#if it gets worse go see a doctor
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Note
bee please help I accidentally ate mold /gen
my stomach feels weird :(
my hot pink limbo doesn't have a âremove mold from bodyâ button either :(((
any advice?
- đ«anon
WHAT THE FUCK. WHATTTT HELPPP????
BRO WHAT RHE FUCK đ« ANON??? I HAVEN'T GOTTEN THIS FAR INTO MY MEDICAL CLASS PLEASE I FONT KNOW YET
UHHHHH okay if it gets like worse, and your stomach is just like absolutely jumping you and nothing else works like medicine and stuff then go see a doctor, but if it gets like way way worse then go to the hospital because that isn't good and it's really bad for your health, but you should be fine depending on the mold and if it wasn't that big but still you'd most likely get sick, black mold Is an instant no no go to hospital if you've consumed it, anything else still if you are having like full on pain in your stomach,
For me I ate a little bit of mold on cheese that I did not know had mold so it was wild but I didn't get sick, but still please be careful eating food and make sure it has no mold or anything, don't eat mold, how the hell did you eat mold, what happened, still, if it gets you really sick go to the doctor and take a lot of medicine and get rest, that isn't good for you, even if it's a different color mold still, if your stomach gets a lot of pain and sharp pain go see a doctor immediately, that is not good and your body isn't supposed to feel that at all.
Don't eat mold guys.
Please let me know if you'll be fine later on, please be okay Jesus don't eat mold or anything with mold it's ok if you didn't see it but be careful next time oh my goddd
#aaaaaaaaaaaa hey its jude or bee#judes little bees#jude replies#judes lovely petals#replying to lovely petals#replying to little bees#ask reply#replies#hiiiii đ« anon#its đ« ginger anon!!#đ« anon?????#đ« anon#đ«#anon????#omg anon#are you okay#are you kidding me#why are you eating thsi#mold#mold????#help#what#please go see a doctor#this is not stardew valley at all#đ« anon are you okay????#oh my god please be okay#don't eat mold#don't eat that#like at all please#if it gets worse go see a doctor
0 notes
Text
Last of her kind Emperor!Alpha!Zhongli + Omega!Dragoness!Reader
cw/tags: Your usual mentions of slavery and sexual themes, A/B/O dynamics and heat mentions. Also allusions to depression and mentions of death.
notes: Aahahaha this took forever..... allow me top explain: first of all my new job is killing me and second of all I'm going through a hard period where I don't really like anything I write anymore. This work in particularly I kept struggling with the pacing, the dialogues, the way I wanted feelings to come across or scenes to flow it's just hhhnnnggg. I told a couple of friends that I set the bar so high with the first part I feel like nothing else I write will be that good. Then the second part was "ok" but cut off in a cliffhanger and has been there for SO LONG that now I feel this will be underwhelming after all the buildup//hit
I hope it's not. I hope it's good.
Anyway this part is in Zhongli's pov and contains flashbacks which will be fully in italics! Enjoy! and thanks for caring so much about this story ;w; ILU all <3
<- Part 2.
Your instincts mess up with your head.
Your crying and anxiety have simmered to a cold numbness.
Hours blur together, time loses meaning.
The doctor comes by sometimes. The maids bring you food. But everything feels⊠off, distant.
This doesnât feel⊠like your usual heats.
You curl up and sob, a choked soft noise.
You donât feel hot, but rather cold. Limbs weak. Dizzy.
Your heart aches.
Youâre so tired.
And so sleepyâŠ
Zhongli puts down the seal stamp and deflates back into his chair with a sigh, he must have read the same line at least five times already. He cannot concentrate at all. Itâs not even been three days and each hour, each minute, feels eternal.
Heâs already gotten so used to your presence, so smitten with you and your little quirks, your rare smiles, the way your ears and tail flicker, your pretty eyesâŠ
And he remembers those same eyes begging for him, teary. Your pitiful cry. Your distressed scent.
Guilt eats at him. As well as something elseâŠ
Heâs been restless, barely slept. Your scent is a sirenâs song on the blankets, tart and fresh and tantalizing, but you are not with him. Anxious energy flows in his veins. This emotion, this thing that is like regret and sorrow and fear all tangled together, cleaves him through. His instincts are screaming at him, rattling inside a cage of his own making. His mate, his precious Omega is in heat, youâre scared and lonely and need him. Zhongli has to suppress a growl and feel the shudder of his scales at the fact that heâs not with you. In your nest. Taking care of you.
Itâs agonizing.
"How is she?"
The same question, over and over, at any chance he gets.
"She refuses to eat, your majesty." Xiao tells him, and he can feel the concern in the younger Alphaâs voice. âAccording to the maids she only took a few bites of the ajilenak nuts, the rest of the food was left untouched.â
âŠ
"She's um... she's always sleeping when I go check up on her." Ganyu explains a little crestfallen. She too is worried. âA-at least I think sheâs in no pain⊠she was clinging to one of your hanfus.â
âŠ
"You should go see her, Zhongli." Ping states, a rare serious expression on her usual gentle factions. âBaizhu says sheâs going through the worst case of separation sickness heâs ever seen. Is that really what you want your poor Yin to go through?â
He lets out a frustrated rumble.
