#im very much obsessed with “what if...?”

[hsnlv]

bittersweet | s.jy

synopsis: caught in a dangerous dance of passion and obsession, you’re drawn to sim jaeyun’s intoxicating pull. his love is chaotic, his touch addictive, and though it threatens to destroy you, you can’t help but fall deeper—willing to break if it means keeping him.

warning: a little suggestive at one point, a little manipulative too, reader is obsessed with jake that they would do anything for him.

wc: 2.1k

a/n: this is very much inspired by bittersuite by billie eilish! but im pretty sure i misinterpreted some of the lyrics used in this story. and just a reminder that each lyrics will bring you to a different scenario. enjoy reading!

i can’t fall in love with you

“(y/n), you know he’s no good for you!” your friend’s voice rings in your ears, louder than the music thumping in the background. their frustration is palpable as they watch you, once again, drift into thoughts about him.

sim jaeyun.

his name is a song in your head, a melody you can’t stop humming. he’s the kind of beautiful that should come with a warning, the kind of dangerous that leaves you breathless.

“you don’t get it,” you mutter, trying to shake off the words as your eyes roam the room, searching.

“no, you don’t get it!” they snap, stepping in front of you, forcing your attention back to them.

“you’re setting yourself up to get hurt, and for what? some guy who’s going to break your heart like it’s nothing?”

you swallow the lump in your throat, unwilling to admit they might be right. but it doesn’t matter. none of it matters.

because there he is.

jaeyun.

leaning against the wall like he owns the place, his sharp features softened by the dim light. your heart stumbles, skips, then races ahead, and suddenly, nothing else exists.

you don’t even realize you’ve walked away until your friend’s voice fades into the distance.

i was on my knees, outside of my body, watchin’ from above, i see the way you want me

“good girl,” he murmurs as he leans down, his lips brushing against your ear.

his voice is silk, smooth and warm, wrapping around you like a spell. his hands find your waist, pulling you closer, steadying you as your knees threaten to give out. his fingers press just hard enough to leave you breathless.

the room fades. the smell of alcohol, the chatter of voices, the dull bass in the background—it all disappears. all that’s left is him. his touch. his scent. his voice.

you tilt your head up to meet his gaze, and for a moment, you swear the world stops spinning. he looks at you like you’re something he’s been searching for, something precious.

“jaeyun,” you whisper, his name barely audible.

“yes, pretty girl?”

and that’s it. you’re gone. your resolve crumbles, your heart collapses, and you know—you know—that no matter how much this will hurt, you’ll fall every single time.

i gotta be careful, gotta watch what i say, God, i hope it all goes away

“jaeyun, i love—”

the words almost slip, a confession hanging in the air between you. but you catch yourself just in time, swallowing the rest of the sentence before it can escape.

his head tilts, a sly grin tugging at his lips. “love what, baby?”

his voice is slow, deliberate, laced with the kind of mischief that makes your chest tighten. he knows exactly what you almost said, and he’s enjoying every second of your hesitation.

you can’t answer. you won’t. because if you do, everything will change, and you’re not sure you’re ready for that. your heart beats too fast, your pulse pounding in your ears as his gaze holds you in place.

but it’s torture.

you saw the way he looked at her earlier.

you saw the way he leaned in, the way his eyes followed her.

your stomach twists at the memory, jealousy clawing its way up your throat. but you can’t bring yourself to call him out. you won’t, because if you do, you’ll have to admit how much it hurts.

and it does. God, it hurts.

because no matter how much it stings, no matter how many times you tell yourself you should walk away, you only fall harder.

he’s a drug, and you’re addicted.

“come on, baby,” he coaxes, his hand brushing against your cheek, his thumb tracing your jawline. “you love what?”

your walls are crumbling, brick by brick, and you don’t know how much longer you can hold them up.

you know he’s bad for you.

but…

cause i can’t fall in love with you, no matter how bad i want to

the mantra loops in your head, a desperate attempt to remind yourself of the truth.

dont. fall. in. love. with. him.

but the truth is a lie.

his arm tightens around your waist, pulling you closer until there’s no space left between you. your breathing is uneven, your body trembling as his lips graze your neck.

he sleeps soundly beside you now, his chest rising and falling in a rhythm that feels too peaceful for the chaos he’s caused inside you.

"so fucking sweet," he murmured, his breath hot against your ear as he pounded into you, as if you were the only thing that existed to him in that moment.

