#is how sad it makes me that most of the fandom seems to want to ignore tess
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nekoyin · 16 hours ago
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so I saw this at class, did it, thought I posted it, turns out I didnt so TAKE TWO
ty for the tag <3 I'm gonna do my husband of almost a decade now Poe Dameron
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1. Was there any specific point / any specific moment that suddenly made them your Blorbo, or did you slowly grow to love them more and more until they became a Blorbo to you? lowkey fell in love with that pretty ass face from the start THEN HE OPENED HIS MOUTH AND WAS SASSY??? also love me a man who'd punch a person in power that's hot 
2. What’s the thing you love the most about your Blorbo? uh uh uh yes (if I had to choose, his passion and want to free people from the First Order/the fact he's a revolutionary)
3. What's the thing you dislike the most about your Blorbo? the fact he's not real and kissing me rn :( (and that he risks his life a lot of the time to try and save as people as he can, it's noble, but it worries me ;;;;)
4. If you could talk to your Blorbo, what would you say to them? I love you. I'll always support you no matter what UNLESS YOU GO ONE SOME STUPID SUICIDE MISSION DON'T DIE I'LL CRY :(((
5. What's the one thing the fandom gets wrong about your Blorbo? I think that Poe being a flirt is a thing, but I don't see him being like this fuckboy that lays with people and doesn't care/forgets names afterwards. He seems the type to remember everyone's names, whether or not he is friends with them enough to sleep with them if that makes sense. 
6. Is your Blorbo an introvert or extrovert? Extrovert 
7. Describe your Blorbo in 3 words. pretty, brave, dumb (affectionate)
8. If your Blorbo were real, would you trust them with your life? Yes. Absolutely. He seems the protective type so I am SAFE
9. Do you talk to your family or in-real-life friends about your Blorbo? THEY ARE SO FED UP WITH ME YAPPING ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE HIM LMFAO 
10. Is there any crime, any wrongdoing your Blorbo could commit that would make you stop loving them and remove them from your hyperfixation entirely? Nah bro i lowkey like my men a lil insane so
11. Do you like seeing your Blorbo suffer? Mixed. Cuz I like angst, but I need a happy ending. 
12. Do you ship your Blorbo with any character? ME DUH (and kinda Finn but I relate to Finn a lot so what that say bout us)
13. If your Blorbo is from a live-action media, are you also a fan of the actor who plays them?  YAH he was my introduction to Oscar Isaac
14. Would you still love your Blorbo if they were real? YOU DO NOT UNDERSTAND. HOW BAD. I AM TRYING TO GET A REAL LIFE POE DAMERON TO DATE. PLEASE UNIVERSE ONE CHANCE ONE-
15. Is your Blorbo a victim of badly written script / bad plot / character assassination in the hands of canon? Yes imo and it makes me so so sad :(
16. If you could change one canonical thing about your Blorbo, what would it be? I think I'd change the fact that he tried to get back with Zorii, I don't mind her existence, but she was literally abusive POE BABY WHY ARE YOU ASKING TO KISS HER YOU SHOULD BE KISSING ME :(((
17. When you first discovered your Blorbo, did you realize from that moment that they would become your Blorbo? Oh I was torn between him and Kylo initially, but I knew I'd like Poe more for longer… didn't really expect this long though HAHAHA
18. Do you gatekeep your Blorbo? / would you want more people to know about your Blorbo? I TRY TO BUT HE'S TOO POPULAR :( People are like “oh I'm his biggest fan/spouse” and I'm like GET OUT YOU JUST JOINED THIS FANDOM IVE BEEN HERE SINCE DAY ONEEEEE /hj
19. Has a fanfic about your Blorbo ever made you cry? Thinking about him can make me cry. I'm trying to write a fic rn that the PREMISE made me cry (I’m sensitive)
20. Do you think this character will still be your Blorbo three years from now? I'VE BEEN HERE ALMOST TEN YEARS BABY IT AIN'T EVER STOPPING
uhh idk who to tag but @latenightbrawler pookie look at the thoughts about my husband
20 Questions
BLORBO ASKS GAME
reblog if you’d like people to send you asks about your Blorbo
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was there any specific point / any specific moment that suddenly made them your Blorbo, or did you slowly grow to love them more and more until they became a Blorbo to you?
It was immediate. Watching Steven flounder then discovering the tragedy that is Marc. I started on the show, then began collecting the comics.
what’s the thing you love the most about your Blorbo?
I loved the representation of DID, autism and childhood trauma.
what’s the thing you dislike the most about your Blorbo?
We barely got any Jake in the show, and he’s such a fantastic character in the comics. Comic Jake is the only way I can imagine him. Moustache and all.
if you could talk to your Blorbo, what would you say to them?
Not a thing. He’d get a damn hug.
what’s the one thing the fandom gets wrong about your Blorbo?
I think every adaptation is unique to that person and they’re wonderful for sharing. I’m a hoe for every crumb I’m not even sorry.
is your Blorbo an introvert or extrovert?
Depends who’s fronting. Steven’s an ambivert: extroverted to avoid the feeling of loneliness, introverted in his hobbies and day-to-day. Marc’s a huge introvert and doesn’t like many people, how Frenchie puts up with him I don’t know. Jake is a natural extrovert, it comes easy to him to find a friend in anyone.
describe your Blorbo in 3 words
Damaged hot mess
if your Blorbo were real, would you trust them with your life?
Most likely… kinda. Squinting real hard at you, Khonshu.
do you talk to your family or in-real-life friends about your Blorbo?
My partner can’t get away from my obsession. My brother brought me the same MK action figure Marc's holding in the asylum. It was really unexpected and touching. They let me drag them all over the city stopping in as many comic stores as I could visit.
is there any crime, any wrongdoing your Blorbo could commit that would make you stop loving them and remove them from your hyperfixation entirely?
Mean to animals would make me very sad.
do you like seeing your Blorbo suffer?
Every damn day of the week.
do you ship your Blorbo with any character?
I ship him with anyone and everyone, it’s such a problem. I love all ships in all shapes and sizes. All the new ships coming out of Marvel Rivals has sustained me well lately.
if your Blorbo is from a live-action media, are you also a fan of the actor who plays them?
Oscar Isaac is one of the best humans alive. I love his face, his personality—everything. He made it easy to love the characters he plays.
would you still love your Blorbo if they were real?
Probably. I’d always be rooting for him that’s for sure.
is your Blorbo a victim of badly written script / bad plot / character assassination in the hands of canon?
Kind of. How they handled Jake suucked.
if you could change one canonical thing about your Blorbo, what would it be?
Make comics Jake canon!
when you first discovered your Blorbo, did you realize from that moment that they would become your Blorbo?
I didn’t expect to go down as bad as I did. It wasn’t until I started writing him in 1x1 & group roleplays was where I truly fell down the hole.
do you gatekeep your Blorbo? / would you want more people to know about your Blorbo?
No gatekeeping allowed in this house! I am thrilled anytime more people discover MK by any means. It’s so much fun seeing new people arrive and interact with the fandom.
has a fanfic about your Blorbo ever made you cry?
Not a fanfic, but episode 5 made me ball. Hit close to home. I’m not one to cry easily so have yet to find a fanfic that will.
do you think this character will still be your Blorbo three years from now on?
Probably, I still have a lot more to write and explore.
