#it kinda makes it worse💀
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I’m pretty sure this is a hot take/unpopular opinion in the Toffee fandom, but I’ve never been the fan of the theory/assumption that Toffee was framed for Comet’s death
I fully admit that the plot point was most likely thrown in there to completely demonize him in the eyes of the audience and make us sympathize with Moon (making his death more “deserved” (HEAVY airquotes) for general audiences), and it does feel random and out of character, but when you think about it, it does make sense why he’d be the culprit. You have to dig but he has at least two canon supported reasons for why he’d kill Comet Butterfly.
Now this isn’t commentary about if Toffee is taking orders from Seth, that’s a whole other conversation, but this is simply about the theory that Toffee didn’t have any part in her death (someone else did it) and he’s innocent of all charges.
I completely empathize with the theory, especially because the show demonizes him so much already and it’s just another scoop to add to the pile of “evil” he’s been boiled down to by the show, but Toffee was no doubt in my mind the one who made that blow on Comet.
And he’s SO fucking proud of himself too
“Hello Princess” HE LITERALLY GIVES MOON SUCH A SASSY LOW BLOW.
#svtfoe#star vs the forces of evil#toffee of septarsis#comet butterfly#toffee svtfoe#comet svtfoe#comet the chef#opinion#kinda hot take#I will say this theory is very cool in aus#I always love looking at aus#I’m mainly talking canonically here#I feel like someone might ask me about the the reasons he killed comet#and I’m lowkey scared because I’ve never publicly shared my comet opinions#I don’t like comet 😭#also just because I say he did it#doesn’t mean I say it’s good he did it#it was still the wrong move no matter how valid he was#killing the monarch won’t solve monster racism#it kinda makes it worse💀#though she would’ve made it worse too#I digress
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my half sister is 13, and she's a huge asshole to her parents, always screaming at them and breaking things. her parents say that it's bc of puberty, and my father keeps asking if i was like her at that age, and i'm like, no, man, i was generally well behaved, but i was also suicidally depressed and struggling with an ed, so
#ofc i cant say that but like#just bc we are both his daughters we didnt have the same experience#ffs ive been my moms relationship therapist and emotional dumpster since i was like 12#(i just finished a call with her where she talked about the shit her bf does and i remembered for how long ive been giving her advice 💀)#this is not healthy but still i cant imagine having zero empathy and love for my mother#ofc we had fights and i was a jerk to her on occasion but most of the time i felt super guilty for making her life harder#and not trying to make things even worse#also my father and his wife kinda suck so i can see why my sister is like this#✩‧₊˚
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I'm gonna have to work on my final project non stop for like a month straight bc I procrastinated on it too much fuck my stupid baka life
#.txt#also I have to do a movie pitch for it bitch it's an amv with intentionally one dimensional characters 😭 tf do I even say about it#at least the characters are like. knockoff jaime and tommen so its almost like im drawing asoiaf fanart#unfortunately I've come to hate them. the knockoffs I mean#I wanna change the designs a bit so they dont resemble my blorbos as much. i think im gonna give the kid darker hair#ok well discount jaime just looks like him with 2 hands and a blue cape 💀and I cant change him atp#my worst mistake was giving him like. a solid metal skirt armor thing bc its a pain in the ass to animate#at the start of the year I had the most work done out of everyone how did this happen#its bc they started nitpicking the story and I kinda lost motivation to work on it lke this shit is stupid. and cringe#by they I mean the extra screenwriting teachers we had a couple lessons with which like. this is an animation course not a writing course#I'd get it if it was like. a full time school but we have 2 3 hour classes a week we dont have time for this shit man#ig my mistake was that my idea didn't start from the story it started from the song I wanted to make a cool music video for it#its not that the story is nonsensical or anything its just a very basic fairytale esque thing nothing groundbreaking#'but you're not SAYING anything with this' I'm not trying to omg just let me make my little amv :(#does everything need a plot twist or to subvert expectations is it not enough that it looks cool#there's a couple people who are worse off than me in terms of how much they've done but also theres a couple that are nearly done#looking at them like god I wish that were me.....#and also I think I accidentally overwrote a shot I worked on for 3 hours. killing myself#maybe I can restore a previous version but its on the school computer and the school is closed for a week so im not gonna know until then
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"cal's not even that much of an alcoholic like i won't liken it to an illness that runs in the family if it's not that bad in the first place c'mon now" me before remembering the insane drunk driving and gay bar shenanigans
#but listen. what's funnier is that i was like . i know that well and they're like us in that sense‚ like thematically it's there but not to#a ruinous degree. dyouknowwhatimean some people get the shivers and lose their jobs and fucking‚ die. so let's not get carried away#but then i remembered heartbeat by red 7 and it's like. wait that's kinda bad.. and then i thought okay then he's worse#and THEN i remembered my dearest father does literally that 💀💀💀 girl. omg my dumb ass.. omg.....#anyway the drunk driving fandom is dying reblog to make it die faster#kata.txt#euphoria
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“i love writing blorbo from my shows but it’s so hard because their neuroses are inscrutable” skill issue get more neurotic
#i jest of course i do not actually advise getting worse on purpose#it’s just funny hearing people say this kinda thing cause like.#to me the character being messed up in the head makes their thought patterns more intuitive not less 💀#mars speaks
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love word, gdocs and grammarlly are all no match for my dyslexia 🤦🏼♀️ the struggle is so real 😅
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🤧🐀🌧️🌊
#need to clear my head;#im in such a bad mood. my face is in a perpetual angry state. im just so so bitter nd pessimistic rn#trying not to get stuck in negative chaos thought spirals nd to just take it as it come#nd be patient bc recovery takes time i know. but i havent been able to feel healthy or functional for 7 months nd i am so tired#i cant help but worry abt my health nd what kinda diet i can have nd how to work all of that out.#like the removal of the gallbladder dont ensure a good digestive system. they remove it bc it can irrepairably hurt u#also im so so stressed out abt school nd my courses. i already had to drop one last week. nd it isnt looking like i'll be able to pass my#eng class.. it just isnt looking like it's realistic at all :/ i personally dont mind if i fail. but i can get issues w my wellfare hmm#bc like im still feeling rough nd u only get sick leave for one week after surgery.. so i have to go on thursday nd friday but im gnna#be in pain plus be so hungry nd be unable to concentrate idk#idk idk!! im already willing to take out loans to finish my upper secondary school.. but i have to make it work w timing nd stuff so im not#sitting here unable to pay rent or the bills or food lmao. so idk have to fix it somehow#nd the pressure of this country rapidly declining state is stressing me tf out!! having nazi conservative rightists in the ruling is just#dreadful!!!! for many reasons but atm idek if i can do distance classes like i wanted to ://#i just.. wanna be able to go for my long walks. go to the gym. eat normally. have coffee. study nd finish highschool.#then apply for whatever program i can nd move to another calmer city. prob eventually find a path to move to another country. like norway..#im thinking too much but my thoughts are spinning nd killing me like i cant stop it im so scared nd anxious lmao 💀#im also trying to be brave and write to the psych clinic for personality disorders nd be upset nd 'beg' them for help ksksksks.#but like... the thing abt having avpd is that i kinda dont wanna bc im scared of the possibility of them helping me lol#im just in a low place nd bad headspace and it's just getring worse nd im getting more nd more tired#i dont have much more energy to keep it together nd pretend like im ok or like i have hope lmaoooo idk what to do#anyway... idk idk guess i just gotta .. keep crawling forward anyway i can
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I love my cat sm
#💭 — ⌗nervo rambles . ★#tw vent#putting that there .....#but I went down a negative spiral and whenever I do that gender dysphoria kicks my ass#and Tuxiedo wasn't on my bed so all I could do was hold on to my plush and cry#but I felt him come and jump up on my bed from my window#and I turned around and he pretty much immediately came to lay on my chest#ik that he doesn't know something/someone putting weight on my chest rlly helps me when I get like this#(it helps with me not feeling hyper aware of my chest and is just a general comfort thing for me that rlly only my cat does)#but just having him do that comforted me a whole lot#and since he got off I'm just hugging said plush to my chest to try and help#which it does#but it's also led to me not being able to move even an inch bc I always get hyper aware of my chest#It always happens#I stay frozen when it gets rlly bad and I just just wanna throw up my insides and rip my hair out sometimes and I just hold my plush close#too much? probably#I get kinda violent to myself with my thoughts#very gorey would not recommend#but I'm not gonna say them in detail here#but yeah Tuxiedo getting up and comforting me was rlly nice#I love him :33#and my bad for getting negative on main fellas 🙏🙏#need to shower but who knows if that'll make my current horrendous gender dysphoria worse#(it will bc I have to look at myself in the mirror every time I go to get in the shower and I get sick just looking at myself)#also Over & Over by Rio Romeo rlly had to start playing during this 💀💀#“Over and over I fuck myself over” lyric hitting more than usual 💔💔
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incredibly stressed n tired n been on the verge of tears for most of the day but i truly just do not want to exist for a couple of weeks lol
#i’m at the end of my rope babes#so much to do and i never really addressed the burnout this last year lmaooo#also my mother is blocking every attempt for me to invite family to my graduation this may#and it’s stressful bc people will need to make plans like. now.#but she has all the fucking contact info locked away and won’t give addresses to me besides the few numbers i have#so it’s kinda just like sjdjdkkdk what’s the point rn#feeling very isolated and sad and idk what to do lol#like what is the point of all this work i’m putting in shdjjdkd i already know where i’m going in the fall#and it’s not like anyone will be around to see it 💀 this is not gonna matter in like 3 months 💀#feel like i need a good cry but also. idk how people find crying cathartic sjdjkdkd it just makes me feel worse lol#plus the [redacted] is hitting hard lately so i just physically feel like shit all the time#literally so fucking done rn shdjjd
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Idk what the fuck it was, but one time when I was laying down on the couch i was having a laughing fit at some random video and suddenly got a really sharp pain in my chest, right below my right breast but it wasn't muscle pain, I felt it inside my ribcage. It got worse when I tried to move my ribs, I couldn't stand up because it hurt when I folded my body in or when I stretched my back. I remember I was really scared cause I've felt that kinda pain before but that time it kept going for a while, it must've been 10-15 minutes before it calmed down.
