#is anyone else still alive out there
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put your blood on ice (you're not gonna make it)
She did it. She's in LA. She's on her own. She's living her dream. But what her naive 19-year-old self failed to consider is that the music industry is an adult world with adult competition that requires adult experience. Can Beca get by with the 1.5 friends she managed to scrape together, or will she drown in the hole she'd dug herself into?
...or the AU where Beca holds her dad to the deal they made and moves to LA after trying one year at college
[ao3 link]
#bemily#beca mitchell#emily junk#ppfic#oh a NEW fic??? for this mostly dead ship?????#is anyone else still alive out there#anyway here's a fic I've been 'writing' since 2019 LOL#yes it is a wip no idk if it will ever be finished#do you want it or not
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Just realised I have about 60k words worth of old-timey cowboys AU written that I have not drawn a SINGLE thing for
#Besides the piece that started it all of course#I really like this AU but it's so self-indulgent idk of anyone else would like the premise as much as I do#Noah is a little softer in this one but he kinda has to be#Martin is the son of the owner of the biggest ranch in a small town#Everyone knows him and think well of him type deal#He's his dad's golden child until he has an accident that ends up with him being bed bound#To which his father responds by hiding him away and never speaking about him again out of shame over the state of him#Cue Noah with a crush on him since he was a teenager#Until Martin vanished off the face of the earth#Years later he's still thinking about him and wondering what happened to him#He ends up taking a job at the ranch partly to help out his own dad but mostly because he's still drawn to the memory of Martin#While there he buys an ex-bucking horse to turn into his own working horse (Tansy) (She breaks Gabriel's hand. It's great)#Noah eventually figures out where it is they must be hiding Martin if he's still alive#And of course he has to break into the room in question to find him#They hit it off#Noah starts coming by in secret to keep him company or to bring him treats from town he hasn't had in years#And it all sort of spirals from there#Without revealing too much#I might post the very start on here cause it's one of my favourite things i've written#But i might have to do some art for it too#Not art#Outlaws AU
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Thinking about Akashi's parents as I always do, and I'm so very obsessed with the idea of heavily introverted asocial Masaomi, who can barely stand conversing with anyone outside his immediate family, and heavily extroverted talkative Shiori, who lives for attending social events and dragging her reluctant husband with her wherever she goes. Maybe this is just my desire to see loser (said endearingly) Masaomi look for the nearest quiet space five minutes into a gala, while Shiori is the one happily chatting it up with all of Masaomi's business partners like she's at a Sunday brunch with the girlies.
#yadda yadda something about opposites attracting#i know some people headcanon masaomi and shiori being brought together through arranged marriage#and i agree that it's a compelling headcanon#but because in the canon material masaomi did not marry anyone else after her and is still clearly grieving#i like to think that he chose to marry her and truly did love her presence#if it was all about marrying out of obligation i think he would have already remarried but even after 6 years he didn't so...#anyway all of this to say that i think shiori was probably a woman that brought masaomi out of his shell while she was alive#he doesn't seem like the super social type#and even with the scraps we got about shiori she seemed like a warm and inviting person#i have mentioned in a previous post that she was the bridge between her husband and her son#and i'm sure part of her personality is reflected in her son#i know i'm rambling i just like to think of cute memories the akashi might have had while they were alive#but lemme stop talking#kuroko no basket#knb headcanons#akashi masaomi#akashi shiori
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what the heck are you up to...
#I'm just going to color him like this until the official colors come out#oshi no ko#oshi no ko spoilers#hikaru kamiki#no but I think golden eyes make the most sense for him#AND YOU KNOW.. what if yura really listened to this guy and watched her steps..#what if she stopped going to the mountains after hearing what he's said how dangerous it can get#what if that was really a. genuine warning???#I reread that part and it's really weird#doodle#if you're going to murder someone do you say stuff that may hinder it from happening?#did this guy really kill anyone..?;;#ehhh if he did I'm going to be the first one to call him out#I feel like someone else pushed the actor even if he was there for it. could be nino.. could be someone else.. probably didn't do it alone#since yura was still alive when he came by and talked to her and she probably fell off a cliff#spoilers
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ngl I think it would be cool to read a Remnants fic where the premise is that something goes wrong and Sephiroth gets split into the Remnants pre-Nibelheim
#idk maybe the planet nuked him on accident who knows#angeal and genesis are still alive at this point#angeal's freaking the hell out while trying & failing to corral three unhinged SOLDIER-level teenagers to keep them out of trouble w shinra#genesis is still angry w his friend but now he's learning lots of stuff he didnt know abt his friend watching these guys and is conflicted#both are slightly grieving their friend bc the remnants are all thats left of their friend and they dont know if this is reversible#and the remnants!! get screentime!! and character development!! as they experience the world and learn about themselves!!! let them grow!!!#dang I think I'm gonna add this to my fic prompts but if anyone else likes this prompt go ham#ff7#final fantasy 7#remnants of sephiroth#sephiroth#cici speaks
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Back when mahiru thought his uncle might be dead he had a flashback to the accident that resulted in his mother's death, but one thing I noticed is that we don't actually see akira in this memory? It feels like either mahiru (or someone like lily or jeje) is supressing his memory here.
