#is how sad it makes me that most of the fandom seems to want to ignore tess

[pettson]

i could make a comment on how tess being overlooked in the tlou fandom is because of the misogynistic views on older women we have in this society where any woman over 35 is not considered sexy anymore and therefore loses her worth, but do i want to

[hermitcraftx]

just got a dm abt one of my posts and y'all please don't try and show the hermits (or any minecraft youtuber or content creator for that matter) my posts, i'm uncomfortable with it and don't want any of my posts shown to a cc. if they stumble upon it naturally that's unfortunate but i can live with it since i do maintag a lot (something i REALLY need to stop doing tbh i already know i need to make a tagging system just for my blog that wont clog results) but going out of ur way to show a cc is entirely different and something i am not comfortable with.

no hate to the person at all but even if i wasn't a little silly and weird with it sometimes i wouldn't be comfortable with it, i want my blog to be a purely fandom only space with none of the creators involved <3 please respect this

[eddiemunsonsmum]

Just saw this comment on a story posted a month ago.

*cries in Eddie Munson Solo Series no one wanted to read, interact with or request for*

No shade to the person that commented this on their own fic if you recognize it. It's not their fault. I'm not mad at them. More crying in the tags.

[charlesemersonwinchesteriii]

for the 'why wouldn't date them'

charles, hawkeye, trapper

and i think you might be into twin peaks? if so, dale cooper and donna hayward

whichever ones you want to do :)

Ahhhhhh omg thank you for all of these I want to do them ALL but let's go backwards.

Donna Hayward

Ok so the thing is I AM into Twin Peaks but it's been a while since I've seen it and I tried to watch The Return but I was too stupit to understand much less enjoy it :( sowwy. So I would be dating my own flawed incomplete interpretation of a person, really. Typical Twin Peaks. 

Anyways I love Donna! I think we have similar personalities and stuff. In all brutal honesty I think if I were in her situation with a friend like Laura I’d have done similar things. Also yeah maybe her actions did lead a man to suicide but that was NOT her fault. I think the only three things that would prevent an attempt at a relationship here are 

1) The obvious. Her taste in men = atrocious. In all the rest of these hypotheticals where the character is already canonically in a relationship or has feelings for another character I’m just like yeah the more the merrier but if Donna insists on inviting her insufferable ass boyfriend into the mix I could NOT fucking do it I’m sorry. 

2) This girl is not ready for a relationship yet after All That god damn. But then again neither am I so maybe that balances out. We would need to spend some time as support group buddies just hugging and crying a lot before even considering a date. 

3) It is unlikely we would ever interact as I am never setting foot in that town ever in my life are you kidding me. Donna is super pretty in both her incarnations but I’m sorry I don’t think any pussy pops severely enough for me to risk going to fucking doorknob hell or some shit.

Dale Cooper

Ignore everything I said in that last paragraph. I change my mind. I forgot my beautiful autism creature husband is here. I would risk it all for a date with Dale Cooper and so would all who know and perceive the truth. AND he’s got two hot girlfriends with him at least one of whom is ALSO an autism creature??? Sign me the FUCK up for this polycule IMMEDIATELY. “Oh but OP what about the horrors” I don’t even fucking care it’s fine. Dale can have little an evil doppelganger. As a treat.

Still there are some problems:

1) Dale is an FBI agent and Harry is a cop. Booooooo!!!! But maybe if Annie and Caroline and I unionize we can force them to quit their jobs. 

2) Unclear if I would be forced to join the Black Lodge Horror Vision Rotation along with Annie and Caroline. Boring and time consuming task and unlike Laura you don’t even get to do a Big Scream.

3) I personally actually don’t like pie or coffee at all :( I’m sorry babygirl I understand if this is a deal breaker. 

Trapper McIntyre 

You know that “golden retriever boyfriend” joke? Trapper is like THE golden retriever boyfriend to me. Which I mean as an absolute compliment! Golden retrievers are friendly, helpful, adorable, lovable dogs. I am always up to pet a golden retriever.

But the thing is, I would never get one myself. They’re just a bit too big, bit too much energy, bit too messy, and anyways I prefer cats. No hate, no judgment, just a series of tiny preferences. Not into jocks, not into casual no-strings-attached type relationships, not super into kids, you know how it is. Boring and petty answer but I just feel like this adorable happy-go-lucky goldie deserves the PERFECT forever home and obviously he’s one of the most popular of all the dogs at the Mashblr shelter so I know he’ll get adopted super fast. So I can turn my attention to the miserable ass overbred old cat in the corner <3

Hawkeye Pierce

Oh, Hawkeye. I just don’t think so. Idk what’s wrong with me but I have to work to see Hawkeye as like. A dateable entity in my mind. He’s our little scrunkly! It’d be weird to date a scrunkly. BUT maybe I’ve just been overexposed to him purely by dint of being in the fandom he’s the main character of, because objectively I DO find Mr. Alda’s portrayal of him in certain scenes to be Attractive (TM), and seeing clips of his charisma and charm and humor and all that good handsome stuff is literally what got me to check out the show in the first place! Man. What happened. Hmm. 

I think one issue is that scenes where he’s explicitly trying to be Romantic and/or Seductive have just never done it for me. Like comparing Hawkeye’s lovey scenes with Kyung Soon to Charles’ with Martine, there’s no contest in how they make me feel. To me, Hawkeye is honestly at his most appealing when he’s radiating Friend Energy, which is why his casual relationships actually work really well IMO; you feel like he’s truly a great pal to the nurses he hooks up with. This is also, I think, one of Piercintyre’s great strengths as a ship, because Hawkeye and Trapper both have amazing Friend Energy and then their natural compatibility makes that bleed seamlessly into sweet romantic vibes. And to be clear I would LOVE to be in a Friends To Lovers relationship too but unfortunately I am cringely obsessed with loveydovey romance in a way I’m not sure Hawkeye is even capable of. Plus there’s also just the fact that I’m a shy waiting til marriage person and I suck at banter and yeah it’s just not working. In conclusion neither Hawkeye nor Trapper should date me they should date each other!! But we knew that :P

THAT CUNT

There are 10000000 reasons not to date Charles. But I will be doing it anyways ^_^ Peace and love on planet earth <3

Anyways I’m not bringing up his Problematicness as a reason here because I didn’t bring it up for anyone else and nobody noticed, so why should it be any different with him. Like no obviously I would not date this dumbfuck racist but I also would not date a guy who thinks it’s a funny prank to make a woman think she’s being sexually assaulted. I also for that matter would not date a guy who works with the dumbfuck racist and is like aw, ya know what, he’s not that bad really :) the second they have a chance to have a bonding moment. I guess I have decided to be a buzzkill about that forever now btw sorry :( oh well 

But ok no real talk I would Not date Charles unless one very specific condition is met, which is that I have whatever magic stardust they sprinkled on his single-episode love interests before they put them in the story that made him be utterly besotted with them, because more than any other character on the show, it seems, the difference between Regular Charles and Charles In Love is so hysterically huge??? Like fuck. My dudes. We’ve done it. We found the one villain who actually does do a complete 180 and starts trying to act right as soon as a girl takes pity on him enough to look at him twice. (Disclaimer: I haven’t seen Ain’t Love Grand yet I’m sorryyyyyyyy) He’s so ~romantic~ and it’s like catnip to me unfortunately. :\ The total opposite of what I said about Hawkeye up there. Offers a girl his stupid little teacup and recites poetry at her. Unbelievable. Did anyone ever think about the fact that maybe I would like to be offered a teacup and recited poetry at. No. You all only think about yourselves.  

Like even though objectively the way he nukes his relationship with Martine was hurtful to both of them, he’s so Tender the whole time it’s insane. She turned him into her pauvre petit miaou miaou overnight. I want that power so fucking bad I NEED that power so fucking bad. Say it with me everyone. I Could Fix Him. (”But OP Martine and Donna DIDN’T fix him he still left them both and never mentioned them again?” Yes but don’t worry they were just loosening the lid on his jar a little bit. I’ll get him open you’ll see. He’s gonna be soooo well trained when I’m done I’ll make him apologize to Maxwell and everything. He won’t even need the shock collar after a few weeks.)