I didn't go to the doctor cause my mom thought it wasn't a big deal so to this day I have no idea what it was.
hey i’m nosy
there’s uuuuh obviously a lot i could’ve listed, so pick whichever category’s closest
#ngl I kinda fucking hate my mom for that#I thought I was having a heart attack or something and she told me to calm down and stop scaring her#bitch i thought I was gonna die I'm not gonna calm down so i don't hurt your feelings piss off#I do also have chronic pain so that's a nice point of comparison Ha Ha#there was also this one time where I overworked my muscles at a pool and that night my body hurt so much I couldn't sleep and I cried a lot#That one was probably worse but it didn't make as much of an impact on me psychologically cause I knew I wasn't gonna die or anything 💀
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My vibe is just that one Curb Your Enthusiam gif of the guy making faces cause I'm thinking about why this happened (overwhelming political illiteracy in the US where people vote for candidates bases on charm and vibes over legitimate policy) and I'm like. Well. Guess all my musing about whether I should become a teacher in this economy is being both reinforced and harmed by the current situation ://////
#shut the heck up#about hecks hecking life#people say going to college is radicalizing because u meet radical people#as an already radical person meeting the unradicalized people has been making me worse dhhdhd#i talked to a girl who said she was on the fence but leaning trump and she barely agreed with him#trumps policies are not popular people just dont like harris' *vibe*#they hate establishment liberalism and honestly based but far right populism is nawt it#but they dont really get that 💀#tag talking#i need to be a better woke gay teacher than my current sociology teacher who suckss!!!!#no one learns anything till i open my mouth in that class christ#need to get payed for that kinda blabbering
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POV: you wake up in the middle of your own autopsy with force powers then immediately get brainwashed into falling to the dark side
I was reminded of the fact that I haven’t drawn inquisitor!fives’ autopsy scars in way too long so here I am, delivering a few too many Fives 💀
Anyway I know I don’t post much about the AU on here so props to anyone who knows what’s going on here even slightly, I’ve decided to nerf siren!echo (who WAS part of this AU yes I know quite random) but since him being turned into a siren kinda limits what I can do with him story wise he is now an AU of the AU.
That means the name I came up with for the au (dead mean walking/swimming or dmw(s) as I’ve been tagging it) is kinda irrelevant. I’ll just call this the inquisitor fives AU but if you have any AU name suggestions feel free to drop them.
Here are some of the major factors of the AU:
It gets worse before it gets better
(WARNING: there are quite a few heavy topics covered in the AU such as torture, dehumanisation and su*cidal thoughts, so pls read at your own discretion)
- fives wakes up in the middle of his own autopsy with force sensitivity, then gets brainwashed into falling to the Dark Side by Palpatine. As an Inquisitor, he does not remember anything about his life because those memories were blocked by Palpatine.
- Palpatine discovers that Fives is essentially immortal, and any injuries inflicted on him will heal no matter how bad.
- when echo gets rescued from skako minor, he is recalled to Kamino for experimentation, first of all so they can figure out what the Techno Union did to him, second of all to see how he survived his injuries. Nala se, who knows that fives came back to life, theorises that since he and echo were tube twins they share the “immortality”. He is kept on Kamino for VERY extensive experimentation where terrible things happen to him (cough vivisection cough lobotomy) and so never joins Clone Force 99 even if he did work with them on Anaxes.
- Fives in this time is sent out on many missions by Palpatine that involve him unaliving many people, and after the rise of the Empire he hunts a few Jedi.
- Fox, who throughout the war had experienced many blackout missions where he woke up afterwards covered in blood, is the last living Coruscant Guard commander. (Thorn dies, stone vanishes one day, Thire mistakes Vader for a Jedi and pays the price) Despite the best efforts of his son secretary Dogma (no way!?) Fox has very little will to live, is extremely depressed and borderline suicidal, he would like nothing more than to bite the dust, but still feels he has a duty to the very few remaining corries and so tries to keep it together (he is failing)
- one day Palpatine decides he doesn’t need Fox to do his bidding anymore since he has much better assets at his disposal (Fives), and decides it would be ironic to sic his pet clone inquisitor onto Fox. Fives still doesn’t remember anything, and only knows that Fox is responsible for the main scars on his body and believes fox is the reason he doesn’t remember most of his life, and so sets out to kill fox. They battle it out (ref to that one animation wip I posted) and fives is on the verge of killing fox (who didn’t really try to fight that much, like I said he would very much like to die and dying at the hand of the vod he “killed” seems fitting to him) when he gets a sudden vision of echo.
- all fives knows is echo is extremely important to him and must be rescued and that snaps him out of palpatine’s control. He knows he probably can’t rescue echo alone, and since fox has already been betrayed by the empire he decides “fuck it” and basically kidnaps fox and they run. They make a deal, that once echo has been found, Fives will put Fox out of his misery (fox feels that fives should be the only person to kill him, and only goes along with the plan because he refuses to let anyone else kill him)
- fox and fives proceed to go on an intergalactic road trip to “rescue echo” even though neither of them know how to do that. They become closer friends throughout, and fives slowly regains bits and pieces of the Before
- meanwhile during the destruction of Kamino, the bad batch stumble on echo and rescue him and he stays with them for a little bit before leaving with Rex
- meanwhile Dogma helps the rest of the remaining Corries desert, kills too many storm troopers, and tries to go after his buir fox and the bastard inquisitor who kidnapped him
This is the main stuff you need to know for the AU haha so if you’ve got new name suggestions I’m all ears ty!!
