#ipad finally working again! now i can post this!

[fizpup]

august breeze 🌊 (8/12)

[indefiniteavatar]

So basically, in a case about him shoving money at someone so they shut up about him. . .he can’t shut the fuck up himself. I would say something clever and funny here, except the sad part is that this is just so normal in current politics that it’s just. . .not hilariously absurd behavior anymore? Not to say that it’s not absurd - it is beyond such, but it is just. . . predictable, I suppose.

I guess this is how I feel about politics lately? Either I get mad at everything or I try to laugh at everything and normally that works because politicians usually aren’t so tragically stupid so very often, but now I just kinda have to chuckle at the particularly eyeroll worthy things like this, and try to ignore everything else or my brain will explode.

[rottenlemonontheroad]

ig I’m doing that notes thing that I’ve been seeing a lot (all numbers r gonna be low cuz my account kinda dead rn)

5 notes: I’ll post more cat pictures cuz people seem to enjoy those

10 notes: I’ll lock in on the writing requests I got rn

15 notes: I’ll try to better my sleep schedule

20 notes: I’ll start recording for the slenderverse arg

25 notes: I’ll get a therapist finally

30 notes: I’ll come out to my friends

That’s all for now :)

Edit 1:

I GUESS IM ADDING MORE

60 notes: I’ll hang out w my friends again

65 notes: I’ll try to get back into doing art

70 notes: I’ll try n get a boyfriend :)

80 notes: I will post bunny pics ( I hav a pet bunny too)

100 notes: I’ll get a job

115 notes: I’ll work on a ren fair costume n post photos

125 notes: I’ll do a hair reveal

140 notes: finish reading the books I haven’t finished

edit 2: 

190 notes: I’ll start doing Duolingo again

200 notes: I’ll take a shower every night for 10 days

220 notes: I’ll stop being a iPad kid and go outside 😭😭

240notes: I’ll make some sushi n eat it :) (tbh I really m craving sushi rn so yeah-)

260 notes: Kinda like the one on the first one BUT I will start sleeping for a WHOLE 8 HOURS A NIGHT!!!! (For at least a week cuz no way I can do that forever)

270 notes: I’ll start wearing makeup again :)

300 notes: I’ll clean my room

320 notes: I’ll post my dumb ahh art

340 notes: I’ll organize my phones apps (w proof)

370 notes: i organize my computer (w proof)

400 notes: I’ll actually try hard this coming school year

430 notes: room tour

450 notes: I’ll start sewing stuff again

500 notes: I’ll put a screen time thing on my phone 😭

Edit 3:

Since people hav been asking for more here it is (Unachievable goals so they take longer) most of these r gonna be writing cuz i havent wrote in a while n need to

600 notes: I'll update all of my wattpad fanfics w a new chapter

680 notes: I'll start writing the book i have been thinking about doing (+Post it)

720 notes: I'll finally post my requests that ppl hav given me n that i hav just kept updating

750 notes: I'll post my oc's

800 notes: I'll start playing the flute again

900 notes: .... I will give you guys my wattpad account....

THAT'S ALL FOR NOW

@chlover-my-shingles

[theambivalentagender]

Hello all! So if you follow me, you likely also follow my comic Valley Echoes as well as any of my other art drabbles. You may also know that I've been financially limping along for some time.

For context, my day job is dog grooming. It's a "career" I came into relatively recently and honestly love. However, my location has recently been incredibly dead. I haven't been able to make commission from lack of dogs and my hours have been cut drastically.

I'm currently looking into finding extra work where I can that will still fit with my technically full time schedule. This has been a big part of why the comic updates have slowed considerably in the last few months.

In the meantime, however, I did want to show that I am available for commissions at this time. This is the first time I'd be getting into commissions, so if folks do request I just ask for patience as I figure it all out, but I'd love to be able to draw your requests. I have a vgen account that's still being set up at the moment.

I also want to plug my Patreon again - honestly, the fact you all give this much for what I do now is incredible to me. I recently met the fun "milestone" of Patreon temporarily locking access to my withdrawals because I had made enough money this year to require filling out a tax form before my funds could be released, which I did. Maybe it's silly but it made me a little happy. I also have a Kofi though that's updated less.

This next part ended up being much longer and more personal than I expected so I'll put it under a cut.

Anything at this time would help immensely. Cost of living is insane, I just turned 30 and keep wondering how much longer I'll be able to keep renting, let alone ever saving to afford a home. I'm very, very lucky in that I have support from my dad, who has honestly been one of my strongest lifelines for years. But I obviously don't want to have to keep taking so much of that support from someone who should be enjoying retirement.

There are a lot of expenses I keep having, and things I'm putting off. The ipad I use for art has been cracked for months, but is still functional thank god. I recently finally bought myself clothes that aren't falling off my body after losing over 100 lbs in the last year. I have to buy and maintain my own tools for my grooming job, and I have to maintain my own health, both mentally and physically. My left hand/arm probably has nerve impingements and muscle strains science hasn't even named yet lmao. And of course there's taking care of my two terrible feline children who cause nothing but chaos in my home and who I love dearly.

Even if you don't give monetary support though, I so, so greatly appreciate every one of you who shares, likes, or comments on my work. I just recently got an anon who I mean to reply to soon gushing about they love Valley Echoes. Nothing makes my day more than waking up to see a million notifications that's just one person liking each of my comics as they read through it the first time.

Ever since I was 6 years old I wanted to be a storyteller in some way. I used to draw my own Dilbert and Far Side comics, and I constantly wrote wild fantasy stories. But after going through college, dealing with a huge amount of stress, burnout, and just one random person online telling me that I needed to hear the harsh "truth" that my writing skills were garbage, that spark was just gone. Excluding occasional stuttering starts, I didn't really write for years.

Doing this "silly" comic and getting the feedback I have is starting to rekindle that spark. I have so many stories of my own that I'm starting to make tentative plans on producing in some way. But even if I never become some official published recognized author, I feel like just putting out this comic is fulfilling that dream I had as a kid. So thank you again, as cheesy and long winded as this post has become.

[genericpuff]

The Kiss Bet Episode 172 - Hot Pot and Venting About How I Want My 70 Cents Back

Okay, look, this isn't a post I was expecting to make today but it's something that just happened and I have to fucking talk about, so let me preface this with some context.

I had to buy coins recently and because I switched to using my iPad for reading comics on, I got a "new reader" type deal from Webtoons for a coin bundle that got me like 100 coins for $5; because technically it was a 'new account' as Webtoons operates their in-game currency model on apps, not on actual emails (meaning if you use the app on an Android phone and then switch to an Apple iOS device, they're technically two separate accounts which you sync the reading data between via the account info linked via the email, therefore they have two separate coin wallets).

So with more coins than I knew what to do with, I decided to start FastPassing The Kiss Bet again, which I had recently stopped FP'ing around the S3 mark, as it's recently devolved back into the "will they won't they" trope, but instead of between Sara-Lin and Joe, it's between Sara-Lin and Joe's younger brother (the "true endgame") Oliver.

Now I don't mind the ship in essence. Joe was definitely not gonna be endgame, it was always gonna be Oliver, anyone who's read any amount of romance before - especially high school romances - knows how this shit tends to go, and The Kiss Bet isn't exactly trying to be groundbreaking or subversive in any way, it knows exactly what it's about and what it's trying to accomplish.

But it's almost become a little too good at this. Because in playing the "will they won't they" game for so long with a character that we know is endgame, it's basically been weeks and weeks and weeks of-

That said, after I caught up on the recent FP episodes, it seemed like stuff was finally moving a little bit. We were finally meeting Oliver's mom and his stepdad who he has a fractured relationship with, Joe was finally getting with his true endgame girl, Vicky (who's totally not an exact genderbent version of Joe lmao) and Sara-Lin was finally realizing she had feelings for Oliver.

And then the newest episode came out, Episode 172 - Hot Pot and Venting.

