#if anyone has ideas or suggestions let me know!

[temporarywelcome]

A Bit of Lunch and Thievery - Spencer Reid

REQUESTED!

The Request: HI! I have a request: What if, kleptomaniac!reader has lunch with spencer at the BAU and keeps yapping loudly about her interests (or her job) and she keeps like taking things from his desk and he keeps slapping her hand away (perchance cameo of some amused BAU members?) -anonymous

CW: light swearing, a suggestive comment, klepto!reader, technically part of my "Smooth Criminal" series but each part can be read as standalone

AN: sorry I was gone for so long lmao lacrosse, school, and depression is rough. also does anyone else struggle writing fics when they're down bad for someone? anywayyyy-

_______

Words: 1.3k

It was a normal day at the BAU office. 

Well, obviously not a normal day considering they were even at the office and not on a jet across the country. The BAU was having a mysteriously mundane day full of filling out and organizing paperwork, so normal and boring that it was almost odd to them.

Of course, the peace had to end eventually. 

Spencer Reid’s phone rang, and he was fishing it out of his pocket immediately. The ringtone for this contact was different from the default ringtone that came with the device, different from the ringtone literally every other contact had. She had took the time to download the ringtone herself, stating he should always know when she was calling him because she was oh-so important.

Well, to him, she was. 

“Hello?” he said simply, leaning back in his chair. He could see Prentiss seated at her desk, JJ standing over her with a coffee complaining about some over-the-top thing her son, Henry, had done the night prior. 

“Hey, babe!” his girlfriend, Y/N, chirped on the other line. She was always so chipper, always so energetic. He was not. 

“You know I’m at work, right?” he deadpanned, though the corners of his lips curled ever so slightly. He could never be stone-faced when talking to her. 

She was used to his dry tone, not acknowledging it, “Why, yes, I do. Now let me in, I brought you lunch,”

Instantly, his eyes brightened, “Wait, you’re outside right now?”

“Mhm. Now let me in before the food gets cold.” 

Within the next six minutes and seventeen seconds, Spencer was back at his desk, but this time, with his lovely girlfriend seated next to him. He quietly ate the Spanish food she had bought as she spoke about her day. It was only 1 p.m., and he was sure she woke up extremely late, but, not to his surprise, she had a lot to say. A lot to say, despite the fact her day consisted of waking up and driving to get Spanish food and visiting him. 

“...yeah, I think we should get a dog,” Y/N said after explaining her run-in with a woman and her large doberman. Being herself, upon seeing the doberman running dead at her, instead of running away, Y/N had opened up her arms excitedly to hug the beast. 

She was lucky it was a nice doberman. 

“A dog?” Spencer’s brows furrowed as he contemplated the idea, “I don’t know…” 

“Well why not?” she pouted, and, not to his surprise, snatched the stapler from his desk. 

“Because I’m barely home,” he replied, gripping her wrist (a reflex at this point), other hand plucking the stapler from her and placing it back where it was before. “You’d be the one taking care of it the most, and that’s not fair.”

“Hmph,” her eyes darted to the stapler again then back to her rice, “I wouldn’t mind,”

Her hand reached for the stapler again and he gently slapped it, not even acknowledging it. See, his beautiful, wonderful girlfriend had her issues. Main issue being her diagnosed kleptomania, a condition that gave her uncontrollable urges to steal objects, no matter how useless and unneeded. 

Like the stapler which she kept eyeing. 

Upon his team finding out about her and her condition, they were all incredibly iffy on her, except Garcia, who was the one who uncovered everything anyway. One by one, Y/N was able to get the approval of each teammate, even Rossi, who had disliked her the most. 

He still didn’t trust her very much, but the rest of the team found her antics quite amusing. 

“Yes you would,” he told her, taking a sip of his drink, “You’d be fine with it for the first month or so, but then you would start getting annoyed with me and telling me I should be helping you take care of our son or daughter or whatever you would like to call it,”

Y/N paused, knowing he was 100% correct. Especially about the son or daughter part. “I think I’m more of a boy mom,” 

“Ignoring the point, I see,”

“Shut up,” she grumbled. 

“Hey, Reid, good afternoon Reid’s girl,” Morgan greeted with his usual smirk, a decent-sized stack of papers in hand, “Food looks good,”

“It is,” Spencer confirmed. Morgan plopped the papers down onto the genius’ desk. “Did you know there are over one hundred, twenty thousand varieties of rice- Y/N,” he slapped a hand down onto the stack of papers as Y/N went to snatch it up. “No,” 

“Sorry,” she grumbled, crossing her arms over her chest. 

“You are way too fun and entertaining to want to read those,” Morgan joked before deciding to leave back to his own desk. 

“Yeah…” she muttered, bringing her hand up to bite her thumb nail nervously, “Way too fun and enter….” she trailed off, Spencer picking up his pen in time before she could snag it. “Shit,” she placed her hands onto her lap, “Maybe I should go…”

“No no no,” Spencer took her hands into his own like he always did when she was getting her urges, “I’m happy you visited me. Stay a little longer,”

“I am a kleptomaniac in a federal building, this was a bad idea,” 

“It’s okay, it’s okay, that’s what I’m here for,” he gave her hands a gentle squeeze, “Don’t worry about it, I’ll make sure you don’t leave with anything,”

“A klepto dating a federal agent is so ironic,” she chuckled humorlessly, “How do you deal with me?”

