#im scared for many reasons...
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anyway . im scared,,, .
#fic: take care of you and yours#tcoyay#im scared for many reasons...#first we are 80k in and just getting near halfway... this wasnt supposed to be this long#second this is the devastating and worrying part#i also have to write... 8 povs in one chapter :/ half of which ive never written from before#and thats jsut in p1#p2 is going to be The Worst#time to take bets for how long the full intermission is going to be! my guess is like 30k#<- now tht i said that its going ot be longer probably
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I love this silly guy
Sketches i drew from august. I was originally going to fully render one of these sketches but ahhh artblock hit me </3
#sebastian solace#roblox pressure#pressure#sketch dump#art dump#fanart#pressure fanart#mxpaisleysart#im so scared posting this for many reasons aidhqhdha
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@ninjasmudge @nanash1s4n @lambment @bovinaeblogs @dogiperson
doing what i do best . drawing other people’s designs because im not sure what to do with my own !!
all ur designs and styles were very fun to draw/replicate <3
individuals + template under the cut (made by me, credit not required since its so basic lol)
#art#cult of the lamb#cotl#cotl lamb#aaa im kinda scared to post this for some reason#i guess im not used to drawing for so many people at once#my own lamb design isnt final btw#hopefully ill get a ref out for them and nari soon#maybe i should draw peoples narinders next#also sorry if i butchered any of your lambs
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always wondered what STC would've been like if instead of just making Eggman evil on a single event, it kinda jumbled his brain a lot and make him have brief moments of lucidity as Kintobor. give him the ice king treatment ya know
#jo.art#sonic the hedgehog#which would give a reason as to why sonic doesnt just straight up kill eggman#not that he would i think#hes like 15#and would give some sort of drive to keep fighting eggman#in the hopes of maybe 'this time we'll de-jumble' his brain'#plus i dont like the concept of AI holo-kintobor#kintobor should be a sort of dead figure#holo ovi over there takes away from ovi becoming eggy#anyway.#i have so many notes on how id reboot the stc comics#SPECIALLY with SA2 in mind#just as a note#in the last few pannels ovi is looking at his reflection#but like. has no fucking clue whats going on#he doesnt know he turned into eggman and sonic is asking if hes himself? absolutely bananas#but also hes the kinda of dude to try to hold his shit to not scare the kid (sonic) so hes playing like things are kinda under control#what im trying to say is that kintobor is kinda of a dad and is trying to not freak out his son#doesnt work out tho this situation is fucked#and ive given up drawing properly in the last few pannels im sure you can tell#fleetway#sonic the comic
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bh!Eclipse "asked to reach the top shelf" meets "can't reach the lowest cupboards without folding like a paperclip" - @clxckwork-sun-n-moon
Yeah, I mean, there's a reason SI is laughing here after Eclipse "gets on his level" - man's too tall, he'd need to lie down to get close
But shenanigans are so very fun, so:
vs
It's called symbiosis <3
bloodstain fool by naffeclipse and og detective au by sunnys-aesthetic!