âOf course not. But itâs for the best, I donât want to⊠take advantage of her, or force her to anything.â Zhongli frowns, trying to focus on the papers in front of him again, in an attempt to ignore her piercing gaze.
âIs it really any of that if she wants her mate?â Ping retorts. âShe was begging you.â
I know.
He growls this time, and shakes his head at his memory of you. It haunts him.
âShe doesnât know what she wants.â
âSo, youâre deciding for her then? Is that it? Honestly, are you listening to yourse-â
âSheâs been conditioned to serve.â He cuts her off, voice grave and somber. âTrained to be submissive and please. She likes me simply because Iâm kind to her, she wants me because she thinks itâs her obligation as my mate. I feel the pull of the bond too, the need, the yearning. But I also know she is afraid of Alphas and she thinks⊠she thinks she has to obey me. That she owes me something or that own her.â His eyes narrow. âI didnât need to bond her. I shouldnât have bonded her. I just⊠wanted her to be free and instead I chained her to me. And now sheâs in heatâŠâ
And it drives him insane.
âListen to me, weâve both spent time with her, enough to know sheâs opening up and learning to voice her feelingsâŠâ Ping reasons gently. âItâs a slow process, donât hurt her this way. At the very least⊠go see her.â
âI lost control once with just one kiss from her. I will not do it again. I will not harm her any further.â
The elderly woman keeps silent for a few moments. Zhongli sighs and rests his forehead in his palm in defeat.
And then Ganyu approaches, a little tense, a stack of papers in her hands.
âYour majesty, the Qixing are starting to arrive, council meeting will begin soon.â
âVery well. Thank you Ganyu.â He stands up and nods at her, then turns to Ping and his demeanor softens a little. âYou know I just want to correct my mistakes, and give her the life she deserves. At least a fraction of it, of happiness.â
It wasnât supposed to go this way⊠Zhongli sighed as he walked up to the room where the âreunionâ with the sumerian would take place. It was long overdue seeing as he had spent the night by your side, refusing to leave after you had cried and begged so desperatelyâŠ
After he had bonded you.
He had initially taken the eremiteâs claims with a grain of salt, but naturally he had to make sure. The last dragonblood had supposedly died decades ago, so howâŠ?
And yet when he saw you for the first time in that room, he knew.
You were real, you were beautiful. Suddenly he felt a million things at once: He wanted to get to know you, stay close to you, protect you. Old draconic instinct vibrating excitedly on his soul. You smelled vaguely familiar, your tail was gorgeous, your ears adorable. What if you didnât like him though? What if he harmed you? Scared you? Suddenly he was nervous, nervous of ruining this, nervous in a way he hadnât been in so long, like when heâd been young and Liyue had been at war and he had lost everything to fire and smoke and dust and he had to make difficult decisions and-
He had always calculated his moves. No room for risks. Too much at stake.
But you, you disarmed him. Completely.
You, with your polite gentleness despite the obvious cracks beneath the surface.
You, with your beautiful looks and enormous potential, even if you didnât see it yourself.
You, with that look of yearning and hope, with your soft lips and sweet moans, with your warm body fitting perfectly against his.
For once, he allowed himself to make a decision with his heart, not logic, not politics. Just instincts.
And he claimed youâŠ
âŠ
He enters the room. A couple Millelith soldiers stationed by the door, Xiao standing by his side loyally as he sits at his place of honor as the emperor. Your âmasterâ, an Alpha eremite named Zaheer, kneels respectfully a little below.
âI see you liked her, your majestyâ He offers a sly smirk. âDid she satisfy you properly? Sheâs been trained on her gag reflexes to-â
Zhongli -Morax- resists the urge to growl. âWe are not here to discuss that.â
âAh, of course, business!â
Business.
âSince sheâs such an exotic and well-trained slave I suppose we could agree onâŠâ
âDo you think of me an idiot, Zaheer?â Moraxâs eyes narrow.
âP-Pardon me?â
âShe is a pureblood xiÄnshĂČu. I want to know exactly how she ended up being enslaved by you and your people.â
Cold and calculating golden eyes stare down at the eremite.
âW-What⊠sheâs desert-born!â Zaheer retorts back angrily âShe was born at a heat house. Maybe she has traits from your people because one of them decided to get a cheap fuck while traveling.â
âYou expect me to believe that?â Morax asks unfazed âLiyue has records of the last of her kind disappearing and presumably being murdered when a village near Sumeru borders was razed to the ground. Do you have a disclosure?â
Zaheer stands up and growls, clearly an Alpha not used to having to bow his head and accept things not going his way.
Clearly an Alpha used to intimidating and attacking others.
