#if it gets worse go see a doctor
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bee please help I accidentally ate mold /gen
my stomach feels weird :(
my hot pink limbo doesn't have a ‘remove mold from body’ button either :(((
any advice?
- đŸ«šanon
WHAT THE FUCK. WHATTTT HELPPP????
BRO WHAT RHE FUCK đŸ«š ANON??? I HAVEN'T GOTTEN THIS FAR INTO MY MEDICAL CLASS PLEASE I FONT KNOW YET
UHHHHH okay if it gets like worse, and your stomach is just like absolutely jumping you and nothing else works like medicine and stuff then go see a doctor, but if it gets like way way worse then go to the hospital because that isn't good and it's really bad for your health, but you should be fine depending on the mold and if it wasn't that big but still you'd most likely get sick, black mold Is an instant no no go to hospital if you've consumed it, anything else still if you are having like full on pain in your stomach,
For me I ate a little bit of mold on cheese that I did not know had mold so it was wild but I didn't get sick, but still please be careful eating food and make sure it has no mold or anything, don't eat mold, how the hell did you eat mold, what happened, still, if it gets you really sick go to the doctor and take a lot of medicine and get rest, that isn't good for you, even if it's a different color mold still, if your stomach gets a lot of pain and sharp pain go see a doctor immediately, that is not good and your body isn't supposed to feel that at all.
Don't eat mold guys.
Please let me know if you'll be fine later on, please be okay Jesus don't eat mold or anything with mold it's ok if you didn't see it but be careful next time oh my goddd
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crystalflygeo · 8 months ago
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Last of her kind Emperor!Alpha!Zhongli + Omega!Dragoness!Reader
cw/tags: Your usual mentions of slavery and sexual themes, A/B/O dynamics and heat mentions. Also allusions to depression and mentions of death.
notes: Aahahaha this took forever..... allow me top explain: first of all my new job is killing me and second of all I'm going through a hard period where I don't really like anything I write anymore. This work in particularly I kept struggling with the pacing, the dialogues, the way I wanted feelings to come across or scenes to flow it's just hhhnnnggg. I told a couple of friends that I set the bar so high with the first part I feel like nothing else I write will be that good. Then the second part was "ok" but cut off in a cliffhanger and has been there for SO LONG that now I feel this will be underwhelming after all the buildup//hit
I hope it's not. I hope it's good.
Anyway this part is in Zhongli's pov and contains flashbacks which will be fully in italics! Enjoy! and thanks for caring so much about this story ;w; ILU all <3
<- Part 2.
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Your instincts mess up with your head.
Your crying and anxiety have simmered to a cold numbness.
Hours blur together, time loses meaning.
The doctor comes by sometimes. The maids bring you food. But everything feels
 off, distant.
This doesn’t feel
 like your usual heats.
You curl up and sob, a choked soft noise.
You don’t feel hot, but rather cold. Limbs weak. Dizzy.
Your heart aches.
You’re so tired.
And so sleepy

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Zhongli puts down the seal stamp and deflates back into his chair with a sigh, he must have read the same line at least five times already. He cannot concentrate at all. It’s not even been three days and each hour, each minute, feels eternal.
He’s already gotten so used to your presence, so smitten with you and your little quirks, your rare smiles, the way your ears and tail flicker, your pretty eyes

And he remembers those same eyes begging for him, teary. Your pitiful cry. Your distressed scent.
Guilt eats at him. As well as something else

He’s been restless, barely slept. Your scent is a siren’s song on the blankets, tart and fresh and tantalizing, but you are not with him. Anxious energy flows in his veins. This emotion, this thing that is like regret and sorrow and fear all tangled together, cleaves him through. His instincts are screaming at him, rattling inside a cage of his own making. His mate, his precious Omega is in heat, you’re scared and lonely and need him. Zhongli has to suppress a growl and feel the shudder of his scales at the fact that he’s not with you. In your nest. Taking care of you.
It’s agonizing.
"How is she?"
The same question, over and over, at any chance he gets.
"She refuses to eat, your majesty." Xiao tells him, and he can feel the concern in the younger Alpha’s voice. “According to the maids she only took a few bites of the ajilenak nuts, the rest of the food was left untouched.”