“I don’t deal with you, I don’t tolerate you,” he replied, “Because you’re my girlfriend and I love you. I’m simply with you, because of the fact I love you,” 

“Don’t talk to me like that, I’ll fuck you,” she huffed, pulling her hands away while blushing red. 

“You did not just say that at my place of work,” he gasped, now blushing as well. He swiftly looked around to see if any of his coworkers were listening. He was sure every single one of them were, considering how nosy they were when it came to his relationship.

“Your fault, don’t talk to me like that,”

“Don’t talk sweetly to my girlfriend?” 

“Makes me all blushy and giggly,” she shrugged, beginning to smile as she looked away. 

“I’ll talk to you like one of your directors, I suppose,” Spencer teased gently. Y/N was an incredibly strong dancer, and had her experiences with rude and stress-inducing directors. 

She rolled her eyes and laughed, “I’ll kill myself,” Her eyes met his and she giggled softly, leaning in for a quick kiss, which he returned happily. 

“They’re so cute,” JJ told Prentiss fondly, taking a sip of her coffee, “They’re really good for each other,”

“They are,” Prentiss agreed with a nod and smile, “They’re the kind of people who you would least expect get together, but it just makes sense when they do,” 

At that moment, Hotch entered, a stressed look on his face. JJ and Prentiss exchanged looks, already thinking it was time to pack for a new case. 

Instead, he simply asked, “Has anyone seen my ID?”

Agent Aaron Hotchner? Losing his ID? Something so important, belonging to someone so aware and responsible? A completely out-of-character thing for him to do-

“Uh,” Y/N cleared her throat awkwardly, giving Spencer a knowing look. 

With a sigh, Spencer held out a hand, allowing her to drop Hotch’s ID into it.

[lewcidreamr]

After class:

Juane was sitting in the empty class room with Glynda, averting his eyes from looking at Ms Goodwitch, as she smirks as she has him right where she wanst him

Ms Goodwitch:

Jaune: Miss Goodwitch

Ms Goodwitch: Jaune i understand that as a young man and a hunter that you need some "stress relief", but may i suggest that bring scu "items" arent a good idea

Jaune: Yes miss i understand that-

Ms Goodwitch: May i suggect that using birth control are far more effective and undetected compared to condoms

Jaune: Miss goodwitch?

Ms goowitch lead down her fiar and unbutton her blouse,

Ms Goodwitch: please Jaune call me Glynda

Jaune: Ma'am i mean glynda

Ms Goodwitch: (so cute, im surpised pyrrha didnt snacth him up, i dont mind)

Glynda: do you know how they work?

Jaune: yes i had a sex ed class before

Glynda: (is he.... a virgin? yes) i mean have you ever used them, or have done intercourse with anyone at all?

Jaune: No, ma'am this is my first time

Glynda:(dear god, i hit the jack pot)

Glynda: i see, i suppose that i will have to teach you,

Jaune suttered out a response: mis- miss

Glynda: call me glynda

Jaune: yes sorry mis- i mean Glynda

Glynda: it is clear that you never had experience sex before and it can be overwhelming so it would only be fair that i assist you with your first time as i have experience

Jaune: if you say so

Glynda: i do say so, now removed your clothing and let me give you a lesson on the "education of love"

Goodwitch: Jaune Arc! I found these condoms in your desk! Care to explain how they got there?

Jaune: W-What?! But I didn't-! I would never-! (Everyone stares at him, Blushing red face) I-I don't know how they got there!

Pyrrha: (Growling, Thinking) Damn you, Professor! I know you put them there!

Goodwitch: (Turns around, Smirks) I'll see you after class, Mr. Arc.

[katiekatdragon27]

Hey. Hey, guys. You'll never guess what I've been drawing.

Glisten: ...??

Glisten and his lame ass boyfriends!!!!!! Cheers to art dumps <3

[CW: SUGGESTIVE JOKE] More doodles below cut:

So! I know most of you come for the shinyshrimp stuff (WHICH WE WILL GET TO) but let me yap about Glisten and Razzle for a bit.

I LOVE YOU GLITTERMASK THEY COULD NEVER MAKE ME HATE YOU GLITTERMASK-

Glisten and Razzle got together like 3 months after Glisten and Boxten broke up. Razzle never really looked to Glisten that much outside of acquaintances (cuz he was kinda sorta lowkey jealous of Glisten's charisma and stage-presence). In fact, they were much more focused on Vee and maybe possibly had a crush on her, which is really funny in hindsight with Dazzle lol. However, after learning that Vee was a lesbian/being very rudely rejected by her, Razzle found comfort in Glisten and fell head-over-heels almost immediately.

The only problem is, Razzle has -10000 aura. His ass cannot be flirty or cool-charismatic at all.

