#if i take you home tonight

[chaptertwo-thepacnw]

lisa lisa and cult jam with full force |1984|

[shotmrmiller]

in which johnny gifts the love of his life a sex toy outta nowhere

when you mumble into the phone that you miss him, johnny, he pauses for a second, then tells you he's going to bring you a gift back home. "to keep ye company, hen." after, he locks himself in a bathroom stall and watches you play with yourself until you both come.

but you'd thought he'd bring you a pet. a live animal that needs a cage to be brought across the world, not a long, slim unmarked box.

it's a sex toy. and it's rather large, at that. your hand wraps around the base, fingertips still a good inch apart.

"and i'm supposed to be using that?" his arms wrap around your waist, his thick stubble grazing the sensitive skin of your neck, raising goose flesh.

"don't like it? only had ye in mind, hen." he presses a wet kiss on your fluttering pulse. you've never really talked about toys in your relationship. you don't need them, of course, and johnny more than makes up for the time lost between you two whenever he's home but this?

"i don't know," you mumble. "a bullet would've made more sense, i think. at most a rose." his hands run up your sides, to the swell of your breasts and give you a gentle squeeze. he doesn't believe the tripe of people valuing size over all else, does he? the thing is easily as thick as your forearm and it's corded with veins. and it's uncut. whoever is making these are going to extreme lengths to make it as realistic as possible.

he bucks his hips, prominent bulge in his jeans coming to rest in the small of your back. of course he'd get excited. menace.

"ye willnae have t'use it alone now tha' i'm here. 'sides, i think ye'd look perfect with my pretty kitty stretched thin around it." johnny grabs your hips firmly, creating small divots as his grip tightens. "maybe i'll watch ye fuck yerself on it, hm? lap at yer clit while ye do." liquid heat pools in your belly, pulsing hot between your legs.

he really wants you to use it, given by his ragged breathing and he rutting himself against you. fine. "okay. just, not right now, yeah? i want only you in me." his eyes burn fluorescent as he nods, his large hand cradling your head as he pulls you in for a kiss.

you missed this. the sweet sting of his cock sliding home in your aching cunt, the sharp pinch below your navel when his tip comes to sit snugly against the plug of your womb. you've missed this. missed him.

maybe he'll forget all about that monstrosity sitting in the box.

-

he doesn't. he's bringing it up hours later, his spend still dripping warm on your thighs. johnny cannot be serious.

"course i am, hen." his fingers sweep at the hair stuck to your sweat-slick forehead. "is it a crime to want to see ye split open on some- something else?"

you think nothing of his stutter. "alright," you groan. if that's what he wants. it'll be interesting to see just how much you can take. you'll never tell him that your pussy clenched around nothing at the thought, his cum trickling out faster, pooling on the sheets.

-

it's not warm. the tip of it presses against your swollen entrance, cold in contrast to your heated flesh. johnny watches you swallow a gasp, your trembling hands reaching for his as you slide down an inch, two, three. johnny's cum is wonderful lube, but the searing burn- the size of toy is overwhelming, your walls being wrenched apart as you glide down further. johnny presses a prickly kiss on your cheek, cooing in your ear all the while his clever fingers draw gentle circles on your clit. "focus on breathin', bonnie. yer tensin' up."

desire begins to bubble beneath your skin, pleasure causing your muscles to warm and slacken, and after a long couple of minutes, you find yourself at the base.

but then johnny grabs your hips from behind and pulls- oh. "that's it." if you'd thought the toy had originally been in your stomach, it's now in your throat. "pretty as a peach, hen. jus' wha' i wanted to see." a shiver dances up your spine, notches trembling as you get used to the unforgiving stretch of the toy. his breath warms the side of your neck. "on yer go."

you come around it no less than three times, leaving it milky and johnny cleans it up with his mouth before he cleans you up.

-

the girth of it is something you'll never get used to but it does get easier. when johnny goes back to work, he tells you that all he asks for are videos of you using it. for his collection, he greedily says.

you send him as many as you can, no matter the hours. just a quick nsfw text before getting his thumbs up and away it goes. it's incredibly fun. the relationship hadn't been dull by any means, but this just feels invigorating. you feel rejuvenated. that johnny is your biggest cheerleader while using it is such a bonus.

you oughta marry him. maybe you'll elope the next time he's home. but when the next time comes, johnny calls you instead of messaging you the usual be home soon text.

and it sends you reeling.

bonnie. the toy treat ye well while i was gone?

no better than you could me, but yeah. i'm still sore from using it in the last video i sent you.

that's great. if ye like the toy then ye'll love the real thing, i ken. we'll be there in 10.

[lastflowerofyourhouse]

let me paint you a picture.

harrowhark nonagesimus is seventeen years old. a young seventeen. a horribly old seventeen. she has known one home in her entire life. she exists wholly and completely to protect it, and she has never treated it with anything but complete and ardent love. these people are not good, they have not been good to her or for her, but they are her family and she is their gaurdian, and it is home. she is a creature of habits and routines, and drearburh is everything she's ever known. she is seventeen.

and she recieves a letter. it offers her everything she needs. a way to protect her family, to save her home, to ensure that everything she knows and loves is safe and prosperous, and that they will never again need as desperately as they needed her. but she has to leave them. she has to leave them for the first time in her entire life, and she may never come back.

she is permitted to bring one person from home. only one. she may not bring the man who raised her, or the woman who advised her, or the vulnerable elderly whose lives she has been carefully extending since she was a child.

she has a cavalier, though. he is the very model of a drearburh cavalier. he is precisely what her competition will be expecting, and he will do whatever she asks of him. she knows he will try to escape, of course, because she knows they've got a shuttle coming. he and his mother will try to steal the shuttle, inevitably, if it arrives.

the solution is simple. cancel the shuttle. bar ortus's mother from the room when the announcement is made. there's nothing the mother can do.

but harrow doesn't do that. she doesn't cancel the shuttle. she wants them to take it. she doesn't want ortus. instead, she spends an entire night wrecking her hands in hard dirt, doesn't even use a shovel in her desperation. she doesn't want ortus.

harrowhark nonagesimus is going to be alone, in an unfamiliar environment, for the first time in her entire life. she is going to be barred from her only home, perhaps forever. she is seventeen years old.

and she wants gideon nav.

