#it affects every creative mind that ever wanted to show the world what they made | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

sylpheedz · 4 months ago

Text

In Memory of Jeysen Perez Lyons (1996-2022) & Akira Toriyama (1955-2024)

This is actually quite late, but I'd like to take a minute to pour one out for a very good friend of mine who took his own life two years ago now, and a man who's creativity touched countless young lives all over the world.

Eulogy below, puttin' it under a Read More. Warning, it does talk about s**c*de and if you're not going to be okay after reading about it, probably don't read it then.

I'd like to start with Toriyama-sensei (right).

Akira Toriyama captured hearts of millions every with stories of friendship, growth, and gloriously, ridiculously intense anime action since 1984. He was the man behind art of the Dragon Quest games, and most notably, Goku, the character that would inspire countless to always surpass their limits and giving their very best...or something like that.

I'll admit, I was never really a DBZ fan myself. Never did get with the hype. I'd catch it a few times on old Toonami, but it just never really captured my attention the way it did for so many others. Never even really made the discrepancy that it was anime, it was just another cartoon to me as a kid.

But the funny thing is, you don't even really have to be a DBZ fan to still be affected by it. While I never really watched the show itself, I was exposed to it by the animations by fans it inspired, specifically Super Mario Bros. Z, a fanfiction sprite animation series by one Alvin Earthworm where Sonic and Shadow team up with the Mario Bros. to fight Mecha Sonic for the chaos emeralds and prevent him from destroying any more worlds. There was that and Nazo Unleashed, which was a flash animation that used frames of the show for its fight scenes, which was the rawest shit ever to me as an adolescent. These animationss' fight scenes, which were very heavily inspired by Dragon Ball Z, are what inspired me to practice my art and work my way up towards animating.

So while there may have been a few middle men involved, but even my creative mind's been influenced by Toriyama. And for what it's worth? I'm thankful for the madness he's given me. All the AMVs and fight scenes I concoct in my head while either laying in bed unable to sleep or taking a shower. Who knows. Maybe I actually will watch the show just for some ideas on animation techniques.

While I may not have personally been as enamored with DBZ as everyone else, I knew someone very closely who was an absolute madlad for it.

His name was Jeysen Lyons (middle), and he's probably one of the best friends I've ever had in my entire life. Hell, maybe even the best. I met Jeysen back in my very first year of middle school, along with Masatoshi and Chris, my first real friends after having spent my elementary days ostracized among the other kids to the point of suicidal thoughts.

He was a really funny kid, dirty jokes galore and could quote entire YouTube Poop videos from memory (and we had some much raunchier shit back then lmao, it really was a different time from today). It was always more fun when Jeysen was around.

After graduating middle school, I found it harder to keep in touch. I'd always get so engrossed with my own life that I could never really keep up with old friends like I'd want to. Never was good at keeping up. But there were still some summers where we could get together at his mom's apartment for his birthday, July 10. Eventually, his mom found work in another state, and they had to move to Mississippi. After that, I hadn't heard from him for a while. I don't remember how, but at some point I managed to get ahold of Jeysen's Steam account and could talk to him from there, and we friended each other on Discord. It was always so much chatting with him online, though sometimes he would some concerning memes, which wouldn't be surprising considering he lurked 4chan.

On that note, it seemed like he absorbed the sentiments regarding us queers as probably a lot of 'channers would normally have, ranging from "don't be publicly visible" to "just need to be shot". Once my egg cracked, it became one of those things that were more...complicated. And thanks to that, I wasn't sure how to tell him about...well, me.

I wasn't sure how he'd react. Would he accept me while thinking me stranger tan he thought? Would he have still considered me a friend but disrespected my identity openly? Would he have completely and totally hated me, moving forward? I wanted to tell him, but I always got too nervous whenever I tried, so we'd just end up chatting, which was always still fun, but I so badly wanted to break the ice with him at some point.

Other than that, we'd even talk about each other's personal projects, like my Revolutionary Vanguard Minerva, and his Perfect Universe, which is about a high school boy that gets caught in an alien war of good and evil and attains god-like power in the midst of it, and has to try to keep it from driving him mad. I always thought it was an interesting premise. I wish I asked him more questions about it.

At some point two years ago, Jeysen contacted me sounding...exasperated. Panicked. I told him that whatever was happening, he could talk to me, and that I'd be there for him whenever he'd need me. But after I said that, he just said he'd be fine, and then left.

Fast-forward to days later, in the middle of calling my representatives about another horrendous internet bill that came back, I tried talking to Jeysen again, as I was a bit worried. I got a response, asking me if I was "M". I asked them to clarify, and they asked if I was [deadname]. I said yeah.

And they told me they were his mom, and that Jeysen had died.

I thought it was a really strange prank at first. I even got angry, told them to knock it the fuck off. But then I looked up his name, and sure enough, there he was, in an obituary.

I couldn't believe it. Jeysen really did do it. I lost my best friend.

I lost my brother.

From what his mom said, he was frantic about something involving "docksing". I'm thinking she meant doxxing. It sounded like at some point Jeysen caught the attention of somebody who knew how to get people's info, and that sent him into a panic attack while they were already trying to transfer him to different medication for bipolarism.

His demons got the best of him in a moment of emotional instability, and he was finally pushed too far, and now he's gone.

It...still doesn't feel real. It still feels like I could just reach out to him, right now, on this chat client like usual and start talking to him again. Maybe it'll never feel "real" to me. But it is. My boy is gone.

His mom assured me it's not my fault, and I know it isn't. But I keep replaying scenarios in my head, where maybe if I'd just...been the one to approach more, maybe he wouldn't have done it. If I'd taken more time to ask him about his day, ask him about Perfect Universe, to watch DBZ or other anime with him...

If I'd just gone out of my way to spend more time with him... Maybe I could've made him stay. Maybe I could've saved him. Maybe, maybe... I could go over all the "maybes" in the world, but it wouldn't change the reality that he is not here anymore. Not a day has gone by where I haven't thought of him at least once.

And this is actually why Toriyama's death hit me harder than other deaths. I actually started crying when I found out. It felt like I was losing a part of my bro, in a way. Which is probably silly, that's a whole-ass other person, another individual. It's not like DBZ is going to stop being a thing because he died. I have no doubt is probably as immortalized in Japanese and probably even worldwide culture as Astro Boy. Actually, more than Astro Boy. Atom's admittedly a little more niche...

But the worst part? I never got to tell him. I never gave him the chance to reject me, but I also never gave him the chance to accept me either. Now I'll never know. I'll never know whether our friendship was flimsy and fleeting or made of iron. I'd like to hope it was, personally, but...

Either way, I'll always miss him. Life's much duller without my brother with me. I have so much that I want to talk to him about. So many new ideas, so many new things I wanna do with my life, now that I'm finally going through my transition journey. But I guess that'll all have to wait till I'm up there with him.

He'd better be up there. 😠

Lemme tell ya, folks.

If I go up there and find out the Big Boss in the sky put him in the incinerator for "being a quitter" when he was already in inconceivable pain that caused him to take his own life?

He is catching these fucking hands of mine. I don't care if I'm gonna lose, it's on sight for doing mah boi like that. 👿🔪

I will dive down to hell and fucking claw my brother out of the lake of fire myself if I have to.

But in all seriousness, if I could go back in time, even if it meant I had to start my life completely over, I wouldn't even blink if it meant I could see my brother again. I can only hope he's in a better place right now.

...Or ol' man God and I are gonna have to have some words. 😡

#in memoriam #in memory #tribute #jeysen lyons #akira toriyama

6 notes · View notes

randomalistic · 1 year ago

Text

I just watched Star Wars a new hope for the first-ish time. And . I have a lot of thoughts about the way movies are Preserved and re-presented and how they Interact with society. And this is also just a general review lol

KEEP IN MIND THIS IS COMING FROM SOMEONE WHO NEVER ENGAGED IN STAR WARS MEDIA EVER so I’m very biased towards Not Getting It. I know this is a deeply beloved franchise so I have to. Speak carefully.

Maybe I just had super high expectations due to the Entire Cultural Phenomenon thing. Like who wouldn’t have high expectations this is literally “The Movie of All Time”. It’s kind of unfortunate how much pressure there is on it in that sense.

TLDR: My favorite parts were when r2d2 screamed like WRREEOOOWWWWWW !!!!!!!!!

ANYWAYS. My opinion (uh oh)

The sets and the effects were OUTSTANDING. As expected. I just wanted a little more main character depth but I suppose that’s what sequels are for

I had fun watching it the special effects and all the weird creatures and robots were my ultra favorite part but…….. UM) the pacing was weird and there wasn't enough tension. Was that just me ? Maybe I was just tired . But .. idk man…

Actually no I can forgive first installments for being a little shaky and awkward. This was literally made like 45 years ago. Like there weren’t a lot of insane movies like this back then so this is kinda just what you got.

But yeah some character depth was left to be desired. Some characters were a little too cold and emotionless like Luke's HOME was destroyed and his Aunt and Uncle were INCINERATED TO SMOKING SKELETONS & he had almost no reaction. Like can the characters be a little traumatized please . nobody cried in this movie. I know they're going through a space war so maybe Leia is a little more cold and callused. But Luke?? Luke is just a kid… even if he didn’t care about his aunt and uncle That much, he should have had a stronger reaction.

I completely get that this was 1977 and there was probably a lot of stigma for a protagonist male character expressing that amount of vulnerability and grief in a MOVIE. That would have been unheard of. At least I assume so.

But it’s such a shame because Luke is the person we’re viewing this movie through he’s like the audience stand in. And unfortunately when he doesn’t care/show emotion, I also find it more difficult to care and get invested. Not that I DIDNT care. It just made me take it less seriously and affected tension. That combined with the funky pacing also affected the tension poorly… so I was finding it hard to stay engaged. aside from seeing the silly creatures every once in a while. But maybe that’s also because my dog kept interrupting me lol. Again ☹️ this movie was meant to be watched in a huge theater… 40 years ago.. maybe it just doesn’t translate ?

I was also not a fan of leia and Luke becoming instant love interests like. how did that even happen they just met. have they had a single conversation. AGAIN it’s just because it’s an old movie I should cut it some slack. But it just left a lot to be desired. I think that’s because what I care about in movies the most is the characters and their personalities.

I think this movie was definitely more of a “this is a technological marvel with an amazing score and incredible sci-fi action!!” And less of a “this is a movie showcasing AMAZING and COMPLEX CHARACTERS” the human characters are pretty basic im sorry to say. But like. how can I criticize that when this was like the first movie to make those character types basic

Maybe it’s because living in a hugely inspired-by-Star-Wars-world it’s just gotten so.. old? Exhausting maybe? Western society expects that you’ve seen Star Wars. “You haven’t seen Star Wars?? Are you kidding!! It’s a classic!!” Maybe I’ve just seen these tropes so many times I’m unable to properly appreciate the sheer creativity and groundbreaking nature of the original. Which if that’s true, is genuinely unfortunate. I wish this film could properly translate itself to newer generations but you would have to consume it in a vacuum I swear. Which is weird. Because a movie with similar cultural impact like the Matrix still had me engaged when I saw it. I DONT KNOW MAN. THIS MIGHT JUST BE A ME PROBLEM.

I’m just saying its popularity lessens the impact of the franchise and changes the viewing experience a lot.. especially with the longer you wait to watch it. Which wasn’t a problem for the people watching it in the theater for the first time!! Of course it was magical and unlike anything people had ever seen before!! In that era It hadn’t become obnoxiously popular yet (I mean this in the nicest way possible.)