CAUTION: FASTPASS SPOILERS FOR THE KISS BET OFFICIALLY BEGIN HERE!

Already I was a little petty over the title like "lmao ok clunky title but whatever". I swept it off as not a genuine criticism, just me being a nitpicking asshole over what's essentially Fluff: The Comic.

The episode cost 7 coins, which is about roughly 70 cents, albeit closer to a dollar for Canadian readers (here's something they don't tell you about Canada - our Monopoly game currency is just as fucked as it looks) and that's where I'm gonna get into my second disclaimer that I need to be perfectly clear about (and it'll be what we get more into later on in this post).

I understand the principle of paying for art. I understand fully that many of these webtoons are being produced on tight deadlines by creators who often can only afford 1-2 assistants, if any at all. I understand and fully agree that creators deserve to be paid for their skills, time, and efforts, not just as creators working on the hellsite that is Webtoons, but as artists in general who deserve to make a living the same as anyone else. Anyone who follows my stuff here knows I'm an artist myself so I would never debate the ethical necessity of paying artists for their work.

However.

I can say that, and also agree with the people who have stated in discussion circles such as on /r/webtoons that a lot of the comics that have started charging 7 coins have been suspiciously delivering less comic since. And it's not even so much in the literal panel count, the liquid volume of these comics have remained the same, but the calorie count has dropped significantly. Food metaphors aside, what I mean is that despite many of these comics maintaining their 40-60 minimum panel count requirement, they have in fact reduced the actual amount of content that happens in them, and The Kiss Bet's newest episode is a stark example of what I mean.

I am going to start by posting only post three panels - three panels that literally sum up the entirety of Episode 172 and what it chooses to spend its time on.

That is it. That is literally all that's established in this episode. I'd tell you to go read it yourself, but honestly, this is genuinely one of those rare times I can honestly say that a 40+ panel episode is not worth 70 cents and you'd be better off, and that's saying a LOT when these episodes are only priced at the cost of a gumball. At least Lore Olympus has entertainment in how bad it is most of the time, Episode 172 of The Kiss Bet is just nothing. You will literally get more substance and flavor from an actual gumball.

Literally every other panel in this episode is either repeating the same dialogue (Sara-Lin saying the same thing multiple different times to express how Oliver is holding her hand or how his stepdad is a dick) and then Sara-Lin and Oliver staring at each other. Over. And over. Again.

I am not joking. I did not cut anything out in that sequence. That is where the episode ends. Complete nothingburger, seemingly cut off right as it was just getting started like Cait Corrain's career.

Out of the entire episode, there were 45 panels. So I can safely assume Ingrid's minimum panel requirement is at least 40 per episode, that's me assuming the best that she didn't exactly meet her panel minimum at 45 panels on the dot.

Out of those 45 panels, there were:

Two actual unique backgrounds that weren't gradients or just a single piece of furniture

4 separate panels of Sara-Lin freaking out over Oliver holding her hand and wondering if he even noticed

10 panels of Sara-Lin staring at Oliver either dumbfounded or asking him to repeat himself (or apologizing over nothing)

5 panels of the characters saying nothing

11 panels of Sara-Lin repeating information in different ways that could have been accomplished in half that time

Two separate occasions of Oliver getting Sara's attention from off-panel, literally formatted the exact same way both times (and both followed by reaction panels of Sara-Lin staring at him dumbfounded)

Way too many panels of Sara-Lin blushing in response to Oliver being an asshole tbh like literally this guy's a douchebag, Joe may have been the "out of her league" love interest but at least he was nice and didn't treat Sara-Lin like someone who just bought a Husky as a "starter pet" ???

Again, I don't usually like being a dick about the coin costs, and I definitely don't like being a hypocrite in telling people they should pay artists for their work while simultaneously posting their paywalled content like this, but I think there does come a point where it feels more irresponsible for people to not be aware of what they're about to pay for and how little they're going to be getting. This episode is literally one of the best - and worst - examples of how far the romance genre has fallen on the platform - when it's not being overtaken and oversaturated by problematic series that romanticize abuse and sexual assault, it's being dragged to death with the most boring executions of tropes that everyone has seen before and is only exciting for anyone who's never read a book or watched a romance movie, period.

And here's the thing where I do approach a bit more "hot take" territory, but every time I see this argument come up about episodes not being worth the coin cost, I see others who rightfully argue that 70 cents isn't that much to pay for what you're getting - weekly episodes of work that are usually always delivered on time, with more panels than you would ever typically see in a free to read comic.

But here's where I take issue with that argument, as much as the principle of it is sound, it misses the overall point: readers are paying for entertainment first and foremost, so can anyone who's actually paying for regular refills on their app currency step away from this and truly call it "entertainment"? Nothing was gained. The comic had 45 panels to say something, anything, and managed to not even squeak out so much of a word. Even the silent moments have no substance, they just reiterate information that we already know.

Do we really need another panel of Sara-Lin blushing at Oliver? We've known for weeks now that she has a crush on him. Do we really need another panel of Oliver getting Sara-Lin's attention? What is this actually showing of their chemistry? What is being shown here that hasn't been shown numerous times - with and without dialogue - for weeks now? What does the comic have to show for itself after four seasons?

Another point of the "it's just 70 cents, don't be an asshole" argument that people seem to miss is it's not 70 cents. It's $1. Because if you want to buy a single episode of the Kiss Bet, you can't just pay for the individual episode in isolation, you have to pay for the coins first, and $1 is the absolute bare minimum you have to pay to get 10 coins, which will only pay for one episode of a 7 coin series - of which there are many now, basically any series that's 40 panels or more will cost 7 coins and, shocker, those are the series that WT will tend to promote most, you'll rarely see the 5 coins series in the banner ads, and that's not even getting into how there are more and more series cropping up that have 5+ episodes behind FP rather than the traditional three.

So if you're someone who's (almost definitely) keeping up with more than one series? You can't just pay the $1, you have to pay at least $5 for 50 coins, and that will NOT go far anymore or cut as evenly as it used to when just about every series is now 7 coins. Webtoons knows fully well what kind of game they're playing by making the new coin cost an uneven number while still offering increments of 5/10 in their coin bundles. They undoubtedly want you to be left with an uneven number so that you'll be easily lured into buying more coins so you don't 'waste' the uneven amount you have left that isn't enough to buy the episodes for the series you want to read. Obviously this is more speculation and not fact, but it's a common business model and with the series that have adopted the 7 coin count model (rather than starting off with 7 coins outright) such as The Kiss Bet and Lore Olympus, it's becoming abundantly clear that either the creators or the platform itself is encouraging these series to meet their panel minimums with as little content as possible in order to get more money out of readers who are barely even being drip fed actual entertainment and narrative progression, let alone spoon fed.

And then there's the waiting. The goddamn waiting. So many of these series guilty of siphoning their content off through a hose that they're deliberately standing on are designed intentionally with the most egregious cliffhangers in mind to keep their audience hooked so they'll undoubtedly FP next week. Do you know what that amount of waiting does to a comic? To its readers? First off, it artificially extends the actual pacing of the comic to make it feel longer than it is, when in reality, many of these plotlines are happening in a vacuum of very short bursts of time. Case in point, Lore Olympus is commonly confused for having a plotline that takes place over the course of months, when actually when laid end to end in order of cause and effect, many of its subplots - including the romance of Hades and Persephone - takes place over the course of days. This over-inflates the plotline's actual depth and, even worse so, it makes it harder for readers to keep up with information that's being delivered, as it often takes weeks for that information to actually go anywhere - so by the time it does, many readers have straight up forgotten about it.

