#if anyone has any ideas on how to make this look more like grian

[mike-smh]

Chat, I have a lot of opinions on the hermitcraft fandom, specifically a lot of common headcanons or AU’s people have. So if you don’t wanna read them that’s fine this is just me rambling lol.

Grian

Grian is constantly portrayed as an innocent little guy who only ever did the bad things because he was possessed by watchers. I hate this because so many people infantilize him in order to make him look more innocent. He is a fully grown man with a wife. He is probably twice the age of the people who write him in this way.

I have three major issues with this. Firstly, he can’t be possessed by a watcher since within canon the watchers are just the audience. I know that in some people’s AU’s the watchers are godlike entities who can do possessions and control people. But if that’s true then why would they control Grian specifically and make just him innocent and make everyone else the bad guys.

Secondly, it’s unfair to ignore every single action he’s done that has hurt people. It’s unfair to force everyone to forgive him just because he “wasn’t in control”, possessed or not he still hurt people in so many ways. Everyone he hurt has a right to be angry with him even if he was possessed because he still hurt them.

Lastly, Grian absolutely knows what he’s doing, because he pulls pranks on hermitcraft that are a lot like the things he’s done in the life series. And canonically watchers aren’t on hermitcraft because they simply don’t exist there. People make AU’s where they do exist on hermitcraft which is whatever but still. Grian is still in control of himself when he does bad things, he is self aware and has made multiple points of being self aware when he has done harmful things to people.

Scar

I have so many complaints about fanon Scar. A lot of people also infantilize him and never acknowledge the fact he’s in fact manipulative, cunning, deceitful and a villian. People really only portray him as someone who’s in love with Grian and will just be a punching bag for the other life series members as if he doesn’t know how to stand up for himself.

I actually have five main points about Scar because although Fanon Grian is something I'm also passionate about, the fandom just does Scar dirty and completely changes him into someone unrecognizable.

So, firstly, I hate that the fandom makes Scar into a man who doesn’t know how to stand up for himself. They constantly portray him as someone who’s a people pleaser and just does whatever anyone wants. They turn him into a doormat and punching bag when in actuality he is very much the opposite. Scar is manipulative, he never says no to an idea if he doesn’t want to do it. He has many canon kills, there’s times where he’s killed people when he didn’t even need to, he did it just for fun. Or during 3rd life when he made Bdubs and Grian fight for their lives.

Many people make the excuse that he only did that because he was a red life but that doesn’t make sense because he’s done that on hermitcraft too. His persona Hotguy is literally a hero that kills whoever he wants, he just shoots people at any time and kills them. Also during season five, when Convex originated, he constantly killed others for his entertainment. And again, people make the excuse that he was controlled by the Vexes. Okay, that’s a valid argument, except when you remember he was a corrupt mayor in season seven. He was a swindler in season eight where he took everyone’s money so that they actually got a chance to live through the moon crashing and he helped King Ren in season nine.

Another point is that people make him way too forgiving. Especially towards Grian and everything Grian has done to him. When he has literally, on multiple occasions, referenced bitterly to all the things Grian’s done to him. He’s known to hold grudges against people in both hermitcraft and in the life series. It makes absolutely no sense to make him a constantly forgiving person, that is unless he is nothing but a love interest for Grian. So many people infantilize Scar just so that they can justify shipping Scarian, because they know that if they took all the canon information at face value that Scarian would never be a healthy relationship.

Taking that into account leads us to our next topic, people like to completely disregard any personality Scar has in favor of just making him into a shipping vessel for Scarian. Some people make his entire personality into just liking Grian. People like to make him forgive Grian for everything he’s done, even him cheating on Scar during Double Life, just because they like the ship. And honestly, it grosses me out. Seeing people completely disregard how toxic Grian and Scars relationship actually is and change them both into characters completely unrecognizable from canon just so they can have their ship.

I’m sure there’s so much more I can complain about when it comes to Fanon Scar but I’ll make just one last point. His disability. I’ve seen a lot of people make Scars personality revolve around his disability. People essentially making fun of him in a way, making him stutter every sentence, unable to read properly, constantly bringing up how he can’t walk, etc. Now, as a disabled person these inherently aren’t bad things, there’s nothing wrong with bringing these things up and talking about them. It’s just how you talk and bring them up is what’s important, some people talk about it in a way to mock him.

Making him the butt of the joke because he can’t pronounce somethings properly, mocking him because he struggles with reading. Which in my opinion, is disgusting. Yes the cc makes jokes like this with the other hermits, but the other hermits are his friends. You, as a viewer, are not his friend, you don’t know him and you don’t know if he’s hurt by random strangers making fun of him for things he cannot control and making his disabilities his entire personality.

Mumbo

Mumbo. My man, Mumbo K. Jumbo, the Redstone innovator, the man who made a house that can walk. What I’ve noticed about him is that he gets so watered down in Fanon, I swear people just don’t want to give him an ounce of personality. So I will be talking in detail about that.

First of all, people make his entire personality just being a silly guy, they give him no strengths, no weaknesses, they just make him an NPC I swear. They make him act all timid and clueless like he doesn’t know how to do anything at all, they make him helpless. When he literally isn’t, he’s just as villainous as anyone else. He does what he wants to, he kills who he wants to, he threatens people, he literally blew up his entire base just because he wanted to.

Second of all, I swear that it always somehow circles back to Grian, and I despise that. Because for some reason people again, forget everything toxic thing he and Grian have done and just ship them and make Mumbo into nothing but a love interest for Grian. It’s just so disappointing to see people give absolutely none of the other hermits any personality.

Third of all, Mumbo has pulled pranks with the intention of killing people. He constantly kills his friends or messes with them in ways to harm them or greatly annoy them. He constantly stands up for himself in situations and he manipulates people whenever he wants something. He is so much more than being a “spoon”, he is so much more than just being a silly guy who stresses over redstone. He’s not even just a redstoner, he’s a builder too but it seems that people also disregard that part of him as well because it just doesn’t fit into the vision of him being helpless.

So, in conclusion, people like making everything about Grian, people like making everything revolve around Grian. Scars personality? Changed and watered down so that people can have a “healthy” desert duo. Mumbo’s personality? Changed and watered down so Grian can have someone who supports him and constantly forgives him for all of the literal crimes he commits.

So, you might be asking, “Narrator, what’s the point of this? Why did you spend an hour writing about fully grown men who play Minecraft for a living?” Because I’m sick of seeing fully grown men being infantilized for a bunch of teens' enjoyment. Just so they can ship them together and make their favorite character (commonly Grian) be a better person and actually likable.

So what’s the point you ask? The point is that I fucking hate some of the hermitcraft fandom, specifically the people who don’t like people who don’t share the same opinions and or do any of the things I’ve listed. I’m not saying the people who do these things are bad people, just that I personally dislike them. In no way am I hating on the people, just the headcanons.

Okay yeah, I just realized I spent an entire hour of my life writing this and that’s an hour of my life I can never get back…

Also if I offended you, I don’t actually feel bad because I'm allowed to have opinions and so are you. By voicing your opinions you’re opening yourself up to criticism because not everyone agrees. And I know that, that’s why this is all in a first person perspective, these are my opinions and feel free to disagree all you want. I just don’t really care if you disagree lol

Anyway thanks for reading.

[hottubsandwiches]

kind of an abstract grian design i came up with earlier this week !!

was going for a desert/sun god vibe, the light of the server if you will 🤯🤯 idk if it even looks like grian anymore though oops

[rosenbergamot]

Everyone is Trans???? (REAL NOT CLICKBAIT!!!)

Grian is the only trans person on Hermitcraft.

He knows this as a complete and utter fact. He’s not lying about this, no matter how much he wishes he was-- and goodness, does he wish he was every damn day of his life. It’s lonely to be the only trans person on a server full of your dearest companions. 

It’s not even a horrible thing. He doesn’t trust them any less, doesn’t love them any less, but he sure is peeved about being surrounded by cis people all the time. When he wants to talk about his hips looking too wide today, or his top surgery scars not sitting right enough for him, or the way he’s so happy he can finally grow something of a beard, or how having long hair has gone from something dysphoric to something euphoric for him-- he just can’t! 

Because they won’t understand! And, sure, of course he can just tell them because they’re his friends and they care about him, but sometimes he doesn’t want to just be cared about. Sometimes he wants to be understood. Sometimes he doesn’t want to have to explain everything, going through the same tiring motions he’s gone over time and time again in his life. 

Can a guy not just want another trans person to complain to? Is it really so hard for that to be his reality? Is it really so much to ask?

He’s having a particularly annoying day today. His stupid jeans aren’t fitting correctly on his hips. Usually he’s not too angry about it. On days where he feels more feminine he likes that he has these hips, revels in the way clothes hug his curves, but right now he’s feeling just about as Man as one possibly could, and it’s making him want to rip apart his clothes because none of them fit right. 

He ends up in a pair of sweatpants that hide enough of himself so that he’s able to leave his base. The day outside is warmer than expected, beautiful and sunny, and he immediately regrets the large sweater and comfy sweatpants he had chosen to wear. The light glints off of the ocean, teasing him with its deep secrets that he will never be able to decipher. 

In the distance he can see the newest addition to Scar’s train-- the big snail that those pesky snails had built. It worries him that they can build things all of a sudden. Still, it’s not like he can do anything about it. You just have to accept that they’re going to do whatever they please and then they’ll tone it down. It seems they like to cause mayhem. He can’t really knock them for that. 

He unhooks Pluto from the post. He runs his hands through his mane, reveling in the coarse feeling. It takes his mind away from his body for a few seconds, lets him be completely and utterly still in a way that he often isn’t. Being so detail oriented and such a perfectionist can be hard on the psyche sometimes, especially when that energy is directed towards your body. 

You might as well roll his boulder and call him Sisyphus because he’s… uh…

He’s having a rough go at it. 

Pluto whinnies as he stops petting him, nudges his hand with his snout. It’s time to go check the shopping district. Maybe do permit things. Ugh. 

The ride is uneventful. He smashes the glass to the permit office with his pickaxe, picks it back up and replaces it so that nobody gets any funny ideas. Don’t want them bothering him or anything of the sorts when he’s here. Having to work is his worst nightmare.

The office is as quiet as it is dark. He sighs so loud it fills up the space. He freshens up the light, makes sure that the sign telling people the door is out of order is in place, and then moves behind the filing cabinets, taking a look at his uniform that sits there.

Usually he likes how it fits. It’s tight, accentuating his flat chest and his curves. He likes it that way. Not today though. 

Today he’ll forgo the outfit. It’s not like anyone is going to come in, anyways.

--

Twenty minutes later and he was very wrong. Someone is digging underneath the building, muttering to themselves, and Grian guesses who it is before he even pops his head in. 

Of course Scar of all people needs help with permits today. He’s always looking for any chance he gets to bother Grian into doing work. He puts down his book, eyes him with an anger that he knows feels inappropriate even for him. Sue him, he’s having a bad day.

“Grian!” Scar’s voice is louder than he remembered. He’s got specks of dirt on his face. 

He shoves his shovel into the dirt, leans on it, falls over a little bit as it teeters, tries to right himself, ends up just knocking the shovel over instead, stands up straight, puts his hands behind his back. Stops. Coughs. Smiles. Continues yapping.

“It’s so lovely to see you here! It’s such a coinkidink that fate would put the both of us here! In the permit office! At the same time! Almost as if we’re destined to meet here and do paperwork together and-- and help me with my permit so that I can actually do something as a zoo keeper…” His voice is quieter at the end. Grian pretends not to hear it. 