Anyways. Characters I did like. R2D2 was cute and him and c3po had divorced couple energy. I think their scenes were my favorite. It’s a big scary world out their for a couple of silly gay droids. I mean what.

Han solo was kind of a lovable asshole until he decided to be a mysoginist.. 💔I am used to taking old movies with a grain of salt but should I really have to tolerate that kind of stuff. SORRY ITS AN OLD AND VERY ICONIC MOVIE . I NEED TO GIVE IT A MASSIVE GRAIN OF SALT. But yeah Leia is the only female character besides Luke’s aunt. It was 1977. At least they made her badass and shoot things yaaay

(Unfortunately I watched it on a stretched out DVD version but this gif looks like better quality lmao. AGAIN… LOSING THE ARTIST INTENTION BY WATCHING ON A DVD💔 it’s so sad man.)

OK FINALLY SOMETHING ELSE I LIKED. (Everything I don’t complain about you have to assume I Enjoyed okay. I just don’t have much to say about those things lmfao) but yes I liked Obi Wan and Luke’s mentor-student(?) relationship it was very sweet. I liked their interactions!

It’s kind of funny he cared more about Obi-Wan dying more than his house and family LOL. BUT THAT SAYS SOMETHING!!! THAT REALLY SAYS SOMETHING. IT SHOWS HE CARED. HE SCREAMED “NO!!!!” WHEN HE SAW IT HAPPEN. And he felt awful afterwards and Leia comforted him, IF ONLY FOR A BRIEF MOMENT before flying around and having fun again. But that was THERE!! and that was real character depth okay.

I SWEAR I ENJOYED IT. I WILL PROBABLY WATCH EMPIRE STRIKES BACK JUST TO SEE IF IT IMPROVES BC IVE HEARD THATS THE BEST ONE. but yeah. silly and cheesy sci fi adventure with tons of creatures of COURSE I liked it. It’s an AMAZING MOVIE and it’s ONE OF THE MOST INFLUENTIAL MOVIES IN ALL OF HUMAN HISTORY. But that means IT SUFFERS. It suffers because of Society. I’m the joker now and here’s my Star Wars unpopular opinion. I didn’t expect anybody to read that far. Thanks.

BUT I HAVE. one last bitchy complaint. I know the opening scrolling text is the most iconic movie thing on earth and I should Appreciate that. but TALK ABOUT INACCESSIBLE LOL I COULD BARELY READ THAT SHIT. IT FELT LIKE I WAS WATCHING WINDOWS MOVIE MAKER. THE SLANT MADE IT SO HARD TO READ. You could only read the full sentence when it’s like in the Middle of the screen and by then it’s already shrinking and scrolling AWAYYYYY!!! GHAAHA it’s so bad. (affectionate) but I think it’s charming how Bad the opening scroll objectively is and yet it’s still so beloved and iconic. (I promise I mean well.)

Ok on second thought maybe it was the DVD that messed it up even more. Sigh. Because this looks perfectly fine. THATS SO UNFORTUNATE THAT SOMEONES MOVIE EXPERIENCE CAN BE COMPLETELY DIFFERENT DEPENDING ON IF ITS WATCHED ON A DVD OR IN A THEATER OR ALONE OR WITH OTHERS AND THERES SO MANY FACTORS UGH!!! This cannot continue.

#IM SORRY.#film #film review #txt #long post #I hate on movies because i care about them deeply.#AND I LIKED THIS MOVIE!!!!!#movie #I love writing my thoughts down for each movie I watch. my reviews are getting longer.

13 notes · View notes

fromtenthousandfeet · 2 months ago

Note

https://www.tumblr.com/fromtenthousandfeet/761662581896347648/i-think-bts-will-do-a-world-tour-of-1-year-and-a?source=share

I have so many thoughts about every member and their feelings towards returning to BTS that it verges on fanfic

JK - has emotional attachment to BTS but is very confident about going solo and wants to explore that. I sincerely doubt he'll sideline his solo career to stay with the group full-time especially since he's been deemed the chosen one by bsh and scooter and is well aware of it

Tae - I think he probably loves the relevance and money that comes with being a BTS member but I really don't think he likes the grind or keeping up with other members work ethic for practice and what not (isn't that the real crux of the infamous dumpling fight?). I bet he loved being super lazy and calling the shots during his solo career like no choreo (lol armys designated dance line member who hates dancing) and making time for travel and variety shows instead of working on and releasing a ton of songs. I can see him staying if they scale back stuff to cater to him

Jimin - he's got an emotional attachment to BTS as well and I think the him of 2021 would've been gung ho to be back in the group full-time but I think working on songs by himself and doing promo by himself - while it was hard and he's admitted it was hard and time consuming....I think he really loved it. He seemed to find the whole process creatively fulfilling - much more than his recent activities in BTS actually. Plus like Tae, I bet he liked finally being able to call the shots too. If they get back as BTS and he's sidelined again (which I unfortunately think he will be), I think he'll be reluctant to stay full time. Also feel his solo success has quietly made him more confident in himself and his capabilities even if he doesn't constantly toot his own horn like JK

RM - another guy who loves the relevance of being in BTS but finds everything about the experience of being a member stifling. If his solo career had gotten the traction of Jimin's or JK's, then he'd be out of BTS like yesterday. Pending that, I think he might actually put the group first. Being a BTS member got him to the world stage - that means something to him

JHope - he's so opaque to me. I really have no idea

Yoongi - definitely would continue the group full-time. I think he's someone who would've been able to continue his solo career with full steam even while being a group member full time and he probably finds it easier to make connections as a BTS member and would take full advantage of that

Jin - again I'm not very sure. I feel he'd be okay with either. I don't think he craves clout and just has a healthy appetite to be successful. I don't think he'd mind a smaller career as a solo artist but I also think he wouldn't mind continuing in BTS either. But he's also not properly done his solo album and it's associated promo yet and that definitely has an affect so we'd have to check back in six months

This is the healthiest fanfic I've ever seen. I completely agree with your assessment of each member.

Speaking of bordering on fanfic, sometimes I think part of the reason Jimin has been so adamant about staying together as a group is because he knows the others aren't as popular as he is and will struggle in their solo careers. Basically, he wants to stay together so the others don't fall short and feel humiliated. JHope and Jin come to mind, because neither have broad appeal.

Taehyung and Jungkook will never be as successful as Jimin, at least not on their own merits, but they both have a large enough following to carve out decent solo careers. Tae has seemed bored with being in BTS for quite some time. Go be an actor/influencers or whatever. I think Jungkook is really looking forward to going solo. I've never seen him happier than Left & Right, the World Cup, SEVEN/Golden videos and performances, but especially the Festa dinner where they announced their hiatus. He could hardly contain his excitement while the rest of the group looked like their dogs had just died.

RM? I swear he's ready to leave BTS, but you're right, he's attached to the fame. There's a real internal struggle going on in his brain. I hope he doesn't sing too much in his future endeavors. He's a great songwriter, though, so please continue in that direction. But for his own dignity, I need him to go solo, especially if more crap like Butter is on the horizon.

As for Yoongi, I have no idea. I don't get that guy at all.

Thanks for sharing your thoughts! We'll see what happens in the next few years.

6 notes · View notes

ignitesthestxrs · 10 months ago

Note

embarassment is cringe who's your bias

oh LOL dw dw i am not literally embarrassed! more just, mindful of audience u know? but also ur my audience now

i am not really a person who tends towards Biases, but here are some guys that i really love atm!

SHINee's Key - look i love all members of shinee, they probably are my ult group these days, but if you forced me at gun point to pick one it would be This Guy. key is kind of the embodiment of the tension of how faggy can you be in public without ever coming out and - well, coming out. i also have a deep respect for how much effort he puts into his solo career, and how interesting and innovative his album concepts have been esp since he got back from the military

Exo's Kai - ah my precious Nini who is here with us largely to vibe. i think he's such a great example of like, how you can be totally hands off in terms of the creative direction of your albums LOL and still be a great performer? this man lip synced his way through his own concert and looked great doing it, 10/10. but i also love just how much he clearly loves his job and meeting other idols and getting to go on tv shows and learn new things about people and the world LOL a giant puppy of a man

TXT's Soobin - speaking of giant puppy men, this is one of my Large Son's Whom I Adore. my fave thing about soobin is that he's like. never held more than a single thought in his head at one time, and everyone he has ever met adores him? like every 4th gen group has a member who is just completely enamoured with soobin, and soobin does not appear to have done anything in particular to have earned this other than being a big guy who likes anime and hedgehogs. i also enjoy how everyone in his group agreed that he needed to be the leader, especially the guys (yeonjun and taehyun) who might have preferred to be the leader themselves, specifically because they knew giving it to the guy who didn't want it the way that they did would probably be a better outcome for the group. amazing head empty man. he's so tall.

Zerobaseone's Hanbin - something is wrong with this man (positive) (fond). no uh, this is a man who has gone to great lengths to change both his physical appearance and personal affect in order to take one last shot at achieving his kpop dreams and something is wrong with ME for how feral this makes me. another guy in the 'legibly queer' column (as in, he was a competitive waacker and faggy as hell doing it lmfao like, sure i'm sure there are straight guys who waack but at a certain point you're allowed to start assuming Gay instead of defaulting Straight ok). he is a control freak. he said his favourite type of person is someone who is competent but pretends not to be so that he can do things instead. one time he was so horrified by his member wearing socks on the bed that he REMOVED THAT BOY'S SOCKS FOR HIM? ON CAMERA? HANBIN WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU

WayV's Kun - the dad to end all dads. i have endless leader feelings about this man, who is the leader of SM's final push to conquer the China market that was actually going really well until [redacted], and suddenly Kun is the leader of a group that has members in different countries, that cannot promote in China while the pandemic is going on and cannot promote in Chinese while in Korea. technically WayV is under the umbrella of the broader NCT group, but xenophobia will have stans staying 'they just don't vibe for some reason'. this man's group was shelved for over a year due to international geopolitics and he held it and them together admirably, and it's been SO good to see WayV employed in 2023 and gaining momentum again. also he can fly a plane ( a real one), somehow made PUBG hot by being very good at it, and one time he was live and you just heard from the background one of his members yelling from the shower KUN GE THERE'S NO HOT WATER, like, every man in this group just has it hard wired into their brain that if there is a problem, kun ge will fix it. and he does.

honestly i could probably go for longer, there are a lot of boys i have a lot of feelings about s o b.

4 notes · View notes

hecckyeah · 1 year ago

Text

I wasn't really an especially emotional kid.

while all my friends and family cried watching movies, I never would. maybe just a case of eldest daughter apathy, but now I realize it probably had everything to do with my undiagnosed autism and/or adhd. I never felt strong feelings toward people. I only ever fought with my siblings and parents and never bonded deeply with any friends. I was living in a sort of self absorbed haze, not realizing I was self absorbed until I grew up and hindsight showed me otherwise. but even though emotions on the surface were limited and hard to come by for me, I was packed full of them on the inside. so much so that I remember one particularly clear, warm, golden blue summer day, I had just finished reading Eragon and immersing myself fully in it for days and days. I laid in the fresh cut grass and felt tears in my eyes and realized that all I ever wanted was for a dragon to come flying down to my yard, pick me up, and take me soaring away from this place. I was so convinced that maybe, just maybe, the fantasy world I'd made in my head was real. I watched the treeline behind my house, thinking that every second that passed was one second closer to my great adventure.

but of course it never came.

and now looking back at twenty-something, jaded by years of emotional upheaval and family drama and daily reality checks... I realize that that day in the yard, watching the skies and waiting for something supernatural to come sweep me away... that was the first time something really moved me. really affected every aspect of my psyche. and along with that, by a cruel twist of fate, that was the day my childhood died. because even at thirteen I had a shred of hope. a tiny glimmer of something inside my brain that said maybe reality isn't what you think. maybe there really are dragons and wizards and elves and grand adventures and the capacity to grow and change into someone worthwhile. and when I looked at the endless blue sky and it was unblemished by my ride out of there, maybe I finally accepted my fate. tied down to the cold rock that we call home, never to see the world that only exists in my mind, never to become something better, someone that people admire. I remember the sinking in my chest, the grip around my heart that reality had in that moment. saying in its cruel, taunting voice, it's time to let it go. no more dreaming. no more delusions. it's time to see the world as it really is, as the adults see it. it's time to grow up.

and grow up, I did.

