#introversion needs recharge time people

[granolagaeilgeoir]

"but you're so warm and friendly to people, you can't be an introvert!"

That's not how that works. I am not a little ray of sunshine, I am a battery-powered flashlight that's very bright but dies out when kept on for too long. Big difference

[astrogossipp]

mercury notes. 💅🏻

Disclaimer. these observations do not have to resonate with everyone and everything, all expressed in this post is based on personal experience and research.

masterlist🍡

mercury signs and their characteristics 🍭

🫧 aries mercury

You're blunt and direct because you deeply care about your loved ones and want what's best for them, even if it initially hurts. You're a reliable friend who values mental stimulation over constant chatter. You're quick-witted and passionate, often diving into new interests headfirst, even if you haven't mastered them yet. Challenges excite you, and you prefer things that make you think hard. You can get obsessed until you figure something out, and once you do, you stick with it. However, you might get competitive or jealous when others are better at something you're passionate about. Plus, all that thinking can give you headaches. But ultimately, your bluntness stems from a place of caring, and your loyalty and agility of mind make you a valuable friend.

🫧 taurus mercury

Your laidback nature stems from your focus on what truly matters to you. You're guarded because you've learned to prioritize your goals and rely only on yourself, leading to a preference for a small, trustworthy circle. While emotional, your rationality guides you to offer practical advice sought by many. When you love, you do so intensely, either fully invested or not at all, which can leave you drained in communication and occasionally introverted, causing concern among others. You're honest and direct, with an appreciation for the beauty of words, possibly drawn to poetry. In youth, you might have easily developed crushes and possess a melodious voice, possibly skilled in singing. With Taurus Mercury, your communication style is stable and methodical, marked by a reserved demeanor and a tendency to carefully analyze your thoughts and opinions. While you may appear stubborn, others view you as thoughtful and reliable due to your grounded approach to communication.

🫧 gemini mercury

With your mind always buzzing, you might need to work on organizing to avoid getting overwhelmed easily. You're a sponge for information, possibly even having some psychic intuition. Your ability to grasp concepts quickly lets you talk your way through things effortlessly, even if you haven't fully digested them. People trust whatever you say, even if it's random, thanks to your charm. Your hunger for knowledge keeps you everywhere, possibly juggling multiple social media accounts or interests, making you intriguing yet hard to pin down. From a young age, you displayed advanced intellect, impressing others with your wisdom beyond years. However, your thirst for new knowledge can lead to forgetting old ones, making exams a struggle unless you study hard. Despite this, you're generous and respectful, always open to communication, which earns you many acquaintances but perhaps few deep emotional bonds, leaving you somewhat detached. You're expressive, likely talking with your hands and body to drive your point home. With a Gemini Mercury, you're curious and talkative, overflowing with ideas and a penchant for witty, sarcastic communication. You enjoy delving into topics deeply and playfully, often expressing yourself through clever wordplay and puns.

🫧 cancer mercury

Cancer Mercuries are often misunderstood due to the crybaby stereotype, but they're much more than that. They have a knack for sensing emotions, especially in their loved ones, and their words carry a depth that reflects their own experiences and wounds. They have a remarkable memory for emotional moments, often recalling cringey or painful events vividly while forgetting trivial details easily. These folks lean towards introversion and need plenty of alone time to recharge, thriving best among their loved ones. Clear communication is crucial with them as they can sense insincerity. Despite their emotional nature, they keep their feelings guarded and may use self-deprecating humor to deflect. Once they trust you, though, they're fiercely loyal and offer comfort and support with their words. With a Cancer Mercury, communication is deeply compassionate and intuitive, rooted in empathy and a desire to nurture and support others. They express themselves poetically and creatively, understanding others' pain and offering unwavering support.

🫧 leo mercury

Individuals with Leo Mercury express their love and affection through communication, showing warmth and making others feel like instant best friends. They can get obsessive about their interests and crushes, giving them intense focus. In learning environments, they need joy and fun to stay engaged. They value actions over words, so if you claim to love them, you better show it. Their charming communication style attracts attention, but they must be mindful of what they say as people tend to magnify their words. They're prone to checking up on loved ones frequently, regardless of how much time has passed, as attention is their love language. However, a downside is their reluctance to consider others' viewpoints, often believing they're always right. With Leo Mercury, communication is energetic, confident, and direct, with a charismatic and engaging flair. They enjoy being the center of attention and aren't afraid to assert themselves, making them natural leaders in communication.

🫧 virgo mercury

Virgo Mercuries are like the champions of communication, always making sure their words are well put together and hard to argue against, reminiscent of those kids who constantly won spelling bees. They're high achievers from a young age, constantly seeking logic and truth in everything, which can lead them to get lost in details and feel overwhelmed. Even in chaos, they handle things maturely with logic, earning them the reputation of wise advisors. However, their attention to detail can lead to overthinking, as they scrutinize even the smallest actions and texts, making it hard to deceive them. Suspicious by nature, they'll do thorough research, even stalking if needed, to uncover the truth. They should trust themselves more and boost their self-confidence to overcome intrusive thoughts. With a Virgo Mercury, communication is analytical and critical, driven by a desire for perfection and precision. They analyze everything before speaking, taking a methodical and logical approach that can sometimes lead to overthinking. Patience and self-discipline are key for them to manage their overactive minds effectively.

