#that shit was BANGER i remember asking for them all the time

[sea-jello]

hong kong miku,,,

[bengiyo]

Wandee Goodday Ep 2 Stray Thoughts

Last week, we finally got a show with Drake and his beautiful eyebrows and ears, and he's playing an ace character, Kao, who is struggling with dating! Our protagonist, Wandee, is a doctor at local hospital and has been crushing on another doctor for eight years. He finally confessed and got crushed before embarrassing himself. He decided to go out and hook up to prove he wasn't vanilla, and drunkenly followed his recent patient Yoryak, a boxer, and somehow succeeded. Thor is also here as Yoryak's brother, and is in a committed gay relationship. I'm having a good time.

Not this man interrupting sex for constant reassurance.

Appreciating the blue to remind us that these guys have dicks.

"Once is enough." I love this man. He's gonna be so embarrassing.

Golf knows what the people need: Thor's tiddies jiggling.

Cher out here a whole liar pretending like he don't like that man's sweat.

Kao has incredible energy. I love him.

I swore when I saw Ter.

He really tried to talk over Dee! I hate him!

That was such a gay snap holy shit.

Ter is horrible. Where are my knives?

Interesting. Cher talks like Yoryak hooks up regularly. Does he care about all of his partners like this?

It's Rain's kidnapper! Danger, Will Robinson! Please don't typecast this man!

Wow, they were already planning to sell porn of them date raping this man.

If this dude comes back later and kidnaps Wandee I will scream.

Watching with @yankeebastard and he complimented the way the show is approaching Yoryak's bisexuality, by showing that he has genuine regard for Taem as a whole person, and reflected on the mild chiding she gave him during his care for Wandee. He sincerely listens to her, and takes what she says seriously even when she isn't around.

I think Oyei's pressure is really well calibrated. It's not too much.

Obligatory Golf cameo at the queer cafe.

Getting emotional about grandmothers again.

David and I are so relieved that we recognized AJ correctly on the first try.

I think it was petty who already wrote about the way Yoryak respects people's boundaries. I love the way he asked if Wandee wanted to do it, and then left on his own when he remembered what Wandee said about hookups.

I'm going to ascend. We got good ground rules for their relationship, and I really love that Yoryak asserted that Wandee needs to use his name. On top of that, we finally have a presumed bottom being clear that he wants his dick played with too.

The lighting department is doing wonders with the contours of their bodies.

I love that Yoryak made it clear that he wants to kiss and it's coming up in their hookups.

Wow, another banger episode. This is definitely the kind of grown content I have wanted out of the genre for a long time. Thank you, Golf Tanwarin. I'm going to be thinking about Yoryak and wondering at what makes him so sensitive to his prospective lovers all week. Let me also state plainly that it feels so important that we acknowledged openly that guys who enjoy taking dick also like to have their dicks played with, too.

[sophies-junkyard]

NOBODY ASKED but… Obviously Simon’s arc in adventure time solidified the series as one of greatest of all time (and I’m so hyped for this ice king sadness renaissance) but now I’m thinking of OTHER Adventure Time moments that rewired my brain as a kid. In no particular order:

1. “Once the strong guys got it how they liked it they said ‘this is fair now. This is the law.’ Once they were winning they changed the rules”. They really had the cartoon dog say that on tv in 2014.

2. “People get built different. We don’t have to understand it, we just gotta respect it”

3. The entirety of All The Little People. That shit was absolutely nuts for a kids show but also like…. I can’t articulate the lesson I just know there was one and it haunted me. The danger of the human ego. Hubris. Irreverence. Don’t play god bro.

4. Lady and Peebles. When PB ripped Ricardio’s leg off and bashed his skull in with it. And it was so hardcore they edited it out of the episode. Bro. I remember watching that after school one day and how my jaw just DROPPED at a PRINCESS being so brutal. They let her be so fucking angry and that was a game changer.

5. [Finn, about a horrific memory] “that one’s going in the vault. Aaaaaaaaaandd. It’s gone.” I quote that CONSTANTLY. It’s a great way to bring levity to a bad situation, but also forces me to go “hey wait a sec that’s not gonna work forever”. Things don’t stay in the vault.

6. Puhoy. He lived an entire life in that pillow world. He had kids. And then it’s just gone like a dream.

7. The deer. It was probably my first real introduction to horror. The hand wiggle. You all know exactly what I’m referencing. Were the candy people stuck in that well for 6 months???

8. What Was Missing!! Obviously now because it foreshadowed (and confirmed past) Bubbline, but back then just because it was so good??? IMO, this is the episode that defined WHO our main cast was, and how their relationships needed to grow for them to be content. It set up the next 6 years of the show! Plus it gave us 2 absolute BANGERS. Ugh i rewatched that recording so many times it wasn’t even funny.

9. Ghost Princess. Really just for the line where he sounds like he’s gonna shit his pants remembering his death and then in a clear narrator voice he’s like “I was a broken man.”

10. The pajama war episode. Now I’m doing this from memory so I could be wrong, but I think this really marks the start of Finn growing up. “I’ve really enjoyed just… hanging out with you.” The ability to start over with someone you’ve got complicated history with. The kindness. The growth from both of them!! It’s a direct parallel of episode 1 but their tones couldn’t be more different and I love it.

11. The slow and horrifying realization that The Mushroom War was nuclear Armageddon. Mushroom clouds. That went so far over my head as a kid even though they reference it constantly. It finally clicked during “I remember you”. Which I am NOT gonna go into because holy fuck that’s like 18 posts on its own.

12. Goliad! A child mirroring EVERYTHING they see, for better or worse. Seeing Jake in a bad moment screaming at the kids and goliad absorbing that behavior. Seeing she can use fear to control people. Also PB was Fucking Crazy! Her line “I’m not gonna live forever… I would if I could” is even more unhinged when we learn (like years later) that she’s already 900 years old. But she does physically age so I guess there’s that. The Suitor also falls into this category of episodes.

Ok getting into some of the more talked about moments

1. OK I LIED I have to talk about I remember you. I was 11 years old. I turned on the new adventure time episode like usual. 10 minutes later I was grappling with a grief I had never imagined before. Absolutely BAWLING not just for Simon and Marceline (the PLOT), but for what it showed me. The reality that every kid tries not to think about: your loved ones will leave you someday, even if they don’t want to. It’s an episode that becomes more powerful with every year I get older. To get a bit personal, dementia has completely taken my grandparents from me. I’ve seen sides of my grandfather that should never have existed, and I must constantly forgive him for what he does… now that he doesn’t remember me. And someday it’ll be my parents. That’s just the way of the world, ya know? Anyways, I remember my mom got home right as the credits were rolling and we had a long talk about keeping people alive with memory, mortality, and how the future was far away and we should decide on dinner lmao.