Xiao wields his spear and changes his stance to an offensive one. The Millelith guards also tense.
Zaheer gets even more irritated, feeling like a caged animal. Backed into a corner. âEmperor or notâ He starts through gritted teeth. âIf youâre not going to pay me then Iâll take my merchandise back and do business elsewhere where Iâm not being accused of ridiculous claims.â
âYouâre right that I wonât be doing any business with you, but weâll see how ridiculous those claims truly are. Zaheer, by my word as the emperor you will now remain detained in Liyue.â Morax sentences.
The eremiteâs red eyes widen in shock and rage and the desert-dweller shoots up to attack Morax, getting easily overpowered and neutralized by Xiaoâs quick moves. In seconds his weapon drops to the floor as the Yaksha general points his spear at the unconscious man. The Millelith quickly retrieve him and the blade before Morax simply nods at them.
Months. It had been months since then and he had to begrudgingly release the man as no accusation connected him to anything. They were essentially out of leads. There did appear to be documentation of your birth at a desert village but Zhongli would be hard pressed to believe the half-assed story youâve been toldâŠ
And since you are pureblood, then both of your parents, and most importantly your dam, was also a dragonblood. Thatâs at the very least one Liyue citizen enslaved in a foreign nation.
He would get to the bottom of this.
For now, however, he had to cast those worries aside.
The Seven members of the council sit around the large table, the Liyue Qixing, leaders of all the commerce and trade sectors of the nation.
Zhongli takes his place at the head of the table. Ganyu does so as well by the sideline.
âVery well, whatâs our first topic today?â
âDid Master just⊠leave?â
There was silence at the table, Zhongli and Ping sit frozen and you get just a bit nervous.
Itâd been a few days since you started your new life, and though Zhongli was sure you were warming up to it he knew you still had a long way to go. It was probably still a little surreal for you⊠such a big change from everything you knew.
The tension on his shoulders quickly drops again. He continues eating. âYes.â He says simply. Ping follows his lead, saying nothing.
The faster you forget about that eremite, the better.
âHmâŠâ You continue eating as well. Your expression is a little conflictedâŠ
You inhale.
âWas he⊠happy⊠that I finally found a mate?â
Zhongli turns to you sharply and tenses again like a cat bristling. He holds back his tongue so as to not say something heâd regret. Why do you still care about that despicable manâs opinion? Why do you still seek his approval? Did you really think he cared about you? Zhongli desperately wants to make you understand how that slave-owner only saw you as an object, how he fed you lies, how his mistreatment is inexcusableâŠ
But he can only imagine how deep your scars run, and how that toxic mindset has settled and accompanied you for years. He cannot judge you for caring about someone who doesnât deserve it.
âWhy do you ask, dear?â Ping asks instead.
âI donât knowâŠâ You mumble, poking at the congee with your spoon. âI always wanted to make him proud.â
Proud.
Him?
âI think what matters most is how you feel.â Zhongli says, his hand reaching out for yours invitingly and you place your fingers on his palm, getting a soft reassuring squeeze. âYou donât need to rely on how others view you or think about you.â
You seem thoughtful for a second, your ears flickering back insecure but then standing up alert again. âI am happyâ You admit. âVery happy. I have the best mate in the world.â You smile brightly.
Zhongliâs heart does a flip.
âWith the excessive rains in the northern villages, there have been many floods and a lot of crops have been severely damaged or lost. Our previous contingency plan is in action already and donations are being sent to help the affected families. However, we must prepare for a decline in the harvest of certain grains and vegetables this season, as well as an increase in prices for a few months due to the shift in demand and supply.â Keqing explains expertly, the young alphaâs expression is serious and solemn.
âItâs an opportunity to strengthen commerce with Mondstadt and Sumeru.â Ningguang chimes in, leaning back on her chair, arms crossed. âThe value of jade and other crystals is on the rise as well.â
âNot to mention, weâll be employing several architects from the Akademiya to help with the rebuilding.â Keqing adds, turning to Ganyu, who nods.
âGreater lord Rukkhadevata and lesser Lord Kusanali have agreed on a certain exchange program with Liyue. I started drafting up some proposals already if youâd like to see.â The blue-haired secretary passes along some documents.
Ningguangâs eyes skim along the page. âItâs almost like our new Sumeru-born empress was a sign.â She smirks. âBy the way, where is she?â She turns to Zhongli, curious about her fellow Omega.
âSheâs rather indisposed at the moment.â The emperor replies dryly, not wanting to delve much onto the touchy subject. âGanyu this looks good, however we need to think about-â
There is a knock that quickly surprises everyone. Who could interrupt a council meeting and why?
Baizhu peeks in with Changsheng curled around his neck, a frown on his usually gentle features. âYour majesty, a word. Itâs an emergency.â
All the members at the table stare silently as Zhongli stands and follows the doctor.
Ganyu has a bad feelingâŠ
âWe have no time, follow me.â The green-haired doctor walks briskly along the wooden corridors, he looks⊠frustrated, dejected.
