#is... gayest even a word
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teddybeartoji · 8 months ago
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ok tell me if this is too gay but the best way to explain it is if I had a tail it would be wagging like crazy whenever I see u bc ur so cool to me
IS THATGAYYY IM EMBARRSED IM JUST SO HAPPY I HAVE U AS MY FRIEND AND THAT I FOUND SOMONE I CAN TALK TO ABOUT ALL MY EMBARRASSING JJK THOUGHTS WITH !!!
IDUJNOO IM EMBARASD NOW I JUST THINK UR NEAT !!!! ur like a strawberry frosted donut, I want to put u in my mouth and savor the flavor
It’s also late and I’m sleepy and just word vomittjng in ur inbox EHEGDJD
😭😭😭😭😭😭YOU ARE THE CUTEST THING IN THE WORLDDDD NOTHING IS EVER TOO GAY SILLY I LOVE YOU SOOSO MUCH AND I THINK YOU'RE PRETTY NEAT TOO:33333 I THINK OF YOU LIKE A WARM PASTRY TOO BTW LIKE I JUST KNOW THAT WHEN I SINK MY TEETH INTO YOU'RE YOU'RE GONNA TASTE THE THE SWEETEST AND THE WARMEST FUCKING THING IN THE WORLD AND I'M JUST GONNA MELT INTO A LOVESICK PUDDLE!!!!!!!! AND WDYMMM I THINK YOU'RE SO COOL😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭AS IF I DIDN'T ALMOST CRY THE FIRST TIME YOU EVER INTERACTED WITH ME LMAO PLSSSSS
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lemonisntreal · 2 months ago
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TONE DEAF :: Rosita and Norman <3
The first in a [hopefully] series of redesign + headcanon posts where I give you my take on a character for my AU
I'm grouping the two together because a] a lot of fluff headcanons I have, they share [because they're literally husband and wife]. And b] if I made an individual post for every single character, I... would go insane. So yeah. A bunch of characters are gonna get clumped together.
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[FULL MASTERPOST HERE [yet to be made <3]]
HEADCANONS // BACKSTORY ⬇️
Me and the bad bitch I pulled by being autistic [also autistic]
Both of them are the same age, mid to late thirties.
In terms of general intelligence: Rosita has gifted IQ, while Norman is at genius level.
I know. I know Norman seems kinda dim in the movies. But guys [LMAO]. "I know it looks like there's nothing happening behind those eyes, but...... he can make entire computers!"
He's so smart yet so stupid. He's that kind of character. Like he can do all of this super impressive shit, and is super talented and can do math like BOOM done, but he's also kinda a "deer-in-the-headlights" when it comes to life [I LOVE HIM 👹]
Both of them worked hard and have their college degrees almost completely paid off at this point because of the scholarships they earned.
Rosita has a degree in engineering, Norman's a computer scientist.
They're both in STEM, it's just that Rosita likes to handle more of the mechanical aspects of things while Norman's better with the technical stuff, which I think is cute af.
Yin and Yang <3
This dynamic is just how they are too. How they act. Like for example, Rosita can be very to-the-point-
She's very much a problem solver and will get right to it once she understands what she's doing. Like yeah, she often takes a very methodical approach to it [see the scene where she's got all the papers laid out to try and learn to dance- very new territory for her], but once she learns, she gos all in. And EATS.
Norman's gotta have a plan before doing anything, meanwhile. He has a morning routine that can't be interrupted or else his whole day and mood will be thrown off. He reads through a recipe twice before even starting. That kind of stuff.
He's a lot more hesitant to even try.
A lot of people find Norman boring. But Rosita is enraptured by every word he says, she LOVES his long spiels about hyper-specific [and often mundane] things.
AAAA--
Norman is also a closeted DORK. He ran a tabletop games club in highschool with a couple other of his geeky ass friends [he's still into D&D to this day and has introduced Rosita to the game too]
[she's fun to play with, but super competitive. This goes for ANY game, actually, not just D&D. She'll kinda accidentally turn everything into a "contest" due to her inability to not do her very best] [it's mostly inspirational, not annoying, if that makes sense?]
I also wanna say Norman was in a weird amount of drama that he didn't want to be in at this time. Like all of his friends had falling-outs, and he was just always caught in the middle of it.
He's afraid of confrontation [UNLESS IT'S FOR HIS WIFE] [HE STANDS UP FOR HER RAHHHH] [this is gonna happen when I get to rewriting Sing 2, he's NOT just gonna take Crystal calling his WIFE "mommy pig"]
They're sooo "excuse me, he asked for no pickles"
Norman and Rosita technically met in high school, in Junior year when Norman first moved to Calatonia.
WHICH, he and his family did this because this was a point in time where laws having to do with the rights of animals were VERY flimsy, and Calatonia was one of the first and only safe places at the time-- for Pigs especially, actually.
The 3 Little Pigs is deadass CANON TO SING. So Pigs were/are actually a marginalized species in this universe.
[[during the warring period that I have yet to really talk about, they were often victims of the anarchy and poaching, so stigmas and insults around them still exist to this day]]
[[[[see Jimmy Crystal]]]]
So anyway, they "met" in high school- Norman totally crushed on Rosita from afar whenever he'd catch her in volleyball matches-
Rosita had a major tomboy phase throughout high school, slowly falling out of it during college [still only saves dresses and skirts for special occasions really]
[[Fun fact, Rosita is also sapiosexual [attracted to intelligence] [Roxanne Ritchi ahh] ]]
[[Norman is bi]]
They actually got introduced to eachother and had a proper arc when they went to the same college [which might've been a college in Redshore actually? But I'm not 100% sure on that headcanon. It would line up since Rosita's "wanted to perform in Redshore since she was a little kid" and Redshore is obviously a massive city with a lot of notoriety. Idk though- and it's not really that important to the story anyways]
Norman and Rosita had plans together- they were gonna make it big and live freely. Things were looking up with the lawmakers, who were finally repealing a bunch of nasty stuff that was put in place during the war times. And the two had hope that their dreams could actually be accomplished.
Rosita, who was originally gonna play it safe and become an engineer, was now thinking about attempting to become a performer [which Norman has supported since the beginning, he LOVES her singing, and often tells her that she's "better than some of the people I've heard on TV!"]
But. Life got in the way...
Present day, Norman works in Redshore at Crystal Enterprises. He's the head of some sort of organizational team- not really working on what he loves at this point.
And this is because of their children, who were a very sudden appearance in their lives [which is why we see so much struggle in the chaos at the beginning of the movie in this AU]
Rosita stopped everything, and Norman grabbed the first high-ish paying job he could, spending all his spare time on clocking in overtime hours.
The kids are all adopted, and there's only 6 now: Oldest Caspar [13], twin boys Mickey and Moe [11], middle child Kelly [9], little bro Freddy[8], and Zoey the sweet baby sister [6].
They became foster parents after the death of Rosita's sister [this hc is kinda subject to change, but this is the story rn. I'll specify on this later ☝️]
So Rosita's kinda put her life on hold for these babies. She's such a great mom to them, and they love her and Norman so much
But some of the older kids [Caspar specifically] are kinda in a rough phase since they feel like she resents them [which she doesn't], or that she isn't their "real mom" [which she IS]
This is like an E plot in the story, but definitely's gonna get at least a little bit of focus.
Rosita and Norman's marriage is falling apart just a little bit due to burnout, but it'll get better <3 [I can't do anything tragic to these two they're too sweet]
Norman snuggles up to Rosita in his sleep. Rosita starfishes LMAO
They wake up entangled. This is normal.
"Pig piles" are also a thing- there have been several nights where all six children "had nightmares" and so the family of 8 all slept in the same bed.
Norman has the best bond with the two girls out of all the children. They immediately latched onto him to be their level-headed dad.
Rosita can carry two kids at once easily, and often "relocates" them like this :>
She's probably the strongest out of everyone in the troupe if you don't count the potential Meena has. She solos.
