#im normal about stan guys

[funnybunnyfuzie]

BOOOO OLD PEOPLE!!!

self ship commission for @funnybunnyfuzie !!!!

[nerdy-hyperfixations]

"Ford is intellectually smart and Stan is emotionally smart" is a statement that makes me want to nose dive into academic studies in order to single-handedly redefine the categories of intelligence because that *cant* be right.

[skitskatdacat63]

Roleswap anyone??

Tell me Fernando wouldn't make a fantastic general/emperor, and that Napoleon wouldn't make a fanastic driver/tp!!

[tsugaruu]

I'm ashamed to say this but it took me almost eight years to realise why Dazai says “Chuuya” so much. I mean, it's nothing mind-blowing or shocking it's just???? sounds so nice???? Like???? It rolls off your tongue so nicely I kid you not I don't even use “he” to refer to him anymore. It's just same as Dazai lmao it sounds so nice and cute like abssbsvahab

Anyways, stan Chuuya guys ✌️

[strawmyberry]

thank u for the kyle tickle hcs... him being the most ticklish out of the m4 AND being weakest to light tickling is SO IMPORTANT TO ME

you get me anon!!! lee kyle is so cute!! so cute in fact- i got a little surpriseeee! thank you all so much for all the kind words on my first fic!! im so glad you guys liked it 🥹 soooo…here’s another one!! i hope you guys like it!! thanks again!!

— ❤️🍓 strawberry 🍓❤️

🍓🍓🍓🍓🍓🍓🍓🍓🍓🍓

B for Broflovski!

Lee Kyle / Ler Stan

Word Count: 4,229

With Kyle panicking over the “horrible” grade he got on his History test, Stan puts a little extra effort into convincing him that “B” doesn’t always have to stand for “Bad.” In fact, to him, it stands for something a thousand times better.

❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Stan knew Kyle was a perfectionist. Kyle knew Kyle was a perfectionist. The entire town of South Park knew Kyle was a perfectionist; yet, somehow, despite that, Stan was never really prepared for when Kyle would have one of those days.

“It’s bullshit, dude! I’m telling you; it’s fucking bullshit! Mr. Garrison has some kinda’ personal vendetta against me. I fucking hate him! ‘Fucking asshole, it’s ridiculous!”

Stan had gotten used to walking quickly besides Kyle since Kyle had the tendency to walk and talk, especially when he was in a bad mood. Luckily for Stan, he was pretty good at keeping up.

“And Cartman? Oooh, ‘fucking Cartman? I’m going to kick his ass- I deal with a lot of shit from him. I take it! I suck it up and I take it! But this? I’m done. I’m going to shove my foot so far up his ass- I swear to god-“

Stan had tried a million strategies when it came to this issue, and he had found that the best thing to do was to let Kyle get all of it out of his system. Let him ramble, eventually he’d get tired of it. After that is when he’d be able to talk logically with his, figure out what to do next.

“The only reason he got an A was because he cheated off of Tolkien. But, of course, Garrison doesn’t see it! As if it’s not the most obvious thing in the world! It’s so fucking dumb dude, I seriously can’t- Ma, I’m home! Stan’s here too, we’re gonna go upstairs, okay?”

Okay, Stan had to admit, it was a little funny how Kyle’s rage was like an on and off switch when it came to his mom. He’d be cursing up a storm one second and the next he’d go all Positive Paul on him. He’d shout a quick hello to Kyle’s mom too, because…manners, before following Kyle up the stairs and into his room.

“It just- It pisses me off so much! It’s not fair- I studied so hard for that stupid test!”

Stan would place his backpack next to Kyle’s dresser. He’d proceeded to chase the redhead around his room a little bit, stopping his endless pacing for a second so he could take the backpack off his friend’s back. He’d plop it next to his own before throwing himself onto Kyle’s bed, already getting himself comfortable. Knowing Kyle, this could go on for…god know how long.

“I fucking hate South Park…”

Kyle loved to rant and rave, yeah. It always made him feel a lot better- since he was able to get all his anger out without punching a hole in his wall. But…he could only talk for so long without breathing. So, he’d take a small break, just so he could regain his breath. Kyle would turn back to Stan- only to see the position he was in.

Stan was laying in his bed. Yes- yes that’s what beds are for- but Stan was laying in his bed. Like, laying in his bed. Head amidst a sea of pillows, body sinking slightly into the soft mattress, limbs languidly sprawled across the bed; the whole works. “Oh- sorry, ‘you done?” He’d ask, his words muffled by all of the pillows around his head.

“Uh…no. Not yet. Sorry- I can stop if you’d like-“

“No! No, keep going. I’m all ears.”

“Ooookay…?” Kyle would nod, confused as hell. How long had he been like that? How didn’t he notice before? Why was he messing up his pillows? Well- now he couldn’t remember where he had left off. He’d stare at the bed post as his mind wandered, trying to retrace his steps. Oh! Yeah! Hating South Park!