But yeah if I have to like, try to appeal to him on my own it’s not fucking happening. I have no desire to hear the equivalent of a DOS deepfake hologram that has become evil due to being trained on text scraped from youtube comments tell me I’m ugly and stupid, which is exactly what would happen. Up til now I’ve sidestepped the issue that I do not think any of these people would give me the time of day (except Maxwell who would take pity on me probably because he is sososo Good) but I cannot ignore how much Charles just would Not like me. I don’t know how the selfshipper community does it they’re braver than any fucking US marine over there fr. Charles would look at me like I was a gross little bug on the ground and I can’t escape it. Oh well. Who needs him. Where’s your sister you dipshit I’m about to GET IT

[ladykalliope]

Mel and Jayce Deserved Much Better

After experiencing horrors and walking through valleys and shadows, I truly hoped Mel would break down this season and unleash her emotions. Especially since she spent the entire season unlearning hardness with Jayce being so openly affectionate and emotional. This final act was honestly a slap in the face.

The one person she hoped would offer her that safety net to do this completely shuts her down. Mel was always cognizant of his feelings, constantly looking out for him, advising him, and teaching him. She shared with him her deepest insecurities and vulnerabilities. I can understand if Mel and Jayce are both going their separate ways because of the Noxus plot but to have him be this cold, and distant, and show a lack of understanding toward her plight is bizarre.

Mel comes back with a changed appearance and a different demeanor, and he doesn't even ask what happened. He seems to not care. Jayce isn't even giving her a chance to explain herself and just keeps coming at her and you can see the moment when Mel puts all her walls back up. Don't even get me started on the fact that he held the hammer in his hand for most of the time.

Their interactions during this act paint Jayce as one large hypocrite. He benefitted from all of Mel's teachings, from her providing comfort and affection, to her investments in Hextech. Asking her why she didn't save Viktor like she had something against him was wild.

This is the same Mel who offered comfort to Jayce when Viktor was severely injured during the explosion. The same Mel who immediately understood why Jayce left after their night together, recognized the importance of Viktor to Jayce.

If Mel could protect everybody in that room, she would. When she explains her lack of awareness of her abilities to him, he just keeps going on and on.

And the apology with the "passenger" line was just bad. It lacked a certain level of remorse that I would expect from Jayce of all people. Where is that good-hearted man who could tell when people aren't feeling their best, that person who always wanted to help people and make their lives better?

I think the Survivor Jayce is not the Jayce that Mel fell in love with, this is another man. The Jayce she fell in love with died at the bottom of that cave. The survivor Jayce is Viktor's passenger.

Jayce abandoned not just Mel but also his mother who protected him many times to be with Viktor in the afterlife?? In what universe is Jayce pulling that shit?

Now Mel's heading off to Noxus. A nation that doesn't align with her values and morals and would most likely have to harden herself to rule or have influence there. I hate it all. I hate that Black women always have to be strong. We actually had an opportunity to see a Black woman who grew up in that environment slowly shed those walls with a man who actually loved her and was openly affectionate and vulnerable. I'm so sad that it was taken from us. I'm sick and tired of the strong Black woman trope.

With how mischaracterized her motives and actions towards Jayce are, I for one cannot say that I'm excited for a spin-off series with Mel as a main character. Not with this writing team and this fandom.

To me, this show ended in season 1 with Zaun becoming independent, Jinx not firing the rocket, and Mel and Jayce growing together as individuals and as a couple.

[fl00mie]

istg it hurts to be an ink lover/fan/enjoyer in the eyes of those outside the fandom

ink might seem like an op sans for no reason at first impression and i can understand why people think that.. he travels through universes, he's the only character in his world (the one who's known as the most overrated character in the game which makes it even more repellent, i guess), among other reasons

i haven't seen almost any direct hate towards him (referring to canon, the genuine hate i've seen so far has been based on underverse, that although it's quite likely his image has been tarnished by the series, i want to refer more to those who aren't familiar with AUs in general) but, since i returned to this community i notice how he's not referred to as a fan favorite (anymore?), at least in the popular videos i find on youtube and on twitter it's even worse, i've seen them call him overrated multiple times

it's the fact that i manage to empathize a lot with him that makes me feel.. a bit sad maybe? because he's more than just another meaningless sans, his story and personality are really good and the fact that he's a sans is just a preference of his creator, that may have aged poorly but it doesn't take away how good and complex the character still is

[snowyh2o]

Just a random thought about how Alastor and Vox must’ve been really good friends before everything fell apart. Because Alastor knows how to make a video ad, he knows how to set things up for a movie/video shoot, things that had nothing to do with his medium, that he probably learned how to do because of Vox, because he was willing to try and learn from or for Vox. And Vox literally welcomes Alastor back home when he finds out he’s returned, has literally counted the years Alastor’s been missing when no one else seemed to know, and fashioned his clothing style to match Alastor’s (assuming it’s not just a case of everyone gets a pinstripe suit!), uses the same techniques Alastor taught Charlie about how smiling can be a tool to keep you ahead of the game.

And how it all fell apart and it wasn’t just Vox that was hurt in the process. Because you can’t tell me the man who hates TVs and modern tech due to its association with Vox doesn’t feel anything for what friendship they had and lost. Who snarls at the mere sight of him on a screen (admittedly while also dissing Alastor), who went straight back to his radio tower to diss Vox right back (and absolutely crush him lol), before threatening him against taking action, privately, twice. Alastor’s just better at hiding how much it’s affected him, and doesn’t let the bitterness of what used to be consume his every waking thought.

And maybe that’s the difference between how they view their old relationship and how the fandom seems to view it. Alastor’s upset about it, sure. He’s bitter now about Vox and everything Vox represents because he’s a past friendship that failed, but he’s also moved on with his life. Vox hasn’t. Vox still obsesses over Alastor, in the way he dresses, the way he talks, how he presents himself. It’s all reminiscent of Alastor. And when he finds out Alastor’s returned, the first thing he does is draw attention to how Alastor’s back! Talk in a roundabout way about how much he’s missed him! Has wondered where he’s been? Sends a spy into the hotel to, well, spy on Alastor! And when that doesn’t work, Vox continues to stalk Alastor through his drones instead. (And then gets off on seeing Alastor get beat up.)

Vox very much has not moved on from whatever friendship they’d had before. He hasn’t moved on from Alastor. (Or from his heavily implied obsessive crush).

We don’t know what happened between them, aside that it’s complicated and sad, that they were friends, and now they’re very much not, and that maybe part of the reason why is because Alastor rejected Vox’s request to join his team (upend his entire life to partner with Vox, assuming Alastor always worked solo and what the Vees currently have is what Vox had wanted with Alastor with his request). We can assume maybe part of why they fell apart was because Vox wanted something more from his relationship with Alastor, something Alastor could not and did not want to give him. Or maybe they just grew apart, grew distant. Vox constantly upgrading and changing and keeping up with the newest trends, chasing whatever new Thing that’ll keep him relevant, while Alastor remained set in his ways because he’s not looking for the approval of the masses.

Anyways, all this to say: when I, and I assume most other OneWayBroadcast fans talk about one-sided radiostatic, it is specifically about how Vox has a one-sided romantic/sexual attraction/crush on Alastor, that Alastor does not return, that has now turned into a one-sided obsession over Alastor. Not that their entire friendship was completely one-sided. I think saying that Vox was the only one who was ever invested in their relationship is a rather bad faith interpretation of Alastor’s character, but also does not do their relationship justice at all. It minimizes Vox’s responsibility in the fallout of their friendship, and puts the blame only on Alastor. It takes away all the juicy complexities of Vox’s character, how he’s bad person who’s done and is doing bad things, and paints him as an innocent victim to “Alastor’s manipulation”.

That’s not to say Alastor was completely innocent in the fallout either. But I hear a lot more about how the fandom woobifies Vox in their relationship than I do Alastor.

