#im actually not really sad about it right now im doin fine

[that-darn-clown]

Im so soft

Squishy flesh

Big thighs

Fat tummy

And calves too wide to fit any tall socks

Kind brain

Anxious thoughts

Tender emotions

And a heart fit to break at any given moment

Being soft is a weakness

It's my weakness

And I don't want to be tough

I don't think I should have to be tough

My softness is what makes me who I am

A poem about being fat and sad!!!

[soupdeewoop]

Favorite lines from “The Secret of Us” 🌸

crossed lines, past lives, clear vision

held my breath for your reaction like the first time that we happened

we were fightin’ more than laughin’, black and blue, mm

fell hard then i lost your interest

all my friends they tried to stop me wanting you but i was never meant to listen, not until i found a reason

felt good about you til i didn't you felt nice for a bad decision felt good about you felt good about you

really got me thinkin, future plannin’ for no reason there were nights i skipped out sleepin’ cause of you and i had less than half of somethin’ what you gave was what i wanted til i realized i felt fuller without you

felt good about you til i didn't i felt good about you

look at me now said i wouldn't do it, but i hunted you down

you can just talk, and i'll stare at your mouth it could be bad, but i wanna find out

and i feel like i could die cause you're not here

god, im jumping in the deep end its more fun to swim in heard the risk is drownin’, but i'm gonna take it i'm gonna take it

isn't it fun? thinking im right when i'm probably wrong

you cant even speak but i think that its sweet yeah, i think that you're sweet

with the light on and you're not here

god, i'm actually invested haven't even met him

classic

i'm gonna bend ‘til i break  i wish you could hold me here, shakin’

why aren't you here in my bedroom? hopelessly boring without you

too soon to tell you "i love you" too soon to tell you "i love you"

wish that i was kidding i'm not, and i hate it

you're the risk, i'm gonna take it

i cut the rope and you fell from the tower i let it go for my peace of mind bit the bullet, it didn't hurt but i still hate the image of you kissing her chalk it up to "its all for the better"

are your conversations cool, like are you even interested? i know what you are, brighter than the stars tell me if she takes you far far enough away from all the baggage you've been carrying up another hill to all the girls who'll help you bury it they're just blowing smoke, i'll say what they won’t i know everything they don't

i sleep alone, im completely fine

if she's got a pulse, she meets your standards now? you feel nothing and yet you still let her

but i bet you're at her place right now you couldn't point her out in any crowd

and i find your books pretentious now at the time they'd fed the fantasy i was so impressed at your hotel took a drag and read aloud to me

and i bet you think about me now when you should be sleeping

and i know, i know, i know, i know and i know, i know, i (hey, hey, hey, hey) and i know, i know, i know, i know and i know, i (hey, hey, hey, hey) and i know, i know, i know, i know and i know, i know, i (hey, hey, hey) and i know, i know, i know, i know and i know, i

two augusts ago i told the truth, oh, but you didn't like it, you went home

i like to slam doors closed trust me, i know its always about me

two summers from now well have been talking, but not all that often, were cool now i'll be on a boat, you're on a plane going somewhere sane

and i'll have a drink wistfully lean out my window and watch the sun set on the lake it might not feel real, but it's okay, mh

cause that's just the way life goes i push my luck, it shows thankful you don't send someone to kill me

you were the best but you were the worst as sick as it sounds, i loved you first i was a dick, it is what it is a habit to kick, the age-old curse i tend to laugh whenever im sad stare at the crash, it actually works making amends, this shit never ends im wrong again, wrong again

the way life goes joyriding down our road lay on the horn to prove that it haunts me

hope that i don't, won't make it about me  i love you, im sorry

it felt just like a joke im sure you dont know were talkin’

i know your ghost i see her through the smoke

and if history’s clear, someone always ends up in ruins and what seemed like fate becomes "what the hell was i doin'?"

babylon lovers hangin’, lifetimes on a vine do you miss mine?

wonder if you regret the secret of us, us

it felt like somethin’ holy like souls pleadin, so it felt like what i've known you're twenty-nine years old so how can you be cold when i open my home?

give it ten months and you'll be past it (you'll be past it)

that night you were talkin’ false prophets and profits they makin’ the margins of poetry sonnets you never read upon it

the curse of a miracle, curse of an oracle youre incomparable, fuck it was chemical you (you) plus (plus) me (me) was

mistaken for strangers, no way in us, us the pain of the rain of the fain of us, us

the outline, well, sometimes do you miss us, us? (us, us, us) the best kind, well, sometimes do you miss us?

no, i know i'm a walking contradiction and it shows

and i've never craved someone's attention as much as yours, thought i should mention that

 i bet all my money that i will lose to you and hand you my life

dont love you yet, but probably will turn me into something tragic just for you, i let it happen

i lack context so i've made up all these lies it's the only thing that helps me sleep at night

and now i'm looking in the mirror you made me vain, i can't believe i have to be heard

here's to hoping you're worth all my time (ah, ah) i might barely know you, but still

you've turned all my skies to pouring rain locked me out the house again is this how you see me now? im reeling and i might break the windows, let myself back in lost it for a minute there get my shit together, its whatever, but i could die knowing that you're probably out somewhere while i'm in my underwear eating through my feelings, i'm still reeling, but its fin oh, thank god that you're not seeing this i'll spare you from everything if you would still have me, i'll be waiting all my life oh-oh

whatever, i let it happen whatever, i let it happen whatever, i let it happen i let it happen

i took a train to boston and i wanted to cry

i'll date for like a summer and i'll leave when i'm bored this train is full of strangers but i might like him more

when i left him there to feel it couldn't guess when i'd be leavin' for

no chance i waste my twenties on random men not one of them is cooler than all my friends

i feel like i'm home, there's a bar down the road i'm wasted with the sister of a boy that i met through someone back in college, she's a weird intellect she liked to tell the truth and she was harsh but direct her boyfriends all left, she had that effect

but that's just tough love and you're lucky to receive it, right?

i guess it's always funny until it's not

no, i'm not gonna miss the way he'd kick me in my bed while sleepin'

and i'm not gonna miss his old inflated ego, shallow thinking and i'm not gonna miss denying that i got my own damn reasons

not one of them is tougher than all my friends and i hate to leave him bleedin' but i know, know what i'm leavin' for

i swear to god, i haven't thought of you in ages

i understand, i changed your plans, i had to, baby

and i think that you earnestly have waited on apologies but i can't pretend that i'm sorry when i'm not sorry

so aren't you sad about the fact that you can't write me? i cheered the loudest for you when you won your trophies

and don't you feel alone at night or sorta kinda daily?

and we don't even know each other now and i'd blow all my plans if you'd meet me out

we could talk, we could get it, we could both calm down down (down, down)

it all changed for me and i told you (down) (down, down) you had the wrong idea about me (down) (down, down) and all i ever did was consider you (down) (down, down) until all i could do was consider me (down)

you don't know how to step outside yourself

you really thought you would get what you wanted (down) down, (down) down (down) down, (down) down 

you were the shoreline you were the crash and now i break

gave you i, gave you i, gave you i, gave you i

am i what you wanted? was i self-appointed?

all of my dark blue covered it for you but i'm just so embarrassed now

and you did all that i wouldn't do, erasing lines around us i held my head, i used to hold you, but now i'll walk around us and i can't lie and claim confused when i know just what happened you got bored, and i felt used, now i'm all sad about it

would it have killed you to explain that you weren't ready?

and, still, i gave you i, gave you i gave you i

my honest commitment i sat and listened i was your floorboard, holding it down

and could you not deny the truth? 'cause i know just what happened you got bored, and i felt used, now i'm all sad about it

when did you slip through my fingers, did i ever have you? was i just a placeholder to fill the hole inside you?

i held my head, i used to hold you but now i'll walk around us

and i won't lie and claim confused when i know just what happened

oh, you got bored, and i felt used, now i'm so sad about it

it's a normal thing to fall in love with movie stars when the lights are low and red at all their favorite bars

and the plotline was rare, swear i felt you right there maybe that was the beginning of our love affair

 did my pacing and reeling i even think it looked cute at times i know there's more than that feeling i didn't know it for most my life

you were great, what a show, but i don't recommend getting close, that's how it goes but i'll see you again

couldn't you go quiet? no one noticed, i did but i notice everything, so you're not different

i practice speeches in private i was impressed with my every line i think we call that performing that's not how i want to spend my life

getting close, should have known but i'll see you again

and you changed my life, but i guess i'll see ya 'cause it's over now, so i guess i'll see ya

he made you live out that nightmare and you nearly lost it you made a joke and you watched it go over his head

good luck, charlie i hope you're happy this isn't what you wanted you know that it's her or nothin'

you can go home at night and you might really not need her but you feel her everywhere, she is the love of your life

now it all comes down to you

good luck, charlie i hope you're happy

you openly admit you're far away from healing and i hate to pull the plug but i think i get your deal

you're the saddest, but a good kid almost loved you, but i didn't i could laugh now, how we tried to play those parts

and it's half of you that hurts sometimes, the half that i don't get i swear that i'm not mad at you, but i can't share your bed now

that you blew up on a tuesday how does pain taste when it melts into your tongue?

it's a pain that i caught you at a bad time it's a shame that i memorized your outline you were straight up with me, you were so kind but i knew what you knew, honey, great minds it was harsh 'cause i lost what i wanted i was brave when i kissed you in london we're collateral here, man, we got hit hope you find somewhere safe for your baggage every page that i wrote, you were on it feel you deep in my bones, you're the current and i showed no restraint, it was something i was scared until you made me love it

chances are i'll be here, we could share a lifeline if you feel like fallin', catch me on the way down

never been less empty, all i feel is free now

smoky, dark, crowded room, i need nothing under pink light in june (ah-ah-ah)

i burn for you and you don't even know my name if you asked me to i'd give up everything

break my heart and start a fire, you got me overnight

(just let me be) oh, close to you, close to you, close to you

you pull me in and touch my neck, and now i'm dying

you should be mine for life, i'll be signing every dotted line (ah-ah-ah)

chemical override, ultraviolet you could be mine tonight

pull the trigger on the gun i gave you when we met i wanna be close to you

just let me be close to you, close to you, close to you

[dirkspanelcollection]

Every page Eridan Ampora is in. Part 2

for your march Eridan editing needs.

+ all his (side of) pesterlogs (for fun)

From page 2458

From page 2464

Pesterlog from page 2467

CA: fef are you in

CA: that took forevver

CA: i wwas gettin wworried kinda

CA: man that guy

CA: hes a fuckin drama machine it is fuckin pathetic

CA: fuck SORRY

CA: yeah sorry

CA: i wwas just really wworried and stressed out i thought you wwere dead

CA: and i didnt evven get to thank you for savvin my life or really for anythin

CA: and i just spent all this time here wworryin and thinkin about stuff

CA: and i decided i havve something i wwant to tell you

CA: that ivve been meaning to get off my nub for a wwhile noww

CA: wwhoa really

CA: uh

CA: wwhat is it

CA: you go first

CA: yeah i knoww

CA: its ok maybe i wwill understand more than you think

CA: wwe might evven be sayin the same thing

CA: wwhoa

CA: wwait

CA: wwhat

CA: fuck

CA: this isnt what

CA: i dont knoww i wwasnt expectin this at all

CA: im not sure i can handle this

CA: no

CA: please dont

CA: look im bein serious here dont do this

CA: i wont even use my weird accent while i type ok so you know im bein really dead serious and honest about this

CA: ok good

CA: are you sure you arent bein hasty about this youve just been through a lot

CA: i mean we are supposed to be fated to be moirails arent we

CA: isnt that how it works

CA: you cant just throw all that away cause youre sick of me

CA: I DIDNT EVER NEED ANYONE TO LOOK AFTER ME

CA: i was totally fuckin fine my ambitions were noble

CA: and really none of your fuckin business QUITE FRANKLY your majesty

CA: and the only reason i put up with stickin my flipper in this fuckin shithole quadrant with you was

CA: nevermind

CA: ok fine

CA: i apologize for losin my shit over this i was just caught off guard is all

CA: but maybe its a good thing really

CA: actually i might a been proposin the same thing to be honest

CA: yeah

CA: fef have you thought about

CA: since you dont wanna be pale with me no more

CA: the possibility a some other type of arrangement with me

CA: i mean

CA: somethin a bit more

CA: kinda reddish

CA: like

CA: brighter red

CA: ok well what do you think about it

CA: now that youre thinkin about it

CA: why not i thought you said you liked me

CA: couldnt it be though

CA: dont you think theres room in your collapsin and expandin bladder based aquatic vascular system for those feelins

CA: oh god

CA: im the biggest fuckin idiot who ever lived

CA: i cant BELIEVE i just opened up to you like a chump when i knew what was comin

CA: i am one sad fuckin brinesucker

CA: overemotional sappy trash youre right im not better than anybody

CA: im worse than anybody

CA: EVERYBODY

CA: all the bodies CA: i cannot

CA: BELIEVE

CA: you are doin the fish pun thing while youre breakin up with me

CA: real nice

CA: whoops i mean REEL nice

CA: wwait

CA: dont go

From page 2467

Pesterlog from page 2475

CA: gam i need to talk to kar wwhere is he he isnt answwerin

CA: i dont feel comfortable wwith that

CA: i havve some serious feelins and problems here and i need some advvice

CA: wwhy

CA: wwhat the fuck do you mean by that

CA: are you sayin hes dead

CA: oh fuck

CA: oh god fuck noww i feel like an asshole

CA: that is the wworst fuckin advvice

CA: wwhat an awwful thing a you to say

CA: MAGIC ISNT REAL STUPID STOP BELIEVVIN IN IT

CA: this is a lot a pointless fuckin rubbish and isnt no emotional help to him or me either for that matter

CA: put kar on

CA: i dont knoww

CA: it probably doesnt matter

CA: my feelins seem petty and meaninless noww

CA: she had better things to wworry about than my ovverwwrought bullshit

CA: like the dead guy wwho savved her

CA: so forget it thanks anywway

CA: wwhat the FUCK are you fuckin babblin about

CA: are you recommendin a bevverage to me or somethin

CA: is that wwhat this is

CA: i dont havve a fuckin faygo you stupid fuck wwhy wwould i keep that disgusting shit on hand

CA: oh

CA: oh god youre right i do

CA: i totally forgot about it

From page 2476

From page 2477

From page 2497

From page 2505

Pesterlog from page 2547

FCA: hey sorry for bustin in on the memo but i cant get ahold of you youre not answwerin

FCA: gams advvice is fuckin useless all he told me wwas to enjoy a bevverage

FCA: i mean

FCA: its not evven that bad

FCA: its just soda but wwhatevver this isnt the point

FCA: i knoww i knoww

FCA: its just

FCA: i got a problem

FCA: wwith feferi

FCA: and im really kinda sittin here in bad shape about it emotionally speakin

From [S] make her pay

From page 2593

From page 2594

From page 2598

From page 2599

From page 2602

From page 2603

From page 2604

From page 2629

From page 2792

Dialoguelogs from page 2792

ERIDAN: wwhat a fuckin vvulgar display this is

ERIDAN: airin out all his dirty laundry like that puttin a big fuckin pile a horns in the middle of the room

ERIDAN: at least i got the upright basic decency to hide my shitty wand pile somewwhere in the lab you wwont find it dont evven bother lookin

------------------------------------

ERIDAN: hey ter can you go givve that four horned mustard blooded land licking sack of rubbish ovver there a message for me

ERIDAN: tell him to put his honey wwhere his mouth is and meet me outside for another duel

ERIDAN: swweet stinkin murder i am truly pathetic arent i

------------------------------------

ERIDAN: hey

ERIDAN: wwhats up

ERIDAN: yup

ERIDAN: god damn vvris wwhys it still got to be so flippin awwkwward like this come on

ERIDAN: wwe used to havve a good thing goin remember our campaigns

ERIDAN: that shit wwas epic wwhere are you evven goin to find a rivvalry like that

ERIDAN: oh as if im not so ovver it please spare me your disdain mindfang

ERIDAN: im wworkin on findin a neww rivvalry wwhichll make ours look like a kiddie game

ERIDAN: wwhich oh by the wway IT WWAS

------------------------------------

ERIDAN: fuck that fuckin wwitch bleww up my computer

ERIDAN: ok not literally the wwitch as in thats not literally her title or anythin

ERIDAN: the seer i guess

ERIDAN: fuckin lousy no good goddamn rotten seer

ERIDAN: shut yer spidertrap wwitch there are serious emotions happening ovver here

Pesterlog from page 2805

CA: wwho are you tryin to convvince wwith this ludicrous poppycock

CA: magic is NOT REAL

CA: wwhatevver youre doin its not real its somethin else outright entirely

CA: its fancy and impressivve and all but its not the fuckin figmental storybook claptrap you wwanna make out like it is

CA: so howw about you get off your high skyhorse

CA: youre not usin magic just DEAL WW IT

CA: ok i didnt say that

CA: i think you wwear the role pretty wwell wwhich is somethin i can appreciate

CA: theres a lot of showwmanship thats put in to comin off as a diabolical sort

CA: wwell fine you dont havve to behavve vvillainous if youre bent up on actin against the grain a your nobility or somesuch

CA: i can play that role its not like i evver didnt get my gils dirty before

CA: wwell arent you

CA: the wway you

CA: ok

CA: i had a misconclusion about that so my fault

CA: obvviously you got rich blood so maybe when you crash landed you wwerent recognized for it by wwhatevver vvehicle upholds the class structure in human society

CA: must of been fuckin brutal raisin up a commonblood wwhen you knew you wwere better than evverybody and its probably got you all messed up inside but maybe theres hope for you

CA: see i got a lot a experience bein nobility so ill let you knoww if you got a shot in hell at cuttin it pinkscarf

CA: fakemage pinkscarf howw does that sound

CA: see this is good i think this could be a good thing

CA: this thing wwe got goin

CA: you obvviously hate me and i think i got it in me to get the dark propensities smolderin

CA: and wwere both obvviously dangerous elites in nature

CA: i think theres somethin there i mean look at howw you evven came into the wworld

CA: killed a fuckin fuck ton of marine life accidental

CA: doin thats all i evver done practically the ocean wwas my killin cauldron

CA: hahahahaha see youre good wwith fish puns too i got so many a those you havve no idea

CA: i just think theres a fate thing here

CA: i mean i dont mean to strike you as too forwwardsuch but are you seein wwhere im goin wwith this

CA: look i understand you dont understand that kind of thing in your culture i get that

CA: but maybe i could teach you to get it

CA: yeah and in return maybe you could teach me howw to bullshit magic like that

CA: yes teach me your secrets wwitch

Pesterlog from page 2806

caligulasAquarium's [CA'S] computer exploded.

