#if u see something wrong with this no u dont im not fixing it
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my beautiful wife kori and her guy
#just look at their faces the rest doesnt matter#i finished this pretty fast im knockin out now#kori's hair ended up looking like half of a heart so i wanted to emulate it in the background#dick grayson#nightwing#robin#koriand'r#kory anders#starfire#teen titans#new teen titans#batman#dickkory#dc fanart#dc comics#ash's doodlings#if u see something wrong with this no u dont im not fixing it
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ah, so apparently lawson WAS williams' first choice but red bull didn't want to let him go incase they needed a midseason driver swap
#f1#do the swap rbr. atp mclaren will get constructors.#maybe even wdc if you dont fix the car#what is there to lose except some sponsorship money?#you can't just rely on 'max effect' when the competition has a rocketship and u have '96 volvo 850#idk if i rb'd something abt this earlier im literally so tired and out of touch with time#but i remember seeing a tweet about this yesterday#correct me if im wrong
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maybe this is a controversial opinion but like....some of yall are getting Way too comfortable at the idea of killing another human being just because theyre “problematic”
#like idk it just rly rubs me the wrong way#some people on here see someone with a '''bad'''' opinion or moral stance and are like#well then die :)#like....maybe chill a bit#i know ive personally said elon musk and jeff bezos could die tomorrow and id be like jesus finally#and maybe im being a hypocrite but i feel theres a difference between saying that#capitalist pigs that hold all the worlds money and dont do shit to help fix the world or whatever#and instead spend it on going to space for fun or buying a social media site only to run it to the ground#could honestly die today and id be like yeah we're better off than like#saying a celebrity should die for being problematic or something#i see it with like creators and vas and other random users too#like u guys need to stop being so comfortable being so horrible#and understand that there are so many differing opinions and morals in the world#u are not righteously good because you feel you are the ''least problematic'' because good and bad are not things that are so black and whit#also wishing death upon someone for having a kind of shitty opinion when instead you could be wishing that they eventually become educated#and change their views and morals#thats not rly up the alley of 'good guy' lol#vent tag#sorry all my thoughts are in the tags
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...
#ever sit like a corpse in your own body?#im doing a job i wasnt designed for. theres this funny thing we do in academia where we beg for money. write in consise phrasing why we#deserve funding. what it is about our project what it is about our personhood that makes us deserving. what we're doing in our present to#give back and ensure a better future. and i can pull together a description of a nervous kid who couldn't read but loved to learn anyway.#who didnt kno how to hold proper a conversation until college and so tried and got better at ppl. who wouldnt let a language problem get in#the way of information gain. who cares about making complicated info visually digestible. and that's a nice story. but it falls apart when#projected into the future. what r u doing for the future? im just trying to continue existing#dont u want to help other ppl like u? sure but i dont have anything nice to say to them. does it ever get easier? no. it probably never will#ur brain was not built for reading. sometimes things r just terrible and u have to accept that. develop a crippling mental disorder or do#something where u dont have to read. see. not helpful. bad attitude. im just too full of blood and broken glass. all my achievements r#stained red and it hurts to look at them. to get myself to function i have to squeeze so tight i can feel the strain in my head. and even#then its not enough. do u kno what its like to spend ur whole life building something only to watch it burn to ashes in front of u? just a#broken machine rotting away underground where no one will see it. but dont let things fester. speak up if somethings wrong. and say what?#lmao i wrote this last night and then today when my advisor was like: hows it going? do u feel like u have enough time to get everything#done? and i had the gall to be like *voice strained high to prevent crying* its alright i think ive got enough time. bc yea technically i#think there r enough hours in yhr day that if i really tried i could get it all done. but that doesn't count the time i spend laying with#thr absolute desolation of my mind. so no. there isnt enough time bc im not doing well. but there's nothing he can do abt it so ya kno#whats the point in talking abt it except to say ya sorry im such a wretched miserable person. i dont kno how to fix it. my enthusiasm is#hidden under layer upon layer of pain. i burnef out before even getting here and im only making it worse#but whatever ill see my therapist Tuesday#unrelated
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the most dangerous part of having a pet au that u never seriously work on except think abt it to ur writing playlist as u drive is that. you develop it. and it gets better. and then you really really want to write it. and you're in danger
#laughs in 5 ongoing fics#to be fair. i started them in 2019 and have updated them only like twice#so my readers know i am very slow#however thats why i can only talk abt this on this blog. bc if those guys find out im indulging other ideas i will get#well. nothing. nobody talks to me and only like 5 people actively keep up with me#but i will disappoint those mutuals and have to commit seppuku#anyway its precisely bc the bnha ending was so milquetoast that i have evolved this stupid fic#ah yes the story abt the children suffering due to the wrongs of the adults and trying to fix or burn the world and dying for their parents#ends with... nothing changing#and in fact. the parents get redeemed where the children must die#however. a story where that happens AGain however the main weapon of the children against the system is the reanimated no1 hero?#yeah.......#children who are hurt and angry and have the power to do something serious about it is my fav shit. sorry#and u know who has to fix it all and burn it all down properly this time? the guy with severe issues.#fellas is it gay to fall in love with your best friend and rivals reanimated corpse who came back wrong#however its still the closest you'll ever get to having him back#but you cant tell him you love him bc he;s not the same. he's not the one you've always loved#and then loving him as the monster they turned him into feels wrong but you do it anyway#he died for the system you're upholding even if its wrong. what are you supposed to do#now he is literally destroying that same system. do you choose your boss or do you choose the guy that used to know u the best in the world#i havent decided yet. i got distracted by the tragedy#anyway th story is that our protagonist ends up in possession of the reanimated hero bc of a quirk mishap kind of#and to curb his aggression to anyone that isnt the protagonist . they get him to play league of legends#bc he can vent his violent tendencies without anyone actually getting harmed. and accidentally becomes a ranked player#he doesnt eat or sleep so all he does in the handful of hours the protagonist has to crash is absolutely wreck shit online#“hey can i come over and see our friend who came back wrong?” “no the sight of a human will send him into a kill spiral.#however you can play video games with him as long as u dont mind getting killed a million times."
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a lil birdie told me you wanted some le ssera asks😈m
HEAR ME OUT. mean!dom!chae absolutely bitching you. you would come home from a night out with your friends, but chae was so pissed because kkura was flirting with you so she would just pounce on you once she shut the door! ripping off your clothes so she can get a taste of your sweet fat cunt, she has you cumming all on her tongue and then she starts rubbing her soaked cunt against yours. choking you while she grinds her cunt against yours, saying, “would kkura unnie like you like this? you whore, i bet you want her riding your pretty face or sucking on your tits while i fuck you dumb.” overstimming you until you both are cumming on eachothers cunts! she doesn’t even give you a break because she’s now riding your pretty face, purposely squeezing her thighs around your head and until she’s squirting all over your face and in your mouth :3
IN FOR IT ✦
Kim Chaewon x fem reader (plus a special guest)
warnings: mean! dom! chae, bratty! sub!reader (later), brat tamer chae, reader likes older women, degradation, mommy kink, overstimulation, marking, manhandling squirting, tribbing, oral, edging, pussy slapping, regular slapping, face sitting, ppl thirst over reader, secret relationship, they dont know how to hi communicate, a bit toxic… yeah, um idk i think rhats it?
wc: 2.2k (not proofread)
anon we could make out if you want i mean… im not against it or anything… but i had to reqrite this bullshit like three tiems im so fucking done ☹️ (a/n at the bottom as always 💪) oh and thank u @ningvory for deciding the pics for chaewonnn🫶🏼🫶🏼
“ugh- fuck! chae.. t-too tight-!”
“okay, shut the fuck up weirdo.. god making this sound so sexual..” chaewon was currently helping you lace up the back of your dress, getting ready for your first meeting with her members.
“there, oh holy shit.” finally getting the bow right, she stands back to admire her work.
“hm? whats up? do i look bad or something..” you do a spin in front of the mirror, stopping after seeing your tits. “DAMN I LOOK GOODDDDD”
“huh- yeah, yeah whatever..” chaewon pushes her hair back before covering her mouth, barely muffling a groan.
“oh? whats wrong baby… don’t you think i look pretty? or maybe.. you’re too busy staring at these..?” you grope your tits, a sultry look in your eye. her eyes never leaving the sight of your breasts nearly spilling out of the red lacy fabric, “tell me mommy, which part of me interests you the most?” you pull her closer by her tie, letting her pin you against the mirror. “fuck… your- your eyes..” shes practically whimpering at this point, cant even hold eye contact with you. the light in her eyes shift, starting to droop at your intoxicating scent “mm.. and what color are my eyes baby?” your hand brings her face closer, letting her come up with a coherent answer “red.” she says with confidence, before pulling you impossibly closer by your exposed hips and letting your lips meet. its a messy kiss, shes sucking on your bottom lip, tasting your lipgloss then going back to exploring your mouth. teeth clash as chaewons so desperate for you, all of you. she wants.. no, she needs every part of you, and she needs it now. pulling away from your plump lips, she starts leaving open mouthed kisses trailing down your jaw, remnants of lipgloss stain your skin. breaking out of the trance, you try pushing her away, “ h-hold on.. ! your m-members are waiti-“ “don care pretty girl, need you now..” you gulp as chaewon starts untying the bow she spent oh so long to perfect..
“CHAEWON ARE YOU FUCKING CRAZY?!? ugh… we’re half an hour late- huh.. slow down!”
you’re rushing to fix your makeup, and to hide the marks she recklessly left. “well maybe if you didn-“ chaewon feels something poking her neck, “dont.. dont you fucking dare finish that sentence Kim Chaewon.” she nods quickly to not anger you more. fixing your messy hair as chaewon kept honking the cars horn “fucking bitch… WE’RE ON THE DAMN FREE WAY!” her anger issues always made you giggle, but the way her jaw clenched had you folding. you hear her phone ring, she signals you to answer it. unlocking her phone, you see a text from jen “hrry up unnieee manchae alr went to her parents place >:( “ you look over to her, awaiting her response “ugh.. just ignore her.”
as soon as the car gets in a parking space, chaewons rushing out her door, opening yours and carrying you bridal style to the rest of the girls. “finally! unnie, we’ve bee- woah.” yunjin starts to scold the leader before her eyes land on you. kazuha and sakura observe your features quietly. chaewon places you on your feet, panting from the running. “s-sorry.. fuck- we got.. lost?” the girls weren’t even listening to what she was babbling about. “H-hello.. im gay! wait fuck- im kazuha.. its nice to meet you, uh?” her face flushed as she shakily sticks out her hand to you “ im yn.. wow you’re so pretty.. and those muscles, are you single? ” you jokingly say, grabbing her hand with both of yours, the poor girl stops functioning as shes pushed to the side by yunjin. “ hi tits! um- yn! yeah- oh shit im sorry… wait no- im yunjin and thats sakura over there ” you giggle at her slip up before leaning closer and pulling her down to your level, “ first meeting and you’re obsessed with my boobs already.. ”
“ im so hard right now ”
“ what was that ? “
“ what? “
you move onto the last girl, sakura. holy shit shes gorgeous.
