#im not gonna drink because i refuse to let him be the thing that trips me

[lover-of-mine]

.

[fleurdov]

this update actually broke me how am i supposed to function and act normal when i’m actually only thinking about the horrors of The Answer.

i really really loved this chapter though thank you so much for updating!!!! and now i will scream into the white void!!

THE ANSWER: XXVI

Kim Hongjoong doesn’t like the word ‘cult.’ He prefers ‘sect.’ pairing: ateez x fem reader genre: cult au, thriller, angst check warnings on AO3

← previous || next → || masterlist

chapter word count: 10,791

“What the hell did you say to Hongjoong?” 

Seonghwa is quick to start grilling you as soon as San leaves the two of you alone, glaring at you across from the dinner table. It takes you a few seconds to even remember what he could be referring to, that conversation with Hongjoong taking the back seat in your mind to everything else that had happened today. 

You set your spoon down, resting your elbows on the table, “I could be asking you the same question.” 

Seonghwa scoffs, mirroring your actions. He leans over the table, though, getting closer to you, “Well I asked first.” 

Frowning, you look him up and down, trying to make him squirm a little bit. Unfortunately for you, he doesn’t seem to find you very intimidating. In fact, he only leans closer to you, his face basically taking up your entire field of view. “What did Hongjoong say that I said?” 

Seonghwa’s eyes flit to your lips, but you pretend like you don’t notice. “He said that you told him we had sex. Among other things.” 

“I said no such thing,” you glare back at him, “I only heavily implied it.” 

“Why?” Seonghwa wets his lips, “do you want to get me in trouble, Princess?” 

You don’t want to be the one to back down from this confrontation, but being this close to Seonghwa without him touching you might actually make you insane. His stupid fucking hot ass fucking face. It’s too distracting. 

But… you’re more stubborn than you are uncomfortable. “Only if you want to get me in trouble.” He smiles a bit at that, but you continue, “if you must know, though, I had to use you as a bit of a scapegoat. I figured you wouldn’t mind, considering the lies you’re telling him about San and me.” 

“Lies?” Seonghwa says sarcastically, “what ever would I lie about?” The question is clearly rhetorical.

But you answer it anyway. “You told him that San and I are together.” 

Seonghwa’s smile grows, “and is that a lie? Aren’t you?” 

“Frankly, it’s not Hongjoong’s business, and it’s not yours, either.”

He brings a hand up to rest under his chin, shrugging his free shoulder. “Difference of opinion. Why should I lie to Hongjoong for you?” 

“Well, San and I aren’t together,” you shrug as well, hoping he’s not picking up on the fact that you’re lying through your teeth. It’s actually a bit… uncomfortable to lie about it like this. You don’t want to have to deny… whatever it is that you have going on with San, but that’s just how it is. You suck it up and hope that Seonghwa can’t see your internal battle as you spit the words out.

Seonghwa bites his lip, “is that so? So he wouldn’t mind if I…” 

You do lean back, then, smacking his elbow out from under him so that his head falls, hopefully shocking him back into reality. “You wish, pervert.” 

He catches his head before he actually hits it on the table, gaping at you, his eyes wide as if he can’t believe that you really just did that. Honestly, you’re kind of surprised that you did it, too. Seonghwa is so fucking tempting. But you’re stronger than that…

“Plus, what would he think,” you tip your head in Hongjoong’s direction, not surprised to see him already staring directly at the two of you. He had been congregating with some of the Followers, but his attention is now clearly occupied, a sneer appearing on his face when he catches you looking. “He already thinks we had sex, no?” 

Seonghwa looks back over his shoulder to glance at Hongjoong, quickly spinning back to face you when he sees the look on his leader’s face. “Yeah, thanks for that, by the way. I had the time of my life trying to explain that I had absolutely no idea what you were talking about.” 

You shrug, “I needed some way to get his mind off of the fact that someone told me about Haneul. It worked.” 

His eyes really go wide, then, “Haneul? Who the fuck told you about Haneul?” 

“You did.” You smile, finally picking your spoon back up to eat some more of your soup. This is a damn good soup, you have to remember to compliment Wooyoung on it… if you guys are on speaking terms. You’re not sure about that. 

Seonghwa groans, also resuming eating his dinner. “I’m going to get my ass handed to me, Princess. Why wouldn’t you just tell him the truth?” He pauses, dropping his spoon back into his soup, “ wait, let me guess. San told you?” 

You shake your head, taking another bite, ignoring his eyes.

“Who else have you been alone with?” 

You shrug again, just to piss him off. 

It doesn’t work. “When San attempted to help Haseul with the escapade last night, did he have someone watch you?” Seonghwa smiles in disbelief. “He really covered his bases. Who was it?” He searches your face as if the answer will be plastered on it. 

It might be, frankly. “It had to have been Wooyoung. Am I right, Princess? Wooyoung watched you? And told you? How on earth did you get that out of him?” 

Staying silent, you opt to keep eating your soup. Wooyoung is the obvious choice, looking at the people that San is close enough to trust with such a secret, so it makes sense that Seonghwa would be able to guess him so easily. But you’re not about to tell Seonghwa that he’s right, so you do your best to keep your face plain. 

“Oh, this is quite fun information. What else did he tell you? Did you see his back?” 

That must be what Wooyoung had been referring to, where his scars are. But, again, you’re not going to ask questions or make Seonghwa believe that he’s right. The last thing that you want to do is throw Wooyoung under the bus for spilling cult secrets that he clearly shouldn’t have. 

Seonghwa leans closer again, whispering, “if I promise to not tell Hongjoong, will you tell me? I’m very curious.” 

You also lean in closer, putting your spoon down once more, “absolutely not. But will you tell me about Haneul?” 

He rolls his eyes, leaning back into his original position. “No, I won’t. She’s quite a sore subject around here.” 

… Yeah, you could’ve guessed that. “Can you at least tell me about Jongho and her?” 

“No?” Seonghwa looks at you like you’ve really lost your mind, “that’s not your business, Princess.” 

“Oh, so their relationship isn’t my business, but my relationship with San is yours?” 

“So you admit to having a relationship with San, then?” Seonghwa smirks, pleased to have finally gotten something out of you.

You sigh, “if you’re jealous, you can just say so.” 

He scoffs, crossing his arms over his chest, “why on earth would I be jealous of Choi San? If I wanted you so badly, you would be with me.”

You try to make yourself look disgusted at the mere prospect, “that’s bold, even for you.” You say this like the two of you had never been intimate. 

Seonghwa shrugs, looking you up and down before leaning closer once more. “If anything, I’m jealous of his ability to disregard Hongjoong’s orders.” The meaning of this admission isn’t lost on you.

You can’t resist returning the look, letting your eyes linger on the way the sleeves of his shirt strain around his biceps. Personally, you don’t give a damn about Hongjoong’s “orders,” but you’re not about to let Seonghwa win this by giving into him. And you have San to worry about. You lean in closer as well, smiling at Seonghwa. 

“You’re a pervert,” you whisper, keeping the smile plastered on your face. 

Seonghwa smiles, too, despite scoffing at your comment, “that’s really cute, coming from you, Princess.” 

“What is?” San’s voice appears from your side, making the both of you jump backward from each other. 

Seonghwa keeps the nasty smile on his face, looking up at San, “perfect timing, San. If you’d left her alone with me any longer…”

San gives you a puzzled look, sliding onto the seat next to you. He doesn’t get himself a meal, which is… a little strange, but you ignore it, going back to eating your own. 

He ignores Seonghwa’s comment easily. “I couldn’t miss the announcement, could I?” San asks Seonghwa, smiling tightly across the table. 

“Announcement?” You ask, looking between the two of them.

Seonghwa holds a hand up before San can start explaining. “You’ll see, Princess.” He smiles at you like you’re not going to like this announcement at all. “But, San, pray tell, where did you just run off to?” 

San gives you a sideways glance, and you can only imagine that he probably was doing something that you wouldn’t exactly care for. “I had a conversation that needed to be held, privately.” 

Seonghwa raises his eyebrows, “is that so? What ever about? Whomever with?” He asks these questions as if he knows perfectly well their answers, but wants to hear San admit it anyhow. “Why couldn’t your dear (Y/n) be in attendance?” 

You honestly aren’t really sure what San means, but the only explanation that you can think is… he apologized to Mingi? That would honestly make you rather happy, though, so you’re not sure why he wouldn’t want to say it in front of you. Maybe Seonghwa truly doesn’t know, and he wants to keep it that way? You’re honestly not too bothered by the fact that he doesn’t want to say. 

Before San can respond, the cafeteria falls completely silent. 

You twist in your seat to face the front of the room, not at all surprised to see Hongjoong standing there, his hands folded behind his back. He still has that weird outfit on, the ties of the robe dangling down, brushing against his knees with each small movement he makes. 

He looks to you, then, giving you a sideways smile before turning back to address the room. 

“It is with great joy that I make this announcement tonight.” The cafeteria is just as silent as the chapel. You look around, not at all surprised to see that not a single pair of eyes aren’t on Hongjoong. “Finally, we are prepared to start our harvest season.” 

A gentle applause starts, much like the kind you would expect at some sort of… gala, or something. Hongjoong holds a hand up and it immediately halts, everyone in the room once again waiting with baited breath. “Of course, this indicates the start of prosperous times for our group,” he gives you another glance, “but it also invites upon us some of the most troublesome ceremonies and events, as well as opening the door to… unwelcome possibilities.” 

… Yeah, whatever the hell that means. 

“As harvest will commence in the morning, our first event will happen during our morning gathering. I expect everyone to be in attendance, including children and those otherwise excused. It’s important that we are united as a group, as you all very well know.”

Everyone? Does that include Haseul? Surely it does, even if she hasn’t had a Choosing Ceremony. You want to believe that you’ll get to see your friend, but… You’re not sure. Hongjoong probably will keep her from you as long as he can; keep you on his little leash until he’s decided that you’re obedient enough again.

He waits, holding the attention of the room for a second longer, a tense look on his face. “You all must know that I don’t say these things to scare you. But the harvest season is trying for the Sign, and our connection is in peril every second that…” Hongjoong clears his throat around the words. “That we leave it unguarded. Those participating in the morning ceremony will be notified tonight.” 

With that, he turns away from the center of the cafeteria, eyes locking onto your table. Conversation picks back up as he strides toward the three of you, a smile replacing the tenseness. 

“Let me guess,” you say to neither Seonghwa nor San in particular, “I’m about to be notified of something?” 

Seonghwa smirks, “you can be so bright sometimes.” 

“(Y/n)!” Hongjoong calls your name when he’s a few feet away, closing the distance enough to rest a hand on your shoulder before asking, “Are you excited for your first harvest?” 

You blink up at him, amazed that he still even bothers, “you just made it sound like something to be weary of, rather than excited for.” 

He shrugs, squeezing your shoulder once before releasing you to sit next to Seonghwa. “We haven’t covered the Guardians yet.” 

“The what now?” 

Hongjoong waves his hand in the air to dismiss your question, “you’ll learn in due time.”

For a second, you think that Seonghwa even rolls his eyes, but that would be truly unfathomable. You’re happy enough to write off whatever the fuck the ‘Guardians’ are. The last thing you want right now is another lesson in cult lore.

“Anyhow,” he clasps his hands, resting them on the table. “You’ll be participating in the ceremony tomorrow. Its a fun one, too.” 

You look at San, though he’s looking anywhere but at you. Turning back to Hongjoong, you ask, “do I get to know what this ceremony entails ahead of time, or are you going to surprise stab me again?” You’re honestly surprised by how bold you feel, given everything that’s happened. Maybe seeing him cry reduces him a little bit… no, that’s not it. Whatever it was, you’re just not feeling particularly intimidated by Hongjoong at the moment, surprisingly.

Hongjoong waves a hand in the air, “there’s no need to be so dramatic, (Y/n).”

Honestly, you still think it was a fair question. But you feel lucky that he’s clearly in the bantering mood as well.

“You’ve already been Chosen; you won’t have to prove yourself again,” San offers, albeit rather quietly and more so to himself than to you. 

“I feel that its best that you’re prepared for the ceremony,” Hongjoong ignores San’s comment, “Seonghwa can cover it with you.” 

Seonghwa jerks his head toward his leader. “I can? I thought I wa—”

Hongjoong smiles, stopping Seonghwa in his tracks. “You’ll do as I say.”

He only nods in response, turning away from Hongjoong. To your relief, he doesn’t lay a glare on you once more, returning to his meal instead. 

“San, let’s talk privately for a moment,” Hongjoong rises, beckoning San to follow him. San furrows his brows, but stands anyway, following Hongjoong until they’re out of earshot from your table.

You turn your attention back to Seonghwa. “Let me hear it.” 

He drops his spoon again, looking annoyed at the prospect of having to spend anymore time with you. “I need a copy of The Answer to properly explain it.” 

“You’re telling me you don’t keep one on yourself at all times?” 

Seonghwa blinks at you. Leaning back, he unbuttons his jacket, reaching a hand to the inside pocket. Low and behold, he pulls a copy of The Answer from the interior pocket, gently placing it onto the table between you two. 

You had been half joking. 

He buttons his jacket again, sliding his tray away from himself. Wordlessly, he picks up the book, flipping to the back pages before landing on whatever page he was searching for. He turns his wrist, showing you the page.

Highlighted in yellow and underlined maybe five times is the title:

HARVEST PRACTICES

The chapter that follows is broken into a few different sections, from what you can see on the pages in view. The first subtitle reads:

INVOCATION AND PROTECTION

“Your hand is shaking too much for me to read that,” you complain, grabbing the book from Seonghwa’s hands. You slide your own tray away, setting the book on the table to read. 

The text continues.

Perhaps one of the most strenuous times a year comes during harvest season. Though the crop can be bountiful and the blessings many, there are also dangers that follow. This implicates the necessity to instate a protective guard around our group; a ward to protect ourselves so as to protect our Clones. 

On the first day of the harvest, the following ceremony must be conducted to insure safety throughout the season. The steps are outlined here; however HONGJOONG may adapt these provisions as he sees fit per the requirements of the year. 

Typical ceremony regalia should be worn by all Followers. Ten Followers are chosen at random to participate in the ceremony.

Participation is mandatory once selected; certain Followers may be required to participate every year due to their given role in Universe One. 

At 6 A.M. The ceremony begins. The ten Followers link hands in a circle.

They recite the following incantation, taking three steps to the left following each break.

On this day we make our vow.

The Answer is near; we shall not wonder or fear.

I myself am mighty and true. My blood will protect and provide anew

The barrier is weak.

United, we cast away the evil that would do us harm. We uninvite the spirits that dance between this Universe and the next.

Following the incantation, each member shall raise their hands. The ceremonial blade is presented, and each Follower shall gently open their left palm, letting the blood drop into the center of the circle while reciting:

I offer this vessel of myself for the betterment of the community. My blood banishes the evil from them, and calls it toward me. I swear this today and everyday.

At the completion of each vow, the final words will be said:

We call upon you to stay away.

The Sacrifice will then be presented. It is to be left on the altar for one day.

This is the conclusion of the ceremony.

This ceremony is not infallible. Should trouble arise before, during, or after, HONGJOONG and designated Followers will resolve the issue. 

You stop reading, looking up at Seonghwa. “Sacrifice?”

He nods. 

“That’s, like, pretty cliche,” you frown, “and that rhyme sucks.” 

“Be more respectful.” Seonghwa mirrors your frown, “Hongjoong isn’t a poet, he’s a prophet.” 

“Really? I thought he was God?” 

Seonghwa only gives you a more exasperated look, rolling his eyes.

You scan over the ceremony again, trying to make sure you’re getting the details correct. “What’s this about ‘calling the evil towards me?’ And the blood? Is that really necessary?” 

He glances over your shoulder, a relieved expression gracing his features, “San, you have a knack for perfect timing today.”

You turn to look back and, sure enough, San is approaching your table again. 

San looks between you, Seonghwa, and the copy of The Answer in your hands, putting the pieces together. “Questions?” 

“A few,” you mutter, suddenly not very interested. You don’t mind pestering Seonghwa for answers to all of your questions, but you aren’t keen on asking San the same way. “But it can wait. What did Hongjoong want?”

San takes his place next to you again, shrugging as he does so. “He was just letting me know the plan for tomorrow.” 

Seonghwa reaches for his book, plucking it out of your hands before you can respond to San. “I trust you won’t be needing my copy, anymore.” 

Resisting the urge to mock him, you respond to San instead. “Such as…?”

“When to be there, how to help you dress, so on.” 

So on… Why does it feel like there’s a lot more emphasis on the ending of that list? They had been gone for a good five minutes, there had to be more than that, surely. Why wouldn’t San tell you the whole truth? What good would that do for him? 

You stay quiet, trying to ignore your suspicions. If you can’t trust San, who can you trust? 

.・。.・゜��� ⧖ ・.・ ⧖ ✫・゜・。.

It turns out that you have to wake up significantly more early than usual.

San shakes you awake at four, ignoring your pleas for five more minutes. “I waited as long as I could, (Y/n).” 

You grumble and moan, but find it in yourself to get out of bed. For Haseul. That’s what you tell yourself. All of this is for Haseul. Your cooperation is for her. Had she not been here, you’d be kicking and screaming the whole way. 

But, unfortunately, Hongjoong figured out how to play you like a damn fiddle. So here you are, tugging on the same black dress pants that you had put on… what, three weeks ago? A month ago? Longer? You have no idea. 

You manage to button your shirt correctly this time, though your face burns at the memory of Seonghwa having to help you dress. What had happened to you? You never would have thought that the day would come where you would voluntarily wear this… cult regalia. 

San watches, already fully dressed by the time that he woke you up. You have to admit that he looks handsome in all black, the clothes clearly tailored to fit him. Two or three silver necklaces hang down his chest, matching rings gracing his fingers. He hasn’t put his mask on, yet, or his hat, leaving his features exposed in the security of your apartment. 

“Let me help,” he offers, squatting to his knees to help you tie your boots as you pull them on. He ties your right shoe as you tie your left, lacing them with the deftness of well-trained hands. 

Of course, he finishes before you do. He takes over tying your left shoe, smiling up at you as you yield the laces to him. “Thank you.” 

He only pats your knee, standing back up and offering his hand to you. You take it and rise as well, glancing at the clock. 4:29. 

The ceremony starts at 6. You’re not really sure why you have to be in positions so early, but… whatever. You’re not going to fight it. You can do this, you’re sure of it. For Haseul, you’ll do it. 

San opens the wardrobe, grabbing your two hats off of the top shelf. Had you ever noticed them sitting there? You’re not sure. Maybe someone had brought them in. 

He hands you yours, swirling his around on his finger instead of putting it on. “How are you feeling?” 

You put the hat on. “Fine.” 

“You sure?” He sounds genuine enough, and you don’t doubt that he’s at least a little worried for you. And, obviously, given the circumstances with Haseul… 

“I just hope I don’t fuck up.” 

San frowns, reaching for your hand. You let him take it. 

“Everything will be fine,” he promises, rubbing your hand with his. “It’ll be over before you know it!” 

Forcing a smile, you nod. He’s probably right. If you just grit your teeth and bare it, the whole thing will be over as quickly as you can say the stupid little incantation. There’s no reason to be afraid or worried. 

… That’s what you really want to believe. But you can’t bring yourself to think that it will actually be that easy. Something is going to happen. Something bad. You’re sure of it, now, in this moment. You’re more sure of it than anything else. 

Hongjoong won’t just let this happen. He won’t just let this pan out easily. He has something planned, and you’re sure that it’s something terrible…

The sacrifice mentioned in the steps… you had never had the chance to ask about it. Something is going to happen then, you’re sure. At the moment of the sacrifice or the moment that it’s presented, it’s going to be something beyond even your imagination. 

Hongjoong’s insanity knows no bounds, and that is something that you know for a positive fact. He can’t just have something go well or normally when you’re involved. He will have to stick his fingers in the pie, have to meddle to make something happen. 

Your stomach flips as you consider the possibilities. You suddenly feel woozy. 

“Hey,” San calls your attention back to the moment at hand, grabbing your other arm with his free hand. “Are you alright?” 

You blink at him, “Just a little lightheaded is all.” 

“Do you want something to eat?” He starts to pull you toward the kitchenette, but the thought of eating only makes your stomach feel heavier. 

Planting your feet, you shake your head. “No, no, I’m fine. I just want to get this over with.”

You’re not lying. If something is going to happen (when something is going to happen), you would rather just have it be done and have it be over. 

Whatever it is, you’re sure that you can survive it. You’ve made it this far without losing your wits or dying, you’re sure that you can make it through a ten minute ordeal. Even if it is particularly nasty or horrible. 

Fuck, you just hope the sacrifice isn’t a person. You’re, like, sixty percent sure that it won’t be, but… that forty percent is still a question mark. At least you know it won’t be you. 

That’s probably not the right mindset. But, hey, that’s life, isn’t it? 

San looks between you and the clock, looking disappointed. “I guess we don’t really have time, anyhow. I’m sorry.” He apologizes, dropping his hands from you. 

You brush off the apology, following him as he leaves the room and approaches your door. 

“You’re sure that you’re okay?” San asks again, pausing by your front door. “I can make up some excuse if I have to.” 

You don’t have to force a smile, this time. “I’m going to be fine as soon as this is over.” 

He nods in acceptance, opening the door and holding it open for you.

The two of you head to the chapel in silence, other Followers wearing their all-black regalia crowding the hallways and stairwells. A few people smile and wave at you, though you can’t really say that you recognize them. 

As you squeeze through the halls, you wonder where Haseul is being kept. In one of the single rooms, you’re sure, but which one… 

You almost have the urge to start knocking on every door on the women’s floor, jangle each doorknob and greet each person until you find her…

But that would be silly, and you know that. You’d only be punished if you went looking for her. Worse, she would probably be punished for your stupidity, too. 

That’s not going to happen. 

So you fight the feeling, just as you fought your panic. Your stomach is still a wreck as you follow San. You don’t hold his hand, not in public, but you wish that you could grab him for some semblance of comfort. 

He would take your hand if you tried, you realize. Clearly, he doesn’t have much of an issue speaking about your relationship, at least with Mingi. 

The memory of their argument brings a sour expression to your face. You’re still not very pleased with how San had acted, or with how Mingi had, either. Even after the apology… 

And San never confirmed that he apologized to Mingi. Well, you had never asked him. 

But whatever. That has to be a problem for another day, for another you. Or at least for the you of three hours from now. You can’t go into this being pissed at basically the only two people that you like here. 

That doesn’t give much credit to Nayeon or Yunho or Wooyoung or Yeosang, you realize, but whatever. You don’t need to be debating who your friends are and who your friends aren’t.

After what happened with Wooyoung, anyways, would you really consider him a friend? Had you really processed any of what he had told you? What the fuck.

Your head swims with the reality of everything that has been happening to you in the past couple days. You’ve experienced enough goddamn trauma to let Dr. Phil run another 12 seasons on you alone. Fucking hell. Literally what the fuck.

You finally reach the big doors, relishing the feeling of stepping into the cool outside air. The hallways had been stuffy with the weight of all of the Followers, and the sudden breeze is refreshing; especially given your fucking outfit. 

The sun hasn’t even poked above the horizon, yet. You wouldn’t even call it dawn. But you don’t have to squint to make out the chapel in this distance. 

The sea of Followers in front of you lead the way to the holy place, a swarm of black across the farm. 

You wonder how many of them there really are. If Hongjoong said that everyone had to attend this ceremony… fuck. There’s a lot of people. Just the people you can see outside seem to outnumber what you would have originally thought. 

How in the world had Hongjoong recruited so many people? 

How many of these people actually believed every word that he said? You’d have to assume most of them. What would they do to make him happy? To keep him happy? 

The thought sends an unwelcome shiver down your spine, only making your stomach worse.

The walk isn’t long, and you soon find yourself passing the doors that are being held open by the swarm of people crowding through them. 

It’s fuller than you’ve ever seen it, the chapel. Some people are already seated in the pews, chatting with their peers. The majority of the Followers, however, are still standing, mingling in the aisle.

You follow San’s lead, presuming that he’ll take you wherever you need to be. He goes about halfway to the front of the chapel, stopping in a less-populated area of the aisle in what you assume is an attempt to make you calmer. You’re not sure that it helps, but you appreciate the gesture, anyhow.

You wonder who the other Followers that were chosen for the ceremony are. Will anyone that you know be up there to comfort you? It probably wouldn’t make a difference, but at least one familiar face would be welcome. 

As you glance around the room, you find your eyes tugging toward the Sign of the Answer, the huge one on the wall. Hongjoong’s chair is gone in preparation for the ceremony, so you’re able to see it in all of its glory. Per usual, the chapel is lit by candles, and the light glints off of the Sign exactly how you remember it looking the night that you had been Chosen. The memory makes you more nervous.

San puts a hand on your arm, calling your attention back to him. You glance at his face first, only to see him looking ahead as someone approaches. For a split second, you’re worried that its going to be Mingi. 

But it’s only Wooyoung, you realize. 

He stops in front of you, two glasses in his hands. “Hello,” he greets you, looking between the two of you.

San returns the hello, but you can’t bring yourself to respond. Something about the sight of him disturbs you. And the glasses in his hands.

He gets straight to business.

“Drink this,” Wooyoung holds out a champagne glass filled with something that is decidedly not champagne. Instead of sparkling, yellow liquid, this is a flat, blood red. 

You hesitantly take the stem, tilting the glass to watch the liquid move. Thankfully, it doesn’t actually seem to be blood. You take a sniff, not all that surprised to smell the familiar red wine scent. 

“It’s just wine. For the nerves.”

Shrugging, you take a sip. He’s not lying, but… “Last time you fed me in this room you also drugged me.” 

Wooyoung mirrors your shrug. “Don’t drink it then.”

You glance at San, who also shrugs. 

“Well fuck it, then.” In an action reminiscent of your college days, you down the glass; ignoring the bitterness as best you can. 

Wooyoung takes the glass back from you. “Good luck, then.” 

He excuses himself, wandering back into the crowd with the other glass. You assume that he’s handing them out to all of the participating Followers, but you opt to stop watching him to look back at San.

“Do you think that was drugged?” You ask San, rubbing your palms on your jacket. 

His eyes go wide, “I wouldn’t have let you drink it if I thought it was!” 

“I’m not sure I trust Hongjoong that much.” 

“I do.” San puts a hand on your shoulder, rubbing it gently. His words don’t offer you any comfort, but the hand is pleasant enough.

Well, you’ll know soon enough, anyhow. Maybe this would all go a lot more smoothly if you were drugged, somehow. Your heart feels like a damn jackhammer in your chest.

You try to look around, wanting to spot any familiar face in the crowd for any sense of comfort. It’s just so damn hard with everyone dressed like the fucking grim reaper. You think that you spot Nayeon, briefly, her long brown hair contrasting beautifully to the fitted black of her coat. 

Yunho is hard to miss, his height only exaggerated by the hat atop his head. You’re not entirely sure where you stand with him, though, given your place with Mingi. If Mingi’s still pissed at you (which, to give him credit, you’re not sure if he is), Yunho probably is too. 

Speaking of Mingi, he approaches Yunho, his own height rather hard to miss in the crowd. He grabs his friend’s shoulder, exclaiming something that’s a bit too quiet for you to make out. But you know Mingi’s voice when you hear it. 

After this, you have to talk to Mingi. Even though you might be a little… upset? Disappointed? At his outburst and his childish behavior, you have to make things right by him. Yunho, too, you suppose. 

You still hold out hope that Haseul will make an appearance, though you’re sure Hongjoong made arrangements to keep her away. Though… if Mingi is here, who's watching her? It probably wouldn’t be hard to find someone else, but someone else that Hongjoong trusted that much… that’s a different story. You know that you should probably just drop it, but there’s something in you that feels like she’ll show up… you certainly have a lot of feelings, this morning. 

A hand wraps around your elbow, startling you. You don’t have to look to recognize Hongjoong, his touch alone enough to identify him, burning hot even through your jacket.

“(Y/n),” he purrs, holding you close to him, “how are you feeling?” 

You try to pull your arm away, to no avail. “Like I’m going to be sick.” 

Hongjoong laughs, “you’ll be completely fine. You’re not the sacrifice.” 

That doesn’t do anything to calm your nerves. That’s not what you’re worried about. And you’d rather not have to play one of his stupid games. “I have a sense that some anvil is about to fall on my head.” 

“Hmmm,” he hums, “maybe. Maybe not. It depends on what you’re picturing.”

“I’m picturing what you wrote in The Answer.” You force the words out through gritted teeth. It’s so fucking annoying when he does this; when he doesn’t just speak his mind. You’d much prefer him telling you that, yeah, you’re about to be grievously harmed than have him just dangle the thought in front of your eyes.

“Well, either way, I’m sure you understand what will happen if you disrupt the ceremony.” Hongjoong’s voice is laced with that sickening smile of his, “or if you fail to complete your part in it.” 

He’s right, he doesn’t need to remind you in the slightest. You can only imagine the fear that Haseul is in right now, but your own fear for her must be ten times worse. The idea of Hongjoong putting his hands on her makes your gut churn.

The fact that he backed you into such a perfect corner is almost sickening. It pisses you off to no end. Why did he have to bring her into this? Not that you would want him to use this treatment on Mingi, but, like, fuck, he at least already had him here. Was it really necessary to involve a completely innocent girl? 

If you didn’t care what happened to her, you might just spit in the man’s face at this very second. 

“I get it, Hongjoong.” 

“Then you’ll do great!” He releases your arm, opting to pat your shoulder a couple times. “Simply stick to the outline. Do your part. And it’ll be over quickly.” 

You take a deep breath, “Hongjoong,” you hope that saying his name will make him listen to you, “can I see her, afterword?” 

His hand stops on your shoulder, squeezing. “Let’s see how you fare, first.” His voice seems harder with these words, more sharp. Hopefully that wasn’t some sort of huge overstep to him. 

He cuts off the conversation at that, leaving your side to rejoin the crowd of Followers. He’s wearing the same outfit he had been wearing yesterday, the shiny material catching the light of the candles ever so as he moves. 

“San,” you turn toward where San was standing, only to find him gone. You whirl around in a circle in a way that must look comical, searching for where he could have gone off to. He doesn’t appear to be in your near vicinity, somehow completely, wordlessly disappeared. 

Dread swirls in your stomach. You were going to ask him if he knew what the sacrifice was going to be, finally reminded.

As if commanded by some outside force, the majority of the Followers suddenly stop their conversations. The room falls silent as people make their ways to their usual pews, sliding silently into their seats. 

Per usual, you’ve been left out of the loop. 

Without San to guide you into place, you really have no idea what you’re supposed to be doing. You look toward the front of the chapel, expecting to find Hongjoong glaring at you, but not even he is there to tell you what to do. 

Looking around to the other Followers that are still standing, you’re mildly surprised to see Yunho only a couple feet away. He catches your eye, tipping his head toward the front of the room in signal. He starts walking, so you start walking. 

You’re hyper aware of the sound of your footsteps on the wood floors, your boots clicking with each step. Yunho’s do, too. The steps are the only sound in the chapel. 

With bated breath, you reach the front of the room. You glance toward your usual pew, hoping to see San sitting in your spot. He’s not, however, only making the rock in your stomach that much heavier. 

Yunho steps up onto the little stage, offering you his hand to help with the step up. You take it, joining him and turning toward the congregation of Followers. From this angle, you can see… it takes you a second to count the heads… eight other Followers approaching the stage. You try to find Hongjoong among them, but he’s not there. Neither is San.

After what feels like forever, Yunho and yourself are joined by the others. You read this part, you feel okay about it. Well, not okay okay, but, like, you know. At least you know what to expect. 

Yunho grabs your left hand, as someone you can’t recall the name of takes the place to your right; taking that hand into theirs. 

The ten of you link into a circle, hand-in-hand. 

You had kind of expected there to be more guidance from Hongjoong in this process. A narration or a sort of sermon over the top of your actions, but Hongjoong remains unseen and unheard as the Followers around you start their recitation. 

“On this day we make our vow,” you don’t jump into the speech until the next sentence, unsure of how they knew that it was time to start. “From henceforth we pledge ourselves.”

You take three steps to your left. The Sign of the Answer twinkles in your peripheral vision. The Followers in the pews have their heads bowed. 

“The Answer is near. We shall not wonder or fear.” 

Three more steps. 

“I myself am mighty and true. My blood will protect and provide anew.” 

Three more steps to the left. This time, you almost step on Yunho’s toes. You try to look at the other Followers in your circle, but their heads are similarly bowed. You look back down at your feet. You’re lightheaded. 

“The barrier is weak.”

Your hands float upwards, along with the rest of the circle’s. Still connected, everyone’s hands hang in the air of the center of the circle. 

“United, we cast away the evil that would do us harm. We uninvite the spirits that dance between this Universe and the next.” 

Someone, you’re not sure who, breaks the circle first. Your eyes are closed, you realize. You open them only when Yunho’s hand leaves your own; barely hearing his hushed whispering at your side. Before you know it, the knife is in your own hands. 

It’s already sparkling with blood. At least Yunho’s. The lowlight makes it hard to see, but the Sign of the Answer does a beautiful job of illuminating just enough to reawaken your nausea. What the fuck is happening, right now? What the fuck are you about to do?

Yunho’s blood drips down the blade and onto your hand. It’s warm. 

You’re sure that you’re going to faint. 

But you hold the blade to your left hand, anyways, saying the words as quietly as you can. Surely, this is all just some batshit insane cult ceremony, but the weight of speaking them outloud is still sickening. 

“I offer this vessel of myself for the betterment of the community. My blood banishes the evil from them, and calls it toward me. I swear this today and everyday.” 

You swipe the blade across your palm, handing it off to the Follower next to you as fast as you can manage. You close your eyes again. Your hand burns. You almost think that you can hear your blood, dropping from your palm and hitting the floor.

At some point, the last person finishes. The knife clatters to the floor, the only sound in the chapel. You know to take three more steps to the left. And to finish the words. 

“We call upon you to stay away.” 

The scream makes you open your eyes. 

Disorientated, you realize that you’re facing away from the crowd, staring directly at the Sign. But it’s not glowing anymore. 

You turn around, blinded. Every candle in the chapel has gone out.

Was that the source of the scream? The lights going out? What the fuc—

The door behind the stage slams open. You jump again, spinning back as though you’d be able to see anything, anyhow. 

Someone in the audience wails. 

Are they seeing something that you’re not? Your heart pounds hard, so so hard. Is this panic? The spell? A heart attack? 

You need to sit down. Yunho grabs your hand before you can stumble off of the stage. He pulls you behind him, keeping the arm behind his back to hold you there. 

You fist the back of his coat, probably soiling the material with your blood, but it’s all you can do to keep yourself standing upright. The urge to vomit hits you again, but you prevail, closing your eyes as tight as you can. 

Is this supposed to happen? This wasn’t in the outline. Are you meant to feel like such shit right now?

How did all of the candles go out?

Who the fuck is interrupting? 

Something, or someone, drops in the middle of the circle. 

You open your eyes again, peering around Yunho. The rest of the circle had stayed in place. 

At the center of your circle, now, is a head. 

Not a human head, thank God, but a pig’s. Your stomach still revolts, still tumbling over and over itself as you slide back into your spot in the circle. You clamp onto Yunho’s hand like its the only thing that you’ve ever known, grounding yourself the only way that you can. 

Its still so dark. You close your eyes again

You’re not sure what you’re supposed to do now. Is it over? You hope to God that its over. You can’t take another goddamned minute of thi—

You open your eyes at the same instant that Yunho yells. Everything happens so fucking fast. 

Yunho falls backward, off of the stage. You process this secondly. Chiefly, however, your attention is caught by the figure now in front of you, where the pig head had been seconds before. 

It’s huge. You can’t comprehend it entirely, what it is that you’re seeing. It doesn’t even look human. It grabs your now vacant hand, pulling you away from the Followers. 

There’s a collective scream behind you, and you’re not surprised to realize that you’re also screaming. 

You try to look into the face. But it doesn’t have a face. It’s nothing. Is this death? 

You’re falling backwards, now. Before you know it, you’re on the ground, curling in on yourself.

Someone turns the overhead lights on. You cradle your hands to your chest, aware of the fact that you’re crying. The tears are hot on your cheeks. The blood is hot on your hands. The feeling of that, that, fucking thing making you want to retch. 

What the fuck was that? What the fuck? 

Hongjoong appears at your side, his face blurry. From your tears, from the panic? You’re not sure. 

He asks if you’re okay. You can’t answer him. You close your eyes again.

.・。.・゜✭ ⧖ ・.・ ⧖ ✫・゜・。.

In your sleep, you see it again. 

Even in this instance, you can’t tell what it is. It’s shaped like a person, but you can’t look directly at it. You know that if you look, it won’t have a face.

In your dream, it’s even bigger than it was. It towers over you, grabbing you over and over, your screaming and begging doing nothing to appease it. 

You can see its hands as they reach, as they latch onto you. They’re white. But they’re not skin. It’s cloth, you realize, gloves. 

The rest of it is white, too. But it certainly doesn’t look like clothing. You couldn’t ever explain it to someone if they asked, and you’re much too terrified to go digging into the details. 

All you know is that it doesn’t have a face. It’s not natural. Every part of you hates every part of this thing. 

You want to wake up.

.・。.・゜✭ ⧖ ・.・ ⧖ ✫・゜・。.

And so you do, in the infirmary. 

The first thing you see are the familiar ceiling tiles. The second thing is Hongjoong.

You startle awake, twitching in on yourself as you try to sit up. 

Hongjoong sucks in a breath, though he doesn’t get to his feet to help you. He’s still wearing that outfit. 

You’re still wearing yours, you realize. The pants rub uncomfortably against the blanket laying over you. You’re able to sit up easily enough, and you’re relieved to realize that nothing hurts. You feel fine.

“So, do you believe me now?” Hongjoong asks once you’re up, but he’s not smiling in triumph as you would’ve imagined.

“What the fuck was that thing?” 

Hongjoong sighs, “Exactly what I was trying to protect us from. A guardian.”

You blink at him, dumbfounded. There’s literally no fucking way in hell that Hongjoong has been right about any of this. He’s insane. He is fully, entirely, batshit insane. 

You can’t explain away whatever the fuck just happened, but you’re not about to accept that he’s been telling you the truth. That there are alternate universes and demons that can jump between them. That’s not real life. That’s not how the world works. 

Whatever just happened, whatever that was, there’s a reasonable explanation. Surely. 

Though you can’t imagine what that explanation would be, it must exist. The last fucking thing in the world that you’re going to do now is believe in Hongjoong. Like, what the fuck? What the fuck? Why would you fucking believe in a fucking religion that has fucking faceless demons fucking running around freely? You wouldn’t. You refuse. You will not. 

Even if that is the only explanation for the thing in white, you are not going to believe it. You would sooner believe that you have a hallucination disorder than accept that Hongjoong is right about anything. 

