#it feels hella hard to to 12 classes.

[winn-wynn]

Lowkey feel like Percy Weasley had a time turner during his school years.

Is it possible to do 12 classes basically in a year when they all seem to be year round?

[jirsungs]

NO IDEA ☆ l.dh

pairing: loser!donghyuck x fem!reader

no idea synopsis: a story where both you and lee donghyuck seem to get what you want. he's the perfect pawn in making your ex-boyfriend jealous and the smarty pants tutor helping you pass your math class. donghyuck has it easy too, he's finally able to seek out and experience the world of dating through you, his long-devoted crush and surprisingly enthusiastic tutoring student. but then again, when meaningless tutoring sessions soon evolve into reciprocated feelings, is it really that easy?

genre: college au, nonidol au, fake dating au, social media au (includes written chapters), classmates to friends to lovers, he's a nerd & she's a popular cheerleader (you see where this is going), he fell first but she fell harder trope, kinda based off to all the boys i've loved before, fluff, crack/humor, angst, one-sided pining that turns into mutual pining

warnings: explicit language, unrealistic college partying, talks about family issues (this does NOT reflect any of the idol's families!), yuqi has an ex gf, some alcohol consumption, kys and sexual humor, bullying, hyuck and his buds are mistreated ☹️, hyunjin is a bad bf!!!, cheesy af, unrequited love, bad insults that sound like they're from the 2000s, HELLA miscommunication

no idea playlist: btr's no idea, taylor swift's you belong with me, the vamps + demi lovato's somebody to you, james arthur's can i be him, ariana grande's daydreamin, fitz & the tantrums' out of my league, shawn mendes' treat you better, bruno mars' just the way you are, lonely god's marlboro nights, the 1975's i'm in love with you, sam smith's like i can, arctic monkeys' wanna be yours

author's note: FIRST HYUCK SMAUU! how we feeling 😏 i needed to get this idea out of my system! plus, i love this type of trope, and haechan just fits the nerdy role 😭 I HAD TO! but happy reading :D <3

comment if you wish to be tagged for the story's updates!

profiles: "ncu freaks" + jeno 🤔 | gal pals & two men

intro. #manifestationiskey 🩷

ep 1. but a FAILING?

ep 2. i guess i'm her tutor

ep 3. WHY IS HE ATTRACTIVE

ep 4. COUGH y/n bag him COUGH

ep 5. i know i can treat youuu bettterr

ep 6. YNHYUCK PLOT IS FINALLY SAILING!

ep 7. bro texts with his 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴𝔂 𝓪𝓵𝓹𝓱𝓪 mode on 🐺👅

ep 8. bro fumbled HARD 🤦‍♂️

ep 9. LET THE BOY LIVE!! HES IN LOVE!!

ep 10. THE HARD LAUNCH GOES CRAZY

ep 11. lemme guess, fake boyfriend responsibilities? (written)

ep 12. jeno got me up... plotting

ep 13. AMAZING fake boyfriend

ep 14.

ep 15.

ep 16.

ep 17.

ep 18.

more to come. . .!

started: 09/06/24 finished:

© JIRSUNGS. ANY TRANSLATIONS/REPOSTS/PUBLISHES OF MY WORKS ON ANY PLATFORM ARE STRICTLY PROHIBITED! ALL COMMENTS, REBLOGS, LIKES, & FEEDBACK ARE GREATLY APPRECIATED! THANK YOU SO MUCH! I LOVE YOU, MWA! <3

[ladykailitha]

Royal Pain Part 14

Hello! Sorry this is a couple days late. I was really struggling with Eddie's reveal in the last part of this chapter and I wrote three different versions of it before I liked it well enough to be considered done.

And then WIP Wednesday was a smashing success and it kept me busy almost all night. I had so much fun. You're always welcome to join me and send me asks.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13

So without further ado...

***

That night when Steve closed up his shop with Robin, Steve looked down at the necklace that had been around his neck all day.

“Robin?” he whispered.

She froze and turned to him slowly. He never called her that unless it was serious. It was always Robs or Robbie, never Robin. As she face him, she spotted the necklace dangling from his neck as he rubbed his fingers over the warm surface.

She walked over to Steve and carefully took it from his grasp. “Is that a guitar pick?” she asked gently.

Steve nodded. “It’s his lucky guitar pick, it was the first pick his uncle ever bought for him when he was learning how to play.”

Robin looked him in the eyes. “You want to know what it means that he gave it to you, don’t you?”

Steve gulped and looked away. “I thought I was reading too much into his feelings for me when he made the joke about Chrissy, but now I’m not so sure. The only thing he took from what you told him was my coffee order. The flowers, the necklace, the bagels...that was all him.”

Robin let the necklace drop and wrapped her arms around him. “Look, I know it’s tempting to jump feet first into this. But you can’t. Get to know him. Take it slow. You don’t know what kind of hell he’s been through in the intervening years.”

Steve let out shuddering sigh. “It’s so hard. I’m really struggling with this. It’s like I don’t know how to make friends anymore.”

She smacked him upside the head.

“Ow!” he cried. “What the hell was that for?”

“You made friends with Argyle and Chrissy,” Robin reminded him. “Not to mention Miranda and the other band members. You can make friends just fine. You’re sweet and personable. And clearly he at least wants to be friends with you.” She tugged on the necklace.

Steve looked down at the necklace and let out a slow breath. “Yeah.”

She poked his forehead. “You are letting your intrusive thoughts get a better of you. You’re in love with him, that much is clear. But if you love him, you’ll go at his speed. Capeesh?”

Steve lift his head and tried to steady his jaw as it shook, trying to cry.

“I’m so scared,” he whispered.

She kissed his cheek. “I know, Stevie. But you’ll figure it out. You’re smarter then people give you credit for.”

He hugged her tight. She hugged back just a fiercely. “Now, come on,” she said with a hint of a sniffle. “I would love to sleep in my own bed tonight.”

Steve snorted. “I think it’s clear when I’m not tattooing him, I can’t be left alone with him.”

Robin sighed. “Right, next time he comes over I won’t spend the night at Erica’s. If nothing else to make sure you go to bed on time.”

Steve grinned. “You’re my best friend.”

“Yeah, yeah...”

*

Eddie got home to from the shop, glad that Steve had forgiven him. He touched the spot where the necklace used to be. He didn’t regret giving it to Steve. He wanted to add roses to the apology bouquet but he was terrified of sending the wrong message. Pink meant friendship, white purity, red romantic love. And if he was honest Steve was all of those things to him, but hella confusing in a bouquet. So he just didn’t.

Steve was surprised he remembered the everything bagel he would bring to class when they shared English together Eddie’s second go at graduating. But how could Eddie forget? The teacher hated it because it had a strong scent to it. Most of the class didn’t care so the bitter old hag couldn’t call him on it. It was glorious.

Eddie cherished any memory of the teachers having as rough a go at it as he was experiencing. No matter who was causing the grief. So yeah. That might have been the first time he realized he was head over heels with Steve Harrington resident queen bitch.

He loved that Steve had leaned into the whole royalty thing for his tattoo shop. It was funny in a way most shops weren’t.

Before he could get too deep into his thoughts, there was a knock on his door. He got up to answer it and there were Jeff and Mandy.

“Hey, guys,” Eddie greeted. “Come on in. Pizza’s on it’s way.”

“Score!” Mandy crowed. “Let’s see it!”

Eddie turned around for them to look at it through the cellophane wrap. “It’s not ready to come out yet, but I figure it would be ready for the lotion by the time we finish dinner.”

Mandy’s blunt nails dragged along the outside of where Steve had worked on today. “Jesus Christ, Eddie I’d marry him for his art work. That’s so fucking incredible.”

Eddie nodded. “Add to the fact that he’s the right balance of bitchy and sweet, hot as fuck and might totally be into me? Yeah, if I don’t ask him to marry me by this time next year, you have my permission to beat the sense back into me.”

“So the apology went well?” Jeff asked.

He pursed his lips and nodded, rocking back on his heels. “I made a fool of myself in front of the entire shop, too. For extra ‘apology’ points.”

Jeff tapped Eddie’s sternum. “Gave the man your lucky pick? Does he know what that means?”

“Does he know that it’s the most important object I own?” Eddie asked. “Yes. Does he know that it means I’m head over heels in love with him?” He raised his hand and waved it back it forth. “Ehhh...maybe?”

Mandy chuckled. “You are such an idiot, but that’s why we love you.”

The doorbell rang and Jeff went to go get it. He handed the guy a a ten dollar bill as a tip and closed the door.

Eddie pulled out a dinning table chair and flipped it around so that his back wasn’t pressed against anything as he ate.

He picked up a slice of pizza and began telling them about poor Steve’s horrible morning.

“I get that she like, lied,” Mandy said, “but it doesn’t change the fact that he was dating her because he thought she was eighteen.”

Eddie nodded. “Robin said she got a call back from the police, not only is Steve’s mom not paying for his bail or lawyer, but she served him with divorce papers, too.”

Jeff’s eyes went wide. “Dude fucked around and found out, man.”

Eddie smiled. “I never got why men would cheat on beautiful, successful women. Like what are you getting out of the side piece that you couldn’t get from your actual wife?”

“The thrill of cheating on a beautiful woman,” Mandy said. “It’s stupid, but some men just can’t go beyond their lizard brain.”

“I’m just sorry Stevie had to see that,” Eddie murmured. “He didn’t deserve to have his father come to his place of business and make an absolute ass of himself in front of his employees.”

Mandy nodded. “But you got to come to his rescue and trust me that will win you a shit ton of brownie points with the man.”

“And his friends and employees, too,” Jeff added around a bite of pizza. “Robin was already rooting for you two since day one, so use that. Let her help you get your man. Because it sounds like she’s more than willing. Especially after this morning.”

Eddie wavered.

Mandy put her elbows on her knees and leaned forwards. “Eddie, my love. You know I adore you. But you can’t keep expecting the next guy to come along is going to treat you the way Seth did.”

Eddie didn’t have a lot of exes but Seth was the worst and unfortunately the last. He was everything Eddie thought he wanted in a partner. Long blond hair, tattoos, piercings, long legs in tight leather. He was charming and funny. He started off a little clingy, and ended up full on possessive. He became jealous of the band. Of Mandy, even though Seth knew Eddie was gay.

Eddie cleared his throat and rubbed his bottom lip thoughtfully.

“I know.” He grabbed the back of the chair and yanked his arm straight, throwing himself back as far as he could without falling off the damn chair. “The man was a serial monogamist, and from what I remember back in school, all the girls would talk about what a romantic he was, how sweet and gentle he was with them.”

Jeff nodded, picking up the pizza boxes to throw them away. “He was too much of a romantic, the poor bastard,” he told Mandy. “Flowers because he thought his girlfriend would like them. Tell them that an hour was too long between meetings. Kiss them tenderly in the halls.”

