#im not in a very good place rip
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"Matthew before we start, I wanna talk to you about your mouthguard. What's the purpose of it? What purpose does it serve 'cuz it's never in your mouth?" "I mean, I guess it doesn't really serve that much of a purpose all the time? I try to keep it in as best I can but its got a mind of its own, and it's everywhere so... I don't know. I think in the important times I have it in? But it's not all the time." "Does that bother anyone? Teammates? Opposition? Probably your mum? Does she say anything?" "Yeah, my mom did not like it at the start but she's completely given up on it. Call it about 8 years ago, 9 years ago, when I came into the NHL she gave up on it so. I don't know! Teammates don't really care. Opposition? I've had it grabbed a few times but it's all good." "It's workin' for ya."
florida panthers @ edmonton oilers | 12.16.24 (x)
#matthew tkachuk#florida panthers#2425#crying at how deadpan the prime reporter is THATS WHAT HEIGHTENS THE DELIVERY OF “what purpose does it serve”#maffhew laughing about it too#man who must always be questioned about his mouthguard habits#“i try to keep it in as best i can but its got a mind of its own and its everywhere so”#why do you talk about it like its a tail 😭😭😭#what a little puppy tail that cant help but wag is that what this is do we express our mood through the wagging mouthguard stim#when youre so happy and you are unfortunately human and dont have a tail to wag but the wiggles consume you so you wag your foot instead#mouth guard edition?#PLEASE CHANTAL GAVE UP ON HIM SHE FOUGHT THE GOOD FIGHT AND LOST PRAYING FOR HER FR#“but its all good” he says like a saint outstretching his arms out in forgiveness#as if he didnt provoke everyone in ripping it out in the first place#he has talked about how there were other instances where someone has ripped it out after the kreids ecf incident but he never dropped names#and he brought it up again AND STILL HASNT DROPPED NAMES#IM NOSY A VERY LET ME SEEEEE I WANNA KNOWWWWW TELL MEEEEEEEE
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sissi i totally agree with you about the current state of romantasy books! i love a classic fantasy book, where romance is much more of a subplot. but sometimes i'm really craving a romance forward fantasy, but actually finding a good one nowadays is abysmal. i know it's partially a personal taste thing, but there is so much insta-love/attraction in romantasy books and i'm like where is the yearning! where is the pining! there's no build up of tension and it's such a bummer. and then also the plot is usually completely thrown out the window to focus on the romance. which i get romantasy is meant to be romance heavy, but i would like a little plot please 😭
no, honestly!! there is literally NO plot, it's just romance in a fantasy setting. except even romance books should have a plot, so it's just vibes and vague worldbuilding with some magical elements. that's it. everyone is super hot and extra badass and they're the most in love to ever be in love. YAWN
and it's a fucking shame because on paper, I should love romantasy. I like fantasy books, and I like it when they're romance-heavy (not the main or sole focus, but I don't mind if it's a large part of it) but the romance should be GOOD! ugh it makes me so mad/sad because I wanna like romantasy so bad!! I just can't 😔
(side note: if you have any romantasy books that are good, please let me know!! I'll gladly take some recs from anyone <3)
#replies#bikananjarrus#is this a safe place to admit that i blame ac*tar....#like it's very clear that 95% of these books are just ac*tar rip-offs now#except even ac*tar wasn't that good (to me) and these dollar store versions are even worse#at least ac*tar had some soul to it but the copycats are all completely dead and soulless and unimaginative#with the billionth tortured rh*sand-like male love interest and the billionth special snowflake not like other girls f*yre-like female lead#im tiredddddddddd#save me good romantasy save me
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he didn't want to be a half-blood..