I became cynical, sarcastic, and numb. my creativity evaporated. my tolerance for things I deemed kiddish disappeared with the blink of an eye. suddenly I became the responsible adult in the house. through family turmoil I became the secondary caregiver and a pseudo mother figure for my young siblings. I refused to watch the movies I used to love as dark circles formed under my young eyes. I reached for that old creativity I used to have, desperately wishing for parts of my childhood back as I was suddenly forced into a premature adulthood. years slipped by. I never had a sweet sixteen, because sixteen was the worst year of my life. I was always last in my friend groups, never anyone's first choice, always the strong responsible older sister who could handle things on her own.

needless to say, my apathy and cynicism only worsened.

but that's the beautiful thing about growing up, I guess. at some point you have a choice. continue on the path of bitterness and apathy, or turn around and embrace the things from your childhood.

and that's exactly what I did.

the moment I hit twenty-one, I decided I'd had enough. that my family couldn't affect me anymore. that I could wear my own rose colored glasses again. I didn't have to discard them altogether. maybe I found them in a box of old dreams or maybe they materialized right in front of me. but either way, now I was in charge of when and where I wanted to wear them.

as an adult, I still have responsibilities. I still feel protective of my siblings and will always feel the need to care for them, but I can step away now. I can put on those rose colored glasses, lay in the yard, and let my mind wander.

turns out, my dragon ultimately did come for me. though it didn't swoop down from the sky like I had wanted. instead it came from the strength and experiences and wisdom of my short life, picking me up and taking me away to all the places I've ever wanted to go. it's my courage, my love, my raw emotions that don't hide behind apathy anymore.

and that's the beautiful thing about growing up.

the world you want doesn't magically appear. you create it yourself. forged in the fire of life, of struggle, of reality.

and it's beautiful.

#katie’s sleep deprived ramblings

3 notes · View notes

elshells · 1 year ago

Note

Happy Tender Tuesday! 💕

What are your character's love languages and how do they express them in times of crisis?

Why are your characters in love with each other? Give me juicy details of what makes them like one another!

What is their reaction to an unexpected but welcome romantic gesture by their significant other? What is their reaction towards someone hurting their significant other (physically, mentally, or emotionally)?

Thank you so much for all the sweet questions! I'm answering for my WIP Agent Ace 🥰

First Question

Sophia: Acts of Service

As her job as a Watch agent may suggest, she feels a strong sense of duty to the people of Harmont.

Janus: Words of Affirmation

Both in terms of giving and receiving praise and affection, and though he hides it well, he deeply internalizes negativity.

Harley: Receiving Gifts/Physical Touch

She adores receiving physical contact from others, but shows her love by giving gifts to her loved ones when she feels they need it most.

Jade: Physical Touch

If someone's feeling sad, she'll always ask if they want a hug, and cuddles, hand holding, or even just skin-to-skin contact makes her feel better during hard times.

Max: Quality Time

Though not overly outgoing or affectionate, spending time with others is what lifts him up mentally and makes him happiest.

Second Question

I'll answer this one for my babies Harley and Jade! Harley loves Jade's creativity, optimism, and the way she can see beauty in every corner of the world. Similarly, Jade adores Harley's passion and determination—how she never gives up once she's made up her mind. It also helps that they're both beautiful people in each others' eyes. <3

Third Question

I'll keep talking about Jade and Harley, since they are the prominent couple/love interests of the story. Honestly, depending on situation, Jade might cry with happiness, especially if she's going through a hard time. For Harley, even though she's not especially touchy-feely, she would be more likely to reciprocate with something like a hug to show her appreciation. On the other hand, if Jade got hurt? Harley immediately goes into defense mode, and will do anything she can to protect Jade. And if Harley was the one in the crossfire, then let's be honest—that's gonna be the angriest you ever see Jade de Soto.

#thank you for the ask!#tender tuesday #writeblr #wip: agent ace #oc: sophia colbo #oc: janus #oc: harley manalis #oc: jade de soto #oc: max ahn #ella's writing

1 note · View note

lunarticxenia · 3 years ago

Text

The Sun Signs

Hi guys! So I decided to make a series. I’m going to do: each sign in each planet, each house placement for every planet, and the aspects for all the planets. This of course is going to be over the course of a month; it’s going to take a while to cover everything LMAO. I’m thinking of doing this and alternating between asteroids, “placements that make people ____”, and astrology observations. Without further ado, here’s my take on the sun signs based off of people I know:

🪁 Aries: These people are go-getters and know what they want when they want it. I feel like a lot of people associate Aries with being extroverts because they’re a fire sign, but I know ALOT of Aries and 95% of them have been shy. It’s more of the Aries moons that I’ve noticed that have been more extroverted. However other aspects in your chart can determine this. They’re also extremely competitive and very hard workers. Every Aries I’ve ever met has worked their ass off, and they keep working their asses off until they perfect everything. Some negatives are that Aries people can be super dramatic as well, and don’t take other people’s advice. Even when they ask for it, if their mind is set on something, there’s no going back.

🪁 Taurus: Boy oh boy, do these people just want to go on a 10 year vacation and not have to deal with anyone ever again. These people love the finer things in life; they most likely have a creative hobby or have a creative streak. They also love good food and they love a good nap. Now everyone says Tauruses are super chill, and honestly, it depends on other aspects in their chart. I’ve known super chill Tauruses and super chaotic Tauruses. I’ve noticed the chaotic Tauruses have a lot of Aries energy in their chart i.e. Aries Mercury and Aries Mars (no offense Aries). I’d say a downside of Tauruses is that they can be lazy because they love to relax (however this depends on other aspects) and they can be apathetic a lot. I’ve found that Tauruses can very much disconnect themselves from a situation when they have to, so they can keep calm and grounded.

🪁 Gemini: These people are social and will talk for hours. I don’t mean this in a bad way. Even the more introverted Geminis, once you get to know them they will talk for days especially about things they’re passionate about. I think it’s a cute and endearing trait. A lot of people hate on Geminis, but I don’t get it. One of my best friends is a Gemini, and she’s the most genuine person I’ve ever met. In fact, most Geminis I’ve met have not been two-faced, at least from my experience. I think that Geminis are also very funny, every Gemini I’ve met has made me laugh my ass off. Every single one. They have a great sense of humor and a very engaging personality. You can see this with Gemini politicians, they’re very charismatic and know how to entertain a crowd. I’d say the more negative side of Gemini is that they can be very flighty about what they want and while they’re social, they’re not always the best communicators when it comes to interpersonal relationships.

🪁 Cancer: I’ve found that Cancers are either extremely extroverted or extremely introverted; and this can change depending on their mood LMAO. I can speak from experience; I am a Cancer. Sometimes I feel like being social and talking; other times I hate people and I just don’t wanna deal with them. Cancers also always have a softness to them; even if they have a lot of fire energy. I don’t know how to describe it other than they just look like water itself. I’d say some obvious downsides of Cancer are that they can be extremely moody and they can be snippy. If you catch them in the wrong mood, they’ll snap at you. I’m guilty of this as well.

🪁 Leo: Again, a lot of people don’t like Leos but I love them. The Leos I’ve met have not been self centered at all- in fact they’re the exact opposite. Perhaps it’s the underdeveloped Leo suns who are self-centered, but all the ones I’ve met have always put others before themselves. They’re not cocky at all. I’ve also found that Leos all have really nice hair; this is a stereotype that’s definitely true. I’ve never met a Leo with bad hair. I’ve also found that they’re super creative and even if they don’t have a creative hobby, they have a creative flair. They’re also REALLY funny. I feel like they’re definitely slept on in terms of funny placements. This is the sign that rules “performing” in a way, so of course they’re going to be entertaining.

🪁 Virgo: My favorite sign. I love all the signs in their own way, but Virgo is my favorite. Every single Virgo I’ve met I’ve loved. I get along so well with them. Virgos are shit on for being critical but it’s because they know that the people in question can achieve so much. Virgos also save that critical energy for themselves and can tear themselves apart if they’re not perfect. These people are also always putting others before themselves and always try to help everyone. Remember the 6th house rules one’s sense of usefulness. They feel that if they’re not being useful in some way to people that they’re not good enough. I literally just want to hug every Virgo. Also they’re not boring at all. FOH. Virgos are literally so much fun.

🪁 Libra: These people are just so likable. No matter what they do, you just tend to like them for some reason. They can adapt to any type of personality and they have a way of making everyone like them. This is why Libra suns tend to be popular; they’re very bubbly and sociable. Even if they’re not popular, they’re well-liked. However, this can be their downfall as well. They can be superficial and fake. They tend to flip flop in arguments alot, and they try to play on both sides which can create more tension between two people. Also, have you ever seen a Libra try to make a decision? LMAO. Love them though.

🪁 Scorpio: Your eyes. Holy fuck. You can tell if someone is a Scorpio just by the gaze in their eyes. They stare into your fucking soul. Even if their eyes are a light color, there’s always a sense of mystery and darkness to them. Despite this sense of power they give off, once you get to know them they’re literally the biggest teddy bears. Literally just go up to one and talk to them, they’ll talk to you and be all nice and happy. I’ve noticed that Scorpios just don’t like to talk about their emotions or what goes on in their heads either. They like to look strong and they don’t show their vulnerable side to just anybody. This would be one of their downfalls. They have a hard time being vulnerable and letting people in. They look fierce, but they’re sweet and just want a hug.

🪁 Sagittarius: The funniest people ever. I’ve never met a non-funny Sagittarius. I work with two of them and they have me in tears laughing. They’re also very smart and you can talk to them about anything. Even if they don’t get the best grades in school (which I rarely see, the Valedictorian and the Salutatorian were both Sagittariuses) they always have a base knowledge about everything. They’re also extremely chill and try not to take life too seriously. I’ve found that a downside of this placement is that they can be very flighty in love. They have a hard time settling down which can be difficult for someone who wants to date them. Sagittariuses crave independence and they’re usually not the relationship types. Also they have a hard time taking things seriously.

🪁 Capricorns: My guilty pleasure. I’ve dated two of them and 75% of the people I’ve liked were Capricorn suns. I feel like people overlook the appeal of Capricorns. Scorpios are the “sexy” ones, but have you seen how attractive Capricorns can be? Remember, in Tarot, the Devil rules Capricorn, so they can be devilishly handsome or darkly beautiful. Even if they’re not the most attractive person in the room, they have an aura to them that’s intriguing. They speak softly and carry a big stick. They don’t have to impress anyone; they know that they’re powerful. I’d say some downsides to Capricorns are that they have a hard time expressing their emotions and they tend to shove them down; which can result in them exploding later on. They also have a tendency to be arrogant, and can dish it out, but they can’t take it.