2. The Hall of Egress. I was almost 15. Life was changing. I was changing, and it was strange and frightening. That feeling where you know you’re losing your childhood but you just want to cling to it. Follow the same old familiar path, stick with what’s comfortable. But life doesn’t work that way. It took me years to really understand this episode and it’s symbolism. Honestly I still don’t think I could fully explain it. It’s like. How do I put this. I was so glad to be in the target age group in that moment. I was so glad that something I was growing up with was assuring me “you’re changing, but we’re changing too”. And isn’t that the theme of adventure time? Everything stays, but it still changes.

3. The absolute horror of Ferns existence. He’s Finn, but he’s wrong and warped. All those memories of the people he loves and they can’t stand to be in the same room as him.

4. Susan Strong. The introduction of a RUNNING PLOT. The show up to that point had really been so goofy and so monster of the week. I think the only really plot heavy episode before this one was It Came From the Nightosphere? And then suddenly they call into question the fact that Finn really is the ONLY HUMAN in all of OOO. And then… is he? It was SUCH a departure from the usual tone. Ending that episode with him reaching below her hat and gasping in shock, but never telling the audience what he found. And then she’s just gone. Which leads us to Islands!

5. Min and Marty. Second saddest episode in the entirety of adventure time, made worse because you know exactly how this family is gonna end up. There’s SO MUCH to dissect about Martins behavior in the series. A reformed con artist receives a traumatic brain injury while attempting to save his son. They’re both lost at sea, and he never looks for him. Was it the emotional trauma? Was it the physical damage? Meanwhile a mother loses her husband and her child in a single night and never EVER learns why. Nobody but Martin knows what happened that night. Also Finns fear of the ocean from season 1 is finally explained. 7 years of ignoring Finns origins and then they throw you THIS??? Watching it live was unreal.

Anyways I’m sure I’ll think of more. I might add on to this later for my own sake lmao, but I’d love to hear other peoples formative moments, quotes, episodes, etc. I really just needed to dump this information out of my brain so I can get on with my week.

[thefirstknife]

New article with more details (from Jason Schreier who first broke the story). If you can't see it, I'll copy the whole text under read more.

About 100 employees were laid off in total (8%) and one of the main reasons listed is "underperformance," "sharp drop in popularity" and "poor reception of Lightfall."

So you know when for the last year and a half content creators have been shitting and pissing on the game as a full-time job and the amount of negativity and ragebait content became the only thing to make content about for them? Well they certainly won't take the blame, but I will let it be known. These people either don't understand the influence they have or they do and they're doing it on purpose, and I don't know which of these two options is worse, but I am 100% confident that their campaign of rage and hate contributed to this.

You don't base your entire community around constantly hating everything about the only game you play (despite clearly not enjoying it anymore) and somehow avoid galvanising thousands and thousands of people into perceiving the game negatively. Imagine being employees who have barely worked there for 2 years and the only community reception they've seen is 24/7 hate train for their work and then they get fired because of "poor reception" and "drop in popularity." How can they not take that personally? I am absolutely devastated for these people who delievered a banger product and who were met with an unrelenting barrage of toxic gamer children which ended up having more sway over their boss than them.

Which brings me to the next bit and that's FUCK THE CEO. He is now my mortal enemy #1. I am projecting psychic blasts directly into his brain. What an absolute spineless coward who is more willing to bow down to fucking gamers than to protect his own employees. This is absolutely rage inducing because this has happened before. From the article from 2021 about the toxic culture at Bungie:

Reading this shit from the new article absolutely fucking sent me into blind rage because I immediately remembered this. Another instance of employees suffering because of comments on reddit. And because of toxic players. And proof that leadership is not protecting employees and is instead siding with players.

Match made in heaven. Asshole gamer content creators and asshole CEOs, all of whom sit at home on piles of money made from someone else's labour. I hope they all explode. None of the people that worked on this game deserve this.

Another article with an infuriating comment from the CEO:

In an internal town hall meeting addressing a Monday round of layoffs that impacted multiple departments, Bungie CEO Pete Parsons allegedly told remaining employees that the company had kept “the right people” to continue work on Destiny 2.

"Kept the right people." Really. Veteran composers weren't the right people? Die!

Bloomberg article in full:

Bungie’s decision to cut an estimated 100 jobs from its staff of about 1,200 followed dire management warnings earlier this month of a sharp drop in the popularity of its flagship video game Destiny 2. Just two weeks ago, executives at the Sony-owned game developer told employees that revenue was running 45% below projections for the year, according to people who attended the meeting. Chief Executive Officer Pete Parsons pinned the big miss on weak player retention for Destiny 2, which has faced a poor reception since the release of its latest expansion, Lightfall. The next expansion, The Final Shape, was getting good — not great feedback — and management told those present that they planned to push back the release to June 2024 from February, according the people, who asked not to be identified because they weren’t authorized to speak publicly. The additional time would give developers a chance to improve the product. In the meantime, Parsons told staff Bungie would be cutting costs, such as for travel, as well as implementing salary and hiring freezes, the people said. Everyone would have to work together to weather the storm, he said, leaving employees feeling determined to do whatever was needed to get revenue back up. But on Monday morning the news got worse: Dozens of staffers woke up to mysterious 15-minute meetings that had been placed on their calendars, which they soon learned were part of a mass layoff. Bungie laid off around 8% of its employees, according to documentation reviewed by Bloomberg. Bungie didn’t respond to requests for comment. Employees who were let go will receive at least three months of severance and three months of Bungie-paid COBRA health insurance, although other benefits, such as expense reimbursements, ended Monday, sending some staff racing to submit their receipts. Laid-off staffers will also receive prorated bonuses, although those who were on a vesting schedule following Sony Group Corp.’s acquisition of Bungie in January 2022 will lose any shares that weren’t vested as of next month. The layoffs are part of a larger money-saving initiative at Sony’s PlayStation unit, which has also cut employees at studios such as Naughty Dog, Media Molecule and its San Mateo office. TD Cowen analyst Doug Creutz wrote in a report Monday that “events over the last few days lead us to believe that PlayStation is undergoing a restructuring.” PlayStation president Jim Ryan announced last month that he plans to resign. Many of the layoffs at Bungie affected the company’s support departments, such as community management and publishing. Remaining Bungie staff were informed that some of those areas will be outsourced moving forward.

[natalieh007]

Okay I am so into Camus and Sartre beef. So this is a little recap.

So Sartre was Marxist and Camus was not (he was in communist party but he got the fuck out as fast as he could). Also another problem Sartre believed that violence and wars could create greater good, on the other side Camus was all about a peace.