#answer let luce#clxckwork sun n moon#dcamv#sleuth jesters#bloodstain fool#my art#wait did i tag that other ask with my art tag. squints#the router idea i had before already so it had to jump in for the top shelf thing#bc YEAH MY ROUTER IS AT THREE METERS HEIGHT IM SCARED OF FALLING THE LADDER IS WOBBLY AND EVEN WITH LADDER I CAN BARELY REACH#IM SHORT YOUR HONOR#but yeah it already happens a lot lmao#i go grocery shopping with someone taller they get grumpy over not finding something but me; eye contact avoider N°1; looks down -#and BAM who wouldve thunk! lower shelves exist!#they *always* say smth like “No wonder I didn't find it/ you found it”#I'm not even mad bc yeah I do be looking down a lot.#eye contact avoidance. bad balance need to watch step. sky too bright. many reasons#okay these tag rambles are getting long lmao#enjoy <3#menace4menace
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#this question is very hard for me to answer so obviously I have to torment everyone else with it#cause like. like I can really see the potential in either answer. both are feasible#I will say. most realistically. to me. edwin first charles harder#because I think…..I think the reasoning behind the other way around usually tends to be about how edwin absolutely was slower to bond and#open up in general whereas charles hit the ground fucking running#but i don’t think that particularly applies to their romantic relationship#if you mean ‘fell for’ in a general sense rather than a romantic one then yes 100%#but that’s not what im talking about here#I have a few different reasons but generally I think edwin fell first because like… the way he attached himself to charles and accepted him#as his person and etc is so unlike him to do with literally anyone- especially at the point where they first met/the first years they knew#each other. charles just seems to have hit him as something very very special and irreplaceable quite quickly for him to open up the way he#did and change and flourish into a fully realized person because of how safe and worthy charles made him feel#he took to charles with an unusual amount of ease and trust and I think that says something about how charles struck his heart Early#whereas with charles… yes on one hand he did stay on the mortal plane largely because of edwin and absolutely would’ve been impacted by the#tender act of mercy that was edwin reading to him as he died so he wouldn’t be scared. that’s absolutely what got him to trust edwin and to#want to be with him and protect him and so on#but charles would still do that and be like that under intense platonic circumstances I think#but most importantly I just think charles fell harder. when he fell is less important to me here- more important is that by GOD that boy is#down so fucking bad and outright SAYS IT in so many ways that he doesn’t realize– the sheer amount he restates how he’s content so long as#he’s with edwin. how he doesn’t want to be anywhere where edwin can’t follow. would and Did go to hell and back for him. believes him#to be the kindest and most incredible person he’s ever met. prioritizes him above anything and everything. etc etc etc#that’s not to say edwin doesn’t feel a similar amount of devotion– but charles just. really loves him with his whole person. loves him as a#fact of his existence and a piece of his very soul#idk man. it just feels like he is so incredibly smitten and he doesn’t even know it.#like I said though I can see both options and give reasons for both options so this question EATS at me I GENUINELY don’t have a super#strong feeling either is absolutely correct. it’s so difficult to answer they’re both so smitten and have such a history and GRAHHHH#payneland#dead boy detectives#rambling#polls
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i don’t talk about bridgerton on here but just to clarify. i will not be having ANY eloise hate on this account. i will bite.
#eloise bridgerton they could never make me hate you!!#addressing the normal talking points one by one to get them sorted:#- no i don’t care that eloise called pen some names after the discovery. she was devastated and furious.#she can apologise in the future but in the moment of course she said it#- yes pen did write about eloise as a way to save her but that doesn’t mean it hasn’t possibly ruined eloise’s life#- similarly: eloise isn’t (just) angry that she was written about. daphne also went through whistledown and it very much terrified her#so have many other women including marina#- eloise is betrayed because she told pen everything and is realising pen told her nothing#(and she’s probably thinking about any secrets she might have said to her best friend that could now be used against the ton and her family)#- as claudio said: being regency gossip girl isnt a moral girlboss thing its deeply harmful tbh#- pen did have reasons to become whistledown! that doesn’t mean that she’s innocent or right!