🫧 libra mercury

Libra Mercuries thrive on peace and harmony in their daily lives, feeling unsettled when things are out of order. While they're adept at seeing both sides of a story, they can get lost in trying to maintain balance. However, they've learned it's okay to embrace chaos occasionally, especially since they easily get bored. Despite their indecisive nature, they possess objective intelligence, making them skilled at solving problems from different perspectives, which suits careers in law or similar fields. Yet, their desire for justice can lead to complicated situations due to their reluctance to choose sides. This indecision may strain friendships, although they can also be seen as loyal and reliable if positively manifested. They have a thirst for knowledge and are drawn to what stimulates their minds, enjoying romance books or shows and even finding amusement in chaotic situations, despite not being naturally chaotic themselves. A positively manifested Libra Mercury is a great friend to have, always supportive and having your back. In communication, they're charming and balanced, adept at friendly and diplomatic interactions. They enjoy engaging with others, keeping conversations light and positive, and prefer to avoid confrontation or conflict, prioritizing harmony and balance in their relationships.

🫧 scorpio mercury

Scorpio Mercuries are enigmatic and hard to decipher. They're private and move in silence, carefully displaying only what they want others to see to avoid suspicion. With high emotional intelligence and intense intuition, they can easily fall into destructive thought patterns, including intrusive or sexual thoughts, and fear being exposed. Despite their suspicion of others' intentions, they strive to maintain a high vibrational image. In love, they're fiercely loyal and keep secrets close, but they can be ruthless if wronged. They delve deeply into thoughts, even overanalyzing simple problems and pondering existential questions. Their intuition often reveals truths they'd rather not know, making hiding things from them futile. Obsessed with what stimulates them, they can become stubborn and refuse to let go of harmful things. They find meaning in everything, holding onto items or information they believe will be useful. While loyal, they keep themselves guarded, trusting only themselves. Others may find them intimidating or blunt, and they enjoy playing with power due to their ability to easily gain trust. A Scorpio Mercury communicates sensitively and perceptively, reading into hidden meanings and subtext. They tend to keep their thoughts and feelings to themselves, balancing expression with restraint. They possess strong intuition and mental energy but may struggle with overthinking.

🫧 sagittarius mercury

Individuals with Sagittarius Mercury are warm and nonjudgmental, making others feel at home and giving them the best time of their lives. They're open-minded and objective, often surprising people with their vast knowledge and random facts, although they may feel insecure about their intelligence. They tend to see the best in everyone and can easily be taken advantage of due to their desire to do the right thing. They're great listeners and offer wise, unbiased advice, drawing people to them for venting sessions. Growing up, they were likely interested in solving larger problems, but they can get stressed easily and lost in knowledge and details. They're open to new experiences and friends but are put off by judgmental or arrogant people. They have a playful sense of humor and enjoy sharing random facts with friends, but they don't like being told what to do and can be unreliable if they're not truly interested in something. Their attention span is short, making it difficult to focus, and meditation may be challenging due to their constantly active minds. With Sagittarius Mercury, communication is playful and positive, marked by quick wit, humor, and a talent for uplifting conversations. They bring a bright and lively energy to any interaction, making people laugh and bringing joy to any situation.

🫧 capricorn mercury

Capricorn Mercuries are reserved and only share what's necessary, commanding respect with their directness, which can sometimes be mistaken for rudeness. They avoid drama and focus on their own pursuits, maintaining a private and reserved demeanor. Their knowledge comes from life experiences and karma, often shaped by past struggles and moments of loneliness. While typically kind, they have clear boundaries and won't hesitate to assert themselves when pushed too far. They're calculated and loyal, often taking on a protective role, especially with siblings. With a mature outlook on life, they exude old soul vibes and may seem like natural teachers. They excel at planning and methodical tasks, dedicating themselves fully to their responsibilities. Despite being social, they prioritize duty and future success over socializing, often retreating to recharge. They value trustworthiness and responsibility in others but have little tolerance for foolishness. Communication for Capricorn Mercuries is pragmatic and logical, characterized by a clear and ordered approach. They prefer speaking with precision and clarity, often overthinking decisions and striving for perfection.

🫧 aquarius mercury

Aquarius Mercuries possess vivid imaginations and creative minds, often thinking far ahead but struggling with simple concepts. They may excel in unconventional roles while finding day-to-day tasks boring and easily becoming distracted. Despite being social, they struggle to open up and may feel neglected or misunderstood for their ideas. Their innovative nature draws admiration, but they may attract copycats without calling them out due to their kind demeanor. They have a random but fun sense of humor, often sending memes or random comfort items. Their accepting nature and detachment make them intriguing to others, who are drawn to their unique perspective and lack of judgment. They may be interested in the occult or unconventional topics. Getting to know them is a hit or miss, as they either click with someone completely or don't connect at all. Communication for Aquarius Mercuries is unique and inventive, characterized by creative and original thinking, often outside the box. They may get lost in their thoughts and should strive for more grounded and effective communication.