Thinking about it, you probably would have to have some sort of psychosis to accept any of this. But, then again, this is exactly the sort of thing that would trigger psychosis… 

You’re thinking way too fucking hard about this. It is simple. Hongjoong is a freak.

“Where’s San?” The question is natural. 

Hongjoong raises his eyebrows, “Interesting follow-up question. I thought it best to separate you two for now.” 

“Why?” 

He doesn’t answer your question. Instead, he stands up. “How is your hand?” 

You had honestly forgotten about it. Holding it up, you examine your bandage. “Fine.” 

The two of you stay in silence. Hongjoong seems mad. 

“Is that really all you’re going to ask?” He asks, almost sounding whiny. Like a child. 

It’s certainly all you’re going to ask him. He’ll only lie to you. “Can I see Seonghwa?” You ask instead.

Hongjoong scoffs. He brushes his hair back, looking around the room as if he’s expecting some live studio audience to empathize with him. “I know you’re not fucking him.” 

You shrug. “Are you okay, Hongjoong?” 

His face falls flat. He crosses his arms over his chest, turning to fully face you again. “I’m great.” The words are strained. You’ve never known Hongjoong to be a bad liar. 

“You seem kinda pissed.” 

“I am not—” He closes his eyes, bringing a hand up to his forehead. “I’m fine. I’ll have Seonghwa come visit, since you clearly won’t be speaking to me.” He says this like he expects you to apologize. But what the hell would you apologize for? 

Hongjoong leaves without another word once it becomes clear that you won’t be giving him what he wants. You’re sure that he expected more crying, more fear, more begging and pleading for answers. 

You save that for once you’re sure that he’s gone.

Trembling, you pull your knees to your chest. Your fingers twitch with fear, your hair feels foreignly heavy, your wrist burns and burns where the thing had touched you. 

You refuse to believe that it was real. It cannot be real. None of this can be real. There was some trick, some show, some plan that you weren’t privy to. Seonghwa will tell you. He’ll have to tell you. He’s honest, most of the time. He’ll explain it away, he’ll tell you how Hongjoong did it and why it seemed so real. 

Where was its face? 

How had they done that? Where the fact should have been, there was nothing. You couldn’t even say that it was a color. It was a void. An emptiness. There was nothing there. 

The memory makes you dizzy. You lean back against the pillows, praying to God that you’re not going insane. Had you really seen that? You couldn’t have. Because that’s just not something that’s possible. 

If Seonghwa can’t explain this, you might go crazy. You might. What else is there to do? It wasn’t real. But the fear that you’re feeling now certainly is. 

What if it comes back? What if they make it come back? What was it? Where was its face? 

Even though whatever the fuck that was wasn’t real, the memory certainly is. You’re going to be lucky to sleep soundly one night for the rest of your damn life. What the fuck. 

Seonghwa lets himself into the room only a few minutes after Hongjoong had left. 

“You like me so much that you ask for me now?” He smirks, approaching your side. 

His face falls flat when he takes a good look at you. “Stop that. Why are you crying?” 

“Seonghwa.” You feel that it’s quite obvious why you’re crying. 

He only blinks at you. 

“What the fuck was that?” Your voice shakes with the question. 

“I—” He starts, opening and closing his mouth a few times. “Its complicated.” 

You cover your face with your hands. “Was it real? Just be honest.” 

You can’t see his reaction to your question, and he doesn’t answer it, either. 

“What was it?” You moan, hardly able to even spit the words out. To basically admit to Seonghwa that you were scared.

“I think it would be better if you talked to Hongjoo—”

“I am not talking to Hongjoong!” 

You take your hands away from your face, needing to look at him. You hate him. You hate him more than fucking anything. Why can’t he just be honest? Why is he Hongjoong’s little fucking doll? Why does he worship him to such a degree when he’s this fucking evil? Where would he draw the line? 

Seonghwa is stunned into silence. He only stares down at you.

“All I can say is that I didn’t know it was going to happen.” 

He looks blurry through your tears, only making you angrier as you recall Hongjoong looking the same way.

“Stop bullshitting me, please, Seonghwa,” you beg. “I think I’ll go insane if you don’t fucking answer me.” 

He turns away from your bed, striding to one of the medicine cabinets in an attempt to look anywhere but your face. He rakes a hand through his hair, pushing it away from his forehead momentarily. 

“What do you want to hear?” He asks, turning back toward you, though he keeps his distance. “Would you rather know what Hongjoong is capable of or would you rather keep the comforting thought that he’s right? Wouldn’t that just be easier for everybody?” 

“You’re saying that Hongjoong can do things scarier than the thought of fucking interdimensional demons being real?” You throw your hands out in front of you, almost yelling in frustration. 

“That’s exactly what I’m saying! Yes!” Seonghwa matches your tone. “He’s only going to come at you harder. He exists to make you break! Just fucking accept the truth for what he says that it is, and everything will come easily!” 

“I’m not going to do that!” 

Seonghwa laughs bitterly. “I’m sure you believe that, too, Princess.” 

You stare back at him, sure that you look insane. “Can you be genuine for one fucking second?” 

His face contorts into a scowl. “I’ve never been anything but genuine with you. You’re the one that deludes yourself.” He strides back to the door, freezing in the frame. “Is there anything else you wish to fling at me?” 

“I’m taking this to mean that it wasn’t real.” 

“If that helps you sleep at night.” 

Seonghwa leaves. 

.・。.・゜✭ ⧖ ・.・ ⧖ ✫・゜・。.

Can you bear some girl time? You’re not sure as Nayeon lets herself in, walking casually into the room as if the literal antichrist of her religion didn’t just make a physical appearance before her. 

“How are we feeling?” She asks, dragging out the vowel sounds in her question. 

“Uhm,” you look at your hand, the only injured part of your body, “fine, I guess.” 

“Perfect!” She smiles, reaching out to put her hand under yours. “The bandage looks fine. I don’t think it’ll reopen.” 

Nayeon had found time to change her clothes. She’s back to her usual farm girl outfit, smiling and happy. 

“Are you alright, Nayeon?” You ask, curious to know what a regular Follower made of what the fuck happened. 

She frowns, and then shrugs, and then smiles again. “I mean, it was, like, a bit scary. But Hongjoong made it go away, and he’s always with us, so it’s not like it can come back to hurt us. I was definitely scared at first, but then he showed up and I knew it would be okay.” 

“Uh-huh,” you nod, slowly. Nayeon has always been a valuable source of information for you. 

“It was just so valiant; do you remember how he saved you?” She giggles, “he still has it going for you. It’s amazing.” 

You shake your head. “I can’t say that I remember much…” Other than the fucking maw of emptiness. 

“Oh, well I got you.” She pulls up one of her rolling stools, sitting herself down right next to your bed. “So the ceremony went great. Textbook, really. But as it was finishing… I guess I’m not really sure how it happened, either. Like, one second everything was fine, and the next Yunho was on the ground— he’s fine, by the way; wind knocked out of him, but yeah, anyways— and the Guardian was there and everyone was screaming, it was so scary. I guess it grabbed you… and then Hongjoong appeared and it was like his presence just scared it away. I didn’t see what happened exactly… but the next thing I knew you were on the ground and Hongjoong was hollering for my help.” 

She shrugs. 

What you gather from that is that she didn’t see how it got there or how it left. Good signs, probably. She’d certainly remember seeing something… appear out of thin air. You almost want to smile. What a silly thought, that that could have all been real… haha… ha… yeah, funny…

“I see…” You respond, not sure what you’re supposed to say, “how much time has passed?” 

Nayeon looks at her watch, “like, three hours.” 

Great. Perfect, actually. It would be very unfortunate to find out that you had been unconscious for a week again, especially given the circumstances with Haseul. She’s probably already freaking out, but not hearing anything from you for a week… 

Is Hongjoong going to let you see her? After your brush with death? It wasn’t your fault that… whatever happened happened. Like, he planned that, not you. Surely he can’t hold this over your head. If anything, you basically almost just got kidnapped into a parallel universe, he should be treating you very kindly, right? 

Asshole. He’s probably going to bitch and moan for the next week about you not being scared of him. Fucking asshat. 

But… God, ugh, this is all so frustrating. On one hand, you’re pissed at him for, you don’t know, literally everything that he’s ever done to you, maybe? But on the other, you know that you’re going to have to play by his rules to get him to leave Haseul alone. Or, well, at least as alone as he can.

When is she going to have a Choosing ceremony, you wonder? Yours didn’t take very long… 

Well, if he doesn’t let you see her after this, at least you have that to… tentatively look forward to… ew, you don’t even want to be thinking like that. 

Nayeon stands at your side, bringing you back. 

You don’t realize why until you look behind her, only to spot Yunho standing near the doorway. 

He’s changed out of his clothes, thankfully. But just seeing him is enough to flood your mind with the thought of the thing, your stomach lurching over again as he welcomes himself into the room, clearing his throat. 

Nayeon pats his shoulder as she walks past him, excusing herself. Yunho stops at the foot of your bed. 

You have to admit that he might be one of the last people you would have expected to visit you, now. You had been thinking it before everything happened, but you don’t really think he has any lost love for you, given your circumstances with Mingi. 

“Thank you,” you break the silence, forcing the words out before you can think better of them, “for, uhm, trying to help me. And, I mean, actually helping me, too.” You can’t forget that he had kept you standing when the sacrifice was presented. How ruined is his coat?

He awkwardly looks at his hands, which are gripping the rail at the end of your bed. “Don’t mention it.” His voice is so meager that you barely can hear him. 

Yunho doesn’t look up. You’re not sure what else to say. So you speak without thinking, again. “How’s Mingi?” 

He peeks up at you, but then goes right back to staring down. “He’s… uhm, well, that’s what I wanted to talk to you about.” 

He pries his hands off of the rail, but then stares at them like he’s unsure that they’re even his hands. Tucking his hands behind his back, he continues, though he still doesn’t look straight at you, “I, uhm, yeah. Mingi is worried about you, and I think his worry came off the wrong way to you and San.” 

“Uh-huh,” you nod, slowly, and semi-sarcastically. You could’ve guessed that. “He has an interesting way of showing it.” 

Yunho takes a deep breath, “He doesn’t know that I’m here. I just thought that I would try and explain his side of things. From his perspective, he is the reason that you’re here and he feels guilty for that; but he’s also pissed that you’ve gotten close with San so quickly, because he doesn’t like him and he feels like you won’t take his concerns seriously.” 

“I don’t see what there is to be concerned about,” you plainly state, “do you have something against San, Yunho? Any reason at all to believe that Mingi could have reason to suspect that he’s not what he shows me?” 

Yunho startles when you say his name, like someone barely inhabiting their own body. “I mean, no. I think Mingi is probably just projecting his fear onto San, but don’t tell him I said that.” 

“Exactly. So why should I have to cater to Mingi’s ego?” The words sound harsh even as you say them, but its a genuine question. You don’t have much reason to believe that San would ever do anything to hurt you… besides him being someone that Hongjoong clearly trusts, but, like, you’ve been over that a million times before. 

Yunho just shrugs. “I don’t know. I just thought that maybe you would hear me out, since I know it’s hard for you to be alone with Mingi.” He stops his nervous fidgeting, finally looking directly at you. “I wasn’t nice to you because I harbor any sweetness towards you, for the record. I don’t even care that you’re the new object of Hongjoong’s affection. I only tried to help because I knew that, if I didn’t, Mingi would have.” His voice is harder than you’ve ever heard it; a shocking contrast to how he had been speaking just moments earlier. He maintains eye contact with you, his eyes dark. 

You’re the one to look away, this time, disturbed by what he said. What a very random and slightly disturbing thing to say. 

When you look back up at him, Yunho is already nervously looking around the room. His hands are in front of him again as he plays with his fingers. 

“Well,” you clear your throat, “thanks anyways, Yunho.” 

“Yep,” is all he says before leaving your room, basically running. 

… That was strange. Very strange. 

Nayeon doesn’t return. You’re left alone, puzzling over that entire interaction.

What… what was the point of that? Like, okay, sure you can get him wanting to try and vouch for Mingi. But… uhm??? The last part? What? Why was that so ominous? Huh? 

You had never known Yunho to be particularly timid… or… rude… This all is just very weird. Maybe even weirder than the fake demon situation. 

No, scratch that, definitely not any weirder than that. That one is gonna keep you awake for a while. A good while. But Yunho’s behavior was definitely not his usual, which is almost concerning. Almost… only because you suppose that you don’t really know him that well. Maybe he’s only really nice and outgoing to strangers… 

That wouldn’t make sense, either. 

Whatever, you really can’t be worrying about that right now. You have priorities. 

Priorities of which you would list, at least in your head, if San didn’t come barreling through the door the next moment. 

You startle, shocked by his sudden appearance. He’s changed, but he doesn’t look great. His hair is a mess, his lip is split, his shirt is untucked in places.

He reaches out for you, and you reach him halfway, grabbing his forearms as he grabs yours. Wordlessly, he looks over your face hastily, pressing his lips to yours before you can ask what happened. 

Your lips part, and he puts his forehead on yours. “We need to get out of here. As soon as possible.” 

← previous || next → || masterlist

[chim-chim1310]

Basically Jk was on live, and the live ended but all of a sudden, he came back on live and Jimin started commenting saying “I’m awake”. Ya’ll can’t convince that this wasn’t about the media coverage Jimin got in India and China about Hybe treatment over his album. A mutual of mine lives in India told me that media coverage were comparing Seven and Jimin’s album treatment and it’s like it was making Hybe look bad. I know ya’ll don’t want us to talk about this but I’m not buying any Jikook interactions. The last time Jimin commented on JK’s live, he told him to reduce the drinking on his live and Jk told him rudely to mind his business or something like that. Jimin just said okay, “Jk can do whatever he wants because he’s a grown man”. Jk then proceeded to make an instagram live with Tae and they started flirting. I remember Jimin receiving hate for that. A lot of Trashkookers started mocking him. And that was the last time Jimin had commented on his lives. Jimin likes Jk as his brother because he said Jk reminds him of his brother but I don’t think Jimin a very mature, smart guy can settle for someone so disrespectful and childish like Jk (that’s very disrespectful of people that think so low of him). Jk is very disrespectful that the members have also talked about it. Im glad his true colors are starting to show. We all know that Jimin is a very private guy that’s why to this day no one knows where he stays, He hasn’t been in any relationship scandal and yet Jk has been caught multiple times although the company denies (you can’t convince me that Jk didn’t have anything with the tattoo artist because those pictures of him back hugging her were so intimate but anyway that’ll be a conversation for another day). Jimin is very private that’s why he always does his lives from Hybe not his home. Why would a private and respectful guy like Jimin be flaunting his “gay” lover (Jk) everywhere. To the point of flirting with him when millions of their fans are watching. They know what the audience wants. I refused to be a shipper because I’m not easily manipulated. The way Jk is doing back to back lives lately trying to create a no boundary relationship between him and his fans is also a manipulative and calculated move. Now the whole fandom sees Jk as their best friend. I see some armies also saying that “This guy loves us so much that he even lets us see him almost naked in his bedroom”. I can’t stop but feel pity for them. Jk always said that they have to ask the company before doing lives because there has to be someone supervising, but he comes on lives like “rebel” telling us that what will the company do? Hybe knows that bts might not come back as a group and we all know that allegedly, three members haven’t signed the contract. Hybe wants Jk to be their pop boy and their next money making machine, what other way to do that if the fans and the Pop boy don’t have a Bff relationship? Now you can’t say nothing about Jk and don’t get death threats from armys. I saw someone making a whole ass video on TikTok wishing death to solos that attack Jk. Hybe also knows that this whole criticism Jk is getting is mainly because of LC, and to prove the fans wrong, we have to get Jikook interactions and many more are to come. Now whenever you try to criticize Hybe and Jk armies will say that but Jikook are besties they even flirt on live. Anyways these are all my opinions and thoughts. Ya’ll can celebrate Jikook interactions as you should but I’m not gonna do that. Jimin has always been happy, he’s been taking private trips and dinners with his friends. He was even in Jeju a few weeks back and Jk was busy chilling with Woonga. It’s not Jk that makes him happy. We all don’t know how truly he’s feeling because him being private, we’ll never know. No one in their right mind would be happy with all the things that have been going around. He worked days and nights for his album and a song that was just handed to Jk just comes all in the name of breaking all his records. I know he’s not happy about the situation and other members aren’t too.

Dude everything is not so black and white.

I understand your opinions but I think you don't wanna look at things in some other way than the narratives that you've created in your head.

There are so many things you've said that I don't agree on. You can have your opinion but I don't have to agree with it.

I heard about the article in India and China and honestly I was so happy. I hope this get more media coverage in other countries too. This bitch company, Hybe should be exposed.

Side note : Sorry but tkk insta live had chemistry?! Pffttt. What?! You call that chemistry?! Sorry I just had to laugh at that. That was the most bland live ever, Jk was more interested in bam, taehyung was just staring at the scene, they even talked about the weather at some point i think lol, the whole live, it was crickets.

I understand you don't wanna ship jikook, I don't anymore either but in order to not ship jikook you don't have to waste your brain cells into accepting that tkk ever had chemistry lol. I'm sorry i just had to say it. But it's ok it's your opinion what can I say.

Now back to the serious topic....

I agree with you about jk creating unhealthy para social relationship with fans. It's gonna backfire one day.

You're right hybe might try to show jikook agenda because of whole like crazy vs. seven thing. And I think that whatever they recorded in NY is the damage control you're talking about.

But I don't think this live is it.

It just seem very random and candid to me.

And if we go according to your damage control theory then why would jimin comment so enthusiastically? If hybe is doing something against jimin then why would jimin be an active participant in that? It doesn't make sense for jimin to comment if it's gonna harm him. You think jimin is that naive? Jimin was the one who commented and the comments didn't looked forced at all. He seemed cheeky, cute and flirty, he was having fun, I missed this jm so much. So no I don't think it was damage control. And if it was damage control then why would jimin cause harm to himself by actively participating in it?

To me it was just another one of jungkook's random lives at random times and jimin decided to comment on it because he felt like it. It's not that deep.

I know we are bitter towards jungkook but come on do we have to be so bitter about everything? I'm kinda tired of being so negative all the time. When jk or some other members say or do some stupid shit then we can call them out. Like we called out jk's recent interviews, yoongi's recent comment on jimin.

But I don't wanna make things up and then be negative about it. You can if you want to but please spare me from that. I'm kinda going for a positive vibe now. Let's please talk about good things until something big happens.

And for the last time anon, sometimes things are just not that deep.

Chill and learn to have fun.

Thank you.

[lfc21]

Till now and forever

Jordan was someone you loved from the minute you saw him, you couldn't think of a time when you didn't see him as the man of your dreams. From the minute you met him outside anfield to now, living together and having the most precious dog. Things had and will never changed.

Weddings where always something you liked, maybe it was the love in the air, the great food, or everyone just getting up and dancing you couldn't work out what it was that was so amazing but you knew that one day you wanted one of your own. Jordan had never been someone to speak highly of a wedding, there had been a few times where he admitted that he thought they where pointless which you couldn't lie hurt like nothing else knowing the one person you want to spend the rest of your life with finds it pointless.

"Oh y/n! Hiya" you heard behind your back as you reached inside the car to grab some cakes and snacks for the party. You quickly snapped your head behind you with a huge smile on your face. You always knew today was going to be a good day, your best friend could hold the most amazing parties.

"Hi! Just hang on one second" you say kicking the door shut as jordan comes out the other side of the huge range rover.

"Hello love you alright" jordan shouts over to y/f/n with a huge wave as he takes the trays of food from your hands with a tight smile. Y/f/n could tell something was different between you both, normally the pair of you couldn't keep of each other yet today was the opposite.

"Yeah im very well thanks are you?" Y/f/n replied ushering them into the kitchen once you had both got into the rather big house. Jordan walked over to kostas tsimikas sat outside on his phone knowing he had so much to tell him. Y/f/n and kostas had been together for a while now after meeting in Athens when she went on a girls trip and ended up staying there weeks longer than anyone else. You could say they hit it off.

"What's going on between you to by the way" y/f/n said pointing at kostas and Jordan through the window. You let out a breath you didn't know you where holding whilst adjusting your dress to make yourself look busy. You knew you had to tell her she would probably work it out anyway but telling her now just seemed nerve racking but you had to.

"He said something today which caused an absolute monster of an argument and I refuse to speak to him!" You shouted a little to loud knowing the lads outside will have heard your sudden outburst. Y/f/n snapped her head at you with a face of thunder she couldn't believe the two of you could of had that big of an argument to hold a grudge the whole way through a party yet to come.

"What did he say? That he was gonna smash your makeup?" Y/f/n shouted at you whilst placing the array of cakes on a plate ready to get outside with all the rest of food and drinks. You pushed your hands through your hair knowing your best friend was about to flip when she heard what he said.

"He said getting married is pointless" you blurted out looking at her as her face fell knowing damn well this was just the tip of the ice burg due to how well you know your best friend and how angry you know she gets.

"Do you know what I'm not even going to ask the rest because that is just awful on his behalf" you said walking out into the garden causing the two boys to look at you both from a far as they knew you where bitching about something.

"Oh trust me a few drinks down me tonight more will be said" you said helping to put out the food as far away from any bugs as physically possible because someone getting chased by a wasp in 30° heat with a hotdog was not going to attractive.

As the evening started to roll in everyone had arrived, music was blasting and drinks where flowing maybe a bit to much as James milner had found everything funny that occurred infront of him.

"Right come on everyone a game of most likely seems quite thrilling" virgil shouted coming out the patio doors into the garden watching everyone look at him as he stumbled out with the small box.

"Ooooooo yeah!!!!" Milner shouted whilst shoving a cake down his mouth knowing full well he would regret it in the morning as he wouldn't want to ruin his pure athletes body.

"Oh yeah maybe we will find some really interesting things out" you said staring at jordan as you where still far to angry at his comment about pointless weddings. Jordan tried to ignore your sarcastic comment until a very confused trent and robbo started to ask questions.

"Lad what's she talking about" trent whispered trying to cover his mouth avoiding any big arguments but it didn't go so well.

"Oh yeah jordan why don't you tell him" you replied with one hand resting on the side of your face as you stared at him waiting for a shitty version of the event to fly out of his mouth.

"Y/n come on let's not make it worst" perrie said placing her hand on your shoulder to calm you down.

"No im sorry but I cant pretend like this isnt bothering me!" You shouted looking at the boy opposite you. Trent and robbo had started to snigger knowing his pride and joy of a captain was about to be in the doghouse for slightly longer.

"Oh seriously y/n are you going to make a scene? Is that really your best move" jordan says standing up from his chair not believing what he's hearing from his girlfriend.

"Oh shit it's ww3" trents girlfriend said with a giggle as she walked out the patio doors into the evening sun. Your best friend quickly sniggered knowing full well that cheeky comment from trents girl had probably tickled you. You quickly slapped your hand onto your best friends thigh warning her that she needed to stay cool.

"Oh Jordan trust me once everyone knows what you said your going to be in the dog house with everyone not just me" you shouted back at him as the anger started to set in even more than before. You didn't want any of this to ruin the summer party but it was about to.

"Erm is it just me that wants to know what he said" Joel said with a laugh adjusting himself in the chair getting comfy for a reenactment of a scene from love island.

"I do!" Millie said throwing his hand in the air with a laugh waiting for someone to scream.

"Oh fucking hell! I said I think getting married is pointless" jordan blurted out sending the lads eyes to burst open knowing full well that's the exact thing you shouldn't say to your Mrs. Jordan had always seemed like the man who knew every right thing to say to a girl especially his own, he was the modern day cupid but now he was acting like the world's worst boyfriend, which infact he was.

"What!" All the girls who didn't know said in unison. You turned to them nodding your head as you knew they where about to be on your side.

"Oh lad that's so stupid" trent laughed behind his girlfriends back trying to cover his face so he wouldn't get a slap by his captain.

"I know it is! OK I know! But I weren't telling the truth infact it was the complete opposite! I was trying to get you to think it wasn't going to happen anytime soon because I wanted to propose today, you know whilst where all here. But now it's kind off ruined" jordan said walking over to you whilst taking your hand. You couldn't believe what you where hearing you had no idea this was the reality. Everyone's faces dropped knowing full well what was about to happen.

"Y/n will yo-"

"Oh fucking hell" virgil screamed as he tripped over the small step after the patio doors landing with a crash.

"Oh are you serious im trying to propose!" Jordan screamed sending everyone into a fit of laughter

[jiminrings]

i just reread ll (after seeing that yoongi pic on twt..... loml) AND UGH IM SO MAD AT THAT FIGHT WHY DID HE SAY THAT AND OH MY GOD WHERE IS OC SLEEPING OMG DID SHE STAY THE NIGHT AT TAEHYUNGS (not like that ..... nasties 😑) WHATS GOING ON. WHAT IS JUNGKOOK GONNA DO WHEN YOONGI OR SEOKJIN FIND HIM WHAT IF YOONGI KILLS HIM OR SMTH

cold senior!y/n x stem major!koo masterlist :D

you leave jungkook alone in your dorm after a fight — but at the same time, he gets left alone with yoongi and jin, who still aren't sure what to think of him especially now

aka part two of the ll couple's first fight

"i think i'm gonna crash."

seokjin yawns and says out loud without the knowledge that he's speaking out loud, his hands fumbling for the dorm keys amongst the numerous keychains he has a knack for collecting

"you drank one cup of coffee, jin," yoongi snorts because as far as he recalls two hours ago, jin even made him drink his remaining coffee because he couldn't take any more

yeah well sCREW jin for trying to stay awake the whole day alright!!!! he made a roadtrip out of scouring each individual part he wanted to add to his fancy PC setup he's been saving a pretty penny for

he doesn't say it at all but yoongi carries immense happiness in tagging along with errands even if it serves him no purpose <3 sometimes he just likes being a keychain to his best friends and he's happy!!

"yeah, hot coffee — the worst," jin elaborates his dislike for hot coffee even if both you and yoongi heard it a hundred times before

he's noisily trying to find the right key and he's surprised you haven't woken up and just oPENED the door for them, but he's cluelessly and thoroughly entertaining yoongi aka the guy who hAS his own key yet refuses to use just so that he could see his friend suffering some more

at this point, your neighbors probably think you’re getting robbed but thankfully jin finally manages to put in the right key, a satisfactory sigh leaving him when it finally clicks and turns the right way

the dorm is dark and noT dim like what they’re used to, probably something to be blamed to the hellfire of rain that’s going on outside

jin’s carelessly removing his shoes by his own feet, only stopping when yoongi harshly pinches him on the side before he does it to himselF on the inside of his arm

“ow! what was-“

he soothes the sore spot on his side because yoongi can reallyyyyyy put his two fingers close without pinching and therefore make it hurt even more, eyes all around the place before it stops on a familiar figure

a familiar figure, sure. welcome? not exactly.

"huh. you're still here? are you staying the night?"

seokjin asks out loud to jungkook who’s standing by himself beside the couch with his hands bunched, worried eyes fixed on them

"where's y/n?"

yoongi asks and it’s made evident how the both of them have different intentions to acquire for, but they all boil down to you nonetheless

jungkook’s throat dries because it hasn’t even been an hour that he’s left alone in yoor dorm, not expecting it either that your two friends would come home this quick

"that's the thing,” he mumbles and yoongi picks it up first, slithering around jin to confirm if he’s really hearing jungkook

what does he mEAN that’s the thing???

"y/n left."

jungkook’s with the two of them now but oddly enough, he doesn’t feel cornered even if the two of them are positioned as if they’re trapping him

he feels more alone than he is cornered, fresh tears stinging at the back of his eyes that he doesn’t want to show yoongi nor jin

"what did you just say?" yoongi asks more in confusion than in disbelief, narrowing his eyes at your boyfriend

"why would she leave at this hour and at this weather? not to mention, leave you alone with us."

jin raises a valid point to put into everyone’s head how bizarre the situation is and not to spook jungkook out, but it sounds like the latter to him which is why he snorts at the startled look

"calm down, kid. we're not gonna rough you up if that's what you're thinking," he reminds him because they’re not tHAT unhinged when it comes to you, walking to the refrigerator to down the nearest water bottle, ".... not unless??"

he still carries a playful edge to him because as much as he’s worried about you, atleast one of the three of them in this room should be far from having a breakdown to level the others

yoongi’s not done with his questioning streak because he presses further, sitting at the couch in your exact seat that makes jungkook gulp

god it’s now just hitting him that you left

"why did she leave?"

"w-we fought."

there’s slight hesitance in his tone because he’s not exactly surE if he should be telling that he fought with you to your friends, but he sets aside the possible consequences because after all, it’s you that they’re conversing about

yoongi nods to himself, having a hunch that the both of you must’ve fought and when he looks up at him, he only belatedly realizes that your boyfriend’s now blonde

"what did you do?"

he goes straight for it, startling jungkook

he’s not necessarily offended that yoongi asked him what he did because if you ask him, this is really aLL his fault

"i-i'll get to that but uh shouldn't we look for y/n first?"

...

..... okay that was understandable

yoongi knows where he’s coming from, nodding to acknowledge him

"not the first time this happened," he admits quietly and that leaves jungkook speechless, watching him intently which is why it made sense that yoongi’s not out of his mind panicking just like he is, "y/n left the dorm when she and seokjin fought."

yoongi says it even quieter and jungkook gets why, because as low as his mumble went, seokjin still managed to hear it

it must’ve been a sore spot that jin doesn’t want to tell him all about, atleast right now, because he looks down to his feet as if he’s been burnt

"it was a serious fight, but it was long ago,” he mumbles under his breath and the reminder of their fight which he’s tried to bury in the back of his head throws him off his feet slightly, “she doesn't really leave when it's just a petty fight or something."

yoongi somberly smiles at jin as some sort of apology for bringing it up, not wanting to put salt on the wounds as he just redirects his attention to jungkook

"i'm asking you for the last time, jungkook — what did you do?"

there’s no direct pressure behind his words but the three of them know that it would drastically help if he just said so

there’s no moral compass that he tries to steer because he himself wants to tell yoongi and jin, even if it means having to put the little respect and love they have for him on the line

jungkook doesn’t sugarcoat and retells all the way from what happened with the hoseok situation until he finishes with what happened merely an hour ago, almost scared to look up at the both of them

jin humorlessly chuckles and shakes his head to himself, still perched against the kitchen counter

"low fucking blow, kid."

surprisingly, yoongi became the lenient one

jungkook’s head aches because the two of them switched attitudes in a matter of minutes!!!! jin is the one that sounds like he hates being in the same room as him and yoongi is the one that tolerates hin generally

he could oNLY assume that the retelling of the events must’ve hit jin one way or another, somehow connected to what the two of you fought about long ago

yoongi takes the liberty to speak after jin’s remark, nudging jungkook by the knee to sit beside him

"y/n's hurt, of course, because as much as she had flings and casual fucks and whatnot," he trails around but doesn’t look to jungkook who’s wide-eyed thy he’s even letting him sit beside him, “you're her first boyfriend."

...

....

...... what

“i am?”

jungkook asks in confusion and the regret creeps up to him not a second later, the ringing in his ears blocking out the rain and even jin’s announcement that he’ll call you

he nods and kook knows that he’s not only saying this to pull at his tail, simply because he’s aware that yoongi doesn’t joke around with him

with jin entering his room to call you, that leaves him alone with yoongi and it barely registers in his head that this is the first time it’s only the two of them after that time when he threatened to give him a knuckle sandwich and the sort

"was starting to entertain and like the idea of you in y/n's life — our lives, y'know?"

yoongi initiates conversation and kook gets startled even more, tripping over his words because he can’t grasp at the situation fully

"i'm sorry, yoongi. i-i really am."

"hate to say this but," he clicks the roof of his mouth with his tongue, fiddling with his bracelets, "i know you are."

???

jungkook’s confusion at your friend’s words is what distracts him from his remorse, not believing his ears

yoongi believes him??? he knOws that he actually feels sorry for having done what he did??

"y/n doesn't like being accused, i think no one really does," he starts off carefully, “it's not my story to tell but it's for you to understand that y/n, y'know...."

jungkook swallows the lump on his throat for whatever yoongi’s gonna say next, a furrow in his brow as he chooses his words

“she doesn't come from a past wherein assurance is at face value,” he clears his throat, "that's all i can tell you."

jungkook nods and he tries to contain his thoughts because he doesn’t want to assume. he’s only gonna take what you give and he’ll willingly wait for that time you tell him all about his past

he does have a clue about your family because he asked that one time if he’d be meeting your parents because you’re a senior and you’re graduating soon, but you only shaked your head no and said “yoongs and jin are enough” for your ceremony

yoongi feels sorry, but he’s not sure for who :(

all he knows is that his heart aches, even if it’s for the boy in front of him that he swore he’d hate, but is now unconsciously worming his way into his heart

he’s no stranger to what jungkook feels because he felt the same type of territoriality and the insecurity that came along with it — the one he used to have over you, in that platonic soulmate sense he didn’t realize at the time

"it's not my place to tell you either, but sooner or later, insecurity will consume you, jungkook."

the guy in question nods eagerly because yoongi manages to address the struggle he has in his mind, acknowledging the issue at-hand fully

"y/n can't baby you forever,” yoongi sighs, “but you can't be ditched whenever she feels like it either."

:O

did...

did yoongi just take his side.....

jungkook kNOWS in the back of his head that yoongi’s neutral, but it all just registers in his head that for the first time, yoongi’s on his side, even in a sense

"talk it out. just sleep in her room for the meantime. fix it in the morning,” he starts to gather himself to stand, pausing to look at jungkook in the eye, "i'd hate to see my soulmate hurting."

the thing is, jungkook knows that yoongi’s your soulmate :-)

you told him that once and as much as you explained that it was only platonic, jungkook quickly understood it, much to your surprise

he knows he doesn’t know the entirety of you, but he knows that when he looks at yoongi, he’s looking at you too :)

yoongi gives him the ghost of a smile, making jungkook blink twice

"sooner or later, the two of us need to talk."

jungkook’s contented with that, smiling back at him

"good night, yoongi."

"good night, jungkook."

( ♡ )

ok.,.,.

“don’t come home, it’s pouring. or go back to your dorm, whatever. i don’t care.”

okay you dO in fact care!!!

it’s been more or less two hours since you left the dorm and you know this because jungkook’s been texting you without fail, only stopping twenty minutes ago that makes you look at the time

it’s 11 o’clock :O

either he’s asleep like he usually would be at this time, or he walked home

in fact, you don’t even know if jungkook is still at your dorm

your phone rings all of a sudden that it makes you flinch, scrambling to see who it was and you don’t know if it’s disappointment or relief coating you when you saw that it was jin

"and where is my favorite girl at this time of the night?"

you could only chuckle as you share a glance with the person whose dorm you crashed in, sending an eager greeting with his mouth full

"i'm at taehyung's. we're eating brownies right now."

when you knocked on tae’s door just two hours ago, the only thing he greeted you with was with a towel!!

he didn’t ask why you’re practically soaked in front of his doorstep because for whatever it is, it must probably be in good reason

truth be told, you didn’t even knOw where you were supposed to go but then tae popped into your head as the only sane person you know that would let you in at this time of the night without prior notice

it was a simple “jungkook and i fought.” to which he only nodded to, turned on the tv for you, and started baking brownies

"mhmm. what kind?"

you chew on the chocolate fudge, slightly chuckling at what jin’s insinuating

"the kind that doesn't leave you disoriented."

he hums at that and you could picture him swiveling on his gaming chair he bought just a week ago, his phone tucked to his ear closely

"the same kind that makes you able enough to come home tonight?"

"yeah,” you breathlessly agree, fiddling with the matching bracelet you have with jungkook, “same kind."

you could only assume now that they've seen jungkook and he's still saying there, all alone but with them

your heart warms at the thought that indirectly, jin’s making you come home to reunite you with jungkook, knowing that there’s an impending conversation sooner or later

"want me to pick you up? you'll get a cold."

"i'll borrow tae's umbrella. i'll come home when we finish the brownies."

the both of you know that it’s code for you just wanting a little more time before you come back, and also because you really wanna dO finish the brownies that tae warmly made for yoy

"mkay," jin smiled at your response, "i'll lock the door but just send me a text and i'll open it for you."

"won't you be sleeping?"

"i'll stay up. i'm not sleepy."

jin replies just as quick, a complete 180 to what he said when he initially came home that he wanted to crash because of the hot coffee he drank

you wordlessly thank him and he acknowledges it, happy to atleast know that you heeded his concern for you to come home tonight

"get home safe. love you."

it’s not only minutes later than you thank taehyung immensely and promise to take him to the aquarium as your thanks, finding yourself in your dorm that seokjin ushers you into with a peck on your head

you rush to your room and you’re greeted with the airconditioning turned on, seeing a lump beneath your comforter that you automatically know it’s jungkook sleeping

you're still damp from the rain but you change quickly to the first set of clothes you can grab from your drawers, not wasting a second longer

you sneak into your own bed, the same one that’s carrying jungkook

his sleep hasn’t even been the deepest and the moment he feels a shuffle beside him, he’s woken up immediately

“i’m here.”

jungkook realizes it’s you with the way your voice is soft and the way you hold his arm when you climb into the covers, wordlessly embracing him from behind

"i'm sorry. it's all my fault,” he says sincerely as he turns his body so he could face you, caging you in with his arm

"i'm sorry i stormed out on you."

he feels you nuzzle to the crook of his neck and it calms him down, the familiar scent of you enough to make his eyes close without fear

it only hits you now that this is the first time the two of you cuddle, much less share a bed

"love you."

it’s barely audible but it leaves you nonetheless, not expecting a reply in return but you get one anyways from a sleepy yet overwhelmingly-content jungkook

"i love you the most."

.

.

.

as always, lmk what you think!! i love answering asks :D what do you want to see from the lunchbox lovers next? send them here <3

[brelione]

Marriage (Preference)

 Rafe

Rafe just wants you to be happy

He’d probably let you plan the entire thing, nodding with a grin at every single thing you said.

But he needs chocolate covered strawberries.Its not an option.

He’d definitely need pep talks from Topper and Kelce

 “Im going to fall.”He muttered, worried about embarrassing himself in front of his father at his own wedding.

He ends up crying when he sees you in your dress though.He just cant help it.

Kiara

She’s been planning the wedding since the second date.She even had a pinterest board.

The fancy wine, the nice music, the fancy glasses.She had planned it all.

She even wore a bikini under her dress.It wasnt a huge ball gown, it was something simple that she had gotten from a thrift store and grabbed some fabric from a different store and customized it herself.

It had to be a beach wedding.It just had to be.

She just smiled as you walked towards her in your dress, looking over at Sarah. “Look how pretty my girl is.”She whispered, practically shaking with excitement.

JJ

He didnt want anything big, just big enough for friends and some of your family.He wanted to save the money that wouldve gone towards it for you guys to go on a trip to Hawaii.

Kiara and Sarah had helped you pick out your dress and Sarah even decided to pay for it.