Glisten: What do you do when you aren't distracting? Razzle: (Glisten likes mysterious people) I sell drugs!! Glisten: ... Excuse me? Razzle: (But Glisten also likes kind people) But ONLY to kids in need! Dazzle: (STOPSTOPSTOPSTOPSTOPSTOP-) *defeated whimper*

Razzle thinks he's that guy (they're not, they're pathetic honestly lol)

Also like, Razzle is suuuper dense when it comes to everyone except Dazzle. They struggle with self-reflection and other-people reflection, so he is completely convinced he is doing all the right things, when in actuality, they are very very very cringe.

Razzle: No see Dazzie, this is why they call me Rizzle. Dazzle: (No one has EVER called you that.)

Denseness is one hell of a drug, aye, fellas?

Dazzle is being pulled through the wringer trying to preserve whatever was left of her (and Razzle's) pride. It's not working. Girl is fighting for their life every time she is dragged over by Razzle in order to say a horrible pick-up line to Glisten.

(This is all pre-relationship btw. After they get together it becomes an inside joke and Glisten retorts with his own awful (although not nearly as bad) pick-up lines)

Now the moment you've been waiting forrrr 🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁

✨ Shinyshrimp ✨

I love them chat, I love them sm. They have so much drama and love and interesting things going on, they're so cool and fun n stuff and AUGHHHHH💥💥💥

Shrimpo being that one guy who craves affection but would literally bite anyone who gives it to him is so real to me. Homie wants a hug but ends up suplexing whoever hugged him outta reflex. Glisten, on the other hand, is one of the most affectionate people ever. He's not affectionate to everyone, but when you catch his interest (both platonic and romantic), he is very verbally and physically affectionate. He'll buy you things, he'll give you hugs, he'll let you invade his personal space, all stuff he would never let normies do.

Shrimpo loves this, however, homie has no idea how to deal with any kind of affection in a positive way. Cat-coded ahh guy. Glisten does find this amusing tho, so he's more inclined to be affectionate with Shrimpo to help him "get over it" in a way.

This is just for shits and giggles. I feel like everyone should draw this meme with their ships. It's a canon event at this point.

What can I say? He was hungry.

Can't forget my fankids. I love my fankids. I miss my fankids. I need to draw my fankids more istg I need to revamp their ask blog soon (especially with some new editions coming soon).

Also Hamlet looks smaller because most of his internal structure is made of ribbon and stuffing, so he shrinks into a ball when happy. He also loafs like a cat, what a guy.

Also also also what the skibidi sigma happened to my prep-jock ship?? Why is it backwards???

I drew these because I had a vision of the little doodle below and only thought it would work if they were swaped... sooooo... here we are.

Scapmi is a preppy goth-ish shrimp with an eye for fashion and artistry. With a smart mouth and a massive ego, he often comes off as an annoyance to others. He loves to be front and center in everything but often has to fight with his internalized idea that everything is a competition that he needs to win no matter what. It causes him a lot of stress and self-doubt, but he'd never let anyone see his weaknesses.

Gash is a shrap-toned violent mirror who speaks more with his fists than his voice. He hates everything that is not himself (and sweets) and makes sure people know that. He used to be a perfectionist, but after an accident permanently cracked his face, he dropped his "perfect" persona in favor of a messy, more hateful one. He wants connection but doesn't know how to express his needs in an understandable way, and that frustrates him immensely.

As you can see, match made in heaven.

Gash: DUDE, WHAT THE F*CK!? Scampi: There's a smudge on you- Gash: I DON'T CARE! LET GO!! Scampi: Not 'til I'm done. (Your natural blush is gorgeous; shame it's on you tho)

So yeah, swap shinyshrimp lore drop yippee.

Have a good one chat, til I reappear again✌️✌️

[bonesxbows]

Unforgettable (Alastor X Reader)

My Masterlist

Everyone at the hotel seems to be overlooking you, talking over you, acting as if you're not really there. Though it's not on purpose, you know they don't really mean to be ignoring you, it still hurts. Everyone except Alastor. He's the first to notice when you start to shut down and slink away. 

(WARNINGS)

Autism spectrum reader

Selective mutism behaviors

Negative self talk (slight depression/overthinking)

Mentions of addiction 

I’m having the most wonderful time in college so far! (insert upside down smiley face here) Anyway this is based on something that happened recently so it’s 100% entirely self indulgent, I’m relying on writing for comfort right now and ya’ll are along for the ride so enjoy! Also I’m sorta undiagnosed on the spectrum so this isn’t entirely accurate but it is based off of my own experiences, if any of it comes off as offensive to anyone just let me know and I’ll be more than willing to change it. Comments and likes are highly appreciated, I feel like my writing has been in a slump lately so PLEASE let me know if this is any good

Banners by @strangergraphics

You were in your room, laying on your bed with your eyes closed, hands neatly folded on your stomach, and fingers mindlessly fidgeting with themselves. Wordless jazz drifted through the air, broadcasted through an old radio; a gift from Alastor. One that you cherished, the soft noise always doing wonders to soothe your restless mind. You often wondered if that was part of his intention when he had given it to you, if he had known about your condition even back then.