🫧 pisces mercury

Pisces Mercuries possess vast knowledge and ideas but may struggle with insecurity and seek validation. They have an old, wise soul, often knowing things intuitively and feeling deeply. They are sacrificial and generous, prone to being taken advantage of due to their kindness. In love, they may overlook red flags and defend their passions fervently. Drawn to beauty and gentleness, they have a creative sense of humor and may struggle with mundane tasks. Their relationships with siblings can be complex, ranging from intuitive understanding to manipulation. When expressing their darker side, they can be manipulative or prone to self-deception. Words of affirmation are important to them, as they have a vivid imagination but are often misunderstood. Pisces Mercuries approach communication intuitively and emotionally, valuing creativity and empathy but sometimes struggling with logic and detail.

this post was created by @astrogossipp on tumblr <3 if reposting my work please give credits.

pics by @vmstv

[thesargasmicgoddess]

I think I have a partial sense of how you might answer this, but I'd still like to ask: What's your preferred strategy for managing stress?

I'm not sure I just have one strategy, I have a toolbox of them. Over the years, my favorite tools may evolve, but I have to say that my best strategy is self-awareness.

Yes, I figured that most people here would have expected me to say orgasms or something of that sort 🤣 But to me, that falls into the bucket of self-awareness. If you aren't aware or cognizant of how what you need/what fills your cup/what drives you, then you can do all of the meditation, yoga, *insert generic relaxation activity here* and still not feel relaxed.

I know what I need to center myself. And that is built on a solid foundation of self-awareness and being willing to follow through on what that awareness is telling me.

In terms of the most important tools in my toolbox, I would say these are my top 5:

play (tapping into my whimsical/analytical/intellectual/creative/artistic/sexual passions😈)

physical wellness (sleep, eating clean, movement, sex/orgasms also falls into this category😉)

mental wellness (therapy, mindfulness, vulnerability, sleep again 🤣)

Authentic deep connections. I hate small talk.

Solitude and grace. I'm an introvert, so I absolutely give myself the grace to be alone. Society puts extroversion on a pedestal, whereas introversion gets pigeonholed with being shy/awkward/antisocial. This is a fallacy. I'm incredibly social, but I absolutely need uninterrupted alone time to recharge and blossom.

I've also learned to be ok with sitting with my stress. It's not comfortable but I know I will be ok. Stress is very much like anxiety, the anticipation of it is sometimes worse than the actual thing.

Thanks for this thoughtful question!

[jazzdacanay]

Being an introvert is completely normal. 

I once felt ashamed for being an introvert. Wanting to be like other people that have no problem with socializing. I wanted to have their social energy and be very outgoing. I am jealous of them for having so many friends and looking so happy. But now, I am starting to get used to it and realized that there’s nothing wrong with being an introvert. 

Throughout my life, I've been hearing a lot of “you’re so quiet” or forcing me to speak and that makes me feel self-conscious. Allow us to be silent at such moments because it's what we need to be comfortable. Yes, we consciously choose to avoid interacting with people. However, this doesn't make us antisocial; rather, it makes us selectively social. Introverts are usually more comfortable with their close friends, and we take a lot of time to get to befriend someone.  

I usually recharge myself by having quality time alone and focusing on my interests and hobbies. So, if you're an introvert, you can ease up knowing that you're normal. Accept your introversion, respect your needs, and look for ways to grow and flourish in your own genuine way. If you know someone who is an introvert, I hope that you don’t misunderstand them. 

[girlboss-enthusiast]

Do you ever have times where talking to people is just....so exhausting that you don't want to, even if you like them? It's not depression or illness or lack of sleep. It's not even introversion, bc I haven't done anything social for weeks, so no need to recharge the social battery. I'm just so tired of dealing with people and their expectations, and having to think about what I say or what I want to convey. The thought of trying to have a conversation or come up with a coherent response to someone, even via text, makes me want to cry and/or go to bed. Like it's mentally and physically distressing. I hate when this happens.

[entamewitchlulu]

i guess i kinda thought we were past this but i saw some silly video on my fb feed that was some generalized thing about "introverts vs extroverts" that depicted introverts as little babies who need to be kidnapped by their extrovert friends to go out where they will be miserable the whole time and i just like....that's not how this works. honestly, if you are that opposed to social interaction, that's not introversion, that's being shy/socially anxious, which aren't the same thing at all.

on the other hand, i also saw an inane take by someone on twitter claiming that introverts were all just too smart and intellectual to want to do small talk with "dumb" extroverts, whatever the fuck that means

Like, i'm pretty much an introvert. the only thing that means is that i recharge by being on my own. other than that it has very little actual say in my personality. I enjoy going out and seeing people and spending time with others. I enjoy meeting new people and having fun experiences out in the world. Small talk is, sure, a little awkward and tiring, but I can do it and even find enjoyment in it. I just have a limited energy level for doing those things and need to eventually go back and recharge with a book or a movie.

Extroverts on the other hand aren't just....idk, someone's idea of a vapid popular cheerleader. They're just people who get energized by being with other people. They enjoy doing alone time stuff too and are (obviously) also capable of being intelligent and having "deep" conversations. They just eventually tire out of doing things on their own and would like to be around people again.