And if someone possibly killed akira on purpose, who was it and why?
#servamp#akira shirota#mahiru shirota#I mean the biggest plot twist would actually be that she faked her death and is actually alive/a vampire for whatever reason#But assuming she's dead who would have a motive#touma seems unlikely I feel like he would have taunted mahiru with that back when he mentioned killing several people#I forgot how old mahiru was when akira died but mikuni was probably still too young and also he used to hate humans getting killed#No idea why he's working with tsubaki to do a ritual that will kill all of tokyo now#Tsubaki maybe? He might know about what is so special about mahiru. In that case killing the mother (who also knew what's special about him#Would make some sense. She can't tell mahiru or anyone else about it if she's dead.#But killing her in a way that might have killed mahiru as well...assuming whatever is special about mahiru is needed for the ritual#Risky#But maybe mahiru's memories were faked like misono's were with the night kiriko died and mahiru wasn't actually there when akira got killed#Trying to kill tooru after he had to reveal his ties to c3 before he could explain to mahiru what's special about him#Would also fit with tsubaki#tsubaki would also have a motive not to taunt mahiru with it so nobody tries to look into it and finds out what killing her would achieve#If mahiru is needed for the ritual it's probably even better that mahiru and kuro found a way to get rid of the distance limit#because the enemies probably planned with the distance limit in mind meaning mahiru not needing to be there when kuro tries to stop tsubaki#Might be unexpected to them and throw a wrench in their plans
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khdr.... *collapses and dies*
#having a moment again thinking about like#specifically the part after x + e get back to scala after having lost hermod urd and bragi#knowing the missing upperclassmen are dead#feeling completely powerless and guilty that they couldn't save anyone#finding out the truth about baldr#and then the part when they realize that vor is still alive and she's just gotten back but now baldr is going after her#the frantic rush to the top of the tower as edge of existence kicks in#it just sounds like desperation. like this is their one last bit of hope#they can at least save her if nobody else#but only if they hurry#and they make it there in time but still can't save her#and that's just the final blow to their morale#and it's truly a wonder they could even pick themselves up after that#they couldn't even save the surviving upperclassmen. they couldn't save baldr#they save themselves. and *no one else*#just#ough#kingdom hearts#khdr
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Sora, who has murdered people and then laughed about it (maleficent, shan yu, floatsom and jetsum, sinking several ships of actual humans in the Caribbean though to be fair this one IS kh3) when grabbed by two people lightly on the shoulders: this is so unfriendly!
#listen i know that dream drop fed us sorikus a literal snow white narrative complete with a paopu fruit bearing rainbow keyblade#but was it worth it? was it worth it?#i think we could have kept thriving with just ''its riku! i looked everywhere for you!'' on his knees sobbing while he awkwardly dodges hug#from literally everyone else#we were doing fine without the gayblade#and i blame 3D for the lack of sora's love of murder in kh3#and for other lines which have sora come across as dumb instead of just distractable#cough i dont computer cough#sora you fly a fucking space ship regularly#what the fuck do you mean you dont computer#if you didnt computer then you donald and goofy would be fucking dead by now#sora#bad quotes bracket#regularpat#also before anyone comes in here saying that was Roxas's anger 1) sora is called angry several times in the kh1 manga and in recom itself#2) its both Roxas and Sora's anger combining. Don't forget the mental state sora is in in kh2. He doesnt know if RIku is alive; ppl keep#calling him Roxas; he just woke up and his memories are a fucking mess still; and then Kairi gets kidnapped#sora's infamous kh2 murder spree is mostly him for the non org members#then roxas' anger helps out once he starts taking out nobodies
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Oooooooough I just got a brainwave for turnabout ghoul and this could either be pure genius or a sign that I desperately need to sleep
Okay so- Prosecutors Gambit, case 3. The angels cookbook. What if, hear me out, there were rumours floating around that it contained some recipes for medicine that would allow ghouls to taste things like a human? They'd still get sick, but could taste things right and it'd help them blend in better. And what if Gusto was a ghoul that desperately wanted those medicines. And what if Delicia was an investigator because the CCG couldn't let that stuff get out. And what if those recipes are still locked and hidden away by Judy until IS-7 is finally cleared up and Delicia lets Edgeworth keep the recipes until ghoul legalization is in a better position and he finally has a cup of tea for the first time in 17 yearssssssss
#I do think that with Samson and Judy one of them is human and the other is a ghoul#Though I keep going back and forth on which#Though I'd guess it'd make the most sense with Samson being the ghoul#Because of that whole scene where greggy finds out what's in the cookbook#But it'd be really hard for him to exist in human jail for so long without anyone finding out and sending his ass to cochlea#So I wanna make it Judy I think#Either way I know in my heart of hearts greggy would take that secret to the grave#(Or should I say elevator (sorry))#Agh I just love the idea of miles feeling so guilty for so long thinking that his father would hate him and be disgusted he's a ghoul#Only to later find out he was one of the best humans for a ghoul to be around#Accepting and protecting and caring#Treating them like anyone else and helping them when they needed him#Gregory would love his ghoul son to the ends of the earth were he still alive#Turnabout ghoul
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Shoutout to bears in trees for making a sign for all the people who almost died as a little kid because that fucks you up and I’ve never felt known the way that Tai Chi With My Dad knows me
