#it certainly is low-effort post on my part

[leather-n-velvet]

High & Low: Part VII

A Drew Starkey x singer/actress!oc SMAU

Summary: While on hiatus from touring and wanting to branch out with her career, Ivy Blake auditions for OBX, immediately hitting it off with none other than Drew Starkey during their chemistry read. As tension and drama brew between the two, can they get through the highs and lows that come with fame and relationships together?

A/N: Small blurb today along with the usual posts! Kind of a filler chapter. Enjoy!!!

Dividers by: @cafekitsune ⭐️🌙

Previous Part // Masterlist

Ivy was confused, to say the least. Why on earth would O*dessa be messaging her about Drew? Irritation flared inside her as she considered even opening the message.

She glanced over at Drew, who was peacefully sleeping, completely unaware of the constant thoughts plaguing her mind regarding his relationship with O*dessa. He didn’t recognize the discomfort she felt each time her name came up. It wasn’t like Ivy to be so wary of a friend of her boyfriend; she usually made a significant effort to get to know them. But something was stopping her, especially after her conversation with Madelyn just a few days earlier.

It felt as if she didn’t want to accept the possibility that her suspicions were valid, and she certainly didn’t want to confront them head-on. She knew she needed to talk to Drew about her feelings, but how could she bring it up without sounding crazy and jealous?

Ivy wanted their relationship to thrive on communication and honesty, and if she didn’t confess her feelings now, she feared she would only build a wall between them. She understood that she’d never be able to fully let him in if she didn’t start now.

Letting people in had always been difficult for her. After being played and used by too many people in her almost 26 years, she learned those lessons the hard way. This time, with Drew, she refused to let that pattern continue. She had fallen hard for him and, for the first time in her life, saw a future with someone. There was no way she could throw that away over some silly insecurities.

These thoughts kept her awake until the sun began peeking through the cream-colored curtains in her childhood bedroom, causing Drew to start stirring.

Ivy felt his arms wrap around her, pulling her to his chest and pressing a kiss to her neck. “What are you doing up so early?”

“Couldn’t sleep,” she sighed, turning in his embrace to lay across his bare chest, melting into him. “Guess I had a lot on my mind.”

His arms tightened around her. “Anything you want to share with the class?”

She chuckled half-heartedly, her heartbeat thrumming nervously in her chest. “Actually, yes. It’s about O*dessa.”

Drew stiffened. “What about her?”

“She messaged me on Instagram last night, asking me to get you to reach out to her.”

“I feel like there’s more on your mind than that.”

Ivy hesitated, feeling her hands start to shake as the fear of potential confrontation took over. She didn’t like being that girl—laying her insecurities bare and discussing her feelings. In the past, it had always led to conflict. She had a habit of bottling things up just to let them go without a fight, finding herself a human doormat. This relationship with Drew would not be like that, even if it physically pained her to go against everything she was accustomed to.

She sat up, turning to face him and occupying her hands with the hem of the threadbare t-shirt she had dug up from high school. “Um, there is. I’ve just had this feeling about her. Like there’s something off about her vibe. The whole thing with the event mix-up last week has been really bothering me.”

Drew closed his eyes, mentally battling the guilt about the situation. He had been deciding whether to tell her that the entire thing had been a setup, manufactured by none other than O*dessa herself.

“Baby, why didn’t you tell me about any of this?”

Ivy sighed, avoiding his gaze. “I didn’t want to cause any problems. I know you’re close to her, and I’d never tell you who you can and can’t be friends with, but my gut is just telling me something is off.”

“Do you not trust me?”

“Of course I do. I just think it’s her. She seems very dependent on you, and I get that, but…”

Drew noticed Ivy’s shaking hands as she started to pick at her nails—a nervous habit that usually emerged when she felt anxious or overwhelmed. It pained him to see her so torn up just discussing something that bothered her. If he could, he would personally confront everyone who had ever made her feel like a burden for sharing her feelings. He knew how hard this was for her and he hated that he couldn’t help her more.

His hands found hers. “Sweetheart, look at me.”

She glanced up, meeting those denim-blue eyes that she adored.

“I swear to you, you have nothing to worry about. We are just friends, and we have only ever been just friends. You’re my girl. I feel terrible about missing your event, and I promise to start writing everything down so there aren’t any more mix-ups.” He rubbed his thumb across hers, feeling her shaking start to lessen. “But I need you to talk to me about things. I know your past has made you hesitant to open up, but this is different, baby. We’re different. I want to know every single thought that goes through that beautiful head of yours.”

“I’ll try.”

______

drewstarkey

Liked by haley_james, JillianBlake, and 2,347,766 others.

drewstarkey happy birthday stink 🧜🏼‍♀️

View comments

User1 HAPPY BDAY IVY

user2 this is so cute

User3 no one’s gonna talk about the 2nd pic???

railaslovechild THEIR BIRTHDAYS ARE ONLY A DAY APART 🥹

user4 HBD QUEEN

starboyd

Liked by JillianBlake, brooke_starkey, and 123 others.

starboyd Happy birthday, angel 🩵

View comments

sonotivyleague 🥹 happy to be spending and almost sharing a birthday with u 🩵

madrecliner I TOLD YALL TO STOP IT 😭

lacigurl HAPPY BIRTHDAY GORGEOUS 💋

brooke_starkey happy birthday, pretty girl! ☺️

ivyblake

Liked by drewstarkey, hichasestokes, and 23,387,977 others.

ivyblake it’s been a good day 🩵

View comments

madelyncline 26 HAS NEVER LOOKED HOTTER

carlaciagrant happy bday gorgeous girl 🫶🏾

madisonbaileybabe HAPPY BIRTHDAY ANGEL FACE

drewstarkey🪽🩵

user4 HI DREW

user5 DID ANYBODY SEE DREW’S STORY JUST NOW??!

railaslovechild OMFG DID HE SET THIS UP?! MY HEART 🥹😭

o*dessaazion hbd

user1 🤨 @/user2

user2 @/user1 🥸

sabrinacarpenter happy birthday darling 🩷🩷🩷

TheIvyLeague HAPPY BIRTHDAY QUEEN 🎁🎉🎈

ivyblakeupdates HAPPY BIRTHDAY YOU LOVELY HUMAN

ivyblake

Liked by brooke_starkey, railaslovechild, and 21,332,456 others.

ivyblake happy birthday drewby doo, hoping you had your daily pb&j to make it the best day 🩵

View comments

drewstarkey I suspiciously had a freezer full of Uncrustables this morning, any idea how that happened???

ivyblake that’s so strange 🤭

user1 they aren’t even trying to hide it anymore 😂

railaslovechild MARRY EACH OTHER RN

madelyncline Happy birthday drewseph!!!

DrewIvyUpdates SO CUTE HBD DREW

DrewIvyUpdates wait is that IVY'S NECKLACE IN THE 3RD PIC

sonotivyleague

Liked by haley_james, lacigurl, and 213 others.

sonotivyleague birthday boy 🩵

View comments

JillianBlake happy birthday sweet boy!

starboyd thank you mama Jill! madelyncline already in good with the in laws I see 🤭

rude_boy hbd drewseph!!!

lacigurl HAPPY BIRTHDAY BESTIE!!!

o*dessaazion

Liked by ivyblake, drewstarkey, and 877,323 others.

o*dessaazion Happy birthday Joseph. Keep eating that pb n j once a day, it's really good for ur bones

View comments

user3 ummm, did she just somewhat copy Ivy's bday post???

user4 this is umm.... yeah

user5 Ivy liked....

hater1 I LOVE U GUYS

haley_james lol...ok

user4 HOLY FUCK user2 did not see that coming

A/N: Not Haley being messy 🫣

THANK YOU for all of your support!!! Please let me know what you think and don't forget to like and reblog! My inbox is always open for any thoughts or discussions you would like to have about Drew/Ivy! I would love to hear from y'all.