âWhatâs wrong?â
He doesnât want to panic. He never panics. But something inside him does. Itâs obvious that this has to do with you.Â
âI apologize, your majesty. I thought it was just a case of separation sickness but⊠the empress is showing signs of widowâs wasting.â
Zhongli stops.
His heart skips a beat. His skin prickles with dread.
âSheâs⊠dying?â
Baizhu shakes his head. âIt hasnât reached that point yet, but⊠sheâs deteriorating.â
The guilt is back. The fear.
âGiven what happened, Iâm pretty certain the shock of your rejection was the trigger. Still, it is highly unusual for a Yin to suffer from widowâs wasting without their partner actually dying, even more so for it to settle so quickly. Her reaction is akin to someone who had never left their mateâs side for years.â Baizhu explains.
You trusted him.
And he turned his back on you.
What have I done?
âIn any casssse, itâssss not too late.â Changshengâs little voice pipes in. Baizhu keeps leading the way and Zhongli follows, though he obviously knows the entire palace like the palm of his hand, at the moment his thoughts are scattered and far far away.
âShe needs her mateâs reassurance. I have done what I can with medicine but this is a bonded pair matter.â Finally, he stops at a juncture and turns to Zhongli. âPlease, your majesty, only you can save her. I will tell Ganyu, Xiao and Ping of the situation, and if you need anything, just ask.â
Zhongli nods, mute.
The snake narrows her eyes. âDonât leave her sssside.â
âChangsheng.â Baizhu shushes.
She is right to chastise him. He deserves that and more.
âI wonât.â Zhongli nods and heads down the hall.
Widowâs wasting.
The words echo in his head. Heâs seen the damage it can do. How a broken bond, the loss of the most important person, can destroy someone inside. Did you really care that much about him? Did he really hurt you that badly?
âPleaseâŠâ
He didnât mean to.
âI have the best mate in the world.â
He feels like a monster.
âI want to stay with you. Sleep together. Like mates.â
He needs to see you. He needs to make sure youâre okâŠ
He stands in front of the nest room. The same one where he first met you.
Opening the doors only slightly to slip inside, Zhongli's eyes widen and a hand flies to cover his nose and mouth when a strong smell shakes him to his very core.
The room he expected to be completely saturated with intense heat pheromones⊠instead bears the acrid scent of despair.
This isnât the lustful call to breed and have children that made an omega vulnerable and pliant. No. It is a desperate cry from a heartbroken omega for their mate to come back, to stay with them, to love and protect them. It is grief.
You are suffering because of him.
To think all this time⊠he was afraid he'd make you uncomfortable. That heâd scare you, hurt you, ruin the bond youâve carefully built. Instead, he is overcome by an all-consuming terror. Every part of him screaming at his mate's weak essence.
And there you are, his precious treasure, his sweet dragoness.
You lay curling in on yourself letting out small muffled sobs.
âY/nâŠâÂ
No reaction.
âDarling, my dear dragonessâŠâ He rushes up to you immediately, grabs your hand and pets your hair. You look so weak, your skin is feverish, how has it only been three days? It feels like a lifetimeâŠ
You shift a little and your eyes blink open, staring at him dazed, red and puffy and your expression defeated. You let out a pitiful whine and more of that bitter sad scent is released.Â
âNo my dear, donât cry, Iâm here. Iâm sorry, Iâm so sorry.â Zhongli coos as he curls up to you, frantically starting to scent and nip at your neck and shoulders affectionately. His horns manifest and his tail follows through, lashing about a little restless. The bond⊠feels wrong, broken. He should be able to intimately feel you this close and yetâŠ
He tries to reposition you a little so you can lie on top of him, rest on his chest. Itâs concerning how easily he can do so, youâre like a ragdoll in his arms, unresponsive and unmoving. His hands cup your face, thumbs rubbing at the traces of tears in your cheeks. You let out a frustrated whimper. âShhhh shh itâs okay. Iâm so sorry.â
Even if he says it a million times, it wonât feel enough.
Zhongli nuzzles at your neck and proceeds to do something he hasnât done since he was practically a teen. He purrs. Itâs a little rusty, comes off more as a grumbling but it seems to work as he feels you relax just slightly in his arms.
âIâm right hereâ Zhongliâs deep voice assures you, tugging you closer, mouthing at the soft skin along your collarbone. âIâm not going anywhere and Iâm all yours, I promise, I promise. I wonât leave you alone, not ever.â He soothes.
He lowers a bit of your clothes at the shoulder and grazes his fangs along your faded mark, you tense and let out a long shaky breath.
âEverything will be ok.â He kisses the spot. âIâm sorry.â
And then he sinks his fangs in to reestablish the claim.
You cry out in pain and squirm, clawing at his clothes, but he holds you, his hand rubbing circles at your back, his tail intertwining with yours.
...
.....
...
