#yet you can’t help but just strongly relate to this one poor guy

[bruhstation]

*Breaks into your house to stare wistfully out the window* Do you ever think that CTHenry is, at least by some perceptions, a corpse being kept alive by gold dust and the whimsy of a goddess whose motives are unknown? I do. *Puffs on bubble pipe* Anyway. I'm still holding out hope for a happy ending for our Miserable Train Gays. Iram gentlemen. Have a good day 💗

out of sight, out of mind

[chibivesicle]

Golden Kamuy - Kikuta deserved better - 273-276

As I catch up on things, I’m gonna hit the highlights that really stuck with me.  Ogata is able to escape from Vasily using the tactics he observed from the showdown in Barato with Hijikata cutting through random row houses.  He’s seriously gotten into Vasily’s head as he hesitated to snipe aggressively after killing the wrong guy with Ogata’s cloak.

The only worthwhile thing from this continued and seriously a no longer interesting plot point, is getting to see Ogata wiggle under a fence like a cat.

So, I approve of this at least.  My own cat scores this as an 8/10 in cat wiggling.  Minus 2 points for not enough emotion from Ogata’s face.

Thankfully, Asirpa was able to escape with Sofia after Tsukishima gunned down Ariko.  It seemed to me that Koito froze/hesitated during that situation.  Tsukishima had no problem brutally shooting Ariko at point blank while Koito literally just hung back and watched. 

Asirpa is in a state of extreme shock. She just interrogated by Tsurumi to give up the code, watched Ariko be shot and now sees Boutarou’s corpse in the bottle-mobile.  Our girl needs years of therapy - she’s reaching the same level as our male cast members at this rate.

At least she breaks down in tears as Sugimoto tries to console her.  The artwork for this part of the page is excellent, it really does capture the melting of her mind and how she’s realizing how deadly the gold is.

It ties directly back to her argument with Kikuta before all this shit went down.  I’m always giving Sugimoto crap for being a moron, but it seems that he did make the right action by reaching out to allow her to hug his arm.  There is that soft look as he gazes down at her and just lets her be emotional.  It is clear that his presence is a comfort to her as she takes her time before returning to a more lucid mental state.  This is shown by how she opens her eyes and looks up before declaring that they need to meet up with Hijikata since she’s figured out how to crack the code.

Meanwhile, Kikuta rushed Ariko to a clinic to save his life.  Being the father figure/older brother he is, he tells him that it isn’t his time to die; he never made that makiri yet! And to my relief, Ariko wakes up!  Noda didn’t go for the lazy writing of killing of the minor Ainu character, something I was afraid of.

If his father saved him, it means his makiri was where he was shot in the chest under his uniform.  There is a lovely transition about a makiri in a fictional museum that was made by him, implying that he returned home and did make the makiri and likely resolved some of his identity issues, though it was still likely a tough life for him.  Ariko apologies for not being able to work as a spy for Central and really it isn’t like he’d be able to do so anyways.  But he did verbally point out he’s now politically on the side of someone like Asirpa to fight for their culture and right to exist in spite of colonial powers. The middle panel of Kikuta bidding him farewell just gives me the feels.  It is so clear that Kikuta knows he’s toast.  He saw Tsukishima shoot Ariko and Tsukishima likely watched him as he tried to save the man.

The fact that he said a casual line about going to an onsen.  Ugh, death flag for sure right there.  It seems Ariko knows that as he looks forlorn.  Kikuta is that sort of suave man who is going to look cool even though he’s doomed; he’s that awesome.

The action returns to Tsurumi at the church having solved the code.  With Tsukishima gone off to try to kill Ariko, Koito has remained behind.  All of a sudden Koito reverts to his extreme Satsuma accent when addressing Tsurumi in the absence of Tsukishima.  I think he didn’t even realize it at first, just like how after they escaped the fight with Boutarou, Koito spoke normally to Tsurumi without realizing it.

It is clear it took him a moment to realize he was speaking ‘Koito’ as Tsurumi is unable to respond to him and he then panics.  Koito is more than willing to chase after Tsukishima and support him, but Tsurumi instead recalls him.

At first he consoles himself that everything is okay. 

He is trying very hard to convince himself that everything that they witnessed through the keyhole was all an act to get the key!  Yes, it isn’t that Tsurumi doesn’t have some sort of awesome goal and this isn’t about how the death of his wife and daughter left him unhinged!

But the other random members of the 27th then comment on how strongly Nikaido reeks of beer . . . and Koito then thinks about how he and Tsukishima were hiding in the room at the church when Tsurumi ‘checked’ that he was alone.  And then it hits him - they were also played as a part of the ‘Tsurumi theatre’.  Unlike Tsukishima who has whole-heartily given himself over to Tsurumi, it is clear that Koito can’t.

That monologue sounded too good to be true.  He weakly says Tsukishima’s name into the rain as he then thinks ‘No . . .’  The rain is really fitting in this scene, I think it really is a stand in for Koito’s own disappointment and tears in this entire crazy quest for the gold.  Is he worried about his ‘older’ brother figure?  Himself?  Both of them?

He continues to try to rationalize the performance that Tsurumi gave them - even if Tsurumi lied to them, it wasn’t all a lie.  Oh Koito.  I want to give you a hug and pull you away as your little bon-bon-ness has won me over.  Most of that speech wasn’t for Koito, it was for Tsukishima.  Speaking about helping Japan is what Koito would like to hear but we can tell he doubts that as well.  Hence, his waffling.

But then he realizes that as Tsukishima has given so much - all of Tsurumi’s words, even if they were ‘sweet lies’ as he he referred to them on Karafuto, it was just perfect for Tsukishima.  However, Koito has broken the spell that Tsurumi held over him.  The final page of the chapter of Koito looking at the illuminated Tsurumi and shutting the door on him.  It is the exact opposite of when Tsurumi rescued Koito from the kidnappers when in his youth. I now find myself wondering how this relates to the tiger curse.  It is clear that the curse for Tsukishima will not end well.  After he shot Ariko, his eyes regained their sparkle!  Not good, not good at all!  However, have I misinterpreted it for Koito that by becoming disillusioned with Tsurumi he will be cursed to be miserable through him gaining independence from his hero worship of Tsurumi?  The idea that ignorance is bliss, and now Koito is well in the know.  The fact that when he and Tsukishima were sort of on the same page was when he could speak to Tsurumi but now that he’s on a different path from Tsukishima he’s tripped up again.

Chapter 274 finally allows Asirpa to determine the fake skins after what she witnessed with Boutarou in the brewery and thinking about Ainu garments that she figured out that Edogai likely went above and beyond with his fakes.  Thanks money counterfeiting guy from the fake Ainu village for the inspiration.  It is a lot of pages that tie together other plot points nicely but really doesn’t do anything for me as a reader personally.

The most important point is that as Sugimoto falls asleep while Asirpa and Hijikata work with the skins is that we get another flashback - one that links him to Kikuta!

and even more importantly - Hanazawa Yuusaku!  Chapter 275 starts out with an homage to the classic movie ‘Singing in the Rain’.  As soon as I saw Sugimoto spinning on a lamp post, it was obvious.  Yes, small town boy in the big city - causing trouble.  He gets in some sort of brawl with random guys from the army and is ‘rescued’ by Kikuta, who immediately realizes that he’s hungry and decides to treat him to some lunch.

It shows that Sugimoto has a short fuse and is an impulsive youngster.  Really, he is lucky that he didn’t do more stupid shit to get him in trouble.  We can also clearly see that Kikuta is a member of the 1st Division, the Tokyo based one that Sugimoto eventually enlists with.

Kikuta decides that he wants Sugimoto to impersonate Hanazawa Yuusaku and to go on a marriage interview for him.  This is because Hanazawa Hiro, the now identified wife of Hanazawa, is pulling the strings in the background to prevent Yuusaku from becoming a flag bearer.

This then makes us wonder why these two parents have such contrasting expectations for their only son.  It makes me think back to my theory that Yuusaku was a pretty poor solider and lacked any skill or potential.  Long ago, Tsurumi told Nikaido that Ogata is the ‘true heir’ of Hanazawa inheriting his military and [some] leadership skills as he stood on the watch tower in Barato ordering the random gangsters how to fight effectively.  Yuusaku is a disappointment for Hanazawa - he can only save face by having his son become such a symbolic part of the army.

I laughed at the next page where Kikuta confirms that Hiro is colluding with the young heiress to steal Yuusaku’s virginity and thus preventing him from becoming a flag bearer.  I love the posture of the terrified Yuusaku!

However, Hiro’s plan has been found out by Hanazawa and he consulted with the leader of the 1st Division to assist him with resolving this unpatriotic and embarrassing issue.  Recall that Ogata was born as a result of Hanazawa being posted to Tokyo - this implies that he likely became good friends with the leader of the 1st Division during this time.

To prevent anyone from identifying Sugimoto, he’s the perfect substitute for Yuusaku and changes into Kikuta’s uniform.  He’s one of those guys who just has that look.  Sugimoto immediately thinks that since he’s been treated well by Kikuta, joining the military might be a good way to find security - in food.  However, we get a link of the cap to Kikuta and what appears to be his dying younger brother.

Kikuta looks so sad, like there is something unfortunate with Sugimoto’s statement of food.  We don’t get to see his expression, indicating he’s likely hiding his emotions from Sugimoto and instead tells Sugimoto he’s going to have to train him in food etiquette.

He’s presented with some Western cuisine, something that may blow his cover and something that Kikuta didn’t expect as he watches from a tree outside.  But again, due to his extreme luck, he’s able to use nervousness as an excuse and it gives him time to state his family his super traditional so they wouldn’t have eaten food like this.  When he’s removed the cap, Kaneko Kaeko is smitten with his handsome face. He can use his excuse as a way to have an out for not knowing how to eat that tasty ebi fry (why to I hear ‘ebi fry’ in Nyanko-sensei’s voice?).

As she explains the fancy places she’s dined at, Sugimoto thinks about how he was living off of cat food.  Cue another reason why he just hates on Ogata, since he was stealing food from Ogata’s people! 

The rest of the dinner goes well, and Kikuta checks in with him.  Meanwhile, our wealthy heiress is completely smitten with him!

As Sugimoto mulls over the idea of a somewhat arranged marriage as a negative he spills the beans about Toraji and Umeko.  And Kikuta isn’t having any of his bullshit.  I love how Kikuta points out how selfish and downright stupid Sugimoto is being in all of this.  Kikuta gives Sugimoto good advice - which he’s clearly still never followed.

He makes it clear that he’s got to give up on that hometown and move on.  Which will be completely ignored as Toraji will end up in the 1st Division with Sugimoto in the trenches.  I’m now wondering how Toraji and Sugimoto reconnected.  Hrrrmmmmm?  Is this something that Sugimoto encouraged and that’s why he has all of these unresolved emotions about Toraji’s death in the war?

The chapter reveals to us that Tsukishima’s love ended up marrying the cousin of Kaeko, making Tsukishima’s acceptance of her ‘death’ even more heartbreaking as he thought that Tsurumi had lied to him about her fate.  [weeps bitterly]. 

As Kikuta and Sugimoto discuss what appears to be Yuusaku’s lack of a free will, he’s told not to meddle in others concerns.  What does Sugimoto do? The man just can’t keep to himself and he goes and finds Yuusaku to confront him.  He wants to know if Yuusaku wants to be a flag bearer even though it is a death sentence.  How does that conversation go? Just how we’d expect with all of the information we know about Yuusaku.

I love how he’s like it isn’t to meet my father’s expectations!  It is because understand my father’s convictions and fight for my country.  Okay, you keep telling yourself that Yuusaku, but it still sounds like you are doing this for your father, you know tomay-to, tomah-to.  Sugimoto mulls over what Yuusaku would choose if given the choice.  I just sigh as we know enough about Yuusaku’s backstory that the man only does what his father says - with great conviction. All of our Ogata flashbacks have made this so clear, Yuusaku is a doomed man from the moment he entered the army.  Maybe even a doomed man from his birth even.  Perhaps, he’s acutely aware of this, but based on how freakkin’ awkward he’s with Ogata and his older brother actions, I continue to think he’s not the brightest bulb in the pack and can only be used as a patriotic pawn.

Yuusaku then becomes suspicious of Sugimoto’s line of inquiry and realizes that he’s got Kikuta’s cap.

Not sure how to respond, he runs away and we learn that Kikuta’s younger brother died of illness during the first Sino-Japanese war.   That same war that killed Koito’s older brother and that Tsurumi and Tsukishima fought in as well. With the statement of illness, I know what most likely killed Kikuta’s younger brother - malnutrition - specifically beri beri.  As the Japanese military rapidly modernized using European models, they ran into an issue with many soldiers and sailors dying of some sort of mysterious illness and it wasn’t something that impacted the Westerners at all.  Most of this has to do with the ability to eat white rice which was much more processed.  It made it more expensive, but was nutritionally bad for men who came from lower incomes or poverty.  Remember how stoked Asirpa was when she ate white rice all the way back at the herring fishery?  If anyone has read “House of Five Leaves” by Natsume Ono, you’d know the protagonist is a poor ronin and he falls ill due to beri beri.  The solution was to return to the countryside/hometown to eat a more diverse diet.  For a more detailed explanation of how bad this was for the Japanese military check out the video by Linfamy on youtube here.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IzIBpFDRr5g

The video even highlights the fierce (and counterproductive) competition between the Army and Navy which has already been well defined through Koito’s backstory. The chapter ends with Sugimoto dropping the cap and the polite man who picks it up for him is Tsurumi with Ogata, Usami and Tsukishima in Tokyo. The plot thickens . . . somehow Sugimoto got mixed up in the business of the 27th and apparently Tokyo isn’t a vast city that you can get lost in and everyone knows everyone.  Like how I was on flight to Saskatoon and the man next to me started up a conversation how he was from Burlington and went to Guelph and my friend who I was going to visit was also from Burlington and went to Guelph it is a small world kinda moment and in agriculture.  I digress though.  Things are starting to pull back together but I’m still not 100% on with this plot direction/story arc.

[sylversmith]

ShikaTema FanFiction Recommednations

Hey all. As many of you know, I’m an unapologetic ShikaTema fan. Although I’ve been writing fanfiction for several years, I’ve been reading it for much much MUCH longer and amassed a pretty long list of favorites across multiple platforms. At the request of a few friends, I finally took the time to put together a list of fic recommendations for my all time favorites.

The list is arranged in three categories- Canon, canon compliant (for the most part) through Naruto chapter 700 and the light novels (note: it will not be guaranteed to be compliant with Boruto content); Canon Divergent, pretty much all fics that feature them in the Naruto universe, but vary in terms of how they get together or major events in the manga; and Alternate Universe, everything else outside of the Naruto universe.  Ratings are assigned per the fanfiction.net guidelines and stories are organized in alphabetical order. Every entry will include the title with an embedded link to the original fic, the author, the story status (if not complete), the word count, the rating, and the author’s summary (occasionally edited by me for relevance and length).

A few notes:

Story titles that are bolded mean that they are one of my all time favorites and would highly HIGHLY recommend.

I only selected stories that feature ShikaTema as the main pairing. Some stories in this list do have other side pairings that I have not tagged. Note: If you are interested in other story favorites that feature ShikaTema as a side pairing, feel free to reach out to me and let me know. I am not currently planning on posting a follow up for fics like that, but if there is enough interest, I could change my mind

I tried my best to stick with completed fics or collections of independent oneshots. However, there are a few incomplete (aka abandoned) and in progress fics that I included, and marked accordingly.

At the end, I include a short list of my very favorite ShikaTema authors with links to their profile pages so you can check out some of their other stories (you’ll see that my list has a bunch of their work included).

MOST IMPORTANTLY: I specifically tried to populate this list with older fics that newer fans (or even some older fans) may not recognize, and catered to my own reading taste. As with any list, there are still plenty of incredible fics on ff.net and AO3 that are not listed here. I strongly encourage anyone who enjoyed these fics to show their love for the pairing by continuing to read, favorite/kudos, and review/comment fics that are posted.

Without further ado, let’s jump into it!

Canon

4,572 Days Later by therewithasmile (18,961) K+ : Post-canon shikatema drabble collection.

The 700th by glockcourage (11,368) K+ : No summary

Approximation by lollipop-mania (9,035) T : Some nights — usually nights, but occasionally during the day too — he catches her looking at him.

Attunement by Eclipse Shadows (17,084) T : Temari is halfway through her pregnancy when she runs into a little problem. The type of problem that involves explosions and destruction by her own hand, and it's not even on purpose! 

Family Life by Aspire2B (141,527) T : A collection of oneshots centered on Shikamaru and Temari's lives post chapter 699.

Father’s Brains and Mother’s Attitude by Kimiz (1,435) K+ : Shikadai might have his father's looks and brains, but he's got a little more Temari in him than she would have thought.

Lazy Love by existence555 (9,755) T : Love doesn't get more dysfunctional than this. Then again, it doesn't get more passionate either. Drabbles, all 100 words and under.

The Nara Family by SpicedGold (80,848) Ratings Vary : A series of loosely related stories about the Nara family. All canon compliant, and all can be read independently of one another. (Author tries) to update this series at least once a month.

The Penny Drops by KuriQuinn (1,697) T : After the misunderstanding at the inn and hot spring, Shikamaru comes to a rather belated realisation about a certain Suna kunoichi.

Wrong Things, Right Things by Jayne Foyer (15,667) T : When assassins are sent to dispose of the Kazekage's heir, Shikadai Nara, his parents devise a plan to keep him safe. Said plan may or may not involve a permanent move to Suna. Shikadai doesn't like the plan, but if it's the only thing that'll keep him safe, he doesn't get a choice.

Canon Divergent

39 Days by Mussimm (52,702) (Incomplete) T : A challenge, a deadline and a mission. Fire and Wind are intertwined, the fate of their people will be decided in 39 Days.

59 Moves by Oh Dee (4,120) T : It only took fifty nine moves for checkmate.

A Prickly Pair by Endoh (10,252) T : Shikamaru tries his damnedest to ensure Temari’s first birthday they spend together is perfect…but life has a way of turning the best intentions upside-down.

Addiction by Ash2Ash (Incomplete) (200,535) M : "I can stop anytime I want to." Not a fluffy story because neither Shikamaru nor Temari appear to be purposely fluffy people. Watch them grapple with reality and either sink or swim.

An Interesting Engagement by Picture (17,185) T : A series of unrelated one-shots, each resulting in the engagement of Shikamaru and Temari

Arranged by PSITeleport (Incomplete) (96,545) T : Shikamaru has a mission to Suna, which must be completed before Tsunade's death. But there's more in store for him than a six-day round-trip and a paycheck.

The Bend and Snap by SunaPrincess7 (12,132) T : Temari decides to teach Hinata how to woo Naruto- unfortunately for Shikamaru, using him as her model.

Candlelight by DrErrRedclaw (6,305) M : How much do you do for someone when you're not even in love?

Catch 22 by Lotos-Eater (32,342) T : Temari has a problem: she wants to marry this guy, but he happens to belong to another hidden village. Shikamaru has a problem: he wants his girlfriend in his bed, but she keeps insisting that she lives somewhere else. How to fix this?

Changing Her Mind by Violetnightshade (22,768) M :  Shikamaru's relationship with Temari crossed beyond the boundaries between ninja years ago; such a bond is a major liability, and must be handled appropriately. Ironically, it's Temari who makes the logical choice.

Collide by SunaPrincess7 (3,879) T : The thing about war is that it makes you think.

Curious by spiritedarray (9,367) M : You didn't make love in the ANBU, you made war. ANBU AU

Dear Kishimoto, You Can Bite Me by PSITeleport (8,175) T : Shikamaru and Temari are trapped in a hopeless scenario. It doesn't matter how smart Shikamaru is, or how strong Temari is, there's one man that has all the power. And, this time, it may very well be game over.