From page 2810

From page 3044

From page 3047

From page 3175

Pesterlog from page 3175

CA: noww that youre done makin all that pointless rubbish

CA: ivve got somethin wway more wworth your wwhile

CA: that couldvve been anyone

CA: lets not get distracted by your sad league of suitors and their flushed desperations

CA: im offerin you the edge here

CA: in your rivvalry wwith the other female

CA: wwevve got the same abstratus

CA: and i dont need this thing anymore

CA: since i became more powwerful than you could evver imagine as a mighty wwizard of wwhite science

CA: so you might as wwell take it and settle your score wwith that awwful wwitch

CA: yeah ok the seer then if you wwant to be dealin wwith technicalities

CA: oh

CA: wwell fuck

CA: suppose i wwas guessin it wwas natural to presume somesuch relation like that betwween the twwo a you

CA: oh i see so she shared her "magic secrets" wwith you then

CA: its probably a trap i wwouldnt trust her

CA: she is a cunnin and treacherous sort trust me i knoww her type

CA: you are slingin around such a bloody mess of slander wwith these accusations

CA: you wwouldnt understand anywway

CA: its already been painfully established you people cant get your shalloww think pans under the majesty of our quadrants

CA: if you must knoww things betwween us wwere gettin pretty bellicose and im pretty sure she wwas wwaxin as obsidian for me as a human got it in em to do

CA: and if not for the interdimensional divvide keepin us apart

honestly i dont doubt our rivvalry could be brewwin outright pitch

CA: but the thing is i need a rivval wwho can pose me a challenge

CA: and frankly shes not evven fit for holdin my cape anymore

CA: at this point i find all her adorable black pixie dabblins to be prime kiddie playtime shit

CA: all of her FRAUDULENT MAGICS cannot come close to posin threat to my mastery ovver the TRUEST SCIENCES

CA: an wwith my empiricists wwand i servve as the righteous hope that wwill incinerate delusion and the deluded alike

CA: my holy fire is the wwhite fury bled from the wwrath-wweary eyes of fifty thousand nonfictional angels

CA: and wwhen theyre finished wweepin they wwill boww before their prince

CA: so really you should be honored to inherit my old callin

CA: both my armaments and my feud

CA: itll be wwitch against wwitch

CA: a real one vvs an impostor

CA: faker one dies

CA: oh wwill you just take the fuckin gun already

CA: its a wway more powwerful wweapon than any of that crap you made

CA: its a legendary relic wwithout equal

CA: youre bein needlessly fuckin stubborn about this im doin you a fuckin favvor here

CA: if you accept it this is the last ill evver be botherin you about anythin ok

CA: FFFFFFWW

CA: thats the code

Pesterlog from page 3176

CA: howws that possible

CA: its a one of a kind wweapon plundered from an alternian ghost ship

CA: probably a cheap imitation of the original

CA: uh

CA: kind of like that one there is

CA: so theres your answwer stable loops ahoy

CA: noww enjoy the utter fuckin domination it affords

CA: wwhos that

CA: wwhy

CA: wwhat the fuck is a grandson

CA: is that some kind of pervverse human familial thing

CA: nevvermind then your procreational biologistics make my fins curl in distaste

CA: settle dowwn jade youre radically underestimatin the amount of shit i dont givve about this

CA: ill havve you knoww this is the last time im plannin on talkin to any human

CA: i got bigger ships to sink and soon wwhen im good and ready me and my luminous fuckin science stick havve got a date wwith jack noir

CA: AND NO NOT THAT KIND OF DATE GIVVE ME A LITTLE FUCKIN CREDIT

CA: wwhys this matter so hush hush anywway

CA: wwell maybe he didnt wwanna disrupt wwhatevver disgustin sequence of evvents wwas responsible for his spawwnin in the first place

CA: ok i think im startin to feel ill talkin about things makin me fathom pink wwigglers comin out a your owwn personal torso

CA: so change a fuckin subject

CA: that gun i just gavve you is somethin of a hatchright to the kid

CA: happy i could play a role in your dirty stinkin lineage

CA: no wwe dont knoww our direct forebears and im pretty sure any attempt to seek out or evven inquire about the supplier of your genes wwould be a fine wway to get yourself killed

CA: but wwevve got our lore and it says wwe all got indivvidual ancestors wwho contribute to most of our genes abovve and beyond wwhat the grubs slurry does

CA: oh shut up

CA: anywway a lot of us believve wwere meant to trace the footsteps of those ancestors evven though wwe can nevver knoww em

CA: and on that journey wwe can come across belongings they once had cause wwe wwere hatched to find em and finish their wwork

CA: i kinda think thats wwhy i found the gun in the first place

CA: but noww im forsakin it because fuck i just found a better destiny than my old crappy one wwhich i nevver got any appreciation for anywway

CA: wwhat do you mean

CA: aww man come on

CA: god damn it

CA: its like you people go out of your wway to think a howw to disrespect me

CA: fine fuck it wwhat do i care

CA: this has been a completely flippin useless exchange as havve they all been wwith your species

CA: and for the record

CA: evven though i said that stuff about bein fated to find my gun

CA: fate isnt real

CA: its a lot of FAKE FUCKIN HORSEFEATHERS

CA: noww go and be cleansed by the light of truth purity nonfakeness hope and abovve all SCIENCE

From page 3178

From page 3181

[S] Kanaya: enter the core

Every page Eridan Ampora is in.

for your march Eridan editing needs.

+ all his (side of) pesterlogs (for fun)

From page 2066

From page 2087

Pesterlog from page 2343

CA: kan make her talk to me do somethin

CA: your no good connivvin fuckin backstabbin girl crush thats wwho

CA: pshhhhhh that is a fuckin laugh and you knoww it evveryone does

CA: so help me out tell her to talk to me i think she blocked me you got to CA: wwhatEVVER you are so the vvillage twwo wwheel devvice wwhen it comes to auspisticing

CA: you cant let a grudge go by you wwont stick your busy stem betwwixt so get wwith the program fussyfangs

CA: wwho givves a shit wwhy she blocked me or about my fuckin manners come on youvve got a wway wwith her

CA: i figure if youre going to auspisticize any twwo brinesuckers wwho sneer at each other a funny wway you might as wwell make it official and be ours right

CA: she made me somethin per a prior arrangement

CA: she wwill delivver it wwhen wwe meet in this game but i dont knoww wwhat the logistics are yet

CA: im tryin to connoiter wwith her here but shes blowwin me off again fickle dirtscrapin landhag

CA: kan stupid wwhat do you think its a fuckin gizmo to bloww up the wworld or somethin

CA: ok wwell not that obvviously

CA: but somethin thatll kill all land dwwellers wwhat else wwould i be after

CA: wwell

CA: im not goin to vvery wwell kill you am i that wwould be fuckin unconscionable

CA: wwhat kind of friend wwould i be

CA: yeah go ahead and kiss us off but therell be blood on your hands

CA: you could either play along as our auspistice and do a little mediating like you wwere fuckin hatched to

CA: or wwatch she and me devvolvve into fuckin full fledged kismesisses the kind like you dont get once in ten thousand swweeps

CA: you knoww thats wwhat it wwould be there wwould be rainboww rivvers runnin through star systems and all nebulizin like liquid firewworks

CA: it wwill be beautiful and heartbreaking all at once

CA: you should read up on your history instead of poring through that godawwfull sunny rubbish

CA: yeah it does its important sorry but the fate of the race and purity of the bloodline is important excuse me for being concerned

CA: huh

CA: wwell ok

CA: ordinarily id call bullshit on terrible stinkin bs like that but i knoww you dont really lie about stuff

CA: unless its to yourself

CA: but thats wwhy i bother evven talking to you i wwouldnt evven be here SAYIN any of this otherwwise

CA: so did your clouds tell you that

CA: i got clouds and they dont tell me SHIT they hide nothin but misfortune and monstrosities

CA: fuckin pain in the ass fuckin clouds

CA: so howw do you knoww then

CA: ok wwell you are jacked tight the fuck into this thing in so many wways i dont knoww wwhat to say anymore

CA: wwhatevver wwe wwill just play and find out i guess

CA: so can you tell her to talk to me anywway

CA: god dammit

CA: she and me are teammates wwevve got to havve a powwwwoww or SOMETHING

CA: fuck

CA: fine i get it ill step off

CA: you dont wwant to be our auspistice cause you dont wwant to get locked into that sort of relation wwith her i can respect that

CA: yeah it is your real feelins run pretty awwful RUDDY methinks evverybody knowws it

CA: especially that assblood karkat he and me havve you so pegged about that its upright silly

CA: but its cool its totally fine dont wworry ill leavve you alone and givve you a shot

CA: wwhat

CA: wwhoa wwait wwho

CA: ok wwait did she talk to you today

CA: wwhat did she say

CA: or glub or wwhatevver

CA: WWWWHAT

CA: wwait

CA: did she actually say that

CA: in confidence

CA: can you copy exactly wwhat she said

CA: this is bullshit youre bee essing me in some wway awwful

CA: you dont lie but you do tease and ill tranfuse my kickass royal blood out wwith incontinent musclebeast discharge if i wwont knoww wwhen im gettin hooked

CA: awwww fuck

CA: see im tellin you

CA: you got to play your cards right CA: if youre not savvvvy about howw you define yourself to peopleCA: you can just splash into the moirail zone before you knoww wwhich wways upwwardCA: kan its hard

CA: being a kid and growwing up

CA: its hard and nobody understands

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CA: fef

CA: hey

CA: glub

CA: yeah

CA: hm

CA: wwhat

CA: nothins on my mind wwhy cant i just fuckin talk and glub at you for a reason i dont havve

CA: wwell fine but you dont wwant to hear it CA: uhuh wwhatevverCA: yeah wwell ok since wwe are the PALEST OF PALS A GUY COULD EVVER ASK FOR

CA: i wwill tell you

CA: evven though you wwill only humor me as usual since you dont agree wwith my agenda

CA: any of my agendas really

CA: none of the agendas

CA: none of them

CA: see

CA: more condescension

CA: you are goin to make a hell of an empress

CA: so

CA: i got to keep tryin thats howw all the great military masterminds became great through upright persevverance

CA: it isnt wwrong

CA: im not going to explain it to you again

CA: at this point all you need to knoww is its important to me

CA: and im doing it for us

CA: i mean our kind

CA: nobody understands not evven you

CA: pshh

CA: hemospectrum begs to differ

CA: wwhatevver

CA: i havve to keep an eye on em up here

CA: its all about tactics

CA: history is full of cases wwhere conquerers consort wwith members of the enemy in a mannerly wway before wwipin them out CA: evven goin as far as growwin fond a some

CA: its only civvilized

CA: all your feelins are fishy

CA: GLUBGLUBGLUBGLUBGLUBGLUB

CA: ill glub in wwhatevver dumbass bubbly soundin fishnoise i wwant to glub

CA: ok please lets just not get into the wwhole fuckin fish pun thing again ok

CA: like wwe get it wwe are nautically themed

CA: but yeah i dunno

CA: i dont knoww wwhy she ignores me i guess shes just bored wwith me

CA: wwe had it all set up for her to givve me this thing tonight that probably doesnt evven wwork but yeah maybe that wwasnt the point

CA: i mean you think wwe havve a pretty good rivvalry goin right

CA: or at least had

CA: it wwas pretty fuckin bitter and contentious for a wwhile there and there wwas some good chemistry i dont knoww wwhat happened

CA: it doesnt matter like i said shes bored shitless

CA: i guess im not as good a advversary as i thought

CA: ehhh

CA: wwell ok thanks for sayin so

CA: shrug

CA: maybe

CA: seems kinda

CA: odd though

CA: wwell those are my stupid feelins wwhat about yours

CA: seems to me like you get along too wwell wwith evverybody to be harborin any black sentiments

CA: yeah

CA: oh god

CA: uh

CA: ok fef

CA: this is NONE OF YOUR DAMN BUSINESS

CA: i gotta go

CA: be back later wwhen its time to play

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[nataliedanovelist]

GF - Timestuck AU: The Power of Mabel ch.2

While fighting over a time machine so one twin can win a pig or the other can win the heart of a girl, Mabel is left stranded in a snowy forest with no time machine and no brother. Oops.

The BEAUTIFUL art pieces were done by @clownwry and @elishevart ! THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! 😭❤️💋