#dmw(s)#back in black AU#dead men walking AU#my art#star wars#star wars the clone wars#the clone wars#star wars art#star wars tcw#sw tcw#tbb echo#arc trooper echo#star wars au#inquisitor fives#inquisitor#force sensitive fives#fox and fives#tcw fives#clone trooper fives#arc trooper fives#fives#star wars alternate universe#clone wars fanart#star wars clone wars#clone wars#clone wars au#commander fox#domino twins
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good pls make tea i hope your cough goes away kat! i saw :(((((( i hope you can get some rest soon!! sending you hugs and warm blankets
update i decided to just skip both my classes tmrw bc its almost 3am im not even SLEEPY and my cough has lead to a headache 🥲 that was tmi and unnecessary in regard to ur well wishes (which i am very thankful for btw) but yes i do hope ir goes away soon 😭😭
#decembermoonskz#i need to wake at 7am if i hope to get to my first class in time and its cold i the morning now#so like thats not gonna help my cough either so im kinda like#might as well just not go to class 😭😭😭 idk it makes sense ib my head im jsut badly explaining it#and yeah ive been sick since last week and it was better this past monday#like i didnt even cough that much and the whole week i didnt develop any other symptoms#BUT TODAYYY / tuesday bc technically its wednesday rn#im gettin the runny nose and my cough is worse and the headaches ARCGHHHHJ#sorry im highkey just ranting bc ya girl has SHIT TO DO PEOPLE TO SEE#WHY NOW OF ALL TIMESSSSSSSS#ily izzy <3<3#ive also lowkey kinda given up on trying to sleep#and am instead trying to tire my eyes out so i can sleep 💀#kat answers
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Cuddle/Sleep Headcanons 💤🌙
Pairing(s): characters x Gn!reader
Character(s): Percy, Jason, Leo, Frank, Hazel, Annabeth, Piper, Calypso, Ethan, Nico, Octavian, Reyna
Percy Jackson
He’s a horrible sleeper
I mean sure, you can sleep and cuddle like the couple you are
However, that doesn’t stop him from sleeping wildly
Limbs sprawled all over the freaking place and the only reason you know is because of the concerning amount of times you’ve woken up under some of them
To make it worse?
He’s a blanket hogger
He doesn’t rlly hog it in the sense that he steals it all
I mean he does, but he sorta just slides off the bed and takes the rest of the blanket with him
The urge to just ����
But yea 😞
Nice to cuddle with but not to sleep with sorry not sorry
6/10
Jason Grace
Kinda stiff ngl
Like damn bitch, you live like this?
Plus he sleeps on his back face up 😭😭😭
Like wtf Jason
Are u ok?
In terms of actually cuddling, he’s pretty good
His arms are firm and his hugs are tight yet comforting
Plus he smells pretty good
Like no joke
I’d kinda see you sleeping on his chest since bro sleeps on his back
It’s nice but the stiffness is not appreciated 🙅
Atleast he’s not a blanket hogger and he’s quite considerate with the blankets and stuff
So
8/10
Leo Valdez
He sleeps two different ways
The first way is pretty compacted
What I mean is, he sleeps he sleeps bundled up by the blanket in a blanket burrito
The other one is where he sleeps sprawled out, limbs all over the place, blanket discarded
Just like Percy
So when he’s in a blanket burrito best believe he’s taking you with him
He usually does this during winter because he naturally runs hot
Anyway, he pulls you in and kinda bundled the blanket around you two for you guys to cuddle and be as close as possible
But when he’s sprawled out with his limbs everywhere he likes to cuddle with you on top of him
That or you’re abused and crushed by him in your sleep
Plus yknow how he runs hot? Well it’s absolute hell
It’s so hot and honestly suffocating when he’s sleeping on you 💀
Throw him on the ground pls
Ima rate him a 7/10 cuz he ain’t bad and if anything I love him so 🤷
Frank Zhang
He’s the best
Sorta…
He’s obviously huge so
He fully embraces you and hugs you so it’s pretty comfortable
And he sleeps on his side or stomach so there’s plenty of room
Even if he’s a bit stiff he’s still pretty nice to cuddle with
He’s pretty considerate on how you like to sleep/cuddle
He likes holding you so he’s not that picky
Honestly nothing to complain about with him
Except for one thing…
You can’t tell me this guy doesn’t fart 😐
I’m sorry but he just gives me those vibes
And it’s so bad
And not even on purpose either
It just happens but it’s the most traumatic thing ever
He feels pretty bad too 😭
Also when y’all are sleeping you just end up on different sides of the bed
He’s just casually on top of the blanket and you can’t even pull it from under him
You’re left shivering in the cold
Hazel Levesque
I love her 🫶
I see her sleeping on her sides and stomach tbh
She’s so sweet too
She loves to cuddle with you and even tho she doesn’t rlly have a firm grip she still likes to hold you
She especially likes to sleep on you
Either on your chest or just cuddled up to you
And she smells pretty sweet
Like clean laundry too like lawd
But ofc there’s gotta be some downsides
There’s isn’t really none with her, but with you
You end up stealing the blankets and hazel wakes up mad and cranky
That’s all and she quickly forgives you
Annabeth Chase
Sleeps on her back or side
She doesn’t really like cuddling all that much
She prefers to have some space and stuff when she sleeps
But if you want, she’s open to cuddling
She loves to both be held and to hold you
Mostly it’s mutual holding
Plus she probably sleeps with the fan on
Idk how to explain it
If you’re the type to always talk during night time then she’d react differently
Like if you gotta sleep asap cuz of the mission and all you do is yap
Then she’s turning her back on you and ignoring
What a meanie
At least she apologizes the next day but still
I don’t rlly see her stealing the blanket or anything but she is pretty stiff
Like besides hugging and stuff she lowkey just lets you hug her when she doesn’t feel like moving
Mood
Also since she smells good ofc ur gon sniff and she’ll be weirded out and ignore u this way too 😞
Piper McLean
She sleeps anyway tbh
She pretty cuddly and likes to snuggle w you
She usually likes to be held, but either way is fine
Especially after a fight or exhausting time with monsters
She’ll hold you in her arms too
She smells pretty nice and if you say so?
Well she finds it endearing
Unlike a certain someone
*cough cough* annabeth
But yea she’s the best
But she won’t hesitate to kick you out if you refuse to share the blanket
She gets enough crap from Leo
Who is just constantly annoying her
Calypso
The best
Like she fr loves to cuddle
With everything she’s been through best believe she’s the best cuddler
Honestly she sleeps whatever way
She’s another who loves to be held and to hold others
Especially if you’re hurt or anything
Then she’s try and tend to you
Even in sleep
Most times she’s a small spoon
She’s loved so many people who never loved her back
So perhaps she’s just a tad bit touch starved
And would obviously give in to any affection
As previously mentioned she loves to hold you too
Mostly just having you lean on her shoulder or lay on her lap but it also extends to cuddling on occasion
She’ll have you lay on her chest and in her arms and play with your hair
Ethan Nakamura
He’s so stiff it’s painful
(Not actually)
He’s definitely loyal, the books show that much
So despite his personal feelings with touch (he’s no doubt another touch starved person) he’d like to cuddle with you nonetheless
Not much in the beginning but he’d definitely warm up to you
And in the process, realize how much he wants it
He’ll let you love him however you want (cuddle him) and let you play with his hair
Which he loves
Eventually he gets enough courage to reciprocate
But he’s still stiff
Not the best when hugging or cuddling you because of how flustered he gets
Once you two go to bed and he falls asleep, he gets pretty subconsciously protective so he’ll hold you tight
Nico Di Angelo
Yes
Just yes
He loves to cuddle never made it obvious before tho
Another who was pretty stiff and touch starved
He gets over it quickly when he sees what you have to offer
I mean usually he just sleeps bundled up under the blankets, engulfed by their warmth
But with you there he just pulls you under the blankets with him so you can cuddle that way
Is mostly just mutual holding
He mostly just liked to intertwine your legs or hold onto you like a koala
I see him as a blanket stealer when you’re not glued together
He’s either super sleepy or not at all
When he’s tired he just drags you to bed, since that’s the only time nightmares don’t plague him
But when hes suffering from his insomnia he likes it when you stay up and talk with him
Idk to him it feels intimate but if you choose to go to bed, he won’t take it personally
If you play with his hair he won’t admit it but he loves it
Octavian
Ew.