"She's um... she's always sleeping when I go check up on her." Ganyu explains a little crestfallen. She too is worried. “A-at least I think she’s in no pain
 she was clinging to one of your hanfus.”


"You should go see her, Zhongli." Ping states, a rare serious expression on her usual gentle factions. “Baizhu says she’s going through the worst case of separation sickness he’s ever seen. Is that really what you want your poor Yin to go through?”
He lets out a frustrated rumble.
“Of course not. But it’s for the best, I don’t want to
 take advantage of her, or force her to anything.” Zhongli frowns, trying to focus on the papers in front of him again, in an attempt to ignore her piercing gaze.
“Is it really any of that if she wants her mate?” Ping retorts. “She was begging you.”
I know.
He growls this time, and shakes his head at his memory of you. It haunts him.
“She doesn’t know what she wants.”
“So, you’re deciding for her then? Is that it? Honestly, are you listening to yourse-”
“She’s been conditioned to serve.” He cuts her off, voice grave and somber. “Trained to be submissive and please. She likes me simply because I’m kind to her, she wants me because she thinks it’s her obligation as my mate. I feel the pull of the bond too, the need, the yearning. But I also know she is afraid of Alphas and she thinks
 she thinks she has to obey me. That she owes me something or that own her.” His eyes narrow. “I didn’t need to bond her. I shouldn’t have bonded her. I just
 wanted her to be free and instead I chained her to me. And now she’s in heat
”
And it drives him insane.
“Listen to me, we’ve both spent time with her, enough to know she’s opening up and learning to voice her feelings
” Ping reasons gently. “It’s a slow process, don’t hurt her this way. At the very least
 go see her.”
“I lost control once with just one kiss from her. I will not do it again. I will not harm her any further.”
The elderly woman keeps silent for a few moments. Zhongli sighs and rests his forehead in his palm in defeat.
And then Ganyu approaches, a little tense, a stack of papers in her hands.
“Your majesty, the Qixing are starting to arrive, council meeting will begin soon.”
“Very well. Thank you Ganyu.” He stands up and nods at her, then turns to Ping and his demeanor softens a little. “You know I just want to correct my mistakes, and give her the life she deserves. At least a fraction of it, of happiness.”
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It wasn’t supposed to go this way
 Zhongli sighed as he walked up to the room where the “reunion” with the sumerian would take place. It was long overdue seeing as he had spent the night by your side, refusing to leave after you had cried and begged so desperately

After he had bonded you.
He had initially taken the eremite’s claims with a grain of salt, but naturally he had to make sure. The last dragonblood had supposedly died decades ago, so how
?
And yet when he saw you for the first time in that room, he knew.
You were real, you were beautiful. Suddenly he felt a million things at once: He wanted to get to know you, stay close to you, protect you. Old draconic instinct vibrating excitedly on his soul. You smelled vaguely familiar, your tail was gorgeous, your ears adorable. What if you didn’t like him though? What if he harmed you? Scared you? Suddenly he was nervous, nervous of ruining this, nervous in a way he hadn’t been in so long, like when he’d been young and Liyue had been at war and he had lost everything to fire and smoke and dust and he had to make difficult decisions and-
He had always calculated his moves. No room for risks. Too much at stake.
But you, you disarmed him. Completely.
You, with your polite gentleness despite the obvious cracks beneath the surface.
You, with your beautiful looks and enormous potential, even if you didn’t see it yourself.
You, with that look of yearning and hope, with your soft lips and sweet moans, with your warm body fitting perfectly against his.
For once, he allowed himself to make a decision with his heart, not logic, not politics. Just instincts.
And he claimed you