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Questions posted below empty for easy copy paste:
was there any specific point / any specific moment that suddenly made them your Blorbo, or did you slowly grow to love them more and more until they became a Blorbo to you?
what’s the thing you love the most about your Blorbo?
what’s the thing you dislike the most about your Blorbo?
if you could talk to your Blorbo, what would you say to them?
what’s the one thing the fandom gets wrong about your Blorbo?
is your Blorbo an introvert or extrovert?
describe your Blorbo in 3 words
if your Blorbo were real, would you trust them with your life?
do you talk to your family or in-real-life friends about your Blorbo?
is there any crime, any wrongdoing your Blorbo could commit that would make you stop loving them and remove them from your hyperfixation entirely?
do you like seeing your Blorbo suffer?
do you ship your Blorbo with any character?
if your Blorbo is from a live-action media, are you also a fan of the actor who plays them?
would you still love your Blorbo if they were real?
is your Blorbo a victim of badly written script / bad plot / character assassination in the hands of canon?
if you could change one canonical thing about your Blorbo, what would it be?
when you first discovered your Blorbo, did you realize from that moment that they would become your Blorbo?
do you gatekeep your Blorbo? / would you want more people to know about your Blorbo?
has a fanfic about your Blorbo ever made you cry?
do you think this character will still be your Blorbo three years from now on?
Inspired by the wonderful @psycheetamore Hitting a few others I'd love to see do this! @mystra-midnight @my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction @faretheeoscar @moonbeammist @therapardalis @weheartchrisevans @silvermoon343
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pettson · 1 year ago
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i could make a comment on how tess being overlooked in the tlou fandom is because of the misogynistic views on older women we have in this society where any woman over 35 is not considered sexy anymore and therefore loses her worth, but do i want to
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hermitcraftx · 5 months ago
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just got a dm abt one of my posts and y'all please don't try and show the hermits (or any minecraft youtuber or content creator for that matter) my posts, i'm uncomfortable with it and don't want any of my posts shown to a cc. if they stumble upon it naturally that's unfortunate but i can live with it since i do maintag a lot (something i REALLY need to stop doing tbh i already know i need to make a tagging system just for my blog that wont clog results) but going out of ur way to show a cc is entirely different and something i am not comfortable with.
no hate to the person at all but even if i wasn't a little silly and weird with it sometimes i wouldn't be comfortable with it, i want my blog to be a purely fandom only space with none of the creators involved <3 please respect this
#which is imo how a fandom space should be#i'm old fashioned and it breaks the fandom etiquette rules i stand by#i ship and stuff and absolutely NO cc needs to be subjected to that please and thank you even if it's a non-ship post#not saying hermits and others cant hang out and interact if they wish hell no but like....#if you as any person with a following willingly go into a fandom space you have to expect to see some things you find weird#doesn't even necessarily mean ship just stuff the cc finds weird :v idk im not phrasing this right but like#the rule with shipping around any sort of media has been to keep it away and not show the creators anything !!! and thats fallen out#of practice the past few years with ppl getting more and more comfortable demanding boundaries and personal info from creators#which isn't right imo bc its like you're trying to see how much you can get away with. u want a guide on how to interact and social skills#which is... huh??? just be polite and keep anything weird away from them like what we were doing#some folks nowadays need “permission” to ship stuff even from SHOWS and shit with no real people and its like wow... huh....#u need it to be canon?? u need everything told to u by the show?? wheres the imagination. the spirit.#the making of everything so far removed from what it once was#like that guy that played nick from heartstopper that had to be outed to play a gay guy. like#idk im so sick of the boundary fandom ppl in mcyt 'what if they saw and made it uncomfortable!! im going to show them!!!!'#you are making them MUCH more uncomfortable than i am by GOING INTO THEIR FACE AND DEMANDING THEY LOOK AT IT!!#AND DEMANDING BOUNDARIES N SHIT... CRAZY.... idk the hermits especially its weird to me bc clearly they understand fandom etiquette#and the dynamic im talking about. most of them understand that by going into fandom spaces they will see things they dont like#which is why a lot of them only like fanart and answer questions asked by fans. even on tumblr !!! where the weird ppl are!!!#they also all seem to understand they are playing characters (citing joel cleo and grian as examples) for their audiences#which is. smth the audience itself doesnt understand most of the time anymore. oh my god they all died in real life in hermitcraft season 8#idk hermitblr used to be a lot more okay with hermitshipping n then a bunch of ppl from other fandoms moved in and its all more negative#and makes me sad. idk...#i never meant for this blog to gain almost 500 followers i just wanted to make silly little ship posts and now im scared to#bc ive gotten hate and its.... bwugh.... tempted to remake blogs and make one thats very clearly just for me and a few weirdos#whatever i went off on a tangent in the tags as usual just pls dont show creators my posts even non-ship ones for this reason#jamies bad posts#talking in tags#serious posts#<- ig??? idk
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eddiemunsonsmum · 5 months ago
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Just saw this comment on a story posted a month ago.
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*cries in Eddie Munson Solo Series no one wanted to read, interact with or request for*
No shade to the person that commented this on their own fic if you recognize it. It's not their fault. I'm not mad at them. More crying in the tags.
#and no I didn't tag the solo series like I normally would because it's not about THAT. It's not about trying to get people to read it#It was just really ouchie to see the same concept I wrote 2 years ago get triple the notes in ONE MONTH.#and double the notes of my solo series masterlist in general in one month vs 2 years of my stories sitting there rotting#Then I see people saying they need more solo Eddie and I'm just here like my dudes I begged for requests. BEGGED. But bc I wasn't#/have never been a popular writer people don't want it from ME. It's like omg we want THIS but not like that. Not from you.#Can't help but let it get you down when nothing has changed in 2 years. It's not like I worked my way up and have the interaction now#that every other blog I used to commiserate with back in the day is getting currently. Fandom isn't a competition but it's not fair either#and I really struggle with that a lot of the time#Also yes I will concede I should be happy with the notes on the solo series because they are the highest of all the work on my page but#they're still nothing compared to what some people have just hours after posting a new story.#I saw someone complaining the other day that there are less new stories in the fandom than ever 1. That's simply not true. 2. Even if it wa#can you blame writers for giving up when readers are checking the same popular blogs over again or reading the same 5 tropes the same#2 pairings over and over. The same series? Over and over. Ignoring everything else and then complaining that their faves don't post enough?#That the popular writer with the incredible series (that rightfully deserves interaction) hasn't posted a new dad!eddie or rockstar!eddie#drabble in ages meanwhile there are writes out there pouring their souls into dad!eddie and no one reads it. There is so much rockstar Eddi#smut out there that it could sustain a brand new reader for an entire year before they needed a new fic#Idk man. I'm just feeling so defeated. I write for fun now. But there was a point in time where I desperately tried to build a platform by#offering requests and writing a lot of things I would not otherwise write to try and gain traction on my page and every time I see another#food fucking fic get hundreds of notes I get so sad that I wrote that stupid Melon fic because I had people in my life that told me#they would be excited to read it and for what? One of them still talks to me. The others moved on so fast. Most didn't even reblog it.#Some of them have since written their own food fucking fics that got triple the notes of my OG. Again. No shade to them. I don't own the#concept. It's just disheartening and fucking sad above all else. How hard I tried to get people to LIKE me and my stories. 😂#Just sad hours in general tonight my guys. Going to go and pour the bad feelings into Aftermath and then maybe make a bad life choice and#pour all my savings into an ipad#YES I KNOW first world problems. I know. That's why I try not to talk about it bc it seems so petty considering the state of the world#But you can't help what gets you down#EMMs Journal#EMM's Journal
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icewindandboringhorror · 9 days ago
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I'm so heavily anti-advertising that all pitches sound goofy silly to me/I can never take them seriously, so I have no idea how I'll manage to to advertise my game even if I do finally finish it soon-ish lol...