She's constantly taking notes on everyone and everything around her. At the theater, you'll catch her tidying stuff up she spots out of the corner of her vision while you're having a conversation with her [she's still listening]. She knows everyones favorite foods, and allergies, and their preferences in things, etc. She's the most attentive and considerate out of all of them [the mom]
She may have a touch of OCD.
She gives the best hugs.
Rosita is also a FANTASTIC cook [not even a headcanon, I'm pretty sure the entire fandom agrees on this one] and often bakes stuff for her sweet-toothed children [and husband]
This is actually how she initially connected with Caspar, who refused to eat or speak at first when they were all placed with Rosita.
Cinnamon rolls.
Kelly will only eat the frosting off the top, and has ruined an entire pan before by doing this.
Rosita actually isn't the biggest fan of chocolate, small detail.
Idk why she just strikes me as not being an enjoyer.
Loves vanilla though. People are furious when she answers "vanilla" with zero hesitation to the chocolate vs vanilla question.
Norman is kinda a hopeless romantic, or at least really enjoys the aesthetic of it [in a sweet and not shallow way ofc], and goes all out every Valentine's Day: balloons, flowers, the works. He's learned that Rosita prefers strawberries over a box of chocolates, however. Has a tradition of getting a fruit basket for her <3
They also have a tradition from all the way back in college, where they go out to eat at specifically the in-universe equivalent of Olive Garden [which was the fanciest thing they could afford at the time] and eat a shared giant plate of spaghetti.
Norman loves coffee. Insists he likes it black but actually prefers a good 50:50 ratio of creamer and coffee.
Norman is also ☝️ lactose intolerant LMAO
[[or would be, if traditional milk was widely accessible/a thing. I say "lactose intolerant" but what I really mean is he's allergic to most milk substitutes- like nuts and soy [gives him tummy ache, not anaphylaxis] ]]
God, parenthesis are carrying me so hard rn.
Stopping here because I'm tired, but I could go ON about these two omg-
Normita forever rahhhh <3
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queer-cackling · 7 months ago
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love seeing people react to Vi becoming a cop like "Oh my god this is so out of character!! What's going on!" When it was not, and that was the point, I fear.
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theunconcernedembalmer · 28 days ago
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I just so happened to have this shitty comic drawn because I'm currently insane over these two specifically
featuring my other bastard @the-bloodline-embrace
#identity v#aesop carl#identity v embalmer#identity v ask blog#victor grantz#identity v postman#unconcerned comic#did i do this comic to procrastinate my other comic? yes#i was looking for references for exorcist's outfit cos thats what bitch edgelord wears n was going through my exorcist comics#i missed those. i peaked with those. pls go n read them if u havent especially the 2nd one its on my pinned. shameless self promo /shot#anyway i was like Hey i kinda miss doing action scenes even though theyre hard n i have no idea what im doing#n then i wondered what if the bastard on this blog met the bastard on my other blog. n this happened. within a day#i was possessed by the two bastards to draw this at gunpoint /j#to be fair i was also like Since this is a comic done Purely for Fun it can be as shitty as it will be#so my brush is thicc n my words are handwritten n i removed a whole lot of details. pls excuse the quality#ive been thinking so much about exorcist n embrace. especially embrace. i would draw him more but. god that headpiece#anyway embrace is also a freak but hes my freak that i can throw at exorcist. lore wise aka according to the bullshit abilities#i gave to both embrace n bitch. bitch would win. because hes death personified. embrace is just some guy with spears speed n cosplay powers#i will not elaborate#anyway we are not gonna talk about how gay this became. i didnt do this they just started flirting in the middle of fighting its not my fau#“stop losing sight of me” is probably the gayest line ive written so far n ofc its fucking bitch edgelord that says it. stabs him with a pi#i am going insane over these two i think it shows#anyway im going to disappear for a bit unless theres something in the inbox. or i finish the other comic i was supposed to be working on
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alleycatchitchat · 1 year ago
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wow sonadow fans feeling very validated right now
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dawndestroyer · 1 year ago
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I know I have very complex emotions on romance in general but man I really hate most terms for romantic partners. they really drive me up the wall if mostly for personal reasons
boyfriend/girlfriend are so unserious which I suppose is fine if you want to keep it casual but I am nearly 30 years old and definitely too old for what originated as "wow I have a FRIEND and shes a GIRL and I'm a BOY you know what THAT MEANS" except now has two million social connotations attached to it
meanwhile wife/husband/spouse is. another thing entirely. I see why people like using it. there is a certain officiality/legality that will always be tied to the words, which I get in a way that people want to reclaim such things in a way. its because of that sort of weight and expected committal that I am always leery eyed of it though, or it might be more because I know of too many people with exes who used such words for each other everywhere whose relationships I have always watched deteriorate in real time
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awsteb · 2 years ago
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apropos have i ever mentioned 1. had a one direction themed birthday party for my 10th 2. saw one direction with my "best friend" (crush) who also loved them ON VALENTINES DAY WHEN I WAS 11
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mashmouths · 1 year ago
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the lead singer of melt is the hottest woman i've ever seen in my life. jesus christ i love gay people 🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶
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anabetel35 · 1 year ago
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I’m still pretty proud of my wesper fic, even though it’s relatively short compared to everything else I’ve written, and even though it is MCD. The words were wording when I was writing that one, and i like it a lot :)
(… I’d also try to promote my silly little Kuwei [+Wywei] fic that has consumed nearly all of my thoughts for the last four months, but a- it’s about Kuwei and b- I’ve only published one chapter and it’s 10 000 words. The rest of the fic has 45000 words. My hand slipped a bit. It’s not finished yet. I’ve written it for two people and two people only, one of which is me and the other being that one lovely soul who left kudos on it so far :,) But I’ve been having sooo much fun writing it. Honestly you could probably read it without ever being in the SoC fandom, it’s about a character that had like five lines in the whole duology and they were mentioned in one sentence in a different book.)
omg it’s FAN FICTION FRIDAY
Reblog and promote a fic of yours <3
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therewillbenoromance · 4 months ago
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just gonna come up here and say that when i was a kid the song girlfriend by avril lavigne was a lesbian song
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evilweasel · 9 months ago
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does anyone wanna know about my self insert fanfiction I wrote when I was 11 about A Little Princess. By Francis Hodgson Burnett. Written in 1905. Where I was a time travelling vampire princess.
#and GUESS WHAT#me and sara crewe??? besties#sara was SO intrigued by this new person who came to the seminary. who are they. where did they come from#i described myself as having a “quiet and intelligent” voice. i cannot#btw all i said was “hello”. but quietly. and intelligently#ooouhhh im so mysterious i take lessons by private tutor and am never seen....... sara's so confused and intrigued.....#and then i overhear her telling a story one day and im like “wow you kind of suck. wheres the action and tension?”#and sara is so offended shes like “i want to tell stories about beautiful things” and im like “yeah ofc YOU would”#and then she kinda has a grudge against me except shes too polite to hold grudges so shes just vaguely annoyed whenever im in a room#i mention her cool brown eyes meeting my misty grey ones like. every other paragraph#and then she walks in on me feeding from a DEAD BODY from the MORGUE which are the SECRET PACKAGES ive been taking in my room the WHOLE TIME#im feasting on an ARM and then i have to lock her in my room and swear her not to tell the other children#and she thinks im evil at first and then realises im good and that i had a point actually about her stories and is flattered i think shes as#beautiful as the stories she tells#in hindsight this is the gayest thing ive ever written. mad crushing on sara crewe#and also myself and my intelligent misty grey eyes and offputting demeanour and beautiful silvery hair. all things mentioned multiple times#im actually so disappointed i didnt write more#also. the entire fic my name was Sapphire#very period very 1800s slay. self insert is doing a great job at fitting in#i sucked so bad at naming characters. thats not even the worst one. the worst one i cannot disclose#weasel words
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ellieslittleslutt · 2 months ago
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Random Loser!Ellie Head Cannons ✮ ⋆ ˚。𖦹
MEN DNI!!!