Taglist: @davinashifts333, @rafegf-real, @chalahyung01, @jjmaybankmylovee, @f4irywor1d

[tohwitchesduels]

Pokemon Typings of competitors of the tournament

Silly post I felt like doing this because yes I got inspired from analysing Boscha and Willow's battle so here you go:

Willow Park - Grass/Fighting - (obviously Willow is the most powerful plant witch in this tournament along with having gains and fighting using brute force and the strength of her heart)

Hunter Deamonne - Fighting/Psychic - (since Hunter is a trained fighter, the fighting type is a choice by default. I picked psychic type as a secondary so it could tie all of his more magical abilities together neatly as his power of levitation, telekinesis, and even teleportation and creation can be very much related to psychic types in my book)

Luz Noceda - Normal/Dragon - (Luz is a human so on her own she's normal but I give her dragon as a second typing due to her wielding String Bean which resembles Dratini, the first and original dragon-type Pokemon introduced a lot and Luz has connection to the titans' magic that can conquer elements and has overall a lot of raw power that Luz cultivated over time)

Amity Blight - Ground/Ghost - (the way Amity uses her magic suggests she uses mud most of the time rather than either using poison and while her technique is similar to waterbending, her goo does not act like water by itself so I delved more into ghost-typing to a) reference her palismen b) reference how original waterbenders drive their strength and learned how to bend from the moon spirit and c) to connect Amity's personality and aesthetic)

Gus Porter - Psychic/Ghost - (being an illusion master means he of course would be a psychic type, along with him lowkey having telepathy and memory projection abilities, but him also using nightmare fuel while wielding his magic and his illusions also more than often being intangible, I gave Gus ghost as a secondary type, which is especially true for Gus's clones)

Viney - Fairy - (her ability to heal and tame wild animals along with her desire to protect them screams fairy type to me. I was considering giving her secondary typing, but considering Granbull and Snubull are pure fairy types while looking fierce, I decided Viney would just be a singular fairy type)

Boscha - Fire/Poison - (Boscha overall has a lot of fire moves along with being in potion track and even as a person Boscha is both fierce and toxic, so this typing is perfect for her)

Bria - Rock/Fighting - (Rocks are Bria's primary weapon and she also wields a sword and priorities physical strength so I also gave her a fighting type for good measure)

Emira Blight - Psychic/Fairy - (psychic type for her illusion casting and her level-headedness, fairy type for both her healing, compassion, and mischievousness along with her charm)

Edric Blight - Psychic/Fire - (psychic type for his illusions and intelligence (even if he can be an airhead at times, the boy's still clever) and fire type for his chaotic nature while wielding a bunch of explosives)

Matt Tholomule - Rock/Dark - (rock type for construction type and dark type that stands for how shady Matt can be at times along with his illusions that are used for deception. I didn't give either Blight Twins or Gus dark-type for their illusions as they're hardly mean-spirited in general so an "Evil" type wouldn't fit them)

Skara - Normal/Electric ( her sound attacks are hardly anything extraordinary. Electric stands for her thunderstorm and whether or not some of her sound-based abilities have the power of electricity within them)

Gavin Deamonne - Ground (Gavin uses very straight-forward abomination magic and his abominations seem to act like they're made out of clay which is even closer to earth)

Barcus - Psychic/Ghost (I committed any poison-typing for Carcus as hardly he uses liquids in his spells and his powers are so mind and spirit-like focused, I might as well give Barcus the same typing Gus has)

Jerbo - Ground/Grass (Jerbo's animations are clearly made out of the soil and he still utilises plant magic)

Angmar - Grass/Bug (Anfmar's primary magic is the plant one, but he also affinity for befriending bugs, specifically butterflies)

If you want to add anything or discuss this let me know

[orphiclovers]

Rereading early ORV and I have some THOUGHTS on Kim Dokja. In typical me fashion, they are unpopular. So if he's your absolute favourite character and seeing him be criticized will ruin your day, maybe skip this post, ok? Peace.

-

What is so novel and interesting about Kim Dokja is that he GENUINELY doesn't really have a knee jerk emotional reaction of outrage and empathy when seeing injustice happen. He sees something immoral and bad, but doesn't FEEL horrified and disgusted. Emotions don't drive him to attempt to fix the situation or save anyone.

Instead his moral compass is based on the simple logic that 'bad things happening should be prevented if there is an opportunity to prevent them.'

This philosophy is the most apparent in his actions in Chungmuro on the WHOLE, with the food and marginalized group and etc. But I will point out this moment in particular as an example of what I mean.

They see women be driven to prostitution to survive. Jung Heewon has an instinctive, human reaction of outrage and disgust, wants to rush in and save them and damn the consequences, while Kim Dokja is calm and rational, holding her back and saying those woman will starve if they try to help right now.

This lack of empathy (feeling strong emotions) is definitely due to childhood trauma stunting his emotional development but... that doesn't change the fact this is a legitimate part of his personality now.

Usually, when a character is 'cold and ruthless', it's because they are repressing their true feelings and forcing themselves to be unfeeling for some goal. Like Yoo Joonghyuk, for example.

But we are IN Kim Dokja's head and get to see the way he thinks, and being 'unfeelingly rational' IS what comes naturally to him.

Before you say anything, I know the Fourth Wall represses some of his emotions in certain situations and certainly helps him deal with pain and horror. But we are ALWAYS TOLD when it's active, and it isn't in these moments.

Blaming all of Kim Dokja's less than moral thoughts and behavior on the 4th wall even when there's no indication that it's influencing him at that particular moment, is not something I want to do as it feels like an attempt to scrub away his moral greyness. I choose to believe that his narration, in moments when he's not wrong or biased or 4th wall-ed, is a basically accurate representation of his character. I think the authors didn't make his narration totally 100% unreliable all the time, with no possible indication of where he's wrong or right. Because that would mean there is nothing a reader can latch onto and draw conclusions about KDJ from.

If they wanted to write about a faceless self insert with no concrete personality traits and flaws, a person you can headcanon to be anything, they wouldn't have written ORV.

I think it's okay to acknowledge Kim Dokja's first reaction to seeing a woman about to be raped is not 'oh my god...those bastards...! I have to stop this...!' but '...she might be dangerous or a hinderence in a future...'

We don't need to make excuses here and try to justify this. A moment later he catches himself thinking like this and 'shudders with disgust at himself.'

His first, instinctive thoughts that he can't control don't necessarily make him a bad person. What matters is his second thoughts and what he actually chooses to do, which he CAN control. I ALSO don't think he's wrong to feel disgusted at himself for having low empathy. His guilt is justified.

I genuinely like him even more for always picking the 'moral option' in every scenario now, than if he did it immediately with no hesitation. Because it makes empathy and compassion a constant choice he's making, and putting in the effort reflects well on what his values are.

Kim Dokja legitimately can't help but weigh everyone he meets on a scale of how 'useful they potenially are' first and foremost. He does this with strangers and also with all of kimcom too.

"Who should I save because they would be useful in the future? I wasn't Yoo Joonghyuk to be thinking about these things." At this point, chap 74, he thinks Yoo Joonghyuk is wrong and doesn't want to be like him at all and mostly calls him a psychopath. He thinks 'acting like him' is wrong and undesirable.

He has a mini arc about Yoo Joonghyuk later, goes from 'he's a bad person, I know it because I know everything about him' in chap 81 to 'maybe I don't know him at all' in chap 82 but this is before that.

Seeing people as tools and deciding who to save based on future knowledge is a thing BOTH of them do. Yet Kim Dokja critisizes Yoo Joonghyuk for it, it's his least favourite character trait that YJH of TWSA has.

And in typical Kim Dokja fashion, this similarity between them is exactly what he despises in Yoo Joonghyuk - but now we find out it's not because he finds it amoral ("I'm not a humanist" - he doesn't care about that part) but because he sees it as a mirror reflection of himself. He's projecting, as always!

In early ORV, he hates the part of Yoo Joonghyuk that is the most similar to himself. (even tho they're sort of the polar opposites too. Yoo Joonghyuk is a deeply emotionally driven person, he feels empathy and the desire to save everyone but chooses to repress and ignore this and act like a ruthless 'psychopath'. KDJ disagrees with this choice, as Kim Dokja IS an unfeeling psychopath (low empathy) but does his best to act like a decent person and not an edgelord.)

[perfectlysanexd]

I haven't done one of these kind of posts in a while, but the expressions in Rebirth were top notch, and I wanted to talk a bit about and analyze Sephiroth's different smiles, both pre and post Nibelheim.

Nibelheim itself is difficult to gauge, because SOLDIER Cloud is actually Zack, and furthermore, some of it is definitely his own wishful thinking. But one thing you can say for sure, is that they portray that Sephiroth, despite being so emotionally weary, still summons up the energy to smile at his friend.

As soon as he turns away from Zack, his smile falls, and he doesn't give one to the Mayor at all.

However, when he turns back to inform the men that they're free until sundown, he summons up another smile for them. I don't think that he's just attempting to keep their morale up, he genuinely has affection for Zack, and cares for the others. He respects them for their service, putting their lives on the line for what they think is a good cause, and Sephiroth—as we saw in Ever Crisis—learned to be a compassionate person, who cares about the lives of others, even enemies.

Of course, he's deeply distressed during this time, the despair is eating him alive. Even Cloud acknowledges(despite having not known Sephiroth on a personal level) that he just wasn't himself once they arrived. But I'm not going to talk about my theories on all the Jenova stuff right now, that's not the focus here. Even at the window, you can tell he's feeling off, but when he turns to Zack, he attempts to smile again.

Sephiroth has never enjoyed his fame, and as we learned in Ever Crisis, he didn't choose it; Shinra made up bogus achievements and declared him to be a hero before even his first field assignment, as part of their recruitment campaign. Can't argue with results, I guess—it certainly got Cloud to join up out of hero worship, right? In EC, Sephiroth admits that all he ever wanted was to be normal, something that he knows he can never have. How sad...

So when this man wants to take his picture, it's no wonder that he's over it by then, and tells him no. And rather politely, too, all things considered. But even before that, he smiles and tells Zack that as long as he does his job, their young tourguide will be safe.

But as soon as he turns his back and walks away? Yeah, that smile immediately fades.

Which certainly doesn't change when the guy takes his picture. But of course, when Zack asks Sephiroth to pose for one, he just can't say no, even though he's not super happy about it. Anyway, he continues to smile at Zack for the duration of their journey up Mt. Nibel, making an effort to talk and even cracking a couple jokes, just trying to be a good leader and keep them in good spirits.