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#Especially how so much modern media advertising is like... getting people excited about random tropes and stuff like#''Do you love enemies to lovers? Do you love sad stories that make you do a heckin CRY? Do you love big stupid dumbo muffin cake#sinnamon roll babies who are too good for this world? Have you ever wanted to read a blah blach blah" whatever stuff and it's like#... i cannot type that... I couldnt do it.. I couldn't even think of how to do it ghbjhbjh#I am such a literal person... Like I love when an advertisement is just like 'This product works well. Look at it. Buy it if you want. Ok'#You know what makes me want to read a book or watch a show or play a game? Reading a detailed plot synopsis or the full wiki page#for it and then deciding 'yeah I wouldnt mind sitting through seeing the events I just read about happen in more detail' lol#OR aesthetics. since I do often watch things JUST for the set/costume design. Sometimes I will watch stuff literally#just because I saw a picture of a costume in it that looked really cool and I want to sketch costume looks whilst watching#But aside from appearance like... little bullet point break downs of things that are in a story just ... do not do anything to me at all.#And i just hate 'selling' things to begin with. I don't want to have to convince people to like something.. they should just... like it...#LOL.. like.. just be born liking it. just like it automatically please. Dont make me beg to you like a weird little freak. So many commerci#als seem weirdly desperate and manipulative. Like those Truck/Car commercials that will have like a freaking dog crying and#a war vet in a wheelchair with the american flag in the background and a family hugging around a christmas tree or some shint and its#just like oh my GODDD... shut UPP.. you could literally not be MORE blantant about just trying to prey on peoples emotions to build#some sort of fabricated positive association with your product/brand.. begone.. Or brands having their own twitters where they post#~~relatable content~~ as a means of shallow audience endearment GGGRR..... ANYWAY.. hhrgh...................#Maybe that's something I can ask playtesters I guess like.. I feel like I don't know my own audience very well because I am not#much of a media person?? ironically.. Like I do enjoy MAKING media. But I've never been in a fandom. I've never read fanfiction. I've never#spent much time in those spaces. I've just never really had the inclination and don't personally derive much joy out of stuff like that#(since I'm already so focused on my OWN world and projects its like.. hard for me to even find the time and mental energy to expend on#others). Even when I finish a movie or game and really like it.. I just kind of like...move on? and don't really dwell on it much? At most#I will get into the worldbuilding of a piece of media and read the wiki for a while or watch Lore info or critical analysis videos. But I#never really care for or attach to the characters or the plot itself very much. So I feel like.. the way my brain works. I'm just not as#good at approaching things from that angle? Kind of like how if you're a lifelong vegetarian whos never eaten meat - you might#struggle to write an ad for fancy brand of steaks bc you'd be like... idk what meat eaters are even looking for? whats the selling point??#Which I'm not saying that I wouldn't play my own game. i AM definitely the audience for it. But it's more like.. I would play it for my own#very niche specific reasons that I think are different from what MOST people might want to play it for. So I need to somehow#tap into the minds of the Majority who play things for Normal Reasons than pure lore collection or whatever lol.
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rexxdjarin · 5 days ago
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saying this here bc it’s the only safe place to say it
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zolo-san · 2 months ago
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I know I just rambled in the tag, but if you took the time to read all that, might I direct you to this post & my ramblings there as well~
Something about Zoro being one of the most misunderstood and mischaracterized characters in One Piece is funny (not haha funny, funny sad) to me because?? That’s literally how his introduction starts?? With people misunderstanding him and thinking he’s some big, monstrous demon who kills with cause and cannot be trusted or tamed.
Meanwhile the actual Zoro is a driven guy who is often both literally and figuratively directionless in life and found his goals in life through good people (first Kuina and then Luffy). He's tied up in the Marine base not due to those actual crimes he commuted (well not inherently anyway) but because he ‘disrespected’ a Captain's son and stood up for a little girl. He accepts the challenge they present to him and because Zoro himself is a guy that puts his money where his mouth is he assumes the Marines will uphold their end of the deal and let him go (note the actual shock when Koby tells him the truth)
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He joins Luffy's crew but also outright says he’s not gonna let his goal take second place to Luffy or anyone else's for that matter, he bears the weight of two people's dreams, his heart isn’t going to be swayed by some pirate.
Speaking of Kuina, her impact and influence on Zoro's life isn’t talked about enough for my liking. She was Zoro's first friend, his first rival, his first goal. He looked up to her so much and his reaction to her passing cracks my heart in half every time because you can seem him just..go numb. Kuina, dead? Kuina, the strongest person he knows, gone? Kuina, who swore to him just yesterday they’d race to the top of the world together, doesn’t exist anymore. His blank face only cracking within the privacy of his sensei before he begs. He begs on his knees, tears streaming down his face please please please let me take Kuina's sword with me. Let me take our dream to a high neither of us could imagine. I won’t let her name die here.
On top of gaining the Wado Ichimonji that day Zoro also gained…fear. Not of death, well at the very least not his own, he gained his fear of not being enough. Kuina kicked his ass every way a person could and still died, what could someone like him do? So he trains…and trains…and trains some more. Overly, obsessively, constantly telling himself he’s not enough, he’s weak, he can’t protect anyone like this and everyone's death would be on him.
As for Zoro being cold and stoic that’s just…not completely true? He’s not stone, he can be excited or sad or angry just as much as most characters he just sucks at showing it canonically (Kuina thinks he hates her before their final fight after all). Sure he’s not as forthcoming about it as some of the other Strawhats but Zoro's more of an action guy anyway, he'll show his love with his protection and unwavering faith.
In conclusion, Zoro is a ridiculously stubborn, incredibly loyal, mildly emotionally constipated, do what you say/say what you mean kinda guy.
(Also that whole ‘Zoro would kill the whole crew if Luffy asked him to’ thing? Top ten stupidest things I’ve ever heard from the fandom and that’s saying a lot. He’s loyal not brainless and heartless guys if Luffy asked him to do that, he would never but I digress, Zoro would square the fuck up with him so fast. DPMO.)
#I think there's a lot of misunderstanding of Zoro's character within the One Piece Fandom (partly because let's be honest media literacy is#apparently not a common skill and tumblr do be the website where we piss on the poor lol)#I think there's this dumb fanon version of Zoro where people take memes about him a bit too seriously and start to view/characterize him as#this brainless uncaring stoic/emotionless cold dude who can't think for himself and is like a fucking zombie for Luffy#which I'm just like ?????????? bitch where?????? I know media literacy is hard 🙄but seriously are we even looking at the same source#material???? and the same character?????#I also think some people misunderstand how Zoro expresses his emotions tbh#He's someone who acts more than he speaks so he expresses a lot through action but that doesn't mean he can't or doesn't verbally express#his emotions or his wants and dreams in fact Zoro very clearly verbally expresses his feelings and dreams/goals quite a bit people just#choose to ignore or not acknowledge it because it doesn't fit into their funny fannon version of him#In a lot of ways Zoro just presents himself as a very traditional Japanese man when it comes it his emotions he's not super outward with#how he feels but it's very clear that he feels his emotions very deeply and cares very deeply for ALL of his friends#Zoro is very much a protector and there are many moments where we see him do a say things that make it VERY clear that he also has a clear#personal moral compass#he is a caring and compassionate character who while he /is/ rough and blunt at times is also soft (i'd like to site that one scene that#makes me cry when I think of it in Alabasta where Zoro washes Choppers back in the bath because that is such a soft and caring moment and a#very vulnerable thing to do I just ;-;) but while one of the most important things to Zoro is to protect his friends (which we see him do#over and over again without any instruction from Luffy - and I agree with op that it probably has A LOT to do with Kuina and the fact that#/he/ couldn't do anything to help or protect her and she despite her being the strongest person he knew she still died) Zoro still clearly#wants to and /does/ continue to pursue his dream#idk man I could write a whole essay about Zoro's character and how so many people don't seem to understand him or mischaracterize him which#is really sad because that happens to in in the actual series as well people make a lot of incorrect assumptions about Zoro#I think the in universe misconceptions/wrong assumptions about Zoro are very intentional on Oda's part tho#He wants the assumed view of Zoro as a cold hearted killer and a 'monster of a man' to be constantly contradicted by who Zoro actually is#and how he acts#I also find it so interesting how unbothered Zoro is by this perception of him by others because Zoro is a very self assured character#he knows who he is and while he has some pride it's not so fragile that he can't push it aside to see that he can be better#also op I can go on for a bit about how influential Kuina was to shaping Zoro into the person he is now and I agree that not enough people#talk about that or give their relationship enough credit#I have a whole side tangent about the way Zoro treats/acts towards women (ya know the thing that pisses off Sanji constantly) has A LOT to
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fenrelmercar · 2 months ago
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Woobification of Solas.