“Which is great if you like that sort of thing,” Mandy concluded, “not so much if you don’t.”

Jeff and Eddie nodded.

“So even though it feels like you’re comparing apples to apples,” Jeff said to Eddie, “you’re comparing a rabbit to a hare. They might look the similar on the surface, but they are not even close to being the same.”

Eddie sighed again and tilted his head back. “Is Seth the hare in this scenario?”

Mandy laughed. “Yes, monster hell beast, Seth verses cute little bunny, Steve.”

Eddie huffed out a chuckle. Jeff tried to stifle his laugh, but he caught Eddie’s eye and they both burst out laughing. Soon they were all laughing about the image.

Mandy and Jeff came over and hugged him.

“Talk to Steve,” Jeff suggested. “Tell him what happened and how wounded Seth left you. I’m sure he’d understand.”

Eddie nodded. “Yeah. I’m seeing him on Thursday for day three of this bad boy,” he jerked a thumb at his back, “I’ll talk to him about it then.”

“Good,” Mandy said, rubbing her hands together. “Now, let’s make sure Stevie's artwork is protected.”

Eddie laughed and let them help him take care of his latest ink.

***

Part 15 Part 16 Part 17 Part 18 Part 19 Part 20 Part 21 Part 22 Part 23 Part 24 Part 25 Part 26 Part 27 Part 28 Epilogue

Tag List: @spectrum-spectre @estrellami-1 @zerokrox-blog @artiststarme @swimmingbirdrunningrock @gregre369 @pyrohonk ​ @renaissan-vvitch @goodolefashionedloverboi @chaoticlovingdreamer @maya-custodios-dionach @messrs-weasley @val-from-lawrence @plyerice27 @thedragonsaunt @chaoticlovingdreamer @sapphirecobalt-1 @a-little-unsteddie @i-must-potato @danili666 @carlyv @rozzieroos @wonderland-girl143-blog @itsall-taken @justforthedead89 @emly03 @bookworm0690 @aizawa-emma @redfreckledwolf @thesuninyaface @bookbinderbitch @yikes-a-bee @littlewildflowerkitten @scheodingers-muppet @archermightbegay @hallucinatedjosten @ellietheasexylibrarian @anne-bennett-cosplayer @cinnamon-mushroomabomination @bestwifehaver @xxfiction-is-my-realityxx

[satancopilotsmytardis]

What about Shigadabi stuck in America? (I have no idea why I think this is funny but I feel like Dabi would be hella confused while Shigaraki speaks English. Like Dabi would think that Shigaraki speaking English, which he doesn’t understand, is a personal attack on him)….as you can tell my one brain cell is working extremely hard-

They go to America for? Crimes? Dabi has to wear a full face-covering mask so that no one immediately recognizes him, and sort of just stands around like a grunt while Shigaraki actually does the business part of their work.

they get what they needed to and Dabi is being a little bitchier than usual because he feels completely useless in this situation because he can't read signs, he can't speak, and he can't help with the actual work at all unless Shig is holding his hand and walking him through it.

Shigaraki puts up with this until they're in private and then asks him what his fucking deal is, and after some prodding, he finds out Dabi's insecurities aren't just from not knowing the language, but also because he still struggles with the fact that he stopped getting an education at 12. He's tried really hard to read and educate himself however he can whenever he can, but he still finds himself dealing with big gaps in his knowledge that kind of make him feel like shit when they come up.

They leave America and go back to Japan and Dabi thinks that will be the end of it, but a couple of days later he realizes someone broke into his room and downloaded a new program onto his e-reader. Shigaraki found an online course for people who left school at any age, and that allows them to test for their learning level and start to take classes again privately on their own, with tutors available (though asynchronous and remote so they can't identify their students). He also recognized that Dabi isn't the only villain who had that experience, and he figured out a way to make that tech available to the entire PLF. I mean, Re-Destro talked down to Shig and treated him like shit when he jut thought that Shigaraki hadn't received any formal education, it must be worse for people who didn't get the tutoring his teacher gave him. And hell, Twice had to drop out of middle school when he was orphaned, and Toga should be in high school right now. There are other people who need help too.

Dabi is sharply touched by this and starts to put as much work into his studying as he does their actual work, and he starts to learn English, going to Shig for tutoring when he needs it. They are doing pretty well in a few months when they have to go back to America again to check in on their business ventures there, and while they're there, Dabi is doing a lot better. Though he does have a question for Duster-- and he asks what "I love you" sounds like in English. Shig tells him, and Dabi repeats it and waits. And waits. And then in Japanese just gives up and tells Tomura that he's dense as a fucking brick and kisses him.

[tired-old-men]

Dude where was this blog when I was 12? I was obsessed with the Brotherhood so much I had the whole family tree memorized. I would info dump at the drop of a hat. I would be so feral about these sad old men and no one- not my family, my friends, or even my dogs- understood what the FUCK I was even talking about so eventually I just shut up and stopped thinking about it. And then my dash is full of Knuckles and now I’m like *gasp* “THE SAD OLD MAN CLUB!” and then you are just here??? Talking about this thing that I literally thought no one except me cared about??? Hello??? Shall we have a spring wedding???

MY BROTHER IN ECHIDNA I FEEL YOU ON A METAPHYSICAL LEVEL!!! I have never connected so hard to an ask in my life. I was hella obsessed with these guys in my teens! I knew their family tree by heart, knew their lore inside and out, I doodled Edmund and Dimitri in my science notes in class constantly, shit these guys lived rent free in my brain with how much I daydreamed about them! I might have had like 3 people tops on deviantart at the time that I could even talk to about these guys, who actually knew who they were and even made art and content for them.

Then came a period of time I ended up leaving the sonic fandom entirely, probably a mixture of being made to feel discouraged in liking my interest from my offline peers and family (back when liking Sonic din't made you a cool kid but a target) as well as getting hyperfixated on other things I just... moved on sadly. It wasn't until last year I want to say, that I stumbled upon @julie-su's art and realized that it was made in recent year, that I got genuinely excited for these guys and the sonic fandom again. You can also imagine my subsequent heartbreak when I found out about the Ken Penders lawsuit and how all of these beloved characters ended up... But as the saying goes if you want something done right you gotta do it yourself! Got sad that there's no more art of these dudes time to make some! It's how I ended up coming back to tumblr and getting to meet more echidna loving individuals and honestly I wouldn't go back not one bit. I'm sad that I feel like I missed out on the Archie comic fandom era back when the comics were still publishing, but I'm glad to be making up some lost time by indulging in the grandpa gang with my online buds. I can't imagine my life without these sad old dudes living rent free in my mind, they keep me entertained, they make me laugh, and bring me much comfort. It makes me so happy to see fans of these guys and new content being made for them just get me so fucking excited and happy.

Most of the time making content for them seems like I am screaming into a void considering how obscure they can be. But in the end, I don't I think I have had more fun creating art and writing than when I started drawing them again. In a way I keep them alive in my memories through my works and that makes me happy. I know the few that know and love these characters also love to see them still around, and have been big inspirations for me to create my own stories and headcanons for these characters and I will forever be grateful for them enriching my life with their creativity. Always a delight to meet someone that loves these tired old men as much as me, your comment literally made my day! Thank you for being awesome and for even liking my works, It really means a lot to know theres still love out there for these characters. I'm always happy to chat with a fellow guardian fan so please don't be a stranger! Besides, we have to frolic down the hills of Angel Island in the eve of our honeymoon~

[andhetoldmeiwasholy]

Marina Prompts-

1. Carina has enough from dating and applies to be part of a TV show, where they find your ‘perfect’ match based on science and the participants see their match the first time in front of the altar. Carina meets Maya on their wedding day and both go through with the ceremony, but now without cameras there, they have to find out if this was the perfect match or should they get a divorce

2. Being a single parent and not getting out of the house enough is not easy, but maya loves their kid and if they have to put their dating life on hold, so be it. But when Carina moves into the apartment next door, it’s the kids that see an opportunity to make their parents happy

3.Carina moves into a new apartment and wants to check out the closest dog park. Their dog (Jeff) loves it there, especially that one dog (ford) that seems to be there almost every time they go. With their dogs being madly in love with each other, Maya and Carina are forced to spend more time together as well

4.Carina getting hella jealous when she sees Maya out and about with their (not) date and end up following them around. Maya catches them and is like, “Why are you following me?” And Carina’s like, “To tell your date how much of a dick you are so they can avoid dating someone like you.” (or, alternatively: Maya cornering Carina about it, and Maya being like, “But why do you care?” and Carina saying, “I don’t.” And then they somehow end up fucking them in a random alleyway or at a back of a bar or something. You can fill in the details on how they get to that point.)

One shots-

5. Maya starts her period on shift, has to message/call Carina in a panic hoping they don’t get called out. Doesn’t wanna ask Beckett to leave.

6. Maya spilling coffee/soup all over themselves by accident and starts panicking, so (insert character) helps them take off/clean their clothes right when Carina walks in

7. “C’mere… Want snuggles.” (Featuring grabby hands!!!)

8. Maya bleeds through while asleep, wakes up embarrassed (or Carina wakes her up)

9. “Stop sticking your feet down my pants!” “It’s not my fault your asscheeks are hella warm.”

10. “I wanna be big spoon this time.” “But you’re tiny.”

Sentence smut starters prompts-

11. Maya/Carina strap au “all i can think of is sitting on top of your hard cock

12. Maya/Carina AU- Maya is a porn director who owns her own company, Carina is just starting out in the business to further her study. They cross paths.

13. “God you’re such a dick” “Yeah and you are about to take it like a good girl.”

14. “You’re the sweetest thing I have ever tasted.”

15. Maya/Carina fight turns smutty “Go fuck yourself.” Cocky Maya “Only if you watch me~”

16. “What are we doing right now?” “Fucking. What else?” “…It feels more than just fucking.”

17. “Show me how you do it when you touch yourself.”

18. Mile high club- Carina books them first class seats, she’s gotta learn how to be quiet. “You have to be quiet if you want to cum, bambina”

19. “If I have to pull over, you’ll be walking funny for the next week.”

20. ‘Innocent’ movie night “You don’t realize what it does to me when we’re cuddling and you press your ass against me.”

21. “What the fuck?  Do that again.  I liked it.”

22. “How are you so oblivious?  I’m trying to tell you I’m fucking horny!”

23. “You know it’s fine if you’re a little rough with me, right?” “But I don’t want to hurt you…” “It’s fine, I can take it. I want it rough. Please?” 

24. “Wake up!” “What? What happened?” “Why did you just moan in your sleep?” “…What, were you turned on by it?” “What?! No, of course not! Umm….Disturbed, but definitely not turned on.” 

25. “Where should I sit?” / “The couch works just fine, but if you prefer comfort, my face works far better my darling.”