There was a knock at your door, but the visitor didn’t wait for you to answer before opening it. The radio magically shut off on its own once it sensed an intruder. You peeked open an eye, seeing a blurb of blonde hair poke into your doorframe. 

“Heya! We’re meeting down in the lobby for another group exercise, it’d be super if you could join us!” Charlie told you, her attitude as bubbly as ever. She didn’t wait for you to reply before skipping off down the hallway, leaving your door open in expectation for you to follow her. You sighed, getting up and doing just that, not really having much of a choice if you were still going to stay here.

Everyone had already beaten you down there, all congregating together and conversing. Though from your standpoint it sounded more like arguing. You grimaced from the noise but carried on, trudging forward to join the crowd. Alastor sensed your presence almost immediately, whipping his head in your direction once you were close. His smile grew tenfold at the sight of you. He patted the empty space of the couch next to him, silently beckoning you over. You relaxed just a little, Alastor’s presence easing some of the tension this social gathering had brought upon you. As soon as you sat down next to him he snaked his hand around your hips, pulling you closer into his side and resting his claws on your thigh.

The conversion around the two of you continued, though it was getting harder to keep up with what was going on. 

“This is Hell, toots! Ain’t exactly a walk in the park to jus’ cut it off cold!” Angel was standing in front of Charlie, all four arms raised in defense. 

“I get that, Angel, but we can’t exactly allow this sort of behavior forever. I’m open to ideas. Suggestions? Is there a way to ease out of this sort of thing?” She rebutted. You figured they were talking about someone’s addiction, possibly Angel’s himself’s, or maybe Husk’s. Either way, you wanted to help, they were both your friends. 

“Charlie, I-” 

“Ease out? Are you kiddin’ me? Do you know how addictin’ they make this stuff? It’s on purpose, baby! Once you’re hooked it’s for life!” 

But Angel beat you to it. Your words just weren’t fast enough. But you didn’t give up, maybe they just hadn’t heard you?

“That’s true, but-”

“There’s got to be something out there, some kind of cure. Right? Maybe we just haven’t found it yet. Come on, don’t give up hope just yet!” 

Charlie interrupted you this time. She flashed Angel a hopeful smile, but ironically she had just knocked all wind out of your sails. You deflated, defeated, and crumbled in your seat. Any hope that they would listen to you fizzled behind your eyes. You curled into yourself, watching them as they continued their little argument, embarrassment and frustration clouding your mind. You wanted to help, had information that could help, but it was like you were invisible. 

Invisible to all, except Alastor. Who took extreme note of the way your face fell when you kept getting talked over. Who noticed how your always pleasant smile vanished and never came back. And how you tried to practically disappear into the side of his coat. 

Irritation pulled at the corners of his smile, making his eyes twitch. 

When the conversation was more or less over, tempers cooled enough that everyone was at peace again, you were quick to excuse yourself, getting up and fleeing before anyone, especially Alastor, could stop you. You ran, head hung low, not even looking where you were going, just hoping your feet would instinctively carry you back to the safety of your room. Your brain was fuddled, one thought led to another, which led to another, which snowballed into a self-loathing mess. So much of a mess you almost face-planted into the wood of your door. Luckily you stopped in time, huffing a sigh and kicking yourself for not paying attention, before you pushed the door open and walked inside, slamming the door behind you. You threw yourself onto your bed, not caring what went flying where, just caring enough that your embarrassed face could be covered by enough fluff and plushness to not be seen by anyone. 

That is until your radio tuned back to life again, nearly making you just out of your skin at the sudden noise. It flickered through static but eventually evened out to the jazz that had been playing earlier. The peaceful music made your heart ache. You felt stupid. 

Oh, Alastor…your Alastor. You loved how safe and comforting he made you feel, but he deserved better than to put up with your weird antics and moods. 

“Darling? Are you alright?”

As if the radio tuning had been a prelude to his arrival, he had shadow-stepped into your room not three seconds later. You sprang up at the sound of his voice, turning around to see him standing near your desk, leaning against his elbow propped up on top of your radio. You opened your mouth to reply, but yet nothing came out, the words becoming stuck like thick cotton in your throat. So you simply shook your head instead, your gaze falling down to your lap. Your heart hammered in your ears. 

Stupid. You were being stupid. Overreacting. As usual. Just talk to him. 

You didn’t notice him walking over towards you until he was near, sitting down next to you on your bed, resting his cane against a nearby wall. He placed a claw underneath your chin, guiding your face upwards to look at him. He used his thumb to gently tug at the corner of your lips, pushing it upwards into a lopsided smile. One that didn’t stay, your face falling as soon as he removed his finger. 

He sighed at the sight. Though he wasn’t upset, not with you. His smile was compassionate, caring. A rare one he only ever showed you, but worry creased his brow. “You didn’t deserve that treatment, you know. I’d kill them if I could.” 

At that, he earned a small, fleeting, smile. His bloodthirstiness was endearing at times. 

“Ah, there's my darling. Can you use your words, ma chérie?” 