“hi ynnie, you look nice in red” she says with a sweet smile, making you swoon. “thank you unnie.. that suit would make anyone fold!”
the way you interacted with her members made chaewons breath hitch.. you’re hers… why are you whoring yourself out to her best friends? she noticed how sakuras eyes twinkled the moment they met with the sight of your figure.. it replayed in her mind every minute.. her ears perk up at zuhas question ,, so what are you to unnie, yn?”
“oh! sorry, im chae’s-“ she swiftly cuts you off “she’s a friend! a close friend of mine yeah..” the fuck? you want to protest, but stop as sakura responds, “that so? then you don’t mind if shes my date for the night, right?” she places a hand on your waist, pulling you close enough you could smell her perfume, and fuck, its intoxicating. you’re all caught off guard by her boldness “oooou im wet..” you mutter, praying to god she doesn’t hear you. “is that okay with you sweetheart?” she whispers to you, a sincere look in her eye, god she’s breathtaking… you slowly nod much to chaewon’s dismay, even if it was her fault this is happening, maybe if she wasnt ashamed of the relationship you guys have sakura wouldn’t be guiding you away to the restaurants doors. with clenched fists, she follows you and the rest of the girls, not before muttering curses to herself. chaewon hates the way you let sakura hold your hips, how close you’re sitting next to her, practically grinding against the older girls thighs in her eyes (you were a reasonable distance away from her)
she wanted to sit next to you but yunjin basically sprinted to the empty seat, pulling out your chair like the gentlewoman she is. chaewon hated how the girls smile shines at the simple words you spoke to her.
the room was filled with loud laughter and compliments being thrown toward your direction every 10 seconds. chaewons grip on her fork nearly made it break into millions of pieces, she was so focused on not dragging you out to the car that she didnt even look up at you, making you feel like shit “ ynnie !! are you alright ? you’re shaking really bad.. do you need anything?” not even getting a word out of your mouth before feeling a warmth embrace you, realizing it was kura’s jacket wrapped around you. “here.. though-“ and suddenly you’re up out of your seat and being led to the exit. “chaewon-“ “shut it.”
your bedroom door slams into the wall, nearly breaking it but chaewon could care less.. “so that’s it? you whore yourself out to my fucking friends? stupid fuckin bitch..” the rest is a mess of curses and degrading names towards you, she throws you on the bed, pinning you to it. she rips that stupid dress off “this wouldn’t have happened if you just introduced me as your damn girlfriend!” you feel her fingers trail up to your panties, “but no! you ju-“ she shoves the garment in your mouth, successfully cutting you off. “you were basically grinding on kkura unnie’s thighs.. you wish you were dating her instead huh?” chaewons hungrily kissing your neck, before trailing down to your pretty tits “maybe if you look like a dirty slut she won’t bat an eye at you” her hot tongue swirls around your perky nipples, hands gripping tightly at your thighs, leaving deep marks. you let out muffled gasps as you squirm underneath the older girl, feeling yourself get wetter by the second. youre clenching around nothing and searching for some sort of relief!! slowly grinding on chaewons exposed thigh, before she slaps your cunt.
she says no words, still nibbling at your sensitive skin, just glaring at you before returning her attention back to the task at hand. you throw your head back, whining into the panties as you plead for chaewon to touch you . she takes notice of how you hump the air so desperately, making her laugh in your face. “pfft- stupid slut.. only thinking about what she wants, huh?” the names she calls you make you scream, this is not something you thought you were into! “i wanna hear the slut bitch and moan, you got that? you’re nothing but my little sex doll i can throw around. ill use you til im satisfied..” she pulls the panties out of your mouth, throwing it in a random corner of the dark room. chaewon’s between your legs now, blowing air onto your needy cunt. “are you this wet because of me, or kkura unnie?” you shake your head in denial, “cmon… use your big girl words..” “n-no! chae- ah!” a quick slap at your folds catch you off guard,
“wrong name bitch.”
you whimper as she starts rubbing your clit “f-fuck! ‘m sorry m-mommy! haa—“ she slowly licks up from your entrance to the clit, making your eyes roll to the back to of your head! she slips her tongue inside, teasing you as she halts all movement. “mmha… mommy… more.. p-please!” she moves her tongue side to side for a bit before completely pulling away. “did you really think id let you get close to cumming you slut? mommy thought you were smarter than that… damn, kkura unnie wouldn’t like a disobedient girl like you..” shes smirking in your face, straddling you and putting one of your legs on her shoulder. slowly, she grinds her puffy pussy onto yours, earning whines and squeals from you. “ghaa! mm- fuck.. m-mommy!!” you drench both of your bottom halves in your squirt, letting out choked moans of her name followed by curses. “cumming so mmgh.. soon? needy bitch, shit!- we’re not even starting yet!” she rubs her cunt against yours faster now, pressing down harder to get her closer. feeling your clits hit each other makes you cry out, bringing you to your second release of the night. chae ups her pace, using your overwhelmed cunt to her hearts content. “mommy! s’too much!! s-stop!-“ your right cheek flashes a new red color, “you’ll take it like a good girl, does mommy have to train your stupid ass again?” she grumbles, focused on squirting all over your sweaty body, maybe then kkura won’t want you. “argh!- fuck!” finally satisfied with her work, she coats you in her scent! shes riding out her orgasm on your overspent, puffy little cunt. you’re busy babbling about something she could care less about, then she gets an idea.
“hey whore, open wide! if you make me cum ill call someone over~”
she gives you milliseconds to react before shoving her glistening pussy on your face. muffled moans vibrate through her core, making her clench her plush thighs around your head. your minds fuzzy, but a pretty girl is using you for her own pleasure ! score in your book! shes cutting off your circulation with how her thighs practically embrace your head in a soft prison but you’re glad you’re a prisoner. “fuck.. making mommy do all the work now? alright then.” she hastily grinds her fat cunt on your open mouth, feeling your nose hit her clit with each motion. chaewons screaming at this point, ‘fuck the neighbors!’ is what she lives by. “ugh!! shit- mmghaa! take it all! drink mommy’s cum!” she squeals before cumming hard on your face, you barely manage to take all of her slick. chaewon slows down her grinding until she halts all movement, finally letting you have some air.
“ugh- fuck.. did you really call over your homegirls?” you groan, feeling like you just got ran over fifty times.
“yeah, just one though. and shes your favoriteee” she says playful before making you look at the now open door
“hi baby.. hope chaewonnie wasn’t too harsh on you..”
“oh suck my fat-“ kkura throws her jacket at her face, shutting the girl up,
“shhh shhut the fuck up.. anyway, got more for me sweet girl? cmon baby, let mommy hear your pretty voice..”
hi my lovessss i missed you guys :(((( how r you ? wahhh this is my longest post yet😭 im sorry if my last posts felt.. bland? ive been struggling with ideas for these reqs lately, i feel like ive written the same thing just with different idols.. but i really enjoyed writing this one <3 !! ill be more active this week since i really do owe it to you guys
Stay safe and I love you lots !!
- Vicky 💋
#anon ask#vicky’s asks#wlw#lesserafim smut#kim chaewon x reader smut#kim chaewon smut#miyawaki sakura smut#kim chaewon x reader
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tged webtoon ep 163 spoilers and thoughts that are making me procrastinate on like all of my work but its totally fine below the cut
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i am so serious i was completely tricked into thinking this would just be a light episode with some ominous foreshadowing but still some answers for how to defeat fate. i thought we'd be in silly haha territory now and that soon we'd reach the end and everything would be wonderful now and they can finally have what they want. I WAS PROVEN WRONG
YOU. YOU TRICKED ME FROM THE GETGO BY SETTING THE MOOD OF THE EP TO BE SILLY OFF THE BAT. YOUR STUPID CUTE HAIR BEING MESSY WHEN U WAKE UP AND THOSE SILLY ASS D*SNEY ANIMALS. YOU YOU YOU YOU RAPHAEL YOU FOOLED ME
it's super cute and funny that his singing and his general demeanor is so fairytale esque that animals and people just love him even though he tried to destroy what they were working on . he looks adorable with messy hair. i wanna see it more. cute and blond. but also. FUCK YOU
like we went from that to this and i was like "oh my god they're gonna have a bonding moment" and i was so so happy i just,, i really thought,,,,
like he looks so pretty here!! and then javier says something so sweet and so javier-brand of affectionate and they're being funny about it and it's so cute and they're all smiley afterward in the reflections of the water so its like "awww stupid fucking idiots being happy at each other without even really knowing it i love them so much" AND THEN.