This is a fandom critical post. Proceed at your own risk.
Let me start this piece off by saying that this post is not meant to target a specific demographic of the fandom. If you feel targeted, that’s on you. 
In this essay, I want to talk about the infantilization, woobification, or just good plain headcanoning the bad out of Solas. Mostly it comes down to a few of the most regurgitated lines of thinking: he is a spirit of wisdom despite everything he does or has done and he is just confused and perverted from his natural state, Solas is his true self while Fen’Harel or The Dread Wolf are just select masks he wears. The sentiment is so strong that at points it comes down to disregarding or ‘uncanoning’ the entire storyline of The Veilguard because in the minds of individuals that follow this school of thought it does injustice to the character of Solas they have created in their minds. In their minds, it is bad writing to show Solas being a prideful, treacherous liar. 
Because the man, who led rebellion for centuries using dubious means, using creatures he claims to respect as if they are expandable, killing his closest confidant because he dared to oppose him outright somehow is a paragon of virtue that is just bent out of shape by his misguided loyalty. All the atrocities he has committed through thousands of years he had a physical form comes down to him being manipulated and emotionally abused by his former closest friend Mythal and later by grief and anger of losing her. Slapping the label of emotional distress and trauma on a perpetrator of … well, quite literally, war crimes, does make them more palatable, but it does not mean it should be seen as a normal practice. The acts Solas commits during the war with Titans, his rebellion against the Evanuris, and later on in current day Thedas are being construed as desperate actions of a broken man, wisdom twisted from his purpose and left to fend for himself, despite his self-induced isolation. So let me ask you this: how many acts of desperation does it take to realize that they are becoming choices? 
Yes, he was manipulated through their shared emotional bonds by Mythal. Yes, he was coerced to leave his spirit form in favor of a physical body. Then Mythal used his wisdom as a weapon, warping him against his own beliefs, making him participate in the war in ways he did not wish to. Yes, he was pushed by Evanuris’ cruelty to rebel and then lost what he perceived as his only friend to their arrogant ways and later had to live through her death by their hands. He was broken to the point he could not see a way out and doomed the entire way of Elven existence just to win the fight against the cruel and the unjust. Yes, he is a man who lost his people and his version of the world due to his own actions. He is a traumatized, sad, lonely man, who has predetermined himself to the path from which he cannot see a way back. And yet, many of the steps he took along the way cannot be downplayed as acts of a spirit of Wisdom that was bent out of shape by grief and desperation. Destroying the Titans and leaving their children orphaned is seen as an act of devotion and unconditional love towards his manipulator, Mythal. But as the world’s best detective, Jake Peralta has once said: “Cool motive. Still a murder.”
And now we arrive at the most beloved sentiment. Solas is his true self. Fen’Harel is just a mask. Oh, boy.
Everyone says that they hate one-dimensional characters until they are served a multifaceted one on the platter. Then they get to declawing and defanging them, ripping their personality apart into this and that, robbing them of parts of them that make them whole, and when that is not enough, they take on dulling off any edges they might find too abrasive. Assassination of the character is just the beginning; the remains have to be sanitized and scrubbed off any wrongdoing whatsoever, so supporting them doesn’t seem like a moral failing on fandom’s part. 
Cutting Solas and Fen’Harel apart as if they are some conjoined twins, where Fen’Harel is the evil one, is stripping Solas of things that are inherent parts of his character for the sake of feeling more comfortable with his actions. Solas is kind, caring, and wise. Fen’Harel is prideful, scheming, and treacherous. These two sides of him are now separated by their representation in the Inquisition and Veilguard. In Inquisition, he is Solas - a thoughtful mage obsessed with dreams, a soft-spoken man keen on sharing his knowledge. Except for the part where he doesn’t see current Thedosians as real people. Where everyone is tranquil in his eyes and thus, lesser. People, who he is willing to sacrifice to achieve his goals. The thoughtful things he said by the end of the road to the Inquisitor he supposedly cared for:
“I will do what I must, but there is no benefit in allowing harm to come to innocents before it's necessary.”
“I will save the Elven people, even if it means this world must die.”
“As this world burned in the raw chaos, I would have restored the world of my time... the world of the elves.”
And then he mutilated them. Yes, he did it to save their life. But the Inquisitor had no choice in the matter. What if my Inquisitor would have rather died than lost their arm? Doesn’t matter, because our thoughtful, kind apostate knows better. A kind apostate who sacrificed his world to avenge Mythal, but then by the time of the Inquisition killed her all over again. For power, of all things. And then he stripped the dignity of the one who carried what remained of Mythal through ages by depicting her as an elf, proving once again that he does not see current Thedosians, humans, as real. 
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The most egregious crime of Solas’ portrayal in Veilguard seems to be painting him as a liar. Because in the Inquisition he didn’t lie. He just avoided telling the truth. He shaded it in a comfortable tale that no one would question. He spun the narrative. Solas made himself appear as an apostate mage who has gained all his knowledge from the Fade. He crumbled just enough truth without revealing his hand. Or simply said he was lying by omission. Luckily to him, no one would ever ask a random mage if, by chance, they are the infamous Fen’Harel, so he doesn’t need to lie outright. 
And what did he do in Veilguard while not being his true self and wearing that mask of Fen’Harel, that degree of separation from his true, kind self and the trickster god? He spun the narrative. He said just enough truth to be believed. He was deceitful. Solas can be caught saying one outright lie—“I abhor blood magic.” Oh, wait. He can be caught lying exactly one time in Inquisition too—if you confront him about missing court intrigue. So much for a completely different man in Veilguard. 
Fen’Harel as a mask is such a beloved statement that it disregards thousands of years of his life. “I was Solas first. Fen'harel came later, an insult I took as a badge of pride.” A badge of pride Felassan used to flock followers to his side. Badge of pride he wore all through his rebellion. The one he tried to reclaim once meeting Dalish of the current day Thedas. One he used to amass following during the events of Trespasser. How many millennia can a person willingly wear a mask and not have it be a part of who they are?
And then we end up here, where somehow the portrayal of Solas in certain parts of fandom becomes an eerily similar story to that of Portrait of Dorian Grey. We have this beautiful, virtuous man, who’s telling you the most fascinating stories of the Fade, lulling you with his kind voice and beautiful eyes. One who was manipulated, traumatized, desperate, and pushed to act against his good nature. One who would tear down the Veil to restore what was lost and make the world right again. An idealist, working towards his goal. Damned be the sacrifices it requires. Because being hurt in some minds absolves people of guilt. Some agree with his goals and damn his ugly side to the attic. The one who manipulated, one who deceived and killed. One who has the blood of countless lives on his hands. One has to exist for the other to reach that goal. One who is just as much part of his true self as the other. 
Solas is Fen’Harel. Fen’Harel is Solas. One could not exist without the other. And to love someone truly, we must accept the good, the bad, and the ugly. Because to be loved is to be seen fully. Loving a villain is not a moral failing. And yes, he is a villain. Doing something horrible for the sake of something good is still, at the core, doing something horrible. 
Love him because of the awful things he did and in spite of them.