He enters the room. A couple Millelith soldiers stationed by the door, Xiao standing by his side loyally as he sits at his place of honor as the emperor. Your ‘master’, an Alpha eremite named Zaheer, kneels respectfully a little below.
“I see you liked her, your majesty” He offers a sly smirk. “Did she satisfy you properly? She’s been trained on her gag reflexes to-”
Zhongli -Morax- resists the urge to growl. “We are not here to discuss that.”
“Ah, of course, business!”
Business.
“Since she’s such an exotic and well-trained slave I suppose we could agree on
”
“Do you think of me an idiot, Zaheer?” Morax’s eyes narrow.
“P-Pardon me?”
“She is a pureblood xiānshĂČu. I want to know exactly how she ended up being enslaved by you and your people.”
Cold and calculating golden eyes stare down at the eremite.
“W-What
 she’s desert-born!” Zaheer retorts back angrily “She was born at a heat house. Maybe she has traits from your people because one of them decided to get a cheap fuck while traveling.”
“You expect me to believe that?” Morax asks unfazed “Liyue has records of the last of her kind disappearing and presumably being murdered when a village near Sumeru borders was razed to the ground. Do you have a disclosure?”
Zaheer stands up and growls, clearly an Alpha not used to having to bow his head and accept things not going his way.
Clearly an Alpha used to intimidating and attacking others.
Xiao wields his spear and changes his stance to an offensive one. The Millelith guards also tense.
Zaheer gets even more irritated, feeling like a caged animal. Backed into a corner. “Emperor or not” He starts through gritted teeth. “If you’re not going to pay me then I’ll take my merchandise back and do business elsewhere where I’m not being accused of ridiculous claims.”
“You’re right that I won’t be doing any business with you, but we’ll see how ridiculous those claims truly are. Zaheer, by my word as the emperor you will now remain detained in Liyue.” Morax sentences.
The eremite’s red eyes widen in shock and rage and the desert-dweller shoots up to attack Morax, getting easily overpowered and neutralized by Xiao’s quick moves. In seconds his weapon drops to the floor as the Yaksha general points his spear at the unconscious man. The Millelith quickly retrieve him and the blade before Morax simply nods at them.
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Months. It had been months since then and he had to begrudgingly release the man as no accusation connected him to anything. They were essentially out of leads. There did appear to be documentation of your birth at a desert village but Zhongli would be hard pressed to believe the half-assed story you’ve been told

And since you are pureblood, then both of your parents, and most importantly your dam, was also a dragonblood. That’s at the very least one Liyue citizen enslaved in a foreign nation.
He would get to the bottom of this.
For now, however, he had to cast those worries aside.
The Seven members of the council sit around the large table, the Liyue Qixing, leaders of all the commerce and trade sectors of the nation.
Zhongli takes his place at the head of the table. Ganyu does so as well by the sideline.
“Very well, what’s our first topic today?”
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“Did Master just
 leave?”
There was silence at the table, Zhongli and Ping sit frozen and you get just a bit nervous.
It’d been a few days since you started your new life, and though Zhongli was sure you were warming up to it he knew you still had a long way to go. It was probably still a little surreal for you
 such a big change from everything you knew.
The tension on his shoulders quickly drops again. He continues eating. “Yes.” He says simply. Ping follows his lead, saying nothing.
The faster you forget about that eremite, the better.
“Hm
” You continue eating as well. Your expression is a little conflicted

You inhale.
“Was he
 happy
 that I finally found a mate?”
Zhongli turns to you sharply and tenses again like a cat bristling. He holds back his tongue so as to not say something he’d regret. Why do you still care about that despicable man’s opinion? Why do you still seek his approval? Did you really think he cared about you? Zhongli desperately wants to make you understand how that slave-owner only saw you as an object, how he fed you lies, how his mistreatment is inexcusable

