to be manipulative and shes manipulating others to achieve what she wants by being nice and calm. she has ulterior motives. we should be careful. this is my impression based on my own gaming experience and idk if it was the same w others, but bc of us being on guard around her i was always prepared for her to turn on us until the end of the main quest.

anw, arle is supposed to be intimidating and have you wary. even tho she comes off as nice and polite, having done good and helped in the main story. its bc thats what she wanted and you happened to have the same goal. also lets not forget scaras and childes thoughts about her which already tells a lot

she has two sides. the one we saw in the quest, the graceful, calm, polite face to get what she wants. and the other, the one scara and childe talk about here, the one they call "crazy"

not to mention her codename, "the knave". what does it mean? servant. what else does it mean? "dishonest/deceitful man". basically, swindler. isnt it perfect?

shes manipulative and whatever her "true" nature is, we dont know (yet). she may have "good intentions" here or there but will achieve them no matter what it takes.

as for the thing you can consider as bad; the house of the hearth is an orphanage that raises children into fatui agents. only those who have potential join the ranks while the others are kept close (its not known whats done with them afaik). theyre basically grooming/raising child soldiers/spies.

before the sensitive stuff comes up, for the ppl who dont want to proceed, arlecchino fools/manipulates you into thinking shes a nice person/good parent. its amazing and so in character for her. its also scary how some ppl cant see the abuse/manipulation unless you went through this too or well. just actually read and realize it.

arlecchino is an emotionally manipulative parental figure. now, this is coming from someone who went through heavy abuse/was groomed by their adoptive father who was extremely manipulative and i spot so many things very well known to me. others who went through the same get this feeling. these signs you immediately recognize.

you get punished for the tiniest mistakes and when you get loved, it makes you forget all that was done to you, just for that tiny bit of affection you crave. you try to do your best, to do everything asked and expected of you, not to disappoint the only parent you have and youre dependent on, to be a good kid deserving of love and when you slip up youre in shambles. there was a time i did a tiny mistake by accident and my father said to me in the coldest voice "you broke my trust" and i remember so vividly how it broke me, how i cried until i got sick. i was physically abused before and none of it hurt me more than this. it still gets to me after all those years. emotional manipulation is cruel

what im trying to say is, she came in a time of need. taken as a savior while it just is one abuser swapped out with another. like my adoptive father having me dependent, giving me love i never received and being everything i wanted, making me believe hes everything i need, a common thing abusers do. wanting to do everything youre asked of and do it good, the fear of disappointing and being punished, believing you deserved it bc its your fault and treating your abuser like a savior, being conditioned. this is whats happening.

now, arle genuinely loves and protects her children; its very clear that the life of the children matter to her the most (look at childes line and freminet/lynette etc) - she was one of them too after all. so, its possible to love and still do these. moral greyness etcetc

anyway idk if its understandable or if i can explain it in proper words while maintaining a good distance so ill add the voicelines of the siblings heavily implying this, and also a tweet adressing this that brings it to proper words, better than i can say

tweet here bc tmblr doesnt insert the link properly

[samarecharm]

Ryuji learns immediately that Akira is a little food goblin and in the worst way possible 😭 He eats literally anything, he doesnt attempt to ‘chef up’ anything he cooks. He draws the line at expired food but the food he makes for himself looks so fucking sad (ryujis words) that it might as well be garbage. And its not that Akira Wont cook or is averse to Learning how to cook, hes just. Busy. And he really doesnt balk at what most would consider bad tasting food. But ryuji does!!! He DOES balk!!!! He balks alot in fact! So while he knows he himself is not the Best cook in the world, he IS someone raised by his momma, and he will use everything she taught him to make food that Akira will ACTUALLY like and not just tolerate.

So he takes Akira food shopping in the market, picks out vegetables and spices and meats that Akira admits (embarrassed) he has never touched in his life. He tells Akira what to look for in markets, whats normally in season, what the appropriate prices are, what different cuts of meat are meant for, and Akira follows him like a toddler following their mother, looking at the displays listening intently. Hes a smart kid. Scary smart. And he picks and chooses whats worth investing into, whether Ryuji realizes it or not. So Akira listens and absorbs whatever Ryuji is telling him, bc Ryuji matters to him.