26. Maya-“Your wife isn’t very pleased with the outfit you chose to wear tonight, you made those fools think they stood a chance.” / Carina-“Maybe they did.” / Maya-*incredulous laughter* “Is that right baby? I go on a work trip for a few days and you just forget who you belong to? Don’t worry sweetheart, I’ll remind you.”

27. “Kiss me, please.” / “Is that all you want baby, is for me to kiss you?” / “N-no, I also want you to fuck me senseless, but a kiss sounded far more romantic.”

28. “Fuck, you’re doing so great for me, sweetheart,” Carina praises, hands gripping onto the sides of Maya’s hips as she rub herself against her wife’s thigh in a quickening pace; smiling a little when Maya whimpers at the praise. 

Please let me know if you write any!!

Please lemme know if you write any 🙏🏻

[akwardlyuncool]

Class Favorites: Concert (Ranked-ish)

Before I get into the lose ranking of these concerts, since physical tickets are often times being replaced with our phones (rude) I started making my own faux tickets as my own personal takeaway, as well as using it for another creative outlet. The first time I did it, I printed off too many cause I couldn't decide which version I wanted or how many I "needed" so I brought the extras to the show with me and handed a few out to fellow concert goers. Since then it's almost been like a random act of kindness type of gift that seems to bring other people joy, but it's also something I can put on my wall or my notebook and I think I want to make them forever.

The first one I made was for when I saw Yellowcard cause I was just so excited about the tour announcement, however the first one's I was actually able to bring to a show was for Watsky. Anyway they're all my babies and I love them so much.

PS: I only give them out after the show is over, cause I'm so scared of anyone trying to actually use one of these things to get into a show. I also reserve these for the community and not really the artist, however I did make personal ones for Watsky to give to him.

___________________________________________________________________

Note: All these shows were fantastic and such good times, so this won't a hard rank, but more of a soft one instead. I also haven't done any official concert reviews since like 2022 (SHAME ON ME) but I do plan to get those posted this year, because this blog feels incomplete without them, so this is just a taste of that.

The Speaking Our Language Tour - Boys Like Girls

ft: The Summer Set, State Champs and LOLO.

I bought this ticket so last minute cause I didn't know if I wanted to go to any show at the time. That being said, do you see that lineup?! There was no way I could let myself pass that up. This thing was so stacked and such a ridiculously fun time. State Champs called us the best crowd of the whole tour. My 30+ year old body wanted to die when Martin from Boys Like Girls said they were playing 50 songs, but I made it through and however sore and tired I felt afterwards was hella worth it! I think BLG in December will have to be how I see them from now until forever.

Disclaimer: They didn't actually play 50 full songs, it was more like lets mix some covers in with bits and pieces of their original work. So that's how I made it through.

Yellowcard Celebrating 20 Years of Ocean Avenue - Yellowcard

ft. Amberlin, This Wild Life, Mayday Parade and Emo Night Brooklyn

The moment I saw this show was announced I knew where all my money was going. I'm pretty sure I did pre-sale the day they let me. If you know me or have been following this blow for a while now, Ocean Avenue is one of my top 10 favorite albums of all time and one of the first albums that I knew to be a front to back piece of work. Essentially what I'm saying is that there was no way, I wasn't going to this show. I forced myself to feel good enough to be first in line lol. I think the only reason why this show gets second place is because Yellowcard skipped a couple songs (hella rude) so it wasn't technically a full album show. The show was still amazing, it just when you cut a few tracks out, I'm gonna be a little butt hurt.

Watsky Intention Tour - Watsky

ft. Feed The Biirds and Wax

This was another show that I don't think I waited around to buy tickets for. Covid rescheduled and rescheduled and eventually canceled the last set of Watsky tickets that I held, so this was a little bit of a comeback tour for him. Somberly it was also potentially Watsky's last full cross-country/international tour as a musician and although I was gonna go regardless, that made it even more important to me. I was sad that I was seeing him for what could be the last time without my best friend, who I'd seen Watsky with the majority of the time in like the last 12 years, so I've kinda avoided reminiscing about it. (Which is probably why it's at 3.) I will say though, that it was for sure a really GOOD show. Feed The Biirds gets me every time and Wax is just continuously stepping his game up. Watsky said if this is it, then we gone do up right and across the board, he did not disappoint. The whole set was built to cover every album and give fans of any stage something to take home with them.

He also livestreamed the Metro date for free so people who couldn't make a date in person got to still experience the show or so other's could re-watch and re-live the experience from their couches. So technically I got to see the show twice, live and from my couch. I just love how accessible he wants to make his art.

The intention tour ended up not being the last time I would see Watsky in person, George did a small Art Show Pop Up/Meet & Greet tour at the end of the year. There I got to thank him again and do the whole send off thing in person which was really nice. I even made special, more personal faux tickets for the occasion to give to him, so that was cool.

.

.

On the side: I didn't make tickets for them, but I did go to a couple metal shows at a brewery, which I think is hella tight. I mainly watched my friend's band (Goat Hill Massacre) play and ate pizza called The Mortician. I watched other bands too of course and they were also fun, but again I was there mainly for my friend's band. Anyway I wanted to still shout them out cause they were technically shows that I went to this year, had fun at and felt pretty cool while attending. I just need to do the ear plug thing the next time I see them cause I need to save my ears, but also because metal ain't no joke lol.

Go check out their work! Goat Hill Massacre's Spotify

[yakultii]

idk what happened to the chain but imma do this v belated anyway bc i love talking ab my boring self also @yakultstan was tagged but imma do it here lol

1. Are you named after anyone? my first name.. nope..my dad named me and I hate my name. It doesn’t suit me at all.. my middle name however is named cause it’s the same as my mum’s middle name and every other white bitch in the country.. it’s also the same name as my dad’s biological mother who we don’t speak of and they made it very clear that I was not named after her LOL.

2. When was the last time you cried?maybe a week or two ago.. my emotions are hella unregulated so I randomly cry watching A Norris Nuts YouTube video but can’t ever cry over personal trauma or wanting to die.. I think it would be healthy for me to cry every day if I could and would save me a lot of trouble caused by terrible coping mechanisms.

3. Do you have kids? Nope. Kinda scary to think my mum had 3 kids by my current age… and look how they each turned out(not good).. I think it would be morally irresponsible for me to have kids who share my DNA at this point but if I make it to my future.. who knows what path I go down.

4. What sports do you/have you played?: mostly athletics as a kid (sprinting and long jump at competitive level) and as I got older different distances in running (did my first half marathon when I was 15) but honestly now just surviving feels like an elite sport :,)

5. Do you use sarcasm? All the time especially a lot more when I was younger though cause in recent years I’ve kinda stopped as I keep offending people.. only due to the fact that when I am being sarcastic I sound serious and when I am being serious I sound sarcastic rip. Nah I’m sure I still use it a lot.

6. What’s the first thing you notice about somebody? Usually either their outfit if it slays so hard or their facial structure/facial expression

7. Eye colour? Controversial (apparently) but my eye colour genuinely changes dramatically in the light. Sometimes people tell me my eye are bright blue, sometimes people tell me they are green, sometimes they tell me they are a mix of both and quite often people tell me they are grey !!!! I’ve also had someone think they were hazel which is kinda wild and a one off but that person hadn’t seen me irl.

8. Scary movies or happy endings? Happy endings. I’m kinda boring but real life gives me enough anxiety I’m not going to willingly put myself through more.

9. Any talents? Literally none. well maybe my ability to pull off top marks on all my academic essays having written them all the night before but I’m not proud of it. Nothing too exceptional though.. I can juggle? No I’m actually really talented at still being alive when so many past circumstances should have resulted in death!

10. Where were you born? A small country town in the state of Victoria, Australia.

11. Hobbies? bed rotting for all but approx 2 hrs everyday(not proud of it), writing shit amateur poetry on @yakultstan going for walks in nature sometimes, eating food, studying? planning trips and travelling but not so much recently. idk I’m barely a person these days :,)

12. Any pets? Yesss my Yellow Labrador named Flume and my black cat named Angel (she’s literally like 16yrs old and still acts like a bby) but sadly they live at my family home 4hrs away from where I live :( we also have many other pets like chickens, goats, more dogs, more cats etc that aren’t mine. Sadly none where I currently live in the city other than the growing mould in my apartment :)

13. Height? 160cm/5’3ish (shorter than everyone expects)

14. Favourite subject? It was English by far in school and we also had a social justice class I loved back in the day but in university sociology for sure and a little bit of philosophy

15. Dream job? I don’t dream of working. in saying that if I was in good health there are a million things younger me dreamed of doing..teacher, journalist, social worker, outdoor education leader, international aid worker,author - the list goes on forever but I won’t continue or I’ll make myself sad.

Tagging ppl but only do if u want ofc <3

@hela-fortia @sfsolstice @manicmoonbug @user-terminal

(get to know me tag)

lets goooo

1. Are you named after anyone? Funnily enough, on my father's side, we had this tradition where all our initials are identical. But no, I wasn't named after anyone in particular.

2. When was the last time you cried? It's been a while tbh. Think it was a month or two back? Life be hittin sometimes.

3. Do you have kids? No I don't and I never really planned on it.

4. What sports do you/have you played? I used to stay after school and play basketball with my friends but I was so bad. I did do Muay Thai as well but only for a short while and I'd love to get back into that.

5. Do you use sarcasm? Oh most definitely. Love sarcasm.

6. What's the first thing you notice about somebody? Energy, energy, energy.

7. Eye color? A very dark brown.

8. Scary movies or happy endings? Happy endings for sure. I really like neutral endings too.

9. Any talents? I'd say my creativity. I pour a lot out and love to express myself through EVERYTHING. Safe to say I'm kind of a perfectionist because of it.

10. Where were you born? Good ol' Virginia, USA.

11. Hobbies? Words, music, art, that kind of thing. There's a guy on youtube named ghowste who makes the best beats to freestyle to.

12. Any pets? Not anymore. Never had my own pet, just pets that were always passed down to me because their owner didn't want them anymore.

13. Height? I'm 5'7ish.

14. Favorite subject? English. Psychology was fun too.

15. Dream job? Honestly this changes for me a lot. I really wanted to be a Banquet Chef at the Smithsonian in DC but I gave up my cooking career. I did make it to the Fine Arts Museum here in Virginia before I quit which was amazing. If I had to pick a new one though it'd probably have something to do with communication and therapy. I'm bad as hell at communicating but I've been told I give great advice.

