#is clinically insane

[schpeenor]

i need some idealistic ass AU where dabi is still alive and functional post final war along with what was left of the league except the twist is that he looks like fucking nightmare fuel now.

and for some unknown illogical reason either the 3 manned league managed to break out or they’re just out there. free…

that or it’s modern AU no quirks (heteromorphic traits still exist though) and this is just the result of… something…

LISTEEEEN.. i just NEED more drawings of this man dealing with stupid shenanigans but he looks like this. ESPECIALLY WITH THE EXISTENCE OF THIS ILLUSTRATION, DABI PERCHED ON SPINNER AND POSING LIKE HE ISNT A WHOLE WAD OF BURNT FLESH.

i know i’m genuinely yapping right now.. but like give me spinner staring at this man and not knowing whether he should be turned on, horrified, or both.

[tomathy-inside-of-the-it]

Logan paul posting those year old texts from Tommy and calling them glaze is so funny. That is not tommyinnit glaze, that barely scratches the surface of tommyinnit glaze. If he was obsessed with you he would be pulling up outside ur window like this

U are NOTTTT jschlatt

[neptunezo]

The batkids are known for sharing clothes amongst each other, so imagine everyone’s surprise when Jason won’t let them borrow his hoodie. Upon further inspection they find out it’s Roy’s hoodie. This causes a chain reaction and now Dick won’t let anyone borrow his Wally hoodie, Tim won’t let anyone borrow his Kon hoodie, Damian with Jon’s clothes(which there was no need for because Damian’s clothes never fit anyways), Duke with Izzy’s, Cass with Steph, and so on. After this “civil war” they all reluctantly agree to end this and all clothes (their own or not) is up for grabs. (minus Damian and Jon, of course)

bonus is when their partners steal the batkids clothes only to find out later that it’s definitely not a wayne kids clothing item.

Roy: That’s my sweater?

Wally: Yeah well Kon’s wearing my pants so…

Izzy: I’m probably wearing one of your boxers, it’s for sure not Dukes

Kon: how do you know?

Izzy: Because Duke doesn’t own Minecraft boxers???

Steph: Oh yeah sorry, those are mine

[thorsonoflesbians]

for the monaco gp next year instead of the regular commentators can we have like ten retired drivers on a yacht with copious amounts of alcohol instead? like imagine jenson feeding nico multiple rounds of tequila shots and convincing him to drop brocedes lore so fucking insane it makes lewis' spidey senses tingle live on air. meanwhile, seb is trying to stop kimi from falling off said yacht every five seconds and mahk webbah is trying to either rope everyone into karaoke or is gushing about his adoptive son oscar. david is calling every driver who fucks their car into a wall a cunt and mika is on facetime with his husband and sipping a mai-tai in the hot tub and a least one of them is puking off the side of the boat in the end

[taehyunghobi]

Hobi + Mickey 🧑🏻💞🐶

[heavenbarnes]

@abcdbleh you little beauty 🫶🏼 this is in the “cellular-device-universe” | p1 p2 p3 p4

you had managed an incredible feat, what with bringing your older bf!simon around to the idea of sex over the air waves.

you’d effectively achieved the impossible.

well, something you’d thought impossible given who he was as a person. some guy, simple guy, practical and not remotely interested in anything he doesn’t think worth his time.

that’s the thing- when it comes to you?

everything is worth his time.

you could tell him that you’d booked an all expenses paid couples trip to the fucking moon and he’d have your bags in the car before you’d even finished speaking.

he likes that look on your face when you’re happy.

you’d imagined that getting him to send you videos whilst he stroked his cock would be difficult, but now your hidden folder is bursting at the seams.

you had no idea how easy it’d be to have him send you photos in just his briefs, tattooed arm barely illuminated by low light as his large hand gripped himself through the fabric.

but here you were.

laid back in your bed, awfully roomy without a hulking great simon to take up three quarters of it, your phone was pressed to your ear.

“what y’mean, love?”

the deep, rolling rumble of his voice would probably do it if you tried hard enough. you could have him read the menu from the local chinese takeout and make do. he just had that effect on you.

“i mean- i want you to touch yourself and talk me through it, si”

you could hear the way his breath caught in his throat, a stuttered little exhale and a crackle over the line. he was in the middle of nowhere (far as you were concerned) but he could still find it to keep you satisfied.

simon would never have you settle for less.

the quiet you could hear on his end wasn’t nerves, you knew him well enough to immediately detect- inexperience?

there was very little simon didn’t know how to do in the bedroom but bring any virtual factors (like a cellphone) and he just needed a couple directions.

he needed an order.

“si, i want to get off to your voice, the sound of you touching yourself- i want you to cum and i want to hear about it in excruciating detail”

you could hear how scratchy his military grade blanket was, woollen and likely older than you, being pushed down his body.

no shuffle of clothing, he was already stark naked in his cot. he’d been with rest of the 141 long enough, you just assume they’ve all seen each other in their entireties. sharing rooms, sharing showers.

you can’t think about that kind of thing too long. the implications that come with it.

the sound of simon spitting in his palm drags you out of steam filled visions, kyle asking your boyfriend for help getting his back, johnny watching wide-eyed but waiting for his signal.

anyway- anyways, the sound of his large palm dragging along his cock had you back in the present for good. you could almost picture the way his foreskin would be rolling down the head.