And of course, there's the very sad bridge part, where you can tell that he's genuinely upset that he failed to save the other infantryman that got washed away. He searches for him, but comes up empty-handed. Still, he smiles for Zack and teases him about a performance assessment, since their morale is quite low now, but they need to keep going.

Honestly, the Nibelheim part of Rebirth really did an excellent job of portraying Sephiroth's inner struggle. For reference, there are only 3 points in Remake, I think, when Sephiroth drops his ever-present, sometimes affectionate(towards Cloud) and often unhinged, smile: First, it's replaced with sheer rage as he kills President Shinra.

Second time, is when Aerith has a Cetra moment and suggests that his entire existence is "wrong".

And the third time is when he holds out his hand to Cloud at the Edge of Creation, and is rejected by him.

Anyway, back to Rebirth. Ignoring the bizarre smiles he showed us as Nibelheim was burning, as if he was in a trance and just not all there(that's a subject for a different chat), post-Nibelheim Sephiroth's smiles are interesting, too, if we consider what kind they are, depending on who he's dealing with.

For people he hates, like Tseng, it's much more unhinged looking, and very cold. You can tell there's a certain measure of satisfaction from shanking him, haha...

For someone like Aerith, who...I wouldn't exactly say that he hates her, but she's definitely in the way. I would almost say that he considers her to be actively preventing Cloud from recovering his true memories, leading him to remain as merely Sephiroth's "puppet", but that's a theory for another day. He looks at her coldly, as well, but it's a bit different. There's a bit more respect there than there was for Tseng.

And then there's Zack. Actual Zack. I feel like, deep down, he still cares about him, and has no intention of killing him. I almost sense a little...regret? Maybe? Hm. It's definitely a bit warmer of a smile. And of course, although he had many opportunities to get rid of Zack, he doesn't. Instead, he sends him off into the space between worlds safely.

And of course, last but certainly not least, is the way he smiles at Cloud. I know, I know. "But Sane, you like sefikura, so you're biased!" Look, I won't deny that. However, when you really look at it and compare his smiles, which is what this is all about, his truest smiles are always saved for Cloud. He has 2 different "flavors": pure affection and cruel affection. (There are also a few pity smiles, I think.) The former is used most of the time, whenever Cloud is in his sight, and the latter is used during moments when he's trying to control/influence him. I would almost say that he's...satisfied, yet regretful at the same time?? Like these:

And now, let's contrast that with his more genuine, affectionate smiles for Cloud... (The first shot here ⬇ can be contrasted with the shot 2 up from the bottom there ⬆, as the one above is when he's calling Cloud his puppet, and the one below is when Cloud goes to attack him and he opens his arms wider for the incoming uh...embrace.)

Remake had many interesting smiles from him, too, but that will have to be a different post, as this already has 30 screenshots. Anywho, you're free to draw your own conclusions, and not everyone reads faces in the same way, so maybe I'm nuts. Who knows? Either way, I hope you enjoyed this random, indulgent, very long post, haha. If you made it to the end, you're awesome. 💕

All screenshots were taken by me on my PS5. I won't ask for credit on them, since literally anyone can take an identical shot if they pause at the right second. (The exception are the 3 Remake shots, which were taken on PC with mods and the freecam. For those, I would appreciate credit if you use them anywhere, since I don't watermark them.)

[sl-vega]

01; we need to stop meeting like this

project: love liason! - a scaramouche smau

Getting out of your seat and walking towards Ms. Lisa's desk after everyone left to minimize potential embarrassment, you quickly claimed your phone and gave a quick, curt, apology before quickly running out the door and being met with Lyney's signature teasing grin.

"Don't start."

"Never did."

Lynette shortly followed, tapping his shoulder signifying that they were going to head to their next class together and you waved a temporary goodbye to the both of them before heading to your own locker.

184, 184, 184....

You chanted like a mantra in your head as you scoured the hallway for your locker, you knew where it was, it was just a bit hard to adjust to the new location.

A little while after searching for a bit, you finally managed to make your way over to your new designated locker. A bright pink post it note stuck onto the bland metal door with your last name written on it with bold sharpie to avoid confusion.

You plucked of the piece of paper off the door and slipped a few of your textbooks in plus a few binders, you were about to continue organizing before a tap on your shoulder interrupted your cleaning time.

"Could you move a bit?"

Vibrant violet eyes met your's and for a second you were lost for words. The boy didn't look familiar, maybe he was a transfer student?

"Oh, sorry, my bad."

You nervously shifted to the side a bit so the peculiar stranger could access his own locker.

Curiosity had gotten to you and you were about to ask for his name, but then he was promptly tackled by Venti, who's name you only knew because he was very adamant on getting you to join band in sophomore year.

"Scara!"

"Venti- Do that again and I will kill you-"

Didn't seem like the most sociable type, maybe keeping your distance was for the best.

Other than the encounter with your new locker mate, nothing else during the day was notable.

...is what you would have said if he wasn't everywhere you went.

Second, third, fourth period, if you can count it, he was right there.

And your school was pretty big, so chances of having him in every single one of your classes were low.

But lo and behold some omnipotent being seemed to rig the system and just pelted this random kid face first into your life.

He seemed to catch on to it as well, but never actually mentioned anything, nor even talked to you either.

Your first first official conversation took place during an assembly at the end of the day to celebrate the start of the new school year, and to welcome the freshmen (that Furina still held a vehement disdain for.)

When the afternoon announcement came on calling down each of the grades, year by year, to head to the auditorium, you found yourself shoulder-to-shoulder with said boy as everyone else seemed to be shoving their way forward to find their friends.

Which you would have also been doing too, if you weren't already completely drained by now.

(Seriously Mr. Zhongli, homework on the first day? Who do you think you are?)

You turned your gaze to your 'new' classmate next to you, who was still mindlessly moving ahead like the rest of your class whilst scrolling on his phone.

Maybe you should try and strike up a conversation with him? Maybe he isn't a big fan of social interactions, but getting on his good side would certainly be convenient seeing as how much you would have to see him throughout the school year.

Hi! My name is (Y/N), what's your's?

You were nearing the entrance of the auditorium and you couldn't spot any of your friends yet, so maybe it kind of was a last ditch effort on your part, but it couldn't hurt.

Steeling your resolve as your class finally stepped foot into the large room, you properly turned to look at the boy and got your introduction ready in your head.

"Hey-"

"Scara! There you are!"

Suddenly, a significantly taller figure tackled the other boy into a hug, interrupting your valiant effort to befriend the strange boy.

"Childe you're gonna choke me someday."

"You don't see more for the whole day and I don't even get a 'hi'? You're heartless man."

Suddenly Childe, (who you now only realized was Childe) turned to you this time, and your heart seemed to give out on you in that very moment.

"Oh, hey (Y/N)! I didn't know you two knew each other-"

"We don't-"

"-Don't mind him he's just going through a phase. Wanna sit with us?"

Wait- Wait what?! Did he just- There's no way it was that easy-

"I'd love to-"

"(Y/N)! We were looking for you!"

You heard Lyney yell from a few seats away, Chlorinde was also with your friends, next to Navia, she offered you a quick and polite smile and wave. Furina was patting a seat in between her and Navia, Mona was on her phone before greeting you. And Lynette mouthed 'I'm so sorry' from her seat next to Lyney because she was the only one who seemed to realize how shit her brother's timing was.

"Well, looks like you found your friends, I'll see you around yeah?"

You just nodded and muttered a soft 'Yeah, totally..." as the boy walked away with his arm slinged around his friend's shoulder presumably chatting his ear off.

You walked towards your friends, waving at the other girls before glaring at Lyney, who's shoulder was promptly swatted by Lynette.

"Fucking dumbass she was this close to getting one-on-one time with Childe!"

You slumped into your seat as you sighed.

Fate really did hate you huh?

additional notes:

when idk how to make the slowburn slower, I just make one of the friends the scape goat

no see if lyney let them sit together the whole plot wouldn't have happened

(it is a canon event I fear)

lyney no.1 scarayn fan trust

also look at me go with the consistent uploads

𝜗𝜚 SYNOPSIS: you're head over heels in love with childe, and scaramouche is (begrudingly) smitten with his "rival" mona. and, by sheer divine coincidence, you both happen to be the best friends of each other's objects of affection, so you strike a deal with each other. if scaramouche helps you ask out childe, you'll set him up with mona. so with the annual spring formal right around the corner, the two of you vow to be each other's wingmans so you can end your junior year on a high note (and maybe even kick off your senior year with a new relationship!). between, scheming, planning, and researching, you and scaramouche find yourselves developing a new relationship via helping each other out. now the real question is whether this friendship will remain as a pure platonic bond, or blossom into something more?

