#im 80% complete with this project

[purplepixel]

When your animatic starts to become more like animation

Little sneak peak action shot I did today from a project I've been working on. Out of context moment from Spider's Web With Strings Attached by @psychologicalwarclaire

[ectonurites]

also i know i just posted tht newer photo but i found a 2015 'initial test of my Robin Steph' photo from when i was first building it and MAN. the side by side is funny

[skitskatdacat63]

Girl who starts a drawing project at 12:30 am on a school night

[lighthouseas]

actually sobbing like

[mybreadsmybutters]

i do the 10 rule where i will do 10 units of the thing. if thats a project, ill work on it for 10 minutes. if its the dishes, ill wash 10 of them. after the 10 is done i reassess and if it still feels sickeningly impossible to continue i stop and do something else. this way at least SOMETHING gets done and it generally alleviates some to all of the mental stress which causes the paralysis in the first place.

Is there a way to fix the paralysis loop of wanting to do something but my brain deciding that it has to feel right and ending up doing nothing all day or should I abuse substances

[mun-urufu]

silly note list because I need to fix things

no rules spamming is allowed :3 (I really wanna get these things done but need someone from the outside to nudge me, the note count is high because some things need to be later or further apart)

5 notes and I’ll drink water rn

10 notes and I’ll brush my teeth today

20 notes and I’ll have a proper full breakfast tommorow and for a week afterwards

30 notes and I’ll try to convince my parents to buy me the electronics needed to finish my tv head

40 notes and I’ll post a picture of the tv head

50 notes and I’ll post a picture of me in the tv head and a kimono I made once it’s finished

60 notes and I’ll put my laptop into a repair shop to fix it bluescreening every 10 minutes when I’m working on something more requiring on its RAM

70 notes and I’ll actually draft a project for a silly metroidvania I started working on

turned into a rouge like but who cares

80 notes and I’ll post dev logs of said silly metroidvania

90 notes I’ll get my shot together and start a twitch channel

changed into a YouTube channel

100 notes ill try and draft up a stream plan once I know all my school and extra curricular stuff

125 notes and I’ll stream my development process

150 notes and I’ll do some more extra streams and prepare an introductory video

streams not gonna happen for now but videos are being made

175 notes and I’ll start a YouTube channel where I’ll reuse some of the VODs I’ll eventually get and make some actual videos

200 notes and ill talk to my therapist about thinking I have adhd (I barely avoided failing last year)

250 notes and I’ll try to go to sleep early for a week straight

300 notes and I’ll try to fix my sleep schedule before school starts

400 notes and I’ll organize my room before school starts

500 notes and I’ll release a demo of said metroidvania

600 notes and I’ll release it on Itch.io

1000 notes and I’ll try to come out to my parents as trans (again)

didn’t go well at all

1200 notes I’ll try to make some money with my skills

1500 I’ll make a 2d game adding only y’all’s ideas

I might add some more later goals later (some of the numbers are prone to adjustment but I’ll try to avoid that, and do it only for the yet to be completed ones)

tags under the cut to get this started

@hadoom @uwathebestgirl @im-a-sentient-magic-carpet @thecrazyalchemist

I’m making a mistake with this one

@tanihanya

[yourcutelittlegayfriend]

LEMME TELL YOU SOMETHING! LEMME TELL YOU SOMETHING!!

*grabs your shirt and pulls you close*

DC/Batfamily x Witwicky! Reader x Transformers (Completely Platonic only)

where reader gets sent to Gotham when they're still a baby for their safety as a last resort (which is fckn crazy like cuz pick which one is worse Joker or Megatron) by their Witwicky relatives because of Optimus orders so they can distract the decepticons first and find them again when it's safe (Sam may or may not exist in this au).

First origin After that Reader grew up in an orphanage but became a prodigy because of their high IQ and fascinating inventions due to inheriting their -unknowingly- great great grandfather Archibald Amundsen Witwicky's intelligence (idk im just winging this) then becoming the youngest engineer/mechanic in the gotham (world idk) that caught the attention of Batman when they accidentally hacked the batcomputer something they kind of jokingly bet to their professor so they don't have to do their thesis but was peer pressured in the end.

