#well. nothing. nobody talks to me and only like 5 people actively keep up with me
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the most dangerous part of having a pet au that u never seriously work on except think abt it to ur writing playlist as u drive is that. you develop it. and it gets better. and then you really really want to write it. and you're in danger
#laughs in 5 ongoing fics#to be fair. i started them in 2019 and have updated them only like twice#so my readers know i am very slow#however thats why i can only talk abt this on this blog. bc if those guys find out im indulging other ideas i will get#well. nothing. nobody talks to me and only like 5 people actively keep up with me#but i will disappoint those mutuals and have to commit seppuku#anyway its precisely bc the bnha ending was so milquetoast that i have evolved this stupid fic#ah yes the story abt the children suffering due to the wrongs of the adults and trying to fix or burn the world and dying for their parents#ends with... nothing changing#and in fact. the parents get redeemed where the children must die#however. a story where that happens AGain however the main weapon of the children against the system is the reanimated no1 hero?#yeah.......#children who are hurt and angry and have the power to do something serious about it is my fav shit. sorry#and u know who has to fix it all and burn it all down properly this time? the guy with severe issues.#fellas is it gay to fall in love with your best friend and rivals reanimated corpse who came back wrong#however its still the closest you'll ever get to having him back#but you cant tell him you love him bc he;s not the same. he's not the one you've always loved#and then loving him as the monster they turned him into feels wrong but you do it anyway#he died for the system you're upholding even if its wrong. what are you supposed to do#now he is literally destroying that same system. do you choose your boss or do you choose the guy that used to know u the best in the world#i havent decided yet. i got distracted by the tragedy#anyway th story is that our protagonist ends up in possession of the reanimated hero bc of a quirk mishap kind of#and to curb his aggression to anyone that isnt the protagonist . they get him to play league of legends#bc he can vent his violent tendencies without anyone actually getting harmed. and accidentally becomes a ranked player#he doesnt eat or sleep so all he does in the handful of hours the protagonist has to crash is absolutely wreck shit online#“hey can i come over and see our friend who came back wrong?” “no the sight of a human will send him into a kill spiral.#however you can play video games with him as long as u dont mind getting killed a million times."
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no you know what I'm going to scream about the stuff I talked about in the tags of this post publicly
I'm tired of the well-meaning "don't feel bad if your work only gets 20 notes your genius is what counts and do it for you!" bullshit. I've had a good handful of friends who have straight up DEACTIVATED in recent months because their work was not getting reblogged AT ALL. No, it wasn't from lack of not being well-liked, no it wasn't from lack of trying to make sure it was getting out there to the people they knew would engage with it. It was because no matter how much they were praised privately for their work, when push came to shove, absolutely NOBODY reblogged it and gave it the audience that it was due, and I'm tired of people shoving the "unsung genius" narrative as an excuse for it. Nothing excuses that. And the boop event really proved that.
because I know given the opportunity, indiscriminately pressing a button (sometimes 10 thousand times, as I did) is not beyond this website's capability. y'all loved doing that. and look at what it wrought. nothing but love and affection and happiness. just from a couple of quick clicks of a little paw button. sure. nobody knew who you booped but the other person (which is how likes used to work on this website, btw). there was an element of anonymity to it. but that is kind of the core of this website that no other social media platform still has: the ability to be anonymous. and hyper-curating a blog on here like you might on twitter or instagram to project an image is simply not viable. and hey. you wanna know a secret: literally nobody cares what you post or whether it goes with the "theme" of your blog or not. yeah. I know. CRAZY concept in this day and age. but literally. I myself have reblogged things that have had nothing to do with whatever I am currently fixated by and you know what happened to my follower count? not a damn thing. in fact, I actively try to reblog things specifically BECAUSE it's my friends who made them (even though I'm not always good at KEEPING UP WITH HOW MUCH THEY POST @prismatica-the-strange will NEVER GO UNRECOGNIZED by me).
And you know what fucking sucks? I have to deal with this too. surprise right? you ever wonder why I reblog fics or art I post like 20 times the day that I post them? do you ever wonder why I ask about tag lists and beg for asks all the time? IT'S BECAUSE EVEN I GET LIKE. 5 LIKES ON THE THINGS I POST. AND THE REST OF THE REBLOGS ARE MINE SO I CAN MAKE SURE THAT PEOPLE WHO WANT TO SEE WHAT I MAKE GET TO SEE IT. and I say that knowing that I'm certainly not an unpopular blog, or an unpopular writer. I know that people love the stories that I create. Hell, half of the people that I've talked to about lady terror have told me that they consider her to be canon (AND EVEN SOME!! THOUGHT SHE WAS!!! WITHOUT EVEN HAVING WATCHED THE SHOW! WHICH IS STILL SO SO WILD TO ME!!!) But especially in the last 4 years (which really dates this phenomenon), my posts, no matter how well received they've been amongst people I've talked to about them directly, I still go into the notes and at least half (often more than half) are MY reblogs to make sure people saw what I posted. and it happens every single time, and I can't tell you how much it crushes me considering that it used to be that I would be able to post it only once, and people would reblog it sometimes even HUNDREDS of times.
It's not about popularity. it never has been. it's not about anxiety. or shifting website cultures. even if you lurk, the simple fact is, that if you want people to keep making what you love. you have to reblog. your theme won't suffer because you reblogged a fanfiction that you really admire. your posting won't be ruined because you reblogged some fanart from someone in a different fandom. really. I promise. and if people do unfollow you for that? who needs em. followers come and go but you should NEVER have to cater to them. on this website it has ALWAYS been the other way around. lean into it. make it yours. put stuff you ACTUALLY WANT to be seen and that you love and appreciate on your blog. no matter how old it is, how new it is, no matter how niche or off-theme it is.
so please. if you really want to show your appreciation for someone's work? you reblog. it's really as easy as that. check the tags. add some when you reblog if you like. but please for the love of god reblog. it's as easy as booping and even more rewarding for the people who you reblog from. if you want to let someone know that their work is genius and appreciate it? show it. reblog. then DM them if you're too nervous to say what you want to say but not in a public forum. but for christ's sake. REBLOG.
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Ok, maybe a hot take or not, but I have been thinking as they're two of my Naruto favs and my favorite father-son duo and father's day is next weekend here, but nobody ever talks about how Sakumo messed up Kakashi's life. Okay, before you get on me, yes, people do talk about him un-aliving himself and the impact that had all the time, yes, I get that. BUT, nobody ever talks about how he put Kakashi into the ninja academy at 4 (!) and essentially robbed him of the possibility of EVER having a normal childhood and as a result, a normal life. I get it, I mean your child is this exceptional prodigy who's not "normal" - probably was talking at 3 months, walking at 6 months, reading at 18 months and maybe had 2 chakra natures by the time he was 3 🤷🏾♀️. *headcanon alert* Single-parent Dad had to work all the time as a legendary shinobi in a world at war and probably had NO idea what to do with this child with that kind of intellect and talent and would see it as a waste to keep him home (daycare/sitter/where all the other babies go who have active shinobi parents??). So he wanted to nurture those talents - to him it made sense, and in a lot of ways it does, but still...the shinobi world was messed up. 4 year olds should be learning their ABCs - yeah yeah yeah, he already knew his - or playing in the sandbox - okay, so he didn't play well with others, but still, just sayin'...
Then we get to Hiruzen. Sakumo in all likelihood had to ask permission from Hiruzen to enroll his child, who was only born 4 years prior, in the academy. But Hiruzen only saw this child as another tool. Even in the (filler) anime, Hiruzen was all hyped about watching that little 6-year-old in the chunin exams and the Forest of Death. Then, apparently, saw nothing wrong with putting that baby boy on multiple squads with teenagers and adults(!) who kept kicking him off because they refused to take orders from a baby with an attitude problem and then was also sending him on missions during a war (ngl, he'd make a good decoy and would be good at hiding and espionage bc they'd think he's just a cute little kid - Hiruzen, my man, I get it - a six year old is like 3 1/2 feet tall and weighs like 40 pounds on a good day).
Going to give gramps some benefit of the doubt. In looking at mission stats, Kakashi did a heck of a lot D-ranked missions - after Iruka, Kakashi has more D-rank missions than any other shinobi, so thinking Hiruzen possibly felt some guilt and did keep him in the village for some time because of his age (hopefully?? like "here's a mission, go pet some lonely puppies at the animal shelter and spend the day with them to build social skills."). But still...make it make sense. Everybody gets on Hiruzen because of how he treats Naruto, but old man's been treating kids that way long before Naruto was born. And don't give me that, "well, Kakashi was a genin at 5, chunin at 6, so he was technically grown" bs...because then I will say go see the first paragraph about his daddy unintentionally setting him up from the start. Everybody was trying their best, I guess...
Okay, now getting off my high horse and going to bed 😊...
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Elaborates
(@co1n-operated @t4tdanvis @mortalcomplaints I hope you're happy (t4tdanvis especially will be because I accidentally added Dante to the polycule whoops)
Yeah so I decided to start shipping what has quickly become my favorite My Street polycule of a bunch of dumb werewolves and also Laurance and Travis. Let's break it down one member at a time.
It all starts with Blaze, as the best things do. His two primary romantic attachments are Garroth (obviously), and Aaron (I feel like this is also obvious). Now his attraction to Aaron only started when they were in college, where they reconnected after Aaron decided to start actively rebelling against his parents because they suck and barely raised him. Something tells me his parents wouldn't have approved of Blaze as a friend because of... [gestures to Blaze] all of that.
This is also true for Garroth, but Garroth and Blaze only got together in my mind at Starlight, which means this series sort of follows the plot of MyStreet, but stops at Season 5 and doesn't have any of the angst or whatever season 6 was on about. Starlight is still Aaron's big emotional recovery summer vacation with all of his friends, and Garroth and Blaze totally hook up because Laurance decided to stay home to look after everyone's houses (mostly because he's making absolute bank house sitting to. Seriously, like two months of summer that he gets to spend doing basic maintenance across like... at least 4 houses on Lover's Lane. He's thriving).
But Garroth misses his boyfriend, and he and Laurance agreed before this vacation even started that Garroth was free to go out and meet some cute guy and have a fun summer fling with him. Literally nobody anticipated that person being Blaze, but here we are. And this trip originally came after Blaze had spent a full year helping Aaron with his recovery process, and Blaze's main reason for being here was to ensure Aaron was getting better. And Blaze has chronic falls in love with his friends disease.
Aaron doesn't but it happens anyways and he has no idea what to do about it. Especially when he finds out Blaze and Garroth are a thing kind of. He tries to keep this in, try to make it seem like nothing is bothering him, but Blaze can read Aaron so easily it's not even funny. He's probably dyslexic and he can still read Aaron like an open book. He very easily manages to coax the truth out of Aaron, but Blaze is really blunt (haha get it) and just front and center tells Aaron "This doesn't have to be anything, but also I'm in love with you and thought you would have realized from being friends with me for nearly a dacade that you can date multiple people."
Aaron's honest reaction
But when Blaze starts going on about Garroth one day, Aaron realizes that he kind of agrees with Blaze about a lot of things relating to Garroth that he maybe wouldn't normally agree with. Like how uplifting his smile is, or how cute he looks when he gets excited, or how much fun it is to rile him up and make him mad because he always gets really silly, that sort of thing. And uhh, yeah needless to say Aaron doesn't often fall in love, but when he does it is hard and it is fast.
And then they go back home and Garroth kinda sits Laurance down and is like "So... I kind of fell in love with Blaze. And Aaron." And Laurance just goes "Yeah I know, I was talking to Travis like the entire time you guys were there." I feel like Laurance and Travis are friends with benefits. And maybe something happened between Laurance and Dante when everyone was gone, but who knows? Maybe something more happened when Travis came back between all three of them too, but you didn't hear it from me.
So Laurance takes it well, yay! But uhhh... Now Aaron and Garroth realize that they either have to fess up to their parents about not only falling in love with each other, but also the stoner loser friend who their parents barely tolerate because he has actually been helping Aaron. As an anon scholar once said "The best ships are ones that would make Garte disappointed in Garroth." He was already displeased with Garroth for dating one boy he liked in high school, now he's dating three?! Finding out that he had a summer fling turned gay polyamorus romance would certainly cause... A reaction. AND it's with another wealthy businessman's son?
I feel like Derek would slowly start to come around, having more time to adjust to the fact that he can have gay children after Melissa re-introduced him to Lucinda as her girlfriend like a week into their stay at Starlight, and he just learned to accept that his children are both probably gay in some way. He's still not the biggest fan of Blaze, but Garroth has a good head on his shoulders. Although he still doesn't entirely get how this works in tandem with Aaron having a relationship with Aph, but he'll get there eventually.
And let's be clear, while this whole thing starts as like two separate romances with a common link between them because of Garroth and Laurance being together, it does become a proper polycule very easily. Laurance and Blaze would adore each other, and they would love to shower Garroth in attention together, they'd hang out and play video games together, they'd do each others make-up badly while listening to white girl pop and oh hey Dante when did you get here?
Blaze may not get along the best with Garroth and Aaron's parents, but he's besties with literally everyone's siblings. Melissa is his wing man and vise versa, he's literally Vylad's dealer, and Zane tolerates him. And when he meets Cadenza they would instantly hit it off, are you kidding me? Blaze doesn't know a thing about fashion or color theory because he's literally colorblind, but Cadenza seems to be excited when he lets her take him shopping for outfits. And he knew Gene before he even knew Dante, they literally sold each other drugs under the bleachers at Phoenix Drop high before Dante was even there.
And we take all of this in tandem with my stoner headcanons? With Blaze already being friends with/knowing deep secrets about almost everyone involved, and they're all just kinda naturally chill around him because of that. Blaze goes over to Travis and Dante's house before any of this even happens to help them hotbox it with whatever wack ass set up he decides to bring. Who's to say something more never happened between them? I'm just saying, in my experience, weed makes people more of homosexuals than they already are.
No matter how you pair it up this just works. When I say this ship is everything to me, I mean it is everything to me.
#mystreet#mystreet blaze#mystreet aaron#aaron lycan#mystreet laurance#mystreet garroth#mystreet travis#mystreet dante#garrance#danvis#i cant#think of any other ship names#i dont even want to try and combine their names#aphblr#aphverse#mystreet headcanons#mystreet starlight#stoner headcanons#every Blaze post needs to be tagged like that#its just what he does#he makes people gay#and smoke weed#i love him
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Welcome to Kalen Tries a Life Hack/Brain Hack, brought to you by....well, me.
So certain obvious things are obvious: I’ve been struggling for awhile, the whole being off my meds thing for months cuz of the Adderall shortage hit me HARD, and the number one thing I need to actually build and move forward and get out of eternal debt and accomplishing actual goals is a degree of stability.
I’m eternally grateful for every donation people have given me over the years and its literally kept me alive and off the streets at times. But ebegging sucks, nobody likes doing it, and its not sustainable.
Thing is, I’ve been talking about getting a steady patreon up and running forever but like, there’s always a reason why it doesn’t happen. Part of that is because of the basic nature of how things compound when you lack resources and have issues to address on multiple fronts. New problems demanding my time and attention constantly pop up while adding to stress and affecting my overall mental state and productivity. Part of that is the fact that I am my own worst enemy when in states of high stress, low meds, and minimal resources.
I get caught in loops where I convince myself that the only way forward or to validate the help I’ve been given or asked is via some big grand production that of course never materializes because haha if I were in a state where I could reliably create the product I want on the timetable I need, most of my problems would take care of themselves. But also I have a tendency to try and pull a former life hack I used to rely on, the whole ‘when my executive dysfunction is particularly bad, use pressure and deadlines to try and force myself to produce’ which y’know....may have worked at previous points in my life but I was in very different places then and bottom line, it just flat out doesn’t work for me now, so it just ends up as overpromising and flaking out with no actual gains to show for it.