And like, it's the same for me too!! it's not like introverts are some weird new species that could be alone forever. Even I get tired of being alone and want to be around people again!! It's not a weird perfect binary. all humans need a balance of alone time and time with others, and how much of each you would like to have isn't a personality trait

[findpenpalsover20]

Name/Nickname: King

Age: 35

Country: Australia

Some info about me: I always find it so hard to describe myself, I feel like there’s so many aspects to a person’s personality, so many different ‘sides’ of them. Alas, here goes: I’m a bit of a dork! I love reading, watching movies and tv shows, dabbling in writing here and there; I’m a MASSIVE introvert (INFJ, for those of you keeping score at home); and most deeply, I believe chivalry is NOT dead: I love being a gentleman, trying to be a gentleman, treating others with kindness, respect; I’m a bit of a softie, my heart is too big too handle sometimes. Ultra sensitive and one of those people that will hype you up and want to treat you like a princess/prince, simply because we’re friends - I have unconditional kindness and love for all you beautiful souls out there; I’m a home body, a lover of rain and the sounds it makes, and I don’t really have any real life friends. I love imagining I’m a knight or a prince, and writing as if I belong in another age. Apologies in advance for my ‘vintage’ / old school word choice and sentence structure. I’m a walking paradox, wanting both to share my heart with lots of people and wanting so many friends who I can build up and support, but also being so introverted that I want to just seclude myself in my room all day.

Interests: Collecting books, vinyls, blu-rays, video games, vhs’, all things unicorn; being so addicted / in love with Stardew Valley that I’m afraid to play it; finding the beauty all around me, in the small things, and being happy with the little I have, every single day, i.e. star gazing, walking around the park on a cold wintery day, walking with my toes in the sand on a summery afternoon.

Other random things I love are: Batman, red vines / twizzlers, Dr. Pepper, cheesecake, classic novels, historical fiction, mornings spent in my room listening to relaxing music and reading a book while it’s raining outside, basketball, chivalry

What I’m looking for: Friends, really. Any age, gender, location. Due to my introversion, I go through spells of being able to talk a lot, then having an ‘introvert hangover / introvert withdrawal’ where I disappear for a few days because I need to recharge my social batteries, so please, if you’re expecting to talk 24/7 then please know in advance: I can’t do that. I’m one of those people that WILL stick around, but i’ll be here in waves. I need friends who understand the struggle of being an introvert, and who won’t be offended when I don’t talk for a bit. I’d love to eventually send the occasional letter, postcard, but I don’t have the finances to send out 200 letters a year, haha. Ideally it would be an email correspondence, much like letter writing a few hundred years ago. Where I’ll have your letter sitting in my inbox, and when I have some time to relax after a busy day of work, I can go into my email and read your ‘electronic letter’ to me, and then sit in silence and peace, crafting my response. I would love to talk to someone who likes writing eloquently, (maybe we can even pretend we are Lords/ Ladies from neighbouring countries or towns, and talk about our lives in such a manner). If you do decide to wish to converse with me, please prepare for a lot of positivity and kindness.

How you can contact me: Send me an email to my email address, breatherofstardust @ gmail.com (without the spaces), and please include:

1) a little bit about you

2) why you want to write with me

3) and a photo / selfie, so I can see who I am speaking to :)

I won’t presume to assume that I’ll get loads of responses, but in the case that I do, I don’t think i’ll be able to take on too many correspondences - because those that I do take on, I want to give my full attentions to, you know? And having a job and regular life keeps one plenty busy :O And I understand also that not all correspondences work out, due to differing personalities, changing circumstances, or just simply not getting a long. And there’s nothing wrong with that! I don’t expect to get a long with everyone in the world :))

Either way, I look forward to hearing from you :) If anything (or lots) of what I have said has tickled your fancy, then here’s hoping you’ll appear in my inbox, in due time. Thank you for you reading!

With warmest regards,

Dom

[fairlyqualityanon]

Not particularly into vore or anything like that but I respect your interests.

The reason I am sending something is that I genuinely admire your non political stance here.

Politics have invaded hobbies so much that it makes me often no longer comfortable engaging with it.

Having politcs out of it from the get go is so extremely refreshing to see!

Hope you’re not receiving harassment over your views. Even if you do remember that you are better than them.

Not everything has to involve politics. Especially when it comes to fandom and anything escapist.

It’s called escapism for a reason after all.

🥺 Woke up from a nap and was squinting at this, wondering if I'd gotten my first hate mail in a couple years. This is beautiful, thank you, taking the time to send this made my day. ♥️

Yeah it's nuts. :( I'd gotten such vitriolic death and sexual violence messages back when I was RPing in the Transformers section of Tumblr, simply for having a (insert demographic here) character. I decided I'd nip that in the bud when setting up this blog and vehemently avoid politics; over the last decade I've had coworkers all across the political spectrum, my family has a complete 100% ban on talking politics, and it's just EXHAUSTING.

I refuse to get any more political than "voting is important!" because even THAT reminder can stress people out. Maybe I'm sticking my head in the sand but between severe introversion and Autism Panic I have several different batteries that need recharged. I figure some of my followers, readers, and randos that stumble across my stuff might be of similar mindset.

I miss the Tumblr extensions that had great blacklist features, my Blocked Users list is split between politics, porn/spam bots, and a few interpersonal issues.

.... I actually did get another politically charged ask shortly before posting this. 😂

[notjusthespongenextdoor]

most petty pet peeve imaginable but i legitimately can't stand when people call themselves ambiverts SKDJFHGJKDFG like "i love being around people but i need a lot of time to recharge afterwards!" that's introversion. that's what being an introvert is. like if you want to disregard the binary system of extrovert/introvert that's completely fine with me, any system of categorization like that is going to inherently be limiting but like. the definition of extrovert is someone who gets energy from being with people and the definition of introvert is someone who gets energy from being alone...so if you have to 'recharge' after being around people then...you're an introvert...........saying you're an ambivert just because you like being around people is a fundamental misunderstanding of what introversion means..................................