But he can only imagine how deep your scars run, and how that toxic mindset has settled and accompanied you for years. He cannot judge you for caring about someone who doesn’t deserve it.
“Why do you ask, dear?” Ping asks instead.
“I don’t know
” You mumble, poking at the congee with your spoon. “I always wanted to make him proud.”
Proud.
Him?
“I think what matters most is how you feel.” Zhongli says, his hand reaching out for yours invitingly and you place your fingers on his palm, getting a soft reassuring squeeze. “You don’t need to rely on how others view you or think about you.”
You seem thoughtful for a second, your ears flickering back insecure but then standing up alert again. “I am happy” You admit. “Very happy. I have the best mate in the world.” You smile brightly.
Zhongli’s heart does a flip.
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“With the excessive rains in the northern villages, there have been many floods and a lot of crops have been severely damaged or lost. Our previous contingency plan is in action already and donations are being sent to help the affected families. However, we must prepare for a decline in the harvest of certain grains and vegetables this season, as well as an increase in prices for a few months due to the shift in demand and supply.” Keqing explains expertly, the young alpha’s expression is serious and solemn.
“It’s an opportunity to strengthen commerce with Mondstadt and Sumeru.” Ningguang chimes in, leaning back on her chair, arms crossed. “The value of jade and other crystals is on the rise as well.”
“Not to mention, we’ll be employing several architects from the Akademiya to help with the rebuilding.” Keqing adds, turning to Ganyu, who nods.
“Greater lord Rukkhadevata and lesser Lord Kusanali have agreed on a certain exchange program with Liyue. I started drafting up some proposals already if you’d like to see.” The blue-haired secretary passes along some documents.
Ningguang’s eyes skim along the page. “It’s almost like our new Sumeru-born empress was a sign.” She smirks. “By the way, where is she?” She turns to Zhongli, curious about her fellow Omega.
“She’s rather indisposed at the moment.” The emperor replies dryly, not wanting to delve much onto the touchy subject. “Ganyu this looks good, however we need to think about-”
There is a knock that quickly surprises everyone. Who could interrupt a council meeting and why?
Baizhu peeks in with Changsheng curled around his neck, a frown on his usually gentle features. “Your majesty, a word. It’s an emergency.”
All the members at the table stare silently as Zhongli stands and follows the doctor.
Ganyu has a bad feeling

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“We have no time, follow me.” The green-haired doctor walks briskly along the wooden corridors, he looks
 frustrated, dejected.
“What’s wrong?”
He doesn’t want to panic. He never panics. But something inside him does. It’s obvious that this has to do with you. 
“I apologize, your majesty. I thought it was just a case of separation sickness but
 the empress is showing signs of widow’s wasting.”
Zhongli stops.
His heart skips a beat. His skin prickles with dread.
“She’s
 dying?”
Baizhu shakes his head. “It hasn’t reached that point yet, but
 she’s deteriorating.”
The guilt is back. The fear.
“Given what happened, I’m pretty certain the shock of your rejection was the trigger. Still, it is highly unusual for a Yin to suffer from widow’s wasting without their partner actually dying, even more so for it to settle so quickly. Her reaction is akin to someone who had never left their mate’s side for years.” Baizhu explains.
You trusted him.
And he turned his back on you.
What have I done?
“In any casssse, it’ssss not too late.” Changsheng’s little voice pipes in. Baizhu keeps leading the way and Zhongli follows, though he obviously knows the entire palace like the palm of his hand, at the moment his thoughts are scattered and far far away.
“She needs her mate’s reassurance. I have done what I can with medicine but this is a bonded pair matter.” Finally, he stops at a juncture and turns to Zhongli. “Please, your majesty, only you can save her. I will tell Ganyu, Xiao and Ping of the situation, and if you need anything, just ask.”
Zhongli nods, mute.
The snake narrows her eyes. “Don’t leave her sssside.”
“Changsheng.” Baizhu shushes.
She is right to chastise him. He deserves that and more.
“I won’t.” Zhongli nods and heads down the hall.
Widow’s wasting.
The words echo in his head. He’s seen the damage it can do. How a broken bond, the loss of the most important person, can destroy someone inside. Did you really care that much about him? Did he really hurt you that badly?
“Please
”
He didn’t mean to.
“I have the best mate in the world.”
He feels like a monster.
“I want to stay with you. Sleep together. Like mates.”
He needs to see you. He needs to make sure you’re ok