So I’m trying a different approach. I’m just putting it out there, this is what it is, and I’m starting small in complete opposition to my usual (and not working) attempts. I’ve opened up a discord for my fics and original projects and am listing the tiers of my patreon below. I’m following this up with complete rundowns of everything I have SOMETHING for, to some degree or another:
1) Teen Wolf fanfics
2) Original fantasy works
3) Dick Grayson fanfics
4) Original sci-fi works
5) X-Men fanfics
6) Original superhero works (my original superhero universe, the Ellis Eighteen ‘verse)
I’ll tackle the Teen Wolf stuff following this post, and then try and do the rest one day at a time. That’s the gist of the life hack: just going with the philosophy something is better than nothing. None of these do me any good just sitting on my computer and I’m flat out, literally just never going to reach a stable enough place where I AM just able to complete and release any of them in their complete form, the way I’d like, if I keep overshooting without ending any further along.
So I’m just gonna try building it one day at a time, growing it with the support of people who are interested enough in what there is now to want to see more and help me get more out there, until bit by bit I eventually reach actual completion on some of them.
Any and all of these can be followed up on in my discord server should any catch your eye enough to want to try just a trial’s month - with this next month being much the same for me, as I see how viable this is and how well I’m sticking to it, versus what changes I can make to make it more effective.
My blog isn’t going anywhere, the server is just entirely for fic and original projects and all things related to them, but my usual inanity will persist, I do want to try to get back to writing meta and stuff and being more active in my fandoms, hopefully once I get back on my meds and get a little more grounded.
My existing patterns of posting and interaction aren’t contingent on people donating or joining my discord - I don’t intend for much to change here. And I’m not saying like ‘from now on I’m only posting my writing to my discord’ or anything like that. Its literally just for people who want to help support me while I add to my existing content, are fine with or interested in more of my content even in incomplete stages, are interested in commissioning ‘writing time’ on specific projects of their choice while I do my writing directly in the server....and once I do have a new complete chapter of a fic or complete one-shot, etc....that’ll still get posted for anyone to read. Same as how I still intend to publish or self-publish original projects once they reach completion.
Its like I said: I just can’t deliver completion in a timely, reliable fashion the way I want, as is, and I can’t make guarantees on when complete projects will materialize without it just ending up more empty promises. THIS I at least can deliver on, and use it to build to something bigger and more complete. *Shrugs* I’d rather get something out there than just continually shifting goalposts about when something will be out here.
SO!
All that said, below are the tiers I’m going with. I literally don’t even have the patreon itself made yet because a) I’ve used ‘I still have to make that’ as an excuse not to do this too many times so I literally just said fuck it and opened up a new post and started typing this instead, lol and b) Patreon does only pay out monthly and not going to lie, could really use donations in the meanwhile as I’m trying to get a new prescription appointment ($180 now thanks to my psychiatrist raising their rates, yay) for different ADHD meds since Adderall still isn’t reliably in stock and they won’t switch my prescription over to something I haven’t tried out yet without a new appointment (and those meds will likely be in the $50-$90 range).
SO I literally am just posting this now, with my paypal and ko-fi links, but the discord itself is already up if anyone wants to just donate directly and ask for a direct discord link/invite and then I’ll add the link to the actual patreon as soon as its up, but also, if you go the donation route you can try this out and see if its worth it to you this month before actually signing up for the patreon or trying a different tier.
TIERS
1) $1 tier: No rewards offered, I've seen this done by other people who have regular platforms they create content on and don't charge anything so its like a completely opt-in "hey if you just like my blog and content in general, would like to see me be able to make a go of being a creator and support that in general because you think I come up with interesting stuff, this is super helpful and appreciated" thing. I know a lot of people don’t think $1 makes a difference, but literally just $1.39 buys a thing of pasta that can feed me for two days if need be, and a couple more bucks from someone else gets some sauce, lol. Trust me, if you’re ever like “I’d like to support him but only have an extra buck or two and don’t know if that would make a difference” - it does, and is still super appreciated!
2) $5 tier: As stated, I’ve set up a discord where anyone can start threads for literally any of my fanworks, Teen Wolf, Dick Grayson, and X-Men, and ask what I have available as is on that particular project, pick my brain about it, engage me on it in the hopes it leads to me dedicating my next writing session to it if I’m not already planning to write something else in specific, etc. This tier gives people access to it, so they can see the stuff I don't have published or released because its not finished yet, or I’ve written parts non-linearly, and there’s a specific scene they were hoping to see in the fic later on and wondered if that’s written yet, etc. Plus this is where I’ll do all my fanfic writing sessions when I am actively working on a new chapter or something, because I LIKE to write in real-time on things like discord (I used to write fic in a messenger app with Moukie. I didn’t even need them reading it or responding, just knowing someone was 'there' made it easier for me to write, just makes it easier to shut up and write or get the words to come).
So I figure might as well try and make it a two-fer: for five bucks people can get access to stuff that might not be finished yet (or even ever) but still could be interesting or enjoyable to them, but also can read along as I work on stuff that I'm actively trying to update, even if I still end up with more to go in that chapter or fic and thus its not ready to update yet by the end of a writing session
3) $10 tier: Exact same thing as the $5 tier, which is also included with this one, but this one also gives access to the separate forum I’ve opened up for my various original projects I'm working on or at least started/got a sizable dent into even if they ended up discarded (at least for now). Again, this one is primarily for people who want to support me in general, free up time from constantly stressing about being able to afford food and meds and wasting so much time looking for more freelance opportunities or work - which basically doubles the amount of time I spend ‘working’ every day without anything to show for most of it. This allows for more writing time in general, but at least comes with something to show for it, and like, I figure anyone who genuinely thinks 'hey I think this guy can write/would buy his book' could find something to interest them in here, especially since it also includes the same 'read-along' option for my literal WIPs when I’m doing a writing session on one of them.
4) $15 tier: Both previous tiers are included, but with this tier people also get the option of picking a story from any of the fandom or original projects I have up on my server, and making it the focus of one of my writing sessions that month. They can do it either as a prompt "hey would like if you dedicated one of your writing sessions to working on this particular project this month, whenever that happens to be" or if they want, they can try and coordinate a time for that writing session, as in I’d go "these are the hours I typically do my writing these days, pick when you'd like to see me work on this story," either cuz they'd like to read along, or its earlier in the month, or like, they have that day off and thus its a good day for re-reading that project or maybe getting an update on it, etc.
Typically, my writing sessions tend to be at least an hour, anywhere up to around six hours, so this tier guarantees that at least one hour of writing time that month would be focused on a particular project. But as much as I hop around between projects in general, I don't switch between projects in the same single writing session, so practically speaking, it would likely be more than just a single hour, and could even result in an entire chapter update on chaptered works. I just know I can guarantee the hour, whereas I can’t guarantee 'oh this will for sure be a five hour writing session' and thus I went somewhat higher than like, a wage for an hour's work, but not like, super high? As I figure its more likely to land somewhere in the middle, length of time-wise. But also, depending on how this actually goes this first month, I might end up adjusting my approach to this tier or the price level, etc.
5) $25 tier: This one includes all the same access and rewards provided by the lesser tiers as well, but with the additional reward that in addition to getting to set the agenda for one writing session that month, you get to also set that same project or a different one as a 'boosted priority' for the month. What this means is - in the interests of maximizing the gains of having people thwart my indecisiveness over what to work on, lol - whatever you pick here will go on a shortlist of projects that are my go-to's for the month, any time I have a writing session I don't already have a prompt for, or a personal desire to focus on a certain project.
Basically, its a way of creating my short list of 'To Turn To In Case of Indecisiveness' any time I am being stalled by indecisiveness, rather than other external issues, and any 'prompted' writing sessions are already scheduled or used up. So this one comes with caveats....I want to make it clear that 'how much' people get out of this one is NOT something i can guarantee, as it'll depend on how many writing sessions I can squeeze in that month overall, whether or not I have a particular project that's on the brain enough that I'm going to it regularly, just based on my own choice/momentum, stuff like that.
But the plus side of this one is if the $15 tier is of interest to people, and its worth it to get to be able to ask for several hours' worth of productivity/output on a particular story of mine.....this tier potentially replicates that same thing multiple times throughout a month and can lead to a lot of progress on a certain single story. So potentially, way more bang for your buck. It is more of a crapshoot, but worst case scenario, you're still likely to get at least two writing sessions geared towards a story you're interested in, for less than double the cost of your patronage of one writing session...but best case scenario, in a month where I don't have a ton of other pressing projects demanding my attention, this could keep me engaged with your project of choice regularly throughout the month, with the increased output to show for it.
Either way, people are still likely to end up with way more output of their choice/liking due to this than they ever would have if I were just sitting in front of my computer playing 'how much time can I waste doing nothing productive while claiming its just cuz I need to Make The Right Choice of what project to be productive on.'
All that said:
I'm focusing just on time rather than length/word count at the moment just because mentally its a lot easier/less stressful for me to think 'oh I know for sure I can make sure they receive the time I guaranteed I'd focus/devote to this in exchange for their patronage' because its a lot easier for me to just show up and start writing than it is for me to look at a set length of fic I need to complete within a certain timeframe - as the latter is a lot more likely to suck me into one of my weird spirals where completion becomes the enemy of productivity.
Anyway.
I think that’s everything, thank you as always for hearing me out and your consideration even if you don’t end up giving this a whirl. No expectations here, I have no idea how well or not it might work out, but its something new to try because previous approaches just aren’t working but I’m not throwing in the towel, just.....reconfiguring for a new run at achieving some long-term stability and productivity. This at least is a lot more geared towards navigating around my particular issues with my ADHD and executive dysfunction and finding a way to hack them even when I’m not on meds. So, let this experiment begin I guess? LOL. The end.
My links:
https://paypal.me/bigskydreaming?country.x=US&locale.x=en_US
https://ko-fi.com/kalenp
And again, if you want to go ahead and give one of these tiers a try via a donation, you can hit me up directly for a discord invite, or if you prefer more anonymity/distance, you can just wait for the patreon with a more automated/streamlined process. You can also upgrade to a different tier later of course, and let me know if you have specific questions.
Thank you again!
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i honeslty hate these new krpers. activity checks used to consist of posting once every four days. now it's once every TWO WEEKS.. and people are still complaining?! if you don't want to be active then please free up your muse so someone who actually wants to rp can take them, thank you! // the whole discourse on the posting thing and why that anon brought it up initially is that there are a lot of posts clogging up the feed. not that it's too much to do activity wise. 💀 even posting every four days or posting a week was a lot back then too. not activity wise but having to see handful of posts each day.
i'm not the original person who brought it up but for years i've always thought the downfall of larger roleplays is that there is SO MUCH going on feed wise to the point where people burn out and eventually dwindle down in PUBLIC activity. which ultimately leads to people leaving the roleplay in drones because people never fail to jump ship when they notice those things. (of course what admins provide for their members also has a lot to do with this as well)
there is a reason why when places initially open, have just under a hundred muses and have less posts being posted, have more comments (10+) than an older places with over a hundred muses, more posts and less comments and maybe 3 or 4 posts reach up to 12 comments. in a place that has over 150 muses... you would HOPE that posts reach past 6 or 8 comments. even then when those newer places gain more traction, you would think that the feed would only gain more interactions? wrong! it only meets the inevitable: too many posts/people to keep up with. too many posts to interact with. members are stretched thin and public engagement ends up looking like less.
honestly none of these posts are boring aside from the posts that consists of a random ass quote or two sentences talking about the weather. but those are the people who are fighting for an extra posts requirement/option. for what? so you can continue to give us nothing? let me see posts from people who WANT to post, from people who love to give effort in posts. i miss out on good posts because there are a lot to scroll through! it would take me up to an hour to scroll through, read, interact with the post and only for 5 new posts be published within that timeframe.
and that is just to catch up on 2 days worth of posts! 2 days!
the number one complaint made by people in LARGER roleplays is that posts don't get enough engagement. "is it me or is so-and-so dying?" no, it's not because nobody wants to scroll past more than 10 posts and out of those 10 posts they scrolled past? they decided to comment on 3. "so-and-so is a good place but posts hardly get comments." yes because oh my god there are TOO MANY POSTS.
i'm possibly part of the minority in this case but i would LOVE to see less posts in a large roleplay and see more unique engagement between muses. i've yet to ever see a 100+ member place reach consistency in post interactions. i would also love to have to spend less time on the public feed and be able to get through and interact with more posts without having to sacrifice the attention i give to dms and threads.
tldr; this is a hobby ... i don't want to spend as much time on a feed full of fictitious people as i do now but i also don't want to be the cause of less activity that leads to people wanting to leave. having less posts on the feed would mean i get to interact with more people who genuinely enjoy posting on what their muse has been up to. not just that but this helps out muses who hardly post on social media irl and don't have much going on. COUGH, MUSES IN MILITARY, COUGH.
・❥・
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13 Horrible First Date Ideas
I get it; we all make bad decisions when we're stressed, and there are few things more stressful than going on a date. You want this person to like you, as well as think you're unique, cute, and creative. Don't let your imagination run as far as these date suggestions! 1. Cemetery
13 Horrible First Date Ideas Sure, it'll be nice and quiet, and no one will bother you. If you want to have a quiet date, go to the park. There's no need to scare your potential partner with thoughts of their unavoidable death. 2. Massage You may believe that a nice neck rub will relieve tension and allow you to see your date in less clothing, but lying silently while strangers touch you is not a comfortable first-date activity. Save it for when you're married and stressed all the time. 3. McDonalds
13 Horrible First Date Ideas Nobody wants to feel as if they're on a low-cost date. Throwing money around isn't the key to a long-lasting relationship, but even a smidgeon of "classy" and "fancy" is required to make a good first impression. You can get fries later, but don't make them the main attraction. 4. Club First dates are for getting to know each other in a casual setting. Even if you are friends and have a good relationship, the club is not the place to have conversations and play footsie. Dancing is fun, but why not try a salsa or jazz club instead? 5. Literally Anything that Involves Messy Food For the fifth date, skip the BBQ, pizza, burgers, chicken wings, and pasta in favor of something that can be eaten with a fork and knife without making a mess. Not only will this help you avoid embarrassing yourself, but it will also make your partner feel more at ease. 6. Competitive Sport
13 Horrible First Date Ideas Make your date feel as if they must compete with you. Nothing good can come from this. Best case scenario: you discover they are a hater. Worst case scenario, the date will begin with sports and end in the emergency department of your local hospital. 7. Meeting the Parents First dates are stressful enough without having to meet the mother. Your date's mother may be the life of the party, so keep it cool, friendly, and reserved. And, like, if the first date goes well, you can begin opening up to your "new mom". 8. Double-Date It is difficult to devote your entire attention to one person. It's difficult to strike up a conversation with someone you don't know. Consider tripling the amount of stress by introducing two more people into the mix! Your friends may be fun, but your date is here to spend time with you and only you. 9. The Wild You may have noticed that the key to a first date appears to be an intimate setting that allows you to focus on your date, talk to them, and spend quality time with them. The true key, however, is comfort, and a camping trip in the woods does not qualify. You'd be surprised how many people think this is a good idea, but believe me when I say it isn't. 10. Destination Date The first rule of first dates is to not put your date in a situation from which they cannot escape. Even if you want to ensure that they have to spend time with you, taking them to a location where they can't immediately leave will make your date uncomfortable. Even if it's a romantic dinner in Paris, no destination date beats the security of knowing you can leave and never see your date again if you lie about your cat being sick. 11. Your Favorite Dive Bar Drinks serve as a social lubricant. They facilitate genuine connections between people by breaking down barriers of shyness and inhibition and allowing conversations to flow smoothly. There is, however, a distinction to be made between going to a nice bar and going to your local dive bar where the music is bad, the floor is sticky, and the lighting is poor. 12. A Boat Ride You might think that not giving your date the option of a sly escape will guarantee a successful first date, but trust me don’t make them feel stranded on a boat. No amount of beautiful city skylines or Titanic references will help them feel more comfortable in this situation. 13. The Opera You know what I mean? This has the potential to be a good idea. It's elegant, you'll look great in it, and it's extremely romantic. However, consider whether your date is comfortable dressing up, whether they will feel comfortable in this type of environment, and whether they enjoy high-pitched singing in the first place. Read the full article
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The devil's desire | Yoongi
Summary;
You fell in love with a man of many pasts, however he desired more than a relationship. He wanted your soul for eternity.