Endgame by spiritedarray (8,539) M : "Then why don't we play a game?" he offers, knowing she'd be hard-pressed to refuse such an enticing invitation. "Seduce me, I dare you. Give it your best shot. Make me sorry I ever broke up with you."

Embracing the Inevitable by PSI Teleport (14,073) T : A moment of impulse leaves Temari with a lifetime of responsibility and a confession to make. A story about women, accepting the paths of life that cannot be avoided.

Flat Irons, Makeup, and Mayhem by Twi-Smile (16,576) M : A girls night at Ino's house in which, Sakura, TenTen and Hinata led by Ino try to get the truth out of Temari about her relationship with Shikamaru.

Heartbeat by Mussimm (34,510) M : She wasn't fooling me. I had seen her turn a square kilometre of forest into firewood. There was nothing modest or sweet about Temari, she was pure destruction disguised by a curvaceous figure and an eloquent tongue.

The Hero She Deserves by BlackMajjicDuchess (14,616) M : Several years into the Great Ninja War, death is almost a certainty. In her desperation to feel alive, Temari has given over to random carnal encounters in the anonymity of darkness, but Shikamaru is the only man she ever wanted. Staying alive is priority number one, but all bets are off when the war is over... if it ever ends.

In Memoriam T by SunaPrincess7 (7,369 - Angst) T : "I hold it true, whate'er befall; I feel it when I sorrow most; 'tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all." A rebuttal.

Inside the Black Ant by Troublesome Shikamaru Fan (11,064) T :  Temari knows how to conceal her emotions, but everyone has a limit...and Kankuro thinks it's time she exceeds hers. Poor, poor Shikamaru...

Intertwining Fate by glockcourage (176,173) T : The Kazekage wanted his first born to be male, forcing the medic to make a switch. Years later, the secret of the past still linked the Kazekage's lazy son and the Nara's blonde daughter.

It’s All in Your Head by heimai (17,923) M : Nara Shikamaru is 100% prepared to someday find his girl that isn't too ugly and not too pretty, and does his best to keep his distance from Temari during her stay in the Hidden Leaf because he Does Not care and he Does Not like her. Unfortunately for Shikamaru, he can't control his dreams, and they seem to be telling him the exact opposite.

Me and My Shadow by DrErrRedclaw (2,414 - Angst) M : Temari, Black Queen of the Sands, and an anniversary she'd rather forget.

Mistake by lollipop-mania (3,329 - Angst) M : If a mistake is only supposed to happen once, why do they keep making it?

On Beating the Learning Curve by Thinkette (2,562) M : "I'll be damned if some other woman came along and gathered the fruits of my labor." Exploring Shikamaru Nara's romantic life through the eyes of his troublesome woman. "It made me realize that he was no longer that clumsy boy fumbling with my underwear."

Playing Cupid by A.Pevensie (7,180) T : They say God helps those who help themselves, but for the clueless or lazy, Yamanaka Ino is happy to provide her services as a matchmaker. Shikamaru and Temari are her first project - they just don't know it yet.

Prisoner by lollipop-mania (6,681 - Angst) M : She was never meant to be his prisoner, it wasn't his job and it sure as hell wasn't his interest. But, there she was after almost ten years, cuffed.

Recent Photo by PSITeleport (5,566) T : What starts out as a normal, administrative operation turns into a rather stimulating game. But who will the real winner be?

The Rules by lafolleconnasse (21,871) M : This wasn’t how their game was played. The game that the two of them had been playing for who knows how many years, the game that the two of them liked to pretend didn’t exist, but they both knew had clear and well-established rules.

Serenade by kimi no vanilla (2,747 - Angst) M : There is an old saying in the Nara family: Don't walk with the shadows for too long, or you'll become one.

Shadowplay and Hurricanes by CosmicStorm14 (Incomplete) (58,123) M : Follows Shikamaru’s and Temari’s volatile on/off relationship, which also includes encounters with other characters in later chapters. Some fluff, mostly smut. Alternating POV.

They Are Good At Many Things by lollipop-mania (46,340) M : So, dating wasn't exactly their thing, but that didn't mean they weren't good, well, GREAT at other things. A series of one-shots describing moments in Shikamaru and Temari's relationship.

Three Days by Lotos-Eater (14,185) M : The Nara doth protest too much, methinks.

Three Simple Words by Starving Lunatic (9,002) T : Three words change the course of Shikamaru and Temari's relationship.

Troublesome Crybabies by ichilover3 (13,177) T : He was beyond lazy. She was beyond troublesome. It was beyond love. A series of oneshots.

Tsuris by NessieGG (2,768) M : They played each other every time, both physically and mentally.

Zombie Plague by wingedmercury (36,820) T : "Temari, there's no such thing as the Zombie Plague," Kankuro mutters. "You're wrong," she rasps. "I'm definitely a plague victim." Her hands tremble as she dry heaves; she would rather die of the Zombie Plague than be pregnant.

Alternate Universe

A Nameless Fic Because Shikamaru Said So by Oh Dee (72,858) M : Shikamaru thinks high school is troublesome enough without a foreign exchange student. Temari thinks hell is bad enough without a pineapple haired lazy ass. Funny how things work out

A Stupid Excuse for a Fairy Tale by TaintedMoonlight (41,954) T : Princes aren’t real, but demons are; kingdoms fall, but others are discovered. The heroine shines and everyone else dulls. Modern day fairy tales are hard to come across and this one isn’t one at all.

The Anecdotes by SunaPrincess7 (38,669) T : "Life is something to do when you can't get to sleep." The moments in Shikamaru's life when he is not asleep. Drabbles

Blue Notebook by LalaMoped (8,330) T : She didn't know who he was, but read his notebook anyway. Is it possible to fall in love with someone based solely on how they write?

C Plus by viiisenya (68,148) T : Temari met his eyes as soon as she bit down onto her fork. Greatness echoed Asuma’s voice, sending a chill down his spine. She grinned at him, something candid and believing, leaning forward slightly. “And, just so you know,” her voice was hushed as if she was telling him a secret, “a C+ GPA doesn’t condemn you to a C+ life.”

Candyman by Coelha-chan (2,559) T : There's nothing more dangerous than a boy with charm. Sakura, Ino, Shiho, and Tayuya discuss the merits of Shikamaru.

Chains by Valerie Sabrina Verzoe (91,437) M : The Suna Princess left her homeland when the Konoha army invaded. She fell into the hands of the Konoha army and ended up a courtesan in a magnificent manor, where she met the lazy genius of Konoha. Where will the chains of fate lead her? And what sinister plans lurk in the grandeur of the city? Will Suna rise again?

Coffee Shop Soundtrack by viiisenya (Incomplete) (55,795) T : In his four years of coffee making, he had never made a mistake. So, when that Bothersome Blonde he’d never seen before came trudging to the counter complaining about her order being made wrong, Shikamaru couldn’t help getting irrationally defensive and argue with her. It also didn’t help that she happened to be the most beautiful woman he’d ever seen in his entire life.

The Desert and the Deer by nahra (28,187) M : Shikamaru has no idea how long he’s been a death god. All the lives he’s taken have become a blur, the faces a haze. Until he’s sent to kill the wind witch Temari. She recognizes him for what he is and immediately invokes the Laws of Old, forcing him into a dangerous gamble that changes everything.

How the Prince Met the Girl, How He Lost Her by Oh Dee (52,348) T : Prince Shikamaru has no intention of getting married or taking over the throne, but when certain circumstances give him no choice, he decides to make a plan that will have his future wife running for the hills.

The Levels on Which We Lie by pearlsong (Incomplete) (65,667) M : College is a drag, but it doesn't have to be. (Alternatively, two dumb geniuses playing relationship chicken)

Slave by SunaPrincess7 (Incomplete) (71,542) M : Suna has lost the war. Badly. Temari is captured and taken to Konoha as a slave. There she ends up working for a rich family, the Nara's.

What It Takes to Make Her Smile by TaintedMoonlight (23,449) T :  Not every fairy lives a happy life. Not every curse is made to last. Not every girl is doomed to laugh. They say she cannot smile for if she does, then she must grant any wish her jester chooses to bequeath and her life will fade with every wish.

Notable Authors

DrErrRedclaw (ff.net)

Lollipop-mania (ff.net) or Lollipopmania (AO3)

Lotos-Eater (ff.net)

Mussimm (ff.net)

PSITeleport (ff.net)

SpicedGold (AO3)

Spiritedarray (ff.net)

SunaPrincess7 (ff.net)

[passionate-reply]

In this installment of Great Albums, we’re back to talking about albums nobody’s ever heard of! You might not know who Zaine Griff is, but you’ve probably heard of a guy called Hans Zimmer, and Zimmer is the real mastermind of this record: a masterpiece of New Romantic synth-pop made long before he made his name composing for the big screen! Not to mention contributions from Ultravox’s Warren Cann, YMO’s Yukihiro Takahashi, and even Kate Bush. Find out all about it by watching this video, or reading the full transcript below the break!

Welcome to Passionate Reply, and welcome to Great Albums! Today’s installment is going to feature an album that is most definitely towards the obscure side--but, like most of the more obscure artists and albums I’ve talked about, I think this one is every bit as good as the classics. Zaine Griff’s Figures is not only a forgotten album that I think deserves more acclaim, but also an album that, in many ways, feels like it could have been a huge success in its own time.

Zaine Griff grew up in New Zealand, and moved to Great Britain in the 1970s in the hopes of pursuing a career in music. His debut LP, 1980’s Ashes & Diamonds, would mark him as one of the many artists straddling the musical landscape in the aftermath of glam, in the long shadow of David Bowie. With keen visual panache, a suave way of slurring when he sang, and the requisite killer cheekbones, Griff fit in perfectly with the so-called “New Romantics,” as stylish and sophisticated as Visage, Ultravox, or Japan.

Music: “Ashes & Diamonds”

The real turning point in Griff’s career was his being “discovered,” so to speak, by Hans Zimmer and Warren Cann. Cann had already become a figure of some renown, as the percussionist for the aforementioned Ultravox. Despite his tremendous fame today, Zimmer actually had much less to show for himself at this point, aside from a somewhat dodgy stint in the Buggles. While geniuses in their own ways, neither of them were necessarily natural frontmen, and Zaine Griff seemed like the perfect missing piece to fit into their pop ambitions.

Even setting aside Zimmer and Cann, Figures is actually full of recognizable talent, and I think it may have the single most stacked list of album credits I’ve ever seen in my life! You’ll also hear contributions from Yellow Magic Orchestra’s Yukihiro Takahashi, backing vocals from Linda Jardim, who was also the soprano on the Buggles’ famous “Video Killed the Radio Star,” and a guest appearance by none other than Kate Bush. That’s really a lot of clout going around, which is one of the reasons I’m so surprised this album went nowhere. Anyway, that aside, the most dominant sonic footprint on display here is certainly that of Hans Zimmer. Zimmer is credited with producing the album, and his dynamic, expressive, perhaps “cinematic” work with digital synthesisers is surely the driving force behind Figures’s sound.

Music: “Fahrenheit 451”

It’s easy to imagine “Fahrenheit 451” is the thumping theme to some delightfully 80s adaptation of Ray Bradbury’s classic novel. Its theme of lustful but dangerous romance is a constant throughout the album, most notably on tracks like “Hot” and the haunting closer, “The Beating of Wings.” The song’s tense and dramatic mood is well bolstered by those soaring synths, courtesy of the Fairlight CMI. One of the most distinctive sounds of mid-80s synth-pop, the soft, breathy tones of the Fairlight hadn’t yet reached full saturation when Figures was made--Zimmer was an early adopter of this particular musical revolution. You might be surprised to learn that “Fahrenheit 451” only saw minor distribution as a single, exclusively for the French and Belgian markets. I think that sort of mismanagement on behalf of Polydor really shafted this album. Its lead single was actually its title track.

Music: “Figures”

The title track of Figures isn’t the worst song I’ve ever heard, but I do think it just might be the worst song on this album. With a strident, stabbing synth riff and a somewhat sparse and anemic soundstage, the title track is not particularly exciting, and also not particularly representative of what the rest of the album sounds like, with no indication of the lush and vibrant textures that dominate tracks like “Fahrenheit 451.” It also has less lyrics than the other tracks, and offers Griff little opportunity to demonstrate his pipes. Thematically, though, its imagery of wispy and mysterious personas, flitting in and out of substance in a world where appearance and identity are trifling and ephemeral, is something that resonates strongly with the album as a whole, as one might surmise from its title also being used for the album. “The Vanishing Men,” another song that easily feels like a better single than “Figures,” handles the same sort of subject in a more playful and upbeat manner.

Music: “The Vanishing Men”

The titular “vanishing men” are quite clearly the life of the party here, and in the world of this track, the insignificance of true identity is portrayed as an invitation to experiment and have fun with it--though not without a slight hint of danger as well. Perhaps it’s a good metaphor for the curated aestheticism of the New Romantic movement, decried by some as “style over substance.” New Romanticism really didn’t have much time left by the time *Figures* came out, being so strongly associated with trends in fashion that were on their way out by this point. Even Ultravox would find themselves pivoting towards more of a pop rock-oriented sound for their final classic lineup LP, 1984’s Lament. I can’t help but think that the changing landscape of musical trends is part of the poor reception of Figures, which is such a consummate New Romantic album, which basks in the full flush of the movement’s prior penetration into the mainstream. As stated above, “The Vanishing Men” is all about the glamour of mutable identity, but other tracks on the album seem to assign this theme a bit more weight, as in “The Stranger.”

Music: “The Stranger”

The titular character of “The Stranger” is described as “a stranger to himself,” but also “no stranger to anyone else.” This track seems to be more focused on the negative aspects of fashionable persona-play: losing the dignity and security of a true form, the people around you seeing through your charades, and becoming trapped in an existence defined by arbitrariness and artificiality. I’d also be remiss not to mention this track’s winsome pentatonic synth riff, which helps create a mercurial and ambiguous mood. It might be interpreted as a nod towards the rampant Orientalism of New Romantic music, which ran with the early 80s verve for all things Asian, and wasn’t shy about appropriating “Asiatic” musical motives like pentatonic scales to evoke mystery and wonder. Griff and friends’ use of such here is relatively subtle, though, and perhaps a bit more tactful than how many of their contemporaries approached other musical ideas associated with the East.

The unforgettable cover of Figures is as dramatic and infused with capital-R Romantic sentiment as the music contained within. Above the text relating the artist and title, which uses a V for a U for a touch of the classical, we see Griff splayed dramatically in a pond of lilies. With sharp makeup that emphasizes his lips, and a diaphanous, blousy top that turns translucent in the water, he seems to be the perfect tragic hero of some lost work of Shakespeare’s--complete with another flower stylishly pinned to his chest. As I mentioned before, Figures is an album that rides the wave of New Romanticism particularly hard, and I think its cover is yet another symptom of those sensibilities.

Speaking of Shakespeare, I can’t help but want to compare this image with a famous painting of one of Shakespeare’s best-known characters: Ophelia, by Sir John Everett Millais. Painted in the early 1850s, Millais’s Ophelia depicts the moment where Ophelia, driven mad by Hamlet’s romantic rejection of her, drowns herself in a river. It’s exactly the kind of story of wild, passionate, and doomed love portrayed on tracks like “Fahrenheit 451.” Ophelia is also associated strongly with flowers in the text, and features in a particularly memorable scene where she doles out various symbolic blossoms to members of the royal court. Besides the affinity of subject matter, even the composition of Millais’s work resembles the cover of Figures, contrasting its subject’s pale skin with the dark and murky natural surrounds, and emphasizing the drapery of their wettened attire. Ophelia is often considered the definitive masterpiece of the short-lived art movement, the “Pre-Raphaelite Brotherhood,” who, as their name implies, sought to recapture the intuitive, colourful, and emotive power of art created prior to the High Renaissance. Not unlike New Romanticism, the Pre-Raphaelite movement would crumble after only a few years, but not without leaving behind a trail of masterpieces that would continue to inspire future artists and admirers, far removed from their own time.

After the release of Figures, Zaine Griff remained involved with Hans Zimmer and Warren Cann, and, as the supergroup “Helden,” they embarked on an even more ambitious musical opus together: Spies, a sort of synth-pop oratorio about immortal Nazi super-spies falling in love in a futuristic dystopia. Spies is about as out-there as it sounds, and brings the flamboyant musical excess of Figures into a suitably theatrical setting. It’s also got nearly as star-studded of a cast as Figures, featuring not only Zimmer, Cann, and Jardim again, but also Eddie Maelov of Eddie & Sunshine as a mad scientist, and the enigmatic French electro-cabaret chanteuse Ronny, in the role of a super-computer with a sultry female voice. Griff portrays one of the titular immortal spies, known only as “The Stranger”--which, of course, begs comparison to the track of the same name on Figures, and prompts the question, to what extent was Spies already in the works when *Figures* was being written and recorded?

Music: “The Ball”

We all know the rest of the story for Hans Zimmer, who began working with music for film in the mid-1980s, such as the queer cult classic My Beautiful Laundrette. But Zaine Griff obviously never became a household name. Despite being finished in 1983, Spies never got to see an official release, as it was a bit too out there for a label to take a chance on at the time, and it would probably be lost media today if it weren’t for a vinyl bootleg that’s thankfully fairly easy to find online. Griff decided to retire from music shortly after this, and recounts a story of having walked past an extremely talented street musician, and having a sort of epiphany about just how hard it was to make it in music. After all, if a true virtuoso could end up busking on the street, how fair and rewarding could the industry possibly be? Disillusioned with the world of pop, Griff returned to his native New Zealand and got a day job as a golf instructor. More recently, though, he’s also released several new solo albums in the 2010s, surprisingly enough, and attempted to push forward into some very contemporary-sounding pop rock. The world is, of course, a very different place nowadays than it was in the 20th Century, and particularly in the world of music distribution, so perhaps it makes sense that our brave new world has room in it for someone like Zaine Griff to return.

My overall favourite track on Figures is probably “Time Stands Still,” which I think is perhaps the most accessible, pop-friendly track to be had on the album, and the one I would’ve released as the lead single had I worked for Polydor. With a big hook and simple, repetitive lyrics, it’s a true pop song through and through--though, if an artist releases a commercial-sounding album in the woods, and nobody is around to buy it, is it still really “pop?” Anyway, I also love this track’s delightful outro, imitating a skipping record to represent a freeze in the flow of time...though I admit it’s a lot less harrowing to hear when listening digitally! That’s all I have for today--thanks for listening.

Music: “Time Stands Still”

[vrykoolart]

Saint Seiya Question Game

Tagged by: @siberianxbreaks​

-- Thank you for the tag, my friend! --

Remove my answers and put yours under the questions!

How did you find out about Saint Seiya?

My sister is actually a huge fan of Saint Seiya, so I found out about from her. We actually watched it when we were kids. I don’t have that vivid of a memory about it, but I do know the one I recall watching is the ADV dub. I remember how deep they made Hyoga’s voice and that’s it.

But my sister really loved it and I’d watch with her. One day, it kinda disappeared and because we live in the United States—y’all probably know what I mean— It was really hard to find it at all. So for years, my sister was trying to track it down and she dabbled into the other series related to it a little bit. It wasn’t until last year that we finally found it thanks to Netflix and we watched it all with our entire family. I saw the first season with the new dub and was immediately obsessed with it. I enjoyed every second of watching the whole thing. It kills me that we don’t have the Hades arc dubbed yet and I hope we get it soon.