STUPID FUCKING OMINOUS REFLECTION GOT ME ALL WORRIED. BUT THEN I THOUGHT OF RAPHIE AT THE START AND WENT "nahhh thats just. yknow. the normal foreshadowing at something bigger. they haven't even gotten answers yet. it's fine" oh lynn. oh girl you had no idea.
like they're so close to the truth cmon they wouldnt dump what they need to do to stop fate AND whats going on w javier at the same time right? ha. ha. ha.
ominous panels aside POOR LLOYD,,, OF ALL THE SECRETS HE COULD HAVE CHOSEN,,, he had no idea its not fair </3 we got blushy lloyd as a result i love this panel btw he's very very cute. super duper bug of him. i really like that the artist has been drawing the two of them at this angle a lot recently they look so stupid i like it a lot
ALSO JAVIER DO YOU. HAVE SOMETHING YOU WANT TO SAY. WHY DID HE ASK THAT I. JAVIER U CANT JUST ASK PEOPLE HOW DEE- WHAT THE FUCK
and then we got hit w javier being worried and i was like "man me too buddy, im worried too but im sure itll be oka-"
DEATH FLAG. WHY. WHY DID YOU HAVE TO THINK THAT LLOYD OH GOD. i read this and my worry that was briefly washed away IMMEDIATELY came back . tged is very good at giving me tonal whiplash. i dont think thats a bad thing but also its not good for my health either so. /lh
AND THEN WE GOT HIT WITH THE JEWEL OF TRUTH SECTION AND. AAAAHHH AAAAAAAAHHH the darkness that lloyd is in, he's all alone when he hears this god i . oh god i have so much to say okay
it's kind of hard to go shot by shot with this section because all my thoughts are overlapping with each other but ill try my best???
he's immediately pushed into communication between just him and the jewel and shrouded in a very very isolating darkness. there's so so so much empty space and all my yapping about how much lloyd has been isolating himself for the sake of finally protecting his loved ones kind of comes to a head here. and then we hear the truth...
lloyd is a BUG. the fact that he EXISTS is a problem that has been the catalyst of all the pain and work that he and javier have had to go through, so so early in the story. he's essentially being told that its HIS fault fate is threatening their lives. AND WOW THAT HURTS. how do you cope with being told that?? how do you manage that???
and on TOP of it all, in order to fix it, he has to choose. rid the world of this bug, or let the bug take over. THAT'S SO EVIL
the only way to protect his loved ones is to forfeit his protection over them, giving up his life. and yet the only way for him to continue being there to protect them is to lose the life of the one he absolutely loves most, javier. WHAT THE FUCK. WHAT THE FUCK WHY WOULD THEY DO THAT
the moment he hears this he falls to his knees. im so fucking ill IM SICK . THIS IS SICK AND TWISTED!!!!!!!!!!!
some more thoughts on the language and just. inherent despair of this section:
i think the choice of calling lloyd a bug is so so so heartwrenching. i don't know if it's an intentional thing by the writer/adapter or if it's just something they defaulted to since the world is considered a system, but either way it makes me so damn emotional
i'm a computer engineer, so i take some computer science classes too as part of my major, and one of those fun facts that you learn in those classes is that debugging/bugs became common terminology in compsci for a very silly reason. "bugs" as a word to describe error and defects had been present before, but it became conflated with programming due to a team of programmers actually finding a moth, a true to life Bug, interfering with their computer and thus messing with their program.
see, the JoT could have called lloyd anything. an error, a mistake, a problem, hell even a glitch would have worked. but they specifically said bug (and again whether or not thats intentional is up for debate but i will treat it like it is)
and the thing about bugs, the thing that haunts me now, is that without them the rest of the program (theoretically) works fine. if that moth hadnt entered the computer of those programmers, then their code would have been operating smoothly. the system would be chugging along well.
the knight of blood and iron would be functioning just fine.
yeah it'd be sad, yeah javier would have lost everyone, but it would have gone exactly as the program was written. the memory allocated for the class lloyd_frontera would be freed, and the story wouldn't have had to call on it, ever. but lloyd, the bug, the moth, stuck around. errors ensue.
and often, bugs are HUMAN error. it's a problem in a human design, not a natural glitch or mistake. the moth wouldn't have been able to enter that computer if it was built differently. bugs do not appear naturally. and they do not go away until you go back to where the bug appears and FIX IT. lloyd cannot fix the story, he can NEVER achieve the happy ending he's always wanted, because the program will always be bugged because of HIM.
suddenly too, all the little changes that have happened in the story thus far make so much sense. all of those events happening EARLIER than they should have completely tracks.
the choices lloyd made - to defeat neumann, defeat lacona, go to cremo, go to the capital - pushed javier's presence ahead, and i know that's like really really obvious, but coupled with this bug analogy i feel insane because
something that's very common in programming in general are function calls, where on the side you have the function written out all complete, and in your main code you can just say the name of the function. when it compiles, itll know what to refer to when it sees the name in your main code.
something else thats very common is conditionals! y'know, your classic "if (comparison here) then do (this thing here) else (do this thing here)", you might have seen this before (or not, im not sure how well versed tged tumblr is on programming which is why im explaining this)
and u think back to javier being there EARLY and oh. ooohh....
if (javier.location == magentano.event_location(banquet)) {
kyle_betrayal(alicia);
}
this function, this betrayal, was called early. THIS WAS CALLED EARLY because a certain character object, lloyd frontera, changed the state of javier's location way sooner than it should have happened. a bug. a bug. a bug. a bug made the code jump to this conditional. he's been a bug this whole time
and you think to when the glitches on javier first started appearing and oh. oooohhh. the object referred to as javier, disabled the "protagonist" variable on him and passed it onto lloyd. but that won't do, because all these functions for the ENTIRE STORY rely on javier's class object. how can it call on lloyd instead? lloyd should have been freed, aka the memory storing his little array of data, should have been REMOVED. CAUSE HE WAS SUPPOSED TO DIE
theres more examples of this throughout the whole story that maybe ill list another day (as much as im yapping about it, its really not that hard/deep on figuring out where things were called early lol) but yeah yeah yeah. yeah this is so so evil and i cant believe i didnt put two and two together earlier. this analogy is SO EVIL WHY WOULD THEY DO THIS TO ME
apologies for the jargon btw. i have no idea if i explained this right or if anyone else really knows what im talking about but i've been losing it over this for the entire weekend ALKDFJLSDKF
WHATS WORSE IS THAT IVE BEEN CALLING LLOYD A BUG FOR LIKE. ACTUAL MONTHS. I WOULD REFER TO HIM AS A CREATURE AND AS A LITTLE ITTY BITTY BUG AND NOW I FEEL SO SO TERRIBLE BECAUSE HE REALLY WAS A BUG. I MADE A SHITPOST AND EVERYTHING (that ill prolly post later) THAT I HAD NO IDEA WOULD. AGE POORLY SOB SOB SOB
I AM SO SO SORRY LLOYD. I DIDN'T KNOW I DIDN'T KNOW I DIDN'T KNOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
sniffle,,, sob,,, anyway,,, thats enough yapping about bugs and programming and lloyd being a bug,,, back to the anguish
the following section is just. god ow ow OW. the shaking linework, the shadows setting in at the top with the dramatic bottom lighting, and the blur on javier as he loses focus and starts truly, truly panicking makes me INSANE. artist you're making me CRAZY!!!
javier truly has no idea either but god dammit he's trying his best to help, but how can lloyd explain this to the man whos completely and utterly loyal to him to the point of sincere devotion? if lloyd tells him, whos to say that javier - the martyr that he is - won't just give up his life for him? god that's so... GOD. GOD GOD GOD WHY AGHHH
AND AGGHHH AGGGHHHH THE FLASHBACKS TO THE P PANELS OF SUHO WORKING SO SO HARD TO REACH THE LIGHT. GOD FUCK. FUCK FUCK FUCK
ITS DIMMER ITS HARDER TO REACH AND OH MY GOD THE PANEL OF LLOYD REACHING UP EVEN IN HIS PANIC TOWARDS HOPE. THE THOUGHT THAT "ITLL GET BETTER ONE DAY" COMFORTED HIM AND KEPT HIM ALIVE BUT NOW ITS BEING RIPPED FROM HIM I FEEL ILL. EVIL EVIL EVIL EVIL
this panel of that light going out . not much words on this i just feel sick to my stomach. why would u do that.
and finally at the end of the chapter we have this incredibly HAUNTING panel of lloyd panicking. the despair here is UNREAL. the lineart is shaken and messy and scribbly, and the focus on his face and his hand gives the panel a very claustrophobic and hard-to-breathe feel and it makes mE SICK!!! IT MAKES ME SICK!!! SICK AND TWISTED!!!! JEWEL OF TRUTH I HATE YOU!!!!!!!
anyway that's all my thoughts for right now . i really really hope they figure out a loophole or something . if they dont im actually gonna keel over and die /j not literally but yknow what i mean
SICK AND TWISTED!!! is my final word on this ep
thanks for joining me in hell ill see yall next week salute emoji
#tged#the greatest estate developer#tged spoilers#the greatest estate designer#lynn misc#lynn yaps#i really really hope people understood all that coding stuff i spewed in the middle of this HAHA#IF NOT PLEASE DONT BE AFRAID TO ASK. I LOVE YAPPING ABOUT STUFF I KNOW!!!#i didnt think id yap abt it that much but well. here we are#i was close to if not completely sobbing when i read this ep and i am extremely scared of whats next#itll be okay though right? no more anguish after this? right? <- trying so hard to cope
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i don’t want you like a best friend - M.S
summary: bestfriend!matt and “bestfriend”!reader at a party with unknown desires for eachother.
warnings: p in v, unprotected sex, lots of smut, shower sex, swearing, underage drinking, very few uses of y/n (I tried to put it in here no times but I couldn’t!! I’m so sorry omgggg I hate it too dw 😭)
may make you get mad: “that’s not fitting.” “I’ll make it.” I know. I hate this too but his dick is like seven inches and tbh any girl would be lucky to have all seven inches regardless of height. also I’m new to smut writing so I may suck at explaining shit and have horrid grammar. I myself don’t know what (juno) position they are in but I’m too lazy to fix it so.. finally, “pretty sounds” cringy af but I used moan and groan and idk what else there is
if u wanna take inspo from this (thank you!) idc as long as you don’t copy my entire thing. but if your under 18 fuck off, no smut for you 👎
word count: idfk?? find out yourself xx
(this isn’t gonna be realistic, I’ve never been to a party or hooked up with anyone before so 😭 I feel a lot of us here on Tumblr haven’t. we’re saving ourselves for Matt 😭😭😭)
(this is my first time writing a smut fanfic, first sturniolo fanfic and first Tumblr fanfic! sorry it might be bad, not proofread. just trying out writing instead of reading!)