#dont mind me just venting some feelings into art#im not in a very good place rip#percy jackson#pjo#vent art#this isnt supposed to be walker percy btw#ive always imagined him with curly hair#hes latino in my head#also if you have angsty pjo/hoo fic recs feel free to send those to me
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i don't think i can be normal about Sunday guys
#hsr#hsr spoilers#i haven't even FINISHED it yet but his ideology is so warped. i cheered when i thought Gallagher had killed him for real#im not upset he's alive though i do think it's a bit of a cop-out . but. ouhghhhh something is so wrong with his mind (/positive.)#it's successfully looped back around to loving his character though. when there's a fucked up guy in a story i either#1) get very hostile towards them because i feel like they aren't being portrayed enough like the villain i see them as#or 2) become Obsessed with them forever because they are just so fucking . Wrong. like .#ayato genshin impact falls into both of these categories simultaneously like a fucking electron.#but sunday. he has wholeheartedly landed himself in the second category. i need to dissect him and maybe like. idk. give him a cake (?)??#Come Experience The Joys. Idiot. and also maybe listen to your sister.#honestly i REALLY like robin i think she's super super great and has good ideas#i really really love the like. the.#the contrast between his like. his horrible pessimistic nihilistic ideology. and robins optimistic harmonious one.#like robin seems to kind of... not be able to understand that sometimes nihilism is the only way to survive and that it's a balance#survival is good but hard to break out of... you need to survive enough to be ABLE to live. she seems to idealize living in opposition to it#whereas sunday is like. there are people who can ONLY survive. sometimes living isn't an option because the world is cruel and we don't all#get that choice. sometimes surviving is all you can do. why not embrace that? why not build a place where people can postpone death?#if fulfillment isn't possible... then why not accept placation even if it is a poison to the soul? surely joyful prison is better than death#if all that awaits in the world is suffering then why not let the bird live the rest of its days in its cage... even if it is unfulfilling?#HE'S SO . RHGHHGHGHFHGHHVGJF#he feels like he's on the brink of a misanthropic suicidal breakdown to me. someone fucking help him (but not really)#(i don't think anyone should be subjected to his brain. but i would like to see him get better. actually i think robin is trying for sure)#anyway. very curious how this quest is going to end. i want to rip him limb from limb and then stitch him back together again after#my posts
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Happy New Year!!
I'd love to hear one thing from 2024 that you're happy about, proud of, or something in general that was good that made your year a little better!
Do you have anything you're looking forward to in 2025? Do you have any goals you'd like to achieve this year, or any plans you're looking forward to?
Feel free to tag or comment, or send me an ask and I'll reply to it!!
υ˶˃ ﻌ ˂˶υ
#puppy rambles#ask puppy#wishing everyone a very safe from fascist dictators 2025#im excited to go to my friends wedding!#im good friends with both the bride and groom im so happy for them#I'm also excited to garden this year#and we're planning a handful of small projects for our new place to make it a bit nicer and more home-y#it mostly just needs better/more thought out storage#first up is our bathroom/closet!#we're painting and redoing the shelving in there to store twice as much bc it's real small rip#and we're gonna paint the walls and cabinets and put new hardware in#and bc of menards (our beloved) the whole project including some purely cosmetic things will only be like $250 for EVERYTHING
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i’m so cool and strong!!!!!!
#i painted a wall today by myself!!!!! i was feeling very high spoons and capable partly bc i rly wanted it done#ive never done any house painting before!!!!!! all told it took 12 hours#including 2 hours for masking the edges#i learned halfway through that having a cutting brush makes. everything so much. easier. so i know that now#it’s for our living room in the place we are moving into asap#and it looks. so good!!!! got dark teal feature wall. mainly blue other walls. then a white one (as of today)#just makes things feel so much brighter and more open!!!!#we are probably going to have to rip up the carpet which will be fun but. very difficult#anyway im going to be in so much pain tomorrow. 12 hours was too long for me to work (has ehlers danlos)#but i Did It and now the task is done and i feel. accomplished#not magnus content
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how was playing hsr? was there anything that you liked in the game and the story?