<PREV ll MASTERLIST ll NEXT>

🎀 - taglist!;

@agaygothicmushroom @035814 @freyao7, @sketcheeee @tsukimara @shyentsmissingink @justpeachyteastea @aries-afk @lxkeeeee @sakiimeo @sugxryratz @shutingstar @lalaloveallmydays @bellflower1257 @haruumei @kichiyosh1 @littlemisssatanist @dee-zbignuts @candyescapism @crimxeorcremeexistspeacefully @princess-peachy @franaby @jllyfsh-lvr @heusalettle

[coralinnii]

I love the villain scorned by the world feat: Malleus genre: drama, hurt/comfort, romance note: part 3 continuation of Being Reincarnated into a New World as the Bad Guy AU Malleus ver, not gender specific reader, no pronouns used, villain/ess!reader is human, insecure villain/ess!reader, use of non-canon characters, 1.6k word count

I'm scared that people aren't gonna like how the villain/ess!reader is portrayed but I wanted to write people who are hurt and are afraid, cuz that's what being alive is like, to sometimes be afraid. So, hope you enjoy!

There are requests with more specific topics or aspects of the story so they may get their own story post. I'm not ignoring you, I'm more story pacing ^^"

In one night alone, you’ve met your ex-fiancé and your former friends while you were with the fae that has asked to marry you. Then, said fae went on to antagonize your ex-fiancé who was a prince and low-key threatened to ruin him, his lover and those who supported the couple. 

You were not built for this stress

In his defense, Malleus only did it because your former fiance started to mock you and your family over a crime that was proven false. You certainly weren’t ungrateful enough not to thank Malleus for his assistance. The powerful king simply smiled.

“This is but a mere glimpse of the things I would do for you, should you finally accept my proposal” 

“T-this is not a decision you can rush” 

You were hesitant and gave excuses to refuse the dragon king but he made efforts to rebuke your reasons one by one, destroying whatever obstacles that kept you from saying yes. Soon, it came down to one reason, your real reason. 

You were scared

Not of Malleus, he has never done anything to warrant fear from you. But rather, his status as a “route target”. 

Before the arrival of the heroine, you were friends with the other route targets and even felt happy enough to be engaged with the prince despite having only platonic feelings between each other. But the moment they all met her, your world became hers. 

Your former fiancé grew irritated with you, then full out ignoring you. It was no better with the others as well when you expressed your worries to your mutual friends. Rather than consoling you or hearing you out, they took the heroine’s side and started ignoring you as well, calling you delusional and unreasonable. 

Everyone changed (or perhaps you changed and this was how it was meant to be) and you were left ridiculed and soon villainized by those you felt close to. The look of disgust on their faces whenever you attempted to just speak to them, it hurt you.

Would Malleus be the same? Be kind to you then break your heart when the heroine comes in? You suffered because of it the first time but if it was Malleus…your last and maybe closest person in your life since reincarnating to this world… you don’t know how you could come back from that. 

So you started to give up on your happy ending, refusing to answer Malleus’ proposal, avoiding to engage with the heroine at all, even escaping the party and retreating to your old hiding spot… in the royal garden. 

Alone with your thoughts, you berated yourself over your cowardice as you hid in the tall rose bushes. Gently, you fidgeted with the rose petals and you reminisced about the past. You met Malleus here, didn’t you? 

You were so clueless over your future. Back then, you still held hope that your fate was not predestined, that you could be content with stepping aside for the heroine and live happily with them. Yet despite your conflicted feelings, you managed a smile as you recalled one fateful night in the garden. It was the night that you met with your closest friend… 

“Lord Malleus!” 

…Did you say that out loud? 

You looked around in confusion to see if you were truly alone as you thought and to your surprise, you saw beyond the tall hedges the very fae you were just thinking about and the person who called him…

The female protagonist. 

“Do you like flowers, Lord Malleus?”

Your heart clenched painfully as you saw your worst nightmare come to be, the female lead with your friend(?) and they were alone in the gardens, where you realized where the player was supposed to meet Malleus in order to enter his route. Was the baron’s daughter aware of this? Did they meet like it was meant to be? Should you stay…or run away? 

You could. Your engagement has been annulled and your family was cleared from accusations of treason. You haven't accepted Malleus' proposal so nothing is holding you or your family back from leaving this kingdom forever and starting a new life away from here. No need to follow this cursed story to the end. No need to ever see your ex-friends or the protagonist ever again. 

No need to see Malleus again. 

Just run away.  

Malleus internally thanked the elders and Lilia for their lessons to conceal his emotions, or he could have done something as drastic as burning this garden to ashes due to the annoyance he felt at this moment. He noticed your escape from the party and assumed you wanted some fresh air so he left you on your own. But soon, the party attendees bore him and he soon ached to be by your side once more. So, he made his way to the one place he immediately thought of when thinking of you, the royal gardens. 

It was his curiosity borne from boredom that brought him to the gardens that day. He found himself attracted with your kindness and obliviousness to his true identity. He found you charming, a delight and later an optimist when learning of your situation. He knew right away who you were, the child from a noble family betrothed to the young prince of this kingdom since young but that piece of information did not bother him…at first. 

But you were turned from charming to tempting as time went on. He craved your attention, envisioning your smiling face with each letter he received from you via his attendant Lilia. He couldn’t count how many times he wanted to visit you personally but couldn’t. He was sure that if you knew his identity, you may cease your correspondence with him in fear of a scandal between the kingdoms. He at least could appreciate your tactfulness. 

But he was greedy as any dragon fae would be once he heard your engagement was annulled. He may curse the foolish prince for his actions but Malleus suppose he should count himself lucky that your ex-fiancé was a fool. If he were a decent man then he may have to declare war by stealing you away. 

But Malleus encountered another greedy individual, and she’s standing right in front of him. 

“Do you like flowers, Lord Malleus?” The baron’s daughter asked, fluttering her eyelashes cutely. 

“This garden and its flora has its charm” Malleus curtly replied, he can’t hate this garden afterall. He met you here. 

“So do I! I guess fae and humans aren’t so different, huh” 

Well, that’s a stretch of a comment. He couldn’t comprehend this human’s agenda. Constantly surrounded by young men, Malleus assumed she had better ways to spend her time, and not waste his. 

Wait…was she reaching her hand to him? 

“My wish is for humans and fae to get along. Wouldn’t that be great?” The female lead sweetly said with her best smile, stretching her fingers to reach for Malleus’ crossed arms. 

To dare attempt to lay hands on him without his permission. No one would fault him for burning this woman’s audacious hands off, right? 

“King Malleus!” 

The dragon fae’s pointed ears perked up at the sound of his name. He turned immediately to the source, knowing exactly who just called him. 

“My dear human” he responded back with a smile as he saw you walking quickly towards him. 

In spite of your nervousness, you walked up to the duo and looked to share a gaze with the tall dragon fae before cautiously moving to hover your hand on his arm. Malleus did you one better and guided your hand to firmly rest on his arm, with his large hand kept over yours. 

“Good evening, lady” you nodded your head at the heroine who seemed displeased with your presence but curtsied back, as is custom. You barely gave the woman’s much of your attention (your confidence may waver if you did) and turned directly to face Malleus.

“King Malleus, I had planned to retire early tonight and leave this party” you looked to Malleus, taking a deep breath before speaking once more. To let yourself be selfish and fight for the only man that mattered to you now. “Would you like to leave…with me?”   

“Aren’t you being rude?” The female lead argued, barely hiding her annoyance with you. “Not only did you interrupt a conversation, you’re shamelessly asking Lord Malleus to leave-“ 

“Where would you like to go, my dear human?” Malleus’ deep voice interrupted the baron’s daughter, not that Malleus cared as his striking green eyes focused solely on you. 

“If you’re willing…perhaps your manor’s garden?” You shocked yourself with your boldness, but you kept at it. “I much prefer your garden above all others, especially during our dates” 

Whoosh

Your senses couldn’t keep up with the sudden shift as you were suddenly lifted by Malleus who quickly scooped you up into a bridal carry. You and the female lead both had looks of shock by the fae king’s sudden actions but Malleus paid attention to only one of you.

“I had made the false assumption that all humans were charming” Malleus’ eyes glinted a bright green, you compared them to gems, as he smirked amusingly at you, his fangs peeking from his lips. “But only you could evoke such feelings of greed within me"

Ignoring this world's protagonist, Malleus began to shroud the two of you in specks of green lights, a sign that you were going to be magically whisked away at Malleus' whim.

But before you did, you managed to meet the female lead's eyes which were filled with nothing but indignant rage. She looked ready to destroy you and everything you love, but you steeled yourself. Instead of flinching under her glare, you smiled at her while wrapping your arms around the dragon king's neck. Without a word, you made your decision.

I'm not giving him up

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

Hi hi, gendery sex question here.

Me and my partner are afab, and basically despite her efforts, sex hasnt felt like much for me. But I love being the giving partner, and for a while now have thought Id enjoy sex with her if I had a penis. Imagining that sensation instead is exciting. I consider myself nonbinary. Im mostly wondering if your expert opinion thinks my low success at feeling much actual physical pleasure might be caused by feeling alienated from my body in this maybe dysphoric way. Or is there's another reason I should consider why sex with my partner doesnt work great for me. Masturbation goes a little better and I can actually finish, but not great and only upside down and without looking at my body. Generally high drive with low success has been leaving me frustrated. Do I need to think about phalloplasty?? That's kind of A Lot especially since Ive never considered myself transmasc per se.