(english is NOT my first language. if I spelled a word wrong or something DONT BLAME ME, LOVE MADE ME CRAZY. (iykyk))
I ACCIDENTALLY CHANGED IT TO I INSTEAD OF YOU HALFWAY THROUGH OH MY GOD IM SO FUCKING SORRY IM DUMB AF
You were just hanging out with one of your friends, gossiping about the latest rumors around your school when you got an invite to the biggest party of the year. Thrown by the one and only sturniolo triplets, they were known for throwing the most lavish parties and sneaking in drinks for everyone to have. Their parties also earned the reputation of the place to hook up. You and the triplets were best friends, but you were especially close with Matt. You secretly have a desire for Matt that no one knows, not even your best friends. When you saw the invitation you squealed. “f/n, we need to go shopping for dresses, right now!” And so you did, you went to every store when you found the perfect dress. A short dress with a black dress part and gold straps and trim. It was perfect, but you could only imagine Matt taking it off.
you and your friend arrived at the part around 9:00pm. The lights are on and music is blasting, even from outside. You and f/n park at the end of the 50-ish line of cars. You finally step into the party and are immediately greeted with booming music and a drink to start, you take the drink and glance around at everyone. The party had only started 30 minutes ago but people were already on the dance floor. You scanned the crowd specifically looking for one person. Matt. “Girl who are you looking for? You’ve been to these parties before, come on!” F/n yells over the loud music, yanking your arm and entering the dance floor. You started having sips out of your drink, and sat down at the kitchen island. “Hey! I’ve been looking for you for so long, where were you?” You turn around to see Matt, in a leather jacket and pants, you glance up and down at his body. Shocked on how good he looks. “oh, my friend just pulled me to the dance floor, I was looking for you too!” You giggle, while your hands begin to shake trying to maintain eye contact and not dick contact. “you? on the dance floor?” Matt teased “don’t even right now.” you tried to hide your grin as he kept teasing and laughing at you.
the time with Matt went by so fast. Your conversation lasted around an hour before you both realized how long you had been talking, and the party was livelier than ever, you and Matt had been pulled back onto the dance floor. The amount of people in the crowd was making your body be thrown around like you were in a washing machine. You finally caught up to matt, who was significantly taller, making it easier for him to get through. “Jesus Christ, it’s like a mosh pit in there.” You laughed “that’s because it is a mosh pit.” Matt informed you. You glanced up at Matt when you heard yelling from behind, you turned around to see Nick and Chris fighting for approximately the 1989th time. “No, cause-!” Chris was cut off by Matt’s yell for them to stop. “whatever, I’m gonna go get some a drink, you guys want any?” I said in annoyance by the mosh-pit-like crowd. “nah- jinx!”Nick and Chris said at once, then continued to fight over who said “jinx” first. “I’ll come, I’ll have to protect you from the crowd or else you’ll get trampled.” Matt chuckled. I chuckled back, but what he didn’t know is that that sentence sent butterflies through my stomach.
I opened the cabinet to grab another bottle of liquor and was only a centimetre away from the bottle, even in my tippy toes. Matt was on his phone, and I didn’t want to bother him, so I just tried to get it myself. I groaned in annoyance at the fact I couldn’t grab it myself, so I climbed onto the counter. I finally caught the bottle and was about to climb down when my foot slipped and I fell, but I didn’t fall. someone caught me?
Matt. motherfucking matthew sturniolo caught me, he is my best friend but still. I was in his arms looking up into his eyes like a dumb puppy. I was so stunned that I didn’t even realize the entire bottle of liquor emptied onto my dress. “shit- sorry.” I say as I try to stand up and clean myself off with the nearby paper towels. “no it’s fine, I should have helped you-“ Matt tries to say “no no Matt it’s okay, my fault entirely. how dumb did I have to be to climb up there?” I apologize, Matt chuckles “we don’t have much paper towels, let’s get you cleaned up” Matt says as he grabs my arm and pulls me toward the bathroom. “here you go-“ Matt says as he hands me a handful of toilet paper. with any other person I would be fine with the setting, but not with Matt. being in the bathroom with Matt probably seemed normal to everyone except me. it seemed like a fanfiction, a dream. I’m so lost in thinking about how romantic it is that he - MATTHEW STURNIOLO is in the bathroom with me, that I didn’t even think to look up. But much to my surprise Matt was staring right at my eyes. “oh-sorry. your eyes are just really pretty, whoever is your boyfriend in the future would be lucky to have you” Matt stutters, I freeze. did Matt just say, I’m pretty? “o-oh! thank you Matt” I smile blushing like a ripe-RIPE tomato. Matt giggles, I glance over and I realize that 10 seconds ago I swear the bathroom door was open, but now it’s closed. I look back at matt and he must have saw the lust in my eyes, and I saw the lust in his. I could tell that look, even if I haven’t hooked up with anybody before. the look of lust, wait no- love.
I stutter “m-Matt? why’d you close the do-“ “you know y/n.” Matt says while putting his hand on my cheek. I lean into him, he leans into me. and in that moment, I kiss him. I know, me, kissing Matt? but no, it’s happening. right now, I close my eyes and just stop thinking. it feels like both me and Matt are stunned at what we’re doing, but it both feels magical. He pulls me in and turns so my back is leaning against the sink counter. we let go of the kiss and Matt moves his hand toward my hip, and placing the other on my shoulder, fiddling with my dress strap. I place one hand on the back of his neck and one on his belt. I lean in again but Matt leans into my neck and starts playfully kissing it. I let out a small groan and start fidgeting with his belt. “matt-“ I try to say but matt cuts me off. “shh” matt whispers, and pulls my strap of my dress to the side of my shoulder. I fidget with Matt’s belt, but what I didn’t know is that it comes undone easily, and his pants are only held up by his belt. all of a sudden Matt’s belt crashes onto the floor and so does his pants. “fuck sorry Matt” I whisper. Matt pulls away and suggests me “how about I make us even? hmm?” I nod my head as he pulls a strap of my dress off, then the other. I put my hand under his shirt and slowly lift his shirt. Next thing I know my dress is on the ground and Matt’s shirt and pants are on the ground and Matt is turning on the shower.
Matt steps into the shower and throws his boxers off and out of the shower, I undress slowly but get pulled into the shower by Matt, still in my underwear. “I couldn’t wait.” Matt says seductively. I glance down and freeze. “like what you see?” Matt chuckles “that is not fitting.” I speak “I’ll make it” Matt whispers. he places his hands on my underwear and glides it off grinning. Matt grabs my hips and pins me against the foggy, cool glass. I place my hands on his checks and start kissing him. Matt pulls me closer and bites my lip, making me groan. He takes a hand off my hip and onto his dick, and starts teasing me with his dick, I can’t help but moan. My lips let go from his as I bite my lip. “there you go, keep making those pretty sounds for me.” Matt moans as he slides his length into my pussy, I practically scream at how good it feels, my head flings back in pleasure as he wraps my legs around him. He holds my body and bounces it to reach maximum pleasure, with each bounce, he goes faster. And so do my moans. I’m moaning as fast as I can and as loud as I need, I’m positive other people can hear but I don’t care. I can feel the knot in my stomach start to build up. “m-Matt g-gonna c-“ I stutter before creaming all over Matt’s veiny, throbbing dick. Screaming at how good it feels. Matt keeps me bouncing on his dick, just waiting for himself to cum. He starts moaning and I knew what was about to come (see what I did there 🤭)”shit y/n I’m about to co-“ Matt gets interrupted by my moans of his cum filling my walls, painting them white. “oh my fuck- I” I stutter before Matt lifts me off his dick and onto the ground. I land on my knees, panting like a dog. “oh my god, that felt so good.” I moan, Matt puts his hand on my chin and pulls my face towards him. “just wait for the car.”
#matt sturniolo#chris sturniolo#nick sturniolo#sturniolo triplets#matthew sturniolo#sturniolo smut#smut
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Hellooo~
I just found your blog rn and I immediately fell in love with your works(especially sukuna ffs).
I love the way you write sukuna and reader's relationship.
And if ur ok with it, may I request a sukuna x reader angst? Maybe where reader is a sorcerer and she got badly injured and got into a almost death situation during a fight and sukuna is smh guilty for it??
You can ignore this if u want to<3
-🍪
Author's note : Hi hi ( ꈍᴗꈍ)oh my gosh im so happy to hear that!!!thank you so much darling!it makes me super happy
Mhm,i love the smell of fresh angst with happy ending in the midnight lmao. I'll gladly write it!! Hope you enjoy this,Cookie-chan!
Warnings : Sukuna Sorcerer au!,angst,injury and blood,happy ending!
*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘
You knew this would happen,and you were happy to rub it in your idiot boyfriend's face with a big "i told you so."
That is,if you make it out alive.
The curse before you lets out a loud noise, something akin to cackle,as it watches you with it's multiple eyes. You glare,but even you know it's lost all heat;with blood oozing out of each part of your body,you can barely even keep your eyes open. Your body feels weak,and all of your joints hurt like hell. Your eyes drift to where you broken phone is laying and you just hope that your help signal has gone through before it was damage for good.
"ah," you mumble as you spit a mouthful of blood on the ground below; watching as it drips down on your hands, "today sucks. Its all Ryo's fault."
Your hazy eyes turn up and you watch as the curse dances around;each one of it's disgusting eye spinning around wildly as it looks at you with glee.
The son of a bitch is having fun killing you.
"you're lucky, y'know," you giggle slightly from how slurred your words sound; the blood lose making you lightheaded, "If Ryo was here,he would've torn you to pieces. But, he's an idiot."
Because he really was; starting that morning with the message from the higher ups about your new mission, you had told Sukuna that it would end badly. You had told him more than twice that something smelled fishy;that the higher ups were out to get you. But Sukuna,had dismissed your worry,and with a small scoff had said you're paranoid. At least,now with you dead,he would be proven wrong.
You grin maniacally at the thought;serves him right.
Leaning your back against the tree,you watch with bleary eyes as the curse steps closer;you dont even care. You're too tired to fight back. So you just sit there, thinking about all the things you'll miss;your friends and family,that one bakery with those delicious coconut buns,your boyfriend Sukuna,and most of all-
"i never got the chance to hear him say i love you..."
Maybe out of everything, you'll regret not dating your boyfriend sooner.
You're so lost in your thoughts,that you dont notice the sound of the curse has been faded away. And when you hear a small shriek,and hurried footsteps running your way,you just close your eyes and drop your head. You're fully expecting the curse to rip out your heart,when gentle,but frantic hands,take hold of your bloody cheeks and raise your head slightly. With a pained groan,you open your eyes just enough to see a heap of pink,and a familiar pair of red eyes.
"Ryo...?"
"yeah,yeah babe. Its me," his voice is steady,like always,but you can hear a small undertone of worry and it brings a smile to your lips.
"told ya..."
The hands on your cheeks rub at the corner of your lips to wipe away the blood.
"yeah,i know. And I'm an ass for not believing you." You feel yourself shift,and with foggy mind, realize he has lifted you up in his arms, "I'll make it up to you. Promise."
You giggle and rub your head against his chest;his scent already soothing your mind.
"can i have those sweet buns then?with hot chocolate?"
"whatever you want. First, let's get you fixed up yeah?"