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⋆。°✩ she would send you random videos when she’s at the store or trying new foods, or just when she’s high and needs to ramble about her comics.
⋆。°✩ speaking of comics, the first time you came over she was so embarrassed of the giant collection she had on display on her shelves. like this girl had to buy another shelf from ikea just so she can display it all.
⋆。°✩ she’s the type no matter where she’s always touching you. at the grocery store? holding your hand. folding laundry? head in your lap. literally no matter what always in contact.
⋆。°✩ at night she wears the most ridiculous shirts to bed. she has a shirt with just micheal ceras face on it claiming “babe he’s apart of the family”
⋆。°✩ her wardrobe is the gayest shit ever. mass mass MASS amount of flannels and graphic tees. also has a weird amount of tank tops and struggles too much picking which to wear. all her pants are either beat up jeans or beat up cargos. takes lots of her clothes from joel.
⋆。°✩ on her period she’s the biggest baby. gets so clingy too that she’s always cuddling you and even when you’re showering she sits next to the tub while she groans about her cramps.
⋆。°✩ she claims to her friends that she only listens to grungy ish music never telling them that you guys scream your lungs out to chappell roan.
⋆。°✩ at night when you’re getting ready for bed she’s up on her nintendo playing pikmin.
“ellie go to sleep”
“but i’m doing a boss fightttt”
⋆。°✩ she loves watching you get ready for date nights. she pulls up a chair next to the sink while you do your make up and hair just star struck by her girlfriend.
⋆。°✩ waking up with her she’s always sprawled out arm around your waist snoring as you try to wiggle out to pee and she groans clinging tighter.
⋆。°✩ definitely send you pictures like this saying “babe this might be us.”
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⋆。°✩ the worst brain rot you’ve ever seen.
⋆。°✩ she loves taking your chapstick so much that you got her a princess collection for her birthday and unironically uses them daily and loves kissing you while she wears it.
⋆。°✩ spoils you so much even if it hurts her wallet. when she comes home from a hang out with jesse and dina she always has either a new plushie or trinket for you.
⋆。°✩ bought you guys matching plushies getting married and keeps them on your sofa next to eachother.
⋆。°✩ can’t sleep without her stuffed animals next to her.
⋆。°✩ on the rare occasions she falls asleep before you she’s sleepily rambling to you while your play with her hair watching her eye lids close slowly and her words slur.
⋆。°✩ loves it when you paint her nails or doodle on her shoes. she also keeps a photo of you and her with lipstick marks all over her face in her phone case and shows it off all the time.
⋆。°✩ huge loser but you always tell her “you’re my loser”
a/n: i love her sm omg and i finally got around to doing this!? idk i might write again soon or not depends on if i have the energy
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lehnsherrrr · 2 months ago
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Here’s a collection of all the gayest cherik gifs I could find, with a description for why each one of them is gay because micro movements and body language are my favourite. (I’m autistic and focus on details instead of the big picture.)
First things first.
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The way he’s just STARING, and he does this a lot, like pretty much always. But as Charles turns, Erik stays in the same place, meaning he is now weirdly close to him. The only place he could look is Charles neck and jawline, which is CRAZY, but what’s crazier is how he does it so confidently.
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Charles goes to put his arm up, but decides not too. Even after this I’m pretty sure he has his arm around Erik anyway, but it’s actually gayer that Charles had a moment to think ‘Wait I shouldn’t put my arm there. He could’ve just done it, but instead he had to think about it.
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The calm before the violence. The way Charles sees them both there, then actually realises it’s Erik, and his eyes light up. Also love the way you can see Erik’s reflection, it’s beautiful.
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But of course that tender love that came so instinctively immediately washes away as the past 10 years come flooding back. But for just a moment, the shock of seeing Erik again made him forget about the pain.
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Also see, Erik’s moment of recognition. This isn’t the pretty shiny professor big eyes, soft face, and love radiating from him. This is a tired grizzled man, a whole 10 years older, no longer prim and proper, no longer the star student. And also in this moment, Charles doesn’t have his powers, so Erik also can’t feel those constant rays of love being sent from him, which he so heavily associated with him. He might even only recognise him because they’re face to face, but he still manages it, cause how could he ever forget Charles.
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More on that previous idea, here Erik immediately recognises Charles from just the presence of him alone. It’s been another 10 years, Charles hasn’t even spoken, and Erik already knows he’s there.
Think of it, him going through all this darkness and pain, standing there wallowing in a shadow. And then suddenly, there’s a light. That beam of love that he hadn’t felt for over 20 years now, but it’s stuck with Erik, because he holds onto it so dearly.
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These two gifs together. If these are the brotherly friend enemies bros that the movies were supposed to portray them as, then there was absolutely no reason for either of them to be so stricken with emotion about the other that they are brought to tears.
You can feel it if you look at them here, you can feel your heart ache as theirs do. There are words unspoken, tears spilling out as they think about the other, thinking about coming back together.
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Okay easing up from the heartbreak. Aftercare for the emotional rawdogging I just put you through.
Look at this hoe. GIRL LOOK AWAY??? FOR ONE SECOND??? I don’t think Charles even feels that strongly for Erik in this moment, but Erik sure does. Look at him, the pure admiration in his eyes. Terrible.
In this part of the film, Erik is still in awe at Charles. Everything Charles does is so full of love, Erik can’t even comprehend it. Especially that this love was being directed towards him, towards people Charles didn’t even know. He’s dumbstruck.
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And then this. What. Girl. WHAT.
As a queer person, it’s rare that I have such an intensely gay moment. Look at it. There’s not even tension here, they’re so relaxed.
But now think about this. How did they get there?? Which of them suggested it?????
One of them would’ve had to ask to hang out with the other. Alone.
Then I bet it was Erik who said “excellent idea I’ll bring the chess set.”
And then they wondered around looking for a place to sit and thought “hm yes those big white steps beside a beautiful view of water looks perfect, we’d be very alone there!”
And then they both would’ve walked up those steps, and sat down to play chess.
and THEN.
Charles would’ve eventually leaned back. But he didn’t just lean back, he leaned towards Erik. Look at the way he’s laying, he’s so relaxed.
You ever been by yourself and realise you’re sat in the weirdest position? Hanging out with a close friend or partner, this will also happen.
Charles isn’t aware of how he’s sat, he just did it cause he’s relaxed and comfortable.
And they ain’t even playing chess.
It’s either Charles or Erik’s turn, and I’m not even sure if they know whose turn it is. Erik is yapping about politics, and Charles is listening but also staring at him instead of the view.
Also note the way that Erik doesn’t look at Charles here. He is looking at his thoughts as he speaks (a very neurodivergent thing to do). And if he is always looking at the thing he’s thinking about, then that explains what he’s thinking about when he’s looking at Charles.
I mean really Michael Fassbender, what was your thought process when acting out these scenes.
I went to acting school for a very large part of my life (absolutely traumatic) and the most important thing in acting is to not just do what the character is doing. You have to think it, believe it.
So tell me Michael Fassbender, what was Erik thinking as you stared longingly at James’ jaw, eyes, neck. When you looked him up and down, when you touched him so gently.
You made those decisions, you knew what you were doing. Actors always have the final say.
ONE LAST THING.
This happens so many times I couldn’t find just one gif, and I also met the gif maximum.
There are so many moments in all of the films where Erik and Charles just stare at each other. I thoroughly believe they are talking telepathically in those moments. When they stare at each other at the strip club? They’re saying something about Angel. It’s obvious.
I actually really like the way the film doesn’t tell us what they’re saying, cause they’re so obviously speaking and we don’t even need to hear it. Charles is a telepath, you don’t just stare into a telepaths big blue eyes and have no thoughts in your head. And a telepath doesn’t just stare at you and not project anything. That’s so unrealistic.
