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#it gets in the way of quite literally everything else in my life
girlscience · 8 months
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i genuinely think fanfic might be ruining my life
#when i say all i do all day is read fic it's not a joke and i'm starting to think it is actually bad for me#it gets in the way of quite literally everything else in my life#it is what i use to deal with any emotion outside of generally happy or vague nothingness#i read it first thing when i wake up i read until the last second i have to get out of bed#i read all day at work and then read all night until my eyes hurt and i have to go to sleep#it makes up 90% of what i think about every single day#it is a huge chunk of what i talk about with other people cause it's all my thoughts#i can't make myself stop reading it#like i actually start going through withdraw or something#it gets hard to think and i can't focus and i can't sit still and i feel so so bored#and it feels like nothing else matters#i used to read science magazines for fun and now i can't even get through one article without feeling like i'm dying#there is some crazy good fic out there but most of what i read is like... the tik tok of stories#it's like the short form version of a book#it is taking over my life (i say that like this hasn't been true for probably a decade at this point)#but i literally don't know how to fix it#i can delete my ao3 but you can read without an account#i guess i could go wholesale and delete the internet off my phone#but i need that for so many other things#i straight up don't know what to do#i might actually need help. like i think i might be addicted the way some people are to social media
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shannonsketches · 4 months
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like why did they change where Vegeta was when Cell announced the cell games in the anime
why did they make this vegeta starting shit with yamcha instead of chillin in the lab with his family? why did they take Bulma out of the lab? Why'd they say she was Out while Dr Brief was repairing 16? Why did they change Bulma working on advanced robotics to running in late with her baby?
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it's the same scene except: - Bulma's actively at work being a scientist - Vegeta's not being rude to her (or anyone else!) - Vegeta waits for Trunks instead of leaving the room - Cell interrupted the airwaves, which means Trunks and Vegeta were just hanging out with Bulma and Dr B while they were working
Those are all Great Character Details!! That the anime rails against!!
#these cowards afraid of showing Vegeta actively choosing to be around his wife and child even when he's Bad#Because Goku who is Good never ever even once makes that choice onscreen outside of filler#and then they justify that choice by making Chi-Chi seem horrid and unreasonable for (checks notes) Not Wanting Her Child to Die#anyway I am once again being bitter about anime vs manga klasjdklasd#I can't believe I let the anime convince me I hated Goku man Goku's SUCH a good and ridiculous character in the manga#the anime just SUCKS at letting him be who he's always been#and has to reframe and recontextualize and reword everything he does so that it seems like he's Actually Quite Mature and Thoughtful nO#THAT's VEGETA YOU COWARDS#also the fact that bulma said she wouldn't live with him at the beginning of this arc to him casually hanging out with her and trunks#after cell beat his ass and humbled him is REALLY GOOD SUBTEXT for their shared relationship having improved without showing it#it's great subtext for all three of them and toei just went 'nah' and decided to make it a whole group shot so ...? Master Roshi could sit#and explain how ??? Tournaments Work??? Just so Cell could log on and also explain how tournaments work?? God it's been so long#since I've watched the anime and now when I do it just makes me mad aklsdjskja the manga is SOOOOO much better#there are some spots where the pacing is more ideal in the anime like goku turning ssj for the first time but like man. everything else is.#like why are you making Goku snarky with Vegeta dude his clapbacks are SO much funnier when they're just Tactless Honesty#like Vegeta's not insulted by Snark bitch he grew up in the Freeza force that man was raised by THE bitchiest drag queens#Vegeta's insulted by someone saying something deeply and insultingly True to his face as if it's the fucking weather#Goku in the anime is like 'a battle of wits hoho' but Goku's purity is part of the joke he's not snippy he's just got no social etiquette#He's just honest! He's not trying to be insulting. That's what MAKES it insulting! That's the WHOLE GAG of why Vegeta can't stand him#Goku is always just telling the truth and it's always the rudest shit Vegeta's ever heard in his life#'it's a sunny day! i'm way stronger than you! see you out there bud!' 10000% Genuinely Friendly. Golden Retriever-Ass Pure.#Infuriating. Hilarious.#anyway I looked at anime clips to make sure I remembered things right and that was a mistake#as someone who has a soft spot for it and grew up on it -- compared to the manga it's bad and it's always been bad#and toriyama was right to be disinterested in watching it jesus christ they BUTCHERED his work#anyway this has been another shot of haterade with sketches thank you for scrolling my rambletags askljdask#dbtag#i just truly can't get over how they make Vegeta call her 'woman' in the anime and he literally only ever calls her Bulma in the manga#except for on namek when he refers to her as 'the/that woman' because she is a complete stranger#why is he calling her woman like he's a 1940s american husband and not an extraterrestrial from a deeply advanced society toei
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talkorsomething · 3 months
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I have Got to get more transgender
#100% секретный дневник левы НЕ ЧИТАЙ#transmasc#trans ftm#transgender#i like 2 say i'm very trans already but unforch i am Not Really. mostly boring ftm Guy Ever#so tempted to cut my hair again but my sense of what i look like is already so fuzzy i dont think it'd help..#want to dye my hair anyways. at this point i'd take whatever color i can get if not purple LOL#it's almost everything i could want and yet ... still me. still the same life. stuck.#soooo high functioning like you wouldnt believe EXCEPT istg i need an emotional support human who will guide me through tasks#such as 'pay with your Moneys Card at the Store'#or... idk that's it really. maybe go grocery shopping without feeling like i'm not meant to be there also#or like. exist in general maybe#reasons why not emotional support Animal: creature cannot understand capitalism. and also is not as necessary as a service dog specifically#idk! every time i come on here i fall apart (in text) and then pull myself back together for another day of ... this i guess.#i'm not even having like crying breakdowns or anything to go along with it i'm just held inside this shell of a body. typing away again#i'm soso tempted to make things worse. progress wouldn't matter anymore... at least maybe it would feel real that i'm like this#i wish my face fit on my body right. and also that i did not look quite so much like a vaguely gnc lesbian#like at LEAST let me look butch as hell but no. curse of sad hair & uncertainty#miss my little mullety thing from that brief period in october... miss my short hair from back in 2017 ...#just dont feel satisfied with what i am now. in general.#top surgery is literally Within my reach but i'm not sure about cost and i need to wait because of doing guard now......#my list of do i want t i kept for the past month turned out to be a bunch of maybes#partially cause i got sick. partially cause it stopped being shark week and i forgot about it#as always happens...#still unsure in my new(er) name. only heard it once#didn't feel the same way as with my old one? but idk. just don't know.#missing guard also but feeling conflicted about not having time for other hobbies...#since winter season is over i've had so much time to play guitar! that's insane! mostly cause i stopped playing for unrelated reasons...#just tired again. wonder if i need more sleep than what i always get. kind of restless.#there's nothing else to say i guess. just wish i could be a person the way everyone else seems to be.