#- eloise isnt now friends with cressida to spite pen lmao she’s alone and scared and cressida was the last person who offered her friendship#she has no idea how to manage society by herself#(and she needs someone to improve the reputation of her and her family)#- im also convinced she has other ulterior motives for befriending cressida. like she’s keeping an eye on her or smth#- eloise didn’t just ignore anything pen said and that’s why she only just figured it out. pen deliberately didn’t speak like lw to hide it#the moment she did eloise was like huh that’s weird she doesn’t normally talk like that. and THATS when she figured it out#- eloise just found out her best friend has betrayed her and been hiding this massive secret#but she hasn’t told anyone. not even her own family. im not hearing out any accusations of HER of being disloyal#- also pen clearly wasn’t that upset at writing about eloise bc the moment eloise and colin upset her she went straight back to it lmao#side note but no i don’t think the queen is going to name her the ‘emerald’ or anything because she’s suddenly in the spotlight#eloise is tbh the only debutante she actually consistently recognised (for good or bad)#a new dress is not going to be interesting for charlotte to change her whole tradition#tl;dr i love eloise and i will die on this hill#eloise bridgerton#bridgerton
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sorry for disappearing from tumblr for 3 months without saying anything but im back now :> hiiiiiii :> ill ramble a bit abt why i was gone in the tags. anyway yay hi guys :> good evening :> hows everyone doing :>
#i really do feel bad... i was originally just taking a few days off to catch up on assignments#but i got convinced the internet was poisoning my brain m i got super scared of coming back online for some reason i couldnt really identif#then i realized it was one of my classic attempts to self isolate to solve all my problems when all it actually was is self sabatoge.#many such cases!#so much has happened but also literally nothing has happened at all. crazy#youd think all that time not on tumblr would have made me more productive but it didnt. i just napped and wallowed.#i wish i could come back with more art or something but i lowkey got nothing. but im working on several things yay!! look forward to it#on the bright side i think i recognize the impulse a bit better now and im trying to stop shutting myself off from any kind of community#u know how it is when its almost ur birthday and u realize that time keeps passing and if u keep living the way u are -#- ur never going to be happy? yeah.#so im probly going to be a bit chattier online or at least try to be. im trying to live my life less afraid of everything in many ways#angel.txt
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trying to psych myself up to finally do oc refs by doing fandom-related refs instead: volume 1
wanted to update my yuma from whatever tf this au is so he was a bit more unique... takes inspo from a lot of different things while also trying to be its own sorta thing? which is fitting given the au ;)
bonus chibi now that i'm also figuring out how tf to do chibis lol:
#my art lol#synth v yuma#yuma synthv#synth v#synthv fanart#synthesizer v#vocaloid#vocaloid fanart#YES I KNOW ITS DIFFERENT but at this rate its the umbrella tag. all vsynth shit goes under there just like on main 😔#sorry for the annoyign watermarks i just dont want this to get stolennn/traced it'll b my joker arc. is2g#like thats never happened to me before as far as i know but now that my art is getting 'better' i begin to get scared that it will happen#if my fanart got stolen i'd def sting a little yeah but not hurt AS bad as if someone stole my original shit. THAT would hurt#one of many reasons why i post less personal oc stuffs. although as mentioned above i AM in an oc mood so i wanna draw em maybe...#and stuff like this is a step to develop a PROPER FUCKING REF STYLE bc i SUCKKKK AT MAKING REFS LOL 😭 BUT I SHOULD GIT GUD#i have a few other refs planned for vocaloid au (i guess???) related shit but they're not done yet. this one was also a wip that i just??#impulsively decided to redo & finish bc i wanted to draw but nothing else i was trying to draw came out right. advantages of many wips#i have SOOO many things i could say abt some of the things that went into this redesign but i dont wanna come off as pretentious 😔💔#obviously it was primarily inspired by the vimalion yuma design but. there's moreeee that i can't explain here bc tag limits and im shy#i do think i want to try and be more intentional with my character designs now so i'm seeing how that goes as i redesign some old ocs#man though this kind of stuff makes me remember i used to LOVEE doing this stuff. and now its even crazierr given art improvement#uaurhghh my head is buzzing w/. so many thoughts. THIS ALWAYS FUCKING HAPPENS I GET SO MANY IDEAS WHEN IM BUSY GFD#this is actually from today though unlike some other things i might eventually post. that'll make more sense soon#and fuckkk i forgot the chain necklace thing on the chibi yeah but i couldnt get it to look good. whatever
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Guys I wanna post my art on tiktok but everytime I think about doing it I keep getting scared I'll get bullied 😭😭😭 the art tiktok community is so toxic
#i want to bc its where a lot of fans of fandoms i like are there but#im scared somebody is gonna tease my art or cause drama for no reason#theyre literally ruthless ive seen so many good artists quit thanks to tiktok#😭😭😭😭#i remember somebody posted my art on there and someone made fun of the hands#i wanted to die
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Me: the MCs for otome games need to be more varied! Not everyone is a brown eyed brunette white girl with bangs!