Ryuji has him on prep work duty. He shows Akira the easy way to chop and cube vegetables. Remembers halfway through that Akira is actually wicked scary with a blade; shows him a video of a professional cutting celery at lightning speed and is SO excited to see Akira replicate it near perfectly. Hes like a machine; chopping with such laser precision and Akira cannot help but feel a little bit warm when Ryuji openly compliments him

Ryuji is so loud and brash everywhere but the kitchen. Hes focused in a way Akira has never seen him be; listing off instructions and tips, carefully adding ingredients and measuring things by eye. While making the stew, he blanks on the amount of seasoning he should be adding, and before Akira can try to help him rubberduck, Ryuji video calls his mom. And Akira almost panics bc what if she was asleep? Or what if shes working??? But she picks up after two rings, wearing a nightgown and smiling huge and wide into the camera. Ryuji waves at her, and then moves the phone a bit to get Akira into frame. He does a very chill, not at all panicked and anxious wave and she smiles at him too.

Ryuji shows her the pot stewing and she comments on the coloring and texture of it. She pokes fun at him (‘oo did you go to a fancy market? Those beef cuts looks very nice’) to which ryuji waves her off, used to her teasing.

‘Have that young man try to season it; this is a team effort!’ And so Ryuji props the phone up so that she can see him and Akira by the stove top as she guides them. A sprinkle of this seasoning from top to bottom, yes perfect, and a pinch of that seasoning- ehh a little more than that- okay perfect, and add a ton of that seasoning in front of you- more. More. Ryuji I said a Ton, tell him i said a Ton- oh right he can hear me I SAID ADD A TON- okay thats it i think, if it comes out too salty, scoop some out and replace it with more stock or some water.

And from then on Ryuji just chats with his mom while Akira watches from his side of the counter; Ryuji mentions the nice lake that he wants to try fishing at, and some nice natural paths to run on in the mornings, and she tells him about her shift and the movie she saw the other day with some friends. Its very nice. It comes so easy to them; Akira cant remember the last time he got to hear his mom just chat about her life with him. Kinda hurts, but not really. Not when hes got Sojiro calling him, telling him about his day while Akira tinkers about at his desk. Its basically the same thing; even better when Akira thinks about it.

And then he thinks some more. And into the realization that Ryuji is here with him in his house cooking and relaxing and chatting with his mom. The tv is on in the livingroom buzzing at a volume thats barely audible. The setting sun is peaking through the curtains. His mom makes a snide comment about her coworker that makes Ryuji laugh a bit under his breath, and Akira is like. Painfully aware of how nice this feels. Warm and easy. It feels a bit silly to even say it but it feels domestic; it feels like home. And hes always been here, always lived here, but it didnt feel like Home as much as it did in this moment, with Ryuji idly chatting with his mom as he tended to the pot on the stove. He wants to capture this moment and keep it tucked away somewhere. And later on, when hes staring at the ceiling, head swimming as he tries to fall asleep, he’ll think ‘no. I dont want to just have this moment. I want more moments like this. I want to live in these moments again and again and again.’ Hes greedy like that, he thinks. He wants and wants and wants; wants so bad it makes his chest ache.

The stew comes out good. A bit salty, which Ryuji remedies by adding a bit more stock to the pot after theyve had their servings. Akiras face is a mix of childlike delight and contentment, eyes bright in that sweet and adorable way that has Ryujis face turning pink, suddenly a bit shy. Being complimented about his cooking is a different kind of nice hes not used to. Akira does a little happy bop with his head, the same bop he’ll do when he eats sweets with Ann.

“This is Really good-‘

“Oi! Please chew everything first before talking.”