🪁 Aquariuses: My second guilty pleasure. I just love the Saturn energy, what can I say? Aquariuses are such lovable weirdos. I don’t know how else to describe them. Every single one I’ve met has been unique in some way and they don’t try to fit in either. They’re proud of being different. My boss is an Aquarius and I felt self conscious one day because I had a different color shirt on than everyone else and he told me “Why would you want to fit in when you could stand out?”. They’re those types of people. They’re also really funny as well, their minds just work so differently from everyone else. They’ll say the most outlandish things and you’ll die laughing. Some downsides? You could know them for years and you’ll just find out things about them. They don’t share things about themselves and it’s hard to get to know them. They also can be very emotionally cold. They don’t like emotions.

🪁 Pisces: Softies. They’re literally soft teddy bears. No matter how big or tall or muscular they could get, you just look into their eyes and that softness is there. They’re really sweet and tend to be more introverted. They aren’t the types who go out of their way to talk to strangers at a party. They love comfort and they like to feel secure. They’re also very dreamy if that makes sense. They always look like they came out of a fantasy world. I’d say a major downside would be that they’re overly sensitive. They cannot take a joke. I remember I was telling my co worker who’s a Pisces about the negative traits of Pisces and one of them was lazy; and he got SO offended. He was like “I am NOT lazy.” LMAO.

Also guys, as I’ve said, other things in your natal chart can affect these traits. For the next asteroid by the way, I’m between asteroid Bellona and Lilith. Which one would you guys want to see? I’ve been getting a lot of questions about those two. :)

627 notes · View notes

aggravatetheaxe · 3 years ago

Note

Hey! Saw your post and saw you said you were upsettie spaghetti so I wanted to cheer you up!

Slashers who stop everything they’re doing because their “My S/O needs me” senses are tingling and go to their rescue to comfort their angry s/o?

I was hoping to come up with A way for you to get your emotions out through your writing- 😅

Hope you feel better! 🖤

I've never done a post in this style before so hopefully I do okay! I think I covered pretty much all the slashers I write for so far (I didn't do Billy Lenz because I still need to read the novelization). I may have gone way overboard, so if I do these in the future, I'll probably just pick a few instead of doing the whole roster 😅 (or you can pick for me). But doing this much work did distract me!

Above the cut:

Bo Sinclair

Vincent Sinclair

Lester Sinclair

Included below the cut:

Michael Myers (OG)

Jason Voorhees

Leslie Vernon

Thomas Hewitt

Bubba Sawyer

Brahms Heelshire

Erik ("The Phantom")

Deacon Billings (OC Ghostface)

Courtney Dwayne Delmont (OC slasher)

Kathleen Montgomery (OC slasher)

Masterlist

***

Bo Sinclair

Despite being autistic, Bo is very in tune with peoples auras and body language. He has to be to manipulate and deceive people with any modicum of success. He's trained himself when it comes to these things; even besides masking or manipulation, he needed to be keenly aware of when his parents were in Bad Moods so he could either avoid them or prepare himself.

The mood he's probably best at when it comes to this, for those reasons, is anger. He can smell anger a mile away. So if you're fuming, you better believe he notices.

At first he's annoyed and will demand to know what your problem is. He's not a very tolerant person, and he can be a bit of a hypocrite. He's allowed to have big, messy feelings, but when it comes to others having big, messy feelings ... he's not so comfortable with that. He gets overwhelmed.

Once he realizes that this is more than an attitude problem, he'll take it much more seriously. And assuming you're not mad at him, he'll want the rundown on the whole situation from beginning to end. He wants all the dirt.

He'll let you rant, and honestly, he'd think you being this angry (when it's not directed at him, but even still sometimes) is kind of sexy. And don't expect him to shut his mouth, either; he'll be ranting right along with you, affirming you and insulting whomever/whatever you're angry about.

He doesn't wanna cuddle. He genuinely thinks you can't cuddle anger away. He'll put on some loud-ass music and let you vent your frustration however you prefer. Maybe suggest a long drive down to the lake or into town or just ... picking a direction and going. He has fantasies of running away from his anger sometimes. He knows how it is.

Depending on what you're angry about, it could definitely get to the point where he's angrier about the situation than you are. And if it really hurt you, he will not let it go as long as he lives. The best he will ever do is maintain a grudging neutrality or distance from the person/situation that made you angry.

He's very protective. If you're angry at someone you need to maintain a relationship with, you're going to have to keep an eye on Bo to make sure he doesn't deliver revenge for you behind your back. If it's something he can solve, he'll do it, so if you don't want him running his mouth, watch him.

Vincent Sinclair

Vincent is in the same boat as Bo when it comes to sensing auras, though his handle on body language and facial expressions is not as keenly honed. While Vincent was not physically abused as brutally or as often as Bo, this wasn't because of some sterling quality he had that Bo lacked. He was always The Good One because he saw what his parents did to The Bad One and knew he needed to protect himself. He tried not to do anything that might provoke his parents.

You can feel anger before a fight like you smell ozone before a storm. Vincent is attuned to the feeling not just because of his parents but because of Bo's temper, too. Because of this, like Bo, he can very accurately sense anger in particular.

His initial reaction is to observe you, gauging if you need time to cool off. If you need space, Vincent is the Sinclair for you. He's used to being quiet and deflecting and riding out anger.

However, once he realizes that your anger is not directed at him or isn't explosive enough to become a problem for him, he's concerned. Rather than asking what happened, he will ask if you're okay, and leave it up to you whether you'll tell him about it or not.

If you vent, he'll sit and listen patiently, maybe even thoughtfully working on a sculpture while you rant. He's not judgemental and he can be very emotional himself, so you could say the most ridiculous, dramatic things and he wouldn't even bat an eye. Let out all your messy, destructive thoughts and feelings. Just try not to throw or punch anything; that's when he shuts down.

If you decide you just want comfort, or decide you need comfort after ranting, art is his first suggestion. It may seem cold to you at first, that his instinct isn't to hold you or kiss you but rather to redirect you to a project - once you got to know him, however, you'd know that's his most genuine way to show he cares. Redirecting to something creative calms him down more than platitudes ever could, and he wants that for you. He's nonjudgmental about the art you create as well, even if it's objectively terrible. It's not about the quality.

He won't turn you down if you need physical affection, however. His twin is extremely tactile, so it wouldn't be the first time he held someone after a breakdown. He prefers to do this if he's certain you won't lash out physically, but if you were in a really bad way and needed to be touched, he'd do it regardless.

Lester Sinclair

Lester witnessed his parents' anger, but it was usually indirectly; if Bo was the Bad One and Vincent was the Good One, he was the Overlooked One. He's not a perfect person, probably not even a good person, but of the three brothers, he's the most normally socialized. He isn't trained to be tuned into everyone's every shifting mood in order to survive.

It takes Lester a little longer to pick up on your anger than his brothers, but not too much longer. It takes him a couple tries at trying to talk to you or get your attention before he realizes something is really wrong.

His first reaction is to get upset. He soaks up emotions like a little sponge, so he's suddenly cranky, too. He also jumps to conclusions and assumes that you're angry with him, and he does not take rejection well. He might be bitter and passive aggressive. You being angry just makes him want to go in another room and not be around you, and yet at the same time, he wants your reassurances. It's messy and sad.

Once he realizes - either through observing you or through you communicating with him - that you're mad at another person or situation, then he'll feel comfortable enough to approach you and ask you about it. You'll definitely need to reassure him that you're not mad at him though.

If you wanna rant, he'll take you on a long drive and let you vent your heart out to him. He won't be quite as aggressive as Bo, but he'll be on your side, frowning with disapproval, telling you "Ya can't fix stupid." If you want only comfort or need comfort after venting, he feels much more equipped for that. He'll put something relaxing in the VHS or let you play his old Super Nintendo, get you a beer, just let you chill out. And he'll let you win at Doctor Mario.

If the situation is something really serious, you best believe he'll be talking to his brothers about it the second he gets a chance. He may be a sweet guy, but he can be real nasty, and he doesn't fuck around when it comes to you. You might have to keep an eye out to make sure he doesn't tell someone off or punch out someone's lights.

Michael Myers (OG)

In 1978, Michael is not very in tune with any emotions besides fear, and even then he only really understands it in an abstract way, as his condition and upbringing haven't really been conducive to him learning about emotions. Unless you're screaming in terror, have tears running down your face, or are shouting angrily, he really can't read your moods. Without any obvious change to how you normally act or look, there's a huge chance he might just not notice if you're angry. He spends a lot of time in his own little world.

In 2018, even though he's spent over 50 years institutionalized, Michael has had time to take in the world, and he's seen a lot more. He understands fear much more than he did when he was 21, but what he understands most of all is anger. His anger fuels him. He would pick up on yours right away and be curious, though he wouldn't verbalize it.

If you tell him how you feel, he'll take note of it. If he witnesses you doing something destructive because of your anger, he'll simply observe. He would be fascinated with this thing you're doing, because it's not something you normally do, and though he might not notice emotions, he certainly notices routine and pattern. Either way, you'll have to tell him how you feel, because he'll simply watch you otherwise.

One thing that can be said for Michael is that he's a good listener. He may not internalize everything you say, but he will remember what he thinks is important. You may be surprised; he may remember tiny little details that seem inconsequential to you but loom large in his mind.

Unless you were caused serious physical or mental harm, he would not be angry on your behalf. He would, however, do nothing to assuage your anger. He thinks it would be kinda neat and interesting to see you snap. He's not 100% sure why you don't just do it.

In 1978, he won't be much help beyond listening to you, but he would be curious to see what you do to vent your anger. You may find him by your side more often, observing you. He may also want to find and observe the object of your anger, especially if it's a person. In 2018, he would, in his own way, suggest you solve the problem by murdering someone/something. He's insatiable, but killing is the closest he's ever come to satisfaction. You should try it.

Jason Voorhees

Out of all of the slashers, Jason is the most likely to actually literally sense your anger, especially if you're psychically sensitive/powerful like Tina Shepard. I'm talkin'—assuming you have a pre-established relationship—he'll be doing something else and just get this itch that tells him you're out there somewhere, pissed off.

Obviously this is untenable. As long as he's not super busy or Pamela has other plans, Jason will stomp his way through the woods to get back to you, regardless of the urgency of your anger. If Pamela doesn't approve, well, he'll let a little anger go and assume you're okay. If he suspects you may be in danger, though, he's sprinting regardless of what Mom says. There's time for both things, Ma!

The first thing he'll do when he returns to you is scan your dwelling, then you, making sure nothing is broken. At that point, you'd probably be able to sense his confusion even without him signing. Jason doesn't experience emotions quite like a human anymore, and he's quite tactile besides, so a lack of tangible or visible clues as to why you're upset would trip him up for a second.

He doesn't want to comfort you at first, he wants to know what's wrong. He'll listen to you vent only long enough to understand the situation and identify his target. His immediate next move would be to eliminate the problem. You'll definitely have to hold him back, and it may take a bit of convincing. Earthly consequences don't really apply to him.

Before comfort comes blowing off steam, for you and for him. His first choices would be mangling some trees (you can pretend it's for firewood) or skipping/throwing stones into the lake. You're welcome to join him if those things calm you down; watching him get his stone to skip like 11 times on Crystal Lake may make you feel better, at least.