"doing so good for me, hm? so good, so sweet," he whispered, his hand brushing your cheek so softly. for just a second, his eyes looked at you like he loved you. and that second was all it took to unravel you completely.

your fingers brush over the marks he left on your skin, the evidence of his touch still fresh. you close your eyes, replaying the night in vivid detail—the way he whispered your name, the way he moved, the way he looked at you like you were the only thing that mattered.

for a moment, you let yourself believe it.

because for a brief second, he looked like he was in love with you.

but you know better.

you know he won’t be here when you wake up.

and yet, you’d do it all again.

but if pain is the price you pay to have him like this, to feel his touch, his presence, you'll take it. again and again, until there's nothing left of you to give. because it’s the only thing that makes you feel alive.

i don’t need to breathe when you look at me, all i see is green

his eyes meet yours across the room, and the world falls away. everything else—every voice, every sound, every breath—disappears in an instant. it’s just him now.

green. deep and dangerous, like a forest that tempts you to wander too far in, knowing you’ll never make it out.

he doesn’t have to speak. doesn’t have to move. just looking at you is enough to leave you gasping for air, and somehow, you don’t care.

“you’re quiet tonight,” he says as he approaches, his tone soft but heavy with meaning.

you shrug, trying to play it cool, but your heart is pounding too loudly for you to hear your own thoughts.

“what’s on your mind?” he asks, leaning closer. his hand brushes against yours, just barely, but it sends a shiver up your spine.

you want to tell him everything. how he’s the only thing you think about. how the sound of his voice lingers long after he’s gone. how his absence feels like a weight pressing down on your chest.

but you don’t.

“nothing,” you lie, though the way you look at him says otherwise.

he smirks, his gaze dipping to your lips before meeting your eyes again. “is that so?”

i think that we’re in between everything i’ve seen, in my dream

“you’re overthinking again,” he says, his voice laced with that disarming calm that always makes you second-guess yourself. His fingers graze your cheek, tipping your head just enough so you have to look at him.

“don’t,” you murmur, but the word barely escapes your lips.

“don’t what?” he counters, his tone deceptively soft, as if he’s confused. But the glint in his eyes tells you he knows exactly what he’s doing. “Don’t remind you of what we are? Of what you keep running from?”

you shift under his gaze, but he doesn’t let you pull away. his hand is firm, grounding you, as if he’s anchoring you in place, forcing you to stay in this moment.

“why do you do this?” you ask, your voice trembling, betraying the resolve you desperately want to cling to.

his smirk is subtle, almost imperceptible, but it cuts through you all the same. “because I know you,” he says, the confidence in his tone rattling something inside you. “better than anyone else ever could.”

“you don’t—”

“i do,” he interrupts, his voice steady now, his hand sliding to your jaw. “and you hate that, don’t you? you hate how much you feel for me. you hate that no one else makes you feel this way.”

your heart races, and you know he can feel it.

“but it’s okay,” he continues, his voice dropping to a whisper. “you don’t have to admit it yet. i’m patient. i’ll wait.”

the way he says it, so sure, so certain, makes your stomach twist. because deep down, you know he’s already won.

i don’t need to breathe when you look at me, all i see is green

the tension between you simmers, unspoken but undeniable, a charged thread pulling you together even as you test the limits of its strength. his gaze is sharp, piercing, watching your every move as if he’s memorizing you in real time. you know he hates it—hates the way your attention drifts toward the edges of the room, where other figures stand, laughing, drinking, and existing in a world that doesn’t revolve around him.

but your world? it does.

you don’t need anyone else in this room. you never did. but sometimes, the only way to keep him tethered is to let the rope fray. to make him feel the sting of what it’s like to lose you, even if just for a second.

you seem so paranoid, i’m looking at the boys, i’ve never filled the void, out of spite.

you glance at the guy near the bar���just a second too long, just enough to make it noticeable.

you hear him before you feel him. the sharp inhale, the muted scoff. then his fingers are at your waist, curling around you like a warning, pulling you back against him. his touch is firm, possessive, almost bruising, but it’s the kind of pain that makes your pulse quicken.

“you’re playing a dangerous game,” he mutters, his breath hot against your ear.

“what game?” you ask, your voice dripping with feigned innocence, even as a small smirk tugs at the corner of your lips.

his jaw tightens, his muscles clenching under your hand as you rest it lightly against his arm. he’s trying to stay composed, to keep the fire in check, but you’ve already struck the match.

“you’re looking at them like you want something,” he says, his voice low, smooth like honey but edged with steel. “but we both know they could never give you what i do.”

he’s right, of course. they couldn’t. but that’s not the point.

you seem so paralyzed, it’s so romanticized,

his grip softens slightly, his thumb brushing against your side, and for a moment, you forget why you started this in the first place.

when your eyes meet his, the room seems to shift. everything fades—music, voices, the low hum of conversation. it’s just the two of you, locked in this intoxicating push and pull, this endless cycle of destruction and devotion.

you hate how much you need him. you hate how easily he pulls you back every time you try to let go. but there’s something about the way he looks at you, like you’re the only thing that matters, that makes you crave the chaos.