Akira thinks its an act of love. In the same way art from Yusuke is an act of love, and the way Hangout Nights with Ann is an act of love; this is Ryujis. I want you to eat well. I want you to be well. Because I care about you. Ryuji cares so much. To come and stay with him. To cook with him, to live with him, even if for a moment. ‘My place…is right at your side.’ ‘Whaddya mean? Youre there.’ Like it keeps Akira up at night sometimes thinking of how much hes loved. It feels so foreign to him, yet natural all at once. Waking up to the rest of the breakfast Ryuji left for him after cooking. Ryuji listening to him ramble about some tech shit Akira knows only he truly cares about (Ryuji pays attention and tries to follow which is more than Akira can ask for). Like its a bit overwhelming but its nice. Its warm and loving and its nice.

Ryuji finds himself napping against Akiras taller frame on the couch, the movie they picked out failing to keep him entertained enough, and Akira thinks Ryuji feels the same way; its warm and loving and nice.

[amysubmits]

I dont know what to realistically expect when its time for me and my Daddy to have our first intercourse. Lately in our sexting and having playtime over text and calls, as we are currently in a ldr, its been all about him.. I am worried that it will be like that as well when its time. it will be my first time having sex, and me reading alot of erotica and romance and intimacy in fiction books and novels doesn't help that I want it to be as perfect as I read about, but I know its unrealistic.. I have asked him multiple times in the many months we have dated what's it gonna be like or what are we gonna do when its time for sex and he always said that he will take good care of me and we will do it all depending on me and how I am feeling and that its different when we are sexting and playing over the phone and how it will really be, that sometimes he gets rougher just to get things going and exciting over the phone but when its time it wont be like that because he knows that I am a virgin and that I am inexperienced.. I hope you understand how I feel and please advice me..

Hey Anon :)

I don't mean to suggest that I assume most people lose their virginity as minors because that certainly isn't the case. I was an adult myself, actually. At the same time, because it's not uncommon for people to experience this as minors, when I get anonymous messages referencing virginity I always feel the need to say that I am hoping and assuming you are at least 18, and if not you shouldn't be on my blog.

With that out of the way...

I think your worries are really understandable to me given how you're facing the unknown, and given the nature of your sexting themes. It's awesome that you've raised those questions/concerns to your Daddy multiple times! Communicating things like that are so important but can be so easy to shy away from doing as a new sub so I'm so glad to hear that you did that! And it sounds like he tried to reassure you that he won't push for anything that is too much for you or you aren't enjoying in the moment, which, in my opinion, is exactly what should be the case.

I think the #1 priority should be making this an enjoyable, non-scary experience for you. I can imagine being in your shoes and wanting to be this "perfect sub" based on your understanding of the 'perfect sub' from erotica and stuff, as well as wanting to make some of your sexting experiences a reality. I can understand the instinct to put that pressure on yourself. However, I'd really encourage you to try to be aware of you putting that pressure only ourself, and trying to resist it. Honestly, I think a lot of subs if they were to write out what "perfect sub" or "ideal sub" would be like...their description would not be the healthiest view of what a sub is. Many of us, even when we logically know otherwise, still hold onto some parts of your brains that think that we'd be a "better sub" if we had the least amount of limits possible, or if we needed as little as possible from our doms and were able to make everything about their pleasure. But those are really toxic ideas if taken seriously so it's really important to resist those - at any/every phase of D/s in my opinion, but especially when you're new to sex. Even as a sub with a few years of experience, I still find myself needing to be more vocal about how things feel, or do more guiding when I am trying something new to me. I think it's healthiest for me to do that, though - so we try to prioritize being healthy over being as subbie as possible.

Right now, your partner can't possibly know what feels good to your body during sex because you have no experience with that yourself, so you don't really know your own body in that way...so he can't either. And with that being the case, the best way to explore your body and learn what does and doesn't feel good to you, is to let you do a lot of guiding the situation in your early experiences. How fast, how deep, what position or angle, etc should all be based on what feels best to you, in my opinion. So that will likely look like starting really slow, and then you letting him know if you want deeper or faster or slower or if the angle is uncomfortable or painful at all, etc.