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fl00mie · 9 months ago
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istg it hurts to be an ink lover/fan/enjoyer in the eyes of those outside the fandom
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ink might seem like an op sans for no reason at first impression and i can understand why people think that.. he travels through universes, he's the only character in his world (the one who's known as the most overrated character in the game which makes it even more repellent, i guess), among other reasons
i haven't seen almost any direct hate towards him (referring to canon, the genuine hate i've seen so far has been based on underverse, that although it's quite likely his image has been tarnished by the series, i want to refer more to those who aren't familiar with AUs in general) but, since i returned to this community i notice how he's not referred to as a fan favorite (anymore?), at least in the popular videos i find on youtube and on twitter it's even worse, i've seen them call him overrated multiple times
it's the fact that i manage to empathize a lot with him that makes me feel.. a bit sad maybe? because he's more than just another meaningless sans, his story and personality are really good and the fact that he's a sans is just a preference of his creator, that may have aged poorly but it doesn't take away how good and complex the character still is
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snowyh2o · 10 months ago
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Just a random thought about how Alastor and Vox must’ve been really good friends before everything fell apart. Because Alastor knows how to make a video ad, he knows how to set things up for a movie/video shoot, things that had nothing to do with his medium, that he probably learned how to do because of Vox, because he was willing to try and learn from or for Vox. And Vox literally welcomes Alastor back home when he finds out he’s returned, has literally counted the years Alastor’s been missing when no one else seemed to know, and fashioned his clothing style to match Alastor’s (assuming it’s not just a case of everyone gets a pinstripe suit!), uses the same techniques Alastor taught Charlie about how smiling can be a tool to keep you ahead of the game.
And how it all fell apart and it wasn’t just Vox that was hurt in the process. Because you can’t tell me the man who hates TVs and modern tech due to its association with Vox doesn’t feel anything for what friendship they had and lost. Who snarls at the mere sight of him on a screen (admittedly while also dissing Alastor), who went straight back to his radio tower to diss Vox right back (and absolutely crush him lol), before threatening him against taking action, privately, twice. Alastor’s just better at hiding how much it’s affected him, and doesn’t let the bitterness of what used to be consume his every waking thought.
And maybe that’s the difference between how they view their old relationship and how the fandom seems to view it. Alastor’s upset about it, sure. He’s bitter now about Vox and everything Vox represents because he’s a past friendship that failed, but he’s also moved on with his life. Vox hasn’t. Vox still obsesses over Alastor, in the way he dresses, the way he talks, how he presents himself. It’s all reminiscent of Alastor. And when he finds out Alastor’s returned, the first thing he does is draw attention to how Alastor’s back! Talk in a roundabout way about how much he’s missed him! Has wondered where he’s been? Sends a spy into the hotel to, well, spy on Alastor! And when that doesn’t work, Vox continues to stalk Alastor through his drones instead. (And then gets off on seeing Alastor get beat up.)
Vox very much has not moved on from whatever friendship they’d had before. He hasn’t moved on from Alastor. (Or from his heavily implied obsessive crush).
We don’t know what happened between them, aside that it’s complicated and sad, that they were friends, and now they’re very much not, and that maybe part of the reason why is because Alastor rejected Vox’s request to join his team (upend his entire life to partner with Vox, assuming Alastor always worked solo and what the Vees currently have is what Vox had wanted with Alastor with his request). We can assume maybe part of why they fell apart was because Vox wanted something more from his relationship with Alastor, something Alastor could not and did not want to give him. Or maybe they just grew apart, grew distant. Vox constantly upgrading and changing and keeping up with the newest trends, chasing whatever new Thing that’ll keep him relevant, while Alastor remained set in his ways because he’s not looking for the approval of the masses.
Anyways, all this to say: when I, and I assume most other OneWayBroadcast fans talk about one-sided radiostatic, it is specifically about how Vox has a one-sided romantic/sexual attraction/crush on Alastor, that Alastor does not return, that has now turned into a one-sided obsession over Alastor. Not that their entire friendship was completely one-sided. I think saying that Vox was the only one who was ever invested in their relationship is a rather bad faith interpretation of Alastor’s character, but also does not do their relationship justice at all. It minimizes Vox’s responsibility in the fallout of their friendship, and puts the blame only on Alastor. It takes away all the juicy complexities of Vox’s character, how he’s bad person who’s done and is doing bad things, and paints him as an innocent victim to “Alastor’s manipulation”.
That’s not to say Alastor was completely innocent in the fallout either. But I hear a lot more about how the fandom woobifies Vox in their relationship than I do Alastor.
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rekino2114 · 7 months ago
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Gifting the chainsaw man girls a plushie of themselves
A/n: I'm still on vacation and wanted to do a smaller post while i'm free so i saw this prompt around and thought it was adorable, I'll probably do it with more fandoms let me know if you wanna see it
Makima
Thinks it's amazing and will treasure it forever, she specific keeps it on a shelf in her office (most of her subordinates are very confused to see it just sitting there around the paperwork)
She will 100% give you a plushie of yourself to repay you
Might ask you for a pochita plushie to replace the real one since she doesn't want it anymore.
"Oh, It's adorable darling you're so talented, how about I make you one of yourself to match?"
Power
She is confused at first and asks what power (lol) you used to make a mini her but quickly grows to love it.
It's soft and cuddly just like meowy whenever you're not near her you can bet she'll be cuddling those two things to fall asleep.
Definitely brags about it to denji and aki. Where are their small and fluffy versions of them uh?
"*gasp* is that an idol of the great power? Very well I will accept this. T-thank you"
Himeno
Thinks it's the cutest thing ever and immediately hugs you and peppers you In kisses as thanks
Will always keep it on her shoulder or in view in general hoping that someone asks her about it so she can start ranting about how wonderful her partner is
You have found her multiple times passed out drunk hugging the plushie and mumbling about how much she loves you
"Oh my God! Is that me? Thanks so much it's soooo cute, well not as cute as the original of course~"
Kobeni higashiyama
An incredibly blushy mess whenever you give her the plushie but thinks it's the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for her.
It kinda becomes a comforter for her. Whenever she's more nervous or sad than usual, she hugs the plushie and thinks of you, and it makes her feel at least a bit better
She feels kinda bad about not giving you anything back so she'll probably save the small amount of money she has to buy you a plushie you like.
"O-oh, that's really cute. w-wait, is that m-me? I love it a lot. Thank you so so much"
Quanxi (and her harem)
You immediately got tackled in a hug by 4 of your girlfriends when you showed them plushies of every one of them, quanxi just looked at hers for a while before smiling and joining the group hug
Might genuinely stab someone if they say anything remotely negative about the plushie
She works hard with her girlfriends to make you a plushie of yourself since they thought it wasn't fair that you were the only one in the relationship without one.
"Eh, it really does look like me, you did an amazing job on the girls too, don't worry I'll keep it close at all times"
Asa mitaka
Genuinely can't fathom that you would put effort into making something so cute of her out of everyone and the fact that you gifted her that makes her fall in love with you even more
Always keeps it with her mostly in her bag at school, similarly to kobeni it helps calm her down whenever she's having a bad day, it's a reminder that there is someone willing to love her this much
Yoru once tried to draw the scars on it to make it a plushie of her (just to mess with asa) but thankfully she took control in time
"Wait, seriously? That's....for me? Wow, i- I don't know what to say. Just thank you so much"
Yoru
Acts like she doesn't care that much but actually thinks it's really cute, asa often wakes up finding herself hugging it, courtesy of yoru not being able to sleep without it and taking over during the night.