“already s’fuckin hard for you”

“i bet”

a bet that’d make you a billionaire.

you could count on simon for a lot of things but as sure as the sun rises in the east, that man would be hard for you.

you’d say a gentle breeze would do it. he’d say only if you were blowing.

cheek of him.

faint sounds, faint sounds of his hand tugging on himself but you needed more. you needed it fucking filthy and unmistakable across the line that he was doing one thing.

“more spit, si- need to hear it”

and you could, spit mixed with the leaking pre-cum that was running from his head. soon the sound was circling your eardrums as he worked up a steady rhythm.

“been lookin’ at y’little pictures”

deep sigh as he said it, like he was thinking back to you in compromising positions. you could almost see him with his eyes drifting shut, phone between his ear and shoulder whilst both hands preoccupied by his cock and balls.

“can’t hardly wait to get home to you”

as one hand stroked along his length, running his fingers over the head, the other would be cupping his heavy sack as he rolled them both in his palm.

“y’been teasing me, sweet’art”

large feet would be planted on the threadbare mattress, his thighs tensing the more he tugged himself off. you knew he’d be imagining you in his lap, doing all the work for him so he could focus on running his mouth.

“jus’y wait till i get m’hands on you”

your heart was in your throat with every word he said, you’d no doubt he’d stay true to his word. you had visions of him throwing the front door open and telling you to run.

finding you crawling across the bed to duck down the other side but his grip tightening around your ankle before you could get away.

you had to leave that feeling in the pit of your stomach before you got lightheaded but, as usual, simon knew you better.

“what’s goin’ on in that pretty head f’yours? thinkin’ about all the nasty things i’ll do t’you?”

a squeak of a moan slipped out of you, back arching in the bed as simon chuckled down the line. he always knew exactly what he was doing to you.

calculated man, comes with the territory.

“first thing i’m gonna’ do is stuff my cock in’y, got a couple’a loads saved up just f’you”

you couldn’t imagine how, all the filthy videos he’d been sending you. thick load after thick load spilt over his chest, his thighs, the shower drain.

but, then again, you’ve yet to find a thing he wouldn’t do for you.

“gonna’ keep y’in that fuckin’ bed till y’begging f’mercy”

you could hear it on his voice, the strain that was behind it. he was close, closer than ever but you couldn’t stop him once you got him going.

whenever he was on that precipice of bliss, the things that’d come out of his mouth could turn you inside out.

“gonna’ cum f’you, sweet’art- need you to-“

the blood was rushing so hard in your ears you nearly missed his words as they tapered off into broken moans. nearly missed.

“what d’you need, si? tell me, whatever you need it’s yours”

distant filthy sounds of a wet palm sliding along his cock was ever present in the background of the call. a long sigh drifted from his lips as he spoke.

“tell me t’cum, please”

jesus fucking christ.

there’s no coming back from the sound of simon riley begging.

“cum f’me, simon- need to hear you- make a mess f’me, baby”

the sound that left his chest was filthy, a deep groan intertwined with the sounds of cheap mattress springs. breathy stuttered moans broke through, your name a constant on the tip of his tongue.

he sounded desperate, no doubt still stroking himself even as his hips lifted off the cot. he wasn’t about making it easy on himself.

everything he did was for you.

listening as he rode it out, you could hear him still muttering between the other debauched sounds.

“fuckin’ take it, s’fuckin’ good f’me”

anther broken cry of your name only confirmed it. in simon’s eyes, he wasn’t pumping his cum across in his chest, he was pumping you full of it.

he’d gone too long without the feeling of you wrapped tight around him, only knowing the rough drag of his palm. he’d give anything to be in his bed, buried to the fucking hip in you.

simon’s breathing evened out, broad chest rising and falling with a sticky sheen across it. you could even make out the sound of his head hitting the pillow.

“fucking ‘ell, sweet’art- how was that?”

nothing if not an overachiever.

“perfect, si- you did absolutely perfect”

if he was with you he’d been keening into your touch, a soft side of him that only you were allowed to see.

softening further in his afterglow, you wrapped up with praises and promises to be waiting for him soon as he got home.

your entire body felt like it could sink through the mattress as you curled into his side of the bed, letting the scent of him overwhelm every part of you.

eyes shutting on their own, you’d nearly hit sleep when your cellphone buzzed on the bedside table. a little bleary eyed, you reached for it in the darkness.

“si sent a photo”

your heart sped up, teeth digging into your lower lip as you slide the message open. your screen went from light to dark in an instant.

thick thighs spread apart, toned barrel chest, tattooed arm, and a slightly scarred chin in the shot. in this light you could see it, so faint but still there, the streaks of cum dripping down the lines of his stomach.

the grip on your phone was so tight you wouldn’t have been surprised if it had shattered in your hands. in the corner of your screen, those three dots were taunting you.

your phone buzzed, you could almost hear it in his voice.