“Scar.” He greets flatly. “What do you want?” 

Disregarding his ire, Scar saunters up to him. “Oh, well, nothing too bad, G, nothing at all! I wouldn’t dream of making you work or anything-- um…” He stops suddenly. He opens his mouth. He closes it, looking him up and down. If a visual question mark could appear over a person’s head, it absolutely would in this moment. “You’re not dressed up in your-- your little… office uniform! Your little suit! Where’s your clip-on tie, Grian?”

Ugh. “Office Grian is out of the building today.”

That does not do anything to quell Scar’s confusion. His big ol’ eyes look wet and pathetic as he stares at him. “B-B-B-B-But… how am I supposed to get help with my form if office Grian isn’t here?”

“You’re just gonna have to deal with good ol’ regular Grian today.” 

He loves Scar beyond words-- really, it drains him how much he loves this man-- but today is not the day for him. He can feel his energy departing out of his body already. He was going to try and stick it out for a while today. It looks like plans are changing swiftly.

“Is regular Grian as know-- legible. Knoll… knowledge…” He hums, goes down a different path. “Do you know how to do the form? Because I need some serious help, G.” 

He drags a hand down his face. It’s sweaty. “Office Grian doesn’t even know how to do the form, Scar.” 

“What?!” This is genuine surprise from him. “So you’re tellin’ me that this form is all… all…”

“Bullshit?” He finishes the sentence for him. “Yeah. Pretty much.” His head is starting to hurt. “Ugh. Look, Scar, I’m not feeling good today, so maybe we can leave this for another day?”

The humour drops from Scar’s face. It leaves genuine concern. “Yeah-- I mean, no worries. Of course. Of course! Do you… uh, do you need-- need anything? Want to… talk about it?” 

It’s tentative. An olive branch. Scar is a very kind guy. A genuinely nice person. He thinks he’s perhaps caught him off guard with how open he’s being right now. It leaves him quiet and thoughtful. 

When the smile is off of Scar’s face one can really appreciate the way he looks. It’s not like his smile isn’t beautiful-- because it is, it’s moreso that this stillness is rare for him, moments of calm few and far between his cheesy one-liners and fake grins, and so when one is awarded this sight it feels disarming. 

He often forgets how beautiful Scar is. He thinks about how handsome he is on the daily, a fact which he divulges to nobody but himself, achingly aware of it everytime he sees him. Yet he misses how pretty he is. It makes his heart hurt.  

“Um.” He says as he snaps himself out of his… state. With nothing else to say, he just goes, “okay?” Y’know, like someone who wasn’t just staring deep into their friend’s eyes and remarking on how gorgeous they are. Like a smart and normal person. He grins to try and make it look extra convincing.

Scar’s face immediately screws up into worry. It was not convincing. 

“Ohhhh, god. Who are you and what have you done with Grian? I-I-I-I’m scared! You actually want to talk about it? What kind of sorcery is this?”

The bit of humour grounds him. He snorts. “Scar, don’t make me regret my choice.”

That shocks him into movement. His friend’s head whips around, eyes looking for something. He runs around the office wildly, tripping over his untied shoelaces, ignoring his squawk of “tie your shoes Scar!”, and comes back with two chairs. He sets them down in front of the desk, patting the other one. When Grian doesn’t move he pats it again, more insistent. Finally he acquiesces, leaving the comfort of the desk and sitting across from Scar. 

“So!” His voice is far too cheery. His smile is straining at the edges. He’s out of his element right now, Grian realizes. And it’s because he always has to fight to get these talks out of Grian. It’s like pulling tooth and nail sometimes. And here he is, just ready to… to bare it all. 

Oh, god. He’s going to talk to him. About his problems. And his body. 

He suddenly feels sick.

“I think I may throw up.” 

Scar’s smile falls. “What?” 

He splays his upper body across the desk. His stomach is doing flips. “This. This is going to kill me, Scar. Do you understand?” 

“N-No?” 

“I am going to die a painful death, Scar, and it’s all because you made me talk about my… my feelings!” He makes a throwing up sound. 

“Now you-- you just wait a second, mister!” Scar leans forward so that he can poke him in the shoulder. “I didn’t make you do anything-- in fact you agreed to it! So let me hear it, Gri, or I-I swear I’m gonna… I’m gonna! I’m gonna send those stupid snails back over to you and make them eat your mending book right in front of your eyes!”

He gasps. “You wouldn’t.”

An mhm. A nod. “Ohhh, I would. Don’t you test me now!” 

He’s seen enough fish in the short span they’ve been in this season to know that, in his shock, his mouth is opening and closing like one. It takes all his resolve to not run out of the building and leave this stupid place behind. Sure, Scar may try and follow him, but he’s fast-- surely he can outrun him! It… it wouldn’t be too hard! He can do it!

The energy leaves him in one fell swoop as the silence drags on and Scar only seems to get more worried about him. Finally, he looks away.

“I feel alone…” he bites out. It’s like chewing glass. 

“Oh?” Scar is interested. That’s him telling him to continue. 

The proverbial glass on his tongue and teeth cut up his mouth and bleed the truth out of him. “I have… a particular problem that nobody else on the server can relate to.”

“Is it an avian thing?” He scratches his head. “Y’know, I know that Pearl isn’t exactly an avian herself, but she may be able to help you out. Or-- hey! Jimmy is an avian! We can message him?” 

He’s earnest. So earnest. He grits his teeth. “It’s not. An avian thing.” 

That makes Scar stop. “Is it… is it a them thing?”

Them. Neither of them need to say their names to know. 

“God-- no. No. Thank goodness.” In his stress, he begins to pull at his hair, his wings ruffling. “I just. God. Scar, I can’t believe you don’t know. We’ve spent…” lives together. Lived and died together. Stuck by each other’s sides when no one else would. Hurt each other but mostly just loved each other. “We’ve spent time together.” 

“We sure have! I-- I, uh… I don’t know what you’re talking about, though.” 

“Have you ever looked at me when I’m shirtless?” He just decides to bite the bullet. 

Scar’s jaw drops. His face begins to turn a shade of red he didn’t think was possible. He looks away, fiddling with the brim of his hat. “No, no-- no! No way. Noooo way. Never, G-- never! I would. Never.” 

“Why are you so--? Look, nevermind! Scar, I-I’m different from everyone else and it’s not because of them and it’s not because I’m an avian.”

“You’re gonna have to spell it out for me.” He’s still not looking at him. Did that really embarrass him so much? That… that means many things that he just does not have the brain to dissect right now. 

“I’m not cis.” Is all he can really say. 

It’s so silent you can hear a pin drop. 

“You’re…” Scar’s finger wobbles as he points at him. His jaw is back to being on the fucking floor. 

For a second, Grian thinks he’s just fucked up the entire thing they have going on. Scar is going to leave him. He’s going to hate him and he’s going to tell everyone and it’s going to ruin his life. Poppies and lilacs will mean nothing to them anymore. 

But then Scar starts to smile. He wiggles his fingers, bouncing in his seat. “Ooooh, Grian! Grian, I had no idea! What the heck?” His laugh is a little intense considering the information just given. Dread leaks out of his body and is replaced by confusion. Scar is still laughing. “What the heck?! You mean to tell me we could have been bondin’ even more? How-- how the heck did I not notice that?”

“What…?” His voice cracks. 

Firmly, Scar points at him. “Hold on, how the heck did you not notice this?!” He points to his own chest.

“Scar, what on Earth are you talking about?” 

With little care for much of… anything, really, Scar rips his own shirt open, the buttons flying off and skittering across the floor. He points aggressively at two thick scars underneath his pecs. They pucker at the end, pulling skin taut against his ribs. He’d recognize something like that anywhere. 

It’s Grian’s turn for his jaw to drop. “W-What? You… wait-- what? You… I-- Scar, put your shirt back on!” 

“The shirt is gone, Grian,” he says with faux seriousness. “You’re just gonna have to deal with this right now.”

He’s trying very hard not to stare at Scar’s chest. He is fighting a losing battle. 

“Nevermind that, though-- how the heck did you not notice these scars? They’re gigantic, Grian! Biggest ones I’ve got on my-- my whole… whole area!” He gestures vaguely to his body.

“Your torso?” He sighs. “I don’t know, Scar, I guess I don’t make it a habit to look at your pecs?”

That answer seems to displease him greatly. “Well, I can’t see why not, my pecs are amayzin’.” 

You know what… “Sure, Scar. Sure they are.” 

He beams at him. “You’re welcome to stare at them anytime, Grian!”

His ears are getting warm. Stupid Scar. “It’s nice to know I’m not alone on here.”

To Scar this seems like a joke. He laughs. When Grian doesn’t laugh too, he stops. Stares at him. Squints at him. “You-- you weren’t ever alone, Grian.”

“I didn’t know that you were also trans!” He argues, feeling his back start to rise. 

“No-- no, I mean… jeez, Grian, I don’t think I know a single cis person on this server. In fact, MIster, I thought you were the only one we had-- until now, of course!” 

“What.” 

“Actually I think Skizzy Wizzy is cis! Or-- or maybe he’s not…” He furrows his brows. “Ah, whatever, point is: you’re surrounded by trans people whether you like it or not, mister!”

“Why would I dislike it?” It still doesn’t feel real to him. If he weren’t sitting down he would have to sit down again. As it stands (or sits, he supposes) he just sinks lower into his chair. “I can’t believe this. I’ve been-- I’ve been stewing for years! Wait-- Mumbo?!”

“Yep!” He pops the ‘p’, grinning wildly. It makes Grian start to laugh. That makes Scar start to laugh. In a very sweet moment that turns very sobering very quickly, Scar takes his hand, squeezes it as if he’s squeezing one of those grip testing machines-- ow! “Now you don’t have to hide it, G. Isn’t that amayzin’?” 

The contact makes his head start to spin. “You’re crushing my hand, Scar.”

“Whoops!” He lets go, blushing. “Sorry, sometimes I don’t even know my own strength!” 

“Yeah, yeah… anyways, what was that about you definitely not staring at my chest earlier?”

Scar runs out of the building so fast you would swear he had somewhere to be. 

Which is good enough for Grian, because that means he doesn’t have to put an ounce of work in today! He puts down his ‘Gone Fishin’ sign, repairs the hole left by Scar, and then leaves the building. He feels lighter than he’s ever felt before.

So it turns out he was wrong. He’s never been so glad to be so wrong. 

(read it on ao3 here! <3)

[frozenjokes]

CuteGuy Would Prefer Greatly If HotGuy Never Ever Had Any Nice Things, But Especially Not His Good Friend And Roommate Cubfan135 (1/3)

I absolutely refuse to go through an add italics to the tumblr versions of my fics but grian is so angry all of the time it was necessary in this case

next

“So let me get this straight.” Grian, well, CuteGuy stood over HotGuy, the hero’s head pinned under his own boot. It was times like these that Grian considered ditching the boots altogether; wrapping his talons around any hero’s face like this would be an absolute sight, but alas, he wasn’t trying to get painful calluses all over his feet. Grian was sure HotGuy could escape this if he wanted to; he’d just have to roll to knock Grian off, but he stayed still, staring up at Grian with those big, pathetic eyes. “You want my help with your romantic endeavors. You want to pretend fight so you can pretend win, yeah? Impress that special someone?”

