#isn’t passing enough
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I absolutely don’t like how he told me to leave, “ab chale jao” me: 😐😡 “chale jao I need to shower” me:😳☹️😢😒
BITCH 😭😫 I’ll kick your balls after suggesting to be your third ball 😂🤦♀️
#this too shall pass#isn’t passing enough#I’m#over this guy#writings#I said I loved him 🤮#not to him obviously#I thought we were leaving together#but omgggggg
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trying to casually explain katsuki’s devotion to izuku is impossible because why does it go from helping him train to RISKING HIS LIFE FOR HIM in a split second
#and it just escalates it never simmers HE KEEPS OUTDOING HIMSELF EVERY TIME#like having a quirk awakening isn’t enough he also has to think of deku when he wakes up in the hospital and fight to get to his room#AND THEN he has to apologize in the rain and call him by his first name AND catch him in his arms#AND THEN he has to panic when separated from him and dedicate his entire fight to what he’s learned… always thinking about deku#IZUKU AS HIS LAST WORD BEFORE HE DIES????#IZUKU AS THE PERSON HE NEEDS TO SEE WHEN HE REVIVES#MOTIVATING IZUKU RIGHT BEFORE HE PASSES OUT#AVOIDING MEDICAL CARE (AGAIN) TO REACH HIM#SOBBING AND DECLARING HOW HE’D LIKE THEM TO SPEND THE REST OF THEIR LIVES TOGETHER#spending 8 years to ensure izuku is by his side as a hero again…#LIKE RELAX?????????#bkdk#dkbk#bakudeku#dekubaku#:’)#ktdk
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so like… controversial opinion but… if you agree there should be more female muses or lesbians… uhh… write them?
#ooc. o kaptain.#[I totally get write what you want. but as a writer for a long long lifetime if you only write your specific niche… you will never grow as a#writer. if you only focus on what you yourself are obsessively interested in… it’s going to repel people from wanting to interact with you.#you literally can’t improve if you don’t move outside your comfort zone in a sane way. and frankly? I’m just off my ass exhausted about#going ‘man I wish I had more female muses to write with’ and getting a bunch of agreement. but no one ever actually writes women. much less#queer ones. and those of us who do just go 🙂 haha that’s nice thank you for being supportive. and it’s never going to change anything. and#that’s exhausting. but at some point? it’s honestly just so disheartening and practically upsetting that I’ve been here since I was 19 and#it has only become more and more voraciously malecentric. in a WILD way that’s completely unselfaware. half this community wouldn’t pass the#bechdel test which isn’t even a real actual thing more than the bare minimum. and frankly? as the writer of mostly female muses? it’s#shitty. it feels a lot like a consolation prize half the time just to be written with and that… sucks. I’m just talking honestly because#this? I hate it. I so hate it. it’s half the reason new interactions feel exhausting. because FINDING them is hard enough.]#negativity /#negativity in tags /
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So, uh, I’m asexual and due to that, whenever I play smash or pass with stuff my brain automatically defaults to smash=hot crush hehhe but my friends end up getting horny with it and then I’m like “oh yeah smash means… other things…”
#funny#funny shit#asexual#actually aspec#aspec#Ace#smash or pass#asexual struggles#there isn’t enough garlic bread in this life that could fix this
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it’s still wild to me that i’ve seen a lot of people say that steve harrington had a “zuko level redemption arc” and i just??
steve was a normal teenage boy and had, like, one bad day and then went “aw nuts. i should apologise.” that isn’t… anything like zuko’s redemption arc lmao.
#and this isn’t disparaging zuko’s redemption arc becuase i love him#but his arc was complex and layered and had a lot to do with abuse and it’s scars on young kids#steve did a couple shitty things and then pretty much immediately went ‘sorry 🥺’#like!!!!#it’s a character arc for sure. but it barely passes as a redemption arc imo#he just didnt have enough to redeem lmao#a few episodes of an arc and then an entire three seasons of an arc just aren’t really comparable#steve harrington#stranger things#my post
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*que Pedro Pascal edit*
This MIGHT be Barbie
#doodle doo#ateez#kim hongjoong#hongjoong#this may be the greatest stylized depiction of a human being where I think they actually look like themselves that I have ever done#I popped off on this one low key I can’t lie#my love of westerns unlocked another level of skill for this drawing#happy late birthday Catptain Hongjoong#this isn’t really meant to be a bday drawing but it’s close enough I can still sorta pass it of as one#Hongjoong has actually no right being as pretty as he is cus like what about me#I wish I was him no lie#please enjoy cus I’m happy with this one
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Uniform redesign i was bored after losing motivation on the last drawing.