ITS BEEN AMAZING AS EXPECTED!!!!!!!!! i actually havent played genshin in a while since starting it, i have no motivation to do the filler event while a perfectly good star rail is sitting there waiting to be played :')
but for mechanics, i love they have auto battle so you dont have to nessecarily sit there and invest in every little battle you gotta do....and i love that the resin (resin??) system is a lot more forgiving with a higher cap, lower cost, and allow for overflow...thats nice...i also love that the mc and starter units are very useful. im so emotionally attatched to the star rail crew so im glad they never have to leave my team !!!!
storywise im LOVING IT SO FAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i started playing it at the beginning of spring break 2 weeks ago and im almost all caught up!!! i went through belabog and penacony and now im just doing those leftover intermission main quests which im only now realizing i shouldve done before going to penacony LMAO
and of course.....danmarch....im so soft for them......and also i love sampo i cant wait to see what they do with him
#besides the star rail crew and sampo im not too attatched to anyone else#im very much a (what would happen in canon) type of player so the only units i REALLY want are himeko welt and imbibitor lunae#(and sampo)#everyone else i can go without#so this game is probably gonna be a lot better for my wallet#overall it just like it better than genshin minus the open world part#i like the story and characters...i like that you can play as bad guys while theyre still bad guys???? like blade and kafka???#cuz in genshin you always gotta redeem them somehow first before theyre playable#not here hueheuhe#also i love that they actually kill off playable characters#(spoilers from here on out)#i know were supposed to be all sad for fireflys death but honestly.......i didnt care about her too much LMAO#i was actually a little annoyed for the secret base part because her base was SO FUCKING DEEP IN ENEMY TERRITORY#i was like (damn bitch how far away is this shit??!)#that by the time we got to the emotional part i was just mad#i never liked characters where the game tries to like....force you to care about them#and its implied you have some super close relationship ESPECIALLY when you havent known them long#now if march died that would be a whole different story#but firefly??? i mean rip but i didnt really know her#im loving the penacony quest so far though#any setting where its like a place of mind tricks and gambling and spending money and sin is always so scary to me#especially the dream within a dream within a dream shit#the mind fuck aspect is always a good plot that i enjoy#i also love that theyre not afraid to upgrade units#like we have dan heng and the dragon dan heng#so characters arnt stagnent forever#everyday i hope we one day get to see a 5-star secret power march#cuz that girl has some shit going on i swear#i just did her luofu memory quest#and those fuckers in the garden of recollection............
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why did dio even do all that
#iwas trying to give my mom the gist of pt1 earlier and i was like uh. i dont actually know why he did what he did#like the killing dario thing absolutely i get. but then he went to the joestars and is just like? an asshole for no reason#Like why did he do that shit. he was clearly very good at decieving people & he literally went to school to be a lawyer#surely if he wanted money or power-- which i think was his goal(?)-- he couldve just lied to the joestars and played nice the whole time#& then when old man george kicks the bucket he gets half the inheritence. even if he was gonna poison mr joestar#if he was really nice to everyone else? i think he wouldve gotten away with it. come ON dio!!!!#its not even like hes a bad liar or anything. hes a very good actor he couldve 100% pulled this off. he couldve gotten the mask too like!!!#if you wanted political power just wait for mr joestar to die (or speed up the process) & you inherit that.#hes a wealthy man in victorian england. like thats already pretty damn good#and if he played nice he couldve taken that damn mask and nobody wouldve batted an eye. like he could easily get the vampire power too#IDK. if i was in his place i would simply not do all that. rip to dio but im different#muffin mumbles#jjba
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hello! it has been a long time since i've talked through my day! this one had such a big turnaround that i needed to document it, mostly for myself.