Also see this post to see how gently Erik touches Charles (and one time he doesn’t) ((wish that was me AWOOGA))
Need to rest my hands now this one knackered me. If you have any other gifs of those little moments, PLEASE SEND THEM TO MEEEEEE
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celestialholz · 4 months ago
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Live long and fuck in Hondas (or 'why that Vulcan salute is way more significant than you think it is')
Hey. Hey Holz. Did you know Deadpool and Wolverine fucked in the Odyessy? Did you know that they now live in a one-bed with Blind Al? Did you know that -
Yes, friend. I know all of it. And you're all super fucking valid for pointing it out.
... But maybe all of you aren't seasoned Trekkies like me. Maybe not all of you gorgeous people understand the true significance of this.
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Or maybe you just want a definitive way to win the argument of "are these two fucking?"
But either way, I'm here to help, and to tell you why, amongst all the absurdly homoerotic text of this film, this moment? Might be the gayest of them all.
Now, we must start by saying that although you wouldn't know it from the bullshit Abrams films, these two:
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Are the fathers of gay fanfiction. Spock and Kirk here are the reason you're living in the fantastic timeline where you can write/read men fucking without any other shred of plot and that this is a legitimate and normalised internet experience - everyone say thank you, iconic papas. These guys were so homoerotically coded that even in the 60s, the era of wondrously overdramatic performances of all kinds and fairly prevalent homophobia, The Girlies still took notice, still started mailing each other fics and making zines and being just hugely excited at the thought of these two getting space-married. They are fandom as we know it today's beginning, and seventy years later they're still an enduringly popular ship on AO3. (You should all go and watch Amok Time, by the way. Contains the Honda Odyessy scene of the 60s, except there's weird biology and wrestling and just go and put it on your screens, thank me later. They fucked on that planet.)
Anyway, these two were as close as early colour TV could ever allow two men to be, deepening their *coughs* friendship almost every single episode or film - Trek's creator Gene Roddenberry even gave them a unique word in Spock's Vulcan language, with the meaning of 'friend, brother, lover.' (And if that isn't ringing any Poolverine bells, I'm not actually sure what you want out of this post. Enjoy it anyway, love you.)
... And then we get to 1982's The Wrath of Khan, and to that moment that every iconic screen couple must face - the ol' classic, it's you or me and I won't let it be you.
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Sure, the set-up's a little different here - the chamber Spock's in is filled with radiation, and the scene's quieter, softer. And Kirk isn't a mutant so he can't smash his way in, he can just sit there and inwardly die as his emotional support Vulcan does.
... But you get where I'm coming from here. Ryan Reynolds doesn't take a million other potential love scenes from across the cinematic ages - no, he takes this. What is for many the romantic acknowledgement of a whole generation. The humble and desperately sweet beginning of it everything we fans know and love nowadays. The most ambiguously romantic homosexual relationship in television, directly comparative to what is now arguably the most ambiguously romantic homosexual relationship in cinema. And lest we forget, Wade doesn't believe in a fourth wall - this is a conscious choice, both in canon and in the writer's room.
Oh it's so clever and so beautiful a girl could weep. Ryan just introduced the MCU to the gays, just as Kirk and Spock did all those years ago to the masses of the time.
And then there's what it means.
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This is the Vulcan salute, created to mean either 'live long and prosper' or 'peace and long life' - it's used more or less interchangeably.
But part of that's irrelevant when you're as immortal as these two.
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So we're left with the sentiments of prosperity and peace, given to a man who up to this point can't imagine ever prospering again, is the furthest thing away from being at peace. Wade gives Logan the opportunity to go on, to find the things he's been lacking for so long now - things he has already helped him find. Spock tells Kirk during The Wrath that 'the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few,' and that's exactly what Wade's doing here - sacrificing himself for the greater good of his friends and his newly beloved, however much it will hurt them all.
And that's lovely, and poignant, and character-growing, and I think we all would have been content to leave it at that and have our noble sacrifice, however much we would have wept. Kirk goes on to find the remnants of Spock's soul in the next film in the series, to bring him essentially back from the dead because he felt it was more than his own soul's worth not to have done... which, again, ringing a bell anyone?
Because Logan, in not so many words, tells dear Wade to fuck right off, and we get this.
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What we've got here is a direct translation of one of cinema's gayest moments, made somehow infinitely more gay. A true achievement here - I genuinely think I spontaneously acquired tetanus in the cinema for a good minute, my jaw dropped so hard on seeing this. The pillars are the same colour as Kirk and Spock's original uniforms, for fuck's sake. I'm dying out here.
What we've done here is create narrative equality. The whole film's kinda done that leading up to this anyway - they're both mentally fucked up men who can't die, who are constantly dying anyway, who are evenly-matched in battle and both enjoy Honda fucking, who have forged a real love even as they piss each other off at every turn.
But here, they place one another in narrative equality for the first time. It's not about a sacrifice, not now, even though they're assuming it is one - it's about what should be done. It's about righting wrongs, being heroes, being together because every option other than that is unacceptable, because neither understands quite how to lose anyone else. They've both made the same choice, and that's not to let the other die alone.
It's about holding hands and loving and never letting go, even if it kills them.
... It's just about the most romantic and gorgeous thing I've ever fucking seen.
There are no more instances of masks, once they're done in this station. They don't need them any longer; they will never need them again.
And that's only emphasised by the parting shot we get of this... almost directly after Vanessa and Wade share a final sweet look.
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I don't know, man. It's almost like the true conclusion is hidden behind the acceptable masquerade. Imagine that in the MCU, folks.
They've taken one of the most intimate and sweet moments in screen history, and made even more glorious.
They did The Wrath of Khan better than The Wrath of Khan did it.
And that's... that's gay. That's just about the gayest thing they could ever have done, and I adore it to the smallest pieces.
So remember, the next time your friends disbelieve you... show 'em this. Show them that they redid the very beginnings of slash fandom, and did it better.
(And then you can add on that they now live in a one-bed with their grandma, daughter and dog, and will do for the rest of their lives. Kirk and Spock didn't even get THAT shit.)
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rassicas · 7 months ago
Note
Hello Rassicas.
I am working on a video about Nintendo’s lgbtq characters. Of course when it comes to splatoon, there’s a certain duo that comes to mind, off the hook.
The problem I’ve been having is that it seems a lot of the information, wether that be the English/japanese bits of dialogue, interviews and other bits of lore, seems to be completely scattered around.
Considering you describe yourself as the “CEO of splatoon lore” I was wondering if you could help me compile any bits and pieces of those two gay cephalopods.
(My apologies if this is moreso something I should be asking in dms instead)
i think the ask box is a good place for this, i'm not as hardcore of a shipper as other people are (more of a worldbuilding enjoyer), but i know there is so much and I don't wanna dig for all of it. I'll share a few off the top of my head. pearlina fans reading this, please feel free to share anything else in the replies/reblogs. 1. Pearl interview from Octotune: its on my mind since i just brought it up in a previous ask I think the artwork in this interview has the strongest implication that pearl and marina live together. Also the question: Q17: What is the best gift you have ever received? Pearl: The chance to meet Marina. 2. Marina's manga, "Dear Pearl". a manga that, in-universe, is drawn by marina.
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genuinely i think this is one of the gayest things there is in canon like theres hearts in that LOVE letter thats directed towards pearl COME ON (i consider it canon as its drawn by seita inoue, who handles splatoon's art direction and a lot of lore/worldbuilding). you can read it here
3. Marina's tagline on Splatoon Base calls her a 恋する乙女 "young lady in love". the word for 'to love' (恋する) is specifically romantic.
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4. Off the Hook didn't fight against each other in the s2 final splatfest like the Squid Sisters did because they're on such good terms with each other.
I’ve heard people saying that since the final fest for the last game was a showdown between the Squid Sisters, this time it was bound to be between Off the Hook.