You two had breakfast foods served at your wedding, leaving before it was even over to get on the plane for your trip.

But the sex on wedding night was mind blowing

The crashing of the waves at the beach house you were staying at, his big smile as he kissed you all over.It was perfect.

Sarah

Forest wedding, soft music, disney theme.

The dress code was literally to come as a character

Kiara came as Belle, JJ as Kristoff, John.B as Hercules and Pope as Black Panther because he had spent time to make his own suit.

Sarah’s dress was a soft pink like Aurora and yours was green and fluffy like Tiana’s to match the Forest theme.

John.B

Beer, a rented suit and a rented dress.

He managed to get a ring after working over time for a few months, taking you out on the boat after the ceremony to a small island he had found.

The two of you had a picnic on said island, drinking some beer and eating some cereal, laughing the whole time.

Barry

He never thought he would get married.Ever.

It wasnt really a wedding

It was more of him stealing you a ring, cooking you a nice dinner and receiving gifts from his brothers and his aunt.

But he knew that he was gonna spend the rest of his life with you and in his mind that was what marriage was about

So he just declared that you guys were married

Pope

He was a smiling mess the whole time, holding your hand and refusing to let go after the ceremony

He was even smiling when you got frosting all over his face, giggling and kissing you lightly

It was one of the few times he ever drank, taking a few sips of wine

“Hey, you get some good pussy tonight.”JJ patted him on the back.

Half the pictures were of his face buried in your hair or the crook of your neck, a smile on his face.

Topper

His mom wanted you to get married in a church

So of course you guys didnt get married in a church

It was somewhere on the beach, drinking champagne together and watching the sunset.You guys hadnt even told anyone, you just signed the papers and celebrated.

Kelce

The wedding was huge

He had to invite everyone he knew.His cousins, his aunts and uncles, his kindergarten best friend, his mail man, the guy who had brought him groceries once.He just wanted everyone to know.

The cake was huge too, at least nine tiers of candy flowers, fruit and whipped cream icing.

He just held you the whole night, arms around your waist or shoulders.

@nas-marie-loves-u​ @28cnn​ @sexytholland​  @yuxsh06   @ifilwtmfc  @cherryobx @poguestarkey @n1ghtsh4d3-67  @poguestyleskye @judayyyw  @sunwardsss @meaganjm @sarcasticsagittarius1998 @jj-fic-recs @homophobicclownmoviestan @jj-iz-bae @natalie-kate-98 @negativity4you @nxsmss @ofmaybankheart @broken-jj @joshy-obx  @curroptbunnie @outerbnx-stiles @angelreyesgirl100  @hannahhh-marie @sadnessrehab @purple-vodka-99 @annmariek8 @harryswigss @imagines-07 @pink-meringues   @popcrone818 @fttayla @cherryobx @drewstarkeyobx @jjtheangel @jj-iz-bae@sunwardsss    @natalie-kate-98 @nxsmss @broken-jj  @prejudic3  @outerbongs  @copper-boom  @httpstarkey @teenwaywardasgardian @drewswannabegirl  @simonsbluee   @jiaraendgame  @khiaraaa-in-spacee  @on-socks-off  @abbiesthings​ @kindahavefeelingskindaheartless @i-love-scott-mccall​ @poguestyleskye​  @jjtheangel @lovelyelinor @messuhp​ 

[wiener-soldiers]

the imperfect bubble - steve rogers

summary: y/n looks at bucky barnes like he’s the sun and the stars; bucky looks at y/n y/l/n like nothing more than his best friend. steve looks at peggy carter like she’s a divine angel; peggy looks at steve rogers like he’s nothing more than the remnants of a college romance. y/n looks at steve rogers like he’s a mirror; steve looks at y/n y/l/n like she’s the only person left that he can confide in.

words: 10.2k (you read that right)

warning: angst, unrequited love, the slowest slow burn you can possibly fathom, okay maybe not a slow burn but more like an oh shit that happened, minimal editing

a/n: im?? back?? i really enjoyed writing this one tho

masterlist | add yourself to the taglist! | faq

Leave your grievances at the door.

It was no longer an unspoken rule; when Steve and Bucky stepped into Y/N’s shared apartment with her college—and by association, their—friend’s Natasha and Wanda for movie night, they found the saying printed on the doormat inside their apartment.

It was a tradition that Steve, Bucky, and Y/N started their freshmen year of college. Steve and Bucky were best friends since childhood and have been through thick and thin together. So it was no surprise that despite the two attending different colleges, they still made it a habit to spend every waking moment together.

The two left their beloved Brooklyn to attend schools in Manhattan—Steve at Columbia pursuing his history degree and Bucky at NYU pursuing his engineering one. It was Steve’s turn to make the trip downtown and hang out with Bucky, but to his surprise, upon arriving at his dorm, he met eyes with a slightly wine-drunk girl hanging upside down Bucky’s bed while he tried to throw popcorn in his mouth.

It was quite the first impression, but Steve learned her name was Y/N, she went to NYU for journalism, and that she’d be sticking around a lot.

That night, instead of going out, Steve joined them in Bucky’s dorm, watching shitty Netflix reality shows, getting drunk on cheap wine, and their weekly tradition lived on ever since.

The doormat saying was one Y/N jokingly said to Bucky in their sophomore year of college. Y/N had moved into a new apartment in the East Village with Natasha and Wanda, two girls she bonded with over mutual hate for a certain TA. Despite Steve and Bucky’s place being decently big after deciding to move into a place together, the girl’s place was decidedly better decorated and more suited for movie nights.

Bucky had come in complaining about how a girl in his class flirted with him just to steal his notes and eventually best him during their midterms. Granted, it was a thrilling tale, but Y/N has jokingly told him to, “Leave you grievances at the door, Buck. This is movie night; we are going to chill and get drunk.”

The unspoken movie night rule stuck ever since.

So, when Steve and Bucky (now juniors) kicked their shoes off upon entering the girl’s apartment, the let out an audible laugh, alerting them that the muscle of the group was here.

“You like it?” Y/N calls out from the kitchen, followed by several ‘pops.’ The smell of buttery popcorn wafted through the air as the two followed the scent into the living room. Natasha was already occupying her seat on the couch. Wanda sat on the floor, in between her legs so to let Natasha braid her hair, as she scrolled through her Netflix queue for movies to watch.

“Looks great, doll,” Bucky smiled at her, giving her a kiss on the cheek. Steve notices a red blush crawl up her neck and smirks, sending the girl a wink. Y/N’s blush extends even further.

“Where’d you get it?” Bucky asks, sauntering into the living room and hopping over the back of the couch to land beside Nat.

Wanda giggles, “I custom ordered it on Etsy. I thought it would be funny.”

“You’re not wrong,” Natasha replies before the three of them fall into easy conversation about their weeks.

Steve stays behind the kitchen, observing Y/N as she observes Bucky. He smiles amusedly at her before saying, “I take it he still doesn’t know.”

Y/N rolls her eyes, “He didn’t know last week. He didn’t know last year. He didn’t know since we were seventeen. You think I’m gonna tell him now?”

Steve shrugs, routinely helping Y/N gather the snacks and drinks for their movie night, “I think you’d be cute together, s’all.”

“Yeah? Tell that to the man himself,” Y/N says sarcastically.

“You could always tell him,” he counters, “Guys find it hot when girls make the first move.”

“Whatever you say, pal.”

---

As it turns out, Steve was right. And as much as Y/N hates to admit it, Steve was right about most things.

A few months after some mutual pining, Peggy Carter, the hot British international student that’s studying political science at Columbia grew more balls than Bucky and Steve ever could and asked the latter out on a date.

Y/N liked Peggy. She had gorgeous brown hair that was somehow always perfectly curled, warm eyes, but always wore seductively red lipstick. She looked like a drug, and if she wasn’t dating Steve, Y/N was convinced that she would ask the woman out herself.

Steve had stumbled into the girl’s apartment after their first date. Peggy had taken him dancing in a place in the East Village that played swing music and turned a blind eye when college students with sketchy looking fake IDs ordered cocktails. It’s not like they could do much harm anyway, most college kids who went there hopeless romantics who want nothing more than to dance with their dates with a little liquid courage.

As opposed to hopping on the subway slightly tipsy and potentially falling asleep before he reached in Midtown, Steve stumbled into his friend’s apartment, tipsy and high on the drug that took form in Peggy Carter.

“Hiya,” Steve said with a dopey, crooked smile. Y/N, Wanda, and Nat looked between themselves and Steve with widened eyes.

There were red lipstick stains all over his face.

Natasha smirks at him, “Looks like you had a good time with the missus.”

Steve points at Y/N, his eyes slightly lidded from drowsiness, “I told you it was hot when girls make the first move.”

Y/N lets out a snort. “It’s hot when Peggy Carter does anything, Stevie.”

His enormous grin widens. “Well, you got that fucking right.”

The three girls collective gag at the picture of Steve defiling the girl as Steve rolls his eyes at them, plopping down on the grey IKEA couch the girls were occupying. The couch was a moving in present from him and Bucky and despite how cheap it looked, they refused to allow the girls to get rid of it. If they were being honest, the girls didn’t have the heart to do so anyway.

“Do you mind if I crash here tonight?” Steve mumbles into Y/N’s lap.

“I’m staying at my brother’s tonight anyway,” Wanda says as she reaches over and runs a hand amusedly through Steve’s hair, “You can take my bed if you want, Steve.”

“No, s’okay. I’m comfy here,” he says, voice muffled by Y/N’s thighs.

“You’re a big fucking baby, you know that?” Y/N jokingly says, slapping Steve’s back. He screeches an ‘ow’ but doesn’t move an inch.

Nat smiles at them. Before she met Y/N and Steve, she would’ve been convinced they were dating. But, her heart is just as full knowing the incredibly wholesome and healthy friendship the two share. She reaches down to stroke Steve’s head before saying, “Y/N, I’m gonna go ahead and use the bathroom first—you seem occupied. Goodnight Steve.”

“Nighty night, Nat,” he murmurs. With Wanda, then Natasha stroking his head, sleep comes a lot faster than he intends.

“Steve?” Y/N asks him. It was her turn to slowly stroke his head.

“Mmhmm?”

“Did you let Bucky know you were staying over?” she asks, Mom-mode activating.

She feels her thighs rumble with Steve’s laughter. “He’ll live,” he tells her.

“He’s your best friend, hon. You gotta keep him updating on this kinda stuff.”

“But you’re my best friend too,” he sighs sleepily and Y/N’s heart swells with pride.

The corner of her mouth quirks into a smile, “Really?”

“Yeah, ‘course you duffus. ‘Sides, he probably thinks ‘m getting laid or somethin’.”

“You’re gross.”

“Eh, you love me.”

She did indeed. She let him fall asleep like that with a slight smile on his face, thinking about how well his date went. Y/N slowly slide out from underneath Steve, placing a blanket on top of him. She placed a glass of water and a bottle of Tylenol on the coffee table for him when he woke, along with a sticky note saying:

Gonna be up early tomorrow, lover boy. Take whatever leftovers you want from the fridge. Also, invite Peggy to movie night :)

---

Per Y/N’s request, Steve did ask Peggy to come to movie night with him. To which, she excitedly agreed.

And against Steve’s assumptions, Y/N seemed more excited to have her over than he was.

Steve and Peggy entered the apartment hand in hand, with Steve carrying a takeout bag and Peggy nursing a bottle of white wine. Bucky trailed in behind them, carrying a pack of beers.

“They have a cute place,” Peggy comments, slipping her shoes off and following Steve into the living room.

“Don’t tell it to their face, though. One compliment and they’ll fall in love with you and you’ll never be allowed out of their sight again,” Bucky jokes from behind them, wandering into the kitchen to set the beer down.

Despite their five-person gathering being a six-person one that night, Peggy fit right in. Over cheesy horror movies, glasses of wine and swigs of beer, and copious amounts of takeout, the bombshell of a Brit felt very at home with Steve’s friends. To her surprise, none of them were jealous of her—Steve was incredibly attractive and the perfect guy, so she was sure it was impossible for him to have female friends without them throwing themselves at him.

She was wrong.

She really got a full understanding of their friendship—especially Steve’s friendship with Y/N—when she wandered down the hall to find more blankets. She heard two voices quietly discussing in someone’s room. She would’ve walked away because she didn’t want to eavesdrop until she heard her name.

“Peggy seems to be really enjoying herself.” She recognizes the voice to be Y/N’s.

“God, I hope so. Thanks again for inviting her.” Steve’s voice this time.

“You were the one who invited her, jackass,” she hears Y/N say sarcastically.

She hears Steve groan, “Don’t even start with that. What I meant was…thanks for giving her a chance.”

Softer this time, she hears Y/N say, “Steve, you’re my best friend. I didn’t like your other girlfriends because they seemed like shitty people. Peggy is…Peggy is good for you. Like, really good.”

“Okay now…” he laughs.

“No, I’m serious. If you didn’t ask her out, I was really fucking close to taking her for myself,” she finished before she hears a yelp followed by a soft thud and mattress springs squeaking. She can’t help herself and takes a peek inside the room to find Steve tickling Y/N on the bed. Peggy smiles to herself at the closeness of the friendship.

She’s about to walk away when she suddenly feels the feeling in the room shift.

“Steve, I think I’m gonna ask out Bucky.”

She hears an excited gasp, “Fucking finally! I’ve been saying you guys would be great together for years!”

She hears Y/N shush him, “He’s in the other room Steve, shut up!”

Peggy hears Steve laugh, “Sorry, sorry. Why now, though?”

“Dunno. I guess I just like seeing you happy with Peggy. And I don’t know, it makes me think that I deserve that happiness too,” Y/N says softly and Peggy’s heart melts.

“I’m proud of you, Y/N,” she hears Steve say. Despite not knowing Y/N that long, she’s proud of her too.

“Thanks, Steve.”

---

Y/N doesn’t get a chance to ask Bucky out.

As Y/N, Nat, and Wanda were preparing brownies for movie night when they got a text on their group chat:

Bucky: Can’t make it to movie night

Nat: got a hot date or smth?

Bucky: ;)

“Y/N…” Natasha calls out.

“Mhmm?” the girl calls out. “Gimme a second, I gotta take the brownies before they burn.”

Natasha sighs and walks into the kitchen to find Y/N gingerly setting the pan of brownies onto the counter. Wordlessly, Nat shows Y/N her phone with the group chat open.

The smile immediately falls from Y/N’s face.

“Y/N…” the red-head starts before getting vehemently cut off.

“I should be happy for him, right? My best friend just scored a date—”

“Y/N—”

“I was happy when Steve started going out with Peggy, why can’t I be happy Bucky found someone too—”

“Y/N!” Natasha says, more firmly this time.

“Why did you show me this, Nat?” she hisses, whipping her head and staring accusingly at her.

Natasha narrows her eyes at her, “You fucking know why. This was on the group chat, but I wanted to be there if you needed me when you saw it.”

Y/N’s eyes soften, “Nat, I’m sorry—”

Natasha cuts her off and immediately envelops her in a hug. “Don’t be,” she whispers, patting her head comfortingly, “You’re too good for Bucky, anyways.”

Y/N scoffs into her shoulder, “That’s my best friend, asshole. And Steve always said we’d be good together.”

“Steve has no fucking clue what he’s talking about.”

Y/N laughs a little harder, forcing the tears she was trying to keep in slowly stream down her face. Natasha immediately notices, and wipes them away with her thumbs, “Don’t cry, sweetheart. And don’t think about Bucky. ‘Sides, it’s movie night and—”

“—I need to leave my grievances at the door, yeah I know,” she finishes with a sad smile on her face. Y/N shakes her head, “That saying is kicking me in the ass, isn’t it?”

Ten minutes later, Wanda emerges from the bathroom, screeching in frustration from Bucky’s texts in the group chat. Y/N tries her best to tell Wanda that she’s over it, but Wanda is strangely good at reading people (it doesn’t help that she’s also a psychology major). The girls usually love Wanda’s weird sixth sense, but Y/N couldn’t help but find it quite inconvenient at this very moment.

Half an hour after that, Steve arrives at the girls’ apartment, this time without Peggy. The first thing he does is wrap Y/N in a bear hug, despite her protests at everyone making a big deal out of it. Steve doesn’t care, only hugs her tighter.

The four of them huddle around the TV, watching whatever movie was next on their queue and catching up on life. They tried really hard to ignore the awkward tension and the lack of the Bucky-ness the group had. It was movie night, after all. The perfect bubble that was their movie night felt a little different than it normally had.

---

Bucky misses movie nights for the next few weeks.

With the end of junior year approaching, the group of friends rarely had time to socialize outside their study groups except for their weekly tradition. With Bucky gone doing whatever Bucky was doing, Y/N didn’t see him for weeks on end. The only interaction they had was the occasional meme being sent to the group chat or like on Instagram.

She missed him. But deep down inside of her, she wasn’t that all surprised.

What did surprise her was Bucky’s sudden appearance at their last movie night before the end of junior year.

They were halfway through their first movie—Wanda was teaching Peggy how to braid a flower crown, Steve had agreed to let Natasha paint his nails a red and blue ombre while he played a game of Connect Four with Y/N, all while a random movie played on the screen—when they heard the front door unlock.

“Sorry I’m late!” called a voice. It was distinctly Bucky’s, but the female giggle that followed was not.

Bucky and an unnamed blonde materialize in the living room and everyone looks at the pair in shock. Y/N could feel a few of her friend’s stares be redirected to her, but she can’t seem to overt her eyes from the blonde.

Her hair seemed like it was literally golden as it flows down her light-green sundress. She was wrapped around Bucky’s arm—the arm with his tattoo sleeve on it, the arm that she loved tracing the patterns of the tattoo with during movie night.

Peggy breaks the ice first, “Hi, Bucky.”

“Oh, you have an accent!” the blonde squeals and Y/N can feel her eyes roll. Wanda scoffs beside her.

“Bucky, can I talk to you for a sec?” Y/N asks, more like demands, as she stands up abruptly and walks briskly past Bucky towards the hall, away from the view of the living room.

Once they were out of earshot from their friends, she hisses, “What are you doing here?”

Bucky laughs almost mockingly, “What do you mean, ‘what am I doing here?, It’s movie night, isn’t it?”

Y/N sighs tiredly, “Bucky, we haven’t seen you for weeks. Then, you show up with some blonde girl that we’ve never met?”

“I’ve been busy. What, am I not allowed to be busy anymore? The world doesn’t revolve around movie night,” Bucky snarls at her.

“Oh for fuck’s sake, that’s not what I meant and you fucking know it,” she growls back. “You’ve been radio silent for weeks—you pretty much ghosted all of us. Hell, if it wasn’t for Steve living with you, we would’ve thought you were fucking dead! But we gave you space because we aren’t helicopter-friends. But then, you show up after ignoring us for weeks with some chick I’ve never seen before at my fucking house on fucking movie night?! Can you see why I’m a little pissed off right now?”

“The British chick is here! Why the hell can she be here but not Dolores?” Bucky bites back, his voice rising.

“Because Peggy was invited to my house and Dolores fucking wasn’t!” Y/N says aggressively, her voice nearing a shout.

“This isn’t your tradition, Y/N. You want to control everything about this friend group and trust me, sweetheart, we’re all getting sick of it.”

“Oh, you can’t fucking do that.”

“Do what?”

“Talk like you’re still a fucking part of this friend group.”

“What, you’re gonna kick me out of your clique because I’ve been busy? Because I have a life?”

“No, because you’ve been a shitty fucking friend!” Y/N shouts, chest heaving, and face red.

Bucky’s eyes widen in shock. Sure, they’ve had points in their friendship where they haven’t communicated in a few days, but never this long. And Y/N had most certainly never been this angry with him before.

That seemed to knock some sense back into him. “Y/N—”

“Get the fuck out, Bucky.”

“Wha—”

“I said get out,” she says, eerily quiet.

So, he did. Bucky stormed out of the hallway and grabbed Dolores before marching out of the apartment. When Y/N sat back down with the rest of their friends, she could feel their stares burning into her face, but all she did was reach for the remote and continue playing the movie.

---

After Y/N’s argument with Bucky, he stops showing up game nights. They even make a new group chat without Bucky in it (because apparently, kicking him out of the apartment was fine but kicking him out of the group chat was too mean). Despite not really knowing what exactly was said, everyone understood what happened that night. To be frank, they were all waiting for someone to snap. A confrontation with him was long overdue.

The friend group is different without Bucky’s presence. Not better, not worse, just different.

It was clear that there would be awkward tension among the friends immediately after the argument. Wanda and Nat immediately sided with Y/N and clearly wanted nothing to do with Bucky. Steve was a trickier subject. Wanda, Nat, and Y/N all understood that they couldn’t force Steve not to be friends with him, so they all accepted him as their neutral party.

After a few months, their different was starting to feel normal.

But Y/N still missed Bucky. Despite her years of pining, Bucky was still her best friend. He was still the guy who walked her to her morning lectures after his run and got her wine drunk after a guy rejected her. Y/N missed that version of Bucky—she just wasn’t sure if he existed anymore.

Based on periodic updates that Steve gives her, Bucky is still with Dolores. “He’s happy,” Steve tells her. “Different, but happy.”

After a few months of living without Bucky in her life, she starts to blame herself. Had she been overreacting? Most probably. Did she really need to kick him out of her apartment? No.

“Was what you did justified though? Definitely,” Steve would always remind her. Some days she believes him, some days she doesn’t.

Still, her life begins to reach some semblance of normal. Movie nights are still once a week, but they’ve changed from a place where they have pseudo-therapy sessions lead by Wanda while a cheesy movie plays in the background.

It was about halfway into their senior year when Steve drops something on them during one of their movie night conversations.

“I might move to London,” Steve says out of the blue.

“What?” Y/N turns to him in shock.

Steve stares blankly at his lap, fidgeting with the nearly empty glass of red wine. “Peggy wants to move back to London after we graduate,” he says softly. “She wants me to go with her.”

It was Wanda’s turn to ask, “Well, why doesn’t she stay here with you?”

“Her family’s in London.”

“And your family is here, Steve,” Y/N replies softly, “We’re here.”

Steve sighs and runs a hand over his face before releasing a frustrated cry, “I don’t know what to do, guys.”

Natasha looks at him sympathetically before grasping his hand tightly, “Have you talked to Bucky about this?”

“Not yet…he’s got a lot on his plate right now,” Steve starts, warily looking at the girls sitting around him.

“What do you mean?” Natasha presses.

“Bucky proposed to Dolores a few days ago…” Steve sighs.

“Well…” Y/N starts, trying to find the right words, “Congrats to them.”

“Yeah,” Steve replies lamely before downing the remainder of his red wine. “I love Peggy, I really do,” Steve starts, “but I don’t know if London is right for me.”

Y/N raises an eyebrow at him, “What do you mean?”

Steve sighs again, “I don’t know how to explain it but…lately it feels like our relationship isn’t real anymore⁠—like she’s using me as a prop. It feels like she’s dragging me along because she feels like she has to. I really do love her but going to London with her just doesn’t feel right.”

“And what does feel right, Steve?” Wanda asks him gently.

Steve answer in a heartbeat, “New York. With you guys.”

Y/N offers him her kindest eyes. She murmurs softly, “Steve, I think you have your answer then.”

---

Steve stayed in New York.

He was a little heartbroken by Peggy’s reaction though; she simply acknowledged him and went straight back to packing, not even bothering to fight for their relationship. Maybe there wasn’t a whole lot to fight for after all.

Bucky also married Dolores.

After their graduation, Bucky and Dolores eloped. They didn’t want the pressure of an actual wedding, so they got on a flight to Vegas and got hitched in their graduation gowns. The reassured everyone (especially their parents) that they would have a real wedding for everyone else afterwards.

Y/N, Wanda, and Natasha finally got their own places. Wanda was moving in with her brother, Pietro, into an apartment in Morningside Heights. They were both starting their master’s at Columbia (Wanda in psychology and Pietro in exercise physiology), so they wanted to live closer together. Natasha was finally moving in with her boyfriend, Bruce. They were a very private couple, so they weren’t at all surprised when they told them that they were moving into their own place in Park Slope, close to Bruce’s research job and Nat’s marketing firm.

Y/N was really close to downsizing to a studio when Steve rolled his eyes and told her, “Don’t be an idiot, I’ll move in with you. That place is too nice to give up. Besides, Bucky and Dolores are looking for a place to move into.”

So, what was once Y/N, Wanda, and Nat’s apartment was now Y/N and Steve’s.

Not much changed about the apartment: Y/N kept her old room and Steve moved into Wanda’s. Natasha’s room had the most natural light, so they turned it into an office. Steve, Y/N learned, was the ideal roommate—his stuff was never messy, he helped run errands, and he was a delight to be around.

If it was possible for the two best friends to get any closer, they did.

Y/N fell into an easy routine with Steve, almost like it was second nature. After both taking the summer off, Steve started his law degree at Columbia and Y/N started her job as a Staff Writer at the New York Times. 

They woke up at around seven and Steve got started on breakfast while Y/N used the bathroom first. As soon as she got out, breakfast would be waiting for her, so she got started on making coffee for her and Steve. Steve didn’t usually take long in the bathroom, so they ate breakfast together, enjoying each other’s company before their day started. After they both got dressed, they both walked to the subway and rode the L train before they had to split ways: Steve Uptown to Columbia and Y/N to the New York Times building. Steve usually got out of classes first, so he usually ran some errands for the place or studied in a café in the Village somewhere so to let Y/N get home before he did. She loved making dinner, so Steve usually came home to her blasting music and cooking.

The funniest part about their arrangement is that it was barely an arrangement: they didn’t really agree on splitting up their day this way. It just sort of…happened. It was natural but it felt right to the both of them and that’s all they could ever ask for.

The arbitrary lines of being roommates slowly began disappearing as well. 

Four months into living together, Y/N and Steve started sharing a bed.

It wasn’t romantic, but more like a necessity. Steve had walked by Y/N’s room when he heard slight whimpering. He immediately swung open the door and found her lying on her bed, clutching her stomach in pain with tears streaming down her face.

Steve immediately lost his composure, “Y/N? Are you okay?!”

“It fucking hurts Steve,” she mumbles, “Why does bleeding out of your vagina fucking hurt so much?”

Steve’s eyes immediately soften and he lets out a low hum, “Y/N, I thought you were dying.”

“I am dying. This heat pad isn’t doing shit!”

Steve laughs and makes his way to the bed, lifting the covers and sliding beside her. Y/N immediately shifts so that Steve can be more comfortable. He wraps his arms around her, making sure to put his palm flat on her stomach. In the mess of tangled limbs, they fall asleep like that and take the most relaxing nap of their lives.

Steve shares a bed Y/N that night. And the night after that. And the night after that.

Soon, Steve barely slept in his old room anymore. It got to a point where it didn’t even make sense for him to have his own room: Y/N’s room was bigger, closer to the bathroom, had a comfier bed, and Y/N was in it.

The two spend a weekend clearing out Steve’s new room and moving all his stuff into Y/N’s. They turn they put the grey IKEA pullout couch inside along with an array of painting supplies and camera equipment, effectively turning it into a home studio. They like the apartment better this way.

A few months later, the two get a dog together. The mini Australian Shepard has a gorgeous coat, different coloured eyes, and a scar that stretches across his face, a reminder as to why they rescued him in the first place. The renamed him Mando (because his face reminded them of the Mandalorian helmet) and he was like their child. He was full of energy, so Steve loved brining him along for runs in the park. But he was also quiet, reserved, and sensitive so Y/N adored cuddling with him on the couch.

It was their own little family. Steve, Y/N, and Mando.

Movie nights were still a weekly occurrence, but it wasn’t always at their place anymore. Almost six months after Steve moved in with Y/N, they hosted movie night at their place again.

It wasn’t as if Wanda and Natasha hadn’t seen Y/N and Steve since then, but it was the first time they really felt the changes in their old place.

“You redecorated,” Nat commented with a smile. She noticed there were more pictures up: some of their entire friend group, some of just Y/N and Steve. There was also a hanging shelf above the TV (something that Y/N had always talked about installing but never did) that housed some pottery and other knick-knacks Y/N and Steve have collected over the years.

Wanda notices the dog crate and bed in the corner of the living room, along with a basket of toys for the dog. She asks, “Where’s Mando?”

“Steve took him when he went to get the takeout. He likes to cuddle if that’s what you’re asking, Wanda,” Y/N answers amusedly.

“Whathcu do with our old rooms?” Nat hums as she takes a seat on their new couch. She wondered where the grey IKEA one went; it was unlikely that Y/N had the heart to throw it away.

Y/N sits down beside her holding three wine glasses and a bottle of red wine. She pops the cork and pours them all a drink before saying, “We turned your old room into an office and Wanda’s into an art studio slash guest bedroom. That’s where the grey pullout went.” Y/N finished her sentence absentmindedly, almost like she didn’t realize the implication she made.

Wanda and Nat smirk at each other.

Nat takes a sip of her wine before nonchalantly saying, “You know, I always knew you and Steve would end up together.”

Y/N chokes on her wine, “I’m sorry…what?”

Wanda chuckles at her, “You live together, you share a bed, you got a dog.”

Y/N hums nervously, “We’re not dating.”

“Seems like you’re already married if you ask me,” Wanda counters with a smirk.

Before Y/N could get any more embarrassed, the front door opened and Mando came bolting inside, followed by Steve who laughed as the dog jumped on the couch and licked its occupants.

“Oh, Mando you’re so cute,” Wanda gushed before she immediately became occupied and played with Mando.

Natasha looked on with a knowing smirk as Y/N watched Steve approach, both wearing matching smiles, and Steve presses a kiss on her forehead.

“I got Lo Mein if that’s okay. I tried to make it to the pizza place, but I guess Mando likes the smell of Chinese,” Steve says quietly to her before setting the takeout on the coffee table beside the glasses of wine.

She smiles at him, “That’s okay, thanks for grabbing it anyways.”

“I figured you wanted time with the girls to catch up,” Steve shrugs before hopping over the back of the couch to sit next to you.

As the movie started and everyone started eating their serving of food and wine, Y/N assumed the natural position of leaning against Steve’s chest with his arm thrown around the back of the couch. The smell of his cologne is so synonymous with safety to Y/N, so she naturally leans closer to him.

Halfway through the first movie, Y/N catches Nat staring at her and Steve with a smirk. Nat sends a wink her way which sends Y/N’s face in a red flush.

She averts her eyes and looks back at the movie. We are not dating, Y/N thinks to herself, this is just natural.

---

It was about a year after Y/N and Steve started living together when they both got invitations to Bucky and Dolores' wedding.

Their group chat was blowing up with questions like ‘should we even go to the wedding?’ and ‘won’t it be awkward for everyone involved?’

Steve already knew that he was going. Despite everything, Bucky was still like his brother. They still saw each other almost weekly and although he wasn’t Dolores’ biggest fan just through negative association, he was happy that Bucky was immensely happy.

Y/N, on the other hand, needed more convincing.

“Jesus, I wish he never invited me to his goddamn wedding,” Y/N complained, her head buried in Steve’s shoulder as they sat on the couch, “Is this his version of a punishment? The anxiety of choosing whether or not I should come to his wedding?”

Steve rubbed her shoulder comfortingly, “Y/N, he did use to be your best friend.”

“Before I told him to get out of my life and that I never wanted to see him again,” she states bluntly. “God, I was so fucking stupid.”

“Hey,” Steve says firmly, “The both of you were acting pretty stupid, we’ve established that. But you’ve grown up. Bucky did invite you, which means he wants you to come.”

Y/N stays silent as Steve continues, “I know you miss him, Y/N. And clearly, he misses you too. Maybe this is your first step at mending your friendship.”

“If there’s anything left of it,” Y/N says pathetically.

“You won’t know if you don’t go to the wedding.”

So, she ends up going to the wedding.

The actual ceremony went by in a blur. Dolores was wearing a beautiful gown with gorgeous floral lace and Bucky in a wonderfully fitted velvet suit. Y/N thought the first time she would see Bucky in years would be filled with melancholy, but Y/N just felt better that Steve (from beside the groom) was sending her reassuring smiles the entire ceremony.

The couple was technically already married, so they didn’t have a licensed officiant. Instead, they had an array of friends, including Steve, the best man, say different parts of the pre-made script. It was fun, lighthearted, and had Bucky written all over it—something that Y/N missed about him the most.

At the reception, she took advantage of the open bar. She spent her time socializing with Natasha, Wanda, and Sam, a mutual friend who became an Air Force officer straight out of college. The night was still young, so Steve spent most of his time with the wedding party, occasionally sending Y/N texts like:

Steve: Miss you!

Steve: How many drinks have you had so far?

Steve: You made sure to lock Mando’s crate, right?

Steve: Did I tell you that you looked rlly pretty tonight?

Steve: I can’t wait until everyone gets drunk so I can hang out w you :)

“Texting at my wedding? I thought you loved parties, Y/N,” a recognizable voice says amusedly.

Y/N’s head snaps up and she’s met with a face that she hasn’t seen in years.

“Bucky—”

Bucky cuts her off, “Before you say anything, I’m sorry. You were right, I was being a really shitty friend and I didn’t have the right to ignore you, yell at you, or just bring random people into your home like I owned the place. I just…really missed you. You’re my best friend and my life hasn’t really been the same without you.”

Y/N is rendered speechless. Her mind blanks as she stares into Bucky’s watery eyes, begging for forgiveness. She says nothing and instead wraps her arms around Bucky, pulling him close. The man immediately wraps his arms around her like they’ve never left.

After the wedding, Bucky starts to show up to movie night again.

It takes a whole lot of coaxing to let Natasha and Wanda allow Bucky back into their lives, but eventually, they come around. It wasn’t like college though, but it was nice, nonetheless. One night, Bucky revealed that movie nights are when he feels the most like himself again. The rest of them smile wordlessly at him, but confusion does seep into the back of their minds.

A year since the wedding, the group finally fully accepts Bucky back into their lives as if he never left. He catches up with Natasha during impromptu lunches, takes Wanda to dinner if she’s ever in Midtown, watches the Yankees play with Steve to take his mind off of law school, and drops lunch off to Y/N at the New York Times building if he’s in the area.

Bucky truly misses his friends, but somewhere deep in his heart, he misses Y/N a little bit more.

The rest of them also notice how little Bucky talks about Dolores when they’re together.

They found it strange at first; normally, husbands loved talking about their wives. But Bucky never brought her to their outings, to movie night (despite everyone insisting that they’d be happy to have her over), and rarely brought her up in conversation unless asked.

Y/N found it especially strange. In a mature attempt to move on from her college crush on Bucky, she tried to make amends with Dolores. Turns out, the blonde was an adorable girl from Brooklyn that absolutely adores Bucky. She’s sensitive but hilarious and Y/N loves spending time with her.

She also noticed how much Dolores talked about Bucky. It was clear how much she adored him, so it was almost unfathomable to her how Bucky didn’t talk about the wonderful woman nearly as much as she talked about him.

“Don’t you find it a little weird?” Y/N asked him as he was brushing his teeth. Steve was concentrated on her face despite toothpaste foaming around his mouth. Y/N sat on the bathroom counter, feet swinging as she absentmindedly played with an elastic.

Steve spit in the sink before speaking, “I mean, you know Buck. He’s a pretty private guy.”

“Yeah, but he doesn’t shut up about crazy stories he’s had with you and Bucky loves you. I just find it a little funky that he doesn’t act the same with Dolores,” Y/N explained.

Steve sighs and gargles the rest of the toothpaste out of his mouth. “I guess I never thought about it that way… They have only been married for a little over two years though. Maybe they’re still figuring out the ropes of their marriage?”

Y/N shrugs with a sigh, hopping off the counter and stripping off her shirt and pants. Steve tries his hardest not to stare but he can’t help but stare at the curve of her body as she reaches to slip on one of his hoodies she likes to wear for bed.

Steve isn’t really sure where his relationship with Y/N stands, to be honest. It’s funny to him—they act like an actual married couple, minus the romance. Acting domesticated with her just feels so natural to Steve, but he’s scared putting a label on anything will change the dynamic, so he stays silent and cherishes the domestic moments he has with her.

“You’re right, I’m probably overthinking it,” Y/N mumbles before slipping past him, “I’m headed off to bed. Don’t take too long.”

Y/N doesn’t notice Steve’s hard blush as he scrambles to put on some pyjamas to join her in bed.

---

“I’m nervous.”

“Jesus, Steve. You’ll be fine! You’re the top of your class at fucking Columbia, so there’s no way you failed the bar,” Y/N cheers on excitedly from behind him. She rubs his shoulders as he stares at his inbox, too afraid to click on the email titled ‘New York State Bar Exam Results.’

Steve’s foot taps incessantly, “I’m still too scared to look.”

Y/N reaches over his shoulder and kisses his cheek. “Fine,” she says, “I’ll look for you.” She clicks on the email and scrolls down, searching for Steve’s exam number.

After a few seconds, Y/N hesitantly asks, “Steve?”

“Mhmm?” he replies, his head in his hands.

“What’s your exam number again?”

“S-24601,” he replies quickly.

Y/N squeals and hugs him from the back, pressing kisses all over his neck. “You fucking passed, Steve!” she squeals.

“I did?!”

“Of course you did, dummy!”

Steve laughs in excitement and disbelief, grabbing Y/N by the waist and spinning her off the ground. Mando barks excitedly, jumping up happily against Steve’s thighs.

“You did it!” Y/N smiles down at him, her cheeks hurting from all her laughing.

The two celebrate by hosting movie night at their place with extra food, desserts, and ridiculous amounts of alcohol. Wanda brings Vis, the high school chemistry teacher she’s been seeing, Nat brings Bruce, and Bucky finally comes around and brings Dolores along for the celebration. Even Sam, who happened to be off duty, was able to come to the celebration.

Despite it technically being movie night, most of the night was spent trading funny stories about Steve, emptying bottles and bottles of wine and beer, and finally letting loose for the first time in a long time.

Around ten in the evening, the board games came out and the group of twenty-somethings started playing games with a drinking twist. Y/N had been attached to Steve by the hip all night (largely because he always seemed to have his arms around her), but she couldn’t complain. The several glasses of wine she had did make it easier for her to ignore Wanda and Natasha’s smirks.

It also made it easier for her to be ignorant of how awkward Dolores felt at the gathering. Y/N sincerely like the girl, but she was unaware of her discomfort until around one in the morning. Most people had left, and it was just Steve, Y/N, and Bucky cleaning up.

“Y/N, I’m gonna take a quick shower,” Steve calls out to Y/N as she washes the dishes with Bucky picking up trash in the living room. “Goodnight Bucky!” Steve calls out before disappearing.

“Goodnight, Steve,” Bucky shouts back before walking into the kitchen. He leans against the counter and watches Y/N as she does the dishes. Y/N notices his presence, then notices the lack of someone else’s presence.

“Hey Buck, where’d Dolores run off to?” Y/N hums, drying the last of the dishes.

Bucky shrugs, “Took an Uber and went home early.”

