#is that a terrible thought to have? am I a bad person?

[miraculouslbcnreactions]

"Him guilting Ladybug into staying quiet is why Lila is able to maintain her power for 4 more seasons."

I mean, I would blame more the writers for taking way too long to have Adrien realize his advice was bad.

(Post the quote is from)

Reminder that I am never actually blaming the characters, they are not real people. That's why this is explicitly a writing blog. In the context of the writing, yes, the pacing of everything Lila was terrible and is the real source of the issues. That doesn't change the fact that Adrien is the main narrative tool used to keep Marinette in line, thus me "blaming" him.

As you said, Adrien looks bad here not because he didn't understand how to handle the situation and gave bad advice, but because it takes him so long to realize that his advice was bad and apologize.

During Lila's first appearance, we see Adrien chastises Ladybug for being too mean to Lila, never once acknowledging that it was valid for Ladybug to be upset (S1E26). She is painted as fully in the wrong even though Lila was actively manipulating him and Ladybug arguably protected him here:

Adrien: Wait! Lila! (Lila runs away) Hey, what was that all about? Uh, I mean, weren't you kinda harsh with her? Ladybug: I...I don't put up with lies, especially when they're about me. (yo-yos away)

During Lila's second appearance (or, at least her second appearance where she actually interacts with the cast) he further drives that message home by telling Marinette to let Lila lie to people because he's more worried about hurting Lila's feelings than he is about removing Lila's power (S3E01):

Adrien: Are you going to tell everyone? Marinette: 'Course I am. Lila is— Adrien: (interrupting) A liar. Yes, I know. But do you really think exposing her will make things better? If you humiliate her, she'll just be hurt more. Making a bad guy suffer has never turned them into a good guy. Lila: Ladybug and I are like two peas in a pod. Marinette: So we just stand by and let her lie? Adrien: As long as you and I both know the truth, does it really matter? Marinette: You're right, maybe it's not such a big deal.

We'll circle back to how terrible this advice was in a second. First lets finish off going through the sequence of events.

And finally, at the tail end of season five, Adrien openly acknowledges that he's been giving terrible advice (S5E20):

Adrien: I'm sorry, Marinette. I was wrong. I shouldn't have told you to not act against Lila. If you give the slightest opportunity to people like her, they'll grasp at it and cause disasters in no time. And now, you're the one who looks like a bad person. Marinette: (reaches out to hold his hand beside her) You thought you were doing the right thing. Just like with Chloe. That's another reason why I love you, Adrien. You always want to see the good in other people. But sometimes, the good we think we see in some people is just a reflection of our own, and we end up being fooled by our own kindness. (They squeeze each other's hands.) But we'll find a way to expose Lila eventually.

If we look at these three moments in a vacuum, this is honestly a good character arc for a character like Adrien. He's a peace keeper, which is a wonderful match to Marinette's blind justice approach. It's good that Adrien is there to balance her out! It's also good for him to learn that his approach doesn't always work and that you can't always keep the peace.

The problem is that Adrien didn't actually get a functional character arc where he learned those lessons. The episodes are so drawn out that it doesn't feel like we watch him grow and learn. His apology is almost three full seasons after his second bit of bad advice, leaving us to wonder when he changed his mind because Lila does a lot of awful things during those three seasons. What moment made him realize that he was in the wrong here? We don't know, so this feels less like growth and more like the writers throwing in a scene to shut up fans who were still complaining about Adrien's terrible advice even though it had been four real world years since he actually gave it.

There's also the issue that Adrien tells Marinette, "making a bad guy suffer has never turned them into a good guy." This line implies that Adrien's goal is to help Lila change. The problem is that we never see him do that. He doesn't try to help Lila. The most we get is him making a deal with Lila to protect Marinette, but that's not him helping Lila change. He doesn't approach that conversation as if he's trying to help Lila see that what she did was wrong. He approaches it as if he knows that she won't change. It's less trying to make Lila a better person and more a deal with the devil:

Adrien: (sits next to Lila) I warned you once already, Lila, but you didn't listen. You hurt my friend Marinette, and that's not okay. Lila: Me? Hurting Marinette? But she's the one who- Adrien: I don't know how to prove you lied, Lila, because you're good at it. So you'll just have to come up with another lie, just as convincing. Only this time it's gonna prove Marinette's innocent. Lila: Why would I do that, Adrien? Adrien: Because we're friends, aren't we?

