#im mcfucking ILL

[the-kipsabian]

THEY ARE GAY YOUR HONOR

[shelf-ships]

selfshipper nation does anyone else have a bunch of f/os that they love so so much but then there’s that one f/o that’s The f/o and every time you fixate on them you lose all your sanity because me too (me literally right now)

[bbboar]

dont want to mcfucking jinx it but it seems very very likely that ill be a cat mother in 2026. And if the rug gets pulled from under me im going to make a huge fuss about it. Im not going to be reasonable for once

[neokatt]

uuhh saw a post on twitter that inspired me (i lost the mcfucking post though i shoulda bookmarked it) and so woe, Hope fused with the pandora box (+gems) at ye

im sleep deprived as hell so ill probably hate this when i wake up but for rn im so proud of this like wowie zoiwie

[urlocallesbiab]

TELL ME ABOUT ASSISFRIEDKIN!!! I assume it’s friedkin and lt assistent?

yeag themst! i was promising myself i would someday make a Proper post (and even kept a similar ask as a reminder for myself, sorry i never got back to you tumblr user dykebarbie, i SEE U and APPRECIATE YOU), but i just never have enough energy/motivation for that (maybe i should've changed my blog name lmao, but also i love assisfriedkin :3), SO. instead.

i'll hand you this mcfucking google doc that was meant to be a collection of resources for me to make a post from. tysm for asking, genuinely, and have fun!

also if im bothered enough times there's a chance ill finish the outline for that au where friedkin is replaced with an alternative friedkin from a timeline where he wasn't a bad guy (i call that alt!hugo au), and that makes both him and mike have soooo many kinds of existential crises <3

oh also both kp (@generalized-incompetence) and phoebe (@clockworkcheetah) have assisfriedkin headcanons — guys, would you mind sharing, or adding screenshots/links of old stuff?

also kp i beg of you to link that library fic of yours, i love it so so much :3 :3 :3 my fac thingie, my comfort read!!

[star-vibing-prompts]

Random shit I had or others had said as prompts.

Warnings: Swearing, Mentions of sus, dark humor(probably), dark themes(also probably), Sensitive topics

----------------------------

"Motherfucker is high on cat nip at the top."

"Imma just kick this fish then-"

"Let me sleep with you!"

"STOP CREAMING YOURSELF"

"Let me throw your child!"

"I smacked a bad guy's booty."

"That was a good ass slap!"

"Give me all these delicious batteries!"

"Everybody died in this family!"

"I JUST SHOT HER BODY WITH MY GUN-"

"I DIDNT EVEN KNOW I HAD BALLS STILL!"

"I got stuff on my neck!"

"Be honest, am I hot?" "I'M GAY-"

"IMMA WHIP OUT MY BEANS ESSAY"

"Not the duckussy"

"Already sus gonna hide in the ooc"

"Okay I got my happiness, bye"

"I like me some Among Us"

"Can someone hold me please"

"[Name] stop searching. I wanna search something up to on him!"

"IS HE WRITING A FANFIC OML"

"I KNOW BUT WHEN I LAUGH I SOMEHOW CHOKE ACK-"

"You're more grosser than I am."

"Ohh~ Hee got the rizz~"

"OKAY BACK TO CRYING"

"I love dying screaming"

"IM CRYING WHAT DID WE JUST WALK IN ON???"

"I will slap myself if I say something sus"

"Let her scream lmao."

"Being force to talk by a 14 year old"

"Such a beautiful break up"

"STOP RIZZING ME"

"Anyway does anyone want to get slap by me?"

"Damn she hot"

"THE FUCK WOMAN???"

"DAMN I AM A LONELY BITCH"

"Actually *SHITTING* himself would be pooping. *PISSING* himself would be peeing."

"Why did you eat mah stick?"

"STOP EATING POOP???? WHOS POOP EVEN IS THAT???"

"I- Wha- ho- ...MY BRAIN CANT HANDLE THISI-"

"I think u just pissed him up even more"

"And why are you creaming [Name]?" "Damn tell me how you really feel about the cream jesus"

"One of them is: What the fuck is going on at this point and why am I still here for it?"

"I just love killing people!"

"I want to fuck Optimus Prime."

"Allergies are kicking me ass"

"I would've given you some but you didn't talk fast enough /j"

"[NAME] PLEASE I BE SILLY"

"I SWEAR ON [NAME] IT AINT ME"

"Why is [Name] robbing [Name2]"

"Enjoy your last peaceful moments"

"You were the chosen one"

"Then speak it"

"And [Name] just set himself on fire"

"I feel like I am being judged now,,,,,bye." *disappears*

"The shame has already been done there is no going back"

"My mom used to buy me robux before she mcfucking died"

"I BROKE MY STICK"

"THEY DONT KNOW WHAT GOES ON BEHIND CLOSED DOORS"

"My gaydar told me"

"What the fuck are smiley fries."