Words: 13k
Devil yoongi! Demon au! Human reader
Very Dark themes
Warnings: religious concepts, gore, porn without plot, death, big dick yoongi, clubbing, kidnapping, non-con touching, blood, cnc, prey ( y/n ), stalker yoongi, drugged, drugs, chains, cutting, rough sex,
"She's almost ready sir!" a winged creature announced. Nodding in his throne, he took the mirror and looked through it. There you were getting ready to meet a mysterious guy at a club or well hoping to once again. He smirked devilishly knowing you remembered to come back to this particular club.
He previously brought you to this nightclub in Korea, hidden through an alleyway in the darkest part of Busan. There was danger and a constant fear of being robbed, kidnapped. Even if Korea was a safe place, things like kidnapping and murder still happen and even more so at night.
He remembered that you kept a knife and a taser with you, he liked the vulnerability you had going to a place not meant for angels let alone humans at night. He found it charming how oblivious you are to your surroundings as well. He was a man of darkness and hell for sure, but one thing was for sure. He only craved humans who were pure and light energetically. 'Suppose you did know that the Club was own by the devil himself, would that really stop you' he thought.
He watched her put on clothes and noticed how delicate she was in his eyes. No, this wasn't the first time he'd watch her. Not the last either, it seemed like a generational curse in his eyes. He wasn't mad he placed it on the females to feel tempted by his actions, however, each one passed the test. you however failed it the first two times, making it the third time.
Sighing, he put the mirror down and stood up. Stretching, he allowed his black feather wings to elongate and move around before putting them away. Looking at his watch it was a quarter past 11 pm, he'd knew you want to be early and try and catch a good table. However the little worry of what if someone wanted to take you before him, hurt you before him. The thoughts riled him up, making him grab his keys and wait by the portal. Besides the gate doesn't open until 11:59, so his intrusiveness can calm for now.
While waiting, he took out the cute little human hand mirror you'd gifted him a while back. He looked at himself and the scar over his left eye, "maybe this is what attracts them" he chuckled softly.
As time fastened, he waited for the lock in the air to appear. He waited long and hard for that little red lock and once it appeared, he opened all the portals from his underworld to the human world and the other one which lead stright to his club.
Formally known as 666 plaza to hadians, the chosen humans only knew it as void 218. To you it was just another club on the holy day of Sunday. Although you were never brought up with Christianity, you had the basics that everyone knew, loved, and hated.
Waiting by the gates or humanly known as "doors" you pulled out your phone to realize there was no battery or charge. Confused as you could've sworn it was full when you left, you herd the doors open and the mini line began moving. Your eyes wandered the room to find the stairs that led to the upper level where you would meet and see Yoongi. You knew it was stupid to keep doing this, but with yours and his schedule it wasn't at all.
Passing by the few people, you found upstairs and walked up seeing there were already people inside which confused you, but you paid little attention to it. Waiting by the usual black velvet seats and area, you head a familiar voice.
"Is this your regular peach vodka with light ice?" yoongi asked loudly over the now loud music playing. Nodding, you sat up and greeted him before getting your drink. Little did u know about his plans with you or what tonight was gonna be.
Smiling softly, yoongi was gentle eyes admired your beauty as he get down with his own drink. He took a sip of his own drink that was laced with a sleeping drug, one that'd do nothing to him and more to you.
"So what are you doing here?" He asked knowingly.
"Well, it's a Sunday and I have nothing planned so I thought I come by" you lied, hoping the white lie would slip. Nodding, yoongi put his hand on your thighs and moved closer to talk to you about life and each other week. You mentioned something about the campus or school you were studying and he lied about his "forensics" job and how hard it was to see how people died. Continuing, he bought the two of you more drinks and when the timing was right offered one of his. Thanking him for the kind jester, you took a sip. He smiled and also took a sip after you, then placed it back down.
"Good isn't it?" he said, reaching over to his phone and at the time. Noticing he did so you hummed and snuck another sip. Then another. Whatever was in had you almost drinking his entire cup down.
"Omg what is this, what's making it so good. I can't put my finger on it" she said as her words slowed down and her eyes blinked slowly. He watched her body start to feel tired, then at the right moment whispered in her ear "apple, cherry, lime, it's a light alchcolic drink and right, drugs."
Soon as her eyes closed and body dropped, he mustered enough strength to pick her up and sling you over his shoulder. "Another one taken by the devils favorite drink, poison apple," he whispered knowing nobody cared to stop him not could. Well not if they wanted hells punishment if not worse death, even if they were immortal. Walking up the last set of stairs he opened the portal and handed the keys to his servant and told him to look after.
Noting the girl, the servant nodded and knew the king was gonna take his time and would be in a long "meeting." Taking charge of the place, yoongi walked up to his Castle surrounded by blue flames in the middle of nowhere and walked in. He demanded for total privacy, meaning nobody in or even near the castle or be banished for eternity and with that everyone wondered what that soul did to get his undivided attention. From there gossip spread about you from one to another creature and it traveled fast.
Meanwhile, he laid you on the bed and looked at his watch. The drug last about 30 minutes and about 20minuets have gone. From there he requested one trusted worker with a list. The list was :
The devils list
Body Chains and rope
Salt and a black cross
2 Robes
Wipes
Black paint
Sheep's blood
Lube any flavor
Nodding the worker flew off and yoongi allowed his wings to expand out his back and eyes to turn a dark blue color as his hair contained white strips. He watched your sleeping body, before checking the time and seeing he has 5 minutes left before you wake up. Taking that in he stretched his neck and before activating his speed and undressing you, cleaning the area around the bed, making sure the chain locks are stable and if not changing them, turning off lights and lighting candals all around the room and the whole castle and finally sitting down at the edge. Checking the time once again, he had 3 minutes left and so did the worker before he'd get pissed and with that thought the worker came to drop everything off before yoongi told him to get lost.
With the activation of speed he quickly undressed, sat the cup near the bed and filled it with sheeps blood, put salt near the edge without touching it as it stung him, put the cross around his neck and began drawing a ritual circle around the bed then finnaly the walls. To end everything he placed the chains on your hands and feet then connected to each end of the bed. The rest of the stuff he just put next to the bed and laid naked above you waiting for you to wake up.
He knew the drug was strong, but he didnt think it was that strong so he checked the time again and 10 minutes had passed by. Sighing, he began taking the knife and cut a slit on his wrist and placed the wound to your mouth. After a few blinks, you began to wake up and within a second you panked and a minute later realised you were chained.
Weak, scared, targeted, blood covered lips, chained and his favorite vulnerability he finally felt aroused at the sight. With lust in his eyes and an aura darker than night himself, he slowly kissed your cheek.
"Welcome to hell baby" he greeted, confused you closed your eyes and for once prayed you'd be able to wake up in where you left to only get the image of him drugging you and making you pass out. To then opne them and see the same sight.
"Wouldn't that make you?" She paused trying to yank the chains.
"Hades, satan the devil or whatever you humans call me for ruling the underworld. Then yes that's me and as you see, you're caged like a bug trapped in a spider's web. How cute. How naive to trust anyone you've properly met either. " he whispered the last bit in your ear as his lips traveled around your chest and neck leaving hickeys as he moved.
Groaning, you tried yanking the chains hearing a noise and hoping it ment it broke to realise no he fooled you with the sound of his nails knocking on the wood.
"Got you" he chuckled as you began scared, moving his lips towards your breast he sucked softly getting slight moans from your mouth. "Mm good girl continue with it an d maybe I'll spare your soul" he joked, sucking and groaning your other breast with his hands. Ignoring him and forcing your mouth to close. He raised an eyebrow and sat up, he then looked at your mouth and then his length.
"That wasn't smart now was it dsrling?" He asked, as his crouch hovered your mouth and his length being rubbed on your face as the other hand rested on the wall. "Noe open wide and if not, I can allways just shove it. Dont think about biting as i can manually remove teeth of needed" he mentioned as tears rolled down your eyes as he slowly entered his length.
"Good girl, suck it like that" he groaned, slowly moving his hips all the way in and out. With doing so he admired the trlaclesnt salty wetness driping from her eyes that he took a finger and wiped it. Caressing her face as he continued thrusting and groaning till he felt hard enough and then pulled out. Wiping her eyes again he grabbed the lube and posed the non negotiable question of
"May I pretty angel, take this as mine?" He whispered softly as he leaned down to her ear. Nodding yes a tear ran and he licked it clean, causing a slight shiver down her body. "Good" he replied, putting lube around his own length and stoking it on.
"If you cum on me will I get pregnant?" You asked shyly.
"Mm, well yes and that's my goal princes or should I say queen. Your body is mine after all." he tells, taking his fingers and tracing a cross between your chest as he watches a dark mark appear in a mini cross between your chest.
Crying harder knowing you've not only been kidnapping, but there was an even little chnace of seeing your family friends and well your little pet. "I love when you cry my love" he said softly as his fingers softly rubbed against you clit and his lips attach to yours. Knowingly you kissed back and surprisingly it felt like comfort but tasted like sin and poison. One your body will soon adapt to. As your mouths moved in unison, his fingers rubbed softly around your bud and you were finally able to relax and enjoy the feeling. He had an undeniable hold on your body, one your soul started to grow a liking too the longer her rubbed and kissed your lips. Soon you became hungry for more and grinded against his hand and with the hint he rubbed quicker as you moaned down his throat and his free hand now snaking behind your back. Moaning more you called his name, in which he loved begging you to say again.
"YOONGi!"you moaned louder as his stomach and cock felt it making it twitch slightly. stoping his finger he guided his tip and put his chin on your neck and slid in slowly, taking his time as you adjusted before moving faster. You pulled the chains trying to hold onto him but he shook his head no and softly held your body up with the help of the chains and began pounding into you.
No it was not a speed nor length you were used to, but the feeling you could by a heartbeat. You legs became weak, your back arched hard, your mouth could only stay open and your head was in a daze as he fucked you without mercy. His length was big enough to make you scream from the top of your lungs and beg for more. He loved that and too started moaning which soon started to sound like deep breathes and heavy grunts. He loved the warm, pulsing feeling of your pussy on him as it dripped with cum around him.
"Ah, fuck, That's hot!" he moaned loudly. Moving his hips closer, he pushed his length in deeper and the sounds of his hips crashing into yours echoed the room. You were now at a point of no return, all you could do was moan and take him, which only increased his horniness and overall arousal.
"I'm close!" yoongi groaned and panted as his hips movements slowed down, but the deepness was still there. Shopping, yoongi's body out of tiredness fell on top of yours and he kissed your neck softly. Without enough energy to pull out, he came deep, groaning in your neck and laying still. Both overly fucked out and deep breathing, laid there until yoongi got enough energy to unchain your hands and drink from the cup of blood that started to reek and fill the room. The room that once smelt like lavender and vanilla now smelled like sex and sheep's blood. Leaning down to kiss you, you kissed back with your body begging to ache like hell and body starting to contort you screamed in pain. Whispering something into your neck, he held you close to his chest as you grabbed and scratched his back till the blood came from it.
"Submit and it'll go quickly." he whispered tired as can be. Taking his advice, you closed your body and let it take over. Suddenly your eyes and hair became white as a dove and the pain stopped. Not only did he claim you as his, the kiss of blood crowned you queen of the underworld.
They laid naked as each could no longer have the strength to get up, but hold each other in a soft hug. Comferting and relaxing, considering what had to happen. They slept wedded that night, perfectly times as the full moon was now full and the ritual circle could light up red as the two came into harmony.
#bts fanfction#bts x reader#bts fics#bts angst#bts smut#yoongi fanfic#min yoongi#yoongi smut#yoongi demon#yoongi x y/n#yoongi x you#yoongi x reader#suga#suga x reader#bts#bts suga#min yoonki#min suga#suga x you#suga x y/n
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Food for thought
Howdy, I’m currently fighting 20mg of melatonin in my system to pose a question, and a half assed answer. Spoiler: it’s bkdk and mostly fanon. (Yes, this is an expansion of my previous post that’s right under this one.)
Katsuki Bakugou is an enigma to both the side of the fandom that adores him, and the side that despises him.
But why is he such a polarized character?
He certainly wins the hearts of most of the fandom, as he’s been consistently taking first place in the popularity polls. But there’s the presence of a very strong backlash against him because of his past as a bully, and what separates Katsuki from the rest as a character is: those who are against him, have refused to let go of the past. While nobody really excuses or romanticizes his behavior, most are able to understand that it’s a part of him that is absolutely essential to his character.
Personally, he’s my favorite character. There’s something about the way Horikoshi tells his story that makes me want to cheer for him.
So, what the fuck does that have to do with bkdk?
I realized that this stupid comment I made:
Is true. And not just true, it took me deeper than I intended.
I strongly believe that Katsuki isn’t particularly physically attractive. He’s strong, has amazing arms because of his quirk, and is well built as an obvious consequence of being an active student in the hero course.
Go to this post for screenshots and whatnot.
As I was reading the second light novel, I came across a few excerpts when the girls of 1-A and 1-B were talking about boys at a slumber party. And a few things stood out: (Keep in mind light novels are considered canon, written by Anri Yoshi who works with Horikoshi to sketch some scenes out.)
1. The girls think that while Kaminari is a womanizer, he’d make a loyal boyfriend
2. The girls also seem to unanimously believe that Monoma and Todoroki are the hot guys of the hero course.
3. They think Izuku is maybe too much of a fanboy
4. They whole heartedly believe Iida wouldn’t hold hands before marriage
5. Bakugou’s outstanding characteristic is his intelligence, not his looks.
Why am I making this a point? If you haven’t noticed, Katsuki has one of the biggest ‘simpnations’ in the fandom, in which a shit ton of people find him attractive. While it is just the way Horikoshi draws him that garners so much attention, it’s pretty much canon that most in story characters don’t find his looks as jaw dropping as some people have made them seem (me, I’m calling myself out here, since I feel like the only one who thinks this boy could walk on water).
What is extremely ironic about this is that a lot of fans completely overlook the fact that Katsuki is ridiculously smart, especially the fans that hate him. It’s a characteristic about him that is constantly reiterated time and time again but forgotten at the same rate. (i.e Katsuki placing 1st in the entrance exam, ranking 3rd in the class, sports festival analysis in which even Kiri has overlooked his smarts.)
The point I’m trying to make here is: since the story is told in Izuku’s perspective, what if it’s not just Katsuki’s looks that Izuku tells us about in a biased way, but Katsuki himself?
If you’re caught up, you have most likely seen the beautiful way that Katsuki’s character has developed. And if you’re like me, you probably guessed that Katsuki’s story was heading this way long before this chapter. But how? If to some, he’s just a kid who told a vulnerable Izuku to take a swan dive off the roof.
In 284-285, in the middle of war Katsuki is having heavy flashbacks from his past with Izuku as far back as middle school, even before the sludge incident that took place in chapter 1. He’s harboring overwhelming feelings of guilt.
Katsuki has never really dealt well with feelings, especially expressing those feelings. So what does he do? He uses his power to help Izuku control his, despite them being rivals.
Here’s the kicker, this chapter confirms that Izuku has never held anything against Katsuki. He doesn’t see the training as atonement the way Katsuki intended, because Izuku feels like there’s absolutely nothing to apologize for. But even before this chapter, Izuku simply gave off these same exact vibes by painting Katsuki in a good light.
I was in love with Katsuki from the moment I met him, how could a character so vile in his mannerisms and reckless in his treatment of others make me so happy and so sad when I looked at him?
For me, the answer lies within the protagonist, who’s wanted us to see him that way from the beginning. The people who hate Katsuki and refuse to acknowledge his growth have also failed to let go of the past the way Izuku did . That despite his ugly traits and his funny looking face, he is somebody complex and amazing inside.
He is beautiful.
#thanks horikoshi#reminder this is JUST A HEADCANON#katsudeku#dekubaku#bakugou katsuki#bkdk#bakudeku#mha#bnha#my hero academia#ktdk#midoriya izuku
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the twilight series suddenly makes 100% more sense if you read them under a specific premise that, i contend, is heavily supported by the text:
Much like Amy’s diary in Gone Girl, the books in the Twilight Saga are verbatim reproductions of in-universe diary entries carefully and deliberately created and curated by badass unreliable narrator Bella Swan as a means to achieve immortality.