So they were friends (and rivals) for a while and then their different opinions started to show up. Then an argument broke out, but was initially confined to a relatively small group of mutual friends of the two of them. THEN Camus wrote a letter in which he wrote "hell is other people", it was kinda easy to imagine that he was referring to Sartre.

‘Absolute freedom is the right of the strongest to dominate,’ Camus wrote, while ‘absolute justice is achieved by the suppression of all contradiction: therefore it destroys freedom.’ The conflict between justice and freedom required constant re-balancing, political moderation, an acceptance and celebration of that which limits the most: our humanity. ‘To live and let live,’ he said, ‘in order to create what we are.’

That is what Camus wrote in The Rebel and Sartre was like “EWWWW” not very communist of Camus (as far as Sartre was concerned, he thought that it was possible to achieve perfect justice and freedom – that described the achievement of communism. Under capitalism, and in poverty, workers could not be free. Their options were unpalatable and inhumane: to work a pitiless and alienating job, or to die. But by removing the oppressors and broadly returning autonomy to the workers, communism allows each individual to live without material want, and therefore to choose how best they can realise themselves. This makes them free, and through this unbending equality, it is also just. THE PROBLEM is that, for Sartre and many others on the Left, communism required revolutionary violence to achieve because the existing order must be smashed.) And they were close friends at that time so instead of, I guess, TALK IT OUT like Sartre telling Camus „you know what ? I think the rebel was shit” and Camus being like „okay you epitome of hell” or just being like „we don’t have to agree on everything”, Les Temps Modernes – Sartre’s journal (it was edited by him) PUBLISHED LIKE FEW MOTHS AFTER THE LETTER a critical review of The Rebel - sold out three times over. And like it was year 1951 in which Sartre published just one work and it wasn’t successful BUT THE REWIEW FOR SURE WAS (Sartre’s diss track could be banger)

Anyways then Sartre wrote a public letter about Camus. He wrote that their friendship wasn’t easy but he’s gonna miss it AND THAT Camus is philosophically incapable ??

And that was a final straw so they never spoke to each other again.

BUT 15 years after Camus’s death Sartre was asked about their friendship AND Sartre said that Camus was probably his last good friend.

My conclusion is that if they were alive they would love mean girls (don’t ask me why.)

In case u didn’t read The Rebel or you don’t remember, in the book, Camus gave voice to a roughly drawn ‘philosophy of revolt’. This wasn’t a philosophical system per se, but an amalgamation of philosophical and political ideas: every human is free, but freedom itself is relative; one must embrace limits, moderation, ‘calculated risk’; absolutes are anti-human. Most of all, Camus condemned revolutionary violence. Violence might be used in extreme circumstances (he supported the French war effort, after all) but the use of revolutionary violence to nudge history in the direction you desire is utopian, absolutist, and a betrayal of yourself.)

[oh2e]

A (long) Collection of TTOI Quotes

He’s as useless as a marzipan dildo

I’m going to have to mop up a hurricane of piss here

He and Hewitt are tight as arse cheeks

‘How fucked am I? On the fuckometre?’ ‘Oh 12’ ‘yeah 12’ ‘out of what?’ ‘50’ ‘oh…. mine was out of 10’

Tiny little dick the size of a bookie’s biro

There’s no time to go home I’ll pass myself on the way back in

I can only cook with what I’m given. You give me Hugh Abbot I’ll give you bangers and mash, you give me Jerry from home office then I can raise it to fucking risotto and scallops

I am king of remembering my own password

‘Shagging your way to the top is it?’ ‘Yes well I’m not Scottish so I’ve got to get in somehow’

How much shit is on the menu and what flavour is it?

‘What do you want Malcolm’ ‘Two bits of tit. Two titties.’

Come the fuck in or fuck the fuck off

“What about just firing him at a wall from a cannon?” “I know we force feed him a mixture of garlic and Dettol in cup a soup” “What about the old red hot poker up the arse?” “I’d like to nail him to a tree through the head and watch lice slowing crawl over his body eating off all the flesh”

“Has security checked this [plant]?” “For little terrorists?”

This is the problem with the public - they’re fucking horrible

Not only was it a shit idea to ruin my holiday, it was a shit idea you stole from the government to ruin my holiday

Ah that’s like smoking dead skin that is

You’re the fucking shittest James Bond ever - you’re David Fucking Niven!

You’re like a sweaty octopus trying to unhook a bra

You take the piss outta [Al] Jolson again and I will remove your iPod from its tiny nano sheath and push it up your cock! Then I’ll plug some speakers up your arse and put it onto shuffle with my fucking fist

I thought you said no one reads these except political obsessives and mad Christians in wheelchairs but loads of people read mine

“I am not the story here” “Well no you kind of are though Malcolm, they spelled your name right and everything”

Come with me before I put your nuts in a book and squeeze them so hard that they come out like pressed fucking flowers

You’re The Ben….Ben Nevis…Bentally Ill…

Tickety fuckity boo

“Anyone seen Jamie?” “Oh don’t tell me he’s gone feral cos he was fucking terrifying when you had him on the leash.”

I’d love to stay and talk to you but I’d rather have type 2 diabetes

Mr Baby New Potato Head

It sucks cock so deep the bell end is wearing your appendix as a little hat

This is an operations room so unless you want your tonsils out by keyhole surgery from this key here, piss off!

Cliff Fucking Lawton! Nice. Was the Cilit Bang man not available?

To a guy who loses it so bad he needs a sat nav to find his own nipples

I’m feeling about as up to date as a Gregorian calendar

“You couldn’t organise a bum rape in a barracks.” “Au contraire”

You’re about as secure as a hymen in a south London comprehensive

Stop fucking blinking or I will take your optic nerve and fucking strangle you with it

Hanging round like a couple of school secretaries in the summer holidays

It’s like a prostate consultant’s waiting room in here

You will be sorry you inflatable cock!

I am going to have your intestines as a skipping rope and your lungs sundried and turned into a fucking waistcoat

Or will Dan Miller pull his scalp off and use it as an oven glove?

Enough of the pleasantries let’s just oil up and get fucking

A towel rail shouldn’t take up a whole wall, that’s not a towel rail it’s a climbing frame.

I’ve got a to-do list here longer than a fucking Leonard Cohan song

More on my plate than a spinster at a wedding

The only other candidate is my left bollock with a fucking smiley face drawn on it

Feels a bit like my head’s made entirely of smoke alarms

Fuck the Is and fist the Ts

May as well ask what I think of skirting boards, I’m sure we need them but I don’t know why

“No no I didn’t say that” “Well you sort of did with your face”

Let me row back a little bit, perhaps all the way back to the boathouse

She’s not bent either in the sense of being corrupt or being gay and by the way that’s an incredibly homophobic headline you massive poof

Omnishambles, from bean to cup you fuck up

I’m on my way to wipe my arse on pictures of Nick Robinson

“And I’m not doing terribly am I?” [Malcolm looking out the opposite window] “I love the way they’ve sandblasted here. It looks so clean.”

