#incorrect qoutes harry potter

[travelleryanii]

Cravings for today: A fanfic about a professor at Hogwarts who secretly developed fondness for Severus. Years before the war, mc finds out that Snape is a death eater. Worried of the perils of her beloved’s shenanigans, she seeks audience with Voldemort in which she convinced him to make an unbreakable vow with her. The deal; She pledges her undying loyalty to him and does whatever he needs her to do, so long as Voldemort sends her to dangerous missions instead of Severus and promises not to harm him. All of these happens without the potion master knowing.

AaaAaaAaaa… I need this so bad rn I’m tempted to write it. 😭

[billi-mausi]

So I might have written a Jegulus fic on this.

This is how you fall in love by adorexmoony

[vioranhyperfixation]

Ron : who traumatised you?

Harry : do you you want a list?

Ron, with his wand out :

Hermione, with her spellbook out: yeah actually, that would be helpful.

[jade-eclipse-lithium]

You drink all of these?

Yes.

By yourself?

As you can see.

[silence-between-seconds]

Sirius: if the moon is made of cheese and saturn is six, how many pancakes could you eat on Mars?

James: yellow

Sirius: the correct answer is packing peanuts

James: oh i see, bcs you carry the two and-

Remus: what is wrong with you people?!

[evansisasadist]

Hermione: I want Harry in the bridal party

Ron: And I want him to be my best man

*both glaring at each other*

Harry: *nervously backing away*

[bigolidioot]

The marauders and things my friends have said P.1

Sirius: Heard back from my therapist! I have ptsd!!!

*does a little dance*

Everyone: *cheers*

[djcanipe99]

Grover ,Ron : Why is the only woman you've cared about a criminal? Are you a masochist?

Percy,Harry: Allow me to explain.

Grover,Ron : Allow me. She's the only adversary who ever outsmarted you. Twice. Made a proper idiot out of you.

Percy,Harry: Right, you've had your fun.

Grover,Ron : What's she after, anyway?

Percy,Harry: It's time to press on.

Grover,Ron: What could she possibly need?

Percy,Harry : It doesn't matter.

Grover,Ron : An alibi? A beard? A human canoe. She could sit on your back and paddle you up the Thames.

Percy,Harry : That's of no consequence to you, is it? We've done our last case together.

Grover,Ron : I've already read it. Missing person: Luke Reordan, 4 foot 10, red hair, no front teeth.

Grover,Ron: Case solved. You're obviously not her type. She likes ginger dwarves.

Percy,Harry: Midget.

Grover,Ron : So you agree?

Percy,Harry: No, I don't agree. It's more than technicality, you see. You're misrepresenting the dimensions of foreshortened peoples.

Grover,Ron : I've said too much. I've upset you.

Percy,Harry: No, I am simply stating that one has...

Grover,Ron: What were you doing?

Percy,Harry: Will you allow me to explain?

Grover,Ron: I wish you would.

Ned,Rhodey : Why is the only woman you've cared about a criminal? Are you a masochist?

Peter,Tony : Allow me to explain.

Rhodey, Ned : Allow me. She's the only adversary who ever outsmarted you. Twice. Made a proper idiot out of you.

Peter,Tony: Right, you've had your fun.

Ned,Rhodey : What's she after, anyway?

Peter,Tony : It's time to press on.

Ned,Rhodey : What could she possibly need?

Peter,Tony : It doesn't matter.

Ned,Rhodey : An alibi? A beard? A human canoe. She could sit on your back and paddle you up the Thames.

Peter,Tony: That's of no consequence to you, is it? We've done our last case together.

Ned,Rhodey: I've already read it. Missing person: Luke Reordan, 4 foot 10, red hair, no front teeth.

Ned,Rhodey: Case solved. You're obviously not her type. She likes ginger dwarves.

Peter,Tony : Midget.

Ned,Rhodey: So you agree?

Peter,Tony : No, I don't agree. It's more than technicality, you see. You're misrepresenting the dimensions of foreshortened peoples.

Ned,Rhodey: I've said too much. I've upset you.

Peter,Tony: No, I am simply stating that one has...

Ned,Rhodey : What were you doing?

Peter,Tony: Will you allow me to explain?

Ned,Rhodey: I wish you would.

Gray,Zorro ,sasuke and katsuki: Why is the only woman you've cared about a criminal? Are you a masochist?

Luffy,natsu, naruto and izuku :Allow me to explain.

Gray,Zorro ,Sasuke and katsuki: Allow me. She's the only adversary who ever outsmarted you. Twice. Made a proper idiot out of you.

Luffy, natsu ,naruto and izuku: Right, you've had your fun.

Gray,Zorro ,sasuke and katsuki:What's she after, anyway?

Luffy, natsu , naruto and izuku :It's time to press on.

Gray,Zorro, sasuke and katsuki : What could she possibly need?

Luffy, natsu ,naruto and izuku: It doesn't matter.

Gray,Zorro sasuke and katsuki:An alibi? A beard? A human canoe. She could sit on your back and paddle you up the Thames.

Luffy, natsu naruto and izuku:That's of no consequence to you, is it? We've done our last case together.

Gray,Zorro , sasuke and katsuki : I've already read it. Missing person: Luke Reordan, 4 foot 10, red hair, no front teeth.

Gray,Zorro ,sasuke and katsuki : Case solved. You're obviously not her type. She likes ginger dwarves.

Luffy, natsu ,naruto and Izuku: Midget.