“…I think today was stupid.” Kyle would start, starting the tirade off slowly. “Everything about it, yeah, but the changing seats thing was really stupid.” He’d continue, the momentum slowly picking up as he spoke. He was getting the hang of it again!

“I mean, I get the changing seats thing. But I told him! I said, “Mr. Garrison, please keep me next to Stan. He keeps me focused.” Which is true because you’re one of the only ones in class who isn’t a total moron. And even when you are- you don’t do it to annoy me- you just-“

“Wait. Uh-go back? …Why am I being called a moron? What did I do?” Sitting up from his extremely habitable position, Stan would raise his left eyebrow; his face laced with confusion. Stan would usually listen to everything Kyle had to say before talking, but that little comment about him just threw him for a loop.

“Huh? I’m not calling you a moron, dude.”

“Uh…you just did though?”

“Did I? Really?” A flicker of his own confusion would cross his face, accompanied by a subtle furrowing of his brow as he stood there for his moment. He’d tap his foot, humming a bit as he thought before it clicked. Kyle’s face would turn white. “Oh shit.” His eyes would widen, quickly holding his hands up in defense. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it like that…I don’t think you’re a moron…sorry..”

“No, I know. It’s okay, man, really!” Stan would give a reassuring smile, letting the comment just slide off his shoulders. “You’re upset, dude, it’s all good.” Stan had gotten used to that too. Kyle was a very…passionate person- he’d go really big when it came to his rants. Stan knew better than to actually take offense to anything Kyle said when he was in one of those moods.

“Yeah…It’s just- maybe I get Garrison not putting us together because we’re Super Best Friends. I mean- I don’t really get it- but I could see the logic behind it. But, at the very least, he could’ve sat me next to someone who wasn’t a total asshole! Sit me next to Craig! He’s quiet! Or Tolkien! Tweek! Jimmy! Butters! I would’ve been fine with anyone! Anyone! Except, Cartman! And guess what happens! Guess who I get sat next to! Guess!”

Stan would nod along as he listened, staying sat up this time instead of going to lay back down again. He wouldn’t really notice he was supposed to answer the question at first. He thought it was rhetorical! After all, he was literally there. He saw all of this happen already. But…okay? He’d play along? “Uh…Cart..man?”

“Fucking Cartman! I’m pissed, but I’m like: “OK, whatever, I can deal with this, no big deal.” But then, I’m in the middle of the test- the test. ‘You know? The thing where you’re supposed to do your own work and shut the fuck up while you do it? And for some goddamn reason-he just won’t shut the fuck up! And I’m thinking: “Is it really that hard to just shut your fucking mouth for five seconds?” But, whatever, I studied for this test so I’m gonna get a good grade on it! Right? No! Fucking no! ‘Cause it’s let’s all dog on Kyle day! And I think his voice was just so fucking grating- I just forgot half of the shit that I studied! He fucked me! He literally fucked me!”

Man. Who needed TV? Who needed Assassins Creed, Indiana Jones, and Lego Batman when you had Kyle Broflovski as your super angry, Super Best Friend? He was basically free entertainment at this point! Stan’s eyes would follow Kyle around the room, and Kyle was moving so much it looked like Stan was watching a tennis match.

“-And you know what really upsets me? ‘You know what just irks me like just a little bit? The fact that I know I’m gonna have to walk in the school tomorrow, and Wendy is gonna come up to me-and she’s gonna be like, “Oh, Kyle! How did you do on the history test? I’m really happy with my grade!” And I’m gonna have to be like, “Oh yeah, Wendy! I’m sure you are!” And then she’s gonna rub it in my face like she always does-“

“What? Wendy doesn’t rub her grades in your face…” Stan would, admittedly, get a little defensive at that statement. This was his girlfriend they were talking about! And…well- she wasn’t here to defend her own honor like he knew she would’ve liked to- so he was gonna do it for her! “Wendy wouldn’t try to make you feel bad about yourself, Kyle-“ Stan would start to say, cutting himself off when Kyle randomly pointed his index finger at him.

“You know what’s funny? I knew you were going to say that!” Kyle would argue, his eyes lit with a combo of satisfaction and frustration. “I knew you were going to defend Wendy! You’re biased, Stan!”He’d accuse. “She rubs her grades in my face all the time! You just turn a blind eye to it because you’re biased!”

“What are you talking about? Dude, if anything, I’d be biased towards you. I’ve known you longer.” Stan would jump to defend himself, rolling her eyes as he did. “I’m sorry if she’s hurt your feelings, Kyle, but I’m sure there’s no bad blood there.” That was a bit of a half-assed apology. Again, Kyle was ranting- so Stan had no idea if he actually meant half of the shit he was saying. He just wanted to resolve the situation.