It's absolutely not okay that so many of these kinds of series are normalizing literal slow burning for an audience who's paying to be entertained. It's not a "slow burn". It's just slow, and deliberately so. It's absolutely NOT FUN to follow a comic that does not go anywhere week after week. It's frustrating. And before long, it starts to feel like gambler's fallacy, where readers have to essentially gaslight themselves into paying into it more and more convinced that it has to pay off eventually, based on a promise that was never actually made, only assumed in good faith. And readers should not have to fill in the bulk of the content that isn't happening with their own imaginations, which is something that happens a LOT in these series that spend so much time on the characters just staring at each other and saying nothing. It's not 'plot' to just draw characters blushing and have your audience fill in the rest of it entirely on their own. This is certainly a technique in writing, but in the case of The Kiss Bet and other comics like it, it's much less of a valid technique and more just flat out manipulating your audience into falling so hard into the sunk cost fallacy trap that they don't notice they're being robbed blind by the plot that hasn't actually happened - and they've been paying for that financial and emotional robbery out of their own pockets and brains every step of the way.

Again, I do not care about the coin cost in and of itself, seventy cents IS still an incredibly cheap price for weekly updates of a series that has to put out so many panels each week. But as a reader and a customer, I should not be leaving these updates with less information than what I started with. And I'm someone who's incredibly old school by webcomic standards, there are comics that I follow that have updated 1-2 pages a week for over a decade that manage to do more with their limited pages than Lore Olympus and The Kiss Bet manage to do after entire hiatuses filled with pre-production time.

Why does this page of Alfie manage to move both the intrinsic plot of the titular character as well as the external plot that's going on around her in one page made up of 5 panels better than what The Kiss Bet can do in 45?

Why does this page of Tamberlane manage to convey more information about the world's lore and the people in it in a way that's emotionally driven and clearly affecting the characters without outright info-dumping than what Lore Olympus has managed to spit out onto its plate since S3 started over a year ago?

How does Tales from Alderwood manage to be more entertaining and convey more meaningful storytelling through its characters in a single page consisting of zero dialogue than what The Kiss Bet can convey in its silent panels of staring, blushing, and repetitive stuttering?

Why are the creators who are relying entirely on their own efforts, resources, and ability to generate income through community interaction and support putting out better work with less panels and on slower schedules for FREE than what we're seeing from professional creators on a professional publishing platform who are being paid to do this as their job?

There's this saying in the tattooing industry: good work isn't cheap and cheap work isn't good.

At this point, 70 cents is not a 'bargain' as many people like to argue in defense of the creators. And while I do want to have good faith in the creators who don't pull this shit, the creators who clearly go above and beyond to do what they do in the pursuit of storytelling and polishing their craft to be the best piece of work that it can be - the comics that are worth paying 70 cents and beyond for - are not the comics that Webtoons is promoting to people. The creators of the works that genuinely deserve more than 70 cents per update are being left to fend for themselves without support from the platform, while those that aren't worth the price of even a flavorless gumball are consistently winning the Wonka Golden Ticket lottery.

The cost of 70 cents is relative. For some works it's a genuine bargain. For others like the The Kiss Bet and Lore Olympus, 70 cents is not a "bargain", it's not a "good deal", it's exactly the value of what you're paying for - cheap work that isn't good.

[emberunderscore]

how it started vs how its going

big paragraph for context under the cut cause I think the last time I posted about this was in april-

im working on an animation to disembodied mind by sparkbird, I had the idea back in april but stopped working on it around the time of the fable finale bc of lore inaccuracies

earlier this month I started using my ipad and drawing on procreate again for the first time in a while (the screen was really broken and half of it didn't pick up touch) and I was having fun so I started the whole animation again, including actually planning out the whole thing

I did get the screen of my ipad fixed a couple days ago so now theres nothing that can stop me and I finished the first minute of the song in like 20 days so MAYBE this gets actually released at some point (and hopefully I still keep up with writing while doing this)

[louroth]

Well, well, well. Would you look at what the cat dragged in. (it's me, Lou!)

The time is here, and oh man, do I have a lot to say! Ever since this post was posted on my personal tumblr, on the fifth of may, I have been working like a machine on all things OUROBOROS. I had originally planned for this to just be a progress report/ announcement on what I will be working on now that I am free of the shackles of work, but, somehow, I managed to finish all bullet points, and more. So, let's get into it!

First off, the title.  Ouroboros becomes all capitalized OUROBOROS. Idk. It's neat. Next!

Art. Whew. I didn't think I could draw like this anymore- drawing has been more of a struggle than writing has been, forever, always- it was something I really strived to become good at, for a time. And I gave up. Only to pick it up again when I started ouro, and ever since I released that pressure, something just clicked and I have been churning out art like never before. I don't know if this is a fluke, a stroke of luck or if all that hard work I once did slaving away with menial art practice… but I'm grateful nonetheless. (A note on official RO art: I lost my ipad pencil somewhere on the lawn, lmao. I haven't been able to get a new one yet, so there is a slight delay here.) I am hoping that I get to make some commissions too, in the near future. Visit the forum to see some works in progress (amongst them, Yor's RO portrait!)

Onto the hellscape that is coding! I have been growing more proficient with CSS and html with the help of the ones that run so that we can walk; I have studied and researched and tested and tinkered until my eyes crossed, finding my way into this medium with the incredible guidance of the giants of whose shoulders I stand on. I will talk about this in detail on a later date. So I think it's finally time to reveal that yes, I am working on a twine version of ouro. I will develop it in tandem with choicescript; the porting over from one to the other isn't the herculean task I thought it would be.

Why am I doing this? Because I need to have a save system. I am continuing to write the whole alpha draft in choicescript in hopes that CoG will announce the ability to have a native save/checkpoint system, but if that doesn’t happen, I can’t publish this story without one. Unfortunately, I am not willing to code in a savesystem in choicescript myself, because this will be a large game, with far too many variables for that to be sustainable. Trust me, no one is more disappointed by that fact than me. If it comes to the point that twine publishing will be what I do, I will set my sights on writing a smaller game for hosted games. 

Now the meatier announcements!

New Socials!

Tumblr: You are looking at it!  This is the new, exclusively OUROBOROS blog where I will share all announcements and sneak-peeks, and future updates. I worked together with the dev of the theme and made it oh, so pretty and functional. Please check out their portfolio here, if you are ever in the market for sprucing up your (desktop version) of tumblr. They were a pleasure to work with. Amongst other things, it has a gorgeous header (again, only if you visit on web and not mobile) where I am showcasing fanart and official art. Go check it out! This month, I am showcasing a truly breathtaking art from KAIRELART, and you can find the full art here, or follow the links in the “FEATURED ARTIST” tab in the top bar.

I hope you enjoy this new haven for OUROBOROS! I will be answering questions once a week (saturday) and ramping up as I adapt to this new schedule, more on that further below.

My old tumblr, honeypeabrain, will revert back to being my personal blog. Feel free to keep following me there, but know that it will be inundated with shitposts, crass humor and the occasional poetry dump and personal post. You’ve been warned!

Discord!

By the good graces, this was ROUGH to set up. Working with discord bots is akin to wrangling code, and it was well and truly, a war. But with the help of many, it is finally all done and ready for anyone to join and talk to me and others about OUROBOROS and anything else between heaven and earth. 

I will also greatly appreciate if any future bugs and feedback are submitted through here, so I can keep easier track of it. Come join us! (18+ ONLY.)

Patreon & Ko-Fi

Yep! Ko-fi is just a place to toss me a coin if you wish to help me towards the goal of new PC parts to make testing easier, or to just show appreciation for those that have it to spare. Patreon however, already has a multitude of posts and will be a hub for exclusive NSFW sidestories that you get to vote on, loredives and extensive sneak peeks, Q&A’s, polls and weekly dev logs. 

Right now, there are only two tiers, but I expect it to grow as my story does. I have many plans, but I am going at a steady pace. 

Amongst tiered content, there is a (free) NSFW story with female MC and Idren to read there right now, if you want to check it out! I am mgoing to post it on tumblr and the adult thread here over the weekend.

NOTE: I stupidly didn't realize that patreon had a review process after I pressed launch, which I did just a few minutes ago. Sigh. I am going to post the short on tumblr and the adult forum thread as soon as I get to it.