Batcomputer : *Starts glitching*

Batfam: *slightly tensed but wants to figure out who's the insane dummy that tries to hack THE Batcomputer*

Screen:

Reader: Heeeeeyyyyy it's meeeeee a hard working college student that needs proof that I actually hacked your computer, so Imma just take a lil pic and we'll just go back to our regular programming okie? Okay! *takes a selfie with the whole ass batfamily in their screen*

Reader: Thanks Batman! keep up the good work now to destroy evidence of the crime scene (still on the screen) *Shuts their laptop and proceeds to throw it out the window after*

*Gets adopted by Bruce Wayne anyway because a 13 year old kid in college needs money -preferably in cash- support and a Billionaire with the history of adopting wacky kids wants them for funsies*

Reader : *sits in the batcave with the hacking video on repeat in the batcomputer, surrounded and outnumbered by the batfam* Fuuuucccckkkk

Or 2nd you were sent instead by Edmund Burton, Alfred was the best option to protect and take care of the last descendant of Merlin and youngest member of the Order of Witwiccans, you grew up under Bruce Wayne but used the last name Pennyworth as a disguise to hide your true lineage, you still end up becoming a prodigy and the sort of mechanic of the family (you literally 80-90% engineered and build the Batmobile and most of Batman's gadgets) you didn't end up becoming a vigilante/hero because you stive to be the normal one or The civilian member in the family, You're either a nephew/niece to Bruce or the living in Cousin to the kids, you bet your ass you're either partner in crimes with Tim/Barbara or you kept -humbly- beating their asses over being the smart ass in the family.

Tim: *Best at hacking, Tech and gadgetry, the more smart robin and on the line to become the Wayne inc CEO* I'm not bragging or anything.

(All robins are smart he's just abit on top)

Reader: *looks at their name in all of the blueprints of gadgets, weapons, suits, transportations, the batcomputer, the batmobile, the watchtower, the JL headquarters security/bldg and the upgraded batcave system* That's great Timmy! you really are the smartest! *side eye the stacked up and approved projects for Gotham Structural proposals as well as the contract papers for the new in line brand of Tech you're making and quickly hiding the shiny nameplate 'CEO of the most famous electronics brand' with your name engraved on it*

It can also be x Neglected Reader as well where any of the 2 is your origin but you barely get noticed by your family other than your inventions and because you really don't like being into the family business due to not having the physical advantage of literally punching someone in the face without breaking your hands first.

so you just exist and try to finish college and live away to find your other family/ Find Edmund or just travel the world.

Origins aside

The reason why you are so important is the location of the all spark that was supposed to be imprinted to Archie's glasses was transferred to his brain instead become wired inside and somehow passed down to you that's why Optimus needed you safe until they can send the Decepticons away and find you.

I can imagine it going down like this

The world was under a new threat either by Megatron, the decepticons, Unicorn or even The Quintessons no one yet knows other than J'onn J'onzz /Martian Manhunter and Hal or the whole Green Lantern Corps who were close or worked with the Autobots before were alerted by them to ask for help.

Optimus and the rest of the growing Autobots that were left in the planet as well as Edmund met up with the Justice League to have a discussion about the new threat and was surprised that they only need someone instead.

Batman: Why do you specifically need this someone?

Edmund: I have sent orders to the Witwicky family to send their child here in your city for their safety due to the facts they have the location of the all spark also being the last and youngest member of the Order of Witwiccans.

Zatanna: Wait The Witwiccans? the one Merlin founded?

Edmund: Precisely my dear but should also add that they are the last living descendant of Merlin

Constantine who drops his lit cigarette: Fuckin hell and here I thought that man died a virgin HA!

Superman: And what is the all spark?

Optimus Prime: The All spark is a very powerful and ancient artifact from our old planet Cybertron, it has been documented by our people that it has the essence of our creator Primus himself.

Justice League looks more concerned:

Batman: And what danger does it bring to earth?

Optimus and the rest file them in about the years of war between the Autobots and decepticons, the destruction of Cybertron, they're arrival to Earth and explaining why the All Spark must never land in the hands of someone like Megatron or anything one with evil intentions.

Superman: Then as a fellow Alien that has took refuge and promise to protect Earth, We will help you but you must promise not to endanger the life of this Witwicky kid.

Batman: Now the only problem we need to solve is their whereabouts.

Edmund: Oh don't bother with that I had Hot Rod and Bumblebee fetch them earlier this morning.

Cue in a racing expensive red Lamborghini and yellow Chevrolet Camaro before transforming in the air and lands with You in Bumblebee's hand.

