#it somehow gets better every time
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this album is like crack
#omr#i’ve listened to it all the way through every couple hours for the past 4 days#it somehow gets better every time#objectively the lyrics are so bad#but the extensive minor the initial statement of the theme the harmony#the sheer range of genre#the nostalgia#the image of just some guy writing a song in his swedish boarding school#i’m losing my marbles here#the moving like that music video is also possibly the worst i’ve seen#like ever in my life#can’t stop listening to it though . . .#idk how long this will last#ideally i will not get too sick of it#it is imminent though
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I got. thoughts. about valens and voices in imperial roman history. but I also got a lot of thoughts about uhhhhhh choosing your brother for co ruling the Fratricide Foundation Story Empire. many thoughts about themistius' oration too
Brotherly Love, Themistius (trans. Peter Heather & David Moncur)
⭐ places I’m at! bsky / pixiv / pillowfort /cohost / cara.app / insta
#it's also the Incest-Cannibalism Empire but that's a discussion for a different blog#all of the heavy hitters were Incest Empires btw. that's a feature of Empire across all of time. not always Cannibalism tho. TRAGIC.#but rome specifically being the Fratricide&Stuprum Empire is funny AND makes parts of this speech feel. uh. UHHHHH.#feels like you're trying to overwrite history and while you succeeded ONCE the uncle-nephew antagonism with a body count#somehow feels worse????? feels worse. i dont like anything that happened to valentinian 2#anyway. as a result: i personally will be including the bigamy accusations against valentinian into my belief system#stuprum babyyyyy! a requirement for every emperor! valens is lacking here so valentinian has to pick up the slack#valens will be giving me an opening to fire shots at figures in christianity i dislike which is honestly better than scandalous sex#later roman empire tag#komiks tag#brother emperors tag#IF. you missed my brother emperors posting. the head in hands thing here is meant to be a little bit offputting on account of#valentinian being valens' imperial maker. that's a life in your hands. overtures of fratricide. etc. you get the point#whatever other subtext you want to apply to it from the subtext spice cabinet. im not picky. this was a quick comic i did#to shake off the depression cobwebs lmao. eventually i'll style guide this era and do comics with more intentional thought later
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Half questioning my memory of the post s4 era, half side eying a certain character, so correct me if I’m wrong, but I don’t think there was ever a time when the Buddie fandom fully took the single “Evan” from the season 4 finale as Eddie receiving “Evan” privileges from then on. From my recollection, fics stayed mostly consistent with their uses of “Evan” by Eddie, perhaps just with an emphasis on important moments (love confessions, Christopher’s adoption papers, wedding vows, NDEs, etc.) after the finale. And I had to stop myself from wondering why that is because I know why. We all know. Because nobody wanted to use “Evan” in fics when Buck had just told his parents that people who know him call him Buck. So Buddie fandom heard that, accepted it, and uses it only sparingly. In canon and fanon, even Maddie only rarely uses “Evan” anymore, and it feels even less common for her to use post-Buck Begins (if at all, actually). So the fact that Tommy and BT fans tend to use “Evan” (at least, this has been my experience) is so utterly jarring. Buck told everyone his preference, and I believe LFJ has spoken about being told to use only “Evan” when referring to Buck, so I simply do not understand anyone who believes that BT is in love already or endgame. Yes, it could go the “Buck gave Tommy ‘Evan’ privileges off-screen” route, but then why push it off-screen? It would be a major allowance made for a new love interest, and a significant step in Buck’s character arc. Yet we see nothing of the sort. So why would anyone believe that’s what happened? The last we heard, Buck had told his parents and everyone else to call him Buck exclusively, with the minimal exception of Maddie (who was, for most of his childhood, his one and only lifeline and confidant). That sort of history and characterization is not ignored if there is not something very wrong with the writers’ room. It was not even ignored by a significant portion of the fandom post-season 4, although Eddie gaining permanent “Evan” privileges would’ve been a strong indicator of a Buddie endgame (had an on-screen explanation of Eddie gaining this privilege been released). It was not ignored, and it did not change the nature of Buck in fic nor fanon. So why in hell is the same not holding true for a brand new relationship like BT?