Y/N turns around to face him, “Shit, Buck. You didn’t have to stay—”

“Nah, I wanted to. She’s probably fine,” he answers nonchalantly.

“Probably?”

Bucky doesn’t respond.

Y/N takes a deep breath and fiddles with the dishtowel in her hands before saying, “Bucky, why is this the first time in three years of marriage that Dolores has come to a friend get together?”

Bucky’s jaw unhinges a little, “What do you mean?”

Y/N sighs and sets the dish towel down. She takes a deep breath before saying, “We’ve asked you to invite her to come over for years, but you always make excuses for her. You don’t nearly talk about her as much as she does about you, and I know that for a fact because I’ve hung out with Dolores on multiple occasions. Bucky…is everything alright between you and Dolores?”

Bucky stares intently at her for a few seconds before his resolve crumbles. His eyes lose its intensity and are replaced with tiredness as he drags his hand across his face. “Dot and I…” Bucky starts, “are going through a bit of a…rough patch.”

“Bucky—”

“I made a mistake marrying her,” he says bluntly.

“What?” Y/N says in shock. Every time she’s spent time with Dolores, she had been nothing but lovely. She’s perfect for Bucky—she doesn’t understand where he’s coming from.

“I love Dolores but I…”

“But…?”

Bucky doesn’t say anything. Instead, he crosses the kitchen floor in two long strides and grabs Y/N by the face, kissing her fiercely.

Y/N freezes and her eyes widen in shock. What the fuck was happening? was the only thing her brain could possibly register at the point.

Bucky pulls away but the grip on her face doesn’t fade, “But I’m in love with you, Y/N. And I know for a fact that you love me too.”

He leans in for another kiss, but Y/N pushes him away. “Bucky stop!” she says, harsher than she intends, but she doesn’t regret it.

Bucky stares at her, dumbfounded, but she continues, “That was a long, long time ago. And Jesus, Bucky you’re married!”

He shakes his head, “I don’t need to be forever—”

“—And you’re drunk!” she explains in exasperation.

“But I know some part of you still loves me. And God, I love you too. All those years without you and it finally got through to my thick skull,” Bucky argues.

“But what about Dolores?” she whispers.

“Fuck Dolores,” he says. Bucky reaches for her again, but Y/N steps away.

“Bucky, I can’t,” Y/N cries. “Maybe there’s some part of me that loves you, that may always love you. But there’s a bigger part of me that loves what I have right now. Bucky, I’ve never felt so safe before. So happy, so cared for, so loved. I know it’s selfish, but I can’t give away the happiness and security that I deserve to explore what my life would be like with you because I love—”

Y/N stops abruptly, her voice catching in her throat.

“Because you love who, Y/N?” Bucky asks. She notices how his eyes have become glassy and how his shoulders had slumped slightly.

Because I love Steve, Y/N thinks. But she doesn’t find the courage to say it. Bucky can see it in her eyes, though.

“It’s him, isn’t it?” Bucky doesn’t have to say his name who she’s talking about.

Y/N is silent, her heart thumping so loud her she’s afraid Bucky can hear it.

Her silence is enough for him, “Ah.”

Bucky waits a few more seconds before saying, “When did you know?”

Y/N gulps and lets out a shaky breath. When did she know? She racks her brain but can’t think of a specific time. Part of her thinks that she always knew. She was so natural around Steve. So safe and carefree. Steve was there when that perfect bubble of her friendship with Bucky popped, and he even stayed with her after. He was the one that helped her mend her heart and, in the process, built himself a spot inside without even realizing it. Her imperfect bubble, her lens of the world, may have been broken, but Steve was inside, and Y/N knew that it’s all the really mattered.

I love Steve, she confessed to herself. She felt like she was Cher in Clueless, with the fountain of her emotions erupting inside her. Bucky could clearly see it on her face as he smiled sadly.

“Did I ever have a chance?” he whispers.

“Yeah... A long time ago,” Y/N answers softly, not trusting her voice.

“Will I ever get the chance again?”

Y/N shakes her head softly, “Don’t wait for me, Bucky.”

Bucky smiles sadly at her, a tear escaping his eye. She reaches for him, but Bucky shakes his head, “See you around, Y/N.”

And just like that, he’s gone.

Y/N feels like she’s on autopilot. Adrenaline is still coursing through her system; coupled with alcohol and a whole lot of courage, her feet bring her to the bathroom before even realizing. She doesn’t realize that she’s turning the doorknob or stripping completely. She barely registers her stepping into the steamy shower before and she definitely doesn’t fully register her tapping Steve on the shoulder, reaching up, and kissing him fiercely.

He pulls away first, “Y/N?”

She kisses him in response. This time, he responds but pulls away a few seconds later, “Why are you doing this? Are you drunk?”

“Yeah, it’s not why I’m doing this though,” she says, voice raspy.

“Why then?”

“Because I love you.”

“Oh,” was Steve’s response before kissing her again. The two sloppily make out like teenagers discovering sex for the first time before Steve pulls away again.

“I also love you, you know,” he says lazily against her lips. He feels her smile.

“That’s good,” she replies before kissing him once more.

The night lasts a lot longer than both of them intend. But it wasn’t like they were complaining.

---

Life had a strange way of playing out sometimes.

It seemed as if Y/N and Steve blinked and the rest of their lives fell straight into their laps.

When they meet new people, they always ask them how long they've been together or when they started dating.

“A lifetime ago,” Steve would always say, his eyes lighting up and his face flushing slightly.

After the night that Steve learned he passed the bar, Y/N and Steve’s relationship didn’t change all that much, mostly because they acted like they were married in the first place. They already help hands in public, gave each other kisses on the cheek when their friends were around, and they acted more domesticated than a lot of actual married couples only months after they officially started dating.

In fact, most of their friends didn’t even realize they had started dating until almost six months later, Y/N made an off-hand comment about how Steve was secretly really kinky in bed.

The really didn’t have an engagement either.

After two years of dating, five years of living together, and nine years of knowing each other, Steve just decided to get straight to the point.

“You wanna get married, Y/N?” Steve asked her. He had just come back from his job as a corporate lawyer. He honestly hated it but needed the experience and the money to pay off his student loans. His grand plan after he was no longer drowning in debt was to become an Assistant District Attorney.

Y/N stopped cutting the vegetables and turned toward Steve who was leaning against the fridge, suit jacket slung across one shoulder and top button his dress shirt undone. She raises a brow at him, “Pardon me?”

“You wanna get married?” he repeats nonchalantly.

“Now? I’m making dinner.”

“Whenever you want, doll.”

She sets the knife down and slowly walks towards him. “This isn’t you proposing, is it?” she cackles.

Steve shakes his head and laughs, meeting her halfway. “No, I thought of this while I was riding the subway back home. I don’t even have a ring, honey,” he explains. “If I’m honest, it feels like we’ve been married for the past five years, so I kinda forgot that we aren’t.”

Y/N purses her lips in concentration before saying, “That’s fair.”

Steve stares at her for a few more seconds, “So…?”

“Do you want to get married?” she asks him this time, stepping forward and grasping his hands.

“I mean…yeah,” Steve says with a grin, “Telling people you’re my wife is a lot cooler than telling people you’re my girlfriend. Besides, if I ever commit a crime, you have the right not to testify against me because of marital privilege—”

He’s cut off with howling laughter and Y/N burying her face into his chest as he wraps his arms around her. Steve’s tired, really tired, but coming home to her was what he reminded himself he was working for.

“Should we do the whole proposal thing, too?” Y/N asks him after her laughter dies down.

“I don’t mind proposing if it’s something you want to do,” he tells her, pressing his lips to her head.

“Meh. I don’t really care,” she says cheekily before pressing her lips to his.

After their wedding—just like Y/N and Steve predicted—their lives didn’t change all too much. The only noticeable changes were that they were being addressed as Y/L/N-Rogers in the mail, but their lives were pretty much the same.

Their friends found it fascinating: when they had gotten married, they felt that their relationship dynamic had changed a little. But then again, they supposed Steve and Y/N had been acting like they’ve been married since the ripe age of twenty. It’s almost like they skipped a few steps in their relationship and went from friends to acting like they’ve been married for forty years.

The biggest change in their relationship came three years after their wedding when their twins, Avery and Jameson Y/L/N-Rogers were born into the world.

Steve and Y/N were natural parents and they loved their kids. When the twins were three, they took them on their first road trip to the Adirondacks. They spent the weekend at a lakefront cabin, swimming, canoeing, and hiking. When asked years later, the twins would always explain that this was their first memory. At four, the twins started school, and to say Y/N and Steve were worried would be a huge lie. They knew Avery and Jameson would protect each other no matter what. At age seven, a boy on the playground called Avery an ‘ugly liar’, and Jameson threw sand in his face. Steve gave Jameson a scolding about how it was bad to throw sand at people and instead saying that if he was going to throw something, throw a punch instead.

Y/N had to step in and tell him not to do that unless it was a last resort.

At twelve, Jameson had his first real crush on a girl named Mindy. But, Avery knew that Mindy was mean and the daughter of an entitled Karen, so when Jameson asked Mindy if she wanted to dance with her at the school dance, Avery made sure to scare her straight.

“My daddy is a lawyer and sends criminals to prison and my mommy works for the New York Times. So, if you hurt James, everyone will know how mean you actually are are,” Avery threatened, which made Mindy back out of dancing with Jameson. Despite being mad when he was twelve, he was thankful years later when he saw firsthand what kind of teenager Mindy would become.

Now at sixteen, though the two twins were still thick as thieves, they matured into respectable, and frankly perfect kids.

That year, the Fourth of July (aka Steve’s birthday) fell the same night as movie night and the twins took it upon themselves to plan their dad’s party.

“Avery? James? You doin’ alright?” Y/N called from the upper floor of their brownstone in Park Slope, Brooklyn. When it was obvious that Avery and Jameson were at the age that they couldn’t share a bedroom anymore, Steve convinced Y/N to move back to Brooklyn. It wasn’t the difficult, per se, especially when Steve found a place close to where Natasha and her now-husband Bruce lived.

“Doin’ just fine, Mom!” Avery calls back. She was busy frosting the good-old Stars and Stripes cake while James finished the last-minute decorations.

Just then, Y/N heard a thud before some soft moaning. She gasped, already halfway down the stairs. “Are you okay? Do you need help? Screw your surprise, I’m com—”

“No!” James shouted, quickly sitting up, “I just fell off a stool, Mom. No big deal, you don’t need to come downstairs.”

“Are you su—”

“Yep! This is supposed to be a surprise!” James calls back.

“A surprise for your dad, not for me Jameson.”

Avery cackles from the kitchen and James rolls his eyes at her. “We’re fine, I promise,” he reassures her.

“Okay, just be done before everyone gets here. Bucky’s stalling your dad for as long as possible but I know he’ll want to come home soon.”

When Y/N is finally allowed downstairs, she’s impressed with their work. Red, white, and blue streamers are hung all across the ceiling as well as helium balloons that say ‘Happy Birthday America!’ except America is crossed out with Sharpie and ‘Steve Rogers’ is written in her kids’ handwriting instead. In the living room, several games are put out on the coffee table and a playlist full of patriotic movies is ready to be played on the TV. All her friends (minus Bucky and Steve) are in the living room, having a laugh at all the funny touches on the decorations. Their dining table was filled with food their friends brought for the potluck, and for some reason, James had blasted (and looped) a remix of the Star-Spangled Banner and Happy Birthday.

“Do you like it, Mom?” Y/N hears before turning around and facing her kids. Avery’s hand was grasped in James’ and her heart melts. How did I get so lucky? she asks herself.

She gives them a huge smile before enveloping both of them into a hug. “It’s amazing. Better than anything I could’ve done, that’s for sure.”

“Do you think, Dad’ll like it?” James mumbles into her shoulder.

“HOLY FUCKING SHIT!” a voice suddenly shouts. The three pull apart to find Steve standing at the entrance of the living room with a huge grin on his face. Bucky stands behind him, chuckling at his reaction.

Y/N’s smile widens at the sight of her husband. “There’s your answer, James.”

The party is everything Steve could have really asked for. The food was great, his company was even better, and the thoughtfulness of his kids was enough to bring tears to his eyes.

When the night gets darker, the party of people head to the roof of the building so they can watch the fireworks. As they wait, Avery has everyone engrossed in a story of how James followed her on a date with a boy she really liked, Peter Parker. Steve stood at the edge of the crowd, smiling at how happy his kids and his wife looked. He feels a presence beside him and doesn’t need to look to know who it is.

“You did pretty great, Steve,” Bucky tells him softly.

“With Avery and James?” he asks.

“With life, buddy.”

Steve hums contently as the two of them watch Avery cause a bubble of laughter to erupt from the group. James punches her playfully on the arm, but the smile is still evident on his face.

“How’s Steph?” Steve asks him.

“She’s good. She’s with her mom for the weekend,” Bucky answers quietly.

“And how are you and Dolores?”

Bucky is silent for a few seconds. He clears his throat before saying, “Talking. We’re trying to work it out for Steph’s sake. She doesn’t deserve to have a broken family.”

Steve puts a hand on his shoulder. “You don’t give yourself enough credit, Buck. You’re a good father,” he tells his best friend.

Bucky remains silent. After a few minutes of silence, Bucky’s conscious drowns him in guild and he speaks up, “I kissed Y/N when we were younger. It was the night you learned you passed the bar. I told her I thought I made a mistake marrying Dolores, and shit…I don’t even know what I was thinking because I knew she probably loved you. I’m so sorry, Steve. I never told you because you’re my best friend and—”

“Bucky,” Steve cuts him off with a small, sympathetic smile, “It’s okay. I know.”

Bucky’s brows shoot up. “You know?” he asks.

Steve nods, “Y/N told me. Y/N tells me everything.”

Bucky exhales, “Ah.”

“I’m not mad,” Steve tells him.

“You’re not?”

“I am married to her and still best friends with you, aren’t I?”

Bucky chuckles and looks down. He doesn’t deserve Steve, Bucky thinks. But he’s damn grateful a guy like him is in his life. “I’m still sorry,” he says.

“It’s okay, Bucky. I mean it,” Steve says, giving his shoulder a squeeze.

The two stand in comfortable silence when the fireworks finally start to go off. The roof glows with red light and Steve can’t help but admire how beautiful Y/N looks with the glow of light on her skin. Avery has her head on Y/N’s shoulder while Jameson has an arm wrapped around her torso. Steve notices Bucky admiring his family too.

“You know,” Steve starts, “she loved you when we were younger. I actually thought the two of you would be great together and wanted her to ask you out. She was about to.”

Bucky looks at him. “Really,” he asks suspiciously.

“Mhmm,” Steve hums, still looking at the fireworks. “And did you?”

“Did I what?”

“Love her?”

Bucky is silent. He stares at Steve’s side profile; he’s still staring up at the fireworks without a care in the world.

Bucky sighs and answers honestly, “All throughout college, even when I was with Dolores. But guessing by your reaction, I think you already knew that.”

Steve finally glances in his direction, “I’m your best friend. Of course, I knew.”

“Did I ever have a chance with her?”

“Yeah,” Steve says, finally looking at Bucky, “once you did.”

Bucky sighs, “How’d you do it? How’d you find someone you love so naturally?”

Steve shakes his head, his eyes trained on his wife and his kids. They looked so happy, living in their own little bubble. Steve smiles softly before saying, “I stuck around.”

Bucky nods wordlessly before turning his attention back to the fireworks above. Steve continues to stare at his family when Y/N turns around and catches his gaze. Despite the night sky, her eyes are bright and filled with joy and love.

Steve smiles widely at her.

And in their own imperfect, but beautiful bubble, Y/N smiles back.

---

steve rogers taglist: @milea​

[riofann]

Rio Random

You don’t know how long you have been standing there but you watch as their body language speaks for them. You hear some words but you can’t really tell what they are talking about it’s loud at the house. An involuntary sharp breath is taken when you see him push her hair back. 

“Y/N?”  Your head snaps towards the direction of your name “Hey!” Marie a long time acquaintance walks over to you looking cheerful “I haven't seen you in so long” she comments

You force out a smile “Hey Marie! how are you?” you ask leaning into the hug

“I’m good! how are you wow look at you!” she compliments

You smile and look down at yourself “thanks you look good too!”

“We should hang out sometime”

“Yea! Yea text me!” 

“Yea definitely!  I gotta run my boyfriends waiting for me.” She gives you another quick hug “I just wanted to say ‘Hi’” 

“Oh okay”  you don't wait till she walks away before your eyes are trained on them but this time they are looking at you smiling. Trying to play it cool. 

You march towards them and their smiles drop they knew they were caught.  Without a word you start grabbing your things

“Y/N” Krystal calls to you sounding apologetic 

“Excuse me” you say as you push past her and Rio

Rio shoots Krystal a mug pissed that she decided now was the for this conversation. He’s close on your tail as you walk out the door calling your name. 

“Y/N!”  he calls to you 

You spin around so fast he almost runs into you “WHAT?” 

“Its not...”

You don’t want to hear anything he has to say so you cut him off “Why not her huh Rio?” you ask repeating the words Krystal said to him “why not her Rio why Me?” You didn't even know what the context was but you could only imagine and your mind was doing circles trying to make sense of it

He’s calm and puts his hands in his pockets “Its not what it looks like” 

You feel like slapping him its almost like he was un-phased by your emotions “Then what is it? I mean I get it we aren't a couple” you start to gesticulate with your hands  “and this thing doesn't really have a label but”  you scoff “for someone who “didn't know” Krystal you sure don't mind touching her!” 

“Y/N!”  You hear Krystal’s voice approaching you. 

You put your finger up for to stop talking 

“We were just talking” she tries to reason as she approaches you 

“About what?” you ask looking at Rio

They both remain silent, but Krystal keeps looking over at Rio almost as a guidance on how to react or not 

“What?” you pause to catch a breath you were getting riled up  “is this some sick joke between both of you?” 

“No its not....”  she struggles to find the words “Its...uh” 

“So why not her huh Rio i mean what was that all about?”  

“Nothing he was just” she tries answering for him and he scowls at her 

You cut your eyes at her “i didn't ask you so shut the fuck up!” 

You turn to look at Rio and he stands there with an expressionless face. 

You nod understanding that he wasn’t going to respond to you “Perfect!” you say before you walk away. 

It's not like you didn't have an idea about who Rio is or what he does. But for both of them to lie to you and pretend that it was though that they met it each other through you is what you didn't understand. If they knew each other from before why not just admit it? What were they hiding? 

-

Even after he calls you multiple times you refuse to talk to him. Damage control wasn’t really going to work on you. Roughly 2 months pass before you see him again. You were with your Aunt Brenda at the country club near her home accompanying her to a charity event taking place. If you can describe your aunt  she was just like Blanche Devereaux from Golden Girls but don’t get her started on the show, cuz she swore up and down they stole her personality. 

You both sit near the front of the court watching the tennis players play. There were 2 separate events Golf and Tennis and she opted for Tennis because walking around in the summer heat watching golf wasn't something she wanted to do. 

She’s cheerful probably from the mimosas shes had, bubbly and talking to everyone around her. She’s never met a stranger is what you always say, it was partially true. 

You stop breathing and your heart palpitates faster when you watch him walk onto the court.

“Ooh who is that?” Aunt Brenda comments a widow on the prowl she would catch anything that glimmered at her periphery 

You pull your straw hat down a little further and look away and down for the majority of the time he plays. When the games end you're glad hoping to make a beeline for the car. 

“Well that was fun!” she comments

“Yea!” you say as you people watch she had been chatting with friends and you drove her here so it’s not like you could just leave her without her knowing anyway. 

A younger man walk by her, he smiles at her and she fans herself “whoo if i was younger!”

“You're only as old as you feel” you comment looking around you feel paranoid he has to be around the corner I mean you were mingling with the players 

“You're right!...Hey! how about we eat here! Instead of driving across town again?” she suggests when no one else comes up to say hi 

“Uh sure”  you say looking around for the nearest exit

“Come on follow me” 

You both walk inside and you find your way to the eatery 

“Hi Mrs. Richmond how are you?” the hostess greets her with a bright smile  

“I’m good Ashley you look cute today!  Can i get a table for 2?”  

“Thank you! Sure! let me see” 

“Make sure it's somewhere I can see everybody... you know me” she winks 

“Yea!”  Ashley giggles at the inside joke as she looks at the seating chart she picks up two menus “right this way” 

You both follow Ashley to the table by the windows it was great spot you could actually see the whole room. It was kind of full and the tables around you were filled with families  you're thankful because that meant he would have a harder time spotting you, seeing that your back was to the door anyway at least that's what you thought. 

You and Aunt Brenda both look at the menus deciding what would be the best cure for hunger after seating in 90 degree weather for half the morning well into mid afternoon

“I don’t know i’m thinking a crisp salad with fruit will be good but hell i want something savory” she comments 

“Yea i feel the same way” you agree  “the sandwiches sound interesting they could be savory with fries” 

“I’m looking at this salmon”  she looks up at you “Oooh!  someones coming  sit up!” she snaps her fingers at you

You do so out of habit she was always for sitting proper and being dainty, you glance back and  feel your stomach drop it was Rio making his way towards you. You shoot him a half smile and turn to face your aunt bracing yourself for the conversation to come 

“Ladies” he speaks his voice sounding like music to your ears it felt like a long time had passed since you last heard it 

“Oooh hi” she says immediately smitten over his voice she daintily reaches her hand out “how are you I’m Brenda this is my niece...”

He grabs her hand and shakes it rubbing his thumb over it “Y/N”  he turns to face you while finishing her sentence

She looks between you two shocked “You two know each other?”

“Yea Aunt Brenda this is Mr. Rio” 

“Mr. Rio” she giggles “call me Brenda.... WOW!  Y/N!  you naughty thing you didn't tell me that you knew him all that pinning i was doing watching him play” 

You smile” uh i didn't know if it was him really playing” you lie 

You are all quiet for a moment before Brenda interjects “You wanna join us?” 

“Sure if you don't mind” Rio comments looking at you not really caring about Brenda

“Yea its fine!” 

“Y/N move!” she says gesticulating for you to stand up 

“What?”  

“Switch seats”  she explains  wanting you to sit in the seat middle you sigh as you shuffle over to the right Rio pulls out your chair 

“Such a gentleman” Brenda comments and you refrain from rolling your eyes 

“Thanks” 

“So!” she leans over perking her bosom giving all her attention to Rio  “how do you two know each other?” 

You didn't know how to describe your friends with benefits relationship  “We met via a friend” you say 

“Oh okay tell me about yourself Mr. Rio”  she says taking a sip of her water

He smirks leaning back on his seat “you can just call me Rio...what do you want to know Brenda” 

Brenda blushes “well Rio first that tattoo... did it hurt?” she can’t take her eyes off it 

He takes a sip of water and the muscles in his neck only accentuate the tattoo more “A little”  he says flirts back 

“Ooh” she fans hereslf taking a sip of water “i need to find the waiter” she says looking around “he needs to bring another pitcher of water im getting dehydrated here that voice!” 

“OKAY BRENDA!” 

Rio laughs throwing his head back 

“What? that voice that tattoo that face mmmm!”

“BRENDA!” you scold looking at her 

“Wha?”  she looks at you innocently

“Can you” you shake your head don't mind her

“Nah i don't mind at all” he smiles 

Things are quiet again and you and Rio sit staring at each other

“Well i’m gonna go to the bar get us some drinks. Moscow mule for you I know Rio can i get you anything?” 

“Nah ’m good with water thanks” 

“Okay you two behave” 

“Yea”  you say glancing up at her

“Shes fun!” he says chuckling at her looking back and winking at him  

“She’s a trip”  you say shaking your head at her comment “what can I help you with Rio?” you ask cutting to the chase 

“You look good” his voice drops lower 

“Thanks!” you try not to blush  “didn't know you played tennis. Played well” you hope to change the direction of the conversation 

“Thanks. I called you” he points out your lack of answering his calls 

“I know I was busy at the time” 

He nods accepting your excuse “we need to talk” 

“No we don’t.... about what?” 

“I'm sure you got questions for me” 

“You're not gonna tell me the truth anyway, so what's the point?”

“Try me” he challenges leaning forward 

You sigh “no” you were defeated 

“What?” he says noticing the expression on your face 

“Was i just a pawn in your game of chess?.... like you didn't care about me?.....At all?”

He holds a puzzled look “Where’d you get that from?” 

“I” you take a deep breath “nevermind” 

He sees Brenda coming back and stands up “i gotta go call me sometime”

“I don’t even have your number you call me on blocked all the time”

“Check your phone”  he says as he walks away and when you do you have a new message with a simple text of ‘call me’

“Where's he going?” Brenda asks as she approaches the table

“He had to go”  you answer

“Why’d you let him leave?” 

“What was I supposed to hold him down?!” 

“Yes! now i have no eye candy” she says pouting 

“I'm sure you’ll find someone” 

“You're right” She turns to face you and looks at you for awhile before saying “so are you wanna talk about what's going on between you two?”

“Not really” you respond looking down 

“Come on you can tell me I'm your Aunty Brenda” 

You sigh she was right you would often go to her when you had relationship problems and you're actually consider telling her how you got to this point.

-

Even after having his number you still opt to not call him. Every time you get ready to you stop yourself remembering how you both got to this point and figure it's best if you don't even open that can of worms. 

Another month passes before you two run into each other. This time at a dive bar that's kinda how you two met anyway at a bar. 

“So Mike tells me he wants  a threesome for his birthday!”

“What?!”  you say snapping back into the conversation with your best friend Mia

“Yea! that is what i said WTF right?”

You take a sip of your drink “Wow so what are you gonna do?” 

“He can kick rocks unless he wants to find me another man to fuck” 

You both erupt in laughter knowing it would never happen 

You spend the majority of the night talking about life before your bladder is threatening to embarrass you, is when you get up and go to the bathroom. 

“I gotta go pee!” you say jumping from the bar stool 

“Go! Go!”  she shoos you away putting her foot on your stool to save it

You walk hastily across the bar and find the bathroom a mini line with one person in front of you.

When you finally get to pee it feels like heaven on earth. And feel like you can finally breathe. It was such a relaxing feeling to pee when you had been drinking. 

There's a knock on the door  

“Just a minute!” You say loudly hoping they can hear you through the loud music 

You finish your business and go to wash your hands when the person knocks again “GIVE ME A MINUTE!” You scream this time but when the knock happens again you're convinced this person was a true dick and you yank the door ready to have an argument only to see Rio standing on the other side

“Really” you say unamused “excuse me”  you go to walk past him but like true Rio nature he backs you into the bathroom instead locking the door behind him

“What do you want?” you snap 

“Wow no hi” 

“Hi Rio you look good i hope life is treating you well!... what. do. you. want?”

He smirks at your sarcastic tone “You supposed to call me” 

“Yea i didn't want you lying to me anymore” 

He sucks his teeth “how you know i was gon’ lie” 

“Ummm well lets see I know absolutely nothing about you. Oh besides the fact that you play tennis I’m sure your name isn't even Rio. You and Krystal have or had something going on that involved me and unbeknownst to me you were both playing me like a fiddle!” 

He chuckles

“Is this funny to you”

“Yea kinda” he says stepping closer to you 

You scoff “of course” you go to walk away from him but he steps in your way 

“Nah I’m not done talking” he looks down at you 

“What do you want to talk about?” you separate yourself from him, you couldn’t be around him, the cologne the voice, 

He says nothing and just looks at you

“You wanna tell me it comes with the territory and i should know these things by now? I do i also know you probably have 10 other girls waiting for you to call so it's not a big deal I’m not a big deal I don't see why you're insisting on resolving things with me!” 

Truth be told he did try to get over you and move on but he found himself thinking about you more often than not

“Krystal isn't who you think she is” 

“And you choose now to tell me that? I kinda figured when you two were looking like exes at the party” 

He takes in a deep breath and watches you

“ Do you know what it's like Rio. I’m completely exposed to you. You know everything! Everything! the good things, the bad things, things I will take to the grave with me things that I don't even want my parents to know about and majority of it i told you, the others you have your “connections” yet I don't even know your name. And then you and Krystal have something going on I don't know what. I don’t get how I’m tied into all of it.” 

He still says nothing and looks at you expressionless jaws tight

“Are you just gonna stand there and say nothing?” His apathy was really getting to you “........What was i a facade or something” 

“Nah” 

You sigh and throw your head back the liquor getting to you “I can't do this i just”  you reach for the door knob and he backs up against it “can you please” you plead with him, he bits on his lower lip he looks like he’s thinking about what to say next but instead he slowly stands straight, his eyes boring a hole into you as you leave the bathroom 

“Wow that took you long!” Mia comments its been close to 20 minutes 

“Yea i ran into someone”

“Who?”

“That guy” your new nickname for him 

“What?” she said confused  “ohhhh Rio” 

“Yea” you say taking a sip  

“What hes here?” she says looking around

“Yea don't make it obvious”

Her head snaps to face you “Sorry... you okay?” she asks rubbing your arm 

“Yea!” 

“You wanna leave?” she suggests 

“NO! Its our night out forget him!” 

“You sure?” 

“Yup fuck him”  

You both drink and the bar gets full and by now you’ve turned to face the crowd and people watch while talking shit at the same time

“Hey” you hear his voice next to you

“Hi!”  you say looking at him “this is Mia” you introduce her, since they never met before, but they both knew of each other 

He smiles “nice to meet you” 

“Mhmmm Hi Rio” she says as she holds an unamused expression

“Must have heard a lot about me huh?” 

“Some good things” 

He nods “what yall drinking” 

“Knock me downs”

“You want another round?” 

“Yea!” Mia responds for both of you 

“Y/N?” he asks you before lightly grazing his tongue on his bottom lip 

“Sure!” you say adjusting in your seat, its fair to say being around him while you were under the influence was asking a lot of you

“Its packed today!” Mia comments bobbing her head to the music

“Yea its a good night! why aint yall on the dance floor?” 

“You see these?”  Mia says pointing to her shoes “these aren't dancing shoes”

“So you just wanna sit and look cute?” 

“Period” you both say in unison

“Y/N?” 

“Yea” 

“What's your excuse”  

“What she said” you said pointing your thumb backwards to Mia 

“Thanks”  he says speaking to the bartender

“Come dance with me”  he says while motioning his head to the dance floor or rather where people were dancing

“Oh no!” you shake your head vigorously 

“Come on please  just one”  he says with his hand open waiting for you 

“Fine!” you say taking his hand in yours

“I'll save your seat!” 

He has a tight grip on your hand as he pulls you to the middle. He stops turns and faces you the music changes and he pulls you closer to him as you dance to bachata 

“Wow” you’re at a loss of words as you both move on the dance floor  

“What you thought this was?” he flirts 

“I didn't think this” you blush as you both move around the dance floor he holds your hand up so you can twirl for him while he smiles at you. For someone who was apathetic he sure did have moves.He spins you around so that your back is to him and you can't help but squeal as he moves your body along with his sometimes with sudden dips, making you hold onto his arms tighter. You feel his breath on your neck as the tempo changes indicating change of songs. 

With arms wrapped around you tightly you both sway to the music you feel a light kiss on your neck “I missed you” he admits 

You wanna call bs but this was diff he wouldn't even as much as say hi to you in public and now all of a sudden you are at a bar dancing with him 

“You heard me?”  he asks not sure because you didn't react you nod in response and step away so you can turn to face him he pulls you close

He looks deep into your eyes “I'm not lying” 

“Okay”  you say as you continue to sway to the music

“Last call for drinks last call” the DJ announces 

You both step away from each other and look towards the dj booth

When he looks at you again you can't help but blush Rio had a way of communicating with his facial expressions without a word being uttered

“You good?” he asks teasing you

“Yup! Lets go!” you say wanting to get out of the dance floor

“WHOO!”  Mia cheers as you two reach her

“That was cute!” 

“What you getting into after this?”

“Going home”

He smacks his lips “com’on ma” 

“No i think i should go home.” 

He nods respecting your decision

“She needs a date with a Denis she’s been grouchy I have a strong feeling you can fix that” 

He laughs

“Okay time for me to take you home” 

“What?” 

“We are gonna go it was nice seeing you” 

He pushes a strand out of your face and you take in a sharp breath “make sure you text me telling me you reached safe or ima pull up”

“Okay”

[giovaenna]

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐆𝐎𝐃𝐅𝐀𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓 𝐈𝐈 (𝟏𝟗𝟕𝟒) 𝐒𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒

“ I feel rotten about telling you this. “ “ I've got some bad news. ” “ You looked after me like a father. ” “ Take this to your family. ” “ I’m not interested in things that don't concern me. “ “ You still have my goods ? “ “ It would be a present, I know how to return a favor. “ “ This is a real palace. “ “ Sit down, make yourself comfortable. “ “ Good health is the most important thing. “ “ I came here because there's going to be more bloodshed. “ “ Nobody wants another war. “ “ When i refused, he tried to have me killed. “ “ He was stupid, I was lucky. “ “ I'll visit him soon. “ “ The important thing is that nothing interferes with our plans for the future. “ “ You're a wise and considerate young man. “ “ There's much I can learn from you. “ “ What we'll do in the next few months will make history. “ “ He's small potatoes. “ “ Is something wrong? “ “ I wish you would have let me know you were coming, I could have prepared something. “ “ I didn't want you to know I was coming. “ “ I want you to help me take my revenge. “ “ I don't have your brain for big deals, but this is a street thing. “ “ I remember when I was a kid, we had to be quiet when we played near here. “ “ My father taught me many things here. He taught me in this room. “ “ Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer. “ “ Will he come alone? “ “ You guys lied to me, I don't want you to call me anymore. “ “Close the fucking door ! “ “ What's the matter? “ “ You open the fucking bar I'll blow your head in. “ “ When I woke up I was on the floor, and I donit know how it happened. “ “ jesus, jesus. “ “ I dont know and i dont understand why, i can't remember. “ “ I'll speak to him. “ “ The doctors would disagree, but what do they know? “ “I saw an interesting thing happen today. “ “ It occurred to me, the soldiers were paid to fight. The rebels weren't. “ “ What I wouldn't give for twenty more years. “ “ I’m kind of nervous from the trip. Can I get a drink or something? “ “ It's not easy to be a son. “ “ How do you say bana daquiri ? “ “ Can i trust you with something? “ “ Before i reach my hotel, i'll be assassinated. “ “ He thinks he's gonna live forever. “ “ Someone put a bullet through his eye. No one knows who gave the order. “ “ i love you, but don’t ever take sides against the family again. ever. “ “ I didnt ask who gave the order because it had nothing to do with business. “ “When i wake, if the moneys on the table i'll know i have a partner. If it isnt, i'll know i dont. “ “ I know it was you, [name]. You broke my heart. “ “ You're still my brother. “ “ Where's my brother? “ “ Young man, i hear you and your friends are stealing goods “ “ You and your friends should show me some respect. “ “ You young punks have to learn how to respect a man like me ! “ “ The cops will show up at your house and your family will be ruined. “ “ Of course if I’m wrong about how much you stole - I’ll take a little less. “ “ Tell your friends i don’t want a lot , just enough to keep my mouth shut. “ “ Why should we give him the money we sweated for? “ “ I’ll reason with him. “ “ I never lie to my friends. “ “ Tell him you'll pay him whatever he wants, dont argue with him. Then i'll go and get him to agree. “ “ Just remember that i did you a favor. “ “ I'll make an offer he won't refuse. “ “ I’m short of money right now. I’ve been out of work so... give me a little time. “ “ How come I’ve never heard of you before? “ “ You’ve got a lot of guts. “ “ You’ve done well for yourself. “ “ [Name], your father loves you so much. “ “ We called it a family. “ “ At first like everybody else, I was a soldier. “ “ When the boss says push a button on a guy, I push a button. “ “ No, i never talked to him. “ “ You may find this very amusing but i promise you the members of this committee do not. “ “ He was being strong for his family. “ “ By being strong for his family, could he lose it? “ “ You can never lose your family. “ “ Times are changing. “ “ It’s my pleasure, i dont want money. Take it as a gift. “ “ If theres something i can do for you, you come, we talk. “ “ [Name], why did you come to see me? “ “ He said he'd get the police to throw me out on the street. “ “ Who the hell are you to come give me orders? “ “ Do me this favor, I wont forget it. “ “ Ask your friends in the neighborhood about me, they'll tell you I know how to return a favor. “ “ Im giving back the money you gave me. “ “ Your kindness made me feel ashamed of myself. “ “ Can i offer you coffee? “ “ He won't be back. “ “ It was a term used by his friends. One of attention and respect. “ “ They have honored me with their support and friendship. “ “It would be a shame if we allowed a few rotten apples to give a bad name to the whole barrel. “ “ They are the salt of the earth and the backbones of this country. “ “ i hope they will have the decency to clear my name with the same publicity with which they have besmirched it. “ “ Well, just get a good night's sleep. “ “ Tomorrow... my life wont be worth more than a nickel after tomorrow. “ “ You’ve got a great home here, for the rest of your life. “ “ You'll live like a king. You’ll be a hero. “ “ How did they get their hands on him? “ “ He thought you double crossed him. “ “ Our detectives said he was half dead, scared stiff calling out that you'd turned on him. “ “ I havent got a lot to say, [name]. “ “ What about now? Is there anything you can help me out with? “ “ I didn't know it was gonna be a hit. I swear to God i didn’t know. “ “ He said there was something in it for me if i could help him out. “ “ He said that you were being tough on the negotiations. “ “ It would be good for the family. “ “ He said it would be good for the family. “ “ And you believed that story? You believed that? “ “ He said there was something in it for me, on my own. “ “ I’ve alway taken care of you. “ “ Did you ever think about that? Did you ever once think about that? “ “ It ain't the way I wanted it ! “ “ I can handle things, I’m smart. Not like everybody says. “ “ You’re nothing to me now. Not a brother, not a friend. I don’t want to know you, or what you do. “ “ There’s more people than at a ballgame here! “ “ I have my own family. “ “ But it was all lies, everything. “ “ So I said yeah, sure why not. “ “ There are some things id like to talk to you about. “ “ What really happened with [name]? “ “ Where is he now? “ “ I had nothing to do with it. “ “ You’ve become blind! “ “ I don’t want to hear about it “ “ At this moment i feel no love for you at all. “ “ I never thought that would happen, but it has. “ “ We leave tomorrow. “ “ [Name], you haven’t heard me. “ “ In time, you'll think differently. “ “ I know what that meant to you. I'll make it up to you. “ “ I’ve learned that I have the strength to change. “ “ I had it killed because this must all end. “ “ I know now that it’s over. I knew it then. “ “ There would be no way you could ever forgive me. “ “ I'd like to stay close to home now, if it’s alright. “ “ I hated you for so many years. “ “ I think that I did things to myself, to hurt myself, so that you'd know that I could hurt you. “ “ You were just being strong for all of us. “ “ I forgive you. “ “ Can't you forgive [name] ? “ “ Our business friend and partner is in the news. “ “ He's only got six months anyways. “ “ It would be like trying to kill the president, theres no way we can get to him. “ “ If anything in this life is certain, if history has taught us anything - it’s that you can kill anyone. “ “ Is it worth it? You’ve won, do you want to wipe everybody out? “ “ I don’t feel I have to wipe everybody out. Just my enemies, that’s all. “ “ I've always been loyal to you. What is this? “ “ Every time i put a line in the water I said a Hail Mary, and every time I said a Hail Mary I caught a fish. “ “ He's ten times tougher than me. Old fashioned. “ “ We were like the roman empire. “ “ When a plot against the emperor failed, the plotters were always given a chance to let their families keep their fortunes. “ “ The little guys, they got knocked off. “ “ [Name], kiss your mama goodbye. “ “ Mother of God, pray for us sinners. “ “ You break your father's heart on his birthday. “ “ Your country ain’t your blood. “

[liveonmtv]

cash machine || kth

pairing: kim taehyung/f!reader genre: fluff & humor. crack actually. crack cocaine. word count: 11.1k warnings: strong language, drinking, an unwated kiss (not from tae), unsanitary jokes (i’m immature), implied sex, vomiting extra: (fr)enemies to lovers, road trip au, rich kids au but it’s barely there also they’re on summer vacation, also this story takes place in the usa JUST to drag the trip out tbh

summary: Jungkook and Seokjin get a little problematic, you have anger issues and Taehyung is under the impression that he killed a man. Also, did you mention that you’re on your way to your unfunny cousin’s wedding? Go on a road trip from Missouri to Las Vegas and you’ll be in for a hilarious yet scary experience! 

a/n: hi! i’m just starting this account out, so reblogging would mean a lot to me. i’m a novice to writing, so criticism is welcome as long as you’re not rude about it. have fun reading (i hope)! i also have a jungkook fic planned next (:

song

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

Jungkook has that look in his face, the one he makes where the person sitting opposite of him is about as depraved as he is. He’s given it to you while you were explaining to him how to scam desperate men under the preface of a faux premium Snapchat and he’s given it to Jimin when they were finishing their high school careers and decided to release grasshoppers in the principal’s office. 