[dear-wormwoods]

Unpopular opinion: It’s fine if you don’t agree with me on this, but I personally think that Kyle is an ambivert. You probably already know this, but an ambivert is someone who both introverted and extroverted at the same time. I headcanon him to be energetic and social sometimes but then be on the quiet side other times.

Don’t worry, my opinion on this is probably even more unpopular. I feel like most people think he’s an introvert, or just go along with the reading of him as one because it’s popular, or because they don’t care enough about personality typing or cognitive functions to really care about it one way or another. I’m in the minority in that I think he’s an extrovert, an ENFJ more specifically. Google disagrees. Oh well.

I can see the ambivert angle. I prefer it to a straight introvert take, for sure. Speaking as a complete introvert myself… Kyle is not one. He’s just not the kind of kid who needs his battery recharged with alone time - in fact, he thrives in groups and crowds (that’s not to say he’s always very skilled at socializing, or that others always respond well to him, but he does get energy from interacting with others). He’s also not one for quiet introspection, because he generally uses his friends as sounding boards for his internal conflicts. Prime example: Crack Baby Athletic Association. He also gives speeches not just to convince others to see his side, but also as a way of working through issues outwardly, in real time, with an audience.

Even in this most recent episode, he needed socialization, like, desperately, in order to feel good about himself and his friends clearly know that about him. He’d probably deny it if asked, but he likes being the center of attention. He loves to be listened to and regarded as someone worthwhile, and he seeks the approval of others so much so, to the point where it could be considered a character flaw (though he did make progress on this in the last episode). And he really, really doesn’t like being alone. If he’s not interacting with his friends, he’s trying to hang out with Ike. He made a whole Twitter hashtag over the fact that his family stopped hanging out with him enough. In Post Covid he was living alone and clearly pretty miserable that way. He just… gets so much out of being around other people, y’know? I can relate to him in so many ways, but not this way lol.

Introversion/extroversion is really about where you get your energy from. In my opinion, Kyle gets it from being around others and being heard by them. An introvert would be exhausted by that and need alone time to recharge and refresh. Is there room for an interpretation where he can be one or the other depending on the day? Yeah, of course. So while I don’t agree with you entirely, I do get your reading of it more than I get the introvert takes. We can be unpopular together!

[embraceyourconfidence]

Confidence for Introverts

Challenges Introverts Face Regarding Confidence:

Social Anxiety: Introverts may experience social anxiety or discomfort in social situations, which can hinder their confidence in interacting with others.

Self-Doubt: Introverts often tend to overthink and doubt themselves, which can undermine their confidence in their abilities and decisions.

Preference for Solitude: While introverts recharge in solitude, societal expectations often favor extroverted behaviors, leading introverts to question their confidence in social settings.

Speaking Up: Introverts may struggle to speak up in groups or assert themselves, especially in environments dominated by extroverted personalities.

Strategies for Introverts to Build Confidence:

Know Your Strengths:

Identify and embrace your strengths as an introvert, such as deep listening skills, creativity, and thoughtful insights.

Set Realistic Goals:

Set small, achievable goals for stepping out of your comfort zone gradually. Celebrate your progress along the way.

Practice Self-Acceptance:

Accept yourself as you are, introversion and all. Recognize that being introverted is a valuable trait and doesn’t equate to lacking confidence.

Prepare Ahead:

Before social or challenging situations, prepare what you want to say or how you want to present yourself. Having a plan can boost confidence.

Focus on Quality Connections:

Instead of trying to be the life of the party, focus on building meaningful connections with a few people at a time. Quality over quantity.

Find Your Voice:

Practice speaking up in small group settings or one-on-one conversations. Start with expressing your opinions or ideas in low-pressure situations.

Take Breaks as Needed:

Honor your need for solitude and recharge time. Taking breaks when socializing becomes overwhelming can help maintain confidence levels.

[selectivechaos]

social anxiety vs introversion.

sincerely and utterly need you to stop equating social anxiety disorder with introversion. they are Not synonyms and in no context should they be used as synonyms.

quiz:

does introvert mean:

a- a person who prefers to spend time alone, but enjoys social situations and benefits from them. but also needs time to recharge their social battery afterwards.

or

b- a person who dreads social situations, dwelling on them before and/or after the event. having spikes of anxiety as well as long-lasting high levels of anxiety when in a social situation. struggling with cognitive distortions about how they are perceived, and having excessive and disproportionate fear of social judgement, humiliation, etc. such that it significantly interferes with their life.

end of quiz. pens down.

see a lot of people who consume content about ‘introverts’ because they relate to it. but actually maybe they would be better off if they understood and accepted that it is social anxiety and it is hurting them. problem is that when social anxiety symptoms are presented as simply ‘introversion’ with no reference to sad, then it depathologises it. it becomes something which people see as relatable and universal, so they undermine their own pain and struggles.

this is why they then find it hard to believe that:

no, not everyone assumes others hate them after every conversation.

and no, not everyone is sweating before they get on the bus.

no, not everyone is finding it hard to breathe in the classroom.

and no, not everyone is absolutely dreading the party.

🌹🌹

[rubyredstarbolt]

Unpopular Opinion: Leon S. Kennedy is an extrovert

So, this is just my opinion about Leon and it’s perfectly fine to have a different opinion, since there are many things that Capcom just leaves open for interpretation.