Sorry I hate him but seeing that you’re here, you probs love him
So let’s get this over w
He’s rlly long and lanky and boney
Doesn’t stop yall from cuddling tho ig
And like a weirdo he sleeps on his back, arms to his side, head facing upward
Honestly probably obsessed with you
Only way he’d cuddle/ be in a relationship with you
He’s probably never been touched by another person
So he definitely likes to be held
Plus the bastard is selfish
And he doesn’t hold you
😐…
Yea so 1/10
I’m being generous
Reyna Ramirez-Arellano
I love her 😭🫶🫶
Yea she probs love you so ofc she’s gonna cuddle w u
Often times she’s busy with the duties of praetor so she can’t cuddle 😞
But it’s ok cuz when she can it’s the best
Not only is she holding you and making you feel cared after
But she also plays with your hair
Also you have to hold her
I don’t make the rules, just look at her, she needs it
When you do she’s a bit put off
But eventually she lets you coddle her
So more often than not she’s little spoon and comfortable
Just like she deserves
Yes beautiful
9/10
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Note: I just realized Reyna is a hunter now idk why I even wrote hers 😭 maybe pre-hunter Reyna??? Idk man
#fanfic#gn reader#male reader#female reader#fluff headcanons#percy jackson x reader#percy x reader#percy jackson fandom#percy pjo#percy jackson#percy jackon and the olympians#jason grace#jason grace x reader#leo valdez x female reader#leo valdez x male reader#leo valdez x reader#leo valdez fluff#leo valdez pjo#frank zhang#frank zhang x reader#hazel levesque#hazel levesque x reader#annabeth chase#annabeth chase x reader#octavian pjo#nico di angelo x reader#nico di angelo#reyna avila ramirez arellano#calypso#piper mclean x reader
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So I imagine a Reader and Bakugo are neighbours and their parents are friends so she’s known him since they were children but he dosent really care— anyways going to the future, reader confessed to Bakugo in middle school however since he dossnt get much attention from girls since they always ignore him he didnt know what to do and just reject her harshly, little did he know he started to develop feelings and it got worse when they both moved to UA💀. To make it worse reader made friends with Izuku lmao,,,
How do you think he would handle the crush thing and treat the reader before and after the war?
Before the war, he would definitely be super distant with Reader. Besides, Bakugo is the kind of guy who doesn't comprehend his feelings very well, so that leads him to suppress them until he explodes. Once he realizes he can't hold them anymore, he starts taking care of Reader in a super subtle way, like he makes sure she's good, she has eaten, that she doesn't strain herself too much on training, that she doesn't have any problem with tests and her assigments but if you think that if she has those problems he would approach her? You're wrong. If she's bad at training, he would send kirishima to train with her saying something very harsh like: "That loser can't fight for shit," and Kirishima would scold at him saying back: "that's not very cool, bro" and he would go and help you. He knows his people, so he knows how to play them.
After war, he realizes that everything can end in a second. After he dies and miraculously revives, he has a new vision of the world. He has a new vision of Deku, of his friends, of his family, and of course you. He needs to make amends.
Everyone is in delicate state after the war, physical injuries, and mental injuries. Every single person he knows is battleling with PTSD including you. After you heard him that he died and the tragic news spread almost as fast as the news of Todoroki taking down his own brother, you felt something breaking inside your chest. Your heart was ripped in two.
You knew that confessing your love to him wasn't very clever of you, and because of his response (or the lack of it), you thought that it'd be easier for you to forget him. You wished your feelings would be gone when you entered UA. But, just because the world hates you, they were still there, and even worse, they intensified.
So when you heard he had died and then revived, you decided to take a leap of faith and let your feelings be.
After the tumultuous end of the war, you haven't seen much of your classmates. Everyone was at home, including you, trying to heal wounds and getting a well-deserved rest.
You were admiring the ceiling of your room when a faint knock on your door snapped you out of your trance.
What you saw was like a mirage. Not even in your craziest dreams would you believe that this would ever happen to you.
"Are you busy or something?" He asks, taking a peak in between the door and the frame.
You are now sitting at the edge of the bed, shaking your head without talking.
"Then what are you waiting for? Come with me, " he huffs like it is the most obvious thing to do.
You two walked together to a nearby park where you used to play with Izuku when you were kids. He guided you to the swings, taking the one on the left, leading you to sit on the right.
The silence is heavy but no awkward.
"Are you feeling okay, now?" You ask, breaking the silence.
"Yeah," he says in a sigh.
You grab the chains of your swing and play with your feet until you reach some sort of rhythm that keep you swinging.
"I know you're wondering why I brought you here," he imitates you moving at the same tandem.
"I mean, we haven't been here since we were kids...is this some sort of reunion I'm not aware of? Is izuku coming too?" You ask with enthusiasm.
That was the thing with you, after you two kinda fell apart and took differents paths, you stayed with Izuku, you kept being his friend and that boiled Bakugo in a way that, in the past, he didn't understand. But now, everything was different. Now he understands that you needed Izuku and Izuku needed you.
"No. Just you and me, " he says. And he prays that in the near future it could stay like that.
"Oh," it is the only thing that comes out of your mouth.
Again, the silence.
In your skin, you could feel how he was fidgeting and turning every gear in his brain to say something, but Bakugo wasn't good at words.
"Okay, I'm gonna say it anyways," both his feet stop in the ground, doing a screeching sound that has you stopping your swinging too. "I was an asshole. I'm still an asshole I think, but I want to make this right. I apologized to Izuku, now you're next, so you're gonna listen to what I have to say. That day when you said those things to me and I made fun of you? I was wrong because since that day I can't get you out of my mind. I tried to, but I never could. Then everything was shit timing, and I didn't have the time to tell you this, but now, seeing what can happen I'm done fucking everything up. I'm sorry. I know I mistreated you, you didn't deserve that, and I'm sorry I did everything wrong"
The way he said that, like he was verbally puking on the ground, got you breathing like the air was limited. The first thought in your mind when he appeared at your bedroom door was that you were dreaming, and now you needed somebody to actually pinch you because you weren't understanding anything.
"Say something," he partly begs and grunts.
"What can I say? You appeared out of nothing, then dragged me here to say what I've been waiting to hear for like two years, and I've been picturing this in my mind for those years and in every scenario I know what I'm going to say but now I'm completely empty, nothing comes to my mind" you murmur more to yourself than him.
He was stoic. He didn't remember a time when he spoke that much to you, so he felt like it was the first time he had heard your voice in decades.
"In those scenarios, you cursed me?" He asks.
"Oh boy, I cursed you in languages that don't even exist." There's a mixture between a sigh and a laugh that erupts from inside of you, melancholy, you could tell, looking to the sky being the exact opposite of what you feel. Bright and blue, perfectly clear.
"Do you want to do it? I mean, I can take it without spatting back, " he shrugs nonchalantly. You raise both of your brows at him. "What? I can do that!"
"Sure," you say sarcastically. "So, that's it? You came here to say sorry? I accept your apologies"
You were being honest with him. There wasn't any bad blood between you two, and after what happened, you really wished that you two could get along again like old times.
Bakugo felt the same. He still had mixed feelings about you. Everything that happened made him realize how short life can be and how he shouldn't be wasting any more opportunities. He was about to verbalize that when he felt your hand on top of his.
"I hope we can be friends" you say.
Your smile is bright, and your eyes are sincere. And for the first time, he smiles at you, hoping and wondering that you could be more than just friends.
#mha x reader#bakugo x reader#my hero academia#bnha bakugou#bakugo headcanons#bakugo smut#bakugou smut#my hero academy fanfiction#katsuki bakugo x reader#mha bakugo katsuki#bnha bakugo katsuki#bakugo katsuki#bakugou katsuki x reader#katsuki bakugou#bakugou katsuki#mha bakugo x reader#mha bakugou#bakugou x reader
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mad about you | oneshot
pairing: choi beomgyu x you, delusions of kang taehyun x you
summary: beomgyu is not only a spoiled, rich asshole whose whole life has been served to him on a silver platter, but he's also your student council vice president. things finally come to a head on your final trip as college students, but not in the way you would expect. or, beomgyu catches you, the student council president, smoking weed and tries to blackmail you for it
genre: romance, angst (only a tiny bit...? shocking i know), fluff (kinda...? shocking i know), SMUT (MDNI!!!), sub!idol, beomgyu enemies to lovers
warnings: bad writing, not proofread at all, smut (MDNI!!!), sub!gyu LMAOOOO, marijuana, dirty talk, praise, handjobs, oral (m. receiving), unprotected sex, creampie, lmk if i missed anything!