I watched Lost Canvas, too, and loved it as well. Albafica made me love it and the El Cid’s episodes were really top notch for me. I love his voice. I love his character. I think he’s literally the coolest thing ever. I delved into the manga and I just love Lost Canvas. It has some weird stuff here and there, but I adore it. I hope one day we get a season three because it’s truly that good.

I just really love Saint Seiya & I’m so glad that it exists. Truly. I don’t remember having that much fun watching an anime since like watching Death Note, Soul Eater, Sgt. Frog, and like—Azumanga Daioh... all for different reasons, of course.

Who’s your favorite character and why?

When I started watching the show again, it was Shun. He’s so adorable and his heart is so big. I love how sweet and strong he is. I have a soft spot for Shun honestly. The more I watched it, I really started to just adore all the Bronze Saints, too.

But another character I really adore is Cancer Deathmask. He’s so charismatic and fun. I really adore the voice they gave him in the Netflix English dub, too. He killed it. I just absolutely am in love with him. Yes, he committed several crimes. Yes, he has killed numerous people. Yes, his temple looks like a Mortal Kombat stage... but it truly builds character. He’s my husband and I think we’re all allowed to make as choices ever now and then.

Who’s your absolute hate-character and why?

Tatsumi. I hate how he never faced the consequences for anything he did. He literally abused those children—Ikki, more-so, and he sent him to Death Queen to DIE. He’s never shown signs to change really. They just treat him like a crack/comedy character and it irks me because he deserved to get beat for what he did at least. Wish he would have literally got tortured or fired. Anything at all, but they just prepare like nothing happen and he continues being an ass-wipe.

I don’t care for Kido either because even if he took Saori and raised her, he never did much to stop the countless abuse the children went under and knowing sent the children away to die. No, even in the manga, I don’t see it as a noble sacrifice to literally sacrifice most of your children to fulfill a destiny. Even if they were just sent away, he literally could have prevented Tatsumi from abusing them and raised Saori better. No matter how you look at it, he’s a shit person, too. Yes, he helped them become saints but the way he did it will never feel right to me. He separated Seiya from his sister and told him he’d only see her again if he became a saint, knowing full well he couldn’t even guarantee that. That emotional manipulation is toxic and cruel to do to a child—an in the manga—your own son. Like ew,,,,, I don’t like the children aspect in the manga, but with that considered still, he’s still a horrible person and I wish Saori would stop hailing him as a good guy.

Shippings you like and why you ship them?

Shaina/Seiya — In my heart, they are the canonical pairing. They really do protect each other and care deeply for one another. Seiya reacts strongly every time she gets hurt and Shaina is always doing her best to protect/defend him. They’re both strong in their own right and they both have a deeper connection to each other. Even when Shaina tried to hide her feelings because she felt there is no way they could be together and tried to kill him, you could tell she really couldn’t do it because she really cared about him. He really cares about her, too, which makes them so perfect for each other. They are each other’s strength and they push each other to become better & stronger

Marin/Aiolia — They’re really cute when they interact with each other and I’m pretty sure they’re an actual canon pair. They really care and confine in one another. I just honestly adore seeing them interact. They never really got to tell each other how they feel, but I’m sure they both know. I wish she would have gotten some more time with him because it’s kinda sad that she’s all alone now. ;;

Freya/Hägan —Hägan clearly loved her, but due to the strictness of loyalty in their culture, he couldn’t bring himself to betray Hilda. It upsets me what happened to them because they deserved to be happy. Poor Freya & Hägan. A lovely couple but terribly tragic. Hägan clearly misunderstood Hyoga & Freya’s relationship and must have thought that Freya loved him even in reality the only person she really loved was him and that is what breaks my heart. I was on the Freya and Hyoga train until Hägan showed up. Now, I can’t bring myself to ship them without feeling bad.

Hilda/Siegfried — Siegfried did everything for her and, in the end, he died because he believed in Hilda’s true vision. He wanted to doing nothing more than protect her and he died to help do so. It’s beautiful yet so tragic.

Hyoga/Eri — They’re just extremely cute together. I really loved their interactions. They deserve happiness and the entire world.

Ikki/Esmeralda — If you ignore that weird ass Shun thing, they’re cute. That should have never been a thing. I ignore it to hell and back but I do think they’re adorable and I feel for Ikki.

Shun/June — She only shows up once like why??? But they’re so adorable together. I wish we could see them both more, but unfortunately, she disappeared into the ether. I do believe she is perfect for Shun, tho.

Me/Deathmask — OTP. He’s my husband.

Shippings you don’t like/hate and why you dislike them?

Adult/Minor pairings.

Incest pairings.

Saori/Seiya — I don’t feel like Seiya likes her that way. I think Saori may like him. She’s always shown some special interest in him, but I’m sure Seiya cares about her more so as a goddess and friend than a love interest. Every time I see this ship, Seiya is acting weirdly out of character which really throws me off from the whole ship. Saori has shown to sometimes literally prioritize Seiya over everyone else when dropping Saga’s dead ass body to cradle him... It just rubs me the wrong way??? Seiya cares about her but he doesn’t react nearly as strongly about her as he does with Shaina. I don’t mind it being one-sided. She’s a girl and is allowed to have feelings, but I don’t really see her with anyone. I think she’ll probably grow out of it, but who knows. This ship is just really not my cup of tea.

Your favorite scene.

It’s hard to think of one, but the funniest scene is when they’re in Yomotsu Hirasaka. Deathmask is about to throw Shiryū into the pit, but then Shunrei’s prayers reach him and he gets so annoyed that he telepathically throws her off fucking a cliff. I don’t care. It’s comedy gold. I laughed so hard at that. Deathmask is truly a marvel.

Honorable mention: ❝ Maybe no else has a cloth made of ice that hasn't melted since before the time of... dinosaurs. Or... maybe no one else has powers like me, like the power over snow, ice, and even glaciers. In fact, you know what, Snake Eyes, maybe you should just think of me as your own personal Ice Age Dude! ❞

Your favorite Attack:

Hard question, so I’ll just name attacks I really like: Heaven Dancing Ring, Diamond Dust, Thunder Wave, Specter Punch, Phoenix Wing Ascent, Praesepe Hell Waves, Scarlet Needle Antares, Bloody Rose, Another Dimension, Wolf Cruelty Claw, Great Ardent Pressure, Greatest Caution, Dead End Symphony, and Imperial Phantasm Punch.

If you could decide for which god/goddess you fight, which one you prefer and why?

Athena. Despite liking Poseidon, Odin, Abel, & Poseidon, I like the army she commands the most.

If you could choose a Cloth. Which you would prefer?

Hard question again. I really like the Scorpio Cloth. The head piece is nice. I’m a sucker for the quack on the Cygnus Cloth and the Nemo on the Pisces Cloth, too. It’s honestly hard to choose one, specially if you count God Cloths, too. I did draw myself in the Ophiuchus cloth, so got the sake of this question, Ophiuchus Gold Cloth.

From which country you’re from?

America.

Your favorite season / sequel:

Sanctuary arc and the Asgard arc. Let’s get the money. Both do a fantastic job at world-building and I love them both equally. My favorite spin-off is The Lost Canvas.

[sebastianshaw]

And I’m sure Snowbird getting a happy ending had nothing to do with her being a blonde white woman and Haven being a dark skinned woc

I don’t think it was THE reason, but I would not rule it out as a contributing factor.

The major reason is that Snowbird is a hero and a major character, whereas Haven was an extremely minor character and a villain. So it’s pretty standard in that regard for Snowbird to get a happy ending, and Haven not to. Especially considering that, while Snowbird was not a character that “belonged” to anyone in particuliar, Haven was the creation of DeMatteis and when he left the book, so did she. That’s why her story just ENDS so abruptly after her confrontation with Charles, even though it seems like it should just be getting starting---her creator took off, and the new writer wasn’t interested in her.

She pops back up in the annual a year or two later to die, and I strongly suspect this was due to readers writing in and asking what happened to her; I can’t confirm this for fact, but TV Tropes claimed that fans actually refused to root against her because she was so sympathetic and benevolent, so I imagine a lot of them wanted to know where she went and this was to get them to shut up.

(It kind of reminds me of when this webcomic writer wrote a character he meant as despicable and twisted, and she was, but she was also way more deep and interesting than the 2D mouthpieces the protagonists were, so fans kept asking when she’d come back. He got so fed up he drew her dying in a gross and humiliating way. So yeah, if people were indeed asking “what happened to Haven and her evil possessed fetus?” and writing her dying in the mud giving birth while a goddess victim-blames her was the response...yeah. Again I cannot be for sure this is what happened, it’s just a GUESS.)

But yeah the big reason is Snowbird is a heroine and important, Haven was a flash-in-the-pan villain that only one writer wanted to write and had to be gotten out of the way when someone new came in. Nothing deeper than that. But the WAY that Haven’s story played out, especially compared to Snowbird’s...that’s got a lot of sexism and quite potentially racism there, yeah. So um, let’s get into that. Under a cut for length because I doubt people following a Shaw blog for Shaw want to see a bunch of non-Shaw rambling.

Haven’s story, as I have written about MANY times on her blog, is REALLY UNCOMFY in its sexism, racism, and xenophobia. Let me say, I do not think DeMatteis intended this. He writes Haven as a very kind, well-intentioned person even at her worst, and I happen to know he has a genuine real-life interest in Indian spirituality, which I think is definitely what inspired her. Unfortunately, these good intentions didn’t stop Unfortunate Implications galore: - Our first Indian/Hindu/Zoroastrian character is not only a villain, her “evil” philosophy is taken directly from real-world Hindu beliefs - She is opposed by a team comprised ENTIRELY of white people who work for the US government who scoff at those beliefs and refer to them as “New Age” (aka a white hippie movement that appropriated a lot of actual Hindu ideas but certainly did not invent it!) - The US government says she’s a terrorist. Polaris raises doubts, because Haven’s actions at that point have been nothing but benevolent (she saved Polaris) whereas the same government making these accusations has been malevolent (the people trying to kill/capture Polaris were US agents, despite Polaris working for the government, who attacked her because she had the same energy signal as Magneto) When they go to see Haven in person, she’s preaching peace between humans and mutants. Havok opens fire on her---so basically, a law enforcement officer shooting without warning at an unarmed WOC who isn’t doing anything threatening and they don’t even know has superpowers yet--and Haven has to hit the deck. Despite her own great power that we later learn she has, she never retaliates. But we find out that yes, actually, everything the government said about her is true, she’s leading a terrorist death-cult, and so it’s a-okay that our white government cop FIRED A FUCKING PLASMA BURST AT HER WHEN SHE WAS JUST STANDING THERE. The moral of her story is seriously “this brown woman with a funny religion is a terrorist because the government said so, no matter how nice and gentle she seems, and thus any excessive force against her was definitely justified even if we didn’t know that at the time” like it’s CHILLING. - Haven herself actually has very questionable agency in all this. She’s actually been pregnant for twenty years; her unborn child is permanently in the first trimester and possessed by the powerful demon known as The Adversary (which doesn’t make sense timeline-wise, but I have no doubt this thing can time travel, its entire point is to fuck the rules of universal order) We don’t know exactly how much it can influence her or perhaps even control her, but we do know it’s been talking in her head from 20 years and came on at a time she was REALLY messed up and vulnerable, and manipulated her at the least. I personally think it probably was controlling or influencing her at a very deep subtle level, but that’s just my interpretation. At the least though, again, talking in her head for 20 years, that’s the supernatural equivalent of schizophrenia and we wouldn’t blame her for THAT, right? - Oh, and about it appearing when she was at her lowest, most vulnerable point? Know why she was at her lowest, most vulnerable point just when she happened to be pregnant? Haven’s story is she was born extremely rich but was so passionate about using her privilege to help the poor that she ran away from her parents---philanthropists themselves, but who wanted to protect her from the outside world too---to go work directly in the streets, bathing lepers and cradling dying babies. She got her name “Haven” because she used her wealth to renovate a children’s hospital of the same name, I’m serious. She was literally a fucking SAINT. And then she fell in love with a man, and he used her, knocked her up, and ran off. She was DEEPLY ashamed and berated herself not only for her loss of “purity” but also for being “selfish” and forgetting the children. This is...so sad, and so DEEPLY entrenched in how women, ESPECIALLY women of color in a colonized culture, are considered “selfish” and “evil” if they don’t utterly sacrifice themselves 24/7 to care for others and dare have wants/needs of their own. So she fell into this deep despair and that’s when her fetus starts talking to her and filling her head with twisted lies that preyed on both her devout spirituality and her desire to help others.

There is no more sympathetic villain setup POSSIBLE, you’d think Haven would be a SHOE-IN for a redemption arc or at least being saved from her own “child”, but she gets neither. She dies alone in the mud, having only now realized as the birth is coming just what it is she’s about the bring into the world. Roma, the Omniversal Guardian Goddess and eternal foe of the Adversary, appears to watch. Haven begs her, not to save her own life but to stop the Adversary from the terrible things it’s going to do to the world. To her last breath, her concern is others. And Roma tells her “I would weep for you, but you brought this on yourself.” So basically, Haven, who is the most wonderful person in the world and who VERY much fits expected gender roles (gentle, maternal, loving, non-violent even when attacked, long hair, pink and purple flowing clothes, literally SPARKLES) has sex ONE TIME and she’s punished for it in the worst fucking way while the guy who impregnated her gets off scott-free. It’s just...it’s the worst narrative, in terms of sexism AND racism AND just in general. That’s not even getting into, say, the really uncomfy way her meeting with Xavier is handled, eesh. Compare, Snowbird. She’s actually far LESS the “perfect” woman than Haven is, she’s very cold and aloof and she even contemplates LETTING HER SON DIE so that her ties with mortality will be severed and she can join her divine family in paradise. But she had that son within the confines of MARRIAGE to a mortal man, and she only got married after her duties were done, unlike Haven on both counts. And her loss, and the loss of her child, are deeply mourned by those around her, she has a very dignified and beautiful funeral with Snow White style glass coffins, and we see the spirits of herself, her husband, and her child all ascend to the Inua paradise together, the gods having decided to let them in even though mortals have never been allowed before. She gets divine exception, Haven gets divine condemnation. She gets a beautiful funeral surrounded by loved ones, Haven’s corpse is probably still rotting in the jungle and her brother likely still has no idea what happened to her. To be clear I in no way resent Snowbird for her better treatment in a similiar story, I like Snowbird, but it is very disparate in how differently these seemingly similar situations---possessed baby and such---were handled, and the specific ways in which Haven’s were handled so badly ARE very much the product of bigotry that Snowbird didn’t suffer in part due to her being a white or white-coded character (in addition to being, again, a heroine and a major character, which helped her a lot too) Also, is it just me or is Marvel like...weird around childbirth/babies/motherhood and mixing that with demons/evil spirits/possession? Because in that same vein we’ve also got Madelyne Pryor and Wanda Maximoff who also go through demonic possession that’s related in some way to being mothers of babies. That’s a very strange pattern to have and something’s going on there.   As a note, it bugs me that Snowbird’s human disguise as “Anne McKenzie” is a BLONDE WHITE WOMAN. Like, yes, her human father was white, but her mother Nelvanna is one of the Inua, the ancient gods of Canada from LONG before white people showed up and WHO LOOK LIKE FIRST NATIONS PEOPLE, Snowbird herself is constantly emphasized as a child of these lands, she is literally magically BOUND to these lands and can’t leave them without weakening and dying, she was raised by an indigenous shaman, and she can only turn into animals that are INDIGENOUS to Canada. She is very unsubtly the embodiment of pre-colonial Canada, so it’s just...asinine to me her human form is that of a colonizer. I get they probably didn’t think further than “let’s give her human form blonde hair so it’s recognizably her” but like, that’s the problem, they didn’t THINK. Also I feel like her being mixed would really thematically fit her, since a strong part of her story was struggling between her divine and human heritage and being forced to try to “pick a side” which is something I’ve heard (I’m white) that a lot of irl mixed people deal with. It just would make more SENSE.

[shibalen]

💥hewwo can I pwease get a romantic male matchup for bnha (darkbox bc I live for angst) (music box) when you have the time uwu

Levi he/him gay entp supposedly (also if it's not too much to ask please no characters under the age of 18 please)

I've been described as having a strong and loud personality, I'm extroverted and outspoken. I'm pretty eccentric too.

I value friendship, kindness and standing up for others.

Goal wise I'm pretty aimless. I dont have any goals, if I die well I guess that's it babey. In the meantime I'm just here to help animals and people who need it.

Positive traits: I always stick up for people in need, I'm good at reading people, I'm good with animals, I love to make people smile and laugh, cheerful, good at talking my way out of bad situations, uhm. Friendly!

Negative traits would be: hot headed, loud, stubborn, arrogant, comes across as intimidating:( good at getting into bad situations, gets into fights very often. Can be spiteful, I've been described as a pyromaniac so theres that. Can be sadistic

What pisses me off: my father. I can and will cause trouble for that man for as long as I live. And people who pick on the weak.

My hobbies and interests areeee: true crime babey! Crying over video games, baking, the occult, taking naps, dream interpretations and tarot readings

Likes: animals, cats specifically, stars, fire, sunsets, supposedly haunted places, storms, being dramatic for the hell of it, tormenting people in a good hearted way

Dislikes: uhhhh hot weather I guess.

Quirks: uh I have 5 cats! Ones my fathers but he never takes care of his cat so i pretty much count him as my own (plus he likes me more than my dad and it pisses my dad off hehe) I have weirdly accurate intuition, it makes reading people easy, knowing what they want to hear and what they dont.

Uhhh dates and relationship wise I'm honestly happy doing whatever my s/o wants to do. All I want is to see their face light up.

My love language is physical touch, I dont like touching people but if it's someone I feel strongly about youd have to pry me away from them.

I once got kicked out of a library for starting a fight in it, trashy I know but I wasnt going to stand there and do nothing while my friends were being bullied and pressured into getting involved with a really dodgy man. I scared the bullies off for good at least B) they never bothered my friend again babey

Oh I'm also known around the area I live in as someone who's good at finding homes of lost pets. Often times I come across a lost animal and befriend it in no time and use my connections to find its family.

Sorry if this was rly long and thank you for your time!! I hope you have a fantastic day uwu if anything's too difficult to come up with ideas for I'm more than happy for you to change anything to make it easier for you too!

♡︎ matchup for anon

heya! here i am with another late matchup but i hope you still see this. i'm sorry about the delay (╯_╰)

bnha: i match you with . . .

natsuo todoroki !!

• this was one of those "heureka!" moments for me. you both hate your dads and hot weather? it's a match made in heaven! okay jk, these are just nice add-ons.

• what really made me consider Natsuo were your values and personality. kindness and friendships are important to both of you. Natsuo's a medical student so i am convinced helping others is high on his priority list too. he loves your driven and passionate nature because he doesn't go sugarcoating bs either.

• you're definitely the more energetic one while Natsuo only gets hot-headed about the things that are the most important to him. i think it's a good compromise, you can help each other out :)

• he was a little taken aback and cautious of your explosiveness at first but warmed up to it quickly after learning what a kind person you really were. now he thinks your dramatic attitude is funny during your sillier moments ٩(◕‿◕｡)۶

• speaking of, you lads met at an animal shelter. there had been a dog that was astray in the neighbourhood of his home, so Natsuo, being a responsible boyo, took it to the local shelter.

• then there you were, standing by the help desk with five kittens wrapped in your jacket in your arms. apparently someone had been trying to drown them so you'd taken care of the situation accordingly.

• Natsuo understood jumping into a lake to rescue the poor animals because he would have done the same, but you could have had just called the police?? it was extremely ridiculous but admirable at the same time to beat all those guys up.

• your chat turned into a pleasant conversation afterwards as you were waiting for the animals to finish their check-ups. Natsuo was a bit shy but you didn't mind and kept the chat going which he appreciated.