He stands in front of the nest room. The same one where he first met you.
Opening the doors only slightly to slip inside, Zhongli's eyes widen and a hand flies to cover his nose and mouth when a strong smell shakes him to his very core.
The room he expected to be completely saturated with intense heat pheromones
 instead bears the acrid scent of despair.
This isn’t the lustful call to breed and have children that made an omega vulnerable and pliant. No. It is a desperate cry from a heartbroken omega for their mate to come back, to stay with them, to love and protect them. It is grief.
You are suffering because of him.
To think all this time
 he was afraid he'd make you uncomfortable. That he’d scare you, hurt you, ruin the bond you’ve carefully built. Instead, he is overcome by an all-consuming terror. Every part of him screaming at his mate's weak essence.
And there you are, his precious treasure, his sweet dragoness.
You lay curling in on yourself letting out small muffled sobs.
“Y/n
” 
No reaction.
“Darling, my dear dragoness
” He rushes up to you immediately, grabs your hand and pets your hair. You look so weak, your skin is feverish, how has it only been three days? It feels like a lifetime

You shift a little and your eyes blink open, staring at him dazed, red and puffy and your expression defeated. You let out a pitiful whine and more of that bitter sad scent is released. 
“No my dear, don’t cry, I’m here. I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.” Zhongli coos as he curls up to you, frantically starting to scent and nip at your neck and shoulders affectionately. His horns manifest and his tail follows through, lashing about a little restless. The bond
 feels wrong, broken. He should be able to intimately feel you this close and yet