Reader: Hi! I don't know what's happening I didn't do it if you think I'm the suspect, I won't tell you anything till I get my lawyer.

The rest are in shock to see tiny you while Edmund greets you and distracts you from the rest.

The batfam and the rest of the league looks at Batman for an explanation

The younger heroes and sidekicks are amaze when they got a proper introduction from who you are.

Not Neglected Reader part:

Batfam are more proud about you but a bit worried because of the large problem you now have to carry on your shoulders but is happy you got tons of literal giant robot aliens to protect you along with the other heroes.

Neglected Reader part:

Batfam are shock to know the real you and what amazing things you've been hiding from your family, not only are you this legendary person that can locate and has the power to use a life giving artifact you've also been hiding your true self from them as they watch you interact with the Autobots and how you become comfortable and be expressive to them, you might be small and just a kid to their eyes but to the Autobots it's like you're their world.

----

THAT'S ALL I GOT FOLKS!

Tell me if ya like it I might make this after I finish or laid down NMC! this doesn't have to be Yandere btw

[amore-ciao]

i dont believe the whole "mike never could contact will because the phone line was always busy"

DONT SHOOT

BECAUSE

in el's letter to mike in episode one, she said that joyce had RECENTLY gotten the telemarketer job

when they had already been living in california for over a year

so lets say "recently" is in reference to two months maybe.

wheres the other ten months mike ???

and its not like the letter took long to send, in case thats the argument. letters took up to around week in the 80s (correct me if im wrong)

and its certainly not a old letter because el also wrote about her very recent completion of her project, that failed the same day that mike read the letter

edit: yall its 185 days (6 months) mb 😔 point still stands ish

[bluerasbunny]

chat would you still read video killed the radio star (DCA radio host AU) if i rewrote it without the x reader?

explanation on the current state of VKTRS and why i'm considering this change below! dont vote bunny choice pleas that's just so i can see the poll results

so! chapter 3 has taken a ridiculously long time, and i'm going to be completely honest;

it's because i am not enjoying writing an x reader. i don't like writing from a you/yours perspective, i don't enjoy writing a faceless character and that's impacting my drafting for the story, because i'm just... not enjoying it!! i'm not a selfshipper (aromantic with a complete disinterest in romance) and im not a fan of reading x readers, which is making it even harder for me, because i am producing something i myself wouldn't read

and in a sense that's my own fault, because i thought i had to do an x reader to succeed. but i don't want to produce a poorly done end product that i'm not satisfied with in the name of attention and success. i want to create something that has passion in the heart of it and something that i'm proud of!!

i don't want my fic to be a chore. i want it to be a passion project that you can tell i'm excited for. i don't have my heart in the first two chapters of vktrs and i think you can tell, and i don't want that! i don't want that to be all you see of my writing! moral of the story is; new creators for the DCA fandom, please don't think you have to do an x reader to succeed. create the fiction you want to see, not what you think other people want to see. do not pull a bunny!

so, with that said, what's my plan?

i'm gonna be honest! i don't know, at least not yet! maybe i'll remove the x reader and have it be sun x moon! maybe i'll replace the x reader with an OC, though you can certainly still put yourself in their position! the story remains reasonably the same; a 30 chapter horror/mystery/romance fic about 80s robot radio hosts! perhaps with more of a horror flare, perhaps with more dysfunctional toxic yaoi (because it's a bunny fic those are my two skills), but it will follow a very similar plot!! just it will not be an x reader and it will not be written from a you/yours perspective, because that's just not me!! that's not what i want to write or what i want to read!!

of course, this banks on the outcome of the poll!! but if it ends in a no, then at least you guys know about the current state of the radio host AU and why it's been so slow going!! apologies for the ramble, this has been on my chest for quite a long time

i just hope the end result will be something both you and i will love!! no matter what, i promised VKTRS will be finished, and i intend to live up to that no matter how long it will take. (i just need to beat my procrastination over the head with a bat to actually get things done either way...)