i had an appointment with a 'root canal specialist' today bc i had my first app with my new dentist a couple of weeks ago and his xray revealed an abscess wow how fun :) i couldn't feel it bc that tooth has a decade old root canal so there are no nerves to reveal there is anything going on!! fun!!!! he's a super nice dentist, i like him but he made me very panicked lol he was showing me how close it is to my sinuses on the xray. so he was like 'go see this guy asap' bc he wanted to know whether there was a chance my old root canal could be redone or if i'd have to get the whole tooth removed/an implant, all for the low low price of $5-6000 🙃 but obviously you can never see specialists asap!!! so i've been walking around for 2.5 weeks with dread/phantom pains that by the time i saw him the infection would've spread and idk had catastrophic consequences??? and then today when i went there was CONSTRUCTION at the turn i needed to make and the road was closed and i was like i don't know how to get there from another street??!?!?!??! i spent 10 minutes driving through suburban streets and my navigation kept trying to take me back to the original route with the closed road, and its the middle of town so there was nowhere i could just temporarily stop and look at the map, and i called them almost crying to let them know i'm coming but i might be late bc i just can't navigate these streets jegjkdgkjdkg
anyway i MADE it, i think i parked in another business's parking lot and just hoped they didn't care lol and then the lady at the desk was like 'our other specialist will have to see you bc the guy you're here for isn't here' so i was feeling uhhhh not good after my dentist talked him up so much. AND my dentist didn't send over my electronic referral and i had LITERALLY been stressed that he would forget to do exactly that for the whole 2.5 weeks oh my god, thankfully they didnt even seem to care. but then as i was filling out the paperwork in the waiting room 'no judgment' came on, and then 'wolves' right after??? and i was like this seems deliberate to try and calm me down 😂 and when the substitute specialist called me in he was so extremely calming and talked me through my options, one of which is indeed to try and redo the root canal bc he's confident he can, it would still cost a lot but wayyyyy less. he also said i could 'do nothing' (which is obv risky, and i would never do nothing, but that made me realise my infection is not about to bust through and spread across my sinuses any second, one fear down!). he was just softly spoken and super relaxed and he made me feel like this was not in fact a crisis and said i could go and think about what i wanted to do, and just call for an appointment when i decided. and then when i went out to pay 'i want to write you a song' was playing 😭 i asked the receptionists if there was a 1d fan in the house and one of them said it must just be a random playlist on spotify, so this was all a complete coincidence????? i told them i was enjoying it very much.
anyway long story short i had already taken the rest of the afternoon off work to go work in the garden, but figured there was a good chance i'd be so down about an unexpected and immiment $5000 hit that i wouldn't want to do anything, but i drove home feeling extremely reassured that i had options and i was not on the clock to decide, and also very relaxed by 1d playing in the background the entire time. i have also been extremely stressed that i would need to take the next step asap and this would be such a bad time as mum is working 50 hour weeks right now bc of the referendum, so i am on caring duty with nonna/nonno anytime we don't have carers here. but there's time! i had a v good afternoon in the garden after all!
#i am extremely comfortable at the dentist (i had the kindest dentist all through childhood/adolescence/early adulthood)#(who put lots of time into making us comfortable/safe in his chair when we were tiny)#but i have a lot of dental fear bc you only get one go#(i have v regular dreams of my teeth falling out lol)#i also have v weak teeth rip my mouth is a filling factory#i do eat a lot of sugar lol but my teeth clearly suffer more than other ppl i know who eat just as much#anyways the point is everything was monumentally stressful/scary until i stepped inside that place#im very thankful with how the entire appointment played out#for the substitute specialist and also for the soothing tunes lol#im not sure what i will do yet but i will think about it. bc i can!#i am crediting god for this one 😂 he took good care of me today#tp
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Also while Jack and religion posting these lyrics from Belle's Palsy by Reverend Glasseye just felt so him.
#luly talks#dsaf#dsaf jack#jack kennedy#him in the good ending to be fucking honest. ykwifm.#sorry im dropping so many fucks maybe that afterlife post i made was foreshadowing for how mad im gonna be when im send to hazbin hotel#sorry it was a long day today. im very tired. it was rough.#anyway I've become less of a man is so . him. bc if the title of the song doesn't tell you enough GO LISTEN TO IT 🫵👁️👁️ but also like#it's about a man falling apart bc illness like he's dying and talking to his god#and expressing how eager he is to meet his end#and by 3 jack really is so fucking done with being alive he's so tired AND. sorry. sorry this is no place for.me.to rip my hair off#he makes me just so sad it's unreal. I'd fix him. anyway um. like yeah#yeah he's all fucking rotten and tired and just wants to finally fucking die#also i like that the song talks of storm bc he does go up in flames so it's like. a silly contrast y'know :)
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hehehe got tickets to jodie whittaker play the day after gallifrey cabaret in october..... life could be dream
#planning far too many london trips for someone who no longer has a place to crash in london rip#very much in a spend money now worry about it later mindset atm which is not good#but hey im Young and Free and need to live life to the fullest. by going to see jodie whittaker in the duchess of malfi.