Minor Chloe rant incoming:

This is yet another situation where it would be so much better for the show if Adrien had actually done something to help Chloe change and succeeded. If he did that, thought it was a good path for everyone, and then tried to do the same thing for Lila, then this could have been a really great way to set him up for dealing with his dad. To teach him that you can only help people who want to be better without having everyone he tries to help stay "evil" as that's pretty depressing. As-is, we've literally seen him say that Chloe will never change so why does he believe that Lila can change? They're not portraying him as an optimist, they're portraying him as delusional. Terrible writing. Zero stars.

Rant over.

By the way, the above quote was the 24th episode of season three, roughly two seasons before Adrien's apology to Marinette. If he's viewing Lila as the devil here, then this should be where we get that apology. Or Adrien should approach this as him trying to make Lila better and Lila should play along, making Adrien think that he's right and that he's helping her change. Either approach would be better than the nonsense canon gave us.

In a well written show, this would all go down over the course of a single season or even just a few episodes. As-is, the season five apology feels like too little too late. What little kid is going to be able to follow this "character arc" and learn the lesson that Adrien maybe sort of learned? Casual viewers will likely not even remember that Adrien gave Marinette bad advice back at the start of season three because why would they? This is not how you do a good subplot. It's almost as drawn out as the Gabriel plot and that's insane! A subplot is supposed to be a short story within the story so that things feel like they're moving forward.

[californiaquail]

i have to bitch about my stupid fucking workplace or i'll die

ok i had a hot second where i thought it was getting better and i might be able to stick it out for long enough to not look terrible on my resume but then today my boss snapped SO hard at me literally just for doing my job and it almost made me cry. he usually has a huge stick up his ass about getting to people very promptly so when somebody pulled up outside who he needed to talk to my coworker said "oh go let him know mrs so and so is here" so i went over and he happened to be talking to his office manager whose dog has pancreatitis so i waited for a pause in the conversation and then said "mrs so and so is outside" and he was like "yeah i'll GET to it when i'm DONE with this" in such a forceful and bitchy tone that it made me physically recoil and say "ok just letting you know!" in a much nicer tone than i needed to and then i was struggling not to cry for the next 30 minutes for the crime of doing what i was told.

FURTHERMORE someone who previously held my position dropped her cat off today and they were all shit talking her behind her back and i've literally never heard them talk about previous assistants in any other way like it's always oh she was dumb oh she was such a know it all oh he hated her. i said "oh she seemed nice when i talked to her" because she was and my coworker was like "well when i came back to this job after taking a break he told me i had two jobs; to help [other tech] and get rid of her." so apparently this asshole literally will not just say it to the faces of his employees and just psychologically tortures them into quitting which really makes me think he's trying to do the same to me which is a realization i had many weeks ago but i was trying to believe i was making it up because i'm insane but i guess i'm NOT. to make this situation better one of the (two) techs is leaving after this week to go back to school and the other one doesn't work on fridays so i'm about to be the ONLY person to do all the animal restraining shit cleaning medical note taking prescription filling etc and his office manager leaves after 1 so phone calls after that too. for a man who openly dislikes me and does not speak to me at all if he doesn't have to. i asked the tech who's not leaving for advice and she said yeah have everything you can ready because as you can see he does as little work as possible. and i was like oh so we're all seeing that and you're just letting yourselves get walked all over and doing all of the work for him ok. then she reiterated what i already knew about not letting him see me not doing anything. then she told me "just pick up the phone and don't wait for someone to tell you you can" whole time i was never actually told that i'm supposed to be picking up phone calls i just started doing it when they weren't available because they told me to but i'm frequently unable to answer people's questions because i Just Fucking Started and i've never worked in a vet clinic before. and then i'm made to feel like i'm obnoxious for not knowing things and asking questions. if you are having issues with your employees being know it alls maybe you should stop making them feel like shit for not knowing things? also it is SO fucking bold of him to treat me like shit on his shoe when i am as mentioned about to be the only fucking person on fridays and one of two people the rest of the week. if you want me to quit so bad say it to my fucking face like a goddamn adult and clean the dog shit your damn self or make your poor office manager do it since you won't deign to do normal animal care tasks. he doesn't even have any fucking job postings up even though he's supposedly soooo short staffed (he is obviously but maybe he just doesn't care because he never does any of the work) and i know because i'm on all the job groups and on craigslist and indeed etc all the time because i hate this damn job and want one where everyone doesn't dislike me.