It is not mandatory by any means, so if you do choose to support me, you have my eternal gratitude as these places will be the sole source of income for me.

Onto writing:

The best news out of this whole bunch is that I have worked so hard on editing and writing, that in the past month I have all but finished a two chapter update! I have a chunk of about 5-6 thousand words left to write, and I am going to buckle down over the weekend to see it through. I wanted to have it done so badly for today, but I lost three days of writing time last week due to still being weighed down with work. I hope it isn’t too disappointing to have to wait until monday for the demo update! I am going to post a link to an as-I-write updated demo on Patreon and Discord, if you want to see the ugly face of raw wip drafts. Otherwise I will post the demo update here on Monday with a comprehensive post!

And now!  the biggest news is… from now on, I am writing full time!

This is what I have been tossing and turning about every night ever since Easter. It started as a silly idea while talking to some friends and family about how I was looking for a change in career. And then, little by little, that idea whittled down to a plan, carefully carved by my partner and his whispers of a happy future, a finished dream project, and something to be proud of until the day I wither and die. 

Somewhere between then and now, I grasped a tiny sliver of bravery and held on for dear life. 

I quit my job as a teacher, and instead of accepting a cushy office job, I started behaving as if OUROBOROS and writing was my work (for all the moments I could afford). I have researched and tried different methods from week to week, and although I was still tired from work, I felt like I was onto something that could build into a sustainable future. 

I have no doubts that this journey will be bumpy and long, but sometimes all it takes is to take that first step, and do it with determination. It might all crash and burn and fail in a spectacular way, or with a whimper, but then I will know that I have tried. I will know that I gave myself the chance to be who I want to be, work on what means so much to me. 

And that’s it. I think the hardest part of formulating this post (I’ve written about 50 versions of it!) is getting to the point; the kernel of what makes it so special to me. So, in my heart of hearts, what I'm trying to tell you is that I'm gonna give it my all- and while I know the road to having a sustainable career in writing is rough and ever winding, I do know for sure that I am ready for a challenge, to pour my heart and soul into it until the day I rush out of the office screaming IT IS DONE. IT IS DOOOOONE!!! 

If you decide to join me, I will treasure your company like a lantern in the dark. Hand in lovable hand, let’s fucking go.

[stephdrawsjohnlock]

Zombie sherlock and witch John?

SH – :Halloween 2022/23: Procreate on iPad Pro

I'M ONLY A YEAR LATE LOVELY, I'M SO SORRY!!!!

As you can see by the date, I finished this last November, and instead of just posting it... I... just kept putting it off and now it's the following October so HERE WE GO!! Better late than never I suppose.

So, last year I asked for Halloween pic ideas and this ask was the only full ask I got, so I did it, and then I ran out of time and finally finished it super late. I like to have a Halloween pic every year, but last year ran away from me, and this year I've been busy working on my FTH entries, so now's a good time as any for Witchy John and Zombie Sherlock!!

I like this one, it was fun to draw. I like creating overly detailed costumes for characters so yeah :) Sorry again for how long it's been, but I hope you like it all the same @aurelievanimpe 💜

Happy Halloween, all :)

🖼 I’M ON INSTAGRAM at stephdrawsfanart 🎨 @stephratte is my Primary Fanart Blog! Art © to S.G.M. Ratté. Do not repost or sell.

(Tags below cut, dm to be added/removed)

@queerbeess

@ayryn-art

@antisocial-otaku

@havetardiswilltimetravel

@yorkiepug

@tea-and-gingernuts

@quantum-sparrow

@chinike

@chained-to-the-mirror

@almosttomorocco

@loveismyrevolution

[magolandandfriends]

TWITTER SHENANIGANS [ Season 1 - Part 3 ]

⋆｡ ﾟ☁︎｡ ⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡ ⋆ ⋆｡ ﾟ☁︎｡ ⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡ ⋆ ⋆｡ ﾟ☁︎｡ ⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡ ⋆

[ Part 4 ]

[ Back To Part 1 ]

(Erm *checks watch* Its been more than a week- BUT GOOD FUCKING NEWS. I GOT MY NEW IPAD AND PENCIL UP AND RUNNING SO NOW I CAN FINALLY ANSWER THESE ASKS.)

(Obviously since classes are actually starting I’m going to be busy but probably not too busy since I don’t have a lot of friends in college as of right now but I have hope that I can make a buddy or 2 one day)

(Once again I found some tweets/tumblr posts and decided to remake them- why? I need to put something out there before people start to get concerned with me disappear for a week- this totally isn’t a excuse for not writing an essay hey stop looking at me like that iM TRYING MY BE S T-)

(Ok I’m gonna be productive for real this time I’ll see you guys when I post my ask- when will that be? I have no clue- it’s a long one- and after that I’m working on the ones from July- bear with me-)

[tranquilpetrichor]

the formula for late nights

cast: gunwook (zb1) x gn biochem major!reader

wc: 722

genre: college!au

warnings: food, mentions of yn drinking sometimes to deal with stress, descriptions of food, academic pressure

a/n: eris try to make a story where yn isn't slightly unhinged challenge failed. also the two could be interpreted as having a crush on one another. now that my finals are over, hopefully i can post more

sitting on an armchair in your suite, you sigh with relief as you finish your chemistry homework. you place the little pencil back into the iPad and shut the case. the device goes back into your bag, where you hope you won't have to see it until tomorrow's class.

you're glad that you've finished your homework for the day because you're sure as hell that you cannot handle doing another problem (no more stoichiometry, please!).

your friend, park gunwook, steps into the common room of your suite and greets you. he's been over for a while, but he was busy helping someone else in the suite with math homework and hasn't bothered you since.

he'd wondered if anyone would even ask for his tutoring help, but you assured him that there would always be someone agonizing over math. hm, maybe you should try it one day (if only you had the time)..

he glances at your packed bag. "so, you're finally done suffering through chem?"

you groan, stretching your muscles. holy shit, you worked for about an hour without getting up?

"i guess. for now, at least."

he chuckles and walks over to your snack cabinets. "for now."

you're not even tall enough to reach some of the shelves on the upper cabinets without the usage of a step stool, yet he has the audacity to steal food from there sometimes.

seemingly changing his mind, he walks to the freezer instead, opening the door to peek inside. you don't bother to ask what he's looking for because you already know.

"i can say goodbye to my chocolate ice cream," you mutter.

he protests. "what? it's good. and it's not my fault we like the same flavor."

perks of having a friend with way too much of a similar taste in food, you suppose.

"i guess we could share? we do have a lot."

not even thirty seconds later, two small bowls, two spoons, and an ice cream scoop are out, the latter item present because you never want to try scooping out ice cream with a regular spoon again.

there also happens to be brownies in the fridge that another friend of yours named jiwoo brought over yesterday.

"take them," she had said, "i won't finish them all anyways."

of course you took them, because who are you to say no to offerings of food?

you find the container and give it to gunwook, who's sitting on the couch across from the tv. there's six brownies left, but you'll probably save some for later.

"oh, we forgot drinks." gunwook says. he stares at you as your lips curve into a knowing smile. "no, y/n, not the alcoholic kind. we are not asking our neighbors for soju today."

you pretend to be disappointed and laugh. "don't worry, you know i only allow myself to drink in the dorms during weekends. it's only thursday. and it's an every-other-week type of thing."

(is it from stress built up through the week? perhaps. did you choose the life of a biochem major willingly? yes, so maybe this is your fault.)

gunwook looks for some chocolate milk instead and rolls his eyes.

"not the best habit, but at least you're more responsible than some other people we know."

you shudder. having to be the parent of the group along with gunwook and help drunk friends home from frat parties is a terrible experience, but you digress. tonight is a time for staying in, occupying the couch, and sharing treats.

he calls out to you. "do you want to watch tv?"

without a second thought, you perk up and join him on the couch. he's already unfolded the blue blanket that sits there, and drapes it over both of you.

"what show?"

he's surfing through the various programs on his tv, and you seem to sink a little further into the couch.