At first nothing changes, but after a few moments⊠a low strained purr bubbles up from within you again.
#genshin x you#genshin x reader#zhongli x reader#zhongli x you#genshin impact x you#genchin impact x reader#genshin imagines#genshin impact imagines#crys writes#fem reader#LohK#minors dni#just in case#me: it gets worse#also me: //reader is dying and it's zhongli's fault woops#we have his pov now about the first meeting#a bit of his feelings!!#see I really hope I did a decent job showing his thoughts/side bc I don't want him to come off as âsuddenly Zl is being stubborn/a jerkâ fo#he has valid concerns about the relationship and yes he had good intentions#shoutout to Baizhu best doctor and changsheng for having zero chill#Ping voice of reason#despair and grief are such hardcore words I love how hard they go here
776 notes
·
View notes
Text
Hey y'all! Weird question time, not really a medical question, more a question about doctors office response times? Below a read more in case you want to skip it:
So, last week I may or may not have passed out*, in a way different to the times I may or may not (almost definitely have) passed out before, because this time my blood pressure was not low and my heart rate was not high. I am someone with a long history of cardiac-adjacent issues, endocrine and/or brain related issues, and neurological issues**. I called my primary care doctor early afternoon on Wednesday and did not hear back from his office until after 5pm on Thursday, though the very helpful nurse I spoke to at the front desk squeezed me in for an appointment with a different doc at the same location on Thursday morning. I called my neurologist at the same time Wednesday, and I did not hear back from their office until today, the following Monday. They also were not calling to schedule an appointment. They were calling to see if I'd gotten my referral to an ENT that they send in five months ago, and mentioned they'd gotten my message that I'd "had an incident". I had to get transferred to someone else and say "I saw my primary care doctor already because you did not return my messages and I'd passed out. He did some bloodwork that all turned up normal and told me to talk to my neurologist" before they even considered getting me an appointment (which they did not do! They said they'd call me back tomorrow!) The question: Is that an unreasonable response time? It feels like an unreasonable response time to me, from both my PCP and my neurologist, honestly. Like, the nurse at the PCP's facility got me in to see another doctor, but my PCP didn't know and didn't respond for over a day, and my neurologist took five days and wouldn't schedule an appointment. I suspect the combo of past history of heart and neurological issues and passing out for the first time in years should be the sort of thing that rings alarm bells, right? *when I felt like I was going to fall down if I did not immediately lie down, I chose to lie down and had my eyes closed while lying down and I think I lost time? hard to tell though **I have tachycardia but it's never ever out of rhythm, so technically I don't have heart issues? The tachycardia tends to alarm new doctors though, like I get an express pass to an EKG immediately at the ER. The endocrine and/or brain issue is the salt wasting syndrome. Might be endocrine! Might be brain damage! Hard to tell! Thought it was endocrine for a long time but there's overlap. The neurological issues are migraines and brain fog.
#the person behind the yarn#I am okay! mostly!#pretty sure this is a salt issue#and I'm just not getting the salt warning signs (low blood pressure) because I'm on other meds for that#it could also be blood sugar. can't rule that out because both times it happened downstairs#and my blood sugar tester thing was upstairs and I Was Not climbing stairs#but like. not ideal!! would like doctors to return my damn messages faster!#I know they are overworked and underpaid and short staffed but like#what am I supposed to do? my doc back in California would usually see me same day (I know that's above and beyond)#but when he couldn't fit me in he would give me specific symptoms or thresholds to watch for#and say okay see me tomorrow/the next day but if you get worse or this specific thing happens#go the the urgent care and tell them I said you need a breathing treatment (or whatever it was)
12 notes
·
View notes
Text
I'm feeling so sick today. my symptoms are so much worse.