#chaoticbuggybitchboy#how to build an ocean: instructions#htbao:i#bit posting#bears in trees#tai chi with my dad#tw swearing#the bears are allowed to find this post because this song made me feel things I didn’t know I was missing#because I almost died and then I was fine and everyone moved on and nobody talks about how I still panic and cry over it#and I’ve never had anyone else who’s understood how it feels knowing that you should have died a decade and a half ago#because I’ve been on borrowed time since [5] and nobody around me acknowledges it#and then this song comes out of nowhere and wraps me up in a hug and tells me I’m not alone#because other people live on borrowed time and I’m just as alive as they are#and yeah anyways I’m crying over it because it’s not just me yk#and like#because holy fuck#it’s not just me#glowbug thoughts
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thinking abt vincent having his own little venom arc after he loses his powers bc he genuinely cannot handle being 'useless' in the grand scheme of things because hes. hes just a guy now. a human guy with nothing to his name but hes still surrounded by all these strong and powerful people
so when something major happens and he cant fathom just sitting by and doing nothing well. there are always more. unsavory methods to getting power
like getting possessed by a shade
and i know just the one!!
#mine#original character#ifrit is going to have so much fun hes been waiting for the day vincent would give up and come to him for 'help'#the working plot for this is something happened to joaquin and everyone else is wasting too much time and vincent is losing his MIND so he#he says fuck it and goes to get results himself. hes not gonna sit there patiently while his HUSBAND is in TROUBLE are you KIDDING ME#things. do not end very well but at least joaquin is still alive afterwards!#literally anyone: joaquin i thought you were the crash out one in this relationship#joaquin: who do you think i learned it from#joaquin: [lovingly] he is insane
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Superman: Metropolis Secret Files and Origins (2000) #1
#a Lena II mention I’ve never read before!!!#so at this point Mercy and Hope were present for when Lex has Lena’s nursery welded shut so that it could a permanent but inaccessible part#of the building#rather than converting the room to something else#but still earlier in this story Mercy was dismissive of that Lex had ever loved anyone#(of course- the fact that Lex traded Lena away is a hard hurdle for anyone to cross in believing he loved her)#the context of this scene is that Lex was having an affair with ‘Lois’ who was really Parasite in disguise#and now that that’s been uncovered he wants the real Lois found- and to find out if she’s still alive in the first place#which Mercy was doubting was because he genuinely cared about Lois#but now Lex accidentally refers to finding ‘my Lena’ instead of Lois#‘Always make indifference your ally. As such you will never reject solitude.’#implying that Lex isn’t indifferent to Lena’s absence and is struggling with being alone without her#there’s a bit when they reunite in Our Worlds at War where Lex tells Lena she’s wrong if she thinks he hasn’t missed her#but I think this is the first thing I’ve seen after the initial fallout in the first few issues after it#that demonstrates that#dc#lex luthor#lena luthor II#my posts#comic panels
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Fuuta crash out when
(don't mind the tags, i'm talking to fuuta)
#latching onto anything that can bring some sense of safety and reduce pain (even if just mentally). and what then.#how's that going for you buddy? when the pain lessens and voices quiet down. do all the thoughts just come crashing down on you?#do you think about your friends who abandoned you? the ones you got so attached to but they couldn't give less shit about you?#the ones who didn't feel even slightest bit of guilt like you did or else they'd also be in this damned prison suffering alongside you#the ones who looked the other way and let you take the full hit of the actions they've participated in so they don't face the consequences#do you think of your family? do you wonder if they're worried why you're gone? or do you feel like they haven't noticed at all?#or maybe it doesn't surprise you. your sister has her own life. you've never been close to your dad. and your mom is out of the picture.#does the guilt eat you up alive? do you feel on some level that you deserved what happened to you?#you've always seeked approval from others. to be told you're right. that you're doing good. how is this any different?#you need someone to tell you that it's not your fault the things happened that way. that you never intended any actual harm towards anyone.#saying being forgiven or not no longer matters but you don't really feel that way. it very much does matter to you.#do you still think of haruka? your new style choices. don't some of them feel inspired by him? was that intentional?#did you feel responsible for him? do you feel like you failed to save him? do you feel like you should have tried harder?#do you also think back on mahiru? she couldn't have been saved though. it was already too late for her.#you both faced injuries from same person. you wanted to die. she wanted to continue living. to show the power of her love.#and yet here you are. alive while she's gone. at very least you gave her some good memories in her last moments by being kind towards her.#do you think about amane? are you worried she may take the hit because of you? all she wanted to do is help you. to ease your pain.#but will warden see it that way? you probably hear the voices say it so already — that they want to vote her guilty this trial.#they want her dead. they want to kill her. the very girl who did her best to save you is now gonna die because of you.#yet another child will die because of you. it feels like you're infecting others with your bad luck.#the guilt of what happened. of what will happen. it's burning. it's painful.#but maybe if you believe hard enough at some all knowing being up above you'll somehow save everyone and yourself. maybe.