[dadvans]

i am just so sad right now. like going into s8 i didn’t think bucktommy would be endgame, but the way s8 started changed my mind, so to have them be literally so in love for 5 episodes straight just to have them break up in the most abrupt way?? it just feels so last minute which is shocking because in the interviews this was apparently a planned thing but it doesn’t feel like it at all. Like if this was a concern Tommy had why didn’t it come up at all? like little throwaway lines of Tommy making jokes of Buck getting sick of him or wanted to explore other options or whatever. I hope the backlash makes them rethink, and Tommy comes back but for now it doesn’t seem like it. I guess my only hope is that Buddie goes canon, but even then i won’t be able to really enjoy it. I seriously don’t know if i’ll be able to keep watching the show, not solely because they broke up, but because of how they broke up. (srry for the long ask, just needed to vent)

no apologies needed!

at the end of the day, so many of us found joy in their story, their chemistry, the way even up until the final second tommy admitted that what he wanted with buck was something that would inevitably break his heart.

they were good together. tommy fit into so many intimidating parts of buck's life with ease. tommy is (as far as we know) still good friends with buck's best friend! tommy loved him anyway, loved him warts and all, road shotgun to buck's worst fears and weirdest conspiracies.

at the end of the day, we have a few things:

we GOT them. we got to see them together, we got the soft looks, we got the kisses, the foundation of them that is real and canon in a way we could strike like a match against the edge of a box to light them up for real all over again. i don't think "being canon" gives any credence or superiority to a ship, and have shipped people or characters that have never interacted/existed together in a tangible way, simply because it's FUN. that's how i'll always have fun with ships and fandom, BUT! what a wonderful thing to celebrate that we DID have them, that we have this as a foundation for whatever comes next, that there is never a door permanently closed to them finding each other again when it was already real from the start

for a lot of us, this isn't how their story ends. it's insane that so much fic and content was produced for a canon ship like this. so often fandom is chasing down the what-ifs and never-hads. a lot of us invested in bucktommy because they had the compatibility, the fit, the chemistry, the potential. that's novel shit! that doesn't just evaporate because they broke up in canon. it certainly hurts. the kind of hype we were surfing will crash and sink back in the oncoming months, but i know talking to a lot of people tonight that we aren't done with this ship. we aren't ready to say goodbye.

i'm sad. i'm angry. i felt a real sense of queer euphoria whenever i saw them together, even for 30 seconds, teetering on the edge of this new couple joy learning each other into something new and weird and fun that always lingered as a promise on the edge of their interactions. i was so excited for who buck could become with tommy as his home base. shifting that has rocked me in a bad way.

i expect people to inevitably step away from this ship and this fandom, but i'll mention that non-canon ships like arthur/eames or mcshep or social network rpf or short-lived shows from 1996 (hi sentinel) have had long-lived fandoms and left long-lasting impressions in other fandoms that have lasted for over a decade of zero additional content. this is a playground that, just because they've parted ways for now, we don't have to stop playing in.

and i'll be honest: i have several WIPs i'm like, well trash that! after watching the most recent episode. but i also have a dozen new ideas. new ways they could fall in love now or again, new ways they could meet, new ways they could be for each other.

i'll keep creating. i'll keep dreaming. they won't ever not have the spark that they had. the show could end tomorrow but we'll always have an open door to believing and shaping the thousands of ways they can and will find each other again.

[rekino2114]

Gifting the chainsaw man girls a plushie of themselves

A/n: I'm still on vacation and wanted to do a smaller post while i'm free so i saw this prompt around and thought it was adorable, I'll probably do it with more fandoms let me know if you wanna see it

Makima

Thinks it's amazing and will treasure it forever, she specific keeps it on a shelf in her office (most of her subordinates are very confused to see it just sitting there around the paperwork)

She will 100% give you a plushie of yourself to repay you

Might ask you for a pochita plushie to replace the real one since she doesn't want it anymore.

"Oh, It's adorable darling you're so talented, how about I make you one of yourself to match?"

Power

She is confused at first and asks what power (lol) you used to make a mini her but quickly grows to love it.

It's soft and cuddly just like meowy whenever you're not near her you can bet she'll be cuddling those two things to fall asleep.

Definitely brags about it to denji and aki. Where are their small and fluffy versions of them uh?

"*gasp* is that an idol of the great power? Very well I will accept this. T-thank you"

Himeno

Thinks it's the cutest thing ever and immediately hugs you and peppers you In kisses as thanks

Will always keep it on her shoulder or in view in general hoping that someone asks her about it so she can start ranting about how wonderful her partner is

You have found her multiple times passed out drunk hugging the plushie and mumbling about how much she loves you

"Oh my God! Is that me? Thanks so much it's soooo cute, well not as cute as the original of course~"

Kobeni higashiyama

An incredibly blushy mess whenever you give her the plushie but thinks it's the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for her.

It kinda becomes a comforter for her. Whenever she's more nervous or sad than usual, she hugs the plushie and thinks of you, and it makes her feel at least a bit better

She feels kinda bad about not giving you anything back so she'll probably save the small amount of money she has to buy you a plushie you like.

"O-oh, that's really cute. w-wait, is that m-me? I love it a lot. Thank you so so much"

Quanxi (and her harem)

You immediately got tackled in a hug by 4 of your girlfriends when you showed them plushies of every one of them, quanxi just looked at hers for a while before smiling and joining the group hug

Might genuinely stab someone if they say anything remotely negative about the plushie

She works hard with her girlfriends to make you a plushie of yourself since they thought it wasn't fair that you were the only one in the relationship without one.

"Eh, it really does look like me, you did an amazing job on the girls too, don't worry I'll keep it close at all times"

Asa mitaka

Genuinely can't fathom that you would put effort into making something so cute of her out of everyone and the fact that you gifted her that makes her fall in love with you even more

Always keeps it with her mostly in her bag at school, similarly to kobeni it helps calm her down whenever she's having a bad day, it's a reminder that there is someone willing to love her this much

Yoru once tried to draw the scars on it to make it a plushie of her (just to mess with asa) but thankfully she took control in time

"Wait, seriously? That's....for me? Wow, i- I don't know what to say. Just thank you so much"

Yoru

Acts like she doesn't care that much but actually thinks it's really cute, asa often wakes up finding herself hugging it, courtesy of yoru not being able to sleep without it and taking over during the night.

Definitely brags to asa about it (not realizing it's technically a plushie of both of them)

Might ask you to add some weapons to the plushie to make it more interesting

"Hm? What's that? a plushie? I guess it does kinda resemble me, thanks it is kinda nice"

Fami

She might seem as indifferent as usual but genuinely loves the gesture and thinks it's adorable

She brings it with her whenever she eats (which is most of the time) she even puts a little bib on it, it's really cute to watch

Feels really bad when she gets it dirty (mostly when she's eating) so she'll try cleaning it even if she has no idea how

"I see, so it's a plushie of me. How cute. Thank you, you did a great job"

[mrradmccoolman]

something interesting i've been thinking about lately is the fact that watching dead poets society for the first time, i thought todd would be the one to commit suicide. i can't remember whether i knew one of the characters would going in, or only after my teacher mentioned it as a trigger warning right before the scene (i watched it in class my junior year). i say im getting back into the fandom, but really, i wasn't quite in it before this. in truth, the movie affected me so deeply that i actually avoided it because i didn't know how to handle it (this, along with forgetting seemingly insignificant details about emotional experiences- like whether i knew going in that one of the characters would die or not- happens...concerningly often, and im not sure if it's indicative of a larger problem or if i want to know).

needless to say, i did remember recently that i had assumed todd would be the one to die, and i increasingly believe this is actually not an uncommon belief that new viewers have going in. why is this? well, there are a few obvious and not-so-obvious reasons that i want to go over.

for one, todd is probably the main protagonist of the movie. the other poets are certainly main characters too, but for the most part, we follow todd's journey at Welton from beginning to end. it wouldn’t be irrational to assume that such an important event would happen to him solely due to this fact.

more than that, todd is arguably the most obviously struggling out of all the poets to the naked eye. he has all the hallmarks of a person with low self-esteem and a veritable heft of familial, educational, and social problems. he's crippilingly shy, anxious, and always uncomfortable; he has a hard time connecting with his peers, difficulty coming out of his shell, and cowers under the burden of unreachable expectations from parents who can't seem to pay attention to him as anything other than second best compared to their eldest son. though it isn't ever outwardly shown, it isn't hard to imagine he's a victim of bullying and/or harassment- in fact, though i don't believe the poets would ever bully anyone, they clearly sense his "otherness" as shown by Cameron's comment in the beginning of the movie. even neil doesn't understand him at first, and it takes time for him to really grasp how bad things are for todd. i don't believe todd's parents' reasons for pulling him out of Balincrest are every directly specified, but ive always thought a big part of it could be that he was being picked on by the other students (along with his parents hope that transferring him to Welton would make him succeed like his brother).

i don't know if by the time i was watching neil's scene with his parents after the play that i really knew, completely, what was coming. i think by then i knew it wouldnt be todd to die, but i hadn't fully accepted that neil would in his stead. there was a sort of comfort in feeling like i knew what would happen, only for the movie to pull the rug out from beneath me and leave me devastated. not that i would've been less sad if todd had died- just that, when neil did, and i could ruminate on the signs shown through the rest of the movie and the grief and the direness of the situation, i was left reeling at the suddenness.