“Oh, yeah. I’m sure it’s not a big deal to you! You’re not the one who’s gonna be ridiculed for getting a B on the test!” Kyle would retort, crossing his arms as he huffed.

“I’m sorry…what?” Stan looked stunned. Staring at Kyle as if he had three heads, Stan would open his mouth to speak- just to cut himself off before he managed to say anything. He was trying to think of a nice way to put this. Really really hard. “…Run that by me again?”

“Don’t be an asshole! I got a B, okay?! It’s embarrassing- I know!”

“…Dude.” Stan would pinch the arch of his nose, letting out a long, irritated sigh. “That’s what this is about? Seriously?” He’d clarify. “…This whole time, I thought you had gotten an F- or, at the very best, a D. You got a B?” Stan wasn’t even mad, honestly. Actually, he was a little bit impressed. “Kyle…” At this point, Stan couldn’t help but laugh. There was no way this was actually happening. “A B is a good grade, dude. You have nothing to worry about.”

Now, Stan knew he was one to say stupid things sometimes- but this time, he could’ve sworn that what he said was actually a little bit smart. But the look Kyle was giving him? It almost made him doubt himself. Kyle was looking at him as if he had just said he puts milk in the bowl before the cereal. His jaw would drop, holding his hand out in front of him in shocked horror. “…You did not just say that to me.”

“Kyle, seriously, you’re wigging out over nothing!” Stan would try to explain, getting up from the bed. “You don’t need to beat yourself up over this. It’s just a B! A B is, what? …80%? That’s good! That’s really good!”

“I can’t believe you’re actually telling me this right now! You have to be shitting me! Do you even know what the B stands for, Stan?” Kyle would ask, the look on his face saying that he already knew the answer. “Do you? Do you, Mr. Isaac Newton? Care to enlighten me?”

“Jesus Christ…” Stan would grumble, rolling his eyes yet again. He’d stand there for a second, shrugging the question off. “…I dunno, brilliant?”

“Brilliant?” Kyle would repeat. “Brilliant?!” Kyle’s eye would twitch, as if Stan had just said the most absurd thing he had ever said. “No! It stands for BAD. Bad, Stan! B. A. D. Bad!”

“B doesn’t stand for Bad…” Stan would state. “F stands for bad.”

“Bad doesn’t start with a F, Stan!” Kyle would scream, frustrated. “B stands for Bad, Bummer, Buffoon- think of a word that starts with a B- nine times out of ten it’s a negative connotation! It’s the most obvious thing in the world!”

“I know that YOU’D be happy to get a B- but I’m perfectly valid in being upset about it! God!”

Ouch.

The air in the room was tense; and the silence that came after Kyle’s groan didn’t really help that. They’d stare at each other for a solid minute, waiting for the other one to say something. In that moment of stillness, Kyle had to opportunity to realize how mean what he said just sounded. In that moment, Kyle would brace for impact. He expected Stan to scream at him- or storm out the door and never come back. But…Stan didn’t do any of that.

Stan would take a deep breath. A long one. “…Okay.” He’d say, breaking the silence. “You need to chill out.” Kyle would open his mouth to apologize or, at the very least, give Stan a verbal agreement- but Stan would quickly cut him off.

“You broke Baseball Rules.”

Kyle’s eyes would widen. Shit. No. No- he didn’t. Did he? Oh god. No- he definitely did. Fuck! “…Y-You didn’t tell me we were playing Baseball Rules.” Kyle would hold his hands up in defense, backing up slightly.

“I don’t have to tell you when we’re playing Baseball Rules. That’s the whole point- we don’t have to repeat the rules, they’re just in place.” Stan would remind, a mischievous smile creeping onto his face. “You said three really fucked up things about me. Three strikes. You’re out. You broke Baseball Rules.”

Baseball Rules was a game created by Stan, a game that Kyle reluctantly participated in. The rules were simple, whenever the two were in an a little tiff, if either of them slung three insults in a row, they’d strike out.

Stan made the game in order to prevent the two from blowing up at each other, and it worked pretty well! But, admittedly, Baseball Rules wouldn’t be half as effective if it weren’t for what came after you struck out. That worked like a charm every single time.

“Stan, wait…” Kyle would try to reason, glancing behind him quickly to try to get an idea of how far he was from the door. Maybe he could run if he tried hard enough? “I’m sorry, dude…I don’t think you’re stupid, really-“

“I know you don’t!” Stan would cut Kyle’s apologizes short, stepping forward with the attempt of cornering him. “I’m not mad at you! But…rules are rules! If I let you get away with it this time- where do I draw the line, ya’ know? I’m sure you understand.”