Grian knew who it was, of course. Not because HotGuy announced it or because it was on the news, no, but because this certified idiot had set his sights on Cub. Cub! His roommate Cub. What could HotGuy even want from a guy like Cub- just a guy! A human, not even a conventionally attractive human, who hardly knew anything about heroes and villains other than their names! Cub, who worked a shitty job with a shitty manager, who basically did nothing but go on little walks and hang out at home- there was nothing about Cub that stood out, so why in the fuck was HotGuy so- Grian hissed, pressing a little harder on HotGuy’s head, who grunted. HotGuy didn’t get to have Cub. Cub wasn’t- HotGuy didn’t even know him! He didn’t get to take Cub- his Cub- and turn him into some kind of hero worshiper!

“Stop looking at me like that!” Grian’s anger reached its boiling point, though HotGuy didn’t flinch, looking more disappointed than anything.

To his credit, he did look away, pursing his lips, “So I take it you’re not a fan of the idea.” The infuriating amicable lilt to his voice stayed even despite his face being crushed against the pavement, and Grian wanted nothing more than to choke it out of him.

“What gave you that idea?” Grian snarled, and HotGuy shrugged.

“When you’re really pissed off you start drooling, and honestly, it’s quite gross. Are you stressed? Have you considered Xanax? Does wonders for me on bad days.”

“My insurance won’t renew my prescription and my doctor fucking sucks.”

“Ah, I feel you buddy. I mean, I basically live in a hospital, but sometimes I need some more benign stuff and it just feels like the whole system is out to get you! Don’t even get me started on before I got into the hero business, gosh. Well, if it makes you feel any better, you were far from my first choice. I asked The Goat, but he told me that would be a monumental waste of his time, Mumbo told me he wouldn’t be convincing enough and also to stop calling him he’s retired, I haven’t seen Worm Man for years but I’m still looking-“

“How many people did you ask before me?” Grian tried not to be offended, but honestly, he was very offended- HotGuy has the gall to ask favors then admit Grian wasn’t his first choice? Why not? He knew why. But why not???

“Anyone I could find, really. I mean, heroes are easy enough to track down, but a lot of them are busy and also don’t give a fuck, but villains kinda just wander around and cause problems wherever. Though, I figured if I stood here long enough you’d jump me like you did last time. Hey, by the way, if you see Poultry Man, will you tell him I’d like to talk?”

Grian seethed; he had seen HotGuy up on the apartment complex where they had fought last and assumed he was looking for Cub- was Grian really that predictable?

“The last thing Poultry Man would want to do is help you impress some guy you don’t even know- what’s the deal anyway? Don’t answer that, I don’t care.”

“Hey! I know Cub plenty! We had such a nice walk the night you broke my visor and then a lovely lunch date the next day! Well- maybe not a date. I don’t know, I never asked what he thought. I kind of don’t want to know, though. And I wasn’t going to ask Poultry Man to help me do anything, I just wanted to talk to him about all the chickens he released into the poor woman’s home- it’s not important-“

“Poor woman? She’s a fucking asshole.”

“It’s not important,” Scar strained, and Grian felt the tiniest bit vindicated, “All I meant to say is that I would feel bad beating the shit out of Poultry Man, even if it was just pretend. He’s just a misguided guy in a chicken costume.

“Misguided?” Grian’s hiss cracked into a higher pitch, “Poultry Man is EVIL. Poultry Man could CRUSH YOU. What makes you think you’re any match against him, huh? Really.”

“I mean, his costume looks a bit bulky, not great for maneuvering. I doubt he can see very well out of the mask, too. I don’t know, maybe he’s like, secretly ripped or something, but I still don’t think he could do much damage.”

“You’ll regret underestimating him when you’re taking your last breaths under his claws.”

“Oh, I hope not! I just wanted to chat about where he got those chickens, but you’re nice for standing up for him! You’re a good friend, CuteGuy.”

“I-“ Grian felt his body short circuit for a moment, everything replaced with the type of fury that can only be released by picking someone up and violently shaking them. HotGuy was perfectly polite about it, enduring Grian’s fit of rage before hanging somewhat limply in his arms, not even using his own legs to stand after Grian was done. HotGuy stared. Grian stared back.

“You’re strong.”

“Fuck you.” Grian dropped HotGuy, who just collapsed, wholly unready to support his own weight. Fine. Good. With a few strong beats of his wings, Grian took off, leaving HotGuy firmly in the dust. Flying was good and the evening breeze was good and if shaking someone annoying wasn’t enough to make them stop being annoying, then it was time to let it go. Something Grian was famously bad at.

When he looked back HotGuy was still just laying there, INFURIATINGLY, just staring at the sky! He wasn’t even looking at Grian, he was just completely zoned out-! What was his damn problem?

Grian’s boots cracked against the cement on either side of HotGuy’s waist, and HotGuy screamed, so genuinely frightened, Grian was pretty sure the noise would color his memory for the rest of his life. “Where are you meeting him?”

“What?” HotGuy squeaked, and the sound was just as beautiful.

“Where do you want me to be for your stunt?”

“I-I was going to meet Cub at the City Park-“

“Are you crazy? Are you trying to get me arrested? You’ll meet here, in the parking lot across the street at 9:00. And I don’t do play fights, but if you shoot me I’ll rip you a new one. And I want $500.”

“That’s- a lot of money-“

“You won’t miss it. You and your piece of shit rich friends spend that kind of change like it’s nothing on designer clothes and cocaine. And I want to see your sorry face when you’re forced to cough it up after I flatten your ass then steal your man.”

“You- why are you so mean to me? Hey- you are not allowed to-“ Grian didn’t let him finish, beating his wings hard enough to batter HotGuy’s face before taking off, definitively this time.

Perfect. This was going to be fun.

[solargeist]

I’m new here and I love everything you’re making already ! I’m just wondering what the story here is?

hello !!!! thank you !!

the story here is uh, an AU of Evo Smp by Grian ! My tag is [here]

i assume thats what ur asking ?

The short version: The story is abt a young man leaving his life behind and joining a bunch of angels, but its not what he thought it'd be like and he regrets it and goes on the run for a long time.

The long version: The angels, known as Watchers, are known to watch players, only interacting to give them new things and updates, or punish them for breaking rules, such as being greedy.

They originally did not like Grian, seeing him as too robust, but over time he catches their (many) eyes, a diamond in the rough... He shows many characteristics of a promising Watcher, he enjoys setting pranks and stalking people, finding entertainment in explosions and traps, and always craving more.

So they start talking to him, they usually don't speak directly to players, only leaving notes, but they talk to him, he's special they say. He calls them the Audience.

The Watchers talk to him often, giving him compliments on his building skills, on his pranks, or they just listen as he rambles abt his life.

Grian is an orphan, I mean he is 25 at this point in time, but he grew up without parents. He has a little sister he took care of, but shes also grown now. Theres a small part of him that has grief over this, that ache, or longing, to have grown up with a regular family, to be taken care of. The Watchers catch onto this, its their job really to notice. They already think of him as a child, but they start acting more familial now, asking if he ate, or slept, or checking him over for any scratches, (much like a mother would--but he swallows these thoughts down, insisting this is how angels are to every player, but its not true, they let him know how much potential he has, so promising ! so special !)

That small part of him really starts to ache and grow.

This isn't the only thing the Watchers do though, they also make a tiny little effort to separate him from other players, quietly isolating him so the transition will be easier. It works, Grian notices his friends not coming around as often, they're probably busy, so he doesn't want to bother them. This goes on for awhile, any negative thought Grian expresses, the Watchers will agree with, in a gentle way... Sometimes people grow apart.. Sometimes you outgrow people.. Its for the better. He festers in these ideas, sometimes just laying on the stone floor of his basement, having not spoken to anyone in days. He looks forward to when the angels come around, even if they're just small floating eyes, sometimes a hand will split through reality and ruffle his hair. (if he leans into the touch, he doesn't realize)

Grian thinks that small aching part of him has outgrown his body.

One day, after who knows how long, the Watchers encourage him to meet up with his fellow players again. He questions why, but they tell him it'll be good for him to go play, theres a portal for them all to go through, a dragon on the other side. Its actually quite nice talking to everyone again, a bit awkward, but they're joking around, and when they find the portal, Grian jumps in before anyone can finish speaking. He was always rather impulsive ! He jumps through and stands alone on a platform, laughing to himself in the dark void, waiting for everyone else to go through. But no one does, the Watchers didn't tell him he'd be alone after jumping through, separated from the group, he feels abandoned. That ache rises again, hurt and anger twisting together, forming embarrassment. The Watchers were right in telling him he doesn't have anyone else to rely on, but them. So he does his quest, he kills the dragon by himself, an arrow between its eyes and it hits the ground behind him, dragging.

Hes sweaty, his clothes are burnt and torn, he's exhausted and he just wants to go home and climb in bed, no matter how dirty he is right now, but before he can go through, an angel statue catches his attention, it slowly moves off its pedestal, having watched his entire fight.

He didn't realize how tall they were off the pedestal, they also wear dark clothes that hide their faces and form, but two large dark wings peak out, its not exactly expected from angels. (Grian is 5'0, every Watcher towers over him)

They talk, and She offers him a place with the Watchers, if he wants to join them..... He's tired, hes hurt, and he's still mad at everyone, how could he say no ? He agrees.

Upon becoming a Watcher and being welcomed into a new world, he gets a haircut, he gets new clothes, and he gets a new room. The buildings rly are beautiful here, he gawks at the architecture, THIS is what he wanted, what he craved, he wanted to do this work too, the tools he could get his hands on has him bouncing on his heels and barely paying attention to the Watcher.

This excitement doesn't last too long, after hes introduced to others and settled in, theres new expectations on him, hes a Watcher now, not just a player, so things are gonna be harder to impress now. The Watchers have to shape him into a Watcher, so they don't let him sleep for a few days, to soften his attitude, they only stop this when he breaks down in exhaustion and tears, but his manners are better like they wanted.

Grian's not allowed to go out by himself, he can't leave the island even if he wanted to anyway, so most of his time is spent within the main few buildings, exploring the halls and library, its a good thing, bc they also make him study a lot, theres a lot to learn abt Watchers and their history, their magic, and their culture.

They don't give him glasses, instead teaching him enchantment magic to use instead, its good to always have Watcher magic flowing through your blood. His eyes are a constant soft purple.

Watchers, being angels, don't rly have to eat, so if Grian wants to eat, he has to ask a Watcher to summon food for him, the fruit tastes good, but anything cooked is always off or completely wrong. If he asks, they'll give him raw ingredients to cook by himself, with supervision of course. (not that he needs it, he is 25 years old and raised himself)

The one particular Watcher that has responsibility over him is named Aether, also known as Watcher Mum, shes the one that makes sure he has food, clothes, and is generally taken care of. She's a lot softer on him than expected, he's so cute ! and tiny ! She can't be strict on him ! She cuts his fruit into little shapes for him, even though he didn't rly ask.

The thing abt having Watcher magic flowing through his body near constantly, is that its slowly changing him. He grows wings, and it hurts so bad he thinks hes dying, they rip out of his skin after a few weeks, splattering blood across his room and bed. Aether cleans that and him up, tending to the wound. She doesn't have worry in her voice when she comments on how bright and pretty his wings are under all the blood. Its moments like this where Grian wonders how much of a mistake he's made, as he stares at the Watchers' extra eyes, and talon hands, he wonders when that'll happen to him, and how much it'll hurt, and how its his fault.