Prerequisite assumptions:
1) Bella actively and persistently wants to become a vampire, both diagetically and (I contend) non-diagetically. The average vampire novel format often fails to capture realistic human behavior in one highly specific area: the protagonists are frequently mortals who grapple with the choice of whether to become a vampire. This is stupid, because being a vampire would obviously be dope as hell; particularly in the Twilight Universe, where vampires are not required to take a human life to survive, and indeed, have the capacity to live full and rewarding lives while integrated* into the human community.
(*integrated-ish; see Assumption 6)
2. There are too many coincidences for Bella to have encountered the Cullens by sheer chance, only to be the ONE person that Edward can’t live without (due largely to the novelty factor of not being able to read her ding-dang thoughts.)
3. Diagetically, the Volturi don’t even know Bella’s psyonic gifts until New Moon, but we also know that the Volturi scour the globe for recruits to enlist into the protection of their governing body.
4. Nobody wants to be a voiceless cog in a bureaucracy.
5. Nobody, and especially nobody in high school, wants to be a high school student forever.
6. Vampires in twilight are, as a group, cartoonishly terrible at disguising their true nature.
7. Forks is a backwater town approximately 3.5 hours away from the biotech hub of Seattle.
7. George W. Bush and Dick Cheney can eat my farts and they deserve to be preserved in this snapshot of an innocent author’s mind slowly unraveling.
Proposed timeline:
In 1993, there is a key system meltdown at a improvised biohacking startup in Seattle, rendering all innovative genetic modification experiments into a puddle of brown sludge that nobody can figure out how to dispose of per Federal regs, since they don’t even know what it is.
The broke founder of the startup, who for the purposes of this timeline I will call Jeff Bezos because that’s who it was, eventually grows tired of all the discussion about what to do, and just pops it in a barrel, drives a few hours out of town, and dumps it in a pond.
Bella Swan, a small child, is hanging out at a park with her family friend Jacob Black (and a ton of his friends) when they all decide to wade in a slightly murky pond. Thereafter, they are transformed.
Bella grows up as a normal, highly powerful mutant with a +20 to deception checks and wisdom saves. She lives in Arizona, but up until 2002, summers in Forks. While in Forks, she picks up on the local lore about a family of vampires who don’t eat people.
Because Forks (population: 17 + Charlie’s mustache) is boring, Bella bones up on the only interesting thing about it, i.e. Vampire Hometown baybeeeee.
In 2000, George W. Bush gets elected president, and his evangelical politics and general bumbling ineptitude informs Bella’s opinions on authoritative governmental entities.
In 2001, the Cullens make their intention to move back to Forks known, but they take a while because they need to pack all their stupid graduation hats and volvos, etc.
Later in 2001, a psychic Volturi scout rolls through Forks to ensure that nobody within living memory recalls the Cullens, and notices an anomaly in the psychic field.
The scout goes to confront Bella about joining the Volturi, and Bella immediately clocks him as a vampire, because vampires in the Twilight Universe fucking suck at looking/acting human. This leaves the scout in a bind: she’s too valuable to kill, but she’s a pre-teen, and therefore too young to be transformed per Volturi authority.
The scout warns her he’ll have to kill her if she discusses the existence of vampires with any human. He then tells her he’ll be back in five years, and begins to sweet talk her on how good life will be when she’s a vampire, beautiful, immortal, powerful, etc. Bella asks if she has to kill, and dude says “nah, actually there’s a bunch of vegetarian vampires who are moving back here soon. Fucking nerds, but otherwise they’re doing well.” Bella is all about becoming a vampire, because Bella is a rational actor.
Bella moves to Arizona, and as the wars in Afghanistan and Iraq are unjustifiedly initiated, she recognizes that while she DOES want to be a vampire, she does NOT want to be a foot soldier in any war that she can’t support. She needs a plan.
In 2004, Bella is watching her step-dad’s minor league baseball game when it occurs to her. On her own, she’s a target for the Volturi, but if she had some people to watch her back, she might be okay. Of course, nobody fucks with the Volturi on behalf of some rando human. She’ll need to con her way into a coven who’ll have her back and also give her that +10 to constitution via vampiric transformation, which she desperately wants because she’s a rational actor. And where are the non-volturi vampires that might have her back? Fucking Forks.
Bella moves to Forks in 2004, and upon seeing the Cullens, she immediately clocks them as vampires even though they left their “we’re all vampires” booty shorts at home, because, as previously discussed, vampires in the Twilight Universe fucking suck at looking/acting human.
Bella notes that all the vampires but one are paired off in heterosexual bliss, and takes note of the straggler as a potential vehicle to vampyrdom.
Bella figures out that Eddie can read everyone’s mind but hers, because Edward Cullen fucking sucks at looking/acting like a human who can’t read minds. Bella further observes that Eddie has a huge undead boner for her.
She’s found her mark. Now she just needs to convince him that she’s better off as part of the coven than on her own. Problem: Eddie’s a self-pitying insufferably guilt-striken perpetual adolescent who keeps himself busy by feeling sorry for himself because he’s a vampire, angst angst angst etc etc. Also, I think he’s Catholic, so add some more guilt in. She’ll have to win him over by convincing him that they’re destined to be soulmates.
What does a vampire used to having complete insight into everyone’s mind but his crush’s want? A method to know what she really thinks of him. Bella begins writing a “diary” knowing that there’s no way in hell Eddie won’t sneak in and read it. So she Gone Girls it, and begins to lay a trap to lure him in. That first diary? Twilight.
This was just in the movie but a stoner chases her around with a worm on a stick. Nothing to do with this theory, I just like that part of the movie. Where’s my spinoff about that guy?
Eddie won’t give Bella what she wants (eternal life) by the end of book 1, even though she asks him to EXTREMELY POLITELY. Time to hit the diary with some more promises of undying love.
Bella reconnects with her old friend Jacob and the rest of the Mutated By Jeff Bezos Boys. Alas, they cannot turn her into a physically powerful sexy immortal with a bite, so she’s still stuck with plan A) win over a whole family of vampires with big Mormon energy. It’s the long con.
Edward’s angst abruptly takes a swing towards terminal. He’s absolutely your classic sadboy, perhaps because Bella now has one (1) friend that he knows about.
When Eddie begins to drift away on account of Angst, Bella conjurs up a secondary love interest who, coincidentally, is ALSO a sexy supernatural entity, and is much less coincidentally just Jacob.
We should establish here that Edward is like a 107 year old white dude and so even though Diary!Bella pretends not to see it, Metatextual Frame Story!Bella knows that dude is super racist.
Jacob Black is three things: 1. Like Bella, a mutant (although one with shapeshifting abilities), 2.one of Bella’s oldest and most trusted confidants, and 3. down to clown on an elderly teenage vampire who keeps stereotyping him. Sure, says Jacob, I’ll take the form of a werewolf. He seriously thinks we’re all just beastmen, huh? Hey look at me now, I’m Regis Philbin because this is 2005 and Who Wants to be a Millionaire is still sort of relevant. Sick.
Edward does not like that Bella has one (1) other friend. Bella and Jacob plot to use this to their advantage and lure Edward back on the wings of jealousy.
Eddie gets himself into trouble on account of Angst and poor communication, so Bella has to go rescue him from himself/the Volturi.
Aro finally meets her and gets to test her powers, which impress him. Now she’s back on the fucking radar.
I forget everything that happens in Eclipse, so i have chosen to omit that part.
Eventually she extracts a quid pro quo from Eddie; i’ll marry you if you turn me into a dracula.
We don’t really call ourselves that, Wet Blanket Cullen replies, entirely earnestly.
Bella gets married at 18 in 2006, and Eddie starts to backtrack his promise about changing her. This won’t stand.
Well, look, he’s an elderly guilty catholic/mormon teen who probably still uses super racist terms, but she’s stuck on honeymoon island, he has certain angles that work for him, and seriously what are they gonna do but fuck? Bella’s alternative is listening to her “husband” drone on about his interests, which are almost certainly Car, How Do I Post a Minion Picture on Facebook, and Licorice Used To Be a Lot Cheaper in the Good Old Days.
Whoops a fetus.
Bella recognizes that she’s GOT to have this baby: time’s running out, and Bella knows that at least two of the Vamps in her coven will cut ties if she terminates or otherwise fails to carry this baby to term because of the conservative religious subtext. She’s going to have to stick it out for 9 months, even though it’s a risky call.
Bella gets what she wants after giving birth. “My time as a human is over, but I've never felt more alive. I was born to be a vampire.” That’s a direct quote. Except now she’s got a (pretty cute and easy) baby that she desperately wants to protect from Turning Into A Vaguely Religious Cullen Dressed Head To Toe In Cream Colored Wool.
Bella decides to fake her own death and escape with the kid and Jake so they can form i guess a detective agency. Bella will get “killed” by the Volturi, move to Sydney, and open up shop, and Jake will take the kid after her a few months later.
They’re gonna need a reason why Jake gets the kid though, and there’s only one reason to do anything amongst the Cullens: a heterosexual love interest with a super problematic age gap.
Jesus, Jake sighs, is Eddie really going to believe I’m in romantic love with your actual infant? Does he really think that little of me?
Yup.
Bella tries to draw the Volturi’s attention.
Works too well.
The Cullens call up all their vague acquaintances, who are at least kind of fun. Particularly that one dude who keeps getting angry about British conduct during the American Revolution.
Well, fuck, now the Volturi are bringing an army to fight their ragtag army of Vampires Who Are Cool And Interesting Enough That We Can Safely Presume They Are All Definitely Gay. Bella can’t let those guys die, they’re the first actually compelling vampires she’s ever talked to.
Bella saves the day because she’s OP.
All the Cool Vamps start packing up to leave and Bellz almost goes with them, but the Cullens would just keep sending missionaries after her if they knew.
Bella finishes her fourth journal with the vague warning that the Volturi are still out there somewhere and they miiiight just try and get her.
Two days later, she stages a scuffle and gets the fork out of Fucks. Her journals are the only clue.
Sirius Black and baby nessie follow once edward has stopped sobbing into his cream colored sweater and moved on to Extended Power Pouting.
Bella recruits her own army of fledglings.
Bella stages a coup against the Volturi and succeeds.
Bella sits on the iron throne with a hot lady vampire on each knee and they all kiss and stuff.
Nessie I guess forms a post punk band?
Edward dies from aspiration of a brussel sprout that he ate because he just wanted to feel something.
Charlie and Billy get married.
Charlie’s mustache develops a cult instagram following, providing them with a modest retirement income.
Jacob shapeshifts into Bill Murray and is always crashing weddings.
Bella’s stepdad is off in the B plot this whole time winning the world series with the help of a kooky angel.
There. Fixed. My soul is at rest.
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Gilded: Chapter 3: Power Over Me
Mobster!Steve x Reader
Summary: What more can you do than have a rad bachelorette party and then move to a house full of mobsters. It all sounds fun, right? Well, not according to your experience.
Warnings: mobster AU, drinking, swearing, surveillance, angst, smidge of fluff, violence, mention of bruises, fear
Word Count: 5737
A/N: A little late, I know I know, but I wanted to make sure the chapter was exactly how I wanted it. I keep thinking I will get to the wedding, and then some situations occur and I know I have to concentrate on them a little more. Than being said, I think we will finally see the wedding next! What do you think of this part? Did you like it? Is the reader a little less annoying? Let me know xx
Series Masterlist __ Masterlist
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The scene was supposed to be joyous, but, for some reason, the majority of what you felt was filled with sadness. Not for any particular reason, it was just the weigh of your decision finally settling in your heart and the realization hitting you that you would indeed be getting married in a week to a total stranger, who was a mobster, none less.
You chose it, you had to remind yourself as tears fought their way in your eyes. It was just momentary sadness overpowering you, the feeling that your wedding wouldn’t be filled with people loving and caring for you, that the day would be more about showing off Steve’s power over the world than showing his love for his new bride, for whom he had none. And you would be there almost alone: no parents, no extended family, and a very few close friends. Whom you loved dearly, of course, and without whom you wouldn’t even be considering taking such a step. You needed them there, and not just the two lovable idiots you lived with.
It was also people you’ve come to love during your university years as well as some coworkers, like Christy and Anja. Together it made around 15 people, which was actually a lot more than you had anticipated, but still. It would have to be Aidan walking you down the aisle, and just the mere thought made a choked sob escape your lips.
The sound brought the attention of the room to you, and before you knew it, you were enveloped in a bone-crushing hug from all the people there, everyone telling you that you should be happy, that this was a good thing. Of course, nobody except Caroline and Aidan knew the reality behind the wedding. All they thought was happening was that you fell madly in love with Steve Rogers, and now you two were tying the knot. You even overhead Aisha say that you were definitely pregnant, otherwise, you wouldn’t have rushed into it like this. You tried to assure everyone that there was no pregnancy at all, but, of course, people believed what they wanted, and you lacked the energy to go around the room and speak to them individually, denying what they formed in their heads.
It was Friday night, and you were in your apartment, surrounded by all those people who would come to your wedding. You sent a list of names to Steve that afternoon, and, after what you assumed was a background check on all of them, he agreed that yes, these 15 people could actually come. And when he did, you called an emergency meeting at your apartment, using it both as a way of inviting them to the wedding and as a kind of bachelorette party, where all you wanted to do was to drink heavily, eat a disgusting amount of carbs and pass out around dusk. Safe to say, all of your friends had been in, and by the time it was 11 PM, you were all tipsy, and people started to dance. Some (ehm, ehm, Caroline) even on a table, which was hilarious to the rest of you.
The sadness came and went all evening, but you were determined not to let it ruin your night. So, every time you felt like it was creeping up on you again, you just told somebody and let them hug you until you were feeling better.
Then, somebody came up with the idea to play Never Have I Ever, and since the tequila still burned in your veins, you agreed immediately. And so the game started. You were roaring like a pride of lions, each answer louder than the previous ones, but the most fun arose from telling each other funny stories.
“Ok, so this one time I was blowing off my boyfriend, right? And you know how much I hate the taste of sperm, and he knows it as well, but this one time he really insisted on my swallowing, and so when he finally came, I squeaked and pointed somewhere behind him so that I could spit the cum to glass under the table, and when he turned around I showed him my mouth, void of any liquid, and he looked super proud,” your friend Naila laughed as she told the story to the question: never have I ever swallowed cum.
The night was flowing smoothly, and soon, you saw that it was getting somehow lighter outside. And, sure enough, when you looked out of the window, you saw that the sunrise was coming in mere minutes.
“Guys, guys! The sunrise is here. Let’s go to the roof to enjoy it,” you yelled even though half of the people were already fast asleep. The few of you who were still barely alive, which was around 5 of you, staggered towards the door and crawled up the stairs to the highest levels, and when you opened the last door, you had New York underneath you.
You were wasted and exhausted, but the sight poured new life into you as you watched the early orange rays shine on one building at a time, waking up the city that never slept. It was magical, and it took your breath away. You felt your worries melting away as you saw a new day coming, and you thought it was a new day with many possibilities and hopes for you. You had nothing to lose, and Steve proved to you that he would, indeed, take care of you if need be. All would be if you just played your part and learned enough about Steve to be able to escape his wrath.
The exhaustion then hit your body just as the ray hit your face, and you waved at the drunk group watching the sunrise, each of them in their own realm of thoughts, and soon enough, you sauntered back to your room, where you fell asleep just like the rest of the bachelorette party.
A piercing tone woke you up with a start, and, for a second, you didn’t even know where you were, what time it was, or even what fucking century it was. The throbbing in your head prevented your brain from functioning properly, and so you rummaged through the pile of clothes next to your bed, fishing for what was obviously your phone. Gosh, how you hated the ringtone, and you reminded yourself to just mute your phone altogether because then nothing like this could happen again.
You picked up without so much as looking at the screen and just sneered a harsh what into the speaker.
“Well, good morning to you too, honey,” you heard Steve’s smug voice and rolled your eyes so hard the pain in your head increased. “Is this the way to greet your future husband? I don’t fucking think so,” he continued, and a considerable part of you contemplated just hanging up on him and his annoyingly sexy voice.
“Steve, I have no fucking idea what time it is, but it’s definitely not time for you to call me and want me to be nice. Give me a few good hours of sleep, and then we can talk, ok?” You hoped this would do it, but from the silence on the other side, you assumed he wouldn’t let be just yet.