Frankly, it may not feel super submissive if you find that you feel the most submissive when you're in a passive role. You'll be leading the situation somewhat....but submitting isn't all about being passive. Cautiously exploring your body together while giving him information about how it's feeling for you, is going to give him lots of great information that he can someday use to lead your sexual interactions more himself. So, I think you could still very much see the experience as an act of submission as you'd be serving your Daddy and your relationship really well by doing that. To me, this route would be the most ideal.

At minimum though, I'd suggest trying to come up with specific boundaries that you have for this first experience. I assume that part of your fear of not knowing what to expect comes from fears that X, Y or Z will happen. Based on what your ask said, I'd think some of your fears might be that the interact would be too focused on his pleasure and not enough on your own, and another might be that you'd worry he'll be really rough like he's been in your sexting. If those assumptions are accurate, I'd share those specific concerns with him and set roughness as a limit. With PIV being the goal, he may need some time focused on him as far as a handjob or blowjob to get him hard. But if that is the case, you could still agree to something like...the situation will be as focused on you as reasonably possible, and agreeing to some sort of check-in related to whether you've had enough time specifically focused on you. And if you have any other specific concerns or fears, should be set as limits if at all possible. I say 'if at all possible' because if your fear is something like...being afraid that you won't be able to orgasm, then that isn't necessarily something you can set as a hard limit as your body just may not cooperate. But if your fears are things like...you're worried about being tied down during sex, or you're worried about a certain position or something, those are things you can (and in my opinion should) set as limits for your first experience.

In a nutshell, I think it'd be really tough for this first experience to be "too selfish" on your side. I'd encourage you to see being vocal about your preferences, goals, fears, dislikes, etc so that you guys can customize this as closely as possible to making it go as well as possible for you. If you want to someday submit to his wishes and preferences in bed, that's awesome, but I don't think the first few times you have sex should be about that. You have to learn your body first and understand your body a little bit yourself before you can really give control of your body over to anyone else.

I'll also add that while it's understandable to hope your first time is amazing, I'd try to adjust that expectation a little bit. I'm not at all saying it's not possible that your first time will be great, because for some people it absolutely is. And I don't think you should have too much fear that it'll go terribly, because as long as you both respect each other and communicate (as it sounds like you guys do!), it shouldn't go terribly. But, there is a lot of gray area between 'great' and 'awful'. My guess is that most people's first time is more in the neutral or slightly positive area. But when you think about your first time doing anything else...it's kinda understood that the first time won't be your best experience ever with most things. The first time with most things is a learning experience and if that's what your first time with sex primarily is...that's still a really good thing that can lead you to the "fireworks and rainbows" feeling sexual experiences you want to have later on.

I hope something in here helped. Sorry this is so long. Best of luck to you.

[stewykablooey]

what do you think stewy's reaction was when kendall went to rehab? I definitely don't think it was kendall voluntarily going, but I also don't think stewy would've went to any intervention for kendall, even if he does recognize kendall actually has problems with drugs 🤔

hmmmmmmmm i actually Do think kendall went voluntarily, mostly because i genuinely can’t imagine anyone in his life who would care enough to force him to go (or have the emotional capacity to show that they care because i Do think the sibs cared/were concerned about his substance abuse but they definitely wouldnt intervene) except maybe rava, but a) i dont think kendall would listen to her and b) if she did it was part of an ultimatum that eventually pushed kendall to check himself in. unless you’re thinking about like, a court-mandated order but idk about the logistics of that, but then yeah, i do think that could be a way that kendall ended up in rehab. (i could also see connor trying to talk to kendall about going but kendall wouldn’t listen to him either and connor wouldn’t push) but Also, i think kendall really would go voluntarily as some kind of attempt to better himself, but not really in a healthy way, more in an all-or-nothing side quest before he got himself caught into logans orbit again, or in some complete toxic mind-shift of like ‘drugs are for the weak my body is a temple’ type bullshit.