ch.1 - ch.3

~~~~~~~~~~

Ford was way more nervous than he was letting on.

She had long, pretty brown hair, braces over her teeth, sneakers, a skirt, and a sweater that allowed the cold air to pass through it. Her cheeks were slightly chubby with youth and nosy, as well as her nose, due to the freezing weather. Her eyes matched her hair perfectly, and though they were clouded with fear and confusion, Ford swore he could see sparkling behind the clouds, sparkling that made itself well-known when she asked if she could make him a sweater or when she saw his hands.

She had long, pretty brown hair, braces over her teeth, sneakers, a skirt, and a sweater that allowed the cold air to pass through it. Her cheeks were slightly chubby with youth and nosy, as well as her nose, due to the freezing weather. Her eyes matched her hair perfectly, and though they were clouded with fear and confusion, Ford swore he could see sparkling behind the clouds, sparkling that made itself well-known when she asked if she could make him a sweater or when she saw his hands.

Ford would be lying if he said he didn’t enjoy Mabel’s company, but she was practically a stranger, and keeping a random girl in his house that was located in the middle of the woods was fishy and Ford couldn’t help but feel like it was illegal. But he couldn’t leave her out in the snow and send her on her way to find her home and family, so he decided to keep her warm or healthy, simply because it was the right thing to do.

But then she said she had no parents to call. Only a brother, who was lost, too. Ford can remember the old rule: If you’re lost, stay where you are until you are found. So he then decided that she could stay here until her brother found her, which should be by morning at the latest.

Still, he felt uneasy, so once Mabel was settled in front of the TV, Ford excused himself and went into the kitchen to make a phone call. There was only one man who would have better judgement in this situation than him.

The phone rang a few times. Ford checked his watch to make sure it was a reasonable time to call. It wasn’t Sunday, was it? But then the ringing stopped. “Howdy! This here Fiddleford McGucket.”

“Hey there, buddy.” Ford smiled to himself at hearing that cheerful voice. “How have you been?”

“Stanford Pines! Good t’hear from ya!” Fiddleford cheered. “M’just fine, just fine! How are ya?! Ya haven’t gotten eaten by monsters yet, have ya?” He laughed, making his old friend chuckle along.

“No no, I’m alright.” Ford almost brought up the reason he called, but then he remembered something very important to Fiddleford. “How are Emma-May and Tater?”

“OH! They’re doin’ great! We’re all very happy n’ doin’ well! Ya won’t believe how big Tate’s gotten since ya last saw him! He’s already crawlin’!”

“Wow, that's great to hear.” Ford sat in a chair at the kitchen table. “Has he said his first words yet?”

“No, not quite. Actually, he’s extremely quiet. Not a lot of baby-babble.” Fiddleford chuckled. “The doctor says that’s perfectly normal. Tate’s so smart, he’s reachin’ for specific colors n’ such, n’ ya can tell he’s thinkin’ a lot n’ knows what’s goin’ on, he just got nothin’ t’say.”

“I was very shy when I was young.” Ford commented casually. He didn't feel like mentioning why. “If Tate is anything like either of his parents he’s very intelligent.”

“Oh, he’s so much like both of us it’s scary. Ya know Emma-May, so clever n’ quiet n’ such. Tate’s got all that. But he already looks so much like me! But he’s got his mama’s hair! N’ Santy Claus brought ‘im this fun little fishin’ game where ya fish for plastic fish with a pole with a magnet on it, n’ he loves it! I can’t wait to take ‘im fishin’ when he’s big enough! Ya really outta give yourself a break n’ come down for a visit, he’d move to see his Uncle Ford again.”

Ford’s face felt hot. “Perhaps. Spring is when a lot of anomalies are active and breeding, so i would prefer not to miss that, but maybe I could visit for a weekend before that…”

“Well, no pressure, I won’t assume anythang until ya tell me to, just know there’s always a bed for ya here.”

“Thank you, Fiddleford. The same for you and your family. The clean air will do everyone some good.”

“Oh, I’m sure.” Fiddleford sighed happily and perked up. “So! Whatcha callin’ for? Not that I’m not happy just t’chat, but ya never call.”

Ford laughed and shrugged to himself. “I suppose I don’t. I’m sorry.”

“No need t’be sorry, Stanford, just wanna know what’s up.”

“Well, I was hoping to get your advice on something.”

“Shoot.”

“Um… well…” Ford rubbed the back of his neck, unsure how to tell him this. “I heard some unusual sounds outside today…”

“What kind of unusual sounds?”

“Cracks, like lightning. And some faint yelling.” Ford answered. “I thought it might be a tree branch or a new anomaly to catalogue, but when I opened the door a young girl was standing there in the snow with no coat.”

“Heavens! Is she alright?!”

“She’s okay, no frostbite. She was cold, but after sitting by the fire, drinking some hot chocolate, and changing into some dry clothes, she’s okay now.”

“Well, good.”

“So of course I brought her in. I tried to call her parents, she probably got lost playing…”

“Sure.”

“... but she says she doesn’t have any parents.”

“Oh.” Fiddleford sighed. “Oh. Now, wait, are ya sure she didn’t just say that so ya wouldn’t call?”

Ford chuckled and said, “I first thought that too, but she looked too sad to be lying.”

“Okay, I see. Does she got somebody ya can call?”

“She says she has a brother, but he was out there, too. So he is probably out there looking for her and therefore nowhere near a phone.”

“Fair enough, okay. So, I reckon y’all are waitin’ for him t’come ‘round.”

“Yup.”

“Well sounds to me like you’ve handled this all pretty well.” Fiddleford said confidently.

“You think so?” Ford asked. “I can’t help but feel like I’m doing something wrong. Like I’m missing something. Am I doing something wrong?”

“Nonsense, buddy, you’re doin’ great.” Fiddleford assured. “Look here, ya can’t just leave a young gurl out in the snow t’try t’find her way home...”

“I agree.”

“... so ya really got one option n’ that’s t’keep an eye on her n’ let her in as a guest. N’ ya tried t’call, but nothin’. The best thang ya can do right now is be there for this lil’lady n’ just be kind t’her. N’ if nobody comes for her by mornin’, why don’t ya go into town n’ see if anybody knows her, then they can help y’all out.”

Ford nodded, then remembered that his best friend couldn’t see it, so he said, “Yeah, that sounds like a good plan. Thank you, Fiddleford.”

“You’re welcome. N’ hey, are ya okay?” He asked seriously.

“Yes, yes I’m okay. I just want to make sure I do this right.”

“O’course. I understand. Ya want me t’come down there n’ give a hand?”

“No, that’s not necessary. I’m sure Mabel will find her brother in the morning.”

“Mabel, huh? Well, if y’all don’t, please call me. N’ even if ya do find her brother, call me. Keep me updated.”

“I will. Thank you, Fiddleford.”

“Anytime, Stanford.”

~~~~~~~~~~

When Mr. Ford gave Mabel the remote for the old TV and went into the kitchen, she decided to use her awesome detective skills to figure out what year it was. If it was before Grunkle Stan lived here and opened the Mystery Shack, she must be pretty far back in time. But she had no way of knowing if it was 1999 or 2005 or the 50s.

The TV was old, but so was Grunkle Stan’s in her time. So Mr. Ford could have had this TV for a long time and didn’t want to replace it. 

Okay, so when was the TV made? Mabel didn’t know. Dipper would have known.

Okay, Grunkle Stan mentioned watching TV when he was a kid once or twice. So at least Mabel was when Stan was a kid, okay. 

Mabel turned the TV on and it was in color. Okay, so she wasn’t too far back in time. But the TV was playing a commercial for clear skin. The picture was gritty and all the people in it had puffy hair and long socks and oh my god was that woman wearing legwarmers?! Mabel grinned at seeing her favorite fashion on TV, but then her face dropped. When was she?

She tapped her chin and tried to think of how to know the date without being suspicious. She could ask Mr. Ford, but that might be suspicious. Mabel decided to start flicking through channels to try to guess what year she was in based on what was airing. A lot of shows were about cowboys, space, or game shows. Huh. Okay.

All the TV shows were definitely older. Nothing her dad would watch from when he was a kid, so if Mabel had to guess by everyone’s crazy air, the cheesy TV shows, and the music occasionally playing, she was in the 70s.

Huh. Okay. But she needed an exact year. So Mabel turned off the TV, saw an old radio on a desk, and turned it on to listen.

“... cuz it’s cold doesn’t mean you can't boogie, folks! So grab someone you wanna get warm with, turn up the music, and get your bodies warm in the coolest way possible! Here’s Night Fever, by the Bee Gees!”

Mabel grinned at the disco music. Her personal favorite song from these guys was More Than a Woman, but Night Fever would do. For a moment Mabel forgot her mission, jumped off the couch and left the blanket behind, and in the over-sized gray t-shirt Mr. Ford gave her while her clothes were drying, she danced along to the music, singing the chorus since those were the only words she knew.

“When you reach out for me. Yeah, and the feelin' is right,

Then I get night fever, night fever. We know how to do it! Gimme that night fever, night fever. We know how to show it!”

Mabel laughed at herself as she spun around in her socks and tried to do the point-and-hype dance she didn’t know the name to, but everyone did it when a disco song played.

Little did she know that Ford had returned to check on her, and was smiling at her as she shook her hips and waved her hair around and had fun. He leaned against the doorway and planned to let her dance in peace, but when she did a spin and saw him, she grinned and took his hand. “C’mon, Mr. Ford, come dance with me!”

Ford chuckled and shook his head. “No, no! I can’t dance!”

“You got two legs that aren’t broken?”

“Yes.”

“Then you can dance! C’mon!” Mabel encouraged, let him go when they were both in the middle of the room, and she started to dance again. “Don’t make me dance alone!” She even pulled an evil move and gave him puppy eyes. Rude.

Ford smiled slyly at her and hesitantly copied her boogie moves. It was true that Ford never liked to dance, but there was no one around but Mabel, and though he had only known her for an hour or more, he was sure she would never make fun of him.

And he was right.

“Wow! Look at you, Mr. I-Can’t-Dance! Yeah!” Mabel hopped on the couch, standing, and took Ford’s hand. “Here, I’ll spin you!”

Ford laughed and allowed it, doing a single spin, but then scooping her in his arms to dip her and then let her down, making her laugh as they continued to dance. 

“Alright alright, you crazy cats, that was Night Fever by the Bee Gees! It's a snowy day here in the heart of Oregon, with snow flurries coming in harder all night, but it should clear up by morning and be a fun day to go out and play! The date is January 26th, 1978 in case you gotta write a check or mail a thank you note to a friend or family member. I’m still writing letters for Christmas! We’ll be right back with some of your favorites after a word or two from our sponsors, so don’t go anywhere!”

Mabel stared at the radio. “Wow, 1978.” She breathed. Her parents were only kids right now, maybe only six or seven-years-old. Wow.

Ford chuckled. “I know, I’m still in the bad habit of writing ‘77.”

Mabel realized her mistake, but was grateful her host misunderstood her. “Me too.”

“Well, I don’t know about you, but I’m ready for dinner. How about some ramen noodles?”

“Yes, please! Can we play a game after we eat?”

“Sure. I don’t have many board games, but I do have a deck of cards.”

“Do you know any card tricks?!”

“A few.” Ford admitted, wiggling his fingers. “There are some advantages to having more fingers than average.”

Mabel grinned up at him and followed him to the kitchen for dinner.

[spicy-tomato]

dream taking reader from the back while Friends by Chase Atlantic is playing in the background 👀

-also may I be 🪐 anon? if not that's absolutely fine! ly stay safe!

yooo ive been working on so many things i forgot i finished this one! hopefully its how you wanted it to be cause im v proud of it. heavy angst in the beginning but it ends with rough smut and fluff

Just tell me what youre doin with that other guy

Your friends had invited you to a party, you didnt want to be here but your most recent boy toy, quackity, had insisted that you both go because he wanted to show you off. As soon as you both got there however, he ran off with some of his friends, leaving you to stand around with your absolutely plastered group of girl friends. They all kept talking about this one guy on the other side of the room who they said was “bad news”. You had no idea who they were talking about until your eyes met.

“I bet i could get in his pants first, i dont care how bad of an idea it is.” says one of your friends.

All of your girlfriends are wasted, they want it, they chase it

You couldnt just let her say that about him, as much as you were mad at him you couldnt stand her degrading him like that. “Actually him and i used to mess around, i kinda miss him to be honest….he was always so sweet and perfect to me.” you retaliate to your friends humiliating comment about the guy you regret losing.

“Youre joking. You do know hes literally the biggest fuckboy ever. Theres no way in hell im even letting you go near him tonight, besides you have quackity now.” gemma said, she may be wasted but she was always the mom of the group. You sigh and go back to your solo cup full of whatever clear alcohol you poured into it earlier.

All of your friends have been here for to long, they must be waiting for you to move on

Gemma continued to watch you for the next several hours until your eyes caught his again. Dream was a fitting name for him, he was like a dream come true for you with his dirty blonde hair and soft, freckled covered face. He always towered over you but it made you feel safe.

Girl, im not with it, im way to far gone

As your eyes met you could tell he was gone, his eyes devouring your skin as if he could still see what you looked like beneath your small skirt and crop top. You shudder at his predatory gaze before he gestures up the stairs and walks away, leaving you shuddering and trying to figure out what he was up to.

“Hey, im gonna run to the kitchen for a drink, ill be back in a sec.” you said and gemma nodded as you quickly make your way through the crowded space and up the stairs.

Heart on your sleeve like youve never been loved

You couldnt lie, you really didnt like quackity but after everything went downhill with dream you just needed someone to be there for you and he happened to walk in at the wrong time. As you get to the top of the stairs, dream pulls you quickly into a bathroom and locks the door before pressing you against it.

Runnin in circles now look what youve done

He looked a mess, eyes puffy and red, obviously not all there after drinking so much.

“Look what youve done to me, really look at it. I havent been the same since i let you go, i made a mistake. Please...please come back.” youve never seen him like this, begging for a second chance.

Give you my word as you take it and run

“How can i trust you wont hurt me again. You said that you would never hurt me then you went and did what you did. How do i know you arent lying?” he looks down, one hand reaching out to take yours.

“Let me prove it to you”

Wish youd let me stay, im ready now

“You cant just walk back into my life and expect me to just take you at your word or let you ‘make it up to me’. What you did tore me apart dream” your eyes go dark as you look at him with anger and sadness.

Just give me some time and space to realize

“After not being with you for so long, it made me realize how much i need you in my life” he looks at you with desperation

And what the hell were we? Tell me we werent just friends, this doesnt make much sense

“You told me that all we would ever be is friends when i told you how much i loved you, how much i still love you. After all of that, after all the tears ive spilled for you, you just expect to walk back in here and regain my love and trust?” you take his hand softly, “thats not how it works as bad as i want it to work that way.”

But im not hurt im tense, cause ill be fine without you, babe

“I lied, i told you i would be fine and that i didnt need your or love you like you love me but i lied. I was so scared of you leaving that i pushed you away. Please, just give me one more chance…” he looked so sad as he said that. Opening up was never one of his strong points so you took what he said to heart.

Wish youd let me stay, im ready now

“Then make it up to me.” you smirk at him as he looks up at you with wide eyes. “Make me forget everything you did to hurt me and maybe i'll give you another chance.” he smirks and his eyes go dark with lust before he pulls you from against the door and bends you over the sink. Your phone rings an you check to see who it is

Incoming call from: quackity

You toss your phone to the side quickly as dream starts to tug at your skirt, tugging it down quickly to see you had nothing on under it.

“Its like you came here ready for me to fuck you princess. Being so naughty with nothing on under this skimpy little skirt.” he slaps your ass hard and you lurch forward with a moan. He pulls your hands behind your back, pinning them there with one hand as the other starts to play with you, putting one finger in and pulling a moan from your throat. “Such pretty noises, god why did i ever let a perfect little thing like you go.” he adds a second finger and starts to thrust them relentlessly as you moan and beg from under him, the familiar tune of a song you played for him drifting up the stairs as you slowly come undone below him. He chuckles darkly before pulling his fingers out, dragging a whine from you before he quickly replaces it, thrusting into you all at once and setting a rough pace. He uses his free hand to tug you back by your hair and make you look in the mirror.

“Look at how much of a mess you are for me, no one else can make you feel like this princess, youre all mine.” he finishes his sentence with a particularly rough thrust that makes you scream out, coaxing an orgasm you didnt even know you were so close to out of you as he keeps going. You watch your form in the mirror, seeing how ruined you looked with tears running down your cheeks and ruined makeup. He laughs behind you before pulling you up to his chest and moving the hand that was pinning your behind your back to your throat, applying light pressure. You let out a silent moan and throw your head back before he leans down and bites it.

“Such a dirty girl, getting off on my hand around your neck” he puts more pressure on your neck before biting above his hand. Your eyes roll back as you cum around him again with a muffled scream. He pulls his hand from your neck and starts to bite and suck on it, his hips stuttering as he comes closer to his end. “S-so fucking good for me princess, never gonna let you go again” as he say that he fills you up with a gutteral moan and you throw your hands back to grip his hair. You both take a second to come down before he pulls out, causing you to whine before he helps you put your skirt back on and turns you to face him.

“Give me another chance?” he smiles softly at you.

“Only if you take me home.” he nods quickly and takes your hand, leading you down the stairs an past your friends and your “boyfriend”

“Hey babe, where are you going with that asshole?” quackity asks before trying to pull you away from dream.

“Actually quackity, we’re over...sorry!” with that, both you and dream rush out of the house and to his car before getting in. he takes you back to his apartment and you both curl up on the couch, you laying on his chest with a content smile as he pulls a blanket over the both of you. You fall asleep in his arms, knowing that it was just right.

[youve-doomed-us-all-jerk]

ok lessa watch yj s4!

first it might be just cuz it looks closer to s1 and 2, but the removal of the cheekbone shadows on some the characters look much better imho especially conner, its the bishe twunkness

thats hyden walch i kno PB's va anywhere, and i guess starfire lmao

oop is that cassies new wondergirl costume? i dig it

mars lore dump, dunno much about it so this is cool, i do know they have some connection to the life equation so :o

martian conservative

is the legion girl saturn girl? i actually dont remember if there were martians in the legion cuz i only remember that one cartoon from yrs ago (edit* oop it was chameleon boy)

wow a plot line about how rebels fighting for a worthy cause can "take it too far" and "become the monsters people think they r" in a superhero show? never heard of, incredible new and original what will they think of next lol 😛

this is still rated r right? we gonna see some spaceship sex scenes 😳

oh no j'onns gonna die in the zeta tube isnt he, they talking him up too much

I KNEW IT

oop return of superhero therapy sessions

ok ep 1 done, now for ep 2

aye glad j'onn is safe, unless its a bait n switch

knew it was saturn girl, only blonde in the future, probably not but lmao

sibling dramaaa

gars in his angsty era

also animation seems way more consistent than in s3, glad for that, studio mir :D (i think i remember reading a tweet that said they did all the animation but idk if thats confirmed confirmed)

I'm glad they rolled back on all the characters and are focusing on a smaller cast, wasnt digging the glee approach towards trying to juggle all the legacy and new characters, and the batman characters 😏, tho that may just be for now lmao

oh i assume the plot is superboy and MM's marriage opens the doors to earth and mars working together, which then opens the doors for earth to become a bigger part of the galaxy and basically its what kicks off to future earth having so much more aliens and metas and is how the legion of superheroes were born and someones trying to prevent that lmao

anyway does superman X show up or what? remember him lmao

its that petty bitch desaad

after credits sadness, is that gonna be happenin all season lmao why cant we have like "oh im doin fine, just got a bagel was p good"

ok done with the first 2 eps! i really enjoyed them, now to wait till thursday

[willowistic22]

ok im gonna say it, what taylor swift song is romeo besides love story

Haha was waiting for this one actually. Can’t believe I can’t use love story grr. but yeah i get it. though plsss gimmie the chance to add a little bit of love story? I just love that song yknow. And jfc when I say ‘love’ it doesn’t always mean the romantic kind, aight? N e wayyys lesgo !