of course, looking back on it, it makes complete sense that it would be neil. knowing his situation, his history, and his personality, it seemed painfully obvious. but i only really realized that after the fact, like i imagine the poets did as well.

ive already mentioned quite a few times on this blog neil's depression and how things were for him, including his relationship with his father, but that's because i find it especially painful in the way i can relate. i imagine a neil who has been struggling with depression since he was very young, crushed under the weight of a father who had planned out who he was meant to be since his birth. a neil who doesn't understand why he's so damn empty all the time, who doesn't speak up because he fears what it means. a neil who has all these feelings about boys that he shouldn't, that finally come to a head when he connects with todd and he can't ignore them anymore. a neil who loves his father, who wants to make him proud. a neil begging somebody, anybody to listen, but his words fall on deaf ears. he is not an adult. he has no control. there is no one to save him, no one to help him. he is trapped. every light has been snuffed out.

i wouldn't hesitate to say that by now, most people are at least aware of the fact that depression manifests in many different ways, some less obvious than others. on the surface, it's easy to view neil as one of those people- he's smiley, focused, talented; he has a group of friends that love him, things he's passionate about, a family who wants what they believe is best for him. he's the textbook definition of somebody who doesn't seem like they'd have issues with mental health.

but...that's not true. maybe for the teachers who barely talked to him, or the families who met him in passing and told their own sons to strive to be like him, but anyone who'd spent more than an hour talking to him who knew about depression would be able to recognize something wrong. he's somehow both responsible and also completely reckless with no regard to the consequences, as if his own life is a game he can play with. his interactions with his own family are stilted and awkward. he gets angry and lashes out like a trapped animal when questioned; the few times he does open up, he speaks with the desperation of a boy prisoner in his own mind. he connects so deeply to todd because he relates to him, because he feels understood by him. he willfully ignores his future and it's implications because when he finally faces it, he knows it will be too much for him to bear.

and it's this, perhaps, that makes it so incredibly frustrating that everything culminated in his decision to commit suicide- because there were signs, clear as day, over and over and over and over and nobody did anything about it. the only people who really tried, directly, didn't have the power or the knowledge to change anything for him. it was so preventable. the movie leaves you breathless with anger at how different things could have been.

i genuinely want to hear everyone else's thoughts/perceptions on this, because i find it really interesting and part of what makes the film so emotional.

[shall-we-die]

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{"Focus on me Babe."}

What they'll do when they need your affection?

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↬[Fandom]•⊰ {Obey me!}࿐

↬[Warnings]•⊰ {None}࿐

☰[Main list]•⊰ ────┈{0031}┈─╮

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╰┈➤Likes/Reblogs are appreciated࿐

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↬|Lucifer|

When Lucifer needs MC's affection, he would seek out their touch or the warmth of their presence. He might try to get physically closer to them and even initiate physical contact. Lucifer might try to hold their hand, cuddle with them, or even take them in his arms. He might also try to draw emotionally close to them by expressing his feelings through words and gestures. Lucifer might try to connect with MC on a deeper level, revealing his innermost thoughts and feelings.

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↬|Mammon|

If Mammon is in need of some affection from MC, he might try to get their attention by doing something cute or sweet. He might make them a special gift, or ask for a hug and expect to be pampered for a moment. However, if MC is not available to provide some love and attention, Mammon might get a bit sulky or agitated. He might even act out, trying to get MC's attention with negative behaviors. Or, he might go off to sulk on his own until he can't resist the urge to seek comfort from MC again.

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↬|Leviathan|

When Leviathan needs MC's affection, he will reach out and try to qgrab their attention. he might do small acts of affection such as grabbing their hand, kissing their cheek, or even hugging them. he might offer to cook something they like or do something they enjoy together in order to express his love. he doesn't want to seem too needy or clingy, but he will make an effort to be close to MC and spend time with them. he will also make it known that he appreciates their affection and wants more of it.

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↬|Satan|

If Satan needs MC's affection, he will most likely approach them, seeking their attention and showing them how much he loves and cares for them. He might greet them with a warm hug and kiss or even surprise them with small gifts and presents. If MC seems troubled or down, Satan would try to comfort and reassure them, letting them know that he's there for them and that they are loved. He would also try to spend quality time with them, listening to their thoughts and feelings, and maybe even trying to cheer them up with a joke or a sweet gesture.

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↬|Asmodeus|

Asmodeus would often look for MC's affection, always wanting to be close to them. If MC were to be away, Asmo would probably call or text and ask for some attention, always wanting MC to know he's there for them. When MC is not around, Asmo will try to keep himself busy with work or hobbies, but he always thinks of MC and wishes for their company again. Even when apart, Asmo thinks of nice ways to make MC happy, whether it'd be writing them a letter or planning out a surprise for them.

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↬|Beelzebub|

When Beelzebub is feeling lonely or sad and needs MC's affection, he will seek them out. He will look for ways to entice and win over MC and will try to be as charming and adorable as possible. He will be more needy and more loving, and will try to do everything in his power to catch MC's attention. Beelzebub will also try to initiate physical contact with MC, he might give a kiss or a hug or simply lean in and hold MC close.

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↬|Belphegor|

Belphegor will become clingy and needy when they need MC's affection. They will crave physical and emotional intimacy with them, seeking comfort and warmth in their arms. They might become overly affectionate, wanting hugs and kisses and cuddles. They could become jealous when MC pays attention to other people, wanting all of MC's affection for themselves. They could even find themselves pestering and bothering MC in order to be near them, needing to feel their presence.

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↬|Diavolo|

When Diavolo feels like he needs MC's affection, he might seek them out and try to spend as much time with them as possible.  He might also be more clingy when they're together, asking for hugs and kisses, and seeking comfort and reassurance from MC.  He might even do small things for MC that he knows they'll like, such as make their favorite food or buy them a special present, all to show how much he treasures them and appreciates their affection.  He would probably try to do whatever he can to make MC happy and see them smile.

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↬|Barbatos|

When he needs MC's affection, Barbatos would show the side that he normally hides. He'd become more clingy and touchy, wanting to be close to MC and be wrapped in their arms in a warm hug. He'd ask for MC's attention more often, be it in the human world or in the Devildom. When they were apart, he'd often ask for MC's presence, wanting them close by his side and to give him a sense of comfort. No matter what, the demon just wants to be close to MC.

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↬|Simeon|

When Simeon needs MC's affection, he will likely express this in various ways. He might try to seek them out and ask for their attention, or he might do things to get their attention, such as writing them a letter or sending them a text. He might also wait patiently for MC to come to him and give him affection, or he might try to initiate physical contact with them. Overall, Simeon would try to make his need for affection known and would hope that MC responds in a way that makes him feel loved and supported.

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↬|Solomon|

Solomon would likely seek out MC's affection when he is feeling overwhelmed, lonely, or in need of comfort and support. He might approach MC and ask for a hug, a kiss, or some other form of physical affection. He could also express his feelings through words, letting MC know how special and important they are to him, and how much he values spending time with them. Solomon would also likely take it upon himself to shower MC with small gestures of affection, such as making them a cup of tea or offering a reassuring shoulder to lean on.

[m-musings]

HIII

im actually so excited omg i dont wanna sound mean actually the opposite but you write for a couple of pretty dead fandoms and im just so happy to see new writers for them.

can i request hcs for rotg (either jack frost, or bunnymund, or pitch, whoever you like. maybe the three of them??? idk go nuts show nuts) with a grim reaper reader? thanks! :D

Headcanons: Jack Frost, Pitch Black and E. Aster Bunnymund with Grim Reaper! Reader

A/N: anon I'm dying at go nuts show nuts, that's the funniest shit i've read in a while but anyways yeah, all 3 sounds good to me lmao. also, I wasn't sure if you wanted platonic or romantic so i just kept it on the friendly side, i hope that's okay!

NOTICE (7/10/24) : NO LONGER WRITING FOR ROTG

Word Count: 450 Warnings: mentions of death/ dead people

Jack:

Jack is a bit wary around you at first simply due to the nature of your job.

But once he sees just how gentle and kind you are with the souls you reap, he's back on board with getting to know you.

As he gets more comfortable with you, he'll definitely make fun of you like he does with the other guardians but he does it with love!

Jack will occasionally accompany you when you're reaping a younger soul. His presence seems to calm them down if they begin to panic, even if they sometimes can't see him.