at least i'm able to write this story a bit before i die
#i don't know that i'm dying#but i'm in bad shape#and still no doctor appointment in sight#my colonoscopy was scheduled for monday but that doctor made me cry#so we pushed it back while we try to get in to see a different doctor#and now i'm kinda regretting that#because i'm getting worse by the day#i'm starting to worry about blood loss now#might end up going to the ER this weekend#but my parents have a funeral on sunday so i don't want them to have to miss that
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
sorry to log on n rant but i need to rant
#tbd.#ooc.#cw complaining#ignore the tags if u dont want to see how my life is going shdfhsf#so im doing my masters yeah#and im like. 75% thru#shouldve been done last month#but bc of the year ive had my uni adviser was rlly nice and sorted a way to extend my student status for another year#to get my dissertation done#like i did my 4 essays n now its just dissertation time#n i was supposed to start it now n get booked in with my mentor n stuff but i cant fucking log into the website#bc u need a MFA#and the MFA app my uni uses wont acknowledge me bc i have a different phone bc my phone broke#and a different number bc my phone contract got cut off#so idk what to do lol i cant log in and do anything#ive rang the IT desk for help 59w9er3424234 times#and everytime i get thru to the actual line n im taken off hold .. they hang up on me#idk if its a system error or my phone bc its a shit old one#but i cant do anything#and my universal credit claim got closed#non uk oomfs its a benefits system#n they help u with money to pay bills whether ur looking for work or unfit to work which is what my doctor said i am bc#my mental health and physical health combines to make me a super loser#n he thinks i might try to K word myself if i take too much on at once after eveerything#like i cant even sit and grieve my dad that died not even 6 months ago yet because i have to much shit to fucking do#like i cant afford to liven now#i cant pay my bills. they keep bouncing and coming back worse#i have debt collectors coming @ me#i am stuck in catch 22 man like not even my support workers can help me rn#and im very lucky that i own my own home bc of my car accident when i was 15 lol but everyone is just telling me to sell it
9 notes
·
View notes
Text
either making the best or worst decision of my life rn
#going off my meds to see if theyâre exacerbating my health issues#first time since i was 13-14 i havenât been on ssri/snris and itâs actually helping like did i just waste 12 years on these medications#actually closer to 15 yikes#anyway itâs been 2 weeks so weâll see lmao#but iâm getting way fewer random hives less headaches and can finally sleep so#i honestly think it was making my POTS 100x worse#donât rec this to anyone else listen to your doctors and your body <3#not a doctor etc etc#personal
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
don't take my pain medication for 1 day and can't handle it
#every 5 days i have to stop a day with the painkillers bcs i can take them longer then that. and every day again im suprised of the pain#how long does this have to go on#every day pain#you cant even imagine to have every second of your life pain and it never stops#it just gets worse every day#another week and a half until i can see the doctor#đđ#anywya hope for me#chronic illness#chronic fatigue#chronic pain#chronically ill
11 notes
·
View notes
Text
yeah so can medical professionals take a moment to gauge whether the patient will be happy about nothing coming up on results before they deliver it like happy news
like yes I'm sure I should be glad there's nothing on the scan, or the blood test, unfortunately this means that my chronic debilitating pain is still unexplained! so thanks but I actually am going to burst into tears right now đ„
#not to mention that ive been waiting literal months for this scan and now youre just discharging me ??? thanks!#oh and the bit where he asked me to tell how i know its nerve pain#i dont know sir!!! maybe im actually exaggerating!! perhaps its a little bit of muscle cramping and im a little idiot !#anyway after i burst into tears he panicked and was trying to make me feel better#and the eay he decided to do this was by telling me that#some people never find out whats wrong with them!!!#hahahahahaha thankyou so much sir that actually really makes me feel better#anyway ive decided to come off my pain meds and see what happens for fun#seeing as they arent doing anything and its steadily getting worse anyways#save me some money by not paying for prescriptions that arent doing anything anyway#ok ive thought about it for a second and maybe thats not a good idea but im going to do it anyway because there's probably a way that i can#deal with the nerve pain without getting acid hand#acid hand im sure is because of my meds#acid hand#insane symptom to describe to medical professionals btw#they look horrified and im there like :) yeah multiple times a day! :) fix me ? :)#and then tell me its not their area and im like well im fairly certain that there isnt a doctor who is going to specialise in#hand feels like its full of burning acid#sooooo#anyway#personal#health stuff
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
AaHHHHGHHH got some mail today that i forgot i was waiting on from the local health sugar to help me with my blood sugar stuff
And they fucking just.. assigned me an appointment date with no input from me so of course it's in the middle of a fucking work day and i have no time off left to spend on yaking the day off, and it's late enough in the morning that i can't reaaaally scootch my schedule down..
And like maybe i could find a way to finagle a sick day in there but Apparently
I need Literally All Of Those those to cover my first week off after surgery
Because insurance through work comes in a week After you start your leave, because that's when they approve it (this whole coverage thing is making me so steaming boiling mad regardless, this is just shiny deep red cherry on top of the fucking cake i sweaR TO G O D)
So I don't really want to Do that and loose more pay somewhere else
So now I don't know what to fucking do because i Work when the Doctors Offices are Open (just like.. all of them. In general.) so i can't really reschedule, but cancelling may be a bad idea because i probably won't get to go back until after surgery, if i don't have to go back through the application process to see this doctor anyway.
I'm going to start throwing things and having a breakdown I try to actually start looking after my health and I end up in this situation it's disgusting i'm so pissed off.