Also thanks. Your posts and attitude mean a lot to me as someone who had to figure out a lot of shit on my own as a kid and subsequently became the defacto Sex Knower for a lot of friends to go to with questions. Ive seen how much this stuff helps people feel less broken. You're doing amazing. 💚

hi anon,

I certainly can't put a name on your gender identity for you, but what I can tell you is that it's VERY common for people with some kind of dysphoria to feel alienated or distant from sex because the highly intimate nature of sex and the very gendered assumptions still tied to many people's genitalia. many people who have transitioned in some way find that sex becomes MUCH for fun and comfortable afterwards, regardless of whether they have surgery or hormone replacement therapy - sometimes, just being out and perceived differently by partners can be enough.

if you haven't already, it may be helpful to try sex with a strap on. it's much less permanent and expensive than phalloplasty, and can give you a sense of whether you like the sensation of having sex that way. if you enjoy that, you may also want to try out a packer to see whether or not you enjoy the sensation of having a penis outside of a sexual context. no need to commit hard to anything right away; you have all the room in the world to experiment.

I'd also add, gently, that wanting a penis doesn't have to make you transmasculine if that's not how you want to understand it. if we believe that genitals are not gendered, then wanting or having a penis doesn't have to say anything about you except that you want a dick. parts is just parts.

[yukidragon]

Sunny Day Jack - An Ugly Toad's Transformation into a Prince

You know, after my what if scenario about Ian going to generic-off-brand-reddit for advice about his cheating, an element about it stuck in my mind. Specifically it was the part where Ian felt guilt for "subjecting" Alice to his sexual desires despite her being a willing participant.

It got me thinking about the possible reasons why Ian cheated. I mentioned his low self-esteem in that post as a big factor in why it happened. I suspect it might even have been the primary reason at the root of everything, and why he wound up distancing himself from MC after moving away, even though they were in a relationship.

It could be, regardless of MC's personality and reassurances, Ian's self-esteem was so low, he was convinced that they were far too good for him. In fact, being with him was almost like a punishment, something awful inflicted on others that left them as suffering victims afterwards.

We've seen plenty of hints in teaser images after all - Ian being mocked mercilessly for just wanting to be friends, assuming MC wouldn't want to date him, just settling for a relationship if he can't make something of himself... Plus there's the clear low self-esteem we've seen in the demo, both in his phone calls and in the afterlife story. Not to mention the emotional abuse his mother put him through to make him believe that his feelings and thoughts were sinful.

If every single person Ian tried to make friends with rejected him, made him feel ugly, like being around him was the absolute worst... that'd do something to a guy. Only MC seemed to see beauty in him before he transferred schools. He certainly didn't get along with Shaun either. I mean, having that strong "ewwwww" reaction to seeing him half-naked probably didn't help Ian's confidence all that much. Overall, Shaun seemed to struggle to hide his distaste for Ian, and I can imagine Ian would pick up on that.

For Ian, MC would be the exception to the rule that the world is telling him - he's ugly, gross, sinful, and not worthy of love.

Then Ian gets thrown into a new place without MC's support. This is a place that don't know him or his past at all. Surprisingly, he's not rejected there. He makes friends. Maybe he attributes it to getting a makeover. He changes his appearance drastically, focusing on his appearance much more. He makes an effort to change for the better. He makes himself "worthy" of love while there, and people respond positively to that change. By changing who he is in order to conform to what he believes is beautiful, he finally gets the approval of someone who doesn't have to settle for the old him.

In a way, it could be seen as a mercy. Sure, Ian gets caught up in his new friends, his new attractiveness and the excitement of being accepted, but a part of it could be feeling like he shouldn't "bother" MC. They put up with so much from him over the years. After all, they had to deal with the old, ugly him most of their life.

Talking with MC can also remind Ian of who he used to be - that ugly person people were forced to tolerate, who was more of a disgusting punishment than a welcome presence. In this new place, he got a fresh start with people who don't know who he used to be. He can mold himself into someone new, someone acceptable, someone people want. Sure it means forcing himself to socialize more than he's comfortable with. Sure it means changing himself completely, but that's clearly for the best. It's what society wants. It's what will change him from someone unworthy to someone he can actually be proud of for once in his life.

Ian doesn't want to go back to being who he used to be. He doesn't want to lose his acceptance. He makes excuses when he misses MC, convincing himself that they're better off not hearing from him as much, probably even happier without him constantly there weighing them down. He loses himself in this new "beautiful" person he's become, accepted and adored by far more people than he ever dreamed.

Ian never allowed himself to find others attractive because they would never find him attractive, in his mind. He rejected other people preemptively besides MC in his mind before they could reject him as another way to defend himself. Now... they accept him. Now they're not something to be wary of, and he can finally notice that they are actually as attractive as his fictional husbandos, waifus, and spousus from all the anime and video games he used to indulge in. He's too busy for fantasies now when he has the real thing.

It's a slippery slope, letting discomfort and things slide in order to finally get that approval Ian has desperately craved all his life. It's addictive, these sparks of approval even if part of him feels guilty. He doesn't have to settle for someone who can "see past" his "hideous" appearance. He doesn't have to subject them to tolerating a version of him that is unworthy. He can finally be happy.

But damn if Ian isn't so lonely. He's always masking, being this person others approve of, afraid of showing the real geeky person underneath. He hides his love of anime and games. He drinks more, parties more, gets into the more socially acceptable trends. The party scene is rough, but he's learned how to deal with it. He's got people to guide him on his path to stardom and modeling, how to present himself in an appealing way. He is told by his teachers, an agent, producers, and peers what's acceptable and what's not, even if it's taxing on him.

As much as Ian doesn't want to look back to who he used to be, he craves that deeper connection with someone. He tries to find it in his new friends - acceptance without the baggage or memories of who he used to be. It leads to lines being crossed, things he questions are right... but he fears losing what he has now more than the doubts gnawing at the back of his mind.

Ian can't go back to being that ugly and unwanted person he used to be.

It's only when Ian does something that he can't make excuses for, something so unforgivable that shakes him to his core, that he finally realizes that he's lost himself along the way. It's why he immediately calls MC in tears, broken by what he himself just did. His first instinct is to run back to his safe space, the one person who accepted him unconditionally at his worst, when everyone else rejected him. Unfortunately he knows that what he did would hurt the one person he didn't want to suffer because of him most of all.

Ian is at his lowest point in this moment. He has everything now in this place, but he feels even more vile and unlovable after doing as inexcusable as cheat on his partner.

So when MC breaks up with Ian, he can't accept it. The one person who accepted him even at his worst finally rejected him... and it's all his fault. He can't blame this on societal beauty standards or people being jerks... this is all on him.

Ian is forced to face himself now, both who he was and who he had become. The person he became won so much approval, got on the fast track to stardom and became a model. It's something he can't give up. He can't go back to who he used to be... but in the process he sacrificed the one good thing from his old life that once meant the entire world to him.

The only thing Ian is do is beg and spend the rest of his life making it up to MC. He has to fix this mistake, even though he knows it's unforgivable. It's the only way he can live with himself. He can still keep the person he is now, but just carve away the bad parts. He did it before when he moved there, and he can do it again. MC is the only thing worth keeping from his old life. He can just combine that one good thing from his old life to his new, superior life. He can do better. He has to. He made himself better once - he can do it again. There's still hope!

Ian can't go back to being that ugly reject... and he can't handle being a sinner. He needs to be absolved of his sin by the only person who can forgive him... and he needs the approval of the world that he so desperately fought to attain.

While this might not be the emotional journey Ian winds up taking in the final game, it certainly is part of his struggle for Sunshine in Hell. Ian is in the wrong, and he will be the first to admit it. His relationship with Alice was toxic, but he's not a bad person. He never wanted to hurt her, even if he didn't think about her wants, needs, and feelings as much as he should have.

Of course, Alice forgiving Ian, but still ending things just adds an extra complication to his tangled up emotions. It doesn't feel like forgiveness to him, true forgiveness if she's shutting him out. He has to make things right between them. He can't lose the one person who saw the ugliest sides of him and still told him that he was beautiful.

No one else could ever do that for him. Now... no one ever would again.

To Ian, Alice was the only person who could see past his flaws, and he is the only one that can see past hers. Who else would love her if not him? She needs him just as badly as he needs her. He just has to make it up to her so that they both don't have to suffer alone because of the stupid mistakes he made.

Unfortunately Ian never realized that Alice never saw his looks as something to overlook in the first place. She always found him adorable, precious, and lovable. He just could never see that in himself. He still can't see that person he used to be as beautiful.

Ian is a flawed man suffering from traumas and mental issues who desperately needs help from a therapist, and maybe medication. He needs better cooping techniques and to learn how to better balance his desires in a healthy way. It's tragic that he winds up causing so much damage to himself and his partner while on this twisting path to become a version of himself, a version of himself that isn't a punishment to be subjected onto others.

@channydraws @earthgirlaesthetic @sai-of-the-7-stars @cheriihoney @illary-kore @okamiliqueur @kurokrisps

[vgperson]

What Did I Do In 2023?

