#im so glad to not be the only one
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lead balloon (the tumblr post that saved me)
if this comic resonated with you, it would mean the world to me if you donated to this palestinian family's escape fund.
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no creative notes because this isn't that kind of comic.
I know I don’t owe any of you anything but I still felt compelled to write about my long term absence. And I feel far enough away from the dangerous spot I was in to be able to make this comic. I have a therapist now, and she agreed that making this could be a very cathartic gesture, and the start of properly leaving these thoughts behind me. I am still, at seemingly random times, blindsided by fleeting desires to kill myself. They’re always passing urges, but it’s disarming, and uncomfortable. I worry sometimes that my brain’s spent so long thinking only about suicide that it’s forgotten how to think about anything else. Like, now that I've opened that door for myself, I'll never be able to fully shut it again. But I’m trying my best to encourage my mind in other directions. We'll see how that goes.
I am still donating all proceeds from my store to Palestinian causes. So far, I've donated over $15K, not including donations coming from my own pocket or the fundraising streams which jointly raised around $10K. In the time since I made my initial post about where this money would be going, the focus has shifted from aid organisations to directly donating to escape funds.
If you'd like to do the same, you can look at Operation Olive Branch, which hosts hundreds of Palestinian escape funds or donate to Safebow, which has helped facilitate the safe crossing and securing of important medical procedures for over 150 at-risk palestinians since the beginning of the genocide.
#cw: suicidal ideation#cw: suicide#cw: self harm#cw: mental health#cw: depression#i made the balloon the main representation of my self destructive urges for a reason but im not going to explain it#i tried to keep a lot of the details in this vague#it would be my worst nightmare if this comic encouraged someone to hurt themselves#so. please dont#for a long time even the thought of making this comic felt so insipid and narcissistic#with the state of the world as it is#having the only threat to your life be yourself felt so privileged and trite and shameful#but doing this comic made me sit down and process things in full#and im just. very grateful i didn't give in to my thoughts back when i sincerely felt i'd be more useful to the world dead#i also feel the need to say that this wont represent everyone's battle with mental illness. its unfortunately different for all of us#there is no fix-all#and im afraid this might be one of those comics that either resonates a lot or misses the target by a mile#i made it for myself foremost. and now that its done im glad i did it#thank you for reading#and please stay alive#stillindigo art#stillindigo comics
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companions re-classed part 3 - shadowheart 🌌🌚🌝
*shadowdancer isn't a 5e rogue subclass, it's a 3.5e rogue-based prestige class, but it suits her so well and when i played 3.5e as a kid i thought it was the coolest thing ever lol so i wanted to use it
karlach 🔥 wyll ⚔️
#shadowheart#bg3#my art#*i still think it's the coolest thing ever#ngl tho i hate to speak a word against objectively the best class (rogue) it could use more weird spooky subclasses#rly the only cool supernatural one rn is phantom which i do like a whole lot but it didn't feel like a good fit for her#glad to get this done before succumbing fully to DA brain but idk what the fate of the final three will be lol#next up is lae’zel so im hoping the Do It For Her will motivate me
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You have 90 minutes to complete. (original poem: r.a.)
In participation of the MCYT Recursive Exchange 2024 hosted by @mcytrecursive!
Inspired by know that all my love will be your breath (i will save you when your lights go out)
[text under cut]
1. Have you ever been in love? (Please circle your answer.) a. It's me and him b. Our hearts beat in sync c. Our lives intertwined
2. Do you understand what you’ve done? (Please circle your answer.) a. I couldn't do anything b. I lost my balance c. I doomed us both
3. It's been god knows how long since you felt phantom hands on your neck and there is no one in sight. If you were soul-bound to him and both of you died at the same time then why are you still waiting in the void? Please answer clearly, in full sentences. (Not a correct answer:I just wanted to see him one more time).