“What happened? Did your bachelorette party get a little out of hand, and you went to sleep only after sunrise?”
You gasped, shocked how he knew any of it, and for the first time, the fog in front of your brain lifted a little bit. You checked the time, and seeing it was only 9 AM, you assumed that asshole woke you up on purpose if he knew so much about your nightly activities.
“How the fuck-“
“Language!” He yelled suddenly, and you flinched at the intensity of his voice. “I know everything, and I told you I would have somebody keeping an eye on you at all times. You’re only lucky the guy sleeping next to you is gay, you’d be in so much trouble otherwise, honey,” Steve spat, and the only sound you could muster was a long huff, as you regretted ever being born.
“What do you want, Steve? If you know so much, you must know that I’m beat and all I wanna do is sleep, with a guy in my bed or without him. So, if you have something to tell me, please do, otherwise, have a good day, and I’ll catch up with you later.”
“We’re gonna have so much fun together, you and I, Y/N. I’m calling because I wanted to let you know that your room is prepared and ready for you and that your bodyguard will pick you up at exactly 8 PM, so don’t be late. Clint will also help you carry all things you need. I’ll send you his number so that you can be in touch with him. Oh, and honey? Take some aspirin and go to sleep, you sound like you need it,” even through the phone, you could hear him smirk as he hung up and let you on your own once again. Thank God.
“Who was it?” Aidan asked sleepily from the other side of the bed, and you just grumbled some response, not really sure if he understood what you meant, but when he hummed and patted your outstretched hand, you took it as yes, I understand you mean your future husband Steve Rogers, nice talk.
The phone signalled you received a text, and when you looked at it, it was your bodyguard’s phone number and a directive, telling you to go to sleep already, because the dark circles under your eyes didn’t suit you.
Oh, how you wanted to kill this man already. He got on your nerves more easily than anybody ever before, and for a brief moment, you wondered why he affected you so. You didn’t even know him, and you shouldn’t let him tossing you back and forth, but here you were, pissed because you could just imagine how proud he was of himself that he woke you up and told you what to do so many times in such a short call.
Sighing, you got up from the bed and went to check the window to see if you could spot the nosy bodyguard ratting on you to Steve. You needed to have a word with him because he just couldn’t go running to Steve every time you blinked.
Looking around the street, you tried to spot a strange vehicle, one that didn’t fit into the street you grew to know so well. And, sure enough, there was a large SUV, much like the one you had driven with Steve before, and you noticed that the windows were tilted. Since your apartment was on the first floor, anybody from the street had a great view right into your flat, and because you passed out totally exhausted, you didn’t have the time, nor did you remember to shut your blinds.
You huffed and shut them now, cursing Steve and his nosiness because he wasn’t making your life any easier, and you weren’t even married yet. The year in front of you would be annoying and difficult, but maybe it would make you feel alive again.
Shaking your head, you didn’t let the memories flood your brain as you strode back to your back, plopped on it belly-first and fell straight asleep.
“Are you sure it’s everything?” Aidan looked around your now half-empty room, except for the furniture that you knew you wouldn’t need. Steve promised to give you a furnished room, and you took his word for it, so you just took the essentials, like your clothes and sentimental stuff. Marie Condo would have been proud because you still managed to get rid of a few things that didn’t spark joy!
“Yeah, and even if I left something here, I could still come, you know? It’s not like I’m never seeing you or this place again. I’ll still be like a 30-minute ride away,” you smiled soothingly at him, but he just shook his head, obviously fighting all the emotions swirling in his heart.
“Alright, alright. No crying. I’ll call you guys when I’m all settled, and Steve actually lets me be by myself, and I’ll show you the room, ok?”
Both Aiden and Caroline nodded speechlessly and then pulled you in a group hug.
“You sure you wanna do it? We can still make it seem like we kidnapped you and take you somewhere to Mexico, or Argentina, or wherever he wouldn’t find you,” Caroline whispered, and you laughed through the tears fighting their way out of your eyes.
“I’ll be fine, you’ll see. We will all have so much fun, and before we know it, the year is over, and I’m back here with you guys, having lived a little,” you smirked, and they nodded reassuringly, not really sure if it really was the best way to live a life, but they didn’t want to push you again. Your heart was set, and they both knew there was nothing they could do now. Except, of course, really kidnapping you.
“Miss Y/L/N, we should go. The boss said we should be there at 9 PM at the latest, and I would prefer if we could be a little early,” Clint said professionally, but you could see that he was afraid of what would Steve do had you arrived late. You didn’t want to start this weird-ass journey by pissing your future husband or making him hurt his employees (you didn’t know whether he would actually do that, but just to be on the safe side, since he did cut off a guy’s finger a mere few days ago).
You nodded and stepped from your best friends, looking at them and smiling brightly. You didn’t want any teary goodbyes, so you just showed them thumbs up and followed Clint out of the door. You knew there would be some tears when you left but didn’t think they would come as early as on the first step from your apartment.
Fortunately, there weren’t that many steps to go before you were out of the building and rushed into the SUV by Clint. It was dark already, but you didn’t want him to see you cry, so you swiftly pulled out your sunglasses and put them on, not saying a word to Clint as he started the car and pulled it into New York’s night traffic. The lights around you were almost blinding, and for a moment, you were glad you had the glasses on, but then another wave of regret and sadness hit you, and you had a hard time keeping in the sobs. Scratching your arms, you stared out of the window and took a few calming breaths, telling yourself to get a grip because you were about to enter the lion’s den, and you couldn’t show them any emotions.
You knew Clint knew what was going on, but he was gentleman enough not to comment on it. Still, you needed to make sure he understood this little episode was just between the two of you.
“Can I ask you something, Clint?” You said suddenly and saw his eyes flickering between the road and the mirror, meeting your eyes for a moment.
“Of course, Miss Y/L/N. However, I should warn you, I am not allowed to give you certain information,” he said formally, and you nodded knowingly.
“Yeah, right. If I asked you to keep a little secret from your boss, would you keep it?” You asked and nibbled on your lower lip anxiously.
He seemed to have thought for a second before he nodded his head in a manner telling you that there were things Steve didn’t need to know. His eyes met yours again before he spoke up.
“I’m now your bodyguard, and if I think the information kept from the boss is in your best interest, then I won’t tell him anything. For example, you smiled all the way to the apartment, no tears and no sunglasses. Though, I think you should powder your nose and dry your face,” he smirked, and you laughed a little, nodding gratefully and doing exactly as he said.
The car stopped exactly as you put all the supplies back into your purse, and you had a feeling Clint took a longer route to Steve’s house just to give your face the time to dry up and calm down. Checking the time, you saw it was 10 minutes before 9 and saw the relief on Clint’s face when he realized the same thing.
“Alright, I will take you to the boss and then will get the boys to help with your things. We won’t go through anything, but if you need our help when you’re unpacking, all you have to do is text me,” Clint said, walking you to the door.
The man you met on your first night there was standing as a sculpture at the exact same spot, and you wondered if he ever moved from that hallway. He did move towards you, gesturing to your purse, but Clint’s hand stopped him mid-motion.
“She’s clean. I’ve been with her the whole time,” he said sternly and with authority, and when he saw the first man taking a breath to protest, Clint just gave him a chilling frown, and the man stepped down, hung his head in defeat and let you through.
“It’s not a problem, Clint; I could have shown him the purse, you know?” You almost whispered as you walked through the empty rooms and hallways with Clint by your side.
“They need to learn to respect you, Miss. You are, after all, marrying the boss very soon, and they need to understand that you are not a threat,” he gave you a curt nod, and you blushed a little. You didn’t know what it was, but the way Clint spoke to you with so much trust and respect already made you feel much better. You knew it would be an issue, so having somebody on your side was a huge relief already.
“Thank you, Clint, I really-“
“Well, happy you two are best buddies already! Are you gonna braid each other’s hair and do each other’s nails soon too?” A voice snapped you back to reality, a voice you already knew too well. Steve was leaning against a door, his face stoic despite the mocking tone of his voice. Clint obviously tensed next to you, mumbled some apology and scurried out of the room, leaving you with Steve.
You just looked at him and crossed your arms on your chest.
“Do you need to be like this?” You asked incredulously, not really understanding why he had to be such an ass when all you did was having some sort of conversation with one of his loyal men.
“Like what, honey? You seem to forget who I am and what I can do to you and your fucking life,” he sneered when he finally pulled away from the door and marched right in front of you.
Your arms fell from your chest as you stared at him, trying to figure him out. Which, considering he was a prolific mobster, wasn’t the easiest task at hand. But you tried nevertheless and poked to see where was all this coming from. He obviously needed to be in control of every situation, always the centre of attention, and, you realized, it was probably this that pissed him off. You walked in, not really paying attention to him standing by the door but carelessly talking to somebody else. But his attitude was another thing entirely.
“What do you want me to say, Steve? That I’m sorry I talked to somebody else and that it won’t happen again? You know it probably will, especially since you assigned Clint with the task of taking care of me and making sure I survive this year with you, which is really all he had done in the 40 minutes I have known him,” you reasoned, trying to sound confident but not pushy. You needed to show him that he couldn’t just toss you around like he might have thought. You didn’t expect him changing his attitude altogether for you, but you, at least, hoped he would go easy on you.
He was seething but also thinking; you could see his mind going in overdrive to come up with something snarky and mean. But you were quicker than him, once again.
“Will you be so kind and show me to my room? I would like to get settled in before we start talking about the wedding.”
“There will be no talk of a wedding. All you have to take care of is go tomorrow and pick your fucking dress. Everything else is being dealt with. I won’t need you tonight, so you can go and be by yourself till tomorrow,” he snapped and walked away without saying another word.
Great, now you felt like you were grounded, and all you did was talking with somebody nice to you. You shook your head disapprovingly and headed in a direction you thought might have been your room, but after taking a few turns, you weren’t even sure you were in New York anymore.
“Hey, what the fuck are you doing here?” You heard from behind you, and before you knew what was happening, somebody pushed you forcibly against the nearest wall, pressing their elbow into your neck. You coughed, surprised, clawing at the man’s forearms and trying to let him loosen the press because it was getting harder and harder to breathe.
“I said, what the fuck are you doing here?” He yelled into your face, and you tried to tell him, but your voice wouldn’t come out. So, you just stared at him, tears filling your eyes before you heard a loud hey from somewhere behind you two and saw a man with long brown hair running towards you.
“Sarge, this woman was roaming around here. I think she is a spy,” the man still holding you said to the newly arrived guy, and all you could do was shake your head and tried to make yourself look as non-threatening as possible. Which wasn’t difficult considering you were in no position to be able to even defend yourself had the man decided to crush your trachea.
“Fucking idiot! That’s the boss’ bride! Let her go, you dickhead,” the man, sarge, growled, and you felt the pressure leaving your body. Which was all it took for you to collapse on the floor and start coughing uncontrollably, gripping your neck in your hands to protect it from any further disturbance.
“I-I, I didn’t know, Sarge! Don’t tell him. I thought she was some fucking spy. What the hell was she even doing here all alone, huh? It’s not my fucking fault she came sniffing around stuff that is none of her business,” the man tried to defend himself, but from the murderous gaze he received from the sergeant, he wasn’t very successful.
“Are you ok, Miss? Did he break anything? Is your head spinning? Are you feeling nauseous? Any of this?” He crouched down to your level and extended an arm to you, and you flinched instinctively, not feeling too sure who was your friend here and who wasn’t. So, to play it safe, nobody was your friend, and you’d be scared of them all, forever. Easy business.
The man saw your reaction and frowned even more but was persistent when he removed your hands from your neck to see an already-forming bruise alongside your throat.
“You need to talk to me, Y/N. Are you hurting anywhere?”
You coughed and grimaced because, yes, in fact, you did hurt and that all over the fucking neck and even your head. Which, given the man almost crushed your fucking throat with his elbow, wasn’t that surprising.
“I’ll be fine. And I wasn’t sniffing around; I was just looking for my room. I thought it might be somewhere here, and I would have asked if I saw anyone. But this place is like a fucking maze, and I was all alone,” you screeched, and the sergeant nodded and helped you to stand up. He was pulling out what looked like a phone, but you stopped him.
“Don’t call him, please. I’m fine. I just need to get to the room, so I can put some cold water on it, have a drink and go to sleep. Please,” you accentuated and saw the man weighing his options before he put the phone back to his pocket and nodded for you to follow him.
“I will tell him, just so you know. Steve needs to know about this, and we need to make sure you are introduced to the whole house the first thing in the morning so that this doesn’t happen again. But he needs to know. I will give you a few minutes to take it all in before I do call him, though,” he said with a resolution in his voice, and while you wanted to protest, you saw that it would have been to no avail. So, not saying another word, you let yourself in what was supposed to be your room and took it all in.
The walls were this very soft grey, which you actually preferred to the cold white you saw a lot all over the house. There was a king-sized bed against the main wall, framed with two bed-side tables and two matching white and gold lamps. There were many pillows on the bed and a plaid, grey and blue, throw as well, making it all feel very homey. You could see a large closet, where you could have easily fit ten times the amount of clothes you owned. The only other thing in the room was a table with a chair and some drawers, where you could picture yourself working and writing.
However, when you turned around, you saw something that caught your attention. An easel with a little table on wheels, on top of which was a palette where you could see yourself mixing colors left and right. You squealed, but the sound reminded you that you have just been assaulted and that you could admire the room later.
You took your time in the bathroom, inspecting your neck and hissing here and there when you touched it carefully. You knew the sarge was outside your door, probably counting in his head before he called Steve, and you were actually pretty surprised he wasn’t marching in already. Just when you thought of it, the door to your room flew open, and you heard Steve and the man talking (well, actually, more like yelling at each other).
“Where the fuck is she? I’m going to kill Drax. I swear to fucking God, man. How is it even possible that he does shit like this? They were all supposed to be briefed, for fuck’s sake. Imma have Sam’s ass as well for this. Fuck!” He yelled and kicked into something, which made you frowned, and you rushed out of the bathroom.
Steve spun around and almost ran towards you, cradling your face in his hands carefully and lifting your head so that he could have a clear view of the injuries. He was swearing under his breath, but you couldn’t help it and stare at him, wide-eyed. He was actually careful with you, sweet even as he took it all in, and when he was sure you wouldn’t die right there, he took a step back from you.
“Are you ok?” He asked after a moment, and all you could was just nod and stand there awkwardly, scratching your arms behind your back.
“Will you be able to find your room easier next time?”
“No, we took too many turns. But I won’t leave this room till morning anyway, and I will learn to stay out of the way very quickly, I promise,” you rushed to say, not really wanting to meet any of his crew alone again.
“You can’t be scared walking around here, honey. I will show you around right now, and I have already called an emergency meeting, and I want you there. This can never happen again,” he said gravely, and you understood this was probably his way of apologizing for something that wasn’t really all his fault. Well, he didn’t have to storm off and leave you there, nor did he have to scare Clint away, who was ready to show you to your room in the first place.
“Is it necessary, Steve? If I’m quite honest, I don’t feel too comfortable leaving the room right now,” you quipped, but Steve wasn’t listening anymore. He just grabbed your hand and pulled you towards the door. Weirdly, you felt a little better having the skin-on-skin contact with him because, at least now, nobody would be stupid enough to attack you.
You tried to remember the way and took in the details that would make you not lose your trail again, such as the red vase on one of the tables in the corner that looked just like the corner two minutes ago, but the vase was something you could remember, so you took a mental note of that and other little things that would serve for your safety, obviously. Because when Steve told you people would want you dead, you sort of didn’t expect those people would be in the house with you.
You walked through the spacious kitchen and the adjacent dining room to find yourself in what looked like a meeting room, with around 20 men gathered and scattered all over the room.
When Steve finally stopped, he let go of your hand, but he instinctively reached for you and pulled you against his side. You looked at him in slight disbelief again but didn’t say anything as he stared in front of himself till the room was as quiet as a freaking church during a sermon.
“Let me make this very quick: however lays as much as a fucking finger on Y/N here, I will kill you, and I won’t give a fuck who you are. You were briefed that I’m getting married to the woman I want, and because somebody wasn’t paying attention to the fucking briefing, evidently, my fiancé is now sporting a black neck, which she will have to cover for our wedding. Drax, you and I will speak tomorrow, I was ready to kill you, but I’m a reasonable man, so I will sleep and think of your punishment then. Now, any questions?” He asked threateningly, and you knew even if somebody did have a question, nobody would dare to ask it now.