anyway back to stewy: Yes, u are so right that he would not intervene, just like the sibs he obviously cares but he would never take it upon himself to get kendall to seek help because he feels that a) thats not his responsibility and b) its not his business. as close as they are and as intertwined as their lives and business becomes, i think stewy very much draws a boundary between him and kendall that they each are granted autonomy as an adult. whatever kendall does is his business and whatever stewy does is stewys business and they can meet in the middle wherever those things might cross, or just enjoy their friendship outside whatever those things may be. and this is for specific things, like rehab or kendalls marriage, which is also something im sure stewy wouldnt touch with a 100 foot pole. obviously the bigger picture stuff, stewy Does get himself involved in, like kendalls vendatta against logan, or trying to get kendall out of the company. but i think in a way stewy sees that big picture as much more viable, if he can fix the root of this, then all the things about kendall that he cant and wont touch will be better for it by proxy. if kendall could just be a normal billionaire without the roy family sickness then he could be normal about drugs, like stewy is.

so to finally answer your question lol: i think ultimately stewy saw as that, none of his business but also thought of it as pointless. i dont think he saw it as a bad thing and i think maybe he did hope something good would come out of it for kendall, but i think stewy never saw kendalls drug problem as a drug problem, i think he saw it as a logan problem, as a Roy problem, so he wouldn’t have had high hopes for this making any significant impact on kendall.

bonus: idk if anyone has even said this but i wanna get in front of it before anyone does, theres also no Goddamn Way that kendall going to rehab or kendall overdosing or kendalls substance abuse would e v e r make stewy think twice about his own drug use. i think stewy fully believes he is the smartest most perfect most balanced drug user in all of new york city and that whatever kendalls relationship to drugs is, no matter how sad or scary, doesn’t apply to him because he has the most perfect relationship to drugs ever (whether that is true or not)

[voiceofsword]

Psssst. If you have any headcannons to spare, how do you think Crazy: B is at handshake/fan events 👀 Ever since Mika mentions a fans itabag I’ve been obsessed

OK this one wont be super long bc ill be accompanying it with doodles but, u know the drill, under read more so i dont stretch people’s dashboards out

im gonna start with rinne i think he is VERY enthusiastic. he’s so happy to be there man. like he’s usually loud and kind of obnoxious regardless but this brings it out even more, most fans eat it up bc thats just his persona now, right. if any older fans show up he gets a bit softer/quieter to accommodate for them because he trusts them. 

if he notices fans being too shy/awkward he’ll try his best to hype them up and make them feel welcome i.e everybody be nice to this fan or i’ll blow this whole place up! but at the same time it’s like the second he sniffs out that they’re nervous he becomes a bit more pushy (WELL-MEANING OFC) AND IT CAN GET TO BE ALMOST SCARY… HE WILL EITHER GET SOFT AND UNDERSTANDING OR HE WILL EXPLODE ON U AND TRY TO MAKE U EXCITED WITH HIM THERES NO IN-BETWEEN… he will point out that ur nervous and ask u why that is. maybe poke a little bit of fun. obviously not enough to make you cry or whatever but enough for you to shake a little bit, so that after you leave you can look back at the pictures and memories like damn im actually glad rinne amagi helped me out of my shell

hes like an apex predator he can sense fear but instead of k wording you he forces you to do peace signs with him in photos

niki like always is super friendly and welcoming. he tries his best to make fans have fun! he isn’t nearly as pushy as rinne and doesn’t really pry. he makes small talk and if he thinks you smell nice he Will point it out! he will compliment and laugh a lot and overall be very silly. 80% of any event he’s playing footsie with rinne under the table and occasionally during fan meets they’ll start play bickering both for The Bit and also because they cant go too long without doing it it sustains them. 