#buddie#apologies for the rant#it just annoys me#that for 3 years this facet of Buck’s was understood and accepted by basically the entire fandom#but enter T and suddenly people are using ‘Evan’ like Buck didn’t literally walk through fire every single day of his life to keep from#being known as his parents’ ‘Evan’ again#this was literally not a problem before this past season and now everry time I see ‘Evan’ used in fics I cringe#soemtimes even when it’s Maddie or Eddie using it in a canon/character-aligned way#it’s the very definition of YOU DO NOT KNOW THIS CHARACTER to my brain#anti tommy kinard#anti tevan#anti bucktommy#anti bummy#anti bt#evan buckley#eddie diaz#and like#who cares if T is using it in canon???#he’s literally known Buck for all of 5 months at MOST#this is not a case of endgame ship getting privileges regarding each other that others don’t#this is a case of T and BT stand not understanding Buck as a character or person#even watching the whole show does not absolve someone of this weirdness because why is anyone following the lead of Tree 6 on anything Buck#maddie buckley han#maddie han#maddie buckley#btw if you’re a BT who somehow stumbled on this post despite like 4 anti tags that are easily filtered - just walk away#I am but an annoyed buddie fan who thinks that watching this show for deeper stories#is better than latching on to the newest white boy of the month#911#911 abc
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you know i got halfway through this before realizing i probably subconsciously ripped the concept from an old tumblr post sorry
#and then keith would say something rude and they would get into an argument for 3 hours#klance#vld#voltron#art#my art#ok guys we're in the tags time for my character debrief that no one asked for or cares about#i imagine this as like. far enough into their friendship that lance doesnt IMMEDIATELY come to blows#but keith feels the immediate need to make his emotional constipation everyones problem. and instigates a fight.#obviously that fucker would have to be on his actual deathbed in order to speak from tjhe heart#BUT if he somehow felt the motivation to fess up before then. it would be. such. an ordeal.#lance would be scratching his head like. why is keith insulting me out of nowhere 3982 times this week. i thought we were doing better#little does he know every time is just a try and fail on keiths part#because he needs an emotional miralax.#bless his heart.#if youre writing keith and he isnt dragged kicking screaming and dyiing into his feelings#are you even writing keith?#anyway this one goes out to katie klanced#hopefully you approve
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hong kong miku,,,
#hopping on the trend jumpscare i’m from hong kong surprise#i haven’t seen that many hk mikus around#lowkey chat i think i kinda ate with this one#however i will say i am coloring in the dark so if any colors look off that’s why#and also i haven’t opened this program in literal months i jumped straight into this no warmup no nothing#miku is what pulls me out of art block apparently i was locked in for 5 hours STRAIGHT#someone needs to teach me how to paint properly holy#not sure how i feel about the bottom left one but that was a quick one anyways#i am from hk originally but i haven’t been back in years so i have no idea about the culture other than food and mirror#OKAY let me explain the context#street food is a big thing in hk and quick and easy things like fish balls egg waffles and like siu mai and wonton noodles are popular#back then people really would just squat down on the side of the road or right in front of the shop to eat it and go#but i don’t think anyone does that anymore city life and all that#ohh i should have done instant noodles breakfasts god i loved those#if anyones from hk if you go to the causeway bay mtr station exit that leads up to the big road near sogo. do they still sell siu mai there#that shit was BANGER i remember asking for them all the time#a good majority of parents in hk would get their daughters ears pierced as a baby something about them not feeling as much pain idk#that’s just what i was told#i used the neon for her friendly standard greeting cause i wanted to incorporate the neon signs somehow without actually drawing a whole bg#lots of neon signs in hk. i heard they had to take them down cause of light pollution which is sad but understandable#everyone got their shoes from dr kong. at least when i was younger they did#boy band is self explanatory. i heard they’re really popular my mom listens to them#oh i had her messing with her shoes cause hk people move FAST. you stop for one second and you get shoved#so like a fun little allusion#gave her black roots just for fun. she is violating every school uniform code possible#this is all based off of my memory by the way so like. anyone who knows this better than i do hit me up#hatsune miku#miku from my culture#jellos scribbles#i haven’t tag yapped in so long welcome back my love i missed you
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a jamiazu sketchy sketch bc oh my god i am LOVING the energy these two are bringing with each other in this event!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! a win for the jamiazu community!!!!