Kyle would yelp at Stan stepping forward, quickly turning himself around to dash around him. “Just this once! I’m really sorry- I won’t do it again! I’m not upset anymore-“

“That’s great!” Stan would exclaim. “I’m glad you’re not upset anymore! But it’s the principle of Baseball Rules. I really wish I didn’t have to! I wanna let you off easy, really!” He didn’t. He knew he didn’t, Kyle knew that too. Just like how Stan knew Kyle well enough to know that he’d try to run around him; that’s why he’d turn as well, cornering Kyle officially.

“Stahahan!” Kyle would stumble backwards, his legs hitting his bed. He’d sink to the floor, already beginning to kick his legs. “It’s just a made up gahahame! Plehehease!”

“I’m not even touching you yet!” Stan would tease, wiggling his fingers right above Kyle’s hips. “I’ll go easy, okay?” He’d sink down right after him, sitting down in front of him.

“Noho! Nohot okahay! DohohOHOHON’T-“

“Don’t tickle your ears or your neck. I know, I know!” Stan would cut Kyle’s desperate pleas short, abruptly beginning to drill his fingers into his hips. “You’d think I’d know how to tickle my Super Best Friend. I can’t believe you’d think I wouldn’t! You cut me deep, Kyle.”

“That’s nohot-!” Kyle would shake his head, cutting himself off as he started to impulsively swing his arms in defense. Kyle was way too ticklish as it was, but Stan’s constant teasing was making it a thousand times worse.

“I knowww, that’s not what you were going to say. You were going to ask me not to tickle you, and…” Stan couldn’t keep the shit eating grin off of his face. “…you know I’m not gonna do that.” He’d laugh, fighting back the urge to make fun of how red Kyle’s face was.

“Stohohop ihihit! Plehehease, I’m sohohorry!” Kyle wouldn’t even last ten seconds before pleading for mercy. That was one of Stan’s favorite things about playing Baseball Rules, besides being able to hear Kyle’s laugh. That was always first on the list.

“I know you’re sorry! I forgive you!” He’d reassure, managing to dodge every punch Kyle threw at him. “Let’s do this, okay? You let me get a few words out, and then I’ll let you go, okay? I’ll stop tickling you once I’m done.”

Kyle wasn’t 100% sure how legit that offer was. Normally, Stan would stop when he wanted to- so it really depended on how merciful he was feeling on that day. For all Kyle knew, Stan could just say sike and keep going. But…at the same time, maybe he wouldn’t. If anything, he might as well take the bait.

“Okahahay okahahay!”

“Okay? Great!” Stan would smile, moving his hands from his hips to his sides, squeezing them as he began speaking. “I get that you like getting A’s. That makes sense- everyone likes getting them. But it’s okay to not get them sometimes. You shouldn’t be stressing yourself out about your grades, you’re doing an awesome job with them.”

“Buhut-“ Kyle would start, just to be cut off by Stan suddenly skittering his fingers against his ribs. “SHIHihihit!! Ohoh my goHOHOhod! Dohohon’t doHOHO thahahat!!” Kyle would squeal loudly, his eyes flying open as his kicking and punching intensified.

“I’m not done yet!” Stan would sing-song, poking in between each rib for each syllable. The shit-eating grin on his face would only grow as he continued. “As I was saying; you’re doing awesome, dude! I’m not saying you shouldn’t focus on your grades- i’m saying you shouldn’t stress yourself out about them.” Stan would clarify.

“Your grades don’t determine how smart you are. And, either way, you have some kick ass grades, dude! You are the smartest person I know, Kyle-“

“Thahahat’s nohohot trUHUHUE- OHOH MY GOHOHOD- FUHUHUCK OHohohoff!!”

Stan would jokingly roll his eyes at Kyle’s cackling, shaking his head softly. “I’m barely even touching you!” That was true, all he was doing was fluttering his fingers over his stomach. Of course, he knew how effective that was- he just chose to play dumb. ‘Made things more fun!

“It is so true.” Stan would insist, his tone genuine and honest. “…And if you even try to tell me I know Wendy, I’m gonna roll up your jacket. Don’t fuck with me.” He’d playfully threaten. “Wendy doesn’t count. Wendy- Wendy is different. That’s the thing- you guys are both smart. And we’re allowed to have two smart people in South Park. With the amount of morons we have- god knows we could use ‘em.”

“Kyle, I wouldn’t be calling you smart if you weren’t. You are so smart, dude! You know fucking Pig Latin! Do you know anyone else who knows Pig Latin?”

“YOHOHOU!” Kyle would retort, doubling over with laughter. “YOHohohou knohohow pihig lahatin tohohohoo!” He’d would swing at Stan’s face yet again, not expecting it to horrible backfire like it did. Stan would take the swing as an opportunity to snake his hands under his arms, quickly skittering his nails all over his armpits.

“Because you taught me it, Kyle!” Stan would exclaim, having to hold back his own laughter as Kyle shrieked. “You ran right into my point! You make me smarter! I would be a total moron if it weren’t for you! Do you know the amount of times I’m stuck on something and I think to myself, “What would Kyle do?” You’re a genius, dude!”

