#in one form or another
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I'm love them
(edited: making the hands right and adding alt text)
Edit: year-later followup
#my art#linked universe#lu four#lu shadow#sundays are good days for drawing#taking a writing break#but cant get Them off my mind#in one form or another
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I desperately want to know what Luxu’s relationship with attachment is. Does he still make them? What is his relationship with loss? Does he grieve the generations of friends that have come and gone? Or are the numbers so many that it’s ceased to have meaning? Kingdom Hearts is all about our attachments and the power of them and then we have this character who has lived an untold number of lives, loving and losing and letting go, tasked solely with observation. In observing he puts himself right in the middle of it. Has he grown weary of it?
I think often about his friendship with Eraqus. By the time Birth By Sleep comes around does it mean anything to him, to have played a part in his death?
I think about his relationship with young Xehanort, with apprentice Xehanort, with Xemnas. What does it feel like to have this relationship that spans decades where for once he is not the only one whose form keeps changing?
I think about his relationship with being a nobody. Is it nice, to be separated from a heart that carries generations worth of pain?
I think about Xemnas’ death scene in KH3 a lot. I think about “the emptiness where my companions once stood.” How that loneliness is Xehanort’s losses, Terra’s losses, and Xemnas’ own. I think of “it must take incredible strength”. Everyone who has ever lived knows the truth in the weight of those words. And then I think of how this too reflects on Luxu who has lived so many lives.
What does a heart look like, after all of that?
#luxu#xigbar#bragi#kh spoilers#khdr really did a massive reset on my Thoughts about this man#I know they really can’t have put anything more to it in KH3#but the fact that Xehanort and Eraqus both die and pass and I don’t think they ever know their friend Bragi is still there#especially Xehanort who spends so much time with him#in one form or another#I want to know what’s living in this man’s mind#can’t wait for missing link to reveal a character to be him#can’t wait for KH4 to do whatever the fuck it’s going to do#I just want. more kingdom hearts#khml open up and let me in 🥺#text post
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#Mirror: Louis Tomlinson holds hands with mystery blonde months after split from ex-girlfriend#months... ?#''mystery blonde'' identified as Swedish model Sofie Nyvang#is she a model like Eleanor is a model?#his PR never moved on from that 1D powerpoint that established his image would revolve around his ''supermodel'' girlfriend#in one form or another#rather than a strategic campaign to increase his visibility and credibility as a solo artist. and get his music out there to new audiences#there's tabloid press reliant on his personal life. introducing a new non-famous girlfriend - the one who might actually benefit#you have to read the article to learn about the documentary#this sort of press has never got anyone interested in his music. or led to good promo either#and shifts focus away from his music in the fandom as well#but no doubt this time it will be different...
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Today wasn't perfect but I think today was a pretty good day.
Work was laid back - I went to the Zoo - I spent some time with my cat - I talked with some friends
Pretty good day
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More evidence, as though it were needed, that binge-watching is unhealthy behavior!
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uhgvbr
#i hate havibg anger issues i feel so frustrated over stupjd shit#well to be fsir quite a bit of it is warranted but#like i could say anythign negative In General without getting told to shut up#in one form or another#anyway im so exhausted im taking q nap or at least laying down forever
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oh my god it’s done
#al:an talking#I finished those infernal portraits#fuck man#I mean like I still have work to do before I post them#but the actual portraits themselves are done#literally over a year I’ve spent working on these#in one form or another#If I ever look back at these and hate them#I need someone to actually literally slap me#I am never allowed to dislike these or be disappointed in them
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~What i couldve been~
I was just gonna do the adult timeline zelda but im so enchanted by the idea of these two versions of the same character. People always talk about how link would be changed but never zelda.
