#im fucking unhinged today
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Actually me thinks im not gonna be funny and tag someone in this because it gets all fucky but Sombra is really fun and clingy and ataches to like the first 5 people that show him basic human affection because up until Siddy found him in that snow shack he'd been living in fight or flight for a majority of his conscious existance and he keeps wrapping around them all clingy n attached because he is absolutely terrified that if he looks away they will fucking dissapear and never come back. so like by the time he gets yeeted into the wall by Donny because he keeps scenting everything and is unaware he's essentially initiated a war because don't scent another aredrul's things if you like living he just takes it. He doesn't register that he's done something bad until someone explains it to him later but he doesn't like, fght back or claw or anything he just takes the beating because he's learned if he rolls over and just takes it it'll end eventualy, he won't get thrown away and he won't be forcibly made docile.
he didn't learn that from the best place but in his mind this is just normal behavior, and somewhere along the line he just thought this was how you go initiated into a psuedo family dynamic. But by the time like, CE's boyfriends start fiighting del for the right to date him, Sombra's gotten used tto being around the castle by himself, if he spots family shaped objects he will cling onto them for the next couple of hours but he does not go into the aboslute panic mode he used to which is really sweet because he's registered he's really safe in the UW castle and that nothing can get to him and hey he's starting to experience genuine love and care that did not make him in debt to trafficers this is great.
he very much loves his family. @sage2mage2 vacate my blog after this post idk how the nsfw tags work here yet
#funny cat child is funny#he's a little silly#he gets very fucked up though#also tfw what was supposed to be a defense mechanism just becomes you and you cease to exist as a concept or a person#you die but it's better you die with the memory of what happened and let yourself live iin relatively peaceful and ignorant bliss#sucks for what you leave behind though#something something the mind forgets the body remembers#anyway#cat#oc#ocrambles#mumbles#latenightthroughts#im fucking unhinged today#i love tumblr#it's like a void that has o choice but to listen while i ramble on and on and on and on and on and on and on adn on and-
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it's really tragic how Eddie doesn't get that Buck would take literally everything he has to give and more if he just ASKED. if he just LET HIM. and on some level I think Buck must be aware of this. like even if he's never put it into words he can always feel it. even if he doesn't yet understand that what he's been feeling this whole time is love. there's nothing Eddie could give that Buck wouldn't take. I'm unwell.
#like Eddie#my guy#you are not too much for Buck and you never could be#everything you have to offer including all your fucked up baggage#he wants to carry it with you#and he has#and he will#you just need to accept it#sorry for being unhinged im just really emo about them today#mine#eddie diaz#evan buckley#911 abc#911#buddie
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"DON'T CLOSE YOUR EYES, DARLING"
POV, you're getting your everything pulled out on the forest floor. Bonus detail shots:
ᴬˡˢᵒ ᵖˡᵉᵃˢᵉ ᵇᵉʰᵃᵛᵉ ᶦⁿ ᵗʰᵉ ᵗᵃᵍˢ, ᵗʰᵃⁿᵏ ʸᵒᵘᵎ
#windyart#adriel#gore#blood#body horror#WOO YEAHH BABEYYYY#painting#technically this is painted ?? some of it#the hollowridge disaster#I LITERALLY SPENT ALL DAY ON THIS TODAY i was gonna draw other stuff and just work on this for a lil. i wasnt even gonna render it initiall#and then i was like fucking ayo i think ill put obscene effort into this. for him (adri my beloved)#idk what else to say im just nsane and ive been so so so excited to finish this and it looks so good i think im rly proud!!!#i hope yall like it -w-#guy who is so unhinged fr..........
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brocal for the ship bingo?
The OTP to end all other OTPs... (Man. This wound up being basically Cori's Masterpost of BroCal. AKA... this got long and has some images, since I realized I can post my own art directly instead of just a text link to it lol.)
Wasn't actually expecting this to wind up with a bingo? But I got basically 2?? (Will explain the lighter heart later.) This is A LONG post, and definitely gonna get SUGGESTIVE, bc man, am I obSESSED with BroCal. I'm just gonna go thru each checked box, since I don't know how else to structure this post lol.