Love story. Pretty self explanatory actually. ‘We were both young when I first saw you’ I feel that him being a hopeless romantic started pretty young. He was young dumb but in love and that’s basically how he is when he’s in love. He loves the feeling when he first falls in love, when a love is still young. You don’t really know what you’re doing but you still act like you are because you can’t help it. Romeo mostly embrace the the whole being young and in love just because he loves the feeling and believes that PDA isn’t as bad as ppl might think. Well, not entirely but just enough yknow.

Invisible String. The song is basically the soulmate trope in a song form. And he does believes in soulmates. Let me crack into the... angsty stuff heheh >:). He has a long history of loving himself and sometimes doubt that there are ppl out there that would actually like him yknow. So he pretends there’s like this invisible string that connects him to others. Like destined to meet these few certain ppl. That’s what has kept him afloat all this time. Not many ppl would know it but it’s the truth.

Wonderland. ‘Didn't they tell us don't rush into things?’ and also ‘We found Wonderland, you and I got lost in it’ Now this one is more towards his mentality in stuff. Sometimes when he’s clouded with love (romance or otherwise, take your pick) he gets too easily excited like ‘woah!!! someone likes me!!!’ and goes a bit too quickly. Many ppl were scared off by how clingy this kid can get. Romeo has learned to calm himself yknow, but sometimes he gets too lost and forgets all about it. The second one is mostly because, in plain simple words, he thinks the world is full of shit. His mental health has been hit hard and some days just seem so plain and boring and he’s tired and he didn’t even know why he got up that morning. Sometimes he closes his eyes to pretend he’s somewhere he wants to be. Where he’s wanted and it’s acceptable to cling on ppl. Where he’s not tired and the world around him is in fact wonderful to be in.

Blank Space. Some ppl will describe him of having an endless list of ppl he was once associated with. Call it lovers, friends, whatever. Mostly they get scared bcs the more time they spent with Romeo, more of his true colors are being shown. Some impressions Romeo left them was ‘annoying’ ‘clingy’ and ‘too serious in stuff’. It’s only because Romeo just wants to find a connection. He likes stuff with meaning behind it. Not those meaningless relationships or small talk. He wants to find someone to give his all. Obv these ppl has shown him that when Romeo is proper and polite, just like the way he usually presents himself towards strangers, they like him but not when he’s being his passionate self and so they don’t deserve his heart. ‘Got a long list of ex-lovers, they'll tell you I'm insane’ Lots of ppl misunderstands his passionate self as ‘crazy’. But that’s just how he feels his feelings. Whether he’s sad, happy, or angry. It’s all because he has all this passionate energy to use up. Now here’s the kicker: he doesn’t give up to find that connection. He knows he’ll most likely get his heart broken again but he’s resilient. 

Lover. Yes, yes, we’ve made it perfectly clear that he’s a hopeless romantic. But this song specifically resonates with him. ‘Have I known you 20 seconds or 20 years?’ Romeo never half asses anything when it comes to getting to know others. He will go out of his way to listen to your laughter and sorrows because he loves the human personality. He thinks it’s so complex and amazing. Sometimes in one conversation he can really get a lot of information from someone. ‘With every guitar string scar on my hand, I take this magnetic force of a man to be my lover’ After all that disappointment he is still determined to love. Like I said before he’s resilient when it comes to these things. ‘Can I go where you go? Can we always be this close forever and ever?’ Once you got his love he will stick with you forever. This might be in a way calling him clingy and maybe he is. But that’s just how he shows his loyalty towards someone. And the rest of the song is basically what it’s like for Romeo to be in love and to be loved by Romeo. Beautiful and at peace, like you’re floating on clouds and everything in the world doesn’t matter anymore.

...Ready For It. Haha yes this sounds like a stretch but bare with me. ‘But if he’s a ghost, then I can be a phantom. Holding him for ransom, some’ I feel that despite the ‘bad impression’ he’s given ppl that left him, he did left some form a good mark on them too. Some have tried to insert themselves back in his life, realizing that maybe Romeo isn’t as bad as they thought he was. Of course, there are others that don't, which is always fine for Romeo’s end because he does understand that he’s ‘not for everyone’. ‘In the middle of the night, in my dreams. You should see the things we do, baby’ Despite his openness to love anyone, he does have his own standards. A vivid version of the kind of ppl he would like to share his heart with but he doesn’t over stretch himself to get them to like him other than maybe the usual meeting a person for the first time.

Don’t Blame Me. ‘Don't blame me, love made me crazy. If it doesn't, you ain't doin' it right’ Let me tell you that when it comes to forming a connection/relationship, it really brings out Romeo’s true colors. And I’ve said before that that’s when ppl start leaving him bcs he doesn’t like his passion being executed in a lot of aspects of his other personality. He’s considered ‘crazy’ for that. ‘Lord, save me, my drug is my baby, I'd be using for the rest of my life’ But when it comes to connecting to the right ppl, he will shine and thrive. Maybe he’ll use this opportunity to finally be himself without fearing that these ppl will leave his as well. ‘For you, I would cross the line’ and then there’s the priceless loyalty towards those ppl that I've mentioned. Yeah, Romeo will do anything for the ppl he loves.

This Is Me Trying. It’s how I think Romeo in his low would look. I’ve mentioned before that his mental health sometimes hits very low that he can barely do anything. It looks more like everything that he does is so tiring and all he can do is just stay in bed. He wants someone to know that he’s trying his best to get up just to brush his teeth or get some food. He wants someone to know that he’s trying his best. As much as he wants to, he can’t get through a day like that all alone. He needs someone else to be the one telling him to do things because days like these are usually when Romeo can’t bare to listen to himself. A simple ‘I’m proud of you’ from someone else can be enough to get him to other things that seems difficult. But hey, he’s trying.

To quickly sum it up: Love story is how he views love to be (young, beautiful, yet stupid in the same way) and he proudly embraces it. Invisible String is how he believes in soulmates to cope with the disappointment he faces from ppl that don’t like his true colors. Wonderland is how he tends to get over excited when it comes to ppl that show any form of attention towards him that can be viewed as affection plus how he likes to pretend to be in a world where it’s okay for him to be clingy. Blank Space is how his passionate soul somehow turns him into a crazy person that can’t make a connection with others last. Lover is for how he feels/looks when Romeo does love. ...Ready For It is for how he leaves different kinds of marks on the people he had once connected in the past. Don’t Blame Me is for how the people he wants to connect to brings out his true colors and how he will thrive when the person he connects with is the right one. This Is Me Trying is how Romeo looks like when he’s in his lowest moment and needs someone to support him.

If this doesn’t make any sense then I’m sorry just ignore this pls:)

[selfindulgent-undertalerps]

Debug x Fell Part 1

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Next

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Debug went into Underfell, he looks around with curiosity.

Behind him, Debug hears "heh, you don't look like you're from around here."

Debug looks behind him to see the person talking, "Maybe and what about it?"

There's no one there. Fell appeared right in front of him while he was looking around. "dunno, what about it." He's leaning close wearing a sharp grin.

Debug took a few steps back, He's ready to protect himself.

"hah! you shoulda seen ya face." Fell chuckles "really though, what are ya doin here? lookin a little soft for this area."

He looks Debug up and down "tryna get another crack in ya skull?"

"just looking around" Debug' voice is glitching, he's looking at Fell.

"s'not the kinda place to be 'just lookin around' buddy." Fell does air quotes. "so ya got a actual reason, or are ya really that much of a numbskull?"

"No, I don't have an actual reason . . ." Debug' voice glitched a bit more, He's avoiding eye contact.

"well you're gonna get killed wanderin around lookin like free exp..." Fell sighs pinching the bridge of his nasal cavity. this guy looks too innocent for his own good " ok... ok, what was it ya wanted to see then? i'll accompany ya with your explorin and when you're good'n satisfied ya can get the fuck out, capiche?"

"I can go now if you don't want me here" Debug doesn't like when people treat him like a defenseless child, he's looking at Fell, Debug has 5 LV.

Fell shuffles his feet awkwardly "nah now i didn't say that." He chuckled

"personally don't mind visitors, just also don't mind visitors not dustin gettin their asses jumped. it happens 'round here, ya know?"

"I know" Debug slightly scratched himself near the crack in his skull.

Fell rubs the back of his head sheepishly "look i feel like we got off on the wrong foot... hows about a do-over?" He holds out his hand to shake.

"the names sans, sans the skeleton. though you probably know a couplea those huh?" He chuckles "most visitors call me red or fell... or that asshole. heh. take your pick."

Debug shook his hand a bit hesitantly "Ralz or to be specific Debug, nice to meet you Fell" He smiled a bit.

Fell grinned "nice to meetcha debug."

Fell looks around. "it still isn't the best idea to be standing around out in the open though. ya hungry by chance debug?"

"Hm . . . A bit . . ."

"i know a safe place ya can kick ya shoes off with good food that'll warm ya soul." Fell winks. "can head there if ya like?"

"Sure" said Debug with a small smile.

"k. let's take a shortcut though." Fell holds out his hand for Debug to take.

He took Fell' hand. The two blip into an an alleyway and Fell stuffs his hands in his pockets.

"k, just follow me and don't talk to no one. s'not like you're the first visitor here but i don't want no trouble." He jerks his head in the direction he wants Debug to follow and leads them out of the alleyway and to the front of Underfell's version of Grillby's, opening the door and stepping inside.

Debug walked behind him, he looked around.

There were only a couple monsters inside. just Lesser Dog and Greater Dog practicing poker at their usual spot and a rabbit monster passed out in a booth.

Fell seemed to relax a little and turned to Debug. "you want a table, booth or bar seat?"

"Booth"

"booth it is" Fell slips into a booth and nudges the standing menu towards Debug. "figure out what ya want before burning man gets over here."

Debug is looking at the menu.

Fell leans on the table and puts his head in his hand, his phalanges clack on the table loudly as he idly taps patterns. It doesn't take long for Grillby to come to their table with a notepad and pen in hand.

"heya hot head, i'll just be ordering my usual and whatever this guy wants." Fell gestures to Debug.

Debug placed his order, nothing special.

"so what's your story?" Fell stops tapping on the table and looks at Debug.

"Hm?"

"who are ya? where'd ya come from? i dunno, life goals? everybody always has somethin' goin' on."

"Hm . . . I come from an art based AU, to be specific from a timeline where the Underground collapsed, I was the only one to survive . . ." Debug' voice gradually became more sad.

Fell looks sympathetic "ouch." He hissed, wincing "that uhh.. that really sucks... sorry for askin'."

Fell gives Debug an appraising look "that uh, makes sense why you're just wanderin' au's."

"Yeah" Debug is looking at him.

"well welcome to underfell." Fell chuckles. "dunno why a cute little guy like you would wanna come here, place is a shithole."

Fell suddenly gets hit in the back of the head with a small poof of flame.

"oof! fuck! i wasn't talkin' 'bout you! ya oversized fuckin' pocket light." Fell mumbles the last half while rubbing the back of his head.

A small blush appeared on his cheekbones, Debug giggled when Fell got hit "Are you okay?"

Fell's face lights up "yeah, yeah, i'm fine."

Debug is smiling slightly.

Fell's tapping on the table again. "so an art au huh? what was that like? everyone go 'round drawin on shit all the time? if- oh eyy thanks."

Grillby served the two's orders up, Fell's usual was apparently a burg and three mustard bottles.

Grillby put a milkshake in front of Debug, signed "on the house" and gave Fell a warning glare before walking off.

"what!?" Fell called after him. He shook his head and turned back to Debug "what were we talking about?"

"My AU" Debug took a sip from the milkshake "It was nice, almost everyone was doing some kind of art, be it music, paintings, animation"

"that sounds it'd be fun." Fell says while dumping an entire bottle of mustard onto his burg, it's disgustingly messy. "was everyone good at everything or didja all have.." Fell paused trying to think of a word "specialties?"

"Specialities, I'm for example good at digital art, sewing and knitting, also cooking"

"so ya all did all the arts huh?" Fell takes a bite of his burg chewing and swallowing quickly. "that's sew cool."

Debug snickered at the pun.

"did ya knit that scarf yourself then?"

"Yeah"

"looks soft, can i feel it?" Fell's got a sly smirk on his face.

"Sure" Debug's looking at him.

Fell makes sure his hand's clear of mustard and reaches out to touch it.

"yep that's just as i suspected. s'made of top quality boyfriend material." Fell winks at Debug.

Debug' cheekbones are covered with a blush, his freckles barely visible because of it, he sips on his milkshake, he doesn't know what to say

Fell snickers "sorry don't mean to needle ya."

Debug giggled.

Fell takes a bite of his burg and squirts mustard directly into his mouth moaning in delight.

"gotta admit the hot head's a asshole sometimes but he sure knows how ta make fuckin mustard and burgs."

Debug is watching him, taking sips from his milkshake and eating his own food.

Fell all but inhaled the rest of his meal. sagging in his seat with satisfaction.

Debug soon finished his food too.

Fell glanced at the bar and back to Debug and leaned in close saying in a lowered voice

"hey ya ever dine and dashed before?" Fell grins "s'the only way i can get 'im to put it on my tab."

"Um . . . No . . . but I could try . . ."

"don't worry i do this all the time, we're friends, it's like our thing." He says shrugging with his eyes closed, the sweat on Fell's forehead however says otherwise.

"s'ok on my count you'd go for the door and i'll cover ya." He gives Debug a mischievous grin. "ya in? or nah? s'fine either way, no pressure."

"I don't know really . . . I don't want you to be in trouble . . . "

"nah i'd be fine. it seems it'd make ya too uncomfortable though." Fell sighs in defeat.

"alright guess we're playin it straight this time." Fell chuckles "can't say i play it straight that often." He says with a wink.

Fell then turns around and shouts at the bartender "yo grillbz! the check!"

Debug is looking at him.

"nevermind just keep the change!" Fell slaps some g on the table and turns to Debug "lets bounce." Fell stands offering a hand outta his seat to Debug.

"i think there's a couple places that'd be interesting to visit round here, ya gotta stick close to me though, not too many'll fuck with ya if i'm around."

"Okay" Debug took his hand.

[imaginariumrpc]

okay so the lovely @imbicilite​ / @whitrph​ and i were talking and it gave me the idea and we thought it was a great idea to spread it around so here’s how it goes: when talking with someone about pretty much anything tbh, but especially for something that could potentially be triggering, communicate with color codes based on city traffic lights ! GREEN means it’s good to talk about these things and you’re not feeling triggered by the topic, YELLOW means to slow down or stop talking about the topic at for now while RED means to stop the conversation about the topic immediately until green again where the conversation can divert into another topic or they feel safe to talk about it again !! this is EXTREMELY important, because it’s a way to alert others that you’re going to be talking about something that could possibly upset someone because of the subject matter, especially for those who may get triggered by a certain topic - even without you realizing it because squicks and triggers can honestly be anything, it could be different words or phrases or certain topics - and can cause severe anxiety in those affected, even panic attacks or flashbacks, and because we want to be considerate and respectful towards one another, it’s important that we use these to help our friends and fellow rpers know that we’re going to be posting or talking about something they might not want to see or talk about, and it’s of utmost importance to make them feel safe, it’s best to use this to be a more supportive friend and a member of the rpc!!

on a sidenote, i’m also here to tell you about tone indicators !! keep in mind that i didn’t come up with nor invent the concept of tone tags itself, but it was being spread around for a while now and i’d figured i’d talk about it !! essentially, tone indicators are used to indicate if the person is joking, being serious, etc., neurodivergent people often have trouble conveying and understanding emotion and tone through written text, using tone indicators is really helpful for neurodivergent people to make it easier for them to read/convey, it is also very helpful for people with anxiety. i encourage anyone who reads this to also type the meaning of the tone tag ( i.e: i love you !! /p for platonic ), so it is more accessible for neurodivergent and disabled people, like those who use screen readers.

“why should we use tone tags?” one might ask, but as an autistic, disabled and otherwise neurodivergent person myself, sometimes i don’t always get my friends and fellow mutual’s tones by their message but when they use tone indicators, it helps me understand and, not to mention that it can be really helpful and avoid misunderstandings. i would also like to note that NOT ALL neurodivergent people want you to use tone indicators on them, so if they don’t want you to use tone tags on them, please respect their wishes.