Whatever I wanted, mostly.

----

As I mentioned last year, my site now has an RSS feed with basically everything I've done back to 2020, so this will mainly be going over the same stuff from that, just with added context.

In January, I finally sat down and properly realized an idea for a short story I'd had sitting around for a while: From the Sidelines, about a fantasy RPG expedition going sideways. I remain very proud of it in both concept and execution, and hope people read it.

In February, Your Turn To Die was released on Steam Early Access, receiving character profiles and some bonus mini-episodes, adding two more later in the year.

After finishing From the Sidelines, I carried that momentum to revisit my Ut0p1a story series about funny computer animals. I'd always meant to continue it - and conclude it - but hadn't been satisfied with the ideas I had for it until totally rethinking them this year. In March, I posted the remaining stories one after another: Right to Code and Left to Code. I'm very proud of these as well. Also in March, Kenshi Yonezu released LADY. (Video, interview)

In April, Uri released the Data Book of the Strange Men Series, a big collection of the writing she's done on the games in the series, with a lot of new parts as well, all translated by me.

Then in May... uh, well, let's see. In April, Capcom released the Mega Man Battle Network Legacy Collection. I always adored the Battle Network games, and was initially excited that they finally did the thing... but by the time it came out, I was pretty disappointed by how, while you certainly couldn't call them low-effort ports, the effort didn't extend everywhere I thought it should, with the biggest offenders being the total absence of any "convenience features" except Buster Max Mode, the bad font, and the almost entirely untouched translations.

So, I ended up deciding I might as well just replay the originals, and that was a fun time (aside from the parts that were bad). Doing this, I couldn't help but notice how... turbulent the translations were, even if I'd always known they were less than ideal. I mean, the first two games just used periods for ellipses despite the tight character limits, then in BN3 they had an ellipsis character... but it's center-aligned, Japanese-style? Aside from the intro, which has normal ones? Gosh, somebody should fix that - it's simple enough to find and edit in YY-CHR. "JapanMan" is silly, too - I wonder if anybody made a patch for that? Wait, what do you mean there's just a tool to extract and insert text in all the Battle Network games including the Legacy Collection???

Thus began a journey that sort of occupied the rest of my year. First I did the BN3 Translation Revision, trying not to worry too much about cross-referencing the Japanese text unless something seemed wrong, so that I didn't spend too long on the project. Then I began to consider BN2, with its unfortunate "foreigner" text that would need some more significant reworking. I established more convenient tools for comparing with the Japanese script, and thus did a much more thorough job with it, releasing the BN2 Translation Revision in June (AKA Princess Pride Month).

Finally, after giving myself time to recover and actually finish replaying the series, I knew what I had to do to close things out. With the BN4 Translation Revision, you can finally play Battle Network 4 with a translation that isn't such a mess. Whether you'd want to is for you to decide, though if you can get over the structure, I don't think it's the worst game in the series by any means. (Oh, and in December I also updated the BN3 Revision to 1.1, doing a thorough pass with the methods I'd honed. But I think I'm pretty much good on MMBN translations now.)

Anyway, backtracking to other things that happened during my Battle Network haze... June had Kenshi Yonezu's Moongazing (video, interview), and July had Globe (video, interview, interview).

Last but not least, released in November, I translated Refind Self: The Personality Test Game, a short game from Lizardry (creator of 7 Days to End with You) with a fun concept.

----

Obviously I was right to have said "no promises" last year. But really, Your Turn To Die should get its final part on Steam sometime next year, maybe even early-ish in it. That's certainly the goal.

I'm also hoping to buckle down and finish one of my own games, but as usual, who knows how that'll pan out. Letting my whims carry me this year let me finally finish From the Sidelines and Ut0p1a, which was great, and it also led me down a Battle Network rabbit hole, which was... fine, but definitely for a narrower audience. I'd always like to get back to more free game translations and the like, too, but it takes effort to find things I'd want to translate. For now, I think my increasing desire to be able to let loose some of these original games I've been planning, and the stories in them, might come out on top.

[luckthebard]

So a few thoughts on C3E51, and narrative and encounter design. First off - I loved the episode and thought it was incredibly exciting and engaging and a fun gameplay time. But to engage with a few of the criticism points I'm seeing, I will also say:

At this point I'm assuming the encounter was always planned to end with some version of the outcome we ended up with. Is that railroading? Sure, I guess, but it's also pretty standard D&D encounter design. The "win condition" here wasn't stopping Ludinus entirely, but rather to what degree they could mess up and stall his plans through sabotage. And frankly, I think they actually did pretty well! They destroyed the key in the Feywild and some of the batteries here, and it seems like Ludinus's plan did not go perfectly for him; so I imagine now they have time to react to a very slow and imperfect version of what he was trying to unleash. And that is the next narrative beat we had to get to in order to continue the story.

I know they rolled very low this encounter and many things did go wrong but even with that I came out of the episode thinking of this great quote from Star Trek: "It is possible to commit no mistakes and still lose. That is not a weakness; that is life." And that's sometimes an important story beat to hit! It certainly propelled Vox Machina forward after the fall of Emon, and the Apogee Solstice events seem to be performing a similar narrative role for Bells Hells.

To back up my interpretation here, there are a few things Matt did as a DM to signal that a failure here was not an Ultimate Failure and the point moving forward would be reacting to something fixable. The first was Ludinus's reaction to the machine breaking and his quickly covered up fear and uncertainty - he's trying to convince himself he "won" by the end but not as confident as he could be. The second is the fact that Matt took a lot of pains to point out in detail that team Orym, Laudna, Ashton could still see the beam of red shooting up into the sky at Ruidus. The moon prison hasn't been broken, it is breaking, and their efforts likely determined how badly and how much time they have to address it.

Anyway, wanted to push back against the "the encounter was unfair" or "railroading is bad" I've been seeing - the encounter was the encounter and served its purpose, and I recommend highly listening to Matt, Brennan, and Aabria talk about "railroading" in their GM roundtable to get a sense of it as a neutral rather than negative game design strategy.

There's a part 2 to this post but it was also long so it's HERE

[asksythe]

FGO Fes 2024 "CHALDEA Treasure Hunting" Experience Video - Introduction Section (Earphones recommended / Low volume recommended) Original Video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8dElTAHf0m0

Disclaimer: the translation is rushed, so there's probably room for improvement. I'm just posting this here for personal keeping since similar videos have been taken down from Youtube in the past.

Note: The context for this part of the event storyline is that Ritsuka is sent on a treasure hunt for a lost Holy Grail (as it goes) by Goredorf. She gets to choose one among several servants (Aesclepius, Takasugi, Tiamat, etc...) to go with her. Only one though. This video is the introduction section with Goredorf. Yes, it is very otome game-esque. 😁

I plan to (pester and rope my husband into helping me) translate the other sections, too, eventually. And then link them all back to this introduction video.

--TRANSLATION--

My! You have come a long way here.

This is Chaldea Base on the far end of the Chaldea Pavilion. As the one most responsible for the Chaldea Pavilion, I am unifying it into one! Chaldea Pavilion’s crown jewel is our Technical Advisor’s specially crafted Holy Grail! This Grail is the fruit of our advisor’s efforts in giving it polish!

I’d like as many people as possible to enjoy it while they can!

Witnessing that grail is the number one reason why you came here. Naturally, your selection is due to my good graces as the caretaker… You can be grateful and I accept your respect and admiration. If you encounter any troubles then you should forward your complaints not to me, but rather to management. Got it?

With that, let’s take a look shall we!

We’re still organizing the preparations..

Just a little..bit..more..

Which one…Now where did I put that thing…?

Uh? Oh?

How can there be nothing here? No way! It was here just a minute ago!!!

Oh oh oh…this is this is bad!

I’m going to disappoint the Technical Advisor so much!

There’s no way around this…

Think man, think! And frickin DO SOMETHING already, Goredolf!!

…Ugh.

Oh right! Oh right! Oh yes, that’s right!

You!

You! You!

How about it? How about taking on a little job for me? “The Search for the Holy Grail!” sound good to you?

The highest caretaker must attend to his tasks here you see. He can’t be reckless and go outside.

If you please, knowing the magical powers of our Technical Advisor, you should be able to sketch out its whereabouts. And wouldn’t that be splendid news!

For the sake of the exhibition hall of our “Chaldea Pavilion” I have assembled the greatest class to find all of these treasures.

Our Chaldea Treasure Hunting Unit will aid you in finding our booty!

I did have in mind for you to help me with preparations on this end, but these are grave and unavoidable circumstances.

The Servants will be standing by at their respective locations outside of here. You must go out and call for them. They will certainly aid you on your journey.

So get ready and get out there!

I wish you happy hunting! (Lit. Praying for good health)

[rose-vybe]

SUNSET

Hello everyone! Here's another shortfic based on a Tumblr prompt from @starsmadeinheaven . My muse likes these short things as of late and even though I've made a series on AO3, it seems they're kinda too short so I'll be posting here mainly.

“I wonder, am I truly safe here?” Carriedo asked with a casual tilt of head.