Read More to save ppl's dashboards:
I want them to make out with blood: OKAY. I HAVE A WHOLE THING PLANNED FOR THIS CONCEPT. I AM NOT GOING TO GO INTO DETAIL ABOUT IT JUST YET BC I ACTUALLY WANNA WRITE IT. I'm obsessed with this one fanart of Bro licking Lil Cal, and it spurred on an idea I outlined and really wanna write: https://coridallasmultipass.tumblr.com/post/739969858334294016/hiiii-mutual-i-am-secrecy-asking-if-u-have-anymore
((Sorry for the plain text links, Tumblr app is NOT cooperating with me right now to add hyperlinks. I'd post the image directly if that one was mine.))
Basically, I just really need to see Bro and Cal making out with blood in their mouths, and I started a whole convoluted, unrelated outline in order to make that hapen. It'll probably just be a really short thing that ends at the uh climax, since otherwise it's gonna end up sadstuck. And I don't like sadstuck lol.
Undeniably t4t: Bro and Dirk are always trans for me, and Lil Cal's got that uh... what percentage did I calculate it out to be? 13% of Dirk is in Lil Cal [ My shitpost calculations: https://coridallasmultipass.tumblr.com/post/746702663327072256/i-ran-out-of-tags-rambling-about-this-so-im-just ] so Lil Cal is at least 13% trans because of that much of Dirk being in him, plus however you feel about the other components being trans. LMAO this is ridiculous to type out. Moving on.
EDIT: FUTURE CORI INTERJECTING WITH A:
"Lil Cal Top Surgery Healing Progess: Day 1"
Terrible for each other affectionate/derogatory: I don't even know where the affectionate/derogatory split occurs. I multiship BroCal as both Bro/normal puppet Lil Cal and as Bro/evil juju puppet Lil Cal, and whatever combination in between or outside of that. Terrible in that Bro is so obsessed with Cal that he doesn't have normal relationship/social skills and uses Lil Cal as both a crutch and motivator alternately, in a terrible cycle, or maybe rather... spiral. And also terrible in that Bro is caught in the allure of playing the role of puppeteer while also being a puppet for the darker parts of Lil Cal, whether he actively knows it or not. (Honestly though, I feel like it's dismissive if you try to blame all of Bro's faults on Lil Cal like this tho, which is why I tend towards liking Lil Cal as just a regular puppet a lil bit more. Or at least, a regular mildly supernatural puppet since that can be a little more entertaining if Cal can get into mischief while no one's looking or give off the vibes of his mood more directly, rather than like entirely inanimate or 'just LE, trapped in a puppet body.' Again, I like all of these concepts.) ((I mean that can also be a whole post of its own, like, by the time Bro gets ahold of Lil Cal, are any of the other components still alive in there? Like, are ARquius and Gamzee still in there or did Caliborn kill and consume them entirely? Idk how it works, man. This is why I like Lil Cal as his own person, maybe just influenced by the feelings of the others. LaCroix: CalGamARquius essenced water. Lil Croix.))
They need to get weirder with it: YES YES. 1000% YES. I need entirely shameless Bro doing entirely shamless things to Lil Cal. I want them inseparable and doing unspeakable things to each other. I want Bro taking full advantage of Cal having a puppet body and all the intimacy that comes with making repairs and being elbow-deep in stuffing.
Playing with them like dolls cute/psychological torture: This is the same divide as with the 'terrible for each other' point, so I'm just gonna go with the cute one, since the torture one is self-explanatory. I want them fucking married. Like. Full mushy cute romance type of relationship that Bro has never felt for any of the people in his life (cough aromantic cough). I made this comic not too long ago, and I often fondly look back on it, because I adore the concept of Bro being lovey and romantic and everything out of character around Lil Cal because he feels safe and loved and comfortable around Cal:
[ https://coridallasmultipass.tumblr.com/post/750602227910131712/brocal-4-lyfe-so-i-had-this-idea-of-dave-being ]
I made a post a long, long time ago (not gonna link that one bc it was personal and I was being very obviously mentally ill ["C'mon, like you're not being obviously mentally ill while typing paragraph upon paragraph about BroCal still in 2024 like 10 years later??" Fair.]) But the gist of it was that, like, having objectophilia or objectum sexuality is like, from an outsider pov, it's a way to express love to yourself. You filter all your self-hate through the object you love, and you get back unconditional love in return.