[simpel-is]

ranting abt moonlight again bc holy FUCK THIS FILM IS SO SMART AND SO GOOD WITH ITS COLOR

this hyperfixation will drag me into the ground and i will happily go along

spoilers for the movie (if u havent seen it go watch it mf its pride month) also discussion about religion (kind of), homophobia, black masculinity identity and culture, ect ect

no because how tarell mccraney and barry jenkins used the color blue as a symbolism in this movie is SO FUCKING GOOD i feel like in almost every scene u can see a color being used in a symbolic way

in my interpretation at least, blue here represents both vulnerability, security with one's identity but also masculinity (in the sense how blue is used in society to represent men and masculine gender roles, the expectations that come along), and which meaning of the blue is used is colored (ha get it) by the context of the scenes

at the end we reach the conclusion that masculinity and vulnerability can co-exist without contradicting each other in the final sequence of little in blue moonlight but WE WILL GET TO THAT IN A BIT

in the beginning chase sequence little is getting bullied and chased while he wears a blue backpack -> the blue here represents the vulnerability, and how it paints a target on chiron to get bullied by other kids

even in subtle details like how juan drives a blue car but doesn't wear blue on himself, how teresa wears blue through-out the movie, how there's hints of blue in juan and teresa's home (in that scene where juan has little sitting with his front to the door but back to the blue, but we the audience can see it, smth tells me its supposed to be how juan is trying to put up a front to act as a reliable older figure for little which GUH JUST SHOWS HOW MUCH HE CARES), his house's walls and mother wore blue at the beginning scenes which shows when he was younger he could feel and project vulnerability into his own home at one point

during the little section, after the chase sequence little is shown wearing a red shirt while other kids, including kevin, wear white and blue. white here is sort of used as a neutral color of uncertainty and perhaps innocence, while red is the opposite of blue; it's invulnerability, but also insecurity and femininity (which lines up with how chiron's mother wears red in the scene she yells at him), and it shows how chiron is outcasted with the kids, bc of his quiet nature

during the chiron section, the bully wears red and black, contrasting against chiron's mainly light colored outfits. i thought a long time for what the yellow could stand for, and maybe it's there to represent whenever chiron feels love towards another character (teresa, kevin, in specific scenes with his mother) or that sense of escapism (when he was running to the beach at night), his shirt for 80% of this section is a plaid shirt with yellow blue and white sort of mixed up together and a blank white shirt inside

before and during the betrayal scene, he wears a white shirt with blue lines, no yellow anymore bc it felt like he doesn't need to imagine kevin's love for him only exists in dreams. it's reality now, and it makes things more clear for him and his identity (THEIR SHIRTS EVEN MATCH LIKE THEY COMPLETE EACH OTHER IM GONNA CRY.)

also it might be to distinguish when its masculinity or vulnerability but the shade of blue used during the revenge scene is a more teal blue while the moonlight blue is like a natural real blue without a tint of green (i could yap on abt how green is used but this is getting too much)

now during the black section of the film, yellow is first used to represent anxiety for chiron when he wakes up from the nightmare; that escapism and affection he felt for kevin and his mother now reminds him of what happened years ago. it still haunts him. and it also haunts kevin shown in the scene when he calls chiron to apologize (but at the center the lighting is blue. he calls in vulnerability)

as black travels back to confront his past and familiar ties, his mother now wears light blue which is contrasted against chiron's darker shade of blue shirt in the forgiveness scene (they're on different ends of the spectrum, but they're slowly healing, both on the same page of what they wanna do; heal from the past)

as the movie continues, the yellow in scenes slowly turns to represent familiarity and affection instead of anxiety, but the yellow doesn't look warm or as bright as before; there's still tension, things left unsaid. but at the centre, the focus point of these scenes, there's blue, and it isn't tinted by another color (the car drive scene, how blue light peeks in through the diner scene, when kevin changes into a blue shirt)

and the scene where black fucking says "you're the only man who's ever touched me." good fucking god.

he looks at kevin's shirt. he wants the blue. he wants to share the vulnerability with kevin.

when kevin holds chiron, the lighting is dark, and the yellow now is warmer, it represents familiarity and affection again. a lot of things are still a mystery to them, a lot still left unsaid, but everything feels familiar again in a new way, in a more intimate way.

and that fucking scene where little looks back in the blue moonlight, showing how chiron's vulnerability and masculinity don't have to contradict one another; he reaches security with his child self. he finally heals.

this movie is so, so beautiful.