word count: 7.1k
notes: please... this took MONTHS for me to write i fear i am the worst request taker on moablr. this was really difficult for me to complete but alas... it is done. if you hate it, my fault! just please don't bully me i've got enough shit going on in my life rn 💀 i hate it too but that's okay!
being a straight-a student is hard. being the student government president? even harder. being both? hell on earth. but now, in your senior year of college, you’ve finally managed to get it down to a science. things run relatively smoothly, which is due in no small part to the blood, sweat, and tears you’ve put in to make the student body happy, never mind the lengths you've gone to for the faculty. you can confidently say you can cope with nearly every trial and tribulation that comes your way with a smile on your face. well, except for one recurring disaster: beomgyu.
at first, he was nothing more to you than a pest buzzing around for no real purpose other than to mildly annoy you. it was strange because he seemed normal at first, but then he would pick on your looks, every time you made a mistake in class, and even how you happened to wear your hair that day. this was annoying and, well, hurtful. still, it was of no real consequence, so you were able to ignore him when that was the case, but now you know better than to underestimate just how disastrous beomgyu’s presence can be. as the student government vice president, he should be your first and most trusted ally, but he’s nothing short of, for lack of a better term, a major asshole deadset on making your life even more difficult than it already is for reasons unknown to you.
you think it may be because you would have probably beaten him for the actual president’s chair, which led him to run for vice president, instead. you don’t know why he minds this, though, because he couldn’t seem to care less about the council, not to mention school in general. it’s not that he gets bad grades, because he doesn’t. in fact, when he gets called on in class, he always gets the answer right even when he clearly wasn’t paying any attention. still, you work twice as hard as anyone else and yet your grades are only rivaled by his own. even taehyun, your (probably unrequited) crush, can’t help but be beaten by beomgyu as if the hand of god itself smacks down on everyone else every time you all take a test.
getting good grades should be an admirable thing, right? it helps with potential internships and jobs and all that, but the thing is: beomgyu doesn't need any of it. even if he fails all of his classes, he's set for life as the son of a formidable CEO of a company whose profits are more than you could ever dream of attaining. there is absolutely no doubt that beomgyu will succeed him, and there is even less doubt that he'll undeniably be very, very good at it. what’s worse is that even if he failed to meet expectations, he’d still get the position, anyway.
that, in comparison with your family’s laughable financial circumstances, would be enough to make you secretly hate the boy just on principle; but jealousy is ugly, no doubt, so you’ve kept your feelings to yourself. you would have fallen into a pit of self-loathing and guilt had beomgyu actually been kind, and you may have even grown to like him if that were the case, but no. beomgyu is not kind. he’s a total prick. you see it in his smug little smile when the test papers get handed back and he annihilates everyone — other than you — in class, especially taehyun. you see it in the smirks he sends you when you catch him making out with whoever his new girlfriend of the week happens to be, and in the way he openly mocks you by calling you a prude in front of the entire student population. and most importantly, you see it in the way he watches you struggle to stay afloat while he cruises on by without a care in the world.
-
honestly? beomgyu knows better than to bully the girl he has a crush on just because he wants her attention, but who told you to make it so damn hard on him? it’s not like he didn’t consider being nice at first, but your aloofness to his charms only caused him to believe that he was nearly invisible to you, and he simply wouldn't stand for that. naturally, the best course of action was to get you to hate him — at least that means you’re actually paying attention to him. that’s what he tells himself as he’s sticking one of his spindly legs out as you walk past him, effectively tripping you in the process and making the entire class erupt into laughter. your nostrils flare as your head whips up to meet his condescending gaze. once again, your eyes are completely on him. check and mate.
that's what it feels like, at least, until you’re hurriedly pulled up by a concerned taehyun and he’s frantically asking if you’re alright while fixing up your (now) fucked up hair. your eyes, which were just brimming with anger and contempt for him, are now overflowing with lovesickness and infatuation for the other boy. well, never mind about the whole “checkmate” thing, it’s like beomgyu doesn’t even exist in the same world as you anymore.
-
“you need to relax,” taehyun says, gently closing the notebook in front of you and sliding over a few of your favorite snacks.
“th-thank you, tyun,” you reply, shyly. he grins when he sees he’s succeeded in distracting you.
“no problem, we wouldn’t want that pretty little head of yours to break from thinking too much, now would we?” he teases. you feel heat rushing to your cheeks at his words. he doesn’t really mean them, he never does, but that doesn’t stop your heart from racing when he says things like this to you.
having a crush on taehyun is only natural. that’s what you tell yourself, but the way you have a shrine dedicated to notes he’s passed you and polaroids you’ve taken together sitting prettily in your room is most definitely unnatural. he doesn’t need to know about that, though.
“my head’s not going to break,” you huff with a playful roll of your eyes. “i just need to finish outlining the major stops on the trip and i’ll be done, i promise.”
it’s true that all you have to do is outline where you’re going to stop on the council’s senior trip, which doesn’t sound like a big deal in theory, but in actuality, you have to clear each stop with the faculty and make sure you stay within the budget in spite of beomgyu’s insufferable attempts to exceed it. he’s made light of the finances and talked up special events to the rest of the council members, even taehyun. you tried to snuff out these suggestions with realistic arguments about how expensive it will be, but his response was to call you a killjoy. simple and straightforward, but effective, nonetheless. everyone, even taehyun, was so excited to try everything he hyped up, so how could you say no when taehyun turned to you, all bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, and practically begged you to relent? you, unfortunately, didn’t and don’t have the heart to deny him, so you caved, and now you’re stuck trying to figure it all out.
“you promise?” taehyun asks, snapping you out of your spiral, with his cute cat-like fangs showing ever so slightly.
“i promise,” you nod and he cheers triumphantly. again, you can’t help but feel your cheeks warm, and you’d bask in the moment if your gaze didn’t happen to catch beomgyu’s scrutinizing one at this very moment. he looks at you like he’s watching a monkey putting on a show, and your happiness is instantly replaced with a sense of embarrassment. you’ve never told a single soul about your feelings for taehyun, but eerily enough, beomgyu seems to know something the rest of the world does not. he seems well aware of your deepest secret. why he doesn’t just expose you in order to humiliate you, you have no idea, but you do know you don't like how much he knows.
-
you really, really shouldn’t be doing this. and certainly not here, of all places, but you just can’t help it. smoking weed is terrible for you, and you of all people should know, seeing as how you led a presentation on its ill effects in front of the entire student body in your freshman year. but it’s hard to truly care when you’re wound so tightly you feel like you’re about to burst.
beomgyu is getting his way again, as always, and you’re worried about having to make yet another last minute change to your trip’s itinerary for tomorrow because he called today’s stop boring, which led to the rest of the council silently agreeing. so here you sit on the top of the hotel building as the rest of the group are out sightseeing, taking a long, lung-scorching drag from the blunt in between your fingers.
“didn’t take you for the smoking type, madame president,” a voice cuts in from out of nowhere. beomgyu. fuck.
you try to keep your cool, but you end up choking on the smoke as you hurriedly go to flick the blunt away, but beomgyu’s hand grabs your wrist before you can quite make it there. his touch feels like a brand searing itself into your skin, but you’re too overstimulated to notice.
“i didn’t tell you you had to stop,” he muses condescendingly as you rip your wrist away from his grasp. he winces. you don't catch it. instead, you can’t help but roll your eyes at the presumption that he has the power to tell you to do anything.
“i’m not one of your little minions,” you snap in spite of yourself. “quit acting like you can boss me around.”
“is that so?” he questions, not without an air of smugness. alarm bells blare in your ears as you try to sniff out where his confidence is coming from. sure, he caught you smoking, but it’s your word against his. that’s right, there’s no need to be scared. if he says anything at all, you can just feign innocence and say you were the one who caught him sneaking out to smoke.
“yep,” you answer with a grin at your new plan, popping the “p” with the same obnoxiousness he usually terrorizes you with. you’re no match for him in terms of popularity, but you will never lose to him when it comes to credibility.
“you’re not afraid that i’ll snitch on you? you’re not scared of me telling everyone how little-miss-perfect spends her alone time?”
“you can try,” you reply with a shrug. he’s silent for a few moments, as if he’s in deep thought.