However, if there’s one person that’s about as fucked up in the head as he is, it’s Seokjin. The man also suffers from SMSTS as well (Serious Misconception of Sexual Tension Syndrome, and yes, that’s quite a lot of s’s), which doesn’t hurt given the current affairs. 

While Jungkook is aware that Jimin and Hoseok are always up for a bit of mischief, he has ruled them both out as incompetents and moved on to the real deal. Jimin has these rare moments of sanity and Hoseok, as your most loyal little bitchboy, would probably tattle the situation with made-up details to you before the plan is even set in action. 

So, Seokjin it is. 

The story begins in a faraway land before Jungkook knew about the tragic facets of your family’s relationships. Though his friend group is on good terms with your siblings and your other close relatives are aware of their existence and somehow only have good things to say about them, he never thought they’d be invited to your cousin’s wedding. To be fair, you had to do some serious persuasion for your family to allow you to invite six more people to somebody else’s wedding so there’s that factor contributing, but still, the offer is out of the blue.

Somewhere along the way, you went on a tangent about how much you hate your cousin and how your aunt doesn’t have eyebrows and how bothersome it is to look at her face. Your horror stories were mostly you just being your usual dramatic self, but they also revealed that the [L/n]s aren’t what they appear to be. 

You begged and begged for them to accept the invitations, and though Namjoon and Yoongi, unfortunately, couldn’t make it, the others agreed. 

Then arose the problem of the sixth spot that couldn’t be filled. You would’ve just let it be but your parents insisted that if you’re going to ask for something, you should fulfill it until the end. It was Namjoon you’d asked to come first, but he was busy with visiting family back in Seoul, and Yoongi then declared that he didn’t feel like humoring you this once. And that was the exact moment Jungkook decided to strike.

“You want to play matchmaker?” Jin asks. And though he looks almost skeptical, his tone is definitely an excited one. “With [Y/n] and Tae, of all people?” 

“Well yes, think about it logically,” he explains as he is about to say something completely illogical. “She has that sixth spot to fill, she has no other friends and they’re perfect for each other. All the other shit we’re gonna pull is just for fun, though.”  

Jin laughs an evil laugh, always one to be up for evil schemes. Just another evil day in the evil life of Kim Seokjin. “Well, [Y/n] is Tae’s perfect mean girl. And that girl needs either therapy or to get laid, but like, same.” 

“See? You get me.”

“To be fair, I think that goes for all of us. No offense.” 

“None taken,” Jungkook agrees. “Anyways, I was thinking of a… road trip.” 

“Well you didn’t have to be so dramatic about it, this isn’t The Godfather. Though I do feel like I’ve definitely got a bit of Michael Corleone in me.” 

Jungkook shrugs his shoulders nonchalantly at the other fiend’s remark. “You can pray to god all you want. Here in these streets, the only thing we believe in is El Chapo.” 

“I— Okay…” 

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

[11:05] LeBruh James: wtf is wrong with u

[11:05] LeBruh James: get help seriously

[11:06] jk the slump god: all i said was that u should invite taehyung as the 6th person to ur cussin’s wedding 

[11:06] jk the slump god: overreacting arent we 

[11:10] LeBruh James: what the hell is a cussin bitch im gonna kill u

[11:13] jk the slump god: not like u have anyone else to invite tho 

[11:13] jk the slump god: hes not that bad ur just being urself

[11:14] LeBruh James: ur literally Not helping ur case rn

[09:45] LeBruh James: none of the girls want to gooooo

[09:45] LeBruh James: fine if it has to be taehyung ig ill live w it

[10:30] jk the slump god: great he already said yes

[10:30] jk the slump god: btw we’re gonna go in las vegas at the end of a road trip u in?

[10:33] LeBruh James: HE SAID YES BEFORE I EVEN INVITED HIM…

[10:33] LeBruh James: EYE. OK.

[10:33] LeBruh James: on one hand i kind of dont want to see any of u but if ur all gone i wont have anything to do b4 the wedding so i guess im in by proxy

[10:34] jk the slump god: lovely doing business with u y/n-chan

[10:36] LeBruh James: call me y/n-chan again and I Will Put ur Dick-Chan in a Freezer-sama and then Cut-san it off

[10:39] jk the slump god: i dont think ur using the honorifics correctly tbh..

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

“I don’t see how this is a good idea,” you state with a dramatic pout while looking out of the window. Your expression is solemn. 

Taehyung kind of can’t believe that you’re throwing a tantrum just because you had to sit next to him in the three-row SUV, but on the other hand, he’s kind of into it. You’re more appalled by the fact that he’s not as disgusting up close as you’d imagined him to be. Well granted, you’re being immature, but it’s your shtick so they take it with a grain of salt.

“Why’s that?” Jungkook asks obtusely. He ruined your life the moment he started calling you [Y/n]-chan and he has that bad case of crazy eyes he gets sometimes when you look at his reflection in the mirror going on right now. You’d be more understanding of his condition, hadn’t your trip started barely five minutes ago. 

“What do you mean why is that? We’re all unstable backstabbing lunatics, do you think we can survive together for six whole days?! Stranded or even in a hotel? And then the ride back to Springfield?”

“Hotel? You’re funny. It’s always been my dream to sleep in a motel,” Jin pipes up. 

“Seriously? No limo, now this.”

“Hotel, motel, holiday inn,” Hoseok starts singing. Perhaps if it was queen Britney, it would’ve curbed your temper but fate doesn’t seem to be that kind. 

“Hotel, motel, holiday inn! Hotel, motel, holiday inn! Hotel, motel, holiday inn!” 

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

“So we’re not going to visit the Grand Canyon?” 

“It’s in Nevada,” Jimin explains. “We don’t have any business there except for going to the wedding. I’d be more down to do it if I wasn’t afraid that one of us, meaning [Y/n], would push one of the others, meaning you, in the gutter.” 

“Just a little visit?” Taehyung is talented at only hearing what he wants to hear. However, that doesn’t make the conversation any more productive.

“Well not to be the acrophobic buzzkill, but why are you so adamant about visiting the Grand Canyon?” This is the first time you’ve directly addressed Taehyung since the beginning of these mind-numbing two hours. Jin, hands still on the wheel, dares to take a peek at Jungkook and smile an asshole-type smile before almost accidentally crashing into a pole. 

“Watch the road!” Hoseok cries out. Everyone else either refuses to acknowledge what just occurred or decides to spare themselves from doing so.

“Jin says that he always wanted to sleep in a motel. I have another dream.” 

“To visit the Grand Canyon?”

“Not exactly. I want to take a shit in there and see if I can hear it splatter. Think that’s possible?”

“Maybe if you angle your butthole the right way—” Jimin’s explanation is cut short.

“Oh my god, you are disgusting. Shut up. I don’t want to hear it.”  

“What did I tell you about El Chapo, [N/n]?” 

“What about El Chapo?”

“Holy shit, I think I’m confusing conversations,” Jungkook admits. Jin offers no more than an eye-roll.

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

Tulsa is a dump, really. Unfortunate that you had to make a stop here but also you’re satisfied because your right asscheek feels numb right now. Might have to take Kelly for a walk, though.  

Taehyung stumbles out of the vehicle after you and all six of you seize each other fleetingly before making your way towards the gas station, a tense sort of silence following. You’re first to speak up. “Y’know, I’ve been listening to your voices for so long now that I don’t wanna look at your faces.” 

“This tbh,” Hoseok agrees with your most profound sentiments as per the usual. He’s quick to match your pace, trailing after you like a lost puppy, successfully getting Taehyung out of his way. He puts his arm around your shoulders casually and you give him that sardonic smile that’s only really reserved for him.

“Don’t say tee-bee-aytch out loud. I get humiliation by proxy.” 

Jungkook makes an exaggerated gagging sound before nudging Taehyung subtly enough that Jin is the only one who sees the interaction. Though the eldest had agreed with his deranged idea, there’s one thing that Kook knows that Jin hasn’t come to find out. 

Taehyung has an ongoing problem or maybe he’s a masochist. He’s always been one to internally get attached to these girls who’d never give him the time of day, who can’t stand him at all. The tragedy-comedy that is his best friend’s love life started on a rainy day in second grade when a girl by the name of Seulbi punched him in the face and he was hooked on her for three years after. 

After the infamous Seulbi, came Yeonji from the cheerleading club who blew off his invite to his first-ever party when they were fifteen. She’d called him a loser to his face and he was smitten with her for a while, too. 

And then, you appeared in his life seemingly out of nowhere. Hoseok’s catty best friend with a tongue sharper than her stilettos and lipstick that goes perfectly with her skin tone. 

Of course, he was aware of your existence prior to that accident he calls his first conversation with you—be it from the exciting yet flat-out brain dead antics Hoseok would describe you’d gotten caught up in at the time or from the sound of your heels sinking into the floor promptly before you entered math class.  You were always late but claimed that the teacher should be grateful because you cut in line to arrive at school earlier. You always had one of those shitty overrated pumpkin spice lattes in your manicured hands. 

Simply put, Taehyung likes you. Though after your disastrous first meeting during which, blunt-natured and seemingly lacking a sense of self-preservation, he called you a stuck up moron and you threatened to make an attempt at his life. With your bullheaded nature, things never did solve themselves after that one instance.

It’s not something that he’s expressed outwardly, but Jungkook knows him better than he knows the back of his hand. Unfortunately, he knows you too, even if not as well and he knows how you can’t get a boyfriend because you either scare them away or you find out they’re only after a quick fuck and some money. 

Regardless, Jungkook writes off his inner ramblings as irrelevant before turning to Jin in what could be described as a conspirative manner. While clumsily handing the cashier gas money, he whispers something in the other man’s ear and Jin’s eyes literally twinkle like he’s in a low-budget porno. 

He nods, furiously so, and the cashier simply stares at them like they’re two idiots that somehow merged into one. It’s not a pretty sight. 

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

“What? We’re sleeping out here?” Your whining is to be expected by now. Had any of your friends written an actual, physical, list of all the things you’ve complained about so far, it’d probably fill a notebook. Thankfully enough, said list remained as a mental compilation of your not-so-epic moments. “What about the motel?” 

“Oh, so now you want a motel?” Jin quips back with a smirk. “They always come ‘round.” 

Despite his boasting and apparent eagerness to go to a motel, that doesn’t change the fact that you all find yourselves in a campsite. You’re not an outdoor person save for going to parties or on a shopping spree with Hoseok. And well, your surroundings are a bit too green right now.

Taehyung is the next person to speak up, with a tense posture and his arms crossed over his chest, almost defiantly so. “Honestly, if you don’t want to be here, I don’t understand why you keep coming to these things.”

“Well, I don’t understand why I had to invite your dumb ass here either. I guess the inner machinations of my mind are an enigma.” 

“Yeah, I thought Namjoon or Yoongi would be more fitting for your taste of guest,” he says, outright taunting you now, as if to remind you of your failed love rendezvous with your now close friends. 

“Well yeah, but they both denied, so I had to invite you.” 

“Ah,” he gives a slight sigh and you dismiss the sadness you register in his voice as something deserved for annoying you, “that does make more sense. Lucky me, I guess.”

“Awkies,” Jungkook announces as if it’s something that needs to be announced. Hoseok simply shrugs, and though you’re definitely not looking forward to sleeping out in the woods, he seems excited to try something new. 

There’s something hilarious about seeing a bunch of upper-class kids trying to set up tents and start a fire. You’ve converted to the cavemen with Hoseok, seemingly unaware that engaging in a one-sided debate with a bundle of sticks won’t make them randomly engulf in flames while Hoseok is trying out a trick he saw in the movies.

Honestly, it’s enough of a miracle that you actually went out in the woods and helped without tripping your silly ass and getting lost among the catacombs. Granted, Hoseok would’ve been compassionate enough to look for you had you gotten lost, but you probably wouldn’t get over the trauma of being covered in mud. 

Taehyung notices you both struggling. Part of him wants to make amends with you and a bigger part of him wants to leave Jimin to scramble on his own. Not that he’s sadistic or anything, he just likes seeing others suffer sometimes for entertainment purposes. 

Anyways. 

He approaches casually, like the kind of casual where you can tell that the person has an ulterior motive that they don’t want to reveal. Hoseok appears happy to see him, like he’s a savior on a white horse, while you don’t acknowledge him that much except for a sharp question regarding what he wants. 

He greets the older boy with one of these grins you won’t admit you enjoy looking at before roaming through the pockets of his jacket. Now that you’ve noticed him wearing one, you come to the sudden realization that it is getting quite breezy. 

Taehyung has the habit of scrunching his nose when he’s looking for something and then unconsciously smile broadly after succeeding in finding it. You don’t like that you’re aware of that and you especially don’t like that you can pinpoint the repetitive action.

It appears that Taehyung was looking for a lighter, of all things. 

“I thought you quit smoking?” You simply give him an incredulous look. 

He doesn’t grace you with an answer. Though he doesn’t reek of the putrid smell, you’re still hoping that the answer to that question is yes. Instead of soothing your curiosity, however, he uses the lighter to ignite a spark in the firewood and you guess that it’ll have to do.

“Well, that was quite pathetic,” you comment unhelpfully. 

“Better than Hobi’s attempts and uh, whatever the fuck you were doing.” 

Hoseok is enthusiastic to announce that the bonfire’s ready. You watch the clumsily prepped three tents in disinterest, not bothering to defend your attempt at enchantment to him. “Hoseokie, you’re gonna share a tent with me right?” 

“Hoseokie,” Jin repeats, but in good fun, “I thought you were gonna crash with me tonight?”

You roll your eyes before redirecting your gaze towards Jimin and Jungkook. By the guilty smile Jungkook gives you, you can tell he doesn’t plan on letting Jimin out of his clown clutches. You narrow your expression and jut your lip out disapprovingly. 

“Well, Mr. Handsome,” Jin interrupts whatever you have to say with a thank you, “since you and Kook have been jointed by the assholes since we got here, I don’t see what the problem is.” 

“I think you’re just saying that because you don’t wanna sleep with Tae,” Hoseok comments obliviously. 

“What he said. Also, these crackwhores are planning something, and I’m going to find out what.”

“Well, you’re in tough luck because Hoseok promised,” Jin argues, emphasizing the word promise. He has a shit-eating grin on his face and he’s not even denying your accusation. 

Taehyung coughs once. The second time is overkill and sounds even faker than the first one. “Sorry, but if [Y/n] isn’t comfortable sharing the tent with me, it doesn’t really matter what Hoseok promised.” 

You gape at him. This is probably the first intelligent thing that you’ve heard come out of his mouth. You almost reconsider your treatment of him after that, but then you remember that a guy being half-decent isn’t something you’re supposed to celebrate. You suppose that even he looks like a saint compared to some of your exes.

Everyone notices the conflict on your face but doesn’t say anything about it. Jin admits that Taehyung’s right with a wail yet the tension doesn’t dissolve, somehow. You excuse yourself by declaring that you’re going to get the blankets out of the SUV. 

“Damn, that bad huh?” Jungkook laughs. It’s the hyena laugh that kind of doesn’t suit his face but also the one he does when he’s having fun for no good reason. 

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

“I heard in the girls’ bathroom once that this girl went on a diet where she only eats bananas for three months. Like, five a day,” you explain while you munch on your banana in front of the bonfire. Needless to say, you’ve come out to be severely underprepared in terms of food on your first day. 

“That sounds like a strategy to make yourself unhinged,” Hoseok retorts. He believes your story but he’s skeptical about that banana business. “I’d never do that.” 

“Me neither. Diets are stupid, anyway, can’t a bitch eat?” 

Jungkook reaches over and high-fives you, looking at you like you’ve just invented air or some shit. “Amen to that sister.” 

“By the way, what’s the plan for tomorrow?” Jimin is the one to speak up this time. 

“I have quite the plan for you, alright,” Jin laughs. His next statement, however, is the embodiment of his immature nature. “But that banana talk had me all distracted.”

Everyone collectively groans. You’re not really sure if what he said would classify as a dad joke at this point; you’re now entering single-and-desperate-dad joke territory. Can’t say that you’d enjoy it coming from someone else, but Jin is Jin.

“Anyways,” he dismisses his previous remark with an easy-going smile and a wave of his hand in thin air, “we’re going to a breakfast place first thing in the morning. By foot.” 

His grin is mischievous. You think this is the worst idea he’s had yet and no one else present seems attracted by the prospect of it either, so you vocally oppose him with a raised brow. “Don’t you realize how likely it is we’ll get lost?” 

“Yeah, I also don’t wanna walk too much.” Hoseok’s always one to back you up.

“Technology doesn’t lie, [Y/n].”

“If technology doesn’t lie how come I had a D on my maths test in junior year when I used Photomath?” 

Hoseok agrees, remembering the incident. That day was truly one of sorrow. 

“Technology only lies if you’re gullible enough,” Jin now changes the narrative. 

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

You sneak out of your and Hoseok’s tent with a brief explanation thrown over your shoulder. Something about getting your make-up wipes from the trunk. Hoseok mutters inspiring words of advice—be careful, it’s dark and who knows what animal puke is on the ground—and you stumble your way to the SUV. 

Shoving the keys in the hole proves to be a difficult task, however. You aimlessly jut it in, hoping to hit the correct place by some sort of miracle. This is the moment that you realize that your eyes aren’t so good at adapting to the darkness. 

“Hey, what’re you doing?”

You jump up out of pure reflex. Startled, you whip around with a bemused look on your face. You’re gonna get wrinkles, damn it. 

“Woah, girl jumps in heels,” Taehyung comments dryly. 

“Don’t sneak up on me, you idiot cokehead,” you retort. You’re not sure why you said that. He’s not a cokehead. 

“No, but seriously, what’re you doing?” 

“I’m trying to look for my make-up wipes.” 

Taehyung takes the keys from you. Without half as much fumbling as you’d done previously, he opens the trunk and you proceed with looking through your purse, only to come to the conclusion that you’ve forgotten your make-up lines somewhere. There’s now a new resolve, clear as day in your twisted mind—you have to find the supermarket you passed by on your way here and buy new ones.

“Did you find them?”

“No.” You scoff. An angry thaw and the trunk is now closed. “I’m going to buy some.” 

“Woah, calm down tiger. Can’t you just sleep with it?” 

“No! Do you know how bad that is for your skin?” 

“Well, we could find a river and you could wipe your face with the dirty water.” 

You give him a blank stare, barely suppressing a small giggle. “Do you understand how ridiculous you’re being?” 

“I’m being ridiculous?”

Silence.

“...You’re not planning to go off in the woods during the dawn of asscrack, right?” 

“The what? Yeah.”

Taehyung looks towards your tent only to see that the light is completely shut down. Hoseok must be asleep already. “I’ll go with you.” 

You roll your eyes. “Do whatever you want.” 

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

“So, why do you hate your cousin so much?” Taehyung asks abruptly from behind you. 

Most of your walk has been a silent one, so far, except for an occasional grumble from you and an absentminded one-liner from him. There’s also the sound of sticks crumbling under your high-heels that’s slightly irritating. 

“Because she’s unfunny,” you reply seriously.

“You have issues.” This is probably the least significant reason someone has ever hated somebody else for, in the entire history of hatred. Strangely enough, however, Taehyung can’t help finding it endearing how outlandish you can be.

“I’m sorry, I must have Alzheimer’s because I don’t remember asking,” you snap with a roll of your eyes. 

“You know, I have a dog,” he begins dramatically. “And sometimes he shits on the carpet and one time he puked on me, but I still love him very much. He’s gang, you feel?” 

“I don’t see how that helps with my family situation.”

“I never said it’s supposed to help, I just wanted to talk about myself.” He snickers. You’re getting the most violent of urges. 

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

Leering over the thin metal fence that looms over an otherwise mundane hill gives you an idea. Down the admittedly high hill, the supermarket is obnoxiously lit up. However, the hideous sight doesn’t deter you—this is what your nirvana looks like in the given moment.

With one bold move, you lift your leg up the fence and Taehyung considers you, your motives and perhaps even your life until now. “What are you doing?” 

“It’ll be faster if I go down the hill.” 

“You’re gonna break your ankles in these shoes,” he rebuts, his voice a tilted monotone. “Also, I can see your underwear like this.” 

“Perveeeeert.” This is your final taunt before you do make it over the short fence and onto the other side. Examining the hill from up close—but not before you roll your miniskirt down—you come to two conclusions. The first one is that it’s quite steep and the second one comes when you’re one step down, that maybe, just maybe, you’re a bit deranged.

With your back turned to him, you don’t get to see Taehyung experiencing the five stages of grief. There’s obvious conflict on his face and to be precise, his current dilemma is between worry for you and a lack of power to stop you. Perhaps had you turned around, you’d find the sight entertaining.

His movements are leisurely once he does get in motion. Taehyung’s plan is to simply help you up now that he noticed that you’re hesitating to go further than you’ve already gone. 

His voice cutting through the night’s silence startles you. “Hey, you really shouldn’t do this.” 

You stumble. 

As tragic as that is, there’s something else to placate you; you’ve never seen Taehyung move so fast. Not even during the blip test in high school. The rest of his actions are less endearing—he throws you over his shoulder carelessly, stumbles onto the sidewalk and drops you like it’s hot. And then your legs are a bit wobbly, but you pretend they aren’t. 

The unnerving silence remains all the way to the supermarket, then back to the campsite and even when Taehyung’s awkwardly using his phone as a flashlight in your face while you remove your make-up. There’s nothing to say, except maybe if he were to ask you a question that’s not to your liking.

(He’s not that bad.)

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

Jin is in a hurry, but you’re not sure what for. It’s been practically less than a day since you started this road trip, but it feels longer. You’re conflicted about how to feel regarding that, but even so, Jimin and Hoseok’s enthusiasm is hard to ignore. 

The feline smile on your face drops the moment Jungkook basically drags you out of your tent, bare-faced and severely underdressed. Well, to be honest, you blend in with them just fine, but in your head, you’re severely underdressed. Something more boujee is usually your style, but you realize your predicament won’t magically change the longer you’re walking in what feels like the middle of nowhere. 

Tusla is gross, yes, but maybe Oklahoma is just gross in general. 

When you’re unhappy, you don’t get shy about it��honesty is the best policy, after all. So you’re going on one of those annoying tangents you like to go on like it’s second nature to you. Maybe it is. 

Taehyung drones out whatever it is you’re saying the moment you start talking about a pimple in your nostril that has hair growing out of it. He’s not particularly grossed out by this revelation, rather, he doesn’t like listening to you go on and on about everything you don’t like about yourself. 

“And I couldn’t put on that necklace you got me for my birthday,” you complain before linking your arms with Hoseok’s and feigning a sniff.

“That is pretty horrible,” he hums in agreement. “I think I have a rash on my thigh.” 

“See, if Jungkook wasn’t being horrible I could probably get some kinda product to smear on it.”

Taehyung feigns a loud yawn. Tagging along with you and Hoseok isn’t as tiring as he’d like to make it out to be. 

“What’re you yawning so blatantly for? I hate being interrupted.” You roll your eyes cockily. 

“Sorry, I almost fell asleep during this uninteresting speech of yours.”

You fume again and Hoseok reassures you with something along the lines of don’t worry, [Y/n], it’s very interesting. Then, silence follows. It always seems to end up like this between the two of you. 

“Well, if it helps,” Taehyung starts, tone breezy, “you’re still beautiful.” 

You feel your face heat up. Sure, boys have given you plenty of compliments before—you’re no stranger to it—hot, sexy and maybe pretty on a good day. But beautiful? Especially without any make-up on? This is definitely something new. 

Hoseok smiles. “Yeah, he’s right.” 

You don’t want to admit just how flattered you really are. “Of course I am.”

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

You take the first thing you find to your liking once you reach the breakfast place. Actually, it’s more brunch than it is breakfast, but all that walking is making you starve so you don’t feel particularly inclined to be hung up on semantics. 

“It’s on me.” Jungkook sweeps in smoothly, giving you a flashy smile. 

“Fuck off. I’m still mad at you.”

“You might be, but not for long,” he argues with an obnoxious grin on his face. “They call it… The Kook Effect.” 

You shake your head. “I’m pretty sure you just made that up.”

“Yeah? Remember when you won a bet against Jimin and he had to call you Supreme Majesty in freshman year? And then you pretended that he did it out of his own volition.” 

“Oh, I’m not taking this from you and your dead trim.”

“My trim is fine, thanks.”

“Dead trim!” you repeat, almost frantic. You’re so caught up with Jungkook’s dead trim that you don’t notice that Taehyung is giving you a cheesy smile as he buys you your food. He looks like the greasiest gentleman alive when he hands it to you. 

“And what’s that about?”

“In junior year, at summer camp, they took away our phones because someone recorded the instructor jerking off. And then like, blackmailed him.” 

You quirk an eyebrow up at this, unsure what he’s hinting at. “Right.”

“Right. And then they took all of our phones for a month and you started crying about how your life is a living nightmare.” 

“Right…” you trail off, suddenly embarrassed as if that hadn’t happened a whole two years ago. But like, it totally was a big deal! “The no phone rule was the worst. Even worse than the public bathroom rule.”

“I did it. I’m making it up to you,” he explains. 

You feel your mouth twitch into a small smile, one that he hasn’t quite seen on you before. “I forgive you this once, then.” 

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

“We’re going to a hotel after sightseeing,” Jin explains. It’s like he’s got everything figured out all by himself and perhaps with the help of Jungkook’s annoying personality. “I arranged the rooms and everything while you were eating.” 

“Quite epic,” Jimin comments absentmindedly. “Wait, rooms? Like, you mean who’s rooming with who?” 

“Yeah, I finished the registration.” He stares directly at you and then Taehyung. “You could switch if you wanted to, it doesn’t really matter.”

You give him a light glare, already having a brief idea of what he’s done, but don’t comment any further. With a sense of deja vu, you speak up again. “What about the motel?” 

“I wasn’t sure if we’re going to be passing by one today, so I thought hey! Better safe than sorry.” 

Everyone nods in half-agreement until Jin speaks up again. “Plus, you guys reek. You should shower. Couldn’t be me.”

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

Predictably, Jin did set you and Taehyung up. You can’t tell what kind of game he and Jungkook are playing, however, the poor boy isn’t half as insufferable in your eyes ever since this road trip began, so maybe you should thank them. Still, you don’t trust them—their minds are as twisted as yours.

As the two of you are dragging your luggage towards your shared room, Taehyung reminds you that you’re free to tell him if you don’t want to sleep with him. “I could go to Jungkook’s room or something.”

You find the idea of being alone more unfavorable than you thought you would. Perhaps your high-school, drastically more histrionic, self would’ve found anything more pleasant than sharing a room with Taehyung. You’re a (slightly) changed person now, though. Or at least you’d like to believe you are.

“Let’s put it like this. I hate a lot of things.”

“You don’t need to tell me that, I already know,” he interrupts with a crude giggle. 

“But you’re not one of them,” you admit. 

There’s also the fact that the two of you are blatantly ignoring that you could switch with Jin and sleep with Hoseok instead.

No more words are spoken between the two of you that day. New Mexico isn’t half as bad as Oklahoma was. 

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

You wake up before Taehyung does, punctually so. Rolling out of bed, you partly don’t care whether you wake him but at the same time, you try to avoid making too much noise before slipping into the bathroom. Though you’re definitely one to value your beauty sleep, yesterday’s incident left you paranoid over whether Jungkook or Jin would catch you unprepared. 

You go through your routine calmly and by the time Taehyung goes in the bathroom to take a piss, you’re ready to start doing your make-up. You stare at the foundation in your hand but before you can apply it, you hesitate. 

Do I need make-up to be desirable?

Of course, you’re aware that not all women who use make-up are insecure, or that it’s always necessarily toxic for your self-esteem. And you thought that was the case with you as well, but your doubts suggest otherwise. Swiftly, you put all of your stuff away, stick with your trusty lipstick and nothing else. 

“Morning,” he says, groggy still. 

“Morning.” You look over to him from the corner of your eye and he looks kind of dazed. “Jin says we’re staying here until tomorrow morning.” 

“Cool. Hotel’s nice. The scenery too.” 

“I guess.” 

There’s something cripplingly awkward when the two of you aren’t hurling insults at each other, you realize. 

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

You’re off somewhere with Hoseok and Jin when Taehyung is hanging out with Jimin and Jungkook. Turns out their room has a nice balcony, and with the others out of the picture, there’s some kind of buzzed chatter about incoherent topics swirling around. 

Jungkook suddenly decides that it’s a good idea to start talking about his sexcapades. Maybe it’s the alcohol or maybe his mind’s slipping. Jimin kind of wants to admit how much he doesn’t care what his friend does outside of watching anime and playing video games, but there’s also a part of him that’s morbidly intrigued by Jungkook’s words. Like a dark spell or something. 

“I wanted to hit it off with [Y/n] in high school,” he admits bluntly.

The other two stare at him.

“Oh really? What made you change your mind?” Jimin asks, now more awake than ever. 

“Dunno. Like, she’s more like, the bitchy rival in rom-coms, not the protagonist. I liked her, but I didn’t think I could handle her,” he admits.

“Once we were clubbing and this guy was messing with me and I complained to her about it,” Jimin begins, leaning into his chair with a fond smile on his face, “and she was all like, I’ll show him. And I was like, what? And she was like, I’ll show him who he’s dealing with. And then I was like, okay, maybe don’t show him that much.” 

The three of them chuckle. Taehyung talks for the first time in a while. “Nah, I agree.”

“You dig it though, right?” 

Jimin gives him a knowing look right after Jungkook shoots his question with a drunken smile. He guesses that since Hoseok isn’t here, he can finally admit it. 

“Yeah. Yeah, I do. But I can’t get things right with her.” 

“What do you mean?”

“It’s like, we’re either fighting or it’s really awkward.” 

“You’re on your own.” Jimin dismisses him with a wave of his hand. “I don’t think she hates you that much. It’s always Taehyung this, Taehyung that.” 

“True,” Jungkook agrees. “Like yes, maybe she’s complaining about you half the time and I know she loves gossiping but I’ve never heard her talk about someone else that much. Except maybe Yoongi. What I’m sayin’ is, you should give it a shot.”

“Why do you guys even fight so much?” Jimin laughs. “Whenever it happens, I like, forget what even happened to lead up to that.” 

“Well, you know me. I’m always too honest for my own good and when I hit her with some snark she starts getting all defensive. I just...” He sounds defeated by the time he’s finished with his explanation. Taehyung’s shoulders visibly slump and his frame slides down the uncomfortable chair. “I just want to get along with her.” 

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

The fourth day is the first time you actually aren’t sure where you are. Save for supposedly being close to Nevada by now, you tuned out the rest of Jin’s explanation despite your previous attempts at keeping up with your location. 

Regardless, what’s important is living in the present. And the present for you right now is walking down a nameless street, in a mess of other tourists, with your pants uncomfortably sticking to your ass with sweat. In short, you feel gross. 

Taehyung doesn’t seem to be having the same problem, while you can’t even fake being unfazed. You envy him just the tiniest bit. 

A trashy souvenir shop seems to catch Taehyung’s attention. In the scorching heat and sand-yellow scenery of this town, however, even that seems more appealing. So when he urges you to go with him, you find yourself reluctantly agreeing. 

When you step in, the air conditioning of the otherwise homey shop welcomes you like taking a breather during an overcrowded party. You let an unconscious smile take over your face when you greet the cashier. She’s cute and her adorableness factor only spikes up when she practically beams at the sight of customers. 

“Hi! Please, feel free to look around.” 

“We will,” Taehyung answers offhandedly. Her gaze lingers on him. 

Most of the things don’t interest you. Actually, they’re hideous if you had to be completely honest. He doesn’t seem that enamored by them either, but you can tell he finds more redeeming qualities about them than you do. 

Your eyes almost bulge out of your face when you see the most live-laugh-love-esque decoration to exist. Like something your mom would laugh-react to on Facebook. 

The offender is no more than three inches tall and wide, a ceramic plate with a cartoony burger portrayed on it. It’s holding a flag that says two simple words: “Nice Buns!” 

You can’t tell if it’s the radioactivity of Jungkook’s cooking from earlier or if this thing is what’s making you nauseous. However, food-poisoning or not, you’re quite disgusted by what you’ve just seen. “Oh my god, the caucasity.” 

“Aw, you don’t like it?” Taehyung says with a mocking pout. “I think it’s cute.” 

“What’s wrong with you? It’s corny.”

“No, it isn’t. It might’ve been if it was a corn-dog, though.” 

You heaved an over-dramatic sigh. “You’re saying words that have no positive impact on my life.”

“I think I’ll buy it,” he declares, before checking the price and realizing he hasn’t brought enough money with himself. 

You shake your head. “I’m not gonna be an accomplice to… that.” 

“Well, of course not. This is your Valentine’s present.”

“Go to hell. As if I’d be your Valentine in the first place,” you reply sardonically before pushing him out of the way.  

Taehyung realizes something at that moment. Even outside your evident disinterest in him and his affairs, the two of you are completely incompatible. You, too quick to judge and be offended and him, too quickly to say the first thing on his mind, obviously don’t mesh smoothly. 

Neither of the boyfriends you’ve had that he’s spoken to is anything like him, either. If Namjoon and Yoongi have one thing in common, it’s that they’re both calm, collected and have a good head screwed securely on top of their shoulders. He’s not like that.

Even so, that revelation only makes the concept of being with you more alluring. 

Kim Taehyung is an idiot. But more importantly, with one glance towards the admittedly good-looking cashier making googly eyes at him, Kim Taehyung makes a decision.

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

While you’re taking a shit in a nearby cafeteria, you receive a text from Taehyung. This is shocking by itself since despite the two of you having each others’ numbers, you never really text. 

[15:30] pain in the neck: im going on a date w/ the cashier

[15:30] pain in the neck: feel free to leave

[15:45] Princess Complex: i’m just gonna hang with jungkook thank god

Why is your stomach sinking?

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

Once you meet up with Jungkook, you explain the situation briefly. He quickly looks you over, confusion evident on his face. “What? On a date?”

“Yeah, he just kinda left me in the toilet,” you confirm with a shrug. “Anyways, where do you wanna go?” 

It’s not like Jungkook is an oblivious idiot with the emotional capacity of your aunt’s mutated sixth toe, even if he may appear to be. But you never thought he’d call you out the moment your overly confident facade starts slipping. His gaze softens. “Are you sure you’re okay with that?” 

He isn’t examining you when he asks. No, he appears to be looking off, somewhere behind you. However, you remain ignorant to that fact. 

“Yes! Why would I care? I’d rather drink toilet water for ten years straight than spend any more time with that moron,” you snap, too worked up for someone who supposedly doesn’t care. 

“Is that how you really feel about Taehyung?”

“Yes! Yes, oh my god, let it go.”

Jungkook makes one more helpless expression, shrugs lightly, and you fail to realize that neither of those gestures is directed at you. “Let’s go to the arcade.”

“I’m not really into video games,” you lie as you run your hand through your hair, “but fine.”

“Hell yeah.”

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

When Taehyung goes back to your room in the trashy motel, notably late during the night for a mere first date, the atmosphere is tense. There’s a crease in your brows when you unlock the door and obvious bite marks over your bare lips. He stumbles ahead to enter, but you continue blocking his path with your arms frigidly crossed over your chest.

“You’re late.” 

“And what’s it to you?” He’s never spoken to you so harshly. There are moments where his words bite, but never does he say them with an expression and tone that are so frosty.

“Nothing in particular.” You move out of his way, finally, and he enters. You briefly wonder if he’s had alcohol before you start talking again. “I’ve been stuck in this room for like, an hour because the keys are in me. Waiting for you...”

“Poor you.”

“Excuse me?”

“I heard what you said about me to Jungkook. You know, I’m starting to understand why you scared away all your exes.”

Warth washes over you in waves for a millisecond before it disperses into nothingness, a cold numbness that makes your back shiver. Your gaze on him is empty yet livid at the same time and he cowers under it. You’re not sure if the guilt on his face is a flicker of your imagination or if it’s genuine, but you hope it’s the latter. 

It’s never his words that are a big deal to you. It’s the way he speaks every syllable, so earnestly with truth laced in every letter, that makes you go off the hook. Because deep down, you’re aware that he doesn’t mean to be malicious or to offend, it’s merely him telling his truth.

You grab a few things impulsively with a mundane declaration, before storming off god knows where. “I’m not sleeping here tonight.”

When the door clicks behind your frame, Taehyung backs down and sprawls out across the bed. Truthfully, he regretted his words before he even opened his mouth. But he was so angry, be it with you or with himself.

It just seemed so unfair that you could blow him away time after time and yet, on his date the only thing on his mind was you. The mediocre make-out session and him awkwardly leaving out of nowhere didn’t help, either. And then you had to be so perfect, waiting for him instead of locking his ass out like he thought you would.

It isn’t the girl’s fault she’s raised to be as sweet as sugar while you’re more like citrus. He’s always had a knack for lemons, anyway.