Ah, i'll stop here, its getting very long and I haven't even touched on his run away, or the Listeners, or what Watchers are, or the s6-s8 recovery and relapse arc, or the different timeline connections and his God self he accidentally created and doomed-- i ahve a lot stored in my head *explodes*

[blueishspace]

Third Life but with divine domains...

Part 2: Session 1 & 2.

Link: Explanation and Rules

Session 1

The first session is pretty much the same, just people hanging out. Maybe a bit more of playing with abilities like in most origins server.

Joel probably ropes Jeremysm into it somehow, by the end of the session the lore is that the belief from the cult made him a god or something.

Most people wouldn't settle in the desert when one of their abilities require dirt...but Scar isn't most people, he still comes up with the sand monopoly idea and then invites Grian.

Scott doesn't settle in the flower valley as It's hardly a cold biome meaning he doesn't meet Jimmy there... however ironically enough he probably still meets Jimmy and teams up because Jimmy would venture into the forest which is quite literally inbetween the flower valley and the mountains... If they do this then there is a zone around BigB's future base where there is both snow and forest meaning we could see a BigB-Jimmy-Scott team.

"Don't be a dog, be a God!" Tagline has a different meaning when the players are gods doesn't it?

Impulse, Tango, Etho, Bdubs, and Cleo gifting Grian an offering chest also has a different meaning huh.

Grian leads a creeper to Scar, Scar powers don't protect from creepers so hus first death remains the same. "Knowledge isn't Wisdom" is going to be considered important in this alternative fandom.

Also Skizzle still does die to an enderman...rip.

Session 1 is basically the same for everything else sooo...

Let's consider Skins

Grian doesn't change his, that I'm sure... And Joel, Jimmy and Scott probably use a variation of the X-life cult skins... BigB also doesn't change his. The Hermits definitely change their skins somehow though... I can't imagine how. Maybe Cleo would go for a dress like in Witchcraft? BdoubleO goes gold like when he becomes a sun god in Empires? I want to believe the Scitties survive the apotheosis... Well that's a phrase that exists now... Now, back to important stuff.

Session 2

Let's just say it now, if something isn't explicitely said then it isn't majorly changed

BigB doesn't invest in diamond armor as his powers makes leather armor just as good.

Alliances remain mostly unchanged for now as Scott and Jimmy are a special case because of their powers.

BdoubleO still falls to his death as he is not boosted during the night and he was too busy building to use any abilities...

The Pizza stuff still happens though the general pettyness of everyone involved in that mess makes more sense with them being divinities... Just look at greek and norse and egyptian mythology.

Fandom?

Now... I have to admit that I'll need help for these ones... after all who better then the fandom to help Imagine what an alternative fandom would be like right? Also if anyone knows my Slay The Watcher Au you'll know comments make me happy.

Next part

First part

[greeenchrysanthemums]

Thus Always to Tyrants

Chapter 4: Bitter Bonds.

Gem is the commander of the Wintertide royal army, Grian is the leader of a resistance hell bent on taking the crown down no matter the cost. It was only natural that they would become enemies.

Beginning -> previous -> next

Read on ao3 ❀ here ❀

CW: manipulation, dubious morality, and overall poor behavior from Grian.

Words: 5,045

Pov: Grian

❀ ❀ ❀ ❀ ❀

“You told me that all you were doing during the festival was meeting with that Crestian man!” Pearl hissed, her hands fisted in the front of Grian’s shirt.  Her large, silver and white wolf-dog, Tilly, growled at her side, snapping at Grian’s ankles but never actually biting.

The hold lifted him off of the ground, the tips of his talons just barely scraping the cobbled ground of the alleyway behind the M&E Tinkering Shop in downtown Capital, where he had some business to attend to. Not that he ever made it inside to take care of said business, though. She had grabbed him and dragged him into the shadows before he could so much as think of setting a talon on the threshold. 

“Joel has a name, you know.” Grian said in leu of an answer. Pearl shook him and pulled his face closer to her own, her warm breath smelling of mead where it fanned across his face. If it were anyone else manhandling him in such a way, he would have clawed their eyes out in an instant for daring to treat him like this, but because it was Pearl he let it slide for now. The two of them went way back, after all. He could hardly maim an old friend

“I don’t care about his bloody name, the point is that you lied to me!” She growled.

“I did not lie to you. I never said I would or wouldn’t be talking to Gem during the festival. If anything, I withheld the truth.” Grian defended himself. And it was true! He didn’t intend to run into her on that specific night, but it worked out nicely in the end.

“As if that is any better!” She snapped, dropping him roughly and turning away to run a hand through her long, mousey curls. “Do you have any idea how messy this is going to be now that she is involved?”

“I am failing to see why this is such a big deal, Pearl. She was already involved, all I did was make her a little more aware of things.” Grian argued, readjusting his crooked cloak and fixing her with an annoyed look.

“She may have already been involved, but now you’ve brought her closer than she ever needed to be. She’ll either ruin our entire plan or she’ll end up dead.” Pearl said. She had the edge of her thumb in her mouth, teeth tearing at the cuticle as she stared into the distance, deep in thought. Tilly remained hunched at his feet, her ruby red eyes training on him as she growled. Grian eyed both of them wearily.

“Believe it or not, I have no intention of letting Gem die, she has a vital part to play in all of this. It was always part of the plan to inform her of something stirring in the shadows. I didn’t tell you because I didn’t think you would be so passionate about her involvement.” Grian admitted. “I didn’t realize that the two of you were so…close.”

“We’re not!” She snapped at him, baring her teeth with a snarl. Tilly growled louder and gave him a short bark. Grian had always found it endearing that the old dog mirrored her owner's emotions so much, but he was inclined to like it a little less when she pointed those deadly teeth at him.

“You could have fooled me,” Grian said, raising his eyebrows at her, unamused. “You need to tell me immediately if you have something more going on with the commander than I know off. As far as I remembered, you were just pretending to be on her good side to smuggle information out to us. If that’s changed, you’re a liability and you're out.”

“There is nothing between us. I could care less about her,” Pearl said immediately. There was uncertainty in her voice, doubt in her eyes. There was a kind of guilt lingering in their depths as well. 

“Then why are you so bothered by all of this?” Grian asked, crossing his arms and turning his chin up to her.

“Because! This makes my job so much more difficult.” Pearl snarled before sighing and pinching the bridge of her nose between two fingers, “I will have to work twice as hard to keep her off of my tail now that she’s going to be looking for suspicious behavior. At the very least, I would have liked a little bit of a warning before you went and pulled a stunt like this. I did not need to be blindsided by the information and hear of it through Gem herself instead of from you, someone I am supposed to trust.”

“So you’ll have to do a little bit more work, you knew what you signed up for with the resistance. It’s not as though she suspects you of anything currently, does she?” Grian stated smugly, spreading his arms out with a smirk.

“No, she doesn’t.” Pearl bit out, a vicious anger dripping from her mouth like froth from the maw of a snarling wolf. Tilly’s lips pulled back as she bared her teeth at him a second time, appearing just moments away from pouncing. He spared the dog barely a glance, knowing with certainty that she wouldn’t attack him.

“Is that all you wanted to talk about?” Grian asked dismissively.

“Yes.” She spat, still glaring at him, her hands clenched into fists.

“Great. Now, do you mind letting me do what I came here to do?” He asked somewhat sarcastically before turning and heading inside. Just as he suspected she would, she followed after him despite not needing to, still seething as she did so. 

Pearl whistled and pointed at the ground just outside of the shop's entrance and Tilly obeyed the command, curling up in the dirt with her tail tucked around her old body. The dog’s angry eyes followed Grian until he disappeared from view, her ears flickering with annoyance.

He didn’t blame Pearl for being angry, she had every right to be, after all. He knew that it was foolish to involve Gem without informing her, but giving the commander the warning sooner rather than later had worked in their favour anyway, so it was not as though it was a big deal in the end. The streets may now be filled to the brim with guards that could catch them any moment, which meant they had to be extra careful when traversing the capital, but that made snooping around the castle so much easier!

Gem had tried her best to divide Wintertide’s forces evenly, but there were only so many knights at her disposal, and many of them were not nearly as well trained as he was sure she would like them to be, all of them far too complacent and lazy in wake of the tense peace times. They had already been able to get people inside without anyone being any wiser of it. The move had been an overall positive for the movement.

And, besides, now that he had done it, he was pleased with how Pearl had reacted. He had suspected for quite some time now that the relationship between the two women wasn’t the purely transactional one Pearl tried to make it out to be. He had his suspicions that the younger woman had let herself grow attached somewhere along the way, and this was all the confirmation that he needed to prove just that. 

He would now have to keep a close eye on her, limit how much information she was privy to. It wasn’t the most ideal situation, but he would have to make do with it. She was a valuable player in his game, he could not simply drop her like he had threatened to. He was smart enough to realize that he needed her.

The dimly lit inside of the shop was neither small nor spacious. It was the perfect medium size to house the cobbled front counter, rows of shelves against the walls, and barrels upon barrels full of scrap metal and wood, as well as some toy weapons thrown into the mix. Knick knacks of all varieties ranging from clocks to toys and music boxes all lined the hand crafted and well worn shelves.

Birds, dragons, and other flying creatures made of carefully woven precious metals were hanging from thin chains attached to the support frames in the ceiling, their jewel eyes reflecting back the dim light from the lanterns that mixed in with the ornate animals. Pearl had to duck to avoid hitting her head on some of the more low hanging ones. 

Soot and woodchips messied the floors and the counter, showing that the broom leaning against the wall at the entrance was for little more than display. There were a few customers milling about, looking on the shelves and in the barrels for what might fit their fancy, but the people Grian was seeking were nowhere in sight.

However, they were inside no more than a few minutes before a loud bang met their ears and hot air rushed towards them to singe their faces and the tips of their hair as something exploded in the back room, answering the mystery of their whereabouts in an instant.

The door behind the counter was blasted open, banging against the wall with enough force to shake the foundation of the building. Black smoke billowed out of the doorway and customers rushed out of the building with exclamations of panic. Moments later, a tall, spindly man with a mustache stumbled out of the back room coughing up a storm, his red leather apron and the clothes underneath it both thoroughly covered in black grime.

“Oh, Mumbo, when will you learn to not explode your projects?” Grian taunted as he stepped closer to his friend, his lips quirking into a genuine half-smile. The taller man pulled his soot stained goggles up and set them on top of his blown back hair. 

“Grian!” Mumbo exclaimed between coughs before ambling over to the avian and pulling him up into a hug. “We thought you were going to be coming ‘round later than this, mate! Thought I had some time to work on this before you got here.”

“I decided to come a little early.” He replied, patting Mumbo’s back. He was set down back onto his feet just as a man a little shorter than Mumbo stumbled out of the still smoking room, his usually snow white hair turned an ashy grey colour, his own leather apron and green tunic equally covered in muck. His goggles were already pushed up and must have not been covering his eyes when the explosion went off, because even his eyelids were stained black.

“Oh snappers, you’re early, boss. Sorry about the smoke.” Etho said apologetically as he made his way over to a pulley that sat against the right hand wall. He pulled on it, hand over hand, and slowly a hatch opened in the ceiling and the smoke began to clear out.

“It’s no problem.” Grian said, dusting himself off to clear away the bits of soot Mumbo had gotten on him.

Mumbo scanned the room to make sure everyone but them was cleared out before going over to the front door and locking it, waving a hand at them to follow him towards the back door. “Well, let's get to it then.”