4. Define two (2): Fate | The feeling of his forehead against yours Curse | The moment you realise he isn't linked to you anymore
5. True or False: i. It was your fault. ii. You wish you had met him under different circumstances. iii. You can’t regret a single moment that you had him. iv. You would do it all over again if you could. v. It ended long before either of you said anything.
thumbnails:
sketch cover thing for imgur link:
#team ranchers#team rancher#rancher duo#jimmy solidarity#tangotek#trafficshipping#mcyt recursive exchange#events#fic fanart#my art#“canary has butterfly-shaped wings it cant do a dramatic spread like that” watch me. (draws dramatic wings) (sorry)#“you have 90 minutes” have been rattling in my brain for so long ever since i suddenly remembering a web weave using it (yes the beeduo one#very glad i can release it (using it in art) from its confines (my mind)#hm i suppose the title would be more in theme if its abt limited life ranchers#← havnt watched limlife yet#but! happy with what i come up with. lil bit proud even#had so much trouble with the panelling and layers in p2 cause it looks too busy (explodes)#also punching the floor bc i only noticed the “yes-no” pair(?) in the original poem when im already half-done w/ the comic#me when making silly comic makes you do poem analysis#i dont even go there ← does not have enough poetic braincells
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<3
#kazedoodl#my art#happy birthday WOMEN#im only a day late but i had to do this on a plane to do it at all I DID IT FOR U ODILE#odile#isat odile#in stars and time#isat#isat game#odile fanart#isat fanart#in stars and time fanart#i never drew her with a focus on here before so im glad i have now :3 i don't have strong color hcs for her so here's a few diff ones#one of my friends said she just has multiple outfits sdjfgsd#and that works!
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The tac net crash chapter is one of my favorites so far~
Ah and. Guess what. I just discovered that including this post, I made 50 pieces of fanart for Mistakes on mistakes until.. I’m so sane and normal about this story can you tell👍
#maccadam#transformers#fic fanart#momu fanart#jazz#prowl#jazzprowl#considering the speed and the amount of fanart#….yeah I can see why tumblr thought I was a bot lmao#also#I mostly read during night and then drawing from memory during day so uhhhhh the accuracy is questionable haha#mainly I feel like half of the time I don’t know how tf Jazz looks. The guy switching between his looks so often jdjfjfj#IM. SO GLAD THEY RESOLVED THEIR DRAMA EHEHBJGJ#The scene in medbay was so damn cute#oh my goddddd#the scene of the tac net crash#muah#loved it~#you know the thing is - I'm a biiiig fan of mutual feelings and actions#the scene of the kiss was absolutely great but it was a bit one sided#Jazz cared about Prowl but Prowl was far more concerned about information safety and strategy and stuff#but this?? mmmm~ Them caring for each other#Prowl using his last moments of consciousness to ask Jazz if he is mad at him#Prowl actually deeply caring of what Jazz thinks about him now when he knows Prowl killed his friends#i don't know how to explain#kisses are great but this (points) this is my favorite five star meal right here#also there is something so funny about Prowl slowly discovering fow fucked up Jazz is and just accepting it#but being so scared when Jazz discover how fucked up he is. Only for Jazz to be like “boo I knew about your fuckedupness from the start”
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the sirens are turning red
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#fushiguro megumi#megumi fushiguro#jjk art#megumi#animal horror/#animal death/#scopophobia/#hiiii i drew messed up animals again :>#i couldnt decide which ver i liked better between the white and black bg so i decided to playing card logic it#i think if i had to pick i Do like the black bg better but i spent a whole hour on that gd eye im keeping it#idk what came over me but im so glad it did i love drawing characters dressed in white surrounded by concerning animal imagery#gotta b one of my favourite flavours of fanart to make tbh#i saw a picture of a rabbit sculpture and something abt the albino red around the eyes ears feet mouth#made me think of blood pounding made me think of bruises scars Prey#and wld u look at that one of my fav characters ever just so happens 2 have a whole lot of rabbits :)#so i stuck megumi in what i can only describe as a vogue straightjacket n went to town#ik that the megumi + dogs/wolves gets a lot of love bc the characterization fits#but the rabbits.....but the [spoilers]#its SO good its so sososoososos good#anyway im proud of this piece hsfhgsfjs i love drawing rabbits i love white + Bruised blood-under-the-skin red this made me rly happy#i only care a Little bit that it took me forever <-lying#ill blame the rabbit skeleton smh