• later he volunteered to help you look for good homes for the animals you'd both found. during this project the two of you got to know each other quite well and ended up hanging out together afterwards!

• and from that point on, everything fell into place naturally. the growing spark between you was undeniable and you both knew it. Natsuo definitely liked you longer, he was just a lil dense about it . . .

• you're nothing short of a hero in his eyes but dear lord he worries for you. when he's attending lectures he sometimes can't help but wonder if you're all right and not getting involved in anything violent.

• attends to your possible injuries while nagging you not to be so quick to start a fight next time. in return, you playfully bully him for being such a mom.

• you join forces with Fuyumi to pick on him about your relationship. even though you're already together, soft Natsuo still blushes when his affection for you is brought up, it's entertaining for both you and Fuyumi.

• idk if you've heard but Natsuo's 181cm tall!! hugging someone has never been easier even if you happen to be taller than him. the only thing is his skin's naturally kind of chilly so he's lowkey worried if you dislike it but you always assure him he's perfect!

• one time he was stressed over exams so you baked him some blueberry muffins. he gave you the biggest hug and kiss because it's exactly all these little things you do that set his heart racing for you ♡︎

• "last night i saw a dream about being a frog and eating giant flies, it was gross."

• "oh, that just means your love life is about to become fun."

• "i'm not sure how those two are related."

• "just trust me. i'm a pro at this."

• he also likes giving you headpats as much as he likes receiving them! his hands are quite big so he often runs his fingers through your hair when you're cuddling or hugging. it's especially relaxing after a long period of studying. also him carring you on his broad back ԅ(￣ε￣ԅ)

• you enjoy the little things in life and complain about your fathers together. you've agreed to wait a while before even mentioning your relationship to them because, honestly, Natsuo doesn't want any more horrible influences in your life.

• you get him sucked into the world of video games. it's always fun to watch him struggle but he never gets salty about losing maybe a lil he adores your smile as you laugh at him for being so bad at them.

• your dates include: helping out at animal shelters and retirement homes, video game and movie nights (especially about true crime), arcades and astronomy tower explorstions. i feel like Natsuo's more into traditional, romantic and chill dates and that's your usual thing. though i see sometimes you going to get coffee and ending up solving a 50-year-old murder case instead (✧ω✧)

❦︎ ink box

— despite Natsuo's best efforts to distance himself from Endeavor, it wasn't quite as easy and everyone was very much aware of the Todoroki family. and now the son of the number 1 hero had a lover.

— it wasn't actually that troublesome at first. some newpaper paparazzi occasionally annoyed you but you didn't care for them. most of the time Natsuo and you had your peace during dates aside from a few casual fans.

— but of course there are all sorts of people out there, some out for revenge, some for money, and being desperate means using even the lowest of methods to get what you want.

— so one time it happened, and it was all that took. several bitter villains thought they'd get their revenge through you, silly as it may sound. they made a big show of kidnapping you and demanding Endeavor to 'make up' for his wrongdoing. but all got resolved thanks to heroes, the only casualty being Natsuo's heart from almost exploding from worry and his deepening hatred for his father.

— later on, it wasn't that Natsuo was worried about you not being able to handle yourself, he feared what might happen if more of powerful villains came after you.

— so, after some debate, you agreed not to meet up for a short while to let the fuse of the incident settle down. it would be safer once the media forgot about it. you still texted and chatter over phone though!

— but then a week turned into two weeks, then into a month. you were wondering what was taking Natsuo to say the coast was clear and did a straight-up inquiry through a video chat.

— you could see he was restless the entire time. he said you should wait longer just to be sure everything was calm before meeting up. you became irritated because he was obviously lying and not being his normal, brutally honest self.

— why was he giving you this crap straight to your face?

— truthfully, Natsuo hadn't been sleeping all right recently. ever since that day he had reoccurring nightmares about something awful happening to you. they were just dreams, he knew. yet considering his ruffled up past and the frequency of those horrible visions, it would have been lie to say he was unaffected.

— paranoia just wouldn't leave him alone, and no matter how much he wanted to hold you in his arms again and hated making up stupid excuses, the voice at the back of his mind whispered this was for the best.

— after a month and a half had passed you've had just about enough, however. whatever reason he was keeping you in the dark for did no longer stop you from crashing into his house and demanding the truth.

— Natsuo knew you and expected this to eventually happen. after you made such a powerful entrance though he also knew there was no getting around it this time. really, it was comforting knowing you cared so deeply.

— he told you exactly what had been happening and you resisted the urge to punch him in the arm for having such a mindset. but the look in his beautiful grey eyes was so heartbreaking you threw yourself to embrace him instead. your touch was everything Natsuo had craved for for all this time.

— you skillfully assured him for the next couple of hours while keeping the talk light-hearted (he had obviously been overthinking way too much already). soon enough the issue was resolved and you had a sleepover right there to make uo for the lost time (Shoto and Fuyumi kept eavesdropping on you because y'all were being way too loud in a cute way).

— "i love you, Natsu, but if you ever keep something like this a secret from me again, i can't guarantee the safety of your arm or your front door."

♫︎ music box

— If I Had An Airplane by SayWeCanFly

— This December by Rick Montgomery

— Round & Laundry from Carole and Tuesday

— Haven't Had Enough by Marianas Trench

— Bowie On The Radio by Ryan McMullan

♡︎ runner up: Dabi / Touya Todoroki

thank you for requesting, hopefully you enjoyed this! i'm really pleased about matching you with Natsuo, it's just so perfect. have a lovely day and remember to take care of yourself ♡︎

[unpopularly-opinionated]

My friend shared with me this reddit thread where someone outlined a list of features they claim are “missing” from CP2077, and because I’m me and like to rant, I wanted to go through it and agree/disagree based on what I think should or shouldn’t be in the game.

So probably spoilers below, at least for gameplay.

- Walk toggle for keyboard.

Agree.

- Key re-mapping for certain elements.

Agree. The game has some rebinding functions, but not enough to be honest.

- Accessibility features missing (ie: text scaling for menus).

Agree.

- In-game benchmark feature.

Personally, I think this is somewhat extraneous and I wouldn’t knock a game for not having it since most games don’t, but sure if they add it I wouldn’t complain.

- Dash should be a separate key and not a double press of walking key.

HARD agree. It’s beyond me that they thought it was okay to have that as-is, honestly. It makes moving around while sneaking a huge pain because you accidentally dodge which puts you into a standing position which can reveal you easily. At the absolute least, they should disable dodging when crouched, but ideally allow it to be rebound to something else.

- Crouch and skip dialogue should not share the same key.

Again, HARD agree. It’s possible to rebind the key (I certainly did) but something I noticed is that, while the dialogue no longer skips when I press crouch, it doesn’t seem to register the crouch button at all while in dialogue, meaning you can’t uncrouch if in dialogue.

- The minimap is too zoomed in to be helpful in many cases.

I only noticed this as an issue while driving, personally. You’ll be going 90mph down the freeway and not know that your turn is coming up until you’re already 90 miles beyond it. Outside of that, I’m not sure why you’d need the minimap zoomed out but hey if it fixes it while driving, I’m for it. Agree.

- Missing a toggle aim feature.

Quality of life, sure. I won’t use it, but agree.

- Ability to respec attributes (Note: Existing item respecs perks only)

Personally, I disagree with this. I think respeccing perks is fine because some of the perks are kinda lame so I can understand wanting to undo that, but I feel like respeccing attributes would sort of negate the purpose of developing a character a certain way. It makes multiple playthroughs more valid, forcing you to develop your different characters different ways. Sooo disagree.

- Ability to disable objective marker.

Agree. Mild nuisance to be sure, but still a nuisance never the less.

- Ability to lower ADS sensitivity.

Quality of life, sure. Agree.

- Add proper ultrawide (21:9, 32:9) support.

Quality of life, sure. Agree.

- Add loot by area or/and autoloot feature.

Eh... I don’t know. I think there should be a “scrap item” button when looting added but I’m unsure about a loot all or autoloot feature. It’s a change that I personally think falls under “optimizing the play out of the game”. Disagree.

- Add “stash all” feature.

And then some. Inventory management is atrocious in this game, it’s actually unreal how they thought it was okay to ship it like that. You can only manage one item at a time, and the UI needs to completely reload each time you do. It’s obscene. Hard agree.

- Add transparency option for HUD elements.

Quality of life, sure. Agree.

- Add way to remove mods from unequipped weapons.

This was actually sort of news to me. I’ve just been scrapping weapons I unequip with the mods still attached, assuming the mods were just going back to my inventory. Evidently that’s not been the case, but I haven’t actually noticed it as an issue because mods are so frequently found. A bit arguable, to be sure, but I don’t see why guns couldn’t return their mods automatically when dismantled. So agree, I guess.

- Add toggle mouse acceleration.

Quality of life, sure. Agree.

- Driving markers and onscreen trajectory (alternative GPS).

I don’t actually know what this means. Does this mean have the line leading to your objective be in-world as opposed to the minimap? I can maybe see that being a thing, I guess. If that’s the case, agree.

- Body slider customization (height, weight, muscle mass).

Eh...I’m ambivalent on this one. It seems extraneous in that it’s unnecessary and just something someone wants rather than something the game strongly needs, but at the same time, with as much marketing that went into how customizable your character is in this game, it’s sort of depressing how poor the character customization really is. Because of that, part of me wants to agree with this, on the grounds that the game was sort of sold to us this way. So I’ll say I tentatively agree.

- Very few options for some of the character creation features (hair colour, tattoos, skin complexion, scars, etc).

See above.

- Animations for eating and drinking (excluding scripted ones).

The problem with adding animations to consumables is that not only would you need one for each type of consumable but that the animation would then need to completely play out each time, which can give players burnout. Going to have to disagree with this one.

- Unable to remove underwear outside of inventory.

I assume this means giving the player the ability to run around stark naked as opposed to in your underwear, and weirdly enough I have to agree. Much like the character customization, a significant amount of attention was paid to the fact that this game has nudity, and yet nothing is done with it. Even in the areas where you’d expect nudity to play a part (I.e. having sex, showering, etc.) it doesn’t, so it begs the question why even implement it?

- Vehicle customization.

This is going to maybe sound odd given my next answer but I kind of agree with this one to an extent. You can buy a fair amount of vehicles in the game, but you can’t customize any of them. At the very least, changing it’s colour and/or design I think is warranted.

- Apartment customization.

This I disagree with, again, to an extent. This isn’t Fallout 4 or the Sims, I don’t think there needs to be a fleshed-out feature to decorate your apartment. I do however think that some changes to it would be nice, even if they’re just preset changes. Like maybe the layout of misc. objects in your apartment changes as time goes on. Shit moves around, I don’t know. Or maybe you can pay for preset additions, like buying a lamp or poster or something that always goes in the same spot, but lets you feel like you live there I guess. Ultimately though, this is completely extra and unnecessary. Disagree.

- Cosmetic slots or transmog feature.

Hard agree. Again, customization of your character was made out to be a big deal, so let us wear the clothes we want to wear. The number of times I’ve had to run out in a skirt that says “Bitch” on it and a bra as a man simply because they’re my best clothes is unreal.

- Very few actual merchant stores in quantity and variety.

Quantity, I somewhat agree. The map could do with a few more of each type of merchant, although the map does sometimes already feel cluttered so perhaps not. Variety however, I disagree. I think there’s plenty variety in terms of merchants, I’m not sure what else you’d need. There’s merchants for guns, clothes, hacks, cyberware, resources, and consumables. What else is there.

- No garages or parking lots.

I assume this is related to owning multiple vehicles which I don’t yet so I’m not sure I understand where this argument is coming from. There is a parking garage at your apartment, so I don’t see why that couldn’t be a garage you can use, but ultimately I can’t weigh in on this without more information.

- Crowds have low level of reactivity and awareness to the game world.

This one bugs me because it’s like how much reactivity do non-interactable NPCs need? They run away from cars and violence. They say “oh shit” lines when you’re driving into them or shooting near them or they see a body, etc. What more do you need? Gonna have to disagree.

- Very few interactive NPCs outside of missions with meaningful dialogue.

See above and literally every open world game ever.

- Very few options to meaningfully construct a personality to V. You get to choose mission endings, but not an actual persona.

I disagree, I think you can pretty comfortably pick a persona for V. I mean it’s not the most advanced system in the world, no, but every game is going to limit your options. You can choose to be an asshole, a scumbag, a nice guy, honest, a liar, competent, incompetent, etc. It all depends on your attributes and what dialogue options you pick really.

- Lack of non-action oriented stories and quests about meaningful themes of cyberpunk dystopia.

This one I sort of agree with, but then again I’m a huge philosophy nerd so I generally can’t get enough philosophy in my games. I want every game to be as deep as Bioshock. I still have a long way to go in CP2077, so perhaps the quests get better, but many of them I’ve not found super interesting. Some have been memorable, sure, but very few, and of those not many are memorable for fitting the Cyberpunk theme explicitly.

- Player cannot smoke.

This one is just funny to me because, yeah in an RPG it’s not ideal to railroad the player, but because of the way the story goes, V doesn’t smoke. All so they can have a few funny lines of dialogue in the story, but w/e I’m okay without smoking.

- Weapon mods and skill trees largely irrelevant outside of marginal and mostly numerical improvements to combat.

I kind of agree with this. To be honest, I don’t even look at any of the stats outside of DPS and I get along just fine. I am playing on normal, so perhaps at a higher difficult these things matter more, but I can’t imagine how much more. So sure, I agree.

- Lack of emergent gameplay events in the game world (ie: dynamic and random triggers).

This falls under “how much is enough”, similar to the bit about the NPC interactions. From what I’ve seen so far, the only in-world ‘events’ that transpire are shootouts between cops and gangs that aren’t marked on your map as predetermined events. Could there be more? Sure, I guess. Does there need to be more? Eh, not really.

- Unable to alter character’s appearance (barbershop, tattoo parlors, plastic surgeon).

Agree. One mission I did, one of the rewards I received was a tattoo which made me think I was going to frequently unlock new customization aspects like that, but it ended up being a piece of cyberware for some odd reason. I think it would be neat if you didn’t have every bit of customization unlocked from the start and could change your appearance as you go unlocking more things.

- Lack of character reflection outside of the few mirrors available. This furthers the disconnection between the player and the character.

This was something I was thinking about genuinely, when standing in front of a mirror. A mirror has to be ‘activated’ in order to start showing your reflection, which I thought was odd, but I assumed it was because of performance issues which makes sense. At one point, even though my PC can’t run the game at ultra graphics, I switched over to it to see if mirrors would reflect all the time but they do not. I don’t however think we need to see our character all the time but more would certainly be better.

- No ownership of items (you can rob NPCs under their nose).

Yeeeeah, this bit I find kinda odd to be honest, especially because the UI for looting items is red which is commonly the colour used to denote “this item is owned and picking it up constitutes as theft”. Part of me thinks that the reason items don’t have ownership though is because of how clunky the stealth system is. There’s no way of knowing if an NPC can ‘see’ you or not. I feel like this is also why when you break a glass bottle or something, it doesn’t alert enemies because that would be so broken in this game because things explode all the time for no reason at all, you’d never be able to steal period. So I feel like no item ownership is because the developers know their game wouldn’t be fun with it.

- No prison or lasting crime system.

The lack of a prison is sort of explained (very briefly) in-game. The prisons are just way too overcrowded, and the police are basically a paramilitary organization who shoot on sight anyways, so there’s really no need for prisons. That said, committing a crime doesn’t have lasting consequences but again I think this is because the game knows that it’s too clunky to punish players for that. Driving is so wonky in this game, imagine if running over an NPC punished you beyond the small threat of police intervention? It would be unbearable.

- Wanted system is largely underdeveloped, with cops spawning out of nowhere and disappearing shortly after.

Yeah it is a little scuffed how cops just appear, that I will agree with.

- Cybernetics lack variety in meaningful choices that alter gameplay (except for limb weapons). Deus Ex has far more impactful mods that actually change the way you approach combat.

While I do sort of agree with there being a lack of variety, I feel the comparison to Deus Ex is a bit unfair. Deus Ex used cybernetics as it’s skill tree/progression system. When you leveled up in Deus Ex, you installed new cybernetics. That’s not the case in CP2077 though. I do however believe that outside of the legs, arms, and hands, not much really changes. I’m not sure what else they could do, but more would certainly be nice.

- The lifepaths are frustratingly brief and have little impact other than dialogue choices. V is essentially the same character regardless of path.

I can’t speak much to this because I haven’t even finished my first playthrough yet, but I will admit that there doesn’t seem to be a whole lot that comes from your lifepath. I’m playing as a Street Kid, and as someone who supposedly grew up on the streets, running with gangs, getting to know everyone, etc., it seems like there should be a bit more maybe. Like maybe Street Kids start with more gang rep because everyone knows who you are because you grew up together. The game tries to explain this away with “you went away for two years and have just recently come back” but right off the bat you meet one of the fixers who you knew and worked for before you left as if you were old friends, and two measly years is not enough for everyone to just forget who you are.

The traffic AI is lackluster and there are too few cars driving around for a large metropolis.

Disagree. There are plenty of cars for a reasonable driving experience. I don’t know if this guy was expecting bumper-to-bumper LA traffic or what, but there are plenty of cars to make the world feel alive and full while not being obnoxious and make driving impossible.

- Trains were obviously cut, even though the whole infrastructure is visible.

I genuinely don’t even know what this is referring to so I won’t comment on it.

- The world interaction is quite minimal. Among items that should be interactive: chairs, benches, toilets, stools, sinks, gym equipment, light fixtures, restaurant menus, smartphones, taxi, trash bins and dumpsters, most merchant stalls, microwaves, dancing floors, gaming tables, arcards.

This is a lot but some of it I agree with. You should be able to sit down on a lot more chairs, but at the same time I kinda understand why you can’t. The world is littered with places to sit, so much so that “Press F to Sit” would be on your screen 99% of the time. Taxis I was actually extremely disappointed were not in the game. The game literally sets up from the beginning that being a passenger in a car is a thing which gives you the impression that it’s a thing that can happen often, and that you’re able to either sit through the car ride or skip it altogether. I thought for sure that fast travel was going to constitute you hailing  cab and it taking you to wherever you’ve marked on your map, with the option to sit through the ride or skip it at-will. It’s actually a huge disappointment that that’s not the case (I even had my friend who is playing as a Corpo test whether Delamaine was specific to Corpos-only but alas, it didn’t work).

- You cannot preview wardrobe and weapon purchases.

I’ve not actually bought any guns or clothes so I can’t comment on this.

- There is no reliable cover system.

This one is odd because there is a cover system, but it’s only a weird hint of one. If you’re crouched by a low wall and you aim your weapon, you will peak around the wall, but it’s very finicky and poor. I think the game could do without one altogether, but the fact that there’s a hint at one already implies it’s intended, so it needs reworking.

- Loot system is overdone, invasive and distracting. You are constantly showered with redundant and marginally better items and have no attachment whatsoever with your fashion and weapon choices. (Dear god, I hate this one).

Hard agree. This seems like somewhat of a repeat to an earlier one about not being able to really customize your character out of necessity to wear whatever is best. Loot is prevalent, but hardly ever relevant.

- Enemies are too spongy and level design forces frontal assault way too often.