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raayllum · 5 months
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the genre of canon divergence where it sounds interesting but then it bashes the canon it's 'fixing' in the comments when you actually liked how canon went, too 😔
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dirt-str1der · 1 year
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Love characterising nishikiyama as a booze hound drug hound meth addict high every day body mass 75% alcohol hands constantly shaking literally spacing out while driving fifty over the speed limit using elderly folk as speedbumps one hand on the wheel and one hand free to do more drugs and coming into work while functionally deaf and blind and he is still leagues more competent at his job than kiryu
#Yakuza loveblog#i dont talk about nishikiyama enough because im kazamapilled and hate him a little bit but im also kiryupilled and love him so much so you#see my problem? like i adore when nishiki is just. better in every way than kiryu and nobody ever sees that because theyre all too busy#sucking kiryus cock like okay nishiki had the rest of his life planned out when he was twenty and he was an extremely successful criminal#and getting himself noticed in many many circles then kiryu steps outside and gets into a street fight immediately and the entire tojo clan#surrounds him to throw cash at him like nishiki was actually doing so well for himself before his life was ruined. nothing is his fault#like i love just accepting that nishiki has one hell of a substance abuse problem and nobody cares enough about him to talk to him about it#and kiryu thinks its normal because hes the only one who can see that nishikis doing some great work out there so he must be doing#everything right. inconceivable that nishiki has any sort of ‘problem’ hes the real screwup and kiryu knows he makes life harder for himself#but he refuses to change because hes convinced that thats the only thing hes good at. like i believe that nishiki has a coke snorting#mechanic in game like harry db and without his coke buff he cant do as much damage like with it his output is on par with kiryus whos just#been blessed since birth by the violence gods. anyway kiryu is the only person in the world who thinks that nishiki is great do you get it#nishiki has lived his entire life in kiryus shadow and he doesnt care that kiryu has a natural charisma that he will never have. he has to#get out there every single day networking and socialising and hustling and nonstop landing interviews with cool magazines to get his name#out in the world while kazama takes kiryu out and drags him by the elbow to meet people like this is my son kiryu who has every disease and#everyone claps and cheers like i cannot stress enough how on top of the game nishiki is compared to kiryu. he has a car. kiryu doesnt even#have his own lighter. they are not on the same playing field and yet nishikis always trailing behind him because opportunity is always#knocking at kiryus doorstep whether he likes it or not and nishiki gets fed scraps and nothing else and hes the one with ambition he wants#the view on top and most importantly he wanted his brother there with him but nobody ... likes him ... nobody likes nishiki nobodys in his#corner he onky had kiryu and when he lost him it was quite literally him against the world. it always made me laugh how at the end of yk1#harukas paying her respects at nishikis grave when the only time he ever cared about her was because he wanted her little pendant and he#(actually fucked how alone nishiki was he didnt even have his own fucking men to rely on he was basically working alone with someone he knew#was using him like ??? he was fucking desperate) anyway i really love to think that kiryu being nishikis only friend and the last person in#the world who thought kindly of him (barring like ... kashiwagi) was grieving terribly over his death and haruka being a sensitive and#sweet little girl took the initiative to ask about nishiki and i think kiryu would tell her stories every night of the kind of stuff he and#nishikiyama would get up to when they were her age. he would tell her how amazing nishiki was and how he always looked out for him how he#took care of his sister and how he would always be the one to remind them of impending birthdays and the like. nishiki cared about the#little things .. and he made kiryu want to care about them too but theres just something different between them because nishikis always#been a better person than him .. and he would tell haruka in a voice that sounded like he was begging her to understand that nishiki wasnt a#bad person.. though he did bad things he was a good man and he still wishes with all his heart that he could have done more to save him ...
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bibiana112 · 11 months
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I'm going to draw wktd fanart (to cope with a highly specific situation) while I still have the time for it (looming employment) and that is a promise to myself (I probably have something else I said I'd work on but whatever)
#I strt at the end of the month and I'm#I'm not even gonna say I'm scared I'm not I'm just not quite excited either? I'll pull through#and hopefully eat better and be able to buy fun things thaNK FUCK#however also taxes. I am not looking forward to taxes#like it's literally an ideal position if I don't manage it for whatever reason that'll be uh. something big for me to find out limits wise#but it's whatever I'm curious and I gotta try#and like I said god I'll be so happy to be able to afford hyper specific autism approved food that's gonna make everything so much easier#oh also the hyper specific situation? don't worry about it. just know I'm going to cry into whatever I draw for that game atm#I mentioned it in the post I made about it these days I literally skimmed through lines of one of the endings and immediately cried a single#Annoying tear. I feel like I don't cry about life things as much as would be healthy to and when I do I don't cry right#so I just get so annoyed at these sudden single tear moments when I'm not even putting effort into anything they just leak out#because something on a screen hit too close to home in an instant but I can't even properly Feel it because I'm focused on something else#and the thing in question has well been Acknowledged and rendered Irrelevant#it's not satisfying like crying for being engrossed on a story and/or characters and I absolutely hate how idk picturesque? it feels#people criticize drawing crying with a pretty single tear all the time it feels so fake and forced to fit the medium in a way that's still#appealing and consumable but I'm just a person with depersonalization issues. reverse derealization. everything's real except me#anyways I wasn't spiraling I will continue to not spiral about that at this moment but that's constantly there in my brain#and I'm going to draw the body horror lesbian polycule about it#Void fala aí#oh yeah I promised field sib content uh I can easily do that as a warm-up on a work day obviously pfft#''end of the month'' she's so pretentious you mean next week
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apathyfairy · 1 year
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not me pulling up to the starbucks drive thru looking as ugly as humanly possible only to realize that the cute barista boy is working and he got a haircut and he's even cuter than before i fear
#i want to say thank you to my two best friends: oversized sweatshirt and sunglasses for doing their best to hide me#anyway. i didnt see him for so long i thought he quit so i was like good for him but there he is rip me#let me tell u what im not going to do and that is end this hell year with a crush on top of everything else lol so im joking but also not#anyway not to be crazy but here's what happened. i got to the order thing and i was like i have a pickup pls#and i was like oh no it's him bc he's literally the only man that works at that starbucks and he was like ok! drive to the window#and i was like oh wait can i have 2 waters too and he was like oh. i got u :) and i was like.. noooo dont say things like that to me..#but i was like ok thank u!!! and then i get up there and he's about to hand me the drinks and im like ok yeah he's cuter than i remembered#then he pulls back the drinks and he's like oh wait actually do u need a drink carrier?? and i was like nah im good :) even though i did#and then he gives me 2 trenta waters!!!! trenta!! and im like thank u!!! and he's like yeah!!#anyway. thank u have a good day u too etc etc. but his smile really is sm else tbh.#Anyway. my scorpio venus is trying to break out of the prison i locked her up in but it's not happening.#especially bc if i have a crush. it's not a crush. but if i had a crush on him he'd end up being a scorpio that's just the way my life goes#and im not letting that happen again so im gonna keep watching gilmore girls and rory and dean to remind myself that i do not want or#need a relationship.#but that's a whole other issue bc im on the episode where they finally break up and then the jess thing is going to start#ok nevermind ill watch 48 hours instead ok bye
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taketheringtolohac · 1 year
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what if I just screamed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and cried!!!!!!!!
#local girl forced to deal with everything on its own due to incompetency of parents 5 dead 24 injured.#I’m all of the ppl who were harmed. i am. i just wish I could ask someone about things and get a good answer#that didn’t make me feel like. well. you know. but yeah.#and then INVITING THEMSELVES UP FOR MY BIRTHDAY.#like. yeah I don’t have plans and I won’t have friends up there yet but also. maybe ask me first instead of just deciding 😔#but also I might not even be able to do any of that bc ! none of this might happen!#bad things just keep happening and it keeps making me just. want to quit the whole process and stay here and give up#but I already bought the car so now I have to commit and just. yeah. yeah. i wanna scream#i am trying to vent less on the internet but also there is nowhere else to put this!!!!! i don’t have ppl to vent to so now this is my diary#but yeah. I’m just. going crazy. i know I should be doing my own research but also god would it kill you to even try.#like literally no effort has ever been made to help me it’s just an afterthought of like oh have you thought about x when I thought abt x#like weeks ago. and it’s always been this way. or me going yes I’ve thought abt x and them going oh good and then not offering any more help#i would just like to be given proper guidance once in my life. just once.#that didn’t feel like ripping my heart and all my guts out of my body. like just once in my life yk is it too much to ask for#but no I’m the only one with any fucking vision around here and I hate it so much#whatever. it’s fine. I’ll suffer through another day tomorrow. its fucking fine.
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logansdoll · 2 months
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jim beam
navigating life in a new universe was already a bit of a struggle for Logan... and Wade just had to make it worse (or far, far, far better) by giving him a "house-warming gift".