Definitely brags to asa about it (not realizing it's technically a plushie of both of them)
Might ask you to add some weapons to the plushie to make it more interesting
"Hm? What's that? a plushie? I guess it does kinda resemble me, thanks it is kinda nice"
Fami
She might seem as indifferent as usual but genuinely loves the gesture and thinks it's adorable
She brings it with her whenever she eats (which is most of the time) she even puts a little bib on it, it's really cute to watch
Feels really bad when she gets it dirty (mostly when she's eating) so she'll try cleaning it even if she has no idea how
"I see, so it's a plushie of me. How cute. Thank you, you did a great job"
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sunny-mercya · 1 month ago
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Unwanted Attention
Poly! Billy Loomis & Stu Macher x Male Reader
Fandom -> Scream 1996
Requested by -> @malertop
Masterlist
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You breathed out in relief when the bells rung for lunch break, three hours of math always felt like a death sentence and tedious to listen to they were as well—making your brain feel like mush.
Someone had placed an arm over your shoulder and you don't even need to look who it is, because Stu is the only person who do this whenever you're on your way outside—always finding his way through the crowd to accompany you to the usual spot, where the rest of your little group would meet up for lunch.
Today, as Stu leads you in another direction, it seemed to be a different place though, trying to remember if you had been ever at the fountain at all in your school history of breaks—probably not and you don't care enough to question it.
Topic of today was the death of Casey and her boyfriend, with Stu making a terrible joke about it—but that's Stu being himself—and you shrugging your shoulders, in almost nonchalantly, when Tatum had asked you how you feel about it—and in honesty it's a feeling of zero, because you don't know Casey personally to feel sad about her death, sure it's tragic—deaths are always tragic—but that's all.
Sidney, you know how such things affects her, wanted to disagree with you about this—raised her brow in question though, when the new transfer girl came walking over and sitting down next to you without a greeting.
Lori, you believed her name was, had moved from Santa Ana to Woodsboro and she's already a big talk through school and that's only because she had not only annoyed Heather Westcoast—Cheerleader Captain and a good friend of yours—on the first school day, setting her off in seething resentment, but Lori also had upset the whole Sports teams of Woodboro high in one go.
Even so, with her negative reputation she had gotten—and her high arrogant attitude, which even Heather (who could be quite arrogant herself when wanted) and most popular girls hated—a bit, really just a bit, uncomfortable close to you.
You're fine with specific people, like your closed friends, siblings or boyfriends, sitting so skin touching close to you, but strangers is where you drew a line—where you getting goosebumps of unease.
And Lori sitting so close was not enough, no, she cages your arm with her own—interwoven her fingers with you—pressing her boobs against you and getting even more close than before—starting to talk like a waterfall, long manicured finger sometimes tracing over your face or she touches you on places you definitely don't want to be touched by a girl at all—like your thighs or stomach—but Lori doesn't seemed to care.
While you still tried to tell her off—your voice a bit too soft to be heard over Lori's rambling—there's various perplexities among your friends faces, because how dare the girl to do such pesky gestures when it's widely known that you're in a relationship (although of who your boyfriend is, is still a secret to be discovered) and Lori should be glad that Heather nor Percy (two of four people who are quite protective over you) are here to see this, but Tatum for sure will them later, otherwise Lori is bound to get some nasty bruises and a much more worse reputation.
»Oi, Bimbo! Make some space.« spat Stu, placing himself—oh you could definitely tell that Stu Macher was jealous—between Lori and you, which you were so thankful though, breathing out in relief.
»Excuse me?! I was in the middle of a conversation!« not only did you, but also Sidney and Tatum, cringed at the high screeching sound of Lori's voice and god knows she could reach such vocal heights.
»What conversation? You were the only one talking!« interjects Tatum, red lips going into a scowl and there's a minimal narrow of her eyes.
Bill was glaring as well, having gotten up from his spot and standing now in front of Lori and you, arms crossed.
»That's a conversation isn't it? I'm talking is the whole point of a conversation.« claims Lori, about to grab your hand again—but Stu was quicker, much quicker, draping his arm around your shoulders—just like he had done before—and pulling you close, sticking his tongue out at Lori in triumphing smugness.
»You bother [Name].«
»I do not! He would have told me, wouldn't he?«
»[Name] did asked you to leave him alone, like three times already. So I'm gonna say it again and for once and final, fuck off.« with the way how Billy said it, demand it even, you could tell he's a bit pissed off.
Lori seemed to understand the message, getting up, scoffing—flipping her long hair from her face and behind—she walks away.
~~~•~~~
It's way over midnight when you had fallen asleep during the movie session, laying back to chest against Stu, who holds you close in his arms.
You normally don't fall asleep easily throughout movies, but with what happened today it did have taken some energy out of you, making you unfocused and doing things you shouldn't do—like wanting to shower with your clothes on or drinking a weird mix of Coffee, orange juice and soda or waking up minutes after falling asleep, just to shout about late for school.
»How did it went?« asks Stu, when Billy had come back into the living room—carefully moving you a bit, to sit more upwards.
»I gave the bitch a good scare. She think about bothering [Name] anymore.« it would have been way to obvious to kill Lori right away, but a good scare tactic was just as effective.
Billy takes your sleeping form out of Stu's arms, carrying you upstairs to the bedroom—laying you down in the middle before Billy himself and Stu joined in and caging you in between them.
Maybe if Billy agreed to make their relationship public known, Lori wouldn't have tried to get so damn close to you, but Billy back then didn't wanted that and ever since it's a bit hard for them both not to touch you too much without making it obvious.
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wingsdippedingold · 13 days ago
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I find it very odd when in the SJM fandom people utilize someone’s SA as a character trait or moral quality.
To give some background on what made me want to post this: I saw a tik tok of someone saying “To say that Rhysand is a horrible person and that Aelin would never be his friend after this man was SA’d for 50 years, has multiple woman in his ranks at the top…” To open your defense with that, is just bizarre. This isn’t the person to treat SA as a moral signifier, and it won’t be the last.
I think it really exemplifies how SJM herself treats SA and abuse as a plot device or something to make a character more sympathetic, not really addressing the actual weight of it most of the time. The majority of her main characters have been abused or SA’d at some point, and the majority of her villains are SA’ers or abusers. While this is a very real and horrific situation, she almost never deals with it meaningfully, instead using it just further the plot for the sake of a romance or to give a character a backstory. Describing characters and their likability based off of a traumatic event, as if it could only happen to a specific kind of person, I find, diminishes it and them as a character/person.
Sarah uses enacting or being SAd as a way to signal a character’s morality. As much as SJM and her fans like to pretend that her characters are “morally grey” she has a very clear moral binary.
You can be a horrible person and still have something horrible happen to you. Bad people get SA’d, good people get SA’d, anyone in the middle can get SA’d and abused; it’s a vile crime that anyone can be a victim of, and it has nothing to do with a person’s inherent goodness, and yet SJM pretends like it does. Now more realistically, it also seems to be a side effect of lazy writing and just trying to make readers root for or hate a character without actually doing the legwork. Very few of her prominent characters haven’t been SA’d or physically abused in some way.