“you like this, don’t you?” he says softly, his lips brushing against your temple. “you like making me crazy.”

you don’t answer, but he doesn’t need you to. he knows.

if this is how i die, that’s alright.

his touch is slow, deliberate, like he knows exactly how to unravel you. his fingers trace the line of your collarbone, dipping just enough to make your breath hitch. his lips hover over your ear, his voice dark and smooth, sending shivers down your spine.

"you're shaking," he murmurs, his breath warm against your skin. "but you're not pulling away. why is that?"

you swallow hard, your throat dry, your mind clouded with the weight of his presence.

"because I-" but the words falter, caught somewhere between truth and fear.

he smirks, and it's almost cruel, the way he looks at you-like he knows the power he holds, like he knows you've already surrendered. his hands slide lower, grazing your waist, pulling you closer until there's no space left between you.

"you can't help yourself, can you?" he says softly, his tone laced with mock sympathy. "you want this. you want me."

your breath catches, the heat of his words burning through every defense you've tried to build. you don't respond, but the silence is enough. he knows. he's always known.

his lips press to your neck, slow and searing, each kiss leaving a mark that feels like it's branding you as his. his grip tightens, not enough to hurt, but enough to remind you who's in control.

"you let me do this to you," he whispers, his voice dripping with possession. "you let me have you, over and over, and you never stop me. why?"

you don't have an answer. maybe there isn't one. maybe it's because you've always been drawn to him, even when you knew you shouldn't be. maybe it's because he's everything you shouldn't want but can't resist.

his lips move to your ear, his voice now a low growl. "because you love me. even if it ruins you, even if it destroys everything else, you'll always love me."

and he's right. you hate how right he is. because as his hands roam your body, as his lips claim yours in a way that feels both heaven and hell, you know you're his. completely. utterly.

if this is how you lose yourself-if this is how you die-you'll let him. because being his feels like the only way you're alive.

[samytheshoulderdemon]

Just some stuff I scribbled on a white board 💀💀💀 literally no one but me can actually read it-

AND NO I DONT SHIP JIMMOTHY AND CURLY I DREW THEM LIKE THAT AS A JOKE BECAUSE JIMMY'S OBSESSED W/ BECOMING CURLY ISK WHAT TO TELL YOU 💀💀💀

He seemed way to interested in curly tbh 😔😔

[it's okay if u ship them I just don't very much 🧍🏼🧍🏼🧍🏼 if anything, I see it as one sided]

Run away curly

Roll

ALSO IM LITERALLY GAY jfhdjd I promise I'm not against the lgbtqs 🙏🙏🙏 I wrote this stuff as a joke lmao

[temeyes]

had i met you earlier, would you've been fine? would you've been mine?

[blvck-minou]

It's not a lake, it's an ocean

[heph]

Call me crazy for reading so much into a show like House MD but I think the main theme of House is that despite doing everything perfectly and being a good person, shit happens.

Sickness and pain will be inflicted on you and your loved ones and there's nothing you can do about it, but to persevere, to fight for your life, to keep living despite it all - to love is a part of the human condition; our capability of love is what makes life worth living, despite all the pain that you will inevitably experience.

This show exemplifies the pain of living and the needs and desires of human beings to keep going despite it all

And idk... There's something beautiful about how a show with so many stupid whimsical dumb scenes can impart something so profound in my stupid little brain

[yuwuta]

gojo would kill your work husband. but if he were the work husband, that's a different story

REAL!! he’s such a hypocrite because if someone mentioned you had a work husband, his entire world would stop and he wold devise the absolute worst plans to make sure that your co-worker, everyone at your job, and everyone in the next building over knew that he was happily committed to you 

but if he is the work husband, he’s very........ dutiful in his role. there’s a loose office/lawyer au in my head where satoru is your secretary, and for all intents and purposes, your personal assistant, and he’s good at his job, but mostly because he considers his job to be pleasing you. he has coffee for you when you arrive, he moves your schedule around without you asking, he has answers to questions before you can even ask them, he has fresh flowers on your desk weekly, pokes into your meetings to pretend to hand you a file that’s really just maybe a single document in a manilla folder with candy on top of it—he’s made himself your business, your partner; he’s made himself irreplaceable, and he loves to remind everybody of that fact. 

he’s also extremely loyal. sure, he could day a week’s worth of work done in about a day, but that doesn’t mean he’ll just use his talents for anybody. he’s your secretary, so he’s at your beck and call, and everyone knows it. they know he’s the best, but also that he’s off limits—not because you won’t share him, but because satoru won’t let himself be shared. 