The fact that you spent the rest of the day with Jungkook only aggravates him further, the younger’s words repeating in his head. I tried to hit it off with [Y/n] in high school, or whatever it was that he said exactly. All of this is his own fault, anyway—if he hadn’t been so temperamental, you would’ve stayed with him for the rest of the day.

Taehyung stares at the cheap lights hanging on the ceiling until his eyes hurt that night.

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

Half-way through your trek to Hoseok’s room, you crumble. A sob escapes your throat and then another one. After these two instances, your tears don’t cease. 

At first, Jimin is excited to see you at their door but his smile slips the moment he realizes what a bad state you’re in. You’re practically making whale noises while desperately searching for Hoseok. 

“I’ll give you two a moment.” He gives you one final look-over and leaves with a not-so-threatening threat. “Or maybe thirty. You better be smiling and singing Toxic by the time I’m back, [Y/n].”

Hoseok rushes to hug you. “God, girl, what’s wrong?”

“I like Taehyung.” 

“Is that it? You’re a strong girl, y’know, I never pictured you crying over some pretty boy.” 

“No. I’m crying because I’ve liked him all this fucking time and I tried to run away from him because I’m scared. And he said the most horrible thing to me,” you explain as you bury yourself deeper into his embrace. “That’s why I’m crying.”

“I hope he isn’t allergic to hands, because he’s about to catch them. Actually, I hope he is allergic.” Hoseok isn’t one to ask about details. He lets you get it out of your system, makes a few promises (most often of violence) and then allows you to elaborate if you wish to do so.

You laugh, but it turns into choking considering how much snot you have running down your face by now. “He said that he understands why my exes run away from me. I mean, I— I said something rude about him first, but Jungkook was backing me into a corner and I didn’t know he would even find out about it, I just—”

“Forget about him, forget about Jungkook, everyone. Tonight is for Britney,” Hoseok commands more than he asks you.

You smile sadly at him before uselessly wiping your tears away and giggling like you’re on the brink of losing your mind. Perhaps you are.

“My 45-carat booger. Hey, let’s make Jimin do the chicken dance,” Hoseok starts off like he’s coddling you in his strange way of doing so, but then quickly turns diabolical. He throws some tissues at you and you accept them. If there’s one thing you’re truly grateful for, it’d be your best friend.

You nod, suddenly more excited than you should be. Hoseok’s right—you don’t need some pretty boy when queen Britney is watching over you.

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

The next day, you’re wearing a full-face of make-up, and Taehyung notices it. Hoseok’s driving and you’re in the passenger seat, talking about some nonsense as usually do. The atmosphere is light, with Jimin and Jungkook occasionally joining in your conversation and Jin sleeping with his forehead pressed against the window.

Truth to be told, Taehyung feels like a zombie right now. Pretending that your scuffle with him meant nothing to you only convinces him further how little you care about anything that has to do with him.

“I think we’ll be in Las Vegas soon,” Hoseok announces cheerily.

On one hand, you’re happy to finally be seeing the end of this road trip. Though you’ve technically just been relaxing, you wanted to be done with your cousin’s dumb wedding and go back to spending an average amount of time with your friends. You want to forget how flippant things are between you and Taehyung, your quote-unquote friendship dictated by mood swings rather than actual feelings.

“Fuck yeah! I wanna get drunk in Vegas,” you say with a smirk. “It’s on my bucket list.”

“Really?” 

“Yeah.”

“You want to get drunk everywhere,” Jungkook corrects with a laugh. You can’t help agreeing with him. “And Jin will probably stay in the hotel and play Candy Crush or something.”

“Ew, ew, ew, a fucking millenial,” you exclaim in mock disgust.

“Jin can be a beast if he wants to. Remember when he twerked in front of the whole school on Taehyung’s birthday party?”

“Shit was wild, man.”

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

No one except you, Hoseok and Taehyung himself is aware of what transpired yesterday. So Jungkook and Jin are still stubbornly placing the two of you together, yet you’re too powerless to fight it.

The hotel is a fancy one, courtesy of your annoying cousin. She’s been texting you and you sent a short message back to inform her you’ve arrived, but you haven't bothered to deal with her provocations any further. 

After dumping his luggage near his bed, Taehyung was straight out of the room and you started getting ready. And that was that. 

You feel more like yourself when you find the wine hidden in the fridge, a free present from the hotel. Or maybe your cousin’s way of making peace. Ha, as if that’d happen. 

When Taehyung comes back to get dressed, you’re already tipsy and acting like a fool.

“Drinking already?” There are many things that Taehyung wants to say to you. An apology he’s too sober to say and a confession you’re too drunk to hear, to begin with. 

“It’s pre-game,” you explain dizzily. “You know. I never told you why I hate my cousin so much. She used to bully me and she stole my first boyfriend from me. And we never got past it.”

With your trademark look, high-heels, acrylics, a fancy yet revealing dress along with whatever else you consider fashionable at the moment, Taehyung feels familiarity staring at your lopsided smirk. Though he’s gotten glimpses of other sides of you during these past few days, like how you like cuddling during the night, this is the epitome of who you are.

“Yeah,” he replies agreeably, though you’re not sure what for.

“Well, I don’t know about you, but Hoseok is waiting for me. So, this is bye-bye.” 

“See you there.”

“Probably not.” You snicker. Taehyung can tell that you’re still upset with him.

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

You’re so wasted that the things happening around you aren’t really making sense anymore. While you and Hoseok were drinking together for a while, at one point Jungkook whisked him away, then there’s a blank in your memory and now you’re here. Alone. And you’ve lost count of how many drinks you’ve had. 

A man, that’s definitely a few years older than you, finally approaches you after observing you from afar. He says some sort of sleazy line—you’re not sure what it is, you’re not really listening—and offers you a drink. 

You consider him. He’s not your type at all and that pornstache isn’t helping his case but, when you look at Taehyung and see him talking and having fun while you’re being an alcoholic by your lonesome and moping about him, you quickly accept his offer. Pornstache or not. 

“Pick anything you’d like, kitten,” he purrs, in an attempt at being seductive. 

“Well first off I’m not a furry so don’t call me that,” you snap with a self-assured grin. And then you start listing off the most expensive drinks on the menu. 

This man is so enamored by you that he buys you all of them. You’re three steps closer to alcohol poisoning when you clumsily stumble onto the dance floor along with him, running your hand over his jaw in what you believe to be a sensual manner. He seems to dig it, but from an outsider’s perspective the two of you look like junkies trying to get off. 

Your experience in the club is romanticized. The dim lights are reminiscent to those few times you’ve gone to a rave and it reeks of alcohol, overpriced perfumes and sweat. You and your nameless pathetic fan mingle with the grinding crowd and begin imitating them. 

As the poet Lady Gaga once said, “redlight pornographic dance fight”. 

The act itself is indifferent to you. From across the room, Taehyung locks eyes with you and you’re not really sure why but you feel this sudden need to provoke him, even when you know he most likely wouldn’t care. You sloppily kiss your suitor’s cheek while looking at him intensely from across the room. A red trail from your wet lips makes its way down his face.

For the sake of pettiness, you might’ve gone further—I mean, you were already playing some weird game of tug-and-war but with clothes—but you don’t want to know the feeling of this guy’s lips against yours. He finds the mostly innocent action as an invitation, though, and abruptly halts your staring contest with Taehyung by forcing you into a greedy kiss.

Pushing him away, you give him a pointed stare and rejection is clear on his face. “Excuse me…” 

He’s a terrible kisser. 

Pushing through everyone that’s in your way, you make your escape through the first door you find. In your intoxicated parade, you fail to make sense of the words ‘CLOSED’ that are so blatantly taped over the entrance. So, you find yourself in front of a swimming pool. 

The cold breeze outside prickles at your skin unpleasantly, and a quick look around tells you that there’s no one around to put this in their cringe compilation. Apparently more disgusted than you’d initially thought, you puke your guts out in front of the pool. Now light-headed and somehow empty, you stare at your vomit and take a deep breath. 

“Hey, why’d you run away?” Your suitor from earlier appears to have followed you outside. You stare at your feet—doesn’t he understand that you wanted to get away from him?

“You’re a bad kisser,” you say bluntly after getting over your little trance. 

“Give me a chance to change your mind then,” he offers smugly, taking menacing steps towards you. You move away instinctively before you’re quickly backed into a wall, with his two hands trapping you in between. 

Your eyes widen with fear and you sink into yourself. If you had anything else to puke out, you’re sure you would’ve done so at this point. “I have sharp nails and I’m not afraid to use them.”

“Oh, she bites-”

The events that play out next happen so slowly, you’re not sure why you’re surprised. Taehyung appears, and you do see him in your peripheral vision, stares for a bit before knocking the guy out with a punch to his temple. He falls unconscious on the ground.

“Oh god, did I kill him?” he asks, a vacant look on his face. He imagined his first kill to be more thrilling, but on second thought, he’s not sure why he was thinking about that without being under the influence of substances in the first place. 

“I’d be happy if he’s dead, if that helps,” you comment dryly. 

“Do we dump the body in the pool or what?”

The two of you are drunk enough to consider it. Your mind is blank for a bit, before you finally speak up. “I’m trying to think of what I saw on How To Get Away With Murder, but it’s not coming to me. But like, on Blacklisted, there was this guy who like, made the corpses turn to gas or something!”

“You watch too much TV. Also, I’m pretty sure it’s called The Blacklist.”

“Whatever. Do you know how to do that?”

“No.”

“Hey, what’s going on here?” A new voice cuts in.

“You better come up with something convincing or we’ll have to kill him too,” you urge.

“Did you say something?”

“No.”

“Umm, awkward believe it yeah,” Taehyung begins, a strong start. “This guy slipped on her puke and hit his head. And he has a concussion now.”

“Man, that sucks,” the guy says. You’re relieved that he’s as trashed as he is, otherwise the situation would’ve went really badly, considering how Taehyung straight-up lied to his face. “I’ll go call someone over ‘ere.”

Once he’s out of sight, the two of you stare at each other and decide to flee the country. But then change the plan with the more economically-efficient idea to simply leave the club. 

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

“Why were you with that guy anyway?” Taehyung asks. Frankly put, neither of you know where you’re going, but you’re boldly leading him through the artificially-lit streets of Las Vegas as if you’re born there. Where you end up is a concern your sober selves of tomorrow should worry about.

“I wanted to make you jealous,” you reply, bold, like everything you do when you’re drunk is. 

“...I don’t get it.”

“You pissed me off so much yesterday. And you made me jealous when you went out with that cashier. But also, you killed a guy for me, so I guess I’m not mad at you anymore.” 

“Well aren’t you high-maintenance,” he retorts sarcastically, gaining what feels like a confidence spurt because of your sudden confession. “You don’t have anything to be jealous of, anyway. The only thing I had on my mind during that stupid fucking date was you.”

You freeze up. You thought that your own attitude was what made any possibility of him returning your feelings seem laughable. Even if it’s drunk blabber, alcohol is an honesty elixir, at least in your case. “Kiss me?” 

He doesn’t need to be told twice, attacking your lips so eagerly you’d consider it funny if you were in a right state of mind. Still, your reciprocation is just as hungry, so maybe you don’t have any room to laugh. He is indulging you, after all.

The wipeout that happened at the club happens again and you’re left to wonder how things escalated. From teeth clashing against each other in pure excitement, you’re left hovering over Taehyung’s form and straddling him unsteadily.

He reaches under your already high dress and the glimpse of your panties seems to excite him. “You have no idea how much I’ve thought about this,” he admits breezily. 

You smile, a teasing one, adjusting yourself better. “You don’t need to be so dramatic about it, it’s just underwear.” 

“Dramatic is how many times I’ve jerked off after we went to the supermarket and you flashed me.”

“Ewwww, we shared a bed like three times, freak,” you scold and he pouts when you distance yourself from him. 

“I was just trying to be funny!”

“Not funny. Didn’t laugh. It’s better when you don’t talk,” you instruct before leaning down again to kiss him. At least he’s having fun with groping whatever he can get his hands on. 

“You’re so annoying it turns me on. Always whining, it drives me nuts how much I really like you.”

You snicker. “Well, I sure am feelin’ the love here.”

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

When you wake up, you register three things. Four, actually. First—your left shoe is missing. Second— Taehyung is knocked out cold next to you. Third—you don’t know where you are, except for the fact that there’s a garbage bin next to you. Fourth—your head is throbbing with pain and you’re so sore you’re not sure if you can walk. Needless to say, you had the wild night in Vegas you wished for in your bucket list, and you only half-regret it.

You see your shoe discarded near you and nudge it with your toe for a bit before finally gathering enough power to sit up and put it on. Or so you think, because the moment you’re propped in a standing position, you vomit like you did yesterday. 

Speaking of yesterday, the only thing you remember is that you and Taehyung were convinced that he’s now a murderer on the run, confessing your feelings for each other in an anti-climactic manner and then having like seven rounds of public sex. 

With a recap of yesterday’s events, you digress and put your shoe on before reaching in your purse. Surprisingly, you haven’t been robbed. Fishing your phone out, you come to the conclusion that you’ve been knocked out cold for way too long. 

Hoseok has generously spammed you with seventy texts, but you don’t bother to read them, already assuming that the gist is something about where the fuck you and Taehyung are. Instead, you call him immediately. 

“Hi,” you greet casually.

“[Y/n]! Where the fuck are you and Tae? We were so worried. Jin almost declared you two missing. But on the positive side, Jungkook didn’t care because he got food poisoning yesterday at the club.”

“I don’t know where we are, but he’s with me.”

“What do you mean?!”

“I’ll send you my location. I don’t have money for Uber, love you, kisses and hickeys,” you say in one breathe before hanging up quickly and doing what you said you’d do. 

At first, you thought this road trip was an opportunity for you to grow and mature. However, after yesterday’s shenanigans, you’re almost convinced your sociopathic tendencies are now higher by 5%. 

You start shaking Taehyung until he wakes up and swats your arms away. Now upon closer inspection, while you’re aware that you look bad right now, he’s not looking too hot either. The lipstick marks you had left on his face make it look like you’ve either slobbered all over him or that he’s a vampire, you’re not sure. And you’ve bitten him so much somebody could think he got attacked by a racoon judging solely on those bruises.

You quickly explain the situation to him as you’re fixing up your bra and top. Considering the fact that you were bordering on nip-slip territory, that was your priority. Smoothing your dress is easy enough, but your pantyhose is mysteriously ripped in some incriminating places.

He reaches out, rips out the fake eyelash that was pathetically hanging off the corner of your eye and throws it away. You take care of the other one, wipe off your ruined make-up and then wipe off the lipstick on his face. 

Your head hurts so much that you don’t know what to say to break the silence. Though you also don’t doubt that he’s in the position, and so, for the first time it doesn’t feel awkward between the two of you. 

“Hey, [Y/n], are we like… dating now?”

“I think so? You can be my date to the wedding if you want.” 

A dopey smile takes over his face. You realize you’ve made someone this happy before with merely being yourself. It fills you with a kind of warmth you’ve never felt before.

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

“Your cousin won’t stop calling you,” Taehyung emphasizes as you’re pointedly ignoring your ringtone while you get ready. Considering the atrocious state both of you came back in, the process taking longer than usual shouldn’t be a surprise. Especially since you had to take turns for the shower.

Also the part where the two of you got into a fight over who should go in first—your thesis being arguably stronger once you mentioned the mud ingrained in the left sole of your feet—only slowed you down further.

“I know right? Can’t this pregnant moron get a life.”

“No, I think she’s calling you because we’re late to the wedding,” he elaborates. “You should pick up.”

“But I hate her!”

“You can roast her at the wedding and I’ll hype you up if you do what I ask.”

“Oh my god, promise?” 

“Promise.”

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

“Look who finally showed up,” your cousin greets you with a tight smile. You can only return the sentiment as Taehyung dumbly trails behind you. 

Well, as much as you don’t like your cousin, the wedding is certainly nice. With a light atmosphere and a fancy ceremony, he can’t pretend he hates it—that much is certain. Though he can also tell that it’s a lot of money wasted on food that doesn’t look appetizing in the slightest the more he examines the buffet.

“I see you’re not wearing the dress I shipped to you. Is it too tight, perhaps?” She’s smiling fakely and sweetly as she waits for your answer to her provocation. Of course it’s too tight; what else could it be when she picked it two sizes smaller than what you usually wear. And she did it on purpose too.

Despite the rather mundane conversation happening, the tension is thick.

“I’m going to be quick. You look like a greasy manatee.” You give her your own uptight smile before strutting away, cueing Taehyung to follow after you.

“Pregnancy-shameeeeed,” he yells out as he offers her finger guns and speed-walks in your direction. 

Once he’s caught up with you, he speaks up again. “I know you could’ve been more brutal than that.”

“Oh please, I’m sophisticated, I’d never engage in some barbaric behavior.”

You both burst out laughing at your blatant lie. 

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

“Do you think they’re dating now?” Jin asks, looking at the two of you as you dance and joke around. Though he imagines that you could only be having a deranged conversation, one that isn’t as sweet and lovey-dovey as it might look from an outsider’s perspective, it’s still quite disgusting how smitten Taehyung looks with you. 

“I don’t care,” Jungkook answers. Him saying he doesn’t care is a metaphor for how much he doesn’t care about anything after his food poisoning.

Jimin rolls his eyes. “Oh definitely. I saw them making out near a garbage dumpster when we were driving back to the hotel.”

Seokjin chokes.

[ju1ian]

this is a very long post about an OC i wrote for Fallout New Vegas.

i never got around to actually laying out Julius’ whole story line, and i don’t think i ever will, so im gonna summarize it. (it ended up being kinda long sorry) im gonna put it under a read more but idk what that means for mobile users, please forgive me. blacklist ‘fonv’ or ‘Courier: Julius’ if you don’t wanna see this.

-gets shot by Benny -wakes up in Goodsprings with absolutely no memories, no name, and INT. 1 -sets out on a journey motivated by nothing else other than finding Benny and killing him. -meets Vulpes in Nipton, likes him a lot. has no idea what or who The Legion is. -meets Arcade in Freeside after getting stabbed, likes him a lot too. (these are conflicting interests.) -stays in Freeside for a short while helping people (the kings, the followers, etc.) forms a strong friendship with Arcade. -makes it to The Strip, kills Benny, finishes his delivery, tells House to fuck off. -travels back to The Fort to meet with Ceasar and see Vulpes again, brings Arcade. -Caesar gives him the name Julius. Vulpes gives him a Legion brand on his left shoulder blade. (this is important for later) -becomes very attached to Vulpes (has a strong romantic interest in him), forms a father-son like bond with Caesar, easily becomes a stand in for Joshua Graham in Caesars life except a whole lot dumber. (extreme endurance and blood lust.) -relationship with Arcade becomes strained to the point that Arcade decides to break things off and abandon him. -kills Arcade to stop him from leaving him, falls into a depression.  -takes work with the Happy Trails Caravan to distract himself from how upset he is, doesn’t tell anyone he’s leaving. -meets Joshua Graham in Zion, they are similar but very different.  -Joshua tries to get him to leave, because he reminds him too much of Ceasar and the Legion, but Julius refuses, and explains why he can’t go home. -spends a lot of time with Joshua Graham, learns about God, doesn’t really understand it, but he likes him. quickly forms a father-son like bond with Joshua as well. In this time, he works though his regret and depression surrounding Arcade’s death. -helps defeat the While Legs, but doesn’t let Salt Upon Wounds be spared. -tries to convince Joshua Graham to come back to the Mojave with him because he needs him, but Joshua refuses. (he stills gives him a set of those sweet clothes though) -before he leaves, Joshua urges him to try and reevaluate his choices concerning Caesar and the Legion. -returns to the Mojave and The Fort in those sweet ass clothes. Everyone thought he was dead. -tells Vulpes and Caesar about his cool trip. Caesar thinks it’s bittersweet. Vulpes thinks it’s stupid. -gets sent on a recon mission at Camp Mccarran, where he comes into contact with his sister who he has no memory of. She is an NCR soldier.  -she tries to talk to him, using his real name, which is Marc-Antony. she reveals to him that they were both NCR soldiers, but he left due to being tired of the NCR’s ways. -he has no memory of this, and doubts it as fact. however, she reveals to him that they both has NCR tattoo’s on their left shoulder blades.  -when she tries to show him this, she finds that his has been branded over with the Legion bull. by telling him this, he realizes Vulpes knew the whole time that he was former NCR, and didn’t tell him.  -he still tries to deny that his sister is telling him the truth, and leaves Camp Mccarran with unwanted information, and a migraine. -over the next few weeks, he starts to get more unwanted memories about his life, and starts to pull away from Vulpes and Caesar, no longer trusting them. he believes they have used him as a blank slate because he was without memories and willing to comply with whatever they wanted from him. -regains full memories of his life as Marc-Antony, and can’t reconcile that with the life he’s been living as Julius. this leads to him abandoning his place at the Fort and hiding out in the Mojave while he tries to make sense of his life. -while hiding out, he get’s the Mysterious Radio Broadcast on his pip boy and decides to investigate it, ends up in Big MT.  -gets lobotomized by the scientists there. -has a lot of time to reflect on his life and his choices while trying to find a way out of Big MT. -once he finally helps the scientists, and settles things between the Think Tank and Mobius, he decides to ask them if they can remove his memories before they give him his brain back. -they comply, and he decides to rid himself of the memories of Marc-Antony’s life, deciding he was much happier as Julius, in his life with Vulpes and Caesar. -returns to the Fort, where everyone thought he was dead once again.  -Vulpes is especially happy to see him back to his old self, and not distant like he had been before he disappeared. -Caesar sends him to battle at the Hoover Dam. They win.  -he lives a relatively happy life with Vulpes for a few years. -due to his incredibly bad karma, one day while he’s partaking in his favorite drink Sunset Sarsaparilla, he accidentally drops a bottle of it on the ground, the cap flies off and hits him in the forehead, killing him instantly. 

-important notes that would be explained further in detail if i ever actually wrote this in depth like i want to- -Julius is compelled to collect eyeglasses. this is because Marc-Antony actually needs glasses to see clearly, Julius just thinks the world is a bit blurry. -Julius adds Arcade’s eyeglasses to his collection once he is dead. -Julius routinely sends Joshua Graham letters from the Fort once he returns, but Joshua never writes back.  -Julius favorite food is Radscorpion Venom Casserole, but he can almost never eat any because he chews on the inside of his cheeks. -Once he gets those clothes from Joshua Graham, he never takes them off.

[sootcloak]

Crow’s Shadow: Carrion Circle

Second part of a short serial installment I’m working on as a general exercise on plotting, editing and the like. You can find the other parts linked here - {Part One: Repair Required} - I’ll add the last link once Part Three is up. Same spoiler warnings as Part One apply. Same general content warnings apply.

~2400 words, featuring Hilda the Mongrel and Rostnthal the Reborn. Centered around a tense cross country trip, and the looming specter of a dangerous foe. Twelve help me I’d hoped I could fit more of the plot into this one the last part is gonna be so long, such a pain to edit.

A cold, mountain spring cuts through the highlands. The water runs babbling over old, long-smooth stones. Along its bank, a cart is still. A pair of chocobos sleep, curled in on one another. Bright yellow feathers pool starkly against the grey and white of the highland’s snow-covered earth.

The campfire, dim and growing colder by the minute, pops and sizzles in the moonlit dark. Every few moments, the earth rumbles with a heavy snore from deep in Rostnthal’s chest. The old Sea Wolf is leaned up against the back of one of the birds, a canvas sheet thrown over both he and the chocobo. Hilda lies beneath the cart itself, nestled up in a tight ball of quilts and jackets.

In the back of the cart, Vavara rifles through the packed supplies. She loads specially marked shells into her revolver. It’s reflective white metal glints in the moonlight. It has a mirror shine in the dead of night, it’s engravings doing little to break up the perfect polish she’s maintained. It is a slow process, painstaking with just one hand. The cartridges hum and vibrate in their chambers, the ether concentrate within nervously singing to her heightened hearing.

Six shots in each cylinder.

If he’s there, it’ll take at least fifteen of these to break his barrier. Even with aether-charged rounds, the inadequacy of her armaments hangs over her. Missing an arm means choosing between her spear and a firearm. Damaged as she is, she might not even have enough aether at her disposal to ignite the spearblade.The core nested between her lungs is pressed cold and stark against her heart, like a long-dull knife. Her soul, nestled within it’s crystal depths, aches from long-faded scars. Her whole body would be a treasure trove for him, secrets to decipher, power to steal. Weapons to wield.

Even then, measured against his life - her secrets, her safety, all things are cast into the pot.

--

She loads a spare cylinder with slow, committed strokes. It’ll take a long time to reload the weapon, even with this preparation.. She didn’t pick this hand, but she’ll play it till the cards are on the table. Folding was never an option, anyways.

Light falls on the small camp, the morning sun casting light into the narrow crevice beneath the cart. Hilda wakes up with a yawn. Her arms stretch across the dirt, eyes squeezed shut. She growls softly deep in her chest, and sits up. Her forehead slams into the wood with an audible crunch.

“Seven hells-” She snarls.

“Gyahah!” Rostnthal’s laughter echoes over the small glade, watching with a gleaming eye as she clutches her forehead.

“‘Ey, Ashenheart! I won! Ye’ owe me a drink when we get back!” His grin is audible, a chuckle reverberating in his voice.

“I never agreed to playing your game.” Vavara says. “Besides, I owe you more than a drink if we all return safely.”

“Heh. Humorless. What with ye’ hangin with the Scions lately, thought you may’ve lightened up some. Guess even they can’t get ye’ out’a that shell.” His voice is no less mirthful, seemingly unfazed by her chilled tone.

“A’ight, come get yer food. Breakfast’s done.” He slaps the side of the kettle, ringing loud and full. Still groaning and clutching a bloodied face, Hilda drops into a cross-legged sit besides Rostnthal.

They goad and poke at one another, the words fading into white noise as Vara sits atop the cart.Her eyes’ light dims, old, ash-soaked memories rising from the shadows of memory. A wave of nauseating nostalgia hits her in the gut.

“You not eating?” Hilda prods Vara with an empty bowl. The old, smoke-scented memories submerge into the dark again. 

“Not right now. I had hardtack before you two were up.” She pushes herself up to her feet, her arm stretching, slight shoulders squaring for a moment under the winter overcoat.

“I’ll get the birds ready while you two eat. We need to move soon.” Her footsteps crunch in the snow as she walks away. A hanging tension in the air slowly seeps into the air as she walks away.

“Y’know,” Rostnthal calls out, voice low and rumbling. “Ye’ still haven’t told us where we’re goin’. Or anything else of substance, really.”

“Yes,” She says as she hoists the barding onto one of the birds. She glances over her shoulder, eyes dimly glowing with an unnatural, cold light in the shadow of the brim of her cap. “I am aware.” The words are biting, dismissive.

“D’ye intend for us to go into whatever trouble is brewing blind?” His tone is calm and grim, his one, good eye locked on hers.

“I do.” She returns his gaze, ironclad.

“An’ if that means things get bloodier than they ‘ad to?”

“It won’t. I can’t protect you on the battlefield. Not in my condition.” She turns away, leading the chocobos to the cart’s front. She clips their barding in, the ‘coos’ and ‘kwehs’ of the birds giving her occasional pause to double check her work.

“So you won’t be there.” She says without turning. “I’ll be leaving you and the birds out of danger. When my student finds you, you’ll take him to Dragonhead.” 

“Wait, what?” Hilda pauses halfway between bites, eyes narrowing. “I came out here to help, not to be a damned taxi. You’re not traipsing off on your own, ‘specially not after all your talk about this fucker who’s hunting you.”

“You want to help?” Vara’s grip on the wood tightens, words turning venomous. “Then I’ve told you how. You want to die? Then go on, follow me after we part ways.”

“Oh, that’s rich.” Hilda’s tone sours, “What’s your deal? We went over this on our first day out, and now half a week in you’re changing your tune? We know it’s dangerous, we get it.”

She sets her half-finished meal aside, standing up. Her hands come to rest on her hips, Rostnthal’s eye moving to rest on her.

“We signed on for this. We knew it’d get bloody, we knew it’d be a close thing. Y’think we’ve not learned to read you? That we were blind to what we were getting into?” She says, defiantly staring down at Vavara.

“So you’re going to ride in and save the day? Vanquish the bad man with your shiny gun and sporty marksmanship? You think you have what it takes to stand against  a man who’s decided he’d rather be a demon?” Vavara takes a deep, steadying breath. There’s something about the question which makes Rostnthal’s hairs stiffen. The skin on the back of his arms and back prickles. He’s still watching Hilda, a blooming anxiousness slowly taking up more space in his chest. He pushes the feeling down.

“Wouldn’t have stepped up if I didn’t think I could help” Hilda says, “An’ I may not be some vaunted champion of the realm like those you’ve been keepin’ the company of, but I-”

“You sound like a child. Too busy playing hero to see the danger you’re in.” Vavara’s chiding words cut through her momentum.

“What do you believe you are wagering? Your life? That in failure, you would die?” Her laugh is a single, wrenching cough. “This isn’t a battle of life and death. I’d sooner shoot myself in the head than allow any of those ‘vaunted champions’ to face him. Even the Warrior of Light, no especially the Warrior of Light.

“He does not kill. He captures. And those he captures become another one of the Empire’s experimental weapons. You would not die, you would become a monster to be sicked on your allies, your friends, and your loved ones.

“So I will face him alone. And you two will ensure an innocent boy does not become a monster because my past came to call. And if after hearing that, you still want to be the hero? Fine. You can be like all the others before you and die like one, too.” Her voice nearly chokes at the end. Shoulders tense, she pushes out a hoarse, whistling breath.

“I’ll do what I do best. Survive. And whatever I have to do to make sure he gets through this too? I’ll pay that price. Worry about yourself.”

“Vavara.” Rostnthal says, leaning in. “What’s so important about this kid that yer so concerned about ‘im getting captured.”

“Nothing. He’s just-” She begins, only for him to hold up one hand to silence her.

“Ye’ never go this far ‘just because’. I’ve seen ye’ in the ‘eat of battle. Cuttin losses ‘as never been somethin’ yer averse to. Even with lives. So if this kid is a hazard to himself more than anyone else, I reckon ye’d try and save him, sure. But to be willin’ to train and tutor a complete greenhorn, let alone throw yerself into the fire for ‘im?? Doesn’t add up.”

He waits. His eye locked on her back, her greying, braided hair shifting with a breeze. Hilda glances between the two, silence bubbling and steaming with tension.

“He is Blessed.” She speaks with a hushed admission, her voice accompanied by an undercurrent of choked, hissing metal.

“And from my observations, he has an aptitude for its power rarely seen. But he is young, foolhardy. I took him in because he otherwise would have found the Scions. And I refuse to see them make another martyr.” She glances back to the other two, over her good shoulder.

“His power will invite controversy and challenge, especially if he cannot wield it. And should Llain capture him, the prospect of an anti-eikon weapon imbued with the power of the Echo is a looming threat I cannot risk. If he can wield the Echo, if he learns how to use it to reinforce his sense of self and being, then he would retain his sanity through any kind of augmentation. Any kind of torment.” Her hand reaches up and rests flat against her chest, claw-tipped fingers scraping against the cloth and leather of her coat. 

“His soul could reside in even steel and crystal, and be unharmed by the process. But if he is captured before he learns to understand and wield the Echo, he could well become a weapon of terrifying power. An incarnation of death made manifest in steel and ceruleum.”

“I refuse to be the mother of death.” She says, softly, almost-inaudibly.

Rostnthal opens his mouth to speak, but the glare he receives from her in return stifles him for a moment.

“None of that changes what you must do. I trust you enough to determine your own path, if you will not heed my warnings. I will tell you what you need to know, even if it is not all you want to know.”

“No, it does change what we need to do. Whether you think so or not.” Hilda says, her confidence returning.

“That kid. What’s his name?” She asks, eyes fixed on Vavara’s.

“Tahve’ir.”

“Well, he’s going to need a teacher still, by your tone. So getting him out isn’t enough. I’ve got to make sure you both get out.”

“And if you can’t?” Vavara says as the two share a long, grim stare.

“Then I get him out, and come back for you. You said he doesn’t kill, and I doubt he can make it back to Garlemald in a single night. So, we get Tahve’ir out, and if you get caught in the meantime, I’ll run back and get you out in the night.”

“Nah.” Rostnthal’s voice rumbles softly, quietly. “Ye’ ain’t got experience with that kinda work. I’ve ran with the yellow jackets and the like, bustin’ slave rings and smashin’ smugglin’ ops. If she gets caught and we have to pull out, I’ll go. An’ you’ll take the kid.” He looks towards Hilda, a confident spark in his eye.

“Alright. Best not mess it up, y’old drunkard.” Hilda says, she cocks a nervous grin and playfully jabs his arm. He just chuckles grimly.

“So you won’t heed my warnings.” Vavara’s voice is distant, a kind of shrill, haunting whistle riding under the injured voice. “It always happens like this.”

“Chin up.” He says, crossing the distance between himself and her in a few steps. He drops to one knee, and rests one hand on her shoulder. He grips her softly, confidently.

“I’m not ignorin’ what ye’ said. We can’t win in a direct fight? Then we’ll just have to run ‘im ‘round the bush. Keep ‘im guessin’. Keep ‘im dazed. We’ll work on strategies on the way there.” He takes a deep breath, and then stands. He climbs into the driver’s seat.

“Have faith.” He says, patting the birds with a solid, steady palm. “‘Ave faith, an’ all will be well. Besides. Yer not meant t’look so glum. Doesn’t suit yer’ image. Times like these, a snarl’s better.”

She just takes a deep breath, steadies herself, and nods.

She jumps up into the back of the cart as Hilda finishes dumping the last bits of the kettle, and scooping her bowl back up into one hand. The dinnerware sack lands in the back with a cataclysmic, chaotic crash.

As soon as her boots are fixed upon the wood, Rostnthal whips the reins and the birds kick up dust as they run.

--

The sun sinks back low in the sky again. Pale-red light streaks across the untamed mountains between Ishgard and Ala Mhigo.

A small shack with a sprawling, chaotic garden sits on a low, narrow plateau. Heavy, metal boots scratch into the wet, snow-melt fed earth. A man with sandy skin, a straight back and strong shoulders stands at the edge of the homestead. His hair is neatly, painstakingly pulled into a long, salt and pepper braid. It rests on his armored pauldrons, and hangs down to his waist. His eyes, a gilded, ember orange, take in the small, humble abode.

In one hand, he holds a thick, angular blade. It’s gunmetal edge reflects no light, despite the bright morning. Coarse and rough, like a painted, sharp thorn of ink clutched tight.

In the other, he holds a stark, shining revolver. It’s pearly white metal casts myriad colors onto the ground around him, and up onto his own blackened platemail. 

In the light of dusk, his aura shines bright and ethereal around him. Dancing, half-there reflections in intangible glass.

He takes a deep breath, and cracks a cheery grin His shadow stretches over the gardens in the evening light. He can smell the faintest hint of ceruleum in the air.

“Finally. Progress.” His smile is all teeth and ambition.

[shankmyman]

Frank roams Ormond, taking some time to think. He tosses his knife into a tree and it sticks by the blade.

A small startled yelp could be heard from behind the tree. A long, scaly, blue and orange spotted tail was visible from the side of the base of the tree. Frank narrows his eyes and goes to grab it, peeking around the side of the tree. A 5'5 blue and orange lizard could be seen behind the tree. She wore some weird dark blue clothing. The lizard looked fairly confused about... everything.

Frank smirks. "Hello there. Are you lost~?" He apologizes for almost hurting her.

"Hi! My names shuya!" Shuya exclaimed, "I am quite lost! Where am i? And whats your name?" Shuyas tail was wagging side to side.

He smiles at her, removing his mask.

"I'm Frank. It's a pleasure to meet you. You're in the realm of the entity now. Welcome~"

"Hi frank! Whats the entity? What is this place? What's on your neck?" Shuya asked, she seemed to be chock-full of questions and she didn't seem to sense franks flirty nature. Frank tries his best to explain.

"This is Ormond. Not sure what the entity is-it's kind of like a god. This thing on my neck is a tattoo."

"Whats a tattoo? Why am I here? Why am I asking so many questions?" Shuya asked, shuya obviously had a couple screws loose in her noggin.

Frank sighs softly, explaining as much as he knew to her.

"Alright! My knowledge is quenched for now!" Shuya exclaimed, "this place is weird. Thats a cool knife. Why is it so cold here?"

Frank doesn't bother to answer her question on why it's cold, hoping that the landscape of snow would give her all the knowledge she needed. Shuya looked at the ground.

"Oooooh! Its snowy! I don't like it. I'm really cold. Is there anywhere thats warm and comfy?" Shuya asked frank. Frank takes her hand and leads her into the lodge, where a massive bonfire is burning in the middle of the floor. Joey is smoking weed (as usual) Julie is sitting around with Susie and humming softly.

Shuyas eyes went wide before she ran over to the fire and sat down right in front of it. Her tail was wagging like a fucking maniac.

"Its so warm!!" Shuya exclaimed. Jake shakes his head. Frank smiles and tosses a blanket around her shoulders. "It is, isn't it?"

"It is! Oh yeah! Hi my names shuya! Whats your names?" Shuya asked the other members of the legion as she practically turned into a blanket burrito. Joey ignores her but Susie and Julie introduce themselves. Frank then introduces Joey.

"Hi Susie! Hi Julie! Is Joey mute? I have a friend who is mute, he's cool! And purple. And he has antlers. And he liked fish. He was great." Shuya rambled.

Frank shrugs. "He doesn't talk a lot."

"Okay!" Shuya said smiling. She was sitting yet she was always moving. She was just full of energy, it was like she ate an entire bag of candy in 2 seconds.

Joey hits that blunt. "Hey, you guys know that rings are just short straws?"

"Whats a straw?" Shuya asked joey, she was extremely confused on what the hell a straw was. Joey hits it again. "An elongated ring."

"Oooh! Like this but longer?" Shuya asked as she took this silver ring decorated with various glistening gems and pointed at it.

Joey nods. "Ye."

"Who would want such a long ring? You can't close your hand then." Shuya asked as she put the ring back on her hand.

"You drink through it." Frank chuckles.

"Why? Can't you just drink straight from the cup?" Frank shrugs. "I...don't know."

"Well its dumb. Just drink from the cup. Whatever if you get a couple splinters from the damn thing, its made of wood and you should be careful with it." Shuya said putting the blanket over her head.

Frank shrugs again. "People are weird."

"More like humans are weird... oh yeah, I'm hungry, is there something I can eat?" Shuya asked frank, "I haven't eaten in 3 days."

Frank shrugs. "You...don't really need to eat here."

Shuya gasped.

"What do you mean you don't have to eat???" Shuya asked extremely panicked, "thats the best part of the day! There's so many good foods! Elk! Bear! People! They all are so good! I refuse to believe that eating isn't necessary!"