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bad end au tweek lives btw <3
#south park#bad end au#tweek tweak#congrats! i like you too much as a character to kill you off!!#you get to suffer trying to survive on your own with no support bc you can't trust anyone to support you instead!#everyone still thinks he's dead tho bc cavisuwa is a LYING LIAR#and tweek leans into the misconception by going full ghost. his ass is NOT where anyone can find him#one of his early shelters ended up becoming a resistance base temporarily (long after he left it)#when he returned to it years after and realized ''other people have been here'' he freaked out and traveled as far away as possible#craig & cavi are the only ones aware that cavi lied about killing tweek btw. they have no idea where he ran off to#or what happened to him in the years that followed. but craig is certain he has to still be alive#refuses to believe anything else
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as I'm going back over my past history and items and journals and years, I come across all sorts of things, like the pencil I saved from that so-precious memory from second grade, and a pair of flip flops I've been missing for two years, and [checks notes] the modern-high-school-AU-kidnapped-by-a-serial-killer story I wrote in late high school jdfsjdfsjkjlksfd
#i can't wait to find out what red flags I didn't see in my own self back when I last read this thing in 2015 hfdhfdhjsfd#also. there's gonna be like a good sentence here and there and then CRINGE. the whole rest of everything is just me still trying to copy th#breathing pace (essentially) and ways-of-describing-things of mainstream authors like I thought I was supposed to#so this'll be somewhat painful but also god what a joy and a gift and an honor and a delight to get to hold this close to my heart#and witness it with understanding and empathy and slow reflection and care like my past younger self deserves#i'm so lucky i'm alive to be here and do this#i'm so grateful i'm headed towards welcoming back and embracing the last little girl i was that still felt a lot of things#so excited for her focus and precision and tenacity and constant curious joy and movement to be back someday#i'm afraid people won't like the me i was before rule after rule and then dangers#but my god it'll feel so good to be the fully-flowing energy machine and dance and conduit again how will I have enough bother to care?#people who are good to each others' nervous systems cumulatively feel better and better#if i'm not good for you and yours then you really truly SHOULD go elsewhere and find someone who makes YOUR self feel right and light + war#anyway now that i wrote an essay in the tags as usual [nervous laughter]#personal#add to journal#words n rhythm#WHY DID I FEEL CAPABLE OF UNDERTAKING A STORY LIKE THIS#cradling my past self gently but also BANGING my HEAD against the WALL lmao#i'm proud of myself for writing and sharing this and its creative ideas. even if i don't like it now or feel ashamed or see mistakes.#anything. it mattered that it came to me and it mattered that i explored it and it mattered that i poured myself through it to help shape i#and it mattered that I left it on the internet so that now it still exists. i'm going to honor this story no matter what current me would#objectively think about it if it was written by anyone else.#this is a gift i give myself now.#this is a lot of what I learn and learn to do#trauma evolution#mosswrites
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man. Kevin being painstakingly aware of how he's nobody's first choice. he wasn't Carlos's, though for a time he thought he was, and he went into a relationship with Charles with it made clear very early on- which isn't a problem or flaw, but disheartening regardless
#Ive said it before but I think some of Kevin's hesitancy about his and Charles's relationship after finding out ab Donovan#came from how things went with Carlos and the fear of losing someone because you're not the most important person to them#I think. he's Lauren's first choice. but that may very well come from. I don't think she really has anyone else#at least not anymore#she mentions having had siblings. i wonder if theyre even still alive#but thats getting off track#joyousposting#wtnv
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