No no, don’t get up - I’m not viagra

He’s a fucking knitted scarf, he’s a balaclava.

The only thing John Duggan is doing here is depriving a village somewhere of a twat

You write almost entirely in generic meaningless buzzwords don’t you?

I will tear your fucking skin off, I will wear it to your mother’s birthday party, I will rub your nuts up and down her leg while whistling Bohemian Fucking Rhapsody

She’s behaving like a squirrel in a pedal bin.

Or I’ll have to tear my eyelids off and scrunch them up into fucking earplugs

I’m flypaper for dickheads

I think you’re wrong Malcolm you’re like a sultana in a salad

Sorry I can’t make espresso but I’ve made this so thick and black it’ll be like drinking fucking plimsoles

Well fuck a pot noodle. Sam, prepare my horse. I ride to DoSAC

The only fucking vibe you need to worry about is the one your wife hides in her knicker drawer

See you later and remember my door is always locked

* Tintin’s sexy sister to Ollie

What I really need is to shoot you all in the back of the head FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK. but I can’t because it’s illegal.

I reserve this level of anger for when I’m flying Ryanair

As about a strong defence as ‘the fertiliser in my homemade bomb was organic’!

She’s a fart in a frock and we both want her wafted out of here

She’s going to have to fall on her sword, which means that we’re going to have to stick one in the ground, trip her up onto it and get someone jump up and down on her back for ten minutes

She’s going to kick her own head in which’ll be easy because she does yoga

I’m looking for Mr Oliver Reeder? He looks a bit like a Quentin Blake illustration

“Is she fucked?” “Like Caligula’s favourite watermelon.”

Can I bring you a shot glass? And some bleach?

You can’t look a gift corpse in the mouth

“It’s over the fat lady’s singing” “No she’s not, the fat man from the go compare advert is talking”

I’ve got my cock out, it’s covered in breadcrumbs and the fucking pigeons are circling

Have I just stepped through a portal into a sausage machine because this is making mincemeat out of my head

Sit there and ogle me like a page three girl

I’m as busy as a two-twatted hooker

Now I have to step in your shoes but after you’ve shat in them

I don’t just take this fucking job home you know. I take this fucking job home, it ties me to the bed and it fucking fucks me from arsehole to breakfast then it wakes me up in the morning with a cupful of piss flung in my face then slaps me about the chops to make sure I’m awake enough to kick me in the fucking bollocks. This job has taken me in every hole in my fucking body.

Everything is fine I’m like lube at a funeral

If you pull off again I’m going to stick the meter so far down your throat you’ll be able to tell the price of your next shit

You closeted regency homosexual

It’s been a bit like renovating an old, old house. You can take out a sexist beam here, a callous window there, replace the odd homophobic roof tile, but after a while you realise […] the foundations are built on what I can only describe as a solid bed of cunts.

Shit in the couscous

[iluvshinytwink]

Class Distraction : Jude Bellingham

"It's just like seeing her for the first time again."

Scenario: Jude remembers during your senior high school days when he'd stare at you with those softened, helpless eyes of his. :)

Song: For The First Time by Mac Demarco

AN: sorry for not posting during wednesday, i had a 3 day long school event where all i did was talk shit with my friends, watch volleyball games where i almost died (5 times), play with cards (it got confiscated), eat food, complain how hot it was and wasted money, very productive if u ask me!!!)

The idea of school love in general has me weak in the knees bro, genuinely when is it my turn.

It was undeniable how much Jude adored you. Every time he was done with training all he would think about is that when he'd come back home he could stare and admire you until daylight. He would actually melt when he'd stare at you. A small smile would be on his face and his eyes were focused on your facial features, never blinking. This was a habit that you knew all too well, you knew about this habit as early as your highschool days.

This habit all started when you changed your seat. You and Jude remember when the two of you never talked to each other the first week of being seatmates. You'd look at the board and Jude.. well he looked at you. It's safe to say the both of you were nervous to talk to each other the first week and so Jude expressed that by obliviously staring at you.

The fourth period started and the teacher jotted down notes on the board. Time to time you looked up and down from your notebook to copy them. Jude was following your steps but his eyes stopped looking at the board and wandered to you. He felt his heart jump for a second as he took in your every action. Your eyes rhythmically look up and down, the way your pen glided down the paper. He felt his world stop for a moment. Your eyes lost its momentum and you took a glance at your seatmate.

Your eyes met his and a small smile appeared on your face. Jude's back instinctively straightened yet his eyes never left yours. You felt a chuckle escape your lips and your smile widened. Jude smiled at you warmly.

"Ahem." Your teacher coughed. "Continue your smiling later. This discussion will be added to your quiz on Wednesday." Your teacher smiled at the two of you as your classmates giggled. "We weren't--" Jude defended. "Don't be shy now, Jude." Your teacher smiled as she turned back to the board. You found yourself looking back at Jude and he looked back at you. A smile appeared your face as you held back a chuckle. Jude found himself forming a smile of his own before turning back to his notebook.

Moments like those were prime examples of why the two of you were stricken for each other. A simple glace which seemingly turns into an hour long stare-- brushing of hands which turn into clasped hands, whom never let go of each other. These were the moments that made your love strong.

"Jude! Are you even listening?" You called your to your boyfriend, waving your hand around his face. Jude blinked and he straightened his back. "Huh?" Jude mumbled. You giggled at your boyfriend. "You never change, do you?" You smiled warmly. Jude smiled at you back. "Guess so." He chuckled.

(time check: 11:37 pm.. lawdy lawd. This is kind of doodoo but ill post another tomorrow cause i miss getting my notifs bombed every time i wake up 💔💔 thank you for 104 followers!! Love and appreciate all of y'all! Thank you for letting me know that ur all delulu like me 💋 anyways make sure to SMASHHHH THAG LIKE BUTTON AND SUBSCRIBE FOR MORE BANGERS LIKE THESE!)

[garykingz]

Remember how Max hated how the races were treated like shows and all the concerts that were being featured at F1 events like they were merely quirky entertainment and not an actual sporting event?

Remember in Qatar last year when the drivers were passing in and out of consciousness due to the heat. George pulling his visor up to only be met with sand in his face. Lance saying he literally blacked out a few times. Fernando asking for water to be thrown on him whilst he was in the car.

Don't even get me started on that new rainbow road ass track they're going to build that looks so absolutely dangerous that people worry for their safety.

F1 isn't some TV show and it's shit like this movie that only brings more people into watching it with that mindset. These are athletes who jump into super engineered machines that go at insane high speeds and then race them.