If you ever get a break from reaping, he will invite you to participate in one of his famous snow day snowball fights as a way to forget about the sadness that sometimes comes with the responsibility of being a being of death.

He's still the excitable and reckless Jack Frost but when you're around, he's more mellowed out and - forgive the pun- chill to hang out with.

Pitch:

Pitch is intrigued by you from the start.

While he may control people's fears, it is a rare occasion for him to actually interact with one, let alone one as important as the personification of death itself.

He knows just how powerful a reaper can be so he is always sure to treat you with the respect you deserve.

The one time Pitch tried to convince you to join him against the Guardians, it ended with a scythe pointed at his neck and a stern scolding from you, so he doesn't bring that subject up around you anymore.

Pitch actually enjoys spending time with you though, he feels that your presence is much more tranquil and calm than that of the other spirits he knows.

He can be maniacal and full of himself but deep down he has a strange admiration for you and the job you do.

Bunnymund:

Bunny has known you for a long time and has come to highly regard you as an ally.

You two mesh well together, because without the deaths you take watch of, he wouldn't be able to help bring new bouts of life into the world.

He refuses to see any of the souls you may bring around The Warren though, it makes him kind of squeamish.

He will occasionally help you wrangle up a lost soul or two but it's very uncommon for him to be around during the actual reaping.

Bunnymund and you do spend the most time together just because your roles are so interconnected with one another (Guardians of Life and Death and all that).

All in all, You and Bunny are very close knit and have a great respect for one another.

[iadore]

Long post. For anyone having Byler doubt right now let me share a few things I know are true and point out what I believe is the logical conclusion. (Some may disagree) Bear with me. It will all add up and hopefully bring some comfort.

Facts:

Before season 4 David Harbour spoiled that Will had feelings for Mike in an interview.

After season 4 vol 1 Byler exploded on social media. The pairing gained a huge following. Byler won ship of the year. Noah despite having less screen time than his cast mates won the people’s choice award for best male actor. People were so desperate to prove byler endgame they paid for fake scripts which led to the ST writers account agreeing to share scenes people wanted to read. The van scene was in highest demand.

Simultaneously, there is a rise in homophobia in the fandom. We all remember getting bible verses in our ask boxes after posting GIFs of Mike’s soupy face when he looks at Will.

The Duffers shifted from saying they were “tuning out the noise” to taking in fan feedback.

David Harbour was told the ending of stranger things.

A year ago (2023) he said people need to accept Mike is in love with eleven. Once again spoiling an important part of the final season. (Personally this was the moment I gave up on Byler happening and my heart broke. I was so sad about what they turned Mike into and that they used Will’s love to fix a hetero relationship. They never explained mike’s sudden cruelty towards Will. I felt it wasn’t bad writing it was just lazy and somehow that was worse. I stepped back from ST and moved on to other more queer friendly stories. It seems silly since this is just a TV show but I think everyone who ships Byler can attest to how invested you can become in these boys and the remarkably selfless love Will gives to Mike.)

They start filming season 5. Throughout the year we get bts pics. I peeked at these and tried not to get my hopes up again. I told myself the fact there were so many byler pics and so few mileven pics didn’t mean anything. Byler is more popular. Sharing pictures of them will get more attention, so I dismissed this as people seeking clout.

The cast says over and over the Duffers can’t please everyone. I figured this was them trying to let the passionate Byler fandom down easy.

Millie hints her ending in the story is not typical.

Then… the cast reads the final script. They all officially know the ending. Every detail of it.

Noah does his first panel in a long time. In which he says “you could never tell of [mike and Will’s relationship] was something romantic or just a really special friendship.”

Several posts on social media show up as people say they won’t watch the final season because Noah’s words make them think Byler is clearly going to happen.

David Harbour said in a recent interview that the Duffers are in tune with the audience and what they want in terms of pairings. Look above for all of the “subtle” (lol) hints the fans have been giving that Byler should be endgame.

My personal conclusion/opinion/guess:

Mike and Will are going to end up together. It wasn’t the original plan but after seeing the fans point out all of the obvious signs and show their love for the relationship it was the logical choice. Anyone who sees all the “Byler proof” has to admit there are real signs of romance on both sides whether they were intentional or not. Going forward all of the hints we’ve picked up on will have meaning, even if they began as accidents.

David Harbour didn’t know about the byler part of the finale until the final table read. He spoiled things twice before and they didn’t trust him to not do it again. Which was justified because he literally spoiled byler endgame in the last interview I mentioned. Dude can’t keep quiet. I’m sure he has believed he was telling the truth every time.

Most of the cast probably didn’t know until the final table read. If the season is written the way I think will be: we watch Mike over several episodes realize he’s fallen out of love with Eleven and find the courage to admit he loves Will (because man it’s so obvious). The only people who would need to know are Finn, Noah and Millie if Mike and Will don’t officially end up together until the end of the season (doesn’t mean we won’t get a lot of great byler moments in the build up. They seem to be having a lot of one on one time in bts pics.)

Keeping Byler endgame top secret even from the cast makes sense to me because there are people (who I sincerely don’t get why they watch ST) who will refuse to watch the show if the final season is centered on a gay couple. Also, one of the most popular mainstream TV shows on the planet ending this way will be talked about for years and have a huge impact.

Sometimes doing what the fans are begging for isn’t cheap “fan service.” It’s having the common sense and humility listen to thousands of people who love your show and admit Mike’s character was going in the wrong direction.

For fans of Avatar the Last Airbender: creators Brian and Mike originally planned for Toph to be male. Their head writer Aaron Ehasz suggested making her a girl, which they initially resisted. Then they rolled all of the qualities of the tough guy they originally planned into a twelve year old girl. They later had a lot of boys come up to them saying Toph was their favorite character. They said “Sometimes it’s more satisfying to be wrong than to be right.”

Personal take: there’s no reason to be upset at the original plan because they made the right call in the end.

I know it’s important to some people for byler to be the plan all along. And maybe it was, I have no way of knowing. But all I personally need is for them to do right by Will and Mike as characters.

EDIT:

because people were asking here's the link to the recent David Harbour interview: https://www.inverse.com/entertainment/stranger-things-season-5-loose-ends-david-harbour

[five-bi-five-mind]

Beg Me

Fandom: Station 19

Pairing: Maya Bishop x female!reader

Genre: Smut

Words: 4.8k+

Summary: Maya fucked up and let her anger get the best of her. Now you two were broken up and you seemed to be moving on just fine. Only, that’s what you wanted her to think. In reality, Maya was seething with jealousy and you were just pushing her buttons until she finally made things right.

Warnings: jealous!Maya; unhealthy relationship dynamics; possessive!Maya; strap-ons (r receiving); light choking; mutual orgasms; top!Maya, bottom!r; rough sex; name calling; dumbification; breeding kink if you squint; semi-public sex; I probably forgot something…

A/N: as you can see I have a new angry blonde woman to obsess over. Anyways have some shameless smut on this fine Friday afternoon.

Maya wasn’t sad, she wasn’t heartbroken. No, she was pissed. Only a couple months had gone by and you were already seen spending time with some unknown girl. Maya knew all your friends, she didn’t know this one. So, she felt it was a fair assumption to say the intentions between you two were all but platonic.

Maya wasn’t even sure how you and her broke up. It was a screaming match that she started. Unfortunately, she knew that part all too well. Words were said on both sides. Hurtful words; the kind that doesn’t just get forgotten when the fight eventually ends. Except, this fight didn’t really end at all. To be fair, you tried to settle the fight. You had asked for space and wanted to get out of the apartment before either of you said anymore that you’d regret. 

But then when you said you were leaving for the night, Maya said not to bother coming back. She wasn’t done with this fight and the heat of the moment got the better of her. Those words flew from her mouth before she could even process them. No way in hell did she mean them.They were only said as a means to hurt you. To make matters worse though, was the furious look you threw back at her and the simple “fine then” you muttered as you slammed the door. 

And then you actually didn’t come back. Maya thought you understood that it was said in anger. She didn’t think you’d take it so seriously. There was no doubt in her mind that you’d come back a couple weeks later. But a couple weeks turned into a couple months and she was starting to sweat. 

Lucky for you, the relationship was fairly new when it ended. You still had your own apartment and barely anything at Maya’s place. New didn’t mean it wasn’t serious though. Very early into the relationship, Maya blurted out that she loved you in the fit of a jealous rage when she thought someone was coming onto you. That should’ve been the first red flag: you two were fighting even when declaring your love for each other. 