he also extends his duties beyond work, of course. when he hands you a print out of your schedule for the day and you’re confused by the three-hour block of time you have in the middle of the day, satoru just helps you shrug your coat of your shoulders and smiles, “that’s for the lunch date you have with me, of course!” hanging up your coat in your closet for you, “i’m paying, see you soon, sweets.” and because you’re great at your job, and satoru helps you be great, nobody really questions when the two of you have time for a 13-course tasting menu at 1pm on a tuesday afternoon. and if they did, all satoru would say that you two had a lovely date 

[i-may-be-an-emu]

WHAT AM I MEANT TO SAY WHEN PEOPLE ASK ABOUT MY HOBBIES LIKE OH. IM VERY OBSESSED WITH AN IMPROV GROUP FROM LONDON. YEAH WHEN I THINK ABOUT THEM I SMILE LIKE A MANIAC AND I’VE CRIED BECAUSE THEY MEAN SO MUCH TO ME MULTIPLE TIMES. WHAT ARE YOUR HOBBIES?

[katabay]

original thief series basso & garrett :)

ngl, it's about quality over quantity for me. an npc can have a total of three minutes of screen time, but if they have a cool name, they can live rent free in my head and I'll spend several hours trying to decipher drawable features from a blurry screenshot of pixels

there is a vague hint of a story here, and that's because every time I try to play thi4f, I get incredibly frustrated with how Not Fun the game play is. like, is the story good? well. but it has a PLAGUE. that should've given it instant 'I'll replay this once a year' status in my heart, but the game play sucks so bad that I've never finished it. I can't believe Not Fun gameplay beat out my obsession with narrative plagues.

anyway, the idea is basically if the original era had a game with a plague centric narrative and some other stuff I liked out of thi4f thrown into a narrative blender, with a heavy dash of horror thrown in because some parts of the thief games were scarier to me than entire dedicated horror genre games.

⭐ places I’m at! bsky / pixiv / pillowfort /cohost / cara.app

[kyurochurro]

bro thinks he’s esnupi!! 🎸🎶🐶 (he is)

I found this little rocker snoopy on Pinterest and immediately thought of George.. I just had to draw them together!! 🤭

george harrison irl ☝️

[xxplastic-cubexx]

From the same Storm mini-series 🥹

THE FAM 🥺

[ponchizs]

I’m in love with how they are giving so many subtle hints about Alhaitham and Kaveh’s relationship and how important it is to Alhaitham, despite the way they always seem to be bickering.

Throughout the 3.2 archon quest Alhaitham tells us that the reason why he is so interested in helping Sumeru is because he doesn’t want his daily life to change. After that Kaveh starts being mentioned very frequently by him or we hear other people in the akademiya complain about how they daily argue.

Then, of course, we meet them both arguing with each other in the House of Daena, which was quite the argument. We also know many of their casual interactions and how they go to the café/bar frequently together. Furthermore, Alhaitham pays all of Kaveh’s bills (something no one would do for someone they don't care for).

And now, during Alhaitham’s quest, their tones were so soft (At least in JP and CN) and also domestic. Kaveh seems to worry a lot about Alhaitham and exchanges glances with him, which made me melt inside. I also love how Alhaitham is constantly smiling while bickering with kaveh. Remember, we dont see him smiling like this that often. Which means he really enjoys it. I really liked how after the second time Kaveh asked him if he is okay, he replied with a tease about the painting Kaveh had mentioned before. Also smiling.

But most importantly, something I see no one talking about: the moment when Alhaitham was explaining why he resigned from being the Grand Sage to being the scribe again and he tells us that “It’s important to keep your priorities straight”, the camera points at Kaveh.

I know this game will probably never have any canon ship because they need to make everyone happy, but we do get hints like this from time to time and I think this was one of them.

After all, why would they bother to add all of those scenes with Kaveh when the quests had already concluded, if not for showing us how is what is Alhaitham’s daily life he wants to protect that much? We saw how happy he is, how eager he was to get home and go have dinner with Kaveh. We also see how Kaveh had been waiting for him as well.

I’d like to know more about their relationship, even if it ends up not being romantic (though how do you explain that face Kaveh made when paimon asked if they are friends).

[casualavocados]

Learn from who? Learn from you? You are still a brat. What do you know? You're only three years older. Like you are any better than me. You're 21, and still a virgin. What are you proud of? I think you can't do it.

KISEKI: DEAR TO ME Ep. 06

[cringetownusa]

noir max noir max noir max noir max my tablet screen stopped working so here's all these and an unfinished sketch page. plus a western au max from the disc (if u see this lmk and i'll @ u)

[sieglinde-freud]

oh im obsessed with this actually… who ever wrote this one i am kissing u on the forehead and hugging you real tight… inigo is such a loverboy im kkkhhhhhhijnsdnfng

[thii-nii]

The Eighth Sense Episode 1

[sonknuxadow]

everyone look what i just saw at walmart immediately