[darushi-chan]

HOTD Modern AU where everyones dragons are some kind of reptile or amphibian.  Sooo, I finally gathered the courage to add my own stuff to the HOTD fandom, lol. I love reptiles, specifically Komodo dragons, I’ve made like 3 different college projects with them and it was impossible for me to not see Vhagar as one, I’ve seen other really good takes with old grandma V being a snapping turtle, an alligator and so on, and then I decided to imagine my own modern AU were all the Targaryan dragons in HOTD are some kind of reptile pet! -Because Targ shenanigans they do have a special bond with their reptile friend (Thats the only way you get a croc and a Komodo to dont eat you, lol). -The dragon keepers are a special reptile breeder company, the Targs are like one of their most important clients . -To add more lore and stuff I like the idea of them living in a made up european country called Valyria, like Genovia from the princess diaries, or at least just a modern westeros and Valyria being their something something big company where they work. -If they live in Valyria they do have the monarchy problems, but without the murder plis, Aegon ll its like fuck you all and runs away to Italy or France and starts a wine company called “The usurper” xD.  -Because I like Jacegon, Jace goes along with him so he doesn’t die from bad decisions and because I think he’ll be more reliable with the new company stuff hahahahaha, Aegon just tests the wine ok 😂?  -Lucerys its also like, the crown? No thanks, and goes to college to study literature, also in the some college as Aemond, who’s in a History major, they’re roommates 👀. -Joffrey its even less interested in the crown and decides to help his grampa Corlys with Driftmark. -I’m mexican, I dont know how Dukedoms and all that fancy european stuff works, Driftmark can be one of those or something, I’ll do some research after the reptile drawings ok xD? -That way the crown can go to little Aegon the younger without anybody dying yay. -Rhaenyra its not that ok with this, but she loves her kids, and hopes little Egg doesn’t run away too.... Im just starting with my favorite incest deranged couple, Lucemond 😚. I think its obvious this is not completed at all 😅, but I was really exited about it and wanted to talk about it after being working on it all day 😄.

More stuff about the not dragons! -They can’t live the hundreds of years of the dragons, so lets make them live as long as their owner lives, an average 80-90 years, for this HC sake hahahaha, specially because turtles, komodos and crocs are able to live long lives too! So lets make all the other special Targ reptiles/amphibians live longer too 😝. -This makes Grandma V, Vhagar ll, because Vhagar l was Visenya’s, when Laena dies in some kind of accident Aemond claims Vhagar ll so she doesn’t die, specially because she wasn’t that old then, wiki says Laena dies at 27, I havent thought that much about what happens in the Driftmart incident, but something happens 👀! -Then the Viserys l Balerion it’s Balerion ll too! Vissy T gets to keep his croc and makes him an awesome enclosure, lol. Alicent never goes there 😂, but Viserys likes to see when the servants feed him or to just chat with his friend, he has this really nice enclosure like in the zoos where you can go like underground and see them swim.

-Helaena’s kids can have little geckos or something cute like that, I need to think about it 🤔.

-Im not very sure about Caraxes being a red Tegu, they’re awesome, but I don’t know if I should make him be something else, any thoughs anyone 🤔? If you have any other ideas that are different from the ones I have so far let me know 😉!! The only ones that Im very sure about are Vhagar and Arrax, I’m really in love with the idea, and I also like them all being something different, except for Silverwing and Vermithor uwu.

[eebie]

2024 for me

- shadowed my bro over spring break and collaborated on art with him for an album that got a grammy nomination which was pretty cool

- graduated highschool like a boss

- finally met two friends who i’d known online since i was 13

- got pretty active on twitter for a while doing undertale stuff

- joined a cool UT project that im still working on

- drove 11 hours to college

- dated somebody for the first time

- spent part of my birthday sitting in a downpour waiting for a bus that never came. it was nice but i was completely soaked by the time i got home

- went stargazing in a park with my roommate and her friends at 4:00 am

- learned about ram ranch & cum trutherism

- got into photography Kinda

- played a video game on a computer for the first time in like 3 years

- made a lot of new friends

- collabed with a buddy on a video

- got a haircut & gained an interest in cool hats

- met a tumblr mutual IRL unknowingly

- made the deans list

- spent a lot of time alone & got to know myself a little better

- egg cracked(…?)

most of this year was very blurry and i’m no less neurotic than i was at the start of it but the key things that i do remember are mostly positive so i give it a solid 80

[qoldenskies]

Oooo kickback is so interesting!! Im so curious about Splinter especially :0 why was he kicked out of his family, and why did you choose to give him dercums out of everything?