"how about the last of us?"

you nod. "i haven't even started it yet."

(you're known in the friend group for saying "i'll watch [insert show]" and never doing it.)

he smiles and navigates over to hbo max on the screen with your remote. "i think a little brain break is well-deserved."

"couldn't agree more."

with that, you allow yourself and gunwook the luxury of another late night spent in good company with each other.

[wyervan]

hiiii just wanna start off by saying I love your art style and general vibes ✨️ I'm a stay-at-home partner always in search of fun things to do, and I've recently gotten back into art after not engaging with it since I was a kid (largely because your sun n moon fixation rubbed off on me 😭). I've never tried digital art and it looks cool! Do you have any advice for a beginner like me?

Oh it makes me so happy when people say I inspired them to start creating again 😭 The DCA and the fandom brought me out of my own years-long artistic funk last spring. Clown power, yeehonk 🤠 🤡

I’m planning a significantly longer post in response to an ask I got ages ago all how I learned to draw the way I do, so lookout for that.

But in the meantime, here’s a couple things I can think of off the top of my head:

Specific tools don’t matter much. I currently use Procreate and would recommend it if you have an IPad. It’s an extremely simple but effective program.

On desktop, I use Clip Studio Pro, but Krita is another program I’ve used and liked AND it’s completely free.

I do also have loads of experience with Photoshop and other Adobe products but can’t recommend them at the price, not to mention they’re not super beginner friendly.

Hardware-wise, I almost exclusively use my IPad to draw because it’s so portable. I also have a Huion Kamvas pen tablet monitor that hooks up to my desktop. But I started doing digital art with a dinky lil Wacom tablet that was less than $100. There’s definitely a bit of a disconnect at first, not looking at where you’re drawing but rather on a screen, but you get used to it.

Bottom line is to use whatever tools are convenient and comfortable for you! I even know of a great artist that exclusively draws with their mouse. I realized I hated sitting at a desk and that stopped me from practicing digitally. I got an IPad and now it’s much easier for me to work comfortably on what I love.

Point two I’d like to make is take advantage of the capabilities of working digitally. This means using the godsent undo button to your heart’s content. Download fun brushes to play with and add texture. Use perspective grids. Turn on line stabilization so your strokes are extra smooth. Like what you’ve sketched so far but want to try something different? Duplicate the layer and work from there so you can go back to the old version if you change your mind. Radically change the colors or values with adjustment layers. Use clipping masks. Abuse the liquify tool.

A lot of this might sound like gobbledygook to a digital art beginner but just googling any of this terminology will get you loads of tutorials and information for your specific setup. Also I’m happy to go into details about specific digital art techniques I’ve picked up with over a decade and a half of experience.

Finally, and most importantly—make what you want to see in the world AND what feels good to make. This ofc is not exclusive to digital art, but I always want to stress this to new artists. I realized after I got into the DCA fandom that I had been letting shame, fear, and perfectionism keep me from creating the content I was really interested in making. But then man, idk. Frickin’ robot clowns amirite ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ it’s like there was a secret agent sent into my brain and he uploaded a DCA virus into my mainframe or smth idk hacker style. tktktktkt. they’re in.

Anyway. Hope this helps! Feel free to send another message if u have more questions :3

[loveroftoomanyfandoms]

Of Coffee and Cinnamon Rolls - Chapter 1

Pairing: TASM! Peter Parker x F!Reader

Rating: T

Story Summary: Peter's coffee maker has broken, leaving him in need of a caffeine fix. Luckily, there's a new coffee shop right by the Daily Bugle... With a beautiful barista inside.

Warnings/Tags: Meet-Cute, Coffee Shops, Strangers to Friends to Lovers

Word Count: ~1650

A/N: Continuing my reignited thirst for Andrew Garfield's Peter Parker with this super sweet, super fluffy goodness! Enjoy this first chapter and I'll be back with more soon!

That being said, if you want to be added to the tag list for this or any of my other stories/characters I write for, please let me know!

Ugh, what a morning, Peter Parker thought as he hurried down the sidewalk towards the Daily Bugle's building. His ancient second (or more than likely actually third) -hand coffee maker that he had purchased at Goodwill when he had first moved into his apartment had finally given up the ghost that morning and he hadn't had time to try to fix it before needing to leave for work. Mr. Jameson had eventually relented and hired him on as a staff photographer rather than a freelancer after the former staff photographer, Eddie Brock, had quit to go work for the Post, which meant that Peter was expected to attend the 7am staff meetings.

He slowed as he spotted a sidewalk sign up ahead welcoming people inside a brand-new coffee shop. 

Deciding that getting his caffeine fix was more important than potentially being late, Peter adjusted his backpack on his shoulder and headed inside, taking a quick glance around the empty shop.

The woman behind the counter smiled as he approached. "Hi, welcome to Bean There, Done That, what can I getcha?"

Wow, she's beautiful, Peter thought . "Hi, could I get a large black coffee?"

The beautiful barista nodded. "Room for cream or sugar?"

"No, thank you."

"Can I interest you in a cinnamon roll?"

Peter's stomach growled as he eyed the display case of what appeared to be freshly-baked cinnamon rolls. In his haste to clean up the mess his now-broken coffee maker had made he hadn't had time for breakfast. "Uh, yeah, actually, a cinnamon roll sounds great."

"Awesome." The barista tapped at the iPad that was serving as the register. "For here or to go?"

"To go." As much as Peter would've liked to stay and enjoy his breakfast he was already cutting it close.

"Okay, that'll be $6.43. Can I get your name?"

Peter must've looked confused because she pointed to the stack of paper coffee cups and added, "for your coffee order."

"Oh! Peter... My name is Peter."

"Peter," the beautiful barista (or B.B. as Peter was now calling her in his head) repeated, tapping at the iPad again. "Your coffee will be ready at the end of the counter."

Peter paid for his breakfast and moved to the other end of the counter, watching as B.B. set his coffee to brew then moved to the display case. She appeared to be roughly his age, with Y/H/C hair and Y/E/C eyes. She wore black pants, a white shirt, and a flour-dusted apron which bore the logo of the shop and showed off her figure.

"Here you go," she said, walking back towards Peter and handing him a small bakery box. "Cinnamon roll for Peter."

"Thank you."

She put a lid on Peter's coffee and slid it over to him. "And here's your coffee."

Peter picked up his coffee and bakery box as the bell above the door chimed, signaling another customer. "Thanks again."

"No problem. Thanks for stopping by, come back again soon."

"Will do."

Peter ran the rest of the way to the Daily Bugle. Luckily Jameson was running late so Peter managed to slip into the conference room with a couple of minutes to spare.

He opened the bakery box and took a bite of the still-warm cinnamon roll. Wow, this is delicious.

He finished it right before Jameson walked into the conference room.

"Alright, let's get this show on the road," Jameson barked.  "We need a puff piece to round out Sunday's edition. Whaddya got for me?"

"The library is having a book sale--" one of the junior reporters began.

"Boring, nobody goes to the library. What else?"

"There's a pet adoption event in Central Park--" another one tried.

"We covered the last one. Gimmie something different."

Peter cleared his throat. "There's a new coffee shop down the street that's having a grand opening tomorrow… Bean There, Done That?"

"New coffee shop, huh? Is it any good?"

Peter nodded. "Yes, sir. I just had a cinnamon roll from there. It was great."

Jameson thought for a moment. "Might get some free baked goods for promoting it. Ok, fine. Brant!"

"Yes, sir," Betty Brant, one of the senior reporters, replied.

"Set up an interview with the owner. Parker, you go too since we need photos of the opening."

Peter grinned. "Yes, sir." Hopefully B.B. will be there.

"Alright, now get out of here. I've got golf with the mayor in an hour and I need to practice my back swing."

Peter headed to his desk to work on editing photos for the online edition of the paper, briefly stopping to eat lunch in the staff break room before getting back to it. As he was packing up to leave for the day Betty stopped by his desk. "Hey, so I stopped by that coffee shop during my lunch break and talked to the owner, and she agreed to an interview but asked if it could be before the shop opens, so I'll see you tomorrow morning around 7:30?" 