You shook your head again. Your vocal chords failing you, seizing up in your throat. This selective mutism of yours wasn’t new. 

“That’s alright. How about we go up to the studio, hm? Just me and you. I’ll even let you pick out a few records to play on air. How’s that sounding?” He tilted his head towards you, smile glinting with persuasion. 

You nodded eagerly, the thought of being in a safe space alone with Alastor already easing your mind. 

He stood up enthusiastically off your bed and held out a hand for you to do the same. “Wonderful. Shall we be off then? Best get to it while the record player’s still hot!”

(Song: It Had To Be You by Isham Jones)

You were sitting cross-legged on Alastor’s desk, flipping through his collection of records, while he continued on with his broadcast. “Duke Ellington”, “Fats Waller”, “Ethel Waters”, and “Isham Jones” all shuffled through your fingers, names that you had come to recognize over the countless times you had spent up here with Alastor. You handed him the last one your fingertips touched. His grin grew at your selection as he shut off his microphone. 

“A fine choice, dear, a fine choice indeed!” He pulled the black disc out of its sleeve, slotting it into the machine and dropping the needle down onto one of its grooves. The sound of upbeat trumpets and an accompanying jazz band filled the broadcasting studio, the same song playing to any and all tuned in to Alastor’s radio station. He began to hum along, pushing his chair back and hopping up, gently pulling you off of the desk with little warning. You clutched onto him as he grabbed you, your feet dangled mid-air for a moment before you found your footing, earning a chuckle from Alastor as you kicked at nothing. 

But eventually, you found purchase on the ground again, and when you did he began to glide you along, guiding you in circles around the room, one hand in yours and the other firmly around your waist. You kept your free hand on his chest, trying to keep your feet up with his. He didn’t take you dancing often, but when he did you were always reminded of just what time period he originated from. He was a natural, humming along to the tune floating through the air as he graced across the floor himself, leading you with him as he went. When he flicked his wrist and spun you in place you felt something inside of you loosen, easing up after the earlier events of the day. 

“Alastor?” You called out his name. There was a flash of surprise across his face at first, no doubt he had become accustomed to the silence, but it quickly gave way to fondness. He pulled you closer to his chest, slowing down his movements around the room. 

“Yes, ma chérie?” Static purred in the back of his throat. 

“Thank you, for…for all of this.”

He hummed in response, placing a gentle and quick kiss on the tip of your nose. “Anything for you, my doe.”

[howlsofbloodhounds]

I have been trying to read 'how nightmare became dadmare' on ao3 because a friend wanted me to since it's apparently the best found family bad sanses out there (I'm usually not a fan of the dynamic) and I've been struggling so much...

they keep ignoring killer. horror is barely a character, he's forgotten most of the time. at times I feel like the whole fic is more about dust than nightmare despite the title. I had to bail when nightmare literally ignored killer giving him vital information for no valid reason despite killer being his right hand man.

this is why I don't like the dynamic. every reason why. if this is the best out there I don't want to know what else they got going on.

sorry for the rant the frustration got to me

I feel it’s often very overlooked in the fandom that killer is not canonically nightmare’s right hand—it’s literally just him and nightmare, cross and xchara were there maybe before they ditched too and a murder sans variant showed up once and then kinda disappeared, killer refers to a mysterious “the others” at one point—but for the most part it’s just him and his boss.

And Nightmare definitely doesn’t listen to him or his advice—even if that comic suggests that perhaps that is something that would change with time, the more killer proves himself. Doesn’t mean he’s exempt from being choked unconscious if he speaks out of turn or has a slip in his words, however.

What im tryna say is that it’s pretty obvious that Killer would never become Nightmare’s right hand if he didn’t prove himself and earn it. Which means it’s absolutely ridiculous for killer to be nightmare’s right hand and then for nightmare to just disregard his advice—not unless that’s supposed to be a character flaw of his, his pride and hubris causing him to overlook killer again, maybe. Doesn’t seem to be the case in this fic though.

The idea that Killer becomes Nightmare’s right hand and that position holds weight only because Killer was there first or was there the longest..is just weird to me. That’s just bad leadership. Let Killer earn that spot through his own intelligence, determination, skills, and drive for either something new or control—through displays of dedication and loyalty.

Let him prove himself trustworthy and knowledgeable. Let Nightmare train him and encourage him, let Nightmare reward him for the effort and dedication he has shown to the King’s goals. It’s a lot more interesting than…”Well, he was here the longest..” or “he was here first,” in situations where these ranks are supposed to mean something. Or at least, if it means something to Killer.

Why would he ever leave Nightmare when he’s done and said so much to earn what he has? Searching for something new, the means and privilege and resources to follow wherever his curiosity and impulses and boredom take him? To have control and power over something in his life, for once? To ensure his own safety, security and survival?

Wouldn’t it be so much harder to give up what he has when he’s fought tooth and nail, killed and tortured, threw others under the bus—for his own self preservation— not wanting to be outdone by anyone else and thus deemed useless enough to not warrant keeping around, to be deemed worthless enough to have his right to exist revoked—for it? His own curiosity? Amusement? Feeling of control, even if it’s all ultimately meaningless in the end?

