#is still like 30+ other people i can make out with and go out on a date with myself if i feel lonely

[misshunterskye]

in which zayne turns your bad day into an amazing night ... a one shot i wrote because i got kind of sad and thought about how zayne would probably be an amazing & comforting presense. so we got this out of that lol.

You're having an absolutely awful day. You come into your apartment, trying to think about anything that isn't your work load, your training schedule, and your lack of food intake. Your stomach growls in protest, and as you slam your purse down onto the counter, you realize that it will probably be another 2 hours before Zayne gets home to hang with you.

And you can't help it. You start sobbing. You're still sobbing 5 minutes later when Zayne rings your phone. You sniffle a few time trying to calm down before answering. You still still sound awful when you pick up with a timid and weak: "Hey."

There's a pause on the other end of the phone, and you can almost see him analyzing the situation. "You sound like you're having a bad day, my love."

And it's that simple acknowledgment. The way he knows you enough to know exactly what's wrong. That something is wrong. Most of the time, people buy your fake smile.

Zayne doesn't.

"Well, lucky enough, I was calling to tell you my last patient cancelled, and I'm ahead on my paperwork. I'm already on my way to you."

A smile breaks over your face, "Yeah?"

"Yeah. I'll see you in just a second."

In about 30 minutes, you hear the door open and shut. There's a bit of shuffling, so you go to meet him in the foyer -- and see him carrying a bouquet of your favorite flowers, a grocery bag of your favorite snacks, and take out dinner.

It's almost enough to make you cry again, but this time out of pure happiness. You take the bouquet from him, and before he can even say anything, you're kissing him deeply.

"I love you," you say, in between kisses. "I'm so lucky to have you."

He chuckles against your lips. "I love you too. Come on, my love, let's get settled in. I want to hear all about what's wrong."

[sovonight]

why is so much of sewing just tracing and cutting and tracing again q_q i see why people get projectors and use adobe illustrator now

[gemharvest]

Hate thissss I feel like I haven't been properly productive today (somehow posting two art things Doesn't register properly in my mind) so I wanna stay up to get as much as I can down, but I also need to go to sleep in case I'm called in tomorrow because fuuuuuck going to work on little sleep that shit sucks. But also, the possibility of being called in makes me wanna stay up even more, so I can finish art in case I don't have time tomorrow. So now I'm sat up at 12:30 tired as shit but unable to draw or go to bed. The never-ending cycle of hell.

[lucalicatteart]

cannot resist using the polls to make up a little collaborative story lol.. Not sure how much I can keep it up with my low energy/health problems lol, but I'll try to draw a new picture (+ write a small text blurb and new action options to vote on) each day based on the past day's results, at least for a while. Kind of like a 'sketch a day' type challenge, except story based with votes choosing what happens next. :0

[milfbrainrot]

thinking a lot about separatist attitudes on here that have done more harm than good in the past

remembering how when i was younger it was common to reblog posts about discrimination etc with a disclaimer in ur tag that you don't personally experience what's being talked about, or at least something on ur blog listing out ur privileges. and like, privacy concerns aside, i also remember when it then became Problematic to do tags because it's a Reminder to the minority op that... other people exist and were trying to make the post about themselves or something?

like maybe the argument was that it came off like a way to get points for reblogging a post about oppression while not experiencing it urself, even though... in my experience the reason we did that was because our identity labels determined what we could/couldn't do in the eyes of our surveilling mutuals. if i reblogged a post about racism without clarifying my own identity, people might assume i wasn't white and put my opinions through a lens i shouldn't have had, because i also fully believed the idea that only people who experience a thing can have valid opinions on it.

it also determined whether you were Allowed to reblog posts with certain slurs, or reblog posts about something as simple as listening to music if it was from a blog with bpd in the handle but you didn't have bpd because listening to music with a mental illness makes it... different somehow. so you needed to be as transparent as possible so people could judge your morality appropriately and it was normal to want that because otherwise what are you trying to hide and don't you want to improve? etc. and i do think, superiority complexes aside, people did think they were doing a good thing when they'd send me asks like "hey you reblogged a video where a black person says the n slur but you're white so you shouldn't be communicating that by extension!!!"

like of course we have to keep our own privileges in mind when discussing certain topics. it does have an impact, something something intersectionality. but the culture around this being SO micromanagy and invasive seemed to create more divides because relating to people with different experiences was Bad and trying to be supportive was impossible to do in The Right Way.

we need to be more critical of the info we get, of course! but being in a tumblr sphere where you could only listen to minorities about their oppression meant that when some black blogger said it was fetishistic to find people of color attractive, i went "okay i won't do that then!!" instead of realizing... hey maybe barring myself off from finding anyone who isn't white attractive as an attempt to not be racist is in fact looping right back around to being racist. you need to be mindful of what that attraction entails and how to go about relationships fairly etc, but it was basically asking us to find people of color unattractive????? which kinda sounds fucked up!