Peter nodded. "Sounds good."

"Oh and you were right, the cinnamon rolls are excellent. I can't wait to try some other stuff from there."

"Me either. See you tomorrow, Betty."

He grabbed his backpack and headed down to the lobby.

"Bye, Stan!" he called to the elderly security guard as he exited the building.

As he approached Bean There, Done That he noticed that the chalkboard sign was still outside. Maybe I should stop in and get another coffee and cinnamon roll since it's gonna be a long night. And if B.B. happens to still be there, well, that's just a bonus, isn't it?

B.B. looked up from the tray of cinnamon rolls that she was boxing up as he entered. She smiled. "Hi, back again? It's Peter, right?"

Peter nodded. "Right."

"What can I do for you?"

"Um, actually I was wondering if I could get another coffee and a cinnamon roll."

B.B. nodded. "You're in luck. I'm getting ready to close up so I was boxing up the few I have left."

She moved over to the coffee machine. "Large black coffee, right?"

Peter nodded, impressed that she had remembered his order from that morning. "Right."

"Ok, I'll have that for you in a sec."

Peter waited at the register while B.B. brewed his coffee. "So, uh, first day open?" he asked.

B.B. glanced over at him. "Yeah, sorta. Technically tomorrow's our official opening but I decided to go ahead and open for a couple of hours today."

She popped the lid on and set it in front of him, then grabbed the box of cinnamon rolls, waving off Peter's payment. "Here you go. On the house."

Peter blinked in surprise. "Oh, wow, thanks. Are you sure though? I wouldn't want you to get into trouble with the owner."

B.B. grinned. "Considering I am the owner, I don't think I'll get into trouble for giving away free stuff. Besides, you're my first repeat customer, so that should at least entitle you to a free coffee and bakery item, right?"

"You're the owner," Peter repeated, suddenly feeling dumb considering how obvious it was. 

B.B. nodded. "Yep. I couldn't sleep last night, and when I can't sleep, I bake, hence the cinnamon rolls, so I figured it was better to open for a few hours a day early and sell them rather than have to throw them out because I can't eat them all." 

She stuck out her hand. "I'm Y/F/N. Y/F/N Y/L/N."

Peter took it, giving it a brief shake. "Peter Parker."

"Very nice to meet you, Peter Parker."

"Nice to meet you as well, Y/N." Peter enjoyed the way her name felt on his tongue.

"Thanks for stopping by again. Hope to see you again soon."

Peter grinned. "Actually, you'll be seeing me tomorrow morning. I'm the staff photographer for the Daily Bugle so I'll be taking photos for the paper during your interview."

A look of realization flitted across Y/N's face. "Ohhh, that makes sense now. That reporter from the Bugle did say that one of her colleagues had stopped by this morning and recommended that she try the cinnamon rolls."

Peter chuckled and rubbed the back of his neck nervously. "Yeah, that was me."

"Well thank you for recommending them to your colleagues. I really appreciate it."

"It was no problem, really. The cinnamon roll was excellent." Peter gestured to the bakery box. "Well, I mean obviously, since I'm back for another one." Not because you're beautiful and I just wanted to see you again, he thought. Well… not only that.

He took a sip of his coffee. "So I'll see you tomorrow, then?"

Y/N smiled. "Yeah, I guess you will."

Peter picked up the bakery box. "Thanks again for the coffee and cinnamon rolls. I really appreciate it."

"It's no problem."

Peter turned to leave.

"Oh, hey, wait!" Y/N added.

Peter turned back towards her.

Y/N bit her lip, then picked up a business card from the holder in front of the register and wrote something on the back before handing it to Peter. 

Peter studied the card.

Bean There, Done That

714 2nd Ave.

New York, NY 10016

(646)-555-2390

www.btdt.com

He turned it over and saw an additional phone number written on the back. 

"If no one's up front when you get here tomorrow morning you can text me and I'll come let you in," Y/N explained.

Peter put the card in his wallet for safekeeping, making a mental note to add Y/N's contact info to his phone as soon as he left the shop. "That sounds great."

"See you tomorrow, Peter."

"See ya, Y/N."

Peter left the shop with a grin. Maybe my coffee maker breaking wasn't such a bad thing after all. 

[otaku553]

How goes the fma x albedo fic? I hope that doesn't sound pushy, I'm genuinely curious. And in that vein, do you have any little drabbles you may have written or want to write? Especially with your recent kny ocs/yourself and your siblings. That'd be super fun to read about! Your art AND your writing is so freaking good, the moment I see you've posted something new on your blog I'm clicking it so fast. Same with your ao3 account ❤️

Thank you for the kind words!!! Currently not working on any fics, since I just came out of 10 weeks of summer research where my days began at 8 am and ended at 9 pm for probably less than minimum wage hahaha (doing research is a Bit Sad but I get a whole month to relax before classes start again so thank goodness for that)

I do however!!! Have a lot of plans!!! If you’re interested you can read more below!

Plans include but are not limited to:

Finally working on Homuncular Nature again!! I definitely do have a lot of plans and cool scenes playing out in my head for the next chapter, it’ll just come down to when I actually put pen to paper (or stylus to iPad) to actually organize and write them all. The road block I think is that I have seen neither Albedo nor fmab very recently and all my concrete ideas are for around the 30 episode mark for fmab, the turning point with the first actual confrontation against father and the subsequent Briggs arc.

Rewriting Ten Thousand Maple Leaves! A lot of people have been very kind but I think I missed the mark with my first chapter to be honest. My writing has gotten a lot wordier and less succinct, which feels like I’m filling a chapter more with fluff and unnecessary description than actual content. I think I also dislike how I characterized Sanemi and how quickly Kazuha was willing to agree with things. Writing both of them is kind of a difficult challenge tbh! I think in rewriting it I want to give back to Kazuha more of his vagrant role in the games, where he is avoiding the law for reasons somewhat out of his control.

Ebisu siblings content! I think it might be fun to try having them interact with more of the canon characters in kny but I also think there’s some value in a complete sort of outsider point of view when inserting characters into a piece of media. I feel like whenever I see self inserts I see a lot of ocs making themselves indispensable and making meaningful relationships with existing characters that way and that’s totally valid! That’s a lot of what I do for crossovers as well. I think when it comes to my own ocs though, I want them to feel grounded in some form and the reality of it is that none of the characters I make based on myself or real people are that impressive or remarkable. But I also think there’s a lot of value in showing smaller scale things outside of the main interactions and plot to show that even though we aren’t remarkable, we still have our own meaningful connections and ideologies and stories :) in the end the Ebisu siblings are a lot more visual though so I may just continue making doodles and art without writing anything haha

Kirby & Meta Knight ageswap AU: I was mostly doing this on my ask-gikabi sideblog in short form comics, but I lost sight of what I wanted to do after making the discord and starting to interact with some of the people who followed it. I think a lot of people are inspired and have their own very cool ideas that I wanted to take into account but then eventually it was no longer my story or the story I wanted to tell, which is why I’m thinking of restarting it as a fic. This one is still in very rough idea stage though, I have honestly no clue how I’m even going to begin organizing it

Yanfei ace attorney crossover: this one’s just pure crack lmao I would definitely write it as crack taken seriously but I think this is fun to explore just for small ideas that pop up every now and then, i.e. yanfei is semi-immortal because she’s half adeptus so it would be Really Funny to me if she showed up in dgs era, got her attorney’s license, went into hiding after it became obvious that she wasn’t aging, and then re-emerged after rebranding herself as her own daughter or granddaughter. That, and I have a lot of fun imagining someone as pragmatic as yanfei trying to get through the sheer chaos of aa despite being otherworldly

Continuing winter weather advisory: I got to a really good point in that fic and was rereading it today like,,, damn I wrote that? And it would be fun to see where I planned on going with it so I do want to also try working on that a bit if I can