#monster noises#it's unconscionable to me that i have to use my Vacation Hours.#my hours for VACATION#to attend doctors appoints without loosing pay.#that is cruel and unfair.#it is Also cruel and unfair that my health coverage won't kick in until the first week after my surgery.#and that it will only cover Half of my regualr pay.#as if the mere act of needing recovery time makes everything Magical Cost Less#so if you see me really start promoting my kofi soon you'll know why#2024 fucked me Up Financially.#i had a big loss early in the year when i had to grocery shop twice on the same paycheck#because of the pre-diabetes business#and with the government stealing my taxes for the past two years because they made a fucking mistake i had no extra little boosts#helping me keep up my buffer#so it's just gotten worse and worse and i've had to dip into my saving buffer i think every month since september#to get through the end of the month#which is just the Best position to be in to go off work for six weeks#but i'm Not postponing surgery#i'll just have to grit my teeth and muddle through#still No clue what to do about this appointment though like Fuck
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
psych evaluation the 31st like at least its this month. i fucking guess
#i have the fact that im between 18-25 going for me if i were older who knows when i'd see someone#'if you get worse in the meantime contact your doctor' thanks thats so helpful
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
alright anorexia is boring, letâs get yolked
#yeah so i gained 20lbs and started hitting the gym pretty hard two months ago#struggling with weight restoration/relapse urges worse than ever BUT iâm also feeling good about my progress and enjoying myself immensely#honestly didnât realize how bad i missed lifting#and now that i have time off work i can actually focus on getting my nutrition right (i.e. actually consuming enough protein for once)#pegasus speaks#my face#my ancient ipod camera is shit quality but my abs are starting to show for the first time in like ⊠1.5 years lol#and im pleased with my anterior/lateral delts! although my pecs need some serious work. wtf#i train chest 2-3x/week and i can still see bones fml#ed ment tw#weight tw#ask to tag#i feel like iâm kind of relearning all my limits. like in terms of physical/mental energy and stuff. idk#doing a lot of research and figuring it out as i go. trying to avoid falling into systemic fatigue etc#iâm already exhausted all the time but my doctor told me i should keep active so. i am#as much as i love the gym i do have to compensate in other areas of my life#if i want to push myself this hard then thatâs my choice. but like. i need to give up on doing other things. give and take. spoon theory#etc etc etc
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
thereâs so much i wanna do this week/month/etc but iâm just too sick, i have no energy, i canât sleep, iâm constantly nauseous and headachey and on the verge of a migraine, iâm stressed and irritable and impatient and panickyâŠâŠ.how tf did i survive nearly 5 years of high school untreated if i canât even manage this when i donât have any major obligations rn
#at least i finally got my meds so hopefully i feel a little better soon#although iâm now on 20 pills per day which is Just Great#whenever iâm in remission itâs nice to just. forget sometimes that this can happen at any time#kinda wish i had the typical kinda chronic illness that people talk about with âflaresâ#or at least triggers that i can plan around#the other times have all had an easily identifiable stressor tho tbf. idk what caused this one#the first time was whooping cough and the next few were all very major life stressors like my cat dying right after i started uni#and i think also towards the end of my honours thesis?#but thisâŠâŠ.thereâs no major stress right now. nothing wildly beyond normal#iâm a little concerned about my joints tho. theyâve been so much worse than normal the last few months#so iâm kinda worried iâm developing rheumatoid arthritis (also an autoimmune disease and it runs in the family specifically)#so if thatâs happening then it could set my thyroid off? probably should get to the doctor at some point#obv iâm seeing my endo for thyroid stuff. but i should see my gp and get her to run all the autoimmune blood tests again#iâve done that before but itâs been a few years and my ankles and knees are so painful i canât even walk properly a lot of the time#BUT I JUST WANNA DO THINGS I ENJOY AND I CANT AND I WILL CONTINUE TO COMPLAIN ABOUT IT#âoh youâre so lucky you donât have as many obligations because youâre chronically illâ ha ha ha please swap lives with me immediately#personal#but seriously. i wasnât diagnosed until i was nearly 17 and we can trace it back to whooping cough when i was 12#so it was the last half of year 6 and then all of years 7-10 and the start of year 11 of just being. uh. âvery lazy and complaining a lotâ#and TEACHERS joking about me and my sister (who was dealing with an arguably more severe undiagnosed disease) missing so many classes#wow so funny pdhpe teacher whoâs supposed to be teaching is about health#and the thing with being a mentally ill teenager is that hyperthyroidism can just look like a very severe anxiety disorder#so i didnât go to the dr until i was too sick to go to school at all. and luckily had a good dr who did a blood test#iâm just rambling now because i canât sleep and i donât wanna lie here doing nothing#might go play pvz or something. thatâs been keeping me entertained
8 notes
·
View notes
Note
Hey @mod, doing ok?