He tries to reposition you a little so you can lie on top of him, rest on his chest. It’s concerning how easily he can do so, you’re like a ragdoll in his arms, unresponsive and unmoving. His hands cup your face, thumbs rubbing at the traces of tears in your cheeks. You let out a frustrated whimper. “Shhhh shh it’s okay. I’m so sorry.”
Even if he says it a million times, it won’t feel enough.
Zhongli nuzzles at your neck and proceeds to do something he hasn’t done since he was practically a teen. He purrs. It’s a little rusty, comes off more as a grumbling but it seems to work as he feels you relax just slightly in his arms.
“I’m right here” Zhongli’s deep voice assures you, tugging you closer, mouthing at the soft skin along your collarbone. “I’m not going anywhere and I’m all yours, I promise, I promise. I won’t leave you alone, not ever.” He soothes.
He lowers a bit of your clothes at the shoulder and grazes his fangs along your faded mark, you tense and let out a long shaky breath.
“Everything will be ok.” He kisses the spot. “I’m sorry.”
And then he sinks his fangs in to reestablish the claim.
You cry out in pain and squirm, clawing at his clothes, but he holds you, his hand rubbing circles at your back, his tail intertwining with yours.
...
.....
...
At first nothing changes, but after a few moments
 a low strained purr bubbles up from within you again.
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tj-crochets · 4 months ago
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Hey y'all! Weird question time, not really a medical question, more a question about doctors office response times? Below a read more in case you want to skip it:
So, last week I may or may not have passed out*, in a way different to the times I may or may not (almost definitely have) passed out before, because this time my blood pressure was not low and my heart rate was not high. I am someone with a long history of cardiac-adjacent issues, endocrine and/or brain related issues, and neurological issues**. I called my primary care doctor early afternoon on Wednesday and did not hear back from his office until after 5pm on Thursday, though the very helpful nurse I spoke to at the front desk squeezed me in for an appointment with a different doc at the same location on Thursday morning. I called my neurologist at the same time Wednesday, and I did not hear back from their office until today, the following Monday. They also were not calling to schedule an appointment. They were calling to see if I'd gotten my referral to an ENT that they send in five months ago, and mentioned they'd gotten my message that I'd "had an incident". I had to get transferred to someone else and say "I saw my primary care doctor already because you did not return my messages and I'd passed out. He did some bloodwork that all turned up normal and told me to talk to my neurologist" before they even considered getting me an appointment (which they did not do! They said they'd call me back tomorrow!) The question: Is that an unreasonable response time? It feels like an unreasonable response time to me, from both my PCP and my neurologist, honestly. Like, the nurse at the PCP's facility got me in to see another doctor, but my PCP didn't know and didn't respond for over a day, and my neurologist took five days and wouldn't schedule an appointment. I suspect the combo of past history of heart and neurological issues and passing out for the first time in years should be the sort of thing that rings alarm bells, right? *when I felt like I was going to fall down if I did not immediately lie down, I chose to lie down and had my eyes closed while lying down and I think I lost time? hard to tell though **I have tachycardia but it's never ever out of rhythm, so technically I don't have heart issues? The tachycardia tends to alarm new doctors though, like I get an express pass to an EKG immediately at the ER. The endocrine and/or brain issue is the salt wasting syndrome. Might be endocrine! Might be brain damage! Hard to tell! Thought it was endocrine for a long time but there's overlap. The neurological issues are migraines and brain fog.
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roguemonsterfucker · 3 months ago
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I'm feeling so sick today. my symptoms are so much worse.
at least i'm able to write this story a bit before i die
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tearfest · 3 months ago
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sorry to log on n rant but i need to rant