"Who said anything about safety?" has left such a gross feeling in me every time I see that screenshot now. Safety is supposed to be one of the most important aspects of F1 and showcasing that it's not to an audience that has probably never watched a race before is... Idk. I don't like it.

You can argue it's just a movie and it's all done for dramatisation but if that was the case, why are the real drivers in the movie? They're being treated like they aren't there to do their job. Which is to actually drive.

Also fuck Brad Pitt.

If you wanted to make F1 fictional content. It is literally perfect; lore wise, animation wise, character development wise, and literally everything else, for anime or just regular animation. A netflix animated show would LITERALLY be a banger.

[orgxnas]

The Fellowship and their favorite Classic Frat Party Bangers™️

Frodo

No Hands by Waka Flocka Flame

This is pre-Ring Frodo, ofc

Y’all remember how he was dancing at Bilbo’s birthday? Yeah dude def likes to get down

I just feel like after he’s had a few drinks in him and this song comes on, he grabs Sam and loudly says “OMG ITS MY SOONNGGGG!”

Can sing the whole song with no breaks (just like me fr)

Sam

Everything by Pitbull

Sam actually doesn’t really like the music they play at parties. He thinks some of the lyrics are crass

HOWEVER

One time this song came on at a party that Rosie was at and she danced with him the entire song. He has not stopped thinking about it since

The next day he went straight to Merry (the Pitbull expert) and asked him what the song was called and then he immediately went and bought the song and listened to it everyday for the next two weeks

Now he requests it every time him and Frodo go out just in case Rosie is there

Pippin

Shots by Lil Jon

He is the Snooki of the Shire let’s be real here

Loves lil Jon. Thinks he’s a lyrical genius

He’s always up on the damn tables and the bar

“IF YOU AINT GETTIN DRUNK GET THE FUCK OUT THE CLUB” and Pippin took that personally

Spills his drinks on everyone. Gets into a verbal altercation bc of said spillage. Merry comes in to back him up. Now Frodo and Sam have to break up a fight

Merry

Hotel Room Service by Pitbull

Pitbulls no. 1 fan

Right up there on the tables with Pippin

Gets sooo hype for “WE AT THE HOTEL MOTEL HOLIDAY INN!”

Also spills his drinks but not as much

Has in fact been decked in the face for asking a girl if he could take her back to the hotel room for some *service*

Aragorn

Pepas by Farruko

This man has never gone to a party of his own accord. He has only gone just to make sure that Merry and Pippin don’t die

BUT once he’s got a few drinks in his system and this song comes on, he’s ready to let lose

I feel like he would love the Spanish songs (he can speak fluently I just know it)

Does his own lil dancy dance while Merry and Pippin cheer him on

Legolas records it for when he’s sober and they can all laugh about it

Legolas

Hips Don’t Lie by Shakira OR Promiscuous by Nelly Furtado

Oh he defff likes the “girlier” songs

Once he has enough in his system to get that lil tingle in his hands, bro is right in the middle of whatever dance circle formed around him

That man LOVES to flip his hair all over the place like he’s really got his hands in his hair feeling the music and everything

Learned all this from his father I just know that Thranduil made sure his son was properly educated

Gimli gives him shit for the entire night

Gimli

Get Low by Lil Jon

Oh bro definitely likes to get low

His drunk self gets SO HYPE when this song comes on

Climbs right up on the table with Merry and Pippin (falls off soon after)

The rest of the fellowship watches in absolute terror as he tears up the dance floor

Gandalf

Danza Kuduro by Don Omar

Will he dance? Who knows

But one thing for certain is that his heart is filled with so much joy watching the Hobbits go absolutely crazy for this song

He thinks it’s so fun and endearing watching them dancing and enjoying the night

It’s one of those simple things that he loves so much. Watching a group of friends enjoying each others company and celebrating their friendship with music and dancing

You know what he WILL dance let him get in the middle of that silly little circle

Boromir

DJ Got Us Fallin In Love by Usher

He may be daddy’s favorite, but being daddy’s favorite is stressful

At the end of the week, he just wants to cut lose and get drunk

And drunk he gets

He just likes to feel the musiiicccc

Has never gone home alone LMAO

[etrevil]

Do you mind if I ask your top 10 favorite characters (can be male or female) from all of the media that you loved (can be anime/manga, books, movies or tv series)? And why do you love them? Sorry if you've answered this question before.....Thanks....

So sorry for the late answer!

1. Athanasia de Alger Obelia (Who Made Me A Princess)

First hyperfixation, the manhwa I saw from start to finish. Art is just absolutely beautiful and I've been attached from the very start. Her character arc surrounding her father, Claude, had me clutching my pearls and sobbing my eyes out.

2. Dazai Osamu (Bungou Stray Dogs)

Strongest hyperfixation on the series yet. There's a certain feel I get whenever I see or read content about him. Do I relate to him? Concerningly. But it's the sort of connectedness I feel when reading what Odasaku thinks of Dazai and me agreeing and being called out half of the time lol. Lastly, he's just so pretty.

3. Chuuya Nakahara (Bungou Stray Dogs)

This man's backstory has me in a chokehold. He's gone through so much shit but, compared to other characters, he remains a "good" man. Such a complex character I can't get enough of tbh. Asagiri really paired the donut man and one of the most beautiful written characters together and I love it/pos. Lastly, also very pretty. Imagining him together with Dazai, whether platonic or romantic, is also a treat.

4. Wilbur Soot (dsmp, qsmp, general yt)

His content just, helped me get through quarantine. Also his songs are just bangers, and Lovejoy is one of my top favorite bands next to The Neighborhood.

5. Kim Dokja (Omniscient Reader's Viewpoint)

One of the first Korean novels I've ever read and finished. He is just such a well-done character, and ORV as a story in general should become a literary classic (in my humble opinion). The way he seeks comfort in a story and is willing to stay until its very end, I relate to that so much, and I just feel for this tragedy-surrounded man. I wish only the best for him and his company.

6. Cale Henituse (Trash of the Count's Family)

I remember reading the novel in its early stages and waking up for school, to then eat cereal and slowly finish reading what's been published in the dim light. Haven't touched the second book yet, but the first book was just, woah. Amazing. Rollercoaster ride. Our young lord really should start looking out for his health more, everyone's so worried.

7. Han Sooyoung (Omniscient Reader's Viewpoint)

Her story arc of being an antagonist, to the third member of their trio, and [spoiler], was an absolute blast. Her character was written with such a personality she touched my heart with her spunk and gentle care towards her friends. What she's done for KDJ is absolutely what tore my heart out. She deserves so much. They all do. Speaks even more to me since I'm a writer. Love her with all my heart <3.