Frank laughs. "People? Oh my, are you in luck. You can eat people here if you want to. We eat for taste, not because it gives us anything."

Shuyas face lit up immediately.

"Really???" Shuya asked happier than before, "YAY! Where are these people I can eat?"

Frank laughs.

"Oi, Spider god. You mind bringing us one?" The entity's tendrils pull a wriggling, fighting Dwight up through the ground and deposit him at their feet. "Here you are. An appetizer." He smirks. Shuya started to jump up and down in glee. She jumped onto dwight and started to eat the poor man like a rabid dog except with opposable thumbs.

Dwight's wails of agony make Joey come out of the lodge to watch. He tries to fight back, but his throat is soon torn out and he can't yell any longer, his cries turning to gurgles and then to silence. Shuya continued to devour the poor dudes body before she was satisfied. She ate a shit ton of the dude.

"He was delicious!" Shuya exclaimed as she jumped up and down in absolute excitement. Dwight's mangled body slowly begins to disintegrate after he dies. His arms and thighs were chewed down to the bone, and the skin of his face was torn apart, parts of his skull showing. His stomach had been totally torn apart, and his guts spread around him. The mess vanished completely.

Frank pats Shuya's back with a bright smile. "Nice." He couldn't help but feel a bit turned on by that sight. Damn. She'd absolutely decimated Dwight. He kind of wanted that. Shuya smiled wide.

"Thank you! But isn't anything like the time I killed a person, ate most of their body in front of one their friends, and framed the other friend for the murder." Shuya said looking at frank.

Frank smirks. "That's kind of hot. I've killed a lot of people too." He says it proudly, smiling softly.

"... no it wasn't hot, it was lukewarm at best that day." Shuya said bluntly.

Frank laughs. "That's...not what I meant." He goes back inside to sit down. Shuya followed frank back inside and sat next to the blanket. She didnt want to get the blanket bloody so she hoped the blankets warmth would just go over to her. The blood on her slowly disintegrates, and leaves her clean. Frank goes off somewhere to do something. Shuya looked at the flames for a bit.

"Hey... where did frank go?" Shuya asked. Joey snickers.

"Probably to jack off. He likes watching people get killed."

"What... what is that?" Shuya asked as she cocked her head to the side, "I have no idea what that is."

He takes his hand and makes the motion above his groin just once. "You know-?"

"Uh... What?" Shuya was even more confused now, "that didn't help me understand that at all."

He honestly doesn't know how else to explain it. "Male masturbation."

"Whats that????" Shuya asked even more confused, "im so confused..."

Joey gives up.

"Sorry, it's hard to explain."

"Im so confused... why are humans so weird..." shuya groaned.

"You right. But I dunno why. It's kind of irritating." Joey offers her his blunt. "Wanna try? No pressure." "What is it?" Shuya asked looking at the blunt of the good kush.

Joey explains."Drugs. Not addictive, just makes you feel all floaty and calm. Helps clear the head. You don't have to smoke if you don't want to."

"Whats a drug?" Shuya asked, holy shit was she oblivious to the world and its things. Joey sighs, and can't help thinking 'oh fuck, here we go again'

"It's a substance that causes pleasure when taken. There are worse drugs. This is called Marijuana. Or Weed. Or skunk. It's got lotsa names." He takes another hit, and blows it out his nose.

"No thank you but why do you use it?" Shuya asked.

Joey shrugs. "Keeps me calm. I've got a bad temper, and I anger easily. I'm just a better person when I do."

"Well if it makes you a better person and you aren't hurting anyone out of anger than you do you joey!" Shuya gave Joey a thumbs up and a smile. Joey smiles at her and gives her a thumbs up. Shuya went back to just being warm in blankets, Waiting for something exciting to happen.

Shuya got annoyed by the long time without things happening so she went off to go find frank. Perhaps he was done with what the fuck he was doing.

Frank wasn't done with his work, and when she opens the door he just looks up at her. "You kidding me? Can you knock?" He has his dick out, and had stopped mid-fap. Shuya cocked her head to the side.

"Okay," shuya said before she knocked on the door, "im bored. Wanna go do things?"

"lemme finish first." He nods at her. "Then we can go kill some survivors."

"Okay!" Shuya said before she closed the door and went back to the bonfire.

"That was weird. You humans are so weird." Shuya said as she sat down.

Joey can't help but crack up. Frank comes downstairs after a few more minutes, sighing softly. "Alright, let's go kill some bitches."

Shuya jumped up from the ground and cheered

"Yay! Let's go!" Shuya exclaimed before she ran out the building. Frank grins and runs after her, knife in hand. Shuya stopped.

"Wait... i have no idea where I'm going..." shuya whispered to herself.

Frank takes shuyas hand and leads her along.

"This way. We're gonna fight someone I hate." The other 3 members of the legion run up behind them, all laughing and chatting behind him.

"What did they do?" Shuya asked, "why do you hate them?" Shuya wanted to make sure that she wasn't gonna eat someone she was gonna regret eating.

"They're pricks. The dude broke my nose with a brick. And the girl beat me within an inch of my life." He snickers. "They're gonna come back to life, so don't worry about butchering them. That's part of the fun~" he hums and walks with her towards the shack. Shuya decided to go on ahead. She started to run but she tripped on a rock and fell into the fire. Shuya started to scream as she scrambled out of the fire, her clothes turning to char and her scales and flesh burning. Frank frowns.

"Hmm. That's gonna leave a mark." Philip runs away, afraid because he was literally made of wood. Frank reaches into the fire, grabbing her arm and trying to pull her out, but her flesh comes off in his hand, leaving the bones of her forearm bear.

"Oh." He drops the handful of charred flesh and sighs softly. "Well, she'll come back. I'll just end her suffering." He stabs her right in the forehead, breaking through her skull with brutal strength and twisting the knife, killing her almost immediately. Seconds later shuya showed back up in the campfire. She looked kinda dazed yet overall okay.

"Why'd you stab me??" Shuya yelled before she kicked frank lightly in the leg, "don't yall have a healer around here??" Shuya was getting more and more angry. Frank sighs.

"You were cooking. And I thought it would be best to end your pain." He frowns. "We don't have a healer, no. We just reincarnate."

Shuya lightly kicked frank again.

"Im gonna go do some recon, ill be back in a bit." Shuya said still pretty ticked. Shuya left to go to the area they were going to.

Frank nods, and fucks around with his gang. Shuya found the shack and knocked on the door.

"Hello?" Shuya asked. Annabell heard the knock.

"Someone new? I don't recognize that voice." Annabell muttered.

Jake looks to the door and shyly peeks his head out of it. "Hello?" Jake came face to face with shuya.

"Hello! I'm new around here and I was just meeting the other people here!" Shuya said with a smile. Annabell kept her eyes on jake to make sure he was gonna be okay. Jake gasps.

"Woah! I've never seen anyone quite like you before!" He seems mystified. "Your scales are rather pretty." He smiles brightly. "Welcome! I'm Jake...this is Annabell. And this is our home!"

"Thank you!" Shuya thanked jake before she took a look inside to see annabell on the bed, "wait a minute... i know you. You're the slave master killer in Vendar?" Shuya asked annabell. Annabell narrowed her eye.

"Yeah, what about it?" Annabell asked.

"Nothing! I was just wondering if I knew the right person!" Shuya said with a smile, " oh yeah, im shuya!" Annabell didnt trust this lizardfolk.

"Perhaps you should leave... we were in the middle of something important." Annabell said hoping that jake would get the whole 'dude i don't trust her'. Jake senses it and sighs softly.

"Ah...sorry....." He walks back to Annabell's side, hugging the doll he had in his arms.

"Its alright!" Shuya said before she went back to the campfire, "So uh... i don't think we should beat them up." Shuya told the legion. Frank frowns.

"And why not?" He had put his mask on, and was tossing his knife into a stump at his feet, then retrieving it, and doing it again.

"2 reasons," shuya said raising a hand with two fingers up, "1. They were cuddling and that just disrespectful to kill them, 2. The woman in there is a serial killer from where I'm from and she is pretty serious, she like... who's a really big serial killer known for stealing peoples body parts and turning them into jewelry and is somewhat cannibalistic?" Frank shrugs.

"I mean, where we're from, we four are a group of serial killers." He says it proudly. "We'd killed a decent amount of people before we got here, and the body count just keeps getting higher, trial after trial." He scoffs. "Besides, we reincarnate. Why should we care if she hurts us?"

"She's known for holding a grudge... she killed the person who got her into the slave system almost a decade after escaping slavery..." shuya said.

"pretty sure she already hates me. If you don't wanna do it, then we will." A half hearted "yeah!" Comes out of Susie.

"So what if she hates you? You can just ignore her and her boyfriend. You don't have to even associate with them if you don't want to." Shuya said trying to difuse the situation.

"no, that's not possible. If he gets matched with me in a trial, I have to kill him." He sighs. "the situation's gonna happen either way. Besides. I hate em."

"I'm sure she understands the whole situation of being forced to kill people that you would rather not," shuya said, "i could talk to her if you would like." Frank growls lowly.

"I enjoy it very much, thank you."

"... frank. I will tell the entire group what I saw if you fucking go over there and hurt them. Apperantly that's disgusting to humans so yeah." Shuya threatened. Frank shrugs.

"Bold of you to assume they havent seen me doing that before."

"Bold of you to assume that I still have an idea what you were doing and why." Shuya said to try to change the subject.

"I was pleasuring myself." He humms, not really giving a fuck because he knew he was a disgusting person.

"WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT MEAN?" Shuya yelled in pure confusion, "THE MONASTERY DIDNT PREPARE ME FOR THIS!"

Frank laughs. "Yeah, if you were at a monastery you wouldn't know. Do you even know what sex is?"

"WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT??" Shuya yelled even more confused.

Frank can't help cackling as he gives her a crude rundown of sex ed. If Sally could make a face, she'd be looking incredibly disgusted right about now.

Shuya was still not understanding.

"I still don't understand!" Shuya yelled, "that sounds fake and if it was real it sounds painful and dumb!"

"Want me to show ya-?" Frank laughs, but Joey grabs the back of his hoodie and pulls him back. he'd been leaning closer to Shuya.

"No! It sound painful and I bet it makes you shit out eggs!" Shuya yelled.

"it's not painful if ya do it right!" He laughs. "and you won't shit eggs-!"

"How do you know you virgin!" Shuya yelled.

"Bold of you to assume I haven't slayed coochie before!"

"BOLD OF YOU TO SAY THAT IN LEG EATTING DISTANCE!" Shuya yelled before she fucking dived and started to devour franks leg.

Frank moans. "Oh fuck yeah~"

Shuya stopped and moved a couple feet away.

"You know I thought you were kinda cute and nice but you're just another one of those people you find drunk at a tavern!" Shuya hissed, "i thought you were cool but you're really not!" Shuya then yelled what can be guessed is a slur in a different language. Frank frowns and sighs.

"Ok." He turns and leaves, limping away-heading back to the lodge. "Ugh..." He didn't show it, but that really hurt. Shuya had a 'holy shit that worked' moment. She felt accomplished yet... disappointed. She was sad that the first person she met in this realm ended up being a dick. Shuya walked away from the campfire, found an uninhabited area and claimed it for herself while Frank runs off to hide so he can cry. Shuya made a small shelter and she felt... really sad. Shuya shook her head and went back to her business. She made a small campfire. The teen killer bandages up his wound, sterilizing it so that he wouldn't get any kind of infection. The pain makes him wail, but he recovers rather quickly. Shuya sat next to her small fire, she felt bored and just... no, no no, he was a dick so she shouldn't go find him and apologize... she went and started to look for frank. Frank was sitting silently in the lodge, wiping the occasional tear from under his mask. Shuya knew she wasn't gonna be welcome in the lodge after what just happened but it was the only place she thought he would go. Shuya attempted to scale the side of the building with no windows nearby. Frank didn't care regardless and lays down on his mattress, facing the wall and trying to fall asleep. He didn't bother trying to remove his mask. Shuya got to the balcony and snuck through the place. She found frank and she started to regret even coming into vicinity of the building. She walked over and sat down quietly.

"Im sorry, frank." Shuya apologized to frank. He ignores her completely, pulling the blanket tighter to his body. "I didnt mean any of it... i was angry and... i take full responsibility for what happened... im... really sorry. What can I do to make it up to you?" Shuya felt extremely guilty for everything.

"Nothing, go away." His voice cracks halfway through the sentence, and trails off at the end like it was difficult got him to speak. "Im not leaving," shuya said, "youre hurting and I don't want you to." Shuya set a hand on franks shoulder gently. He flinches away at the touch.

"Just leave."

"... when you're ready, come find me... im not that far from the campfire..." shuya said before she left through the window and went back to her new place.

Frank continues his ugly crying fit until he's done, and then takes a nap while Shuya went under her little shelter and laid down. Soon enough, Frank goes to see Shuya. He's limping rather badly, and hides it badly. Shuya was sitting in front of her little fire. She looked up to see frank, obviously limping.

"Hey frank, welcome to my new home." Shuya said as she stood up. He flinches a little bit as she stands up, growling softly. "Urgh."

"How about we sit down," shuya suggested, "maybe that will make talking easier." Frank plops down across from her with a pained sigh. Shuya sat back down.

"I need to ask, you don't seem to care what people think of you yet... why did my words hurt you?" Shuya asked. Frank sighs.

"I don't know."

Shuya sighed.

"Im... really really sorry," Shuya apologized, "I didn't really mean any of it, I just wanted to make sure you didn't do something you would regret... but I ended up doing something I regret... could you ever forgive me?"

Frank shakes his head.

"It's fine." He sighs. "I'll live. And I don't regret." He frowns, slipping off his mask. He looked like he'd been crying, and his nose was running so he wipes it away on the back of his hand. Shuya crawled over, sat down next to him, and hugged him.

"I don't think you're okay." Shuya said as she raised a hand up to the side of franks face. Frank sighs. "Don't pity me." He flinches at the touch of her hand on his cheek. "Pity? I don't think I'm pitying you," shuya said as she lightly rubbed the side of franks face with her thumb, "i think im comforting you. There's a difference, like stalking someone and regularly breaking into their house."

Frank sighs. "You wouldn't comfort someone you didn't feel bad for." He can't admit it, but he did like her gentle touch.

"Would you rather be pityed and comforted or not pityed and alone?" Shuya asked. He frowns. "You...got me there..."

"Nobody wants to be alone," shuya said, "even the most serious of people need to have someone to talk to." Frank goes silent and lets himself relax. "I'm sorry for saying such nasty things to you...before."

"To be honest I don't even remember what we were yelling about. I only remember you being sad and me being mad. I don't remember alot of things." Shuya said. Frank nods.

"We both said some rather mean things."

"What did I say?" Shuya asked genuinely curious about what she said.

"you bit my leg, I moaned, and then you told me that I was 'just like the men at the tavern'. And then you cussed me out in another language." He sighs. "After you asked what you caught me doing... I tried to explain, but you're really dense..." He speaks rather angrily, not quite realizing how mean he sounded. "... I don't remember any of that, and you sound really mad," Shuya said as she put her hand down, "but I guess you're right about the dense part, my old leader joy would yell at me because I didn't understand my part of the plans sometimes." Frank calms his voice.

"Sorry. You didn't deserve that outburst." He sighs and looks away.

"its okay!" Shuya said, "sometimes you just gotta yell." Shuya smiled. Frank nods and just sighs.

"Ugh."

"What wrong?" Shuya asked, She was still pretty energetic. Frank shrugs.

"My leg hurts. And not in the good way."

"This is why we have healers! Oh wait... we don't have any healers here..." shuya said.

Frank nods, chuckling softly.

"Are we gonna have to cut your leg off?" Shuya asked.

Frank shakes his head. "You could kill me."

"... oh yeah!" Shuya exclaimed before she tackled frank and absolutely decimated the dude. Frank stays still, trying not to moan as she tears him to bits.

Shuya continued to eat frank, she didnt even notice any sound coming from frank. He soon dies, laying there underneath her.

Shuya didn't seem to notice that frank was dead until it turned to dust.

"Awww..." shuya groaned as she stood up.

Frank stumbles around to the campfire, dazed from having been killed. He rubs his head and groans.

Shuya turned around to see frank, dazed and stumbling. Shuya ran up and hugged him.

"Heyyy!" Shuya exclaimed. Frank hugs her back tightly, if only to catch his balance.

"Hugs!" Shuya exclaimed before she blepped. Frank bleps back, laughing softly. Shuya smiled wide before she lightly headbutt frank before he laughs and gives her a light noogie. Shuya giggled. She tapped frank before running off.

"Tag you're it!" Shuya exclaimed as she run off. Frank laughs and gives chase. Shuya hid in a pretty good spot so she didn't have to run the whole time. She watched frank look for her for a bit. Frank plops down on the ground after awhile of searching.

Shuya snuck behind frank and tackled him.

"Hey Frank!" Shuya exclaimed, "that was fun!"

Frank laughs and nods. "Yeah!"

"Do you think the other would wanna play???" Shuya asked very excitedly, her tail going absolutely insane.

Frank laughs.

"Maybe! We'll see!"

Shuya jumped up and down in excitement.

"Lets go let's go!" Shuya exclaimed as she started running to the lodge. Frank makes pace easily with her. Shuya and frank made it to the lodge and shuya went into the lodge. She was asking them extremely fast but it was too fast and excited to even attempt to decipher her. Frank regurgitates a similar message, and both Julie and Joey jump at the opportunity, while Susie resolves to count scores.

Shuya was so excited and happy, she was practically vibrating in excitement. They start up the game. Joey is it, and he moves with frightening speed as he rushes towards Shuya. Julie hops up a tree and Frank runs away.

"Oh shit!" Shuya yelled before she ran off in a random direction. Hopefully the years of running around the monastery would keep her from getting caught. Joey rushes after her, laughing softly and tossing his knife into a tree. He uses it as a foothold and hops up into it, tackling Julie out of it. They land in a pile of leaves and Susie ticks it off. Julie runs off to try and catch either Frank or Shuya, searching through the brush like a predator. Shuya started to hide. She listened for footsteps and overall human sounds. Frank jumps out at her from the shadows. "Shhhhhh." Somehow he'd approached her silently.

Shuya stayed quiet.

"Why did you jump at me???" Shuya signed out.

"dunno." He signs back, laying beside her on the brush.

"Im guessing you're not it?" Shuya signed before she peeked around the tree.

Frank shakes his head. "not the case, my dear."

"So... you're it?" Shuya signed as she backed away a bit.

"no, I'm not. Julie is."

"You signed the wrong thing you stinky rat." Shuya signed with a smile, it wasn't really sure if she was joking about the stinky rat thing. Shuya moved back to where she was behind the tree. Frank feels insulted but doesn't betray it. "Rude." He says out loud. "Jules, she's over here!"

Shuya started to run in a random direction because holy shit she wasn't gonna lose. Frank gets tackled from behind by Julie. "Oof-"

Shuya ran past the campfire and stopped for a second.

"Hey...! Sorry about earlier...! Bye!" Shuya said out of breath before going back to running. Frank chases her, a stick in his hand. He seems frenzied, and bops her lightly over the head as he chases her.

"Hey! Don't hit me with a stick!" Shuya yelled at frank.

Frank smacks her again as he gets closer, then tosses it to the side and tackles her. They spin midair and it's Frank that hits the ground first.

"Owie..!" Shuya groaned, "oh no! Frank are you okay?"

Frank nods.

"Mhm. But you lost." He laughs softly.

"Technically I win because I was the last to get caught!" Shuya exclaimed with a smile. Frank frowns.

"You're right...fuck." he lets her go and just lays there. "shit."

"Yay! I win!" Shuya exclaimed but she noticed frank looking bummed out, "hey... whats wrong?" Shuya poked frank.

Frank shrugs. "Nothing. I'm a sore loser. Nice job."

"Well you got second! Thats still good!" Shuya said with a smile.

Frank shrugs. "Yeah, I guess."

Shuya smiled, stood up, and held her hand out.

"Wanna go back to the others?" Shuya asked with a friendly smile. Frank takes it and nods, standing up to follow her. Shuya kept holding franks hand when they got back to the others. Frank doesn't willingly let go of hers and whispers something that's barely auditable.

"Step on me."

"Huh?" Shuya was extremely confused, she barely heard him and wasn't sure if she heard him right, "what did you say?"

Frank hums. "Stop holding." He drops her hand.

"Oh sorry!" Shuya said as she stopped holding his hand. Frank smiles.

"It's ok." He goes back to the group and immediately gets locked into a noogie by Julie. Shuya skipped on over with a wide smile.

"That was alot of fun!" Shuya exclaimed.

Joey laughs. "yeah. It was." Frank tries to fend off Julie to no avail.

"I haven't ran that much since I angered joys dire wolf!" Shuya chuckled, "fenrir was always feisty!"

All four teens look confused by this. "Like...the Norse wolf titan, Fenrir?" Susie speaks up.

"Huh? No fenrir was big but he wasn't THAT big. He's only as tall as joey." Shuya said not understanding what's going on. Joey oohs. "Damn. That's a bigass dog."

"Yeah but fenrir wasn't the tallest in the group, not by a long shot. Our healer, galas is 8 feet tall. No joke, we measured." Shuya said with a smile. Frank oohs and climbs on Joey's back, making them both about as tall as Galas may have been. "Like this?"

"Yeah! Now the opposite of galas was our other healer, rabies. She was about... 3 feet tall? Something like that." Shuya was excited to talk about her friends. Frank settles down on Joey's back and hums softly.

"That's cool! Very short."

"Yeah, she had some fixation on 'flirting with people? She actually spent a night with the captain of the city guard in a city we were staying in. No idea what they were doing but she got info from him." Shuya said with a smile.

Frank snorts at that. "oH?!"

"Yeah she joined the group at the same time as a tabaxi named mikaela. She stole an entire stores products in the night once with the help of our leader joy. She got alot of money out of it though." Shuya said. After a while shuya ran out of people to talk about. The teens nod along with this story, Frank smiling at her the whole time.

"And that's the story of how Joy killed king Matias!" Shuya exclaimed, "anyways I think that's all the storys of my group of friends! Other than the stuff I promised joy to not talk about." Frank laughs softly and hops off Joey's shoulders to walk over and take Shuya's hand again. Shuya smiled and held onto franks hand.

"Im getting cold. I don't like being cold. I really don't like being cold. I wanna go back to a place with warmth." Shuya rambled about being cold. Frank takes his coat off and puts it around her shoulders. It was rather warm inside.

"Here, I'll take you back to the lodge."

"Ooo this is really warm. I like it! Actually I love it! Very warm. Alright, lodge time." Shuya said as she stood up, "time for warmth. Warm warm. Warmth time." Frank holds her gently to him as he walks, trying to keep in her warmth. Shuya was happy and getting warm. When they got back to the lodge shuya plopped down right in front of the bonfire. Frank sits beside her, smiling like a giddy child. Shuya curled into a scaly ball on the floor just enjoying franks jacket and the fires warmth. Frank lays down behind her to cuddle her. Shuyas tail finally stopped moving and she was now really calm. Frank holds her close to him, sighing contentedly. Shuya flipped herself to face frank and hugged him for more warmth. Shuya ended up resting her head on franks chest. Frank gently pats her head, holding her close.

Shuya smiled as she got head pats. She started to make some clicking noises, it was the lizard equivalent to purring. Frank smiles at this and holds her still closer, petting her head with one hand and holding her close by her waist with the other. Shuya looked up at frank and blepped again. Frank cuddles her gently, keeping her warm. Shuya lightly headbutt frank. Shuya slipped out of franks grasp and started running.

"Im not giving this back by the way!" Shuya yelled before she ran out the building laughing. Frank groans and just lays there. He'd loved having her in his arms, but...now she was gone, and he was cold. He curls up on the floor. He'd have to steal back his jacket sometime. Shuya stopped when she realized frank wasn't gonna chase her. Shuya frowned.

"I left warm area for nothing? Aww..." shuya groaned. Frank sits up and warms his hands at the fire, shivering a bit.

"Urgh...so fucking cold here-" Shuya walked back to find a very cold frank. She sneaked over to frank and hugged him from behind. He blushes, and then smiles at this.

"Heh~ thanks." He was shivering.

"Ill be right back." Shuya said as she ran over to franks bed, took the blanket, ran back, and wrapped the blanket around frank and herself. He pulls her into his lap, tucking his face into the nape of her neck. Shuya smiled as she wrapped the blanket like a loose burrito. She loved physical affection but she didnt really understand vocal affection. He holds her tightly, so incredibly touch starved that he longed for her touch. Shuya giggled as frank tightened his grip around her. Shuya didnt fully understand why frank was holding her so closely but she really liked the attention. Frank just hugs her, trying his best to keep himself from being horny to her and basically just cuddles her. He felt...strange around her. And not in a gross way. He felt warm, and fuzzy. She was like chicken soup for his soul. Shuya started to lizard purr/click again. Shuya was so happy in franks arms. Shuya poked franks nose.

"Boop!" Shuya said with a wide smile. He laughs softly, and pets her head, in awe at the feel of her scales under his fingertips. Shuya looked up at frank again.

"Hey frank? Have you ever met a lizardfolk other than me before?" Shuya asked. Frank tells her he hasn't, and leans his head against her neck.

"Really? I don't think my race is rare... did you live in a really cold place?" Shuya asked.

"Where I'm from, everyone's a human."

"Really??? That's so weird! Wait... if everyone's a human where are are from... why didn't you freak out when you saw me?" Shuya asked.

"I don't care. I thought you might've realized that by now-" he chuckles softly.

"I thought you mightve realized I'm not smart." Shuya said bluntly.

Frank shrugs. "Smarter than me, I'd say. Just a little slow with retaining information."

"... joy says I'm an idiot. But I'm fine with that." Shuya said.

"you're not an idiot." He insists. Shuya stared at him for a bit.

"... why do you think that?" Shuya asked.

"everyone has issues with some things. I just think you need a little more time than other people. That doesn't make you an idiot."

"Thats a good wisdom," Shuya said, "thank you for the wisdom." Frank kisses the back of her neck. "You're welcome. I mean it. I don't think you're an idiot."

"What did you just do?" Shuya asked.

"I kissed you." He smiles softly. "Sorry...was that too much?"

"Being kissed is weird... do it again." Shuya said looking up at frank. He does it again.

"Usually, if you kiss someone, you'd do it on the lips, but I think this way is rather nice, too."

"Why on the lips?" Shuya asked, "that sounds like it would just spread mouth germs."

"it's a thing people do when they like each other. It's an affectionate thing. I'm trying to show you that I like you." He blushes. "Maybe...I love you?"

"Why?" Shuya asked, "is spreading mouth germs affectionate?"

"no...it's..." He sighs softly and just ignores her question, he just didn't have a good answer, kissing her neck again. "Mmn."

"What does it mean when you get kissed on the neck?" Shuya asked.

"Erm...usually it's strong affection, also a bit because that's all I can reach of you." He smiles nervously, holding her gently in his lap. Shuya moved so she was facing frank and she was still on his lap.

"Does this make it easier for you?" Shuya asked. He blushes brightly.

"Ah...I mean...do you like being kissed like that?" He was getting flustered. This was bad. He didn't want to drive her away.

"I've never really been kissed before so this is all new for me." Shuya shrugged.

Frank sighs softly.

"But is it alright? Do you mind it or is it bad?"

"Being kissed on the neck? It was weird but its alright." Shuya said. Frank blushes.

[prorevenge]

After months of putting up with my roommate from hell, I got the revenge of lifetime and screwed her over out of a fuckton of money and got her to pay rent and life has never been sweeter! (This is a long one)

This is a long one but very much worth the ride, so buckle up. (also, English isn't my native lang, sorry if there are any mistakes)

This story takes place a couple of years back. During college, I lived with several roommates, all of them were nice and we got along well, except for this one bitch, let's call her Karen. if Satan and Hitler had a child and that child had a child with Stalin and Cruella de Vil, that would be Karen for you, she is a loud-mouthed stupid, egocentric bitch who has the face that scare the shit out of a toilet. She would never clean up after herself, she would always leave her plates and things at the spot where she last used them. I have lost counts of how many times, I caught her stealing my clothes without asking and if you so much as touch her clothes she loses her shit on you, or her drinking our lactose-intolerant roommates almond milk and any time we confronted her for drinking it, she would shrug and say "I only had a sip, stop being so stingy." She plays her music loud at night, invites stranger without giving any heads up, a time or two she didnt pay rent even though her parents are FILTHY RICH and she is wearing gucci and prada shit, Karen also fucking lies about everything, even things that are not worth lying about. like if she woke up 7, and you ask her, she'll lie through her fucking teeth and say she rose with the sun rise because she is a natural. (ps, this is something i actually heard her say to her parents while she was skypeing them....so cringy, who the fuck says that? but i digress)

Months we have fucking put up with her, of course we tried to get other roommates but unfortunately when we all moved in everything, all documents and contracts were done in her name so kicking her out would require a lot of effort and most of us were busy with school and work and life happens. So we ignore it as much as we can and try to move on.

We are now all seniors and in our final semesters, meaning graduation was coming, AND Karen is planning a backpack trip across Europe with her friends as a graduation gift to herself, this is important so remember this.

One of our roommates and my closest friend, Sasha, has had a crush on a guy that lives down the hall. Any time the two of them are together, Sasha and the Guy keep giving each other googly eyes and blushing faces; it was sooo cute. Sasha is a verbal autistic person and has never dated anyone because she has a hard time with socializing and understanding social ques and subtlety, which lets face it, that is the core of dating, especially flirting but with a lot of encouragement from me and the final roommate, Lola we got her to ask him out. He said yes. She was so happy, you guys, she flew back into the apartment and did an hour of happy dance with her arms flailing about and a shit eatin grin on her face; needless to say we were all so happy. Karen caught wind of this and it just so happens at that time she was having relationship problems, I guess her bf finally realized he's dating human garbage. Not one to be outshined, Karen behind all of our backs went to the guy's place and spun lies about Sasha, saying she is a serial cheater and even made a fake account for Sasha's so called bf. the guy never called Sasha, and eventually weeks passed by he told us why but by then Sasha felt like the damage was done and lost interest in him.

I. WAS. FUCKING. FURIOUS.

This, this level of dickery and bloody pettiness is the straw that finally broke the camel's back and I vowed I wouldn't fucking leave until I served my slice of justice. Here's another character that you must know about, Prof C. His wife two years ago was in a horrible car accident and as a result is in a wheelchair, this is especially problematic because she was a stay home mom that took care of their two special needs kids and they have a toddler at home. Home life is a mess for him, he is running ragged between working and single-handedly is taking care of his family, the uni took pity and also feared the workload would see one of their best and most beloved teachers leave the school struck a deal with him to help him out. In all of his classes there will be quizzes and midterms, this doesnt change, but assignments you submit and he corrects at the end of the year, this is important cuz our uni has zero tolerance on proffs that dont constantly update the students course works so that students have the chance to improve their grades.

Karen, the lazy and stupid bitch she is, is somehow skating through his assignments, even though they require a shit tone of research and writing. I accidentally learned that one of her older friends told her that she only needs submit the paper on its due date and to only write the first 3 pages and use a paraphrase tool for the rest of the paper so the plagiarism software wont detect it and would think its original material and when the end of the year comes, submit a hard copy but with the first pages being her actual work and the rest being completely plagiarized, professional work. Prof C won't know cuz the likelihood a man as busy as him thoroughly checking the work of 120+ students is pretty low. I grinned. A plan was beginning to formulate in my head. Oh, sweet mother of Jesus, she is going down! All semester long I let her do this for all of the 7 papers, one of them which is a term paper that has 20% on it alone, all the while I spied and gathered all of her pass codes, social media, her student ID, everything.

The end of the year came and I compiled all of her assignments, both the original one with the paraphrasing tools she used to circumvent plagiarism and the one she finally handed them in, and I even made photos were there are side-to-side comparison of the assignments. This is a good start but not enough. So, One day chillin at the living room I open a conversation about relationships, Karen is two timing her new boyfriend and is sleeping with some other Person. so, I ask her questions like "don't you feel guilty for cheating?" and "You do realize this is wrong?" and I even paraphrase my words in a way that is vague but also clear, for example I would say "It's not fair, so many people work so hard everyday to be successful and you are here cheating and lying your way to success." Karen, narcissistic as fuck, would respond with snippets of I dont care and how she isnt cheating, she is only having fun and that everyone does it so why not her too. This is too good to be true, even her answers are vague, its like god put his hand on my shoulder, looked me right in the eyes and said, "burry this bitch". and Id be damned if I didnt. As you probably have guessed it by now, I was recording EVERYTHING. The recording plus the photos, and her assignments were more than enough evidence, I sent an anonymous email to the Professor, and i tell the girls so that they can prep for the shit storm thats coming. Three weeks later, results are out. she failed and LOST HER SHIT. She was screamin, crying, wailing, what a sight to see! you best believe, the girls and I were laughing. She tried to talk to the prof, but he was not having it. she cried and begged for a second chance but he said a hard no. So now she has two options: she goes ahead and doesn't graduate with us, and takes on a whole 'nother semester for one measly course or take summer course and cancel her trip to Europe, which mind you she spent a fuckton on, something like 13, 000$ and I know it could have been much cheaper but Princess Karen only wanted the best so yh. The next couple of weeks she spent sleepless nights because she was calling and cancelling all the reservations she made, tryin to get her money back BUT (again, GOD really was out for blood that day) because the cancellation was so close to some her trip most places refused to refund, or some charged her cancellation fees. She only managed to scrap 5.5 K back together, lossin 7.5 K. OUCH!

Its not over, having damning evidence I, with earned gusto, told her she was going to pay all of the bills till we move out, which was in two months, payback for all the times she was late on payment or defaulted and she would from now do her part of the house chores or else Im gonna send it all to the admin and faculty dean and she will fo sho be kicked out and all those uni years will have been for nothing. She hated it, she fucking threw tantrums and cussed me out but my god if she didnt do whats told. she cleaned her stuff, apologized to Sasha for what she did, I forced her to come clean to her BF (dont know the guy but the few times i met him he was super sweet to us and i felt bad for the guy), I watched her actually do the dishes for the first time in like years. IT was fucking amazing and I don't regret it one bit. In fact, anytime I feel sad now as an adult, i kick back my feet and reminiscine and a slow shit eatin grin draws itself upon my face.

tl;dr roommate was super mean, i found out she was cheating on her assignments and so i snitched on her and as a result she had to stay the summer and retake the class again or else she wouldn't graduate.

(source) story by (/u/let-the-write-one-in)

[mirohed]

park seonghwa | the trouble with twenty

pairing: park seonghwa + fem!reader (theres ONE mention of the reader being female im kinda mad i thought this was gender neutral the whole time)

wc: 3.0k

genre: fluff and angst (but the fluff wins)

warning: mentions of death

concept: when you fall in love with someone that isn’t your soulmate, you give a piece of your soul to them; failure to find your soulmate before running out of soul to give results in one’s death + you stop physically aging when you hit the age of twenty.

a/n: ok holy shit i ,, never finish my wips 99% of the time so im glad this could b the 1% !! s/o to @akokj @cheelix @lvryeol @trulyjaehyuk & finally a big big thank you to one of my irls who’s been w it since its beginnings in early january SDHJS

The universe, you find, seems to work in mysterious ways; you meet your first boyfriend in high school. The both of you are wide-eyed teenagers with no sense of how love works, but it's fine as long as you're together. It's Jongho that sits across from you at the diner and sips from your shared milkshake. It's Jongho that takes you to drive-in theaters and plants a nervous kiss to your lips on the ride home.

It's a sweet love that blooms in the summer, a whirlwind sweeping you higher and higher, and you relish the view. Being with him comes with this sweet, bubbling feeling ("Like soda?" he had joked one afternoon) that begins in the pit of your stomach, spreading outward until you sport matching carefree grins and aching cheeks.

The year is 1939, and you're on the cusp of your nineteenth birthday when all that has gone up begins to come crashing down.

You're about to fall asleep one night when you sit up, a sharp pain shooting through your whole body. You know what this feeling is; you've had to help Jongho through it when he went through the same thing.

Everyone says losing a part of one's soul is both a tragedy and an expected outcome. You've always maintained the opinion that the universe enacts its own cruel, unusual punishment on those who love anyone besides their fated partner. Those you love more than life itself are the ones who end up killing you.

Loving Jongho burns. It sears your whole body with an inhuman heat, and your mouth opens in a silent, pained scream.

And just as quickly as it had come, the pain vanishes, leaving a faint heat under your skin.

You turn nineteen. You still live in the same town you were born in. You reexamine your life.

Growing old isn't for you; too much to do, too much to see. You're meant for things greater than wasting away as his housewife and nursing his children.

A few nights later, you disappear with nothing but a few bags, whatever fuel remains in your car, and the road ahead to keep you company.

You wish you could say you lose track of time from there, but you don't. Time passes, and the world patches itself from years of war and anger. You return to what could be considered the new normal a little hardened from harrowing times, but otherwise no worse for wear.

You spend time with others — enough to break a few hearts. The feeling of new life, pieces of other people’s souls, being breathed into skin that grows older is a high unlike any other. You push down any thoughts of love, running from town to town the second things feel too real for you. Your body stops aging, and it’s a little jarring at first, but you grow used to seeing a twenty-year-old you in the mirror, even as you age far past it.

Your friends and family are still alive and well. You write to them sometimes, letters with no return address. You know your family wants you back, wants you to find the one your soul aches for, wants you tied down. You tried to understand it, you really did, but all it got you were sympathetic looks and a divide that wedges itself deeper and deeper and deeper.

At some point you realize that the letters you wrote, once full of emotion, have become monotonous, mere updates with no real commentary. You stop writing them.

The transition from summer's vivid green to autumn's dusty orange marks your arrival in a new town. You're idly swirling a drink in your hands when you lock eyes with a leather-clad young man from across the bar.

It's 1953 when you meet Mingi. He's exhilaration, speeding down empty land on a motorcycle he keeps pristine. He's everything your parents might have frowned at, bruised and bloody knuckles that have seen one too many bar fights. You come to find that he keeps a surprisingly soft heart locked behind it, one that opens easily to you.

The two of you are on a road trip when you feel that familiar rush, and you help him pull over. He grips your hands, bites into the blanket in the backseat, until it's over. He lets you take the wheel until you reach a rest stop.

You remember the night you gave the second piece of your soul away. It's a chilly autumn night — your anniversary. You hadn't listened to him when he had told you to dress for cold weather, and you were paying the price. Shivering, you run your hands up and down your arms in an attempt to warm up as you get off his motorcycle. It doesn't work, and Mingi notices, doing his best to hide a grin.

"What did I tell you?" he teases. You're about to open your mouth for a retort when he shrugs his jacket off (that same worn leather piece you saw a year ago) and helps you fit your arms in the sleeves. It's an action he's used to, but there's something about the atmosphere tonight that makes your breath hitch. You look up at him, and he grins before leaning in.