And just as you predicted, the room was as quiet as before, and Steve waved his hand so that everybody was dismissed and they could breathe again. Just not in his presence.
“Sam, you stay here,” Steve added when he saw one of his closest men leaving the room as well.
“I will deal with him, Steve. I don’t know how that could have happened, but it won’t ever again, I promise. If it does, you can have my head, man,” the bulky man said and smiled warmly at you.
“By the way, hi, I’m Sam. I’m like the muscles here, you know? So, if you need to pick something up, I’m your guy,” he said with a wink, and you chuckled but took his hand to shake it.
“Nice to meet you, Sam, and I will remember that, thank you.”
“Alright, now, we have all the pleasantries behind us, you can go back to your room and go to sleep. And Y/N, if anybody as much as looks at you the wrong way, you tell me, ok? This marriage might not be a genuine one, but none of these assholes knows that or should care about that. They should protect you just like they protect me, and I don’t care what they say. I can’t have my fucking wife scared to walk these halls,” he was still frowning as he was saying all this to you, but you could see he was much more relaxed than when all the men were in the room. These two, the sergeant whose name you still didn’t know, and Sam, were obviously close to Steve because despite the winks Sam gave to you, Steve didn’t make a scene, nor did he give you the pointed looks when others were around. Still, you were on thin ice, and there was too much drama for one day for you to try and challenge him in any way.
“Ay ay, Captain,” you chuckled, and the corner of Steve’s mouth actually moved a little, so you took that as a good sign.
“Alright, I will try and get back to my room and call it a day because tomorrow is an important day! So, nice to meet you, gentlemen, and I will see you soon, I guess,” you waved at them awkwardly, and Sam waved back enthusiastically as you left the men to themselves.
“She is actually quite nice,” Sam summarized, and winked at Bucky, who just rolled his eyes at him in annoyance, having just enough of Sam’s antics for one day.
“Yeah, yeah, she actually is, when she’s not talking back and challenging every fucking thing I say,” Steve complained, and it was a turn for both men to roll their eyes at their best friend.
“Oh yeah, because you love when they’re meek and quiet, we forgot. C’mon, man, somebody fucking choked her today, and she was still standing here with her head held high, keeping it together like a fucking pro. I say she is perfect for you,” Sam said defensively when he saw the murderous stare from his friend/boss.
Good thing Sam didn’t see you in your room because as soon as you closed the door behind yourself, the tears just streamed down your face, and small sobs left your lips. You were glad the day was over and dreaded what the next day would bring.
Next Chapter >
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Bpp, I hope those people who were doubting BTS’ members solo debut are for sure annoyed by how big the first two debuts have been so far. It says something about the trust in the member’s solo selling capacity is that Jhope had Lollapalooza and now Jin will be having his first debut at a freaking Coldplay concert!!! The powers that be *know* that they each have the recognition and selling capacity—like I doubt Chris’ label wpuld’ve okayed him performing them with this surprise announcement if they weren’t sure if he had the individual star power and recognizability???? Not to mention it speaks so much to Jin’s own relationship to Chris himself!! I’m not looking forward to the expectations this past two precedents are building tho 😅 i’ve already seen some skirmishes happening bec of jin’s physical cd vs jhope’s digital release, and it wasn’t even solos doing it… altho i’m still pretty peeved at the lack too, the limited vynils didnt help at all?!! but I hope Army doesn’t let ourselves forget that each member’s solo promo will be individualized and to not let solos agitate us to starting drama…
**
Hi Anon,
I’m only just getting to posting your ask now because between Jin’s Astronaut release, Riri’s Chadwick tribute, and other things happening at the time, I was kinda swamped and since your ask really just states the obvious, I triaged your ask to post later.
I like asks like yours that state things that are obvious to see. Because sometimes, it’s necessary to. We can all see how well Chapter 2 is going for BTS. We’re all on here, both ARMYs and those still hooked on BTS/ARMYs for whatever reason, every week or so talking about some new project they’re on. We can recognize how huge of a deal it is for a Korean solo act to headline a Western music festival for the first time, the sheer insanity of this showing being that artist’s solo debut, and noting this is after BTS had turned the city of Las Vegas into a festival of their own just months prior.
Coldplay is probably the only band active today that can rival BTS in pure star power and name recognition. And seeing that cultural connection, hearing Korean spoken by a white English man to thousands of Argentines because of a SeokJin of BTS, is just really fucking cool. I keep saying, the way BTS center their language and culture in these collaborations is like nothing else you’ll see anybody in k-pop being even able to attempt. It’s the sort of representation that I can only see BTS doing at this point. Perhaps in about 5-ish years some other acts will catch up to this, but right now, no one is doing it like them.
**
As to the format the solo roll-outs have taken and will take, that’s not a conversation I’m not going to bother engaging in at all because this is the perfect example of a waste of time. None of the guys have zero say in those matters. And while I understand the ARMYs upset about the different formats, ultimately at the crux of it, those are excuses. ARMYs have worked with less and done more. If people want to show up, they will, regardless of the music format. Personally, I thought the design was a bit hideous (a tiny cardboard box? Really?) but I was surprised to find out Weverse albums has even better sound quality than Apple Music. And this for me was enough to say fuck it to everything else. I’ve never been the sort to collect albums and merch anyway. If you have not heard what Arson and Future sound like on that app, and you’re an audiophile, do yourself a favour and listen to it ASAP.
It’s so interesting to me the things Hybe is clearly spending money on. Weverse Live, not really. But Weverse albums? Absofuckinglutely.
There’s a deeper dissatisfaction happening with Hobi-biased people (and solo stans) towards Hybe and the fandom and all this album/format issue did was inflame it. But as I’ve said before, in Chapter 2 expect issues like this to become the norm especially when the Maknae Line start their solo releases. It will do nobody any good giving any of these quips oxygen. I intend to focus on what the boys release (through Hybe) and support them if I like the music.
It’s honestly that simple for me.
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What are your favorite and most despised ship dynamics in literature
Ooooooooooooh this is gonna be a long list
FAVOURITE (relation)SHIP DYNAMICS:
1. We were both part of enemy factions and from the moment we met we absolutely hated each other, until by some circumstance we were forced to make a temporary truce, and now that we've worked together we've developed a sort of grudging mutual respect, but oh shit now the truce is over and I like you too much to kill you
2. I am significantly younger than you and have a MASSIVE hero-worship sort of crush on you, and you've noticed but keep acting like you haven't, and over time my crush has faded and now you're basically a parent/older sibling and oh my GOD it's embarrassing to think I ever liked you like that, ew ew ew ew ew, please nobody ever mention it again
3. You're a dumb punk idiot and I'm your parent now. Stop being a dumbass. Now let's cry, talk about your feelings, and develop a healthy found family dynamic that helps build you into an emotionally stable and happy adult that only sometimes commits crimes
4. You're a batshit crazy lunatic with the IQ of a coked-up MENSA genius, but you forgot to sleep three days in a row and ran into traffic, so I'm going to teach you some basic life skills and you're going to help me be more adventurous and together with our one collective brain cell we're going to pass as functional adults
5. My humongous and powerful significant other may appear to be a kind dumb bag of rocks, but they are full of gentle wisdom, and between the two of us it is I, the small one who appears very clever, who has to be held back from doing dumb impulsive bullshit
6. We've had sex before and decided it wasn't our thing, so now we mostly just meet up in each other's apartments to eat snacks in our underwear and watch bad reality TV. Some of our new romantic partners have been possessive dicks about it, but those ones don't last. I wish you'd stop peeing with the door open, you fucking degenerate, I don't care that we've seen each other naked. Do you still have your key to my place?
7. Everyone keeps assuming we're dating, but we're basically siblings at this point. Who wants to commit arson?
8. We met in jail. We were there for very different reasons.
9. I'm a wild card with a sketchy past who secretly just wants to settle down with someone special. You're a play-it-by-the-books turbo nerd with a mile of repressed crazy just itching for an excuse to go feral. We're going to get married in Vegas
DESPISED (relation)SHIP DYNAMICS:
1. You're a gigantic asshole who keeps negging me and somehow it's working because you're pretty and I have no self esteem, and this would be an interesting plotline if it wasn't framed like it was a good thing.
2. I am a man with important man things to do and you, a woman, have no greater dream than to have children and take care of me. If only I would settle down and be a father before you fall inexplicably I'll or are killed by my enemies irvine of my experiments. I'll remember you by a secret photo I hold onto and nothing else, because you had no independant hobbies or interests.
3. You're famous and you noticed me and now you're dating me after 5 minutes and you're perfect in every way and think I'm flawless, this is the author's cathartic fantasy and that's totally fine, it's just not my personal cup of tea
4. I'm a virginal waif who's never done a thing wrong in my life, nobody values me and I am bullied and mistreated by all, except you, handsome stranger, who's going to swoop in, fight all my battles for me, and whisk me away to a fantasy romance away from my horrible and wretched jealous family and snide, spiteful friends. This is still a totally valid fantasy, again, it's just not mine
5. You constantly mistreat me but I forgive you because I know deep down you mean well.
6. I'm in love with you forever but won't tell you till I'm literal seconds from death, and you'll forget me almost immediately.
7. We're kind and sweet and perfect for each other but we're going to die in about 5 seconds for shock value.
8. I'm in love with a blood relative and it's played out as sweet instead of super, super gross
9. We're both actively cheating on perfectly decent people, and it doesn't matter because of how in love we are
10. Isn't it fun how we both don't give a shit about goddamned anyone?
11. I was a cheerleader and you were the quarterback and we got married right after highschool and now we live in the suburbs with 2 kids and a labrador retriever, you work as a dentist and I'm a soccer mom with a book club and we're always happy and perfect and straight A school union bake sale vanilla bean store-bought icing sugar cupcakes and I'm actively vomiting
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Glimpses: Part 5 (Kathryn Hahn x Fem!Reader)
Part 1 / previous chapter <<< >>> next chapter
Summary: Just a random Morning.
Word Count: 1.5k
A/N: I’m sorry this is rather short once again, but the middle of the week is usually my busiest time with uni and work and all. @zafirosreverie keeps saying that you guys are most likely happy about every single word posted, so I hope nobody actually minds if some chapters turn out to be a little shorter than others. Besides that: Enjoy! Hope everyone is having a great day!
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It’s been four days since you’ve left the hotel. That’s four days in which you haven’t heard from Kathryn. It drives you crazy and gets to you more than you want to admit. You’ve talked to Alex about it and the both of you agreed that she must be very busy right now because there is no reason for her to ghost you. Or is there?
You have to listen to Alex more. She always preaches how worrying doesn’t make any sense. “Worrying only means that you suffer twice, Sweetheart.“, she says and sometimes you feel like that’s the smartest thing someone has ever told you.
It’s time to pace up and down in your room, again. Your phone has become you biggest enemy and you know it’s childish, you really know, but you just wanted all of this to mean something to her, too, and the realization setting in that it doesn't just doesn’t sit right with you. Looking at the clock on the wall, you realize it’s just past 11 and your mom should be back from her shopping spree any minute. You stayed home, even though you had your day off today. But considering your current worries, you just didn't feel like leaving the house.
The problem about all of this is that your dear Kathryn Hahn doesn’t have social media, which is why you have no clue what’s happening in her life right now, at all. But then again, there is not much happening lately, anyway, so how much could there be to tell you? Wandavision just aired and she had lots of press to do, which is now finally calming down again. Good for her.
Your life is boring, too. In between university and work, you’ve got time for an occasional movie night with Alex over Facetime here and there, but other than that everything is going kinda slow right now. On second thought, though, how boring can life be when you literally just met your favorite actress? Ironic, that you’ve met her before you’ve met Alex. Online friendships are wild.
A noise right outside of your window grabs your attention and you move your blinds to check on it. It’s a beautiful summer day, the sky is blue, the bluest kind and the clouds up there are so tiny and fluffy, it reminds you of little pieces of cotton candy. You keep your blinds closed all day in summer since it gets pretty hot in LA and, coming from upstate, you don’t enjoy that as much as the locals. Looking straight down in front of your house, you see your mom, who is just arriving home, about to unpack groceries from the back of her car. Tossing your phone onto your bed, you run downstairs to lend her a helping hand.
Your mom, a sweet lady with dark hair and loving eyes, is very thankful as you appear at the front door and plants a short kiss on your temple before handing her bags to you. “Thank you, dear.“ You smile. It has always been just your mom and you and the relationship you guys were having is great. Even though you don’t agree on everything, life with her is easy and you feel at peace knowing she is around. In a way, your mom is your best friend, too.
When you came out to her, just a while back, she wasn’t shocked or anything, no, quite the opposite actually. After you told her all about it, it felt like she was loving you just a tad bit more for truly being you. She actually supports you in everything you do. Thinking about that, you squint your eyes trying not to cry, since it is still making you very emotional.
You place the bags on the counter and help her sort through them to put the groceries away. “Thank you so much, Y/N.“
She walks past you and shortly places her hand on your forearm as she puts her bag down on a kitchen chair.
Your home is more than big enough for the both of you. The ground floor is pretty much an open space with a beautiful white marble-colored kitchen that leads into a living room that is characterized by a large mint green couch, a little darker than the mint green color that fills the walls. There is a small electronic fire place in the corner and a rather big tv is hanging on the wall. Scanning the place, your heart fills with warmth as you remember the endless hours you have spent with your mom sitting on that very couch, watching classics after classics. Movies really are your kind of thing.
Your mom sees the way you look at the space. “It’s time for another movie night soon, isn’t it, Hon?“ You nod eagerly and wrap her in a big hug.
“Yes Mom! Let’s watch something on Friday, I would love that! Your choice of movie!“ You're beaming.
Lately, with all the work and school stuff you have going on and the time you spend online, you feel like you are losing touch with your mom a little, even though you try to eat dinner with her every single night.
Looking at your mom, you can tell how happy it makes her that you're actively making time for her. She looks at you a little too long, though. You can tell she is trying to read you by the way her eyebrow is raised, just a little, and the fact that she is holding on to the kitchen counter with one hand has her knuckles turn a little too white. Neither of you says anything as if she is waiting for you to come forward. You don’t. She sighs.
“Are you alright, Honey?“ You mom lets go of the counter and faces you directly.
For a moment, you think about if you should tell her. But tell her what? About how you have met Kathryn and, essentially, spent a night with her? You can’t. After all, Kathryn is still a stranger and she would be so mad if she knew. But at the same time your mom and you share anything and everything, so you might very well just go for it.
You consider your options, but the fact that Kathryn hasn’t contacted you yet holds you back. If it was a one time thing, she really doesn’t need to know and worry about it all. You don’t want her to worry. You opt for the option not to spill and shoot her a forced smile “It’s fine, Mom. I’m just tired and missing Alex. That’s all. As always.“
She nods and you can tell that she doesn’t fully believe you by the look she has on her face. Her eyes give away so much, you got this from her. Hiding things from other people really isn’t your best trait. But then again, you don’t want it to be. Honesty is very important to you, always has been, which is why your friendship with Alex works so well, because she is an open book ready for you to read at any given moment.
You remember the time and the fact that Alex is probably on her way to bed right now. She didn’t have the best day and you want to talk to her, just for a few minutes, before she drifts off to sleep. You tell your mom and, of course, she completely understands and tells you to just be back downstairs in an hour latest to have lunch with her. Planting a short kiss on her cheek, you grab a drink from the counter and make your way upstairs, already trying to remember where you put your phone.
It’s easier to find than you expect. When you open the door, the room is still set in darkness, the sun just barely finding its way through the blinds, but the phone, lit up by a notification that’s just coming in, illuminates the space around your bed.
Thinking it must be Alex, who is shooting her daily after-work-update your way, you jump onto your bed, kicking down half of the pillows and blankets on it in the process. You catch your favorite one, a light colored fall blanket with orange pumpkins on it, right before it touches the floor. Thank God, you think, as you pile it under your chin to use it as a pillow while you reach for your phone.