one concerning thing about niki is that regardless of the circumstances he will always ALWAYS accept food, even though he is not supposed to. he sneaks off to eat snacks to prevent hunger pangs and if any fan catches him while offering food he will most assuredly be like oh hell ya, which is why the other guys are constantly on the look-out for him. while almost all fans do it in good faith i can imagine he’s gotten sick from at least one instance of this happening but he never learns because he cannot for the life of him turn down stuff he can eat. kohaku and rinne literally always have an eye on him to make sure his breaks stay short and to haul his ass back to the table 

himeru is perfect. like as a meet and greet idol he is exemplary. it’s almost scary. he gives the perfect amount of small talk, compliments you just enough, smiles the whole time. holds your hand for enough time, brushes his hair behind his ear acting all handsome, laughs at anything and everything that might be a joke….it’s like he has a mental checklist for every encounter. he studies this shit every night before an event so he has it down to a T. he makes meeting the others feel like youre talking to the teletubbies 

like rinne he senses fear and while he doesnt push like rinne does it’s almost like. he’s smug about it. he knows he’s that good! HE’S SO RADIANT YOU CAN’T LOOK AT HIM FOR TOO LONG���

ok lastly kohaku! kohaku i feel like would definitely try his best to copy himeru. he thinks the other two are not good examples, so partly himeru’s trying to show off because he knows kohaku is watching. being good friends with aira also has him practicing this a lot with him, too. but on his own kohakuchan is good at talking to people, slightly less good at maintaining eye contact or handshakes but he’s working on it! you can tell he’s new to it but he’s trying his best so it makes it all the more endearing. 

the other three point it out a lot when they think he or the fans can’t hear. not in a malicious way theyre just happy to see kohaku’s having fun. his encounters definitely feel a little more rushed but not because he necessarily wants it to be over you can tell hes just a bit more nervous to be 1 on 1. sometimes the other guys do something stupid in the sidelines so he can get angry and have him let loose. anyways Be nice to him 

[rosewoodconch]

RWCH Readathon 2024: Day 4

Underciver Princess - Chapter 9

THE GIRLIES GET TO BOND! FINALLY

Im on a train so his is literally my thoughts as i listen to the audiobook instead of reading a physical book

I really love the visual of Ani and Ellie painting each others nails... stay tuned for something about that tomorrow? ;)

Ellie tidied the room! I really adore that Ellies messiness isnt necessarily gone, but you can try that Ellie has really tried to sort it out

AND OH MY GOD

WHAT DO YOU MEAN STANDING IN JUST BRIEFS

We were too casual about this

Also you can wear a bra or tank top to dye your hair trust me i do it every month

This is the gayest thing I've ever read and I've been on ao3 since i was 12

The velvet underground is excellent, and i think you should all go listen to them

Their lil apologies and the "Mr Truffles." Im dying i love them

NON BINARY / ANDROGENOUS ELLIE MY BELOVED

Baby gender funky

Ellie is legit the reason i figured out i maybe was gender funky so shoutout to ellie wolf the most gender ever

Even though ellie did get to choose Rosewood that easily, i like that she can still kind of relate to lottie in that it wasn't the easiest thing to get there, even though they have different circumstances

I like that ellie really genuinely is in awe of ellie and shes trying to say that

But honestly yeah some of the others probably wont apprciate it as much as them both because they almost couldnt go here

"Ill gladly beat them up for you" cut to Edmunds nose...

"I'm perfectly capable of beating up my own enemies" well... not yet, but you'll get there

Honestly yeah. Dying hair is a true bonding experience. I remember my gf dying my hair for the first time and its one of the... most non romantic non sexual but intimate things

Maybe Charles boyle from b99 had a point about the shampoo...

The kitchen sounds like heaven

"Like she'd found a little home with her" GUYS IM CRYING ON A TRAIN I CANT DO THIS

Right onto the "Bad Thing"

Thats the most scary way she could've phrased that

Poor lottie she just wanted to please

Adina devine once again could punch me and I'd thank her

I love Ellie so much, shes such a little actress

Prof devine is so chaotic good i adore her

I feel like theres not enough fan art of their pajamas!??!?!? Ellie likes star wars and we dont talk about that enough

I love their lil blossoming friendship, the way they cant stay mad or cross and just burst out laughing theyre so sweet

William tufty!!! What a man

I have such a perfect image of this room in my mind, but a glass table is no where in it that feels so wrong

I dont like the term loveseat

I think that this scene and the interaction between prof and devine proves that she knows ellies identity. We never get confirmation of it, but like... someone must have her actual legal documents right? For exams and stuff?