#tloz#princess zelda#sheik#majoras mask#ocarina of time#loz redesigns round 2#art#my art#redesigns#they had Entirely different teen years#a zelda who had to deal with the deaths of those close to her and having to be in hiding#meanwhile training up to hopefully take care of it on her own#only to seemingly doom her kingdom in the future to save another timeline from the same grief#creating this zelda who seemingly at most has one bad vision which is immedietly#confirmed by random fairy boy in the woods#and seemingly lives happily ever after?#i wish we knew more from the new timeline other than boring implications from tw-light pr-ncess#but yes i split different design element over both of them#oot zelda having shorter hair like her sheik form#while mm zelda keeps the long#also using some elements from the kid design like mm still kinda having that headband alongside the crown#the l-nks will be another post since i only have ideas for one right now
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You go, ghoul!!!!
The word “ghoul” is so nonspecific in that in most contexts it can refer to anything from a ghost to a shambling undead zombie to just some sort of guy who looks weird. Despite its generic and unspecific meaning, it remains somewhat popular solely because ghoul is an extremely fun word to say
#ghoul#ghoul is the all-encompassing like queer#i feel like therefore all ghouls are queer#in one form or another
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Heh...Literally nothing personal, kid.
[First] Prev <–-> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#sect leader yao#This episode has a lot of scenes I know people are excited for and starting here seems odd but here me out:#The sheer hilarity of this opening scene was too good to not give a highlight to.#Dare I say it? I think this is THE most underrated scene in the whole series.#You have one guy flashing WWX his prosthetic leg. Another complains about his dead parents.#And the third guy? He has no personal grievances at all. He's just here to be included.#You cannot get better comedic timing than that. Sect leader Yao you will always be famous to me.#There is also something to be said about how this scene is about shifting blame and holding a false trial.#And we also have the main theme about rumours vs truth in how Sect leader Yao is only here based on what he's been told to beleive.#And WWX is so exhausted by the blame! He was one breath away from saying 'form a queue and I'll take your complaints one by one'#WWX (overall) didn't do those things directly but he's the one the responsibility falls on.#Despite the fact that the first siege was *not* incited by him. It's like hitting someone and getting mad your fist got hurt.#What a brilliantly frustrating scene!#Anyways next up are the long awaited pheonix mountain flashabck scenes. We finally made it.#and AHH Season 3!!! The last stretch! Thank you all for rooting me on up until this point!
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little part 2 to the previous one
#fionna and cake#adventure time#prismo the wishmaster#scarab the god auditor#prohibitedwish#i got so quickly called out for how i drew scarab . . . i got lampooned soo fast#they ar to t4t in my brain#back to the gay bug and wallsticker posting#i imagine scarabs so used to being the more dominating one by a default in any form of relationship just cause of his personality#and this intense mf dont realize that theres another option so hes just like 'oh shit' 'didnt think that was a thing that could happen'#this bug just realized some things
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I think depictions of Anya being cruel to Curly or drawing out his suffering are artful and chilling but completely miss the point of the story and her character.
I'm not saying she doesn't deserve to have that "I told you so" moment with him but not in something callous or cold. Even if that is how it happened, she'd immediately feel guilty cause at that point she's not tormenting her tormenter or even the person truly at fault. She's doing something cathartic, similar to how Jimmy likely hits Curly to release rage he can't against the rest of the crew. She'd see herself as no different when she'd come back from the moment and see Curly cowering at her. She wants someone to take responsibility but how does being cruel to the defenseless help? Why would she want the power Jimmy has over her over Curly?
The idea of her extending someone else's pain is just so against the struggles she already faces and how she can't even bring herself to cause someone pain even to help them. Her very desire is to release herself from her own suffering and I doubt she'd even fine some sort of guilty release in being cruel to another.