Nogami: I think that’s probably the obvious conclusion, but the development team don’t actually want those two to attack one another. Since the Squid Sisters have their own talents and abilities, even though they are a duo they are also kind of rivals, so we thought we would pit them against each other. Off the Hook, though, are much more of a unit and on good terms with one another, so we didn’t want to force them to fight.
5. Marina has a photo of pearl as her desktop wallpaper. the framing of the photo very much looks romantic and intimate. there is no heterosexual explanation for this
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i'll stop here, there's definitely more and I don't wanna be here for hours. I haven't even touched on any in game dialogue. again guys feel free to make additions to this with sources. is there a pearlina masterdoc or something LOL i feel like thats something that deserves to exist (someone please make it because i wont)
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musingsofahufflepuff · 1 month ago
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Just to Stop the Feeling
bi!Theodore Nott x m!reader; angst & fluff
summary: in the wake of his mother’s death and his father’s ever increasing expectations of him, Theodore finds love in a place he never would have expected
a/n: a year in the making and this might be the gayest thing i’ve ever written. big shout out to @suugarbabe for listening to me yap about this for weeks, the anon who requested this, and everyone who’s been supporting me the past year. here's 6.2k words of bi awakening, enjoy ♡
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The Great Hall was loud, too loud if you asked Theodore. The Sytherin was sat at his house table, head propped up on one hand as his friends chattered around him. The sorting ceremony had just wrapped up which meant everyone in the Hall was catching up about their summers. Theo thought back to just a couple days ago, the oppressive silence that haunted the Nott Manor in stark contrast to just how lively and crowded it was now. His father was rarely in common spaces nowadays, thank Merlin, but that left Theo to stalk around the Manor much like the ghosts floating above him now. If only it was as interesting an existence as Sir Nicholas or even Peeves. Not even a poorly rolled cigarette in the garden brought much enjoyment to him these days.
“Theo! Are you with us mate?”
His eyes drag up to meet the inquisitive look on Enzo’s face. He hums in acknowledgement.
“We’ve been talking to you for the past five minutes.” Theo takes the cue to look around and see the group looking at him, some in amusement and some—Mattheo specifically, though he tries to hide it—with concern.
He slips on his signature lazy half smirk with minimal effort, rehearsed and perfected. “Tired from the train, what did I miss?”
Enzo perks up and launches them back into conversation, Mattheo visibly relaxing in his peripheral. Arm still supporting his head, he jokes and laughs and nods along to everyone recapping their summer breaks, feeling hollow.
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The Slytherin common room wasn’t cozy in the traditional sense, with its cool lighting and excess of stone architecture, but Theo found it comforting nonetheless. He was sitting on one of the leather couches in front of the fireplace, this time only in the company of Mattheo and Draco.
Cool leather against his skin contrasted nicely with the heat of the fire, the familiar voices of his friends putting his soul at ease for the first time in months. He loosely kept up with what they were talking about, his mind simultaneously wandering to thoughts about the new term. Evidently, Draco and Mattheo were on the same wavelength as the topic shifted to Hogwarts and—much to Theo’s dismay—girls. “So Nott, got your eye on anyone this year?”
Theo rolled his head against the back of the couch to face Draco, that smirk back on his face. “Eh, hadn’t thought about it too much. I know Pansy has hers on you, Malfoy.”
The blond scoffs, “as if I wasn’t aware.”
“Like a predator on prey,” Mattheo cracks, smile evident in his voice. Theo allows himself to chuckle as Draco looks at them helplessly. Theo feels Matt’s elbow nudge at his side. “Too bad it isn’t Granger looking at him that way.”
A pillow flies past Theo’s head and smacks the boy next to him square in the face. Mattheo dramatically falls back onto the couch before erupting into laughter.
“Too bad you aren’t a beater, huh Malfoy?” Theo quips, quickly putting up his hands to potentially block another projectile pillow.
Draco just groans, “I’m going to bed.”
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The first month of classes flies by fairly quickly, everyone falling into their usual rhythm. Quidditch practices a few times a week, late nights smoking in the astronomy tower and the odd party here and there. Theo is itching to get off the castle grounds.
That’s why he jumped at the opportunity to go when Enzo asked the group for company on his shopping trip that Saturday morning. Theodore loved Hogsmeade in the fall. The shops would put up festive decorations and the entire atmosphere of the small village grew extra cozy.
With a Slytherin scarf loosely draped over his shoulders and Butterbeer on the brain, he met his group of friends at the beginning of the path to Hogsmeade.
The breeze was comfortable as they walked through the village, stopping every couple of shops to peruse the new inventory. They finally make their way to the Three Broomsticks, finding a table for the group.
Theo groans as he gets voted to go up to the bar for drinks. Sitting at one of the stools is a guy in scarf showing off a badger emblem. As he gets closer, he realizes he vaguely recognizes the Hufflepuff. Theo settles himself down on the stool next to him, causing the guy to look over.
He has a quizzical expression on his face, eyes lighting up as he figures out who he’s looking at, “You’re Nott, right? I think we have a couple classes together.”
His heart thumps a little harder at his name on the boy’s lips. The boy in front of him tilts his head when Theo doesn’t respond, reminding him to give a quick nod.
The Hufflepuff’s lips tug up into a small smile as he offers up his name.
Theo blinks a couple times and stammers out something about seeing the guy around sometime before he’s speed walking back to the table, no drinks in hand.
“Whoa, who got Nott blushing?”
Theo furrows his brows together in confusion, a hand coming up to his face. And sure enough, heat was radiating off his cheeks.
“Never mind that, Theo! Where’s the butterbeer?”
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Monday morning Theo is sitting in History of Magic before class starts, getting ready for an hour of boredom, when books hitting the desk with a thud catches his attention. He’s startled to see you, the Hufflepuff boy from the Three Broomsticks, standing there already looking at him.
“Mind if I sit here?”
Theo nods, feeling like an idiot. Why was this Hufflepuff boy able to completely shut off his ability to speak, let alone think?
That bright smile is back on your face as you take the seat next to him. And his heart flutters.
“So glad this is the last year of having to put up with Binns and his masterclass story telling,” he can practically feel the sarcasm dripping from your voice and finds himself cracking a smile. An actual smile, not the smirk he usually puts on.
“I know, it’s a wonder anyone manages to stay awake.”
You gesture to the travel mug in your hands, “gotta keep at least a bit of caffeine on me for emergencies. One of my muggle-born friends gave me something called an energy drink? It’s…a lot, to be quite honest.”
Theo huffs a laugh, “energy drink? You’d be better off with some espresso than whatever muggles put in those things.”
You give a contemplative nod, “I’ll keep that in mind.”
Before he can figure out something else to say, to keep existing in the surprising warmth of conversation with you, Binns is starting up his monotone ramble. Theo feels his heart sink as you look away from him to at least make an attempt to pay attention. He silently looks through his textbook, trying to ignore the weird sensation in his chest.
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“Hey Theo, wanna come to the Astronomy Tower tonight?” Mattheo’s voice comes from behind where he’s sat in the common room the next evening after dinner.
He pulls his nose out of the book he was buried in as he thinks it over. It had been a while since he’d had a proper smoke with the lads, and he didn’t need to ask to know that’s what Mattheo had in mind. It doesn’t take long for him to set his book down on the table with a nod, “yeah, sure.”
As he turns around to face him, he sees Enzo right behind the other boy, grinning with a thumbs up. The look on his face makes Theo debate changing his mind, but he walks out of the common room with the pair anyway. 
The walk up to the Astronomy Tower is long and filled with so many stairs that Theo is very quickly reminded why he doesn’t bother coming up here as often as he thinks he’d like to. Enzo and Mattheo walk slightly in front of him, talking about something Theo doesn’t really bother to listen in on, Quidditch perhaps? How those two don’t run out of things to talk about, he’ll never know. He’s so lost in thought he barely notices the last two flights of stairs to the top and he’s suddenly hit with the cool air of early fall. He’s also suddenly aware that Mattheo and Enzo are no longer talking, but instead looking at him. He blinks.