Thank you for tagging me @ivaspinoza. It was fun :)

I don't know many tumblr folks so I'm just tagging a few accounts I saw in my notifs, no pressure ofc

@toxifoxx @fuuuckimhi @skimbradsteen @zelphafrost @yakultstan @babalobobo @real-dooozy

[namtanlovesfilm]

bestie I'm gonna need the essay on not me's wardrobe!!

ask & you shall receive! so I feel like GOOD costume design is actually pretty rare in thai dramas, bc for me I find it good if it goes beyond just "cute clothes" and actually tells us things about the characters & adds to the story. and in my opinion not me clothing choices do that perfectly. buckle up for yet another long essay from me lol <3

why not me's costume design is subtly great

so firstly, let's start by the general wardrobe before doing an analysis by character. we can see the color scheme of the show reflected in the wardrobe choices, straying away from "cutesy colors" like pinks, yellows & purples for the most part to go towards muted blues, reds, greens as well as blacks, whites & greys. of course that doesn't mean other colors aren't used, for example yellow that is found in black's wardrobe, but the color scheme stays cold & muted most of the time. all of the clothes for the gang members are very much masculine & casual, which fits their roles on the show. you obviously don't see any brand name items & the clothes are often used multiple times in different episodes. this creates a cohesive unity between all the characters, even though as we're gonna see they each have their particular style.

sean

so let's start with the one who inspired me to look at not me's wardrobe choices a bit closer, not because I think sean has the best clothes, but in fact bc I think he has the worst lmao. they really managed to make the thai fashion king off jumpol himself look unfashionable, and frankly that's just freaking genius. sean has almost always the same outfit: skinny jeans or pants, the same athletic sneakers, a basic long t-shirt, and his trusty khaki jacket, that can be replaced occasionally by a jean one or a more vibrant green in ep 12. and I do really love that stylistic choice, bc for me it definitely showcases sean's social background: the guy relies solely on himself to survive, and he's working at the garage while studying. his life is obviously very hard, and he doesn't have money to spare on a second pair of shoes or jeans. therefore he reuses the same clothes very often, even more than the other guys. and that shit?? is very well thought-out. also the fact that sean’s color is definitely green when it’s been my favorite color since I was a child... makes my heart happy <3

black

then we have the BEST wardrobe aesthetically by far, and funnily enough that's black. who thought that the most nonchalant & uncaring guy would actually care for fashion lmao?? I actually love that. so black really takes the biker aesthetic to a whole other level, often layering clothes & playing with different silhouettes. I love the look of his sleeveless jackets, they're so fun to build an outfit around & also coincidentally remind me of third's sleeveless jackets in theory of love for some reason which... of course I love a good random parallel lol. my favorites are his homemade jackets that he (or yok?) painted on that both white & him wear, once again reusing the same piece of clothing multiple times & thank goodness they did bc these jackets are HELLA COOL! for me black having the best wardrobe is no coincidence considering he comes from the richest background from all the guys in the gang, and I really like the dichotomy between his aloof personality & his crazy cool wardrobe.

yok

now, yok's wardrobe is extremely simple, consisting of baggy pants and mostly itty bitty tank tops, but I fucking love it as well. firstly yok's silhouettes in these clothes is just so cool, he looks like an anime character & it just works so well for his reckless & fun personality. but also I like to think the itty bitty tank tops are a testament to his himbo-ness & once again, I just love that for him. those tank tops ("wife beaters"......... goes to barf in a corner at the fucked up name), very stereotypical of a lower class type of masculinity, truly get a twist with the character of yok & I love every minute of it.

eugene

eugene's wardrobe immediately caught my attention since her first appearance on the show, bc it changes SO MUCH from the usual clothes that female characters in thai dramas are put into. we see her stomach, how scandalous lol! eugene has a style that fits very much her field of studies, dancing. she mostly wears crop tops and sweat pants & just looks really good in every outfit. she also has her contemporary dance outfit for repetitions that consist of a beige tank top & biker shorts. and I just love that her outfits show more skin than what is usually "allowed" for female characters in thai dramas, without even pointing it out. idk, I just fucking love eugene's wardrobe, she just looks so cool.

gram

as I said earlier, every member of the gang has a very cohesive style with the others, but each one has its own personal style on top of it. for gram, what characterizes him is truly graphic tees. he either wears them layered over a long-sleeved shirt or by themselves, and they really make him stand out in my opinion. if I wear to guess why they were chosen for him, it would be to match gram's very loud opinions on law & politics. he's a very passionate & educated character, and his best scenes in my opinion are the ones where he's arguing his point. bold graphics really match that side of his personality in my opinion, and I love it for him.

namo

namo also has a super cool style, bc it is a bit more masculine than what we, once again, find on most female characters in thai dramas. as a graffiti artist, she needs comfortable fits she can paint in all day, but her style is definitely not compromised by that. namo prefers loser shapes as well as shorter clothes like shorts and shirt dresses over pants. and she just... looks cool & I love that she's not afraid to look a bit more masculine with her fashion.

white

so obviously, since we've spent most of the show with white pretending to be black, we haven't seen a lot of his fashion. but it's also fucking great, ESPECIALLY in terms of colors. before joining the gang, white was pretty proper on himself, wearing mostly light-colored shirts, especially during his exams and interviews. what I love though, is the switch of how he dresses after black comes back, but his entire ideology has changed: he starts wearing jackets, sneakers and more casual clothes... that are still of a lighter color. that makes him immediately stand out, not only from his brother so we can tell them apart, but from the entire gang. and it shows that his entire style wasn't washed away just bc he's a vigilente now. I just really fucking love that choice to still have him stand out as the newcomer & maintaining his personal style while still subtly changing. when I say the costum design is good, I really mean it.

to conclude, I won’t analyze every character’s wardrobe like dan, gumpa, todd or nuch bc they’re not the most interesting & we’ve already gotten the point, so that was it for my analysis of not me’s great costume design! hope you enjoyed <3

xxx

[avinaccia]

A Completely Objective and Logical Ranking of Every Hetalia Character Song

New character songs are dropping,  I have too much time on my hands, let’s go. 

Also here’s a Youtube playlist for the ~✨nostalgia✨~

Bring it on in the tags 

71. Ah Legendary Class⭐The Awesome Me Highway [Prussia]: Absolutely tearing it up on the drums and on the vocal cords alike (I pray for Atsushi Kousaka). Great for the memes. 

70.  Happy Thoughts Museum [???]: This is listed as an official song but I had literally never heard of the title. Then I listened to it and BAM! Smack back to 2013 watching the teasers for the show on Funimation. Not sure I’d count it as a character song though...

69. (Nice)  My Song that is written by me for me [Prussia]: Deafened me but I can appreciate the industrial grind.

68.  My House is...Quiet. ~With the Trolls~ [Norway]: I have never heard this song, nor can I find any version of it online. By default it goes here and I am so sorry Norge.

67.  Make a Wish to Santa♪ [Sealand]: The discordant notes and childish exuberance only serve to make this sound like a demonic plea to Santa to eliminate the singer’s enemies.

66.  Heaven and Hell on Earth [Rome]: Rome sounds like he’s been in the corner of a restroom. Extra points for the metal version, minus points for the fact that the beach scene was replayed like 1764 times.

65. Canada Complete Introduction [Canada]: Quiet af until Kumacheerio shows up and blows out your speakers. they did you dirty my darling 😔

64.  It’s Easy!!! [America]: I don't think any video of this has ever stayed up for more than 20 seconds. Sounds cool, but like I was listening to 20 different genres at once, someone make him calm down.

63.  Bù Zàiyì the Small Stuff ☆ [China]: I cannot for the life of me find the complete song anywhere, clips have a cool beat though

62.  Let's Boil Hot Water♪ [Italy]: Exactly what it says on the tin..though a bit too close to elevator music for my tastes.

61.  The Fragrance of Early Summer [Japan]: Very ‘from the books’ Japan-esque song

60.  Peace Sounds Nice…[Baltic Trio]: All well and good until the radio demon shows up

59.  W●D●C ~World Dancing~ [America]: How a song can sound like it’s from 4 different decades at once is beyond me

58.  Overflowing Passion [BFT]: This is just drunken karaoke and I have 0 clue what’s going on #iconicforallthewrongreasons

57. Ren●Ren●Renaissance♪ [Rome+Chibitalia]: Wholesome Grandpa with Grandson content - barring the fact that Italy sounds on the verge of a nervous breakdown and Rome has had too much wine.

56.  Roma Antiqua [Rome]: Similar energy to any one of China’s songs - there’s a part of the song where it sounds like he’s singing in the shower, and I will never not laugh at [CENSORED]

55.  Country From Where the Sun Rises, Zipangu [Japan]: Very chill, very Japan, but just meh for me.

54.  Moon Over Emei Shan [China]: Good message, okay song.

53.  My Friend [England]: What a mind palace you must have Mr. Kirkland

52.  With Love, from Iceland [Iceland]: Three words: Heavy. Metal. Puffin.

51.  Having Friends is Nice...♫ [Russia]: Russia is the cutest thing ever

50.  Mm. [Sweden]: Smooth transition from WWE Smackdown to shopping at IKEA.

49.  Why don’t you come over? ~Beyond the Northern Lights~ [Iceland]: I don’t want to be mean but...this does sound like the second closing theme to an anime whose first closing was much more popular (à la Soul Eater)

48. Gakuen☆Festa [Germany, Italy, Japan]: Sounds like a 60s song of the summer but oh dear their voices do not go together. Hella cute though.

47.  Wa! Wa!! World Ondo [Main Cast]: One time I travelled 10 hours in a coach bus with a bunch of teenagers to a city of note in my country, and the only souvenir I bought was the fucking PAINT IT WHITE DVD. Perfectly chaotic, UN ĐĕùX~~

46.  In the Bluebell Woods [England]: In the album cover for this song he’s holding a guitar but this is not a rock song. Still has ‘running through the hills’ levels of dramatism though.

45.  Poi Poi Poi♪ [Taiwan]: You’re telling me that Taiwan, someone whose has *ONE LINE* in Beautiful World (which is criminal tbh what kind of representation-) managed to get an eNTIRE CHARACTER SONG???????

44.  White Flame [Russia]: There’s something to be said for a song that is 3x the length of any Hetalia episode

43.  Ich liebe… [Germany]: Baking cakes for your friends has never been so wholesome.

42.  We Wish you a Merry Christmas [America, China, England, France, Russia]: Nice to see they’ve gotten their shit together since United Nations Sta-hmm.

41.  Ah, Worldwide à la mode [France]: Sounds like a Disney Princess song, hard not to picture France frolicking in a field of flowers.

40.  Che Bello! ~My House is the Greatest!⭐~ [Italy]: Would not be out of place in an advertisement for Sea World.

39.  May You Smile Today [Japan]: THE feel good song of the summer

38.  Let’s Look Behind the Rainbow [Italy]: I will protect you.

37.  I'm your HERO☆ [America]: “Anyone who’s sad or sullen will be arrested” did NOT age well.

36.  Mein Gott! [Prussia]: Alternating headphone effect at the beginning is cool, so is the confidence...the actual singing on the other hand...

35. Nihao⭐China [China]: Listen, all of China’s character songs are great, I just can’t vibe with this one like some of the others.