People should let killer be ruthless more often. Even if it means wielding cruelty as a tool.

But yeah, a lot of bad sans family fics have the misfortune of turning into the dust sans and nightmare sans show ft. those two other guys over there ig. I was reading that fic like awhile back, but I stopped a while ago, so I don’t know how it ends or goes on—so I can’t say anything about this fic specifically when I can’t recall anything about it rn.

[purple-paige-purple]

my main pazzi evidence!

hey guys, people have been asking me to give me reasoning as to why i think pazzi is real so here ya go. there is A LOT more i could say and a ton more evidence but imma try to piece my basic thoughts together explain as much as i can consicely.

1. their general vibe

ok lemme say first of all, the thing that pisses me off most about pazzi deniers is that they dont acknowledge hard evidence. like hand placement, eye contact, the "is it spit" video, etc. but the thing that's the absolute kicker to me is their entire vibe around each other.

i think the animal letter/pillow video is a really good example of this. start by imagining how you would play that game with your friends, even your closest friends of ten years. would you giggle at them and smile at them the way that p + a look at/talk to each other? probably not. (and if you do, babes im gonna hold your hand when i tell you this...) the entire video was just not something you'd expect from friends AT ALL.

also. the way paige's ENTIRE demeanor changes near azzi. duuuuude its so adorable. any time she's talking to azzi, and even sometimes when azzi is within earshot, paige's voice softens SUBSTANTIALLY and she becomes more thoughtful and calm. an example of this would be kk's (second) crumbl live in the bedroom, when azzi walks in and all of a sudden paige is now giggling quietly as opposed to cracking up loudly like she was before. i think its the whole "calming presence" idea and p + a really both are each other's anchor.

also u don't go on a cruise with your best friend and act the way they acted (and posted).

2. the hard evidence

the aforementioned "is it spit" video. like bro. no matter what the fuck azzi said, what paige responded was extremely suggestive, and azzi's reaction to it just proves that. paige we know that ur faggot ass's favorite tongue movement to lets just take a chill pill on live tv (jk pls dont stop keep feeding our delulu pazzi shipper asses)

another piece of hard evidence: "happy birthday to the precious princess 💗" OK PAIGE WE KNOW SHES UR WIFE. paige wanted to say "my precious princess" so bad its so obvious

paige and azzi also have not shut down ANY rumors or even spoken on the subject of their suspected relationship. instead, i would go so far as to say they've fed into it, the posts about each other, the continuous posting of the "💗" emoji even though the entire internet has a suspicion about what it means. this also ties into the fact that they do have social media, paige is active a lot, their teammates are active, and they definitely (no matter how) seeing these pazzi edits. they are OUT THERE and even the announcers know it.

ice and kk's faces whenever p + a are flirting got me ctfu every time. ice does not try to hide it AT ALL and even though i think kk tries, once in a while she makes a face (the interview where she is in the middle of them)

3. no other relationships/their dynamic

lets be generous to the deniers and say that they've only had smth (a relationship, whether it be serious or not) since 2021. they have not been with anyone since. i will say it again. they have not been with anyone since. with their popularity and how gorgeous/attractive they both are, i feel like if they were seen close with anyone, we would know about it. fine, someone could say they are just both locking in to school and bball, but i really just think p + a work so well together and basically have the same schedule so there is pretty much no negatives to them being together, therefore no reason why it would take away from school/bball. i think they are each other's person and really just compliment each other so well (opposites attract!)

basically the way they act is not how "just friends" act. i dont make the rules 🤷🏻‍♀️

ok so thats my basic thoughts. i could LITERALLY go on for pages (and i will if you guys want!) just let me know (send me an ask or smth) and ill make more posts with more evidence and just basically debriefing it. ok thank u girlypops for listening to my ted talk

ps. thank you to @elliesglock for debriefing some of the uconn lives, pls continue bc they are so fun to read and u have such good thoughts on everything!

[spittyfishy]

After the Darkest Day incident with Macro Cosmo Oleana needed to find a new job, and had all the qualifications for a management position in a different kinda shady highly influential conservation organization. Lucky for her after Faba’s demotion the Aether foundation had an opening!

I think Oleana’s awesome lol, definitely one of the stand out characters from Swsh, but the rest of Macro Cosmo was kinda underwhelming so I wanted to try putting her in a cooler evil team! I think she’d get along with Lusamine quite well, I’d love to see them girl bossing their way across the regions!

[lichenbug]

idk man i cant get over them

[shopwitchvamp]

Can't stop thinking about wanting to make a video game :[ Don't know how to make a video game :[[ Could I find the time and strength needed to learn? Perhaps. But something will have to give in return :\

[scandalousadventures]

It's been a little while since I've worked on dolls and I'm itching to get to it again... but I'm also tempted to just do some Monster High doll repaints 🤔

[piningpercussionist]

Template by @juni38

Im going to be completely frank with you all... and admit that I read these options and wasn't sure how to take this chart,,, so uh. Under the cut is Another Version. I'd apologize but I've given you the option to keep scrolling ¯\_(･･)_/¯

(If you notice characters missing on Kim's side, I probably figured she doesn't know who they are lol)

For the record,,, if they *wanted* me to pull their hair-- *is shot several times before I can continue*

Uhh Matthew is here because I have been converted fully on he/him or enby lesbian Matthew I think. He lives in my brain rent free now, very gender. I'd pull his hair but also I think he mostly just deserves to have it played with nicely.