CW: suggestive, profanity, takes place after the events of Deadpool 3, Wade is actually really hard to write for, Logan deserves the world, comfort, angst if you squint, etc.
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"Honey, I'm home!" Wade loudly sang, kicking open the door to Logan's apartment with a dramatic flourish.
"Fuck me," Logan groaned from his spot on the couch, closing his eyes and allowing his head to lull back with annoyance.
This defeated the entire purpose of why he got his own apartment in the first place.
To avoid these types of interactions with the most persistently, consistently annoying asshole in the entire multiverse.
"Now, now, is that any way to talk to the friend who's about to bring your long lost lover back from the dead?" Wade tutted, skipping into the living room, taking notice of the bottle of liquor resting in Logan's hand.
'So it's that kinda morning...'
"Jim Beam at 10 am on a Tuesday?" he noted, "Well, I guess it's five o'clock nowhere... so have at it."
"What did you just say?" Logan sat up straight, brows furrowed as he focused on Wade's previous statement.
"Alcoholics everywhere salute you for taking your liver where no organ has gone before."
"Wade."
"I'm honestly starting to believe you do it for the love of the game rather than the expositional, look how sad he is plot device the author is currently using... I mean, seriously? Can we skip past all this bullshit and get to the—"
Quickly, Logan grabbed him by the front of his suit, yanking him closer with an angrily confused expression.
"If anything besides a goddamn answer comes out of your mouth... I will stab you in the face," he growled, spelling out each syllable to further his point. "What the hell do you mean bring her back from the dead?"
To Logan, you were everything
The sun. The moon. The air. The clouds.
Despite seeing all the horrible thing he'd done, and knowing firsthand just how much of an asshole he could be, you still smiled at him.
No matter how many times he pushed you away, you were relentless.
Keeping his room together while he was away finding himself.
Making him meals when you noticed he he'd gone without eating.
Forcing him to take breathers after intense sessions in the Danger Room.
For the longest, he couldn't wrap his head around someone like you caring about a jackass like him.
Until he got fed up and just outright asked.
But, as if nothing, you answered:
"Your past makes think you don't deserve love, Logan," you started, crossing your arms over your chest as you leaned up against the counter. "You storm around here with a rude ass attitude and a smart mouth hoping to convince me of that... but if anything, you're only making it worse for yourself."
You smiled, looking up at him with a glint in your eye that sent shocks running down his spine.
"Because in my heart of hearts I know you're a man who wants care and attention, just like everybody else."
With a chuckle, you rested a hand on his shoulder, giving it a reassuring squeeze.
"And I'll keep shovin' dinners down your throat until you realize that."
Despite having everyone else fooled, you saw right through him, and true to your word, you didn't give up.
With every made bed, every meal, every conversation, Logan felt himself falling deeper into your charm, and over a glass of Jim Beam did he finally realize that he was in love with you.
But, like everything else he cared about in this world, you were taken away from him.
Unable to find your body in the rubble of the mansion, he looked high and low, quite literally going to the ends of the Earth to find you.
But after years of searching with nothing to show for it, he returned to the bottle, drowning himself in sorrow and regret.
Or, at least... until now.
"Well, according to the manual, she's not exactly dead, but she is unconscious," Wade answered, matter-of-factly.
"Unconscious?" Logan's brows furrowed, still quite confused.
Freeing himself from the man's grip, Wade stood up, going back around the couch and pulling out a small tablet from his pocket.
"See, I've noticed your humble abode could use a little sprucing, so I went back to our buddies at the TVA and kindly reminded them that you saved the multiverse and, godammnit, you deserve a reward."
"Get to the fuckin' point, jackass," Logan spat, turning to face him.
"So they sent some men back to your universe and found your girl!" Wade cheered, opening up a portal and reaching his hand in, pulling out a cryo-chamber with you inside.
The moment Logan's eyes met your sleeping face, all color and vibrancy seemed to return to the world.
He was at a loss for words.
You were here... not some dream or hallucination of guilt... but actually, truly, physically here.
"Apparently, some science fuckers were keeping her in a black site and testing to see how long she could go without aging. I won't bore you with the details," Wade explained, pulling out a small knife from his boot. "Now, let's break this bad boy open and meet the future Mrs. Wolverine!"
Before Logan could stop him, Wade stabbed the keypad at the side of the chamber, opening the door and sending you falling forward.
In an instant, Logan dropped his bottle and leaped over the couch, catching you just before you could face-plant on the hardwood floor.
"Watch it!" Logan roared, less than happy that you'd only been there for about three minutes and Wade had already almost broken your nose.
"I am so sorry!" Wade gasped, his hands slapping his cheeks in shock. "I didn't think she'd actually fall out the chamber when they told me she'd fall out the chamber... Nice save, though, Romeo."
Turning you over, Logan cupped your cheek, the chill of your skin already beginning to warm.
But you were still out cold, limp in his grasp as he held you close to his chest.
"She's not waking up..." Logan noticed, brows furrowed. "Why the hell isn't she waking up?"
"Easy there, tiger. They told me how long it takes varies from person to person," Wade assured, shutting the portal. "Some take minutes, others hours. It could be a couple of days before she even opens her eyes."
An expression of solemnity slid over Logan's face as he gazed over yours, your skin still so flesh colored, it looked as if you were sleeping.
Just as soft and tender as he remembered.
And he had full intentions on keeping it that way.
Tucking a strand of hair behind your ear, he ghosted his hand over your cheek.
In that moment, he swore to himself that he'd never leave you again.
He'd be a friend, a bodyguard, a lover, whatever you wanted, but no matter his title, anything that wanted to harm you would have to do so over his dead body.
And even then he'd force himself to get back up and fight.
This world was giving him a second chance at life, a second chance at a life with you, and he'd be damned if he let anything ruin it.
Suddenly, you took in an aggressive gasp, scaring the shit out of Wade as your eyes snapped open.
"Holy fucking shit nuggets!" he jolted, jumping from his spot across he room as Logan allowed his shoulders to sink, mumbling a quiet thanks to whatever god or deity brought you back to him.
Feeling a strong set of arms cradling you, you looked up, solace setting into your bones at the sight of the familiar man before you, who was unable to stop the few joyful tears escaping his eyes.
"Logan—"
Without a moment's hesitation, his lips were on yours, making up for what felt like a lifetime of loss by dumping all of his passion, all of his love, all of his devotion into one Earth shattering kiss.
You melted into it seamlessly, your hand finding home in his scruffy hair as he pulled you flush against him, clutching you with a death grip.
Donning a cheeky smile under his mask, Wade turned away to give you both a moment, thought not without making a crude sex gesture behind his back.
'I don't think Miss (Y/N)/Girl Sitting At Home Reading This is gonna be able to walk tomorrow...'
With a gasp, the two of you separated, Logan's hand raising to cup your cheek, relishing how easily you leaned into him.
"(y/n)... I thought I lost you," he panted, his eyes scouring over your face, committing every detail to memory.
"For a while, you did," you sighed with a grin, carding a hand through the few gray strands in his hair, before comparing them to your own. "Time looks good on you."
He chuckled, quietly relieved you still found him attractive after all these years.
Sitting up, you wrapped your arms around him and pulled the man into a bone crushing hug, nuzzling your face into the crook of his neck.
"I'm not really sure what happened... or how I'm alive..." you weakly laughed, starting to get choked up. "But I know that if you go out drinking without me ever again, I'm putting your head on a spike."
Instantly, Logan's arms wrapped around your waist, holding you reverently as if he let go for one moment, the powers that be would part him from you.
"I swear on my life... I'll never let anyone hurt you again."