I know many fans say, Leon is an introvert. But… what exactly is that? Many say, introvert people are quiet or shy and like to be alone. But it is so much more than that! The main difference between introversion and extraversion is, how you recharge. After a long day at work, an introvert prefers to do something solitary or only with one or two people really (!) close to them and at home. When there’s no extra hassle involved. An extrovert person is the one that spends time with people outside, like at a bar or at a restaurant. That’s how extrovert people relax and unwind.

So, when we see Leon in the games or in the movies, it is always in high-pressure situations. He’s far from home, somewhere on a bioterrorism battlefield. Is he talkative? Hell, no. But you don’t need to be constantly blabbering to qualify as an extrovert. And only few people have solely introvert or extrovert traits.

So, what makes me say that I think he’s an extrovert? It’s the way he approaches people. It’s the way he’s seeking company after a mission.

In the OG RE4, he tells Mike (the chopper pilot) “When we get out of here, drinks are on me”. In RE: Infinite Darkness, he asks Shen May if she wants to grab dinner, when this is over and at the end of the mini-series is disappointed that Claire only came for the chip. “Thought you called, ‘cause you wanted to grab dinner.” (okay, Claire is a close friend, so that doesn’t really count). In RE: Damnation Leon says he had been looking forward to showing JD America (right before he has to shoot him :( ) and joked with Buddy about “[grabbing] a few beers”.

Those scenes happened all during missions (not counting the scene with Claire). Those are stressful. And the very last thing an introvert thinks about in stressful situations is to spend time with people afterward. But Leon is the one who is actively asking! And it’s mainly the latter that makes me think, that he’s an extrovert.

I can only draw from my own experiences and I am an introvert. When things get stressful at work or generally in life, you won’t see me asking to spend quality time. Mainly it’s my friends who ask about doing something together, anyway. And if they would ask me if I could grab dinner with them on that same day and I have no time to mentally prepare to go out? Most of the time I would say no. Sometimes I even withdraw and cancel plans with friends, even with very close ones, when I’m too  stressed out.

This is behavior I really don’t see in Leon. It’s quite the opposite, see my examples above.

Some could say “yeah, well, that’s because he’s really lonely.” But I have seen what happens to introverts who are lonely, I’ve seen it with a really introvert friend during the Corona pandemic. They withdraw even more.

So, no, I think Leon doesn’t really qualify to be an introvert.

[londonfoginacup]

Going off Harry and Louis' music it sounds like Louis is the one who likes his space. Isn't that what Satellite is about? Maybe they both like their space which is why they don't spend much time together and they have communication issues.

Hello friend or friends, I think that we are talking about two different things.

I, personally, am an extremely needy introvert. Introversion and extroversion are not describing whether we’re people-persons or not, they are instead about how we recharge our energy. Introverts run their social battery down by being with other people, whereas extroverts charge their social battery by being with other people.

I am an introvert who likes to spend a lot of time alone with my cats or doing silent parallel play with my besties, but I am also extremely needy and touchy-feely. @lululawrence can attest to this I am terribly in her personal space when we are together, even though we spend the majority of the time not touching. I am being demanding of her by playing with her hand or arm or hair while she’s trying to do important things like writing her big bang.

I don’t know if you’ve had the pleasure of seeing AOTV yet, but Louis is the one who chose to have a bunk along with the rest of his band, rather than creating a separate space for himself at the back of the bus. He’s the one who told his band members they’re always welcome in his dressing room, and the one constantly including them in every step of his process and day. He loves being around people and he loves being able to serve them and see them happy from it. Yeah, I’m sure he needs a bit of alone recharge time too, because he’s human, but I’m seeing a consistent desire to be with others.

That being said, what they talk about in their music I think is based around a lot of grief. Both of them have suffered the loss of many people in their lives in the time since they started writing solo music, and I’m sure that’s presented a lot of different situations. Because how we grieve is entirely different and unique and unrelated to intro/extroversion and how we are in our day-to-day otherwise. I do think there are a lot of signs that when Louis’ lost in his grief he runs away, physically and mentally. Changes his number to get away from people, even, as James said. I’m not as sure about Harry’s response to grief, my best guess is that he gets very lost in his head but he does seek out those close to him to be with/talk to about it (that could be the therapy).

So like, yes. I think you’re right and I think I’m right. I just think we’re talking about two different things.

[churutu]

You Should Be Proud of Being an Introvert

Photo by Cassie Boca on Unsplash

It’s Saturday night, and I’m home alone.

While the whole city around me is probably out partying, I’m in my room listening to my favorite lo-fi playlist on Spotify, snacking on some popcorn, and typing away on my computer — it might sound like a wasted Saturday night for most of you, but let me tell you, I couldn’t be more in my element.

Don’t get me wrong, I would go crazy if I never got out of my house, but in this stimuli-filled world, I can only stand so many hours of social interaction before I feel completely drained and need some me time to recharge my batteries. The same is true for university, for example: While I enjoy attending certain lectures and seminars, I still perform better on my exams if I’m able to prepare by myself, which is why the silence and calmness of my room are much appreciated. Even when it comes to work, I have no problem following orders, but most of the time I’m better off doing things on my own anyway.

I’ll just go ahead and say it, I’m an introvert.

As I write this, something feels off and the same question keeps on popping into my head: Why should I even have to convince people that being an introvert is a good thing?