“i don’t like tone tags!” one might add, well, okay... but don’t make fun of the people that use them, it’s not a big deal, and if you’re a neurotypical who insists on not using tone tags when a neurodivergent person clearly asked you to, get your head out of your ass.

“using /j at the end of a joke ruins it!!” one might bitch, and okay but... it might be ruined for you, but it still makes me laugh, personally, so please try and get used to it, and not to mention, what’s more important: making sure you’re clear with your tone so that there’s no misunderstandings or throwing a fit just because the joke’s ruined for you?

additionally, some other things to keep in mind !! please do not mock the use of tone tags, you may not need them but some people do, not everyone can tell when something is a joke, when someone’s either being platonic, romantic or sexual in intentions, etc.,, especially when there’s no visual cues or tones of voice to help us, just be nice about it, it’s... really not hard, man. if you don’t use a tone tag and someone reads the tone of your statement incorrectly, do not get upset with them or laugh at them for not getting it - that is perpetuating ableism and/or sanism, whether you intentionally intend it or not. just kindly clarify and next time, keep in mind that tone tags are very helpful for neurodivergent, disabled and people with anxiety disorders. using a tone tag isn’t an excuse to be mean either, you can’t just say something mean or not cool and then put /j ( “joking” ) after it to get away with it, don’t be an ass. if you’re saying something that could be anxiety inducing for others, i would highly recommend putting the tone tags at not only the end but also the beginning of that post. do not intentionally use tone tags incorrectly “as a joke”, to confuse people, etc., the entire point of tone tags is to clarify, not confuse people, if you intentionally use them incorrectly, you’re an ass. keep in mind that no one has to use all the tone tags, use what you’d like, respect others who use what they would like, use them however feels rights to you. for me personally, sometimes i use multiple, sometimes only one, or sometimes none at all, just do what feels right, depending on who i’m talking to and how long i’ve known this person or group of people i’m speaking to, it’ll be fine, and if someone asks for clarification on what you mean, that’s okay, kindly clarify for them. additionally, please be patient if people don’t know what tone tags are, someone might not even be aware of what they are and that’s not their fault, just patiently explain it to them or link them to a source !! education always helps !! please don’t use “/srs or serious” as a joke, some neurodivergent and/or disabled people don’t need you to use three tone tags, and in my case, i’m presuming you’re neurotypical if you’re doing that when conversing with me, but what i’m trying to say is it looks like you’re babying us neurodivergents / disabled folx, so try to use only two tags ( that is, if that person is okay with it !! ), because some people don’t need you to use three tags.

please note that the following aren’t every single example out there and there are different terminologies in different languages, but they are important, a few examples of these are: 

“/j = joking / used when saying something in a joking manner, “so im pretty much the president of oreos /j”, 

“/hj = half joking / used when saying something that’s kind of a joke but kind of serious / “well,,,,, im usually right /hj” / 

“/s or /sarc / refers to the opposite of what you really want to say / “i just [clenches fists] love...... being sad..... /s”, 

“/srs / used when saying something you really mean / “i really appreciate you /srs””, 

“/nsrs = not serious / used when saying something not too seriously / “you’re the worst /nsrs”, 

“/lh = lighthearted = used when something’s said lightheartedly / “hEY LEAVE ME OUT OF THIS /lh” / i’d say something like this when me and my friends would get into a silly argument and they’re trying to ask my opinion on a topic”, 

“/ij = referring to something that’s only understood by people with special knowledge about something, typically only a small group of friends or a group of people would be aware of, those outside of the group would most likely be confused by it or not find it funny in the same way people within in the group would / “aAAAAAAAAA MY NUGGIES!!!!! /ij””, 

“/ref = a reference to media, usually movies, tv, music, etc., “yOU SHALL NOT PAAAAAAAASSSSSSS /ref”, 

“/t = teasing, use when teasing someone or provoking someone, often playfully, “aiight sure mx idk wtf im doin /t”, 

“nm = not mad, to indicate you’re not actually mad or upset about something / “ow... i felt that /nm”, 

“lu = a little upset / used when about about something or someone, but not too upset / “oh... that sucks /lu”, 

“/nbh = “nobody here” = often used when talking about something vague to ensure your friends it’s not indirectly to or about them / “sometimes i just wanna..... tell someone to shut the fuck up /nbh”, 

“/nay = not at you / used when saying something but not meaning it at the person you’re responding to / “god i can’t stand lame people /nay”, 

“/ay = “at you”, make the person aware you’re addressing them”, 

“/g or /gen = used when saying or asking something for real / “i’m proud of you /g” or “have you watched the news?? /gen”, 

“/th = threat, used when giving a genuine threat / “if you don’t stop, i’ll block you /th”, 

“/p = platonic, a friendship type of love, used when saying something with platonic intentions / “i love you /p”, 

“/r = romantic intentions, typically of partners when saying something with romantic intentions / “i love you /r””, 

“/a = alterous, an attraction best described as wanting emotional closeness without necessarily being at all or entirely platonic and/or romantic, used when saying with alterous intentions / “i love you /a””

“/m = metaphor / used when saying something metaphorically / “god you’re a shining star /m””

“/li = literal / used when saying something literally / “i hate pears /li””

“/rh = rhetorical / a question asked in order to create a dramatic effect or to make a point rather than to get an answer / used when saying or asking something rhetorically / “who cares? /rh””

“/hyp = hyperbole, exaggerated statements or claims not meant to be taken literally ; “i have a million things to do today”

“/sx = sexual intent, used when meaning something in a sexual way”, 

“/nsx = nonsexual intent, used when meaning something in a not sexual way”, 

“/pos = positive / used when saying something and meaning it in a positive way / “omg im gonna cry /pos”, implied they’re crying for a happy reason”, 

“/neg = negative / used when saying something and meaning it in a negative way / “omg im gonna cry /neg”, implied they’re crying for an upsetting reason”, and 

“/neu = neutral / used to show that what you’re saying is neutral or that you feel indifferent about it / “yeah i don’t care man do what you want /neu”, you don’t care about something but not in a mean or a negative way, you’re just indifferent”.

on a final note, HERE is a list of tone tags both in english and in other languages ( namely italian, spanish, portuguese, french, polish, german, lithuanian, serbian, dutch, indonesian, romanian, bulgarian, russian, hebrew, japanese, mandarin and korean !! ) and HERE are the list of sources about the content of tone tags !! i wish everyone reading this a lovely day !!

[official-lovestruck-galen]

Lucas Season Finale Thoughts (Episode 12)

Here we go boys. I’m incredibly excited and also slightly scared.

OH HELL YEAH he’s too cool and popular to be kicked out. Good.

owo it seems she’s fine with a challenge. Hell yea. I never did get the Student Body Always Votes For Notorious Mean Girl thing, even if they change for the sake of Votes. We’ll see how it plays out though!

Lucas is a genius but I’m also slightly worried about Encountering The Warlock. Each day it grows closer I fear it more.

Idk I’d like to be Lucas and the Sidekicks. Just me?

YES!!! BE HAPPY MMC LET YOURSELF BE HAPPYYYYYYYY!!!!!

(Seeing him happy is the biggest victory of all.) Awwwww. That’s gaayyyyy.

Sugar Rush Lucas sounds incredibly exhausting and adorable.

I mean I certainly expect Lucas to be a good leader but it’s still very good to see!!!

Oooooo now it’s not even just FMC calling MMC out on his gay, Nora is too. Her route wasn’t quite as Attention Grabbing as Lucas has been, but I still love her.

Everyone’s giving MMC the same advice. Be honest my boy!!!!! Listen to the girls they hold the emotional brain cells right now.

GOD I love Nora. She’s just layin it all out there. And honestly, it’s probably good for MMC to hear it from her since she’s usually the more logical, so MMC might actually listen to her.

YES YOU FOOL HE WANTS TO PROTECT YOU!!!! YOU WERE THE FIRST THING HE THOUGHT OF WHEN DARLA TRIED TO THREATEN YALL I MENTIONED IT ALREADY!!! DONT YOU SEEEE??? HE LOVES YOUUUUU!!!!!!

GOD, ALL THE AGONIZING OVER PLANS WAS JUST SO HE COULD SECURE MMC’S SAFETY AND MAKE SURE HE DIDNT FACE ANY NEGATIVE CONSEQUENCES,,,,, THATS SO GOOD,,,, I LOVE HIM,,,, HE LOVES MMC SO MUUUUCH,,,

Nora thank god you’re here. You’re saying all the things that must be said. He’d give anything for MMC’S safety,,,, I know I said at one point that I wanted to see Lucas making more Active Decisions for MMC and listen this is iiiiit!!!! While MMC has been trying to help Lucas all this time Lucas agonized and worked and planned to do the same for MMC,,,, that’s the best shit in the world. It kinda makes me wonder,,,, how much stuff about Lucas I could’ve missed because of MMCs view and how he doesn’t think anyone would love him like that,,,,, WELL THATS FOR THE EVENTUAL, INEVITABLE SEASON REPLAY.

I’m sobbing I need hEARTS

Part of me is Upset that MMC is so determined to twist things in a way that makes himself into Lucas’s burden but,,,, it’s also the realest thing. Like I do that constantly and it’s often Unreasonable. And it’s just super Real and Sad to watch from the outside of it, especially since it’s not exactly Unexpected. It totally lines up with MMC’S general self-deprecation and his attempts to protect himself from Heartbreak. While I definitely sympathize and feel bad for other MCs at times(notably RP MC who deal with so much bullshit), I’m just really empathizing with this one the whole way through. And despite the Fantastical nature of the story his personal struggles are so Real and UUUUGH. I just can’t give enough props to the writers of this route and MMC. I love it so much. This MC just needs. A hug.

I’m legit about to cry at this shit like for real. Lucas is so,,,, encouraging. And it’s just so clear that it isn’t empty or meaningless encouragement it’s all completely true.

Is it happenin?? Is he doin it???? Is he gonna express??? The feelings??????

IM SOBBING,,,, IM SOBBING AT THIS SWEET BEAUTIFUL SHIT,,,, HIS LIGHTKEEPER,,,,, I AM CRYING IN REAL LIFE THAT IS NOT EVEN AN EXAGGERATION I LOVE THEM SO MUCH

It’s so slow,,,, so much buildup,,, And it’s so beautiful

THE KISS,,,,,,, I AM LOSING MY MIND I LOVE THIS SO MUCH

I am honestly genuinely filled with so many emotions. The writing was beautiful. The ending was beautiful. All my hopes and dreams have come true. AND THAT CLIFFHANGER THOUGH,,,, I’m just. So happy with this route and this relationship. Imma probably do a bit of a General Lucas Season 1 Overview soon but for now. I’m just gonna eat lunch and cry tears of joy.

[faunusrights]

OFFAL HUNT REMASTERED LIVEBLOG // CHAPTER 21

IN THIS EPISODE OF MURPHY IS SO VERY SLEEPY BUT THE UPDATE SCHEDULE TAKES NO PRISONERS (FOR THE MOMENT):

“So it’s true,” she wheezed between grit fangs—“that bitch really does have you on a leash.”

KINKY,

me: okay lemme refresh on what happened last chapter-- me: /remembers me: oh yeah! yeah that SUCKED,

lets us continue on the journey of deep and immense sadness with glynda ‘clown shoes’ goodwitch!!!!!!!! here we go here we go

It took a while to pry back the jaws of her soul and wrench herself out of them.

ooh i rly like the context change here. before glynda was kinda falling back into her soul as a way of just Getting On With Shit or protecting herself, but now it’s framed in a fun new way of please can i get out of here now. good job glynda. look at u GROUNDING YRSELF like a CHAMP who should have been in a TKO LIKE FIVE ROUNDS AGO--

What did that mean? Had she asked Cinder about Ochre? Glynda struggled to recall, but the memories swirled like clouded ink in her skull.

i still love the continuation of glynda’s Mysterious Messages To Herself. she leads such a thrilling life of ‘did i write that’ and ‘did i do that’ and ‘what does any of this mean’

Hating herself, Glynda found she couldn’t remember.

and also a less thrilling life of the squeaky clown shoes variety. glynda PLEASE

She had to know: was anything Cinder had given her real?

the YOU and the US,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, the DESTINY. dw babe im sure cinder Has Never Told A Lie, Even Once In Her Life, On Account Of Being A Very Open And Honest Person,

Had she been abandoned? Cinder had been unhappy when she left. Angry, maybe. Angry enough to take her leave for good? Or had she always planned to?

i love watching glynda slowly become kind of,,,,,,,,,,,, more aware of herself in relation to other people? sometimes she still Moves or Does w/o rly thinking it thru, but we’ve got quite a change from, like, early chapters of glynda where she was barrelling along with VERY little disregard for both actions AND consequences,,, but look at her now!!!!!!! using her whole ass BRAIN. im proud of her. 

When she tried to dismiss this first fear, another one was waiting underneath: had something happened to Cinder?

In her attempts to keep Glynda’s soul from smothering them both, Cinder had been quite willing to converse over the phone with her—even if her texts were short and snippy, she usually at least responded, to avoid backlash. Did she not care anymore? Or—

Or was she unable to?

/leans in, like, uncomfortably close to the microphone

glynda darling i do Not mean 2 worry u but yr (future) gf is currently grieving, pissed beyond belief, and also

/checks notes

failing her way into becoming strawberry jam

But, surprisingly, there was another half to Glynda now: one that worried, despite facts, that Cinder was in danger. That Cinder might need her.

GO AND GET THE GIRL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The light caught in every golden thread of her crown emblem, embroidered with diligent precision. But something else caught her eye: the midnight black surrounding it had a sheen to it. Subtle red ducked through the fabric, glittering like burnished stars in a distant night sky: fire Dust.

The flash of a memory: Cinder’s face when Glynda had complained that her last cape had been burned.

This cape would not burn.

okay so no lie i cant read this bit without my eyes starting to water abt just how GOOD this section is and i have cried TOO MANY TIMES over this fic ALREADY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! but GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! T H A N K Y O U F O R T H E F O O D !

CINDER MADE IT FIREPROOF. SHE DIDNT HAVE TO. SHE DIDNT NEED TO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BUT THE SYMBOLISM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IS U N R E A L. I AM CRYING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

GO GET THE GIRL YOU MORON

Glynda didn’t know what to do.

Glynda dialed Winter.

and i am INSTANTLY launched back into the comedy that is glynda goodwitch’s life at large THANKS FOR THE WHIPLASH

“No, I mean… I was awful to you the last time we spoke. I know I was. I keep thinking about it. I’m so sorry, I just… Don’t have anyone else to go to right now. I don’t know who else I’d call.” It was horrible to admit. Loneliness had never shamed her before because her soul had held it at bay. Now it made her sick. “I’m safe. If you don’t want to talk to me…”

LOOK AT THIS CHARACTER GROWTH,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, GLYNDA!!!!!!!! YR DOIN SO WELL BABY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! EVERYONE COME LOOK AT HER THINKING WITH HER M I N D.

“I lashed out at you, Professor Goodwitch. That wasn’t right of me. I should have known that you weren’t truly to blame for what you said. I know Cinder. She’s manipulative. She twists the world and makes you think she’s a different person than who she really is. I blamed you in the moment, but Cinder Fall is truly the person at fault for making you believe that I would try to hurt you. I shouldn’t have raised my voice or said the things I did.”

/rubs face

like winter needs to be in this fic and og was bereft not having her actually take up 30% of the space as she DESERVES, but god i forgot that shes a whole Thing and winter please just. shush. for a moment. for a second. ilusm. but please shut up.

Glynda was pacing, her Scroll levitating near her.

side note but casual uses of glyndas semblance is one of my fav things i love seeing it. glynda ‘look mom no hands’ goodwitch out here,

Glynda closed her eyes. The tactile recollection of cats arching, bristling, and spitting. Backed into corners. “Maybe she was panicking. I don’t know.”

i dont rly have much to say here other than continuing to enjoy Cinder As Cat, the ongoing metaphor. glyndas just gonna pick her up the scruff of the neck eventually and we will ALL b thankful.

ughghghgb im not gonna copy paste this whole convo w/ winter because this is a liveblog not a shitty projection of the fic on the side wall of a bowling alley, BUT GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD glynda is so WORRIED,,,,,,,,,,, past glynda is befuddled. bemused. why does future glynda Feel so much. but future glynda is FEELING and i love her. das yr gf yr worried abt. DAS HER,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, and also yr other gf winter too but like that’s a long-con sort of egg to hatch,

While it had been some time now since Glynda had been in a proper fight, she expected no trouble. This wasn’t Cinder—ergo: this wasn’t a real threat to her. Still, she would bide her time and hold her silence, if only for the chance of getting a hint of what was going on.