and that doesn't even begin to cover how so many minorities have different opinions on things, and then i later realized if i could be wrong and change my opinions about things related to my own identity that's not a solid mindset to have. "listen to minorities instead of platforming oppressors about these matters" got totally misconstrued into listening to takes that make no sense from 15yr olds who had been identifying as lesbians for 2 months total, because ur made out to be an idiot who can't think for urself if you don't share an experience. i say this as a lesbian but lesbians seemed to spearhead so much aphobia that it was justified because welp, gotta listen to lesbians and other queer people about this even though they haven't yet unpacked the personal issues that come along with intersectionality yet! and ofc, ignoring the queer people who did support aces and aros because that was decided to be homophobic to do.

i think we can go forward into these conversations consciously without going so hard about it that we end up creating new walls between us and anyone different, but thinking it's okay because These Walls Say I'm A Good Person For It. like, back to the disclaimer tagging, i feel like if i made a post abt lesbian stuff and ppl were tagging it with a disclaimer abt being straight it would be weird but appreciated that it's solidarity from people i wouldn't have expected it from at the time.

i also think that having microlabels and split attraction and all these different ways of letting people embrace queer relatability (for example, since this applies to some things more than others) even if they're not the traditional definition of the label is a good thing because more investment and support for an oppressed community can only be a good thing in the end. but no, you can't have an icon of a character of color if ur white, even though doing so would help other people find the show and therefore support it!

we are all so much more similar than we are different and as long as people are mindful of their experiences versus those of others in the right contexts, and as much as i get why people did want to treat their tumblr circles like locked forums where they wouldn't have to deal with cis people asking questions or having misconceptions on their posts... i just don't think the infighty/hostile ways we went about it and still do go about it sometimes ended up as helpful as people treated it to be.

but whatever, tumblr is tumblr.

[iliveinprocrasti-nationn]

one thing abt being disabled/chronically ill that some people don’t get is that sometimes body maintenance that ensures you have the absolute minimum amount of function can also be something that takes away a lot of control and autonomy. you can argue till the cows come home that making those decisions to try and help yourself (or realistically to try to make sure things aren’t worse than they already are) is something that exhibits control and autonomy and stuff, but they can be so limiting in practice because they’re things that take up so much time but have to be done to do anything else

[daddy-long-legssss]

me after three days of in-person meetings and team-building activities.

[angeltism]

oh to be part of rentarou's massive sapphic polycule

[girlcockholmes]

now that my PI is like hey you should actually be sitting in the lab to write instead of doing it at home im shooting one million lasers at his head in my mind. fuck off

[lilowoof]

Time to be whimsical on a sunday night.

But I've been thinking about my upcoming bday (mainly what I wanna do for it/where to eat lmao). But something else that has been on my mind is that in a few years I will be entering my 30s. And I am strangely excited for it??

The mid to late 20's have been really hard on me and honestly, I wasn't expecting to still be around to ever reach my 30s. But here I am! I finished my main schooling!!! And while I am suffering with some sort of mental boo boos, I am slowly learning more about myself and slowly trying to let go of all the past demons. It's taking time but eventually I will be ok again.

I have the power to get out there to meet new ppl, and ppl who are around the same cycle of life as I am. And it's exciting to think about! While I would love to devote most of my time to salmon running, I've lately come to realize that I wanna put my time more into my life on top of that. Meet someone who I can actually connect and grow with. Where I can still salmon run and game but also experience more in the life ahead of me! (and perhaps some couple gaming? I've always liked that in past relationships hehhe)

Do I wanna get married? IDK! But damn do I want to get proposed to. And I wanna go to more events in the city!!! And more P!nk concerts (tho it's getting to be a bit too expensive now hahah...)

LIKE. Life ain't perfect and I am anticipating some hard upcoming struggles. I am still dealing with financial abuse and repairing my savings after those issues. BUT LIKE. LIFE is still going, and I can try my best to make it the best it can be!!!!

[arionaleilani]

1. it’s my 24th birthday today, so my goal of being published by the time i’m 25 is now a one year looming monster, but i never specified what kind of published and am currently looking in various literary magazines that are recommended for writers who have yet to be published, so i’m surprisingly confident that i can make it work? and tbh even if whatever i write isn’t officially published before my 25th birthday, if i have someone in the process of being published then i’ll be happy!! no matter what though, i’m gonna try to be proud of myself for at least giving it my best shot!!