34.  Pechka ~Light My Heart~ [Russia]: I’m still having difficulty wrapping my head around the fact that this and Winter were released at the same time.

33.  Pukapuka⭐Vacation [Germany, Italy, Japan]: Seems just a bit too much like they’re running on a treadmill that’s picking up speed and trying to sing at the same time. Peppy.

32.  Santa Claus is Coming to Town [Germany, Italy, Japan]: This is unironically the best song sung by this trio; can only vibe with for two months out of the year though.

31.  Excuse Me, I Am Sorry [Japan]: Japan’s character traits speedrun. Gives me barbershop quartet vibes for some reason but is catchy as hell.

30.  The Story of Snow and Dreams [Russia]: A superhero anime opening in the making

29. England’s Evil Demon Summoning Song [England]: Sir that is not how you roast a marshmallow, don’t cut yourself on that edge.

28.  Moi Moi Sauna♪ [Finland]: Exactly the type of song you’d expect and it’s wonderful

27.  United Nations Star⭐ [America, China, England, France, Russia]: This isn’t as much of a song as it is a four minute struggle for everyone to sing without America yelling every 5 seconds...Like a particularly musical episode of Hetalia.

26.  Paris is Indeed Splendid [France]: Paris-pa-pa-pa-paris

25.  Absolutely Invincible British Gentleman [England]: Poppy, rocky, polka-dotty

24.  Vorwärts Marsch! [Germany]: To quote the comment section: “This sounds like a German version of I’ll Make a Man out of you.” There’s some truth to that.

23.  Hamburger Street [America]: The product of America’s rapper phase. 8/10 because he’s trying so hard and because I can unironically sing along to all of this.

22.  Hoi Sam☆Nice Guy [Hong Kong]: A song that would absolutely destroy the ankles of anyone in DDR.

21.  I Am German-Made [Germany]: There was once a version that had Germany and Prussia singing at the same time and it sounded positively demonic and Broadway could never

20.  La pasión no se detiene ~Unstoppable Passion~ [Spain]: Talented, brilliant, incredible, amazing, show-stopping...

19.  Fall in Love, Mademoiselle [France]: Sounds like it should be in Mozart Opera Rock, I have kiss kiss falled in love.

18. Embrace the Très Bien Moi [France]: This is the definition of SELF LOVE PEOPLE. 

17. Carrot and Stick [Belarus&Ukraine]: Absolutely DRIPPING in 2000s power ballad energy. The type of song that plays on repeat in the mind of the widow whose millionaire husband ‘mysteriously disappeared’ (and the only legit character song ever acknowledged by the anime)

16. C.B.C (Cowboyz Boot Camp) Vol. 1 [America]: AH MAH GAWWDDD

15. Winter [Russia]: Heavy metal fever dream and the perfect song for an angst-ridden teenager

14.  Seychelles Here ⭐ Vacation Island [Seychelles]: UN👏DER👏RA👏TED SONG👏OF 👏THE 👏SUM👏MER👏

13.  Nah, it will settle itself somehow [Romano]: One day I aspire to reach this level of chill

12.  Let’s Enjoy Today [England]: I will never not feel happy when listening to this.

11.  Einsamkeit [Germany]: Ludwig manages to air every single one of his worries about not being good enough compared to his friends and always being perceived as mean or uptight when he’s actually just a softie and now my heart hurts. 💔

10.  Aiyaa Four Thousand Years [China]: A very poignant and beautiful song about the passage of time and the inevitability of its passing; comparable to an ancient ballad complete with explosive crescendos and meaningful lyrics.

9.  Bon Bon Bon❤️C’est Bon C’est Bon! [France]: Peppy, cheerful, adorable, groundbreaking; has been my alarm tone for six years and I’ve yet to tire of it. 9/10 The moaning interspersed throughout has been an interesting wake-up call.

8.  Let’s Enjoy! Let’s Get Excited! Cheers! [Denmark]: This is on par with Everytime we Touch by Cascada in terms of rage potential unlocked (the good kind)

7.  Dream Journey [Japan]: Whoever’s playing the shakuhachi is absolutely KILLING IT. Dramatic, wonderful, great metaphors.

6.  Gourmet’s Heart Beginner Level [China]: Absolute banger, I’m a vegetarian but this would inspire me to eat shumai.

5.  Always with you...Nordic Five! [Nordic FIVVVVVEEEE]: Everyone harmonizes beautifully except for Denmark. Extremely catchy, number placement seemed appropriate. 

4.  Pub and GO! [England]: I love this trash man

3. Maji Kandou⭐Hong Kong Night [Hong Kong]: If you thought Denmark’s song was a banger JUST YOU WAIT. I WILL BLOW OUT MY SPEAKERS LISTENING TO LO-HA-SU.

2. Steady Rhythmus [Germany]: THIS SONG IS METAL AF. Seriously, if it can be classified as ‘hardcore’ by my father and his group of 50-somethings who have decided to single-handedly gatekeep the metal and hardrock genres, it can do anything.

1.  The Delicious Tomato Song 🍅 [Romano]: Beautiful, absolutely awe-inspiring, poignant, catchy lyrics with an extremely deep meaning that only years of meticulous research and analysis can unlock, Romano I love you.

BONUS: Closing Songs

5. Hatafutte Parade (World Series) 

4. Hetalian⭐Jet (The World Twinkle): The song is good, the dancing is cursed 

3. Chikyuu Marugoto Hug Shitainda (World⭐Stars)

2. Marukaite Chikyuu (Hetalia: Axis Powers): nE NE PaPA

1. Mawaru Chikyuu Rondo (The Beautiful World)

[rigelmejo]

Read approximately ~26,000 characters this weekend! (7/33 parts of the 124,000 character pingxie fic 夜半衣寒)

This particular story I'm reading extensively, on edge app *yes fuck I know* because Microsoft Edge has a very nice sounding TTS voice I'm using to listen to as I read along. So no word lookup on this one.

Happy to report to past me of 1 and 2 years ago: I understand this story much better now, it's as good as I remember, and very fun to catch all the details now. Also yes past me, you will eventually understand the details at speaking speed. Wooh! We are at this writers writing level! I can read 夏灬安兰 writing extensively now! (Also if you like pingxie fanfic I highly recommend this writer, their fanfic is on jjwxc, I love their world building aus that stay true to character and supernatural setting but also tell a new original story, 寒舍 is so freaking good, if I can finish this shorter fic I might go back to 寒舍 which is like 300k characters...)

Also very interesting personally to me? When I listen to the audio as I read certain "confusing" aspects of sentences seem to just be easier to understand. Like idioms and descriptive adjective words I have a much better guess of their meaning when I'm listening to the audio. I think part of it may be, I've read Iike 200 chapters by this author before so I have literally seen all these descriptives before, and looked them up in pleco and heard their pronunciation before. So I think the combo or both seeing them again (with vague recall) combined with hearing them again (and that vague recall) makes it easier for me to recognize them again. And they say like 12 times or less to remember a word so I'm guessing I'll have these phrases/adjectives learned soon if I don't already!

And verbs/nouns, I think because the audio moves me through a Full Sentence as One Whole quickly, become very clear in context. So even when I am running into unknown verbs and nouns in this, I'm able to figure them out in the context of the sentence and so that's been nice. I think maybe me slowing down my reading tended to make those kinds of words harder. Which is perhaps a lesson for me in rhe future: read a whole sentence before I decide I can't figure a word out. Because I'll probably get the word if I just finish reading the sentence.

A benefit of reading with the audio playing (both for this and 镇魂) is definitely the help it's giving me to remember hanzi pronunciations. That's always my weak spot, and my audio memory is decent once I hear things, so this is really helping.

Another observation: it is truly so funny to me how reading feels really Really reminiscent of how reading felt in my native language in English from about age 10 to 14. I remember in English, as a child so maybe 6-8 my dad got me these books on various school subjects to learn new stuff which you could click to have the toy read the sentences out loud, which helped me get much better at reading. (Which is lol literally what I'm doing now in chinese just better tech nowadays). And then around 3rd grade so like age 9 or right before, my dad sort of just pushed reading me Harry Potter before bed cause he was trying so hard to get me interested in reading. Eventually it paid off, I got interested in the story and annoyed we went so slow through the book since he only read a chapter at a time, so I picked up the book and read it myself. I don't remember the experience or how hard the book felt, but I know after that I got Into reading properly and read some James Mitchener Alaska novel of my dad's (just like 50 pages) which felt Hella similar to reading chinese advanced stuff now, read some Stephen King and Anne Rice and Stephen Hawking and Benjamin Franklin and just little bits of anything on my parents bookshelves (which all felt a bit like reading chinese does now). And then i was in 3rd grade and they placed me at high school reading level so i was in some advanced class that got sent to another school on Wednesdays to study at the higher level (reading and math maybe some other stuff). I remember in my class the kids like me who got sent off on Wednesdays got harder reading book assignments that whole year, and all years after in elementary. I remember either at beginning of middle school or right before I read Harry Potter 2-5 in like a week so I could get 6 when it came out (which was a premonition really of how motivating me to want to read X will get me to do a Lot apparently). And then by middle school I was reading at college level.

I remember just some point of being in middle school and discovering you know harder various novels and realizing I could go get whatever I wanted, and discovering fanfiction online and distinctively I remember seeing the words "melancholy" "angst" "macabre" and some particular in- words which I kept confusing that I actually bothered to Google the definition for because in both fanfic and Edgar Allen Poe class was making me read I just kept NOT figuring out precisely rhe nuance of those fucking words beyond "sad ish?" Which to be honest... is how I ended up remembering and learnjng most words anyway, as ultimately "synonym of X word or similar to Y word PLUS this particular feeling/vibe it gives me." But aside from a few struggle words, I picked up pretty much all the reading-level-leap vocabulary by context and guessing and steamrolling through.

I assume a partial reason I find the "ambiguity" of reading in a foreign language tolerable even when ambiguity is fairly High as a beginner, because in English I really just... did the same fucking thing. Yes I had more words in English (I think 10 year olds know about idk ~10,000 words in their native language). But I went from reading Hop on Pop Dr Seuss almost exclusively, to finally HP which got me to cave and try out (the much easier) Bunnicula and Catwings and book series with the kids who keep thinking ppl are supernatural creatures, then from there school threw me in the deep end so I just went okay then and picked up Whatever I Wanted and just would sit and chug through it (James Mitchner novels are so densely enjoyable as historical fiction but oh my god as an articulate educated well read adult I still run into plenty of unknown words like geological terms and historical objects and yet little 10 year old mejo was chugging through 50 pages of that with way less vocabulary than I know now).

So yeah, reading French felt like going through this process again too. But it was so Fast it almost felt like magic at times tbh (I did so little French study after year 1 it still blows my mind that's all that was needed to read), I'd just keep trying and trying to read and each time I just *could* read significantly better than the time before. Until about 2+ years in when reading in French started feeling just like english. At most it sometimes does feel like I'm in high school reading an unfamiliar adult author or subject when I pick up some French, but never really that "sink or swim and figure it out" kind of lost feeling.