#twisted wonderland#twst#jamiazu#azujami#ashenviper#wtf why do u guys get 900000 ship names GOD#jamil viper#azul ashengrotto#cereal tries to draw#goddddd i knew it was gonna be good just seeing that theyd be in the event together#but somehow it's even better than i expected#theyre somehow both bickering and bullying each other and also getting along and scheming together#IT'S CUTE THEYRE FUN TOGETHER#and most importantly. jamil is having a good time#idk theyll probs get a bit stressed later but SO FAR JAMIL VIPER IS HAVING A GOOD TRAVEL TRIP#and that's all ive ever wanted for him#AND ALSO HIS CHEMISTRY WITH AZUL IS OFF THE CHARTS#god that scene when theyre bullying each other when the designer was talking about azuls outfit#and ace is like SENPAIS THE VIBES R BAD PLEASE DONT FIGHT#im like ace my beloved son. they are Flirting. u do this same thing with juice every day.#ok god i need to go to bed but im havin a great time w/this event#shoutout to youtuber ekala for the translations i owe them my life
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[Mii Maker Music]
!!Find the palette in this thread!!
#my art stuff#beetlejuice#cartoon#toonjuice#digital art#bugs#emoji#I made my own brush for the bugs so I can use them in the future#I’m trying to make art more enjoyable for myself and that means making it much less complicated and take less time#so I’m hoping to use this brush more in the future when drawing beej#or things in general#I’m getting better at lightning the weight I put on myself with my art#but it’s an upphills battle and I am STRUGGLING#I’ve been using this eene inker randomly for a while now and it’s making art so much easier to do for me somehow#but it looks so disgusting in my art. not cus it’s an ugly brush. I think it’s really nice-looking actually#but I have such a strong need for all my art to look clean and for every line to be intentionally put where it is#I have a tendancy to go in and fix singular pixels in EVERYTHING when I draw. even if just to make it intentionally look unintentional#but this brush does it on it’s own and I haven’t felt this relaxed while making digital art in MANY years and it’s STRESSING ME OUT#but it’s good that I can relax. That’s the goal. I want to be able to rnjoy drawing again.#The biggest hurdle is my autism hating change but once I’m past that I know I’ll be right as rain#in the meantime I hope people can still enjoy what little stuff I mannage to crank out randomly#also don’t ask me what the style is. my hand just went off with the “whatever just get it down real quick” mentality#I really need to draw the sweetheart more… I say when he is all I draw besides myself anymore-
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Just curious what the average level of personal investment in these sorts of things is. Like, how much do people usually get into silly stuff like this their friends ask of them? etc. etc. Which I know, only surveying a small sample on a very specific website means I'm not getting an exact average idea lol, but.. curious nonetheless .. Maybe reblog for bigger sample size but also this is not very serious at all/not worth a call to action gbhjbhjb
#which I know this could be context dependent like.. maybe you'd normally dress up but on a week that#you feel sick you wouldn't or etc. etc. - but I mean.. GENERALLY. in the most general average scenario#where you have the average amount of health and free time that you always do. etc. just based on your personality#and level of investment in these things - what on AVERAGE are you most inclined to do#also of course assume they communicate with you ahead of time and are not like planning a part last minute#like 'throw together costume in 5 hours and show up tonight randomly' or etc. I would hope that if we're going with the#AVERAGE of things - most people's friends have better communication skills than springing entire parties#on people last minute lol#assume you have like.. a few days-a week or so to prepare. however ealrly people usually start talking about#birthdays. In my experience it's usually one or two weeks ahead of time. Like 'oh next weekend' or 'oh two weeks from now' etc.#ANYWAY.. feeling a little Sick again of course but still trying to get some photos or something posted#AGAIN i promise I am not going to exlcusively post polls and ntohing else forever hgkjgnekj#I just really really love the ability to post polls and have always my whole life been obsessed with surveying people#I used to think I wanted to do that as a career somehow like.. be one of the people that does psychological interviews#or produce interview asessments for a company or etc. etc. I am always the one friend in the group thats giving out custom made#surveys or asking for other simialr stuff (did you ever take an mbti quiz? how about enneagra#m?? oh yeah I know they're not really scientifically valid or antyhing but like... DID you take them?? huh?? did you??please?? ghjj)#I simply cannot resist.. posting a little poll every once in a while.. as a treat#whilst I still fall behind on like actual content and costumes and stuff gbjhbjh#New poll adventure should be not as much of a wait as the last one was though since I already have the writing#for it really. I just have to do the ms paint sketch. hopefully no unexpected other health issues will get in the way#*** *** ***#< (anytime I do these three star patterns it is an ocd compulsion not me bleeping out words or something just ignore it lol)#(it means something secret in my evil brain just pretend you do not see it. significant only to me)#BUT YEAH.. ... poll... what type of costume party atendee are you?#:0c