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As you can see, this race is off to a good start
#nah bcs why did trulli and sutil fighting compell me#idk kinda obsessed with it#like the way jarno is shorter than adrian and keeps coming at him#and adrian keeps trying to placate him and apologize by grabbing his arm#i will gif it :D i like it and idk why#but my god the pitlane incident#its funny cause i actually do really like the pre-2010 fuel strat even tho it feels a bit dangerous#they def made is safer since Jos' accident#but then moments like these remind me of why it doesnt exist anymore#to clarify:#Kovalinen was trying to get out ahead of Kimi and thus accidentally ripped out the fuel hose#thus spraying a bunch of fuel at kimi's car and into the cockpit among other places#and kimis exhaust made the fuel momentarily burst into flames#and i find the fuel strat way more interesting than modern tire strar#but i saw that and im like ah yes perhaps a good thing that it doesnt exist anymore#bur bro that first lap was absolutely insane like just so much shit going on#incident btwn kovalainen and fisi that im still not sure about. and during that i think heikki hit Seb a bit#and then the crash btwn sutil and trulli was very crazy like the way sutil's car slid across the track#and not only it slide across the track but he also accidentally ended up taking out Nano as well 😭😭#and the the girls were fighting(compelling)#and then the fuel hose incident#OH WAIT YEAH and also kimi's wing got clipped by mark#so much going on. so i hope the rest of the race isnt too boring in comparison#catie.rambling.txt
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Oh my god, I was like, hey lets read that silly webcomics with the funny penis anatomy and then I ended up sinking it like 3 hrs and its 4am
#its not even a necessarily good comic 💀💀💀#the author is drawing the comic like storyboards#theres so much dialogue i just skip and i end up getting by just by flying thru#this was like homestuck all over again#and so much sex and transhuman and trans allegories#very cool concepts just the execution is all over the place#now im at the point where they keep doing flashbacks and hwuh the sexy rabbit lady is the og cyclops rabbit#i came for the funny penis but admittedly the sex was good bc god#something about the pseudo cannibalism becoming one is so fucking hot#its feast for a king#ieueegagshfhguvig#i havent stayed up this late in a long time#i usually fucking hate gore and intestines but since thsyre always described as tentacles and worms#i was able to avoid a lot of that disgust#they fuck nasty man!! almost all the characters try to fuck nasty#except for the cool marshmallow junji ito dude who literally ripped his face off bc he did NOT want to particpate in sex#the plot is kinda like doom eternal where humanity fucked up trying to get energy#but instead of mars its the moon and oh they fucked up earth too#.txt
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i have a headache but also i dont want to go to sleep just yet dkjnfjds i want me-time
(warning: as i was writing the tags of this post this turned into another kinda-heavy rant about the situation my group of friends and i are. so keep that in mind)
#things were weird today when She(tm) was there but when she left things were normal again#but these hours were kinda stressful rip or more like... there was an inherent discomfort and tension in the air#with some ugly commentaries and actions on her part. like its your (supposed) best friend's birthday at least try to hide your disgust 👍#birthday you ~apparently~ forgot until it the day before. also you didnt had a single penny to spend on the gift for him#but you sure as hell had it to go eat with your college friends to expensive places! girl at least dont post about it on insta#and just in case; this wasnt a '*goes to expensive places before* -oh i dont have money sowwy :(('#this was a '-oh i dont have money sowwy :(( *goes to expensive places after it*'#what we were asking for collaboration was way less than what she spent on those places. it was AT THE VERY LEAST 3000 ars per food#and you know what she wanted to give for the gift? 500 ars!!! you cant buy shit with it; let alone if we only collaborated with 500 each#like she wanted. we're 4; genuine question what kinda shit can you buy for $2000. maybe a good quality cup but we already gave him that#but even then the point is not the money; the thing is the attitude. you cant spend more than $500 on us#but you can spend at least $6000 on your other friends; given you went to eat with them two days in a row. priorities i guess?