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starkeyisthelastname · 3 months
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okay y’all, we are jumping into this. pornstar!rafe makes a big decision. ⭐️ (thank you to my bae @oceandriveab for her request and being so patient! 💖 )
He had quite literally fucked you to sleep after storming off set all because he couldn’t get his dick up because he had you on his mind. He knew the decision he had to make and that was one he never thought he would ever do and that quit filming professionally. Even if he hadn’t opened up to you much at all, and he was terrified of confessing his feelings to someone he only had ever fucked, he couldn’t continue on with this career because his addiction was now you.
You should have known better than to answer the door because as you woke up the next morning with a sore body, an empty bed and no sign or explanation from Rafe. You should have expected this and him telling you he couldn’t work anymore because he couldn’t get you off his mind was a bunch of bullshit. He told you from the start he loved pussy too much to ever quit, and you should have stopped falling for him right there. You may been acting on high emotions, but you picked up your phone and began texting him.
Rafe’s phone had been on silent when he had met with his agent and manager. He flat out told them that he was done and they laughed, an amused look on both of their faces. The ‘pussy slayer’ was retiring at 30? There was no way. Everyone knew how much he loved pussy, I mean.. what else was he gonna do? Even if he hadn’t told you much about him, or knew much about you, he knew what he felt for you was enough for him to find a new purpose in life. He knew he said he needed to take baby steps because this was all new to him, but he was tired of the jealousy he constantly felt, the way he couldn’t get you off his fucking mind. He had to show you how he felt and then would let everything fall into place after, it could have been a reckless decision but he didn’t care.
‘I don’t expect a relationship with you, but when you come to my house and tell me that I’m yours just to dip off without any explanation is bullshit Rafe. I can’t do these games with you anymore. You wanna focus on work so bad. Fine. So will I.’
You had blocked him after you sent it, whether it was right or wrong. You didn’t want to, in fact it hurt you to think about Rafe not being in your life. What hurt worse though was how this man had ruined you to the point he never left your mind, that every time he shot a scene with someone else you were filled with nothing but jealousy, and that you couldn’t continue on knowing he would constantly feed you this shit so that he could get a nut in a few times a week. Your insecurities were becoming overshadowed by fear, because you had no idea what Rafe had just done.
You had a feeling you knew who it was by the heavy knocks on your door. You didn’t want to answer and you wanted to tell him to go away. Your own body betrayed you as you began walking over to the door to answer it. He better have a damn good reason on why he was here after his little Houdini act he pulled.
“You wanna block me now?” Rafe asked, stepping through the door without another thought.
You shrugged, arms crossed over your chest as you challenged him. “Why does it matter Rafe? I should have never got my feelings involved with someone who only cares about fucking on camera and getting money from it.” You told him, avoiding his gaze. Maybe it was your own fault because he didn’t know exactly how you felt, but he certainly didn’t make it easy for you. When he whispered sweet shit in your ear it made you feel like you could tell him that you were falling for him. It would then reel back to you being afraid of rejection because he would disappear, or talk about how he loved his career too much to ever quit.
“Do you even know what I was doing? I was firing my agent and my manager because I told them I was done fucking doing porn.” He said, causing your eyes to meet his.
You didn’t believe him. There was no way the man who was obsessed with sex and couldn’t even give you a real reason on why he became a pornstar in the first place had really quit. You laughed, did he really think you were that dumb? “You are lying. You’ve hit an all time low if you think that you can tell me something like that just to fuck me again.” You said with a scoff.
Rafe did a lot of punk shit to try and hide his feelings from you, but this wasn’t something he would joke about. He laughed, shaking his head. “You think I’m lying? I fuckin quit because I love you!” He said, blurting it out before he stopped himself. It was like once he said it, he couldn’t stop the rest from flowing as he continued on. “You don’t understand how hard this is for me! This career is the only thing I have had that has made me feel worth something because I fucked everything else up in my life. This is what made me feel invincible and that I could be somebody. I don’t have anyone else because everyone pushed me away due to my choices. Then I meet you and I don’t even fucking know you, but I feel this insane connection that absolutely terrifies me. It scares me the way I feel about you, and that I really should be taking baby steps. I.. I just can’t though. I don’t want to fuck this up like I did everything else, but… I am fucking in love with you and fucking random girls on camera just to get money isn’t worth losing you over.” He told you.
This was the first time Rafe had ever truly been honest with you and you could read it all over his face. You swallowed the lump in your throat as he stepped closer, taking you by the hands as he pulled you closer. “Let me show you.” He whispered in the softest voice you had ever heard him use. You didn’t know what he meant by that, but there was no way you were turning him away.
No matter how much you loved the brutal sex the two of you shared and we’re sure there was more of that to come, this was an entirely new feeling you both were experiencing. He was being gentle with you for the first time, pouring every ounce of confusing emotions and feelings he had into you. He had you in a deep missionary position, his toned hips grinding into yours as he buried his head in your neck. “You are so goddamn beautiful.” He whispered in a breathy groan.
His cock somehow felt 10 times bigger when he went slow and it was throwing you off at how good this fucking felt. Tears streamed down your face much like the first time he had ever fucked you, but for an entirely different reason. You overwhelmed by love, clinging onto him life a lifeline as you were afraid to let him go. He had ruined you for any other man and right now you were perfectly fine with that. “Rafe… you feel so fucking good..” You whimpered, your eyes rolling back at a little as his tip kept brushing over your g-spot.
Rafe groaned into your smooth skin, his lips traveling across your collarbone and across your jaw line until he met your eyes. He knew he must have really been in love with you because he had never made love and didn’t know he was capable of such a thing. He knew his nasty side was inevitable but he really was determined to show you that he was serious about this.
“Yeah baby, say my fuckin name. That’s yours to say. All yours… my sweet angel.” His words firm but genuine as his lips ghosted over yours. The way you made him feel was better than any drug or any career, and he knew no matter how scary this was for him, you were his girl without a doubt.
The tears flowed even more as he said that, your eyes falling into his ocean ones as his cock explored every inch of you. Your lower tummy fluttered and head spun as you felt an insane orgasm approaching. “Rafe… you’re gonna make me cum. Please don’t stop.. please.” You nearly begged him, manicured nails digging into the skin of his back.
Rafe had always prided himself for being able to go many rounds before cumming. He was so overwhelmed with love, that he knew he was wasn’t going to last long. “I’m not baby, I fuckin got you. Yeah? Cum all over my cock.” He whispered against your lips before pulling you in for a deep kiss.
You couldn’t help but sob at his words, trying your best to focus on the kiss as your orgasm started to take over. You screamed his name, not caring who heard, as this moment was way too important. You shuddered against him, wrapping your legs around his waist to trap him in as his thrusts started to get sloppy. He didn’t know what you had done to him, but he found himself going back to whisper in your ear as he started slowly coming undone. “I’m gonna fuckin fill you up baby, this is all for you..” He breathed out, voice rugged as his nuts tightened and eyes rolled back at your cunt still squeezing him in.
Rafe’s groans were sweet music to your ears as his seed warmed your insides, this time followed by a gentle raspy voice whispering against your skin. “I love you..” He told you, the butterflies hitting your belly and your face breaking out into a beautiful smile.
“I love you.” You whispered back.
Rafe hadn’t said that to someone or heard it back since before he had lost his family. This was the first girl he had ever felt this way about and while the two of you may have been jumping into something that was unclear and had a lot of questions that needed to be answered, he knew this was all worth it.
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stellarsagittarius · 6 months
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✨️🪐 7H in your Birth Chart: How you will meet your Future Spouse / Soulmate 🪐✨️
[Exchange readings open! Me (Astrology) x You (Tarot)] You can message me with your offer 🫶🏼.] CLOSED
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7H ruler in 1H
You will most likely meet your soulmate through a place where you are the center of attention, but this doesn't have to be something grand. Just them coming across your social media profile is a great example. You might be fairly closed off in the beginning to them, almost inaccessible. These are more informal places, where it concerns nobody but you. This is a place where you play an important role with either your looks or your thoughts. "You," are the focus.