Maybe it was the fact that he was laughing so hard, or maybe it was the surplus of compliments Stan was dumping onto him. But, either way, Kyle was bright red; practically screaming with laughter as he tried to sink himself into the floor. An effort that was obviously in vain. His arms were slammed tightly down against Stan’s fingers in an effort to protect himself; of course, not even realizing until after the fact that it was having to opposite effect.

“S-STAHAHAHAHAN!”

“Okay, okay I’m almost done!” Stan would quickly say, yanking his hands out from under Kyle’s arms; moving them back to his stomach, lightly skittering his fingers again. “All of this is to say- you’re being too hard on yourself! You are more than a grade you get on a test- putting aside the fact that a B is already a good grade!

“And- you know what? B doesn’t stand for Bad!”

And with that, Stan would still his fingers. The two of them would sit there, Kyle immediately noticing how Stan didn’t seem to be making any attempt of getting up. He’d still be giggling from the aftermath, eyeing Stan up and down expectingly.

“…One more thing.”

Of fucking course!

“…What does B stand for, Kyle?”

Oh shit. Shit. He was fucked. The truth of the matter was Kyle had no clue. It obviously wasn’t Bad. But…he didn’t really know what answer Stan wanted from him. From the expectant look on Stan’s face, he obviously already had an answer in mind. Kyle would think long and hard, searching every crevice of his brain in the hopes that somehow, someway, the answer would magically come to him.

“…Beheheautiful?”

“Ohhh…that’s a good one..” Stan would say in mock amazement, beginning to turn; as if he was about to get up. Kyle would let out a sigh of relief, thanking the universe for sparing him this time. The funny thing about that, though? He wasn’t. Stan would swiftly turn back around, making a buzzer noise to signify that Kyle had gotten the wrong answer before blowing a quick raspberry on his neck.

It all happened so fast, Kyle didn’t even have time to say anything- the only thing that left his mouth was a screech; jolting so hard that he yanked himself away from Stan, falling onto his side. He’d quickly scrunch his neck, along with covering it with his hands.

Kyle was too busy giggling on the floor to realize that Stan had gotten up, walked back over to Kyle’s backpack, and came back with his water bottle. He’d sit next to him, offering his hand to help him up. Kyle would hesitantly take it, a relieved sigh escaping him as Stan pulled him up- no strings attached.

“Broflovski.”

“Whahahat?”

Kyle would raise his eyebrow with giggly confusion. Stan had never referred to him by his last name. They were strictly on a first name basis! Stan would return the confused look with his own confused look. After a few seconds, his eyes would widen as he realized why Kyle looked so confused. He’d shake his head, beginning to chuckle softly.

“Noho! Broflovski! B is for Broflovski!”

It would take a second for Kyle to understand what Stan was saying. Once it clicked, Kyle would turn to Stan, a fed-up smile on his face. God, he was cheesy. He’d hold out his hand as Stan gave him his water bottle, glancing at him again before rolling his eyes and taking a sip.

“What? You don’t like it?” Stan would tease, elbowing him as soon as he closed the cap to his water bottle. “It makes sense! I thought it was funny! Broflovski! It starts with a B- and it’s your last name! Get it?” Stan would repeat, his eyes bright with excitement.

“The more you repeat it the less funny it gets.” Kyle would jokingly groan in annoyance, even scooting a little further away from him! For bit purposes! Stan would scoot right after him, the giddy smile still on his face.

“…Can I tell you something?”

“If it’s B for Broflovski again, I’m gonna hit you.” “It’s not! It’s not.” Stan would say, the smile on his face never wavering. Kyle couldn’t help but smile with him, ushering him to continue with what he was going to say.

“I’d take a Broflovski for life over an A on a test any day.”

Maybe it was stupid for Kyle to be as grateful as he was for Stan. He knew he had a bit of a temper when it came to things like this- and he knew he could be a huge handful at times. But, for reason, Stan stuck by him. Maybe he was bored? Maybe he had nothing better to do, no one better to be with?

But when Kyle looked at the pure happiness on Stan’s face, he couldn’t help but feel like that wasn’t the case. It made him happy, knowing that Stan enjoyed his company just as much as he enjoyed his- even when he was being dramatic. They were Super Best Friends through thick or thin, no matter the circumstance. That felt…nice.

“Thanks, Stan…that means a lot.”

[againstpollutions]

you ever see a fandom post that's like so far out of character you think it should be possible to deactivate someone's blog for them

[baltears]

turns out i am indeed capable of having a pretty good evening

[marybatson]

like just a stream of consciousness thought rn but I don’t think I can ever peacefully read fanfiction based on hero comics bc it genuinely bothers me when people do a big cast scene and only get maybe 1 or 2 ppl who are obviously their only faves correct (close to it) in characterization bc they don’t bother to be respectful of the other ppl so just make them caricatures of what they think they’re like bc they’ve never read their comic in their life. genuinely breaks me out of the immersion. no offense if u don’t know anything abt a character except how they’re portrayed in like idk the animated movies and still write them idk what to tell u. maybe just care about the world ur writing for more js..