“Huh?”
“Told ya he’s just been on a different planet lately,” Enzo quips, nudging Mattheo with his elbow. Mattheo nods in agreement but doesn’t comment on it, instead repeating his question, “I said do ya got your own smokes or are you taking one off me? Cause if you are, we’re fucked. I’m out.”
Theo isn’t surprised in the slightest, “is that why you invited me? Free cigs?” Nonetheless, he pulls a pack out of his pocket and holds it out for him.
Matt grins as he swipes one, “nah, but it doesn’t hurt. You’ve always got nicer ones than me.” Enzo immediately scoffs.
“It’s cause you’re broke Matty—”
“Shut up, no I’m not!”
“Then explain why you keep mooching off of me—” they continue to bicker before Theo cuts them off. “Matt, got a light?” 
Mattheo shuts up and holds out a lighter, flicking it to life with practiced ease. Enzo swoops in with his joint before Theo can even pull a cigarette out of his pack, rolling his eyes at his friend. Mattheo raises an eyebrow quizzically, “weed? Seriously?”
Enzo just shrugs nonchalantly, cocky little smirk on his face. “Not my fault neither of you know how to have fun—hold on, is that my fucking lighter?!” Mattheo gives him a shrug, moving it away from where Enzo’s leaning in to get a better look. 
Theo sighs, “I think he meant on a school night—”
“Who are you? My mum? Didn’t think you cared about actually attending lessons, Teddy—” Theo immediately scowls at the nickname, making Enzo raise his hands in surrender, smirk still planted on his face. Merlin, he could be insufferable.
Theo returns the shrug, trying to play it off, “just figured with OWLs coming up—”
He’s cut off once again, this time by Mattheo, “don’t tell me, you wanna make sure you don’t miss sitting by that Hufflepuff.” Damn his ability to see straight through him. “Don’t think we didn’t notice you two sitting together yesterday in Binns’ class.”
“Well, I didn’t…” Enzo interjects but is ignored by Mattheo other than an exasperated eye roll.
“You seemed pretty chatty; wasn’t that the same guy at the Three Broomsticks last Saturday?”
Theo quickly lights the cigarette on Mattheo’s still flickering flame and shoves it between his lips. He receives an unimpressed look at his attempt to avoid the question, but to his credit, Matt refrains from pressing further. The same cannot be said for Enzo.
“So what, you’re fraternizing with Hufflepuffs now, are ya mate? Never thought I’d see the day—” his teasing is abruptly ended by Mattheo whacking him upside the head.
Mattheo lights his own cigarette before putting the lighter away, taking a deep drag from it. There’s a beat of silence between them. A gentle breeze passes through the tower as Theo looks out at the Scottish Highlands bathed in the light of the moon.
“He’s just…nice, I guess. Doesn’t seem to mind I’m a Slytherin,” Theo finally answers, releasing a stream of smoke.
Enzo chuckles, rubbing the back of his head where he was whacked. “Fair enough. I feel like usually only girls that want a little fun are willing to break that barrier.” He raises his eyebrows suggestively as he takes a drag as well. Mattheo snorts with a nod. “At least it's not a Gryffindor.” Theo’s nose subconsciously scrunches.
“Yeah, remember that Gryffindor Enz was all over end of last term because word was going around he had a good pot stash?” Now it’s Mattheo getting shoved, but he barely reacts besides a huff of a laugh. 
“Didn’t even have the goods,” Enzo pouts petulantly, “wasted a whole 2 weeks for nothing.”
“I think you’ll live, mate.”
Theo leans back against the railing, cigarette between his lips as he watches his best mates as their bickering shifts into them laughing and joking like it always does. He adds a couple quips here and there, mind wandering to the Hufflepuff boy periodically as the cigarette slowly dwindles. Once it’s reached the end of its life, he snuffs it out, pushing himself off the floor where they’d ended up sitting for the past hour. “I think I’m heading back down to the dorms, it’s getting late.”
Mattheo shares a look with Enzo. With a smirk, Enzo wolf whistles, “gotta get your beauty sleep for your little badger, eh Nott?”
Theo just flips him the middle finger as he crosses the tower to the first of many, many stairs. As his descending footsteps echo through the stairwell, Enzo turns to Mattheo, “poor fucker is whipped.”
Mattheo nods, “and down right oblivious…how many galleons are we betting for how long it takes him to figure it out?”
There’s a mischievous smirk on the other boy’s face. “How much you got?”
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The next morning, Theo is once again startled by the Hufflepuff boy dropping his books on the table with that same dramatic thud. If Theo didn’t know any better, he would start to think it was intentionally to get his attention. This time, he speaks first.
“Morning.” 
There’s that bright smile again and Theo’s chest feels…odd.
“Morning!” you chirp as you slide into the seat. “I took your advice and got some espresso, much better than that muggle concoction. Figured since it was your suggestion, I’d bring you some. Mum got some beans from a cafe in London when I wrote her about it.”
Once again a warm sensation floods Theo as a second mug is set on the table and slid his direction. He carefully picks it up and takes off the lid, finding a double shot inside. It’s still hot from what he assumes is a temperature charm on the mug and the warm sensation in his chest gets stronger.
He raises the cup to his nose, inhaling the comforting aroma of coffee before taking a sip. It’s not quite the taste of home, but it’s close. He nods appreciatively. 
Then before he can stop himself he’s making an offer, accent a hint thicker than he typically tries to control, “I’ll have to make you a cup the way I had growing up sometime. This is good though.”
Theo doesn’t have time to backtrack or change his mind before your smile is turning softer. “Yeah, I’d like that.”
To hide the flushing of his cheeks, he quickly downs the rest of the liquid and hands the mug back. For maybe the first time ever he’s glad Binns decides now is the perfect time to begin the monotonous period. 
Out of the corner of his eye he sees you put the mug back in your bag, soft smile still on your face. And maybe Theo doesn’t hate this class as much as he thought he did.
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Over the following weeks, Theodore does the unthinkable: he looks forward to bloody History of Magic, just for the opportunity to chat with you before class. 
His friends share looks at breakfast as he starts leaving earlier and earlier each Monday and Wednesday, hoping to get even just a bit of extra time with you. Because he’s too nervous to ask you to hang out. And he cannot for the life of him figure out why. 
He’s Theodore Nott. The stoic, level headed and lusted after Slytherin. Right? He makes people nervous. He flusters pretty girls. So what the bloody hell is going on? 
He’s never, not once in his 5 years at Hogwarts, ever considered the possibility that someone could do this to him. Let alone a stupid, pretty Hufflepuff boy with a gentle, excited smile that’s way too eager to mingle with a snake. But somewhere in his gut Theo knows he’d be devastated if the other boy stopped. 
And that terrifies him.
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One morning after several weeks of sitting together, you once again drop your books onto the desk with the theatrics Theo’s come to expect from you. He subconsciously finds himself perking up at the sound just before you start chattering away, something he’s also grown almost fond of. He likes that you tend to fill the space he’d otherwise find awkward or tedious in conversation, seemingly undeterred by his often quiet nature. And he’s more than happy to just listen to you and bask in your welcoming presence. 
This time you’re talking about the History of Magic exam coming up in a couple weeks and your lack of a study partner, something that instantaneously catches Theo’s attention. 
“Yeah, my usual study buddy bailed on me, the nerve,” you laugh. “So now I’m on the hunt for a new one…” 
Theo’s heart rate picks up as you trail off, there’s no way you’re going to say what he’s hoping you will. Right? There’s no way he’s that lucky. Hell, there’s no way someone like you would want to be around him outside sitting next to each other in the worst class offered at Hogwarts. He’s pretty sure you have less controversial friends to ask than a brooding Slytherin whose best mate is the son of Voldemort, for fucks sake—
His internal pity party is cut short by you looking at him almost… nervously?