He was standing by the large stone window, seemingly contemplating the bustling crowd in the street below. There was sun in his hair, tinting his dark curls and glowing onto his tanned skin. Dressed like a mere merchant save for the crimson ribbon holding his locks into a long, loose ponytail, he looked clean, and proper and honest – everything he was not.

Lovino crossed his arms, only half-facing him, his back turned at the lively view. “It is a public library,” he said flatly.

If anything, he was good at being stern, and looking the part too. He may not have had quite his father and his brother’s head for business, but he certainly had the stomach and the steely resolve to deal with what they would not. So here he was, straight-backed, all black velvet with no adornments save for an austere silver cross around his neck.

“I don’t know if I should trust that you won’t pull out a dagger and gut me, even in front of all these honest men,” the Spaniard shrugged. “In all my life I’ve met many dangerous fellows, and I daresay dealt with them. You, signor Vargas, must be one of the worst. You know, I saw you in church the other day, with your family. You… appeared like a very pious, innocent young man, but I have seen that you are a fiend.”

Was this godawful pirate trying to aggravate him? Lovino could guess what the man was saying - that he was in truth nothing like his family. Not kind, not cheerful, not a patron of arts, not inclined to beauty and good spirit. Only, he knew that to face the world one needed not cheer and birdsong, but grit and a touch of ruthlessness.

“Your servants are still alive.”

Carriedo laughed, and he was much too beautiful when he did, his smile too bright, his eyes too gemlike in the dwindling rays. Lovino inhaled sharply, making an effort to hold his gaze and not to visibly swallow the knot in his throat.

“Your quarrel wasn’t with them, after all. You knew they were only there to test your skill. Anyway… what are you really going to do about it?” he asked, motioning towards the ledgers open onto the nearby table. “Your family tried to cheat me out of a lot of money, how do you plan to sort it out? My merchandise-”

“But it wasn’t your merchandise, was it?” Lovino hissed, leaning forward. With the corner of his eye, he spied some curious glances coming their way and did his best to keep his composure and his voice in check.

“But I got my hands on it,” the pirate pointed, keeping his voice low in turn. “And once I get my hands on something, it’s mine.”

Lovino did not want to think of that. Or of the man’s hands.

He turned around at last and glanced in the distance, over the low rooftops, to where the water was visible in the distance. It was interesting, how the sky became suddenly green and the sea a weird shade of pink, glinting faintly under the setting sun.

“Mr. Carriedo, as fearsome as you might be out there, amidst the high seas, in this city you don’t have much leverage and you know it. My father is not considering paying the full price, absolutely not. But we could facilitate an expansion of your distribution channel. Maybe. But if you insist on a compensation-”

“You will compensate me.”

Lovino blinked, opening his mouth to state the contrary, but his wrist was captured without warning and he was pulled towards the other. His reflexes kicked in, all his muscles suddenly taut at the danger, and the hidden blade slipped from his sleeve and into his grasp, being pointed at Carriedo’s throat in the blink of an eye.

“Dios mio, qualquier hombre perdia su cabesa por ti…” the Spaniard murmured, his green eyes shining with mirth.

The bastard!

“You don’t seem that scared though,” Lovino observed dryly, tilting the blade a little closer.

Carriedo continued to hold the wrist of his free hand, doing nothing to avert the dagger nearly touching his collar. The grip of his fingers was light, almost gentle, even as he pressed his thumb into the younger’s pulse point.

“Surely not as scared as you are. You asked me here, where you thought you’d be safe with so much people around, and you still came armed to the teeth. You have more of these, don’t you? And yet, no matter how much steel, it’s not enough.”

Damn him! His words poured, like honeyed wine, drowning Lovino in his own vulnerability. Much too soft, much too sweet.

“Of what?! Of you, signor Carriedo?” he almost spat through gritted teeth, lifting his chin.

The Spaniard’s smile only softened further. “Of yourself. Of who you really might be beyond all this darkness – a man who wants to live, to take even one free breath, not a mad hellhound to be unleashed upon the enemy at his master’s convenience, distained and getting but meagre scraps off the table.”

Lovino blinked, his mouth impossibly dry, his lips pressed much too tightly, barely drawing enough air. His hand only fisted around the handle of the dagger, struggling to keep it steady in the onslaught of pure anger. Only, he was something else entirely beyond the darkness, and wondered with fright whether this wretched man could glimpse it too, and bring about his absolute ruin.

“You don’t know anything-”

“What do I not know? Your father could have sent one of those ordinary assassins for this job, since he has no real desire to negotiate. I have killed many men, I have plunged my blade into their flesh with no qualms whatsoever, he knows it too well and he still sent you.”

Lovino forced a deep breath and the corners of his mouth into a grin. “If you harm me here, all the compensation you can expect will be a noose around your neck. And if you know me so well, then you can imagine that a mad hellhound like me has no taste for crafty words!”

With that, he lowered the dagger and yanked himself free from the pirate’s grasp. He became aware that some of the people around had been staring at them rather pointedly and he sighed, annoyed.

Carriedo pulled back in turn, crossing his arms and bowing his head. “Lovino, of course I will not harm you here. But your father is a thief, so he will either pay me or he’d better hire an entire army, lest I harm him and his whole family, elsewhere.” When he looked up, his eyes were suddenly sharp and predatory. “Two million.”

“That is four times what we-…!”

Lovino looked away, out the window, at the darkening horizon. Clouds gathering, tinged purple. Foolishly, he wasn’t afraid anymore. Not of a fight, whatever the outcome.

“We are gentlemen, after all. If you still have a grievance, despite what we offered, the two of us could duel.”

He knew it wasn’t much of an offer but his father was stubborn, and much too bold for his own good. ‘I am not a gentleman, and I will kill you’ he expected the other to say, but Carriedo just picked up his ledgers and collected them to his chest calmly, entirely unhurried.

“Tell your father to pay me the two million, signor Vargas,” he said serenely. “And quickly, before they become four. Oh, and-…” he stopped in front of Lovino and leaned in, his nose nearly brushing the younger’s ear. “It would have been only one if you hadn’t drawn the knife on me, querido.”

[possumcollege]

Apologies to my comics friends here but this is ridiculous:

Just the photo for folks who like to ZOOM!

I've been handling guns since I was 6yrs old. These are obviously not real pistols. You can tell by the screw holes in the frames, the mold/assembly lines, the undersized magwells, and the VERY clear airsoft magazines. It's a specific mix of contemporary guns too, including at least 7 H&K USPS, which cost about $1,200 each, assorted Glocks, "tactical" 1911s, and generic S&W/ Beretta autos. They're some of the most common airsoft guns. The guns that aren't obvious plastic reproductions show no wear, and "custom" features that you wouldn't see on say, smuggled military weapons being carried around by local militia in a region that is absolutely littered with cheaper older Soviet hardware. Even looted American weapons would more likely include a bunch of very beat up Beretta M9s.

Plus a random Winchester 92? Is John Wayne's ghost backing HAMAS?

This is my favorite part though:

THAT appears to be a PILE of Knights Armament PDWs and only KAC PDWs. That gun is an "experimental" rifle w/ a $3k price tag. It chambers a proprietary 6x35mm round or 300 Blackout. Not standard ammo for any major military on Earth, making it a terrible choice for guerilla fighters. 500rds of 300blk will cost you as much as a basic S&W M&P (a civilian M4 clone) in .556 if you can find it in the US. The KAC PDW is also a popular airsoft rifle since it's rare, expensive, and dripping with tacticool features. There are almost certainly more airsoft versions than real ones in the world, but I can't say for sure because I can't find a number produced online.

There are NO AKs, M4s, M16s, FN FALs- guns that might conceivably be available in numbers for insurgent militia in the region. It's not uncommon to see fighters in the Middle East still fielding WW2-era weapons, but the only other long gun I can even try to ID on that table is essentially a cowboy gun! 🤠

A refugee camp had a baker's dozen of these though. 👇

A niche gun, so unused in any real number that the sum total of its service history on Wikipedia (gun guys religiously, lovingly maintain gun Wikis) is this:

There are at least 13 of them in this picture, so either that's nigh $40k sharing a table with rusted hunting guns and toys or ALSO TOYS!

(I still prefer LEGO)

10 minutes of searching on my phone was enough to prove this shit isn't real. And I am very very sleepy today. Writing this post took longer than tracking down that rifle by its features. I know this might not be as obvious to people who haven't handled real guns but for anyone remotely familiar with them, this looks like a joke.

This makes American cops posing around a ziploc bag of weed look good by comparison. That weed might be real.

This is extremely lazy misinformation work. It's a pathetically low effort ruse from an army that could easily have just planted real weapons. The only reason someone would post this for the world to see and claim it's real is if they're very, very stupid, think we are, or are well beyond trying because they know they hold a position of such untouchable privilege that they're cool doing the bare minimum of covering their asses. Like the cops!

All of those options make me real sad. So I'm going to just post this and never check on the comments.