[euclydya]

man it is night 3 of "curly having nightmares so bad it effects the entire system" im gonna fuck around in minecraft fhdjsjdncn

[inkats]

the best place to take nap ? lecture hall.

[welcometoteyvat]

sigh i just want to look at posts of my daughter.... i dont want to see posts calling for anti hu tao action

[snekdood]

listen, all im sayin is its pretty funny to me when the same person whos all like "my uwu baby!!!" toward a serial killer in some show also apparently lacks empathy when people who've done far less shit just simply exist and they dont want them to

how do you fail to extend empathy to actual humans but its so easy for you to do with this guy that if he was real would be entirely irredeemable in every capacity?

[freakcliff]

iwtv universe dashboard simulator

girlmand reblogged

😶‍🌫️gaysexinthecity Follow

not saying vampires are real but i think Daniel Molloy gets way too much shit . like if i was a pulitzer prize winning journalist in my seventies and some guy called me and was like im a vampire want an interview i wouldn't hesitate either. fuck man sure tell me about being a vampire. i'll believe you

🎆 magical-swiftie

reading Interview with the Vampire rn and Claudia and Madeline are sooo Long Face core

#now that i think of it a lot of tvl's songs fit this book really well #like #'she gave me life I gave her death'??? # that's so them!!!

🏞️ girlblogg1ng

btw if you're still listening to the vampire lestat, unfollow me now. and like, seriously consider why you're giving plays to a guy who appropriates ancient egyptian history for his vampire schtick, it's honestly sickening

#the vampire lestat #tvl #maintagging because people need to see this honestly #.txt

🌄sampire

keep seeing ppl try to cancel tvl for things hes said to his fans or how he talks about ancient egyptian mythology and not that song where he talks about fucking his mother. like im not crazy right he wrote a whole song about how he fucked his mother

💟 stingorarr

"we are your children/but what do you give us/is your silence/a better gift than the truth?" sounds like it should be some ancient Greek poetry but it's literally in a song by the vampire lestat!!!

it just hits so hard... like your parents gave you nothing but maybe the truth would be more unbearable than silence...

#tvl #the vampire lestat #twmbk #those who must be kept

sampire reblogged danielmxllxy

🌫️ beatlesrpf Follow

please tell me you guys arent serious about the vampire lestat. please tell me youre not stanning a man who wrote "im an actor in my makeup, i get fatter when we break up"

#guys please #this is worse than the tortured poets department

🤖 carrieblogging Follow

Based on your likes!

Hey, Tumblr, I need a little help here?

So, my best friend has been acting a little weird lately. Like, his sleep schedule has gotten really strange (stranger than normal 😅), and I haven't seen him without sunglasses on in a week?

His diet has changed, too, like he used to always be snacking whenever I'd call him, but now he doesn't eat anything that I can see.

He even cancelled our tickets to ComicCon!! I've been waiting to meet up with him for years, and now he's just bailed on me?!? I'm mad, but honestly more worried than anything....

#carrie speaks

🌌 marbellina124

guys I think I've found the vampire Armand at the MET 😏😂

#it doesn't match the dates from the book so like #yeah #but imagine.... #parisian mutuals you have a power that can be used

interview-with-the-glampire reblogged wormyworms

🪱 wormyworms Follow

mmm tbh the only reason i *don't* believe vampires are real is because if *i* was interviewing two vampires to write a book about their life? i would not be leaving that house without their fangs in my neck and eternal life. just saying

🌇 interview-with-the-glampire

understandable but have you considered. if I went to interview two vampires and got immortality and vampire sex out of that deal I wouldn't go around letting everyone know :/

danielmxllxy reblogged sampire

🌌 marbellina124

so were all in agreement he fucked that vampire right

#oh I think he fucked AT LEAST two of those vampires #iwtv #rb

[void-dude]

Shapes and Pines AU FAN-MASTERLIST

THAT'S RIGHT FOLKS YOU GUYS GET YOUR OWN LIST BECAUSE YOU'RE DROWNING ME WITH CONTENT!

Canon content -> Masterlist 1

!Fanart?! (I LOVE IT ALL)

Money <3

Crossover time

Taking whats not yours

MARRIED LIFE

obsessed with this guy

Crossover time 2

⚠️ superior shape 🟪

Las Vegas shenanigans

Mornin' hun

Stan the greaser

Eepy sleepy

old man seduction

infected with this freak

Crime Husbands

Peas and Love

crossover 3

I think they are delightful

concept human ted

TAD MOTHER FUCKING STRANGE

He makes me laugh...