Lil Cal is never gonna hate Bro, no matter what Bro does. As a regular puppet, Lil Cal doesn't have the capacity for hate. And so that only brings them closer, since Cal is never gonna reject Bro for any reason. (Back to being a crutch. RSD is real, and Dave is probably a big trigger for that since he's not on the same wavelength of weird as Bro [not blaming Dave, obviously, this is a post about BroCal].) Bro can experience receiving positive attention from Lil Cal, without feeling 'fake' or uncool by expressing that same attention or affection directly to his own self. (Things are always done through multiple layers with the Striders, aren't they?) ((And I'm not saying Lil Cal doesn't love Bro, or that their relationship is just pretend - it's real, I'm just like, 'What's going on behind the curtain in the mundane situation?/ How is the relationship appealing?' Lil Cal luvs Bro 5eva 4 lyfe and that's a hard fact. Could cut diamonds with that shit.)) Example: maybe Bro is dealing with a bout of body/gender dysphoria and is trying to take out his frustration with working out, and it's not helping, even if he's powered through a set better than normal. Then, he notices the way Lil Cal is watching him, and he can feel the excitement seeping off Cal. He can sense the echoes of a wolf-whistle ring out through his mind, and it's like. Okay, none of that shit from before matters, he's got all the validation he needs right there in Lil Cal. Maybe flex in Cal's direction, Bro?
Oh, so back to being cute: isn't it wonderful how the template maker phrased it as 'playing dolls'? But yeah, I want all the mush and everything. Bro has a whole wardrobe for Lil Cal for every minor event that occurs in the Strider household. I want them going on genuine dates. Maybe even... holding hands. Bro blushes for the first time since he was 16. He even gets to take Lil Cal with him when he goes out to DJ or put on a show. Not to mention the whole website business. (I've talked about Cal's role in that before, but I'll mention it in a moment...)
They will die in a heart shaped pool of blood: I mean, kinda did happen, even tho Lil Cal didn't perma die right there. I don't think this one needs any explanation, since it basically happens in canon.
'You should see the other guy...': Okay, so. About 11 years ago, I had a really great idea. About how smuppets enter this world. I expanded on it in the following more-recent post (adult only content lol): https://coridallasmultipass.tumblr.com/post/741683686717669376/back-in-the-day-my-friends-called-me-insane-when-i
To sum it up, whenever Bro makes a new smuppet design, he then gives it a video debut on his website, where uh, Lil Cal births the smuppet like it's a horror movie scene, fake blood and poly-fil gore all over the place as the smuppet crawls out from the viscera. Bro then gets to play aftercare by lovingly and gently cleaning up and restuffing Lil Cal as they get to admire their new creation and rake in the dough lol.
So it's technically not a 'you should see the other guy' kinda situation, but it does involve one of them being... idk what word would describe it. Injured by the other? Usually a character loses a fight and says this to act like they got out of it better than the other guy, but... We could have someone knock on the door during the filming of a scene like that, and Bro has to answer it with fake blood up to his elbows, and be like 'You should see the other guy.' (But obviously, that's a terrible idea and would cause more trouble than it's worth... Maybe worth it for a persistent door to door salesperson, though.)
Though, I guess I should also say, I'm not opposed to Bro beating on Lil Cal in or out of the bedroom. Or in the case of animate Lil Cal, Cal choking out Bro. In or out of the bedroom, lol. Depends on the situation, like I said I will ship this ship any which way. But my preference for animate Lil Cal is to be like a totally normal puppet around Bro (or mushy in-love with Bro) and then evil-murder-puppet towards anyone else in Bro's life, like a... toxic yaoi guard puppet. (New Phrase Achievement Unlocked!) Bro brings home another guy to have sex, who tries to stay the night due to the late hour, but the guy wakes up shortly after to see Lil Cal standing there with a knife in the dark, eyes glowing red. Panic ensues when the guest screams and freaks out, and by the time Bro's got a light on, grabbing his sword, ready for a ninja vs ninja fight (bc an intruder would've had to bypass all the traps), Lil Cal is just innocently splayed across the desk chair, no knife in sight. Relevant post (well, the caption on the post too, saying how Bro can't seem to hold onto any relationships besides Lil Cal):
[ https://coridallasmultipass.tumblr.com/post/741830516962164736/i-want-you-so-youre-mine-always-selfishly ]
Uh, lol, also Cal choking out Bro in the bedroom, adult only drawing: https://coridallasmultipass.tumblr.com/post/754328907438800896/i-wouldnt-wanna-be-my-ex-when-he-found-out-who
Thinking about them always and forever: Listen. My Tumblr as proof, I've had BroCal on the brain for at least 11 years at this point. Definitely longer, since I first started reading Homestuck. I fucking love puppets and dolls and plushies and I always have. Man, if I hadn't deleted Tweets (automated app I used to do, and I couldn't choose what to save) from when I was in high school, you could've seen me @ ing my fave band when they were taking lyric suggestions on a fan-inspired album, where I was telling them 'make a song where the theme is puppets' and, while I don't know if they saw that or took the suggestion (they had responded to me before bc they weren't huge yet), there is indeed a song titled "Puppets" on that album, and it was my favourite song on there. Point is, I was fated to ship BroCal before I even knew it existed.