“We’re not going to explode, as well, if we go in there, are we?” Pearl jested. Mumbo’s cheeks turned red and Etho laughed.

“No, you should be perfectly safe. It was just a little explosion anyway.” Etho replied.

“Just a little explosion, he says,” Pearl said absently with a roll of her eyes as she followed Mumbo into the back. Grian followed behind them, pulling his hood down as he went. It was pretty hot in the little shop.

Mumbo Jumbo and Etho Lab, one of Grian’s oldest friends and a Wintertide royal knight turned traitor, both of whom just so happened to be two of Grian’s most valuable resistance members. Though Etho’s inside intel has long since become obsolete, and he was now a wanted criminal who was hiding from the law in plain sight, the knowledge on explosives and combat he possessed from his time in the war was invaluable when combined with Mumbo’s keen skill for creating machines and weaponry. The two of them made a hell of a team.

The two men weren’t the most serious people he had ever met. In fact, they were both a bit laid back and goofy most of the time, and that had initially made him hesitant to pair them together in the start, but they always got the job done when push came to shove. That was all that mattered to Grian in the end. 

In the center of the back room was a long, wooden table covered in the scraps of something large, the abused oak scratched up and decorated in scorch marks. Evidently, the scraps were the cause of the mysterious explosion, smoke still coming off of them in black and grey swirls.

There was a stone hearth against the left wall, the dying embers flickering in shades of yellow and orange. Bags and barrels full of who knows what, as well as half finished projects, littered the ground and spilled off of the large shelf that covered the entire back wall.

“Alright then, let's cut right to the chase,” Grian started, “Pearl pawned it off to you two, so where is it?” 

“It’s just over here,” Etho said, walking over to a part of the expansive shelf that was occupied entirely by books. He pulled out a large, black, leather bound book with ornate royal purple detailing on the cover and spine. The front was damaged, the design that was meant to adorn it scratched off, but he knew that it was like that before his resistance member's took possession of the book. It was an intentional defacing that had to have been done centuries ago.

“In the bookcase? A little on the nose, don’t you think?” Grian said, equal parts amused and peeved.

“Well, people would assume we’d hide it, would they not? The bookcase would be the last place they think to look. Hiding in plain sight has worked out for me this far.” Etho said, the corners of his eyes scrunching up in a way that suggested he was smiling as he passed the book off to the avian.

“I can’t argue with that.” Grian barked out a laugh as he pulled the book carefully out of Etho’s grasp, delicately flipping through the aged pages that felt as though they would fall apart if he wasn't careful.

“I’m still not sure what that is or why you made me steal that dusty old thing, but it better have been worth all the effort I put into it. I have a bruise the size of Bigb’s famous cookies on my arsecheek.” Pearl said from where she was standing leant against the center table with her arms crossed.

“I also don’t understand why we had to take it after the fact. It made our jobs that night a lot harder, you know, having to worry about some dusty old book and get our task done at the same time.” Mumbo piped up as he tinkered on a new gadget on the blackened table surface, ignoring the smoking husk.

“This, my dear allies, is a grimoire. A highly valuable one at that.” Grian grinned, a deeply satisfied smiling splitting his face. “And I had Pearl hand it off to you because she is an outsider that close to someone inside of the castle. If they noticed it missing, which they miraculously haven’t as of now, she would be one of their main suspects and it would be found immediately if they searched her belongings. 

“You two, however, are nowhere on the kingdom’s radar outside of being the cause of more than a dozen noise complaints. That’s another reason I waited a few days to come here, so that it would be less likely for anyone to be looking for me, and they would be less likely to trace the book's disappearance to you.”

“So you knew that they would suspect me first and didn’t think to give me a heads up on that either?” Pearl asked, that angry upturn to her lips returning. It disturbed him just a bit how similar she and Tilly looked some of the time. It brought to mind the old magic tales about mages melding their souls together with a beast in order to strengthen their magic. He had no doubt that in another world, the two of them would have gladly joined their souls into one.

“We’ve been over this, you knew it was a risk when you agreed to be a mole. There's no need to be angry about it now.” Grian said, waving his hand at her as he continued to search for the page he was looking for.

“But, wait, a grimoire? As in, for magic?” Etho asked, wringing his gloved hands together nervously.

“Yes, Etho, for magic,” Grian said, raising his eyes to give the man a semi-manic grin.

“What use could you possibly have for that? No one in our ranks knows any magic.” Pearl stated suspiciously. Mumbo gave him a grim, knowing look and notedly avoided his eyes.

“Let’s not worry about that at this moment.” Grian said, snapping the book closed and tucking it away in the waistband of his trousers. “So, tell me, is everything coming along nicely?”

Etho still looked unsure as he shuffled over to the table to stand by Mumbo’s side, and Pearl looked annoyed more than she did angry now, so that was an improvement. Mumbo rubbed his sooty forehead and sighed.

“Everything is going according to plan for the most part,” Mumbo said. Grian waited for the ‘but’ that sat on the tip of the mustached man’s tongue. “The explosives are still unpredictable, though. There's no telling if they will work how we intend. They could cause more damage or less damage than we are anticipating.”

Mumbo gestured towards Etho, who nodded and went back over to the back wall, retrieving a rolled up tube of paper from the uppermost left part of the shelf before coming back and handing them to his partner. Mumbo unrolled the first and spread it out across the table, brushing loose debris and thick soot out of the way to avoid soiling the parchment too badly. 

“And how are we planning to counter that?” Grian asked. He hopped up to hold onto the back of Mumbo’s chair, his talons latching onto the semi-splintered wood as he peered over his shoulder at the map of the castle grounds the other man pulled out.

“In the event that it causes more damage, that will work in our favour, so we don’t have to worry about that too much. If it does less, then we’ve planted a series of explosives here” He pointed to the garden walls, “and here” He traced his finger over towards the far side of the stables.

“These are spots in the wall that we found are exceptionally weak and shouldn’t need as much force as other parts to destroy, so no matter how much damage the blasts cost we’ll be able to break in regardless. They aren’t the most defendable spots within the inner walls, though, and thus are not our first picks for entry points, which is why they've been relegated to back up. “ Etho picked up where Mumbo left off, lazily scratching at the scarred skin at the edge of his empty eye socket as he did so.

“Perfect, good work, you two.” Grian said, eyes scanning over the map and taking in all of the bold Xs that littered the surface, all indicative of explosives they’ve planted inside of the castle walls and beneath the ground where they would be undetectable.

“What of casualties?” Pearl asked suddenly. All three men looked up at her tilted head and pinched expression. “This sounds like a lot of destruction.”

“We hope to end the fighting before the innocents have the chance to get involved. That’s why we’re employing the help of Coral Crest, so that we can overwhelm them quickly and effectively. The explosions also will not touch the castle itself, and they will be set off when the least amount of people are likely to be out and about. That’s why you were asked to observe schedules over the years, we’re going to use that to avoid as many casualties as possible.” Grian soothed. It seemed to quell some of Pearl’s worries as her wrinkled brow smoothed out and she nodded before looking away.

“Have you heard from Cleo lately?” Etho asked to break the sudden tension.

“I have not, no.” Grian admitted, “Have they been trying to contact me?”

Etho nodded, “She needs to talk to you about the sword production, and they had a question for you about arrow tips or something like that. I wasn’t paying much attention, to be honest. We’re all also getting pretty antsy for news about the next group meeting.”

“The next meeting should be within the next few days or by the end of the coming fortnight. I’ll be sure to get into contact with Cleo before that; thank you for informing me of the matter.” Grian said before hopping off the back of Mumbo’s chair and landing on the ground with light feet. “Is that all there is to discuss today? Do any of you have anything to add or ask of me?”

“Just one more thing!” Mambo said before jumping to his feet and rushing over to one of the barrels. He rooted around in it before producing a handful of smoke bombs like the one he had used on Gem the day of the festival. They always made sure to have them stocked up for Grian; they were his favorite playthings.

“Thank you, I had almost forgotten to ask about them.” Grian said, gladly accepting them with a smile.

“No problem, mate.” Mambo replied cheerfully. His eyes were serious, though, as he pulled away from Grian, gaze drifting down to where he had tucked the book away with weariness. Grian met his eyes and smiled. Whether it was a reassuring smile or a dismissive one, who was to say.

With that Grian shook both men’s hands, bidding them warm farewells before he was off, leaving the shop with a promise to be in contact again soon. Pearl and Tilly followed hot on his heels as he traveled through the city before stopping just at the forest's edge.

“You better keep me better informed in the future, Grian. I don’t like being used like that.” Pearl warned. She glared at him over her shoulder, blue eyes appearing almost crimson in the waning light, far too wolf-like for his liking.

“Of course, Pearl.” He said simply. She huffed at him before turning to face forward and stalking back into the city, a growling Tilly at her side as her red cloak swayed from side to side.

He watched her go until she melted into the crowd, a cold feeling burning in his stomach where the book was resting and creeping up towards his throat. Once she was entirely out of sight, he pivoted and made his way into the thickets, wishing he could fly to get home quicker. His talon’s ached from being on them for so long.

As he walked through the forest a second pair of footsteps joined his own nimble ones, crushing the leaves and snapped branches under heavy boots, a cane thudding against the ground in beat with each step. An echoey meow filled the air and Jellie trotted up to walk beside him, her tiny legs moving fast to keep pace as she occasionally rubbed her cold head against his leg.

“Couldn’t wait for me to make it back to the hideout?” Grian asked, tilting his head up and back to meet Scar’s unnaturally green eyes. The man grinned at him, the smile all teeth and sinister, sharp edges.

“Do you finally have it?” Scar asked in place of answering Grian’s question. Grian didn’t answer and instead stopped in the middle of the forest to pull the book free and hold it out to him. Scar snatched it away with overeager hands, pulling Grian off balance in his haste to have the book in his possession. 

Grian huffed and righted himself, crossing his arms. “Are you going to be able to use it? I hope we didn’t cut it too close, getting it to you this late.”

“This is perfect, little bird,” Scar said, running his fingers down the front of the book before snapping his fingers, causing it to disappear with a flourish of pale flames. “If anything, this might have been too soon to snatch it out from under their noses. They are sure to notice it is missing, if they haven’t already… In any case, I’ve long ago mastered the art of quick learning. You have nothing to worry about when it comes to me and this little book.”

“Who is to say I was worried?” Grian asked before continuing on his way to the hideout. Jellie meowed at him and he leant down to allow her to hop onto his thin shoulders. Why she liked to perch there was beyond him, but he supposed he could relate to finding a nice perch, as uncomfortable or unconventional as some of them may actually be.

“I can see it written all over your face. Things are progressing so fast after years of slow build up and you’re not used to the pace. You’re worried about the little things and what could go wrong.” Scar said, slinking up next to him, walking with one arm folded behind his back and his torso bent at the waist so that he could meet Grian’s eyes, that infuriating, smug smile pulling his lips up.

“I have nothing to worry about,” Grian said, avoiding Scar’s eyes.

“Oh, but you do, don’t you? Pearl could turn traitor any day-”

“No, she won’t. If Pearl is anything, she’s loyal.” Grian snapped, cutting the other off. Scar stood up straight, his face sarcastically questioning.

“But you aren’t the only one she is loyal to, are you?” Scar asked with an air of faux naivety. Grian stayed silent, knowing the other was right. True as it may be, though, he knew Pearl wouldn’t betray them. She wouldn’t dare to. “And besides, she isn’t the only one you are worried about. The Crestians' also have uncertain loyalties, they could just be using us for their own gain. Not to mention our man on the inside… What has he been up to lately?”