You mumble your agreement and close your eyes. And when you wake up the next time,its to a tray full of your favorite sweet buns and a warm mug of hot chocolate.
Your boyfriend embraces you tightly,and kisses your forehead.
"i love you."
And maybe getting almost killed,was worth it after all.
*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘
P.S : I love coconut buns and im currently craving some so i had to add them lmao.
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WOAH! THE CREW???? THE CREW FROM HIT FANFICTION NO THING DEFINES A MAN LIKE LOVE??? WOAH WOAH WOAH??? Anyway yes omg its them!!! This took me so long and im so tired but look at my ANGELS!
UM! Friendly reminder that I myself am not Inuit/Indigenous! I did research + had an Indigenous person helping me w the tattoos, but if theres anything wrong/disrespectful pls do let me know and I will fix it. All the tattoos r on a seperate layer so it'll be an easy fix and one i am more then happy to do. A few of the designs changed between this and my written description, so... Oops?? Especially Morqa. I got carried away ok.... ANYWAY I have some little notes abt their designs here and there so! Kaiqa: He used to have shorter bangs around his face but they annoyed him so he tried to let them grow out but that annoyed him so he would cut them again and then try to let them grow out and now he just has perpetual baby hairs that wont get any longer. Mikla: UM. Not much to say here. Isnt he pretty tho?? Buteq: SOMEHOW ENDED UP THE MOST MAJESTIC MAN EVER. HELLO?? The two beads on the right are for his nieces and the one on the left is for his sister! Neter: One time he got super cocky abt being 7 years older then Nitya which meant he was a better fighter and so Nitya was like "yeah?? ok bet." and then punched him and broke his nose and was like "hm where are those warrior reflexes?" so now Neter has a permanently bent nose. Sorqai: He got the scar thats through his beard in the same raid that cause Nitya and Konait (Kaiqas older brother) to die. Nitya died trying to get Konait and some other kids out of the mess, and Sorqai got injured trying to get to them to help. He's mostly numb on that side of his face due to nerve damage ! Causes him to lisp a bit, especially w the chipped tooth (which he got from tripping) Natai: He wears both his own and Nitya's necklaces their parents made them, and intends to only take of Nitya's and let it go into the ocean where he was buried when the war is over. His own way of keeping Nitya involved in the war effort, something that was really important to him. Kutai: Again, no real notes here but isnt he pretttyyy..... Kovak: Honestly, very likely one of my favourite character designs I've ever made. Im kind of obsessed with him. He doesnt wear his necklace from his parents because he wasnt on good terms with them at all while they were alive. He took it off before they died, and hasnt been able to bring himself to put it back on. he intends to give it to his kid when he gets back. Mori: UM! I dont have a lot of notes here. Mori has two kids ! Hence the three tattoos under their chin, I saw an inuit creator/source say that sometimes people will add lines as they have kids and I thought that was really lovely so yes!! Again im just. I think hes so pretty. Luqait: Im so sorry king I did u dirty posting this after that one chapter. Each one of the beads he wears is dedicated to someone he knew in the tribe who died, theres more not visible on the other side of the braids. I can say for 100% certainty theres one for Kya and Nitya. Saila: Saila was actually a design i struggled a lot with, but I think I got them to a point im happy with!!! They're a good amount intense, androgynous and also have that amber flash in their eyes. The amber comes from having Fire Nation somewhere in their ancestry, something I dont think will really come up in the fic, but a detail I think is good to know! Morqa: I changed Morqa's design the most, especially his hair! But I think he's ended up being a design I am most proud of. The piercings especially!! Eventually u will run out of space (that we can see ig??) king but today is not that day godbless.
OKAY! THERE WE GO... I HOPE EVERYONE LIKES THEM UM PLS BE NICE AND DONT REPOST AND IDK JUST.... I HOPE U LIKE THEM AS MUCH AS I DO i know oc's in fics arent always peoples favourites but the reception of these guys has been like. Beyond mindblowing. Im so fucking excvited and happy everytime people in my comments talk about how much they love the characters i've created. Like.... The fact that people enjoy the OC's and not just for what the give to Zuko, but for what they give to each other and their own individual stories is so incredible to me. I hope u guys like this and I hope it helps u visualise them better!! : D
#mushy rambles#no thing defines a man like love fic#atla#avatar: tla#atla fanfics#avatar fic#atla fic
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hello gorgeous! if you doesn't mind, i have an idea. yk this cliche where 1 person makes another jealous just to fire them up and to make them confess their feelings/make out/have sex. i'm always conflicted bc yes i'm a flirty person myself but if someone does it to me? cty instantly. so can you imagine daemon making reader (who's the one he knows he will marry or they're just betrothed) jealous a lot bc he's a big shit and wants her to pay all her attention to him. but he didn't thought about oh. she's cold and strong-willed. so instead of some love making she ignores him for weeks if not months not even saying go back to your whores (sorry). just want him to beg for her love and attention bc that's what he deserves. idk about smut but angst. love angst and having power over powerful men. thank u in advance! take care!
It Takes Two
Daemon Targaryen x Reader
Summary: Just because you knew Daemon flirted as though it was a sport his life depended on, didn't mean he would not meet the flames of your wrath.
Word Count: 1k+
Warnings: daemon being a man 🤢, fem!reader, wife!reader, gaslight gatekeep girlboss, fluff, typos, etc.
A/N: HI NONNIE im blushing over here with you calling me gorgeous. I love me some good old fashioned 'oh no the consequences of my actions' and a good femme fatale i hope you like it lovie HELP IT ACCIDENTALLY TURNED INTO FLUFF IM SO SORRY I DONT HAVE THE BRAIN POWER TO FIX IT sigh i guess its what God intended because my last daemon fic was dark af Tagging: @pinksirensong @deniixlovezelda @targeryenmoony @ly--canthrope Part 2 "Since You Asked So Nicely"
He sees me from atop his horse. He is already smirking because of the ladies circled around him. He only cares to dismount after I walk away. "Slow down!" Daemon calls chuckling, removing his stupid headpiece, discarding it without a care. When he manages to grab me, I turn and crush my heel onto his foot. He lurches back in pain, snorting angrily as he watches me walk away for the second time. He manages to grab me again, only this time, he is seething and has his hands locked on both my shoulders, "what has inspired your anger this time, wife?" My nostrils in anger. I shove his iron clad chest away from me, but he does not budge, "ask your admirers, prince." Daemon's lips quirk. He releases me. I storm away. He laughs as he calls a servant, instructing him to retrieve his helmet before he follows after his enraged dragon lover.
Daemon could no longer mask that he had been annoyed, no, worried, that up till now, the doors have not opened, and the person he had been waiting for all night has not arrived.
"Is something wrong, my prince?" the woman states in a ditzy manner.
She had been a pastime, a pawn in his game. She had grown honest with the alcohol, now unable to mask the fact she was, in fact, flirting with him. He liked her better when she talked about her dress, not that he could care any less about it. But at least she sounded like she knew what she was talking about, and not like she was measuring each word she would speak before it was spoken.
Daemon does not offer her a word in regard before walking away.
He walks up to the guard that should not be in the banquet this evening, not alone, and surely not enjoying it, as though he should not be on duty.
"Elias!" the prince calls, making the man chatting with someone, turn and straighten at the sight of him walking over.
"My prince," Elias nods in regard, lowering the cup he hand in hand slightly.
"Where is the princess?" he quips, "why are you here when she is not?"
The princess' guard shakes his head and shrugs, "she is in your chambers. Rowan is keeping guard."
Daemon's brows tighten in annoyance, "she's not finished changing still?"
The guard tilts his head, "my prince, she will not be in attendance of the banquet this eve."
"What?"
"Did she not tell you?" he mutters, "she said that she felt faint and did not want to go."
Daemon's face hardens.
Without another word, he storms out of the banquet hall.
I turn to the door from the page of the book my eyes were on when I hear it burst open.
Daemon is heaving when he stills just outside the door.
"Has something happened?" I ask, with no real interest.
The prince marches over to me. I watch him up until he sits by my side and places a hand on my forehead, "are you ill?"
I push his hand away, "no."
"Are you with child?"
I roll my eyes, closing the book in my hand, "wouldn't you like that."
"Then why are you not at the banquet, by my side?"
"Hmp," I shift, turning my body to him, "I did not know you were expecting me."
"You are my wife," Daemon grabs my hand, "everyone is expecting you to be at my side."
I hum, puling my hand away. I inch past him to place my book on the bedside table, "and tell me, husband, where you waiting in earnest or with some woman by your side?"
He does not speak a word.
I scoff at him, shaking my head as I pull back and scooch down under the covers, "that is what I thought."
I snap at him when gets to his feet and rips my blanket off me.
"I've had enough of your games," he points at me, "you have been maddening as of late."
His words make me chuckle dryly. I knit my brows. "Is it I that has been playing games, Daemon?!" I quip, sitting back up, "you have been doing nothing but egg me on ever since your damned tourney and I've about had enough of you!"
I pull the blankets back up, only to have him pull it back down again.
"You know I only do this to get your attention," he says, kicking his shoes off.
I growl, swatting at him as I move to grab the blanket, "you are truly inept if you believe throwing yourself at another woman's feet will merit my attention or good graces."
He grabs the blanket from me and pulls at it, "I only meant to recreate the moment we had after the recent tourney, my love."
I practically steam in anger, releasing the blanket, making him topple back.
"If you are so desperate to recreate it that you resort to speaking with other women, then I do not want you anywhere near me!"
Daemon sighs as he crawls towards me on the bed.
I kick him off, "begone, cretin!"
Daemon, much like him, begins to find excitement in this, and even allows a smirk to play on his lips, "I love it when you call me names."
He manages to grab my leg. When he does so, he pulls me close and pins me down underneath him with his bodyweight.
"Get off!" I shove him off.
"My love," he sighs, grabbing my wrists, pressing them down beside my head, "quit the act-"
"Daemon, I swear to you, if you do not get off me this instant, I will not speak to you for an entire moon cycle."
He stills, looking down at me as he measures my words.
I raise my brows at him in challenge, "do you think I could not do it?"
It take a moments before he releases me. I could not help but gasp when he crumbles above me, sequentially nuzzling his head beside mine.
I clench my jaw at his unwanted affections, repeating more sternly, "get. off."
"You can't make me," he snips like a spiteful child.
I begin to struggle underneath him.
He whines out a desperate, "no!" He pushes down on me, nuzzling further into my shoulder. His breath is hot on my skin when he mutters something in High Valyrian that I do not understand.