#tbd.#ooc.#cw complaining#ignore the tags if u dont want to see how my life is going shdfhsf#so im doing my masters yeah#and im like. 75% thru#shouldve been done last month#but bc of the year ive had my uni adviser was rlly nice and sorted a way to extend my student status for another year#to get my dissertation done#like i did my 4 essays n now its just dissertation time#n i was supposed to start it now n get booked in with my mentor n stuff but i cant fucking log into the website#bc u need a MFA#and the MFA app my uni uses wont acknowledge me bc i have a different phone bc my phone broke#and a different number bc my phone contract got cut off#so idk what to do lol i cant log in and do anything#ive rang the IT desk for help 59w9er3424234 times#and everytime i get thru to the actual line n im taken off hold .. they hang up on me#idk if its a system error or my phone bc its a shit old one#but i cant do anything#and my universal credit claim got closed#non uk oomfs its a benefits system#n they help u with money to pay bills whether ur looking for work or unfit to work which is what my doctor said i am bc#my mental health and physical health combines to make me a super loser#n he thinks i might try to K word myself if i take too much on at once after eveerything#like i cant even sit and grieve my dad that died not even 6 months ago yet because i have to much shit to fucking do#like i cant afford to liven now#i cant pay my bills. they keep bouncing and coming back worse#i have debt collectors coming @ me#i am stuck in catch 22 man like not even my support workers can help me rn#and im very lucky that i own my own home bc of my car accident when i was 15 lol but everyone is just telling me to sell it
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jennifersbod · 6 months ago
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either making the best or worst decision of my life rn
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trafficpan-ic · 7 months ago
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don't take my pain medication for 1 day and can't handle it
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hoiburto · 6 days ago
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yeah so can medical professionals take a moment to gauge whether the patient will be happy about nothing coming up on results before they deliver it like happy news
like yes I'm sure I should be glad there's nothing on the scan, or the blood test, unfortunately this means that my chronic debilitating pain is still unexplained! so thanks but I actually am going to burst into tears right now đŸ’„
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monster-noises · 10 days ago
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AaHHHHGHHH got some mail today that i forgot i was waiting on from the local health sugar to help me with my blood sugar stuff
And they fucking just.. assigned me an appointment date with no input from me so of course it's in the middle of a fucking work day and i have no time off left to spend on yaking the day off, and it's late enough in the morning that i can't reaaaally scootch my schedule down..
And like maybe i could find a way to finagle a sick day in there but Apparently
I need Literally All Of Those those to cover my first week off after surgery
Because insurance through work comes in a week After you start your leave, because that's when they approve it (this whole coverage thing is making me so steaming boiling mad regardless, this is just shiny deep red cherry on top of the fucking cake i sweaR TO G O D)
So I don't really want to Do that and loose more pay somewhere else
So now I don't know what to fucking do because i Work when the Doctors Offices are Open (just like.. all of them. In general.) so i can't really reschedule, but cancelling may be a bad idea because i probably won't get to go back until after surgery, if i don't have to go back through the application process to see this doctor anyway.
I'm going to start throwing things and having a breakdown I try to actually start looking after my health and I end up in this situation it's disgusting i'm so pissed off.
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iridikron · 3 months ago
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psych evaluation the 31st like at least its this month. i fucking guess
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disengaged · 9 months ago
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alright anorexia is boring, let’s get yolked
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danielnelsen · 10 months ago
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there’s so much i wanna do this week/month/etc but i’m just too sick, i have no energy, i can’t sleep, i’m constantly nauseous and headachey and on the verge of a migraine, i’m stressed and irritable and impatient and panicky