“He’s the last person I’m worried about,” Grian stated, ignoring the taunting words about the people of Coral Crest. He knew they were probably just using the resistance as a means to an end to finally defeat their long-time enemies, but he wasn’t worried about it. They would all fall into the roles he’s picked out for them eventually. “He’s done everything I’ve asked of him with no hesitation. He’s pulling strings behind the scenes as we speak.”

“Humans really are so single minded. Once they’ve set their hearts to something they can see nothing else.” Scar said cryptically as they reached the entrance of the hideout. “I would be more cautious of this fact in the future if you really want this plan to come to fruition.”

“I’ll take your word for it.” Grian said, entering the hidden cave, holding onto Jellie’s back to make sure she didn’t fall as he dipped down. 

“You really are the most amusing being I’ve ever had the pleasure of meeting in my lifetime.” Scar said, his words tinged with childlike joy.

“And you are the most annoying.” Grian retorted with a huff. “Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to go over these plans before the next meeting. You run along and get to work on learning that spell.”

Before he could move further into the cave, Scar’s hand grabbed his wrist in a tight grip, pulling him back to meet his eyes. Jellie jumped off of his shoulder with a startled cry, circling the two of them while her tail flickered back and forth. Scar maintained that easy smile of his, but there was clear annoyance in his cold eyes, which seemed to shift in colour just the faintest bit.

“You would do well to listen to what others have to say once in a while, you know.” Scar said, deceitfully calm and sweet.

Grian met his eyes with equally cold ones before wrenching his wrist away and stepping back. There was a tense silence in the cramped cave that could be cut with the swipe of a taloned hand. The air felt colder than it had before.

“This plan has both of our interests at heart, it wouldn’t do us well to fight this far into things. Don’t forget what's in it for you,” Grian snapped, straightening his sleeve where it had ridden up at the rough handling. The tense silence lasted a little longer before Scar’s strained smile smoothed out.

“Right, of course. I’ll go ahead and get to work; you do the same.” Scar said, words still sickeningly sweet like a mouthful of sugar.

Grian said nothing more, and neither did Scar, as the taller man continued on into the cave while Grian remained put, the rhythmic sound of his cane tapping on stone slowly getting fainter and fainter.

He gripped his own wrist in the same spot Scar had, the pressure slowly increasing, his nails digging onto the soft skin as he bit into his lip. He couldn’t afford to fall apart and start fights with his most valuable players like this so close to his dreams finally coming true. He wasn’t worried, he wasn’t.

Everything was going to work out fine, he desperately told himself. He would make sure it did.

Things couldn't end up the same way they had all those years ago.

[ohtobealizard]

Okay, I've been cooking up something, and it's not done yet but it's getting pretty close! I have been doing a sorta homebrew type situation putting minecraft into d&d terms. And I know that this has been done before, and by way more talented people than I but I'm pretty proud of what I, and a friend of mine have made so far.

We've got the classes done, except for you know buffs debunks all the stuff anyone needs to actually know, but let me explain our thought process with them a bit. There are three main classes they are: Explorer, Enchanter, and Builder. And don't worry there's more to it than that. The idea is you pick a main clas and for the first like 2 levels you get general proficiencys in different things. Like strength for builder, dex for explorer, and wisdom for enchanter. Stuff like that.

Than at level three you pick a subclass, and side note with how I'm doing this I don't think it'd be possible to multiclass. There are three subclasses for each main class. And to add a little twist to it, y'all know d&d alignments? When you pick a subclass your also picking 1/2 of your alignment. That's right, each subclass is designated as either chaotic, neutral, and lawful while you, the player pick the second part of good, neutral, or evil!

Explorer: Speedrunner (chaotic), Fighter (neutral), and PvPer (lawful)

Enchanter: Prankster (chaotic), Witch (neutral), and Redstoner (lawful)

Builder: Miner (chaotic), Farmer (neutral), and Gatherer (lawful)

Some of the builder alignments might be changed but as of right now this is how it's going to be. I'm pretty proud of the work and thought my friend and I put into this. I also have some stuff done for what potions, Armour, stats, and other things will look like but I need to go over them again. But to give you some kind of perspective of what the classes are like let's get some real world example based on vibes.

I'm going to use some minecrafters as examples. So Grian for example would be of the Prankster subclass, while Mumbo would be of the Redstoner subclass. GoodTimesWithScar as I'm thinking about him would fit well with the Prankster or Witch subclasses.

Tommyinnit would be a fighter subclass, possibly a pvper the same with Philza Minecrafter. I feel like Martyn InTheLittleWood would be more of a speed runner, but he could easily be a fighter subclass as well.

I'll admit I don't have many examples of any builder subclass minecrafters off the top of my head, but their out there!

That's about it, hope y'all enjoyed reading my little ramble. I liked making it! Also come over to my twitch tomorrow and come watch me play Gotham Knights! I been obsessed with it lately!

[mothzarellaman]

The Life Series and Eyes (A Headcanon Rambling)

hello traffiblr! Y'all voted to have me rant about the life series and my personal headcanons regarding eyes, so. Here we go!

Overview

So let me hit you guys with a quick overview.

here's a quick reference. While these all depend on the individual, and the series, I'll explain what each general eye color means.

4+ Lives

People with 4+ lives fall into this category. Their eyes are a dark green, bordering on teal. I think it would be interesting if A. eyes act as a sort of weak gradient in terms of 4-1 lives. So, there's a bit more blue. 2. Personal headcanons regarding speakers, and their colors. 3. A sort of parallel to the Boogey eyes. both are very dark. So its harder to tell if they have 4+ lives somehow, or if they're boogey.

3 Lives

A classic. A nice, simple green. While the exact hue varies depending on the person (because of either violent or peaceful behavior/simply what looks good with them), greens have generally bright green eyes.

2 Lives

Similarly to 3, the exact hue depends on behavior of the individual. Someone who's more violent would be closer to an amber, while peace loving players lean towards more of a yellow-green. The eyes are always clearly yellow, though.

1 Life

While the others would go towards a color dependent on behavior, all bets are called off for reds. The hue is purely aesthetic. It is no longer a clue towards general behavior. There's rarely any allowance for personal preferences in reds. All they can see is violence and conquest.

Boogey

Basically, I reject the idea of boogies having purple eyes or glints for symbolism with watchers. It's far more threatening to me if their normally bright colored eyes are chips of the void. Obviously, characters still have pupils, I just don't include them in my style. I can't decide if Boogies have pure black eyes, or if their eyes are a dried-blood color so dark it only seems reddish in light.

0 Lives / Dead

And finally, we have grey eyes. When it comes to deaths before the final death, the bodies disappear quickly, as soon as the person respawns, I'd wager. But after that final death, their body remains. Their eyes quickly lose all color, and end up as grey. This was chosen just out of design choice, the lifeless look, and also, by incident, Scar's red-life skin. It makes him completely greyscale, so a similar logic applies here.

Character Specific Colors

Here's a quick guide to character specific colors. Again, everyone has a unique one. Do note that most of these are simply what looks good, as I've only had the time to watch Grian's pov, and not anyone elses.

Ik they don't really... look good and may not fit, but hey, I'm here to rant about design ideas, not actual colors lol. And you will not believe how hard it is to make 16 different palletes unique and at least kinda match the character while having the same main 4 colors. I will address Grian, dw. Boogey and dead eyes are the same color, regardless of character.

3rd Life

Alright, so, from the base rules, nothing changes. It uses the same logic mentioned up above. Green, yellow, red, and grey. There's no real special mentions here that are exclusive to 3L.

Last Life

Similarly to 3L, LL lacks any specific changes to eyes. The only addition are the new eye colors for boogey and 4+.

Double Life

Here, characters share eye colors. What do I mean by this? I mean, their signature eye colors are at a gradient with their soulmate's. So, for example, Pearl and Scott's Green eyes are mixed as a gradient with both are on green. This applies for every life, and every soulbond. It gives people slight clues as to who exactly their soulmate is, but its hard to tell. When scar showed up boasting purple eyes, everyone was confused, to say the least lmao.

Limited Life

ok i'm definitely the happiest with this one. The idea is that everyone's eyes are functionally, like a clock. I illustrated it really badly, but the idea is cool ok. The idea is that like, idk, every 1/8 of someone's eye represents an hour. Every hour lost from the 'benchmark' turns to the next color. For example, if someone has 24 hours, their eyes are pure green. If they have, say, 18, they only have 1/4 (2/8) of green left, the rest of their eye being green. If they have only an hour left, they only have an 1/8 of an eye red, the rest being grey. The color of their current life slowly recedes in an almost spiral pattern as time goes on. If someone somehow had 24+ hours, same rule would apply to their 4+ life, so to speak. they'd only have a sliver of the dark green, with most of their eye being their 'normal' green.

Grian

okay, I know for sure people are questioning why Grian's eyes are neon purple. The reason why is on the simpler side. Watcher. He's the only one out of the players to be an actual watcher. Some people (like Pearl and BigB) definitely have some ties to them, but Grian's the only full blown watcher. (Martyn is tied to the listeners, who are green to me, so his colors are greener despite being prone to violence lmao. And Scott is tied more to the Speakers, who are blueish/cyan to me. Pearl, as Scott's soulmate in DL, has that bluish tint to a degree. )

But, you might ask, how do people not notice??? Well, its because of my Grian design.

This is old and it doesn't quite show my idea well, but alas.

I've already made reference images for this and I can't find the motive to draw a Grian headshot lmao. The idea is taking the Watcher's face plate. You know the one. The mask. And taking that, and instead of having the Evo symbol, no, it has, guess what. Grian's weird freaking eyes. Yep. Whether this was his attempt at camouflaging himself among non-watchers, or if it was his basically middle finger towards them, refusing to show obvious alliance with them, idk. All I know is he basically vandalized his Watcher mask. Still, you might say, that doesn't explain why is eye color is purple. Well, if you take away his mask, it's either basically a void with purple eyes inside, or probably some sort of void looking crack through his face, as if it isn't actually flesh. He can choose to have 'normal' eyes, but they always remain that Alexandria's Genesis purple, and it messes with his sight. Basically he sees too much. (I'd elaborate in my Watcher/Listener/Speaker post if people wanted 👀)

[hmshermitcraft]

Over the months that Grian stays with Bigb, the closer they get. Grian learns about how Bigb’s a botanist and that he likes baking (he also learns about this little thing bigb does when his tail wags whenever he’s passionate about something and it’s so damn cute-). Bigb learns about how Grian prefers his homemade sweaters over ones from town and that he has an eye for décor (He appreciates how nice Grian’s made the place over the months, but Grian refused to take the compliment when Bigb told him that).

They’ve been getting closer. It’s nice.

Grian hates this. The last time he loved anyone, they all disappeared without a trace. He can’t help but enjoy the times Bigb and him spend together, and he hates that. He can’t allow himself to love. It’s for the sake of his crush.

Bigb doesn’t understand the reason, but he can tell that Grian’s conflicted on spending time with him. He used to try and reach out, to ask what’s wrong, but he stopped after the many times the Dark Knight’s refused his help. It’s something he can’t help with, and he gets that. He’ll make sure that Grian knows he’s there for him every step.of the way.

Anon-nom

first ask

BigB knows there's something tragic in Grian. Not many people end up looking like that without something going on to start with. BigB has grown blind to the strangeness over time, though. In fact, he's grown to find comfort in it.