[backjustforberena]

I was looking through my blog, saw my reblogs of your gifs, and realized I hadn't stalked scrolled through your blog in DAYS. All the Eve stuff I see in your blog always makes me do a happy, little dance. Also, I may or may not fill up your notifs again 😁

And that Daemon and Rhaenys scene?? I may or may not have ended up shipping them because of it and exploring the possibilities of their dynamic from the one or two interactions between them that was shown has certainly consumed my thoughts. All the what-ifs! But I do keep it low-key in my main blog because I usually see a lot of Daemon hate and I just wanna be in my own little corner, enjoying my thing 🙈

Awww, bless you, that's so lovely. You're very kind, I do appreciate it. It's always nice to see your username crop up in my activity. Go nuts! What more can someone ask for but engagement on their posts?

You ship Daemon and Rhaenys? How interesting! I don't, and I don't think I could really do so even for funsies, there are just too many obstacles in the way for me to do that. Fussy, I know. But I certainly do agree that they have one heck of an interesting dynamic and I would have loved to have seen more of that.

I've not seen Matt discuss those interactions very much but I have seen Eve, discuss both the look she gives Daemon after the news about Jaehaerys, and then the one scene that we have of them alone, together. And how she sees that dynamic and how she thinks Rhaenys sees Daemon, and Daemon, particularly, in that moment and within the context of that scene.

It's one of the relationships where we don't get much but there's so much history and so much inferred, even in just the first season, that you can feel fairly confident in the dynamic. You can feel it. And, for me, it's interesting just looking at how they are positioned in the world and how they pivot around the Iron Throne. The similarities and differences between them, and in how that Targaryen spirit is in them both and is expressed and presented.

The fact that they are, or were, or whatever tense you want to use, the last pillar of a bygone age, as Jaehaerys's grandchildren. There's a shared history known only to them as they go over death after death. They are part of an era now gone. There are no dragon riders as experienced as them, by a fairly decent margin, also.

Something that I wish they'd made more of an effort to represent would be that they could have been said to be the angel and devil on Rhaenyra's shoulder: they're opposites in that way, with Daemon doing damage to and Rhaenys trying to enforce Rhaenyra's authority. The aggressive vs the thoughtful. They're profoundly different people but still passionate, loyal, and fierce. Displaced, proud, independent.

I think Eve described that scene of them together as them being like a panther vs a rattlesnake, and I like what that implies: profoundly different beasts but, at the end of the day, both deadly - both predators.

[allwormdiet]

Insinuation 2.2

Time for another day of learning and adventure at Winslow High

That does have to be weird, though, right? Like "I fought a big badass villain last night and survived, my whole world has been changed by this encounter, I stared death in the face, what do you mean I still have to go to class and act like nothing changed?" Massive whiplash, I'd imagine.

Mrs. Knott gives the impression of being... better, at least, than Gladly. She's putting the effort in if nothing else, even if she has to leave the better-performing students alone in order to handle the rest of them, but that feels more like a matter of understaffing than any personal failure on her part.

God it's still messed up that Taylor has such little respite from bullying. This poor girl.

...I think this is the first time I've ever seen anything about Taylor knowing basic computer programming. Wonder if that ever comes back around.

And yeah Taylor, of course you have a geeky reputation, you're a fucking geek. Even setting aside the stuff with the bullying, like c'mon.

I saw a shitpost about how the single reason that Earth Bet is a dystopia is that Reddit is the number one news source in the world and there's something really funny about that idea.

Okay real quick the screenshot would be too small for me to add alt text, but “This article is a stub. Be a hero and help us expand it.” is an objectively hilarious line

And here we get the most information on any given Undersider, and it's immediately clear that Rachel has had a hard fucking life, like hell. Living on the streets as a teenage parahuman must be rough as hell, it's like living on the streets as a normal teenager except people want to recruit or imprison you while wearing stupid costumes instead of just police uniforms

(I would follow a Bitch fansite though, for real)

That's not how gangs work but whatever

So the ABB has a dragon man with dragon tattoos who uses the Chinese word for dragon as his cape name while being from Japan, a suicide bomber who dresses like a ninja, and a bomb Tinker. I don't know enough about Bakuda to really say but Lung and Oni Lee's gimmicks feel... mm. Lazy isn't the right word. Let's just stick with "racist" and move on so it stops bugging me

This is cute actually. She did a good job and she wants to like, celebrate that... and the only problem is that there's nobody she can celebrate with. I just made myself sad thinking about that.

And now she's basically Googling herself, which is also somehow cute.

There's something really funny about the idea that like. Taylor gets in touch with the Undersiders through a fucking Missed Connections post on a superhero message board. Like it's almost certainly the safest and most reliable way to get that message out, but that doesn't make it less comical.

And it looks like that's where we're leaving things.

Current Thoughts

Hit some highs and lows with this chapter honestly. Learning a little bit more about Taylor (swear to god I've never heard the programming thing come up before) and getting more of a breakdown on the Undersiders is all well and good, plus developments from the events of the night before, but again the whole Deal of the ABB grates pretty harshly. Like you don't need goddamn Edward Said to tell you that's all crap, it's just crap, and I don't think it reflects well on the author for putting that crap out there instead of thinking about it for maybe another thirty minutes first.

I gotta run some errands, 2.3 after that, God willing I don't have to read about the ABB for a while longer

[ungoonableaddict]

The Ideal Gooner Bod

Wow, I'm still here!

This post is about something I've reflected on for some time, and I felt it was worth putting out there. You can see it in the title: "The Ideal Gooner Bod".

What does that mean? Well it's obviously subjective, as so much of life is. But to me, an ideal gooner is fat. Now, I will express my bias right away, I do have a fat fetish.

HOWEVER!

I'd like to posit that you don't need to have a fat fetish to enjoy this aspect of the gooner lifestyle. To me, it's part and parcel, and the reasons are obvious:

Gooning already entails a sedentary lifestyle with low levels of activity on its own.

Many gooners I've met are either single, or in relationships they don't want to be in, meaning there's little incentive to maintain a slim body.

Relatedly, part of being a gooner is committing yourself in some fashion to porn, right? And in committed relationships, one or both parties generally ends up letting themselves go. Porn certainly can't, so why not you? Show that you've found your one true love!

You already indulge in the hedonistic pleasures of porn and masturbation. Why not add yummy foods to that collection?

The odds are already stacked against you as you age. Your brain finishes development at age 25, meaning hormones level out and more effort is needed to maintain your body. Plus as you age, your metabolism slows.

Something new to goon to. Since plenty of gooners are already fat, there's lots of caps out there to indulge in, encouraging you to eat and stay big.

Objections and Rebuttals:

"I don't want to be fat!" If you're in this for Porn, who cares what you want? If you believe Porn wants you single, Porn wants you isolated, why not overweight? By default it shows others you don't care, which further increases your chances of staying single, staying alone.

"Being fat is unhealthy!"

So, this one requires a little more discussion. First, being fat is unhealthy! That is objectively true. More weight puts more strain on your body. However, you know what also strains your body? Not being fit in the first place. If you already don't work out, why does it matter? Indeed, while there is some disagreement, I've read (and you can search for yourself and come to your own conclusion) that being fat and active is better than being thin and inactive.

Second, I did mention food as a plus side of being bigger, but you don't actually have to eat junk food unless you really want to. There are healthier ways to pork up for Porn that you can look into if you're worried about diabetes and the like.

Third, if you're already fit, you don't have to stop being that way. This is presumptuous of me as someone online but if you have a very solid fitness routine AND are a gooner, I can't imagine it's solely because you're motivated by health. So why not take the plunge and try packing on some pounds?

"I don't want health issues associated with being overweight!"

Refer back to the initial point I made for the last objection, first. I believe the general rule of thumb for being generally healthy and avoiding heart issues is "at least 30 minutes of moderate exercise 3 times a week", i.e. enough that you can't talk while working out, and your heart is racing during that time. Are you getting that?

If not, then as someone who already finds exacerbating porn and masturbation addiction to be hot, just go a little further. Let your body become a VERY noticeable sign that porn is ruining you.

Honestly, that's the main argument I have. I feel like anyone reading this who's truly fit, sticking to an exercise regimen, etc. can feasibly put on weight and have zero issues, particularly if they want to lose it again! So really I'm addressing a bunch of already-unfit masturbators who don't want things to get "serious".

Like giving up years of your life, relationships, sexual intimacy, a regularly-functioning brain, and money aren't serious?

Or the heart disease you're already at risk of from not staying active isn't serious?

This is turning into a vague fitness post but let me sum it up: If you're thin or chubby and don't do any exercise, why not work to make yourself bigger? You already don't care about your (heart) health. It's the same as when you might have been a masturbator who was going back and forth about even liking porn addiction or gooning. Either start trying to get fit (which would give you more control over gaining anyway), or give up and start pigging out on food like you do on porn, loser! Come on.

Overall, I hope this post has made it clear that I see no reason for you, the reader, to not be nice and round for Porn.

If you already are, that's awesome. Good for you. :) I think the term "Porn piggy" being able to be used literally is pretty damn hot. Those who find themselves fat already, I don't have a lot to say. Keep gooning for Porn. Enjoy that soft body that signals your complacency, that shows you're devoted to something special to you. If you're fat, but not fit? Well ideally you should try to keep yourself healthy, too. But if fast food and gooning right now sound better?

Who am I to say no to someone keeping their body in-shape, particularly when that shape is round? ;)