8. Achilles (Greek Mythos, the Song of Achilles)

He amuses me. His rage, his reactions, the slaughter he made across the battlefield, and the way he eventually died. The fact we have historical evidence from a vase that people back then saw him rolled up into a blanket burrito during his sulking period. That he sent out one of his "closest" men in his own armory and grew enraged (understatement) when he returned as a corpse. I just, love him. Words cannot explain how I hold him, and Patroclus, to a high regard in my heart.

9. Tallulah (qsmp)

Best egg child to ever exist. Second is Chayanne. The admin for this character just stole us from the very start. Deserves a thousand bamboo flutes.

10. Ayna and Ranonthean (Secret Lady)

Might be considered cheating but these two are a couple and the toxicity cannot exist without the other. The slow unfurling of how their love story that led to the actual FL and ML's current predicament (read the story it's so good) absolutely rocked my shit. Like, omfg their children. Her family. Fate itself. I wanna sock Fate in the face. They're in love, but their love cannot thrive in a place like that. At least not for long. And it shows; the chapter this image is from, side story 11, has me by the throat. Banana-nim's art just makes everything better. They're relatively good for each other, but because of the situations forced on them, shit happens. Doomed by the narrative indeed.

Special manhwa couple mentions:

Angela and Rayburn, "I Stan the Prince"

Penelope and Callisto, "Death is The Only Ending for the Villainess"

Ines and Carcel, "This Marriage was Bound to Fail Anyway"

Shuri and Nora, "Stepmother's Marchen"

Eris and Anakin, "Kill The Villainess"

Raeliana and Noah, "Why Raeliana Ended Up at the Duke's Manor"

[apostleofthreedimensions]

Timeline

A timeline of every time a Spacelander has visited Flatland! Starting with...

Flatland's Year 0!

My friend @frau-line had the idea of a messiah and an apostle that fell in love and lived in Spaceland together. I also saw an idea for a god myth that included a picture of a sphere with a line orbiting around it and thought that that was a banger design for a god(s). Though I cant for the life of me find it now... its a small fandom I'll see it eventually.

With that out of the way, heres these two nameless but lovely ladies. I think at this point Flatland would be in like, caveman times or something, but the line is a fast learner and quickly absorbed all information that the sphere gave her.

As for Spacelands society, theyre far ahead of Flatland, but still not nearly as technologically advanced as they are in the film. Maybe like aztec times...?

Theyve just found Flatland and know exactly nothing about it. They sent the sphere to go check it out, and when she came back a month later they had a Flatlander with them.

They study the line and Flatland and they find out... something... that makes it so they set a concrete rule to only ever visit once every thousand years to impart knowledge upon the primitive Flatlanders.

I have no idea why they decide to do this every 1000 years. Perhaps the line dies shortly after her ascension to Spaceland (due to gravitational forces) and the sphere is heartbroken and bitter and shes like "Flatland is extremely fragile we must only interact with it rarely or we will FUCK UP and KILL things"

Year 1000

frau-line fuels this scenario and the next as well. Her ideas are some of the most interesting and compelling I've seen so its hard not to steal :P

The messiah of the Year 1000 wasnt exactly thrilled to do this job, but the first official visit was something highly anticipated and that he was specifically taught to do, so he studied hard and practiced well. He thought it easy and simple until, well...

Unfortunately, the year 1000 apostle must have been at least a little unhinged before enlightenment, so this messiahs mission went wildly off the rails. As soon as he finished his geometry homework, he started a massive country-wide riot, and martyred himself before anyone could ask what he was rioting for.

As for his shape I think he was either a hexagon or an octagon i cant remember im so sorry frau line 😖😖😖

Any fucking ways the messiah is like

And he has some like. Idk not trauma, but he is a little fucked up by it and thinks he should have taken it more seriously or whatever. Who cares though

Year 2000

Saturnius and Areia. Thanking frau-line every day for creating these guys, their plot is so captivating and I have a huge soft spot for Ariea specifically.

Saturnius is a noble sphere prince that takes his job deathly seriously, and Areia is a low class line determined to spread the gospel no matter the cost. The cost ends up being a holy war that is far more destructive than the year 1000 apostle could have even imagined...

Nothing I could say about them could live up to Suovetaurilia, so please give it a read!

Year 3000

You know who these guys are.

Year 4000

Finally, my home grown boys!

Xerxes is very lacking in the self confidence department and is trying to be the best most effective messiah to date to prove himself. His hopes are shattered when he happens to pick Claude, an average pentagon working an average 9-5 job, who doesn't give a singular shit about the third dimension at all. Xerxes doesn't give up easily, and secretly interacts with Claude even after the millennial visit in order to convince Claude to become an apostle. Unfortunately, it turns out Claude is just as stubborn.

...And thats all I have! This is all just my personal headcanon, so I'd really love to hear what you all think the timeline looks like!!

[autisticlancemcclain]

fic rec friday 1

welcome the the first fic rec friday! where, on friday, i rec five of my favourite fics.

1. Blast Zone by @mareepicurean

In the middle of a mission, a bomb going off leaves Lance unable to hear. Still, while he's deaf, the rest of his team are the ones that won't listen.

This is one of my voltron fics ever. I’ve read it regularly since it came out in 2017, and it was one of the big inspirations of my deaf lance fic. The fic does a really good job of team hurt/comfort and Lance’s insecurities without making the team weirdly evil. An awesome fic that I highly recommend. (Also, there’s some excellent Shiro & Lance!)

2. Perishing Pearls by @ohcontrary

A training session with the team goes awry when Lance has to spar against Allura, who's wielding her new whip. The mere sight of it raises ghosts he'd much rather forget.

This one is also heavy on the angst, although fair warning: it mentions past child abuse, so tread carefully. The fic is handles complicated family dynamics and grief really well. It is a great established klance hurt/comfort fic. 

3. How To Train Your Galra by magisterpavus [EXPLICIT]

“Shiro, I fucked up,” Keith blurted, wringing his hands.

Shiro paused mid-punch, shooting him a quizzical look. “What? What happened?”

“I think,” Keith whispered, “I think I accidentally roofied Lance. With my dick.”

This series is the walking proof that 2016 fics hit different. Should 14 year old me have been reading it? Probably not. It’s hugely NSFW, so definitely proceed with caution, but it’s a banger and has a lot of good banter, team as family, enemies to lovers, exes to lovers, and more. Honestly a lot of fun and a lot of face-palming, just remember to heed the tags.

4. If It Ain’t Broke by @overlymetaromantic

A 5 plus 1: Five times Lance takes a hit for the team, and one time the team takes a hit back.