dercum's disease is what my mom has,,, its incredibly rare and has NO treatment, some painkillers dont even work. it causes really sudden weight gain and excruciating chronic pain; i really think it like. unfortunately made sense for splinter's brand of issues, its something i have experience with via a family member and its a pretty good equivalent to the mutation.

and i also think it sets up the premise well, it got worse around the time when they were luckily old enough to work but he's ALREADY been saddled with chronic pain before this point + the usual depression and trauma is staying, which explains the kind of similar family dynamic to canon. realistically now in order to leave the house his best bet would be a mobility device like a wheelchair, but for one i dont think he would considered himself "disabled enough" to need it because he can still walk, which is a terrible perspective to have but they're all a little fucked up like that. the internalized ableism demon has a hold of everyone in this fuckass family

^^^ and also he does not have the money for it, and would be unable to find a proper diagnosis; from what i've seen, there is ONE specialist in the US for dercum's disease, and that would just be to get a diagnosis, there is NO TREATMENT. and said specialist lives in arizona.

as for his family, piebald's the cousin i mentioned because i wanted to include her, she's quite a bit older (probably in her late 20s now) and babysat them before splinter moved across the country, so she's surprisingly present in their lives. lmao mostly through like, facebook correspondence and shit but she'll be relevant! with the rest of 'em i think it was mostly just caused by him not getting along with his guardian kind of like in canon, it was a mix of slacking off (maybe he dropped out? itd be interesting if he projected both that pain onto leo who's following in his steps, and donnie who he can live vicariously through because he regrets not going to college, even if he doesn't want to hurt either of them) + he was queer in the 80s, which is an explanation of its own. it just makes sense to make him really engrossed in queer culture .... something about him ..... he's a little outdated though (said with love)

with a really rare disease, no family to financially depend on, one of kids dropping out of school because of untreated issues he KNEW ABOUT but couldn't do anything about, one being uninterested in college, and the other one skipping it completely to focus on really basic work just to keep them alive, its. tough. it just unfortunately makes sense that a lot of this would go on donnie's shoulders; and while splinter is trying, so so so hard, there's a small part of him that's urging him a little too hard to stay on track about the future.

I MADE THIS AU LITERALLY YESTERDAY I DONT KNOW WHAT HAPPENED EITHER

[ronanceautistic]

Honest question, do you fear that they’ll pair up nancy and steve together with the only explanation being :) standard hetero high school sweet heart :) because im terrified

Nancy doesn’t want a picket fence and gaggle of children 😭 nancy wants to expose and topple world leaders

I refuse to think about it for more than 5 seconds bc I do not trust them to make the right decision, but I think they’ve invested too much time in Jancy to throw it away in 8 episodes or less. And it helps that Natalia and Charlie are together in real life, which obviously,,, yk, actors and characters are separate entities, but as far as I recall, their chemistry & relationship pushed the writers to make Jancy canon in Season 2, so there’s at least a little influence there.

I think Jancy is cute as young loser teenagers, I don’t know how their future would go, but whatever it is, it feels better than The Other Ship.

Honestly? If it wasn’t the final season I would have faith in the writers. But there have been plenty of shows that have made very questionable final seasons with seemingly no logic behind the decisions made so who knows.

But I do think one of the benefits ST has compared to other shows where final seasons have fallen flat is that it’s very clear that the creators very much care about how the show, rather than just ratings or shock value or, uh, complete and utter creative control to one single person in a certain 80s sitcoms case.

I would not nearly like ST as much as I do if it wasn’t very clearly a small passion project that blew up way more than expected and ended up with a budget lol. Plus we’ve heard good things from the cast on the ending, which is their job of course, but it feels sincere so far.

[motorhearted]

Quick Update (02/07/25)

Hi! Long time no see. Things have been a bit hectic for me and I’ve been circulating through a lot of different creative writing projects. To be honest I’ve been having trouble sticking to one thing for more than a month or two at a time, and that’s been extremely frustrating. I really want to be able to work on Motorheart, especially this storyline, long enough to make progress… it’s not a world I plan to abandon by any means. I’ve been developing this story for years now. My interest may ebb and flow, but I still love it dearly and would like to get Brad’s story completed at some point soon.