“Would you maybe be free to, I dunno, study together some time next week? It’s cool if you’re not, I just thought—well, I’m not sure what I thought—other than that I would offer,” your question starts to shift into a ramble and your cheeks flush as you seem to realize it. Meanwhile, Theo’s heart has stopped and his breath catches in his throat. He has to hold himself back from shouting a thrilled “Yes!”
He clears his throat, desperately clinging to his composure. “Yeah, sure, I could make that work. When did you have in mind?”
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Theo feels nearly sick with nerves as he sits at the Central Hall fountain outside of the library waiting for you. He was at least 15 minutes early, mostly because Enzo said he would hex him if he kept pacing around the dorm room like he had been for the prior half hour. His foot taps anxiously in a way he is not used to. He's no stranger to stress, but this is on a different level. All he's going to be doing is go over the most boring aspects of wizarding history with you for a couple hours and here he is, worried he's going to end up in the Hospital Wing with heart palpitations. He takes a deep, shaky breath as he looks up at the snoring dragon mural above the library. Just breathe you idiot!
“Hey Theo, sorry I'm late. My dormmate would not shut up.” He hears your voice before he sees you, his head turning to follow the sound. And he tries to keep the surprise off his face at hearing you call him Theo instead of Nott like you had been since that afternoon in the Three Broomsticks. “You ready for the most exciting next couple hours of your life?” Oh, and what he wouldn't do to see that teasing little grin on your face more—
“Ready,” he stands from the fountain bench, following behind you through the heavy wooden doors of the library.
He walks half a step behind you as you weave your way through the tables and shelves, finding a relatively remote spot in the already quiet space. For maybe the first time in—your friendship? Theo hopes that's what you two are at least—the entire time he's known you, your set your books down without the slam.
You must have noticed the look he was giving you because you smirk. “I don't just go throwing books when you're not around. And close your jaw, you'll catch lacewing flies.”
Theo lightly bites on his lip as he sits next to you at the table, your shoulders almost touching. You flip the massive textbook open and pull a couple quills and parchment from your bag as you settle in to go over the material.
There’s a feeling of familiarity with you that Theo wasn’t anticipating. Conversation comes more naturally than when he’s spoken with you before class and he realizes he really, really likes spending time with you. There’s no bickering like there is with Matt and Enzo, no snarky comments thrown around for laughs. It’s peaceful and warm. 
He feels like that around you a lot, he realizes, warm. Comfortable. His arm brushes against yours.
Theo and you spend the next couple hours working through the exam material, interspersed with getting to know each other. He listens to you ramble about your favorite classes this term, your friends—anything you’re willing to tell him, he wants to drink it all in.
Neither of you seem to notice how close you’ve gotten to each other until he can feel your breath on his face and that warmth that seems to radiate off of you. Then, you’re getting closer.
There in the back of the library, Theo’s world comes to a standstill as you gently press your lips against his, his heart threatening to pound out of his chest. It takes him a couple seconds to regain his senses before moving his lips back against yours, losing himself in the kiss. 
He notices you taste like earl grey which blends with the woody scent of your cologne in an intoxicating mixture. Much too soon for his liking you’re pulling back and he has to stop himself from whining at the loss of contact. 
His eyes flutter open to find you haven’t gone far. In the silence he thinks about how pretty your eyes are and maybe—no, definitely—that’s his new favorite color.
“Was that okay?” your voice is just above a whisper.
Theo just leans forward and recaptures your lips in another kiss. First his mind swirls with this is what kissing is supposed to feel like. He’s dumbfounded that it really can feel like fireworks and it’s not just some sappy bullshit made for the romance novels Pansy and Daphne read.
Then it all comes crashing down.
The next thing he feels is dread. Overwhelming, overpowering dread. He can’t quite place why, but it’s there. And suddenly he’s pulling away from your lips like he’s been burned.
He sees the shock on your face, but before he starts to apologize or explain, his father’s voice is itching in the back of his mind. He steps back.
Your voice saying his name is muffled by the ringing in his ears and your concerned expression is taken over by that all too familiar disappointed look in his father’s eyes. He runs away, feeling more like a coward than he’s ever felt in his life. 
And the worst part is he knows he’s leaving you alone, confused and hurt. But he does it anyway.
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After wandering the corridors of the castle for the better part of 10 minutes, lost in thought, he finds himself in front of the music room. Like his body instinctively knew where he needed to be. He pushes the door open, relieved to find it empty. The wooden stairs creak as he walks up. He sits on the rug by the piano, hugging his knees to his chest.
Theo is alone in the music room not 20 minutes before Mattheo finds him. A bloodhound that boy. Or maybe he just knows Theo too well. 
“Your little badger sent me.” Mattheo eases down onto the rug next to him, close enough for his knee to lightly graze Theo’s thigh. “He was freaking out like the world was ending or he kicked your cat or something. Didn’t know where to find you, but he did find Berk and I in the Astronomy tower. So I said I’d take care of it, you’re welcome.”
Theo just hums in acknowledgment.
“So…did he actually kick your cat or what?”
Theo shakes his head.
“Well it must have been pretty bad since you came here. Haven’t seen you hiding out here since, well—” his mum died. Mattheo doesn’t have to finish his sentence, they both know.
A long breath he didn’t realize he was holding breaks out in a sigh as his eyes shut. The soft enchanted piano music is the only sound for a moment as he wills away the emotions threatening to surface. “I don’t know, maybe the world is ending.”
A couple more beats of quiet. “Wanna talk about it?” He knows deep down it’s a question Matt will respect the answer to. And he briefly debates turning him down, but something compels him to slowly nod.
“He—we kissed.”
“Was it bad?”
“No.”
Mattheo nods as he considers the response he was given. “So the problem was that it was good?”
“Yes? No? Maybe?”
“That’s kinda dodging the question, mate.”
Theo groans, “I don’t know, okay?” He runs his fingers through his hair. “I just— cazzo! This is wrong, isn’t it? Feeling like this?”
“Theo—”
“I can’t feel this way for another guy. My father would disown me and it’d ruin my life. I’m supposed to marry a pureblood witch and produce an heir and—”
Before Theo has time to stop him or even process what’s happening, Mattheo is grabbing him by the face and pressing their lips together, and that same fluttering sensation is back. It’s not as strong and thrilling as kissing you, Theo’s not sure that’s even replicable, but it still feels nice in a way none of his previous kisses have been. Where he was going through the motions for some reason even he didn’t understand. But no, once again he can understand why people would want to do this.
Then as quick as he was pulled in, his best friend is pulling away, silently observing him for a moment.
“Did the world end?” 
“…No.”
“Then what’s the problem?”
They sit staring at each other as Theo’s brain struggles to formulate a response. 
“Matty, I—” he hesitates like this is going to be what destroys their friendship, “I don’t think I’m…straight.”
“I didn’t think you were.” 
And something about the way he says it makes Theo feel better. Like he’s not being judged or ridiculed for feeling this way. Like it’s something natural. A no-brainer, boring fact of life. Theo thinks he might cry. 
Instead he leans forward and connects their lips again, just briefly. And part of him knows Mattheo can feel the underlying sadness and fear in it. But when they pull apart once again, neither of them comment on it. A weight feels like it's been lifted off him.
“I think,” Theo pauses as he debates speaking about this out loud for the first time, like it will make it real. “I think I haven’t really felt like myself since my mum...y'know?” He says it like it’s a question, but they both know the truth. “I know it’s been 2 years, I should be fine. But I’m not.”
Mattheo, who had been quietly listening, speaks. “I don’t know Theo…I’ve barely heard you talk about her since you came back to school third year. Have you talked about it to anyone? Hell, have you let yourself grieve?”
“I…I don’t know how. My father stopped mentioning her after the funeral and—he barely acknowledged she was even gone.” He pulls his knees back up to his chest. “I miss her.”