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on my merrily lil way to get margs with the bestie and yk what . . i think it’ll save me (ㅅ´ ˘ `)
#every month we go to chilis & plot and i’m so excited#plot aka planning our next month out bc we wanna be silly & have fun#and it’s so easy to get caught up in the day to days so yeah !!#today was saauuurr >_< but i’m in an increasingly better mood#if i get a lil twirly tonight then mayhaps i will do a face reveal bc its been a loooong time and yeah#my hair is finally longer again and i’ve been feeling sm better about it all ^_^#(but ill prob shy out so just believe me when i say my hair looks pretty !!)#anyway !!! yk me. gotta get my daily yaps in somehow.#₊˚⊹ ᰔ xoxo aims#ヾ( ˃ᴗ˂ )◞ — ✩ daily yap.
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i finally finished tgcf!!! I definitely had some gripes at times about the pacing (just a personal taste thing, I like short/quick paced things and it felt like it dragged sometimes) but everything from volume 6 onwards was absolutely Crazy, I loved it so much. a lot of those final battles felt extremely cinematic, I felt like I was watching the climax of a shonen anime or something. I also get why people say hualian invented love now, oh my god their love story is beautiful. hua cheng's speech while he's disappearing... I will not be recovering. I love how happy they are in the extras too, I love how much they tease each other :') they deserve this joy after all the shit they've been through
#I definitely have some complaints#like. the weird racism in the banyue arc#i get she was trying to critique things but it was not effective imo#and i think it couldve benefited from some editing... there were some arcs that could've been cut or shortened#that might just be my personal taste though#but i LOVED the black water arc. I was on the edge of my seat the whole time#you give me tragic siblings and doomed yuri and horror elements?? delicious. i want more.#and then everything from the flashback of xie lian's banishment onward was riveting#like. watching xie lian's whole life fall apart was crazy#every time i thought it couldn't possibly get worse IT SOMEHOW GOT WORSE. NAUSEATING.#but then the end of that arc?? with the bamboo hat??? i could've cried. i love you xie lian#and then the next volume is like hey are you feeling better after all that? okay cool TIME FOR GIANT MECH BATTLES#WHAT??? OKAY!!!!!#absolutely insane nonsense. thanks mxtx 👍#and then the final battle... so fucking sick. i love hualian being drift compatible#i love xie lian being absolutely jacked bc he's been living without spiritual powers for 800 years#and i love the strength of ONE BELIEVER!!!!! I LOVE YOU HUA CHENG#explodes. i had fun :)
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i hate my face it needs to be softer and i hate my body it needs to be sharper
#there is nothing in the world i wished i had more than a smaller/rounder nose#why is that thang genuinely V#<#>#^#every direction sniffin#i want to bury my face in things and not impale them#i hate the way it looks when i smile#somehow it gets even bigger#and more downturned#and my body well . at least thats easier 2 change#im so hyper aware of how much i weigh i hate the number being known it makes me want to cry i feel too exposed#its like it being a secret keeps me safe#even though everyone can see my body anyway#if i just have that then im safe no one can hurt me#what if the number makes them see me differently#what if it changes the way i look in their eyes like it does in mine#what if the dysmorphia streaks out past just me#i know its stupid n realistically it doesnt matter at all but i am so Scared i am terrified#i hate my ed i hate everything it holds over me all the time everyday#every time i look at myself im different#n im worse#and no matter how much i suffer its never happy#im so sick rn im in pain but all i can think about is at least im not eating at least its stopping me from eating#i just want to be different i want to be anything else#i feel like im always going 2 be stuck as the grossest thing in the world#ill never get the chance to look at myself n see anything but that#i want to be better. i do. i want to just move on#im so tired. but im So awful looking. & everyone has always made sure i know it. made sure im lesser and i am#ive never had a real friend. theyve always hated me n kept be barely around because they feel bad for me. n just told me how bad i looked
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saturday quest no hoovering i'm sick of being too hot and i'm heading swiftly towards i don't want to wolf territory for everything 😅 - sit outside in the garden for a bit am. maybe my family will be outside too (: - work on digital collage pm (:
the vibe is 'generally try to encourage gentle curiosity in doing things and have a day where i'm not forcing myself' 👍 yippee!