7H ruler in 2H
You can meet them when you are shopping. Like this is THE example that came to my mind. Places could be banks, malls, stores, even restaurants. This meeting is more steady, like there is no rush, and there is a certain stability to how the meeting proceeds. Go to your favorite restaurants and coffee shops often, you can really bump into them over there. This is also a place where you get some sort of work done on your body, so consider salons, parlours, tattoo shops, etc.
7H ruler in 3H
You are supposed to be meeting them in a locality or neighborhood you visit often. This may even be your hometown. Meeting through siblings or very close cousins is a thing as well. This relationship can start off on social media as well, more on the side of common interests and communication. This can be that one thing where your person has been hidden in plain sight all along.
7H ruler in 4H
This meeting has high chances of happening through either of your parents or close family members. This is more of a traditional placement and in a sense, more slow and gradually building up. This person really is coming at your doorstep, but only when you know you aren't "closing yourself off." Their is a bit of being emotionally guarded in the initial phases of your relationship. You may quite literally meet them at your home, like a delivery person or someone from service like replace AC or fix wires.
7H ruler in 5H
You are meeting them when you are having a fun time. Partying and clubbing is one thing, and if you are into that then there is a chance this relationship can start off as a one night thingy. Otherwise consider picnics, hikes or even just going on a date by yourself. This is an activity you really enjoy and are doing it for the sake of simply doing it. There is no responsibilities or things you have to comform to. You may also meet them through a kid or around some sort of kindergarten/nursery/daycare.
7H ruler in 6H
Oh this one is like that one character which hasn't been unlocked yet, but are around you all the time. They are a part of your routined life, and you can meet them while running errands, at the gym or while on the commute. This is the hidden in plain sight type of person. Continue with your daily life, go on that walk, go to the gym, grab the lunch and they are somewhere around. The first meeting is going to be quite steady, and everything will gradually develop from there.
7H ruler in 7H
This meeting is going to very special, in a way that you won't feel like someone else has a hand here. You will feel like it's just you and your person, whatever the situation. This could start as a partnership of some sort or a friendship. You will meet them more from their efforts, they will make the first contact. There is no hidden meaning or other intentions behind them approaching you. It's very direct, mainly because they want to get to know you. You can meet them anywhere, honestly, with this placement, but it will be more one-on-one. Like believe me, you won't have any other work besides them when you meet them. It's a great thing to have the ruler of your 7H in 7H, so this explaination definitely deserved a longer explanation. You are one of those people who are actually going to be in a strong soulmate connection that will be very prominent in your life. This is magical, even I don't know how to explain this. Look for any placements in your 7H, that will tell you specific qualities about your Soulmate, and perhpas give you specific insights on the meeting!
7H ruler in 8H
You will meet them through other people or through things having to do with other people. It's like a series of events that other people have you involved in, and then you bump into them. Like your friend asked you to accompany them to a party, and then they are like, "Hey, meet this person. They are very cool!" And that person they introduced you to turns out to be your soulmate. You may meet them though after some sort of hardship or change in your life, like a transformative one.
7H ruler in 9H
You can meet them through travel or on social media. Let's just say it, there is a physical distance between you both initially, and they may even be from another culture/country. The 9H always has a foreign connection, always! You may meet them on vacation or while on a work trip. There is also going to be a very interesting few exchanges, like they are from a different place and so you are, and you will have that natural curiosity to understand each other.
7H ruler in 10H
You will meet them through work or some sort of work network. The initial meeting could be very formal and you may have this tendency to think of your "image" in front of them, like wanting to make a good impression, etc. This is not necessarily a co-worker, that's more of a 6th house thing. They are someone new you happen to connect with because of work, like someone a rank lower or high than you, or some new business partner. Common work is something connecting both of you.
7H ruler in 11H
You can meet them through mutual friends, communities or networks. This is a more relaxed scenario, like I know a lot of people aren't just out there social, but think of it as going to a college party with some of your friends and that's where you find your person. It is not "through" someone, instead you will initiate that conversation yourself because you genuinely find them interesting, and then perhaps you get to know that you have shared acquaintances. It's a social place, somewhere you are out of your shell and making other connections.
7H ruler in 12H
You can meet them through some sort of solo activity. Like it is solitude. So maybe you are in a new country and don't know anyone just yet. Some places are hospitals, retreats, meditation centers, certain places of worship, or even certain abandoned places. It is a very calming meeting, like there will be a lot of peace in this. You may even happen to dream of them before you meet. There could be a bit of mystery to the first few meetings. This is a supposed to be a connection that will help you release a lot of karma.
Check out more Astrology content on my page 🎀🫶🏼.
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snapscube · 2 months
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I FINISHED TURNABOUT BIG TOP! Which means here is my updated autopsy report ranking for cases and characters!
Both have actually shifted around quite a bit so you may find it an interesting update. I'll explain some of my current thoughts on the new placements as well as my thoughts on 2-3 in general below a break if ur curious.
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Okay so first thing let's just address the elephant in the room: We have an all new category on the character ranking!! One that I sure wish I didn't have to include but unfortunately Big Top made some... very Interesting decisions with specific characters. It would be one thing if this content was featured and then addressed, but it was particularly off-putting and frustrating to me that everything was played entirely straight?? So yeah. New lowest of the low category for a couple freaks who are actively courting a 16 year old!!!! yayyyyyy
OTHERWISE, I do have to say.... I was really pleasantly surprised at 2-3 as a case. I can say now I completely understand people having a distaste for it especially in regards to the unsavory age gaps, but literally..... almost everything else in this case was well put together and generally on-par with the quality of the rest of the series? As an overall package I actually still find Turnabout Samurai infinitely more dull. Like, maybe it's just because the lead-up to actually playing it was so uniquely frustrating for me and forcibly lowered my expectations by a ton, but there was so much good shit in Big Top. Maya, in particular, is in top form during this case. She is so fucking funny. I loved almost every word that came out of her mouth and it really solidified her top spot in the character ranking for me at present. But past that, I think the second half of this case is EXTREMELY strong compared to its opening half. I'll admit during the first trial section I was getting kinda tired with it and finding it hard to care given how much I just do not root for Max, so I had tentatively placed it at bottom of C tier. But then once von Karma arrives in the investigation section and then Acro's storyline enters the equation I really think it finds its footing. I actually found the last few scenes of the trial very emotionally effective, especially Acro's breakdown at the witness stand and mentioning how he couldn't follow through with taking his own life to escape his crime due to his desire to see his brother wake up. Like... I legitimately teared up.
And FURTHERMORE.... von Karma. Oh my god. I don't know if I'm picking up on anything here, nor do I want to know until I maybe see it for myself, but something about her conduct in the final trial really spoke to me. I feel like a surface read makes it apparent that she's just as frustrated as she is because she's losing the case to Wright again, and I do think that's a huge factor still to her reaction... but I don't know, I felt something else with her. Particularly when it came to her reaction towards Acro's attempted murder of Regina. I felt like she came across as PARTICULARLY disgusted towards that revelation and towards her own client in a way that subtly humanized her and had me just CHUCKLING AND CHORTLING in evil anticipation towards potential character arcs. I really hope I've grasped onto something here because... I love her so much. I love the idea that in spite of her reputation we're still gonna get to see this spark of humanity light up. AHHHHH.
Okay. Anyway. In summary:
I understand why people have a distaste for Big Top now, but it does not change the fact that I desperately wish I had been given the chance to experience the story myself going into it without that baggage. It genuinely did not help my experience in the slightest to just have that cloud of expectation over it and it is generally irritating that I couldn't even bring up that I was playing it without people jokingly apologizing to me or telling me that I wouldn't be able to handle it or whatever. Really not a great vibe.