I have a lot more to say about this, but it’s a very delicate topic, and I don’t believe I have the knowledge and analysis to talk about it with the proper nuance it needs, so I’ll end it here
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dadvans · 4 months ago
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i am just so sad right now. like going into s8 i didn’t think bucktommy would be endgame, but the way s8 started changed my mind, so to have them be literally so in love for 5 episodes straight just to have them break up in the most abrupt way?? it just feels so last minute which is shocking because in the interviews this was apparently a planned thing but it doesn’t feel like it at all. Like if this was a concern Tommy had why didn’t it come up at all? like little throwaway lines of Tommy making jokes of Buck getting sick of him or wanted to explore other options or whatever. I hope the backlash makes them rethink, and Tommy comes back but for now it doesn’t seem like it. I guess my only hope is that Buddie goes canon, but even then i won’t be able to really enjoy it. I seriously don’t know if i’ll be able to keep watching the show, not solely because they broke up, but because of how they broke up. (srry for the long ask, just needed to vent)
no apologies needed!
at the end of the day, so many of us found joy in their story, their chemistry, the way even up until the final second tommy admitted that what he wanted with buck was something that would inevitably break his heart.
they were good together. tommy fit into so many intimidating parts of buck's life with ease. tommy is (as far as we know) still good friends with buck's best friend! tommy loved him anyway, loved him warts and all, road shotgun to buck's worst fears and weirdest conspiracies.
at the end of the day, we have a few things:
we GOT them. we got to see them together, we got the soft looks, we got the kisses, the foundation of them that is real and canon in a way we could strike like a match against the edge of a box to light them up for real all over again. i don't think "being canon" gives any credence or superiority to a ship, and have shipped people or characters that have never interacted/existed together in a tangible way, simply because it's FUN. that's how i'll always have fun with ships and fandom, BUT! what a wonderful thing to celebrate that we DID have them, that we have this as a foundation for whatever comes next, that there is never a door permanently closed to them finding each other again when it was already real from the start
for a lot of us, this isn't how their story ends. it's insane that so much fic and content was produced for a canon ship like this. so often fandom is chasing down the what-ifs and never-hads. a lot of us invested in bucktommy because they had the compatibility, the fit, the chemistry, the potential. that's novel shit! that doesn't just evaporate because they broke up in canon. it certainly hurts. the kind of hype we were surfing will crash and sink back in the oncoming months, but i know talking to a lot of people tonight that we aren't done with this ship. we aren't ready to say goodbye.
i'm sad. i'm angry. i felt a real sense of queer euphoria whenever i saw them together, even for 30 seconds, teetering on the edge of this new couple joy learning each other into something new and weird and fun that always lingered as a promise on the edge of their interactions. i was so excited for who buck could become with tommy as his home base. shifting that has rocked me in a bad way.
i expect people to inevitably step away from this ship and this fandom, but i'll mention that non-canon ships like arthur/eames or mcshep or social network rpf or short-lived shows from 1996 (hi sentinel) have had long-lived fandoms and left long-lasting impressions in other fandoms that have lasted for over a decade of zero additional content. this is a playground that, just because they've parted ways for now, we don't have to stop playing in.
and i'll be honest: i have several WIPs i'm like, well trash that! after watching the most recent episode. but i also have a dozen new ideas. new ways they could fall in love now or again, new ways they could meet, new ways they could be for each other.
i'll keep creating. i'll keep dreaming. they won't ever not have the spark that they had. the show could end tomorrow but we'll always have an open door to believing and shaping the thousands of ways they can and will find each other again.
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paracosmicka · 2 months ago
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i've contemplated sending u an ask here for like 2 days regarding ur sonadow art and oufhgh i have to say it is so,, so gentle like the intimacy and softness of it all/pos i hardly see artists that explore the intimate cuddly drawings without the sexual coding so finding your art is so nice?? like refreshing nice as an aroace person bc in my perfect world, many little guys are just cat coded and it's so so cool to me to have found ur art out in the wild also for the mpreg stuff youre literally one of the most normal ppl i've seen draw/bring it up lol, i'm aware so many ppl like to meme on it or make it a fetish which tbh is pretty transphobic, so i'm just really glad you steered it away from that direction and displayed it as something normal and gentle given the context of the au/lh
first off thank you this is such a nice message and i love that people also feel the vibes of soft and intimate from my sonadow art that’s my only ever goal whenever i drew them 😭😭
second off FELLOW AROACE PERSON ACQUIRED 🫵‼️like omg you get it i love thinking about ships in a cat coding way if that makes sense but especially sonadow bc they’re animals so i just love thinking about them as little guys i can put in my pocket just like my cat
like idk if this is an aroace thing bc i don’t hear it described in a way that i relate to exactly so this might just be me but basically: i’ve always loved romance and ships in fiction but as i got older i slowly realized that i don’t think i can feel it for myself. which kinda made me sad at first because the idea of having a partner always seemed so nice, that was the main reason i didn’t think i was aroace at first because i thought i had always wanted to be in a relationship. i did some research and looked into different identities on the aroace spectrum, and thought that cupioromantic was probably the most accurate to what i was feeling, but later didn’t feel like it applied to me because i think the “enjoys the idea of being in a relationship” doesn’t fit right? ig?? idk how to describe it other than i like the idea of relationships, but it took me awhile to realize that i didn’t really want to apply myself in one if that makes sense.
most likely there’s a thing or word out there that already exists to describe that and i just haven’t been looking up the right terms, but basically this is just a very very long way of saying that i feel like whenever i get into a ship it sorta..…attaches?? to my very identity or something?? like i know people can be like “this is my OTP i love them forever and think about them literally all the time” and it’s like YES that’s me but also feels like an understatement, like all of my past hyperfixations on ships are literally ingrained into my soul even i’m not that into them anymore. and i know people compare hyperfixations to relationships and tbh that’s probably the most accurate description but again, that feels like an understatement.
okay honestly idk where i’m going with this i think what i’m TRYING to say is that i feel like because i can’t feel romance for myself my appreciation for ships feels so much more…emphasized, and sonadow is like the longest consistent hyperfixation i’ve ever had on a ship and at that point usually when something has been a “hyperfixation” for 2+ plus years i put it on the special interest display case in my brain except that display case has only ever had like hobbies and fandoms themselves, never an actual fictional relationship that i’m obsessed with but here we are. it might be the development of brain has synched up with this specific hyperfixation but sonadow is the first ship that makes me feel genuinely happy to this degree. it doesn’t make me sad to think about them and also go “aw i’m sad because i’ve never felt that way about another person and probably won’t experience that ever” in the exact same way you would go “aw i’m going to be dead someday” when you think about the fact that you’re alive right now and conscious and exist and have a mini existential crisis of the week. like sonadow doesn’t do that to me, i really just love those stupid fucking gay hedgehogs so much they’ve actually changed the entire layout of my brain and all the neurons and shit they’re everything to me.
ANYWAY JESUS CHRIST sorry for the ramble uhhhh lemme know if you or any other aroace people know what the fuck i was trying to say there hope you’re doing well and also happy new year!!!
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shall-we-die · 1 month ago
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{Angst Alphabet}
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↬[Fandom]•⊰ {Love and deepspace}࿐
↬[Warnings]•⊰ {Angst}࿐
☰[Main list]•⊰ ──────┈┈┈┈─╮
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[A]ccident: Would they blame themselves if you died in an accident?
Yes, he’d most likely blame himself if you died in a accident.
He'll think of what he could’ve done to save you, he would constantly think of ways that he could have saved you but just failed to do so.
Sylus will be completely messed up and have a hard time coping with your death, he would go down a really dark path of depression  and self destruction.
Not tears, no words, no smoke or alcohol. But he’ll be ruined.
"So... it feels like this, kitten, huh?... it's how it feels when you lose your beloved one." His face looks indifferent, staring at your picture.
"Sorry... I've made you feel like this last time. It seems it's my turn now."
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[B]reak up: How would they break up with you?
Sylus is reluctant and absolutely hates to break up with you, he doesn’t want to end the relationship, he hates the thought of it.
"Where the hell you're going without me, miss hunter?"
He absolutely feels guilty when breaking up with you, like it physically pains him to do it.
But he'll do it if he found out being with you means he'll hurt you more.
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[C]rying: How would they make you cry?
Sylus will probably argue with you from time to time and that might result in you crying, he might be a bit too sarcastic or say something he doesn’t mean but ends up hurting you. (he’ll feel really guilty when you’re crying because of him.)
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[D]eath: How would they react to your death?
He’d probably be in denial in the beginning, he absolutely refuses to believe that you’re dead, thinking that you would somehow come back like a miracle.
"It's my turn to curse you, right? Then you'll back to me?"
once it fully kicks in that you’re gone and there’s no way for you to come back, he’d probably sink into an absolutely devastating depression and lose all motivation to do anything.