Sicko 2 sicko communication: I mean, does this even need explaining? Bro and Cal aren't just on the same wavelength of freaky, they're the fucking source of the wavelength, and it's causing a feedback loop between them. And it does as feedback does, which is, it amplifies with time. (Going back to the spiral symbolism here, lol.) ((Actually, time can play a symbol here, too, I guess, but idk how to word it, I'm starting to run out of steam.))
Let them have a happy ending: God, I need this so badly. I know Bro's story ends in Homestuck, but like. Pls. Someone needs to officiate their wedding. Currently placing the dreambubble order, but I can't organize a wedding by myself. OH speaking of. In that lil comic I did above, where Bro is accepting Lil Cal's proposal, I had the Natural Born Killers wedding scene in mind. I was gonna draw that as a follow up, but I think I have too many WIPs going. Just two people on the run, saying "I do" in a scenic but completely ordinary roadside location. Idk why, I keep going back to that movie for things related to Bro (I mention it in a very important scene in a longer WIP I've been writing, as something Bro watched and internalized as a kid lol.) It's not the best movie lol. Anyway.
The devotion omg: I feel like I have already gotten my point across about this, but let me reiterate:
[ https://coridallasmultipass.tumblr.com/post/735842968450269184/in-the-name-of-iconic-magical-girl-anime-ill ]
Bro and Lil Cal absolutely beat the shit outta Jack Noir before he gets prototyped. And even then, they fight together till the death, like. C'mon. Nothing more romantic than fighting a losing battle side by side. Also, like, Lil Cal having his own protective chest for safekeeping as seen in the Strider living room? Like, you don't just have a protective case for any old thing, especially something meant to be handled, especially something that is regularly used to smack other things/humans. What I'm saying is, Lil Cal is durable and resilient, and yet, Bro still has a case for transporting Cal safely. Oh, wait, I just thought of something funny, what if Lil Cal goes feral like a cat, and basically the chest is like a cat carrier so Bro can drive without being constricted lmaoooo, I've been typing for hours can you tell?
Kind of homophobic: Listen. I HAD a Cal. Took him to college. Staked my claim on the top bunk bc I am royalty. Proceeded to not have anywhere to set my water cup and had to use a cardboard box as a table up there. Spilled water. Melted Cal's sharpie-drawn face. And then proceeded to cry. I have a WIP of Lil Cal 2, but that requires actually remembering to work on him. I wanna do better by the pattern, too, since I rushed to finish the first. I have all the material! I have the project started! So it's just a matter of reordering my WIP priorities, honestly.
Where is all the fucking content?!: For realzz. I was actually venting about this the other day (didn't end up posting it), but it's like, either there's no BroCal content, or there IS BroCal content, but I can't reblog it for reasons I don't want to get into on this post. I'm dying of thirst in the ocean, basically. Whatever. This just means I need to make more BroCal content myself, which I am more than happy to do. I've just had a rough past few months, so I'm glad I got to type all this post out, and hopefully I can get back to creating soon.
Last one! I hope this one makes up for the absurd length of the post, it's prob my new fave idea I just came up with on the spot.
[TW drink spiking by a stranger mentioned in this.]
Committing atrocities as their silly little activities: I think we all know what this means, but I am going to ignore that elephant with my special x-ray vision. Because this is a BroCal post. I'm digging deep to the meat and bones of this. Honestly, this could go multiple routes, it depends on how you take your Lil Cal.