TO BE CLEAR i have been doing my level best this whole time despite being suicidally depressed (largely from this stupid fucking job) and exhausted from having to get up at 6:20 am to catch the bus, i have done everything i've been told to do to the best of my ability without complaining even shit like scrubbing the dead dog freezer or cleaning and reorganizing random ancient stuff no one has thought about in ten years or pointlessly cleaning things that aren't dirty just to look busy, i am always professional and polite to clients and my coworkers, i am often the first person there in the mornings and the last to clock out, i never bother him with questions because i learned very quickly he somehow doesn't have the answers to anything practical about how his business runs because he's comfortable being tech illiterate and making other people do it for him. as far as i can tell his dislike of me is literally just because i have god awful auditory processing so it takes me a while to understand verbal instructions and i have to ask people to say things again or repeat things back a lot. like he literally hates me for the crime of being a little slow and ? not automatically knowing ten million highly specific to this job and clinic things? i get paid $18/hr my rent for my room with my obnoxious preachy landlord costs WELL over half my paycheck i get absolutely no benefits i didn't even receive a contract or any kind of legal forms except a w2. broadly speaking i would consider myself a pretty patient person but now i'm just deeply pissed off and fucking broke on top of it. i think i'm going to give it one or two fridays to see how bad it really is and if it's as bad as i'm anticipating it would be generous of me to give two weeks' notice. and then does anyone think it would be detrimental to acquiring future jobs if i were to work in the weed industry? i can't tell if it would look bad to non weed employers but there's a listing for greenhouse people which i think sounds awesome. if you read this whole thing we will have an autumn wedding

[chiefguideandcentre]

I hate when you’re at a 4 way stop and it’s your turn to go but some Karen in some big SUV she doesn’t need takes your turn and when you make a “what the hell are you doing” motion (bc it’s deserved and she needs to know she is an idiot) she proceeds to act all annoyed and flips you off as if you’re the problem like how about you learn to drive and be courteous on the road you sentient piece of shit

[starlightswait]

GONNA THROW UP GINNA HAVE A OANIC ATTACK GONNA COMBUST

[early-october-skies]

Me when we don't speak anymore by bears in trees

[crowley1990]

I think I should be given adhd meds. As a treat.

[wavesoutbeingtossed]

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[byakuyasdarling]

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[m-a-d-e-l-e-i-n-e]

Is it normal to be so obsessed with the idea of being a good or I guess even unproblematic person, to the point where you’re nit-picking every single little thing you say or do and feel like shit about yourself for not always fitting your own idea of being a “perfect” person? …what do you mean “no”?

[sschmendrick]

Maybe I should go back to seeing my therapist, he was a good person, à l'écoute, but maybe I should explain why I stopped seeing him (on top of work load becoming unbearable).

Same with my psychiatrist though I think it'll be harder to see her because of the summer.

[lit-in-thy-heart]

coming to the conclusion that trying to write fic again might make me feel more confident in my own abilities when it comes to other writing

[trans-estinien]

Sometimes I feel like doing this with my brain

[wonder-falcon]

the male drews are so tiktok thirst trap icky stop this madness….

not the girls tho y’all stay safe out there ✊🥰

[emmafaeru]

me going into a seemingly chill queer discord server, ready to chat with people: "Haha, people must be joking about how toxic the peeps in discord servers are!! I'm sure I'll find some cool people to talk to and get over my fear of social interation slightly!!"

me, leaving the same discord server two hours later, blood on my face and clothes in tatters, ribs broken and breathing hard: "I'm never fucking going back in there again"

[gatun-gatunesco]

...

[observethewalrus]

i just do not get twitter. everyone’s angry about something or someone but they’re all vagueposting and won’t actually say what’s going on. i can’t even follow along with the drama in replies cuz each individual comment can have its own replies and suddenly you’re 20 posts removed from the original thread. discourse there is toxic af and I instantly regret opening the app