#is star trek a children's show

[forsooth-verily]

I know they've been hinting at Janekotay this whole time but they really went there this mirror ep

"ooooh SOMEone's ready to go to the admiral's ready room"

Is my new fave euphemism, btw.

He's so ready, Dal, he's not leaving that ready room until neither of them can walk. But it's a kid's show so they can't say that, but they sure as hell animated the look

[bumblingbabooshka]

Concept: Vulcan clowns that exist solely to exhibit and discourage illogical behavior for children.

[not-equippedforthis]

why am i crying over space children. jake going against his father's orders just to teach nog how to read im bawling my eyes out. sisko being so proud of him at the end. oh my god.

[exasperatedoctopus]

If I had a nickel for every time there was a surprise child that suddenly and rapidly grew from an infant into an adult in Star Trek, I’d have two nickels, which really ought to tell you something about the state of child-centric storylines in Star Trek

[whimseysthrone]

Star Trek: Prodigy follow-up

I finished the first season. Wow. I know I just wrote about Prodigy last week, but I have to weigh in again. Continue reading Star Trek: Prodigy follow-up

[anotherpapercut]

CORRECT THANK YOU FOR SHARING

[macadam]

Oh yeah I have been up in the forest and will not be back til June btw, if anyone was wondering why I didn’t respond to their message/tagged/ask. Internet is scarce up here

[episodicnostalgia]

Star Trek: The Next Generation, 116 (Feb. 13, 1988) - “When the Bough Breaks”

Written by: Hannah Louise Shearer Directed by: Kim Manners

The Breakdown

The Enterprise is checking out a sector of space where an ancient mythological race known as the Aldeans supposedly live.  They are said to be so technologically advanced that they’ve hidden all evidence of their existence (including their planet) using cloaks and shields, allowing them to focus on space-poetry instead of space-enemies. Conveniently, just as Riker is explaining all of this the entire Aldean planet de-cloaks, and announces that they are totally peaceful; apparently, they would like to make an offer that would be 100% mutually beneficial.  The Aldeans explain that they can no longer procreate, and their planetary computer can’t figure out why (none of them are actual scientists anymore, their computer just does everything for them).  Their solution/offer is to take a handful of the Enterprise’s children and raise them as their own, but Riker answers with a flat “no” on behalf of the parents, presumably because he’s never had to babysit before.  Not ones to take no for an answer, the Aldeans simply beam the kids they want directly off the Enterprise, which for some unfathomable reason includes Wesley Crusher (a rare alien race that doesn’t want to kill him for a change). 

Picard is adamant that the children be returned, but the Aldeans are equally resolute, and since their super-computer vastly out powers any offensive that Starfleet could throw at them, the captain is short on solutions.  However, the since the Aldeans aren’t overtly evil, they offer (as payment) an exchange of information about the known galaxy, which would take the federation centuries to discover on their own; if Picard refuses, they’ll push the Enterprise to the other side of the Galaxy.  See?  They’re not so unreasonable after all

Under the pretense of “taking time to negotiate an agreement”, Picard stalls long enough for Beverly Crusher figure out the reason the Aldean people are sterile is due to radiation poisoning, since the planetary shield generator is destroying their ozone.  Seeing as all of them are lazy good-for-nothing artists (they don’t care about learning mathematics or sciences of any kind) they’ve been wholly unable to figure this out for themselves. But worst of all, the radiation would subject their newfound child-captives to the same fate.  Fortunately, they are able to see reason and return the children to their families; unfortunately they also return Wesley.  The Aldeans resolve to re-learn how to taking care of themselves (instead of just having fun all the time, as selfish artists are known to do), and the children learn that going to school and learning Calculus is indisputably vital for everyone (although one guest-star parent concedes that art is fine too, as long as you learn math).

The Verdict.

There is virtually nothing about this episode that I enjoyed.  I could go on about how little I care for Wesley, but even without him ‘When the Bough Breaks’ is just insufferably boring, and dumb.  Clearly the writers were trying to make some kind point against indulging in ‘too much of a good thing’. There’s also a comparison to the Aldeans ozone crisis mirroring “20th century earth”, but any relevant allegory is mired in the conceit that freedom from suffering inherently results in laziness and intellectual negligence. 