[fadedrainbowbookshelves]

Frank Frankly: Resident Bug Relocator.

[perilegs]

my sweet little baby man is no longer with us

[bottombaron]

wait.

if Nandor knew that the only way to reverse the transformation was to kill the vampire that sired Guillermo...

he was going to travel the world...with his best friend...go back to his home...turn Guillermo at the banks of the Tigris

in s3 finale, after Guillermo had cornered Nandor, proving he can have violent intent towards him, Nandor says, "yes, yes. this is what I've been waiting for. you've passed the test"

but he wasn't talking about being a vampire...

he was talking about what he would have to do after...

[teathattast]

Now the sun's out, we're feeling its sweet light

Waves are crashing, they're flying those long kites

And I can see it, I can see where our lives go

See us sailing across so many oceans

[davemustaine]

megadeth, 1988

[butts-bouncing-on-the-beltway]

Local parent visits child and comments on the shyness of one of the cats in the household, child decides not to mention that said cat has literally never met a human she didn't try to climb like a cat tree while headbutting them for attention, more at 11

[the-jam-to-the-unicorn]

Words can't begin to describe how much I hate that he has to write this and has to deal with that lunatic again and has to play nice.

[badolmen]

Not to be extreme but dear God hold onto hope.

Things will be better one day. People will sing and dance in colorful clothes under dazzling lights again. A parent will rock their child to sleep on a quiet night again. A grandparent will teach their grandchild to cook a family recipe again. People will laugh and cry and love and grieve in the most mundane of ways once more. This will happen no matter what you believe, but hoping and believing in such things will ease your heart and kindle your resolve to see it within your lifetime. Have hope, and you will give life to the world you hope to see.

[daincrediblegg]

Ok real quick bc I wanna prove my mother wrong

Because my mom literally brews one pot of coffee at the top of the week (in a normal coffee maker), drinks from the same brewed pot throughout the week (from the pot. No bottling it. No refrigeration. Does not reheat it. Just room temperature coffee that has sat in the pot for up to a week). Makes a new one when she runs out.

[flamingtoads]

Based on the lovely fic: Take Me Home Tonight by @Cassiopeiasara💜

[black-and-yellow]

JDNT

[thatrandombystander]

Heartwarming! Person who was getting increasingly concerned cramps were gonna ruin their weekend plans and mood instead starts their Time Of Blood on Friday morning meaning the worst of the cramps should be over by Saturday morning 👍

[truly-quirkless]

[@frogsonalotusleaf | From here!]

Yagi nearly flinched at that mention- an awkward half-smile crossing his face. Yeah,- he'd never been one for paperwork, not when it came to Hero business. Even at his agency, there were others under him who filed most of his reports.- But he had slowly been forced to take on more and more files and sortings, until it had become an every-day task, these past few months...

Being a teacher really was something else.

His smile fell, however, at the utterance of him 'trying harder'. That was what he'd done for so many years- but now, when all he could do was follow a doctor's instructions and hope it kept him alive...his old friend wanted him to do more. He exhaled softly. I'm not that strong, anymore.-- It was something he was slowly coming to grips with.

"...I can't." It sounded like an excuse- but it didn't ring any less true. What he had- what was left- was a delicate balance. He was trying to gain back some form of strength...what little remained...but he couldn't gain back some things. I can't be All Might anymore. The strain was too much. Even just looking like the old Hero for more than a second was enough to cause bloody coughing fits...

I can't be the Hero you want me to be, Nighteye.

"A soup doesn't need to have solids, but...if you're sure." He wouldn't push the issue. As much as Yagi wanted to help...he knew that (at least, personally) he would resist the aid of others if it was offered...and he had no doubt Nighteye would resist his.-- He sighed under his breath. The blond didn't have much he could do, and it seemed both of them were dancing the old subject. Maybe...it would just heal, on its own. Over time...those years apart might fade, but he worried.

Even his attempt at bringing it up had failed. It seemed Nighteye was rather intent on his personal life. Been there, he thought. When he'd been hospitalized- and for a long time after- he'd done everything he could to avoid anything down-putting. But the two would have to circle back to the original topic eventually.

"Well...they definitely joke a lot- though I don't think you'd care for their...style..." Toshinori rested his hand on his chin, thumb pressed slightly against his cheek, his fingers splayed out slightly along the other. "...they're scrappy, and can handle themself in a fight. The first night we met, they actually attacked some would-be robbers with a cookie tin..." He chuckled slightly at the memory.

"...they always seem to know how to make their coworkers smile, and I've seen them chatting with some of the ki--- students.-- Young Midoriya actually took a bit of a shining to them." He grinned. It was nice that his successor and his soulmate could get along. "Though they're really anxious when it comes to the general public..."

He wondered if it was okay to be saying that when Fin was on the same floor- but he doubted they wouldn't give him and Nighteye some privacy.

"I actually asked them to come with,...if you want to meet them." More to keep him company, though thinking about it...he probably shouldn't have invited them while he was speaking to Mirai. But, what was done was done.