This wasn’t Cinder—ergo: this wasn’t a real threat to her.

LADS,,,, LADIES,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, BEANS,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, IS IT GAY,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, TO SEE YR RIVAL AS YR ONLY REAL THREAT,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

The group crossed the room as one unit, guns aloft and eyes peeled, determined to not be ambushed.

Glynda intended to ambush them regardless.

i dont like 2 say when an au gets a character so right that all other interpretations aren’t valid, but.......................... offal hunt gets glynda so right that all other interpretations aren’t valid, and thats that, on that,

One left. Glynda didn’t hesitate. She had been built to fight Grimm; far stronger, far quicker, far more bestial foes than these. She was herself a blade, sharpened far too fine for these intruders.

sounds hot

“Are they...alive?”

Glynda didn’t pause to check.

“Professor? Are they alive?”

glynda: fuck them kids

“How will you get to her?” Winter asked.

“I always find her in the end,” Glynda answered.

hrm,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, i wonder if that’s foreshadowing something

Her soul was churning inside her, longing for solace, for Cinder. She could picture the way like a burning trail in her mind’s eye; that bright-yellow tether between herself and Cinder, that pathway between their souls that she had tread so many times before. It always led her to Cinder.

HRM,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, I WONDER,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

“Good luck, Glynda.”

“Thank you,” she said again, pausing under the streetlights. “But I won’t need luck. I’ll find her.”

FELLAS,

what a good chapter!!!!!!!!!!! also i cried. BUT I HAD A REAL GOOD TIME. I CAN IMAGINE THE NEXT CHAPTER WILL BE LESS OF A GOOD TIME, BUT FOR NOW, I WILL ENJOY THE MENTAL IMAGE OF GLYNDA’S BICEPS AND HER FUTURE WEDDING ALSO,

[vanchlo]

PLS DO ALL CUDDLY ASKS FOR MY PARENTS HECKY

IM LAUGHING SO HARD I LOVE YOU SO MUCH THANK YOUUUUUU THIS IS AWESOME LETS GOOOOOOOOOOO- WAIT LEMME GO TURN ON MY HECKY PLAYLIST FOR THIS

*

I’m answering these questions from the POV’s from the main characters in my lawyer!harry story, The Assistant! I’ll just, um, answer some of these from an future alternate universe where Becks and Harry are together ;) if you know what I mean.

*KINDA???? CONTAINS SOME SPOILERS BELOW??????*

1. In the morning, who is more likely to trap the other in bed by cuddling them?

- I am most definitely the one who traps the other in bed with cuddles, because Harry is always “up and at ‘em” right away in the morning. That’s probably because he’s been waking up at the ass crack of dawn for well, forever and is so used to it, when I’m not. I’m not a big morning person, so I like to lay in bed as long as I can, and extra cuddles makes it even better. I may or may not make Harry crabby weekly by making us late to work with some morning cuddles. When we wake up, he’ll give in “for a quick cuddle” he calls it, but it always turns into like a fifteen minute one, hehehehe. Every once in a while Harry will do it, though, and it makes me melt every time. - Becks

- Oh, Becks, fo’ sure. She’s always draggin’ tha mornin’ on by wrestlin’ me t’ have some cuddles with her befo’ we leave. Often- too often, it makes us late fer work, but lookin’ back on it, I really wouldn’t have it any otha way. I get upset with her sumtimes ‘bout it coz ‘m tryna be a betta boss at the firm, but I do love ‘em mo’ than I let on. - Harry

2. How do each of you ask for a hug or cuddles?

- Um, I guess I just outright ask for it, or sometimes I don’t ask and just do it. I used to ask for either of them more, but I don’t much anymore, unless the situation warrants it, like if Harry is crabby or busy with something. When I’m upset about something and need one, I never ask. - Becks

- I reckon I don’t really ask fo’ eitha, and neitha does Becks. Ratha, we both jus’ take what we want, and when we want it. Sumtimes we may ask tha otha, if they’re inna bad mood or sumthin’. Actually, I s’pose sumtimes we ask tha otha silently with a look on our face, holdin’ our arms out fer tha otha like I do fer her, or jus’ givin’ tha otha a hug or cuddle when we know tha otha needs it. - Harry

3. Do you ever just casually lay on each other? Whether it be flopping down in each other’s laps or leaning your heads on each other’s shoulders.

- This one made me laugh. Yeah, I’d say this happens a lot when one of us is sitting on a sofa or in bed, and I’m often the one who will fall onto his lap. There may have been a few times, at the beginning, that I missed and nailed his balls. I felt so bad, but luckily I’ve gotten better at it, and I don’t give him a near heart attack when I fall onto his lap anymore. Otherwise, it happens a lot when we’re watching tv together, and if we’re working together on one of our sofas at the firm. Don’t even get me started on how much I love the “heads on each other’s shoulders” thing and how he always does it. Ugh. - Becks

- Becks ‘s defo’ mo’ guilty o’ this than I am. I dunno what it ‘s, but she loves t’ do this. So much so, that ‘ve developed a habit o’ coverin’ me balls when I see her comin’. She fo’gets it, but she likes t’ sprawl out and lay her head on me lap when we’re watchin’ sumthin’. This girl has a bad thing ‘bout havin’ her hair played with, and she often does it befo’ bed, and she’s out like a light within minutes o’ me startin’. I think tha layin’ on eachotha’s laps ‘s defo’ a given if eitha o’ us ‘s havin’ a bad day. We do tha head on shoulders thing often when we’re workin’ next t’ each otha, or while watchin’ telly. From tha beginnin’ we’ve had this thing ‘bout always touchin’, think it makes tha both o’ us feel safe. - Harry

4. Who’s the big spoon and who’s the little spoon? Do you ever switch?

- Harry has a good half of a foot on me, so he’s always the big spoon! Wait, I am the big spoon sometimes, but really only when he’s upset. It doesn’t happen often, just then or when we wake up and his back is to me. He’s really good at being the big spoon, though, so it works out well. - Becks

- ‘m ninety percent o’ tha time tha big spoon, and Becks ‘s tha li’l spoon. She only comes past me shouldas a li’l bit, so tha position o’ big spoon was given t’ me at tha beginnin’. I reckon she does steal it from me time t’ time when she’s feelin’ brave, or when I need t’ be tha li’l spoon if ‘m sad. I like bein’ tha big spoon in tha mornin’ wakin’ her up, and sumtimes she gets tha same idea. - Harry

5. Can you describe how you usually cuddle?

- Hmmmmm. It’s usually when we’re watching something, or if we’re in one of our offices at work and we’re working on something next to each other. I guess it typically looks something like having my head on his shoulder and his arm around me. Then again, sometimes it may be simple as intertwining our legs and having our bodies touching, like if we’re typing away on our laptops next to each other. One of our heads will wander to the other’s shoulder, and or we’ll play a little footsie. If it gets more cuddly than that, it’s arms around the other spooning under some blankets, it may look like lying down with my head on his chest and arms around each other, or as simple as facing each other with our arms around the other and my face often in his chest or neck. - Becks

- I reckon it depends where we’re at and what we’re doin’. If we’re at tha firm workin’ t’getha, which we often are, and we’re sat next t’ each otha, then we might be playin’ footsie or jus’ be sittin’ right beside tha otha. If ‘s at home, a head may be on tha otha’s shoulda, ya’d be a winna if ya bet her head ‘s on my lap and my hand in her hair, a good spoonin’ cuddle, or like I said she’s bundled up in me lap with her head ‘gainst me chest and my arms surroundin’ her. - Harry

6. How touchy-feely are you with each other in public?

- It depends. If we’re at work, it looks different if we’re in one of our offices or not. If we’re not in our offices, say for a team meeting, at the courts arguing a case, or just talking to coworkers, we very rarely touch each other. We keep it professional at work and act like colleagues and or mentor and mentee. That’s what works best for us, and our team at Harry’s firm. But if it’s somewhere else, like the shops or a restaurant, we like to hold hands, hug, have Harry’s arm around me, and a kiss or two; keep it tame. All of that happens at the firm too, just behind closed doors where it’s just us. - Becks

- Again, it depends on tha place. If we’re at tha firm in eitha o’ our offices, anythin’ goes. If we’re outside o’ our offices for whateva reason, we’re colleagues first, and so we don’t touch save fer tha occasional hug maybe. All touchin’ ‘s defo’ off-limits at tha courts when we’re tryin’ a case, due t’ tha utmost importance o’ professionalism there. A pat on tha back may happen, but that’s as far as it goes. Tha team at tha firm ‘s great and doesn’t mind us datin’, but work ‘s work. If we’re sumwhere else in public anythin’ ‘s fine, but we don’t get very crazy save fer a kiss or hug.

7. Do either of you fall asleep often when cuddling? Who does it more?

- Oh, yes. I’m so guilty of this. I do this all of the time! Harry teases me about it, but there’s always been something so calming about being in his arms, and when there’s a sofa or bed involved, I’m almost guaranteed to fall asleep. It’s pretty much how I fall asleep every night, I’m so spoiled. - Becks

- Becks, e’ry bloody time. I love it, tho’, and find it so damn cute. ‘s tha way she falls asleep almost e’ry night. ‘s tha playin’ with her hair thing, I swear. She’s a spoiled brat gettin’ her hair played with e’ry night, but that’s ‘kay, coz ‘d hate not gettin’ t’ cuddle her t’ sleep e’ry night. When I happen t’ be away on a case that she can’t come with me fer, I always sleep terrible without her there cuddlin’ me t’ sleep. I may do it now and then, but ‘s mostly a Becks thing. - Harry

8. Are you the kind of couple to hold each other when one of you is scared, stressed, or sad? If not, how do you reassure each other?

- Yes, definitely! I think that’s been our thing from the very beginning, and I love it that way. We both communicate a lot through touch, and need it from the other, so that speaks to it. I’ve always had this thing where if I’m feeling any of those emotions badly enough that the sure fix is a hug from Harry, because they can fix anything. It’s more of a me thing than him, I’d say. We use words of affirmation and the like a lot for reassuring the other, we both need that, too. - Becks

- Fook ya, we are. ‘s jus’ always been that way. We’ve always been huggers with each otha, even in tha beginnin’ when she hadn’t made me into a softie, yet. We both crave it and need it from tha otha when we’re upset, and it always makes it betta. Othawise, I reckon talkin’ t’ eachotha when touch isn’t feasible ‘s a big thing we use fer reassurance as well, or acts o’ kindness, so t’ speak. - Harry

9. When you’re in bed at night, do you fall asleep in each other’s arms or keep your distance?

- Good question, I can’t always tell because I fall asleep once Harry starts playing with my hair. I think it’s mostly in the other’s arms, but sometimes we’re apart and we’re fine with that. Sometimes, one of us gets home late from work or from a night out, and we may or may not find our way into the other’s arms. I know there are some times when I just don’t want to cuddle, and other times when I won’t take no for an answer, hehe. - Becks

- Mostly in tha otha’s arms, coz duh, Becks ‘s spoiled. No, ‘m only kiddin’, a li’l. Like many o’ these questions, it depends. If ‘m workin’ late, she’s at Skye’s late, or jus’ one o’ us falls asleep early which doesn’t happen often, we don’t always wake tha otha t’ cuddle. I usually can’t pry her off me afta lullin’ her t’ sleep playin’ with her hair- No, ‘m kiddin’ ‘gain. I love fallin’ asleep with her in my arms, or usually with her head on me chest, and ‘m so happy that I get t’ fall asleep most nights with my arms ‘round her where she’s cuddled up t’ me. ‘d waited fer it too bloody long all those years. - Harry

[destiel-love-forever]

Coda 14x18

I fixed it <3 

(#obviously spoilers if you haven’t watched)

Read on AO3: Coda 14x18

At some point during the burning of Mary's body, Dean stormed off to the impala and left. With a silent look, Sam went after him and Castiel stayed, seeing that the hunter's funeral was finished properly. He stood there for hours. Part of him knew he was using it as an excuse to stay away from Dean. To put off the impending heart break. He has to go home eventually though.

Home. Can he call it that anymore? Dean is his home. But the man's voice echoes in his head “You're dead to me.”

You're dead to me.

You're dead to me.

You're dead to me.

It's late when Castiel gets ho- to the bunker. The place is deathly quiet, a strange absence of noise considering the state of the place. Chairs are broken. Lamps. A bottle of whiskey lays broken on the floor, a splatter of the liquid on the wall above where it now rests, shattered in a puddle on the floor.

That's how Castiel finds Dean. Shattered. In a puddle on the floor. Cradling a new bottle of whiskey to his chest. It looks like he tried making it to his bedroom but gave up halfway down the hall. He lays broken. Not crying. Not angry. Just staring off into the distance with a blank expression.

Not bothering with words, Castiel walks to the man and picks him up. Dean doesn't even argue as he's carried bridal style to his room. That's how Castiel knows this is bad. Very bad.

He places Dean on the edge of his bed, hovering his hands inches away in case the man falls over. When he decides that Dean is stable, he reaches down to take the whiskey.

Green eyes snap up, focusing for the first time. “No.”

“Dean. You need rest.” They fight over it like children until Castiel pauses the tug of war, the two of them holding it at once, holding hands at the same time, whiskey suspended in the air. “I won't take it away. I'll just put it on the bedside table. Right here. Nice and safe. Okay?”

“Safe,” Dean echoes in a whisper.

“Yes. Safe. You can grab it and take a drink whenever you need. Okay?”

“Safe.” Dean's eyes lock onto him again. This time, it feels like he's telling Castiel instead of asking. But what? What's safe? Dean is safe? Because Castiel is here? Or Castiel is safe? Because Dean doesn't hate him like he said?

You're dead to me.

You're dead to me

You're dead-

“Cas,” Dean starts.

“Yes?”

“You saw her?”

Castiel gets down on a knee to look Dean in the eye. “I did. Her and your father.”

“What-” he pauses, sniffing and wiping away a few tears. “What were they doin’?”

“They were watching the sunset. Sitting on the porch swing of a house overlooking the lake.”

“Were we there?”

“No.”

Dean drops his head, looking at his lap. “Oh.”

Unable to stop himself, Castiel adds, “Sam and Jess live in the city nearby with their three little ones. He got his law degree. He uses it for social activism. They visit at least once a week.”

Still not looking at Castiel, Dean huffs a laugh. “And let me guess? I'm some alcoholic no one acknowledges? Black sheep? Maybe come home for a holiday now and then just to fuck it up.”

“No, Dean. You are happy in their world. You live a life that, in Mary's mind, would make you happiest.”

Dean looks at him, nibbling on his bottom lip. “What is it?”

“What?” Castiel asks, even though he knows what Dean is asking. He's terrified to tell Dean what he saw. He thinks maybe he should lie. It feels like a betrayal to lie, though. A betrayal to who, Castiel doesn't know, but a betrayal nonetheless.

“What's my life like there?” There's so much vulnerability im Dean's eyes. It takes Castile's breath away, and he knows he doesn't stand a chance. Of course he will tell Dean. Even if it changes nothing. Even if he still breaks his heart after.

You're dead to me.

“Happy,” Castiel chokes out. He clears his throat and clarifies. “You went to college. Got a degree in criminal justice. You're a detective. A very good one. You live in a beautiful home just a few blocks from Sam. Your kids are best friends with his. You're - you - you're married. Happily married.”

“To who?”

Castiel forces himself to maintain eye contact. “Me, Dean. You and I are married.”

The shock he expected doesn't come. Instead, Dean's lips tilt up in a ghost of a smile. “And we have kids?”

“Yes. A little boy that looks just like you, but with even more freckles. And a little girl with my black curly hair and blue eyes.”

“They're biologically ours?”

“Yes. I'm human. So we can grow old together. We used a surrogate. First your sperm. Then the next one mine.”

Dean's lips part in a breath. “I bet they were beautiful.”

“Yes. They were.”

“Very unrealistic though.”

The subtle hope that had been swirling inside Castiel sparks and fizzles out. He swallows around the lump in his throat, looking away quickly so Dean can't see him blinking to try and fight the tears.

You're dead to me.

“I would never go to college,” Dean says with laughter in his voice. “Plus, I'm too old for that shit. And with two rugrats running around? No way. I'd be exhausted. Especially if they have our DNA. I think I'd own an auto shop. Like Bobby's. I always felt at peace when I was workin’ on cars.”

“Wait.” Castiel snaps his eyes to Dean. When he blinks, a tear slips down his cheek. “It's unrealistic because you wouldn't go to college?”

“Yeah.” Dean reaches out a shaky hand, touching Castiel's face with just his fingertips, almost like he's checking to make sure he's still real. “The rest is nice, though. The rest we keep.”