I snip, "what was that?"
"I said I did not mean to actually upset you," he quickly admits.
I snort, "didn't you?"
"..."
I relax beneath him.
"... not like this."
"Then I demand an apology with tears."
"..."
"Daemon."
"Enough, I'm going to sleep."
"You are not sleeping in that," I push him off, catching him off guard. He begrudgingly rolls on his back and releases a dramatic sigh. I look at him and raise a brow, "get up right now, or I will make you get up."
He does not listen to a word I say.
The next moment, I have him off the bed. He falls with a yelp and a thud after I kick him.
Daemon rises on his knees eyeing me darkly as I pull the blankets over my me once more, "I told you so."
#daemon targaryen x reader#daemon fanfic#daemon targaryen#daemon x you#daemon x reader#daemon targaryen x you#house of the dragon fanfic#hotd fanfic#daemon targaryen fanfic#daemon fluff#daemon targaren fluff
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quackity married headcanons
(this is my second post! so if theres any errors just lemme know. the way reader is described as a female. uhm a few things before we start. the nickname “mami” and “mama” are used. for those who are still learning spanish. mami means mommy and mama means mom. but in hispanic culture calling someone “mami and mama” are also used as terms of endearment. im saying this bc i saw somewhere that those nicknames are not used and i was just there like “girl what🧍♀️”)
-ok, i see alex as a “yes ma’am” or “gentleman” type dude. so like if u were to ask him “hey can i please get me some water” he would say yes in a heart beat. or like if u were with ur friends and u ask for a pic, he would do it no complaining. stuff like that !!
-if you’re in like a bad mood. he would STILL be so respectful to u. but like obviously theres a point where he’s like “ok, i get ur mad but that hurt” but the way he would tell u is just so kindly. but if its like a small thing he would say stuff like some friends annoyed u “yes i know mami” and just agreeing with u.
-HE WOULD GET U THE PANDORA BRACELET🫶🏻 like omg he would get u it for u first anniversary and like its just so cute 😽. if u have any siblings, he would take them to get the bracelet and ask them the type of charms u like. but honestly he would know what u like better than ur sibiling 🤭.
-The type of music he plays WITH U specially would be 90s/2000s chicano music. you most likely showed him that type of music and now, he’s hooked. if u need some idea listen to the song “all my life” by MJ magic <3
-also…i see alex totally being into taking the 90s/2000s chicano type of picture?? like look it up on pictures and he would take those with u. like u guys a few of those of ur wedding and they’re so pretty <3
-speaking of wedding, the song u guys dacned at ur wedding was “hypnotized” by linda jones. and i know he mentioned he wasnt the best at dancing, but i think he would be good at doing slow dances
-GOSSIPING. all i gotta say. he loves it. especially like if u know spanish and you’re like “oye sabes lo que paso con mi amiga?” and he’s like “que👀?”
-whenever he comforts u, he would be so gentle. but he would still try to get something out of you because he wants to fix the problem.he would say stuff like “whats wrong, baby?” and sometimes u dont wanna talk. so he’s like “just say it?? lemme help” and well that stresses people out. but u always cave in.
-he’s a thigh/ass guy 🤭. and like i see him playfully slapping ur ass and giggling. or like when he drives his hand is on your thighs. <3
-he LIVES for you when he hears u giggle into kisses. he doesnt say anything but he just like “ohmygoshthatsactuallysocute”. and like he would do that thing- where its like, you guys are kissing and he puts your thighs around his waist🥲? idk how to discribe it but yea. also neck kisses/forehead kisses/and lip kisses r a must 👌🏻
(well thats all i can think of.im taking request so if y’all have anything im free!)
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#sometimes u have a day thats just so. i cant even. its seems 2023 is my year of rage#directionless rage. i guess im mad at me but instead of being directed inward it just goes out into empty space#im just fucking. im at my saturation point#its a good thing i stopped taking measurements yesterday and went to the store tomorrow bc im so fucking#mostly bc i noticed a problem with the code for a paper that is fucking less than a day away from being locked in on acceptance#and now its like fucking i have to go through and change a lot and im also less than 48hrs away from another massive project starting#that will occupy my whole fucking waking nightmare of a life. so its a good thing im level headed. its a good thing i can accept my fuck#ups with honestly. bc im so fucking. ive had it. im up to fucking here with everything and i just want it to be done#im fucking full of bitterness and black bile and i want to break things. and whose fault is it? fucking mine#bc im too fucking exhausted constantly all the time to fucking pay attention to what im doing and notic that a fucking function isnt#working properly. fuck u fuck u fuck u. so what r we gonna do abt it?#idk well see what my boss says. i already texted her that news and its good bc at least i caught it but god its so fucking irritating#god. will i b told off for this? maybe. i probably deserve it. haha if so that will send me for an absolute tailspin. i cannot stand to#feel ive done something wrong. even when i kno i have. last time i had a total freakout meltdown and made v bad choices and that wasnt even#this bad. so its a good thing im currently fairly stable bc the desire to make bad choices is very strong#im just so sick and tired of everything and i want to let things implode bc im vindictive against myself. but we must not do that we must#be reasonable. so idk we may have to withdraw the paper. whatever i dont give a fuck. itll get accepted elsewhere. i dont fucking care#leave me alone to dissolve into the dirt and set my data ablaze to be helpful to no one. erase my Prospective impack. i don't fucking care#anyway today sucked. i might have to stay up all night trying to fix this. ensuring that i fuck up the start of the looming project yayyyyy#i hate it here. i stopped having fun over a year ago#itll b fine. im just fucking. im full im impotent rage#unrelated
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*comes in dancing to hide the tears*
Soooo, a winion told me you have thoughts on Not sorry for loving you?
WE’RE SO BACK MY LOVE (i was the winion)
OKAY LETS GET GOING THANK YOU MY FRIEND
Not Sorry For Loving You
BOY, i was worried about this song & how it made the events play out considering the odyssey, and I’m satisfied enough with it and I have A LOT to say (i think)
First we start out with the same….tip-tap thingy instrument we had with Love In Paradise, but lower, which DEF is something specifically in music and I’m excited for the musican reactors on youtube start to react to it, and pick it apart (like major/minor)
But its an exact mirror of the beginning of Ody waking up at Calypsos island, is it because things on the island stay the same I wonder? Mhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh (its so beautiful)
Someone arrived today (HERMES , we can hear her take a breath and brace herself for what she has to tell Ody)
They said they′re taking you away (FUCKING FINIALLY, ITS ONLY BEEN WHAT, 7 YEARS???)
That you’re not mine to save (Oh…OH now this one…this can refer to several things 1. calypso “saved” him when he washed up on her island and patched him up 2. she thought she could “save” him from his dark thoughts and everything? “i can fix him” vibes? 3. shes talking about herself and “youre not the one who will safe me”)
And soon I won′t get to see your face (…….i know this probably because of rhyming purposes, but i like how this kind of implies she cares more about his looks than him xD)
So I came by to say (interesting, does she leave him alone completely, did she start leaving him alone after his breakdown at the cliff? or does she just not tend to go to the beach when hes sitting at the beach crying every day? mhhhhhh)
You’re unlike anyone I have ever known (…he is unique)
‘Cause you′re all I′ve ever known (…….thats just sad, i teared up at some part during the stream, im not sure if it was this or the end of charybdis,..but yeah)
WANGUIS VOCALS ARE BEAITUFUL; THE MUSIC- ITS
ITS SO GOOD, im in love
And if I pushed you
Or if I came on too strong (“if”, ok…miss hypothetical, and miss “i” messages, if she pushed him, he literally refused her from the start and she kept going and told him to bow down………….”if”, as in “thats what you say I did and maybe thats true but probably you made that up”, can i see this as her just now looking back and being like “yeah….maybe that was too much?”, maybe, but if this was the first time in seven years that she reflected on her own actions, then she has ISSUES still)
Or if I ambushed you (the song keeps things very vague, but I see this as a way for Jorge to semi-confirm the assault, or at least to not erase it, ive seen a lot of conflicting views on the song, from “not specfic enough about the SA as it should be” and “this song proofs that calypso is innocent” and Jorge probably found a way to let both interpreations co-exist, that being said I will be excited for animatics that will lean into the more Odyssey-accurate interpreation)
For that, I’ll say I was wrong (you say you were wrong, but you dont say you’re sorry for it?… aha)
And if you hate me (“if” you hate me, not like she FORCED him to stay on her island for SEVEN YEARS, girlie aint you the one trapped too in this interpretation? :) :) :) u should know how it feels, if you had ANY sympathy and goodwill for him at heart instead of selfishness you would’ve let him go years ago, like….7 years)
Then I am sorry my love′s too much for you (THIS is the biggest proof to me that this whole song is just BIG emotional manipulation, “my love is too much for you”, she blames HIM, for her feelings, like he is at fault that he cant deal with her emotions, instead of her being able to respect his boundaries and keep herself in check after his INSISTENT refusal), again the VOCALS THO
But I’m not sorry for loving you (eh, valid, but also rly guilt tripy, yk? You dont have to be sorry for your feeligns, but you have to be sorry about the way you act if it harms someone (WHICH YOU JUST TALKED BAOUT BUT DIDNT APOLOGIZE FOR, so shes not sorry for loving him, she - on some level – understands that she has hurt him, but she doesnt say shes sorry for her actions)
AND THEN A CHOIR to back her up? there was none in Love in Paradise, so its interesting that one appears now, is it because her emotions are stronger now and they’re overwhelming her? is she trying to use her godly power to convince him to stay? no matter what, they sound lovely, and i gasped when i first listened and had to replay it them, it does kind of sound like theyre trying to pressure ody
“Calypso-” THATS pretty much all he gets to say, MY HEART, he tries to speak, having let her vent that all out but…)
Let me speak (SHE INSTANT INTERRUPTS HIM?? THE AUDACITY? GIRL SHUT UP AND LET THE MAN SPEAK, another BIG red flag of this being a lot of emotional manipulation here, especially since she continues with giving her “sad sob story/explanation”, right after its like “yah i did bad but look at my sad story, this is why I did all this, you cant blame me)
I spent my whole life here (isnt it paradise calypso??? doesnt it have all that you want there, all that you need there?? mmhhhhhhhhHHHH someone was dishonest >:) )
Was cast away when I was young (sad, yeah i do feel bad for her about this, but that does not excuse her actions)
Alone for a hundred years (thats a long time i suppose, but for a goddess maybe not that much
I had no friends but the sky and sun (actually love that line)
So when you washed ashore I thought for sure that you were my dream come true (….ah, yes, that makes sense, latching onto the first good thing you come across, hopeless romantic, but being completely blind to the fact that the thing has free will, is actually a human with complex feelings and you were so obsessed with the IDEA of having someone who loved you that you extremely hurt them an,. ofc its the psychological explanation, of course she deserves better, but how she acted was NOT okay, no matter her reasoning)
I thought I knew (you knew…what? thats interesting that she doesnt end that line…and i honestly cant figure out what she implies there, she thoguht she knew that he loved her? that he DOESNT love her, she thought she knew what love felt like? what being loved felt like? OR thought she knew that he was a gift send by the gods? (as it is in the Odyssey iirc..Im not sure on this rn tho, so dont quote me)
The music…is so fricking beautiful in this….we have another refrain, but this time the choir backs her up on the words for “you, too strong, you, was wrong, me, and then the Uuh build up for the the not sorry for loving you”, which just emphases the words again i suppose, and makes her get more emotional? mhhhh not sure! it sounds great tho)
“Im not sorry”, so in the end, even IF she was wrong….shes not sorry, whatever she did to hurt him, the base line is, that she’s not sorry. She should be.