Grian's eyes still scrunch up when BigB gets a genuine smile out of him even if no light reaches them. The soft glow of purple in a dark room leaves BigB sighing with a quiet peace. The armour is stashed away, taken out more and more rarely nowadays. It's too bulky and loud to effectively hunt in around here, so Grian's grown to prefer lighter leathers. That doesn't leave powder around the house which drives BigB mad as well.

So it hurts. It hurts to grow so close to somebody and then be able to tell they're pulling away. BigB sometimes wonders if he'll wake up one morning and find Grian gone, no remnant of the domesticated Dark Knight he's come to love. It wouldn't surprise him. He gets the feeling it's been a long time since Grian's settled somewhere.

But BigB knows there's little else he can do. If he pushes any harder, the Dark Knight may disappear sooner. So he offers his unconditional support, as he's always done. He comes up with ideas for new sweaters so there's always one in progress, and Grian has a reason to stay.

He wants so badly to love Grian. He wishes Grian would let him.

[boatem-probler]

Cthulhu Returns as a Soccer Dad, in... Tokyo Soul!

1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5 / 6 / 7 / 8 / 9 / You Are Here!

Last Time on Tokyo Soul...

"So yeah, these are definitely gonna come out slower from now on." -- Me, a Fool

Yeah I have no excuse. But! With this big batch of episodes down, the finale is so close I can smell it. It smells like something witty I'll think of later.

This report contains mentions of: Blood, Violence, Death, Guns Medical Malpractice, Allusions to Sexual Harassment/Assault

So Let's Get Back To It...

Episode 36 – A NEW FRIEND!!

Sam and Grian are on Taurtis’s computer, looking at his search history. He’s been searching for hair growth formulas.

Doughboy has been cooking parts of himself and distributing them to people.

Grian and Sam convince Taurtis to do several very stupid things on the premise that they can cure hair loss.

Geode is having a yard sale of all the trash he’s collected. And also Taurtis’s school locker.

They go to the train station to pick up another one of Sam’s friends, this time from Canada. He and Suspicious Person (remember Suspicious Person? From way back in episode 1?) walk out of the walkway on fire. The train platform is also on fire. Apparently Sam’s friend, Nick, set the fire.

Sam sent Nick Taurtis’s school uniform in the mail.

Sam apparently met Nick in a My Little Pony chatroom, where Nick said he was 14. The boys express doubt about this, given that Nick has a very full beard.

Grian: “We’ve had worse friends.”

Sam: “We were just talking about sports, right guys?” Grian: “Uh huh, sports! Footballfootballfootballtennishockey. Golf.”

I’m obsessed with the way he says this.

The cashier at the convenience store is Hank Kingofthe Hill except his name is Frank Chill. Just. By the way.

Episode 37 – DRAGON BALL Z!!

They all go over to Geode’s yard sale. He is frolicking around in the trash with a knife. He has a “mask” that is just a severed Dom Clone head. Grian wants to buy Taurtis’s locker. Geode just hands him a whole bunch of raw chicken. Geode doesn’t exactly grasp the concept of “sale”.

Another one of those weird aliens from the special has landed in the soccer field, and he’s brought Minions. Yes, those ones.

The alien guy gives a whole Dramatic Alien Speech to the effect of: he heard about Taurtis defeating that other alien guy in the special, and he would now also like to fight Taurtis.

Grian: “On a completely unrelated note, has anyone got any bullets?”

Basically Grian REALLY hates Minions and would really like the opportunity to actually shoot some in real life.

Anime Alien charges up for a good long while, and then Taurtis One Punches him. Then all the Minions charge, so the boys end up killing most of them too.

Sam: “How did you get this powerful, Taurtis?” Taurtis: “I did a push-up yesterday!”

As is tradition, they take Nick to Get His Class Schedule. Sam tells him there’s a fatality rate to the procedure, which I’m not sure I remember anyone saying before so he may just be fibbing. No one died that Sam saw, anyway.

Oh dear. So, Señor Loro is not wearing a shirt, because Geode is wearing his Christmas sweater. It turns out that Geode did, in fact, steal it from him without his knowledge, and attempts to deny ever having it. Despite this, Geode and Señor Loro both profess to being best friends. Grian is skeptical of the idea that someone would steal their best friend’s clothes and go to school wearing them. Sam argues that Grian has done that before. You may be able to see where this is going.

Anyway, Nick and Señor Loro fight. Unfortunately, someone has stolen all of the schedules.

Also this episode has the “Sam is my dog” blooper at the end.

EPISODE 38 – THE DARK LORD CTHULHU!

Chupa won the lottery for 5 cents, so he’s summoning Cthulhu again with a ritual meant to “gaze into time”. The ritual text is more old memes. Everyone makes Grian read it.

The whole class is transported to a room with blank white walls and a whole lot of bookshelves just kind of floating in various places. Igbar Cthulhu is there.

There’s also someone else who looks like a shadow with rainbow hair. Grian “wants whatever she’s smoking”.

Cthulhu has decided not to destroy humanity, and instead let Sam do it for him. Sam is “the cause of it all”. And also “the root of it all”.

Grian wants to know if he’ll ever get out of here. Cthulhu says it’s possible but not likely but also not really no.

Sam wants to know why they can still hear the school bell inside the weird room they’re in. Cthulhu says it’s a pocket space and they’re technically still in the classroom. Grian thinks this is bullshit and Cthulhu is just Saying Words.

Grian wants to know: “How do I kill Sam?” Cthulhu says: “You can’t.”

Also, the rainbow-hair shadow person is Nyarlathotep, the Crawling Chaos. Sam and Grian start bullying her.

They transport themselves back to the classroom, and Cthulhu and Nyarlathotep come with them, because they want a front row seat to the world’s destruction. Also, Grian is jealous that Sam gets to be a horseman of the apocalypse and he doesn’t.

Sam is now threatening to destroy the universe when his friends are mean to him. Grian tries to call his bluff. There is a very ominous sound of thunder, but nothing else really happens.

Dr. Nurse has apparently gotten tired of Grian bugging him about “learning” all the time, so he’s taking the class on a field trip inside an ambulance. They’re going to see a car crash!

EPISODE 39 – CAR CRASH!

They arrive at the car crash. There is a man covered in blood standing in front of a burning car. He’s actually mostly fine, but the guy he crashed into, on the other hand, appears to have been… decapitated. Death is beautiful, remarks Cthulhu.

Oh, apparently the other guy is not fine, his organs feel squishy. Dr. Nurse gives him CPR. He dies.

Dr. Nurse gets a report of screaming… at Kurokuma’s house. Kurokuma claims he was just listening to Screamo. They can hear the screams. Once again, no one pays any attention to Grian’s protests. He doesn’t protest very much.

Then they all rush off to help Doughboy open a jar of pickles. Grian is pretty ticked off.

They go back to school for lunch. Grian reveals he took something from Cthulhu’s pocket dimension called a “Sleeping Chaos Potion”. He’s contemplating drinking it. Sam, of all people, points out that it’s probably a bad idea to drink something called a Sleeping Chaos Potion, but he still ends up chanting “chug” alongside everyone else.

Grian drinks the potion, and starts taking damage. Cthulhu says he’ll be fine, there will just be some “lingering side effects”. “If you have dreams about the world exploding, let me know.” This surely won’t have consequences! (But really, as far as I’ve been able to glean there aren’t actually any consequences for this within the canon of Tokyo Soul. I, however, can think of plenty of consequences!)

Also I feel like it’s worth noting, it turns out that Geode milking Dom way back however many episodes ago must have been accomplished with some sort of mod, and not by just hitting him and quickly swapping a pre-prepared bucket of milk into Geode’s hotbar as I has assumed, because every time someone hits someone else while holding an empty bucket, said bucket becomes a bucket of milk named “[username of the person who was hit]’s Milk”. I just thought you should all know that, because I am completely baffled by the fact that they chose to do this and then leave the mod on the server instead of doing a much easier classic filmmaking trick, for what was supposed to be a one-off gag. Anyway. I just had to get that off my chest.

Anyway they’re in gym class and Cthulhu wants Sam to kill Invader. He kind of sounds like a dad at his kid’s soccer game, except instead of soccer it’s the destruction of Earth.

Another Anime Alien has landed on the track behind the school. Sam shoots him and he dies.

Okay so I’m now coming back to this after God knows how long and also after a Very Long Day so I am very tired. We will see how this affects the Energy.

Where were we. Ah, right, this was supposed to be Jerry’s gym class. He’s at a bit of a loss. Jerry is one of the most reasonable and responsible people in this show honestly. Like, he’s trying. No One Else in this school is trying.

Students: So, what do we do for gym class now? Jerry: "Uh. Play?"

Also one of the students falls in a hole and everyone else starts badgering them with the milk buckets and the fishing rods that sound like guns. What is with these people and just leaving weird shit on this server that isn’t supposed to be there? It does add to the Atmosphere, I’ll give it that.

Episode 40 – KILL THE MINION!

Professor Geode has claimed all the unused classrooms as His House. Well, specifically his Holiday Home. He also has a Shop. Grian points out that it’s all very clean for Geode. He finds this suspicious.

Geode has an indoor yard. With sheep. And a Minion. The sheep are also robots?

Geode’s plan for today’s class is to dissect the Minion. Also, Google Docs is still trying to autocorrect “Geode” to “God”.

Geode bloodily slices from the Minion: A Watermelon Slice. A Single Rose. The Minion Energy Core (he’ll save this for later). A Bucket Of Milk. Numerous Garbage Bags. A Potion Bottle Of Blood. More Cores. And A Skull. Sam speculates whether the skull means that the Minion ate a human alive, and then simply assumes it does mean that. Geode then kills the Minion.

Grian wonders if Geode has been learning what friendship is. Taurtis looks directly at the sun.

Taurtis: "Do you ever wonder if we’re alone in the universe?" Grian: "NO."

Oh, Jerry has stolen Geode’s TV. Now I know I just said Jerry is one of the more reasonable characters but I fucking love Jerry and Dom’s TV Saga so he can steal as many TVs as he wants.

Sam remembers that Taurtis technically won a spaceship that morning, so they go over to the soccer field and break into it. The ship pranks them with a fake self destruct sequence, and then the boys accidentally take off for Planet Canada.

And then it’s…… the end of the day, but not the end of the episode? But it seems like it’s still the end of the recording session because they’re now making an excuse for why Grian isn’t there and going off to do some whole other plot? And I’ve decided this is too confusing for this late at night so I’m calling it here for now.

Okay I’m back. Let’s see… Taurtis’s hair is growing back in weird patches because he’s been using a suspicious hair growth serum, Grian got left in Canada and Sam blames Taurtis because the spaceship is technically his.

Taurtis: "He’ll be fine, he’s with Nick- oh, God, you’re right." Sam: "He’s screwed, dude!"

Regardless, Sam has decided that he wants to be a superhero too.

They go downstairs, where the house is covered in “totally not stolen” appliances. Like, not just TVs, there’s also ovens, landline phones, refrigerators, an entire streetlight, and Taurtis’s locker. Apparently this was Jerry and Doughboy’s doing.

Dom seems to be dressed up as some superhero I haven’t heard of. Oh, he’s Rorschach from Watchman apparently.

Some sort of robot appears and says it has come for the “bald one”. It’s here to kill Taurtis before he becomes too strong. It was also sent by someone called “The Steampunker”.