“you know what? you’re right,” he concedes with a sigh, and shockingly so. the beomgyu you know and loathe would never give up that easily. “you don’t have to listen to what i say. nobody would believe me over you, right?”
you eye him suspiciously before giving a slight nod.
“and most times, you would be absolutely right. like, just imagine if i told them you faked being sick and flaking on everyone else just so you could get high. nobody would believe me. i wouldn’t even believe me,” he continues. you have no idea why he’s going on and on about this, but you don’t like it.
“what the hell are you playing at?” you ask through clenched teeth.
“i mean, i’m just saying that nobody would believe me. not unless i showed them something like, i don’t know, this?” he says with a grin, holding up his phone and showing you an alarmingly high resolution photo of you taking a hit of your blunt. your eyes widen in sheer horror and you immediately jump to try to retrieve his phone from his hands, but beomgyu is quicker. he tauntingly holds it up in the air with one arm and stops you from coming any closer with the other. you try to jump to reach it, but you’re no match for his stature and long limbs. damn him for being so fucking tall.
“delete it!” you shriek, but all he does is click his tongue and shake his head like the insufferable asshole he is.
“oh, sure,” he says nonchalantly. your eyes widen even further as he lowers his phone and fiddles with the screen, still keeping you at arm’s length so you’re helpless to grab it for yourself.
“r-really?” you ask incredulously, sincerely taken aback by his compliance. stupid, stupid you. he tuts in response.
“you don’t really think i’ll make it that easy, do you?”
“fine,” you relent, jaw tense and eyebrows furrowed in an almost comically exaggerated way. “what the hell do you want from me?”
“nothing much, just lemme smoke with you,” he answers with a lopsided grin, showcasing a dimple in his cheek you had never noticed until now.
“w-what?” you ask dazedly.
“god, you’re slow,” he tells you with a roll of his eyes. “smoke with me and i’ll delete the picture. i won’t even mention it again.”
“are you being serious?” you whisper.
“dead serious,” he smirks.
“... fine,” you find yourself relenting, yet again. you don’t know if you necessarily trust him to actually follow through with his words, but what choice do you have? why he wants to smoke with you, you have no idea, but if it gets him to keep his mouth shut, then you really can’t ask for much more than that.
you sigh and take a seat, walking over near the entrance of the rooftop and propping yourself up against the concrete wall behind you. surprisingly, he stays planted in the same spot as if he didn’t hear you. you pat the ground next to you impatiently in light of his hesitation. he snaps out of his daze as he sits next to you so tentatively it’s like you’re a stray cat he’s afraid to scare off. well, good. it’s best for him not to get too comfortable around you. you hate the guy, after all.
you take another deep inhale and he watches you with a gaze that can only be described as lovesick, but you’re too preoccupied to pick up on it. when you exhale, you find yourself starting to pass the blunt over to beomgyu before thinking better of it.
“wait,” you say, pulling your hand back before he can grip the blunt.
“what?” he asks, genuinely confused.
“am i gonna catch something from you if we share this?”
“oh, fuck you,” he grunts, effectively snatching the blunt back and putting it to his lips.
“it’s a real question! i’ve seen the girls you mess around with, and i’m not trying to catch anything from you!”
“i’m careful,” he argues with a roll of his eyes. “a lot more careful than you think.” you pout at his reaction, but for some reason, you believe his words.
“if i catch anything, it's on you,” you reply, hackles still raised. shockingly, he doesn't press the matter any more than that.
“... so,” he says after exhaling a deep drag.
“so what?” you ask.
“so why are you out here smoking instead of going out with everyone else?”
“do you seriously think you have the right to ask me that?” you scoff. there’s no way in hell beomgyu is trying to get you to be vulnerable right now.
on beomgyu’s end, he can’t help but feel slighted, even though your reaction is definitely his fault on account of how he essentially antagonizes you at every given opportunity.
“i’m just saying that it’s weird how you’re here instead of, you know, actually enjoying the trip.”
“oh, please. as if there was gonna be any possible way for me to have fun on this fucking thing,” you bitterly reply.
“what’s that supposed to mean?” he asks without any malice, but with genuine curiosity.
truly, honestly, sincerely, you do not know why you say your next words. maybe it’s because you’re high, or maybe it’s because you need to tell someone — anyone — how you really feel, for once. all you really know is: you can’t stop yourself.
“i mean, how could i possibly enjoy myself when i’m left to figure everything out on my own? everyone only cares about having fun with no actual idea how we’ll do it while realistically staying within the budget and our timeline, and my vice president is deadweight, so it’s not like he’ll help,” you complain, taking a jab at beomgyu in light of your waning self control. you’re prepared to verbally spar with him after that last comment, but he surprises you.
“is that how you really feel?” he asks.
“yeah, it is,” you tell him. “that’s how i always feel,” you can’t help but add, more to yourself and less to him, but he hears you, anyway.
“i’m sorry.” you whip your head around to make sure you’re not having some sort of auditory hallucination. did beomgyu just apologize to you? it can’t be. there’s no earthly way.
“i’m sorry. i really am,” he repeats. your whole world feels like it’s thrown off of its axis when you see how somber and genuinely apologetic he looks.
“it’s… it’s fine,” is all you can really muster up the words to say.
“no, it’s not. i’ll help you as much as i can, i swear,” he earnestly insists. you nod in bewilderment at his earnestness — feeling too awkward to do much else.
things are quiet for the next few minutes while you two are passing the blunt back and forth. beomgyu can feel the high finally hitting him in full force, and it takes every brain cell within his clouded mind (as well as every ounce of his courage) to finally get out his next sentence.
“why him?” he mumbles so lowly, you don’t quite catch his words.
“what?” you lazily ask.
“why taehyun?” once again, you find yourself choking on the smoke. god, you’ve really got to get a grip and stop letting beomgyu surprise you — your lungs would thank you for it.
“w-what do you mean?” well, you always knew that beomgyu knows about your feelings for taehyun, but hearing him directly ask about them is enough to throw you off.
“i mean, why do you like him?” he asks, devoid of all the confidence he usually oozes.
“what’s not to like?” you say offhandedly. if you cared enough to pay attention to his reaction, you’d see how he withers at your words. even more so when you continue.
“he’s really, really funny. plus, he’s handsome. not to mention smart and —”
“so what? i’m all of those things,” beomgyu interrupts, irritation bitterly lacing every edge of his words. “and if you call him smart, anybody can be.” oh hell no. you’re so indignant at him calling taehyun stupid, you don’t even catch beomgyu’s childlike envy towards him, let alone why he feels it.
“just because his grades don’t compare to yours, doesn’t mean he’s stupid,” you argue.
“then what does it mean?” he asks with a roll of his eyes at your obvious bias for the other boy.
“it… it just means that he’s —”
“a real genius. yeah, i’m sure you think so,” he snarks.
“what the hell is that supposed to mean?!” you snap, despite your better judgment to just let it roll off of your back. if he were talking about you, you may very well have done so, but this is taehyun he’s talking about. your taehyun.
“it means he can’t compare to me,” he says, more as means to convince himself rather than convince you, but you’re so angry, you don’t even notice.
“and what makes you think you’re so goddamn special?” you ask, sarcasm absolutely dripping out of your voice.
“i’m funnier, hotter, smarter, richer. how can he compare to me?” he snorts. if someone were to ask you why you feel so defensive at this moment, you would be unable to say why, but if you had to guess, you’d say it’s because taehyun is so good it’s impossible to see him any other way. your frustration builds up, hotter and hotter in your chest until you’re on the brink of exploding.
“you say that, but he will always be something you’re not,” you spit.
“and what, pray tell, might that be?” he cockily challenges.
“nice,” you say with conviction, and it may be cheesy, but you mean it. “he is really, really fucking nice and considerate. that’s why i like him.” well, that one went straight to his gut.
“i can be nice!” he exclaims. “i tried to be nice, but you just didn’t care! it was like i was invisible to you!” all you can do is stare, but he’s not finished. “you act like you’re some fucking angel, but i saw the way you looked at me like i’m some stupid, rich asshole who isn’t worth a damn.”
finally, you realize that something is wrong.