2. i honestly love that my birthday is on the ides of march because the ides of march meme shitposting is only a thing on tumblr but it also being my birthday makes it easier to like. be excited about the ides of march outside of tumblr. like even in person i can be like “it’s my birthday! i’m an ides of march babe (:” and if someone is like oh what’s that? or if they say something along the lines of oh like julius caesar? i can be like yep!! and even if it’s a small thing outside of tumblr it brings me immense enjoyment and amusement being able to bring it up off of tumblr

3. transportation situation has been very rough since june 2023 when i totalled my car, my gap insurance are being assholes and i ended up putting my foot down on the phone with them yesterday which i’m pretty proud of because i am NOT a confrontational person (something i’ve been working on this past year, so seeing some improvement with my ability to hold my ground and not be a pushover yesterday was very cool!!) i was told i’d get a response from them by friday next week no matter what, and if i don’t then friday of next week i will continue to wreak havoc upon them. but my moms car which i’ve been using since my accident broke down yesterday, hopefully it’s fixable but my parents were saying it might be done for, so trying to think of how i’m gonna get to work next week is kind of stressing me out lmao, but for now i’m just gonna focus on enjoying my birthday the best i can because i don’t want to start off being 24 with an overwhelming anxiety for something that won’t be a potential issue until monday. plus i already messaged my boss today to let her know that i’m going to do everything i can to make it work out but just so she’s in the loop and knows of the potential of me not being able to make my morning shifts (one of my coworkers said she’s more than happy to give me a ride for our afternoon shifts which does help relieve some of the stress!) and i told her i’d let her know for sure sunday so that if necessary she can have time to figure out someone to fill in for me in the mornings!

overall: life is weird and i ended being 23 yesterday with a shitty situation but a positive outlook and i am going to enjoy my first day of being 24 no matter what because honestly i fucking earned it. happy friday everyone, i hope it’s a good day for you and me both!

[spideyladman]

Thinking about the disturbing implications of Cain's story and destiny from the Bible rn

[amrv-5]

BUREAUCRATIC NONSENSE!!!!!!

[friendlessclown]

why are ppl so fuckign scaryyy :(((

[lucalicatteart]

Poll adventure (paventure? lol) Day 9: read the small story tidbit below the poll for more details, OR just vote based on initial impression

(✦ see past poll results + further information HERE (link) ✦)

Yesterday's poll helped The Adventurer build his raft...

"After two hours of fumbling about with tangled rope and tree branches, he's finally produced something that at least.. mostly, looks like a normal raft. He attaches a few extra flowers for decoration, loops his cat into a makeshift safety harness (so they can't get lost in the water), then gives everything one last check before deciding it's all ready to go, nervously pushing off into the river...

Surprisingly, it floats just fine. As long as he doesn't make any sudden movements, the raft doesn't threaten to flip over, or even wobble nearly as much as he expected. There's no way to really steer or paddle, but he does have a large stick he occasionally uses to push himself away from rocks or other obstacles. Luckily, the current is very slow at this section of the river, and hopefully will remain so for his entire trip.

Just lazily floating around, he estimates he should travel about 4 hours to fully get past the blocked road and end up at the next area on his map. Though the raft is too small (and too lumpy) to comfortably lay on, he can still recline slightly, bathing in the near afternoon sun, watching the scenery slowly drift by....

About 30 minutes into his first ever sailing adventure, he feels the water shift as a larger boat comes near. He can't see it clearly yet, but it seems to be nice - polished wood with painted sections and little flags draped along the sides, presumably some sort of actual steering and propelling mechanisms, and about 10 people lounging on the surface, maybe having some sort of party..? It's been very quiet so far, these are the first other travelers he's seen in the entire area today... Should he attempt to make contact with them? "

--------

Additional details -

Boat Make-up : Based on the results of the last poll (where people helped him make a boat by choosing the amount of materials) -- With 30% branches and 21% rope, there's only a 9% difference between them, so both are in pretty close amounts, which means there's a TON of rope. (normal ratio would be like 65% wood and 10% rope lol). I probably should have even added more, but it's so visually busy, just pretend there's extra rope wrapped under the boat too.

30% branch and 15% fabric means there's about half as much fabric as there is wood, which is also A LOT for just a little side decoration, so I made the flag huge, and a square of fabric for the cat to sit on. 10% berries means that there's enough ink for 1/3 of the wood to be entirely covered in purple designs. The least amount was the twigs and leaves for padding, which would cover a little under 1/3 of the wood (laid on top). then a little over 1/3 of the space is flowers for decor, which are just kind of sitting in a pile on top, with a few actually tied down onto the flag or other areas.

Since the branches were pretty close in percentage to all other things (not like 80% branches and 20% all other materials), the raft is fairly small, as not much wood was used.

main goal: follow his map to reach the abandoned castle ruins and see the rare animal specialist about the mysterious egg he has

[veinpursuer]

WHERE’S MY FUKING CAPO