This one is interesting because I almost agreed with it until I played the game a bit more. In fact, I might’ve made a post about this before, I can’t recall, where I said that it didn’t feel like stealth was always an option. In many cases, I stand by that statement. The stealth gameplay specifically isn’t always an option, which is frustrating. If you’re like me, and you’re using stealth with quickhacking, then it becomes way more relevant. Being able to breach into a camera network and kill everyone with quickhacks is amazing. However, the game seems to somewhat punish this style of gameplay for some odd reason. I will go through and systematically kill everyone via cameras from outside the building, but the moment I step into the building, more enemies will show up out of nowhere. It’s not just that they’re hiding in areas outside of the cameras view, no they literally spawn into existence the moment you go inside. It’s really jarring, odd, and kind of unfortunate. Oh and as for sponginess...eh, yes and no sometimes. Weirdly my quickhacks sometimes one-shot enemies, and other times it takes like 8 quickhacks to kill one enemy. It’s seemingly random, or a bug, or something. I’m not sure.

- Robotics and drone control largely absent (outside of scripted missions).

Hard agree. I was genuinely shocked to find out I couldn’t control turrets when they started popping up more frequently. Drones I can let pass because they’re mobile and therefor a bit more complex to code properly I guess, but turrets are child’s play to code. They’re literally the same as cameras but with guns. It’s really odd that you aren’t even given a perk that’ll let you control them.

[aleximedicusa]

𝟷𝟾𝟸𝙾𝚜 𝙲𝙷𝙴𝙰𝚃 𝚂𝙷𝙴𝙴𝚃. i figured it might actually help people to have a simple cheat sheet guide to vague 1820s daily life, so they don’t have to go searching themselves to make an au if they want to! this is info compiled by both viktor and myself for the purpose of our 1820s server. under the cut bc this shit is long.

SO WHAT IS GENERAL LIFE LIKE ( as explained by mr. viktor b. [redacted] ) - We are early in industrialisation. Coal is primarily a source of heat, not power yet but it's Comin'. First steam locomotives have been made, and the first railway for public passengers just opened in '25, transporting people a short stretch in Durham (but who lives in Durham anyway). The main use of these engines is in mining. - The other industries that have been mechanised are done from wind and water mills. Most notably does textile production utilize water power. This will all eventually also switch to steam, we are in a real changeover period right now, just on the cusp of industrialisation - Gas lamps are widespread and in use in more fancy homes and public places! Otherwise, one must rely on petroleum or good ol candles, this makes us all very dependent on the phases of the moon for nighttime endeavours, as these lights are not particularly effective - Transportation is by Horse or Boat. Boat is faster, and as result, most industry and "larger" urban centres all congregate around rivers. - Society is generally quite fragmented, with the majority of populations living in the countryside with doings related to farmland and so on. The pricklings of industrialisation will drive more people towards the cities, as they build bigger receptacles for jobs and the countryside is mechanised. But not entirely yet. - We have just (well since 1815) exited the Napoleonic wars, a long and gruelling affair that has left Britain in a bit of an economic depression. There is general class unrest and intensified punishment for crime, which is on the rise. - it is an incredibly hierarchal society with very few avenues of social mobility, though with increasing industrialisation and better access to universities, the bourgeois class is rising and the economic elite are no longer all related by blood. What horror! - That is not to say that nobility have no power. Aside from the French, who are currently in a mess coming out of the First Empire (press F to pay respects), the noble class still controls the vast majority of funds and property, with most common people working underneath such a family in some regard. - disease is rife and often comes from lack of nutrients, but we don't know how those work so like, die I guess. As a result, malformations is far more common than today, especially in the underclass - Everyone Drinks Alcohol All The Time Water Is Not Safe - Empires are a thing! Imperialism is well on its way to do more acts of terror and horror upon the world, but it's also making the colonisers well rich so it's fine innit (it's not) - Fashions are back to being a bit more cinched in than they were in the earlier regency (get it because we're all wearing corsets with a tight waist focus im very smart) and is generally restrictive both for men and women in the upper class. The lower classes can't afford big changes in clothes, but at least they are all wearing long trousers now and not breeches. - Breeches are still valid for evening wear, show off those calves boyes - oh cholera is happening lol - clothes generally have far more layers and are heavier than what we see today. They wear for far longer for this reason, but this is also because warming up a house is bloody well impossible, if you've ever been in a student housing unit you know what I mean when I say poor insulation. You needed those layers pretty much year round.

SO WHAT’S THE DEAL WITH MEDICAL STUFF ( as explained by ms. iris n. [redacted] )

— Academic study of anatomy is rapidly on the rise. We've shot up from around 300 students of anatomy in London in 1798 to nearly 1,000 in London in 1823. Approach to teaching anatomy is also changing, with a heavier emphasis on the necessity of students dissecting bodies themselves instead of merely observing dissection.  — In 1788, we have the first recorded trial for disinterment of a corpse. In Rex v. Lynn, the judge ruled it to be a misdemeanour to disinter a body for dissection. However, this law really wasn't that strongly enforced when it first came into play, since, at that time, there were few enough exhumators / resurrectionists that the public really didn't notice the offence. As demand increased, however, the public became more aware of the crime, and the authorities started to crack down more on the guilty parties. There are also cases that have set up the precedence that even preventing a body from initial interment is a punishable offence, as some men have been charged with crimes like conspiring to prevent burial. Surgeons and anatomists can be indicted, too, not just the resurrectionists. — As both demand and risk increase, the resurrectionists become more and more degraded and desperate individuals. There's an enormous amount of competition between them, with criminals competing to muscle others out of their territories.  — The price for a body is generally between £7 and £10, at this time. Burke and Hare sold their first body in 1827 for £7.10. This is an enormous price in the 1820s. — Students are starting to leave England in pursuit of better anatomy teaching, generally choosing France for its comparatively more lax laws regarding dissection. Professors, students, and doctors are starting to really put pressure on the government to reform the system.  — The only bodies you can legally dissect at this point are the bodies of hanged murderers. A debate was introduced in parliament to suggest widening the scope of the law to permit dissecting the bodies of those hanged for burglary and robbery, but this was never put into law. — Most anatomists did not know (or at least claimed not to know) that it was illegal to have a body in their possession that did not belong to a hanged murderer. As such, many were not very careful about hiding the fact that they were purchasing disinterred bodies. — The decision of what to do to reform the system is heavily debated. Some doctors favour the French system, wherein any unclaimed body is permitted to be used for dissection; some more radical doctors, like the anonymous doctor who published a pamphlet under the pseudonym of Alexipharmacus in 1829, favour a system wherein the only bodies dissected are the bodies of those who have given express consent for their corpses to be anatomised after death. Guy was ahead of his time, really. — Although the Burke and Hare case doesn't break until November of 1828, people were already beginning to discuss the worrying possibility that this current system was going to end up producing murderers.  — Public sentiment towards anatomists and surgeons wasn't... great, at this period, for obvious reasons.

[pluviophile-bookworm]

Thoughts/ reaction to AWAE 3x10

So, I mentioned in a post I made around midnight (standard Bulgarian time), three hours before this episode aired, that I wasn’t feeling quite like living and that this episode was one of very few things keeping me alive. Since then, I went through a lot more that showed me life really is worth living, and after a small celebration of my birthday (I’m two decades old, yay not so yay really), it’s finally time to open my last, and, hopefully, best present. 

I’ve been going out of my way to avoid spoilers, which is something I never usually do (bc spoilers can be a lifesaving trigger warning), so I’m diving into this episode 100% unprepared for whatever is to happen. I hope I was right not to spoil it for myself. 

I’m rambling oof  So without further ado, here goes my reaction to AWAE  3x10:

Oh my my, what a start. I never expected this. Even after everything Moira has hit me with, I never expected a cold open to include a crying Winifred. Sure, I didn’t expect her to take it lightly, but, well, it seems just a bit too much to me - coming from her, that is. Other girls, on the other hand... by all means, I am immensely grateful that Ruby got over her crush on Gilbert before this happened. Of course, I am so happy for her and Moody, but even if she hadn’t moved on to somebody else immediately, I’m glad her romantic feelings for Gilbert no longer exist because seeing him get together with Anne, one of her closest friends (they are getting together soon, I know it), would have broken her heart. Was that last sentence too long? I hope not. Ok, moving on. 

So, I understand that Winifred must feel cheated, led on, used and whatnot, and that shows that, for whatever reason, she must really have very strong feelings for Gilbert. I’m not saying she loves him the way Anne does - because no one ever could - but I’m saying that for her to be so affected, there have to be some true and strong feelings. On a semi-related note, though, is the idea of her and Prissy getting together off the table? Because it definitely is still very much there in my head. Just saying.

I cannot believe this, and yet it seems to be true - Gilbert broke off the engagement with Winnie before it happened (good) while still thinking Anne doesn’t love him back (bad, so bad). How do these things happen? He must be very, very sure in his own feelings for her then. I cannot wait for him to find out... but how can he find out? I need answers. I need closure. Now. 

Props to Gilbert for telling Winnie that she is exceptional (true) and deserves to be truly loved (very true). Our boy might not love her, but he cares for her very deeply and it must be awful to watch her cry because of him... I hope they can still be friends. And I really hope Winnie and Anne can be friends one day. 

Did he just promise not to tell anyone he’s not engaged to Winnie for two weeks? Do you realise what this means? If he keeps that promise, it might be too late for him and Anne. And he still doesn’t know that she loves him back, and how can he possibly find out without bringing up the fact that he didn’t propose to Winifred? My, that was some cold open. 

My sweet Ruby... wasn’t it only half a season ago that she was only going to Queens to be close to Gilbert? And now she doesn’t want to go without Moody. I’m happy for her, but she seems to have re-attached very strongly in a very short time. I sure hope she doesn’t get hurt. I mean, Moody wouldn’t hurt her, right?

Anne eyeing Gilbert and Gilbert looking back at her... the room is filled with tension, and yet that between the two of them is of a completely different kind. I want this to be resolved already. 

Diana saying she’ll faint if she turns out to have passed the exams is ironic/ funny on a purely linguistic level. She’s practically saying she’ll pass out if she’s passed the exams, get it? No? Just me?

She got in! People, Diana got into Queens! With zero special preparation. I have no choice but to stan. 

The little smiles Anne and Gilbert exchanged when they found out they tied for first place... it almost looked like they forgot all the tension and were just genuinely happy for each other in that moment... and then there’s the extremely awkward “Congratulations” scene which is just another misunderstanding. 

“Potato light bulbs forever!” Well said, Moody, very well said indeed.

Poor Anne is still so disappointed in Gilbert not giving her any response to her note. Poor unfortunate note never reached him, or else things would be vastly different right about now.

Oh my, oh my, they will be roommates, if you know what I mean. What would I give to see this... unfortunately, there was one spoiler I could not avoid, and it is the very real fact that AWAE has been cancelled. But I really want to  see so many more things. Please, people, we can make it happen! #renewAWAE #AWAES4

Poor Diana. I hope there is a force on Earth that can convince her parents to let her go to Queens.

“It is your future, not theirs.” / “It’s not your future, it’s ours!” Oh the tragic parallel, I can’t even. Poor Diana. 

Ok, Winnie I can take, but Eliza Barry is going on my nerves with her crying. True, Diana did go to the exam by lying about where she was going, and she did one more secret thing that would positively make her mother self-combust (I’m talking about Derry and where is my Derry resolution?), but this is a bit too over the top.

Look at the Cuthberts + honorary family member Jerry picking corn together like a true farming family... how idyllic. Also, Jerry is back! And the looks on his and Matthew’s face when Anne starts talking about corsets is just priceless. I love these two. They need their own spin-off. 

Oh my, Matthew, what are you talking about? Sure, giving Jerry his own room at Green Gables is super heartwarming and, sure, the much missed smile was back on Jerry’s face for a couple seconds, but this is just such a callback to Anne’s original problem with Jerry when both of them first arrived at Green Gables - she feels like Matthew and Marilla are replacing her with him, like they’re getting the boy they originally wanted and she’s out of the family. What a heartbreaking turn of events. 

They’re showing us family after family, and in two out of three so far things have gone bad. I hope this is not the case with the Lacroixes. Hazel just told her son she’s proud of him. It seems like their misunderstandings of the past are water under the bridge and that makes me happy. Just please don’t let this take a turn for the worse.

Hazel being soft with her baby granddaughter is so heartwarming... but I’ve been hurt before and I just hope this scene isn’t giving me a false sense of security. 

Gilbert is alone at Green Gables. What could happen? What did he come for? Oh, I can’t, it’s the pen, you guys! Oh my, he’s writing a note to Anne... oh, the parallels...

“My Anne with an E”... I cannot, I simply cannot with this. I can’t, he’s talking about being engaged to her, calling her his Anne... and he still doesn’t know she loves him back. Boy has finally decided to act on his feelings. Took him some time, that’s for sure. That slate to the head must have totally dimmed his senses in order for him to miss the signs. I wonder what Anne’s excuse is.

I can’t help feeling that Anne has somehow reverted back to her 1x1 self. Getting Matthew a cup of water he didn’t ask for and asking if he needs help with the milkers, and just nervously trying to do any chore just to prove she’s useful... poor Anne. So many years of love and acceptance and found family happiness have been pretty much erased by Matthew’s comment about more or less replacing Anne with Jerry. Why, Matthew? I trusted you.

Their cows’ names are Pride and Prejudice? Doesn’t take much to figure out who gave them those names. But now one of them has been sold to the Andrewses. I just hope they treat her well. My, am I getting worried about a cow I don’t even know now?

Oh Anne, how could you say this? There is no way for any place you’ve been at to go back to the way it was before you. Seriously, Anne has this way of changing the world around her for the better that just can’t not leave a trace in a decent person’s heart. And Matthew Cuthbert sure is one. I know he didn’t mean what he said the way that Anne perceived it. I’m sure there is some explanation.

Oh my, Anne found the note. So far this one is doing better than the first one. And... I spoke too soon. Goodness, Anne, why? You couldn’t just read it, you had to tear it up beyond repair and throw it out the window. Shirbert should be banned for life from writing notes. 

Sure, Anne. Act before you think, think a second after you act. Dammit, smart people can be so stupid!

Anne stinks at puzzles. The way she arranged the words made the note look a totally different size than the original. And she saw it clearly before she ripped the life out of it. 

I just cannot with these two. Gilbert takes Anne’s drunken ramblings about pirates to mean she doesn’t love him. Then Anne rearranges Gilbert’s note, which she destroyed herself, to say he doesn’t love her. Thanks, I hate it.

Poor Diana, indeed. Can’t this episode stop making me suffer? This was supposed to be a nice birthday present. And this is supposed to be the last episode ever? No, guys, we can’t let that happen. I did not sign up for this suffering. 

Just seeing the way Marilla acts around Anne makes it perfectly clear that things have changed dramatically in the last three years, and yet somehow it feels like Anne still doesn’t feel like her place in the Cuthbert family is secure. But I understand her. I fell into a great crisis before going off to college, too. I just hope she gets to feel better soon. Girl has been through so much already. 

What could have made Bash jump up so suddenly and run like this? Oh, I cannot believe it. It’s Elijah. He’s back with John Blythe’s things and it seems he’s repenting. But Bash isn’t having it. Oh my, I knew things would get worse for the Blythe- Lacroixes, too, I was just hoping I’d be wrong. Why is this episode doing this to me?

Right on, Marilla. Talk some sense into Eliza Barry. She’s been needing this for a long, long time. 

“Soar to the highest heights” and “plunge to the deepest depths” - that’s Anne alright. She’s literally had both happen within the same day. Multiple times. She’s a “passionate individual”, after all, if I may use Gilbert’s words. 

This scene with Anne and Miss Stacy is such a beautiful contrast to the way they met. Anne sure wasn’t quite herself that day and I’m glad to see she and Miss Stacy are not just a passionate progressive teacher and a curious, headstrong student - they’re great friends now. 

So that letter Marilla received had to do with Anne’s lineage? I want to know any information about it just as much as Anne does. 

I don’t like it that it’s Matthew who has to be called out on his actions, but I’m glad Marilla is calling him out. Whatever his intentions were, and I’m sure they were nothing but good, what he said took Anne back to square one, only with so much more to lose now. 

This episode has too much crying in it. But now it’s coming from Matthew and it’s breaking my heart. 

Idyllic Blythe-Lacroix family scene in the orchard? Apparently this is not that scene. I see Eljah is still there. And from the way he acted at his mother’s grave, I could tell he truly repents for what he’s done. He just wants to be part of the family. And I want to know how that goes. 

It looks like they accept him in. For now, at least. I hope things can smooth over between them. 

Anne has her hair up... and she’s... is she wearing a corset? Little girl sure has grown up. 

I though Matthew would have that talk with Anne, but it seems like he, too has reverted back to his day 1 personality. What is this? Why are they both throwing their character- and inter-character development out the window like this?

Oh my, look at all the girls, all grown up. What girls, they’re practically women now. All so elegant in their lady dresses and their corsets and their hats. Such a glow-up. Not that they needed a glow-up, but it looks good on them all.

Deaf/ mute representation. I love it. Now more than ever we need a season 4 to expand on the girls’ relationship with Lily. And with curfew, which is “not a suggestion”. But especially Lily. 

The way the girls act in their dorm room just goes to show that even with the lady dresses and the corsets and everything, they’re still teenage girls that just want to have fun. I love these girls. 

I know Jerry doesn’t do all that much in this episode (where is my Derry conclusion?), but I’m just so glad to see that he and his beautiful smile are back. And right now he’s bringing the most important letter of all. And don’t worry, it’s not written by Shirbert, so it’s not getting lost or torn to pieces. 

I cannot with all these Shirbert parallels... at about the same time as Anne, Gilbert gets a life-changing letter, too. He’s going to the University of Toronto. I knew it. 

I just can’t... (gosh, this episode has stripped me of all the ability to can) Delly might have just lost her Uncle Gilby to UofT, but she’s just got her big brother Elijah back.

Josephine Barry... I like where this is going. If we get to also see Cole this time...

Now this is what dreams are made of. He’s there. He’s there and he’s looking as elegant as ever. I missed my boy. I’m still waiting for an interaction between him and my other boy Jerry... and we all know that ain’t happening unless we get them to renew AWAE... we can make it happen. 

I can’t. Once again I’m unable to can, this time because of how amazing Anne looks in this dress. I’ve been waiting so long to see it, and it’s more gorgeous than I could have imagined. Anne is, too. Matthew’s face says it all. Green dress who? No, I mean, it’s still absolutely stunning, but this one is way more Anne in my opinion. 

Why the suspense, Anne? Read it out loud, for goodness’ sake? The lack of background music and the ticking of the clock just make it so much more suspenseful.

See? This is why I missed Cole so much - well, not just this, but this too. His beautiful friendship with Anne, that is. Can you believe he hasn’t seen her in so long and yet he still knows her better than anybody else in that room, and, as Anne said herself, they’re all her family. I need more of their friendship. 

There we have it, guys, gals and nb pals, Matthew’s opening up. It was about time. I’m so proud of my man.

“My Anne”, along with the several times Anne was referred to as their daughter, or Marilla and Matthew as her mother and father... beautiful. I’m literally tearing up. 

So Mrs. Thomas does have information about the Shirleys after all. And while Anne is off exploring the town, her parents are looking for... her birth parents. And they’ve sort of found them in this book, The Language of Flowers. Turns out Bertha was a teacher. Like mother, like daughter. Even if she didn’t have the chance to raise her. 

I’m getting chills. Anne and Winifred... oh my, this is bad. This is a bigger misunderstanding than there has ever been between Shirbert, if that’s even possible at this point. Seriously, for two exceptionally smart girls, these two are dumb. 

Oh dear, Diana in her lady dress and hat looks so much like her mother, it’s scary. Well, that’s if her mother was an educated, brave woman ready to take risks for what she believes in. But in terms of looks... it’s almost creepy. 

Even dressed as a beautiful young lady, Anne is just as clumsy as ever. I love her just like that.