After the night she told you not to come back, you were so utterly offended that you did exactly that. There would need to be a serious apology from Maya before you even thought about taking her back. Since she was the one to start the fight and escalate it the way she did, you decided it was her responsibility to reach out first. Deep down, you knew she didn’t really mean it, but you weren’t going to bet all your money on it until she admitted that she didn’t. 

Maya could be so fucking stubborn. When weeks went by with radio silence from Maya, you were about to give up. The sting of knowing your relationship was over so soon was there, but even bigger was the frustration that Maya so willingly tossed aside something that could’ve been good. Was all your fighting healthy? No, probably not, but it’s kind of how Maya functions. You were starting to learn that quickly and slowly trying to help her unlearn it. But in the typical Maya fashion you were semi-warned about, she pushed until she took it too far. 

When you started to give up, you also started to meet people. Nothing serious, most women you met didn’t make it past one coffee date. But then there was one girl who was… persistent. It was like she was smitten with you after a few text conversations and two casual dates. You didn’t feel the same, unfortunately. Maya was still very much on your mind and you weren’t over her at all. Giving up on your hopes that she would come to her senses was one thing, learning to unlove her was another. 

Though, this girl wasn’t the worst company. You tried to keep it friendly, realizing quickly she was way more into you than you were into her. She agreed to accept that, but you assumed she had the hopes that your mind would change. Honestly, you hoped for that too. 

She was attractive. You couldn’t lie that you thought that. Did you want to touch her? No, not when the only thoughts of being intimate with someone still led your brain to think back to all the times Maya touched you. But, she was still someone you could see yourself being open about it with. If you ever got over Maya, that is. 

This girl wasn’t as attractive as Maya though. She didn’t have the smug smile that you loved so much, or the flexing arm muscles that you fixated on, or the cocky attitude that you couldn’t help but love. All you could do was compare her to Maya. It wasn’t all downsides in your mind, though. She was more patient than Maya, more gentle and kind too. It was a breath of fresh air compared to how possessive and quick to anger Maya could get. 

But still that didn’t stop you from wanting Maya. God, how you wanted her. When you two were together, the way she made love to you made you feel like your entire being belonged to her. You missed that so much. There were times, when you remembered the way she touched you, that your resolve almost broke. 

A few times you went out for drinks with friends, you’d see Maya at the bar too. Joe’s was her go to and you purposely picked it so she’d see you and be reminded of what she was missing. Maya usually avoided eye contact with you then, but when you started going to the bar with just one girl instead of your regular group of friends, that’s when it changed. It was after your dates with her and after you asked to just be friends. When you went to the bar with her, it really wasn’t meant to be a date or even look like one. It was also supposed to be just one time, but then that one time turned into more when you discovered you could get a reaction out of Maya. 

The girl would often stand too close to you. She’d touch your arm and buy you drinks, despite your agreement to remain platonic. That first time, Maya passed you by in the bar and finally met your eyes. The fire you saw inside them nearly made you gasp. She seems furious. Even better, though, was that she also seemed extremely jealous. 

After that, you made it a regular thing to grab drinks with this girl. The more she saw you with one specific person, the angrier she appeared and the more triumphant you felt. Only problem was, seeing her like this was threatening to break your own promise to yourself. 

As fucked up as it sounded, it was turning you on. All you wanted was for her to grab you and fuck you in the bar’s bathroom. But that was a dangerous desire to have, so you tried to ignore it and made another promise with yourself: No being alone with Maya until she seemed willing to apologize. If she did actually act on her jealousy and anger and got you alone, then you’d be losing this battle. Not only did you make the “no alone with Maya” rule, but you also limited your visits to the bar with the other girl eventually. Time was stretching on with no apology, and you were losing hope in Maya. This couldn’t be healthy for you, so you decided this little game needed to end and distance would be a good thing.

What you really didn’t need was to be stuck locked in Station 19 with Maya. Of course, that’s exactly what happened when a snowstorm blew out your apartment’s power and even the backup generators too. You and a handful of your other neighbors, plus others in different apartment complexes with similar situations, were then forced to seek shelter and warmth in Maya’s station. It was the closest, after all. 

You weren’t sure if it was a blessing or a curse that the girl you were definitely not dating but spending regular time with was also stuck there. She at least would serve as a barrier between you and Maya. Or so you hoped.

As time ticked by you were getting more and more frustrated and on edge. Maya’s eyes were always on you from the moment she realized you were trapped in the station with her. There weren't enough places to hide from her either. If you left one room for another room, a few minutes later she’d follow. 

It impressed you how neutral Maya seemed, though. What you didn’t know was Maya was seething on the inside, but she had to stay professional. She was captain after all and there were so many other people around. It would not be a good look for her career if she suddenly blew up at you and your new little girlfriend in the middle of the station. 

But she couldn’t stop thinking about the audacity this girl had in touching you so freely. Your hands, your waist, your arms. She was fawning all over you and it made Maya rage. It would be way easier if she just stopped watching you. She could hide in her office and it would fix everything. 

Except, she wasn’t about to take her eyes off the two of you. What would happen if she wasn’t watching? This girl might sneak off with you and do god knows what. Maya couldn’t have that. She wouldn’t. So, Maya kept watch over the two of you and took a small victory in knowing the way her gaze made you visibly uncomfortable.

Even then, as the hours ticked by, this girl was getting much closer. Maya was seeing red at this point. The thin string that was holding her together was about to snap and she wasn’t sure what she would do when it did. She kept trying to tell herself that professionalism was important, but then that fucking girl was whispering in your ear and Maya could’ve sworn you were blushing and then that thin string in side her just snapped. Maya slammed her hands on the desk next to her and caused everyone around to jump. Your eyes were on her now, eyebrows arched in a way that Maya took as your way to challenge her. It wasn’t, but Maya wasn’t exactly thinking rationally now. 

Maya wanted to yell at the person with you to get her damn hands off your body, but Maya waltzed right up to you and grabbed your arm instead. “I need to talk to you,” she said even though she was already hauling you away from everyone. She didn’t even bother to acknowledge the girl with you. Fuck that, Maya wasn’t going to give a shit about her reaction. 

You may have protested a little bit, but Maya didn’t seem to notice. She just kept dragging you through the station until you came to a door that said “off limits.” It was one of the private rooms Maya often slept in at the station during her long shifts. You’ve been in this room many times before. Often stealing moments in here with Maya when no one else was around. 

When she pulled you into the room, you heard the click of the lock. This really was not good. You two alone in a room together wasn’t going to end well. You had to stay strong. You had to keep yourself from falling into her arms. Not until you heard what you needed to hear.

She was rounding on you with such fury in her eyes that it caused you to take a step back. “What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” Maya’s voice was not at all quiet as she took a step forward. 

You backed up and she still followed as she seethed. “She was all over you,” Maya snapped. “Practically fucking groping you in my station.” 

“Maya—“ you were cut off before you could even go anywhere with that. 

“Don’t even start with excuses.”  Maya took a step forward again as you took another back. “I know we’re broken up, but I thought you’d wait at least a little longer before you started fucking someone else.” 

“I’m not fucking her,” you finally snapped back. “It’s not like that.” 

Maya scoffed at that. She wasn’t buying it for a second. “Well, if you haven’t fucked yet,” Maya took more steps into your space until you were forced to back right up against a wall, “then she certainly intends to soon. Probably tonight even, with how her hands were all over you.” 

“You’re being ridiculous!”

“Am I?” Maya was right in your face now. “What did she whisper in your ear, huh?”

“What? Maya— it wasn’t anything.” God, she was testing your patience. “Plus, it’s not any of your business.”

“It is my fucking business,” Maya hissed.

“It’s only your business if we were together, but you ended that.” You were taking low blows now. “Remember?”

This was really testing Maya too. On the one hand, you were absolutely right. On the other, she was still livid that you came into her station and let someone else have their hands on you. “I thought you would come back!”

“Maya, why would I?” Finally, she at least admitted that part of your suspicion. “You told me not to. If you want me to come back so badly then you are the one who has to fix it.”

Maya just stood there in front of you now. Her eyes showed her angry disbelief and you were about fed up with it. Even if it did turn you on just a little. 

“I’m going back out there,” you sighed in resignation, trying to take a few calming breaths. “She’s probably wondering what’s going on.” You tried to take a step and push past Maya, but a strong hand wrapped around your wrist halted you. 