As a case, it has a couple MAJOR, GLARING points of discomfort but I'm still really glad I gave it a chance and was able to find a lot of good in it anyway. It inspired me to unfortunately lower some of my other rankings because this is what I kind of consider a more middle-of-the-road quality for the series now. Solid B tier. I have played much worse.
Maya Fey is a god damn treasure.
As for some of the other character shifts, particularly in relation to some of the characters who got bumped from S to A rank, that's less because I decided I like them less now than I did when I first ranked them and more that I decided my initial interpretation of my feelings was incongruent in some cases. Like, for example I LOVE Mia I really do she's great, but in no way at this current time is she on the same level as Maya or Lana for me. So I just needed to adjust the ratios a bit.
Anyway, I'll be back eventually with posts about the next case and the last one of AA2! :3 I hear it's pretttyyy long but pretttyyy damn GOOD. Can't wait.
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hor3nee · 6 months
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• Fatherhood •
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What kind of dads are the JJK men ?
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CW/TW: GN! Reader, Mentions of crappy parenting, BREIF mention of pregnancy in Geto's, (Lmk if I should add anything else!)
Characters: Gojo, Geto, Nanami, Sukuna, Toji x Reader
AN: Almost cried writing this the baby fever is going HARD rn dude. Headcanons !
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• Gojo •
Menace of a father, but in the good way! Gojo spends his years raising his kids as if he's their best friend, truly and genuinely treats his kids as equals and in a sweet way, allows his children to have complete trust in him. Because Gojo is quite childish himself, he loves playing with his kids, making a fool of himself, and indulging with them.
Has a bit of a bad side to this though, his lack of traditional discipline or making himself the 'adult' in the situation leads the kids to both be very spoiled and not really ever listen to him.
"Sweetheart, darling, my perfect angel, can you please go to bed?? pretty please! Help your old man here, please??"
"Nuh uh!" And with that bout of defiance, he's back to running up to you, like HE'S the child, begging for your help. Because it seems you're the only one who can get the kids in line, and you do.
Plays pranks and teases the hell out of his kids as they get older, always in a loving way of course, but nonetheless loves getting them flustered over his stupidity. Type of dad to do dumbass dances in the middle of a Walmart to embarrass his kids.
• Geto •
Geto is optimum of what it means to be a gentle parent. Cannot, for the life of him, bring it in himself to yell at his kids. He's so soft-spoken, never so much as raising his voice against his children. Geto has children who respond to his voice alone, because it's so lulling, he's familiarized them with it and made them feel safe with it.
Doesn't mean he can't discipline them, of course he can, and he does so extremely gracefully. Whenever you're on your last straw with the kids, fighting the urge to start scolding them and yell, he steps in, smoothly taking over and the kids instantly listen to him.
"We're your parents, honey, c'mon that's not very nice to say, is it? They carried you for 9 months you know. Say sorry." Like magic the kids shut up and come over to you apologizing while Geto stands back, calmly having fixed the situation with ease.
With everything Geto does, has done, experienced etc, he can sometimes feel conflicted. Geto knows what he is capable of, and what he has done, he's extremely self-aware even if he justifies it, and he can struggle to balance the weight of all of it while also remaining a dutiful father.
Despite it, he does wonders keeping it separate from what his children have to see or experience, teaches them respect and kindness and hopes they hold true to it.
• Nanami •
Not a single man on this list fathers as hard as Nanami fathers. He's built for it like no other. Nanami treats fatherhood with his all, he puts his all into it and makes damn certain he does right by it. Stern when necessary, sweet when needed, provides for his kids and refuses to miss any important milestone of theirs.
Nanami is a calm man but the second work starts piling potentially making him miss his kids school play or something he's arguing with his supervisors and ready to throw hands.
He keeps the drawings his kids make on his desk, alongside a photo of you and your kids. Literally just stares at it while working smiling, unable to wait till he's home with the kids. They are his pride and joy genuinely.
No matter how over-worked Nanami may be though, when he comes home you are basically on vacation. Insists you rest and he takes over literally everything involving the kids.
"Darling, darling no, I got this covered. You take rest. You know I love spending time with my kids." He says with an earnest smile, both kids in his beefy arms just dangling around and playing with their father. He's definitely exhausted from work, but that never stops him.
• Sukuna •
The King of the Curses, as cruel and terrifying as he is, taking pleasure in all sorts of sickness and treating love as pointless, legitimately likes his kid.
He doesn't care about fatherhood, or the responsibilities that being a parent entails, but it's nice having a mini version of himself around. That he likes. An extension of himself and you, it's nice to have around he doesn't mind it. He may act aloof about it, not outwardly showing affection like hugs or kisses, but he clearly enjoys it.
He gets a massive ego trip when his kids cause chaos and disturbances. Points at them laughing with his belly "See that? That's mine."
Sukuna never minces his words though, and his kids have to get used to his bluntness. Again, he doesn't care for the concept of 'parenting', and will in their face call the kid some extreme insults and weak and they have to learn to take it.
On the flip side, Sukuna also never minces his praise, and Sukuna has an abundance to give his kids. Every accomplishment or show of strength that they show he'll let them know he's proud. A good ol' fashioned fatherly slap to their shoulder while he praises them.
He treasures his children, and even if he doesn't put much effort into parenting them, you taking over most of it, he's definitely a present figure in their lives.
• Toji •
Went to get milk, hasn't been seen since.
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junicult · 1 year
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!! the bachelors when they’re horny
contains ; much suggestive content. fem!farmer. established relationships (marriage). reader has hair that can be put into a ponytail. nsfw, no actual smut. sorta proofread.
note ; here’s another apology for disappearing :,,
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harvey.
- the love of my life.
- he’s more of a romantic.
- so he tends to take a sweeter, gentler route into hinting at him being in the mood.
- it’s not a hard task, either.
- this man is so in love with you. when he’s in love, it can just be the sight of you to turn him on.
- some of the easiest, i’d say is anything that reminds him he’s married to you.
- like yeah, of course he knows that, but it always makes his day when he reminds himself of it.
- such as coming home to you, making dinner for you or when you make dinner for him.
- sitting in ur home together, eating and talking about your day. just reminds him of the fact that he gets to do this with you, and no one else does.
- since he knows how busy you are, he absolutely loves being a househusband. spoiling you by doing all the household chores while you work your ass off outside.
- and he genuinely enjoys doing that,
- but on the rarer occasion when you take most of the day off, and he’s out at work—that’s what really gets him.
- the smallest gesture of picking up his empty plate and washing the dishes.
- when you constantly say, “honey, i’ve got it,” as he tries to help…it does something to him.
- it’s a small act of love that shows him you care so much about him without saying it.
- now, maybe it wasn’t your intention to turn him on. i mean, it’s quite literally a regular, basic gesture—
- but here he is. throat aching, palms starting to sweat and his growing hard-on straining in his pants.
- all because you showed basic human decency.
- lol.
- also because it’s the love of his life doing it for him, but still. he can’t help it. he’s just so infatuated with you.
- as for getting the hint across to you? ofc he’s not gonna fucking say it.
- he overthinks everything. and the last thing he’d want is for you to feel obligated just because he wants to.
- but there’s an obvious tell when it comes to harvey, and it’s not just the fact that his cheeks get all red.
- it’s the way he starts to fumble over his sentences, mumbling and stuttering his words.
- he’s not very smooth i fear.
- but that’s what we love about him🫶
- it doesn’t take long to realize you’ve got him tense. feel free to tease him a bit.
- the minute you show you’re on the same page, however, he gets a pick up in his confidence.
- whenever he’s turned on like this, it’s always the best for you.
- his beautiful wife does something sweet for him? then you better believe he’s going to be even sweeter to you.
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sam.
- i’ve said this before,
- but it’s not hard to get him in the mood.
- show him even the tiniest sign that you’re horny, and he is too.
- what can i say, he’s a simple man.