There’s this specific scene in this fic (it’s a bit of a spoiler) where Lance is getting shit from a worried team, who’s upset about him continually putting himself at risk, someone asks “Even if it means putting yourself at risk?” and Lance doesn’t even hesitate before saying “Yes!” It’s such an easy description of Lance’s character that it makes me emotional every time. 

5. Medic Lance by Fullmetal_Bitch

Multi-chap ft. my headcannon that Lance is the team's unofficial medic. Basically, it's a 5 + 1 of Lance helping the others when they're hurt and them helping him, just with a couple extra chapters. Story is so much better than this summary, I swear.Story is complete but the chapters did get revised so let me know whether you reckon it reads smoother now!

Medic Lance my beloved, truly. I feel like it fits him so well, especially as the Blue Paladin. This also has really good BAMF Lance, and Lance interacting with all the lions! Amazing, longer story. 

that’s it for today!! i’ll see y’all back next friday for the next fic rec post!!!

[littlebetesofeverything]

Welcome to Night Vale Ep 23

Well, that happened. Honestly, I'm not sure what the next few years are gonna be like, but my therapist reminded me to take some time and think about the present. Not sure how well I can do that, but I can listen to Cecil and try to wind down with him. So let's do that!

You report everything, Cecil. And we love you for it.

Koshek the cat sounds adorable. Awww, he's a mom now too. Can I have one of the kittens?

I missed that HR was some unknown entity. Wait we have an oracle in the station? COOL!!

ewwww, Boy Scouts. Yeah it would suck to be eternally a boy.

Why do all these things happen in the pit outside Ralphs? Not a complaint. Just, is it like Denny's?

Death a meritocracy sounds incredible, ngl. Yeah, the government shouldn't decide who gets to die. I vote against making death universal.

"When I die, I want to have earned it." Another banger. I also feel like this right now.

Mayor vomiting balloons sounds like not the worst thing to happen to children. The first being clowns luring them to sewers

Aww I like that they get some celebration before the pit.

All hail the glow cloud. they know what's up with soda. Love the death traps. The salt will make up for the sugar.

Missile silos seem like an unsurprising thing in Night Vale. Listen, sometimes hypnotism is the answer.

How much human control is there in the ceremony? Just asking for a friend. Yeah, you should be terrified Scoutmaster. I know a lot of confusing feelings. Dude, how many dudes have a crush on Cecil and how many have been disappointed since Carlos moved to Night Vale?

yes, life IS terrifying Cecil. Never forget that.

I'm cackling that it was an ad for Six Flags in DESERT BLUFFS. LMAO

yes, calm will help a bleeding crisis. That is certified medicine. Says a medical student who is studying clotting medications.

Do the birds correlate to the kids fleeing the tent? Secret police saying something is creepy should be certifiable. Cecil, you have 5 in the booth? thoughts and prayers.

of course, you go to the weather right now.

Is everyone safe and sound? of course aren't the threat, they just attack and drag people away. Oh, I guess only 12 people dead isn't too much to worry about.

RIP Harlan, your scouts will remember you. Even Cecil will miss you.

yeah, that sounds like an ETERNAL scout, to be preserved in a glass case.

Welp, good night Night Vale. And good night to the rest of you. Remember, if you see me blogging shit after I say good night, no, you didn't.

[be-the-glenn-to-my-maggie]

Have you thought about a Locorro Omegaverse AU?? May be in modern Au or Na'vi

You motherfuckers can NOT be doing this to me. You can notttt be sending me omegaverse asks r u joking me.

OBVIOUSLY gun to my head I fucking love omegaverse it's the funniest invention of all mankind and I will read every fic out there possible with any of my otps... (feel free to peruse my What does it say about me that I find a/b/o fics so funny and fascinating anyways here are the bangers collection ONLY if you are 18+ and you like well-written, bizarre, and sometimes disturbing shit because when did we as a society let the omegaverse get away with being considered normal?).

But anyways I have to be honest I have never considered it for locorro, it's always such an inherently sexual concept, as evidenced by the 18+ of that collection lol. But lets give it some pg-13 thought (pls feel free to jump right on my throat if my specific omegaverse understanding is different than yours, there's a fucking bee version now guys I can't win them all):

-We will stay Na'vi, because I feel like it would be interesting and would fit oddly well in their culture.

-I do think Lo'ak would be an alpha he's way too hot-headed and emotional not to be. Like I said in some other post, he just feels things too much and when he's little the feelings are too big for him. He just overloads and has to throw massive tantrums lol. Only made worse by any bullying and insecurity he feels about his human traits

-I think Spider would be a beta, he has calming energy. I always see him as someone everyone can talk to, he gives great advice and he's everyones favorite listener. That's one of the many reasons he slips through the cracks; he puts everyone else first emotionally. He's always so focused on everyone else around him that he forgets about himself. Totally exacerbated by judgement from the Omaticaya and just being small enough to escape notice and stay out of sight.

-I think Kiri would be a beta too and that her and Spider together have an UNMATCHED vibe like it's impossible to be in a bad mood near them.

-They balance Lo'ak out real well, and its one of the reasons the three of them get along so well. He pushes them to actually do things and have fun and they chill him the fuck out.

-As early as he can remember Lo'ak's favorite people were Spider and Kiri. He loves Neteyam and his parents, sure, but they just aren't Spider and Kiri. They don't get Lo'ak, not quite like Spider and Kiri do, and they can't make him feel understood before he gets angry, frustrated, or hurt.

-Eventually this evolves to Spider just being Lo'ak's favorite person. He cannot pinpoint when the change occurred, because it wasn't exactly linear, but one day Spider was going swimming with Tuk and Kiri was forced to go hunting with Neteyam and Jake and Lo'ak wasn't even torn at all deciding who to join; even though Tuk is a monster and hunting is awesome.

-I think it's real hard for the parents not to notice, like it's pretty clear from day one that the three are so close and interconnected that Spider has to be right for one of them, they are family. It just gets clearer with time which it is.

[vinxwatches]

watching good omen season 1

ep 1 pilot

haven't seen a lot of it, mostly that people like it, that it's made by people people really like and that it's gay (or at least people make it gay) so you know, good pick for me. and i just watched to animations/animatics on youtube with bad endings and bad endings fuck me up, so hopefully this is happier. intro is a fucking banger. also god has a fem voice? nice. accurate skin colour for the earliest humans. not surprised, but appreciated. making fun of theology and great banter? i love it.

ominous picnic basket. oh... actually quite biblically fitting it seems. i REALLY hope they don't expect me to remember these names too well. many of the characters seem fun though.

of course the american politician says bs like "a regular y chromosome son". which i'm sure has not been tested as you 1: don't know the gender yet. 2: phenotype does not denote genotype.

i wonder who and how they'll figure out who has the wrong baby. "i don't recall what horror of history we had a lunch over, but i do recall what we had." the BEST dynamic.

will they even figure out they got the wrong one? ok, i know that working with an actual 5 year old would be a nightmare... but that kid is like 12.

well done making both heaven and hell look like shit. do you want grime overpopulating or empty, liminal, office spaces?

brilliant end of episode 1.

ep 2 the book

damn the forces of hell are so bloody rude and evil. and so many quick jokes.

question: what are the 4 horsemen of the apocalypse supposed to be in christianity? both biblically and in modern belief? they are separate from devils and angels.

i love a witch that also uses an ipad in her rituals.