Also some other hc like the robes are made out of rayon or smth lightweight n cheap idk
#my art#harry potter#art#ARCHIVISTTest… Test… Test… 1#1... 2... 3... Right#My name is Jonathan Sims. I work for the Magnus Institute#London#an organisation dedicated to academic research into the esoteric and the#paranormal. The head of the Institute#Mr. Elias Bouchard#has employed me to replace the previous Head Archivist#one Gertrude Robinson#who has recently passed away.#I have been working as a researcher at the Institute for four years now and am familiar with most of our more significant contracts and#projects. Most reach dead ends#predictably enough#as incidents of the supernatural#such as they are – and I always emphasise there are#very few genuine cases – tend to resist easy conclusions. When an investigation has gone as far as it can#it is transferred to the Archives#Now#the Institute was founded in 1818#which means that the Archive contains almost 200 years of case files at this point.#Combine that with the fact that most of the Institute prefers the ivory tower of pure academia to the complicated work of dealing with#statements or recent experiences and you have the recipe for an impeccably organised library and an absolute mess of an archive. This isn’t#necessarily a problem – modern filing and indexing systems are a real wonder#and all it#would need is a half-decent archivist to keep it in order. Gertrude Robinson was apparently not that archivist.#From where I am sitting#I can see thousands of files. Many spread loosely around the place
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ughhhh why is gender so hard to figure out. my body is like boom gender dsyorphia but won’t tell me noone about my identity
(I accidentally made an entire vent in the tags lmao)
#my gender dysorphia has been bad the past few weeks. really fucking bad#when I try to learn about my identity I get mad that I’m nowhere near becoming it or mad that I don’t know what the fuck I want to be#but I want to be more neutral and I don’t know if I want to be masculine because I want to look genderless#or if the two aren’t together#I hate this. I pick a label and there’s always something wrong with it.#demiboy is too masculine and implies I look masculine p#agender isn’t masculine enough#I can’t be genderfluid when I only want to be masc and neutral#I can’t be bigender when I don’t want to be a transman#nothing ever fits. and whether I find what fits or not the dysorphia is just gonna get worse#and my mom will think I’m a butch lesbian for years#and once those years finally pass she isn’t gonna let us leave Florida#or by then the transphobia would’ve spread across the county#and then she still wouldn’t let me leave#because I’ll always be too young. I’ll never have enough documented dysorphia.#I’ll never get on t. I’ll never get a binder or surgery.#bevause i look too feminine to be tranmasc.#because I can’t get hormones.#because my mom won’t let me.#because I haven’t had this for enough years.#because I looked too feminine before and thought that feminine things were cute#because I liked girls.#I liked how the outfits looked but never really asked if I wanted to wear them.#and when I finally did it was too late.#the answer was no. but they didn’t believe me#bc for so many years I thought because and outfit was cute or astethic meant you wanted to wear it. but I didn’t want to be seen as a girl.#I want to be masculine. I wish I was born male. but it’s too late for me to realize that.#now nobody cares what I want to be. anyone that does is across the fucking world.#anyways I’m reaching tag limit so I’ll stop this#vent
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no matter how much my life is improving, i still feel empty and alone
#i got a new job#i like it so far but i thought it would make me happier#it has a little bit i still just feel.. strange#like it isn’t enough#i’m lonely#it’s hard to make friends and i don’t know what to do anymore#i want a boyfriend#i just want someone who cares about me and accepts me#i miss freddy but he hasn’t talked to me in years#i miss the way he made me feel#i worry i’ll never have that again#its still hard to move on because i haven’t experienced anything since#i miss having friends#doing things#life is so lonely#i want to have fun#i want to go out a d have dinner or a picnic avd play in the grass and swing on swing sets#but my life is passing by and i’m still alone#and i’m sad#no matter how much money i make or clothes i buy make me feel better#i just feel worse#because it’s not meaningful#i just want to find something that gives my life meaning#i want love#i want to be in love#but i am starting to wonder if im just unlovable#anyways i’m just yapping cause i have no one to talk to
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i’m so insane about this stupid game oh my god
#i will see my mutuals get twst merch and start seething with jealousy and feeling ill#but like specifically places where it’s just out in the wild#like. if i saw a selection of twst merch just at the store i think i would pass out#i just need little diasomnia themed items to have with me or put on my bag or whatever#so people know what i am…#im going to a new school starting next week and i NEED to meet people who play twst#so i must attract them with twst items#i do have my silver nui and my malleus keychain#but that is not enough.#i need to make diasomnia my whole personality#not that it already isn’t but i need to make it clear on the outside#twst posting#diasomnia brainrot
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God I hate AI. I hate AI so much. This thing was supposed to be cool and futurey and renovate society in positive ways, and instead it’s just a giant plagarism machine. Art and creativity and actually cool shit getting all the humanity ripped out in favor of quick and easy. I fucking hate it with my whole soul. I hate the idea of AI replacing actors. I hate AI writing fiction. I hate AI trawling artists’ actual blood, sweat, and tears and bundling their hard work into a facsimile. This thing could have been so cool, and instead it’s just “how do we shut out artists of all kinds and make a quicker bigger buck in the process.” Get. So. Fucked.