Also me: *is in fact a brown eyed brunette white girl with bangs*
#it's actually part of the reason im hesitant to show my mc/self inserts#because im scared someone will complain that they look all the same and 'basic'#even though thats just what i look like#but ive seen so many people comment stuff like that under art or fanfic#anyway#im not sure what to tag this#it can apply to a lot of games#arcana twilight#twisted wonderland#ayakashi romance reborn#a villain's twisted heart#blood in roses#blood moon calling#obey me!#my post
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The utter lack of bowuigi interaction (and really just luigi screentime in general) in the movie is genuinely disappointing because when i saw what a scared little guy luigi was i was fully expecting there to be an arc while hes captured where having to be around bowser and do what he says gradually teaches him to be less scared and stand up for himself all leading up to when he saves mario at the end
Like that ending wouldve been so much more impactful with a just a little more luigi screentime
#IM SO SAD AT THE LACK OF LUIGI#The trailer was like- their one interaction in the whole movie what a let down#And not even for the loss of ship content but also the loss of narrative potential#There were so many moments already in the movie that felt like they were meant for luigi to be a part of#Like the piano scene with kamek- why not use luigi instead?????#And the proposal practice also with kamek???? Cmonnnnnnnnnn its so perfecttttt#For obvious ship reasons#But also it wouldve allow us to see luigi slowly become less and less scared#Him learning to stand up for himself#Like im honestly really surprised they didnt go that route#With how the movie started i really thought thats where they were going#Maybe they wanted to but something changed?#Idk man feels like a mistake#Mario movie#the super mario bros movie#mario movie spoilers#the super mario bros movie spoilers#bowuigi
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I JUST REWATCHED PIWON MOVIE AND I HAVE THINGS TO SAY
#okay first of all THEY DEBUTED WITH A MOVIE !!!! that's so crazy every time i think about it im like woooow#jongseob and intak acting debut when ???? they were sooo good omg unlike kyo i didn't remember how bad he was 😭😭 but his#character is hilarious so it's fine <3 ALSO i completely forgot yoo jaesuk and jung haein are in it like guysss what are u doing here hihi#anyways absolutely oscar worthy real cinema if u ask me#now after taking notes and watching the new trailer a few times i think that p1epi is actually chaeyoons weird talking plushie#but since it's away from her it can't talk so that's why jongseob create that thingy to translate from#dog language to human language and i think it's there because maybe the members got like lost in time and#it wants to remind them that they have to save the entire world from the apocalypse#also p1epi came down from the sky just like the alcot meteor like ummm yes we love symbolism 🙂↕️#i saw someone saying the dog it's actually intak because the dog came through the window and intak wakes up next to one but it doesn't make#any sense to me so we're throwing that idea in the trash can#talking about intak hes now has blue eyes so that means he got infected but honestly when did that happen while he was fighting#some zombie? idk i think i have to watch all their mvs again for clues but what that means he's one of the bad guy now??#also i may be insane but what if the shop represents the world and seeing it in flames means the members couldn't save it and their lore#ends with the saddest ending ever like yeah sorry the apocalypse won#OR WHAT IF !!!!! they aren't the ones who can save the world they actually are the reason why it's ending like the masked ghost#actually created them to spread the virus and that would also explain them at the end of the trailer looking#at the burning shop without doing anything like they ARE alcot the meteor thats gonna destroy the world#but that would be too dark i know they're the heroes so it will have a happy ending#i have many theories but im starting to scare myself so ill shut up#pt
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i keep thinking about how scared i am about starting college and im trying to hammer in "do it scared" with the like. 3 weeks i have before it starts