“I’m sorry,” Maya practically growled. Your eyes went wide at that. That was something you really weren’t expecting to come out of her mouth. Sure, her tone was… aggressive, but you knew that wasn’t ever easy for her to say. “I’m sorry, okay? Is that what you want to hear? I fucked up and I took forever to fix things.” 

Well, that was better than nothing, you thought. Maybe later, when this heated moment was over, you could pry a less hostile apology out of her. 

Maya wasn’t done though, still enraged about the evening and that she was having to swallow her pride. “But you owe me an apology for flaunting this girl in front of me. You owe me an apology for even looking for other people to fuck. I didn’t do that to you, I was waiting. I—“ 

“I told you it wasn’t like that.” You really weren’t hiding your frustration in your tone.

“Oh, sure,” Maya snorted.

“Jesus, Maya, it wasn’t,” you yelled. “How could I fuck someone else? How could I even want to when all I think about is you? Not once could I even stomach the thought of someone else touching me like you do. Do you know how hard it was to lay my eyes on you for even a second and not fall on my knees and beg you to fuck me?”

The look in Maya’s eyes shifted at your rant. You knew that look well, it was one that made you squirm where you stood. With pure hunger replacing the anger that was once in her eyes, her hand moved from your wrist to push hard against your shoulder until you were pressed against the wall again. 

She took another step and was right up against you. Before you could react to your back hitting the wall, Maya grabbed your chin and pulled your face towards her with her grip. 

“Then beg,” She said in a low voice. “Beg me.” 

“Maya, is this really the time—“ 

“I don’t give a fuck,” Maya hissed. “I know you want me to give you what you’ve been missing. I know if I slipped my hand into your panties, you’d be wet. Tell me I’m wrong.” 

She wasn’t wrong. Jealous Maya always had you wet. The way she had a hold of your chin and was a breath away from kissing you had quickly broken your resolve by now too. You gulped as Maya’s eyes shifted to your lips before flicking them back up. 

“I said,” Maya’s thumb traced your lips now, “beg for me.”

“Yes,” you practically whimpered. “Yes, Maya I want you. I want you to touch me. Fuck, I’ve missed it. Please– I don’t care anymore. Just fuck me.”

“That’s the good girl I’ve been missing.” Maya flashed you a devilish grin before she pulled your face even closer and smashed her lips into yours. The way she kissed you instantly made you melt. Her tongue pushed its way into your mouth before you could even begin to part your lips. You met hers with your own, both of you moaning into the kiss. 

Maya’s hands moved to your hair and tugged and pulled as she kissed you with a roughness that you knew would leave your lips a little bruised afterwards. You didn’t care though, not when her tongue was in your mouth and her body was grinding on you and pushing you harder against the wall. 

All too soon, Maya pulled away, moving her hand back to your shoulder where she kept you pressed still. “Making me jealous the way you have…” Maya trailed off as she took a few steps back. “You’re going to need to make it up to me.” 

You huffed, but didn’t protest. It was far too late for you to turn back now. Honestly, you had forgotten all about the fact that someone out there might wonder what you two are doing or why you’re gone. All you were focused on was Maya and the way she was looking at you. 

She craved you. It felt like if she didn’t get what she wanted from you tonight in this very instant, then she’d explode. The possessive part of Maya was also still raging, but not at you now. Just at the idea of someone else touching you, no matter how innocent that touch might seem. 

You were going to make it up to her, that she was sure to follow through with. The question was, how did she want you to do that? All she could think to do right now, was fuck you with everything she’s got. She wanted to see you spread open and falling apart underneath her. She wanted to hear you scream her name as she fucked you in a way that only she could. She wanted to make you cum so hard you’d see stars. 

There was only one way to do that. Lucky for Maya, because of how often you two snuck away to fool around in here, she was still prepared. 

“Strip for me while I get something,” Maya ordered before walking away from you and fishing for something under one of the beds. You gave her a skeptical look for a moment, but still did as you were told. Not yet fully unclothed, you heard Maya pop the buttons open to her uniform. Then as you continued to get undressed, you heard some rustling of clothes, and what you thought sounded like Maya struggling with her belt.

When you heard Maya move to one of the beds, you finally turned around. Your eyes immediately met hers as she sat on the mattress. You started to take her in slowly. She was wearing a tanktop now and you admired the way you could see the muscles of her abdomen through the way it clung to her. You shifted your gaze down after a moment and they fell between her legs. When you registered what exactly you were looking at, your eyes practically bugged out of your skull.

“Maya, why do you have that?” Right between her legs was a rather sizable strap on. Maya just looked at you unphased. 

“I’ve had it hidden in here for awhile,” she shrugged. “We just didn’t get the chance to use it… yet.” The “yet” felt very pointed, like she wanted you to know just how badly you had been missing out on all the things she had planned for you. “Now, come here.”

“But what if someone had found that?”

“Don’t worry about it,” Maya huffed, getting frustrated that you weren’t on her lap yet. “Just get on it.” 

“What if someone finds it after,” you hesitated again. 

“For fuck’s sake!” Maya groaned. “Just shut up and ride my fucking cock.”

As much as Maya’s habit to bark orders at you like you were one of the team pissed you off, you did exactly as you were told. The way she said that made it impossible for you not to. The frustration in her voice and her phrasing definitely made you more wet than you already were. It took you two seconds to reach her with how eager you were for what was to come. When you did, you slowly climbed on top of her until you could angle yourself over her strap. Slowly, your body sunk down onto it.

 As Maya watched it disappear inside your pussy, her breathing quickened and she let out a desperate, drawn out “fuckkkk” before her hands grabbed your hips. With just one roll of her body, you felt the head of her strap hit deep inside you couldn’t stop yourself from falling forward onto her. 

When she asked you to fuck yourself on her, you had every intention to obey, but then you actually took her cock in. Within an instant you were too wrapped up in actually fitting it inside your tight pussy that fucking yourself with it too felt impossible. Plus, Maya was way too impatient to wait for you to even adjust to its size before she started to fuck it up into you. 

She loved the way you bounced with each time she thrust up her hips and pumped her cock into you. It was intoxicating, hearing the moans that fell from your lips and watching your body tense as you took it for her. 

“You’re loving this, aren’t you?” Maya taunted as you finally began to move your hips with hers. “I can tell you missed this. Missed me fucking you like the little slut you are.” 

All you could do was whimper as you moved your body faster on top of Maya. You felt her arms flex around you, pulling you in tighter. Your body was draped over Maya as you rode her and the only thing keeping you sitting up was Maya’s strong embrace. 

“But you’re my little slut,” Maya purred into your ear. “You can deny it all you want, but we both know you’re only ever going to be mine.” 

You were speeding up now, desperately rocking your hips into her as fast as you possibly could. Maya met your desperation with just as much force as she kept fucking up into you. Both of you were panting and Maya felt like she could cum just from watching you rut your hips into her to get off. 

The way you could feel her muscles flex and tense as she practically used all her strength to keep your hips rocking was making your head swim. She was practically just using you as her toy at this point. You had long lost the rhythm you started out with and now she was just making you fuck yourself on top of her with the sheer strength of her hold on you.

You buried your face into her neck because it was all you could do to muffle your moaning. It seemed like it should be impossible, the speed she was setting for you, but she just kept it going. As your body shook and your teeth sunk into the skin of her neck you heard her moan your name before she twisted around and fell forward onto the mattress, taking you with her. 

When your back hit the bed, Maya made quick work to grab both your thighs and hoist them over your shoulders. She was pressing your own knees into your chest, the way she had you bent underneath her. 

“Fuck,” She groaned. “You take it so well, baby.” She was fucking you deeper than you honestly thought you could take. The way you could feel her cock hit the exact spot that made you lose your mind was making it harder and harder for you to stay at a reasonable volume. 

The thought that everyone in the station could possibly hear you right now as Maya continued to fuck you into the matttress crossed your mind in that moment. You tried your best to move your hand to cover your mouth, but the moment you tried, Maya’s hand flew up and grabbed your wrist. Her other hand came up to grab your free one as well. She slammed both your wrists back down onto the mattress, holding them tightly there as she kept rutting into you. 

“Let them hear,” she growled, knowing exactly what your concern was. “Then no one will question who this pussy belongs to.” 

“M— fuck, Maya,” you whined. Your eyes slammed shut and your head fell back. All you could do was lay, pinned to the bed, and let Maya keep pumping her strap into you. 