#sometimes you just wake up and Rage#it’s not intelligence. it’s just theft. like. this isn’t cool robot shit it’s just boring#and sucks the heart out of all the stuff that makes humanity so awesome#we are art. good art. bad art. who cares dude! if it’s made by a person it’s neat as hell#but stealing art is stupid enough when it’s trying to pass someone else’s work off as your own#stealing art on a corporate level? fuck off dude#I’m so goddamn grouchy about this#push button: get art is not art. it’s just a button.#draw it bad! write it bad! act like you’ve never inhabited a human form in your life! at least there’s a person behind all of that
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ooooh caught my mom listening to the soundtrack, i think i’m getting her attached-also i’m talking to my aunt tmrw about when she wants to go see it!! (i’m avoiding wednesday and saturday but i’m praying friday will be available for both of us because i need to see it again i’m having palpitations)
#the outsiders#the outsiders musical#i am hoping to scrape enough together to be next to the ponyboy seat because i think i would pass out if i got to sit next to him for even#<a second#i would die on the spot#so i’m REALLY hoping that isn’t too expensive of a ticket since i wanna pay for my mom aunt and cousin#woof…advice please-
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#oc txt.#c: hattie#c: mary ellen#hattie being able to make it back to her own vault just in time to be with her mom in her final moments is 🤕#she’s not the overconfident self assured put together person she was when she left however long ago it was#and her mother isn’t the hyper independent stoic emotionally constipated woman that didn’t even hug her before she left#her mother really did believe that this colony that had supposedly been growing since she was a girl WAS her kids’ only hope at a future#they knew for years that the vault was running out of supplies and falling apart#she was getting older and really didn’t think a future above ground was for her or her husband or the other adults that had grown up there#it was for their kids.#bc the vault wasn’t going to be able to sustain them for much longer#it’s why she pushed her kids so hard and pushed them away even harder#bc it made sending them into that world ‘easier’#she wouldn’t miss them as much and they wouldn’t miss her#sending her twins up there (her first borns) years prior was HELL#and she dreaded the day hattie was old enough to be thrust out there and even debated whether or not she’d even go through with it#so seeing her now … especially in the state hattie is in when she returns#she feels guilty but at the same time proud? because despite it she knows hattie had and HAS what it takes to survive up there#and seeing tj??? she doesn’t know if the twins made it to the colony or whether the colony was even real operating ect ect#so she’d never get to see them with her grandkids if they had any#she at least gets a slice of what could have been if things were different#it’s good that hattie gets to tell her truth of everything#it’s good that hattie gets to reconcile and be the last thing she sees before she passes#it’s all mary ellen ever wanted … to see her girls again#and in her mind if hattie made it … then she knows the other two did too#and i think for hattie she was just on the cusp of giving up and throwing in the towel#but she’s got people relying on her and she’s not a quitter … was never allowed to be#and i think by now she’d be searching for them less for herself and more for her parents#the least she can do is find out if their sacrifices (and the sacrifices of everyone else) were warranted
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sighs and collapses and disintegrates into the wind
#Seven’s Public Diary#vent post#cw vent post#ah yes. another restless nights sleep in a cold room bc i was too upset and sick to eat enough yesterday and my nightmares won’t let up and#my heater isn’t enough to warm the room when it’s this fucking cold outside. but it’s fine bc i don’t think i deserve to be warmer anyway#i should get water but i’ve been stuck laying here for an hour wondering if im racist and feeling like i should just. leave. or smthn. idk#i need a caregiver so there’s someone here to stop me from doomscrolling tumblr and reddit discourse for two hours before bed. lol#but ig no matter how careful i try to be there’ll always be part of me thats. unconsciously? racist? bc im white so its just part of me#idk im not educated enough to talk about it so i guess the real lesson to learn here is to keep my fucking mouth shut. which i can do!#i don’t. know how to apologize correctly. bc no one wants to hear me piss and moan abt my white guilt. if that’s what it even is#im too stupid to understand what to do or say and the more i type the worse it sounds so im just. sorry. i apologize for anything i’ve said#or done. that wasn’t right or was insensitive or thoughtless or uneducated or. whatever else it is i rlly don’t know#i didn’t mean to use AAVE. i really didn’t know. so i’ll go edit the tag where i used it but. that’s only one example. how many more am i#unaware of? how often do i put my foot in my mouth and not know it? im sorry. i’ll try to do better#but there’s so much to be mindful of that i can’t keep track of it all and it’s overwhelming me so i think i should just. be quiet.