#its saturday quest#not even having a good time on tumblr atm. things are just! well they are just. i need to switch my outlook to feel less trapped.#i can do that. i just gotta figure out how.#i don't want every day to feel like i'm catching up and spending all my energy on stuff i don't want to do with no energy to do stuff that#i do want to. i don't wanna be stuck at home all the time i wanna go out and do things. i wanna get better. or if i can't do that then#at least make some changes somehow.#when the disabilities are disabling every single day....... augh.#i want to see the day in terms of all the things i can and get to do rather than all the things i can't you know?#i just gotta figure out how!
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I really write too many emails for someone who wants to shed their skin every time they need to write an email
#I know I need to somehow get rid of those thoughts#but every email feels like it's the biggest embarassment yet#and as someone who's terrified of being perceived as embarrassing? oh well#ik ik ik ik ik it's gonna get better with time and I mean it already /has/ gotte better like there are a few situations where I can just#send an email and not think about it for an hour so yay#but also.... damn. it really still happens way too much#the overthinking needs to be stopped#simon.out.
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A collection of things I’ve screamed into the void with mild hope that the void would scream back (it did. on several of these)
I am so sorry but every single word uttered here is canon to YLS’s already insane lore. yes even the one about Jack Skellington. yes even the one about Dimentio. yes even the one that ties into MSM/TBoCI. yes ESPECIALLY the one about Captain Barnacles.
#alsooo the world talked about in the second one is about my friend’s story :)#thats a thing too. its pretty great actually but you cant find it online yet :(#hershel’s octonauts au#sighs. yeah okay for the shits and giggles i’ll tag those characters#jack skellington#dimentio#the ballad of cold island#captain barnacles#real talk i miss kane rn.. i need to. like. redesign every tboci character ever#i wanna include them in yls somehow but in their current states HAHHAHAH no#i knoowwwww i shouldn’t but uuuuaaauuuuuauuuuagh. they’re such good characters#they’re just trapped rn…… sighs#ANYWAAYYYS silon’s uncontrollable therapist rizz is the funniest part of yls canon#it’s BECAUSE of his uncontrollable therapist rizz that rosemary has two siblings#and that her dad’s becoming a better person#and that barnacles has contact with boogie at all#and that. checks notes. jack skellington almost adopted three total children#i feel like a lot of the weird side things wouldn’t have happened if#silon and arbre mort didn’t get together that one time#obviously the MAIN PLOT would have still happened. looks at professor inkling and his amnesiac boyfriend.#but viktor would have never been kidnapped. boogie would have never gotten onto the new red crab.#and funniest of all JESTER YAOI WOULD HAVE BEEN CANON. WE WERE ROBBED /hj#i’m funniest on discord#subtle advert for the server. hahahahaha.#OKAY POST THE DAMN THING
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things aren’t going well with peach. while i think my dad’s very right to be concerned that she hasn’t eaten anything in nearly 60 hours (obviously i am too), im becoming increasingly concerned that she hasn’t slept at all in around 36 hours and prior to that she was under anaesthetic, which isn’t exactly restful, so it’s closer to 48 hrs
like dad took her back to the vet today and we’ve got injections for her painkillers now because she’s not eating, and also injections for fluids (because she doesn’t drink; she only gets water from her food), so the not eating is Bad but also kinda under management, but if she doesn’t sleep soon i’m extremely worried. dad was like ‘if she doesn’t eat by tomorrow afternoon we’ll take her back because the injections will run out’ but like. if she doesn’t sleep tonight we have GOT to take her back first thing in the morning so they can sedate her or something