The sounds you were making were getting louder, but so were Maya’s. She was groaning and grunting on top of you, fucking her hips into you harder with each thrust. Your body was shaking and your fists clenched in Maya’s hold.  

The choice to wear this particular strap was intentional for Maya. It was the one that had the base that hit her clit just right. So with each thrust of her hips into yours and with each time your hips bucked and you tried to fuck yourself on her cock too, she felt it. She felt everything. Now, you were getting close and she could tell, but so was she. The idea of you making her cum while her strap was buried deep inside your pussy was driving her to be a little rougher with you; a little more aggressive. 

“You’re gonna cum when I tell you to,” Maya panted as her own orgasm approached. You didn’t react to that, too cock-drunk on her strap to comprehend much else. Maya didn’t slow, but one hand that had a grip of your wrist moved to your chin and jerked your head up. Her eyes met yours and the look she had in them was fierce. “Do you got that?” 

“M-mhm!” Maya’s hand squeezed your chin and you realized she wanted a real answer. “Yes— god— Yes, when you tell me to.” 

She was satisfied with that, but her hand didn’t let you go. Instead, it slipped down and her fingers wrapped around your throat. There was barely any pressure from her grip onto your neck, just the slightest bit of restriction to your airway. That action alone brought you right to that edge. You didn’t cum yet though; you wanted to be good. 

“Fuck, baby, look at you,” Maya moaned. “Gonna make me cum. Would you like that?” Her pace was becoming erratic as she approached her edge too. “Want me to cum with my strap inside you? Bet you do, you fucking love taking it. Fuck, fuck, fuck— cum now. Cum for me!” 

And when you did Maya did too. The way she moaned out your name as you cried out hers had your whole body trembling. She pumped her hips into you a few more times as her orgasm ran through her body. 

When you had finally come down from your high, she followed soon after. Her body collapsed on top of you and you felt her place soft kisses on your neck. 

“Fuckkkk,” She sighed. “That was something. I bet the whole building heard you cum.” 

“God,” you groaned, burying your head in the pillow. “Don’t say that.” 

“What?” Maya smirked. “Worried that girl might hear?” 

“Shut up,” you playfully shoved at her shoulder. 

“Well, if she didn’t…” Maya leaned up to whisper in your ear, “then maybe she’ll hear it this time.” Maya’s tone might have been teasing, but you knew she was only half joking. Waiting out this snowstorm would take god knows how long, but Maya planned on fucking you for the rest of it. 

And she made good on that plan.

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[herejusttosufferalong]

Pancake anon here.

Whew, where to even start! It has been a week.

At this point, I think I'm just as confused as the rest of you. However, I do have some theories. Take all of this with a massive grain of salt.

I do personally believe N's song posts are about L. I can only see a few reasons she would post these so publicly.

She genuinely just likes the songs and wanted to share

They are a message to someone who she can't communicate with readily

They are a message to the fandom

N has admitted she is chronically online. She is also incredibly smart and calculated about her decisions and what she allows the public to see. Finding songs that are so clearly about love and sex and sharing them "just because she likes them" makes no sense for N. Especially right now after all the speculation from the press tour and backlash L got after the pap walk and beyond. She knows what everyone will read into them and there has already been so much chatter around her love life for her to post songs like this willy-nilly.

If she wanted to share them to communicate with someone it would have to be with someone she can't easily call or text. Yes, she is a millennial and using songs to express your feelings is a core part of this generation. However, see my previous point. She wouldn't do this publicly unless she had a very good reason. And I personally think not having an open line of communication is one of the reasons. But I don't think that person is L. I actually think it's a message to A. More on this in a moment. 

Which brings me to the last point, that the songs could be meant for the fandom. I believe this is also one of the reasons. They were meant to share with the fandom that she is in love. Who is the fandom going to automatically think/hope they are about? Of course L. And these songs are incredibly L/N coded. So if she wanted to let us know she was in love and it wasn't about L, I truly believe she would be more deliberate in how she shared this information so it wasn't misinterpreted. She's also protective over L, and she wouldn't want to send that attention to him if it wasn't meant about him. 

Which brings us to the topic of A and the friend group. It has been eerily quiet from everyone (except T & C) since their return from Italy. T & C seem to be business as usual but everyone else disappeared. It feels a lot like pre Italy when we all thought something was going down. I still think it was. My gut feeling is things were tense with L&A between GQ & Italy but somehow got settled enough for the Italy trip. Upon returning, my guess is things soured again. Not 100% sure I can pinpoint what exactly the issue is, maybe it have to do with DM, but I don't think it really matters. The silence is deafening amidst all the very loud break up rumors and N's social presence this last week. 

Okay, so here is my delulu gut feeling for what is going on. Again, HUGE grain of salt here. I 100% recognize I could be reading everything wrong. 

The Italy trip and pictures being published was a bit of a breaking point for N. Not in a "sad girl moping over not being with L" kind of way. But in a "Fuck this, I'm not waiting. I'm going after my man" kind of way. I think something snapped and she decided she decided she was going all in to let him know she wanted to be with him and also let A (and L's other friends) know that she isn't holding back. Cue the shade of the CW birthday post, the scrabble board, possibly the shirt photo (though I'm unsure my thoughts on that at the moment), and most importantly the songs. 

The first song was such a deliberate choice. A song about a conversation on the telephone from someone you haven't heard from in a while is definitely going to trigger fans to speculate about L. And even if that wasn't her intention, we know she saw it is what everyone's reaction was. But she chose to leave the song up for the full 24 hours. Then 48 hours later, she decided to double down and post another song that has all kinds of messages about knowing someone very well and there not being any pretense. Almost as if she was confirming our suspicions, because what could be more L coded than that? 

The silence from A after all of this was shocking and very telling. N was poking the bear, and the bear was not responding. Even if N did not intend all this about L, the fandom was going crazy, and to remain silent for so long during these situations is not her norm. 

Which brings us to current events and rumors about Cyprus. Is/was L there with A? I honestly don't know and I go back and forth on it. On one hand, the rumors are based on two tweets from accounts that went private. One account is speculated to be from a Balkin country. But I do think A is either there right now or was there recently so it's very possible he was too. In truth, I honestly don't think it matters if he was because, again in my delulu gut feeling, sometime recently N has decided to make it very clear to L that she is in love with him. She decided to stop waiting for him to be passive in his relationship with A and just go for it. And I believe she's letting us and A know that this is happening. I don't think she would so confidently do that if it wasn't moving in the direction she hoped. 

I honestly wonder if, and lean towards the idea, A is in Cyprus without L because things are ending and she's getting some family support and maybe doesn't really have a place to live right now. I know some people also speculate she is there for a job and this could be needed if things are ending, but I haven't seen clear evidence of that yet. However, her post yesterday is showing me that she isn't going to go quietly and she is going to continue playing games and try to rile people up. I think we might be in for a rough few weeks if any of this delulu is correct. 

So that's my 2 cents for what it's worth. I will say, I have also had a roller coaster of emotions this week as many of you have. I go back and forth on a lot of things. But I keep bringing myself back to the last few stops on tour and how obviously in love with each other they were. The way things went in Galway with N's family and the "I will wait for you" song following that stop. And I can't get past the certainty that N is very intentional with what she shares and knowing how fans will interpret it. 

Cheers WH patrons as we approach rough waters ahead. 

💜🥃

[the-scarlet-witch-22]

I want to address this because I don’t really like the direction the Agatha fandom is heading towards and to be honest, I don’t really think I want to be part of it anymore.

I don’t believe in bullying or using slurs to try and make a point. If anything this is just showing how insecure, sad, and empty your own life must be that you feel the need to say something like this to another human being.

I blurred out the word, because I think it’s disgusting to use it towards anyone and I’m not going to be showcasing that on here.

I’m sorry that you are upset about this most recent episode, but despite what you said that does not give you the right to treat anyone this way. It’s a show, it’s not real!! If you don’t like how it’s going just write a fanfiction.

I started using this blog more frequently in 2021 because I genuinely enjoyed Agatha Harkness and her arc in WandaVision, and writing became a very fun outlet for me. Unfortunately, Agatha All Along seems to be changing the fandom into something a lot more toxic and I truthfully don’t know if I want to stay on here or not.

Sapphic representation matters, but if you’re only watching this show for AgathaRio then please do not cry and complain when it focuses on the other characters and relationships, romantic AND platonic, in the show.

And one final note, to use the r slur to question someone’s intelligence is not only INCREDIBLY ableist, it’s also very outdated and very sad.