"Rice with beef broth because we have no chicken"

"Anime cat girls are canon within Spongebob now."

"The Cat Has Ingested The Wall"

"Split dat chicken wingg"

"Oeuur... digs chicken wing out of the carpet"

SHRIEKS AND BREAKS IN THROUGH A WINDOW

"They have been bestowed the name [New name]"

"I love the fumbling with the remote"

"Literally vibrating in my chair, I’m really excited for the game"

"That's so sad imagine someone hated you so much they wouldn't even spend more than 5 bucks to hire a hitman"

"Bro's gonna be willing to die after that"

"FLOOFY AND GOOBER"

"I wanna invite them for tea and crumpets

The best type of relationship"

"ILL FORFEIT ALL MY LEGAL POSSESSIONS TO HIM"

"Like damn dude you don't need THAT much eye liner"

"This is so emo"

"My dude needs to look fabulous"

"WHAT A GOOBER ! FOOLISH LITTLE FELLOW"

"OMG ITS MY KID"

"LIL GUY IS SPEEDY ASF"

"They got a little too silly"

"ITTY BITTY"

"They just need to put some ice on it"

"Aww noo they spilled the cranberry juice" :(

[leafiion]

i hate it here. talon did we not tell you we have JOBS i dont have time for this

YOU POISONED REN!!!!! gym puzzle my ASS WE ARE BUSYYYY... fucking fine whatever. okay his design is kind of cute. get fucked my noivern is better than your noivern. swapped into sylveon and spammed calm mind PLUS my domain shift shifted us to the fairy forest area so he just swept

literally when. none of my pokemon fainted. anyway im glad talon didnt mcfucking Die but whatev

um. no. bye

KANONNN :D MY FRIEND. help hes psyching himself up to order pizza kanon u r my friend

nice to me.... uaghhghg...

aevis wants to go movie direct.. me too buddy. okay anyway im going to go say merry christmas to zetta

okay never mind ill just go fuck myself then. fine. whatever. i dont even care!!

THEYRE GETTING MARRIED?

oh okay jeez. dont scare me.

oh thats fine. chase your happiness... go get fridged...

i love him actually. how long did it take him? /gen. oh reina's getting fridged too lol. AND NOW IM BACK IN HEAVEN STOP PUTTING ME IN ZEIGHT GET ME OUTTA HERE!! MELIA YOU CANT KEEP SUMMONING ME WILLYNILLY I NEED SOME TIME TO BE MY SWAG SELF??

fucking why

m2 is gonna fucking get youuuu . oh and breakup time i forgot why they were breaking up but honestly i support it i think melia does have too much going on.

WHY ARE WE HAVING A FUCKING VACATION. mmn :( no ana.. sad. amber :]

oh yeah right. hey when do we get to see deagan

nvm i dont want to see him. mean to keta he already died TWICE.. oh shit we're having the reincarnation talk at the table. and its done as soon as it started. hey why does tesla have a vending machine in her house

aelita is back on her being so cutes grind..

yeah no shit

why... so we could get stuck in another world forever...? also LMAOOO sooo lame... ren..

dont meta at me.

PATTY DID YOU JSUT TRY TO FUCKING KILL US?

hes dyingk...

HE IS SO ANGRYYYY HELP ME

we are not having fun.. ren gets back to his human body for five minutes and is instantly poisoned.

[the-kipsabian]

i never posted this apparently so im forcing you to look at him now 💜

[comfortyart]

I cant believe my husband just interrupted my very serious conversation about a gender slider pin to tell me I need a "Thirsty for Roy" slider.

[ajdrawshq]

i was listening to some of the nameless user/x0o0x_'s music on yt while looking thru the comments that explain some of the stories their songs reference and. so. like. is the "ghost train" in twilight town based off of the kisaragi station

[xueyangmybeloved]

I'm shy but I messaged the artist and now I can finally own a print of this photo as a tg//cf redraw

[minijenn]

Me @ Re:Mind rn:

[fearfollow]

okay im gonna try and make today the day i actually clean up my drafts and figure out my shit on here!!! wish me luck dffgbjkwrb

[gingerwerk]

me staring at the 1300 words i managed to pull out for this sidefic knowing full well i’ll desperately Need to shove it away and not look at it for at least another week because of gradschool needs 

[dameronalone]

.

[elizabeth-mitchells]

pretty much in the mood to go all movie-like and go to the middle of nowhere and scream for a while... but im shy