.how tf did i survive nearly 5 years of high school untreated if i can’t even manage this when i don’t have any major obligations rn
#at least i finally got my meds so hopefully i feel a little better soon#although i’m now on 20 pills per day which is Just Great#whenever i’m in remission it’s nice to just. forget sometimes that this can happen at any time#kinda wish i had the typical kinda chronic illness that people talk about with ‘flares’#or at least triggers that i can plan around#the other times have all had an easily identifiable stressor tho tbf. idk what caused this one#the first time was whooping cough and the next few were all very major life stressors like my cat dying right after i started uni#and i think also towards the end of my honours thesis?#but this

.there’s no major stress right now. nothing wildly beyond normal#i’m a little concerned about my joints tho. they’ve been so much worse than normal the last few months#so i’m kinda worried i’m developing rheumatoid arthritis (also an autoimmune disease and it runs in the family specifically)#so if that’s happening then it could set my thyroid off? probably should get to the doctor at some point#obv i’m seeing my endo for thyroid stuff. but i should see my gp and get her to run all the autoimmune blood tests again#i’ve done that before but it’s been a few years and my ankles and knees are so painful i can’t even walk properly a lot of the time#BUT I JUST WANNA DO THINGS I ENJOY AND I CANT AND I WILL CONTINUE TO COMPLAIN ABOUT IT#‘oh you’re so lucky you don’t have as many obligations because you’re chronically ill’ ha ha ha please swap lives with me immediately#personal#but seriously. i wasn’t diagnosed until i was nearly 17 and we can trace it back to whooping cough when i was 12#so it was the last half of year 6 and then all of years 7-10 and the start of year 11 of just being. uh. ‘very lazy and complaining a lot’#and TEACHERS joking about me and my sister (who was dealing with an arguably more severe undiagnosed disease) missing so many classes#wow so funny pdhpe teacher who’s supposed to be teaching is about health#and the thing with being a mentally ill teenager is that hyperthyroidism can just look like a very severe anxiety disorder#so i didn’t go to the dr until i was too sick to go to school at all. and luckily had a good dr who did a blood test#i’m just rambling now because i can’t sleep and i don’t wanna lie here doing nothing#might go play pvz or something. that’s been keeping me entertained
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disabled-queer-culture-is · 1 month ago
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Hey @mod, doing ok?
It's been one heck of a year, anon. One heck of a year. New shark dropped tho, very excited about that
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an-assortment-of-forks · 1 year ago
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there are doctors there are hospitals there are specialists there is medicine there are systems in place so people do not have to suffer and be tortured under their own chronic pain daily and yet. they're all fucking inaccessible to the people who need it most!!! to what I would argue is most disabled people!! I'm so fucking done with the medical system.
#today is an absolutely wretched pain day that makes me want to not be here anymore but guess what!#wasted a whole year trying to convince my doctors I was in significant and disableing pain daily and the best they could do#is tell me to go to PT and to wait 6 months and tell them if it gets better#to prescribe some shit like gabapentin or otc pain meds and write me off#tell me they'll get new X-rays to see if it got worse by the summer#disability exists!! specialists exist! good doctors fucking exist!! somewhere!!! I'm sure!!#but here I sit. in excruciating amounts of pain unable to convince any fucking doctors of anything#and that year I spent pushing myself to the limit is wasted bc at the very end of it all only one guy listened to me#and he said no one in their giant ass facility could diagnose me#so I'm back to square one bc I got a new job which means new insurance and new doctors to try and convince again#I just want to be on disability so i can want to be alive again#I'm so frustrated and in pain constantly#what are people like me who have to work 40hrs to afford to live but don't have any family to rely on supposed to do??#just die? am i supposed to continue to work until im too disabled to move and be profitable unless i get lucky?#bc some fucking doctor finally decides to actually listen???#ive tried ALL THE DAMN TRICKS TOO. telling them a friend has it and thats how i found out. that my previous doctor was looking into it#etc etc#I'm SO done living like this i am exhausted.#and to know that i COULD BE HELPED. RIGHT NOW. is the worst fucking part#these systems are in place so people like me dont have to fucking suffer.#but i cant even do anything about it bc i have a cat.
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roguemonsterfucker · 10 months ago
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Mental illness is wild because I’m in the worst physical anguish that I’ve experienced like. Ever. But I’m not actively suicidal right now. I’m just ready to be better so I can get my birds’ new cage ready like I planned.
Then sometimes I’ll be physically in great shape and be like “life isn’t worth living.”
Just wild.
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riotbeankai · 2 months ago
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I've only been on this dosage of testosterone gel for what, like, a year? how many times do I have to get it refilled before they figure out HOW MANY TO GIVE ME for a 30 DAY FUCKIN SUPPLY for FUCK'S SAKE
#'it says we gave you a 90 day supply'#no you gave my 90 packets i use 3 packets per day so thats a 30 day supply#'it says we dispensed 225'#that's 225 grams because each packet is 2.5 grams so 90 packets is 225#'one moment let me put you on hold'#'okay youre right the day supply was wrong woops we'll get that refill submitted today'#IT'S BEEN NEARLY A WEEK SINCE I PUT IN THE REFILL REQUEST AND I USED MY LAST DOSE TODAY IM SO TIRED OF PHARMACIES AND CONTROLLED SUBSTANCES#i didnt yell at the pharmacist i just said 'cool thank you 😊' but that last tag is what i was internally screaming#this is why i desperately wish i could go back to injections#and other reasons but this is a big one#im genuinely this close to risking anaphylaxis to just give it another try and see if my body will tolerate it properly this time#im so tired of allergy specialists being useless and doctors not giving a shit about what im asking for or what i need#all this headache to get my medication and take it every fucking day and its NOT EVEN AS EFFECTIVE AS INJECTIONS#im slathering a full 3 packets of goop equivalent to like 5 big pumps of hand sanitizer on my legs every fucking morning#and it's NOT EVEN AS CONSISTENT OR EFFECTIVE AS THE ALTERNATIVE#and i cant fucking increase the dose!!#not only will the pharmacy shit its pants even worse every single month#but i literally dont have enough skin surface area to effectively absorb that much fucking gel#im so tired#when are they gonna invent like a testicle transplant so i can make my own fuckin testosterone#i dont even want balls for like dysphoria or aesthetic reasons i literally just want the hormone to naturally occur in my body#im so fucking tired of workarounds
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