#her pain doesn’t seem to be too bad now that she’s got pain relief so idk what’s stopping her from sleeping#she won’t even lie down unless i’m sitting next to her. she just sits there staring out the window#her pupils are also taking up her entire eyes and have been all day#that’ll be a side effect of the medication and maybe the lack of sleep? but it won’t be making her feel any better#she can probably barely see at this point#like imagine you’ve been awake for 2 days after surgery and you’re in a lot of pain and haven’t eaten since before surgery#and are also on strong painkillers. and you also have no idea what’s wrong with you or why everyone’s doing things that hurt you#bruh your brain would be COOKED. there’s no way she has any idea what’s going on rn but she’s clearly feeling terrible#personal#like i think she’ll be ok in the long-term but she’s gotta somehow get through all these immediate issues#last time something like this happened she stopped drinking and never started again#not eating or sleeping don’t have workarounds as simple as putting water in her food#it really doesn’t help that there’s so much other shit going on rn#i’m doing a whole bunch of stuff with my phone and computer that’s taking a lot of work#but also my sister’s going on a long overseas trip that she’s leaving for tomorrow#so the combo of dad and sister coming and going constantly and also like 6 random deliveries for tech stuff in the last 2 days—#has the dogs really wound up. so georgie’s been howling at absolutely everything#and it’s rainy so my clothes aren’t trying and they’re hanging on a rack hooked on the hallway door so the door can’t close#which puts one less door between my room and the dogs so they’re waking me up every time anything happens#and i sleep during the day so that’s ALL THE TIME. i’ve had like 8 hrs of sleep between the last two afternoons#my sister always has so much random life stuff she wants to talk about and was getting really annoyed that i wasn’t very receptive#like ‘im about to go away for 3 months’ sorry i know its a big thing but i can’t just reschedule peach’s medical emergency
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Miquella to Radahn is like what Sephiroth was in ur inbox
Oh, you think that annoying anime man stopped plaguing my life at the endless stupid coincidences online including him, @heraldofcrow bringing him up at EVERY possible occasion, comments spam, reblogs with Genesis speechbubble under my annoyed rant about how I can't get rid of him and endless endless ENDLESS inbox spam by A CERTAIN JERK?! Look at THIS:
I SIMPLY CHECKED A VID THAT POPPED UP IN MY RECOMMENDATIONS BECAUSE I WANTED A BETTER LOOK AT MARIKA'S STATUE WITH MESSMER AS A BABY BUT EVEN H E R E I AM NOT ABLE TO AVOID THAT GODDAMN DIPSHIT WHEN @izunias-meme-hole SENT ME AN ASK SAYING "MESSMER IS JUST RED SEPHIROTH" IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE ANOTHER DUMB ATTEMPT AT TROLLING ME BUT NOOOOO. THAT PIECE OF SHIT AGAIN EVERY SINGLE TIME
*sets the 'days since Sephiroth annoyed me' counter to 0 again*
#ask replies#shitposting#for the context 1) I am regularly harassed by SOMEONE and Sephiroth PERSONALLY *SOMEHOW* about the topic 2) this-#-ask was received yesterday after I reblogged a funny meme about miquella being clingy @ radahn and 3) I am not actually-#-going to watch this video at least not yet because I only really watch soulsborne vids for model viewing#(so here it is for better look at that statue)#but I just checked sections of the video and IT WAS HIM AGAIN WHY IT IS ALWAYS HIM EVERY FUCKING TIME AAAAAAA#(love how I added context just so all 2 of my new followers don't get scared but I probably scared them STRONGER with it fdsghfds)#(XDDDDDDDD)#ARE YOU HAPPY CROW AND IZUNIA?????? ARE YOU HAPPY NOW?! ARE YOU S A T I S F I E D????????????#JHFSDJFHGSDH GSDHFDSG HSDFSDFHSDFSD#sdkHDSHGFDGSGFDS
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