Maybe part of it too is I'm definitely a jack of all trades more than a specialist (except when it comes to drawing character concept art/illustration, noting characterization, and writing/drawing/acting regarding characterization cause then yes I'm a mega specialist ToT). By this I mean, when I learn most topics I learn for usage more than recall of specific words or details. When I study any topic I study to figure out how it works, how to do it, how to explain how it works/teach how to do it if needed. I learn the minimum to do the needed tasks first (how's it work/how to do it) before remembering any finer details. I can't remember shit about quantum physics or the terms I had to recognize to read about it, but when I was studying it I knew enough of what it was and how to do quantum physics problems because that's what I needed to be able to do. I learned all about computers and how to fix them, and oh boy can I. I can also explain to a NON learner how to do the steps TO fix one. But I didn't remember the specific terms for a lot of the shit I do, or explain how to do - because I don't need to say the terms to Fix the computer and to a person who never learned them I can only tell them how yo follow my directions in simple language they'll understand. So I recognize the terms for computer objects when Others say them, or when I read about them or need to look up how to fix a new issue. But I don't keep specialist terms in my active vocabulary as I rarely use them in explanations to the average person I help (and if I do its only if they ask because they want to learn to look it up and fix it themselves more later) and I rarely use the terms myself unless I need to look up additional info for some very specific problem I don't already know how to fix. That's how I handle most of my English vocab. Now that I'm not in economics classes I forgot a bunch of words in "everyday use" for myself except inflation. But I can still read the specialized terms and recognize them and look them up to use them again if i need to have a particular on subject discussion. But I just do not tend to use my active memory to remember that kind of stuff, and I will lose active vocabulary if it stops being needed daily even if it's in English. I am good at learning, specifically learning to Do stuff. And I'm good at explaining, but explaining in the simplest terms because generally in life I run into situations where I'm explaining to people unfamiliar with specific terms (and in which the rare times specific terms come up its more often me defining and Explaining their simpler definition, because a student has run into X specialized environmental science term or geometry or calculus term and got themselves confused cause they forgot or never grasped what the specialized term meant). So I guess... idk... how I conceptualize things in English isn't actually a lot different from how I did growing up, and it's pretty similar to how I approach new languages vocabulary now too.

Tldr lol. Just the whole experience of reading chinese, and grasping all details but knowing I don't know X quite specifically, reminds me of my first time reading a Stephen King novel or Anne Rice novel or James Mitchner novel or Dracula, as a preteen and teen. I overall grasp all the details and enjoy the story, but there's also some degree of vagueness where some words are angst "probably sad related" or macabre "probably death related" or melancholic "probably depressed mood related" mahogany "probably red/wood related" vermillion "some kind of red" but they don't have a clearly defined niche of meaning in my mind yet. It's just sort of neat to really notice the process as an adult.

[waumpel]

ADHD STUDY TIPS

I have adhd. I'm taking all online classes this semester for college. Somehow, I'm not failing. Here's what I do that works for me!

1. I have an alarm that makes me do math every morning to turn it off, it's called Alarmy! 📚

2. It also plays a different loud sound every day from random-- I have several hundred(?) ringtones downloaded from Zedge, things like songs from shows I like or Pokemon cries or MBMBAM lines, and this helps me wake up to a different sound I'm bound to like which my brain can't get used to (and then ignore). I highly suggest godzilla roars if you need to be startled awake. 📚

3. This is SUPER HARD but I always try to force myself to sit up in bed when I'm turning off my alarm or checking my phone or whatever, so I'm not tempted to pass out again. I also like to get up and loudly tell my cats "good morning" so I wake us both up 📚

4. PLEASE STOP EATING CEREAL AND BAGELS AND STUFF. You would not BELIEVE the difference it makes when you eat things like fruits and eggs in the morning. NO MORE 10AM NAPS, I'M WATCHING YOU 📚

5. I literally schedule in Duolingo time. If you aren't learning a language you can do some other enriching activity like this, idk. I force myself to do it on my computer, not phone, so I can't lay down in bed when I'm doin it. I have a 101-day streak!! 📚

6. ik this isn't available to everyone but SPACE MATTERS SO MUCH!! I got a gaming desk that we put in our living room and I do ALL of my homework there. I also got a second monitor for my laptop with is SOOOO important if you're multitasking (and we all are, bc we're adhders ibdusvcjkn) 📚

7. HAND WRITE YOUR NOTES!!! I know this is super hard for many people-- I have carpal tunnel so I get it lmao. If you can't, at least type them. YOU THINK YOU CAN MEMORIZE INFO BUT YOU'RE WRONG!! Please write as much as you can i swear it will change ur life 📚

8. COLOURED! PENS!!! These changed the game for me y'all. I take all my notes in at least 2 colours, and I cycle through them a lot. My favs are Pilot Frixions because u can erase them :) (the highlighters are epic too) 📚

9. Make your space fun, but NOT DISTRACTING. I have a plant (his name is Yoshi) and a desk Godzilla (his name is Godzilla) on my desk, but they're out of the way so I can't zone out starin at em. But also, when I'm bored outta my gourd, I can smile at Yoshi and tell him how my day is goin :] 📚

10. SNACKING BAD *BUT*... sometimes i do it anyway... i try to associate certain foods with subjects, like I eat cocoa M&Ms (which are awesome) when I'm reading my Kaqchikel textbook. On the upside, I think it helps me recall Kaqchikel better? but also the language makes me crave mnms adkldigurvn 📚

11. LISTEN TO... CERTAIN MUSIC. I have learned that music with words, even in LANGS I DO NOT KNOW, is HELL for my adhd. Right now I'm listening to stuff like "Pokemon and Chill" (lofi album on YT), Studio Ghibli violin covers, and Night on Bald Mountain 5x on repeat ibjnvc.... I highly suggest songs/videos that are, like, 20+ minutes or else you'll get distracted with the constant change. Also, that No One's Around To Help 1hr vid is REALLY REPETITIVE and therefore PERFECT for when I'm reading textbooks. 📚

12.  EVERY NIGHT... i make a super detailed timetable schedule for the next day, down to the half hour. I don't always follow it but it's a really good reminder of what I gotta do. I write it on a whiteboard but sometimes I also write it on a sticky note and on social media so I don't forget. To do lists are so epic you guys 📚

13. THIS HAS SAVED MY L I F E: at the beginning of the semester I looked at ALL of my syllabi and wrote down EVERY daily task, test, homework, etc BY DATE. this is essentially a premade to do list EVERY DAY for MONTHS and oh my gosh it is the best thing I have ever done. 📚

14. I use the Forest app to track my productivity AND lock me out of apps ndsjv... podomoro timers work well too!!! 📚

15. Ok so for me this is like... a religious thing bc my Patron (my God) is a deity of fire AND working, but I like to light a candle (scented like FALL!!) and do a little prayer on it and I have it next to me when I'm workin on terrible, terrible homework. It helps me feel like my Patron is here with me, but also it’s GREAT for grounding and I can just kinda. Stare blankly at the flame and then get back to tryin to focus. 📚

16. Please drink water lmao, to make sure I drink enough I set little goals like "take a sip after every paragraph you read" 📚

17. Each of my classes has a different coloured notebook which I'm consistent with! Like, all my German notebooks through the years have been green! Also I take notes w green pens a lot in Deutsch 📚

18. HELLA STICKY NOTES... I put em on the bottom of my monitor, on a shelf by my desk, in my books as bookmarks (bad idea lol), on Yoshi. When I wanna go look up something random but I need to focus, I like to write it down on sticky notes to look at later. 📚

19. I'm the most annoying student ever. I like to do a bunch of assignments at once so I don't have to budget my time later, so I'll turn in like 5 things in an hour and then NOTHING for a week. ALSO i email my teachers constantly if I have any questions at all. I work at a pace that works for me!!! 📚

20. I turn off my sound on my phone until I'm done with work bc otherwise I WILL open that notification 📚

22. I make a loooot of chai (and also some overpriced herbal teas). It makes me feel fancy, it's better for me than coffee, and it helps me ground and focus! Plus it's a samefood! 📚

23. Hyperfixating on classic literature would be awesome, except I'm hyperfixating on Gothic and I'm taking a lit class for More Than Just Gothic. But I'm figuring out ways to connect them, which is really helpful, cause I get to enjoy my hyperfixation while learning for school! PLZ TRY TO DO THIS (harder when you're hyperfixating on godzilla :pensivecowboy:) 📚

21. When I have extra time I write my notes like I'm plannin to put em on Tumblr and taggin em as #darkacademia... I never post my notes, but when they look nice it's easier for me to look over em later. Plus it takes me longer to write so I remember it a lil better!! 📚

24. I'm in an awesome academia + studyspo server!! We sometimes study together on call and it's SUCH a good motivator! Here's an invite link if u wanna join, we are nice https://discord.gg/fjuX7TN (this wasn’t meant to be a promo post I just really like this group lol) 📚

OK I hope that helps!!! Feel free to add more if you have any tips that work for you :) Neurotypicals, feel free to RB respectfully!

(pics are: syllabus list, daily schedule, Yoshi the plant, and some fancy notes)

[bokunoheroanalysisforthefuture]

Whoo boy, been a little bit. I can’t really say much besides IRL sucks, so. Back to something that doesn’t suck, which is BNHA. This chapter is dedicated to the good bean Tenya, especially his little smile which forced me to change my pfp on discord because I just couldn’t.

I was kinda planning on doing arc summaries between sections, but honestly, the BNHA wiki already has those, so if you don’t want to go back and read through all the posts I’ve done for the pre-USJ chapters, just head over there and do a skim of the summaries there, I guess?

[No. 12 - Yeah, Just Do Your Best, Iida!]

I just love how his hand gestures are actual effective tools against enemies, I cannot even. Also, a good and friendly reminder that carbonated drinks stall his engines! I have never seen that used in fanfic, whether for crack or whump purposes… a shame.

We head right into the next morning from that battle training, with the kids being held up by the media as they ask about All Might. Izuku is a bundle of nerves as he awkwardly excuses himself to the nurse’s office, Ochako is a darling who describes All Might as super muscly, and Tenya goes into a whole ass speech with a lot of fancy language to explain the honor of being at UA and learning under All Might. 

(Honestly, I find it hard to determine whether this is genuinely earnest or if he’s picked up media warding skills from his parents and older brother. It’s probably genuine, but I just love the idea behind low-key troll master Tenya who learned from the best, aka his older brother.)

Katsuki, unfortunately, is still known as ‘the kid from the sludge incident’, which I mean. I am so fucking baffled at how long the media in this have held onto that 'sludge incident' thing, like, you'd think they'd have moved on to other things by now and don't really think about it much.