Human Tad Strange kinda

Mister Mystery Tonic

Human Tad Plus Euclydian Stan

Notebook doodles

TAD TAD TAD

12 long years and now he's back!

Tiny Tads

HOT TO GO

Square…shape of evil

Smash or pass

Human Tad plus tiny doodles

Human Tad but he's silly

They are resting and snoozing

Despite the scars

OC time?!?

Tad in theraprism?!

Human Tad and the best sweater ever

If you call my name there will be no answer

Let me kiss it better

Mary Poppins

THEY MOVE

Swooning over stan

SHAPES!!

Widdle baby square

Pine rumors

You took away my buddy...

Human Tad he's so fancy

Paper puppet oh my goodness

Boy why are you so

HOT TO GO

Happy and safe

He's sad :(

IT SHOULD'VE BEEN ME!!!

Squares and man

Did this actually happen?

doodles of young Bill and Tad

They're pretty, right?

tad strange but brain rot

They are sleepy

IM FINE

The boys are fighting

Birthday boy

Well that was tragic!

Humanization beam

What a boring white space

He loves him!

Human strange man

The third journal

Trust me

anxious wreck

eepy sleepy

don't look

save me..

I'm not Billy anymore

He kinda funny lookin

Ya wanna keep holding my hand?

Worlds collide

I feel totally normal about this man….

Billy’s caretakers can never catch a break

Human Tad again

Being disgusting on that boat

Is this a Relativity Falls AU?

Silly shapes

*randomly drops Stadley*

HES REAL

Them cooking!

brought "irl Tad" into being CW DRUGS

!FANFIC?!

Baby it's cold outside

Nightmare Tad

Did you forget our anniversary?

A stupid idea

Dipper & Mabel VS The Multiverse

Well… this is a tad strange

Keep your eye clear

Maybe...

And for the rest of the night, his dreams were quiet.

Then get your ass over here, big guy

I got game

[yujisgirl]

NEED more yuji friends istg

dont even know how tumblr works but i have multiple jjk imagines and drabbles written down (w my friends)...

anyway thinking about yuji sb and I have zero yuji stan friends so ill vomit it all over here </33

_________ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐

just wanna say hes the type of guy who would fuck while walking. like if you want water or something he would keep you on his cock and carry you to the kitchen istg he really does have abandonment issues with your cunt

"Yuji, let me drink ffs"

" :(( sorry babe you just feel so good, i don wanna let go"

and if you get tired he'd just hold you up with his own body

he'll b like <3 babe lets try different positions until we find the right one , and its just him fucking you over and over again. it’ll be the same sex position you’d tried just a few mins ago and when you point it out he'd be like :(( sorry i forgot

he definitely has a high sex drive

hes happy? fuck

hes sad? fuck

hes angry? fuck

hes bored? fuck

hes just plain obsessed with your cunt

he would also live in your boobs 24/7

like even if hes just scrolling on his phone his head HAS to be between your boobs

at first i thought his favourite position would be doggy style cus yk ass and all but imo he would also love riding just so he can latch his mouth on your boob the whole time

_________ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐

btw this isnt how i normally write 😭 im too horny to make it all pretty n all but I SWEAR i write longer and more precise stuff than this, im just testing this out

[mikewheeleranti]

hogwarts legacy characters as tropes

includes: sebastian sallow, ominis gaunt, garreth weasley, amit thakkar

a/n: to the sebastian sallow stans, i'm gonna SPARE you. in this, anne is fine and he doesn't get into the dark arts.

sebastian sallow:

found family/friends to lovers

when you came to hogwarts, you came lonely. when you looked around after getting sorted into your house, everyone was sitting with somebody they knew, chatting away. planning to walk out, you're stopped short when a girl with short brown hair leaves her table to comes up to you. "hi, i'm anne! i couldn't help but notice you didn't have somewhere to sit, come by me and my brother, if you want to."

oh pls after that it was history, anne wasn't letting you go

ever since that dinner with anne and her twin, sebastian, in first year you were done for. sebastian's freckles and the way he blushed lightly in embarrassment when his sister would tease him for something made you swoon. ominis and anne taunted you about this endlessly, making you hide your face every time without fail.

anne definitely set you two up

anne told you many times that he did, in fact, like you back but it was hard to believe. he treated you like a normal friend, and those times you caught him staring at you he was just zoning out. so, pushing your feelings aside, you got ready to go to hogsmeade with anne, ominis, and sebastian. it took you and sebastian 15 minutes at honeydukes to realize the other 2 weren't coming. at the end of the day, you had confessed after you spilled butterbeer on his white shirt. "shit, im sorry! merlin, this is embarrassing. spilling a drink on the guy you like.." yea if u think you've seen him red you hadn't until that day.