The kiss is slow, his mouth moving languidly against yours as the city sleeps below. He pulls away first, biting back a chuckle when your lips try to follow. “I love you,” he whispers as he pulls you into his embrace.

And again, the pain that makes your blood boil. Somewhere in the haze of pain, between bunching your hands in his shirt and loud curses into the night, you tell yourself this is the last time you give your soul to another.

You feel a subtle pain in your chest as you head to the next town, leaving Mingi and the memories in the rearview mirror.

Time passes, and you see enough winters to make you sick of snow. You become the longest-lived person in known history, and it makes you famous.

You're contacted to speak about your accounts from major historical events (none of which are particularly useful), and find yourself in movies and documentaries, on talk shows, and more than once as a speaker for a new museum. There was a point where you could turn a corner and someone would recognize you as the only living "immortal."

It's one of those corners turned, on one of those countless winters, that you run into a young man. You don’t miss the way he swallows lightly before clearing his throat to apologize.

You've long since lost track of time when you meet Hongjoong. (But if you had to give an estimate, you'd put it around the 21st century.) You don't think it matters when he takes you for coffee, pulling you into a cozy corner cafe. He draws you in, little by little, and you pretend to not notice.

Where he is open, you are closed — on your fifth date, he tells you that he doesn't think he'll find his soulmate anytime soon.

("The world is too big," he says, bumping shoulders as you walk side by side. "I'm too old to keep going."

"How old?" you ask. He hums, takes a preparatory sip from his drink.

"Almost forty by now, I think."

You wonder if he's forgotten that you must be more than twice his age. Instead you say, "Really? You don't look a day over twenty." He grins at that, a beautiful thing that leads to a laugh you could never tire of hearing.)

You stay with him for much longer than you need to, long after he's given one of the last pieces of his soul to you. You wait for the "right time" to leave, but the right time never comes. Time passes. Seasons change. The two of you stay together for many winters before you finally come to your senses.

It happens one morning when you wake up shivering because he's hogged the blanket (again). As you try to reclaim it, you feel the familiar heat threaten to boil over.

You barely manage to get to the bathroom before the pain begins to crash over you in full force. After it's over, you remove your hand from your mouth, refusing to look at the tooth marks left behind.

There’s no more waiting for the right time, you think over the klaxon that blares in your head. It’s here and now.

Leaving Hongjoong is a terrifying thought, and somehow even harder to follow through with. His love isn't like Jongho's, sweet and awkward; it isn't like Mingi's, a fast-paced adrenaline rush; it's different. Softer. He reminds you of home — or at least, as home as a person can get for someone like you.

And unlike with Jongho and Mingi, the thought of staying with Hongjoong is very realistic. You've caught yourself picturing it more than once, and had to chastise yourself each time.

You pack your things for the millionth time, but as you glance back at your soon-to-be ex-boyfriend, you realize you can't just leave him without an explanation. The years you’ve spent together mean more to you than that.

Hongjoong wakes up hours later to a tear-stained letter. (By the time he finishes it, the ink is smudged and barely legible. His tears have mixed with yours in a sort of last kiss between them, and the thought causes him to sob once more.)

Joong,

If you’re reading this, I guess I must have already left. I wish things could be different I know you, and I already know that you’re gonna take this personally and blame yourself for not being enough. You are enough. You’re more than enough. I think I’m just selfish

Anyway I just want to thank you for...everything. The past few years have been better than I can express, and I think that’s what scares me. You’re the You’ll find your soulmate soon, whether they’re your meant to be or not. I’m sorry it couldn’t be me.

I love you.

Goodbye.

You definitely keep your guard up after that. Through every date you go on and every significant other you burn through, your walls stay up.

You've grown nostalgic over the past decade. Using the wildly advanced technology of who-knows-when, you track down a list of death sites.

You visit your family first. Your heart breaks a bit seeing the empty space in the shared family headstone. This was where you were supposed to be laid to rest. You turn away from the dilapidated cemetery, pulling up the coordinates to your next destination.

You find yourself staring at the fountain in the middle of a shopping mall. According to your holotech, this is where Jongho is buried. Your lips form a disapproving line as you close your eyes and try not to think about how he would have loved this place. You try not to think about him taking you here and nudging you in the direction of the arcade or food court as you rush out the doors.

They've gone and built a neighborhood over the cemetery where you would have found Mingi. From the looks of it, it looks like its residents are particularly affluent, and you can hear him snort in your ear. Even after years apart, you swear you can still smell the strong scent of cigarettes that followed him like a lost puppy. He would have hated his fate, and you offer a morbid chuckle in his memory.

You're crouched beside Hongjoong's tombstone, running a thumb over the warm stone. The birds chirp amongst themselves in a nearby tree, and you're thankful for the distraction. He wasn't buried with another person; you hope he managed to find someone regardless. You read the inscription — To you, forever and always — and swallow the lump of guilt that’s lodged itself in your throat.

It's on a calm spring morning that your holo rings. The centennial edition of a documentary you were in is currently being filmed, and the staff is requesting you interview with them again. You were going to accept anyway, but the producer piques your interest when she mentions another similarly...long-lived person. The trepidation in her voice is obvious, but you ignore it. Instead, you ask for the name of this immortal and to be interviewed with them. ("I thought I was the only one around," you had laughed into the phone. "It'd be good to make a new friend." The producer gave a pitying hum before agreeing.)

You try to search for any evidence of this new immortal, but come up with virtually nothing. You're more than a little disappointed that this person isn't milking their age for all it's worth, but you suppose they’re just more private than you are; after all, their existence is a relatively recent discovery.

When you first meet Seonghwa, you find it difficult to breathe. He's handsome, with a tall frame and a cute smile that would have caught your eye regardless.

Seeing him also hits you with a feeling you've dreaded for hundreds of years that makes your chest tighten. (In hindsight, you should have known exactly who he had to be, considering his similarly long life.) When you make eye contact, you can tell he feels the same immediate attraction. He has the audacity to smile.

"Finally," he murmurs. It's reverent, as if he's finally fulfilled his life's purpose. Your clench your jaw, ball your hands into fists so tight your knuckles go white, and narrow your eyes. Your heart's going a mile a minute, and you're choosing to interpret it as anger.

You've spent centuries building your fame on a foundation of nothing but broken hearts and your own ambition, and for what?

You're not sure how old you are when you find yourself on the downswing. You know that your body will start to physically age, and in about sixty years, you will have met the same fate as everyone you've left behind. The thought leaves a bitter taste in your mouth, but you swallow it, at least for the time being.

The interview goes off without a hitch, and you make to leave after thanking the staff when —

"Wait!" Biting back a curse, you continue moving (and make an effort to go faster). Unfortunately, Seonghwa's more than capable of keeping up with you.

"Look," he begins, running a hand through his hair, "I don't claim to know your relationship situation, but I'd at least like it if we were friends." He focuses on the polished toe of his shoe and gives an anxious chuckle that seems to be more for himself than you. "After all, we're soulmates. You might not believe in them, but I've imagined what it would be like to finally meet my soulmate since I was young."

You don't know how (you blame the universe), but you go out for lunch with him after that. Much of the meal is spent in silence (although you've got to take the blame for this one), and it's not until you're almost done that he strikes up a conversation.

"Were you hiding?" He twists the straw of his drink between two fingers before making eye contact.

"I don't hide. You've probably seen me around in some ad or another on the holo. Maybe even before that, when people still used computers and printed newspapers." He narrows his eyes a bit, trying to remember, but comes up with nothing. "I always thought it was you that hid. I've been all over the world, but this was the first time I've ever heard news of another immortal."

"I believe in fate. I've taken things as they came because I knew that in the end, it would be you and me. Turns out I was right."

You don't know how (you're still blaming the universe), but you exchange contact information. You go on more...friendly excursions with Seonghwa.

("Why not cut out the middleman and call them dates?" he asks, settling down on the couch next to you.

"They're not dates. We're not together, are we?" You turn the movie on, marking the end of the conversation.

When you fall asleep latched onto his arm, your head on his shoulder, he plants a soft kiss on your forehead. You wake up that morning wrapped in a blanket that wasn't there last night.)

You don't know how (actually, you do), but "friendly excursions" eventually turn into dates.

(The two of you sit at a park bench, listening to rustling leaves and the distant noise of cars passing.

"Is this a date?" you ask, taking a spoonful of his ice cream, your own sitting empty on your lap.

"They're not dates," Seonghwa parrots. "We're not together, are we?"

"Let's change that. Date me?"

"I thought you'd never ask.")

Dating Seonghwa is much like being wrapped in a warm blanket. He's caring and sweet and so thoughtful that it makes your head spin. You realize that somewhere along the way, you had lost the joy and wonder that came with life. Luckily for you, each date (whether it's a shared pizza in his apartment or a hike somewhere new) restores an optimism that you didn’t know you missed.

Decades pass, and the two of you are on your daily walk. Your bodies start to show their age, but when you look in the mirror, you still see youth alight in your eyes.

("When we first met, I thought that it was all downhill from there, but I was proven wrong."

"It's been a long time since I've heard you say you were wrong."

"And each time, I tell you to not get used to it.")

When the life slips away from you both, you promise to meet each other in the next life and every one that follows.

The universe, as mysteriously as it may work, hears this request and tucks it away, ready to see it through.

[gegenji]

(Metarutaru Koradrix) Out in Lakeland, it'd be a cloudy, but otherwise fine day... As fine a day in Lakeland can be anyway. Koratt would be smiling as he brought his direwolf, Gidgett, some Zonure meat from the nearby field, smiling brightly. "Here you go girl, bit of a snack after a hard day's work, yeah?"

(Chachanji Gegenji) Koratt would likely hear Chachan before he saw him, much like before - though under different context. The clop of hooves, the irate snorting of a temperamental stallion, and the quiet (hopefully calming) words being repeated by the aforementioned horse's rider - stammered out in a clumsy approximation of the fae tongue. Trying to both soothe the fiery beast and keep an eye out for his Dwarven friend at the same time was quite the task.

(Metarutaru Koradrix) He would hear the hoof and snorts, though not the quiet words as the horse sort of drowned out his words with its snorting. He smiles brightly upon seeing who was on the Horse... and honestly was amazed to even see a horse! They haven't been seen in Norvandt for who knows how long! Wide-eyed for a moment, he shook it off and pat Gidgett once she finished with her food, which she did in short order, before moving over to the Horse. "Chachanji!"

(Chachanji Gegenji) The Lalafell's ears perked at the familiar voice and Chachanji looked up from his near-constant patting of Aen Reion's mane. "Ah, Koratt! There ya are!" he chirped, pulling on the reins with some more urgent quiet reassurances in fae. "Finally got Gria 'n 'em ta let me leave Il Mheg, so I figgered I'd swing by fer tha' get-t'gether we talked 'bout durin' tha' whole... um... sin eater hunt thin'."

(Metarutaru Koradrix) "Hah! That's amazing that you've earned the Fae's favor! I'll be honest I get a fair bit terrified every time I go there! Only reason I haven't been turned into a leafman, or worse, was because the Nu Mou vouch for me when I visit. Scary place to be!"

(Chachanji Gegenji) "A-ah, it ain't all bad. Ya jus' hafta watch out fer th' pranks. 'n th' tricks. 'n th' kinda random whims. Other'n tha', 's fine..." Chachan offered, though the little list of fae problems made it seem not quite as appealing. Which he seemed to notice, give his awkward smile and dismissive wave. "A-a'course, helpin' deal wit their pro'lems tends ta help a lot... w-whether it be a Pixie 'r a Nu Mou."

(Metarutaru Koradrix) "I can imagine." He nods, "You're braver than most not to have run away from the Pixies, and good on you for it too." Gidgett would sort of lift her head and sniff Chachanji curiously. "Gidgett, down girl." This prompts the wolf to relent, sort of lying on the floor. "Don't mind Gidgett, she's a curious sort, really."

(Chachanji Gegenji) Aen Reion gives the direwolf a withering glare as she drew nearer, giving a bit of a warning snort before Chachan hurriedly pulled lightly on the reins and murmured some more quick words to the horse. "W-well, 's more they wouldn't -let- me, ta be fair," he admitted bashfully once Reion was calmed down again. "There was always a bit of'a fog hangin' 'round 'n it always got extra bad at certain spots. Prolly close ta th' ways outta th' place. Goin' in always kinda ended up wit me back where I-- (Chachanji Gegenji) entered, y'know?"

(Metarutaru Koradrix) "Yeah, that's pixie magic for sure." He nods, then looks to the horse, and couldn't help but have a look of amazement at the sight of it. "I gotta ask, what is this fella's name? Amazing little critter you got there." He waves to the horse, but doesn't try to pet it. He's never seen one before after all, and wouldn't know how to not get bit by one!

(Chachanji Gegenji) Using the word 'critter' go Koratt a glare from the horse itself - did it understand what the Dwarf was saying? Whatever the reason for the look, Chachanji gave the stallion another hurried pat before answering. "A-ah, thi' is Aen Reion. 'm still tryin' ta get 'im ta... well... play nice. 'e's a bit of a stubborn butt," he explained, giving the horse a bit of a pouty glare. "'s much better'n when th' Pixies first introduced 'im ta me. Was part'a th' requirements fer lettin' me leave - ta tame (Chachanji Gegenji) Aen Reion. I-I ain't really sure if'n it was jus' fer laughs 'r they act'lly didn't think I'd be able ta do it but... here we is."

(Metarutaru Koradrix) "Aah... Sorry for insulting ya, Aen Reion, yeah?" He'd apologize to the horse with a chuckle, before looking to Chachanji. "I'll be honest, that's incredible. I've only heard of horses in stories, like the one of Lord Tolthewil and the Knights of the old Elf Kingdom. Never thought I'd actually -see- one in person! Blessed or Cursed by those pixies, who knows, but you're definitely something else." He would say to Chachanji, his tone and look is clearly one of awe, and a bit of admiration, even!

(Chachanji Gegenji) Reion snorted again, but it seemed less... irate, if one could discern the differences between such sounds. "W-well, 'pparently Reion 'ere's been runnin' 'round fer a while. Made a bit of'a name fer 'imself." A proud little whinny from the stallion, though his rider had a bit less of a positive reaction to the praise sent his way. A brief fluster and shake of his head before commenting: "'m-m not all tha' great... 'm-m jus' glad I managed ta do it so I could finally get home."

(Metarutaru Koradrix) "Hey, you helped me take down a Sin Eater, so you're A-OK in my book! And I don't blame ya for being happy to be outta there. Hmm, Theres a few spots you could take a break at now that you're outta that ol' mess of a place. You can definitely use it after all that!" He looks around. There's Clearmelt to the north of us, as well as the town of Sullen to the South. Oh! Also the Crystarium itself, though I'm not sure how much you're in a mood to travel after all that."

(Chachanji Gegenji) "Ah, I act'lly stopped at Clearmelt on th' way 'ere!" Chachan stated with a smile that quickly took on an embarrassed look. "I-I thought -it- was Ostell, act'lly, so I was askin' 'round fer ya fer a bit. Did end up stayin' ta wash up fer a bit... 's been a while since 've had a nice hot soak, y'know?" (Chachanji Gegenji) "'n 'm act'lly headin' t'wards th' Crystarium," he added, looking over to the imposing landmark in the distance. "Gria thin's goin' there might help me figger out a way home. Since there's a big ol' crystal tower like tha' one near me home. Well, kinda near. Near 'nuff."

(Metarutaru Koradrix) "Ahh, gonna have a chat with the Exarch, is that right? Well, if anyone can help you get where you need to go, it's definitely him. Fella's done more for the people than we can ever hope to repay. Hope you don't mind if I tag along!"

(Chachanji Gegenji) "I mean, I wouldn't mind th' company. Not f'miliar wit thi' place 'r th' Crystarium. So havin' someone 'long who does would be much 'ppreciated."

(Metarutaru Koradrix) "No problem! Place is pretty big, so I'll help ya around the place!" He pats Gidgett a few times, which prompts her to get up with a light stretch. "Ready then you are, Chachanji!"

(Chachanji Gegenji) "Oh, ya meant right now?" Chachan interjected with a bit of surprise. "I mean, 'm good ta go if'n ya are... jus' thought we were gonna meet up fer somethin' ta eat 'n drink." A thoughtful pause. "Though, I 'spose th' Crystarium'd have places fer tha' too, huh?"

(Metarutaru Koradrix) "Mhm! Clearmelt and Crystarium would be the best spots for that, but you've already been to the first one, hah!" Metarutaru Koradrix laughs.

(Chachanji Gegenji) "Ah, fair 'nuff, then..." he relented. "I guess we're off tha' way, then. I'll... uh... try'n keep Aen Reion 'ere from goin' too fast. 'e... can really get goin' when 'e wants ta."

(Metarutaru Koradrix) "Don't let Aen here show ya up, Gidgett! Show 'em you're not slouch either!" Gidgett lets out a few barks, as she seemed ready to run!

(Chachanji Gegenji) Reion snorted at that, getting an alarmed look from Chachanji. "A-ah... d-dun get 'im riled up...!" was all he managed before the horse was off like a shot. In a matter of seconds, the stallion was already out of the outpost and down the hill. The Lalafell hadn't been kidding that the horse was fast.

(Metarutaru Koradrix) He looked a fair bit surprised at just how fast it is! But it only prompts Gidgett to really give it her all, chasing after the horse with with vigor!

(Chachanji Gegenji) Aen Reion's apparent fame wasn't without merit, it seemed. Even with Gidgett giving it her all, the fae stallion was pulling further and further ahead. At least until the flailing rider finally managed to grab hold of the reins and FORCE the horse to slow down some, which Reion was none too happy about. There was a lot of snorting and flailing of Reion's head as Koratt finally caught up. But they managed to stay apace, at least, for the remainder of the trip to the Crystarium.

(Metarutaru Koradrix) Upon arriving at the gate, Koratt would explain that He is entering the Crystarium with a friend seeking a place to say, making sure to mention Chachanji is from Kholusia. This would set the guard at ease some and would allow them in, provided Gidgett and Aen are stabled as soon as they reach the Crystarium. (Metarutaru Koradrix) "Okay! We're in, a bit more and we'll be in the city."

(Chachanji Gegenji) Chachan was plenty willing to let Koratt do the talking, since he was also busy trying to calm Aen Reion's temper at being denied a full-on race between him and Gidgett. His ears wiggled at the mention of that Kholusia place, but didn't ask questions. What DID look like would be a problem, was the idea of Reion submitting himself to being stabled.

(Metarutaru Koradrix) "You definitely weren't kidding about how fast that thing is! Hopefully I enjoyed the run some! and well, hoping it doesn't get too mad about being in a stable, but Rules are rules you know?"

(Chachanji Gegenji) "I-I tried ta warn ya," Chachan lamented, continuing to try and calm the stallion. "A-and stablin' 'im might be... a pro'lem, yeah. Ev'n at Clearmelt 'e refused ta be tied up. H-had ta let 'im jus' run free on th' promise 'e'd come back when I called fer 'im."

(Metarutaru Koradrix) "Well... I suppose that is an option you can do.... They ain't gonna let 'em roam around the city freely, too risky to the citizens there."

(Chachanji Gegenji) "Well, yeah, tha's fair," Chachan agreed, slowly dismounting off of Aen Reion. He murmured a few words to the horse in fae. There was a snort from the horse, then the Lalafell added a few more curt words before the horse nodded. Chachan nodded in turn, then let go of the reins. And with that, Reion was off like a shot back down the road - apparently to get the run in that he had been so cruelly denied.

(Metarutaru Koradrix) Koratt couldn't help but snicker a bit. "Yep. Definitely something else." He shook his head with a smile. "C'mon Chachanji, let's head in the city. I think you'll like it. Who knows? Might even give a familiar feeling being back in one."

(Chachanji Gegenji) Chachan turned back to the Dwarf and nodded. "It'll be nice, ta be sure. Feels like 's been moons since 've been in a normal town..." That last bit was punctuated with a bit of a sigh.

(Metarutaru Koradrix) He smiles brightly upon arriving. "Chachanji, Welcome, to the Crystarium! Last bastion of Norvandt, Beacon of Hope, Center of Civilization, all that silliness!" He snickers. "But seriously, welcome!"

(Chachanji Gegenji) "I-it def'nitely looks pretty impressive!" Chachan admitted, his eyes glued to the Crystal Tower itself. He'd seen the other one in Mor Dhona, but always from a distance. He had to wonder if that one felt just as... imposing... as this one did up close.

(Metarutaru Koradrix) "Well, first thing's first. let's get ya attuned to this place. If you ever get lost, you can always use this place as a safe haven to return to, yeah?" (Metarutaru Koradrix) "Well, first thing's first. let's get ya attuned to this place. If you ever get lost, you can always use this place as a safe haven to return to, yeah?" (Metarutaru Koradrix) "Once that's outta the way, we'll get something to eat!"

(Chachanji Gegenji) "Oh, ta th' aetheryte? Y-yeah, tha' might be a good idea." He pauses and blinks. "Should I'a done th' same in Ostall?"

(Metarutaru Koradrix) "Well, Ostall's probably not that important... Unless you're one to enjoy hot springs then maybe, hah! But you can always head back to that later. C'mon!" He would beckon Chachanji to follow him, a bit of pep in his step!

(Chachanji Gegenji) "A-ah, comin'!"

(Metarutaru Koradrix) "Can't help but smile every time I come here. No matter how much of a mess it was out there in Norvandt, this place... I dunno, would just always put me at ease. Everyone here's so eager to help one another. It's like a home away from home..." A content sigh escaped him as he spoke, but shook his head, no need for him to be getting all sentimental.

(Chachanji Gegenji) Chachan pattered quickly after the Dwarf, looking at him as he commented on the Crystarium itself. The idea of everyone helping one another brought a smile to the Lalafell's face, which stayed there as he moved over to the aetheryte itself. Reaching out and closing his eyes, he began the attuning process. Once he had, though, his expression changes slightly - as if he had noticed noticing. Eyes still shut, his brows raised before furrowing.

(Metarutaru Koradrix) He looks to Chachanji with a smile... though his expression confused him. "Something the matter? You can attune to the aetheryte yeah? I know there's a few rare cases of folk being unable to, but I'm sure you're not one of them, right?"

(Chachanji Gegenji) "N-no no, I can attune ta it jus' fine," Chachan stated, though he kept his eyes shut. "'s jus'... I thin' I can feel a link ta one'a th' aetherytes near me home... 's faint... -real- faint, but..." He lowered his arm and opened his eyes to look at Koratt. "I... I might be able ta teleport near home from 'ere!" A bright smile. "I couldn't feel anythin' from th' aetheryte from Il Mheg, mebbe thi' one is jus' close 'nuff?" A pause, then a glance at the Tower. "Or mebbe because'a tha'...?"

(Metarutaru Koradrix) "Wouldn't be shocked if it's on account of the Tower. It is very magical like that. This tower kinda came outta nowhere when it did, and it was around for a long time. Before me, My Pa, or even Grandpappy I think. When it did something about it just drew folks together from all over. Humes, Mystel, Drahn, Ronso, Elves, Galdjent... even Vhis and Dwarves, which usually aren't ones for traveling. Something about that tower, and the Crystal Exarch who resides in it, is mysterious... powerful, even."

(Chachanji Gegenji) Chachan followed Koratt towards the Tower as he talked, looking up at it - even more impressive even just a few hundred yalms closer like this. He gave the Dwarf a look of confusion at the strange names for the various races, but quickly assumed it was just the culture for this part of Hydaelyn and didn't interject. "Well, it IS plenty powerful-lookin'," he admitted. "'n kinda pretty. Wonder if'n th' one near me home looks thi' neat up close..."

(Metarutaru Koradrix) "Near your home?... You mean there's more than one of these?" He would look up, wide-eyed. It surely didn't sound like there could be, but the way things have been since the Flood, and the more recent events with Night returning, who knows at this point! "If there's another... Hmm..." He ponders it for a bit, but shakes his head. That probably wouldn't be like he thinks it is. Nonetheless. "Hey, I did promise you food n' drink. So c'mon! My treat."

(Chachanji Gegenji) "Oh! Right! Almost f'rgot wit Reion bein' all grumpy 'n findin' out I might be able ta jus'... -teleport- home from 'ere!" Chachan chirped, looking to Koratt. "I'll... um... hafta warn ya. I... ah... tend ta eat a lot. 'specially if'n thi' teleport is gonna be anythin' like when I came back from Yanxia. Real long teleports like tha' really take it outta ya, y'know?"

(Metarutaru Koradrix) The heck is a Yanxia, he would wonder, but there's questions that can be answered as they eat. He nods and smiles, calling Chachanji over to follow to the Musica Universalis Markets. (Metarutaru Koradrix) "The place is always bustling! Regardless of how many turns of the sun or moon cycle, you'll see people moving about here!"

(Chachanji Gegenji) "Oh, Ul'dah's like tha' all th' time," Chachan offered with a smile. "Ya get used ta it." A pause. "... though, I 'spose I'll hafta get RE-used ta it after all thi'." (Chachanji Gegenji) "Still not quite used ta ev'rythin' not bein' all super colorful like in Il Mheg."

(Metarutaru Koradrix) "I'll need to visit all these places you're talking about. Yanxia, Ul'Dah, never heard of any of those places before! Wonder if you live as far away a land as the Exarch does?" He would wonder a bit. "Sounds like places he would know about. Anyhow! Take a seat and I'll get some orders in."

(Chachanji Gegenji) "Ah, mebbe!" Chachan offered with a cheerful shrug. "They're all neat places 'n worth visitin', I figger." A nod and then he goes hunting for a nice place to sit.

(Metarutaru Koradrix) As Chachanji went to get a seat, he walks over to Glynard. Chachanji may see Koratt smiling brightly, laughing some with the man as he placed his order, nodding to him as they spoke. Once the order is placed, he smiles and walks back over to the table Chachanji chose, and took a seat himself. "Okay! Order's placed. Expect some good eats real soon!"

(Chachanji Gegenji) "Ah, I hope so!" Chachan stated with a nod as Koratt sat down. "Th' fae food is... akay, but it's mostly a lotta fruit 'n mushrooms, y'know? 'n I always felt bad after I... ah... got back ta normal size since 'm always starvin' somethin' fierce after it." A bit of a frown crosses his features as he thinks on it. "Always end up havin' ta help restock th' food stores afterward 'cuz I ate most'a it."

(Metarutaru Koradrix) "Well! I told 'em you're from pretty far away, like Exarch far, So it oughta be some real good stuff. maybe something you're familiar with!"

(Chachanji Gegenji) "We'll see! Honestly, jus' havin' some good meats 'n popotoes 'n stuff'd be best." (Chachanji Gegenji) "Somethin' hearty, y'know?"

(Metarutaru Koradrix) "Then you're in for a treat!" He smiles brightly. There would be quite a few plates on the table! A sweet shellfish stew in tomato broth, along with a blood tomato salad with a dark vinegar topping, a big plate of peppered popotoes to be shared as well. For himself, Koratt got a nice big mug of ale, while for Chachanji, the drink he got was apparently something the Exarch appreciated. (Metarutaru Koradrix) (also, Matcha tea!)

(Chachanji Gegenji) Chachan went wide-eyed at the spread, mostly focusing on the stew and popotoes more than the greens - but that was probably to be expected considering living on a fae diet for a couple moons. He made a bit of a face at the tea - tea was always his brother's favorite, not his - but tried to mask it as best he could. Though, the success of that would be mired a little by his request to the waiter before they returned: "Ah, could I also get a glass'a Cham--" A pause. "Um... some fruit juice 'n-- (Chachanji Gegenji) --sweetwater if'n ya have it?"

(Metarutaru Koradrix) The waiter nods and leaves to get the request. "Aaaah, not a fan of the stuff? My apologies. Probably should've asked you first!"

(Chachanji Gegenji) "A-ah, 's fine, 's fine!" Chachan stated as he started filling a plate with stew and popotoes. "Tea is all well'n good but... 've always been a fan'a juice, ev'n after spendin' all tha' time wit th' fae."

(Metarutaru Koradrix) "Fair enough! Personally a bit of alcohol helps me through the day, always!" He laughs a bit before taking a swig of ale, and snagging himself some popotoes and some of the salad first, wasting no time in digging in. "Dom't be affphraid to chow dhown, yheh?" He would say with his mouth kinda full as he ate happily.

(Chachanji Gegenji) "Ah, I dun really drink alcohol much, meself," he admitted bashfully as he began tucking in as well, the food on his plate disappearing at a frightening rate into the little Lalafell. He honestly seemed to be on pace to down the entire spread himself without too much difficulty, though he did make sure Koratt got all he wanted too. "Only had a drink'r two while at home."

(Metarutaru Koradrix) "Well, I feel a lad or lass would appreciate a fella who ain't a drunk, so good on ya! Also don't be afraid to ask for more! Eat til' you're stuffed!" He laughs heartily before resuming his meal, the waiter bringing the drink Chachanji requested.

(Chachanji Gegenji) Most of the food had already "mysteriously" disappeared by the time the waiter had returned, so Chachan sheepishly asked for a refill on everything else even as he nodded in thanks for his change of drink. Once they were away preparing more, he looked back to Koratt with a timid sip of his beverage. "A-ah, I 'unno if'n it's worth all tha' much praise. I jus' get... um... more talky 'n stuff when drunk." And more huggy, but he wasn't about to openly admit that. "So... i-it jus' seems safer ta do (Chachanji Gegenji) stuff like tha' at home rather'n when 'm out 'n about."

(Metarutaru Koradrix) "Ah, fair 'nough, fair 'nough. So! How're ya enjoying the Crystarium? I know we haven't shown much, but hey!" He laughs a bit, happily eating his fill and relaxing some... but not too much, lest he lean back and fall off the barstool like last time.

(Chachanji Gegenji) "'s nice!" Chachan admitted immediately, looking about. "Nice ta be 'mongst other, non-fae peoples. And in a proper city 'n stuff, one not made outta lil' homes in hillsides or giant mushrooms."

(Metarutaru Koradrix) "Very different from Il Mheg for sure! Glad you're enjoying your time here! Was a bit worried you'd be too overwhelmed, shy sort you seem to be from earlier." He couldn't help but giggle. "But in all seriousness! Glad you're enjoying yourself, Chachanji."

(Chachanji Gegenji) "I-I ain't THA' shy!" he insisted with a pout and a fluster, followed by a slightly sulking sip of his drink. "'n-n 's more like comin' back ta somethin' f'miliar after bein' on a vacation fer a while, y'know? A vacation full'a pranks 'n monster-huntin'."

(Metarutaru Koradrix) "Okay okay! Not thaaat shy, hehe! And monster hunting sounds like a fun vacation to me! Not so much the fairy pranks though. Could do with alot less of those." He shook his head, before finishing his mug, having had a few swigs here and there as they were speaking. "But hey! It's good to hear, and who knows? Maybe the Exarch can help you find a way back? He's a nice guy, always has time to hear what folks have to say. With any luck he can help get you home safe n' sound!"

(Chachanji Gegenji) "I dun really like fightin', though," he admitted with a sigh, rubbing at the back of his neck and looking back down towards the Aetheryte plaza. "'n hopefully I'll be able ta teleport proper-like back home... but I 'spose it can't hurt seein' if'n I can't talk ta this Exarch guy ya keep mentionin'."

(Metarutaru Koradrix) "Ya should, really. but here I am being all pushy!" He shook his head. "I see, then maybe the Crystalline Mean is more your style? It's a center area within the Crystarium. Crafters from all over Norvandt gather there to trade, buy, sell, and learn from one another. From Smiths, to Carpenters, Weavers to Alchemists. Anything you need would probably be there!"

(Chachanji Gegenji) Chachan nods. "Tha' sounds nicer, yeah. 'm a smith by trade, act'lly. Armor mostly, but I also make tools 'n do repairs 'n stuff," he clarifies. "Act'lly managed ta make a lil smithy in a lil cave in Il Mheg. Most'a th' Pixies didn't like it - they dun like smoke 'n metal 'n stuff." (Chachanji Gegenji) "... Though tha' was nice ta get 'way from them fer a bit now 'n then."

(Metarutaru Koradrix) "You're bold or bonkers doing that. More gutsy than me I'll tell you that! Well, I'd enjoy the time here while you can, yeah? Dunno when you'll leave but you claim it's super far away. Who know when you'll be back, yeah?" (Metarutaru Koradrix) He smiles. "Enjoy yourself here while you -are- here, after all!"

(Chachanji Gegenji) "W-well, I needed a place ta do me work... plus th' Nu Mou helped set it up. Lil' mushroom house 'n ev'rythin'," he explained further. "'s-sides, th' Pixies figgered out pretty quick tha' they could keep me outta it by makin' me too big ta fit inta th' cave... or get me out doin' th' same..." A sigh and a scratching at the cheek. "S-so, 's kinda nice ta be away from all tha'. 'course, Gria could be floatin' 'round somewheres nearby wit'out me knowin' so I gotta watch what 'm sayin'..." (Chachanji Gegenji) "Dun want them decidin' ta do tha' while 'm in th' city 'ere..." (Chachanji Gegenji) "While home might be super far 'way, I DO wanna be able ta come back 'ere. 'n ev'n go back ta Il Mheg ta visit now'n then..." One couldn't tell if the latter was because he actually liked being there, or if was part of some promise made as part of being allowed to leave.

(Metarutaru Koradrix) "Mmh, I see I see...." He ponders this and nods, a smile appearing on his face. "Well, if you do come back to this side of the world, do let me know! Always enjoy company of a friend, which frankly one can never have too many, yeah!" Metarutaru Koradrix smiles at you. (Metarutaru Koradrix) He would pay for the food and drink which... admittedly was more than he expected. a good bit more really... but! He said he's paying it and damn it he's keeping his word.

(Chachanji Gegenji) "A'course!" he responded immediately. "'m always up fer meetin' up 'n hangin' out wit friends, so ya know I'll try'n find ya if'n 'm in th' area." A pause. "Um. Is there any good way ta reach ya? Linkpearl'r somethin'? They dun seem ta have range 'nuff ta reach back home, but 'm sure if'n 'm 'round 'ere I should be able ta reach ya by one."

(Metarutaru Koradrix) "Hmmm...." He ponders.... "Best I can think is simply asking! The folks at Clan Nutsy know me well enough, and If you go to them they can give a good idea as to where I'm at. They have a chapter in the city here so it's safe, no running about aimlessly. Heck, they may be able to contact me themselves afterwards so I can come on by!" (Metarutaru Koradrix) He realizes he might not know what the heck Clan Nutsy is. "They're a group of monster hunters, keeping the bad beasties in check for the good of the people. I'm a part of them!"

(Chachanji Gegenji) "Clan Nutsy?" Chachan echoes. "Guess I'll hafta go see them 'long wit thi' Crystal-Mean place 'n tha' Exarch guy a'fore I go, huh?" (Chachanji Gegenji) "... 's turnin' inta quite th' list'a thin's I gotta do a'fore I try teleportin' home, isn't it?" A chuckle.

(Metarutaru Koradrix) "Heh!... Sorry for givin' ya all that... Just there's so much to look at around here in the Crystarium! The great Library at the Cabinet of Curiosity, the Hortorium which has all sorts of plants gathered and saved from all around the world, the Temenos Rookery which houses all the creatures used for travel, and combat as well, it's a grand city!"

(Chachanji Gegenji) "Well, I 'spose 's fair," Chachan admitted. "Comin' ta a new place like thi', it'd be kinduva shame ta jus' jump fer home rather'n look 'round some. I mean... 've been gone fer a bit as is..." He scratches at his floofy mass of hair. "I 'spose takin' a couple bells more ta look 'round 'ere a'fore leavin' can't hurt." (Chachanji Gegenji) "Tha' or jus' thin's ta visit th' next time 'm back 'round. Depends how much teleportin' back wears me out."

(Metarutaru Koradrix) "Enjoy your time here, then head on home with tales of this land, Norvandt! Maybe folks will believe you, maybe they won't! But hey. You've been to the place yourself, you know it exists." He nods lightly." And who knows? Maybe someday the opposite will occur, and I'll be able to see your land. This 'Ool'Dah' and 'Koo-gah-neigh' places you've mentioned. I bet they're like nothing I've ever witnessed before." A bit of wonderment was in his tone, and almost a bit of longing. There's more to the - (Metarutaru Koradrix) world that the Flood of Light hasn't destroyed? Places that may be just as fantastical as he's heard of in stories before the Flood... It gives him an look of hope to him that may no doubt seem odd to Chachanji, considering.

(Chachanji Gegenji) Chachan mostly just misinterpreted it as being curious to see other parts of the world - he got that, having left Doma to see Eorzea. As such, he gives an energetic nod. "A'course! If'n yer in th' area, def'nitely call me up! I can show ya 'round Ul'dah 'n me proper smithy 'n stuff! Kugane 'n Yanxia might be a bit of a trip on top'a all tha' but... 's def'nitely worth seein', I thin'!"

(Metarutaru Koradrix) Koratt smiles brightly at that. "I'm going to hold you to that, Chachanji." He nods lightly. A bit of a sad sigh comes out of him though, as he listened to something from his own linkpearl. "Shame I can't stick around much longer, though. Seems Clan Nutsy needs my help taking down another beastie, over in Amh Araeng." He shook his head. "I'm sorry I gotta leave like this. But as long as you stay in the city, you'll be safe, for sure. Explore the city as you like or head on home and keep it in - (Metarutaru Koradrix) mind on your next trip, yeah? I uh, heh, look forward to seeing ya again when you do, yeah?"

(Chachanji Gegenji) Chachan canted his head. Amh Araeng? A whole other area he hadn't heard of yet, along with that Kholusia place. Definitely was a lot left to see on this side of Hydaelyn, to be sure! Still, at the apology, Chachan shook his head with a smile. "Hey, beatin' up those thin's keeps folks safe, ain't nothin' ta be sorry 'bout," he stated. "'n ya bet I'll try'n reach out ta ya th' next time 'm 'round these parts."

(Metarutaru Koradrix) Koratt nods lightly with a smile, hopping down and... Admittedly not really as good around folks as his demeanor and chatter would imply, just figure to shake Chachanji's hand with a nod. "Don't be a stranger, yeah?"

(Chachanji Gegenji) Chachan hopped off his own stool to return the shake. "A-ah, a'course. Ya too! 'n be careful wit tha' beast in Ahn Mereg or whatev'r tha' place is called."

(Metarutaru Koradrix) He snickers a bit at how Chachan said it, and nods! "You bet! It'll be a cinch! I'll see ya soon, Chachanji!" And with that, he waves to him and starts jogging down towards the entrance to the Crystarium, to pick up Gidgett and begin his trek to his next hunt!

(Chachanji Gegenji) Chachan waved as Koratt darted off, seguing into scratching at his cheek once the Dwarf was gone. Well, what was next then? Visiting Clan Nutsy? The Crystalline Mean? Or perhaps that Exarch fellow? He had quite the surprise itinerary now before he tried teleporting home, and he wasn't sure where to start.