It's been one heck of a year, anon. One heck of a year. New shark dropped tho, very excited about that
#not disabled queer culture is#got a cane its purple and sparkly and i love it#entered into a lovely indefinably queer relationship with a fellow AAA battery :3#ITS ALL VENTING AFTER THIS TAG SORRY#moved to a new position at my job that is simultaneously so much better and so much worse for my health#pros: less standing more sitting; early day hours so im not feeling like my day is over the second i get home due to time blindness;#i get to go home pretty much as soon as im done with my work; its mentally engaging; i can have headphones in#cons: 4 am is when my workday starts; i come home and sleep the rest of the day; i'm working more hours than i realistically can#because the alternative is make my coworker work herself into the hospital and make myself have to work 60-70 hour weeks (aka: summer 2024)#because none of the people with any actual power to change that situation will listen to my proven to be extremely correct concerns#because they think im a stupid little kid#uhhhhh non work related. well kinda work related. the fatigue from work caused this#dropped out of college after flunking an entire semester's worth of classes#got put in the endless loop of 'we'll do a blood test' 'looks normal see you next time and we'll do another blood test'#tried to get in to see a doctor at mayo clinic#got rejected and basically told my case was too hopeless to put strained resources on#currently ive more or less given up on healthcare matters for now#so uhh yeah. we ball
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
there are doctors there are hospitals there are specialists there is medicine there are systems in place so people do not have to suffer and be tortured under their own chronic pain daily and yet. they're all fucking inaccessible to the people who need it most!!! to what I would argue is most disabled people!! I'm so fucking done with the medical system.
#today is an absolutely wretched pain day that makes me want to not be here anymore but guess what!#wasted a whole year trying to convince my doctors I was in significant and disableing pain daily and the best they could do#is tell me to go to PT and to wait 6 months and tell them if it gets better#to prescribe some shit like gabapentin or otc pain meds and write me off#tell me they'll get new X-rays to see if it got worse by the summer#disability exists!! specialists exist! good doctors fucking exist!! somewhere!!! I'm sure!!#but here I sit. in excruciating amounts of pain unable to convince any fucking doctors of anything#and that year I spent pushing myself to the limit is wasted bc at the very end of it all only one guy listened to me#and he said no one in their giant ass facility could diagnose me#so I'm back to square one bc I got a new job which means new insurance and new doctors to try and convince again#I just want to be on disability so i can want to be alive again#I'm so frustrated and in pain constantly#what are people like me who have to work 40hrs to afford to live but don't have any family to rely on supposed to do??#just die? am i supposed to continue to work until im too disabled to move and be profitable unless i get lucky?#bc some fucking doctor finally decides to actually listen???#ive tried ALL THE DAMN TRICKS TOO. telling them a friend has it and thats how i found out. that my previous doctor was looking into it#etc etc#I'm SO done living like this i am exhausted.#and to know that i COULD BE HELPED. RIGHT NOW. is the worst fucking part#these systems are in place so people like me dont have to fucking suffer.#but i cant even do anything about it bc i have a cat.
12 notes
·
View notes
Text
Mental illness is wild because Iâm in the worst physical anguish that Iâve experienced like. Ever. But Iâm not actively suicidal right now. Iâm just ready to be better so I can get my birdsâ new cage ready like I planned.
Then sometimes Iâll be physically in great shape and be like âlife isnât worth living.â
Just wild.
#suicide cw#now if this illness lasts too much longer my tube might change#because this is fucking awful#Iâve avoided going into detail about my illness because itâs uh#unpleasant to say the least#I have a doctor appointment on Wednesday so weâll see#I feel like itâs passing honestly#I feel worse but I think thatâs good#Iâm hoping this is the hump and Iâll start getting better
10 notes
·
View notes
Text
I've only been on this dosage of testosterone gel for what, like, a year? how many times do I have to get it refilled before they figure out HOW MANY TO GIVE ME for a 30 DAY FUCKIN SUPPLY for FUCK'S SAKE
#'it says we gave you a 90 day supply'#no you gave my 90 packets i use 3 packets per day so thats a 30 day supply#'it says we dispensed 225'#that's 225 grams because each packet is 2.5 grams so 90 packets is 225#'one moment let me put you on hold'#'okay youre right the day supply was wrong woops we'll get that refill submitted today'#IT'S BEEN NEARLY A WEEK SINCE I PUT IN THE REFILL REQUEST AND I USED MY LAST DOSE TODAY IM SO TIRED OF PHARMACIES AND CONTROLLED SUBSTANCES#i didnt yell at the pharmacist i just said 'cool thank you đ' but that last tag is what i was internally screaming#this is why i desperately wish i could go back to injections#and other reasons but this is a big one#im genuinely this close to risking anaphylaxis to just give it another try and see if my body will tolerate it properly this time#im so tired of allergy specialists being useless and doctors not giving a shit about what im asking for or what i need#all this headache to get my medication and take it every fucking day and its NOT EVEN AS EFFECTIVE AS INJECTIONS#im slathering a full 3 packets of goop equivalent to like 5 big pumps of hand sanitizer on my legs every fucking morning#and it's NOT EVEN AS CONSISTENT OR EFFECTIVE AS THE ALTERNATIVE#and i cant fucking increase the dose!!#not only will the pharmacy shit its pants even worse every single month#but i literally dont have enough skin surface area to effectively absorb that much fucking gel#im so tired#when are they gonna invent like a testicle transplant so i can make my own fuckin testosterone#i dont even want balls for like dysphoria or aesthetic reasons i literally just want the hormone to naturally occur in my body#im so fucking tired of workarounds
2 notes
·
View notes