#anya is not a character i see taking agency or indulging in cathartic behaviors#not knowingly like i see her as a character trapped in her head and maybe in the scenario she's cruel to Curly she is envisioning Jimmy#in his place but its not a story about justice or those deserving of punishment and those not like its the opposite of people projecting#their issues on the wrong people and saying things to the wrong people and doing things they shouldn't but anya uniquely falls out of it as#she is subjected to a lot of it but it is also not something she wants to subject another person to like you are doing what Jimmy does and#placing ur rage into another persons and viewing their actions through your eyes like she'd more likely yell at him than do harm or#cause him more pain like at least make it in character#but also she clearly doesn't want to see jimmy or curly in the same light and doesnt because she still repeatedly goes to Curly for comfort#and protection and god there's like concepts that need to be applied to characters individually and then the story as a whole#we can not view the game through only one themed lens less we forget to inspect the compounding factor of Anya is so much more than girl#that needs to be allowed to go off but a woman that simply wants right to be done by her and no more harm like she doesn't want to be aroun#the suffering like idk but some of yall would just benefit from like understanding that people are inherently grey with the capabilities of#black n white thinking or actions#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#anya mouthwashing#i like her the most but then again i am defensive of all women in media and hate when people change the way the character would take agency#for themselves like yes I want her to tweak out but she just wouldn't and I like seeing realistic depictions of a woman suffering the way#she is like shes not the type at the end of the movie to have a one liner but feel a shallow freedom cause she needs to realistically heal#idk but its just like there is an obbsession forming with making her character her pain and not how she handles and navigates the issue
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the question came to mind of "in your ship, how might the larger/stronger party pick up or carry the smaller one?" and these were the answers i came to
#quill to paper#can't get over draco and harry being like 3 yrs deep in a relationship and still irritating the fuck out of one another#drarry#linny#romione#drarry fanart#linny fanart#romione fanart#draco malfoy#harry potter#luna lovegood#ginny weasley#ron weasley#hermione granger#also it's my belief that the weasleys are literally all hot in some way shape or form#even percys hot in like a pretentious high ranking office grunt sort of way#ginny? my god. as a dyke: professional quidditch player ginny could do unspeakable things to me#rons got the whole head auror thing going for him and also being just sorta rugged. if still pale as hell#stock photos + one pose photo used as refs#draco is screeching smth like UNHAND ME BASTARD!!!!!!!#hermione gets to be smug about her hot auror arm candy husband#also yeah i'm inflicting my music taste on harry. he gets ahold of grunge and goes completely off the handle with it#everclear beloved
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SO many people have been doing Pokemon ability forms, so I hopped on the train with dwebble!
This challenge was started by @n0rtist
Shell Armor dwebble has smaller, more delicate claws to help it excavate each shell fossil on the rock it makes its home. These shells help disrupt powerful attacks, preventing critical hits.
Sturdy dwebble has thick, wide claws to keep it safe! It makes its home in the strongest mineral it can find. (this one chose a large chunk of jade) This dwebble's shell is much harder to break than the others'- not even an OH-KO can crack it!
Weak armor dwebble has long legs for running more quickly than its counterparts and long, precise claws for gripping and reattaching lost pieces of its shell. Its shell is made from clay that crumbles easily, so it spends a lot of its time running around with a half broken shell, or without one entirely. Unlike other dwebble, which use their corrosive spray to hollow out and repair their shells, this dwebble spits water to mold the clay.
**IMPORTANT**
I do not give my consent or permission for my art to be re-posted on this or any other site. I do not give my consent or permission for my art to be used to train any type of AI.
#n0rtist this challenge is so fun#dwebble is so cute#lol its not even a pokemon i use very much i just happened to have caught one recently while replaying bw#pokemon#pokémon#pokemon variations#pokemon ability forms#pokemon fanart#my art#pokemon art#pokemon dwebble#dwebble#fakemon#ability forms#these are so fun! i might do another
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I have very strong opinions about disaster preparation as someone who lives in a tornado zone, where evacuation is NOT an option for anyone and the only way to definitely survive is to 1) be in a building that WON'T just get picked up AND 2) have a basement, cellar, or specialized tornado shelter.
The simple fact is that the majority of fatalities in tornadoes are people living in mobile homes/trailers and those deaths could be reduced massively if the government built tornado shelters in high risk areas. But there's been very, very little effort to do that and tornadoes are just getting stronger and more deadly while poor people are left to huddle in our bathtubs, listening to the sirens and thinking about easily we could die.