Kazuha & Kunikuzushi role swap au: this is something I posted about a Long While ago but it’s an idea I continue to be fascinated with :) I especially enjoy how these two characters could have had completely different roles and personalities depending on how their pasts happened (with wanderer being so nice and turning so bitter and kazuha growing up so spoiled (for lack of a better word) and turning out so weary and yet kind

Link click and mha crossover: this one is honestly just a very recent idea but I think it would be fun to make a drabble on how lightime photo studio would be able to continue operating even in another world and the trouble they might get into for illegal quirk usage and what using cheng xiaoshi’s powers in a world where being able to tell the future is canonically possible would entail

I have!! So many ideas!! And not enough time or motivation to actually write any of them most of the time :’)

But I’m very glad to hear that you enjoy them and look forward to my posts!! :D I really hope I can work on some of these over the last month of summer vacation that I have :)

[mellohd]

after 7 years i finally drew fallout fanart. kinda, i drew preston like one time in 6th grade as like a "chibi" thing but i dont think iever posted it so it only exists on my dads ipad somewhere three hours away. its unfinished but um anyways preston was my favorite since i first started playing, probably because he was like the first companion you could have besides codsworth. so is dog meat, i have a mod so i can have them both and its cool hearing prestons dogmeat lines and they're both my gavorite and omg 😭

ive stricken again, a crossover of fo4 and co4 now exists and im now adding preston and dog meat to my giant crossover au im working on also thats like my favorite expression to draw david in loll same with my oc

[veronicaphoenix]

Despite my shock, I wrapped my arms around her, holding her against my chest, her sobs being muffled by the fabric of my hoodie, her tears staining it. “I never wanted you to do this to me, to make me feel these things for you,” she cried. “I’ve seen people around me, I’ve seen how it goes, I’ve lived it on my own skin… and it never ends well.”

Chapter tags & trigger warnings: Talks of mental health, mentions of sex, angst/hurt, confessions. | Word count: 2k | Cross posted on AO3.| Series masterpost. ✧.*

General trigger warnings: This work addresses and depicts issues related to addiction and violence, contains explicit sexual content, and explores themes of childhood trauma. Reader discretion is advised.

I didn’t expect her to come and apologize the next morning.

She didn’t. 

As the last day on the road unfolded, Lia moved through the tour obligations deliberately avoiding me. We caught each other’s eye a couple of times, and I tried to at least signal to her that I was reaching my limits, but she remained elusive. My frustration grew with each passing encounter that we had in the hotel and then in the venue where we were playing that night. 

After the final notes of the music faded away and the crowd’s cheers had dimmed, I retreated backstage. I skipped the quick gathering of the team to celebrate the tour’s success. I couldn’t muster the enthusiasm to join them, and I guess my anger had been visible on stage. 

I went straight for a shower once the show was finished, letting the water wash away the physical and emotional residue of the performance, and changed into comfortable clothes. 

An hour later, as the backstage bustled with the dismantling of the equipment and the loading of the truck, in a narrow hallway I crossed paths with Lia again. My patience had grown thin, and this time I was going to take matters into my own hands. 

I called her name, my voice echoing in the tunnel, straight and hard. Lia stopped and lifted her eyes from the iPad’s screen she was holding in both hands. She had been a mess all day, the consequences of last night’s events showing off in her face, in her eyes, but if she was one thing, that was resilient, and no matter how fucked up she was, she always managed to keep going and get her work done. It was admirable, in all honestly, but when it came to us… She was lost and helpless. 

“We have to talk.”

“I’m busy right now.”

Her eyes dropped back to the iPad and she started moving. Before she could disappear from my sight again, I raised my voice. 

“We have to talk and we’re gonna talk right now,” I declared, catching her attention. “So come here before I lose my fucking patience.”

She hesitated, her shoulders slumping as if my words had triggered something within her. She resisted, but she knew it wasn’t convenient for her to see me losing my shit. She reluctantly approached me, and I gestured towards the green room, now mostly empty. She walked past me as if I wasn’t there. The air in the room crackled with tension as Iclosed the door behind us.

“Okay,” she said, breaking the silence and setting the iPad on the table. She walked to the sofa and reclined herself on the back of it, crossing her arms over her chest in a defensive posture. As I scanned her eyes I detected a hint of insecurity and fear that she was trying to mask with an air of overconfidence. “Go on. What do you want to talk about?”

I took a deep breath, steeling myself for the conversation that we should’ve had a long time ago. 

“Maybe we can start with the fact that you do remember everything that happened that night.” 

“What night?”

I couldn’t contain my frustration. 

“For God’s sake,” I was tempted to raise my arms into the sky. She was as infuriating as she was beautiful. “The night we fucked, Lia! You’ve been excusing yourself with that cheap story about not remembering anything, but you do! You remember every fucking detail,” I emphasized each word, letting the weight of my emotions settle.  

I watched as her cheeks reddened, a sign that my words had struck a nerve. She stood frozen in place, letting her arms fall to her sides. The air in the room crackled with the tension that had been building for weeks, and I knew that this time we were going to settle it down, for better or for worse.

“Okay, yes. I do remember!”

That was something. I let out a silent breath, grateful for the honesty. I had spent the whole night with her voice in my head, the way she had said those things to me the night before.  

“And what the hell do you want me to do with that?” She retorted. “Shout it from the rooftops, write a book, maybe?”

I shook my head, trying to convey what I wanted to say. 

“It’s not about that. It’s about the fact that we could have talked about it, about you and me, and you didn’t give me a single chance.”

“We did talk the morning after, Noah. I told you everything there was to say. Why are you so stuck with the idea that we need to talk? What is it that you have to tell me? Because surely there has to be something if you’re so insistent.” 

“I never wanted to lose you.” Desperation laced my words.

“I’ve heard that before.” 

“Don’t be so damn condescending, Lia. Not with me. What happened wasn’t just my fault. It was yours, too,” I countered. 

“Yeah, we were both drunk, and it happened. That’s it. You told me to pretend it didn’t happen. Okay. I’m coming to terms with it, and you said it wasn’t like it meant anything, so—”

“That’s not what I said,” I interjected. 

“Well, it is what it was, then. It didn’t mean anything, and now you want—”

“Of course it meant something!” I exclaimed, my honesty catching her off guard. She looked frustrated, unprepared for the raw emotions I was laying bare. 

“Look, Noah. I don’t know where you’re trying to get, but I’m paying for my mistakes, all right? So don’t worry.”

“Of course I worry. Fuck! That’s all I do! Worry about you! I’ve been worried about you since we were kids, and now just because we had drunk sex, we’re supposed to throw everything out of the window?” My voice rose with desperation, and that desperation traveled to her.

“Then, stop! Just stop worrying about me! Stop thinking of me!”

“I can’t! Don’t you understand?! I can’t get you out of my head! And I need you to be here with me! I can’t stand the fucking thought of this life without you!”

The confession spilled out of me in broken pieces. 

“You need to make that stop,”she said after a few seconds, lowering her voice, struggling to keep her composure and emotions. I could feel her heart shattering. I knew it was. 

“Why should I? Because you’re really willing to give me up? Because you think you’re going to be okay without me?” She knew I wasn’t talking about her agency as an independent woman. I was talking about us as the soulmates we were. 

“I can try,” she replied, her voice a fragile promise. 

“Bullshit,” I answered back, straightening up and fixing my hard gaze on her. I took two steps towards where she was standing. “You and I both know you don’t want that. So what is it? What is it, Lia? What’s that that scares you so much? And why? Why are you scared? And don’t give me that crap about jeopardizing our relationship, and don’t bring up the promise. Don’t you dare. We were just kids.” 

“No, we weren’t. I was serious.”

So, she was still clinging to that. Why?

“Is that from where this is coming? The promise?” I asked, rising an eyebrow. 