"The fates have placed you together" UGH I NEED A SOULMATE AU RIGHT NOW

All of devines speech at the end of this bit feels like its got so much power behind it, like shes casting a spell.

She understands these girls so intensely that I wonder if she had a similar experience when she was a student. Did she go to Rosewood?

"We can achieve amazing things when we uplift one another"

Reminds me so much of "no one can make you feel inferior without your consent" from YOU GUESSED IT Barbie Princess Charm School

I promise I'll have a different comparison eventually

Theyre a little sanctuary 😭😭😭

Finally, the ominous little bit about the rumour, growing like weeds in the grounds of rosewood is so poetic and so full of suspense i love it so much

It really sets up quite how dangerous the rumour could and will be

It also comes back to the whole thing about Lottie being somehow tied to the roses and garden. And the rumour and things stirring as weeds, here to disrupt her perfect life at Rosewood

And we're so back. This is the chapter that lowkey gave me faith again. The way the settings are described and the character motivations are softly shown and they feel like real moving characters.

I really appreciate this humanising Devine too, while also making her seem otherworldly at the same time. It's like a heightened version of Binahs almost omniscience.

All in all, this chapter makes me really happy and i need fan art of all of it please @ Rosewood artists

[jaimebluesq]

SangYao for the Scary OTP? :)

Oooh, SangYao! This should be fun *rubs hands together*. Thank you so much for the ask :D

Which one is more fond of scary movies: Nie Huaisang - he loves them, loves pretending to be scared, especially when Meng Yao's around so he can run to him and cajole him into 'comforting' him. And Meng Yao loves being needed, so even though he's not a fan of the movies, he doesn't mind when NHS puts one on.

Which one gets the most excited about Halloween: BOTH, but for different reasons. NHS loves dressing up, finding the *best* costume and flaunting it, and spending time with all of his loved ones, and what's Halloween but an excuse to have a party? And speaking of parties... this is why Meng Yao gets excited about Halloween, because he gets to PLAN the most fabulous, the best party of the year - and if he happens to choose themes or tweak things a little to accomodate NHS' costume of the year, then none are the wiser ;) And yes, these two would do a KILLER couple's costume!

Which one would be more likely to survive the apocalypse: BOTH. These two are survivors in their own ways, more so than most in the canon (my opinion). NHS has the power of Dage, the puppy dog eyes of cajoling, and an innate ability to fly by the seat of his pants to get what he wants. Meng Yao, for his part, has planned for every contingency, including nuclear apocalypses, and will definitely be among the survivors. And then when you put these two TOGETHER, they are definitely coming out on top!

Which one would literally kill for the other: BOTH. We all know NHS would kill for someone he loves (else canon would not have happened), even if he wont' do the job himself and instead get someone else to do it and take the blame. But Meng Yao tends to classify everyone around him as "those with me" and "those against me", and he would kill for all of those who are in the with him category - of which NHS has always been (and arguably in canon as well, at least until NHS got him killed).

Which one likes to scare or startle the other: Nie Huaisang loves to TRY to startle Meng Yao, but he doesn't *really* try, just pretends to be fun and have an excuse to put his hands on his boyfriend. Meng Yao always hears him coming but pretends he doesn't, so it's a game between them! But Meng Yao unintentionally succeeds at startling NHS - our boy gets very lost in his brain when he's painting or writing or doing anything creative, and Meng Yao can think he's telegraphing his approach so NHS will hear him coming, but NHS doesn't and gets startled no matter what.

Which one is more likely to need comforting when they get spooked: Meng Yao. NHS LOVES being comforted, but he doesn't *need* it. Meng Yao, however, instinctively thinks he's on his own even if his brain knows he isn't, and his childhood has really traumatised him, so when he's spooked, he's SPOOKED. Thankfully, NHS can read people better than Meng Yao can, and at the first hint that Meng Yao needs comfort, he'll hang off of him and pretend it's *him* that needs it, because Meng Yao will NOT ask for it.

Which one always puts on a brave face: Meng Yao, for sure! NHS puts on a coward's face, while Meng Yao has perfected his customer service smile (I consider that his brave face).