One could place emphasis on the 'guard' part of the, ahem ahem, toxic yaoi guard puppet. Maybe someone is actually trying to harm Bro, and Bro legit can't do anything for reasons outside of his control - let's say his drink got spiked a while after he invited a stranger home that he thought was chill. As Bro gets shoved down on the futon, his memory of the night is only a few flickers. Familiar orange plush, roiling around above him like a dancing windsock. Flashes of Lil Cal's face all distorted and stretched wide like a funhouse. J-Lo and Ice Cube on the TV. But when Bro is finally able to fully wake up in the morning, everything is as if he just got home alone last night and passed out on the futon. Cal looks totally normal and content tucked under Bro's warm arm. Except when Bro gets up, there is a pair of shoes too big to belong to him at the door. Maybe Bro knows. Maybe instinct tells him to run. Maybe he does, but he's running towards Lil Cal, every time.
#apologies for being entirely unhinged about brocal. this isnt even the half of it#the-meat-machine#asked#praying my internet posts this in one go in the correct format. rip to everyones dashboard if it doesnt#im not turning on my pc to correct it if i cant fix an upload error from mobile#homestuck#brocal#otp5eva#stridercest#long post#Cori.exe#Post.exe#im like staring at my phone scared to hit the post button bc if tumblr has a fit then idk what ill do#and its like okay i could just put my phone down and go to sleep.#but what if tumblr decides to post it AFTER IM ASLEEP AND CLOGS EVERYONE WHOS FOLLOWING ME'S DASH#if that readmore doesnt save where its supposed to... (has happened before)... i am genuinely so fucking sorry.#oh oKAY WAIT compromise. ill save it as a draft first so the bulk of the upload happens privately in case something goes wrong#bc knowing my internet and how i was fighting hyperlinks last night and today that still wont work. something is gonna go wrong#fingers crossed the draft saves tho i dont wanna copy all this shit from the 'in case of emergency' screenshots i took lol#anyway i really need to get ready for bed fuck lol literally took me hours to type this and its not even polished ughh#toxic yaoi guard puppet#omg tho 'lil cal top surgery' idea had me dying when i remembered theres canon cal sewn up like that#i gotta remember to post that separately tmr#i got this post draftes and gna post now. im seeby#oh wait#puppets#suggestive#striders#man if i wish i started w the last point but i dont have the energy to reorder everything#nini im going seep 4r this time
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silly guys that make me lose followers on tumblr dot com
#my art lol#vocaloid#zhiyu moke#persona 3#ryoji mochizuki#omfg lmao i normally dont do this kind of thing ever... but the circumstances are so fucking funny i HAD to#no cause its so amusing to me. so u can put up w/ my unhinged ramblings in the tags a bunch of dumb uninteresting shit etc#but seeing the same fuckass gif too many times in a row is the final straw?? ok sure#LIKE IM NOT REALLY MAD OR ANYTHING its just hilarious to me that THAT is some (2) people's final straws w me. thats their limit#i only reserve spam reblogging the same post in a row for very special occasions when im extremelyyyyyy unwell abt smthn (pos or neg)#so its really funny to me that on two separate occasions that was enough for two separate people to unfollow my main. LOL#couldnt handle the mokening/ryojiing 😔🙏 tragic! anyways.#NO BUT ALSO i once did reblog. the same video of shadow the hedgehog like 50+ times in a row#i dont remember if i lost anyone because of that though??? if i didnt then THATS HILARIOUS LOL everyone just loves shadow#but some fuckin chinese computer program and death the teenage boy??? i want those twinks obliterated. blocked and unfollowed.#my lessons ive learned: i can weaponize random ass gifs of random ass anime boys i guess?????????#also this is from today. and serves as a good precursor to whats abt to happen which happened far from today 🥴😭😔😔😔
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a Kidd for @guilty-sugar (special thank you to @mandiemegatron who's tip let me get the brush sets I've been testing out- this one is sooo good. love love love you both <<<333)
#I did his scars on memory don't hate me if they're wrong#more art coming im teaching my husband how to play story of seasons lollll#eustass kid#captain kid#kid one piece#kid x reader#kid pirates#for my wives <<33#DIDNT EXPECT HIM DID YA#I HATE DRAWING MECH SORRY I DIDNT DRAW THE ARM LOL#CAN YOU GUESS WHOS NEXT#smooch smooch smooch#I redid that hand 9x it is what it is I hope its okay#lol#sorry I have no consistent style im figuring it out ok#unhinged scribbles#bartos burlesque hours#featuring kidd#nope not fixing the spelling in the tags fuck you autocorrect im not doin it today lol
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Person who has not watched naruto: So why is naruto the main character? He seems lame compared to other characters
Me: sir. SIR. That is my beautiful sunshine child, who I adore. HOW DARE U??? Naruto will heal the ninja world thru love and empathy and he will not stop no matter what 😭