The look on Diana’s face scares me. Poor Gilbert here, a victim of the circumstances, doesn’t know what hit him... and it’s not a slate this time. This is not a school crush anymore. We’re talking courting and marriage here. And Diana, best of friends in the world, has had it with this series of unfortunate misunderstandings between Shirbert. 

Did he just jump off of a moving train or something? That’s right - run, Gil, run like the wind! We’re getting closure on this whole thing after all. I hope. 

Oh my, they’re going to- the time for words has run out. They were never any good when it came to these two. They’re going to kiss!

Wow, that was some kiss! It was like Gil here has been holding this in ever since that slate broke over his head. And I’m pretty sure that’s how it really was. Intense, wasn’t it? And then Anne pinching herself to make sure she’s not imagining this - are you telling me she’s been having fantasies of kissing Gilbert?

Wait, he’s still asking if she loves him back after they actually kissed? I don’t mean to sound like a broken record, but - smart people are really dumb. 

A second kiss? Initiated by Anne? Now that’s the stuff of fanfiction. I may have to pinch myself too to make sure I really saw what I saw. 

“Pen pals?” Pen pals, huh? I mean, as long as they don’t intend to share one single pen and as long as they don’t hand-deliver the letters in the absence of each other... this could actually work.

Diana! And was that Mr. Barry coming to his senses after all?

Spare your steps, Gil! The guy really got on the carriage then right back off just to kiss Anne a third and fourth time - not counting the knuckle kiss, which, by the way, totally counts. 

The Cuthberts (yes, including a certain Shirley-Cuthbert) are going to make me cry... 

Funny that “I look like my mother” is the first thing she wanted to tell Gilbert in her first letter... but, I mean, that’s something incredibly important to her and they’ll be talking about all kinds of stuff, so why not? It’s actually beautiful. 

Sure, I want a fourth season with all my heart and soul, but even if we never get one (which we will), this was the most beautiful finale I could have imagined. 

I mean, there are certainly three things I wanted to see resolved by this finale: (1) Derry’s storyline - they sort of acted like it never happened and I’m not ok with that; (2) Ka’kwet’s family’s storyline - not even mentioned, like they were never there. This is the same kind of erasure that the White Man’s Burden prison school was doing. Not a fan. I demand closure on Ka’kwet’s story. (3) Closure on the Andrews family and Josie - this storyline can't have been introduced just for the sake of talking about abuse, consent and freedom of speech.

To sum up, in this rollercoaster of a season finale we saw: lots of crying - unexpected but justified from Winifred, way over the top by Eliza Barry, devastating by Diana, and heartbreaking by Matthew - bonus: a breakdown by Anne after a disappointing letter, then a tear of joy upon learning about her family; lots of the usual Shirbert stuff - tension, longing looks and misunderstandings; the misadventures of another love note; an overwhelming amount of parallels with varying degrees of subtlety; Diana gets into Queens, Gilbert gets into U of T; Elijah is accepted into the Blythe-Lacroix (mostly just Lacroix now) family; Anne and Matthew erase three years’ worth of character development - then get back on track, luckily; Diana is an absolute queen; a pair of cows named Pride and Prejudice - not actually shown on screen; all the girls looking classy in lady dresses and corsets; Marilla helps get Diana to Queens; Jerry + his smile and Cole are back for the finale; Shirbert share not one or two, but five kisses (counting the knuckle one); pen pals Shirbert.

[resonanteye]

via http://resonanteye.net/current-events-condensed/

current events; condensed

A condensed post including short writings on current events.

CONSPIRACIES ARE NOT SECRET IN THIS CENTURY

open up? conspiracies? here’s the real one.

  if They want to “cull the weak” and control us better, what better way than to present a false choice between going back to work and risking lives, or slowly going broke at home?

it’s a false choice. there are hoarders, greedy fucks holding money they’re not entitled to, billions. enough for everything to be covered. hell, the Pentagon LOST enough money to pay EVERYONE’S rent and mortgage for the best six months. LOST IT.

The conspiracy? PRETEND THAT MONEY ISN’T THERE. force people to fight over scraps, pretend there are only two options. don’t let people come together and agree that TOO MUCH MONEY IS IN TOO FEW HANDS, because that might mean we can beat this thing.

unity among the poor? PREVENT AT ALL COSTS. if you kill a few hundred thousand people in the process, fuck it. that doesn’t matter to Them. They want to keep their grip on power, forcing us to behave like serfs working at their pleasure, dying for their capital gains. Living in their damn bunkers.

There is more than these two choices, don’t let them suck you in. the current garbage video circulating is MORE OF THEIR SHIT. it’s part of this. it’s not “secret info” or “exposing an evil plan”.

to get what They want – they’ve just got to keep us arguing about whether to open up or not. that’s it. that’s all they’ve got to do. circulate some fake anti science garbage to make sure it goes over easy.

and murder a ton of people to make another dollar.

THAT’S your conspiracy. THERE’S your elite takeover.

they don’t need micro chips, 5g, or any of this other shit. vaccines aren’t “Them”, the anti vax movement is THEM trying to murder the “useless”.

” WAKE UP, SHEEPLE ” it’s obvious as fuck and you don’t need to go out on any limbs to see it. it’s plain as day. they’re saying it out loud. there’s no need for this conspiracy to be secret. half of you are HAPPY TO JOIN IN.

stop that. join together. fight for the end of greedy leeches stealing from us then pretending that money is gone and they can’t help. the big banks? THEY FUCKING OWE US ONE. it’s time we collect, TOGETHER. right/left/middle. all of us. they owe all of us.

Divine is disgusted by slumming yuppies

SEGREGATION, A REAL THING

in a post about this photo, someone from Europe, younger, asked if segregation was a real thing, a real law in the US. comments were then closed, so I’ll post my reply here instead, in case anyone was not aware.

Elvis sits to eat at a segregated lunch counter while an elderly black woman stands, waiting for food to take away. she’s not allowed to sit there.

it was law, and when it wasn’t the law it was the unspoken rule, for a very long time.

lunch counter (restaurants of all kinds), bus sections, bathrooms, water faucets and schools were separated by race. the fight to desegregate schools is most well known, as it lasted a very long time and required buses, because people of color had also been segregated by neighborhood- many towns refused to sell and owners refused to rent to anyone of color in a “white area”. (the TV show “the Jeffersons” addresses this, and it’s also known as “redlining”)

many politicians on both sides of the aisle supported it, but the Democratic party eventually worked to pass the civil rights amendment and related bills to stop it, although there were those in the party who still argued in favor of these laws.

https://www.businessinsider.com/biden-said-desegregation-would-create-a-racial-jungle-2019-7

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lester_Maddox

(of note- this happened after desegregation, that’s how strongly politicians felt about it! ten years in and they were still arguing that it had been a good thing.)

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Massive_resistance

after it legally ended, thanks to the civil rights movement, there was blowback; people trying to vote, to eat lunch, ride the bus, go to school, were viciously attacked by crowds or groups of white people.

FILE – In this May 28, 1963 file photo, a group of whites pour sugar, ketchup and mustard over the heads of Tougaloo College student demonstrators at a sit-in demonstration at a Woolworth’s lunch counter in Jackson, Miss. Seated at the counter, from left, are Tougaloo College professor John Salter,and students Joan Trumpauer and Anne Moody. John Salter, who also used the name John Hunter Gray, died Monday, Jan. 7, 2019 at his home in Pocatello, Idaho. Relatives say he was 84 when he died Monday after an illness. (Fred Blackwell/The Clarion-Ledger via AP, File) ORG XMIT: MSJAD701

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Freedom_Riders https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jim_Crow_laws

during this time, due to so much police and community violence, the Black Panther formed to monitor and protect people.

https://www.wglt.org/post/director-chronicles-black-panthers-rise-new-tactics-were-needed#stream/0

members of the Black Panthers, preparing to feed the community

GENERATION X

sure, we are slackers. yeah. we’re ok with staying home. you have just told a generation of latchkey tech addicts raised during the bridge from antenna TVs to HD internet streaming to sit at home. if you’d feed us, we wouldn’t even blink at it. this quarantine stuff? that’s not the hard thing.

but we’re watching friends and family die. a lot of us have been down this road before. we’ve watched right wing pigs (yes, I’ll say it) allow our friends to die before. we’ve been down this road of denial and greed and prejudice and all of it. we’ve seen what happens when politicians value money and ego over human lives, and we know it SUCKS ASS.

hell, we watched Reagan. Bush. Bush. Clinton, too-he was only a hair better. and so-

when we need to, we pound the pavement. we toss the bricks. we get arrested. we wipe mace out of our eyes and stampede.

we always tend to be masked, regardless of standards of the moment. I don’t think, in my life, I’ve been to a protest that didn’t have a contingent of masked people wishing to avoid cameras. Now, a protest for actual assistance for people? a real protest, a fight for better conditions, the 300-some strikes that have happened that the news ISN’T covering? yeah. surgical masks. they’re brilliant photos, but not as interesting for the crap media as a few fat guys with guns.

because that’s the joke they want to show us, yeah? not people actually fighting in solidarity, to protect each other, get better work conditions, protect the disabled, get better healthcare for all, support people financially… the shit the majority of people really want. no. they’re not covering that real shit.

the news, they like a spectacle.

we need to find ways to make the facts spectacular.

I have rarely seen my generation protest FOR corporate interests and find any such thing suspicious as all fuck. I don’t believe a bit of that shit. That’s paid for, that’s arranged, that’s a pony show. That’s the same tiny batch of zonked out cultists that don’t have a trump rally to travel to right now. it’s like a damn road show, the same hundred people, like some Boomer deadhead traveling bus shit. I don’t trust it and I don’t believe it. the older folks at them, yeah. they’re that little band of travelers. sure. but us?

Seattle police use gas to push back World Trade Organization protesters in downtown Seattle Tuesday, Nov. 30, 1999. The protests delayed the opening of the WTO third ministerial conference. (AP Photo/Eric Draper)

because even though we will go do Things, we are, in fact, ok with staying home.

and we don’t like your fucking company. and corporations bought our music and art and killed it in front of our eyes, and there’s no getting our trust back. and we will wear a goddamn busted ass thrift store sack before we spend money on slave-sewn clothes. and we would rather read and write and play music and watch movies all damn day, than go to jobs in cubicles.

War protesters and march to Gas Works Park protesting the US involvement in the Persian Gulf and the buid up to war against Irag January 15 deadline 1991 Seattle Washington State USA

I mean, we’ll usually go, because we gotta eat. so feed us. give us bread. you already poisoned the roses.

  THE ASSHOLE FACTORY

this is where your conspiracy videos are made. in the asshole factory.

what do you notice about these photos? do you see the threats? what kind of people are there?

it is almost like there’s a monthly event they’ve been going to, that’s been cancelled, where they could hold up trump signs and boo anything reasonable… wonder what that event is. where have you seen some of these faces before? I’ve seen a few in the rally photos and videos.

check out “small business” guy. who is he? does he own a “small business”, you think? (photos by Orin Louis)

  ON THE PANDEMIC

a lot of people talking about immunity/reinfection and that study.

that study is just saying we don’t know yet. we just don’t know yet.

it’s early days.

Coronavirus is not influenza, they’re two different families of virus. VERY different.

this is more related to the common cold (in its behavior)than to the flu. (the cold is a rhinovirus. SARS & MERS, and Covid-19, if you want to find out more about these viruses, don’t look up the flu-they are Coronaviruses.)

it is contagious the way a cold is, but it has serious effects on any part of the body with ace2 receptors. (simply put- blood, lungs, heart, kidneys, brain)

they have been working on a cold vaccine for decades. no success. BUT. again, it’s early days. there’s never been this kind of pressure for a vaccine for it. so, to be direct: we don’t know yet. they’ve never been this desperate, this well funded, to find a cold vaccine.

this could be a seasonal thing, eventually- it could mutate to be less lethal and become just another cold we can get every year. it could mutate to be even more vicious and we all are in serious danger all the time. it could create immunity, and some will be ok for a year or a month or a decade… it might not, and people can catch it again and worse.

we just don’t know yet. the whole reason we are isolating the way we are is to buy time for science to find these answers. we’re not in quarantine to “kill it off” or stop it. we are slowing it down so science can have time to find answers, so less of us die while that happens.

  every day we don’t infect other people, is a day in which researchers can work. we need them to work. they are doing that. every day we don’t infect other people, is a day this virus doesn’t get a chance to mutate and change. this helps a lot.

science needs time. all this economic mayhem- it’s to buy them time to help us, to figure it out. the answers won’t come right away and during this time we may hear things that are being tried and tested, some may not work at all, some may be worse than nothing, so information won’t be steady or always correct. when you read a thing, wait a day. read more about it. read the actual study- and if you can’t, wait a few days and read what scientific sources say about it (the lancet, NEJM, etc). don’t rely on NBC, fox, etc to do a great job reporting on science. you’ll have to have patience, even science is having to watch and wait while things are researched, right now.

nobody has the answers; it’s NOVEL. brand new.

they’re testing, they’re researching, they’re learning this thing’s secrets as fast as they can, while we wait that process out.

be as safe as you can be while we buy them the time.

image: pink pangolin drawing in frame

  COMMON SENSE KNOWLEDGE

FOR ACCURACY

You shouldn’t leave the house unless you absolutely have to: food, medicine, or other necessity of life. This includes going to other people’s houses.

Masks are good at protecting others if you are infected, and help protect you too, just not as much as others. Wear one.

Stores are closed, unless they provide food or medicine. Alcohol is a necessity for alcoholics who will have actual seizures and could die from withdrawal, so some of those are open. (Some states have been pressured into letting other things stay open, and people insist on going to church and being able to buy guns in public stores, but that’s political shit and you shouldn’t go places unless you have to.)

This virus is deadly to many people, even healthy ones, is as contagious as a common cold, and has killed more people in a month than the flu does in a year. You don’t want to catch it, and if you do, you want to catch it when doctors and nurses aren’t overworked from other people catching it too. There are 8 strains identified right now. This will change over time, because it’ll mutate- like every virus. EVERY virus.

Glovesw help, unless you change them after touching a contaminated surface. They’re good if used properly and if you’re not sure how to do that, don’t bother. Just wash your hands often.

Everyonen to stay home, but you can go outside- away from people. Staying a good distance from people is really the whole point of staying home.

There will be shortages of some things at the grocery store as supplies run out, and as things are shipped to replace them. Chill out.

The virus does spread through and sometimes kill children, but we weren’t aware of this until we had better information.

You will have many symptoms when you are sick, but you will be contagious for up to two weeks before you get sick. YOU WILL BE CONTAGIOUS WITH NO TEMPERATURE OR SYMPTOMS.

You really shouldn’t be eating restaurant food, unless you can reheat it. Wipe down or wash off your groceries.

You are safe if you maintain six feet distance from others, if everyone is masked and nobody is coughing or sneezing. If they are, you need about 27 feet of distance. Keep space from people.

The virus remains active on different surfaces for a time. The surface being porous may or may not matter; like many things, research by science will give better answers as they have time to figure it out.

We count the number of deaths but we don’t know how many people are infected because most places have not got enough tests to see who is infected. Until we can test everyone, stay home, stay away from people.

We have no treatment. There are clinical trials of many different drugs and at least one vaccine, right now, but it will take time to find out what works.

We should stay away from people to avoid spreading this virus until scientists can offer a treatment or preventative measure like a vaccine. There is no reason to infect people, help the virus mutate, or fuck around with this.

If you are an essential worker of ANY kind, you deserve a living wage, hazard pay, full PPE and kindness from everyone who needs you right now. we should be fighting for your safety, not to make things more dangerous for you.

Stop spreading misinformation. Science doesn’t know everything about this yet, information can and will change or become more specific as time goes by. Yes, business interests and governments have handled the entire thing like a clown show, but you don’t have to be part of making it worse.

  THE VALIDITY OF PROTESTING IN THIS TIME

protest for:

stronger unions

better pay

stronger social safety nets during a pandemic

your right to own and bear arms

your freedom of speech/freedom from unwarranted surveillance

safer working conditions

medical care for all

free education

fair elections

physical safety from police violence

safety from racist/hate crimes

NOT FOR:

fuck, BUYING things. don’t protest to be able to go buy shit? what the hell is wrong with you?!? you can buy a gun next month, dipshit. you can buy through private sale. fuck all the way off with that.

SOMEONE ELSE TO WAIT ON YOU (haircuts, restaurants, nails, tattoos, etc)

the right to block hospital entrances (we all saw the footage, shut the fuck up)

the right to gigantic church services during a pandemic. YOU CAN DO LIKE GRANDPA DID AND WATCH YOUR PREACHER ON THE TEE VEE.

going to a shit job that you’ve never liked instead of all the things above that would have allowed you to get through this shit without starving to begin with

by the way, local seed and feed stores are open nation wide; agriculture is considered an essential business. you can’t buy whatever the fuck at wallymart right now though, SO SORRY. maybe don’t even fucking shop there?

edit to add; if they were only endangering themselves I wouldn’t give a shit – but you know these fuckers are getting too close to store cashiers, walking the wrong way down narrow aisles, and touching every-fuckin-thing.

  also: 81% of people polled, from EVERY political group, think they should be staying home. and agree with that. THIS IS A CRAP PROTEST BY A TINY, UNIMPORTANT GROUP and should not be getting the coverage it is. they aren’t enough to restore an economy, let alone fill a small concert hall.

    I may split these into separate posts, if you’d like that, comment so I know people need/want that.

[bitchesgetriches]

Hello! I have a question if you don’t mind answering 😊 (please bear in mind, I’m autistic and don’t really understand the social nuances in talking about money so if I come off spoiled or stuck-up I’m so sorry) So! Backstory: my family is pretty well off, and doesn’t really have to worry about money, and both my parents are very religious and like using their money to help others in need, anonymously when possible. So I’ve never really understood the negative connotations with receiving a (1/?)

           (cont’d.) receiving a gift that was something you needed but couldn’t afford. My parents have always done things like choosing a family in need to buy gifts for Christmas kind of thing, and I like doing the same when possible. Cut to now, and my current boyfriend has finally saved up enough money to move out of his abusive ex’s house. However, since he was trying to do it as quickly as possible, there are a lot of things he doesn’t have yet that are essential, like a mattress. His plan is (2/?)   

           (cont’d.) is to buy a blow-up mattress for now, until he can save enough for a real mattress. However, I think it’d be much better to just get a real mattress now, especially considering he has back problems. I know he can’t afford it, but I can. I really want to buy one for him as a gift, no strings attached (not uber-expensive, just in the $200-300 range for now), but I’m afraid he’ll get upset about me paying for such a big purchase. So my question is: what’s the reason behind negative (3/4)       

           (cont’d.) negative reactions to big/expensive gifts when you can’t afford them yourself, and do you guys have any input on whether you think I should buy it? Thanks so much! (4/4)            

Wow, what an interesting question! First of all, dearest, it sounds like you were raised by very generous, caring parents to be a generous, caring person. And that’s nothing to be ashamed of. You should be proud that your family strongly values charitable giving and looking after the less fortunate members of your community. I don’t know what religion you are, but pretty much ALL of them say “take care of poor people and don’t be an asshole.” So you’re doing just fine.

I relate a bit to you in that I was raised in a financially solvent family. I also relate to your boyfriend in that after college, I was completely financially independent, saddled with student loans, and responsible for all of my own living costs. I lived with 5 other people in a shared house owned by one of my roommates... whose wealthy father had bought the house for her. She lived there rent-free and the rest of us paid her rent.

My rich friend was definitely doing the rest of us a favor. It was very kind of her to rent to her friends at below-market value. But inherent in that kindness was the understanding that we all owed her. That we couldn’t have afforded to live in the city without her generosity. And that kind of financial power imbalance can lead to resentment. And resentment is the WORST roommate.