Castiel leans into the touch and holds his breath. It only takes a second before the sadness returns, making Dean pull his hand away and slump his shoulders. “There's no sorrow. There's no guilt. Just joy.”

“What?” Castiel asks.

“That's what you told me and Sam about my mom's heaven. There's no sorrow. There's no guilt. Just joy.”

“Yes.”

Dean nods, his eyes going blank like when Castiel first saw him. “Maybe I should die. Maybe it'd be better. I'd like a life like that. I want that life. Not this one.”

“Oh, Dean.” Castiel scoots closer. “That life isn't real.”

“But it's better.”

“Dean-”

“I can't do this anymore, Cas. I can't live this life. I can't handle the sorrow anymore. I can't handle the guilt.” Dean gives him a broken smile. “Like today. The things I said to you. That was unacceptable. That's not how you deserve to be treated.”

“It's fine, Dean. You were-”

“No,” Dean nearly growls. “No. It's not okay. I'm not okay. And the way I treat you. The way I'm always treating you? Not. Okay.”

Castiel nods. “You're right. It's not okay. It needs to stop.”

“It will. I swear. I'll be better.” Dean’s eyes meet Castiel's. They're watery and red. “We could go. We could be in that world instead. Together. I'd probably be a shitty husband and a shitty father, but I'll try, Cas. I'll try really fucking hard.”

“No, Dean. We are staying here. Alive. In the real world.”

“I don't like this world anymore.” Dean closes his eyes, a tear slipping down his freckled cheek. “I'm not sure I ever did.”

Castiel stands up. He shrugs out of his coat. Then kicks off his shoes. He removes Dean's flannel. The man keeps his eyes closed, just letting Castiel do what he wants. It isn't until they're beneath the covers, Castiel holding Dean tight to his chest, that Dean finally opens them again. He blinks, finding himself nose to nose with Castiel. When he breathes in, he breathes in the angel. He wants to hold it inside himself forever. Even if his lungs burst.

“We'll build that life here, Dean. You'll see. We can be happy. Even with sorrow and guilt, we can be happy.”

“Happy,” Dean whispers. It sounds like a request.

“Happy,” Castiel replies. It sounds like a promise. “I swear to you Dean Winchester. I'll give you your auto shop. I'll give you those beautiful children. I'll give you anything I possibly can.”

“Me too, Cas. I'll give you everything. I'm tired of feeling like this. I'm tired of keeping it all bottled up. It's not fair to you.” Dean rubs their noses together. “I'm sorry for today.”

“I know.”

“You could never be dead to me. Even when we lost you, even when you were physically dead, I still saw you everywhere. I still longed for you. Missed you. Needed you. Dreamt of you.”

Castiel releases a shaky breath. It's everything he's ever wanted to hear. He's terrified. And thrilled. He's shocked. And happy.

He's happy.

“I love you,” Castiel whispers against his lips, pushing thoughts of the darkness away.

Dean presses closer, planting a kiss without actually kissing him. “I love you, too,” he says against his mouth.

He pulls away only to lean back in and kiss Castiel again. They kiss until they forget everything but themselves. Then they fall asleep tangled together. In the morning, they'll begin to rebuild. This time, they'll do it right.

[shikai-the-storyteller]

I wasn’t planning to liveblog this episode because it’s One AM In The Morning but JEEZ

SU Future Episode 5

"Steven you've literally invited all problematic gems from across the universe to come here and learn a better way of living"

“Steven those are MY drawings!” AW OH NO........

HE CUT HIS HAIR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

“Oh my baby!” ME TOO GREG

“Father, go inside” SHOOT THAT GAVE ME SHIVERS, STEVEN’S ABOUT TO MURDER SOMEONE

Oh good our sweet darling Steven is back. But at the same time maybe don’t give them advice on how to fuse Stevo

“Are you kidding me” SAME

Oh my gosh I JUST got it, “Bluebird” like “Bluebeard” so they have a pirate sword

OH SHOOT ALEXANDRITE JUST SHOWED UP 

“I love how you believe in everyone” Greg you’re such a good father :’)

POOR GREG’S HAIR.....

Episode 6

OMG RAINBOW QUARTZ??? RAINBOW QUARTZ????? WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE

still creepy as ever I see, Onion

Is that a doll of Steven in his room

OMG THE FIRST NEW SONG OF THE SEASON

RAINBOW DON’T GIVE HIM YOUR UMBRELLA......

SUNSTONE GEMINAR??????

GARNET NO

“Never Leave” HORRIFYING

GARNET STOP!!!!!!!!!!!!!

“You slip on the stairs. You shatter on impact” GARNET!!!!!!!!

“Steven. Help. I think I’m scaring them.” I WOULD DIE FOR YOU GARNET

“Watch out Sunstone, it’s dangerous in here!” CUTE........

I LOVE SUNSTONE

Man I didn’t realize how badly I needed Steven Universe Future. Steven’s constantly stressing out and having anxiety stuff and I’m like *gestures frantically at the screen* Same hat!!! Same hat!!!!

Rainbow Quartz babysitting Onion is me babysitting my cousins, I’m cryin

“You know what’s also cool? RESPECT” I LOVE YOU SUNSTONE

aw the heaven and earth beetles carrying their skateboard :’D

LMAO “IT”S GETTING REALLY WEIRD HERE”

PEARL IM FRICKIN SOBBING

PEARL DONT PULL YOUR WEAPON ON A CHILD PLEASE

AW.......ONION...........

“Steven is cool too” SOBS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh NO

“I’m combining all my responsibilities into one. It’s brilliant. It’s fine. I’m fine. Really I’m fine.” GOSH SAME FRICKIN HAT STEVEN!!!!!!!!!!! BOY SOMEONE NEEDS TO GET YOU INTO THERAPY

THEY FRICKIN RAN OFF A CLIFF

“ I JUST MISS YOU MAN, I HAVEN”T SEEN YOU IN LIKE 11 MINUTES” SAME STEVEN

I can literally hear Sunstone saying “Why are you awake right now” SUNSTONE PLEASE DONT MAKE A CALLOUT POST @ ME IM DOIN MY BEST OUT HERE

This feels like the end of a Sailor Moon dubbed episode and I Love It

“It’s cool to want to help people, but it’s also cool to just say you’re too busy” FRICK THIS REALLY IS A CALLOUT POST @ ME

“Who are you talking to--OW” Pearl I love you

GOSH THIS WAS SUCH A GOOD EPISODE

B’)

Episode 7

Oh what’s 20 more minutes, I’ve already botched my sleep schedule so far

SNOW!!!!!!!!!!!!

Me 2 Steven

CHEESEBURGER BACKPACK!!!

aw.....he doesn’t use it anymore :’(

Gosh seeing Steven like this makes me so sad but it also feels very relatable

“SURPRISE! We were sitting in the dark!”

“I’ve been a vegetarian for like, a month” STEVEN.....

“I was sure we were in the pepperoni timeline” pfft

NO TOGETHER BREAKFAST......

LMAO ALL THAT SNOW

I just noticed Rose’s broken sword is on display

“Maaaaaan you had a better work-life balance when the Diamonds were trying to destroy the planet” oof

“Classic Steven” omg

Garnet Steven makes me so happy

OMG GARNET GOT HER

“HA JOKES ON YOU! PEARL DOESN”T SHAPESHIFT”

OH MY GOSH SHE ACTUALLY SHAPESHIFTED!

Aw they’re all so proud of Pearl :’) and they wanna help Steven

Can I get an F in the chat for Steven

“Steven no! I just folded those!” Poor Pearl

SUGILITE STEVEN!!!!!!!!!!!! OMG OMG

SARDONYX STEVEN!!!!

OPAL STEVEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

ULTIMATE STEVEN-TAG GAME!!!!!!!

IM FRICKIN SOBBING AT ALEXANDRITE

RUBY AND SAPPHIRE STEVEN!!!!!!

“Is this the end of my adult life” LMAO

HE’S A BABY!!!!!

Episode 8

LAPIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

OMG IS THIS A NEW PLANET???? PRETTY

gAPS ITS THE OTHER LAPIS

“They’re not nice like me” “ummmmmmmmmmm”

LAPIS PLEASE

“He is half-diamond. Maybe we should half-listen?” “I’ll take that as a yes!” I love them

LAPIS IS SINGING!!!!!!!!!!!!

The colors in this shot are *kisses fingers*

THATS SO MEAN

MEAN GIRLS LAPIS

kick their butts lapis

Uh Oh bad memories for Lapis

TITAN LAPIS HELL YEAH

“Restraint takes strength! Patience takes strength!” it sure does Lapis

PONYTAIL LAPIS!!!!!

Jeez this show brings back memories but it also makes me realize How Frickin Bad my mental health has tanked. That’s kind of a bummer

[a-dd-i-c-t-ed]

let go

hey again it’s me. i am addicted to xmen at the moment so i wrote somethin with Warren. probably a lot of grammar mistake (not my first language and almost 2am here in the morning) and just a trash but i’m just learning doin for myself im sorry. warnings: agnst, death, violance so here it is.

It was cold. I didn’t feel anything. I blinked weakly and thought about what actually happened.

~

I was sitting on Professor Xavier class taking notes about what he was talk about and thinking. I missed him. I missed him bad to be honest. When we were children we lived in the forest alone. We were only together kinda connected. Always felt what happened when we were apart.

But they took him away. 2 years ago happened. We slept together when they came. Took him and never heard from him since that time.

Charles Xavier school was good. They were kind and I met with a lot of person like me. I had everything but him. That was my problem.

It was an easy day like usually. Classes and after I went to garden. I never really found any friend here. They tried but I just couldn’t let anyone in.

I had my powers to lock out Charles and Jean from my head. They couldn’t see my thoughts. I had my power to fly and lasers in my hands.

I was with Jean and Scott most of the time. They talked all the time lookin at me like a friend even if I was introvelt to talk too much. 

~

My mind took small movies about us.

“Warren please stop” laughed loudly. He just didn’t stop tickiling me. “I’m about to use my powers on you”

“Oh darling are you threating me right now?” He give me small kisses on my neck made me moans quietly. “ I should punish you more then I guess...” whisperd to my ears. I got goosebumps my heart beats faster. Looked right into his eyes.

“Maybe I want you to punish me more” bite my lips playfully.

“I will darling I will” Warren kissed me passionately his wings went wide open fly up with me. My legs went around his hips kissed him like all the time. Like never before. Always.

Smiled a bit. Changed a lot after that. I didn’t really talk anyone. Maybe because I felt save with him and give me more powers to not scared from ‘normal’ people. He was always strong. When his father took him out when someone tried to kill him he never got scared. He stand up and fight until his last breath or knock them out.

But on that night he was scared.

“Yn wake up!” My eyes went wide open I had heavy breath

“What happend?!”

“They find us” I heard someone kick the door open and shouting. My body shaked and I didn’t know what to do. I freezed.

“Come on Yn we need to escape!”  He grabbed my hand and tried to fly away but then someone shot.

“You can’t escape you freaks!” It was a man who spoke Warren was bleeding.

“No you can’t hurt him!” Lasers through my hands went wild I screamed and attacted them then take Warren outside.

“Is it hurt? It is that bad? Are you okay? Please say something!” My voice was shaking tears falled down on my face.

“I’m okay Darling” he wishperd with a small smile.

“No! Don’t lie to me! We need to get away from here please!” I cried out with my panic attack. No this is can’t happening! Then I heard other voices from everywhere.

“Come on please we need to fly! I help you!”

“You can’t take me with you..”

“SHUT THE HELL UP WARREN WE ARE GOING TO ESCAPE” shouted my angst was stringer than me.

“I hold them up and you can go Yn” he stood up “we don’t have much time Yn”

“No” shaked my head more tears came.

“It’s okay... Just remember I love you. Everything is gonna be alright.”

“No.. please.”

“I love you. I need you to be safe” he had a weak smile. “It’s okay” no it wasn’t.

“They are here!” Again them the hunters.

“Go Yn!” He didn’t give me a chance to say something he flew up in the sky “here I am bastards catch me if you can!” He shouted and went the oppositoned way then me.

The guns shooting was loud I flew up after him.

“Yn go away!” He looked back deep in his eyes I could see that fear. Even he didn’t showed me.

“But Warren..”

“Go! Now!” Bite my bittom lips to not cry to loud and flew all my powers needed to be fast.

Then I heard they shoot him down.

“Go Yn it’s okay!” Heard him. Last time.

I was flying for hours. Cried with closed eyes.

I was so tired. I felt pain all over my body. The windo cut me I was bleeding. My eyes opened but I couldn’t see.