“beomgyu, why do you even care about what i think about you?” he doesn’t give a fuck about what you have to say in any other context, today’s example being only the latest in the litany of times where he’s shown you that exact sentiment.
at this, he’s silent, which you truly did not anticipate in lieu of his tirade mere moments ago. you take a good look at the boy, and you finally register that the tips of his ears are a bright red under the fluorescence of the lone light shining next to the doorway.
“i just… i always care about what you think,” he mumbles, face growing redder and redder under your scrutinizing stare as he breaks eye contact with you.
“you could’ve fooled me,” you snort. “you’re always undermining everything i say and do. it’s almost like you’re doing it on… purpose…” you trail off, puzzle pieces finally fitting together in a way you would never suspect.
“beomgyu?” you ask.
“mm?” he murmurs, still refusing to make eye contact.
“do you… do you like me?” and the question sounds so silly you can’t believe you even asked it. this guy fucking hates you, you’re sure of it, but you grow less and less sure of this sentiment with every moment he hesitates to answer.
“... yeah. yeah, i do. but so what? you don’t even care,” he mopes, and just like that, everything makes sense. his teasing, his contrarian nature, and his obnoxiousness are just part of his ruse. he’s just like a child begging for attention by acting out, but to what end? just so you’ll pay attention to him? well, he was on the money when he said you didn’t like him even when he tried to be kind, so maybe, in his own sick little way, he was right.
but that doesn’t mean you don't feel completely blindsided by this revelation.
“what the hell?” is all you can manage to say.
“shut up!” he demands with no real heat to it, just embarrassment.
“i… i can’t believe your solution was to be an asshole,” you say incredulously. “if you had just been nice, or even just normal, i would have warmed up to you. i know i was being childish, but goddamn, you’re worse.”
if he was blushing before, and he was, he’s absolutely blood red now.
“i-it’s your fault for being so judgmental!” he sputters, but even you know he’s just grasping at straws. it all makes the worst kind of sense to you now, and you’re very much shocked at how oblivious you were mere moments ago.
“i can't believe this,” you whisper, bringing your hands up to your temples in an effort to straighten everything out in your muddled head. “you hate me.”
“you’re so dramatic,” he huffs with a roll of his eyes, which would convincingly come across as disdainful, if only his words weren’t so shaky and unsure.
you take a good look at him now, and he can feel it. he’s a very handsome guy, and he knows it, but he can’t help but feel vulnerable. he clears his throat and straightens up his posture when he thinks that you may be comparing him to taehyun... you are not.
none of his actions escape you, which is a far cry from what usually happens, but now that you've discovered his true feelings, it’s almost impossible not to catch his tells; you even wonder how you missed them. his awkward handling of the situation is endearing, in a way. you like watching him squirm, which you realize must be the way he felt about you all those times he teased you. it just makes you wanna push him more.
you’re not exactly known for your impulsivity. in fact, you’re known for the exact opposite. you take things slowly, steadily. you plan every minute detail in consideration of every possible outcome, but as for right now? right now, as you sit and watch beomgyu pout, you just want to let go and do what you really want, and what you really want is to watch him break.
you grab his face with your hands and turn it towards you, and he scowls for just a moment before blinking his big, reddened eyes in curiosity at your unreadable gaze.
“w-what are you doing?” he asks, too exhilarated by your touch to think about batting you away.
this is a bad idea — a horrible one, even — but that does nothing to deter you. how can it when his skin on your palms makes it feel like there's pure electricity thrumming through your bones? fuck it, might as well.
you don’t realize it yourself, but you look incredibly focused as you pull him in, his lips meeting yours. you’d think with the shock he must feel that he’d be taken aback for a second, but beomgyu, as always, does not abide by your rules. he immediately grabs your face and presses his lips even harder against yours. you’re surprised at how much heat is behind it — how much frustration.
it’s incredibly interesting to watch his reactions as you kiss him, which would be weird, but he’s far too engrossed in this newfound pleasure to notice your stare. his eyes are shut, but they tremble with every passing second, making his long eyelashes quiver. you never noticed how long they are before now. you chalk up the swiping of your tongue against his chapped lips to sheerly wanting to study his reaction, and oh man, it does not disappoint. he whines against your mouth, eyebrows furrowed like he’s pleading for something. you want to find out what that something is. cruelly, you take his bottom lip between your teeth and lightly bite. he whines even louder, his eyes fluttering open, and he pulls away and says his next words in a tinny voice.
“c-can i touch you?” he pants, forehead pressed against yours, lips cherry red.
“no,” you say with a smile against his mouth. he would whine again if he could, but he can’t quite do it at the moment, not when your hands have moved from his cheeks in order to explore the rest of him. you curiously run your fingers through his long, silky hair, and he can’t help but moan when you experimentally tug at it. it’s breathy and light, and you’re intrigued, to say the very least.
you don’t have the most experience in the world when it comes to the, uh, matters between men and women, but you are a fast learner by nature, so it takes no time at all to figure out where he likes to be touched. his lips, obviously, and his hair. his ears, so flushed and pink and cute, must be particularly sensitive, and you test this hypothesis by dragging your teeth along his earlobe. he lets out a loud, broken moan when you do, and anyone else in the world would have been embarrassed by making such a noise, but not beomgyu. he’s so pretty and pliable underneath your touch, which feels so tantalizing that all shame escapes him.
“do you like that, beomie?” you whisper teasingly, employing a nickname you’ve heard from a few of his ex-flings, and another strangled cry leaves his pouty lips when he feels your breath touch his ear.
“mhmm, i like it! like it so much, princess,” he babbles, eyes screwed shut as you trail your lips from his ear to his unblemished neck.
“princess?” you can’t help but question. “where’d that come from?”
“think about calling you that all the time,” he moans as you suck on a previously unmarred patch of skin on his neck. “think about you all the time.”
“and what do you think, beomie?” you whisper encouragingly, as if he’s a stupid boy squirming under your thumb.
“th-think about how much i wanna fuck you,” he admits. “h-how much i want to fill you up, make you m-mine.” honest to god, your panties were already feeling a little sticky just from teasing him alone, but his words make your core heat up tenfold. you shift your legs while trying to make yourself more comfortable, but you fail miserably.
“you’re delusional,” you snort, as you pull away from him, but his lips try to chase yours before you lightly push him away.
“i’m not! i-i jus’ wanna make you feel good,” he slurs, and oh god, you simply can’t be saved.
“well, wanna make your delusions reality?” you can’t help but ask before you can think better of it, but when you see how his eyes light up in hope and pure, primal lust, you realize you don’t regret it.
-
the walk to his hotel room is silent, so unbearably silent that you can’t help but second-guess yourself. are you really gonna do this with beomgyu of all people? but it’s been so long since you’ve let go, who will it hurt just to have fun for once? maybe you, probably you, but who cares? it can't be any worse than it is now. besides, you're graduating soon. if things go as badly as you’re pretty sure they will, you’ll never have to see beomgyu again after the fact. plus, things really can’t seem to get any more embarrassing than the humiliation ritual you put yourself through every day that you spend pining after taehyun.
and so, you enter his hotel room, which is easily double the size of yours (sans a roommate, no less) with a look of determination. beomgyu completely misses it, though, as he shuts the door behind you and immediately tugs you towards his bed, quick to rekindle the atmosphere you two had on the rooftop. surprisingly, it’s not hard to do so when he’s back to kissing you so desperately it’s like you’re his lifeline.
he impatiently swipes his tongue across your lips, mirroring what you did earlier, silently asking for entry. you oblige. he groans at the feeling of your warm tongue brushing against his own, savoring the way you taste, which yes, does have notes of weed, but there’s something sweet in there, too. something he’s only ever fantasized about with his hand down his pants.
one of your hands is currently tangled in his hair, just the way he likes it, while the other one exploratorily finds its way down his lithe body. you’ve never done what you do next before, but he seems so incredibly sensitive, it feels like a matter of course to put your hand up his shirt and tweak one of his hardened nipples. he lets out a strangled cry, which only makes you certain that you’ve done the right thing.
“is it good, beomie? is it everything you wanted it to be?” you tease. he nods like an idiot.
“y-yes, even better,” he moans. “feels s-so good.”
in the dim lighting of his hotel room, you can see that he means it as the tent in his pants gets harder and harder to ignore. the poor thing is so wound up by your caresses that he may just cum untouched, anyway, but what fun would that be? so, before you can think too much about it, you palm him through his jeans.