#OH! and talking about it!! can you fucking believe she INVESTIGATED the phone of our ~new~ friend (the one shes jealous of)#and DEADASS said 'oh i see. my mom has an A51'. our friend has an A20 if im not wrong; which might not be an A51 but its. still expensive??#also your mom has an A51 but you have an iPhone 5 since you were on high school. but hey; apple i am right?? inherently better than an A20#sorry i have less than that; i have an A10s (that i got on the start of 2020). can i still breathe the same air as you and your mom /s#once again the problem is not the money or the phone or WHATEVER. its the fucking attitude shes having. you want to pretend you have money#and act like youre superior to people who 'dont'; when in reality YOU ARE MIDDLE CLASS. YOU ARENT UPPER CLASS; NOT EVEN UPPER-MIDDLE CLASS#YOURE MIDDLE CLASS. MIDDLE CLASS LIKE THE REST OF US; NOT LIKE YOUR COLLEGE FRIENDS YOU LOVE SO MUCH AND WANT TO IMPRESS#YOU SPEND MONEY YOU DEFINITELY DONT HAVE BECAUSE YOU WANT TO APPEAR UPPER-MIDDLE AT THE VERY LEAST. but thats a lie#a lie that if these beloved friends bothered to ACTUALLY know even the slightest about you; like we do; would fall apart. but they wouldnt!#because they dont care about you as much as we care(d). do you think they will tolerate this fucking attitude youre having towards us?#no they wouldnt. trust me; they WOULDNT. they will tell you to fuck off and leave you completely alone. go cry a river.#god fucking dammit why are you like this. WHY you turned like this. or rather; why we were SO GODDAMN blind we didnt noticed this before#negative
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me when i try and ignore a hyperfixation i’ve had for 2.5 years … and it doesnt work!!!!! who could’ve expected that ………….
#dies. also VENTING AHEAD sorry i ended up venting in tags. SO YEA VENTING TW BE WARNED!!!#yk what i’ll say it. its the#fucking d s m p#im spelling it that way so hopefully this wont show up in the tag. if it does sorry to ppl who got here from it#but.#i WANT to be over it i want to not like it anhmore#bc it does not help my moral ocd one fucking bit#why does it not help my moral ocd u may ask?#bc it is very controversial and has many ppl in it that are legitimately bad ppl and *points at ppl saying if u like d s m p youre a bad pe#and like . That doesnt help my moral ocd (which is obsessed with being a good person at all times and if im not then i am evil)#my hyperfixations are part of me and i cant just rip them out#its lik a tree grew its way in me and now if you rip it out i die#weird analogy but i dont really care#if one of my followers decides to unfollow me bc of liking d s m p. i understand#and f jfjemenfm why couldnt my brain latch onto like .#her mit craft#or somethjng#????#i wouldnt feel guilty ofer liking that#well . maybe i would but probably less idk#and i feel guilty interacting with any fan content of the d s m p#even just liking a post related to it makes me feel bad#and like ejrkfjfj this#i just wish i didnt like itever in the first place#idek how i got into it#but i did#aughcjekdjd#sorry for venting but . yea. i didnt intend for it to be one but apparently my brain wanted that. so#also dont expect me to go posting d s m p content after this cus.. im not#i purposefky never talk about it because if i do the demons (my ocd) will end me for it☺️☺️☺️☺️
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i know ive been saying i want to be a charger main but i just won SIX MATCHES IN A ROW with the tentatek splattershot ☠️☠️ might have to reconsider
#bragging warning im sorry im feeling very proud rn#okay for one BRIMWATER SPRINGS MY BELOVED#i think that map gives me good luck fr#ANYWAY I JUST WANTED TO SAY I ALWAYS HAD THE MOST POINTS + KILLS (except for once where i was 2nd place for points but. anw)#its so satisfying getting multiple shots in a row omg#also rip to all the rollers who came my way#yall were just moving so slow 🙁#ALSO ALSO SHOUTOUT TO SPLOON USER NOIRWAWAA OR WTV IT WAS#i kept splatting them and in the lobby i would follow them around#AND THEN WE WERE TEAMMATES AND WON A BUNCH IT WAS FUN !!#okay im done time 2 rewatch those matches over and over#cherie plays stuff!#splatoon
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