He feels the comforting warmth of Matt’s hand on his shoulder blade. And the gentle touch of his thumb across his cheek, wiping a tear away is the first indication that he’s started to cry. He quickly sniffles in an attempt to stop the tears, but it doesn't work. If anything, it just makes them fall faster. He tucks his head down, forehead against his knees. Mattheo's hand gently rubs his back as they sit in silence as he cries. He's grateful Matt doesn't try to help by speaking, the gentle piano filling his ears like a warm hug after being lost in the cold for days with no reprieve.
The silent sobs eventually slow, his body no longer shaking from the force of them. And weirdly, he feels better. He’s spent his whole life being told that men don’t cry, especially pureblood wizards of their status, so when the weight comes off his chest he’s shocked at how easy it is to just breathe. 
He pulls his head up to look at Matt, who isn’t looking directly at him but keeps his hand on Theo’s back. A soft murmured, “thanks,” passes his lips and causes the curly haired boy to return his attention to him. Mattheo doesn’t comment on how red and tear-stained his eyes are, much to Theo’s relief. 
“You good, mate?”
“Yeah, I think so.”
Mattheo hesitates before speaking again, “you don’t have to listen to me, cause what do I know, but I think you should talk to him.” Theo thinks back to you, how lost and hurt you looked when he ran from the library and he sighs. 
“When did you get so wise?”
Mattheo shrugs, “we’ve all had to grow up pretty fast…you’re my best mate Theo. It sucks seeing you like this, y'know?” He lightly nudges Theo’s shoulder, “kinda ruins the vibe.”
Theo can’t help but chuckle, “you’re an idiot.”
“And here I thought I was wise.”
“I was wrong, you’re fully a dumbass.”
“Nah, that’s Enz. But seriously, talk to him. We’re all tired of you pretending this isn’t something you want, whether you realize it or not.”
Theodore reluctantly nods, “fine. Fine, you’re right. I think I like my, what did you call him? Little badger?”
Mattheo grins and shifts away from Theo, looking a bit too happy for a man that just watched his friend cry over a crush.
“What are you so cheery about?” Theo raises an eyebrow as Mattheo gets up to return to the Astronomy Tower.
Mattheo throws a smirk over his shoulder as he lingers at the top of the stairs, “Enzo owes me a hundred galleons.”
“Wait! You two idioti bet on this?!”
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Despite feeling somewhat better after his talk with Matt, Theo avoids you for the rest of the week. Come Wednesday morning, he’s sliding into the seat next to Mattheo in History of Magic, ignoring Enzo’s annoyed “Hey!” in protest and Mattheo’s side-eye.
He doesn’t turn around to see the disappointed look on your face as your books softly thunk on the desk behind him where you two usually sat. But he doesn’t miss the lack of usual flair the sound has. His heart aches.
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“Riddle said you’d be in here.”
Your voice breaks through Theodore’s thoughts, pulling his eyes toward you walking up the steps and over to him.
He'd been finding himself coming back to the music room over and over again since he started avoiding you. He wasn't entirely sure why, maybe he just wanted to stop the dull ache of loneliness in the absence of you. He pushes the thought out of his mind.
You settle down on the rug next to him, jarringly similar to the position he'd been in with Mattheo a week ago. Only you were further away, and while he couldn't blame you, he hated it.
“Sorry for kissing you so suddenly, I just—I’d been wanting to for like a month and I guess I was hoping you wanted it too. I didn’t mean to scare you off.”
He quickly shakes his head, “no, don’t apologize, it was—I liked it. I’m sorry for running off like that. I think I got…overwhelmed. I didn’t exactly know I was, y’know, into guys before…you.” He forces it out despite his embarrassment, cheeks a light shade of pink.
You look at him with a small, somewhat sad smile, “it’s fine. Kinda reminds me of that day we properly met in Hogsmeade. You ran then too.” You pause briefly before adding, “and don’t worry about it, this is new for me too.”
Theo flushes more intensely at the memory as you turn your head to look around the music room. “I don’t think I’ve ever been in here before. Riddle had to give me directions...Why here?”
His mouth goes dry as he stares at you. “My, uh, my mum used to play the piano. She tried to teach me, but I couldn’t fully get it before…” he trails off for a moment before pushing past it, “I come here to feel close to her.”
A look of realization passes over your face, “oh, I—I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay. I don’t really like to talk about it.”
A hesitant hand reaches out to rest on his knee. He didn’t even realize he’d relaxed his legs down from his chest. 
“We don’t have to talk about it, Teddy—”
He gasps at the nickname, soft and filled with raw emotion. “I want to.”
“She was… the only person I felt truly got me, before Mattheo at least. And she uh, she used to call me Teddy. So since she—” he hesitates, the finality of it all hitting him at once like it’s the first time he heard the news all over again, “since she died, I haven’t let anyone call me that.”
He sees the way your eyes soften further, but it’s not from pity, like he’d come to expect from the topic, no, it’s deeper than that. It’s empathy. “I didn’t know,” your voice is quiet, like you’re about to apologize, but truthfully that’s the last thing he wants. So he keeps speaking.
“She would have loved you.” His hand shifts to rest over yours, still on his leg. “She would have loved how…happy you make me. So, I want you to call me Teddy, please.” It comes out a bit more desperate than he intended, but when did anything ever go as planned when it came to you?
But you don’t run. You don’t look at him in disgust for showing emotion. You just nod with a soft, “okay Teddy.”
And god, that fluttering sensation is back. A small smile tugs on his lips; before he knows it he’s leaning forward, needing to be closer, as close as you’ll possibly let him. And this time, without any guilt or shame or fear, he kisses you.
And he feels like he’s drowning. Drowning in your lips, in your scent, in you. Like water filling his lungs, it burns so sweet. Surrender to the unknown, letting his lingering heartache and worries about his father’s expectations go until all that’s left is you.
It’s pure bliss. 
As your lips move together in sync, his body heats up and he finds himself craving more. He’s just received a taste, but he can already tell he’s going to be insatiable; the need to devour you, to become one with your very essence, is overwhelming. But he doesn’t run away. He pushes deeper. 
He feels your hand cupping his face, almost to steady yourself from falling over as his tongue brushes against your lips, begging, pleading for mercy. Like he’ll fall apart if you don’t let him explore every inch of you. Your lips part. 
Tongues dancing together, he pushes you down until your back hits the rug, his torso hovering over yours as his hands on either side of you hold him up. Your fingers caress his cheek, touch featherlight. 
The kiss lasts until neither of you can breathe, parting only to gasp and pant, inches from each other’s face. You suddenly laugh, a sweet sound that rivals the room’s quiet piano in its beauty.
“You’re still here,” your eyes search his, like you’re trying to find doubt in them, but there is none. He wants to kiss you like that for the rest of his life.
“I don’t think I’m scared anymore.”
Your arms coming up to wrap around his neck and pull him back into another kiss catches him off guard, but he melts into it like his body was made to meld with yours. It’s soft and sweet and feels like home.
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The next morning at breakfast, you’re sitting next to him like you belong at the Slytherin table, at his side and getting acquainted with his friends. Enzo’s in the middle of asking you for details on which Hufflepuffs have the best weed when Draco comes over and sits down, an apprehensive look on his face. “I suppose this is something you just expect us to get used to?” 
“Yes.” It’s Mattheo who speaks, grabbing a bit of toast off Draco’s plate and taking a bite. “He makes Theo happy, he’s one of us now as far as I’m concerned.”
Enzo pipes up from beside him, “I’ll do anything to never have to listen to Theo hopelessly pine like that ever again.”
Draco huffs and as Theo’s about to say something, he hears you laugh softly next to him as your hand gently squeezes his thigh. “Just gonna have to live with some yellow brightening your mornings, Malfoy.” The other two boys snicker at the defeated look on Draco’s face and start to tease him that he’s just jealous Nott grew a pair and managed to ask someone out. But Theo barely notices.
He presses a kiss to your temple, heart fluttering as you grin up at him and for the first time in a long time, he’s happy.
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