#somehow “dont trust how you feel about your life after 9 pm” was able to become something that immediately shuts down my anxiety#but “do it scared” hasnt quite sunk in yet#i keep thinking about how id have to drive by myself and go somewhere unfamiliar and start something new and IM SCARED!!!!!#i guess i have to remind myself that i survived the first days of middle school and high school even though they were new experiences#i know how to get to my college. its in a town close by that ive driven to many times#i also only have ONE CLASS. on my first day. i only have to be there for 2 hours max and i can go home#not to mention a first day is never anything scary. its usually just an introduction to the class#ughhhhhhhh i gotta logic my way out of anxiety#perfect logic and reasoning vs inherently illogical feeling that makes me feel like im gonna die if i do anything new who would win
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꒰୨୧꒱
#the thing is that even if i always long for a relastionship...#i've never even been in one and idk how they work & im so scared of many things#i have sm troubles and issues with touch. i've gotten to a place where i cant even stand my own sisters or mom bumping into me#and outside i cant stand when someone accidentally walks into me or touching someone's legs on the bus#i hate it. it's not only feeling uncomfortable i feel distressed and scared and sick#smth that seems very normal in like all couples is that youre 'allowed' to touch eo all thge time whenever#that scares me a lot. like touch is so scary for me. and when youre in a relationship theres just this silent agreement that you can touch#eo all the time and thats like... how it's supposed to be.... ://#thats so scary to me. that theres this expectation and demand that if im someones gf they should be allowed to touch me whnever#and like i've never been in love and been in a relationship and been touched by that person so idk#maybe it wouldnt be an issue. but just thinking that.. i dont belong completely to myself and therefore give up#the right to not be touched if and when i feel distressed or uneasy is too scary for me#maybe i could learn to feel safe with them and want their touch but rn it scares me skskks#what if they kiss me when im feeling extremely sex reoulsed and wanna kill myself bc of my inner agony#and they get hurt when i try to pull away?#bc regardless of what ppl say... it is a truth that in a relationship youre exoected to want physical touch at all times#and it is seen as an insult to your partner if there are other forces within u (like trauma etc) that makes u sometimes uncomfortable w it#but yeah idk... the problem is that... in humanity and society#consent is one of the least important and prioritized things. as a humanbeing living u will have your consent disregarded countless times#and for me personally consent is one of the most important things. & thats one of the reasons why its so hard for me to live in this society#like yes i do want to have a partner and touch and be touched#but what if we're in the store and im feeling particularly bad that day and feel like#i need to turn myself inside out and peel my skin off and feel anxious and scared#and they just casually grab my ass?? then i will go home and kill myself :) or have a breakdown in the store lol#i dont want to go thru this but i also dont wanna put someone else thru it#and like it would be different if they asked first if i was ok being touched and i said yes#and if i said no theyd respect me and not get hurt#but like be for real.... almost nobody does that. and almost everyone thinks thats lame#in most relationships nobody asks eo. youre expected to just always be ok with it. if u want to be asked youre silly and demanding#nobody asks their partner abt that. that just dont happen lmao. so idk. :((( i wish i was normal
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people shitting all over a movie bc it doesn't live up to the "scariest movie you'll ever see" hype is SOOOO stupid. like hello ever horror movie EVER uses that line as part of their marketing. you absolutely cannot put THAT much stake into that. be so serious.
#you can say you dont like a movie but do fucking not jump straight to the overhyped bullshit#come the fuck on#also there are different kinds of scary movies#like theres your classic jumpscare kind of scary and then theres your deeply unsettling kind of scary#and i think a LOOOOOT of people assume 'scariest movie of all time' means the jumpscare kind#when in fact that disturbing under your skin kind of creepy can be scarier!! (and is in fact the specific type of scary meant in this case!)#n e ways.#sorry im just really annoyed at just how many people ive seen taking biiig steamy dumps all over A Recent Movie for this exact reason#bc its bullshit#just bc something wasnt what you expected it to be doesnt mean it was overhyped#just bc it didnt scare you in the way you thought it was supposed to does not mean it is overhyped!#mack rambles
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