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Everytime I go into the Zosopp tag, I just see people SCREAMING CRYING SOBBING about the lack of posts IN the Zosopp tag. THE ZOSOPP ECONOMY IS IN SHAMBLES
#one piece#op fanart#zosopp#roronoa zoro#usopp#this was also just an excuse to play dress up with zoro and usopp XD#oh why is usopp wearing a detective outfit???#well im so glad you asked!!!#The gang stopped at this town on an island and there seemed to be some mysterIOUS shenanigans going on#robin and usopp formed a watson and sherlock holmes duo!!! but only usopp dressed for the part LOL#cue usopp getting super into his role and interviewing whoever he can while robin solves the whole mystery with just a few clues#she likes watching usopp have his fun tho wahah so she follows him around and nudges him in the wrong direction for funsies#the ultimate reveal ... usopp: MS BAKER IS THE ONE WHO STOLE THE COOKI- Robin: yeah they're all trading addictive drugs#Ms baker: DRATS and i wuda gotten away with it too if it werent for u two meddling kids!!!#am i talking about usopp and robin on my zosopp post? yeauh#anyways usopp is like wauwah ROBIN!!!!!! UUUU >:((((!!!!!#then he trots off to zoro because he hasnt seen him all day and he wants to tell him about the fun adventure he just had XD
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i want to know everything that makes you happy! 💫🪐🎇
#the caption is aioi lyrics but posting the same thing with the same caption on 3 different socmed is embarasisng. saki save me#project sekai#pjsk#prsk#proseka#saki tenma#leo/need#i have more chibis Soon just theyre for halloween so u have to wait a few days. sniles so wide#AIOI IS SUCH A GOOD SONG AND NOBODY FUCKING TALKS ABOUT IT IDGAF. ITS SO GOOD. START CRYING WITH ME#like obviously the mv is gorgeous and stunning andni love the event and cards but im talking sbout the song. Its so good#So is purpose and nobody talks about it either wtf guys HAPPY PURPOSE TUESDAY!!!!!!#pjsk radio in 6 hours who else is about to#explode MEEE MEEEE I AMMMMM machico save me#nene focus ohantom of Theopera PLEASE PLEAS EPLEASEPLEASE HOW MUST I MANIFEST.#i always mean to draw the songs i want wxs to cover ever since i only did 2 of them Half a fucking year ago but i keep forgetting#and then other groups cover the songs and im like Wlel i cant draw it now .. (i can) (i will still draw emukasa cat food)#mmjs cover is SO GOOD i love mmj all of their covers r so good. wasnt crazy abt their early game ones but All of them for the last 2 years#have been Bonkers. amen. minoshizu duet come back to us please god.#soo glad wxs got reincarnation apple and got all the parts i envisioned for them EMU IMLOVE YOUUUU#ok i gotta go i need to hot glue more fabric onto my cosplay boots before work tomorrow. love and peaches
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birthday family reunion
click for better quality, sketch + closeups under cut
btw the recipe techno used is one nikki gave him ((he messed it up horrendously) they still eat it tho)
#goop soup#dsmp#dsmp fanart#c!tommy#c!tommy fanart#happy birthday to this silly freak#really glad im still makin art for her 4th bday#sad i didnt get to fully render it though#c!techno#c!technoblade#c!philza#c!ranboo#c!tubbo#michael the piglin#michael beloved#michael_beloved#put the wrong watermark on this one IGNORE THAT LOLLLL#((i am so not used to juggling multiple aliases)its only two)#dream smp
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💐 @cordiallyfuturedwight
{© namuspromised}
#kayla you’re my one and only soup snake forever#btsedit#btsgif#dailybts#dailybangtan#userbangtan#usersky#annietrack#userpat#tuserandi#uservans#userzaynab#useremmeline#heyryen#usermaggie#userkelli#*mine#bts#I wanted to use your favourite things here but idk how it ended up like this#I hope you have absolutely the best day and this next year is full of love and music and concerts 💛#I LOVE YOU KAYLA IM SO GLAD I FOUND YOU HERE 💛💛💛#I think I scheduled it to perfect time zone but if now then let’s just pretend#I even included tae! so it’s all your boys together!#some of them are little rough sorry for that#it’s supposed to give moving movie posters vibe#im best friends with clipping masks now#but me and magical wand? we hate each other
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my tablet died and i think my wips are officially lost lmao so here's part of a comic that's prob never gonna get finished. 🥲 tho tbf it's been months since i worked on it so chances were low it'd get done anyways. 😅 my current pfp is from that first montage, but coloured (third image)!