"sorry, right number" seriously the humour in this show is so brilliant. i really hope the story is able to match it.

ep 3 hard times

a black knight shrugging is way too funny. i love these two. just two old friends helping each other out, it's just that that's diametrically opposing one another. the angel doing some tempting, the demon some miracles. and upper management doesn't care.

awh, they are just so cute together.

excuse me you are playing intro now? 28 minutes in? that's not an intro. that's a bloody intermission!

they really succeed at making heaving seem so extremely bad. extremely wide shot or extreme close-up. it's so incredibly uncomfortable.

the prime minister has a nice flat chested fucker in his bed.... good for him if he's not cheating.

"mend it all"/"end it all" whispers. really neat.

ep 4 saturday morning funtime

of course he was condemned for nothing more then asking questions.

ah, they got rid of pestilence to replace them with pollution. it's a good change, but feels pretty pre 2020.

oh no, i find his death so sad. he had a love, why kill him? i know the apocalypse is coming but still.

i still really hope that the presidents son turns out to be trans to just break the things he said at the start. then again it wouldn't really work as it's not the kids he said it about. idk, i guess i hope of screen son turns out to be trans to spite the person that'll never know... yea i'm holding out hope for something that doesn't matter.

azi being send to heaving is SO bad. his bookshop possibly burning down is emotionally worse. it was going to be the last episode of the day. but i started watching because i couldn't deal with bad endings, so i guess i'll have to watch one more.

ep 5 the doomsday option

Azi going full rogue (finally).

man that's the most obvious cold reading ever.

the guard reads a neil gaymen book. cute.

sir... your car is... more then a little on fire.

ep 6 the very last day of the rest of their lives

are we doing a flash back episode for the last episode of the season?

oh, please let him rebuild the car just like i want the bookshop rebuild?

the way to defeat the end of the world is to believe and stand (and i hope work) for a world that wouldn't end. a bit on the nose but very nice.

and of course with Terry Pratched being involved death is not to be defeated, just not hastened along.

a kid not doing the one thing they were supposed to do.... there's a trans/gay message in there. also That's Just What Kids Do! you wanted an 11 year old to do what they were told? that's the first part of the problem.

for a TV series that's a pretty good satan. oh that is SO clever. kind of time fucking, but not really so long as you never introduce time travel so it's only true from now on. oh, is it a nicer ending then i though? YES IT IS! \o/

it "ends" as it starts: with a garden and an apple. ok, make it more explicit why don't you.

oh, you subtle bastards. i love it. other scene's now make more sense too, oh how i love it.

ok, yea it makes sense people go wild over this as it's really bloody great.

[daincrediblegg]

okay your turn if nobody else has asked: TOP FIVE JH CHARACTERS GO

... girl... how does one choose? how does one??? when there are so many beautiful boys??? ok. OK I'll give it a shot.

5. Captain Crow - The Sea Beast This film is just incredible on every front. One of my favorite concept artists worked on it (which I did not know until a few weeks ago but now that I know I feel like kicking myself because I REALLY SHOULD HAVE KNOWN THEIR STYLE WELL ENOUGH BY NOW). But I remember watching this, and screaming when the credits began to roll because WAIT?!?!?! THAT WAS JARED HARRIS??? OH!!! WHAT A DELIGHT!!! I LOVE THAT GUY!!!! (oh babygirl wait a few months it's gonna hit you so bad). He's great. I hope we see more of him in the sequel that would be great for me.

4. Hari Seldon Honestly. What a little shit. "But Egg," you might ask "If he's such a little shit why is he on here?" well. He's hot. Really I am not over how hot this dude is. I know I couldn't fix him not in a million years. But idk. Something about him always makes my brain go brrr. So he's on here. Also I just love how fucking atypically written this show is and I have a wee soft spot for asimov. They didn't have to cast Jared as Hari and make him unbelievably hot. But they did. And he's so enigmatic. I love that.

3. John Lennon Egg's love for Jared Harris Origins. I was a Beatles girlie, ok? I'm not ashamed to admit that. It was my introductory fandom experience at the ripe old age of baby, and I really ate it up. I remember going into this movie being like "oh it's some dumb TV movie about John and Paul how good can it be?" Very good, as it turns out. And having assigned myself a John Lennon girlie I literally could never get over this depiction. The mannerisms, the fucking tripped-out way he philosophizes in conversation, the softness, and ofc the old friends tension. Jared got it all. Of course I'd seen him in stuff here and there, but this was the one that cemented him as a beloved actor in my mind for me (I literally re-wound the kiss scene as well like 20 times don't judge me but that awakened some stuff in me). Been following him ever since.

2. Lane Pryce - Mad Men This dude broke me for real. I didn't get into Mad Men until college, and binged it all on my friend's hulu account. And lemme tell ya. Did NOT see his final episode coming. Did not. And it made me genuinely weep. He was a highlight in the show. He was one of the only guys I could actually say is a good dude in that show, and he deserved so much better than he got in the end. I look at him and I'm just like... leave ur wife. Leave your job. Lets just go out of this capitalistic hellscape. I want to make him Well. I will love him forever for how he just completely destroyed me.

1.Francis Crozier / Valery Legasov - HA! you thought I was not going to tie them? WRONG! I can't keep these bad bitches apart.

Francis really needs no explanation at this point. I am so actually genuinely in love with him I'm writing a whole ass gothic romance novel of a fic for him, as you all know (and which has summarily turned out a BANGER of a modern AU as well). I made a bloody self-insert oc for him. Gothic Cinema is literally my favorite genre and Francis is the most Gothic Hero of all time, honestly (well besides Valery obviously). The serotonin he continually gives me makes my meds redundant. He is my sweet husband who I love with my whole life and that's that.

And Valery? sorry you can't put a babygirl of a man like that in front of me and not expect that I would want to jump his bones like? Not only is the constant existential dread relatable, but as much as people tell him he's not brave, he IS without a doubt, and honestly, just by virtue of uttering the most iconic logline ever fucking created he deserves this spot on this list. Both of these dudes make my soul ascend in a certain way not just with how brilliantly they were written, but with how incredibly Jared executed them (for which I want to kill the academy for not giving him awards on either). Top Beloveds forever and ever and ever amen.