- now, don’t mistaken that as anybody that comes along, shows a little affection can turn him on. bc that’s not true. at all.
- in fact, he’s incredibly oblivious to that kinda stuff. if he gets hit on, he’ll just take it as a compliment.
- it’s you that turns him on. it’s your affection. it’s the fact that you want him.
- bc he’s just that in love with you, he gets all excited when he’s in those situations with you.
- SO!!
- he gets so cute when he’s needy.
- he’s always down hug and hold you, trust me. his love language is for sure physical touch.
- even just in general, he has to be holding your hand while you’re standing together, he’s latched onto you when you’re laying together. he’ll even hold onto you as you’re cooking dinner. he loves touching you.
- and when he’s horny it’s no different.
- it’s so random, but one of his major turn ons is watching tie your hair out of your face.
- super casually, too. can be mid-conversation, or he just catches a glimpse of you doing it across the room.
- “your mom wants a me to bring a largemouth bass for dinner tonight, can you feed the chickens please?” your explain as you secure your ponytail with a hairtie.
- he’s all sorts of distracted, obviously listening to your request but he can’t help but focus on the action.
- “yeah, for sure—totally,” he nods, and the minute u walk out the door he has to let out a large huff of breath.
- another thing that vvvv much turns him on is when u walk fresh out of the shower with only a towel on.
- like, i’m talking u can still see the droplets of water on your shoulders, and your hair is soaking to the touch.
- he’s a simple man i said.
- and what’s funny is, he always showers with you.
- so seeing you like that will happen 9/10 times after u shower.
- he looks pretty much identical to you, too. same sopping wet hair and towel around his waist.
- he’s cute with it though. like, ofc he stares at you, but he’s got the cutest smile & obvious flush across his cheeks.
- mumbles a soft, “you just look really pretty,” after you ask about it.
- …idk abt u but he’s getting it after that.
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shane.
- there’s no hiding it.
- he’ll straight up tell you.
- honestly, i feel like every time he’s with you or he sees you, he’s always at least a little turned on.
- within reason of course.
- i mean, how can he not be?
- it’s just like, when you’re that in love, he’ll find you beautiful no matter what. and if you’re literally covered in dirt or soot from the mines head to toe, if you tell him ur horny he is not complaining 💀
- simply put, he’s always down.
- he’s very respectful, however. he knows if the time isn’t right.
- but anyways, when he’s rly horny, it’s not hard to figure it out.
- he makes so much more eye contact, and becomes like the most intense listener.
- i don’t want it to sound like he isn’t already a good listener, he’s not an asshole (for the most part <3)
- it’s not like he’s doing the bare minimum just to get in your pants. he becomes such an intent listener because he’s turned on from the way you talk.
- like he’s enchanted. he could listen to you forever. he genuinely wants you to continue.
- when ur lying in bed together before going to bed, casually recapping your day and he can’t help but think about how pretty you look while u innocently put lotion on.
- and then his thoughts wander. and then he’s thinking the other pretty sounds your voice makes.
- and once you finish, you ask a sweet, “so how was your day, handsome?”
- he’s all, “pretty boring. missed you a ton.”
- you’re too deep in your relationship to know his compliment is also a pickup line, and that his thumb rubbing your thigh isn’t him just showing affection.
- it’s only a matter of time before he’s looking over at you with the smallest smirk and glazed eyes.
- “you feeling okay? still got some energy left?”
- not subtle indeed.
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sebastian.
- in the beginning of ur relationship, he was turned on by many things you did, but he’d wait until he had an actual excuse.
- let me explain,
- when you were getting ready for bed, and he was spending the night, he’d watch you delicately take off your jewelry and carefully put them away—instant turn on.
- but it wasn’t until u joined him in bed, gave him a couple kisses on the cheek, & hinted that u were in the mood yourself when he’d fold.
- like he’d wait until he had an “excuse” for some reason.
- as for now, when ur relationship is very committed and ur living under the same roof, he stopped overthinking as much.
- instead of watching your dainty fingers unclasp each necklace, it was his to help you.
- then a gentle press of his soft lips to the center of your neck, & all he had to do was listen to your soft laugh, before you turned around and kissed him deeper.
- when he’s horny, that’s absolutely what he does. it saves him from outright saying it, and from making you feel bad if you aren’t. a win win.
- for sebastian to blatantly tell you he wants to have sex right now—he’s gotta be DEPRIVED.
- even though he’s comfortable with you, and no matter how long he’s been with you, he’s just not that kind of person to outright ask.
- plus, he likes when you come onto him. it’s an ego booster.
- he just loves u in general, and the fact that he knows u love him.
- now just bc i stated he doesn’t like to ask, doesn’t mean he never will.
- it’s rare, but he’s been with you for years. he’s bound to suggest it at least once.
- and if that were the case, he’ll still be shy about it.
- he’s been thinking about you all day, even clingy enough to bring himself out to help you with work.
- he’s sorta like ur shadow the entire day, and for a guy that deeply appreciates his alone time, it definitely doesn’t go unnoticed by you.
- “what’s up, sebby? you’ve been really clingy today.” you giggle, leaning into his touch that wraps around your waist.
- you’ll get nothing but a hum and a shrug for now.
- and by the time your chores are wrapped up, the sun is long since set, and you’re all cleaned and full from dinner—is when you finally pry it out of him.
- “you’re just usually not like this,” you giggle, running your fingers through his hair after kissing his cheek.
- “can i not show my wife affection?” he dryly jokes back, causing you to roll your eyes.
- “okay, i don’t need the attitude. of course you can.” you tease, smiling when he wraps his arms a little tighter around you and pulls you in for a kiss.
- “you just look extra beautiful today, and i wanna do something about it.” he all but shrugs, his voice low and quiet between his lips pressing against yours.
- “like what?”
- “why don’t you let me show you?”
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alex.
- pfft.
- he’ll tell you.
- he’ll actually make it known to whoever’s near. he has zero shame.
- he always gets rly horny whenever ur out in public together, like at dinner w friends, or at town gatherings.
- it’s definitely because he gets to see you all dressed up, spritzed with perfume and makeup done.
- trust me, the sight of you in your loungewear still makes him a horny. a different kind of horny, tho. i’ll get to that in a minute.
- but there’s something so satisfying abt showing up to an event with a fucking goddess by his side. you’re dressed to the nines and you’ve got his hand in yours.
- it’s like a silent bragging right that you fell in love with him, not anyone else.
- he’s a little possessive in that sense.
- when you guys haven’t seen each other in a couple hours, he’ll always come find you after a bit to check in.
- it’s so cute cus ur a little buzzed, and so is he.
- he’ll easily slot himself by your side, wrapping his arm around your waist and holding you close.
- just from the way your face immediately lights up, and a warm smile pulls at the corner of your cheeks is enough to turn him on.
- leans down to whisper in your ear, “when are you ready to head out? been dying to get this off of you,” while subtly tugging on the fabric hugging your hips.
- yeah, you’ll leave right after that😇
- and as for when he sees you in your loungewear,
- he tends to be a bit more loving.
- there’s definitely a side of him that only you bring out. he’s lowkey one of those guys that becomes such a softie when he’s alone with you.
- likes to hold u, or even be held if i may be so bold.
- so when he’s feeling particularly affectionate, mumbling abt how much he loves you and such, it tends to lead into a session or two.
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elliott.
- he’s just beyond enamored by you and everything you do.
- he’s similar to shane in the sense that, no matter what he’ll always find you beautiful, and sexy.
- he’s the kind of guy who gets his own satisfaction by giving you what you want. so if ur horny, and you wanna have sex, well so is he.
- but for elliott, it’s different.
- it’s not so much as being horny and looking to just fuck,
- it’s him being in love with you, and wanting to make love to you, y’know?
- so when he’s horny, it’s usually when he gets his alone time with you.