you alr know those friendsgivings HIT

thanksgiving at hogwarts always made you a bit homesick, that feeling didn't come in 7th year with your "family." coming back to the slytherin common room after dinner, you stayed up all night talking with sebastian, who coincidentally got plastered with anne that night. " 'm gonna marry you one day" as he rested his head on your chest and dozed off, leaving your heart racing.

ominis gaunt:

forbidden romance

ominis' family would not approve of you, that is something he knew for a fact. his family was cold, distant, and in his eyes, evil. when he was younger, he would fantasize about escaping with his aunt, noctua gaunt, and moving somewhere far way. that wasn't possible anymore, but he still had you. you were his safe space, his place of hiding, and you meant everything to him. which is exactly why he had to hide you from anyone who could report your relationship to his family. many people warned you about being so close with a gaunt, but you both knew better.

many late nights sneaking around the castle and secret touches

you and ominis were once again sneaking around the castle, desperately trying to avoid peeves. his wand was leading both of you in the direction of the undercroft, linked arm in arm. when you two had gotten to the spot you made years ago, you would spend hours basking in each others presence. in the late hours of the night, ominis would make up for his lack of vision through sight and memorize everything about you. gentle touches along your face, kisses along your cheeks, forehead, eyelids, even. this man wants nothing more than to absolutely worship you, he thinks of you as his saving grace.

expect fear of his family

to put it lightly, ominis is terrified at the idea of his family ever finding you. he will do anything in his power to protect you. when the new fifth year tells him they need his help with sebastian, you are not coming, and that's final. he doesn't know what dangers may lie there. going back to the undercroft, he promises you many things, promises he will hold to his heart forever. "i will always protect you, my love" with a kiss as light as a feather below your ear. "you are so perfect" with your foreheads leaned against each other, and his hand rubbing your back.

garreth weasley:

good girl x bad boy (even if you aren't a girl)

you were never one to break rules in any way, always trying to keep up with your academics. you weren't at the top of your class, but you were up there and you had good relationships with your professors. which is why it was a little surprising that garreth weasley, the schools infamous "troublemaker" was talking to you right now. it was almost more surprising he knew your name. "y/n, help me out. please." "weasley, i am not stealing a dumb feather for you, please go back to making your wiggenweld potion."

lowkey cringed having to write troublemaker

also a bit of enemies to lovers

you were already annoyed enough that day, and the last thing you needed was weasley dragging you into his antics. though, fate was not on your side when you were walking out of the library and got dragged into a row of bookcases. "what the hell? let go of-" you were quickly cut off when garreth wrapped his hand around your mouth and kept you against a bookcase until you heard an angry professor sharp storm past. now whispering, you ask "what the hell is wrong with you?" just for him to cup the side of your face and kiss your cheek before smirking and walking away. "thank you, darling!"

it's definitely unexpected when you start dating, but not unwelcome.

his rebellious nature started to grow on you, not that you would do some of the stuff that he does around the castle. truth be told, he does find it adorable when you come up to him and proudly told him you skipped one class period. your professors and classmates alike are definitely shocked when they see you two laughing quietly together in the back of the class, but you convince him to study more and the improvement in his grades does not go unnoticed by your professors.

loves embarrassing you in public

he would never push your limits too far, but he loves teasing you in public whenever he can. he was always convinced he wouldn't be into pda, but then he met you. how could he resist from it if you were going to squirm away like that? if you told him you were uncomfortable with this he wouldn't, of course. but if you let him he would have the time of his life very obviously pulling you into an empty room when you were on your way to class.

amit thakkar:

academic rivals

amit frustrated you. you were at the top of your class for a while now, until he got out of second place and replaced you. this grabbed your attention on him, constantly glaring at him in class and in the hallways, which made you fall behind more. what was even more infuriating is that he didn't do anything more than give you a small smile in class. in fact, he admired you and your wit, and your dedication to staying at the number one spot drew him into you.

since he's the sweet man he is, he'd probably lead to your friendship

after you finally got your spot back, you didn't stop studying. there was no way anyone was going to take your spot again. astronomy was almost over, and the rest of the class was given to spend freely while professor shah handed back the most recent test. "good job, y/n." smirking, you looked at the red 98 on the parchment, turning over to amit to ask what he got. "95, what about you?" your smile could have lit the sky in replacement to the stars, he thinks. "98, maybe i should tutor you sometime." when you walk out of the room, he puts the parchment in his bag, glancing at the bold "100" on it.

people were definitely confused when you went from glaring at him to holding his hand

you were joking when you said you would tutor him, but he held your word to it. it was the week before exams and he actually had to help you grasp the fact that aries is not just a straight line. you could've gotten this long ago, but you noticed yourself becoming entranced with him. how was he so patient with you, and so kind? when you finally got the idea, you went into the exam ready. when you got one point higher than him on the exam, he congratulated you with a tight hug, and when you separated, you weren't very separated. leaning in, before your lips connected you said one last thing to him before summer. "don't think i'll go easy on you next year, you better write to me."