Which one would be more dangerous if they suddenly became violent: (Looks at canon). BOTH.

Which one would be more likely to commit a crime: (Looks at canon). BOTH :D

Which one believes in ghosts: In canon, both because it's part of the universe. In an AU, neither - NHS might pretend he does for fun, but he won't believe it if he doesn't see it. Meng Yao is highly skeptical and refuses to believe in anything he can't see, feel, or hear himself, and others' perceptions are rarely to be trusted.

Which one likes to watch spooky show on television: Nie Huaisang, reasons similar to the movies - but Meng Yao doesn't mind letting him ;)

Which one would propose the idea of holding a seance: Nie Huaisang might as a lark, but not seriously. Meng Yao would only suggest it if it's part of a greater plan to do something else, like trick some rich guy out of his money or kill his father.

Which one has nightmares more often: Meng Yao. So many things give him nightmares, from his childhood in the brothel to the Sunshot Campaign.

Which one would want to explore a real haunted house: NEITHER. NHS wouldn't want to get dirty, and Meng Yao would be insulted you'd think he'd go into a death trap that likely hasn't seen renovations in five decades.

[transfemlogan]

if i had proof/evidence i would’ve shared it literal years ago. i’m just trying to prevent anyone else from getting hurt by him. and after how everyone has handled this, i really don’t think opening my heart up and bleeding out for an angry mob who has been nothing but violent is in any way safe, especially since i’m not lucky enough to be able to “prove” it. they’ve made it clear they’ll never listen anyway. why bother…

the death threats concerns is because i was sent countless death threats and kms’s for literally nothing at all by fanders even when i was still with thomas. it kinda ruined fandom for me altogether and i can’t even engage much in any fandom anymore (not even for my special interests :( )because of it. i was anticipating that happening again. and i wasn’t exactly wrong.

i wont be coming back here so if you say anything to me i won’t see it. i don’t know how much more my damn heart can take. i just wanted to protect you all from him so he couldn’t ever hurt anyone else ever again. it hurts that everyone’s response is so cruel. just let me help you…

thanks for the donation btw. i’ll post proof on twitter of using it for necessities once i get everything i currently have going on sorted out. it’ll help, i do appreciate it. thanks

(sorry you were abused and disbelieved. sending solidarity. NO ONE should need to provide proof/evidence or share every gory detail or be able to perform the perfect victim or whatever to be believed. let’s build a world where it’s as simple as saying “this individual abused me” so no one ever goes through this again, shall we?)

hi, atlas. i know you said you won't see this if I reply, but that's alright.

i will be taking what you say in good faith. i know most people aren't, for obvious reasons, but any feelings I have on this ask or you I will not state.

I'm sorry for whatever happened to you. and it sucks not being able to prove yourself to others. Attempting to speak out, only to get ridiculed and attacked is one of the most scary things about trying to speak. Again, I can 100% relate as someone who grew up in an abusive household and was in an abusive relationship. I hope you can find the help that you need & I hope my donation helped at all.

I will say, however, creating a world where someone can just say something and have it be believed no matter what is not a world I want to live in. Which I know is hard for a lot of people to understand, because S/A & abuse is one of the worse things someone can do and whoever does it deserves a neverending punishment, but people are liars. And while people who lie abt S/A & abuse are a very small amount of people, it still happens.

And there's a different set of "rules" when it comes to certain situations. I expect my friends and family to believe me about my abuse, but I don't expect strangers to about another stranger without any proof. If my abuser somehow became super famous, I do not expect them to believe me immediately without any evidence, bexause anyone can just say anything.

(Plus, I'd argue not every situation is black and white— yes, my ex emotionally abused me and caused trauma that I still deal with today after 5 fucking years, but I do not view her as an abuser. We were both children and it was her first relationship. She was just a very insecure person and we were surrounded by the wrong group of friends. That's my specific situation, obviously, but me-a-year after it happened and me-5-years-later both have very differing views on the situation.)

I hope you can heal through whatever this is.