“could really do w’you here to clean me up, sweet dreams sweet’art”

[portalmonsterrr]

So anyway, I did Alhaitham’s story quest today

[valyrfia]

charles checking in with max on the podium…excuse me sir you’ve just won a grand prix why do you frankly CARE whether your rival is “okay” or not because you didn’t spray champagne together…

[idliketobeatree]

gays be like "this is my comfort character" and it's a guy dragged around Hell on a gigantic spider made of porcelain dolls bleeding and screaming for 70+ years

[shepscapades]

okay am i crazy? someone please tell me I'm crazy, I saw the thumbnail for Xisuma's newest hermitcraft episode and was immediately reminded of the deepslate/blackstone palette and building style of all of the buildings from the Evil Empire in season 8. Clicked on the video and the introduction "Previously, on Hermitcraft" was voiced with Evil Xisuma's voice filters. I had thought Xisuma said in a recent FAQ video he had no plans to bring Evil X back into hermitcraft plot because the storytelling wasn't really his top priority, but this kind of seems like foreshadowing of some kind? Thoughts?Regardless, kind of a sickening thought for c!xisuma that Ex might just be. lurking. very cool <sweating

[maybmila]

One of their many, many, MANY bonding experiences with TOWW

Cw loud noise!

[diceisbored]

henry danger kiss headcannons!

navigation!

including : henry , ray , charlotte , jasper x reader (seperate)

(written with fem presenting/ fem reader in mind, but no specification)

wanings : tiny lil make out (jasper) , cursing (me) , no use of y/n , 2nd person (you , yours , etc.)

notes from dice! : hope someone likes this bcz i have no other ideas and two other drafts

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henry • peck

he's always on the move, whether it's as he's leaving for a "quick" mission with ray he'll give you one both as henry and kid danger

has to give you at least one per conversation, so if you talk alot just be prepared for a bunch of kisses

also kisses you as he's talking like he'll kiss you and then start talking and then kiss you and start talking again and repeat

"Oh, today me and Ray went to stop jeff-" he gave you a quick kiss, "From robbing the nice Nacho Ball-" He gave you another, which left you giggling.

you honor, he's a loverboy

honestly i feel like no matter what, he'll always say his favorite thing is kissing you. even if someone asks him as kid danger, he can't help but be honest!

ugh he so fine

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ray • head

bro if SO fucking domestic for no reason??

like no matter what, he'll refer to you as his wife. to everyone. and GOD FORBID someone corrects him

idk i just kinda think he likes seeing you as a staple in his always-changing life, like YOU are the only thing that stays the same

whenever yall are just like chilling or something i feel like he'll put an arm around you and just press a little kiss to your head

As you listened to Charlotte ramble about truly anything, you felt a pair of arms snake around your middle. "Hey, babe," He pressed a kiss to your temple.

yeah, he's domestic as fuck

he can't help it, whenever he sees you standing or sitting without him he feels the need to just make sure you know he loves you

even if you're like doing something really important, no matter who's there, it really shows everyone how much he cares.

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charlotte • face

you already know

charlotte would most probably love to just pepper your face with kisses all the time though she doesn't like pda too much

if you like/ want pda though, maybe she will from time to time (esp if it's an important event/ your friends are there)

"Hi, my love," You greet as she walks theough your bedroom door. She sets her stuff down and crawls beside you, cupping your face, ready to give you as many kisses and she can, "Hey."

she honestly doesn't care what her firemds think, she'd (probably) fight for you

so even if everyone is in the man cave, she will still be kissing your entire face the whole time

until- she's never gonna fucking stop. nice joke, though.

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jasper • hand

my boy just wants to feel chivalrous(?)

he loves just walking while holding your hand, and randomly bringing it to his mouth to kiss your knuckles.

he's just happy your with him, happy that he gets to call you his.

he tries to be polite and stuff 24/7 but with how much time you're around each other, it's hard not to get comfortable.

Slow kisses had eventually developed into hungry, fast kisses. While you were kissing on his neck and jaw, his attention was somewhere else. "So pretty darling," He spoke as he brought your hand to his mouth.

it doesn't matter when or where, as soon as his thoughts drift to you he can't help but put a kiss on your hand

if you touch his face at all, expect one on your palm- if you touch him literally anywhere other than his own, he will grab you hand just to kiss the back of it.

why is my boy so fucking underrated.?

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[purrvaire]

have you praised them today

[forestshadow-wolf]

It is VERY imperative that we think about some asshole trying to start a fight with soap, and Ghost stepping in, shielding soap with his massive body. And we get an understanding that it's not just because he doesn't want to see soap hurt in any way, but also because he knows soap enjoys (just a tiny bit) going feral and beating someone into the ground. And it's not that Ghost doesn't want to see that (he very much does) but they have places to be in the morning, and won't have time to bail soap out of jail if authorities are called

[mephopheles]

currently been home alone for 4 hours, take another sonic shitposting

[sahmekh]

is there still hype for strawberry girl ?!!!!