It’s the same with the general public (as seen in chapter 3), like, yes, I too would have a fucking complex and anger issues if all anyone thought about in relation to me wasn't my high grades or my skill in combat or anything, but that one time a year ago where I was almost suffocated to death while the people who were supposed to save my life did fucking nothing. I mean, Katsuki has always had a complex, but This Didn't Help.

Moving on, we see the media wondering who the fuck this messy looking dude waving them off is, while Aizawa just. Fucking shoos them like they’re dogs or kids or something. His words seem like a vague attempt at being polite about shooing them, but with the hand gesture, well. Basically comes off more as a chastisement. 

...honestly, this feels so weird that no one knew about it even though the kids who got in got a message from All Might saying he’d be teaching there. The only thing I and the others can assume is that there was an NDA on him teaching until it was announced to the newspapers on the first day of classes. Which would explain why it didn’t hit the news until said day…

Whatever, it’s weird, let’s just move on.

One of the reporters steps forward, asking/demanding a chance to speak to All Might about his sudden shift to teaching, only for the guy behind her to try and call out a warning - just a touch too late, as the sensors over the gate react, causing the daunting hunk of metal serving as a gate to slam closed right in front of her. Gonna guess she’s new to the reporting scene. The guy explains that the UA barrier locks down if someone without a school ID approaches the gate, and that supposedly there are more sensors throughout the campus.

The panel gives us a diagram of the three ‘levels’ of sensors - the gate/wall around the school, the walkway to the school, and the school itself. Which I think correlates to the security levels that come up later, since it’s a ‘level three’ breach, which means the school was broken into. Was it… always that fucking simple and I just totally glossed over that detail until now? orz

While the newsfolk complain about not getting comments from UA, we get to see the back of a ~mysterious figure~ who definitely isn’t the primary antagonist of the entire series. God, you can see his individual neck vertebrae.

Horrifying.

We transition to 1a’s homeroom, with Aizawa going over the battle training as well as their grades / evaluations. Aizawa calls out Katsuki and tells him to grow up and stop wasting his talent, which Katsuki grudgingly accepts. Izuku jolts at being called out next over his broken arm, and accepts the chastisement of learning to control his quirk, because trying isn’t going to cut it. Aizawa does soften the blow, however, by repeating that Izuku has potential, assuming he overcomes that issue.

With that done, Aizawa ‘Plus Extra™’ Shouta gets the whole class tense by drawing out the next class announcement. While I think it’s a translation error, the whole class sweating as they wonder whether it’s another brutal pop quiz is hella funny. (I’m guessing it was meant to be ‘test’ which would reference to the quirk assessment as well as the battle training, but ah well.) The whole class sighs in relief as one as Aizawa finally reveals that their task for the morning is to choose a class president - a normal, school-like thing in comparison to the past two days.

Pretty much the entire class has their hands raised to volunteer for the position, with Katsuki being particularly aggressive about it (as per the norm). Even Izuku has his hand shyly lifted up from the desk, while his narration notes that the position in normal schools entails mundane tasks, but in UA’s hero course means leading the group - a position suited for a top hero in the making.

Tenya calls for them all to quiet down, drawing attention as he goes on to explain how leading people is a task of heavy responsibility, but that ambition is not equal to ability. He is so intense it’s hilarious as he explains how the office demands the trust of its constituents, and that if it’s to be a democracy, then he puts forward the motion that they choose their leader through election.

Seriously this is just so fucking hilarious, I love this boy so much. And I love whoever it is that calls out that this is a classroom, not congress. 

Tsuyu points out that the class hasn’t known each other long enough to build trust, and Kirishima notes that everyone will vote for themselves. Tenya points out that that is precisely the reason that anyone who gets multiple votes will be the best suited for the job. He then checks with Aizawa if this is allowable, which the teacher agrees to so long as it’s quick. And a quick transition, we reveal the winners-

Izuku with three votes, and Momo with two.

Everyone else, it seems, still has one vote, which was their own (as predicted). Izuku is shook. Katsuki is shaking in anger as he demands to know who the hell voted for Deku. Ochako is whistling and looking away, thinking that she’d better not let Katsuki find out.

(Also of note is that Sero is already approaching Katsuki and making a joke here about it being obvious Katsuki wasn’t one of Izuku’s votes, and then seemingly laughing a bit when Katsuki’s temper turns on him?

Hard to say for sure, but it seems Sero is the first of Katsuki’s future friend group to approach him and get away with poking at his temper. Which I feel is something very much overlooked by the fandom in favor of Kirishima for fairly obvious reasons.)

Tenya, meanwhile, is in a funk as he notes he has no votes, and that that is the harsh reality of office. Momo is concerned as she notes that zero votes meant he voted fro someone else, while Sato points out that Tenya was the one to suggest the election, so what did he seriously want? Izuku and Momo go to the front of the class - Izuku a nervous wreck while Momo’s just exasperated with the situation. Aizawa confirms their positions as he gets out of his sleeping bag, and the class talk a bout about the suitability of the chosen pair while Tenya continues to sulk in his seat.

With that, the first half of the chapter is done, so I’ll call it here. I can certainly say I learned a thing or two today, and I hope y’all did as well!

[revenantghost]

Yeah, the rumor about Nightow being Christian is so fascinating to me because it's so firmly and deeply rooted and referenced all around, but I haven't found the source for it myself (if it still even exists). My kingdom for the old con panels and interviews to be accessible.

Ah yes, that one! I read that one when my head let me, despite it being hella hard for me to read those kinds of posts; between migraines and other issues with it just being images, those interviews are just hella inaccessible for me ): I wanted to reread it a bit ago, but that can't happen. My kingdom for accessible interviews, too lol.

I do have my reasons for how I feel about the ending, and having gone up to vol 12 with bookclub and reading others' posts have only cemented it, but I'll wait until when/if I ever have the time. So your takeaway is valid, but I also stand by mine being valid.

I think that there is some decent reason to believe that if Nightow wanted some things changed in the narrative, that Orange would be all about it. The sci-fi setting was mentioned as being as Nightow's idea at Sakuracon and other interviews, and of course Nightow changed the colt to the peashooter that Vash now has because it makes sense for his character according to a recent tweet on Watanabe's Twitter. He was also involved a little differently and a little more in-depth in the planning process than most other authors over the course of... months of drinking and partying with Orange lmao??? As you can hear in Trash Taste's podcast. Some of the most controversial changes with Tristamp come from Nightow himself.

I think that changes that Nightow wanted to make will likely be reflected in Tristamp given the degree of respect and almost awe that Orange members seem to have for the guy when they talk about him at cons (the sci-fi setting thig should be in the first masterpost here). But also, that's if it fits the new narrative and he even wants that stuff changed. I think that it was in the Trash Taste interview as well along with a few other places that Nightow's said that he only wanted another Trigun if it was its own thing. He gave the thumbs up at an early stage (even if he still had to approve the overarching bits) because it captured the heart and soul of Trigun, but it's not the same, of course. Props to Nightow for getting some high-budget, first-class fanfic of his own franchise made, mad respect

Tl;dr: I think it's valid to think we'll see more changes to the narrative based on things that Nightow would like to see, but you're right that it's 100% it's own thing and that's what's so exciting about Tristamp. I've talked to a few og manga fans who love Tristamp because you can know the source material, but you have no idea what's coming or what they'll do with it. I haven't seen any takes that think that Tristamp will become Trimax in a 1:1 way, but I am curious if we'll see more major changes inspired by Nightow and things he's said in interviews following the ending of Trimax--especially after that major vacation he had post-Trimax.

Idk if this makes sense because I woke up due to a fever and aches and I'm a bit of a shaking mess lmao. I just wanted to validate everyone's takeaways with my post since my last one inspired some essays I know I don't have the brainpower to process right now (though I am so, so, so curious to see what they do with reimagining it all in Tristamp--WHAT are they doing with Wolfwood). Now back to passing out.

You know, I think one of the coolest things about Trimax and how it ends is how unique the experience is to everyone, and how valid that is. I'm sick as a dog and hella groggy, so forgive me if I'm misremembering or my phrasing is weird, but I remember reading an interview where Nightow was asked whether Knives was alive or dead at the end of the manga. And he did give an answer, but he specified that was just his intention, and that everyone should walk away with their own opinion (something along those lines, I'm paraphrasing and cannot remember the source).

Nightow has also said that his intention with the ending was for it to be hopeful, but he would also later say that he was so incredibly burnt out and exhausted and that he would change some things if he could. I think you can read all of that in his work. So for me, my first (and thus-far only) readthrough left me with a distinct feeling of tragedy, exhaustion, and of cycles repeating. But everyone who walked away feeling hopeful and like the future is bright and infinite is also correct. And it really speaks to the deeply human nature of Trigun, and the way that its story speaks to us and our unique experiences and what life has taught us, I think. The song of humanity sings in all of us in all different ways.

Idk man, I need to sleep but I just think Trigun is neat.

[king-finnigan]

Tips for Studying During a Pandemic but I’m Depressed

I’ve been seeing a few ‘Studying During a Pandemic’ posts, and while I appreciate the advice they give, it’s usually just not doable for me, so I figured, hey, why not make my own list of half-measures for people with depression, like me? So here’s my list of little things that have made it all a little less terrible the past few months.

(Feel free to add your own. I’m just one person, and things that worked for me might not work for you.)

(Also, some of these aren’t even about studying directly, but they do benefit it inderectly.)(Also also, this post was getting a bit long, so more under the cut.)

Go to the toilet: This might seem obvious, but I know for a fact that I tend to just... ignore my urge to pee when I’m having a particularly bad day, but really, just go. It’ll make you feel a lot better. And if you tend to just not feel it, make sure to check in with your body every once in a while.

Get out of bed before noon: I’ve seen a few lists that urge you to maintain a 9-5 workday, but, hell, even on a good day I only manage to drag myself out of bed at 9. Just get out before noon, you’ll feel a lot more accomplished if you get out at 11:45 than if you get out at 12:15. 

Change your underwear, and, if you can, the rest of your clothes: Even if it’s just changing from your Casual Sweats to your A Little Less Casual Sweats, it’ll feel a lot better. And if you wear socks, change those, too. It’ll make you feel a lot cleaner, and it’ll reset your mind, making it easier to transition from Bed Time to Not In Bed Time.

Set a soft start: Pick an hour at which you aim to start studying, and pick it so that it’s about an hour or so after the point at which you start feeling productive. That sounds complicated, but, for example, I usually start feeling productive between 11 or 12. My soft start is set at 1. On good days, when I do start working at 11 or 12, I will feel accomplished for starting before my soft start point, on bad days, I will aim to start at 1, but if I can’t, I won’t beat myself up over it. It is, after all, a soft start. It’s just an anchor to keep you from floating around the day, no strings attached. Your soft start can be set at 3, 4, even 5, it doesn’t matter, it’s just here to give you some sense of structure.