Her eyes were watering, the memories of our childhood, our struggles, the pain inflicted on her by her mother and then by the man she thought loved her. Everything was rushing to her mind, and her heart wasn’t taking it. 

“Answer me, Lia.”

“No.”

“Yes, right now. I’m not letting you go. So be honest with me. Give me something, a reaction, scream, hit me. Do whatever you need but tell me why the fuck you’re so scared before I lose my fucking mind and—“

“Okay, you want me to be honest?” She straightened up, too, and I could finally see a resolve in her eyes. However, nothing would have prepared me for what she said next. “I’m in love with you!” She shouted. “I’m fucking in love with you and I don’t want to be!”

She cracked. 

Tears started streaming down her face as she pushed me, my limp body stumbling backward. 

Despite my shock, I wrapped my arms around her, holding her against my chest, her sobs being muffled by the fabric of my hoodie, her tears staining it. “I never wanted you to do this to me, to make me feel these things for you,” she cried. “I’ve seen people around me, I’ve seen how it goes, I’ve lived it on my own skin… and it never ends well.”

“Lia…” I whispered, trying to bring myself back to my senses. The words came out of me as if on autopilot. Everything that had been simmering inside of me the past weeks had now come to an end, only to be replaced by the realization that Lia was trapped in the same whirlwind of feelings I was. “It doesn’t have to be like that with us. We’re different and… I’m not like him. You know that.”

I couldn’t get a hold on myself. My arms were holding her, but I felt I was floating. 

“This is so fucked up…” She whimpered.

Then, she struggled to remove herself from me, trying to get a grip on herself. She cleaned her eyes and nose with the back of her arm, and her watery eyes looked at me as if this was the moment in which she lost all hope. 

“What am I supposed to do now?” Her voice trembled. 

“We’re going to find it out together.”

“What do you mean?” She interrupted, her tearful eyes searching mine. 

“If we… We could give it a chance.”

My words hung in the air. I could see her trying to process them, her emotions flickering across her face. Before I could gather the courage to elaborate, she stepped further back, shaking her head.

“I can’t risk it further than this, Noah. I’d rather have you like this, as fucked up as we are right now, than try something that could destroy us forever.”

“We’re not fucked up,” I ushered to correct her. “We’re just two kids that grew up, and all those ideas and perspectives we had of the future got shattered. That doesn’t mean that we’re fucked and that we don’t stand a chance. We’ve been there for each other since the beginning. It makes sense that we…”

That we fell in love. 

Lia’s head continued to sway, her internal struggle evident. This time, however, she approached, placing her hands on my chest with a soft touch. I wanted to drown in her scent and hold her, but I didn’t. I kept my arms at my sides as she looked up at me, her eyes red, the dark circles under them proof of her sleepless nights. Her cheeks were stained with the remnants of tears, and the silent communication between us seemed to speak more than we did.

The room held its breath as Lia and I stood there, suspended in a moment of realization. 

“You’re the most important person in my life and I might be in love with you,” she said. I still couldn’t process the magnitude of her words. “But I rather see the world on fire that putting all those years, our history, at stake. I’m capable of damaging everything and everyone around me because I don’t know how to handle my emotions, but I’m not damaging us any further than this.” 

With those words, she pulled away, leaving me reaching out for her touch, her warmth, her whole being. The emptiness she left behind was palpable, and for a moment, I stood there, grappling with the echoes of her honesty. 

I let her go because I knew that was a battle I wouldn’t win that day.

As she retreated, the door closed gently, sealing myself and my own feelings within the confines of the room. I spotted her iPad abandoned on the table, and I felt just the same: abandoned despite the sort of comforting warmth spreading through my chest at the knowledge that Lia had fallen for me.

[captain-rickbond]

I have actually several questions if you don't mind? :') (they're mostly about rickbond though, don't worry!) what's an AU and/or trope which suits you for ben and larry the most? coffee shop AU, enemies to lovers, university AU...? who out of those two is more likely to be the household cook? who's more likely to confess they like the other first? or do they do it at the same time? who's the golden retriever and who's the black cat in the relationship? what's an event/activity larry would try and force ben into? and what would be something ben would make larry do? And my final questions are for you and your art and writing specifically: what's a fic you would like to write/are currently writing, but can't seem to finish? do you have any WIPs that you wouldn't mind sharing bits and pieces of? :> when and where do you usually create your drawings? Love your work, I hope you're having a good day! ^^

Hi! okay, here we go:

Favourite AU/trope?

I wrote a coffee shop AU, assassins/hitmen AU and I'm writing three more: bar/pub AU, traumatic as hell AU, and post apocalyptic dystopian world AU (yes, you read that right) - one thing in common for all this stories - awkward first meeting and… friends to lovers? And basically idiots in love trope

Household cook?

Let me answer this way - in one of my wips Laz tries to open a can with a fork and cuts his finger, so…

Who's more likely to confess first?

It seems obvious - Laz is the one to make the first move- wait, now when I actually think about it, it's Ben (in my fics) that's almost always seems to snap first

Golden retriever/black cat?

Laz is the golden retriever, Ben is the cat

Event/activity one would force the other into?

Laz would make Ben attend a cosplay event, they both would be dressed as stormtroopers so no one would know it's them. (I definitely have not started on a drawing with them as stormtroopers…)

Ben would make Larry throw away all of his lego sets boxes bc they clutter the space and-

"Laz, have you actually deassembled any of this and put it back into a box? Like ever? Because if not, we're throwing it all awa-"

"-but-"

"-this way we're gonna have more space for new sets."

"…"

"…"

"Okay."

What I am currently writing?

I have 11 wips, and I would love to finish ANY of them… some are too short, some are way too long. There are funny ones (I hope), and hot ones. Every story has an unhealthy amount of angst, and one is sad as hell

When and where do I draw?

I draw at night, I don't really have time during the day. I take my ipad to bed, snuggle in with my cat, put some music on (I can't be left alone with my thoughts) and I draw until I hear my neighbour slam the door outside - every day at 4am - and then I go to sleep and wake up at 8 to go to work

A fragment of my crazy rickbond post apocalyptic dystopian world AU wip ↴

“Hey.”

Larry looked up, yanking out the cloth stuck behind the waistband of his pants, and wiping his greasy hands on it.

“…”

“Well, hello Ben! How was your day? Have you killed someone over a piece of junk again, today?”

Larry rolled his eyes and placed his hand on the seat of the bike, pushing himself off the ground with a huff.

“What you want?”

“A bit of tenderness?”

“Don’t we all?” Larry whispered under his breath and threw the cloth on the ground. “You got something for me?”

Ben sent him a small smile and pulled out a rusty bit of metal from behind his back.

“Happy birthday.” He waved his hand in front of Larry’s face.

“It’s not my birthday.” The younger man grumbled and snatched the part from Ben’s hand.

“Every day is your birthday when you get gifts like that,” Larry sighed and placed the part on the seat of the bike. “and you didn’t tell me when your birthday is, so I’m gonna celebrate it every day.”

“Are you done? I’ve got work to do.”

“Oh… come on,” Ben chuckled. “I know it’s all fucked up but at least we can laugh about it, right?”

Larry looked up and frowned.

“Right…”

Ben walked over and sat on a wooden crate, placing his elbows on his knees and releasing a deep sigh.

Okay, so is he planning on just sitting here?

“Don’t you have somewhere to be?”

Ben raised his head and smiled sadly.

“Not really.”

Okay, great.

The bike Larry was working on was actually his for once. He was grounded. All because of the damaged needle valve - small piece of shit that you can’t actually fix. You have to get a new one to even start the fucking engine.

Larry made a promise to himself.

Once he’ll get one, he will leave.

“Can you go be annoying somewhere else?” Larry dropped to his knees and fidgeted with one of the cables sticking out from behind the seat of the bike.

“You’re being mean, I thought you're a nice guy,” Ben sounded defeated. “aren’t you?”

“No,” Larry muttered. “I’m not.”

...

───

this may be the weirdest thing I’ve ever written, blame the Mad Max movies