When poorer people accept the generosity or charity of richer people, it stings. It can lead to shame and resentment because to accept such charity is to say “I’m not strong enough/wise enough/capable enough to support myself.” Even if NONE OF THAT IS TRUE, it’s hard to accept charity without feeling those things. We all want to be strong and self-sufficient and independent. To accept charity is to admit failure in that department... or at least that’s the internal perception of many people. We can tell ourselves accepting charity doesn’t have to be a bad thing, that there’s nothing wrong with the generosity of those who have enough to give. But it still can be a huge blow to one’s pride.

I take a lot of fucking pride in how good I am at running my financial life. I’m a strong, capable, bad-ass bitch and I take care of my people. At this very moment, I’m paying a friend who just lost her job to clean my house. I’m perfectly capable of cleaning my own fucking house, but she needs money! And I know that she feels much more comfortable accepting work from me than accepting a “handout.”

Yes, a real mattress will be better for your boyfriend’s back. And yes, you can afford to buy him this gift. But his pride might dictate that he work for the purchase himself, rather than relying on your generosity and, thus, admitting his own failure and weakness. That’s the root of this issue.

All that said, this is a very thoughtful idea. I recommend that you bring it up with him as a discussion. Suggest buying him the mattress because you care about his back pain and his quality of sleep. If you plan on sleeping over at his place, you can frame it as a romantic first big couple purchase! (Literally, a mattress was the first thing my husband and I split the cost on when we were 21. Super romantic. We definitely got our money’s worth...) If he protests the gift, suggest that you buy him the mattress now, and that when he has enough saved up, he can pay you back for it (since he had planned to save for a mattress anyway). If he still doesn’t want you to buy him a mattress, drop it. Don’t bring it up again. Allow him to do this his way and don’t criticize his choice.

Good luck, vanilla bean. We’re really proud of you for being so thoughtful and sensitive to your boyfriend’s physical and emotional needs.

And while we’re on the topic of relationships and charity...

How Dafuq Do Couples Share Their Money? 

Judging Charities Like Judgey McJudgerson: How Can Your Donation Make the Biggest Impact? 

*Neither of us is autistic. Happy to field follow-up questions if anything was unclear in the way I phrased the above.

[thekingdomheartsprincess]

when kairi died part of me felt relieved

very long rant filled with run-on sentences, over-use of bold words, and over-use of italics. you’ve been warned

I’ve been holding off on my full review and thoughts on kh3 until after I get through my second playthrough. I will say, it was an overall great game and I was pleasantly surprised by a lot. I have my issues, but I’d like to hold off until I’m finished with my regular paced play through (not speedplay) before I write all my thoughts. However, one thing I really have to get out now is how absolutely disappointed and disgusted I am by kairi’s entire existence in kh3.

And just an fyi, I set the bar low going into this for her. I wasn’t expecting much, yet somehow, I was still let down harder than I thought was actually possible.To me, the highlight of kairi’s appearance in kh3 was probably going to be because she was training with axel. Therefore, with the reasoning that axel usually gets excessive screen time---you know, the guy that should have fake died twice before his actual fake death (which I’m not complaining about, just saying)...kairi would have by default gotten some of that extra relevance right??

Wrong... in a stunning turn of events they actually left axel to the side as well. He got a few good lines in, but at the end of the day he barely fights, does anything important, and somehow has his keyblade destroyed by xemnas in his first real battle with it. I’ll get back more to the truly ridiculous lack of keyblade skills later. While I’m still on the topic of axel though, let’s talk about kairi’s use as a tool to figure out axel’s feelings and xion. Like, no problems with the whole kidnapping thing, no deep connection making. Did a lot of us expect and fear that kairi would be used as a plot device for axel’s xion memories? Yes. Does it make it any better that we were prepared for it going into kh3? For me, yeah, but the real problem is it doesn’t stop there. And axel’s feelings and memories of xion were poorly included and barely mattered anyhow

Also the whole letter writing thing axel comments on, a sad excuse for not wanting to actually provide sokai interaction. “They’re more for herself”-bullshit tbh. Someone tell square enix that if they make me play another game where my girlfriend writes me letters and I can’t respond I’m gonna lose it. *cough ffxv cough* It was a sad excuse for trying to build up sokai before end game. Plus, bad writing aside, if my girl kairi is gonna be a romantic plot device forever; you could at least let her send sora those stupid letters. The poor girl is talking to him in her head. WHY

So much opportunity here to build up sokai before the end of the game. And you know what? I don’t really care about sokai anymore, or whether its canon, or if they have any moments at all in the game. But it you are going to use it as a plot device, you could at least put some effort into it. Sokai needs to be better if it is going to have such a huge direct impact on the ending of the game. Maybe this was difficult, because this really wasn’t the game for it. Everyone has a lot going on in this game, and for sora, his focus is really on getting the people connected to his heart back. He barely even talks about riku in the game! Which is completely justified, because the boy has a lot of stress on his shoulders and a lot going on. The sokai getting thrown in basically at the last minute of the game, is like white noise in the background...that shouldn’t have been there.

The paopu fruit scene felt uncomfortable and thrown in at the wrong moment. There was opportunity for this scene at the end of kh2, or before sora left the island again for 3d. Or if some effort was put into developing sokai throughout the game (which again, I don’t think this was the game for this) it could have worked. Instead, we got a scene which really wasn’t romantic in the slightest, and pretty much had “somebody or both of them is dying/being separated tomorrow” written all over it. The scene starts out of nowhere basically, riku is quite literally shoved to the side to talk to himself, kairi sort of dismisses romantic intentions when asking sora to share it with her, and sora sort of just nods his head and rolls with it. The best part, is the imagery relating to the drawings in the cave (which is admittedly beautiful). However, this is not the sokai paopu fruit scene 7 yr old me envisioned. While I certainly don’t expect to get what I wanted to see, this is almost an insult to all of the build up to this moment in previous games.

What would have been the only wonderful and meaningful sokai scene in the game, is the one where kairi is able to help sora basically escape death and light his way through the darkness or whatever. The whole “I’m going to keep you safe now” and “you make me feel stronger” thing is really sweet as an out of context scene if I knew nothing else about kh3. The problem is, this isn’t really true. Kairi doesn’t keep sora safe, and the limits of her strength seem to be in that one cutscene. Not to mention, this already happened. We literally saw this same thing happen in kh1-and it was a better scene.

Maybe I could believe kairi’s determination behind her words if she was able to even lift her keyblade when she’s being attacked, or put up a fight against her kidnapper (i mean come on, even belle got to elbow xaldin), or finish a battle against someone who was not an alternate version of herself (or remotely believably on xehanort’s side for more than a second). Seriously, she did more with her keyblade knocking out a few heartless in kh2. That scene was actually cooler. I am truly disgusted that I have to even think that. It’s not that I thought she would go up from kh2, but I surely didn’t think she would go soooooo far down. 

They totally shot themselves in the foot with the whole merlin’s magic excuse. Axel and kairi show up as if they just got the keyblade 20 seconds before the keyblade war, yet supposedly they had unlimited time to train. Maybe we’ll get some bs excuse on how it “wasn’t exactly unlimited time” later, but seriously? If you were going to have both of them fail so miserably, you could have used the short training time as an excuse!! Why would you write yourself out of that excuse, just to give me these pathetic jokes of keyblade wielders. By all logical reasoning, if they had unlimited time to train, they should have both shown up stronger that xehanort and eraqus combined. Like did they just settle after they could shoot magic at x number of moving objects in merlin’s training facility???

She may not have done much, but by the time we saw her get mercilessly stabbed for no real logical reason I was relieved. Relieved that I might finally not have to watch this anymore, and can just go into all future kh games without having to worry about what they will do with her character. I want to say I was pissed, upset even, that they killed her off like that. Confused as to how this helps xehanort’s plan? Absolutely. I mean, wouldn’t that ruin his 7 princesses part 2 backup plan if he needed it? Wouldn’t the last key form as soon as he killed kairi? Were the 7 lights going to stop fighting him there? Was he just being a cruel dick? I don’t have the answers. But I will say that I didn’t actually get angry, until xehanort stole her fucking lines. “One sky, one destiny” She doesn’t even have that anymore. The significance of those lines, now can’t just be kairi’s but has to be shared with the man who killed her. Could it get any worse? Yes! Because sora has to go and do some strongly hinted form of self sacrifice for her again. Turning the shit show writing of kairi into probably the most detrimental part of the story. 

Now, its playing such a huge role in kh3 and future kh games. It makes the major plot point of the ending of the game suffer. There’s no kairi for me to appreciate that would make me care about her dying, the one really good moment sora shares with kairi is hardly based in reality, and what’s supposed to be used as a way for sora to prove himself doesn’t really do that. He already sacrificed himself for kairi. What more is this proving? And with no excuse for kairi’s lack of training or presence in the game, I’m confused as to how this happened or why I’m supposed to care. However Nomura needed this to end up to set up future kh games, was this really the only way to do it? 

I wish I could say I just personally cared this much about feminism in kingdom hearts, and that’s why I’m so disappointed by this complete and utter failure of writing a character, but that’s not even it. When I was little I loved kairi because she was like a new disney princess in a video game, and I was heartbroken when sora told her she couldn’t come with him for the rest of his adventure. That she would just “get in his way.” 23 year old me is still pissed and not letting go. Even more frustrating, is that square enix has (deliberately or not) ignored a large part of the fandom who just asked for a little bit better. The kairi bar was low, and square enix did the limbo rock under it. (bad joke i know, it’s 2:30 am and i should be sleeping)

I’ll shut up now, but be aware i’m screaming “and another thing about kairi in kh3!” every hour on the hour in my mind

[analyzingdestiel]

DESTIEL REVIEW OF 6X3: THE THIRD MAN

******************************************************************************************************************************************************************** SCENE 1

DEAN So we're listening to the guy with the bug in his custard? That's -- that's the, uh, the theory you want to go with?

SAM Dean, angels got to have something to do, right, now that we're post-Apocalypse?

DEAN opens a beer.

DEAN We should call Cas.

SAM You're kidding, right? [ Scoffs ] Dean, I tried. It was the first and second and third thing I did, soon as I got topside. Son of a bitch won't answer the phone.

DEAN [Sitting on a bed. ] Well, let's give it a shot. Now I lay me down to sleep. I pray to Castiel to get his feathery ass down here.

SAM You're an idiot.

DEAN Stay positive.

SAM Oh, I am positive.

DEAN Come on, Cas! Don't be a dick. We got ourselves a... plague-like situation down here, and... do you...do you copy?

SAM Like I said... [ clears throat ] son of a bitch doesn't answer -- he's right behind me, isn't he?

CASTIEL Hello.

SAM Hello?

CASTIEL Y-yes.

SAM [ Imitating Castiel ] "Hello."

[ Normal voice ] "Hello"?

CASTIEL Uh, that is still the term?

SAM I spent all that time trying to get through to you. Dean calls once, and now it's [ imitating Castiel ] "Hello"?!

CASTIEL Yes.

SAM [ Normal voice ] So, what, you -- you like him better or something? [ Scoffs ]

CASTIEL Dean and I do share a more profound bond. [ To Dean ] I wasn't gonna mention it.

DEAN Cas, I think what he's trying to say is that... he went to Hell for us. I mean, he really took one for the team. You remember that? And then he comes back without a clue, and you can't take five friggin' minutes to give him some answers?

CASTIEL [ Strongly. ] If I had any answers, I might have responded. But I don't know, Sam. We have no idea who brought you back from the cage... or why.

SAM So... it wasn't God?

CASTIEL No one's even seen God. The whole thing remains mysterious.

SAM What the hell does that mean?

CASTIEL What part of "I don't know" escapes your understanding?

DEAN Cas, look, if Sam calls, you answer. Okay? You wing your ass down here, and you tell him, "I don't know." Just because we have some sort of a -- a bond or whatever...

CASTIEL You think I came because you called? I came because of this. [ Walks to table where Dean's research is spread out. ]

DEAN Oh, well, it's nice to know what matters.

CASTIEL It does help one to focus.

********************************************************************************************************************************************************************

DESTIEL REVIEW OF SCENE 1

SAM I spent all that time trying to get through to you. Dean calls once, and now it's [ imitating Castiel ] "Hello"?!

CASTIEL Yes.

SAM [ Normal voice ] So, what, you -- you like him better or something? [ Scoffs ]

CASTIEL Dean and I do share a more profound bond. [ To Dean ] I wasn't gonna mention it.

So here Castiel confirms that Dean matters more to him than Sam. I had mentioned this in previous reviews because for me, it is obvious, but the fact that Castiel has come out and said it is important. So the times he has said "I did it for you and your brother"; he had mostly done it for Dean. Sam is secondary for Castiel and I feel this is significant to mention. If he felt the same way for Sam as he felt for Dean, the Destiel pairing wouldn't be as believable because we would consider this to be "just how Castiel behaves". Though Castiel has made it clear yet again that Dean, for him, is special.

I find it especially interesting that he turned to Dean and said "I wasn't gonna mention it", as if he felt that Dean was entirely aware.

SAM What the hell does that mean?

CASTIEL What part of "I don't know" escapes your understanding?

Castiel is cruel to Sam yet again. He often does not hold his tongue where Sam is involved. He shows much more understanding and patience where Dean is concerned.

DEAN Cas, look, if Sam calls, you answer. Okay? You wing your ass down here, and you tell him, "I don't know." Just because we have some sort of a -- a bond or whatever...

Dean here is saying this for Sam's sake, because of course he cares deeply for Sam and he wants Castiel to respect him. And I feel that after this episode, if Sam does call, that Castiel may indeed respond. If he does, it would be proof that Castiel is very loyal to Dean and basically does whatever it is Dean asks of him. He's done this before in previous episodes. I mean he sacrificed all of Heaven for Dean, because he asked him to. And then he went with the hooker because Dean asked him to. And so Dean asking this... I can almost guarantee that he will respond to Sam's call in a future episode because Dean told him to. I feel that was the reason this scene was written.

Castiel certainly is bound to Dean in particular.

CASTIEL You think I came because you called? I came because of this. [ Walks to table where Dean's research is spread out. ]

Though Castiel did come because something of import was happening, I feel he certainly would have responded to Dean's call whether he'd come for that in particular or not. Castiel has arrived to Dean merely because he'd asked in the past and I don't feel anything would have changed that. Especially considering their "bond".

This may or may not be related. Though after this episode I feel, in a way, that Castiel is trying not to feel. He said himself, when having to harm the child to get the name of the angel, that he "can't care about that" as he "doesn't have the luxury". Does this mean he is INCAPABLE of feeling, or that he has to put emotions in the back of his mind because otherwise he wouldn't be able to do what's needed to be done? I certainly feel that Castiel has emotion and that he does feel regret and guilt, as has been established in Seasons 4 and 5. So I think that what he meant by this, is that he can't allow himself to feel because if he did, he wouldn't get anything done. After all, he is a soldier.

He slices at Dean’s hand rather nonchalantly during this scene as well. But even though Castiel does have some emotion, and perhaps doing this to Dean bothered him on a minute level, it would make sense because Castiel knows Dean has dealt with much worse (such as Hell) and there’s also the fact that Castiel is most likely entirely aware that if he’d informed Dean that he needs human blood, Dean would instantly offer it.

DEAN Oh, well, it's nice to know what matters.

Dean is bothered by the fact that Castiel supposedly didn't come because he called but rather, because what they were dealing with was of import. Basically Dean feels insignificant and as if he doesn't matter to Castiel. Oh how the tables have turned.

Castiel has dealt with this sort of feeling from Dean on many occasions, especially considering Castiel is able to read minds.

After episodes where Dean showed no real care for Castiel's death, and Dean betraying Castiel, that Castiel did almost "move on from Dean" in a sense. I think it was clear that Castiel's feelings for Dean were not reciprocated. They were certainly more intense on Castiel's side than they were on Dean's. Castiel left his entire "family" for Dean's sake. He killed what he referred to as his "brothers" to save Dean. Dean would never have done that for Castiel. And who is to say that Castiel wasn't aware of this fact? He is very aware. He knows Dean.

And despite this sort of one-sided relationship, Castiel is still loyal to Dean. He still comes when he calls, and still obeys him. He does not have to do either of these things. He’s chosen to, because of what he feels for Dean.

********************************************************************************************************************************************************************

SCENE 2

RAPHAEL grabs Castiel by the collar and throws him back against a set of double doors that fall open. RAPHAEL kicks CASTIEL while he's down, then pulls him up to punch him several times. CASTIEL falls half-way down the grand staircase. RAPHAEL kicks him to the bottom and teleports there to punch CASTIEL again.

RAPHAEL [ Raising an angel blade. ] Somehow, I don't think God will be bringing you back this time.

BALTHAZAR Hey! Look at my junk. [ Holds up a glowing crystal. ]

RAPHAEL No.

RAPHAEL turns to salt from head to toe. The salt clatters to the floor.

BALTHAZAR [ Chuckles. ] Same thing happened to Lot's wife. Iodize the poor sucker, and your kitchen is stocked for life. [ Laughs. ]

CASTIEL You came back.

BALTHAZAR Well, now Raphael will have to go shopping for a new vessel. Should give me a nice long head start on him. Until next time.

CASTIEL Next time.

DEAN No time like the present. [ Flicks a lighter and drops it on a circle of holy oil that surrounds BALTHAZAR. ]

BALTHAZAR Holy fire. You hairless ape! Release me!

DEAN First you're taking your marker off of Aaron Birch's soul!

BALTHAZAR Am I?!

DEAN Sam?!

SAM Unless you like your wings extra crispy -- [ uncorks a bottle of holy oil ] -- I'd think about it.

BALTHAZAR Castiel, I stood for you in Heaven. Are you gonna let --

CASTIEL I believe... the hairless ape has the floor.

BALTHAZAR [ Laughs. ] Very well.  [ Inhales, touches his clasped hands to his forehead, exhales. ] The boy's debt is cleared. His soul is his own.

DEAN Why you buying up human souls, anyway?

BALTHAZAR In this economy? It's probably the only thing worth buying. Do you have any idea what souls are worth? What power they hold? Now... release me.

DEAN Suck it, ass clown. Nobody said anything --

CASTIEL lowers his hand, lowering the flames.

DEAN Cas, what the hell?

CASTIEL [ To BALTHAZAR. ] My debt to you is cleared.

BALTHAZAR Fair enough. [ Sound of an angel in flight. ]

DEAN Cas, are you out of your mind?!

CASTIEL disappears.

********************************************************************************************************************************************************************

DESTIEL REVIEW OF SCENE 2

Balthazar is considered a "good friend" to Castiel. He is also referred to as a "brother". Castiel refers to all other angels as his brothers. So this would, in a way, be the equivalent to what Sam and Dean have. Though what Dean and Sam have may be more intense, Balthazar is ultimately Castiel’s brother. I mention this because Castiel sides with Dean in the next scene, despite this fact.

Balthazar saves Castiel from Raphael. Castiel even uses the all-common phrase used between lovers in romance movies "you came back". This shows that Castiel hadn't expected him to come back, and especially not to save him. This also goes to show that his siding with Dean is not entirely easy though he does it none the less. Dean never ceases to be number one in Castiel’s life.

DEAN No time like the present. [ Flicks a lighter and drops it on a circle of holy oil that surrounds BALTHAZAR. ]

BALTHAZAR Holy fire. You hairless ape! Release me!

BALTHAZAR Castiel, I stood for you in Heaven. Are you gonna let --

CASTIEL I believe... the hairless ape has the floor.