Then everything was black.

~~~

I felt my body shaking in fearness and sweatness. I was awake but I couldn’t open my eyes.

“Yn I’m here! Let me in whats happening?” Charles voice was like a miles away from me. I wanted to speak but I couldn’t. “Open you mind! I won’t hurt you I promise!” I felt my tears but I tried. I felt him in my head.

It was Warren. He was alive. He was different.

“I... need... to... save... him” whisperd haevy it was hard. I couldn’t came out of this dream.

“Yn I need you to wake up first.”

“Trying..”

“Breath...” I did. “Breath slowly do it for him.”

“I can’t” i felt weak and cried. I could speak but I couldn’t open my eyes. I just saw him and he was different like he didn’t even remember me.

“I need you to focus on yourself first! We will go there! He will remember you! Just need you to open your eyes Yn!” Charles voice closer then before. I felt my hands went out of my control lasers came out. “YN OPEN YOU EYES YOU ARE GOING TO KILL SOMEONE!”

“GET OUT OF MY HEAD!” I screamed sitting up with opened eyes jump out of the bad. “ I need to save him!” Grabbing my clothes madly.

“We will just calm down please!” Everyone was awake watching me at the door but I didn’t care.

“I NEED TO SAVE HIM CHARLES I CAN’T JUST CALM DOWN” shouted in agressive mood.

“Everyone get out of my room!” Looked the others they ran away without a word.

“I go with you.” Jean stayed.

“Me too.” Scott too.

“Okay Hank and me as well.” Charles looked at me.

It was a horrible place. Bed people shouted taked many for the winner.

They had guns.

With Jeans power they couldn’t see us. We stand in front of the cage.

One man was on the floor in blood I couldn’t see who did this to him.

But then I saw the wings.

“Warren..” whisperd in shock. “I need to get in” they tried to stop me but couldn’t someone already grabbed my hand but I attacked him with my power.

“It’s a freaks! That little kid drop her to the cage!” There was too many person to fight they hit me in the face and dropped in.

“Warren..” I stood up looked up at him cleaned my face from blood.

“Who the fuck is Warren!?” He was agressive. He had a lot of gash from fights.

But didn’t let me finish he attacked me. I flew up to block it. He tried but I didn’t fight back.

“Fight or they kill us!” Shouted at me but I couldn’t.

“They won’t hurt anyone I’m here.” Heard Charles voice in my head.

“Warren please! It’s me Yn” tried again. The people around us went outside without a word. He didn’t understand.

“Angel darling. Don’t make me angrier!” He flew and grabbed my arms stronger. He’s green eyes had no emotions.

“Warren remember the treehouse! Us! Your dad and everyone!” Whisperd silently.

“I don’t know what you think I am but I’m just going to kill you” shouted. Scott tried to open the cage in this time but he couldn’t even Jean. Charles was taking care the other people and Hank was looking after Charles if anything would happened there.

I was alone with him.

“Warren Worthington. Your father kicked you out when he found about wings. We meet in the woods first”

“Shut up!” He was grabbing my neck strong I couldn’t breath but I didn’t mind.

“We made out house there. Away from everyone.”

“You lying!” He punch me in the stomach with all his power. I fell down on the floor. Then hit me on the face. Everywhere he could. “ Stop speaking you piece of shit!” I wasn’t able to use any of my power. It hurt. He hitted my chest I felt my bones broke but nothing came out of me just blood.

“I CAN’T OPEN THE CAGE HE’S GOING TO KILL YN!” I heard Scott and Jean but I was see is him.

I put my arm on his face. He breaked it i screamed in pain.

“It hurt Warren please stop” cried out again. I felt like a baby who couldn’t do anything but crying.

“Still Angel.” He didn’t show any emotions.

“It’s okay. Just remember I love you. Everything is gonna be alright.” Sighed weakly wishper but I felt something sharp in my body.

“YN NO” I heard voices all around me but I didn’t feel any pain anymore.

“YN..” winked at Warren.

“Warren hey..” whisperd.

“Oh no.. what did I do?!” Winked more it was hard I felt sleepy.

“It doesn’t hurt. It’s okay. You are here. Agan. With me.” I smiled lazy. He put me on his lap.

“No.. help! PLEASE” he shouted but they couldn’t help. My bleed was all over me Jean cried Scott tried his best to not cried.

“It’s okay Warren. I’m going to be fine. I need to rest and sleep.” Whisperd eith closed eyes.

“No YN how could i dod this to you?! No please...”

“At least do you remember now?”

“Everything. Some mutant used his power to my memorie to not fight back. I just can’t.. I can’t lose you again YN.. I’m so sorry I didn’t know what I am doing please forgive me”

“It’s okay.” I put my hands on his face. Coughed blood but still didn’t feel anything. “I got you back in the end. Thats what matter.

“Hang on YN we got you!” Heard Charles nervous voice.

“It’s okay Professor Xavier. I am fine.” Murmured silently.

“YN no. I love you.. I need you.. I want to live rest of my life with you with kids and everything you can’t sleep!”

“Warren Worthington promise me one god damn thing. You never give up. No matter what no matter how hard just don’t. You are the love of my life” I felt pain suddenly tears fall down on my cheeks I was scared so scared. But once in my life I didn’t show anything of it. “You always will be the one but not in this life.” As I saw some light I was smiling. Around he’s face I saw my family waving to me. “I’m going to my family. They are waiting. I can see mommy and daddy.

“YN.. don’t leave I need you.”

“Just promise me you don’t let then control you. Don’t let the sadness in. Remember where we were before they came. We were happy. All thise beatiful memories like when we talking watching the stars and sleep and fly. Laughing on everything. Remember that not this moment. You didn’t hurt me at all in the end. You save me. And I am going to be thankful for this and all. Charles won’t hurt you. No one will.” Smiled. He cried kissed my forehead hugged me more closer to himself.

Then I saw just light. I was able to stand up and walk in it without looking back. I missed my family. Everyone.

But one look went back to him before it was all black.

[lil-feenz]

This Christmas (MyDay Secret Santa gift)

a/n: wow, okay first off i haven’t written a fic in years so this was a #struggle so props to all of you writers out there doin ur thing! ur amazing and you are appreciated!

i wrote this for my secret santa gift for one of the world’s nicest mydays aka @parkjaeins ! it’s been so fun messaging you, and i’m really glad i got to know you a little bit! i hope you have an amazing christmas, and i hope this is slightly enjoyable! (im sorry i still don’t quite like the beginning and end so forgive me!!)

genre: holiday fluff, angst if you squint and do a headstand

word count: 2.8k-ish oof

summary: Distance makes the heart grow fonder, they say. However, being apart for their first Christmas left Janelle particularly reminiscent. (a.k.a. holiday facetiming with Jae)

characters: Jae x OC, 3rd person (I did write this specifically for my secret santa!)

Brrrrrrng.

“Huh.”

The ringing sound slowly seeped its way into Janelle’s consciousness, insisting its way through her concentration as her brain reached for a response. What was that noise again?

Brrrrrrrng.

“Oh.”

Janelle haphazardly leaned over the bowls and ingredients crowding the counter in an effort to reach her laptop. Smudging some residual flour on the mouse pad of her laptop, she ran her fingers over the device and pressed down to hear that satisfying little click, accepting the video call request.

“Hi, babe!” she called out hurriedly, dancing around her own feet to maneuver in front of her laptop. Catching herself in and out of balance, her body finally slumped onto the countertop, a lopsided smile decorating her face.

A scratching sound echoed in the kitchen as Jae shuffled around on the other end of the call. Janelle caught the sight of the dormitory in the moving scene displayed in front of her. “He must’ve just finished at the Christmas Eve concert the boys were having,” she thought.

“Hey, baby,” Jae drawled with a tired smile on his face, raising his phone to eye level now. “How’s it going?” A soft thump pushed its way through her laptop speakers as Jae unceremoniously flopped onto his bed, followed by the murmur of ”Merry Christmas Eve.”

“Pffft,” Janelle laughed airily at his antics. “I’m doing fine, just trying to finish up some things for our Christmas get-together.” Glancing down at her hands, she noted the dusting of dry ingredients surrounding her laptop and absentmindedly brushed it away with her fingers. “How was the show tonight?”

Jae quietly beamed, his face turning up towards the ceiling. “Man, the fans’ energy was great. I think it was a nice way to finish 2018 as a group and fans, we had a pretty good year together, y’know?” He reached back, ruffling his fluffy crop of hair. “I just wish you could’ve been there.”

A small sadness panged through Janelle’s chest. “I know, I do, too…” She exhaled softly. With Jae’s world tour, music show performances, and awards shows on top of Janelle’s studies and exams that all seemed to come nonstop the past two months, the pair only had digital representations of each other to find comfort in.

A thought dwelled in the back of Janelle’s mind: she knew long distance spells like this would be a reality when she chose to let Jae into her life, but she didn’t expect that the deep craving to be there with him would ache so thoroughly. Walking into a coffee shop reminded her of their first few meetings with him. Seeing dogs on the street reminded her of the time they puppy-sat for Dowoon when Janelle concluded that Jae was absolutely a Yorkie.

-

“A Yorkie?!” Jae choked while Janelle cackled. “How on earth am I a Yorkie?”

“C’mon, don’t tell me you don’t see it. Big personality, easily susceptible to getting clowned, sassy, territorial, suspicious of every noise, they’re, like, 18 cm tall, you’re 180 cm,” she listed off, checking off each thing with her fingers. “Yorkies absolutely fit the bill.”

“Okay, okay okay,” Jae hurriedly interjected, “but I protest. I’m more like a Great Dane, or something.” He was incredulous, and she could tell. This would be fun, and she knew it. “I am friendly, I am loving, I am large and in charg-” Unfortunately, he did not get to finish before Janelle’s laughter burst through the conversation.

“Please do not finish that phrase, oh my gosh,” she managed through her giggles, sitting up. She patted his knee gingerly. “The only thing you can claim from a Great Dane is you don’t realize how big you are.”

“I am offended,” Jae gasped, eyes wide and a hand mockingly hovering over his chest, “are you calling me fat?”

Suddenly, Janelle’s humorous expression dropped. She knew what was coming. “Jaehyung Park, don’t you dare,” she tried to warn, but Jae wasn’t one to back down from a joke.

“I am honestly HURT that you would call your warm and caring boyfriend fat,” he went on, progressively leaning further into her space on the couch, “I truly thought you appreciated my physique, you’ve never once complained about my cuddles, but I guess your true feelings are showing.” He continued blabbering dramatically as he used every bit of height he had over her to lay uncomfortably on top of her protesting figure. He turned onto his back as he tried to push her into the couch as she alternated between laughs and groans of discomfort.

“Jae, you’re really bony, you know that?”

“Yep.”

“So you know I’m very uncomfortable right now.”

“Yep.”

“So then what will it take to get you off of me, if you don’t mind?”

“Admit I’m a Great Dane.”

“But you know, you’re really acting like a stubborn Yorkie right now,” she commented, wiggling underneath him to free her shoulder of his spine pressing into her. He only pushed further. “Ow!”

“Or am I just an affectionate Great Dane trying to get some reciprocated affection?” he rebutted, turning his head to catch a glimpse of her struggling underneath the dead weight of his body.

-

“Hey, is something on your mind?”

Janelle snapped back to attention, staring at the image of Jae on her laptop. He was sitting up, looking at her curiously with a bit of worry coloring his gaze.

“Sorry, I just zoned out a bit,” she smiled meekly, widening the placement of her elbows, allowing her to fiddle with her fingers.

Jae gave her a knowing smile. He could read her like a book, no, like a score, watching all the thoughts swirling intertwining within her, conveying her thoughts and emotions in a symphony of signs: the light behind her eyes, the furrow and lift of her brows, the pull of her lips, the curve of her posture. “Damn,” he thought, “I’ve got it bad.”

“It’s okay,” he assured warmly, trying to lift the mood. He knew it was hard being apart for their first Christmas as a couple, but it was Christmas, for goodness sakes, and he wasn’t about to let Janelle be sad if he could help it. “So what are you doing for the fam?” he asked, hoping to bring about a lighter topic.

Janelle looked at the bowls, sugar, baking powder, and other items scattered about next to her. “Well, I’ve been trying to finish baking as much as I can for tomorrow’s dinner so tomorrow is as stress-free as possible,” she sighed, the hours of baking she’d done the past week catching up to her. “I realized a few days ago that I’d been so busy baking for everyone else that I forgot to plan what I’d bring to Christmas dinner, so I’m just making a batch of brownies.” Her eyes flitted over the half-done batch of batter she had been making when Jae called. The oven light let out a soft click to signal it was done preheating, briefly drawing her attention to the appliance. “I figured it’s a crowd-pleaser, so I couldn’t really go wrong.”

Jae threw back his head with a groan and a smile. “You’re making brownies? Without me to taste test? I’m jealous.” There was no doubt Janelle’s baking was popular amongst her family and friends, and Jae was undoubtedly a contender for her number one fan.

Jae watched Janelle turn back towards the camera and arch an eyebrow playfully. “You better watch that sweet tooth of yours, I wouldn’t want you going out to find a substitute sweet and finding a better baker than me,” she joked. “I can’t lose my number one customer.”

A fondness curled up inside Jae’s chest. He lolled his head to the side, squinting and shaking his head. “Never, babe.” A brief but familiar silence lapsed between the two as they alternated looking at each other and at their hands. Jae quickly cut in, “But for real, you’re going to save me some, right? I put it on my Christmas list, and I’ll be very sad if I miss out on that brownie goodness.”

Janelle chuckled. “Well, if I can figure out the rules for sending food at the post, then I might just make you a batch.” Collecting her measuring spoons and snatching the tub of cocoa powder, she scooped up the soft, brown powder and tapped it into her mixing bowl. She glanced at him through the camera mischievously, attempting an air on nonchalance. “But you might check under your bed in the meantime, Santa may have left something to make it up to you.”

Squinting suspiciously to hide his excitement, he lowered his arm and scooted off the bed.  Sliding himself to the floor, he rested on his knees and elbows, still clutching onto the device that held Janelle, nervously awaiting his reaction. Sure enough, a small box sat proudly amongst the clutter underneath his bed. “Wow, a bow and everything!” he tucked his chin in in a big, goofy grin. Janelle’s view of Jae was obstructed as he ducked to grab the gift.

“Nice ceiling, are those new lights?” she quipped, heart picking up a little as she waited for him to see the gift. Jae just snorted in response. She was actually quite nervous: had the gift made it in one piece? Was it the right one? She hadn’t laid eyes on it herself, rather, she had it shipped straight to South Korea, entrusting Younghyun to receive and hide the box in Jae’s room. Abandoning the mix once more, she looked on as the camera moved around dizzyingly until Jae righted himself into view.

“Aw, thank you, babe,” Jae cooed, examining the box in his free hand.

Janelle smiled, trying to egg him on. “You can thank me after you open it! Go ahead!”

He obliged, commentating with his stream of consciousness while setting down his phone to pry open the box. “Alright, alright, I’m going. I can’t believe this, who did you have to bribe to bust into my room?” he paused and shoved his head directly in front of his phone. “Was it Brian?”

“Jae, for the love of all that is good and sacred, if you don’t open that gift, I’m going to send all of your brownies to Wonpil and make you suffer, please open it!” Janelle threatened quickly, eyebrows shooting up to try and show some authority.

“You’re not intimidating, babe.”

“...shut up and open the stinking box.”

Jae continued on, ripping open the tape keeping the box sealed. Janelle shifted on her feet, waiting for any sort of reaction.

“Well?” she asked, only catching the tip of his head from the angle of the camera.

“Well, you need to tell Brian that he’s a crappy gift wrapper. He only put a bow on it,” Jae panned, holding the red decoration over the camera for Janelle to see. Janelle heard the final rip as the last bit of tape gave up its hold on the box. Shuffling. She gazed intensely at the shot of Jae’s forehead, the nerves in her stomach tingling. She studied the way his eyebrows pushed up, creating fine wrinkles in his forehead.

Jae was silent. Janelle hopes it’s the good kind of silent. Chewing on the inside of her lip, she cautiously asked, “Do you like it?”

The view on her laptop shifted again as Jae picked up his phone. She couldn’t read the look on his face, but she didn’t push any further. Jae sat against the side of his bed, organizing his thoughts, his jaw slack and his eyes clear. “Janelle, this is…” he left his sentence unfinished, opting to shake his head and look directly into the camera. “Thank you for this,” he swiveled around, snatching his pillow off the bed to use as a stand for his phone. He carefully set down the device and leaned it against the pillow until his cross-legged figure was in full view. Next to him lay the now empty brown box, and in his lap sat a brown leather bound book. He turned his attention to it, opening the cover gently, eyes roaming the title page that read “Memories” in black script. In it were pictures the pair had taken while they had visited each other, Janelle when she went to Korea in the summer and Jae when he pit-stopped for a day after the concert stop in Jakarta. Some were selfies, showing silly faces and surprise kisses, some were sneakily taken shots of Jae sleeping on the couch or low-angle shots under his chin. He slowly flicked through the pages, seeing pictures of the coffee shop where they first met in Korea, selfies of Janelle pouting with a small plushie Jae had given her before she left to start uni.

Janelle watched on, her chin resting on the heel of her palm, her weight balancing on one foot as she crossed her ankles, resting her toes on the cool floor of her kitchen. She felt a soft bliss as Jae scanned the photo book she had made for him, a compilation of their times together so they could reminisce. She knew how sentimental Jae was inside, and she knew how hard being constantly busy was, and if he missed her the way she missed him, the distance couldn’t have been easy on him.

“I just figured it’d be nice to start keeping something to help us along when we’re apart,” Janelle divulged, eyeing the screen before letting her eyes fall to the countertop.

“There’s blank ones,” Jae remarked, looking at his screen once more. His voice was soft, devoid of the usual playfulness typical of his tone.

Janelle bit her lip, an excited smile forming on her face. “Yeah, I left those for our future memories.”

Jae rocked backwards, hands holding his ankles, hitting the side of his bed in the process. He looked down at the book again, a smile brimming on his own face. “I love it, babe. This was very thoughtful, I really like it.” Making eye contact with her through the screen, he tried to convey as meaningful a look as possible. “Come, here,” he suddenly said, holding his arms out towards the phone, wrapping it and the pillow in an awkward hug.

Janelle laughed on the other end of the line. “Well, that didn’t last long, did it?”

“Come on, don’t leave me hanging, or else this’ll get really awkward.”

“It already is awkward, Jae.”

“It’s what I do best.”

Releasing a sigh ahead of a warm smile, Janelle obliged, wrapping her laptop a hugging gesture. “You’re crazy.”

“Right back at ya,” Jae drew away, smoothly dropping a wink. Janelle gagged in response.

“What about me? Any hints for my gift?” Janelle redirected, hoping to escape more electronics-as-middleman skinship.

Looking out at his room, Jae exhaled shortly. “I checked the postage tracking, but I think it got held up in customs,” he explained, “I knew I should’ve sent it earlier.”

“Don’t worry about it!” Janelle hastily deflected the negativity pulling down on her boyfriend’s shoulders. “Anything is fine, I’m just lucky to have you,” she pressed her lips together to try and dispel any regret he may have been having.

“Janelle,” Jae began, “I think we all know that I’m the lucky one in this combo. Like, the fact that I even managed to meet you is a miracle in itself, so please, will you let me keep the title of ever-grateful boyfriend here?”

A roll of the eyes. A sarcastic smirk.

“Well, I guess, but where does that leave me, huh?”

“You win title of the most tolerant girlfriend to the most ridiculous man on earth,” he quipped.

Another eye roll. “Well, you’ve got that right,” she muttered jokingly.

“I’ll let that slide since it’s Christmas.” Jae got up from the floor, clutching the book as he waddled over to his desk.

“You love me,” Janelle swayed her shoulders to the side, leaning her head down until they met before she started to pick back up on her baking.

“You know it.”

Time slipped by as they continued to chatter about plans before ringing in the New Year. Janelle joked about kissing a random person at midnight on New Years Eve: sulking, Jae left the phone on his desk as he paced around his room. “That’s mean,” he pouted. Both of them knew that neither would ever do such a thing, and both trusted each other to not betray that.

After catching up with each other, Jae was fighting back the onslaught of sleep and Janelle was waiting for her brownies to finish baking. It was quite late, but neither party seemed to want to end the call. Eventually, Janelle’s conscience nagged her into encouraging Jae to go to bed.

“You need the rest, you shouldn’t sleep Christmas away,” she reasoned, swinging her legs from her perch on the countertop.

Jae whined, but relented. “Yes, ma’am,” he grumbled sarcastically. “Talk to you later?”

“Yeah, talk to you later. Good night, Jae.” That little pang in her chest returned, wishing earnestly that she could be there with him.

“G’night, babe,” Jae grinned, crinkling his eyes and waving before her smiling face disappeared and a dark screen took her place.

Heaving a sigh, Jae propelled himself up from his bed, going to the bathroom to wash up before packing his toiletries.

Her Christmas gift was on his way.

a/n: WOW congrats if you made it through!! hope you enjoyed it, have a merry christmas!