#‘always a fanfic writer at the scene of the crime’ i. didn’t know there was a connection between racism and fanfic. now im worried#was that just an easy jab to make bc it’s cringe or is it actually problematic. why does it seem like theres smthn wrong w everything i do#anyways. i have to stop thinking abt it or im gonna anxiety vomit. i could go lay on the couch#it in the only warm room of the house but it’s covered in dog hair and i hate the smell from the stupid fucking propane heater#it gives me a headache and makes me paranoid. why did he install gas heat when he could’ve gone with a heat pump. all he did was make#everything harder on everybody. so now we have dangerous gas heat in the winter and shitty mold-filled window ac units in the summer#when he could’ve installed a heat pump/ac unit combo thingy and we would’ve been good to go. why is he like this.#YOURE A GODDAMN ELECTRICIAN. HAVE BEEN YOUR WHOLE LIFE. YOU CAN DO ANYTHING YOU WANT. SO ACT LIKE IT.#im staying in bed. the rest of the house reeks of burnt plastic bc SOMEONE decided to take FOUR sedatives and drink a couple beers before#trying to use the stove to cook dinner :))) so now i have to figure out how to clean that up. i take back everything i said about winter#being my favorite season. this shit fucking sucks. there’s so much more to stress over and it’s all so much more expensive and exhausting#i never want another dog or cat ever again after these two pass. im not the person i once was and i cannot care for them like i used to.#i can’t even care for myself. couldn’t if i Wanted to right now bc everything is frozen solid. can’t shower. can’t do any laundry.#just get to sit here filthy cold and miserable in the one clean-ish sweater i have left for ? days until temps get back above freezing#anyways thats enough bitching abt my first world problems. time to shut up and be grateful for what i Do have bc it could be a Lot worse
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Finally properly sobbing after not being able to cry all day is such a great feeling
#long distance is actually so terrible I’m dying over here#you might be like ‘anne you’ve been in an ldr for three years now how are you not used to it?’#and the answer is that the pain gets worse every time! and the most annoying thing is that usually it peaks the first night apart and goes#easier from there; but if my mental health is bad enough in other areas it will stick around for up to two weeks which I can already tell i#happening. so that’s good#and as you may remember from me posting about it; things were a little rocky for a while because of my OCD as well as me just being a#terrible person. not really; I need to speak to myself with kindness#but also I think I’m just a bad person. like just through and through not a good person#not that I really think good or bad people exist it’s just everyone does some harm and some good and you can’t nearly divide that into good#or bad#or at least that’s what I tell myself when I think back on the shitty things I’ve done#which is a lot.#but long story short my idiocy did not cause them to dump me even though they easily could have#anyway fuck I just miss my partner and it’s unfair they’re not holding me in this moment#now I just have to keep making amends and working on myself so I don’t do it in the future. I didn’t cheat if anyone’s wondering; I feel#we’re gonna call later anyway so hopefully that will help. and I do feel better for sobbing#like that’s always my assumption when other people blog like this lol#apologies for the tag rant but it is my own post lol#this isn’t even mentioning my academic stress because that does feel secondary to the everything else#because I think I get like a camouflage worry where my brain will tell me I’m freaking out about school#but really it’s a cover for the really painful stuff underneath#anyway. this too shall pass and no emotion is forever and I will see my partner again and we’ll have a long life together :-)#anne speaks
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I just realized, the Link in Tears of the Kingdom is almost certainly the oldest Link we’ve ever gotten to play as. He’s the only one who’s unambiguously an adult.
#tears of the kingdom#legend of zelda#Zelda#zelda tears of the kingdom#legend of zelda tears of the kingdom#he’s around 17 years old in breath of the Wild#based on the dialogue options relating to the Noble pursuit#and enough time passed between that game and TOTK#for Hudson and Rhondson to have a kid#and for that kid to be old enough to speak and read full sentences#and to go to Gerudo Town#so at least five years if not more#meaning at minimum Link and Zelda are 22 years old in TOTK#maybe even 23 if we assume a six year gap#like between the game releases#of course this isn’t factoring in the shrine of resurrection time#or Zelda being locked in semi-stasis while sealing Calamity Ganon#but I’m willing to just say they’re in their 20s for now
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