Alex had indeed texted you, but not just now. The notification lighting up your phone consisted of a picture. A platter with nicely decorated breakfast on it is looking at you, a pool (on what looks like a roof top) in the background. The caption is short, nothing special, but to you it means the world.
„This made me think of you. xx K.“
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#5: The One With Astruc's Self-Insert
In my introductory post, I said the main inspiration for this blog was @hypocrisyofandrewdobson. For those who don't know, Andrew Dobson is an infamous webcomic artist known for drawing webcomics that tend to demonize people he's come across in public or people who disagree with him online (either critical of his art or his political views), while portraying himself as the victim or wise man calling them out on their differing beliefs.
If you want to learn more about this guy who I consider to be far worse than Astruc, check out the blog in question. And no, I don't know why he draws himself as a blue bear.
Why am I talking about this? It's one thing for some schmuck on the internet to use his work to respond to criticism, but the creator of a popular animated series dedicating an entire episode to attacking his critics and trying to get others to feel bad for him is another story.
The second episode of Miraculous Ladybug's third season, “Animaestro” served as a wake-up call for fans (myself included) to make them realize how immature Astruc could be. The plot centers around the premiere of a movie about Ladybug and Cat Noir directed by Thomas Astruc, who voices himself in the original French dub.
And this isn't just a brief cameo like what Stan Lee did in the MCU. Astruc is the Akumatized person this episode, so there's naturally a lot of focus on him. Throughout the first half of the episode, Astruc portrays himself as this timid man who nobody recognizes or respects, like this idiot who doesn't know what animation is.
Doorman: This is a private event, sir.
Astruc: Huh? Excuse me? I'm Thomas Astruc, the movie director.
Doorman: You filmed Cat Noir and Ladybug? What are they like in real life?
Astruc: Er, it's an animated movie. It's all cartoon characters. We don't actually film anyone. See, there's this whole team that draw the chara—
Doorman: Whatever. Who would want to see Ladybug and Cat Noir as cartoon characters?
Get it? Wasn't that meta joke hilarious? This is how much I was laughing:
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And Astruc continues to get about as much respect as Rodney Dangerfield when he interacts with other characters like Jagged Stone and Chloe.
Jagged Stone: Ladybug is one of my best buds! I can't wait to see her movie!
Astruc: Well I—I'm the director, so actually it's more my movie, so to speak.
Jagged Stone: Oh, so you're the one who created the story?
Astruc: Well, technically the screen writers wrote the story, inspired by Ladybug's exploits.
Jagged Stone: Oh, okay. So you did all the drawings?
Thomas: No, no. The animators do all the drawings.
Jagged Stone: So what do you do then?
(Later on...)
Chloe: So you're the one responsible for this movie?
Astruc: Yes, yes! Exactly! That's me!
Chloe: Then you were the one who left Queen Bee out of the trailer. You're lame, utterly lame.
I can't believe Astruc had a scene where he interacted with Chloe and didn't insult her at all.
The episode is determined to make the audience feel bad for Astruc. Nobody respects him and what he does. Isn't that saaaaaad? Nobody cares about animated film directors like Walt Disney or Tex Avery anyway. Not even these stupid children understand how hard Astruc works.
Several Children: Ladybug! Where's Ladybug?
Astruc: Hey there, kids!
Teacher: Ladybug isn't here children. We came here to meet the director of the movie. Children: (frowning in disappointment) Aww.
(Astruc looks visibly disappointed.)
Way to insult your primary demographic, Astruc. I thought you said kids have a better understanding of these stories when people criticized the writing of a certain episode (It's that scene in “Puppeteer 2” if you're curious/don't value your sanity).
It's almost like you're using that as an excuse to half-ass your work while still getting to claim this show is so groundbreaking.
In case you can't tell, “Animaestro” is one of those episodes. The ones where the showrunners decide to dedicate an entire episode to attacking critics of the show in a blunt fashion. Whenever a show addresses criticism, they either create an obvious strawman character to parrot the opinions of fans who don't like their work, or have someone defend the show and insult the critics directly.
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The problem isn't that they're ignoring criticism. It's their show, and they aren't obligated to listen to critics or fans who don't like the direction the show is taking. On the other hand, they aren't obligated to fight back like this and treat their audience like crap. Any show that does something like the three clips I showed you usually comes off as petty and immature because they dedicate so much time to insulting the critics.
Even during the Akuma fight, Astruc has to call out Ladybug for having problems with his movie in-universe, obviously representing critics of the show Astruc claims have no right to criticize the show while it's still airing.
Ladybug: What's with that trailer too? I am not scared of cats, at all.
Astruc/Animaestro: You haven't even seen the movie and you're already slamming it?
Cat Noir: He does have a point, you know.
Ladybug: I wasn't slamming it. It's called constructive criticism!
Yeah, how dare Ladybug be angry that this movie is portraying her as a powerless coward dependent on Cat Noir as opposed to a confident and brave superhero. She just doesn't understand the genius of Thomas Astruc!
And of course the character Astruc claims is “perfect” is the one to take his side.
And that's another problem with this episode, the metatextual references. Before he gets akumatized, Astuc says he spent three years of his life working on his movie. I get that time in this show is weird (we somehow had episodes taking place on the first day of school, Christmas, Valentine's Day, and the first day of Summer), but how did Astruc's self-insert work on a movie based on a superhero who has only been active for a year? Meta-wise, it's an obvious reference to the scorn Astruc has gotten from fans after working so hard on his show, but the only people who would get that reference are the ones who are aware of Astruc's reputation online.
Self-Insert aside, I actually think the titular Animaestro is one of the more visually impressive Akumas featured on the show. Animaestro takes on several forms based off several different forms and eras of animation, like flash, anime, rubber hose, and they all stand out. Granted, some of them are obvious parodies of other characters like Goku or Sailor Moon, but the actual Akuma fight is fun to watch. According to the Mexican Miraculous Ladybug Twitter account, this episode took two and a half years to create, and it shows. It's too bad the story behind it is completely insufferable, almost like the cartoon equidistant to Pixels.
But then comes the part that honestly makes the episode worth it, mainly for how unintentionally hilarious it is. Do you want to know what Animaestro's weakness is? Do you really want to know?
Animaestro is physically incapable of moving unless someone is watching him. I am not making this up.
Ladybug and Cat Noir literally defeat Animaestro by getting everyone to stop paying attention to him.
I could make so many jokes with this, but I can guarantee you're already thinking of something just as good, if not better, than whatever I write.
And there's the end where Astruc gives Marinette his ticket to the movie, which prompts Marinette to kiss up to him for no real reason.
Astruc: Sorry, I guess you don't know who I am either.
Marinette: Of course do. You're Thomas Astruc, the movie director!
Astruc: She recognized me. Somebody actually recognized me!
Nothing happened to make her change her opinion on the Ladybug movie, she didn't really say anything to him earlier in the episode that connects to this exchange, and outside of a few lines Animaestro said, she doesn't even know why he got akumatized (even though ironically she and Chloe accidentally contributed to it because of the awful subplot involving Kagami I talked about last time). If anything, it comes off less like she actually appreciates Astruc's work, and more like she's stroking his ego just to keep him from getting akumatized again.
So yeah, this episode is awful, and the fact that it came out right after the controversial “Chameleon” only proved to show what kind of direction the show was taking this season.
But honestly, even if Astruc still wanted to make about how he doesn't get enough respect the episode could have potentially. All he had to do was make a simple change: Instead of making it about validation for Astruc as a creator, make it about validation for animation in general.
It's a common misconception that animation is only used for shows and movies aimed at children, so the episode could reflect it. Instead of the huge turnout where several celebrities appear at the premiere, instead, the turnout could be a lot smaller, with the media dismissing it as some stupid kiddie flick. Instead of getting akumatized because he gets humiliated in public/getting no respect from anyone else, Astruc gets akumatized because he sees the audience didn't go wild for the movie after the premiere. All he can hear them say is that it's just “kids stuff”.
So when Astruc is Animaestro, he goes on about how important animation is. How it's helped produce propaganda since World War II. How it helped improve special effects in big blockbusters. How the medium is used to create movies that simply can't be filmed on a physical set.
After defeating Animaestro, Ladybug shows up to talk to him. She had seen the movie earlier, and actually enjoyed it. She had a few problems with the story, but they were just minor nitpicks and inaccuracies Astruc wouldn't know about, and she was blown away by the animation. She tells Astruc not to be deterred by his critics, and continue to do what he does. As a designer in her civilian life, Ladybug knows the joy creating brings her, and both she and Astruc want to spread that joy through their work.
Back at the premiere, Astruc thinks about what Ladybug said to him when he sees some kids reenacting a scene from the movie. Astruc walks over to them and asks what they thought of the movie. They said they loved it and how energetic it was. When he tells them he is the director, the kids' faces light up and they say they want to do what he does when they grow up, bringing a smile to Astruc's face.
Isn't that a much more humble approach instead of what we got? It would have helped Astruc come across as more sympathetic, especially with animation fans. But instead, we got an entire episode of Astruc whining about how misunderstood he is.
And you know the footage used for the movie at the beginning? Remember that, because I have a huge rant about it saved for a later post.
For now, here’s an example of a creator appearing in his work done right.
youtube
#immaturity of thomas astruc#thomas astruc#thomas astruc salt#miraculous ladybug#miraculous ladybug salt#animaestro#marinette dupain cheng#ladybug#adrien agreste#cat noir#chat noir#jagged stone#chloe bourgeois#queen bee#queen b#star trek: the next generation#the simpsons#harley quinn#teen titans go#thundercats roar#thundercats#spider-man#stan lee
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5 star conversation (reggie peters x reader)
I SAW THIS REQUEST AND SCREAMED I WAS SO EXCITED!!
word count: 4.9k (i can’t believe i wrote that much omg)
5 star conversation masterlist
place one: a 1 star motel
“I can’t believe this!”
Julie and I gave each other warnings look as he leaned against each other. That was Flynn’s “Something is going wrong and it’s the other person's fault” yell, and with how stressful the bus ride was I could tell this was worse.
“What’s wrong?” Reggie leaned over in his chair, his hood covering his face as we hid from camera flashes in the corner of the fancy hotel.
Julie shrugged, looking back to her phone and the Instagram edits of the band she had been tagged in.
“Guys, guys,” Alex did a awkward jog as he came back from the bathroom, the iconic pink hoodie pulled over his head and the front of his baseball hat sticking out.
“What?”
“I don’t think we have rooms,” Alex fell back beside Luke, his anxiety radiating from one person to another.
“Huh?”
We’ve had the tour planned out for months, each state planned and perfectly laid out for the perfect amount of work and play. There wasn’t a chance that we didn’t have the room for tonight, impossible.
“Flynn is too smart for that,” I leaned back, ignoring the way Reggie still leaned forward while his elbows on his knees watching me. It was weird, I knew it was Reggie but the way he sat and the fact I couldn’t see his face made it feel like a different person.
“(Y/N) right, Flynn way to put together for that,” Julie brushed off, hitting my shoulder to show me the edit she had found. It was of Reggie and I from a few shows ago, Flynn had been taking videos to help keep the fan active on us and she caught a video of Reggie and I fake rocking out on the empty stage.
It moved from that to a picture of Reggie and me in the costume store for the Halloween show, little fairy-like hearts floating around us. I smiled at the thought, grabbing Julie’s phone and sending the edit to me.
“Well, we don’t have rooms,” Flynn walked back, not giving any warning as she collapsed on top of Julie and I.
“I told you!”
Alex stood up, pointing his finger between Julie and I, a little smirk forming before he realized the weight of the words.
“What happened?”
“They didn’t tell me that rooms held for over 2 months have to be reinstated two week before or they cancel it,” Flynn didn’t move, laying over Julie and I with a broken spirit.
“I was looking forward to sleeping in a room, those bed’s on the bus suck,” Luke crossed his arms and pouted, looking like a kicked puppy.
“I don’t mind them,” Reggie smiled, bouncing in his seat slightly.
“It’s because you’d never fallen off the top,” Alex bit back, still mad about the sharp turns that have sent him flying the last few nights.
Flynn finally moved off Julie and I, saying nothing as she typed away on her phone. She walked away without another word, looking us back in the corner with hoods up.
I played with the sleeves of my own hoodie that had the new Julie and the Pathoms merch sketch.
“Oh look at this one!”
Julie showed me her phone again, this time a thirst trap edit. Her excitement bought the boys attention to us, all moving to look over my shoulder at the edit.
It started with a few of Julie with her amazing stage gear and a few photos from her instagram, neon letters over her head read “The Singer''. Then jumped to the few videos and pictures of Flynn that Julie and I would post behind her back, this time the neon letters read “The Manager''. Next was my face, bright smiles and a few of me backstage with an old Sunset Curve tee and sweat rolling down my back, the words said “The Designer ''.
I read the caption, smiling at “They carry the band” and laughing as the guys talked about the story behind each photo.
“I took the one of you in my old shirt,” Reggie smiled, staying beside me with his arm around the back of my seat. I did my best to ignore the butterflies, which became easy when Flynn came back with a smile.
“I found a motel across the street that will take us,” she spoke with pride, rightfully so as she saved us from another night on that bus.
“Oh I love you,” Alex jumped up, his arms wrapping around Flynn in a heartbeat. Julie smiled, standing up and putting the phone in the pocket of her hoodie.
“Come on, up,” Reggie jumped up, holding a hand up from me as I had started to slip down in my seat. I smiled, taking his cold hands and standing completely up with a smile.
“Thank you Reginald,” I winked, following the others as we made our way to the front of the hotel. I could already hear the crowd waiting for us, their cameras probably at the ready to take some pictures of the uprising band.
“Hoods up soldiers,” Luke announced, keeping Julie close as they were already openly in a relationship so nothing too bad could be made out of them. Alex stood in front of me, Flynn close behind as Reggie was an inch behind me.
I said nothing when I felt a small hand on my back, too caught up in the loud voices and the calling of our names.
“(Y/N)! Is it true you are jealous of the band!”
“(Y/N), Did you sleep with lead singer Luke even with him dating Julie?”
“Are the rumors of Reggie and you true?”
I was thankful we had made it cross the sidewalk when a large bus cut them all off, giving up enough time to make it to the motel without a problem. I was thankful once we made it inside but not for long as I took the place in.
The plants in the corner were dead, the desk was dusty and the couches looked to be from the 1800′s, not the good kind.
“How many stars does this place have?”
“Uhm, 4?” Flynn voiced jumped up, saying nothing to us as she walked up and dinged the bell on the front desk. I rolled my eyes, pulling out my phone and opening it to Google.
“What are you goggling?”
“Google, and this motel,” I corrected Reggie, doing a quick search of my location and found the name of the rusty place. When I saw the rating I almost screamed.
“This place just barely has one star!”
“What,” Luke ran from the random statue he was messing with to my side, tugging the phone so he could read the reviews.
“Apparently they had a rat in a bed once,” I spoke, reading over the words in horror.
“Nope, I’ll stay on the bus,” Alex let his hands fall to his side, walking back to the door before he noticed that the camera flashes had almost doubled and no way he could make it out without a panic attack.
“Evening.”
When I heard the vile voice I jumped into Reggie's side without thinking, looking up at the older man who was looking Flynn up and down like meat.
“I need six room,” Flynn didn’t waste time, holding the credit card in between her fingers as she did her best not to be a coward.
“He looks like the witch from Hansel and Gretel,” I whispered into Reggie’s ear, ignoring the way his arm seemed to drift to my waist.
“I don’t know how that is but I agree.”
“We only have only three rooms, little lady,” the man spoke, reaching for the credit card before Flynn moved it out of reach.
“You told me on the found you had six,” Flynn bit back, I admired her confidence in this moment as everyone was slowly losing there the longer we stood in this lobby.
“The paparazzi will have fun with this,” Julie reached my side, looking over her shoulder and the few shots they could get through the windows of the dusty place.
“Got that right.”
“Fine, will bunk up,” Flynn gave up with the man, it wasn’t any use and we were all tired of setting up the stage and soundcheck today. I had spent hours hunched over the computer trying to get the mercy drop reaching tomorrow morning, my back sore and my head hurting.
The man passed Flynn the keys, after she watched him closely to make sure he didn’t charge us extra. She walked over to us, obviously annoyed but calming down the closer she got to us, she knew how to manage her anger until it was only Julie and I around.