#he called me a naruto stan. im not a stan. that implies i dont hate everything abt naruto which i do but i also love it#whatever. hes also called me a jerma stan before and that did fucking fatal damage to my psyche#naruto is the best naruto character. u cant change my mind. iruka is also the best naruto character#naruto is just a baby to me. i love him so#fucking. my lab mate was indulging me with asking naruto questions today. stuff sounds so unhinged when u just describe it#like theres so much weird eyeball and alien stuff#naruto ramblings#unrelated#ugh i kinda hate when ppl irl ask me to talk abt things im unhinged abt. its embarrassing bc i kno im over enthusiastic and fixate too much#and they dont care as much as i do
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pissy cook & pissing hitch ig
#ic unhinged hitch moment truly. & ic cook yappening about fuck all as always.#possibly all ive got in me today im nursing another 6+ hr headache we'll see what happens- (': its raining tho so im#just chilling & enjoying the weather waiting for meds to kick in soon. kisses to the sky love ya'll have a good day / night <3#[ 𝘳𝘦𝘯𝘦𝘦. ] ── * the yappening.
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Uh Oh! You ignored an invisible, unspoken social cue that you were supposed to psychically detect without being asked, and now the allistics are cursing you out!: The Movie: The Sequel: The Series: The-
#god im so tired#autism#neurodivergent#neurodiversity#today's saga: I walked down the sidewalk#that's it that's my crime#there were three people in front of me taking up the whole fucking thing and moving slowly#so I pulled out my phone and pretended to be on it since allistics piss themselves if you look at them for too long#then the people camped out directly in front of my apartment entrance and had a slow conversation#so I quietly moved around them and headed for the back door#at which point one of them yelled 'fuck you' at me#why? I don't fucking know#allistics are always one social cue away from a meltdown and yet we're the sensitive ones#smh#they were talking TO EACH OTHER about going into the apartment and hanging out#they did not look at me once#but maybe#even though they'd made an effort to block me off for the entire fucking walk to my apartment#and had vehemently avoided acknowledging my presence#and didn't even look at me when they fucking said that#maybe they were expecting ME to ?? push through them ?? and open the door for them??#i dont fucking know - allistics are unhinged
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it became midnight (an hr and a half ago) and i instantly made my status this
#we have this today. first song of the new shaperaverse era tomorrow. new kaf episode in the next like two weeks. im winning autism#also seeing my friends react to the new dndads on tuesday. i need to know what happens when redacted shows up#unhinged about it truly im so fucking hype for it like oh my goooooood#hlvrai
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happy birthday awg enjoy playing a show to the rowdy folks at the Newburgh Brewing Company
#like i said earlier today. the vibe as of late is incredibly Alex And The Gaskarths#which is whatever#but why the fuck is he playing a free show on his birthday lol ???#bizarre#also the ui on this website is fucking terrible#this is unhinged because it’s been over ELEVEN YEARS. but poughkeepsie just reminds me of tay jardine im very sorry about it#forever speaking my taylex truth
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The Duolingo owl tries to convince you that your ranking and league matter. They don’t. Duolingo is about beating the owl by keeping ridiculously long streaks even if you have to take classes half asleep before bed. If the Duolingo owl was real they wouldn’t be the one with a gun. Sure, it reminds me to take the lessons, but it also tells me I didn’t take a lesson if I make one too many mistakes. No. I took the lesson. The owl is lucky it’s in my phone and not my room
#emma posts#slightly unhinged attitude about the whole ‘hearts’ thing#plenty of asks try to get my attention. but that one doesn’t count me if I make too many mistakes.#I TOOK THE FUCKING LESSON YOU ASSHOLE!#I mean. I haven’t taken mine today yet and I’ve been doing well. but that just makes me MORE angry about it#AND IM NOT PAYING! my cousin offered to let me join the family plan and it didn’t work anyway#I don’t actually understand the whole ‘ominous Duolingo owl’ meme#I just feel seething rage when it tells me I made too many mistakes#fuck you. I’m using my English to Norwegian dictionary to cheat on spelling if i only have one heart#I’m like when my childhood dog got teased by blue jays and they had to stay way up high to avoid his tiny ass#he was short but could jump surprisingly well#I think he did about six feet vertically once#yet the blue jays kept stealing his food when he wasn’t looking
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i am being so brave
#not going to fight someone for not knowing about phalloplasty even tho i want to 😭#i will BEHAVE#tater talks#i need to sleep but also i have to travel so today is just going to be me unhinged sorry#BUT SERIOUSLY WHY DO PEOPLE NOT KNOW ABOUT PHALLOPLASTY#on the trans website u would think thered be more about it but no i have to go to FUCKING reddit#someone put me to BED#im not mad btw im just dramatic
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do you ever want to gently take someone’s face in your hands and tell them to write a fanfic instead of trying to railroad their partners into writing in a collaborative hobby the way they want it written?