I′m angry and tired and restless and sad (valid feelings, but its all about how you express those…maybe you should get therapy)
I’m stuck in the moments I swore that we had (you swore, but maybe, maybe you just imagined them, because you were so desperate to believe there was actually any love from him, that you made yourself believe his rejections ended up being signs of love after all…thats not healthy, get therapy, rip to jorge tho, i believe i saw a thing that said he wrote it when he was in a low point in life, Id think hes better now, but still, unreciprocated love DOES hurt a lot, so ouchy)
I wish you would chase me (the way that you chase him….mhm)
Or try to embrace me (but he never does because even after SEVEN YEARS, he somehow hasnt warmed up yet….)
For once, I wish you would lie and say (……aha, like him lying would make any difference? because then you could make yourself believe that what you did wasnt wrong? that theres hope for you? girlie you have to learn to accept that, if you want him to lie to you, youre in a BAD spot. do fricking better.)
I love you (…………..okay……okay, so…..that line makes the whole song controversial….from the animatic we saw that right after these lines odysseus turns away with an empty/determined expression and no regret or guilt on his face what-so ever, and we can also hear that his voice sounds desperate, dare i saw close to breakdown (slightly out of breath, because he interrupts her, trying to get a word in, my first interpretation was that he was worried and tired, and gave in to her demands, scared to refuse her)
and then theres a breaths pause
You do? (she sounds so HOPEFUL, like she ACTUALLY would believe him if he said it, and i think in this moment Odysseus too realizes that just saying him him, would make it worse, so he sort of back paddles a bit?)
But not in the way that you want me to (because i see not a single clue in the rest of the music that would indicate that he as any positive emotions for her, and i rly just cant imagine him feeling any positive emotions for her even if she did NOTHING else than keeping him on the island, (which is VERY unlikely imo), but its also interesting because thats pretty much as well as vague as the odyssey leaves it, so its kindaaa more accurate again? except that we do not get any cue about ody’s view on the whole situation, we see him sitting at the beach, yes, but we dont get a single “as she wished but he did not” moment…so, thats up to the animators or maybe, maybe, one day jorge confirming or denying anything….but yeah, whatever Calypso feels, Odysseus does reciprocate the sentiment, I like thinking that she did try to guilt-trip into staying and that he ACTUALLY feels guilty for leaving her……….the rest of the saga has elements where I will read A LOT more into the scenes than is written out, so i might be over-analysing them at some point and projecting what I want it to mean into it…but alas)
I hate that I fell in love with you (yeah understandable)
Why did I fall in love with you? (because you were lonely girlie)
What do I do with this love for you? (process it and move on eventually, you got eternity to get over it)
How am I supposed to get over you? (therapy)
Why in the world won′t you love me too? (because HE HAS A WIFE WHO HAS BEEN LOING FOR FOR 20 YEARS )
The ending music is beautiful, but aT LAST he is sailing off
#epic the musical#epic the vengeance saga#vengeance saga#not sorry for loving you#leyanswers#i need a better tag for this#epic RnA#im excited to write chapter two of solace or sorrow#to make it as gut wrecking as i can#>:)
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ik im late but im playing through kaveh's hangout event and. the haikaveh brainrot is real
since these losers can't do it themselves i am here to offer my translation services ‼️
al haitham you liar. we are in a library using our indoor voices you did NOT hear us.
and even if you did mr. "i hate small talk" why'd u walk over hmm?? hmm??
"dont mind if i ignore you, i've got my earphones in" <- applies to everyone except kaveh
"okay now that i've gotten him distracted tell me what's wrong so i can discreetly fix it"
mans literally sent kaveh away to boost his confidence a bit + find out if he was okay.
"you annoted those books with such long and beautiful notes that eveyone hated lolol anyways check out those shelfs where there's a book with someone appreciating ur notes"
i can't get over how many exceptions al haitham makes for kaveh. he's not heartless and cruel in the way i often see him portrayed... but at the same time his entire demeanor is "i respect you as a person but won't go out of my way to do things for you unless it benefits me"
like he's one of the only characters who isn't super super close with the traveler, at least that's how i see it in the voicelines! he respects them as a friend, would consider doing things for them if they asked, but that's about it really!
but KAVEH. for someone who enjoys a peaceful life and has such a rational and efficient way of working it theoretically makes no sense for him to do all the things he does for kaveh.
like sure "maybe the cheering up kaveh is just to avoid having to deal with him drunk later", but that's too roundabout of a demeanor to be al haitham's style. plus, if he really didn't want to deal with a drunk kaveh, he could just kick him out.
but he doesn't because he cares, and kaveh does not understand that because he has created a vision of what he thinks al haitham is in his head, and in that vision he, kaveh, has no value so why would haitham have him around?? clearly he's got ulterior motives.
and they won't move further until kaveh lets go of that vision, and he can only do that if he truly realises his own worth, and until then haitham's gonna have to keep pushing him towards that from the shadows.
"he overworks himself, it's not healthy. he forgets the practicality of his ideals when he starts something, thinking he can pull through it, but reality hits him halfway. he can keep his ideals, that's fine, but i wish he was a bit more realistic about them."
"and despite all of the above, despite wanting to uphold his artistic integrity, he still puts everyone's needs before his own."
"his approach is too contradictory, and hence people don't see his talent. there are those who's resolve is so brash they are seen as confident and unshakable; and yet he who is more talented than them all falls behind because he's so easy to take advantage of."
al haitham taught me two new words today lol
irascible - someone with a quick temper
paragon - something viewed as a standard
"if he wants things to change he needs to find a balance between compromise and resolve. there is no way to please everyone, but instead of accepting this, he thinks he can nullify it if he takes all the burden instead."
kaveh's altruism stems from his own self-hatred, moreso than his desire to help others. and while doing a good deed puts a smile on his face, the melancholy guilt that trips him when he doesn't is far greater.
"if they are his ideals then i have no right to say anything about them. but he hurts himself so much as a result of that and i wish he would love himself a bit more."
al haitham has a great deal of respect for kaveh, not just as a scholar but as a person. and it's hard watching someone like that dig their own grave, and there's nothing you can do but wait in the sidelines, because they won't believe anything you say.
al haitham is constantly bickering with kaveh to get him to feel a little, challenge his ideals, find a way to make them work without sacrificing himself in return.
"at this poing talking to him is no use, he's convinced himself that his life only has purpose if it's in the hands of others. all people face hardships in life, but he seems to believe he deserves all he gets and more"
and then after kaveh is back he gives him space to talk about things that make him happy, and more importantly, appreciate himself.
how to tell kaveh i want to listen to his silly lil rants without sounding like a sap - al haitham's brain, probably
al haitham knowing all of kaveh's little buttons, and pressing the right ones after determining his mood, so he can show kaveh he loves him but still sound like a bitch.
"you did so well. i am so proud, and i hope you are proud of yourself too."
and sometimes he does click the wrong one, but then immediately goes back on it, becomes soft(er than usual), offers reassurance, changes the topic, and so on
we saw this in the parade of providence event, when kaveh got legitimately upset at one of haitham's remarks and he immediately went into I HAVE UPSET MY BF recovery mode.
and what i love the most in all this is KAVEH'S DUMBASS IS SO OBLIVIOUS TO THIS LMAOOO
but also it's sad because the reason he's oblivious is because he doesn't think he's worth being cared for like that.
haikaveh's whole vibe is "i love you, but i'd much rather you love yourself first" and "i'm your one and only, your only exception, the one you'd break all your rules for" and i love it.
#haikaveh#al haitham#kaveh#kavetham#genshin impact#alhaitham x kaveh#⥽ • chaos and chasms#try denying the allegations now bitches (affectionate)#i shld be al haithams translator fr
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is it okay if u do a Tom x reader with an Ed (so sorry if you are uncomfy with this ❕️❕️🤍🤍🤍)
Tom Kaulitz 🎸
Ofcc i hope you enjoy 🫶🏼 i dont know much about ed’s but im going to try my best 💗 if this triggers you in any type of way please contact me! Or if i did anything wrong, I absolutely mean no harm and i will fix my mistakes.
TW! ⚠️
Contains ED! And other possible sensitive topics!! Angst! I honestly dont know if i wrote about an ED cause im not very educated on it so im sorry if its not correct!
You woke up rubbing your eyes, seeing yourself in the mirror that stood infront of you. You stood up from your bed and walked infront of the mirror frowning as you pointed out all of your insecurities and picking at them.
You bit your lip as tears formed in your eyes, “Why me?” You thought, a knock on the door interrupting your thoughts.
“Y/n! You awake?” You heard, it was tom. Your best friend, he usually checked up on you to see if you were awake, since most days youd sleep almost all day.
“Yeah!” You replied, looking away from the mirror and getting dressed. You were going to go with the band someplace, it was probably an interview or something like that.
You werent apart of the band but youd usually tag along with them since you were one of their closest friends.
You picked out some baggy clothes that hid some of your insecurities perfectly. Once you finished you walked out of your room as your eyes met with toms.
“Tryna copy my style today?” He said, in a joking way. “You stole this outfit idea from me!” You said rolling your eyes playfully.