“Julie and I will take one room, Alex and (Y/N) will take another-'' I smiled as Alex was my go-to room partner.
“-And Luke and Reggie got the last,” Flynn started handing out keys when Luke started to pout.
“Last time I slept in the same room as Reggie he talked the entire night,” Luke pointed at Reggie, causing the boy beside me to frown.
“You sleep talk? I’ve never heard it,” I shrugged and looked at Luke who was confident that “Reggie sleep talks”.
“Why can’t I take Alex and (Y/N) take Reggie?”
This felt so out of character for Luke, he never missed an opportunity to hang out with Reggie, they always bunked together. It was weird how everyone agreed, which felt even more out of character.
“Okay it’s settled,” I wanted to say something, as a night in a room alone with Reggie would be horrible for my crush, but I didn’t want Reggie to think nobody wanted to bunk with him.
Reggie shrugged, taking our key from Flynn and grabbing my go-bag I’d set on the ground of the dirty motel.
“I’ll get our bags, I know you’ll sit with Fylnn and Julie before you come up,” he didn’t sound mad or upset, he was smiling widely as he skipped to the elevator before stopping halfway through and going to the stairs instead.
“What a gentleman,” Luke winked at me, smirking between the group as if he had done something.
That’s when it hit me, he had done something.
“Oh, you liar,” I pointed my finger at Luke’s chest, my pout similar to his earlier as I looked up to someone I called a close friend, basically family.
“I did nothing of the sort, he did talk all night last time we bunked together but it was because we decided we wanted to pull an all-nighter,” Luke shrugged, looking at the other three in the loony, all smiling at me.
“You’re all vile people,” I spoke, looking to Alex who wanted to laugh so bad by the look on his face.
“And you, why would you do this to me?”
“Because I’m so tired of Reggie and you dancing around each other,” Alex gave me a stern look, making me deflate slightly but that didn’t stop me.
“We do not,” the group finally started to move again, since Reggie would already be in the room and we didn’t want him suspicious.
“Oh no, you’re the liar now,” Luke sang over my shoulder, grabbing his and Julie’s bag, Alex getting him and reaching for Flynn bag who insisted she had it.
“His hands were all over you this morning on the bus,” Julie jumped in, grabbing my shoulders and leading me through the stairway.
“He was teaching me how to play bass,” I crossed my arm, knowing this conversation wasn’t going anywhere.
“Reggie never lets anyone touch his bass!”
I rolled my eyes, they were all insane at this point.
“The reason there are so many ship edits of you guys is that you give them so much to work with,” Flynn said from the front of the group, a kick in her step about the entire idea.
“It’s because fans are crazy,” we had finally made it to the third floor, opening the door and all walking into the smelly hallways.
“It smells like a pack of cigarettes,” I almost coughed as I spoke, watching Reggie’s back open the door and slide into our room.
“You coming to sit with us?”
“No, I’m mad at you all,” I frown, but none of my friends worried as I’d forgive in the morning because they were impossible to stay mad at.
“Suit yourself, also he didn’t have any two bedrooms so have fun sharing a bed,” Flynn gave me a sweet kiss on the cheek and skipped to her and Julie’s room.
“I’ll kill you,” I yelled at Flynn as she walked into her room, Julie giving a sweet waver over her shoulder.
“I wonder if they have a mini-fridge,” Luke spoke, opening the door as the two boys gave me an exciting wave as if they weren’t making my life harder.
“(Y/N)? Why are you yelling?”
I looked down a door or two to see Reggie leaning against the doorframe of our room with a white tee and black and red plaid pajama pants.
He was going to be the death of me.
“Uhm, Fylnn told me they didn’t have a breakfast bar,” I did my best to lie, smiling as I made my way to the door Reggie leaned against, his little smile made me feel light and fluffy.
“I’ll get us one of the Ubers to take us to that little diner on the corner,” Reggie smiled, not moving from the doorframe once I reached it.
I didn’t want to slide past him but I did, doing my best not to come in contact with him as that may just make it worse but luckily he moved back so that didn’t happen.
“Thank god, I like the layout of it.”
I saw the single Queen bed in the center of my room and my heart broke as I thought about Fylnn’s words, she wasn’t just trying to get under my skin.
“Yeah, I know you love dinners that look like they are from the 50s.”
My heart shouldn’t have been on fire because of his words but it 100% was. He remembered those little quirks and it started to make me feel light-headed.
“Yeah they’re my favorite,” I smiled over my shoulder, reaching for my bag I had packed for the night in the motel, luckily bought my sleep stuff and asleep attire.
“There was one by my house back in the 90s, it was right out of that movie you had me watched,” Reggie fell back on the left side, leaving the right side open for me.
He knew what freaking side of the bed I slept on, I was going to combust.
“Grease,” I ignored the way his arms bulged as he laid them behind his hand, looking up at me as I looked through my bag for a few more things.
“Yeah that one, I think I should do my hair like David-“
“Danny,” I corrected as I made my way to the bathroom, leaving the door cracked so I could keep the conversation but still closed enough so I wasn’t worried about Reggie seeing me.
“Oh yeah, I should do my hair like him.” I smiled to myself, imagining Reggie dancing around as a Danny from Grease, the excitement he would have.
I tried not to think about how hot he’d look with his hair slick back.
“Do it for Halloween next year,” I spoke up, splashing water on my face to make me feel a little calmer.
“But I thought we would do a matching costume?”
I was going to scream and cry if he didn’t stop acting like the perfect boy. How do you lie because Reggie Freaking Peters and not fall in love with him?
“You could be Sandy!”
I felt myself smile again, looking down at the short and long shirt I had stolen from Alex that sat on top of the toilet.
“You can have red lipstick and those leather pants,” he sounded like a child that was just given candy, he was jumping just at the thought of the costume together.
“The fans would love it,” maybe it wasn’t the best idea to bring them up, but I couldn’t stop myself from saying it.
“They would! They’d probably talk about how cool you look for months,” I finally got the shirt over my head, looking at myself in the mirror, my nerves calming the longer the conversation went on.
Reggie wouldn’t make this awkward on purpose, I knew that.
“Yeah, but they’d like us matching. They wouldn’t let the dating rumor die though”, I stepped out from the bathroom, careful not to hit the creaking floorboard I found earlier.
“Oh, I didn’t think about that,” I watched his face fall and maybe my heart broke a little, but it was probably better. If it didn’t I would have possibly let this crush grow more and more and I didn’t need that.
“Eh, I don’t really care what the fans think.”
Heart please don’t explode, you have a merch drop tomorrow.
“Must be nice,” I fell back on the bed, laying the same way as Reggie as we looked at the ceiling that could probably fall in any second now.
“Why do you care?”
I watched him flip on his stomach out of the corner of my eye, him watching me but my eyes didn’t leave the ceiling.
“They just like making rumors with people that aren’t in the band sometimes more than the ones in the band. You four are more open than Flynn and I so they can only make so many rumors, but Flynn and I,” I trailed off, not knowing if he wanted this conversation to get too emotional.
“Yeah I noticed that, I mean you're cheating with Luke!”
I laughed at this tone, that definitely was a real crazy one that just started.
“I literally hit him in the head with the mic stand yesterday and kept walking and people think we’re dating”, I laugh at the afterthought, Luke's face when the mic stand went by his face. He was fine, but I didn’t have time to help him up and he understood that.
“That was great to watch, I haven’t seen Luke that confused since we landed here,” I spotted his show stopping smile in the corner of my eye.
“He’s a mess that’s why.”
“All three of us are a mess, without you, Julie, and Flynn we would be dead.”
“You’re already dead,” I tried to keep a straight face but as soon as I looked at Reggie my giggles filled the room, a hand on my stomach as I rolled over slightly.
“You’re horrible! You’re laughing at my death!”
I kept laughing, looking over at him a few times but it only caused me to laugh harder.
“I can’t believe I was excited to have a sleepover with you,” he had a goofy smile on his face as he watched me roll around.
“You 're excited,” I was finally calming down, trying to blame my racing heart on laughing.
“Yeah!”
He was so confident in his answer it felt like he meant it, like he wasn’t just being nice or just happy to be close with his friend.
Reggie liked being with people, he was a people person, and I was a person.
“I was excited too.”
Wow (Y/N) don’t you love your loud mouth.
He looked around my face, his eyes tracing my features with a smile painted across his face. I was shocked someone could be so happy like looked at me, but he did and it felt nice.
It was creepy or uncomfortable, nothing with Reggie ever was. He made everything feel easy, and maybe that’s why he has plagued my thoughts for so long.
“We should head to bed,” I could speak above a whisper with the way he was looking at me, the way his eyes traced my nose and my eyes.
“Yeah.”
We didn’t move, just watching each other as if it was supposed to be sleep for us. I wasn’t tired watching him like this, how could I be tired when he made me feel more alive than ever.
The loud knock on the door brought me out of my trace, my fear of what could be at the door had me moving closer to Reggie without thinking.
I felt the side of the move, Reggie slowly walking to the moldy wooden door with the small peep hole, or more like someone put a nail though and took it out.
He looked through it, reading to each for the candlestick before he rolled his eyes and swung open the door. Alex stood with an awkward smile, doing an odd dance before smiling at Reggie and I.
“Alex?”
“Can I use your bathroom?” I finally realized why he was dancing and smiled to himself.
“Sure but why?”
As soon as he heard my yes he pushed past Reggie, running into the thin wall bathroom without an answer until I heard him yell “Yes!”
“Our bathroom had some weird bug in the toilet and Julie and Flynn’s bathroom was connected to some weird old dude who fell asleep on the toilet,” Alex responded through the door, the excitement obviously in his voice.
“Looks like I got the good room,” Reggie smiled but I was hoping Alex would catch on to my comment and by the way he laughed I think he did.
“Shut up (Y/N)!”
Reggie knocked on the door jokingly as he passed, making his way back to the other side of the bed.
“How did Julie and Flynn get a conjoining room?”
“I don’t know and I don’t want to,” Alex yelled back, the sound of running water confirmed he was now washing his hands.
“You don’t have paper towels,” Alex opens the door, holding his hands in front of him as he looks like a kicked puppy.
“Use your shirt,” Reggie nodded at him, both him and I on our side as we watched Alex.
“It’s not mine! It’s Willie’s.”
“We won’t tell if you don’t,” I smiled back, giving Alex a wink.
“I accidentally told him,” Alex muttered as he started walking to the door, waving back at us and he left to go back to his own room.
As soon as the door shut I let myself laugh a little at my close friend, slowly reaching for the lamp and lifting the covers up. I could feel Reggie doing the same as the cold air hitting my skin when it moved and disappearing once it fell.
“Must I say, this motel isn’t that bad.”
I turned to look back at Reggie, the only reason I could see his face was because of the city lights from the window that danced across his face.
“What?”
“Don’t get me wrong, this place breaks every violation ever, but I think places like this bring out the best stories,” Reggie moved to look at me, his nose close to my own and he smiled at me.
I smiled, it was truly the Reggie-ish thing I had ever heard.
“I believe that,” I spoke softly, watching him again but this time the tension was thick, it felt so much calmer.
“Julie and Flynn will never forget the creepy guy, Alex and Luke will laugh about Alex blatter, and I’ll never forget the best sleepover ever,” each word brought a little larger smile on his face, my heart racing again at his words.
“I mean that much to you?” I said the words jokingly, placing a hand over my heart as I spoke but Reggie took it differently.
“Most definitely,” his words are soft, making my eyes grow tired as his breath fan across my face.
He was watching me again, this time he looked like an angel with the way the city light bounced off his cheeks and bought out his pink lips.
“Yeah?”
“Yep,” his face looked like it was moving closer to me but I knew better than to think that, but that didn’t crush that little hope in the back of my head.
“If you were there in the 90s, I’d probably still be alive,” eye contact was made and I thought I would jump him there.
“I wasn’t alive then.”
“I know, but you’re alive now and I feel alive,” Reggie shrugged as if his words didn’t mean everything to me.
Like he didn’t mean everything to me. I felt myself break eye contact, smiling like a fool as I looked to the tv that was barely hanging on the wall.
“You’re cold,” I spoke softly, because what else was I supposed to say?
“You’re warm,” as he spoke he grew closer to me, resting his head near my collarbone as he waited for me to speak but it never came.
“Can I lay my head on your shoulder?”
“Most definitely,” I repeated his rooms from earlier, smiling when I felt his hair brush my cheek and he drew close to me.
“Goodnight (Y/N),” he spoke softly, his words causing shivers to run up and down my spine like a track race.
“Goodnight Reggie.”
A loud bang on the door woke me up, causing me to almost fall from the bed if the hand that grabbed my shirt wasn't a tiger. His arms weren’t around me, simply holding me closer by my shirt, his head still on my shoulder as my head laid on his.
“Flynn has coffee!” Julie’s voice was joyus, making a smile spread across my lips. My friends knew me so well, my hands gently pulling Reggie’s fist from my shirt. I carefully pulled myself from the bed, tip-toeing across the room to the door. I didn’t even need to look through the peephole to know who was on the other side.
“Did you get a cup for your neighbor?”
Flynn smiled, dropped, and the coffee she held out to me was brought closer to her chest.
“And to think I gave you a kiss yesterday,” I rolled my eyes, reaching out for the coffee that was easy to pull from her hands.
“Luke and Alex are stealing breakfast from the hotel we were supposed to be staying at,” Julie brushed past me, stopping in her tracks when she noticed Reggie's sleeping body, obviously splashing on both sides of the bed.
“How are they doing that?”
“I don't wanna know, but I do wanna know what happened here last night,” Julie spun around, pointing at Reggie over her shoulder.
“We talked and went to bed,” I shrugged, doing my best to keep my voice down but it wouldn’t change anything, Reggie was a heavy sleeper.
“I thought you would make a plate on the floor or something,” Flynn spoke as she joined us in the room, slowly walking to Reggie and inspecting him.
“That felt rude,” I sipped on the coffee, smiling when I realized Julie and Flynn got my order right.
“Or,” Julie turned around, poking my side with a goofy smile. I rolled my eyes, my excitement from last night and the presents of my friends was sending me through the roof and I don’t think I could handle it much longer.
“Guys!”
I looked down the hall, smiling when I saw Alex and Luke breathing heavily with large bags of hopeful food in their hands.
“Is that from the hotel?”
“Of course,” Luke smiled as he slipped into the room, handing me one of the bags so I could place it on the small table in the motel.
“We got chased out but we did it!”
I laughed at Alex's face, the anxiety was obvious but the smile told me he was fine and there wasn’t much to worry about.
“Well well well,” Luke walked around the bed, smiling at Reggie’s sleeping form.
“Don’t say a word,” I opened one of the bags and pulled a small piece of pancake off, and threw it in the air, catching it in my mouth easily. Perks of being friends with Luke, he teaches great party tricks.
“Aren’t you two the cutest,” Luke came over to my side, waving Julie over to show me something on her phone. I looked over my shoulder, watching a new edit that was posted maybe an hour ago.
“Reggie and (Y/N) were seen awfully close leaving their hotel last night,” the E! News reporter said, the edit jumping to a meme I had seen of a dude crying. Next thing I knew pictures from last night flash across the screen, Reggie’s hand on my lower back. The edit jumped to other pictures of us joking around followed.
I smiled, turning back to the bag and pulling another piece of pancake out.
“Awh look at that,” Flynn pitched my cheeks, smiling at my as I laughed it off. Butterflies were flying through my stomach but I didn my best to hide it.
“What?”
Everyone turned to Reggie once sleeping form, his eyes scanning the room before he fell back to the bed.
“Did anyone knock?”
“We did,” Julie smiled, flopping on the bed so her head laid on his legs.
“I wasn’t informed,” Reggie sat up, looking at me with a grumpy frown. I shrugged, taking another bite of pancake while smiling at him.
“What? You wanted me to wake you?”
“Most definitely,” Reggie smiled, the conversation from last night still floating around his brain.
I nodded, looking down at my hands and thought back to the late night we had with nothing but calming security.
He was right, crappy motels brought the best memories out in people.

#reggie x y/n#reggie peters x reader#japt reggie#reggie peters#reggie tag#julie and the phantoms x reader#jatp x reader
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