And Scott's here because 1) I enjoy trans Scott, 2) Kim Pine Brain Rot possibly, 3) idk he's like,, the exception. God damnit, I've fallen for the inexplicable Scott Pilgrim Effect. What the fuck--

I did think about doing this chart like everyone was actually applicable to my tastes, but even if they were I think the ones I didn't put up would have to fall on the caress side bc I just don't feel that way abt them lol.

Again, not to say that's the case for the gals over on that side,,, I just think I would want to be gentle w them shxkdjsdhbd with the exception for Lynette who probably deserves to have her hair pulled, but again I fear she would Hurt Me,,, but maybe in a fun way,,,

Anyway No One Look At Me....

(,, also,,, Ramona is so far over bc I think she would enjoy it,, otherwise she'd be closer to Kim in that section. Same thing w Roxie)

If anyone actually looks at this version, I'm not opposed to doing a version like this for Kim btw! Just ask for it so I feel like I'm not just Dropping This and scurrying away

[eastofedean]

I have a very important question.

*it's an au where supernatural things don't exist. sam still went to stanford, leaving Dean alone with his dad tho. cas is human (obviously).

*¹ sam leaves stanford, leaving dean alone with john. he still hunts the supernatural. cas is an angel.

[feel free to leave other ideas in the tags/comments!]

[eywaseclipse]

Craving spring so bad right now!!

Lemon sugar cookies

Lilac perfume

Long walks after it rains and smelling the petrichor aroma

Spring minestrone soup

Split pea risotto

Spring sunsets

Watching Pride and prejudice

Chamomile tea

Ugh. I miss it so much. Need a spring countryside getaway to heal me right now

[aritany]

i’m beginning to think there’s a kind of indestructibility that comes with the territory of your first heartbreak being from your parents.

like, what are you going to do to hurt me? my superheroes chose religion over me. good try though

[youareapipedream]

Aaron and Andrew

Here is a sort of guide to the twins pasts and how they met, and their relationship with each other throughout the years.

(I really hope this makes sense, do let me know if anything is confusing)

When they were separated 

Tilda Minyard became pregnant after what Nicky believes is a one night stand. Once the twins were born, Tilda gave them both up to foster care a few days after they were born. Consumed by the guilt of giving her children up, she returned to the system and decided to take only one of them back. The one she chose wound up being Aaron. 

Due to the fact that Tilda didn’t register the twins under a last name, Andrew wound up staying in the foster system under the name 

“Andrew Doe” and bounced from family to family, none of them good, until he was thirteen. At this time, he moved in with the Spears. Cass and Richard Spear were the first family Andrew truly felt a connection to, more so Cass than Richard. Cass wanted to adopt Andrew, and he wanted to let her. 

The problem was, the Spear’s biological son, Drake, started to sexually abuse Andrew. Andrew finally felt like he had a real family, a real mother, in Cass. Drake was graduating soon and he wanted to join the army right out of high school. Andrew thought that if he could last until Drake graduated, then he could have the mother he wanted and wouldn’t have to give her up because of Drake’s abuse. 

Then, Officer Higgins from Oakland PD, who knew Andrew, saw Aaron who was with his mother and her boyfriend at a football game. Higgins believed Tilda was another foster parent and that the twins got separated in the system. 

Higgins convinced Tilda to give him her number so he could give it to Cass Spear. She did, likely out of embarrassment and received a call the next day. Tilda told Cass that she wanted nothing to do with Andrew. Aaron, aware of what the call was about, listened on the home phone upstairs. He heard Tilda say that she didn’t want Aaron to meet Andrew. Aaron had a huge fight with Tilda but she wouldn’t budge, so Aaron went behind her back and contacted the Oakland PD. Aaron told them to give his information to Andrew’s foster family. Two weeks after, Aaron got a letter from Andrew telling him that he wanted nothing to do with Aaron, and to leave him alone. 

While Aaron was trying to convince Andrew to meet him, so was Drake. Drake harassed Andrew, trying to get him to agree to meet Aaron. This was the reason Andrew refused to do it. Andrew didn’t care what happened to him at the hands of Drake, but he didn’t want anyone else to deal with it, especially the brother he’s never met. Cass convinced Aaron to try again later, and he was going to but he waited too long. Andrew decided to get himself locked up in a juvenile facility to escape Drake’s abuse. Juvie is where Andrew learned to play Exy, 

With their mother

About two months after all of this happened, Tilda took Aaron and moved him to Columbia. Once Luther, Tilda’s brother and Nicky’s father, found out about Andrew, he went to interview Andrew’s foster family. A month later, Luther flew himself and Aaron out to California to see Andrew. Aaron picked up Exy in school as a way to get out of the house for a few extra hours to escape Tilda’s abuse. 