“Sureee.” He said as you both laughed and you made your way downstairs to the kitchen.
“Good Morning!” You heard bill say, “Morning!” You said with a smile on your face, you didnt want to bring the others moods down just because you werent feeling the best, so you tried to put on a big smile and pretended to look as happy as possible.
“You coming with us again today?” Bill said, munching on something he probably found in the pantry.
“You know it, gotta support my favorite boys!” You said giving him a small wink. He laughed and nodded.
You made your way to the living room as you saw gustav and georg searching for something, “Morningg, you guys need help with anything?” You said raising your eyebrow.
They looked at you and smiled, “no thanks, we got it!” you nodded and walked over to the couch, sitting down.
If you were being honest, you were so tired, and hungry. But no matter how hard you tried you just couldnt eat food without throwing it right back up.
This habit of not eating started a while ago but you were too afraid to open up to anyone and talk about it, assuming your friends would judge you because the real reason of why was because you had a crush on tom, but you knew he only saw you in a friendly way. And his type was beautiful gorgeous girls with the perfect bodys. Something you couldnt relate to. So you kept it a secret, but it would hurt you every time you saw tom with one of his girlfriends or heard them at night.
It took a big toll on your mental health and sleep, most days you felt like a zombie, not being able to sleep and just wanting to be away from everyone, but you tried to be positive in front of your friends so you wouldn’t worry them.
___
Time Skip
___
You waited for the band in the back as they were doing a small interview, once it was over with you could hear the screams of the fans and them yelling all sorts of things.
Of course some were about tom, you then saw as they stood up to greet some of the fans and saw him talking to some girl, you knew you shouldnt have gotten jealous but you could help it.
She was perfect, and tom had looked like he just fell inlove, of course you knew he just wanted her for one night but it still hurt to see him being all flirty with her. You didnt know why but seeing him with her bothered you so much and you just couldnt figure out why, she sure was beautiful but hes been with alot of girls and none of them bothered you as much.
You sighed and looked at yourself, comparing yourself to her and immediately feeling sick. Oh how you wished you looked like her.
You waited for a bit until everyone got back, so you just decided to stay quiet and keep on going with your day.
Once you got home you locked yourself in your room, immediately plopping yourself into your bed, sighing and closing your eyes.
You eventually fell asleep but would wake up throughout the night hearing the one thing you didnt want to hear, a girl in your best friends room. Basically screaming her lungs out.
You decided to sleep in, not wanting to do anything as your energy just kept getting lower and lower by the days.
Ag some point throughout the day you heard knocks on the door asking if you were alright or going with them some place and you just tried to ignore them but gave them short replies not really wanting to talk.
A few days of you being like this everyone decided to talk to you, it wasnt normal for you to be acting like this. Tom was the first one that knocked ti check in with you as always but you just groaned and complained that you were just tired.
He decided to leave you alone amd when you heard another knock it was gustav this time.
“Hey ___, you okay?” he said in a soft voice, “yes gus, im okay! Just tired.” You said yelling and laying your head down on your pillow.
“You havent came out at all, can i come in? Please?” He said, his voice sounding sad.
You sighed and bit your lip, “going..” you said and walked up to your door, unlocking it and letting him in.
You closed it quickly as you didnt want anyone else to come in.
You turned around and faced him, “What gus?” you said, “I jus- Oh my god, are you okay?!” He said as he fully saw your face, the dark circles under you eyes fully taking over your face and you skin looker paler than ever.
He had a worried look on his face as he looked at you, analyzing your whole face. “Im fine! Im just extremely tired gus.” You said sighing.
“No! You’re not okay, you look skinnier and more tired, like a literal zombie ___! Whats going on?” He said, as he got even more worried.
Your eyes started tearing up and before you knew it you started bawling your eyes out like a baby.
“I just cant do it anymore gus, im in love with tom! you know how much it hurts to hear him flirt and see all those girls with him? It hurts so fucking much gustav.” You said, as he wrapped his arms around you.
“Oh god, im sorry ___, But maybe he loves you too! I mean have you seen the way he looks at you?” he said trying to calm you down a bit.
“No gus, he likes those other gorgeous skinny perfect girls, i cant compare to that. He only sees me as a friend.” You said, sobbing.
“Thats not true ___! Youre so Beautiful and perfect to all of us! Please dont be starving youself and making changes to yourself just cause you think you arent pretty cause you are ___!! Probably one of the prettiest girls i have ever seen in my entire life!” He said hugging you even tighter as you just cried onto his shoulder.
You lift you head off his shoulder, looking into his eyes as you sniffled, “ you really mean that?” You said biting your lip so the tears would stop flowing out.
“Yes! Ask anyone! And its not just because we are your friends! Its true ___, i dont know how you dont see it.” He said with a frown on his face.
“Then why not me?” You said, your lip quivering. “Im sorry ___, hes just not looking in the right places, cause he has an amazing girl right infront of him.” He said pulling you into a deeper hug.
After that day youd only really talk to gustav, letting him in your room and talking with him, but one day he left and you heard a knock which you assumed was just him coming back fr something he mustve forgotten, but you were wrong.
“oh my god.. ___..” Tom said staring at you in disbelief as you had the door wide open. “Tom?..” you said quietly, “are you okay? Ive been so worried, oh gosh, you look so..” he said as he stood closer placing his hands on your cheeks, analyzing your face even more.
You know you looked more tired than usual but you were just drained from all the nights of you crying, and well you havent ate something in quite a while either.
As much as gustav would try to get you to eat you refused, but would lie to him saying you ate so he wouldnt worry too much.
“Whats going on ___?” He said biting his lip, “nothing tom. Now i want to be alone can you please go?” You said looking away from him as the eye contact was starting to get unbearable.
“Not until you tell me whats going on.” He said firmly, you started getting angry and pushed him out. “ i dont want to talk right now!” You said slamming the door shut and locking it.
You felt bad but why couldnt he just leave you alone, you wanted to get rid of your crush on him so things could go back to normal but it was so hard.
You sighed and opened the door seeing him looking down, “im sorry..” you said your head hanging low as you started to feel guilty for the way you were acting towards him.
“___ you’re my best friend, im worried about you.. can we please just hang out together or something? I miss you.” He said staring at you.
You could feel the way his eyes looked at you causing you ti loft your head up and you nodded as you met his eyes.
“Yeah, i guess..” you said putting your hand on your shoulder, not knowing what to do.
“Lets get snacks and watch our favorite movie no? Maybe that can help you feel a bit better..” he said, giving you a small smile.
“I- i guess..” you said, and walked over with him. Once you retrieved the snacks you went over to the living room and sat down as he put on your guys favorite movie.
“Alright, lets eat!” He said, “im actually not hungry right now, maybe a little later.” You said, pushing the snacks away from you.
“… if you say so.” He said slightly frowning and playing the movie.
You eventually drifted off to sleep in his shoulder and once you woke up you saw him already staring at you.
“Rise and shine princess.” He said, chuckling. God, why did he have to make this worse for you..
“Sorry, i didnt mean to fall asleep, i guess i was just tired.” You said, yawning.
“Its alright, im just glad you’re here with me.” He said smiling at you.
You bit your lip, “i should go to bed now.. Ill see you tomorrow yeah?” You said getting up from the couch.
“Oh.. yeah okay, ill see you tomorrow then?” He said looking at you with pleading eyes, hoping youd say yes.
“Yeah.. maybe, goodnight tom.” You said, “goodnight ___, love you.” He said and you just gave him a small smile and walked back upstairs to your room. You laid down in bed and sighed, shutting your eyes to drift off to sleep.
After a couple of weeks youd start hanging out more with the band again and mostly tom but as you sat down in the kitchen stool you felt someone come behind you.
“I brought you something to eat.” He said, placing a takeout box in front of you.
“Im not hungry right now, but thanks tom.” You said pushing it away, and giving him a small smile.
He sat next to you and sighed, “___, you’re never hungry.” He said, “im just not tom, i already ate.” You said wanting to stop talking.
“You dont have to lie to me! Im your best friend, plus youve been in your room like alllllll day. I havent seen you come down or anything to eat ___. So please eat.” He said pushing the food closer to you.
“Tom i said im not hungry!” You said, frustrated.
“___, whats going on. I know you havent been eating, i can tell! and when you do you take the smallest bites ever! and never finish it and say youre full. Why are you doing this to yourself ___?!” He said standing up now.
Your eyes got teary, “because im not skinny or pretty or … anything tom!” You said starting to break down into tears.
He looked at you shocked, “___… why do you say that? You are pretty! im looking at you and you are of the most perfect girls ive ever seen.” He said as his eyes started to get soft and teary.
“Then why dont you like me? If im so perfect why dont you like me tom?” You said full on bawling.
“W-What?” He said, shocked and confused.
“I love you tom. I like you.. but ive never been perfect like those other girls that you are always with, i cant compare to them. They have model bodies and beautiful faces, and i dont. I thought maybe if i stopped eating it would just fix all of my problems, but it only made them worse.” You said, in between sobs.
He immediately wrapped his arms around you, “y/n, i do love you. Ive always have. I thought you didnt like me so i distracted myself with other girls to get over my feelings for you, i didnt wanna ruin the friendship that we had. I thought you hated me.. when you started ignoring me ___..” he said, starting to cry.
You stopped crying as you were in shock, not expecting him to say those things. “Tom.. i could never hate you, i just wanted to distance myself so i could get over you, it hurt seeing you with other girls, i also didnt know you liked me..” you said staring at him, “please dont cry..” you said, placing your hands on his cheeks.
“___ please promise me you wont do this again, please try to eat, i know itll take some time but please ___.” He said, looking into your eyes.
You nodded, “ill try tom, i really will.. im sorry.” You said, “no i am, i really do love you ___.” He said as he started leaning in closer to you, “i do too tom..” you said, your faces inches apart.
He finally closed the gap between you two, softly placing a gentle kiss on your lips. He moved his hands on your waist, pulling you closer to him.
Once you departed he gave you a small kiss on your nose and smiled at you, you smiled back at him and blushed.
“Now lets get you something to eat, yeah? Then we can focus on everything else after meine liebe.” he said, placing another small kiss on your lips then grabbing the food as he helped you eat, even if they were small bites he still helped by giving you small praises.
And this was why you fell in love with him..
#tokio hotel#tom kaulitz#tokio hotel x reader#tom kaulitz x reader#tom kaulitz x you#tom kaulitz angst#tom kaulitz x y/n#tom kaulitz fluff
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