You might hang out there for hours before he suddenly decides it's time to go home. He'll do what he can to make your comfortable or stay out of your way while you make yourself comfortable, then comfort you as you please. His go-to choice is always foot or hand massages.

Leslie Vernon

Leslie is extremely observant and surprisingly analytical given how silly he is in the day to day. His intuition makes it pretty easy for him to read people, but especially you, since you two are so close. Especially-especially if you're his Survivor Girl (gender neutral term of course). You two are in sync, so he knows if something's up. Maybe even before you fully figure it out.

God, you're so hot when you're angry, you really are. He almost wants to let you scream and holler and go nuts. But he prefers you only get angry like that at him, especially if you're his Survivor Girl, so his first move is to comfort you or talk you down to a place where you can be comforted. He'll speak to you calmly and rationally, reassuring you and touching you if you wanna be touched—on your upper arms or shoulders or face, or with one arm around your back.

He doesn't just want to comfort you, though, he wants to calm you down enough that you can tell him what happened. Even if you claim you don't want to talk about it, he will coax it out of you eventually. He's gotta know what got you so upset. It's his business to know everything about you!

Assuming you're angry at someone/something that isn't him, he'll talk it through with you. If you're upset about an argument with someone, he has the capacity to see it from the other side, but ultimately, he's there for you. He'll let you bitch as much as you want, still touching you, and he'll be disgusted and/or disappointed with the situation.

Above all, though, what he wants is to see you smile again. The only worries on your mind should be the ones he comes up with, and man, he's not even halfway done grooming the next batch of unlucky teenagers. He'd pat your face or touch your hair and tell you to cheer up, and probably defuse the situation with a stupid quip or joke. Take you out somewhere fun, maybe.

Once you were cheered up, he'd humbly suggest you solve your problem with a little murder. "I mean, I know killing's not really your thing—you're really good at it, though, a talent! You know that..." Pause, considering you. "You want me to do it? 'Cause I can clear my schedule for the rest of the night." If you decline, he'd be like "Suit yourself" but may or may not still murder whoever upset you. If you agree, he'd be super excited to make a romantic night of it. His mind would be going a million miles an hour planning everything out.

Thomas Hewitt

Tommy knows anger when he sees it. Not only does he have loads of internalized anger, he's been on the receiving end of it plenty. He's far too large to be scared of anyone in a physical sense anymore, but he's been shouted at countless times. To know when to shut up and do as he's told versus arguing back, he's learned to gauge intensity and direction of anger, and he well knows that anger can be redirected to him.

So, he instantly recognizes your mood, but it might be a while before he approaches you. When he does approach, he'll let you decide what to do, whether that's throwing your arms around him or banging your fists on his chest to vent your anger. You won't hurt him.

Eventually, once you're all hugged or cried or screamed out, he'll wrap his arms around you and give you a reassuring squeeze. There's no need to tell Tommy what's wrong—he won't ask unless you're obviously in serious distress or injured—but if you decide to speak, he'll listen, brows drawn tightly the whole time. He's thoughtful about the situation.

If you're mad at someone in his family, there isn't much he can do for you besides comfort you and assure you that whoever upset you—Hoyt, probably—didn't mean what they said. If you were hurt physically, it would be another story, but his family gets in shouting matches all the time.

Rather than offering help, he'd wait for you to request it of him. Whatever you ask, shy of hurting his family, he will do. Murder someone? No problem. Make you some food? You got it. Bring you a blanket? Sure. Give you some quiet alone time? That's fine, too.

If you need to vent, he's got plenty of ways to get out your frustration. Plenty of farm work to do, or you could work on something around the house with him. He might suggest knitting or sewing or some other handicraft you enjoy. It always makes him feel better to buckle down and use his hands for something.

If you're still preoccupied/upset by the time you two bed down, or heaven forbid the next morning, then he starts taking it more seriously. Something that disturbs you for that long is bad news. He'll watch you carefully the next couple days to see how you're doing, waiting for you to need him for something.

Bubba Sawyer

Like Tommy, Bubba has been on the receiving end of anger many, many times, so he's familiar with what it looks and feels like. Despite his size, he's still susceptible to physical violence at the hands of his loved ones, so he's very wary of anger.

However, he doesn't have a female presence in his life like Luda Mae, who expresses her anger through passive aggression—so, he's more used to shouting and screaming. If you aren't prone to screaming and shouting, it might take a little bit for him to realize you're not just sad or upset, you're angry.

Bubba will be over you. He'd give anyone else their space because he'd be afraid of retaliation, but you're his special person, and he's pretty sure you're not going to hurt him. He'll touch your hair, your arms, your wrists; he'll babble as he tries to figure out what's wrong. He just wants to comfort you and let you know everything is all right.

If it's too much or you're overwhelmed and you snap at him, he'll ease back. He'll blubber like a kicked puppy, but he won't give up. He'll still try to comfort you, just in other ways, such as getting you a comfort item or article of clothing, or maybe some food. And boy will he helicopter.

There's no need to tell Bubba what's wrong. In fact, it might be better if you didn't; if it's something he can't fix, it would do nothing but majorly stress him out. If it was one of his family members who upset you, as with Tommy, he wouldn't be able to do much. Even if you were hurt, he's just not in a position to stand up for you. That fact would absolutely kill him, though. He'd end up getting even more upset than you.

He doesn't know what help to offer you beyond comfort, but like Tommy, if you requested something specific, he'd try to carry out your wishes. He'll also try to cheer you up with some music and dancing, or just being silly like you like.

Need to blow off steam? He's got plenty of coping mechanisms! Bubba's idea of a perfect de-stress session is turning up the radio and getting lost in crafts. He's got lots of supplies, mostly to create clothing and accessories, and you're special, so you can have your pick. A drive and the radio might be nice, too. If neither of those appeal to you, he'll try cooking or baking with you. He loves sharing the kitchen with someone.

If none of that works and you're still upset, be prepared, because he's gonna be an anxious mess until you're better.

Brahms Heelshire

Brahms is somewhat familiar with other people's anger. He certainly has a whole fountain of internalized anger brewing just beneath the surface, but that's different. He knows that when Mummy is angry, she yells and cries, and when Daddy is angry, he seethes and stews. The former would be obvious to him, but the latter would take him a few minutes to be quite sure about. You're not acting how you usually do. Are you being stern or are you angry? Are you cross with him?

He does not have a lot of empathy for other people, so if your anger gets in the way of his routine or the attention he wants, he'll be irked, cranky, sad. Not necessarily at you—though that is possible—but the situation in which you find yourselves.

Much like Bo, he's allowed to have big, messy feelings, but it makes him uncomfortable and scared when other people have those feelings. He might even hide from you for a while, especially if you screamed and cried.

Once he realizes something is really wrong and you're not mad at him, however, he'll start thinking of ways to cheer you up so things can go back to normal. He hates having his routine interrupted; he's very particular. And he cares for you, so seeing you in distress is very scary and uncomfortable for him.

He'll start by fetching you something you like—something manageable for him like your favorite juice or a sandwich, or if you have a special item or article of clothing, that. He's quite shy, though, and like I said, he'll probably be hiding, so he'll leave it somewhere he knows you'll find it (on the bed, outside your door, on your desk, etc.)

If that doesn't calm you down and your anger is really getting in the way of his routine, or otherwise making him uncomfortable, he'll finally make an appearance. Very bashful and timid at first, using his little boy voice. "What's wrong, Y/N? Did something bad happen?"

If it's something that can't be helped, he'll suggest you do something together to take your mind off it (most likely something he likes to do). He may even be coaxed into taking a walk around the grounds, though he doesn't like to leave the manor at all, so you'd have to convince him. He prefers quiet playtime, maybe some coloring books or loud music to vent your emotions. It would intrigue him to see someone else use his toys to calm down. As long as you recognized he was being very nice, sharing them.

If it was an argument you had with someone, he would want more information. Are they likely to leave you alone, or will they come to the manor? Will he have to deal with them? Because it's scary, but he'll do it for you.

If, for some reason, none of those things work, he may cry or throw a fit. Either way, he'll be frustrated. Adult Brahms may make an appearance and try to help you in more Adult ways.

Erik

Though he lives five cellars beneath an opera house now, Erik hasn't always been entirely reclusive. Even these days, when he can stomach it, he sometimes goes out to see the world. As a younger man, he observed people's lives and moods with a hungry fascination (that has now mostly been replaced by melancholy and longing and bitter anger). Like several of the other slashers here, he's had to train himself to sense fury to protect himself. He's also incredibly wrathful, so you could call him an expert!

He has a very keenly honed sense when it comes to you specifically, since he's watched you so much. He notices the change in your demeanor immediately.

If you know him as the "Angel of Music," his voice will appear to you once you're alone, asking you what's wrong and assuring you you can confide in him—he will insist you tell him, though. "There are to be no secrets between us, Y/N." He will listen without interjection as you vent your heart out, and when you're done, soothe you. Don't let his calming voice deceive you, though; behind that mirror, he's seething, planning to take matters into his own hands.

If you know him as Erik, he will go to you the second he recognizes the shift in your mood and take you from what you're doing, regardless of your wishes. He'll sit you down, kneeling before you with your hands in his, and gaze into your eyes, imploring you to tell him what's wrong. He'll absolutely allow you physical comfort, but he will also absolutely insist you tell. He'll need reassurance that you're not angry at him, because that thought would break his heart.

He will let you vent however you wish. You could have the most dramatic breakdown ever—throwing things, beating your fists on his chest, wailing—and he wouldn't judge you. He would be awfully concerned, though.

Will be 110% on your side. You are his poor little meow meow. "My poor love, my poor Y/N!" He is beside himself with sympathy for you and you only, and is very offended on your behalf.

He will always suggest music as an outlet for your anger, but he will have taken note of your other hobbies and interests as well. He'll fetch your things for you without being asked, as long as it won't separate him from you for very long. If you'd rather just have comfort, that's fine, too. He could hold your hand and caress your face for hours on end under normal circumstances, so no problem there. He may also suggest a little time on the surface, if you normally live in his home. Fresh air will do you both good, he reasons, and he enjoys spending time with you where others can witness it. It fills him with pride and love.

Otherwise, he's at your service for any other soothing activities you need. A calming bath, some sweets, shopping, anything. Perhaps avoid asking for any sexual contact, however. First of all, being asked directly makes him very skittish and nervous; second of all, his method of love-making (when you can coax him) is very intimate and tender, which may be tedious if you're in an angry mood.

Unless the situation is extremely serious or dire, his first priority is making sure you're soothed. Once that duty is fulfilled, however, he is absolutely angrier about it than you are. If it's not that serious, he won't skip straight to killing, if only because he knows it upsets you. He will definitely be writing an extremely strongly worded letter, however. If someone slighted you seriously, they're getting threatened. If someone hurt you physically, they're meeting the Punjab lasso.

Deacon Billings (OC Ghostface)

Deacon definitely knows when people are angry. His step-mom was a passive-aggressive laundry-folder and his dad was a storming out of the house kinda guy; when the two of them were together, they were all hushed but heated arguments at night when they thought he couldn't hear them, or else extremely embarrassing passive-aggressive arguments in public. Growing up, he found himself around a lot of angry people. And there's no shortage of anger in him, either.

So yeah, Deacon knows when people are pissed, and he knows when people are pissed at him. The thing is, he just thinks it's fucking hilarious. He was that kid that would goad peers and teachers just to be an asshole and had virtually no friends as a result. He's a menace on the internet, too: a horrible troll for no reason, stirring the pot even when he doesn't have a stake in the argument. He's trained himself to find people's weak spots so he can strike at them. He does it to make himself feel more in control of his life and his own anger.