The problem is, in Anaïs Nin’s words, that our culture made a virtue of living only as extroverts.

In today’s society, introversion is often seen as an undesirable trait. Even I myself, as an introvert, used to think that way. As a teenager you could often catch me staring at the extroverted kids, thinking, why can’t I be like that?

Luckily, that’s not the way I look at it anymore, and I’m here to tell you why you shouldn’t either. To be completely honest, I’m quite happy with the person I’m turning out to be, and I believe it was, to a great extent, my introverted self who made me the man I am today.

We think before we speak

I admit it, we don’t talk much, but is that really a bad thing?

As introverts, we usually feel less comfortable talking, so we take our time before we actually decide to do so. But think about it, if we’re not talking, that means we’re listening. If we’re not talking, that means we’re choosing the right words to properly express ourselves. If we’re not talking, that means we feel there’s nothing worth saying — we like to focus on quality, not quantity, so that when we do talk, we actually add value to the conversation.

My grandmother used to say that I rarely spoke during arguments, but when I did, it was like my words slapped everyone in the face.

Put differently, if you think before speaking, you can carefully pick and choose what you say, which then allows for your words to have a bigger impact. Now don’t get me wrong, talking a lot isn’t necessarily the problem,talking for talking’s sake is — or, as Stuart Wilde puts it in his book “Silent Power”:

“Most people talk too much, and what they do say is often just noise or irrelevant gibberish designed to keep themselves entertained.”

The ability to just shut up and listen allows us to do more than just thinking before speaking, though:

We make deep connections

Yes, our social circle is probably smaller than that of an extrovert, but remember, quality, not quantity.

I recently watched a TedTalk by Dr. Raj Persaud,”The Psychology of Seduction”, and out of the 16-minute talk, there was something that I found particularly interesting: Dr. Raj explains how there are three “phases” to a relationship — attention, interest, and maintenance. Apparently, extroverts are better at catching the interest and attention of a potential lover, introverted people, on the other hand, are better at maintaining the relationship.

While Dr. Raj’s seduction tips were probably developed with romantic relationships in mind, I think the theory applies to any type of connection between two human beings.

As introverts, we often have a harder time making friends, let alone flirting with someone we find attractive, but the few times we are able to take down that interest/attention barrier that extroverts can so effortlessly walk through, the bond we create is long-lasting and, dare I say, indestructible. Some of the closest people to me are childhood friends that I now rarely see, others I met randomly through life and hang out with almost daily — but regardless of the frequency with which we see each other, regardless of how, when or where we met, I know I can count on them at any time, for anything.

I can count these people on one hand, and I wouldn’t have it any other way — I don’t need, and to be honest don’t want, a bunch of mere acquaintances to hang out with every time I have nothing better to do:

We feel comfortable being alone

We’re not socially awkward, we’re not antisocial, we’re not lonely — but we’re comfortable even with no one’s company but our own.

Our society is pretty much built by extroverts, for extroverts: At school they push you to come out of your shell, at work they highly encourage group brainstorming sessions; the world pretty much teaches us, from a very young age, that we must become more extroverted. While there isn’t anything inherently wrong with any of that, you can’t deny that, as a society, we’ve lost a basic yet foundational capability, being alone with our thoughts.

In his Pensees, philosopher Blaise Pascal wrote that “all of humanity’s problems, stem from man’s inability to seat quietly in a room alone.”

I don’t know if I fully agree with such an extreme statement, but I definitely get Pascal’s point: Most people nowadays can’t even fathom spending a Saturday night at home.

Yet here I am, Saturday night, talking to you through my computer, writing, and listening to music, all by myself. I’d be lying if I said I stay at home every day and night of the week, but I do find myself craving more alone time than most of my peers — as an introvert, I have a preference for more quiet, minimally stimulating environments, which is why I’m not only comfortable, I actually enjoy seating quietly in a room, alone.

Bill Gates, for example, is living proof of how introverts enjoy and actually thrive during their alone time: He is arguably the most successful introvert on this planet, and from time to time he likes to have what he calls “think weeks”. 

Matthias Reumann

 wrote a great article on them, but in short, a think week is a week in which Gates decides to go off the grid, separate from civilization and just reflect and ponder on different subjects, like the future of technology.

Who would’ve thought, Bill Gates, the co-founder and chairman of Microsoft, an introvert:

We make great leaders

Unexpected, right?

I don’t think there’s a scientifically-proven list of qualities needed for great leadership, but if I asked you to come up with one yourself, what would you write down? It would probably look something like this: Assertive, talkative, sociable, action-oriented, confident — extroverts are usually regarded by society as natural born leaders, and honestly, I can see why.

I can see why, but are they actually right?

According to the data, not completely: In 2012 Susan Cain published a book called “Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking”, and the whole second chapter was pretty much dedicated to debunking this myth. As she puts it:

“Extroverts are routinely chosen for leadership positions and introverts are looked over, even though introverts often deliver better outcomes.”

The numbers speak clearly, our world population is equally divided: Half introverts, half extroverts, give or take. Still, according to a study presented by the Wall Street Journal, only 5% of midlevel managers are considered introverts, the number goes down to 3% when it comes to executives, and as low as 2% for top executives.

As you can see, not many introverts get to those leadership positions, but the few who do, tend to deliver incredible results.