Long story short, Motorheart is still absolutely a thing, I’ve just been preoccupied with other tasks/concepts and life is making it hard to focus. And with that being said, here’s some things I want to get done/am changing:

1. I will be removing the written preview chapters from this blog. I appreciate everyone who read them so so much. The reason they’re being archived is because I’m toying with ideas for a different format. Motorheart has had several drafts over the years and I’m still developing the latest, so even if I were to stick with full prose I feel as if I wouldn’t be comfortable presenting it in its current state.

Besides… I just don’t like my writing and I’d like to put more care into editing for future drafts. If you’re interested in being an editor (or test reader) feel free to reach out! (Unfortunately I can’t offer a lot in return other than my thanks, I do not have the money to directly hire people.)

What the new format will actually look like is very much in the air. I’m leaning towards a First Person POV (both Brad and Joan) with some illustrations and plot/thematically-relevant tidbits here and there. More than anything I want to have fun writing it. I want to get it completed in a way that’s actually manageable. So when I have a clearer idea I will update everyone.

2. Since Motorheart is moreso the world’s name now rather than the singular story it started out as, I’ve decided to give a title to Brad’s plotline: Runaway Champion. This has the potential to change in the future but I’m just happy to have something there during development.

I have also considered making more separate stories within the universe simply because it’s fun and I don’t want the two current works to be the end-all. More on that will come along eventually; as I’m writing this, I have character concepts but no plots.

3. Im going to try releasing new material only when I have a solid, updated (and edited) draft thats at least 80% done. I will still answer asks, share art, maybe share previews. I’d really like to make character profiles as well. But the actual story of Runaway Champion may not be here for a while.

I wish I could give an estimate on a release date, I really do, and it’s just not possible for me right now. I’m hoping to recenter my creative focus and get some decent work done for Motorheart this year. All in all, we’ll wait and see and I will update where I can.

Thank you for your interest in this project, it means a lot to me. And thank you for reading this post!

[hylaversicolor]

i love your ocelots im so curious could you elaborate more on ocelot getting into drugs and what you think that looks like for him over the years and how it affects his relationships 🤨 again i love your ocelots sm i giggle and clap my hands together whenever you post

yes ofc!! keep in mind this is PURE headcanon and speculation not meant to be meta or anything like that by ANY means

i think he starts doing coke and other fun stuff in the early 70s bc he's partying with eva a lot and substances are plentiful. he's right at his mid 20s debuff so it's starting to get a little harder to pull multiple all nighters in a row in order to keep up with his like 7 full time jobs, and here and there he'll use whatever is on hand to help with that. but his drugs era (if you will) i think can be divided into 3 distinct phases which are:

les enfants terribles - i think after bb leaves the patriots ocelot takes on a lot of guilt which he carries with him for the rest of his life, culminating in his actions during mgs4. if you take the conversation ocelot and zero have in portable ops as canon, ocelot was technically the one who got the leverage on zero to have bb join the patriots, which resulted in bb being cloned without his knowledge or consent. ocelot would probably feel responsible for that and vows to stay behind with the people who betrayed bb to keep an eye on zero and para-medic for bb's sake, while bb gets out of there as fast as he can. bosselot doesn't really have a breakup moment but the fallout from the LET project is probably the closest thing we have to one. and i think ocelot begins using more heavily to cope with his guilt during this period

the latter half of the 9 year gap - i think ocelot really just starts to fall apart the farther he gets from big boss (for the above reason as well; the guilt endures, bc in his mind he's seen john off to colombia and only a short time later he goes into the coma). but he's also busier than ever with the diamond dogs, being a part of the GRU, working for the CIA, etc. he's tried just about everything at least once but in particular i think he uses a lot of amphetamines just to like. get all his shit done. when ecstasy starts going around in the 80s he gets into that too. this all is tough on kaz, who like ocelot did a ton of coke in the 70s, but unlike ocelot got out of the habit. the longer it goes on the more of a strain his use puts on their work/personal relationship (however you wanna interpret ocelhira) bc kaz is constantly picking up his slack and carrying narcan everywhere and nagging him about it. but the annoying thing is that ocelot is still infuriatingly competent even in the throes of addiction. it's more of a physical addiction for him so his body still needs it even if in his mind he's like noooo it's Fine i can stop. i think he might have a couple close calls.

post mgsv - i think he finally gets properly clean during/after (unclear timeline) the events of phantom pain out of concern for his own life lol. during mgsv i think he's down to mostly weed anyway. bb is back so he has no excuse for physically and mentally destroying himself when he can still give himself to bb completely. i think he still continues to smokes weed decades later though.