#you can't evacuate in a tornado#there's very little if any warning and tornadoes are just way too unpredictable#they also don't last long. they form. they hit. they vanish.#it only takes minutes in a lot of cases#and now we're seeing more clusters forming together#so trying to flee from one tornado can result in going straight in the path of another#or even getting hit by the first one if it changes its path#and you do NOT want to be in a car when a tornado hits
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my gendered experience growing up as an intersex person was overwhelmingly defined by my responses and resistance to everything that got me labeled as a failure: failure to quickly get a gender assigned at birth, failure to go through a normal puberty and grow up into a woman, failure at meeting the standards for "complete womanhood" because of my intersex sex traits, and yet simultaneously failing to ever be acknowledged as a "real man" and being treated as a threat when I expressed I wanted to transition.
before i realized i was a man and came out as trans, the ways that girlhood was denied to me was very often humiliating and painful. locker rooms filled with other girls were a frequent source of shame. there were many big and small ways that i was told that my intersex body made me insufficient, incomplete, broken. i was forced onto estrogen, forced into shaving my body hair, and was constantly being told to change myself to better fit this mystical idea of a "normal woman." and even though I ultimately ended up becoming a man, the denial of girlhood was painful.
but i think that these things would have been even more difficult to navigate as an intersex girl if on top of everything I already said, i was having to cope with the denial of my girlhood while i was forced into boys locker rooms. if my doctors were forcing me onto testosterone hrt and refusing to even discuss estrogen, if all my legal paperwork had "M" on it and was a logistical nightmare to change, if every support group for my intersex variation labeled it as a "men's support group," if the LGBTQ community spaces i tried to join were misogynistic towards me often to the point of exile, if my self determination as an intersex girl was denied in most spaces of my life, and on and on and on. while listing all these things out i also don't want to make it seem like it's all about suffering and pain--so much of transition for me has been about joy in my self determination and how much it feels like a reclamation of autonomy to decide what I want my body and self to be like--i know this is an experience i share with so many of my trans intersex friends.
as an person who was AFAB, although there were many ways that trying to grow up as an intersex girl were a painful, logistical nightmare, many times and places that i was excluded from woman's spaces, etc. however, there was a simultaneous affirmation that i was right to strive for that in the first place. which is logic rooted in some fucked up compulsory dyadism, but also which would have made some things slightly easier or even possible at all if i had wanted to embrace being an intersex girl within this fucked up system.
pretty much every time i've seen people on tumblr talking about "afab transfems" in an intersex context, people seem happy to collapse these experiences and act like there's no meaningful distinction or point in distinguishing between different types of intersex embodiment. it seems incredibly extractive, to be perfectly honest with you--taking terms already used by a community to make meaning of their experiences and to expand and dilute that term enough that it means something pretty different than the original.
it's making me think about the concept of epistemic injustice, which is a term coined by Miranda Fricker to describe oppression related to knowledge, communication, and making meaning of the world. There's two subtypes of epistemic injustice: testimonial injustice and hermeneutical injustice. Testimonial injustice refers to the dynamic where marginalized people are labeled as not credible, excluded from conversations, and their testimony and knowledge is labeled as unreliable, even when they're the ones who are experts and have first hand experience of what people are talking about. (this is why i probably won't make this post rebloggable--i've noticed this pattern on tumblr many times where trans men speaking about transmisogyny get lots of notes and are given a lot of grace, where trans women are silenced, attacked for not having perfect wording, and otherwise delegitimized.)
the second type is called hermeneutical injustice. it describes how marginalized people are denied the right to make sense of the experiences in their own lives. this can look like preventing people from building community, terminology, a political understanding of themselves, and the interpretive resources needed to process how you live in the world.
this is a form of injustice that I think almost all intersex people are very familiar with--we are denied community and interpretive resources to the point that we're told we don't even exist, that intersex isn't a real word, and so many more examples that leave us isolated and with very few options for understanding what we're collectively experiencing. as an intersex person i really intimately understand how frustrating, confusing, and painful it is to not have words for your experiences, your identity, your life.