By this episode’s logic, 24th century earth should then be filled with tons of lazy-good-for-nothings, selfishly living off the benefits of a post-scarcity world.  But according to Trek-Lore, humanity didn’t travel into space out of economic necessity, they did it to explore and seek knowledge for the pure sake of it.  Why would the Aldeans be any different? Historically, many of our most educated people have had the privilege of not constantly fighting for survival (at least for a portion of their lives), allowing the freedom of exploration and experimentation.  Obviously, that hasn’t always been the case, and a I’m not going to suggest that humanity never benefits from having challenges and struggles to overcome, but I refute the idea that people only seek knowledge and advancement out of necessity.  Additionally, art and science have seldom flourished independently of the other, and often go hand in hand.

Also, what exactly were the Aldean’s plans once the Enterprise left?  They state their intention for the children to procreate one day (before they find out the cause of their sterility), but did they seriously mean for a dozen kids to repopulate an entire planet?  I’m no expert, but it occurs to me there might be some problems with inbreeding.  And what if the kids don’t want to pair up and mate when they get older? Why not offer to take in children who have no families and need a home?  Surely they’re going to need thousands of kids to make a difference, and it’s been established that even the Federation has orphans.  There are just too many places where the story falls apart for me to accept the premise.

The ONLY good thing about this episode is the reveal of the Aldean super-computer (they call it the Custodian), which actually looks pretty cool.  That alone earns ½ a star, giving this episode a sum total rating of…

½ a star (out of five)

Additional Observations

There’s a very compartmentalized bias being expressed here that seemingly argues heavily in favour of a standardized public (aka western) education.  I’m all for teaching children the math's and sciences (indeed, I’m generally in favour of accessible education for all), but surely a utopian society could find a way to offer them, that doesn’t require calculus to be taught in a boring classroom setting.

For a super luxurious civilization, the Aldeans have a pretty dull looking world.  Just lots of walls with very few windows, which is a shame since that purple sky would presumably be very pretty to look at.

At one point Beverly Crusher visits Wesley to see how he’s holding up with his new adoptive captors.  While there, she hands him a medical tricorder to ‘discreetly’ scan the Aldeans for clues to their condition, but Wesley is so obvious that it almost plays like a looney tunes gag.  “Hey I’m just gonna walk behind you and not do anything suspicious.  Keep looking over there!”

Did any of the writers actually believe the audience was invested in Wesley?  For that matter, WERE any of the audience invested in him?  I genuinely don’t blame Wil Wheaton, but GOD the writing for his character is uncomfortably bad.

[good-wine-and-cheese]

Making my case for Dr Tenma as Dr Soong in a Star Trek AU

[faline-cat444]

Whatever TV era this is if it's a decade definer or "classics" as a whole

[juliansubatoigarak]

really scared about how Picard may have affected the future of any Star Trek content b/c like holy shit. what a fucking trainwreck of a show. and they already cancelled Discovery. Strange new worlds you’re my only hope 🙏🏻

[croc-odette]

picard literally tells wesley, who is like 14 years old, to shut up in season one of tng.......... everyone on that show had some BAD looks and then by the end of it i was like jean-luc my good friend jean-luc

[bumblingbabooshka]

Illogical Musings From 'Pathways'

[whimseysthrone]

Star Trek: Prodigy, season one

This is for season two, but you get the idea. As someone who grew up on Star Trek: The Next Generation, Star Trek: Prodigy didn’t quite feel like a Star Trek show until episode six. That might be a good thing. As much as I love TNG’s broad focus on an ensemble cast with highly episodic story telling, Prodigy’s early adventure-focused plots with clear continuity from one episode to another gives…

[noratheelk]

New favorite thread

Memes shared by kids who grew up on starships I think they should have sea scout/land scout beef with kids that grew up on Starbases

[bardicious]

On to The Corbomite Maneuver, which sucks cause that baby freaks me out.