Elon Musk, Warren Buffet, Mahatma Gandhi, Rosa Parks, Abraham Lincoln. Whether it be running a company, a country, or a movement, these names have had a massive influence in their respective fields, and they are/were all introverts.

According to Cain, the secret behind these quiet leaders’ successful leadership, can be boiled down to two main factors:

By nature, us introverts, tend to get extremely passionate about the matters that interest us in life. Passion for our work, a cause, or a mission, allows us to gain expertise, inspire trust, and make alliances — in other words, when the people we are leading feel that commitment, they too get inspired and fully invest themselves in that work, cause, or mission.

A less romantic, yet fundamental aspect of quiet leadership, is our ability to listen: “Introverted leaders tend to solicit ideas from other people and listen to those ideas and use them, so there is not as much of a brain drain”, said Cain in an interview with WorkHuman Radio.

Before I let you go, I’d like to clear one thing up: This is in no way, shape or form an attack on extroverted people.

I just thought it’d be nice to, for once, praise all the introverts out there.

We are used to being told that we should talk more, open up more, go out more, but I firmly believe that thinking more, pondering more, and reflecting more, is equally as important.

So, to all my fellow introverts out there, keep being yourself, and remember:

“Spend your free time the way you like, not the way you think you’re supposed to.” — Susan Cain

[babywitchofthesouth]

Waxing Moon Actions 🌘🌗 🌖

21 May 2023 to 27 May 2023 - Waxing Crescent Moon

Moon phase to-do

Brighter path for romance

Initiate a conversation in person

Banter in person

Hold eye contact

Ask if he's hungry

Ask if he wants to grab food together

Improving confidence and social skills

Initiate a conversation

Hold eye contact

Smile at people

Tell a joke

Practice active listening

—

Moon sign to-do

Gemini moon (20 May 5:47am to 22 May 2:27pm)

Socialise

Go to a bar

Message him

Learn

Uni work

Use logic and wit

Crack jokes

Cancer moon (22 May 2:28pm to 25 May 1:33am)

Self care and alone time

Rose quarts face roller

Take a bath

Journal

Confidence meditation

Relationship podcasts

Communing with loved ones

Text him

Be aware of sensitivity from me and him

Leo moon (25 May 1:34am to 27 May 2:03pm)

Be creative 

Do something cool at karate

Learn a song on guitar

Practice drawing

Go out

Dinner with dad

Virgo moon (27 May 2:04pm to 30 May 1:49am)

See below

—

28 May 2023 - First Quarter Moon in Virgo

Virgo moon

Organise

Clean room

Rest

Sleep in

Sleep early

Self care

Bath

Take practical steps and action towards intentions (specific to First Quarter Moon)

Reflect

Journal 

Note any difficulties achieving my intentions (specific to First Quarter Moon)

Introversion

If he wants to talk to me he can message me first

Don't stress if he doesn't

Recharge my social battery

—

29 May 2023 to 3 June 2023 - Waxing Gibbous Moon

Virgo moon (27 May 2:04pm to 30 May 1:49am)

See above

Libra moon (30 May 1:50am to 1 June 10:43am)

Find mutual understanding

Get to know someone better

Text him

Remedy indecisiveness

Find joy in love and beauty

Take photos on a wall

Look at art

Change phone case

Go shopping 

Scorpio moon (1 June 10:44am to 3 June 4:02pm)

Be passionate

Sexual expression

Have a heartfelt conversation 

Put energy into karate

Meditation

Mindfulness and reducing jealousy

Bond with partner

Text him

Sagittarius moon (3 June 4:03pm to 5 June 6:29pm)

Spontaneity 

Go out with friends 

Travel

Learn

Try something new

Short term joy

—————————————

Here’s the explanation for fellow baby witches

The Waxing Moon is a lunar phase associated with gaining power and energy and acting on intentions that were set during the New Moon. This phase can be split up into three sections.

1. Waxing Crescent

This phase is the best time for planning and announcing what actions you need to do to accomplish your intentions. It's recommended to set to-do lists and note specific activities for the next two weeks to achieve short term goals in line with your intentions set on during the New Moon in relation to the next six months. I wrote my checklist in two parts, one focusing on overall the next two weeks during the Waxing phase and my intentions.

2. First Quarter

This phase is a reminder to take action as the moon is easily visible during the day, and become aware of any obstacles you're facing in achieving them. It's the best time to take practical steps to enforce your intentions that were set during the New Moon. Here I'll try to do something that has a direct affect on my intentions.

3. Waxing Gibbous

This phase is for refinement. If the challenges you realised during the First Quarter phase are hindering achieving your intentions, change your course. When this phase arrives, I'm going to look at my to-do list and see if any edits can be made to make them more achievable.

A lot of my moon phase activities on acting on my intentions during this 2 week period before the full moon overlap, because my romantic life and confidence go hand in hand. I still decided to separate them to distinguish between making progress in my external love life and making internal progress on my self-esteem.

So, since every 2-3 days, the moon enters a new zodiac sign, I made mini to-do lists for the associations of each sign that will also help me achieve my intentions, but more indirectly. I used the descriptions from the app 'It's just a phase' to guide my action plans, then I created more specific to-do checklist items based on my person life and what's actually achievable for me. I did keep in mind my intentions while writing these, but they're less influenced by it than the moon phase to-do list.

Check out the other parts of this series!

Part 1 - Intentions. Last post

Part 2 - Actions. Current post

Part 3 - Spellwork. Next post