Gray,Zorro ,sasuke and katsuki : So you agree?

Luffy, natsu, naruto and izuku : No, I don't agree. It's more than technicality, you see. You're misrepresenting the dimensions of foreshortened peoples.

Gray,Zorro ,sasuke and katsuki:I've said too much. I've upset you.

Luffy, natsu ,naruto and izuku: No, I am simply stating that one has...

Gray,Zorro , sasuke and katsuki : What were you doing?

Luffy, natsu ,naruto and izuku : Will you allow me to explain?

Gray,Zorro ,sasuke and katsuki : I wish you would.

Zach : Why is the only woman you've cared about a criminal? Are you a masochist?

Will: Allow me to explain.

Zach : Allow me. She's the only adversary who ever outsmarted you. Twice. Made a proper idiot out of you.

Will : Right, you've had your fun.

Zach : What's she after, anyway?

Will : It's time to press on.

Zach : What could she possibly need?

Will : It doesn't matter.

Zach: An alibi? A beard? A human canoe. She could sit on your back and paddle you up the Thames.

Will : That's of no consequence to you, is it? We've done our last case together.

Zach: I've already read it. Missing person: Luke Reordan, 4 foot 10, red hair, no front teeth.

Zach: Case solved. You're obviously not her type. She likes ginger dwarves.

Will : Midget.

Zach: So you agree?

Will : No, I don't agree. It's more than technicality, you see. You're misrepresenting the dimensions of foreshortened peoples.

Zach : I've said too much. I've upset you.

Will : No, I am simply stating that one has..

Zach : What were you doing?

Will : Will you allow me to explain?

Zach : I wish you would.

Dante, tucker ,wade and spud : Why is the only woman you've cared about a criminal? Are you a masochist?

Lok, Danny,Ron and jake: Allow me to explain.

Dante, tucker ,wade and spud : Allow me. She's the only adversary who ever outsmarted you. Twice. Made a proper idiot out of you.

Lok, Danny,Ron and jake: Right, you've had your fun.

Dante, tucker ,wade and spud : What's she after, anyway?

Lok, Danny,Ron and jake: It's time to press on.

Dante, tucker ,wade and spud : What could she possibly need?

Lok, Danny,Ron and jake: It doesn't matter.

Dante, tucker ,wade and spud : An alibi? A beard? A human canoe. She could sit on your back and paddle you up the Thames.

Lok, Danny,Ron and jake: That's of no consequence to you, is it? We've done our last case together.

Dante, tucker ,wade and spud: I've already read it. Missing person: Luke Reordan, 4 foot 10, red hair, no front teeth.

Dante, tucker ,wade and spud: Case solved. You're obviously not her type. She likes ginger dwarves.

Lok, Danny,Ron and jake: Midget.

Dante, tucker ,wade and spud : So you agree?

Lok, Danny,Ron and jake: No, I don't agree. It's more than technicality, you see. You're misrepresenting the dimensions of foreshortened peoples.

Dante, tucker ,wade and spud : I've said too much. I've upset you.

Lok, Danny,Ron and jake: No, I am simply stating that one has...

Dante, tucker ,wade and spud: What were you doing?

Lok, Danny,Ron and jake: Will you allow me to explain?

Dante, tucker ,wade and spud: I wish you would.

[jade-eclipse-lithium]

That’s a Hufflepuff on the right

[haiitzmeh]

Drarry Incorrect Qoute #1

Harry: So you just put it in the hole but try not to shove it in

Harry: It hurts when you do it at first

Harry: try to put it in gently, you can do it rough if you want though

Harry: also putting it in the hole too hard might cause bleeding

Draco: oh , that's how you do it, thank you love

Pansy: *slams door open* OMG ARE YOU TEACHING DRACO TO DO THE DEED

Harry: no! I'm teaching him to make a plug for when your nose is runny... duh

Harry: what made you possibly think that?

[draysslytherclaw]

Post-hogwarts, on the phone..

???: we have your kids, Mr. Malfoy

Draco: what do you want? What are your demands? How much do you need?

???: sir, it’s their school. Their dismissal was 3 hours ago, and your spouse told us this morning that you are to pick them up.

Draco: OH SHI- I’ll be right there. Please don’t tell my spouse that I forgot.

Ps. If you see this, I am probably on tumblr break :))

To my moots, I am not ignoring u! College has just been tough so I took a break here. Nonetheless, Ily all so much. Feel free to dm me, I will reply asap 🤍

[harryandginnydeservesbetter]

*Gryffindor dormitory*

Dean : Okay, let's play would you rather

Ron: Alright Harry, would you rather die or-

Harry: Die

Ron : I am not finished yet

Harry : Die

@acciorxses @harrypotter-and-goldensnitch @hinnysphoenix @her-blazing-look

[favouritelyincorrectlycorrect]

We Can Do This!!!!

PLEASE SHARE!!!

[vioranhyperfixation]

Harry : I love you guys, you're the best thing that's happened to me.

Hermione :

Ron, glancing around :

Hermione : We're the best thing that's ever happened to you?

Harry : Yes!

Ron : I'm starting to feel a little sorry for you.

[jade-eclipse-lithium]

Why don’t you actually calm down?

I’VE NEVER BEEN CALMER.

[silence-between-seconds]

Draco: When I had a crush on a boy for the first time, I didn't know what to do so I sent him a letter that said 'get out of my school' Harry: That was you?!!!