Andrew noticed something was wrong and didn’t believe that the bruises came from Exy, and so he did everything in his power to get out. A year after this first short visit, Andrew got released from Juvie on good behavior, and put on probation. Luther managed to convince Tilda to take him in and so Andrew moved to Columbia. Andrew found out that Tilda has gotten Aaron addicted to drugs. 

Andrew didn’t like Tilda, and made that very clear, but he and Aaron had a cautious, but somewhat friendly relationship. Andrew and Aaron made a deal, Andrew would stick with Aaron until high school graduation, and protect him from women who wanted to hurt him, on the condition that Aaron ice out anyone else. Andrew initially did this to get Aaron to stop seeing the friends who enabled his addiction. Aaron, even with the deal in place, tried to make friends and even date a few girls. One night, Andrew pretended to be Aaron and got into a fight with Tilda. Andrew made it to Luther’s house, which is how the Hemmicks found out about Tilda’s abuse. Luther called Tilda to talk but she took Andrew and left. 

It’s uncertain what exactly happened to cause the car to crash, Nicky thought maybe Tilda panicked when she realized it wasn’t Aaron in the car, or Andrew did it on purpose, or if they were fighting. It is later implied by Andrew that he staged the entire accident, yet what exactly happened that caused the crash is still not known. Tilda wasn’t wearing her seatbelt and died during the accident. 

Aaron believes that Andrew killed Tilda because she left him in the foster care system. Andrew says that he killed Tilda because she hurt Aaron. Tilda’s death destroyed the fledgling relationship between the twins. 

With Nicky 

Nicky Hemmick was in Germany when he found out about his Aunt Tilda’s death and when he came back to the states for her funeral, he was told that his father was planning to take in the twins. Nicky was miserable when he lived with his parents and didn’t want the twins to have to deal with what he went through so Nicky became their legal guardians. They got a house in Columbia and the first thing Andrew did was stock the upstairs bathroom with canned food and other supplies and lock Aaron in it, forcing him through withdrawal. Nicky got a job at the restaurant Sweeties where he and the twins were introduced to a non-addictive drug called “cracker dust” to try and help Aaron with his addiction. He found out from customers about Eden’s Twilight and got a job there by befriending one of the bartenders, Roland. Eventually he got both of the twins part time jobs at the club. 

Medication

Two years before the start of The Foxhole Court, Nicky was attacked outside of Eden’s Twilight by four men because of his sexuality. Andrew stepped in and nearly beat all four of them to death. The courts rules that the violence took a step too far past self defense and Andrew’s lawyer managed to convince them to have Andrew engage in intensive counseling and be medicated for three years  instead of going to prison. 

With the Foxes

Andrew was scouted by Edgar Allen University, with Kevin and Riko, but he turned them down and nearly immediately signed with the Palmetto State Foxes. He signed with the Foxes because Coach Wymack was willing to sign his brother and cousin as well as let Andrew come off his medication for Exy games. All three joined the team. 

During the series, the twins rarely interact with each other unless they have to, showing a distant and oftentimes cold relationship. Aaron blames Andrew for Tilda’s death, and Andrew refuses to apologize for keeping his end of the deal they made, even if Aaron won’t. 

In The Raven King, while Nicky is trying to reconnect with his parents, Drake is waiting upstairs and attacks Andrew. Neil notices something is wrong and takes Aaron upstairs to help Andrew. Upon seeing what was happening, Aaron murders Drake to help Andrew. After the attack, the decision is made to send Andrew to rehab to get him off of his mood altering medication. He comes back and seems even more uninterested in his brother than usual. 

During The King’s Men, Neil manipulates Katelyn, Aarons girlfriend into shutting him out until the twins go to counseling together. Eventually, they do start going and attempting to work out some of their issues. Later in the book, Aaron uses their deal against Andrew, if Aaron can’t have a relationship with Katelyn because of their deal, then technically Andrew was breaking their deal by doing what he was doing with Neil. Andrew angrily and reluctantly agrees to end the deal with Aaron and confronts Katelyn in the library where he tells her that even though he is allowing her to see Aaron, that doesn’t mean he approves of or likes her. He tells her to stay away from him. Aaron and Neil end up switching rooms, Neil moving in with Kevin, Nicky, and Andrew, and Aaron moving in with Matt. 

After the books 

The twin’s relationship improves slowly over time, but eventually they acknowledge each other outside of the counseling sessions. According to a post from Nora’s Twitter, after the twins graduate and figure out they have to leave each other “Aaron catches hold of Andrew and Andrew is the last to let go.” After graduation, Aaron proposes to Katelyn right before his fifth year at Palmetto and they get married shortly after graduation. Neil manages to convince Andrew to go to the wedding but it takes two separate favors to do so, one to get Andrew to go and the other to make sure Andrew doesn’t threaten Katelyn. Aaron and Katelyn move to Chicago after graduating from Medical school and decide not to have children because of their busy careers and general disinterest in having any. Andrew lives with Neil and they adopt two cats while having successful professional Exy careers.