Despite the fact that Balthazar just saved Castiel, Castiel allows Dean to "take the floor". He sacrificed his "brother" for Dean's sake yet again. He also did this, I feel, so Balthazar would give the child his soul back. You could say Castiel made this decision for both Dean and the child. Perhaps he did it for the child in the first place because he realized Dean cared. Or perhaps Castiel truly did care for the child and he knew it was the right thing to do. Though ultimately he sided with Dean over the man who just saved his life and so I feel that could be note-worthy. Castiel even uses the term "hairless ape", as Balthazar did, basically as a way to "stick it to him". Meaning he was displeased with Balthazar for referring to Dean as such. It can be viewed as Destiel-related or it can be viewed as Castiel doing “the right thing”. I feel it’s both. I suppose it depends on the viewer.

********************************************************************************************************************************************************************

DESTIEL REVIEW FOR EPISODE OVERALL

So we have confirmation that Castiel favors Dean. Though this was obvious even if unspoken in previous episodes. Outside of Heaven, the number one thing that matters, is Dean. And even with Heaven included, Dean is number one, because as we all know, Castiel basically in one way or another, gave up Heaven for Dean's sake. So as usual, Castiel loves Dean.

Dean shows that he does care about Castiel. It feels almost as if he views Castiel as a business partner though we do know Dean considers him a friend as he's referred to him as such in previous episodes.

The rating doesn't go up or down as I was already aware of these things.

DESTIEL RATING AFTER EPISODE (based on how believable): 4.5/10

[bbclesmis]

Lily Collins Gets Candid: GLAMOUR’s December cover star on Les Misérables and success on HER terms

2018 was the year of fearless female performances but THE TV Christmas blockbuster, Les Misérables, saves the best for last with Lily Collins’ star turn as Fantine. Here she navigates the minefield of millennial dating, -13°C locations and a late-twenties crisis with GLAMOUR’S Josh Newis-Smith.

“I’ve been ghosted more times than I care to admit,” Lily confesses, as we discuss the minefield that is millennial dating. Adorned in a slouchy black hoodie with her hair scraped back into a care-free ponytail and barely a lick of make-up, Lily could be any twenty-something in debrief mode.

In fact, the only indication that this is a Golden Globe nominee who since starting to act at the age of two, has carved a place for herself as a go-to starlet – in such varied roles in Rules Don’t Apply, Mirror Mirror and Love, Rosie- is the vast Hollywood home that plays backdrop to our interview and her GLAMOUR cover shoot.

About to hit our screens in her career-defining role as Fantine, who is dumped unceremoniously by her lover - Victorian ghosting if you will - and left to fend for her child alone, we are musing on how, just like the iconic character, Lily has navigated her own fair share of heart ache. “There are times when I’ve [been on dates and] thought we had a great time and then I’ve never heard from the guy again,” she continues. With this level of ‘gal pal’ magnetism it’s no wonder she has garnered 11 million Instagram followers, and counting. “Sometimes that happens after one date, a couple of dates or one month. I would prefer people to be honest with me, as I live like that. I don’t think it will be something I can ever figure out. The good thing is that we all have the same issues.” Alexa, play Thank U, Next by Ariana Grande...

Both 29 years old, we quickly bond over that late-twenties crisis, too. “Everyone in their late twenties goes through it a bit, because we’re heading to the big 3-0,” she reassures me. “But I think I had a quarter-life crisis at 25 where I kept asking, ‘Am I at where I wish to be at?’ I never really set out as a kid with markers of when I want to get married or have kids. But I got to the age where you constantly compare yourself to your friends or other people in your industry.”

It’s this level of realism that makes her performance as the ultimate fallen female, Fantine, so damn relatable, despite the fact it was shot in inconceivable sub-zero conditions in Brussels over a grueling five-month period. One scene, in the opening episode, sees a thoroughly modern-feeling Fantine squatting in the bushes alongside her wing women, discussing the gents on offer. “When our director, Tom (Shankland) was describing it as, ‘You are going to be squatting, having a chat,’ I thought, ‘Well, I can’t say I haven’t done that,’” Lily laughs. “People have been doing this for centuries – that camaraderie between women and men going to the bathroom and having chats, where it’s all about the subtext and the looks.”  

Alas, poor Fantine didn’t have a rival nightclub to the local tavern, or Tinder, in her weaponry to help find a knight in shining armour to rescue her from her inevitable fall. Swiping right isn’t something that interests Lily, either. “I’ve never tried a dating app,” she exclaims with her trademark eyebrows alive with energy. “Lots of my friends have, but it’s just that I don’t know how I would. LA is very much where I spent most of my time growing up, so I know the places I am not going to go to meet somebody and I also realise that when you’re not looking, you find it.”

Lily is grounded, which is no mean feat given that she grew up surrounded by fame as the daughter of the Easy Lover hitmaker, Phil Collins. There’s no name-checking of famous faces, only her closest pals, a pool of Californian friends from Harvard-Westlake School who have enabled her to achieve that much-lauded term: balance. She has worked hard to have her Destiny’s Child ‘Independent Woman’ moment.

“Growing up I never wanted that to be a part of my story,” Lily confides. “Obviously I’m super-proud of my dad; I love my dad, I’m grateful for all the things I’ve learned, but it’s also something I wanted to define as my own. I always wanted to do it myself and for myself. There are so many people who want to do what I do, a name is not going to get you a job, and it shouldn’t. I can look back and be so proud I did it on my own. People assume it’s a lot easier when you have that name, but if you’re the kind of person who doesn’t want to use it, it’s a lot harder.”

Part of Lily taking control of her own narrative involved her penning her memoir, Unfiltered: No Shame, No Regrets, Just Me just under two years ago, something that she regards as the “most cathartic, therapeutic experience, in a way I didn’t anticipate”. In the emotional read, Lily confesses to hacking away at those eyebrows to fit in with the skinny-browed girls at school, details an unnamed emotionally abusive relationship, discusses a long and winding journey with eating disorders, and contains an open letter, forgiving her father, “for not always being there,” during her childhood after moving from Surrey to LA with her mother, Jill Tavelman following her parents’ divorce. For an industry in which personal lives are hidden by a velvet curtain, it was beyond brave.

Reminiscing, Lily details how the book’s direction took an unexpected turn, “I realised I was carrying so much baggage that, when it came to work, I couldn’t take on the baggage of my character. I felt a bit like a fraud to myself if I didn’t unleash – or at least get off my chest – these things, to move on and go into the next phase of my life. In life, when you dig the deepest and talk about the most uncomfortable things, that’s the time you’ll connect with most people because that’s when you’re being the ‘realest’. The hardest things to talk about will always be the most relatable, because no one wants to show them; they’re awkward.”

Used to shedding excess baggage, Lily had to leave everything at the French border to play what is set to become a career-defining role as Fantine. As she proudly scrolls through her phone to show her transformation from debutante darling to shaven-haired dishevelled wench, her enthusiasm is as big as her brows as she details the most testing part of taking on this role. “The material, the location, the temperature,” she admits were the biggest challenges. But it’s clear she relished getting gritty. “It was so perfect, but at one point it was -13°C in Brussels. It was mental preparation of not just understanding the psychology of what she’s going through, but also the gruelling shooting experience that we were all in. Dressed in little material towards the end, it was about pushing through mentally. Obviously, I saw the end in sight. I dive in 110%. If I’m freezing, tired and bruised from shooting, I lean into that with the character.”

In a year where toxic masculinity has led to outpourings of female empowerment, it seems an ideal time to revisit the treatment of this infamous female character; something that isn’t lost on Lily. “When she falls, she falls so hard. But she’s willing to stay down there if it means providing for her child. It’s very poignant over what’s happening in today’s world. When we’re at our lowest, we still have our sense of self and are willing to fight back and use our voice. That really resonated with me.”

How does she feel in the wake of the year where Hollywood finally got woke on the abuse of power? “It’s great to see the camaraderie that’s come from it. Women coming forward with these issues are being embraced. Whether it’s in the pay gap or having more female directors, writers, and making sure there are just as many women and men on movie sets – hopefully one day this won’t even have to be a conversation. That’s my hope that we won’t have to say, ‘’I’m so glad you’re hired because you’re a female. It should be that you are known for your skill level… Right now, it’s fantastic, but it shouldn’t be why a woman is defined as amazing.”

As a result, Lily is feeling more empowered than ever before. “Yeah, I am, 100%,” she says. “I’ve realised that I can’t control what other people think of what I have to say, but I can control how I say it and where it’s coming from. So many women have come out and spoken about things that people would have assumed would have been the end of them. Now it is embraced for us to speak out. I’m attracted so strongly to people who are brave and outspoken and very much themselves, so I thought, ‘Why can’t I be that?’ It takes practice and I’m not fully there yet, but I’m doing my best to take those steps.”

This self-crafted confidence is exactly why Lily was attracted to the challenge of creating and directing her own GLAMOUR shoot, shot on a mobile phone during a fitting with super-stylists Rob Zangardi and Mariel Haenn. “I love expressing different sides of myself,” she exclaims, referencing her Giambattista Valli gown she wore for her cover. “It’s a process that allows me to constantly surprise myself, rediscover and push myself in ways I wouldn’t have felt comfortable with a couple of years ago.” One thing is for certain, you shouldn’t underestimate this ultimate Hollywood ‘doer’; she curled her own hair and specifically asked for the pictures not to be retouched, too.

Away from Hollywood and couture, Lily will be living her best Cameron Diaz lyf circa The Holiday this Christmas. “It’s my time to switch off from my job, sleep in and be British – I love holing myself away where no one can bother me. I love being in the countryside, outside London, with my mum. We get our tree, we have decorations from when I’m younger. We cook. We have fires and watch old movies,” Lily shares in a manner of an over-excited elf.

It’s safe to say the Christmas cracker that will really bring a bang to your festivities is Lily Collins in Les Misérables. Plus, dear wise men and women, this star with her rare empowering gifts is well worth following, far and wide.

Les Misérables will start on the BBC on 30th December. (x)

[lilycollinsnews]

Lily Collins Gets Candid: GLAMOUR’s December cover star on Les Misérables and success on HER terms

2018 was the year of fearless female performances but THE TV Christmas blockbuster, Les Misérables, saves the best for last with Lily Collins’ star turn as Fantine. Here she navigates the minefield of millennial dating, -13°C locations and a late-twenties crisis with GLAMOUR’S Josh Newis-Smith.

“I’ve been ghosted more times than I care to admit,” Lily confesses, as we discuss the minefield that is millennial dating. Adorned in a slouchy black hoodie with her hair scraped back into a care-free ponytail and barely a lick of make-up, Lily could be any twenty-something in debrief mode.

In fact, the only indication that this is a Golden Globe nominee who since starting to act at the age of two, has carved a place for herself as a go-to starlet in such varied roles in Rules Don’t Apply, Mirror Mirror and Love, Rosie- is the vast Hollywood home that plays backdrop to our interview and her GLAMOUR cover shoot.

I’ve been ghosted more times than I care to admit… I would prefer people to be honest with me, as I live like that. I don’t think it will be something I can ever figure out. The good thing is that we all have the same issues 

ON DATING

About to hit our screens in her career-defining role as Fantine, who is dumped unceremoniously by her lover - Victorian ghosting if you will - and left to fend for her child alone, we are musing on how, just like the iconic character, Lily has navigated her own fair share of heart ache. 

“There are times when I’ve [been on dates and] thought we had a great time and then I’ve never heard from the guy again,” she continues. With this level of ‘gal pal’ magnetism it’s no wonder she has garnered 11 million Instagram followers, and counting. “Sometimes that happens after one date, a couple of dates or one month. I would prefer people to be honest with me, as I live like that. I don’t think it will be something I can ever figure out. The good thing is that we all have the same issues.” Alexa, play Thank U, Next by Ariana Grande...

Both 29 years old, we quickly bond over that late-twenties crisis, too. “Everyone in their late twenties goes through it a bit, because we’re heading to the big 3-0,” she reassures me. 

“But I think I had a quarter-life crisis at 25 where I kept asking, ‘Am I at where I wish to be at?’ I never really set out as a kid with markers of when I want to get married or have kids. But I got to the age where you constantly compare yourself to your friends or other people in your industry.”

It’s this level of realism that makes her performance as the ultimate fallen female, Fantine, so damn relatable, despite the fact it was shot in inconceivable sub-zero conditions in Brussels over a grueling five-month period. One scene, in the opening episode, sees a thoroughly modern-feeling Fantine squatting in the bushes alongside her wing women, discussing the gents on offer. 

“When our director, Tom (Shankland) was describing it as, ‘You are going to be squatting, having a chat,’ I thought, ‘Well, I can’t say I haven’t done that,’” Lily laughs. “People have been doing this for centuries – that camaraderie between women and men going to the bathroom and having chats, where it’s all about the subtext and the looks.”

Growing up I never wanted that to be a part of my story… People assume it’s a lot easier when you have that name, but if you’re the kind of person who doesn’t want to use it, it’s a lot harder.

ON HER FAMOUS SURNAME

Alas, poor Fantine didn’t have a rival nightclub to the local tavern, or Tinder, in her weaponry to help find a knight in shining armour to rescue her from her inevitable fall. Swiping right isn’t something that interests Lily, either. ���I’ve never tried a dating app,” she exclaims with her trademark eyebrows alive with energy. “Lots of my friends have, but it’s just that I don’t know how I would. LA is very much where I spent most of my time growing up, so I know the places I am not going to go to meet somebody and I also realise that when you’re not looking, you find it.”

Lily is grounded, which is no mean feat given that she grew up surrounded by fame as the daughter of the Easy Lover hitmaker, Phil Collins. There’s no name-checking of famous faces, only her closest pals, a pool of Californian friends from Harvard-Westlake School who have enabled her to achieve that much-lauded term: balance. She has worked hard to have her Destiny’s Child ‘Independent Woman’ moment.

Why we've got such a style crush on Lily Collins

LILY COLLINS

Why we've got such a style crush on Lily Collins

“Growing up I never wanted that to be a part of my story,” Lily confides. “Obviously I’m super-proud of my dad; I love my dad, I’m grateful for all the things I’ve learned, but it’s also something I wanted to define as my own. I always wanted to do it myself and for myself. There are so many people who want to do what I do, a name is not going to get you a job, and it shouldn’t. I can look back and be so proud I did it on my own. People assume it’s a lot easier when you have that name, but if you’re the kind of person who doesn’t want to use it, it’s a lot harder.”

When you dig the deepest and talk about the most uncomfortable things, that’s the time you’ll connect with most people because that’s when you’re being the ‘realest’. The hardest things to talk about will always be the most relatable because no one wants to show them; they’re awkward.

ON SHARING HER PERSONAL STRUGGLES

Part of Lily taking control of her own narrative involved her penning her memoir, Unfiltered: No Shame, No Regrets, Just Mejust under two years ago, something that she regards as the “most cathartic, therapeutic experience, in a way I didn’t anticipate”. In the emotional read, Lily confesses to hacking away at those eyebrows to fit in with the skinny-browed girls at school, details an unnamed emotionally abusive relationship, discusses a long and winding journey with eating disorders, and contains an open letter, forgiving her father, “for not always being there,” during her childhood after moving from Surrey to LA with her mother, Jill Tavelman following her parents’ divorce. For an industry in which personal lives are hidden by a velvet curtain, it was beyond brave.

Reminiscing, Lily details how the book’s direction took an unexpected turn, “I realised I was carrying so much baggage that, when it came to work, I couldn’t take on the baggage of my character. I felt a bit like a fraud to myself if I didn’t unleash – or at least get off my chest – these things, to move on and go into the next phase of my life. In life, when you dig the deepest and talk about the most uncomfortable things, that’s the time you’ll connect with most people because that’s when you’re being the ‘realest’. The hardest things to talk about will always be the most relatable, because no one wants to show them; they’re awkward.”

At one point it was -13°C in Austria… dressed in little material towards the end, it was about pushing through mentally. I dive in 110%. If I’m freezing, tired and bruised from shooting, I lean into that with the character.

ON PLAYING FANTINE

Used to shedding excess baggage, Lily had to leave everything at the French border to play what is set to become a career-defining role as Fantine. As she proudly scrolls through her phone to show her transformation from debutante darling to shaven-haired dishevelled wench, her enthusiasm is as big as her brows as she details the most testing part of taking on this role. “The material, the location, the temperature,” she admits were the biggest challenges. But it’s clear she relished getting gritty. “It was so perfect, but at one point it was -13°C in Brussels. It was mental preparation of not just understanding the psychology of what she’s going through, but also the gruelling shooting experience that we were all in. Dressed in little material towards the end, it was about pushing through mentally. Obviously, I saw the end in sight. I dive in 110%. If I’m freezing, tired and bruised from shooting, I lean into that with the character.”

In a year where toxic masculinity has led to outpourings of female empowerment, it seems an ideal time to revisit the treatment of this infamous female character; something that isn’t lost on Lily. “When she falls, she falls so hard. But she’s willing to stay down there if it means providing for her child. It’s very poignant over what’s happening in today’s world. When we’re at our lowest, we still have our sense of self and are willing to fight back and use our voice. That really resonated with me.”

I’m attracted so strongly to people who are brave and outspoken and very much themselves, so I thought, ‘Why can’t I be that?’ It takes practice and I’m not fully there yet, but I’m doing my best to take those steps.ON 2018’S CRUSADERS

How does she feel in the wake of the year where Hollywood finally got woke on the abuse of power? “It’s great to see the camaraderie that’s come from it. Women coming forward with these issues are being embraced. Whether it’s in the pay gap or having more female directors, writers, and making sure there are just as many women and men on movie sets – hopefully one day this won’t even have to be a conversation. That’s my hope that we won’t have to say, ‘’I’m so glad you’re hired because you’re a female. It should be that you are known for your skill level… Right now, it’s fantastic, but it shouldn’t be why a woman is defined as amazing.”

As a result, Lily is feeling more empowered than ever before. “Yeah, I am, 100%,” she says. “I’ve realised that I can’t control what other people think of what I have to say, but I can control how I say it and where it’s coming from. So many women have come out and spoken about things that people would have assumed would have been the end of them. Now it is embraced for us to speak out. I’m attracted so strongly to people who are brave and outspoken and very much themselves, so I thought, ‘Why can’t I be that?’ It takes practice and I’m not fully there yet, but I’m doing my best to take those steps.”

This self-crafted confidence is exactly why Lily was attracted to the challenge of creating and directing her own GLAMOUR shoot, shot on a mobile phone during a fitting with super-stylists Rob Zangardi and Mariel Haenn. “I love expressing different sides of myself,” she exclaims, referencing her Giambattista Valli gown she wore for her cover. “It’s a process that allows me to constantly surprise myself, rediscover and push myself in ways I wouldn’t have felt comfortable with a couple of years ago.” One thing is for certain, you shouldn’t underestimate this ultimate Hollywood ‘doer’; she curled her own hair and specifically asked for the pictures not to be retouched, too.

That’s my hope that we won’t have to say, ‘’I’m so glad you’re hired because you’re a female. It should be that you are known for your skill level… Right now, it’s fantastic, but it shouldn’t be why a woman is defined as amazing. 

ON HOPES FOR FUTURE FEMALES

Away from Hollywood and couture, Lily will be living her best Cameron Diaz lyf circa The Holiday this Christmas. “It’s my time to switch off from my job, sleep in and be British – I love holing myself away where no one can bother me. I love being in the countryside, outside London, with my mum. We get our tree, we have decorations from when I’m younger. We cook. We have fires and watch old movies,” Lily shares in a manner of an over-excited elf.

It’s safe to say the Christmas cracker that will really bring a bang to your festivities is Lily Collins in Les Misérables. Plus, dear wise men and women, this star with her rare empowering gifts is well worth following, far and wide.

Les Misérables will start on the BBC on 30th December.