the premise was that the strawhats and the red-haired pirates finally meet. luffy and shanks joyfully reunite and all the strawhats are excited and happily bustling about, touching base with the other emperor's crew--except zoro, who is hanging back and giving shanks the stink eye (second image). eventually shanks notices him and says, very cheerfully, "zoro, hi!" which pisses zoro off further.
usopp or nami ask what's wrong with him and if he's met shanks before, and zoro has the flashback doodle montage in the first image and growls, "yeah, he's my dad's annoying boyfriend." the strawhats are like, "you have a dad???" and then shanks is like, "aw 🥹 did you just call mihawk 'dad'? cute!" and then the strawhats are gaping like, "mihawk is your dad????????" (except for luffy in the back who goes, "shanks has a boyfriend? :D") and the comic ends on zoro angrily blushing and telling everyone to shut up.
anyways, it was something like that. 😂 i hope you at least enjoyed the summary haha.
#mishanks#akataka#roronoa zoro#dracule mihawk#red haired shanks#shanks#akagami no shanks#one piece#one piece fanart#op fanart#in the top middle one shanks is being courteous and helping hide mihawk's blush#cuz he knows hawk doesnt like it when other ppl see him unbalanced (and shanks honestly enjoys keeping it to himself)#i got further along with this comic actually. i'd inked zoro's annoyed face into the bottom and darkened the text for better legibility.#the reason i stalled was cuz the first page accidentally gave ship vibes for other ships besides mishanks and i only wanted the one#so i was tryna figure out how to rejig it to make it obviously gen anywhere that wasnt mishanks.#im glad i at least screencapped this. i was thinking abt screencapping the bi shanks pride piece but the ipad was downstairs so i didnt#and then it died 😞 and now im redrawing it completely#it's coming off differently this time but still. ugh.
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lighthearted.
if this comic resonated with you, please consider donating to this palestinian escape fund (vetted by @/nabulsi and @/el-shab-hussein) as it is less than $7,000 away from it's goal.
i turn 24 today. To celebrate, I made this comic to be a spiritual successor to lead balloon, a comic in which I talked about the darkest period of my life so far.
A lot has changed since my 23rd birthday and this one. My priorities have shifted a lot, in ways that I think are mostly good. But i think the best part about today is that suicide has gone back to being a far away notion. I'm really lucky, and I'm grateful for that.
