#incorrect headless

[incorrectheadlessquotes]

Ichabod: I need some advice.

Diedrich, not even looking up from his ukulele: you came to the right person

[astra-lilies]

Matilda: We need to find a way to get this door open... Ichabod, hand me your credit card.

Ichabod: Okay.

Matilda, pocketing it: Alright. Now, Brom, could you break down this door?

[heatherfield]

New Girl

Incorrect Quotes + Headless: A Sleepy Hollow Story [x]  

Bonus:

[writebackatya]

“I built a sophisticated robot who is capable of many things and he has decided to those abilities to blindfold himself and play a game where you get candy by mindlessly batting a papier-mâché project shaped like a donkey. It’s fine! I’m fine! Everything is fine!”

[shewhowantsmouseears]

[klinefelterrible]

Minerva McGonagall: there are four houses

Minerva McGonagall: Pufflebuffledufflepumps, Ravencoldalausentopfenkoch, Greevindorflindlortf and Slutherin

Sorting hat: and we all know where Malfoy goes

Severus Snape: Minerva for fuck sakes

Minerva McGonagall: what

Nearly headless Nick: you said Plumpenhuhfufflendington wrong

Severus Snape: yeah, that too

Severus Snape: who the fuck would want to go there and remember this stupid name anyway

Minerva McGonagall: *taking a sip* who the fuck would want to remember your name anyway

[carry-on-my-waiward-child]

[girl-named-matty]

The irony of me bringing him along on this quest.

[awigglycultist]

*Brom is teaching*

Student: What did you say?

Brom: I said, whoever threw that paper, your mom’s a hoe!

[shychick-52]

*Sometime right after Gandra becomes an official member of Team Science, post-series*

Gandra: *to Gyro, Manny (wearing his lab coat, wings folded), and Lil Bulb on Gyro's shoulder* Could you guys excuse us for a few minutes?

Gyro: Excuse me, but whatever she has to say, she can say in front of us! Right, Dr. Intern?

Fenton: Uh... maybe you better go.

Gyro: *throws up his hands in exasperation* ...It starts. You think you know a guy!

*They exit the GizmoCloud, where they'd all been doing experiments*

Fenton: Gyro Gearloose. You'll learn to love him.

Gandra: Forget about him. Now that we're finally alone... *pulls him closer by his tie, and they start to kiss*

*Later, Gyro, Manny, and Lil Bulb stare at the lab's washroom door where the lovebirds are still inside hooked up to the GizmoCloud*

Gyro: Ugh! This is horseshit!

Manny: Excuse me?!

Gyro: I'm talking about them! *gestures toward washroom* Him. Her. *sarcastically sentimental tone* Alone.

Manny: What's wrong with that?

Lil Bulb: It's not as if you don't know they're together.

Gyro: Yes, but she's part of the team now! Things are... different. *starts to sing* I can see what's happening.

Manny: What?

Gyro: And they don't even see.

Lil Bulb: Who?

Gyro: They're so in love, and here's the bottom line- our quartet's down to three. *gestures to the three of them*

Manny: *understanding* Oh.

Gyro: *tearing up* It can be assumed-

Manny: *patting Gyro's back, before singing along* -His science-filled days with us are history.

All: In short, our friend is doomed.

*They all look at each other and burst into loud sobs*

[incorrectheadlessquotes]

Diedrich Knickerbocker, pulling out his ukulele: You know what I've realized?

Ichabod: that some things are better left unsaid?

Diedrich Knickerbocker: Haha, nice try anyways-

[lulu-cat-princess]

Lord Bone: Humphrey stop waving that sword around. You’re going to chop off your head one day if you don’t be careful.

Teen Humphrey: You can’t tell me what to do!

20ish years later:

Lord Bone (watching his headless son stuck on earth as a ghost): I told you to be careful, but no you are still the rebellious youth on the inside. 

Humphrey on the first day as a ghost: Curse you father!

[heatherfield]

Nancy Drew

Incorrect Quotes + Headless: A Sleepy Hollow Story [x]  

[writebackatya]

Huey: Oh come on! Fenton’s your loyal assistant, can’t you let him borrow your lab for one night?

Gyro: No! I absolutely refuse to help out!

Huey: Don’t you believe in love?

Gyro: No! I don’t think the intern will ever find love so why should let a couple of elementary school kids use MY lab?

Webby: Well then I guess you leave us no choice. {hits Gyro’s head with a sock filled with nickels}

Huey: WEBBY! WHY DID YOU DO THAT?

Webby: He was never going to say “Yes” and it’s not like we have another lab we can borrow to pretend to be Fenton’s lab

Huey: But what about them!? {motions to Lil’ Bulb and Manny}

Webby: Hey so we’re setting up a romantic dinner for Fenton and we’re pretending that this lab is his, is that all right?

Lil’ Bulb: {gives a thumbs up}

Manny: {stomps hooves} “Yes”

Huey: Oh wow, with your guys’ help we’ll have this place set up in no time! And you two actually wanna help out?

Lil’ Bulb: {moves hands to talk} “Yeah, if I’m being honest Gyro and I haven’t been on the best terms lately so I’m using any opportunity I can get back at him. And honestly I think Fenton really needs to get laid”

Manny: {claps hooves} “I am SO SICK of him calling me, ‘Manny’! I have a name! It’s Goliath!! Learn Morse Code, genius! And yes, Fenton really needs to get laid”

Webby: I didn’t understand a single word you two just said but it looks like you’re both in! Now someone help me put Gyro’s body somewhere it won’t interrupt Fenton and Gandra’s 1st Date!

Lil’ Bulb & Manny: {grabs Gyro’s body which they drag over to the closet}

Webby: Oh wow, looks like you both got him!

Gyro: {slowly waking up as he is getting dragged} W-what?! Lil’ Bulb! Manny! I order you both t-

Lil’ Bulb & Manny: {throws Gyro into the closet and locks the door}

Webby: Well that takes care of that!

Huey: All right everyone, let’s turn this lab into the most romantic place in all of Duckburg!

Manny: {claps hooves} “I can play the accordion!”

[heatherfield]

[x]

god i'm so tired of everybody's bad faith interpretations of everything. where's the trust. where's the forgiveness. where's the understanding that most things are complex and most people have many layers. and like the black eyed peas once said. where is the love

[awigglycultist]

Brom: I didn't drink that much last night

Icabod: You were flirting with Matilda.

Brom: So what? She's my wife

Icabod: You asked if she was single.

Icabod: And then you cried when they said they weren't.