- after you’ve finished work for the day, already showered, & he’s decided to wrap up his own work, is when you two can finally relax together.
- “you were out there for a while. busy day?” he asks curiously, silently patting his knee for you to prop your foot up.
- “ah, yeah, y’know, most of my crops needed to be harvested today and i had to run to pierre’s to plant some more.” you sigh, leaning back and indulging in his affection.
- it’s gonna sound a little weird, i know, but i feel like he silently loves when you’re a little sore.
- no, not because you’re in pain, but because he just loves the excuse to soothe you.
- he loves rubbing your shoulders and back, rubbing your feet when you’re tired while you tell him about your day.
- it’s usually then when he becomes infatuated, and all he wants to do is hold you and kiss you all over.
- so after some back and forth, talking about whatever news came up over the few hours you’ve been apart, is when he’s the most in love.
- there’s never really a verbal agreement, you two usually just feel it at the same time, which is when you lean in and it gets a bit heated.
- he can’t possibly pick one single thing you do that makes him hornier then another. it’s everything you do.
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how2loa · 2 months
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HOW2LOA : ignore the 3D !
you have heard coaches tell you to ignore the 3D time and time again but you just can’t seem to be able to ignore the fact that the money isn’t in your bank account yet or that your physical appearance isn’t changing? we’ve all been there. let me help you!
be confident about your decision! say your affirmations with conviction. convince yourself that your visualization is real. if you affirm for ten minutes and then ask why is it not here yet i still see my circumstances well guess what? you’re just reaffirming that your circumstances exist.
literally pretend they’re not there. but if you choose to acknowledge them, think about it this way. why would they even bother you when you know you’re getting everything you want? the whole situation will turn out in your favor anyway so why would you bother worrying about 3D circumstances when you know how the ending will be. its like knowing a secret everyone else doesn’t know.
you don’t have to make yourself feel crazy or feel delusional like you’re lying to yourself, but if you know that you staying consistent with thinking as if and ignoring your circumstances will make them disappear then why wouldn’t you just do that? be patient and stay discipled, if you don’t have it you’re not done. keep thinking as if.
i know that sometimes we are faced with circumstances that we cannot ignore like having to pay a bill. i think what we often get mixed up when we hear the phrase “ignore the 3D” is that we think we have to ignore all circumstances and responsibilities in real life. NO! what you are affirming in your head, does not have to match what you are physically doing in real life. if you want to manifest being a millionaire, going out and shopping like one when you’re earning minimum wage and have bills to pay will get you in debt! do whatever you need to do in the 3D and while doing it, just affirm against it in your head. why would you quit your job to live as if you’re a millionaire when you’re still depending on that job for income in your 3D? that will just stress you out even more because you’re now depending on your manifestation to survive.
not to say you cannot manifest while depending on the manifestation, but there’s no need to put yourself in that position willingly. thinking as if and your actions in the 3D don’t have to match. it doesn’t matter what you’re doing in the 3D anyways since it’ll change in just a second right? so don’t mind what is happening out there and live in the 4D.
circumstances can disappear in a second, just like they appeared. and don’t even worry about the how. there’s infinite ways things can work out the way you want them to, you cannot even fathom all the possibilities. your job is to persist in your desired state, and the 3D must prove you right. it has no choice. unless you waver. so stay consistent and be stubborn until you get exactly what you want.
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deadsetobsessions · 9 months
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Your name is Tim Drake and you are nine years old.
Today, tomorrow, and soon, you're going to save Robin.
----
Tim stares at his reflection on the sink tap. It trembles, along with the plane, as he contemplates his situation.
His face is rounder, now, with unfamiliar baby-fat rounding out the sharp lines he'd come to expect. Even with the subpar reflection, Tim can tell that his dark eyebags are all but gone, replaced with youthful skin.
Magic. He's being quite literal, seeing as he's been tossed into the body of his younger self at the hands of a crazed magician.
He could find a way back... or he could create a completely different timeline by fixing everything that went wrong. It's not like he has anything to go back to, anyways. That crazed magician was actually competent and killed everyone he ever cared about. Tim barely got away with his life. He could go back to save that shell of a world- surrounded by people whose minds were broken beyond magical and medical repair- or stay here, fix his own personal troubles and cut off the magician before he could start with his world domination bullshit.
Well, Tim already has an idea of what he wants. So he begins a list, after having oriented himself.
Save Robin
There's no point trying to convince Bruce that he knows where Jason's being held. So, Tim finds himself on a plane to Ethiopia a day before Jason's meant to die. This was long before Barbara even thought of being Oracle, and the tech is ancient in his hands. In short order, nine year old Tim has a trust fund with millions in it, all siphoned from billionaires like Lex Luthor and his own parents.
Tim toddles back to his seat, after washing his hands because he still can't shake the extra bit of paranoia that came with a missing spleen. Oh. Tim blinks guilelessly at his seat neighbor, smiling like Timothy Drake, Angel of a Son as he reels from the realization that he still has his spleen.
Tim adds another box to his list:
Keep Ra's away from my spleen, creepy bastard.
What else...? Ah, the League of Assassins.
Damian
Tim pauses. Holy crap. Damian's only six right now. Tim moves Damian's box upwards in urgency. Tim might have a mildly antagonistic relationship with his younger brother back then, but he wants baby pictures of his siblings, dammit. He's gonna put that photography expertise to good use if it's the last thing he does.
Watch over Z, Owens, Pru
'They're alive!' His mind screams. Cold rationality slaps the sentimentality down with a quick 'But they won't be if I fail.'
His mind wanders to Dick Grayson. He scowls as something pops up in the back of his head.
Catalina Flores
Contact Nightwing- in space
He's gotta call Dick back from that Teen Titans mission, Jason's gonna need all of the support he's going to get.
Find Cass
Train Steph
Save Duke's family from Venom
Tim taps at that last point. He'll save them. But that might mean Duke might never join their family.
But he'll be happy and Tim... will deal with it. He'll be the only one mourning, anyways. To end on a lighter note, he adds something that he should have done ages ago.
Give Tam a raise.
Tim sighs as he gets out of the airport, the hired escort he found and vetted, delivering him to a predetermined hotel. They think his parents are already inside. He laughs and does not say anything to make them think otherwise. He has so many things to do, Tim laments as he settles down to track the Joker's movements. Here. That's where Jason's being held. Being tortured.
He can, however, knock two things off his list in one go. Tim picks up the burner phone he acquired. He doesn't have time, or else he would have done this sooner and saved them all the trouble.
[RR: Are you in Ethiopia yet?]
[Deathstroke: Payment confirmed. In Ethiopia.]
[RR: Third building by the docks.]
An hour.
[Deathstroke: Confirmed. Target spotted.]
Ten minutes.
[Deathstroke: Target eliminated. Bringing Robin to Safehouse.]
Twenty minutes.
[Deathstroke: Basic first aid applied. Leaving.]
[RR: Secondary payment sent. Confirm?]
[Deathstroke: Confirmed. Pleasure doing business with you.]
Tim sprawls on the king bed. He sighs a breath of relief. He'd check on Jason in person, if he weren't paranoid about leaving traces that would get back to him. Tim's pretty sure that Deathstroke's going to get hunted down in the near future, regardless, so he made sure to add a huge tip on top of the extra fees for burning one of Deathstroke's safe houses and the emergency first aid. He taps into the rudimentary camera Deathstroke had given him the access codes to, to stare at Jason's rising and falling chest. On a further table, the Joker's head laid in a preservation box.
He bypasses all of the security on the Teen Titan's tech to send Dick a message.
[Robin has been retrieved from the Joker. Contact Batman for details.]
Then, he sends Bruce the location of the safe house. Tim spends the rest of the day staring at Jason and watching his father in another timeline break as he huddles close to the broken body of Tim's Robin.
Timothy Drake destroys the burner phone.
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