"Don't worry, I'll wait for you. You know how patient I am."
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[E]motion: What is one emotion they would try to hide the most and how would they do it?
Sylus usually tries to hide any kind of vulnerability, like the fact that he’s sad, in emotional pain, or anything like that.
he’ll always try to act tough and indifferent to everything, like the fact that he’s affected by anything?
anyone that sees him would think that he’s emotionless, a monster, scary and cold.
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[F]ight: Do you two ever fight? How big are the fights? What do you fight about? Etc.
Like all couples do, you'll fight too. From small bickering to bigger fights.
the fights could be about anything, little things like being jealously over someone, to bigger things, like you not liking his cruel behavior.
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[G]uilt: What is the biggest thing they feel guilty about?
He mostly feels guilty when he thinks you’re in danger because of him. And the fact that he can’t protect you from everything and that he’s the one that’s potentially putting your life in danger because of his work.
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[H]eartbreak: What would cause them pain in the relationship? How would they deal during a break-up?
Sylus hates it if he found out you were lying about something or if you weren’t being honest with him.
"I'm hurt, miss hunter. Don't you see me that reliable to tell me about this? Hmm?"
"Tell me. I'll listen to your excuses."
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[I]njured: How would they react if you are badly injured?
He'll not show it but will be absolutely terrified at the sight of you being badly injured.
He tries to keep his cool and not show how scared and worried he is when he sees you covered in blood.
He'll try to help you and get you patched up and get you checked out right away, he’d do anything to make sure you’re treated right and taken care of.
"Did you really think you have 9 lives just because I call you 'kitten'?" *hugging you tightly as he checks the wound on your arm.*
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[J]ealousy: What do they do if they are jealous?
Sylus is not a teenager, and won't getting annoyed because ridiculous things, but when someone really dares to flirt with you...
Sylus gets pissed. And when he gets pissed, that person will die that night like they were never born.
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[K]ill: Would they kill for revenge?
Sylus will definitely kill someone if it meant taking revenge for you, especially if they harm you somehow.
he doesn’t really care about anything or anyone else when you’re in danger, he only wants to protect you and will do anything to make sure your safety is prioritized.
Yes, he’d probably have few limits when it comes to harming other people for you and to protect you.
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[L]oss: What is their greatest loss?
One thing Sylus most definitely wouldn’t want to lose is you, he’d probably be absolutely devastated and wouldn’t know what to do if something ever happened to you.
he’d also consider his own sanity and his self control one of the most important things he doesn’t want to lose, because he knows that he might actually go insane without you.
(he’d also be incredibly unhappy if he suddenly lost his position or any of his connections, it’d probably feel crippling to lose any power that he holds.)
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[M]istake: What is the worst mistake they ever made with you?
The biggest mistake he made with you was not telling you about his feelings sooner, he knows that he just make you confused by not telling you how he feels.
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[N]ightmares: How often do they have them? What are they about? How do they deal with it?
Sylus does have nightmares from time to time, especially about failing you in some way or not being able to protect you.
He'll get up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat and will try his best not to wake you up in case you’re asleep.
He won't pant or scream, just sat up in bed... clutches his chest because he feels that his heart might explode at any moment.
After watching your peaceful sleepy face, he finally calm himself down as he hugs you tighter.
"You can't run away, kitten. Not as long as this heart of mine in beating."
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[O]utrage: How and why would they get mad at you?
Sylus doesn’t really get mad at you a lot, he definitely prefers being affectionate and playful with you.
the only time he’d get mad at you is when you do something really reckless or dangerous that could end up putting you in harm.
"You really like to fool around, don't you, miss hunter?"
he might also become annoyed if he thinks that you’re trying to do things alone and refusing to let him help you, he doesn’t really like it.
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[P]ast: What has happened in your relationship that changed the way you saw each other?
You’ve seen the worst side of him in the very first meeting, so you'll not see anything more worse than that.
However, sometimes fear comes back to you. When he reaches his hand towards you and you tremble, taking a step back.
And he'll be annoyed and ashamed because the behaviors he showd to you.
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[Q]uality: Quality? what is their most dangerous/toxic?
Sylus can get pretty toxic or overly possessive during heated arguments, especially when he feels like you’re slipping away from him or losing your feelings for him
(Don't get me wrong, he doesn't suffer from a lack of self-confidence, he simply can't stand you walking away from him. He knows that he will never let you go away anyway, but sometimes he just can't hide his anger and fear.)
Sylus might say stuff that he does’t really mean, things that he’ll end up regretting and apologizing for later.
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[R]ejection: How would they react to you rejecting their confession (or the other way around?)
"What do you mean, kitten?" if you rejected his confession, he’d be caught off guard and probably would just freeze for a couple of seconds.
But he’d probably try to act indifferent and shrug it off, he’d try to look like he doesn’t care and he’s not upset.
"It's fine, kitten."
On the inside, he’d be feeling a mixture of pain and sadness, trying to process the fact that you rejected his confession.
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[S]cars: Battle or self-inflicted?
He has many scars that surely are for battle. And surely he can treat them and they'll be okay. But sometimes... he just wants you to treat his scars, so after that, he won't let his scars get healed.
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[T]rust: Have they ever broken your trust?
Sylus feels guilty about not being completely honest, especially if you find out about his secrets from someone else or if he ever gets caught doing something shady.
"It was for your own good, miss hunter."
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[U]rge: How badly do they want to see you after you guys separated?
Sylus will miss you like hell, every second that you aren’t together, he’d be miserable.
he’d constantly think about you and probably be really grumpy or annoyed, just sitting around and staring out the window and thinking about you.
he’d probably be counting down the hours and minutes until he can see you again and be with you again.
He hides all these feelings behind a mask of indifference. While he asks Mephisto to stalk you.
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[V]icious: What do they do when they lash out on you?
When he does lash out at you, he definitely feels bad about it after, he’ll probably want to apologize right away or at least try to explain that he didn’t really mean what he said.
he’d probably try to calm down once he’s had a moment to himself, he’ll try to take his mind off the argument.
after he’s calmed down, he’ll probably try to talk to you again and try to resolve whatever disagreement you have or whatever the argument is about.
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[W]eak: What makes them feel weak how do they try to avoid it?
Sylus hates feeling vulnerable or weak, he always wants to appear strong and untouchable. he tries to avoid any kind of situation which might make him appear weak, he never lets anyone to see any of his emotional side unless it’s you.
he tries to always be in control of any kind of situation and be as strong as possible, being seen as weak is probably his biggest trigger and he’d do anything to avoid it.
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[X]-ray: What do they hate and show it most obviously?
He hates when people try to get in his business or ask too many question about him and his work, he can’t stand it when other people poke around in his personal life.
he also loathes when other people take you away from him, like when you pay more attention to other people than to him.
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[Y]earn: What is one thing that they want but can't have?
One thing he really wants is to be able to be completely open and vulnerable with you, to let you see the weaker, emotional side of him.
He wants to be himself completely around you and not have to play the cold and tough part anymore.
He wants to be able to actually talk about his feelings and how much he loves and cares for you, without having to hide under a mask of indifference.
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[Z]ero: What do they do/say in your dying moments?
He’d probably be completely broken, the person who’s normally so cool and calculated just completely breaks down if you’re dying in front of him.
His eyes would probably go wide in pure shock, like he can’t believe it’s really happening. he’d immediately start trying to treat your wounds or at least slow down your death, desperate to keep you alive.
He wouldn’t really be thinking straight, his mind would probably be going a thousand miles an hour as he’s desperately trying to understand what’s happening and what he could do to save you.
Sylus probably be absolutely heartbroken, the reality of you being dying in front of him slowly sinking in while he just hopelessly holds you in his arms.
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