#i wanna put my hands on some shoulders like 'are you having fun don't fucking lie to me'#THIS ISN'T ABOUT ANYONE HERE DW IT'S JUST. SOME RULES I HAVE SEEN OVER THE YEARS. SOME PEOPLE REALLY JUST WANT PEOPLE TO ACT OUT THEIR FIC.#ME AND A FRIEND ARE REMINISCING ABOUT WEIRD EXPERIENCES AND IM LIKE GOD PEOPLE STILL DO THIS TODAY EVEN.#i've literally told people a plot they actively dragged my muse into would not work and got cursed out for it.#i was told they would 'write what interests them' which meant railroading my muse and then ignoring me from then on.#THIS WASN'T WHEN I WAS A TEENAGER EVEN? THIS WAS WHEN I WAS ALREADY IN MY TWENTIES.#THOSE INVOLVED WERE OLDER THAN ME AND HAVING TANTRUMS OR CALLING ME SLURS FOR NOT AGREEING TO THEIR CHARACTERIZATION OF MY CHARACTER?#AND NO NOT EVERYONE WHO DOES THIS IS QUITE THAT UNHINGED I ADMIT.#BUT IT JUST SEEMS LIKE SOME PEOPLE WANNA BE SO IN CONTROL OF THEIR CHARACTER AND NARRATIVE IM LIKE. THIS IS A PUBLIC FORUM.#PLEASE DO YOUR THING SOMEWHERE YOU AREN'T GOING TO STEP ON YOUR PARTNERS OR ACT LIKE THEY'RE JUST HERE TO DO WHAT YOU WANT.#vent //
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sports are crazy bc how do i still feel unhinged at 8:30 in the morning
#the RESULTS today im.#holy shit#devastated for marta but lets fucking go#wc23#for some reason feeling unhinged about sports earlier in the morning feels less weird than like. the respectable human time of 8:30
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Brain is rotating between depressing but bittersweet post-trimax one-shot, current wip chapter of itnl, playful horny Sentido sequel one-shot, and violent bloody itnl times to be had sooner than you think
Like the barrel of a gun. Click click click click spinning round and round. Which one am I gonna land on? Only time will tell.
#speculation nation#itnl shit#i did start writing chapter 14 today. finally.#like barely but it's a start.#but ive also been thinking about the post-trimax oneshot i wrote the intro for a month ago & havent written any since#but ALSO im thinking about smut. which i plan to write itnl side stories when that shit comes up#but it's gonna Be A While & i could theoretically do the sentido sequel oneshot WHENEVER i want#ive been waiting for ww to officially be in itnl so hes alive again. b4 i go back to sentido.#but i still have a while and i wanna write smut NOW!!!!!!!!#these 2 make me wanna start Chewing i swear#i also started thinking about blood. specifically vash covered in it.#which yeaaa yeaaa we have seen that already. kind of. but thats not the blood i want to see on him.#there's a difference between his blood and someone else's blood. his blood on him is natural. common. expected.#he's fine with it bc he's so fucking used to it.#now someone Else's blood? that's not as common. he avoids it at all cost. not bc of the blood itself#but rather its existence signifies his failure. to keep someone safe. to keep someone alive.#for him to be covered in someone else's blood he has to fail quite badly. and Boy do i have some immanent plans for that >:3c#all in all i am feeling Profoundly unhinged tonight. but in a creative sort of way.#unfortunately i dont have a brain for writing rn so none of it is being done. but i will do Something... later.#hopefully tomorrow. we'll see!
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