So when you're ticked off, he's gonna notice the change immediately. If you made a vent post on social media, he probably knows you're angry before you even see him. He follows all your social media (even if you don't realize it) and checks it constantly. He'd call you out of curiosity to ask what happened. He's open about his stalking tendencies: "I saw your post, babe, who do I need to stab?"

If you otherwise come home angry, he'll be up on his feet, following you around the house and pestering you, trying to get you to tell him what's wrong. If you try to hug him, he won't push you away, but he'll be distracted, trying to needle answers out of you the whole time.

There's no question in his mind as to whether or not you're angry at him. He just assumes you're not; he has a pretty good handle on how you act when you're angry at him specifically.

He'll let you rant all day if you want. You could talk about the shit that's pissed you off for hours and he'd still listen. Outwardly, he might poke you a bit and play devil's advocate for the other side of the argument, if there is one. This is purely for the purposes of being a little shit.

Internally, he's already going down his pre-murder checklist. If it was someone at work, they're dead. Someone in the neighborhood, dead. Online? It'll take a couple days, but they're dead. Even if you're not angry at anyone in particular, just a situation, he'll find someone to menace. He'd walk through fire for your approval.

He's not good with soft, emotional comfort, so instead he'll try to think of something to help you let off steam. His go-to is something competitive, especially if it involves you chasing each other. A Nerf or water gun war, a PVP game with you on opposite sides. He'll put up a good fight, but you always kick his ass.

Once the immediate situation is addressed and you've ranted your heart out to him, he can't keep his hands off you. "Seeing you all pissed off drives me crazyyyyyy." He's grinning, brown eyes sparkling. "Come onnnnn ... I'll get it off your mind!"

Courtney Dwayne Delmont (OC)

Courtney is a hunter of all manner of game, so he's used to interpreting non-verbal cues and body language—when an animal is in distress, when an animal is about to attack, etc. His grandfather was a very angry man, as well, in a simmering sort of way. He would seethe about something before suddenly delivering one decisive strike. Courtney himself is not a particularly angry man, unless some prey is really giving him a hard time, but he can read your body.

If you come home angry, he'll stop in the middle of what he's doing and watch you, still and quiet, just confirming his suspicions. If you leave the room he's in to go collapse on the sofa or something, he'll follow you, looming over you and waiting for you to tell him what's wrong. He's patient.

If you want to vent, he'll sit and listen thoughtfully, doing something with his hands while you speak—probably cleaning his gun or some other weapon. He doesn't look at you. He wouldn't demand greater context to the situation but he would ask "Why?" and "Who?" until he understood Enough.

If you want comfort, he'll sprawl on the couch and let you lay on top of him. He'll probably pull a blanket on top of you to try and encourage a nap. If the nap doesn't make you feel better, he's feeding you protein. Do you like homemade jerky?

Sex is also on the table (not literally ... unless). He's found it's a great way to blow off steam, and he's more than happy to make all worries, troubles, and other thoughts go away for a little bit. Expect that to be the rest of your night, though, because he doesn't do quickies.

Generally, he trusts you to handle your own shit, so he would be more focused on you than whatever made you feel the way you do. However, if days passed and you were still angry/upset/sad, or if it plunged you into a breakdown or was an otherwise extremely serious situation ... just give him a target. It's up to you, but if you tell him to take the shot, it'll be quick and clean. If you're unable to make the decision, he'll decide for you without hesitation.

Kathleen Montgomery (OC)

I'm still developing her so this one won't be as in-depth and is subject to change.

Kath makes it her business to know everything about you. Chances are she's seen you explode screaming while stalking you ... chances are, if you've been in a relationship for a while, she's made you explode screaming. She knows what you look like when you're angry. Besides, she's strong for her size, but she often has to take down people who are much bigger and stronger than her; she uses manipulation and trickery to help ease that divide, so she's good at reading people.

Like Deacon, she also monitors all your social media, so if you made a vent post, she already knows you're in a shitty mood before you come home. Unlike Deacon, she doesn't tell you how she knows, so you're left to assume she's just all knowing. Considering her god complex, that works for her.

She'd probably text you to come home, and she expects you to answer. If you're unable to come home, she'll call you to ask what's wrong.

Once you're together, she wants to know everything about the situation. Even as you're speaking, she's already on her phone or laptop, looking up the people involved. Instead of getting mad on your behalf, she laughs. She's a fan of emphasizing how pathetic or weak the opposition is.

She takes your feelings on the subject seriously, but everyone else in the situation? Insects. Not even worthy of your time or concern, let alone hers. You're obviously in the right here (even if you're not). She'll tell you as much, and say some pretty intense, over-the-line things about whomever/whatever you're angry at.

Overall, however, she's calm and collected about the situation. Your bout of anger is a chance to get you to be reckless with her. She'll do your hair and makeup and dress you up nice, then take you out. Fast driving, drinking, baiting people at bars, menacing neighborhoods ... maybe a little killing, if you'd like.

***

Masterlist

425 notes · View notes

saphirered · 2 years ago

Note

I'm not sure if you still write for the Witcher, but if so may I ask for jaskier and stories with a side order of fluff? Xxxx

Still am! Hope you enjoy this one! 😘

The tavern of yet another worse-for-wear village is more crowded than it probably ever has been. As it should be for the esteemed bard has made his presence known. The latest adventures of a certain witcher took him to this town to collect on the details he is particularly short on. No better way to collect them from the people that witnessed the slaying of yet another monster. Jaskier wouldn’t deliberately put himself in that cursed lair. What might he muck do to his brand new and freshly polished boots! Or maybe Geralt just shouted at him yet again to piss off and grumpy as he gets Jaskier felt discouraged. Good think this company wants him, cheers him on and applauds him for his songs and stories as the grand performer he is. They hang onto his every word, they laugh and cry as he expresses his creations based on the stories of an ungrateful prick who of course will come around in time once he needs company once more. For now Jaskier is perfectly content here. Perfectly… content…

Collecting the accounts of witnesses for details he might not otherwise have gotten is useful but it is also tedious. Many a witness were willing to share after a few of his songs, of course wishing nothing but tone the inspiration of the great bard! But he’d provide ale to loosen their lips and perhaps let them forget about the ridiculous amount of coin some of theme expected for their statements. He’d sit with them, drink jolly and pretend to be as drunk as they, pretend to be friendly. The latter didn’t take too much pretending because he’s a man of the people after all. But that doesn’t mean he doesn’t get annoyed with it after a couple of hours. Another testimony collected, another report to scribble down and collect for his next song. He’s already got some ideas but the pounding headache leaves the muses at bay.

“Tough night?” Your voice perks up. You carry your platter in one hand and collect the empty mugs from the table.

“Tough day.” Jaskier rubs his face as he takes a deep breath and looks up at you. He’s sure his mental exhaustion shows on his face and in that moment he’s thankful for the alcove table you provided him with so no others will see him out of his element. People might talk. He’s as equally thankful you have been serving him with anything but ale, while his companions gorged themselves in drink. You’d been a blessing and quite frankly, the only reason he thought it even worth coming back to this place.

You smile at him and take off with the empty tankards, setting them to be washed. You leave through the side, and Jaskier watches you go, curious to see where you went, what you’re up to. It seems so easy to focus just on you instead of his surroundings. His attention so naturally gravitates towards you. He knows exactly why. He’s experienced it many times before. This is what attraction looks and feels like and he relishes in it. Normally he might have indulged fast, given into the charm and desire for affection, admiration and pleasure but when it comes to you, you have been the only one he’s encountered in quite some time who doesn’t see him as the charming bard, the one who takes pleasure in assuring people have a good time. You don’t see him as a pretty face, or a conquest. You don’t hang into his words making heart eyes while ignoring the meaning behind them.

Instead you see Jaskier as a man with stories to tell, a desire to share them, and let his creativity bring to life what this world is made of in word, or song or tune. You see into his mind and there, laid bare are his experiences. You see him as an artist, but most of all you see him as a person. You don’t idolise him. You see the dirt beneath his boots. You see his tired eyes at the end of the day. You see his heartbreak when he is left behind and cast aside as if he were nothing but a useless tool. You see him as more than, you see him as true and treat him as such. You do not pursue him. You play with him when he plays with you and it is just that; playful. Loving you is easy and he supposes, it truly is because you are wonderful. You understand, artist or not. You may be a server in a forgotten tavern but you understand and that’s more than he could wish for. He fears that should he indulge in his usual charms, make the first move, he’d destroy that. The feeling you spark within him might disappear when that dead end affair of short lived affection outlives its usefulness or something else grasps his mind. He fears that should you disappear from his life, you might take the muses with you. You are a muse in your own right.

“Eat, drink and take a break.” You command, setting a steaming plate of food in front of him as well as a mug of ale. “People might start talking the Countess has worn you out. How is she, by the way?” Jaskier had just taken a sip of his ale and nearly spews it across the table but he wasn’t trained by the greatest of artists if he couldn’t keep his drink and avoid such a scene. He looks at you, slightly nervous but then he sees your lips pressed together to hold your laughter. You definitely noticed his response.

“The Countess is fine.” He speaks cheerily, too cheerily and you sit yourself down opposite of the bard. Even though his face says one thing, in his eyes you can see the hint of panic. You lean your elbow on the table and your chin on your fist as you study him.

“Good. That’s good because my boss wondered if we should send the bill to her estate or if you would be paying for all the drinks you’ve been offering and consuming, yourself?” You raise an eyebrow and that’s where you truly catch a deer off guard. How is he going to pay for this all? He has kind of forgotten. Usually his performances in a place deliver him enough to cover expenses but he hasn’t performed much and focussed on his stories instead. If he sends that bill to the lover that he fell out of grace with… He might better just run and never return to this place. But then he looks into your eyes and he thinks; how could he never see you again? He supposes he could ask you to come with but would you ever accept? Would you ever even consider leaving for some infatuation on his end? When he isn’t even quite sure it’s reciprocated on the same level? Your suppressed giggles pull him from his thoughts.

“What?”

“Nothing?”

“What is it? If it’s a joke I’m missing I would love to be in on it instead. Us creative minds must share our achievements after all.” He insists, trying to get his act together and instead he comes across as a fool but you don’t laugh at him for it. Your joy comes not from his discomfort or embarrassment. It comes from within. He needs not to be a jester to provide your amusement.

“I’ll share… under once condition.” You dance your fingers across the surface of the table and nonchalantly. Now this is an act Jaskier can get behind. He’s played that role many a time and to be face to face with another like it, he’s found himself enjoy it in the past, especially with you. His embarrassment fades, his worry and questions too. Even the sound of a busy tavern is drowned out in the moment.

“Ask and you shall receive, my dear.” He catches your hand and holds it, almost lovingly. If he wasn’t the overachieving charmer in this very moment he might have convinced you this was real. But you know this is just the two of you messing around. Perhaps it is because you see through, you know the difference between the bard and Jaskier. You know where his act ends and his true self begins and he knows you see it too. He’s dropped that act and allowed himself to be his admittedly still ostentatious charming self. His charm is different when it is true and not a tool to be used to entertain the masses.

“Well, I want to see what you’re working on. And not those fake drafts of the songs you’ve written solely for entertaining the keen on the eyes folks from this town to the next. I want to see true artistry, Jaskier. I want to see what your muses look like so I might learn to recognise them myself.” While you speak with the theatrics of a true actor, there is truth in your words because you know as he does; every act, every creation is a reflection of one self in the end. He admires you for it because despite the roles of others, you still undeniably relay yourself to him though it and he hangs onto your every word so much so he forgets you calling him out on his false writings to charm anyone that catches his eye when he feels particularly lonely or have some need to be sated.