Set a hard stop: Pick an hour at which you will stop studying, and set it around the time you usually stop feeling productive altogether. Mine is at 6. When you reach your hard stop, just drop everything and go relax. Unless, of course, you’re feeling productive still, in which case, you have to move your hard stop, because you should set it at the point where you’re no longer feeling productive so that you don’t try to push yourself past your abilities or limits. If it’s time to stop, it’s time to stop. 

You do not need to study from your soft start to your hard stop: I know I don’t. They’re just anchor points, to give some structure to your day. I know for a fact that I have trouble to separate Study Time from Not Study Time, that’s what these points are for, especially the hard stop. Do not set the goals to push yourself past your limits, these goals are supposed to adapt to you, not the other way around. Unless it’s what you really want, and you feel confident you won’t harm your mental health in order to reach them, in which case, knock yourself out (but safely).

Every hour, check in with your body: Does your head hurt? Do you need to pee? Are you hungry? If there’s anything wrong, take care of that first. Your health - both mental and physical - is your nr. 1 priority, not studying. If you feel like you need to take a break, then take one, if you don’t, then don’t. 

Eat something: Anything. Doesn’t matter. Doesn’t have to be healthy, if you can’t bring yourself to do that. Just eat something. If you can bring yourself to eat fruit and veggies, good for you, but I can’t on my worst days, and if you can’t either, you shouldn’t beat yourself up over it. 

Okay, but maybe one or two apples a week would be good: Just any piece of fruit, really. Once or twice a week. If you eat fruit more often than that, hey, good for you, I’m proud of you, buddy. If you can’t, just once or twice a week is great and I’m still very proud of you.

Drink something: Again, anything. If it’s soda? Not the greatest, but hell, it’s better than nothing. Tea or coffee is good, too. Fruit juice helps you get some vitamins if you can’t eat the fruit. And if you drink water? That’s fucking amazing, good for you. I know I can’t. (Yet)

Open a window: Oxygen is good for your brain. I don’t really give a fuck about that when I open my window, though - what I give a fuck about is that it makes me feel hella productive. 

Just do whatever makes you feel productive: That feeling already does a lot more for you than things that are productive but don’t make you feel as such. And, in my experience, if I feel productive, I will be more likely to actually also do productive shit.

Pick your battles: If you feel like you can’t handle all of the shit that’s being thrown at you (I know I can’t), then don’t. Pick one or two things that you’re sure you can handle when you focus on them, and focus on them. If you’ve got assignments for other classes you can’t miss, then do the bare minimum to pass them. (Please do note that I have a chance to redo any exams I’m skipping in the summer. Take this advice with a grain of salt if you can’t.)

Find a way to reward yourself: If it’s with food or episodes of your favourite show, it doesn’t matter. Find a way to proportionally reward yourself - so when you’ve done a lot, you get a lot of the reward, if not, just a little. I reward myself by making paper stars. I just enjoy making them and I can put them in a little jar and admire how much work I’ve done in total over the past few weeks. 

Only reward yourself after your hard stop: I know if I don’t do that, I’ll get too caught up in the reward to be productive. Also it just feels nicer to get a lot of it all at once at the end of the day.

Don’t beat yourself up at the end of the day: The hard stop is also a reset for your mentality. It’s the end of the day, what is done is done, there’s nothing you can do about it. We all have our good days and we all have our bad days. Don’t beat yourself up over the bad ones, give yourself a pat on your shoulder for the good ones. Which days are bad and which ones are good is not in your control, no matter how much you feel like it is. All there’s left to do is recharge so that you can try again tomorrow.

Relax. Actually relax: Whether you’re just going to bed again, or watching your favourite show, or playing a video game, it doesn’t matter. Just forget about school work. Fuck that shit. It’s You Time now, no matter how much you feel like you don’t deserve it - and for that matter, fuck that little voice inside your head telling you you’re not worthy, too. You are.

It could be worse: This sounds wrong, but hear me out. If you are beating yourself up over the things you couldn’t do today, then list the things you did do. For example: “Sure, I didn’t study, but I got out of bed, I ate an apple, and I checked my mails! It could be worse!” If you can’t find anything, then remind yourself that you tried, so, again, it could be worse.

You tried: That also sounds really condescending, but listen. Whenever you feel like you haven’t done enough or you failed, take a moment to tell yourself that you tried. There’s a lot of things dragging you down right now: the pandemic, the absolute fucking state of the world, your depression, what-fucking-ever. Things aren’t easy, and yet, you still tried. Hell, if you’ve even read my bs up to this point, it means you’re trying. And I know your mind is telling you it’s not good enough, but it is, because the best thing we can do is try. You tried, and that’s worth a hell of a lot more than your mind is trying to convince you it is.

Also check your mails.

[forbidding-souda]

About Mod Souda

You guys should talk to me in the ask box more smh you guys are fun

Like just tell me about your day but I won’t guarantee that like 1000% I’ll respond but I’ll read them all.... efkjlwdbsc or or ask me questions or something idk I like talking

1500 followers face reveal when (shocked emoji) /srs

Anyways here’s some things about me because I never really introduced myself (since this is my account and why would I do an introduction)

THIS IS LITERALLY MY LIFE STORY GOODBYE BAHSBAH

-Mod Souda 

Hi I am Mod Souda and I go by he/him ofc ofc I am a gay man.

Uhh I am an a native amercan mixed kid AND an Aquarius ugh I’m so unique right. I was raised by a raver and a metalhead skater in Vegas. I’ve been in the pit since I was 4 years old (specifically at a Primus concert LMAO).

The first fandom I was in was Creepypasta, and I was about 8 years old. It’s funny because the first musician I ever actively liked was Madame Macabre. 

As a child (like 7-11) I mainly listened to Vocaloid, Madame Macabre, and Nicki Minaj.

When Avengers came out I was still in elementary school. And .. Loki... wrjhfbwejdhb bro!! gay awakening!! holy shit. I was in love with him but I didn’t want to admit it smh shhh.

The first anime I ever watched was Black Butler. I was IN LOVE with Joker from Book of Circus ehbwdjqshdfb. The last episode of that season ended the day I moved to California. I remember crying bc of the last scene inside of the moving truck.

I also got into Fairy Tail a lot. Also tragic. I had the hugest crush on Gajeel Redfox mmmmmemdwkgsnekfdjsglkvcx

I live in the Bay Area, and grew up in the same house, compared to living in Vegas where I moved every two years. There are ... so many poc here ... and in vegas I was in a class with all white people. Being around so many poc was so like ?? fun ?? idk how to describe it but it feels like how life should feel like; not stressful at all.

I started listening to goth music when I was 12 because I was in the Mr. Creepypasta amino and somebody was like “you guys should join the goth amino” and I was like oh that sounds so fun !!! Boom... goth Mod Souda arrived.

I was all about Sopor Aeternus and Switchblade Symphony. 

I discovered my lifelong favorite artist in like 2016. It was because I was making playlist for my Fairy Tail oc (tragic) and I added this song I got off of a “Creepypasta Theme Songs” and it was Bernadette by IAMX (which was assigned to Laughing Jack). And I listened to the song and was like meh this is cool. Then one day I played the playlist and it just.... hit different. LMAO I was like waiitittttititit. The next day, on the way to the airport, I downloaded all 7 (at the time) of his albums and listened to them the whole way. I’ve seen him live too like mm chris corner I love you.

I got into DR in 2015 because of an edit of (anime) Syo and Junko to Pound the Alarm LOL. I was like “this looks cool” so I watched it on my phone while sitting on the couch all in one go. Spoilers but I cried the most when mondo and sakura died, fun fact. Life went down from there smh!! 

I really believed that I was dating Gundham Tanaka. Like everything in my life was Gundham Tanaka related like I was ... obsessed with him. And I coudln’t see art of him and sonia because it would make me have a breakdown bc I thought he was cheating on me PLZ BHDSABHJBAHAAHHA it’s funny because I kin sonia now and I’m in love with her.

This was the same year where I ???? got bruises on my eardrums somehow (I asked my dad recently how I got them and he went uhh idk) ???? and I couldn’t hear anything for like three years plz. My hearing has gotten better but idk if my ear percentage is 100%/100% or if I’m just grateful it isn’t what it is before LMAO so that’s when I started learning ASL.

This is also the same year where I got hospitalized for being a neurodevelopmental schizophrenic lol OOPS !

A funny story of me growing up with danganronpa is uhh when future arc was still airing ,,, Spoilers,, and the episode with Juzo passing aired,, I literally printed the frame of him talking to himself confessing his love and BROUGHT IT TO SCHOOL. I LIT A CANDLE FOR HIM TOO LIKE BYE

Freshman year of highschool I started dating an emo kid who brought his electric guitar to school. TRAGIC. We dated for like two years please what.

Sophomore year I started getting into metal and punk. This is mainly because I went to a Slayer concert. I was trying to branch out of my goth bubble and !!! metal really stuck with me. My favorite subgenre is goregrind. It’s mmm so good. Punk... was a miss. I absolutely hate punks. If anyone in the alternative community is reading this right now I’ll tell you this: the punks that I interacted with to learn more about the community were from OC .... goodbye

I still listen to Glass Street tho ^ they are hc/crossover and I really like their music omg I have their merch now plz HBSAJKH and I still like the patch pants / crusties I made so that’s cool. A lot of kids look up / glamorize me just because of my fashion but at least they give me clout ig ...

The year after that I downloaded Spotify for the first time. I was an apple music/youtube person (tragic). Uhh what else omg. I finally figured out that I was neurodevelopmental and that it affected my way of thinking and that ,, it wasn’t JUST because I am sch so that was an awakening.

Anyways now trying to get a minor in asl interpreting mmmm and trying to get a job SMH !! why is it so hard. I’m into DND now oo that’s new and I’m collecting the dice.

I started this blog in July 2020 when I was staying with my friend in a tent in New York for a couple of months. I forced her to watch despair arc (LOL) and now she’s a junko cosplayer so B^)

Metalhead anon and everyone else who’s been here for a long ass time make me SOOO happy like woah.. it’s been so long omg. I used to post fics three times a day like wtf the EFFORT (that was before school started lol oops my bad)

Since then I’ve got a boyfriend and a whole wave of danganronpa cosplayers who are my friends now. It’s really cool to talk to so many young people (sometimes) who are hella into like,, open conversations about gender and politics and whatnot. I’m used to talking to 20 year old goth people you know? 

Whenever I do something “cringey” (like if I want to do dr character impersonations or if I want to rant about how much I love this anime character or if I want to try out neopronouns) I’m like hmmmm I can go to the danganronpa cosplayers and I know they won’t judge me for this.

Anyways that’s it. It’s 22:50 where I am right now aaaanndd I go on this blog way more than I should LOL