“ah!” he cries, eyebrows furrowed. you palm him again, rougher this time, and just like clockwork, he cries even louder.
“want me to keep going?” you ask, studying and soaking up every reaction of his. all he can do is nod.
he unzips his pants and he’s all too willing to help you slide them off of him, tossing them on the floor before hurriedly grabbing one of your hands to meet his barely clothed bulge. it’s big, because it’s beomgyu and of fucking course it is. as if he needed another reason to be conceited.
it doesn’t seem like he’s very conceited, though, as he moans like a whore at you hooking your fingers under his waistband and tugging his boxers off of him. his cock is very obviously leaking, and it’s as bright red as his ears were earlier, completely flushed with beads of precum drooling off of it. there are angry veins running up the sides of it, which sounds gross, in theory, but you can’t help but feel like they make it even prettier. you gulp when you imagine how they’ll feel when they’re dragging in and out of your pussy.
“don’t stare!” he says, breaking you out of your reverie. honestly? he knows it’s pretty, just like every other part of him, but he feels incredibly scrutinized under your gaze. you don’t listen, still very much staring as you take your thumb and experimentally swipe it over his thick, reddened tip. then again. then again.
“s-stop teasing me, please,” he whimpers, but you’re so enamored with his reactions you can’t help yourself. you spit on your hand and grab the base of his cock, which is no small feat considering how thick it is, and you give it a harsh tug. he bites his bottom lip to try to stifle his moans as you start to jerk him off, applying pressure exactly where he needs it most, but he quickly gives up on being quiet when you bend over and lick his tip. he tastes salty, but not unbearably so, and in a way, he’s almost sweet. that could just be your imagination, though.
beomgyu is no longer trying to bite back his moans, but he's stuck in another dilemma: he can't seem to unscrew his eyes for long enough to fully appreciate the sight before him. one of your hands is gripping the muscle of his thigh as leverage while the other aids in squeezing and pulling the parts of him you can’t quite fit in your mouth. you’re not looking at him, which would normally be disappointing, but it’s impossible to be anything less than satisfied when you’re hollowing out your cheeks to suck on him even harder. you take your hand from his dick and ghost your fingers over his balls, and he has to push you off of him so he doesn’t blow his load right then and there.
“what’s wrong?” you ask, wiping some spit and precum off of your lips. he’s enchanted by the way your lips are swollen from sucking on him, so much so that he almost forgets to answer.
“‘m gonna c-cum,” he says shyly.
“and?”
“i don’t want to yet. i wanna make you feel good, too,” he argues petulantly.
“oh? is that what you do in your dreams? you make me feel good? i’m surprised, i figured you’d like me to do all the work and —”
“shut up!” he hisses, and you can’t help but laugh.
“let me eat you out,” he offers, trying to distract you from his evident embarrassment. it’s tempting, very tempting, indeed, but you’re so hot and bothered that you kind of just want to get to the main event. especially since you just know it’ll feel good to finally have him inside of you. it’s been so long since you’ve been with somebody, after all.
“no, thanks. do you have a condom?” you ask, ignoring his suggestion, and he’d be humiliated if only your question weren't so damn exciting.
“n-no…” he stammers. your face falls for a second before he rushes to get out his next words. “b-but i can pull out!”
“sorry, this was fun and all, but i’m not letting you fuck me without protection.”
“please?” he begs. “i’m clean, i swear! i told you i’m more careful than you think. i really don’t sleep around that much, honestly,” he admits.
“what?” you ask, genuinely bewildered before calling his bluff. “bullshit. i see you with a new girl all the fucking time. quit lying.”
“i’m not! i promise — i promise — i don’t sleep around a lot. i only act like i do ‘cause of you!”
“because of me?” and it actually makes sense when you think about it. he acts out, bullies you, and pretends he’s involved with a lot more girls than he actually is just to try to get you to look his way. oh man, what are you gonna do with him?
“you’re so pathetic,” you sneer before hiking up your skirt and mounting him.
“w-what are you —”
“shut up before i change my mind,” you spit. and just like magic, his mouth is snapped shut.
you start by rubbing your clothed pussy against his bare cock. your slick has already ruined the fabric beyond salvation, so you don’t really mind ruining it some more. beomgyu is absolutely in awe at your actions, rutting against you feverishly. he’s greedy, if nothing else, so he impatiently moves your soaked panties to the side and tries to seek relief in your warm hole. you let him grab your hips as he tries to ease himself into you, but he’s stunned at the resistance he’s met with as he tries to push himself in.
“s-so tight,” he groans as his fat cock breaches the tight rim of your pussy. the muscles contract as they stretch to accommodate his widened tip.
you were right about how good you anticipated the feeling of his veins scraping against your insides would be, and you revel in the feeling as you sink down inch by scorching inch. beomgyu, on his end, looks absolutely devastated as you slowly take him in. his mouth is twisted open in a silent scream, and his eyes are watery, tears threatening to spill over at any moment. when your ass finally meets his hips, you can feel his length pulsating all the way up to your cervix. it’s a snug fit, too, and it takes everything in him not to hump you like a fucking dog.
slowly, you raise yourself up again, almost completely off of him, before slamming yourself back down. then again. then again. he whimpers when you do it, grabbing your hips to help steady you as you ride him for everything that he’s worth. he’s enraptured as your breasts bounce with each movement, and he can’t help himself now — he begins to thrust into you wildly, matching your rhythm and making you cry out. if you were in your right state of mind, you’d feel sorry for the poor souls who are on the same floor as him.
“pussy so f-fucking good,” he grunts as he feels you squeezing around him, and you’re about to smirk before he pushes you onto the bed then turns you on your side so you’re facing away from him. he tries to slide back into your needy cunt, but the new position makes you feel even tighter. still, with the combination of his slick and yours, he’s able to push himself in again before rutting into you. he presses one of his big hands against your stomach while the other one hastily grabs one of your tits, and suddenly he's back to fucking you like a wild animal.
you've never in your life felt so wanted, so needed, but beomgyu needs you in a way so carnal it makes you feel even more turned on. he nips your ear, mimicking your actions from earlier, and begs for your praise.
“a-are you feeling good? you’re feeling good, right?” he chokes out as he hits a particularly deep part of your pussy.
“so good, beomie,” you moan. “you’re fucking me so good.” those words would normally never leave your lips, but he seems desperate for your validation, and you know he’s too far gone to mock you.
“oh god, this is w-what i dreamed about,” he babbles as he takes the hand that was pressing on your stomach and uses it to massage your clit, earning a strangled scream from you. “th-this is what i’ve always wanted.” and if you could see his face, you’d notice how his eyes roll backwards in sheer ecstasy.
“i’m gonna cum!” you cry, all self-restraint gone.
“m-me too, princess,” he moans. “c-can i cum inside?” it’s a pipe dream if he’s ever had one, and you can believe that he’s had one, but your response floors him.
“yes, yes, yes! do it inside, i want it!” and that’s enough. he spits out a curse as he hammers himself into you, making you almost sob as you come undone with him inside of you. the feeling of your pussy sucking him in even more as it wildly contracts around him pulls him over the edge, so he paints your walls with his seed and fucks you through both of your highs.
he stays there until he goes soft, slowly pulling out and watching in awe as the cum spills out of your hole. he pulls you flush against his body and sighs as he tenderly fixes up your hair.
“i really, really like you,” he earnestly whispers into your hair.
“i —”
“it’s okay if you don’t like me yet,” he interrupts. “i can wait.” you’re glad you’re not facing him, because you actually feel a little awkward at his sincere words, but you can’t deny that it makes your heart flutter to hear them.
“okay,” you say.
“okay?” he asks, just to be sure he heard you correctly.
“yes, i-it’s okay. you can wait.” he’s so excited that he throws himself on top of you and turns you to face him, lips greedily meeting yours, putting every ounce of yearning into the kiss.
honestly? with the way things are going right now, he probably won’t have to wait very long at all.
notes pt. 2: yeah... i'm so sorry that this is bad i'm just used to writing angst angst angst and this def veered more into cute territory but whatever just don't bully me
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