so it makes me really sad and pissed off when it seems like intersex people seem to be replicating this exact same type of epistemic injustice towards transfems and specifically towards intersex transfems. pretty much every time recently i see people talking about "afab transfems" they're doing so in a way that seems to deny that trans women even have the right to make sense of their own experiences in the world. there seems to be this mindset that these political frameworks, these interpretive resources that transfems have built up are just up for grabs for anyone. and then on top of that has come with it a lot of cruel, hateful language and direct attacks towards many intersex transfems who are facing so much harassment right now.
an important value to me is this idea of reciprocity as a foundation for solidarity. to me reciprocity means that we're prioritizing the ways we care for each other, we're thinking about how we can uplift each other, and we're watching out for extractive or exploitative patterns where one group is constantly expected to be in "solidarity" with another group without getting the same respect and care back toward them. i think that there could be so many ways that intersex people of all genders could share our overlapping experiences and actually be in true, meaningful solidarity with each other, but i barely ever actually see that happen on tumblr. and that pisses me off, because i do think that there's so much we have in common that we could celebrate and support each other with. i feel so much kinship with so, so many of my trans intersex friends, and ways where i see our lives converge. but i don't think that can happen in an environment where there's no acknowledgment of the ways that our experiences will sometimes (often) differ from each other, and the ways that we have unique needs.
another frustration i've had based on this most recent couple months of transmisogynistic intersex posting on tumblr is how intersex people have been mostly ignoring intersex community resources and devaluing the existing intersex terminology that people created to try to meet our needs. so much of what i've seen people describing on tumblr seems to really line up with the term ipsogender. Ipsogender is a term coined by an intersex sociologist Cary Gabriel Costello, and is used to describe intersex people whose gender matches the gender they were medically assigned at birth, but who might not feel like cis or trans fits them, might experience dysphoria, and who might feel like they've ended up transitioning medically or socially in some ways. this is a word that exists that an intersex person put time into coining because they wanted other intersex people to feel seen, embraced, and have ways of understanding themselves and communicating to others, and that's something that's super meaningful to me! and yet, i've rarely seen anyone reference it, and also seen multiple people making fun of it in other spaces online.
there's also intergender, which is another intersex specific gender term used to describe when your gender is inseparable from your intersex traits, and that your intersex identity is intertwined with your gender identity in some way. some people just identify as intergender, others use it as an adjective and exist as an intergender man or woman. intersex terminology like this is really important to me, especially because we're so often denied the right to make sense of our own experiences.
i think ultimately what i wanted to say with this post is just that when i think about intersex community, some of the most important values of intersex community for me are solidarity, care for each other, and affirming our right to define our own existence. and i don't think that can happen in a community where people are acting in extractive ways, harassing and attacking their fellow community members, and being dismissive of the realities of other intersex people's lives.
#personal#actuallyintersex#intersex#actually intersex#transmisogyny tw#this post is not going to be rebloggable for now but if any intersex mutuals want to reblog it i might turn reblogs on#this just feels like an intersex conversation in a way i would prefer not to do with an audience of spectators.#also a tangent: i do understand that agab is not a body descriptor. i think that agabs are a form of curative violence perpetuated onto us#this is something i've been consistent about expressing for years. if you go back to old posts you'll see that there's many times i've said#over the years that agab is messy. that i know people who were assigned one gender at birth and another gender as a toddler#who identify as cis and trans and a million other things. i understand that and im not interested in denying their existence#so. don't take this as a universal statement from me about every single instance of “amab transman” or “afab transfem.” but rather in the#context of the current dynamic i'm seeing on tumblr of widespread transmisogynistic harassment#that i think much of the way people are talking about this is exploitative and harmful#also i've made many posts before talking about how like. many things would change and become intelligble in a less compulsorly dyadic world#but we aren't there yet. and so there are many terms that are still meaningful and relevant for us right now#and as always: i am one intersex person with one perspective i like to hear from other intersex people including intersex people#who think differently from me
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