“And in return?” He gives you a look as if debating.

“I’ll tell you a secret.”

“While you are a true bargainer, my dear, to show you such creations close to heart and not nearly done, should warrant more than just a singular secret.” He muses. You consider. “How about a secret I get to choose and you waver my bill?” He brings your hand to his lips and kisses the back, making sure to look you straight in the eye over your palm when he pulls away, with a look that could make any admirer of his swoon right on the spot. You simply pretend to,

“Oh, how could I refuse such charm and charisma.” You laugh at the end and Jaskier finds within himself he is genuinely enjoying himself, being challenged like he is and able to build off one another for the sake of joy own joy instead of that of the masses. His headache is long since forgotten, his food and ale too.

“Well then, what secret you choose, my humble bard? What do you wish to to uncover about my humble self?” You take your hand back and elbows on the table lean just a little closer, looking at him with the eyes of an innocent charmed lover in some cheesy play. He can almost hear the words in his mind and they bring a smile to his face.

“I want to know your story.” He decides then and there. He knows what he wants.

“My story?” You break character. The real you pokes through in your question, surprised he would ever even think of that. Why does he want your story? You are a nobody from a forgotten spot on a map. People forget you when they pass through because who would return to a place like this when they don’t have to? You were raised here, and so you will be stuck here forever. Your story is nothing but the dull life of a barkeep.

“Your story. I’ve written for many great heroes and disastrous ones too. All of them live in song and tales and they last through the ages to come. But people tend to forget, the people of those tales often are just ordinary people. That’s where stories are told. I want to know your story so I can see who you want to be.” You search his eyes for any jest or deception but you find none because within Jaskier’s heart he knows his words to be true. His intentions too because through this he might see, your own aspirations and desires and without truly asking you, fearing that you might fade from his life after, he still gets an answer to what he truly wishes to know; is there room for him in your life?

“Okay. I’ll give you my story.” You agree. The words are sincere too. No deception on your end. The smile on your face shows that you see his reasons, and even though you might not understand what he sees, you know his truth. You’ll share your story because if it brings a smile upon his face akin to the one you see now, it will be a worthy tale to you.

“Now for that secret.” The teasing charm comes back as he picks up his drink and takes a sip.

“So that secret-“ You lean in closer and so does he, as if you’re going to whisper it to him, as if it’s most incriminating, as if it could topple lives.

“Yes…” He anticipates.

“-While you were off extracting tales of heroes, I managed to convince your companions that it was an honour to share drink with a bard of such repute, such greatness and I may or may not have risen enough funds to cover your bill, and then some.” You plop a small bag of coin on the table and Jaskier looks at you as if he could kiss you. You kind of hope he would. You certainly wouldn’t refuse the affection, even if just out of curiosity, but in reality you know it’s something more. You desperately need an out, a distraction of this dead end place and he is one in human form. That’s why you see him as he is because he has nothing to hide from you, nothing to be like because you have seen it all. You’ve gotten to know the man behind the bard and you admire him as much for his tales as you do for who he is. You see him.

“You little- I could write songs and sonnets about you and still they would do your deviousness injustice.” He gasps and laughs and looks at you proudly.

“Well, I have been paying attention to your magnificence and might have picked up on a thing or two.” You shrug jokingly.

“A wonderful student then. With great promise. You are meant for the crowds, my dear.”

“Perhaps you could show me sometime? The crowds? If you want to-“ You spoke before you thought and find yourself rambling but then you feel his hand over your own and squeeze lightly and your worries fall away. You see him smile, genuinely smile.

“I would love nothing more.” To whatever stories might come in the future, you don’t know. What Jaskier does know, your story is a significant one to him, and in his life, now that you are willing to share, even if just for a while, you’ll get to tell stories together. That is the blessing of muses.

#witcher x reader #the witcher x reader #the witcher x you #jaskier x reader #jaskier x you #the witcher #the witcher netflix #witcher netflix #jaskier #julian alfred pankratz #the witcher x y/n #witcher

39 notes · View notes

goldengoddess · 3 years ago

Text

best part of me, sunshine

pairing: kaz brekker x reader

request: your work is literal art! the way you write kaz is so endearing. i was gonna request - if you’re up for it - a reader who’s a literal ray of sunshine as a human being and kaz being his moody self and their interactions whilst in a developed relationship. you can totally be creative with this one and you’re amazing!! :D

a/n: i got SO outta hand with this only bc i totally projected bc this is the kinda person i am LMAO also THIS IS TOTALLY MY FAVORITE TROPE OR RELATIONSHIP DYNAMIC best best thing ever anon thank you for this request i hope u like it! and thank u so much ur so freaking kind

warnings: some angst? like kinda in the middle? basically kaz getting into a mood and taking it out on the reader a little bit but HAPPY ENDINGS PEOPLE

you were the best part of him

he knew it

you knew it

everyone around him knew it

your energy, the pure light you brought into the world, was the best part of kaz’s life

no one was sure when the two of you became a ‘thing’

one day you were just there

to kaz there was before and after you

and frankly he didn’t really care about the before

he just cared about you

but kaz was, well, kaz

he wasn’t exactly the most, um como se dice, easy to get along with person

but you never seemed to mind

your extroverted ‘i get along and love every person i meet’ personality had won him over the way it won over everyone else

and though the two of you were quiet literally the opposites attract theory, it worked

it worked really well

kaz had his moods

but they never seemed to bring you down

he’d stand in the corner of the crow club

broody and observant

and you would gracefully move through the crowd

and he’d watch as you talked with total strangers

and when you bid them goodbye they would be left smiling, or blushing, sometimes both

he couldn’t deny your affect on people

you made business boom

everyone loved your energy

and when they found of you were kaz’s they would laugh and shake their head in disbelief

you’d come up to him during a busy night and tug at his sleep

“kaz! theres a man over there who sells goats! actual goats! he was telling me all about it, i think we should get one? what do you think? kind of like a mascot, oh wait! maybe we should get a crow instead?”

he’d listen to you ramble and find himself leaning your way

soaking in your warmth

the corners of his lips involuntary tugging upwards the way they always did when you spoke

you’d drag him along occasionally

to meet someone particularly interesting

or meet a surprisingly cute goat named milo

sometimes he’d even enjoy being at your side

he liked how you showed him off like he was something to be proud of you

because you were

proud of him

proud to be his

proud that the two of you could love each other

you’d make the best comments to him throughout the night

whispered into his ear of course

“nina told me this woman actually came here from ravka! saints i’d love to go”

“kaz she is just so pretty! maybe i should dye my hair like that? what do you think? could be fun! oh you should totally do it with me.”

you filled his days in a way he didn’t know was possible

in return he slowed you down

you were sunshine, as the poets might like to say

and you were in constant motion

always trying to be active and helping others

always smiling

sometimes, even at the expense of your own well being and peace

you’d be up early, earlier than even kaz, busying yourself around his room or the slat

and you’d walk up to his bed as he woke up,

and you would be so tired, exhausted even

but you’d smile down at kaz

“can we just lie here for a bit?” he would ask

you’d let out a breath of relief

because he knew

that you were pushing your limits

and you’d lay next to him

fingertips brushing against each other

just for a few minutes

he knew the ways to make you recharge

so your sunshine personality was genuine and not faked

some days were decidedly not so great

kaz’s moods could be turbulent

he never meant to let them affect his attitude towards you

but kaz had suffered through hell, multiple times

and it just took over some days

you could brush certain things of

but then he’d push you away when you attempted to make him smile or calm him down

you’d leave a comforting hand on his shoulder, the way you always did

as he’d recoil

“saints, can you go do anything else” he would growl

or when he really needed to fight he’d yell something along the lines of: “you are not helping! you’re too much right now.”

and you’d flinch at his words

and he would regret them immediately

you’d stick your chin up higher and make your way towards the door

“kaz, i know you’re hurting right now. i’ll give you space, even though i don’t think you really want that. but this is how i am. i am happy. i am comforting. i will not let you make me feel less than for that.”

and you’d slam the door, hurrying to your room so you could breathe

kaz would follow you

his bad mood gone and replaced with deep deep shame

he never meant any of the things he said to you when he got into a mood, never

and you were right, he wanted to you there always

but another part of him pushed and pushed

he’d knock on your door the way he always did after he said something much too cruel for you

you’d open it, with your soft, beautiful, sympathetic smile

“you ready to stop acting so much like a teenager and talk to me?” you would ask, hand on your hip

he would nod and give you an actual smile, just to make up for everything

everything would be good by the end of the night

the air smelling of kaz’s favorite candle and your head on his shoulder as you recounted your day to him

everyone had, fittingly, dubbed you ‘sunshine’

you heard it even more than you heard your name at this point

to kaz, you were still angel

you always would be

but occasionally he’d throw in your most common pet name

like when you came up to him

buzzing with energy

all giggly and glowing

and leave quick kisses all over his face

excited and bubbling with joy and love for him

and he would just be blown away by you once again

how something so undeniably good could exist in this hellish city

he’d grab your face and a smile would tug at his lips

“you are the best part of me, sunshine” he would tell you

and kiss your forehead before walking off

unknowingly, leaving you with more happiness in your chest than usual

#kaz brekker #kaz brekker x oc #kaz brekker x reader #kaz brekker headcanons #kaz brekker x y/n #kaz brekker fic #kaz brekker x you #kaz brekker imagine #shadow and bone #six of crows #grishaverse #jesper fahey #six of crows imagine #grisha #nina zenik #leigh bardugo

593 notes · View notes

lfc21 · 3 years ago

Text

Work stress

A relationship. That was the one thing any girl urged to have, something that was worth the world. A relationship was a bundle of love between two people who have the possibility and power to take on the universe as one. No one needs the big dates with fancy clothes and expensive drinks but it dosent hurt to have the odd few, does it? You where in awe of kostas and had no doubt in your mind that this wouldnt be something to make countless memories from. The days together where yours to decided upon and create with love and affection. None of this was planned but it held such spontaneous beauty and lust.

Today was a normal day - work, work even more and than slightly more work. Kostas hated how much you worked even though he knew how much you truly adored it. You and kostas had very similar aspirations in life and alot of them spawned from your careers. Kostas was a world and a half away from understanding what you do at work but he was always there to support and appreciate you.

"Hey love" you shouted from your office as you heard the large door shut with a bang. It was around 4 o'clock which ment kostas would be eager to get home from training, probably flying around every bend in sight upon the roads in Liverpool.

"Hello" kostas shouted back kicking off his trainers and sending them flying into the white wall (even after you warned him black marks up and down the walls was not a good look). You had no reply, your head was face first into a large book about the history of Channel. Your job to you seemed like a luxury, spending time with fashion and creating the most incredible and stylish pieces but kostas thought you spent most of your time in the pits of hell trying to think off fashion that hadn't been done before and couldn't figure out how you where ever so creative. You heard heavy footsteps running up the stairs in a hurry to reach your presence.

"There you are" kostas mumbled as he saw your small frame sat on the chair through the door frame. Your head looked up from your seat looking at the man upon your eyes. Even a few hours caused your heart to break and miss every action from the human you urged to be around.