#yet another largely personal comic that kind of only has real impact to maybe four people#it's crazy what a difference a few months makes#and a trip to the beach that makes you glad you're still alive.#the last page is just me drawing my friends and I as our respective art sonas#credit to my best friend for inventing the designs#i keep copying their shit but its their fault for always having good ideas#ugghhh i love the people in my life so much and im so thankful for them#one of my friends gave me a vintage camera for my birthday#im going to take so many photos i could paper my walls with them#thank you for reading#stillindigo art#stillindigo comics
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konig reminisces with horangi over his short-lived stint as an underground boxer in his teenage years...
more on patreon (plus the nsfw follow-up comic)
bonus:
#so its my headcanon that konig used to fight in a pretty shady underground boxing ring as a teenager#it was his first real opportunity to let some of his feral energy and strength out#he was only there for a year or two before the ring unfairly ousted him#after all its not good for business for one person to stay king for too long#at that point you start hedging your bets#konig got left with nothing by the end of it and he joined up shortly after#and his 'king of the ring' moniker ended up inspiring his operator name later in his life#also yes hello hi horangi#ill be exploring these two together more in the future <3#im glad to be back with my pathetic cat man#korangi#horangi#konig#cod mw2#giragi art
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Jason only resorts to his emergency signal when he's 0.1 seconds away from death and only when he's 100% reaching raw desperation levels of survival
BUT he also uses it when he's faced with the most mild of inconveniences, so the batfam are always stressed when they get his panic signal because is he about to fucking die or was he just locked out of the family Netflix account?
And obviously they can't take ANY chances, so it's always a 50/50 on whether the night ends with the fam huddled in the medbay of the cave, or whether all of them are fully costumed, weapons sharpened and ready to throw hands in Jason's apartment and Jason's just casually lounging on his couch like "Oh hey guys, I'm out of flour, can one of you run to get some?" with the most annoying shit-eating grin you've ever seen.
#imagine being a gothamite and watching each and every one of the batfamily single file entering and exiting a random flat#and batman's just fucking lugging 5 bags of flour like the world's fate is dependent on the delivery of those 5 bags of flour#ofc he only pulls the joke emergency signal when he KNOWS the fam have their own plans at that exact moment.#just to mildy annoy them#tim: i had a DATE and i dropped EVERYTHING to save your ass#and ur tellin me u just wanted someone to hold a flashlight while you repair your SINK??#jason: so what im hearin is that your date is more important than your poor dead brother? i see how it is.#this is just jason's way of spending time with his family because he's too shy to just ask upfront#bruce might seem annoyed but deep down he's always glad jason is doing well and takes it as a sign that Jason just wants to see them#jason todd#red hood#batman#bruce wayne#batfam#batfamily#batkids#batbros#dc#crack#fanatical posting
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North and Simon: (shaking hands on killing Simon potentially)
#detroit become human#north wr400#simon pl600#markus rk200#josh pj500#jericho is just... so funny to me as like. how they function (or dont)#like im v glad that i did a Good Job my first run and no one hated me but i also felt like a very distraught parent#in regards to how markus is just able to either hurt them (by suggestions OF THE OTHERS IN THE GROUP)#or help them because hey what the fuck i just dragged simon to safety and now north wants me to kill him#and then simon like oh no north got shot you should leave her BUT ! i saved her and made simon happy#so its like you know what they have to have some animosity but also respect#i feel like i wanna see more of north and simon being buddies ... and i might have to do that myself#but i also apologize if this is ooc for them because i really did only just play through once and got a not good end#i probably missed a lot of lore and stuff so im v sorry if im Messing Them Up#its currently just me liking their designs and vibes and hoping im not ruining other fans lives by being wrong#and i honestly dont know when north would kill simon but hes on her possible victims list#so since both of their victim lists include themselves for suicide it just reminded me of the meme#with im so mad im gonna (remembers suicide jokes are bad for my mental health)#and it was like yeah watch north be like im gonna (well if i cant kill myself because markus said no suicide) murder someone
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MISFITS AND MAGIC SEASON 2
IT FUCKEN WIMDY
#the only thought i had#and its taken 5 hours since the trailer for me to be like 'yeah fuck it ill post that'#fr so excited#also a 3 year timeskip is sizeable enough that it feels okay if i dont do a full rewatch before the premiere#as much as i love mismag im glad i dont have to study#dimension 20#d20#misfits and magic#mismag#'it fucken wimdy' one of those memes that lives in my head and makes me giggle every time
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