"Hi" you mumbled with your face planted onto the palm off your hand, now copying over notes onto your laptop. Kostas's body made a straight beeline to your presence and guided his hands onto your delicate shoulders. His chin came into contact with your shoulder, inhaling ever comforting sent from you. Your head rested onto the side of his as the idea of his safety fell into your wants within your head. His warm skin was delicate on yours creating the most perfect creation of protection and intimacy.

"Are you finishing work soon?" Kostas asked with mumbles whilst his lips softly found your neck in a mission to distract you from work.

"Erm I think so give me an hour" you replied back trying to work out why half of your work team had decided to discard any idea of effort. Your team hadn't ever been this bad before. One day was spent working from home and the rest was in the office and not one of those days had they ever left you to do everything on your own.

"An hour?!" Kostas asked with a very high pitched tone due to the idea of 60 minutes without any attention from you.

"Yes an hour" you sternly said trying to get your point across whilst your eyes scanned down your contact list to find out what was going on in the place you where known to call work.

"Urrrrrrgh" kostas shouted throwing his head back in annoyance whilst looking at the huge window in your office showing the garden you both learnt to love as your own.

"Not my fault" you mumbled putting your phone against your ear letting the annoying noice run through your ear. Kostas didn't know who you where ringing and he didn't really care all he wanted was your attention and that was the last thing he was getting. Your phone finally stopped ringing and you where greeted with a very drunk and rather annoying work colleague.

"Are you for real?" You said down the phone furious at the fact someone you had hired was beginning to sack of there job to get drunk on a Thursday night. She hadn't been working with you for long, but she definitely had potential to become some what of an amazing talent but in your standards this was pathetic.

"Seriously I can't believe you, your supposed to he working" you sternly replied to her slurred words and clear lack of understanding. Kostas turned around to look at your annoyed face on the wooden desk. For the life of him he couldn't understand who had drove you mad this much.

"Ring me in the morning when your speaking sence" you replied back ending the phone call and throwing the phone onto your desk in anger. Kostas's eyes fell onto your phone and back to you with your hands in your hair wanting to pull it out.

"Who? And what was that about?" Kostas asked in shock at the sudden outburst. You looked over to him in disbelief letting out a small chuckle as you couldn't understand what was going on.

"Someone who clearly can't get there head out of drinking all night and caring more about going out than making a career" you blurted out whilst kostas wondered over to you gesturing you to stand up. You stood up not really understanding why until he pulled you down onto his lap with his large hands rested onto your hips. You turned to look at him whilst his eyes glued onto yours showing nothing but love, his love was your nutrient and it was all you could ever think about.

"I think you should tell them to fuck off" he said whilst placing his hand onto the side of your neck and guiding your lips onto his. That's all you wanted. His lips where on yours creating the most perfect mixture of love and lust.

"I'm gonna" you replied back looking at him with your hands running through his pushed back blonde hair. His hands ran up and down your back feeling every inch of your warm addicting skin.

"That's my girl" he replied back sending your cheeks to fall into a colour of redness at his pleasant words.

I hope you enjoyed this! This was a request from the amazing writer @kostasstsimikass definitely read her writings they are unreal! Please leave feedback and requests as they are greatly appreciated.

@daddyhendo @trentsko @trentshoe @robbo38 @weddingdisco @avenirdelight @nyctophilic0vitnir @smileytaa @chelseamount @chilwellsbitch @mrs-henderson @football-and-fanfics @andysrobertson @robbossidehoe @prettylittletrent @cornertakenquicklyyyy

#lfc imagines #lfc masterlist #kostas tsimikas lfc #kostas tsimikas x y/n #kostas tsimikas x reader #kostas tsimikas imagines #kostas tsimikas #konstantinos tsimikas imagines #konstantinos tsimikas #liverpool imagines

46 notes · View notes

blu-joons · 3 years ago

Text

DATING TXT A⇴Z HEADCANON ⇴ Choi Beomgyu

A ⇴ AFFECTION

Beomgyu loved to cuddle you, being close to you and being able to hold you always made him feel so warm and full of love. He’d love being as close to you as possible, even if neither of you spoke, the touch was the best part to him.

B ⇴ BEFORE DATING

The two of you crossed paths at an event that you were a member of staff at. Beomgyu instantly began talking to you in order to make you feel comfortable around the group, so you thought he was just being friendly, until he came and found you at the end of the day and asked if he could get your number.

C ⇴ CONFESSION

You both ended up meeting a handful of times over the next few weeks, trying to get to know one another. Beomgyu loved being around people and so he would often try and see you whenever he had a break in his schedule. On one particular evening you spent together, Beomgyu knew he wanted to confess to you, and so as he arrived at your front door, he opened up, and finally let you know how he felt about you.

D ⇴ DATES

Beomgyu enjoyed being around you, and so he’d arrange any kind of date in order to be around you. He loved to try new things and figure out the things that you enjoyed doing as a couple and the things you weren’t so fond of. His favourite kind of dates were adventures, Beomgyu loved exploring with you and being able to find new parts of the city that he was yet to discover. A lot of planning went into your dates, but Beomgyu always made sure that it was something you’d enjoy and want to try again with him.

E ⇴ EXPERIENCE

Dating was a field that Beomgyu didn’t know too much about at all before he met you, but he was more than willing to learn. He did a lot of research on things that he thought you’d like so that he could impress you, and things to avoid. He definitely spoke with the other members too, even though they didn’t have much experience either, getting the opinion to know whether he was right or wrong meant a lot to him. As he became less shy however, he began to trust in himself a little more, trying to do things for himself.

F ⇴ FIGHTING

Beomgyu tends to have an opinion on most things, which can sometimes lead to a few disagreements between the two of you. However, if there is one positive, he can also be very understanding, so no argument ever really gets too out of hand for you both. If he firmly believes in his opinion, he might speak a little louder, but usually he tries to treat your disagreements as discussions as opposed to conflict. He’s open to your view, even if he doesn’t always believe that it’s the right one to have, but he’ll try not to ever let things blow too far out of proportion if he can help it.

G ⇴ GETTING TO KNOW HIS FAMILY

He was incredibly keen to introduce you to his family and show them the person that he never stopped talking about. They were keen to meet you as well, which definitely placed a lot of pressure on your shoulders the first time you met them. Luckily for you, and them, your first meeting with them went perfectly.

H ⇴ HOME

Having someone around was a big deal for Beomgyu, he hated being by himself. With Soobin so busy, the two of you were lucky to have a lot of time at the dorm together by yourselves, but as soon as Soobin ever returned from a schedule, you’d make sure to both be respectful of his home and Beomgyu’s too.

I ⇴ “I LOVE YOU”

The first ‘I love you,’ came from Beomgyu, but he was so shy, you almost missed him actually saying it. You’d surprised him after a long run of shows for their comeback, and he was exhausted. Although having you there was a great source of energy for him, he still struggled to find the energy to be able to tell you how much your presence meant to him.

J ⇴ JEALOUSY

Whilst Beomgyu wasn’t someone who got jealous often, it would usually be clear to you when he was feeling a bit put out. It was a habit that not many people could pick up on of his, but you’d always notice how he’d become very unresponsive to conversation. He understood that people wanted to talk to you, so usually he’d switch off any urge to get jealous about a situation, but if something really did get under his skin, then the silence that came from him was usually a big enough habit of his for you to recognise that he needed some reassurance from you.

K ⇴ KIDS

The two of you knew from the very start of your relationship that kids were a long way off for you both. Although the future was something that the two of you did find yourself talking about quite a lot of the time, you would never go too far into the specifics of having children. Instead, you both just agreed that it was something you hoped would happen for the two of you in the future, whenever that was.

L ⇴ LAUGHTER

Beomgyu is someone who loves to laugh and make sure that those around him are always laughing too. A lot of his effort will go into making you laugh and ensuring that you’re always happy around him. At times, he definitely has a darker sense of humour, with many of his comments often taking you by surprise when you least expect him to say something. If you come to him at the end of a bad day, he’ll be right there to make you laugh, memorising plenty of jokes that he’s read that he knows will tickle you. If you’re not smiling around him, then Beomgyu will do whatever it takes to get you smiling around him again.

M ⇴ MISSING

His heart always beats a little faster whenever he’s missing you, it’s hard on him, and a feeling that for the most part, he’ll bottle up. When he rings you, he smiles, he wants you to think that he’s happy and getting by, when in reality, it’s not that easy for him at all. The members will be very quick to pick up on when he’s missing, but Beomgyu will usually try and encourage them all into thinking that he’s fine. He doesn’t like the fuss that comes with everyone thinking that he misses you, he much prefers to just get on with things so that he can head back to the hotel and give you a ring and see how you are.

N ⇴ NICKNAMES

You tended to just call Beomgyu, ‘beom,’ it was the first nickname you gave him when the two of you were getting to know each other, and so it stuck as the nickname that you always used around him.

O ⇴ OBSESSION

Beomgyu was obsessed with your smile, it was always made him feel warm inside knowing that you were happy around him.

P ⇴ PDA

He wasn’t a huge fan of being affectionate with you in public as it usually made him quite shy, but that would never stop him at least holding your hand. He still wanted people to know that you were his, without having to be over the top about it and push your relationship into people’s faces where it wasn’t wanted.

Q ⇴ QUESTIONS

Beomgyu would ask you a question about near enough anything just to keep conversation going between the two of you. He wasn’t a fan of silence at all, and so would often find something random that could trigger conversation.

R ⇴ RANDOM FACTS

He loved to play his guitar for you, and wrote many small songs dedicated to you just by what came to mind when he strummed. His creative mind was set alight whenever he had thoughts of you, suddenly making song writing seem as if it were the easiest job in the world. The lyrics seem to always just come to him when he has thoughts of you, the guitar being the perfect accompaniment to what he creates.

S ⇴ SEX

Intimacy with Beomgyu is usually a very passionate affair, but also one that is very soft and full of love. As soon as you’re finished, he’ll always revert back to his usual shy self, but whilst he’s taking care of you and making you feel good, Beomgyu makes sure that everything is how he knows you enjoy it. He understands exactly what you expect from him and makes sure to deliver every single time.

T ⇴ TEXTS

You’ll receive quite often from Beomgyu throughout your day as he loves to hear what you’re getting up to. You’ll often get texts too to let you know he has a surprise date planned for you both with his evening off.

U ⇴ UNIVERSE

The two of you were very much a team, there wasn’t much that you didn’t do together when you weren’t busy with work. You enjoyed being with each other as much as possible and making as many memories as you could.

V ⇴ VACATION

It doesn’t matter where in the world Beomgyu is when he’s got some time off, just as long as he’s got you with him. He loves travelling and exploring new parts of the world therefore, it won’t phase him at all where it is. As long as the two of you are happy on your vacation, then that’s all that matters to him.

W ⇴ WHINING

He’s very understanding and appreciates that not all your time can be spent on him, so Beomgyu won’t be someone who whines too often.

X ⇴ XXXXX

Beomgyu will kiss you as often as he can, he loves to be close to you, and embraces how every kiss he either gives or receives from you will turn his cheeks a dark shade of red. He often finds himself resting against your shoulder, which gives him perfect access to kiss against your cheek or jawline, or for you to be able to tilt your head and attack his cheeks too. He’ll do anything to be able to be close to you and give you plenty of affection.

Y ⇴ YOU

You were his best friend, he loved having you there in everything that he did.

Z ⇴ ZZZ

Beomgyu is very much a cuddler when it comes to the night-time, he loves having you close to you and being able to bury himself close to you. It always ensures that the two of you fall asleep with smiles on your faces.

---

Masterlist

263 notes · View notes