Episode 41 – MEETING SUPER HEROES!

Sam and Taurtis tell the robot to shut up while they argue about which one of them should be the sidekick. The robot starts speaking in binary and then attacks Taurtis, who kills it. Sam and Taurtis continue their argument.

Sam says he’s “contacted” some superheroes and takes Taurtis to meet them. Also, Alex Minecraft is just, like, There and walking around. Wait, there’s some Steves too, a weirdly high amount of people just don’t have custom skins on in this recording session apparently.

They meet up with Sam’s superheroes at a coffee shop. There are also two Inconspicuous Bald Men at the coffee shop. Oh also one of the “superheroes” is Old Kurokuma, currently under the name “Kuma the Lion”.

The other superhero is called Captain Radiator or Luke, I assume he’s meant to be a reference to something but I have no idea what. But he’s wearing a yellow hazmat suit.

Sam wants his superhero name to be “The Strongest in All the Universe and the Leader of All”.

Kurokuma is still a creep.

Sam: "Okay, well my superpower, is… that… Taurtis! He- he neeed me. In the time of need."

Sam is also still insisting that he can destroy the universe because Cthulhu said so. Taurtis continues to doubt this.

Sam is given a superhero outfit. It is a rabbit costume.

Taurtis: "How do you defeat people like that? Do you like, jump on their head like Mario?" Sam: "I kill them with cuteness! And this 50-caliber sniper rifle."

Ah, the Inconspicuous Bald Men are holding up the superstore.

Episode 42 – SUPER VILLAINS!

They attempt to enter the superstore from the roof, but Taurtis misses the jump and gets trapped in an alleyway, so they all just agree to meet him at the front of the store.

Captain Radiator takes off his mask and gives everyone in the store radiation poisoning. It is unclear what this actually accomplishes.

Also, The Steampunker has appeared outside the superstore. He’s captured Invader and wants the heroes to meet him in a warehouse at midnight. The heroes just go there immediately.

Then they spend a Good Five Minutes trying to think of a superhero team name.

Captain Radiator tries to give the robots radiation poisoning, but fails, because they’re robots.

Oh also Invader is just kind of dangling above a vat of goo that supposedly will turn her into a robot. She doesn’t seem particularly distressed or anything though.

Taurtis volunteers to take Invader’s place because he thinks being a robot would be cool. Sam thinks this will put Taurtis under the Steampunker’s control, so they should kill him first. The Steampunker says the robot goo won’t work if he’s dead. Sam decides this means he can take the Steampunker’s place after they kill him and then he’ll be the one to control Robot Taurtis. Taurtis says he’d rather be controlled by the Steampunker.

Anyway, I think they eventually decide they want to kill the Steampunker after all, because Taurtis decides he wants to fight on the edge of the goo vat (because it’d be cool)... and the Steampunker punches him into the goo.

Episode 43 – KILL ME!

Taurtis breaks out of the vat and kills the Steampunker (he tried to let Sam kill him, but Sam failed). Then they try to get Invader down, but accidentally drop her into the vat. And it seems like her face is melting off, so Sam et al. run out of the warehouse like cowards.

Cthulhu shows up to tell Sam how proud he is of him for killing more people and melting a girl’s face off. Nyarlathotep gives everyone Mountain Dew. Cthulhu insults Taurtis’s hair, so Taurtis tries to punch him, it doesn’t work, and Cthulhu electrocutes him with a bolt of lightning.

Sam and Taurtis break into someone’s house and sneak out the back door, so Kurokuma doesn’t find out where they live. It doesn’t work, because they forgot they live with three other people who have no idea what the fuck they’re trying to do.

Dom, Jerry, and Doughboy are just living their best TV stealing lives and I support them.

Once AGAIN they are starting a new day in the middle of an episode and it’s really throwing me off my rhythm!!

Anyway. Taurtis has changed out of his One Punch Man outfit, and he’s in the kitchen angrily trying to make breakfast because, according to him, someone sent him a letter saying that if he didn’t make food, he’d be “fired”. I think it’s implied that Sam sent this letter, and that Taurtis knows this, and that Sam knows Taurtis knows this? But who honestly fucking knows with Sam.

Grian walks in! Apparently he’s “just been in orbit for a while”. He’s very confused about why there are so many appliances in the house. He also acquired his own spaceship somehow, and parked it on the roof.

Is it more interesting if the spaceship simply fell out of orbit directly above “Tokyo”/navigated there on its own automatically, implying that there is some supernatural force keeping Grian trapped there, or if Grian decided to go back there himself? Discuss. I could go either way, honestly, although I would like to find a way to have both, ideally.

Oh, apparently the context behind “Taurtis angrily making food or else he’ll be fired” is that it was something CC!Sam decided he wanted to do like right before filming the scene. “And then you can poison my food or something.” The more you know!

Thank God this episode doesn’t end in the middle of anything honestly.

Grian Trauma Count!

Deaths Witnessed:

Anime alien

Lots of minions

He didn’t actually witness the death, but he did see the decapitated body, so, Car Crash Victim Number the First

Car Crash Victim Number the Second

Grian seems pretty sure whoever was in Kurokuma’s basement died

Anime Alien The Second

Minion

Listen he had to get that second spaceship somehow

Injuries Sustained:

Basically anytime the guns come out I assume he gets shot a few times

Traumatic Events:

Subjected to another one of Sam’s shady friends

A somewhat all-powerful evil being tells him that Sam is going to destroy the world, there’s no way out of this town for him, and he can’t even kill Sam about it

Kurokuma

Sleeping Chaos Potion (even if there are no consequences in the canon series, it did still definitely hurt)

Look, he didn’t seem all that shaken up by the Minion Dissection, but I think it should still count

Got left in Canada. Again.

Next Time... Grian Pushes Someone Into A Big Hole

[thirdtimed]

does anyone want to read me poorly describing the events of third life through grian's pov for my friend's benefit. do note that Its long. and bad.

its like. Okay.

act 1

guy is responsible for this worlds first original sin (murder) (he didnt mean it) (quite literally was just a prank gone horrifically wrong)

immediately tries to make it up to the guy he killed (scar) by pledging one of his own lives as surrogate/a symbol of allyship, albeit temporary-- he'll do all of scar's bidding, but only until he finally dies in turn. only then will the debt be considered repaid

its like. so vitally important to me that the materials & conditions for this arrangement. were quite literally Only grians idea. scar did not input any of this at all. grian dug himself a hole in the ground and refused to get out

he is stuck in a hole and its all his fault but hes blaming everyone else thats not him & hes very much not enthused about this partnership. at all. even if hes the one who decided this. even if he's the one who buried himself in the ground. because the guy he's now indebted to is a madman & makes more enemies than friends & quite frankly is just a dangerous man to be around in general. especially for a survival game. so he complains for the entire duration of their alliance that he does not want to be here & that he is only sticking around out of moral obligation and guilt. he doubly makes sure everyone else around him knows this too, letting them know how utterly pathetically powerless he is in this dynamic, as if he were a damsel needing to be rescued.

act 2

scar quickly loses his remaining lives, rendering him an infamous red name-- aka on his last life-- aka his primary objective has now switched to killing other players. he is hostile, and he is the only hostile on the server. this also means that grian is Really stuck with him now. green life players like him are supposed to be peaceful, nonviolent, and notably Far Away from their only known natural predator-- red names-- for the sake of their own survival. but green life players are also supposed to be allied with other green lives. grian is Still contractually obliged to do scars bidding. the debt has not yet been repaid.

so scar parades around the server intimidating other factions into obedience or swindling them out of resources & has grian do the equivalent of a sad little grunt worker weakly holding a gun to everyones head. he's sadly telling everyone "look, i dont have a choice, i owe him my first life; i may not be able to pull the trigger but i can still give him the gun."

meanwhile he has the gun trained on them constantly and has not once ever actually taken it off of them

see like. heres the thing. what makes grian so fun as a character is the guilt obviously but also the fact that he is Relishing in this newfound power he now has as proxy to scar's red name. "i cant kill" he says, as he goes to eagerly prepare traps and tnt explosions, "im just doing scar's bidding" he says, pointedly not mentioning how the traps were very much not scar's idea but His

he takes. so much glee. in the red life power association. he gets so many "indirect" kills as just a green name. hes a menace. and he gets to point to his creditor to avoid all blame

war breaks out and they somehow manage to survive the wreckage. all the while grian is still adamant about leaving once he loses his first life. he takes every possible moment to remind scar that this alliance is temporary-- its conditional, and he's more than ready to fly free once the cage is unlocked and open

its so fun. Because he says all this ^ REPEATEDLY. ad nauseum. i cannot stress this enough. but all his actions point otherwise. he's constantly checking up on scar making sure he's still alive. the red name may give scar prestige but its a very tenuous fragile source of power-- he's on his last life. once he dies for a third time he'll be gone for real. and grian, despite all his complaints and airs of reluctance, does everything in his power to keep scar alive. "im going to leave" he says. "once my debt is paid im out" he says, all while bandaging scars wounds. all while detailing plans that explicitly position scar in the safest area possible on the battlefield (putting him in the bunker, because his life is "too valuable.") Like Okay. Sure. Sure.

act 3

obviously. grian eventually dies. during that exact battle too, the one he painstakingly orchestrated to light up the desert in countless explosives. dies by his own hand, really, wounded by his own explosives, caught in his own trap, the tiniest final strike being a swift enemy arrow to the head. he loses his first life & his debt is at last repaid. the cage is open! you have the key. you can fly. you can leave.

obviously. he doesn't leave.

he doesnt leave because he still has a sense of "moral obligation" <- (quote) he doesn't leave because scar is "the most interesting… [significant pause] Character. on the server" <- (quote) he doesn't leave because he wants to see this til the end

well. to the end he will see it.

numbers have dwindled. theres only 3 people left. and of those 3 people, only one of them remains with a significant leg up, having only died Once throughout the entire season thus far; two red eyes predatorily stalking the only yellow name left

yeah. betrayal. or, "betrayal" if you consider it as such. though it's another person's blade, it's clear as day that scar is the one who ordered it-- who killed him, really.

logically of course its the only decision that makes sense-- you have to even out the playing field. this way, everyone is a red name & on equal footing now. this way, we can finally talk.

this does Not. mitigate the sting of hurt & betrayal on grians end. after all that we've been through? after all that i've done for you? & worst part is that he Feels like this but also Knows, logically, this is the only way it could have possibly played out. he should have known. betrayal and lies and deceit is scar's very nature. he's watched him this entire time. of all people, he should have known.

he goes in with blind rage screaming "traitor!" he doesn't notice the secretive glances scar shares his way, he doesn't notice the whisper leaving his lips in a hushed, "i have a plan." he is angry, he is hurt, and he is done caring about anyone.

in the midst of that chaos, of the sun going supernova, the last person dies without so much of a fanfare. all of a sudden, its only the two of them left.

and as grian raises his sword, scar simply lowers his head. "you may slay me." <- (quote) "for everything that you've done" <- (quote) he's so utterly willing to lay down his life. after all, its a debt owed. for all that grian has done for Him……

grian obviously sputters to a stop. " i cant do it" <- (quote) "i literally cant do it" <- (quote). mind you this is all being executed with about as much drama as any other youtube minecraft letsplay meaning none at all. theyre giggling and laughing because its all just so ridiculous and funny. theyre roleplaying but also not but also aware that theyre roleplaying and cant help but laugh at themselves for it. It is not nearly as angsty as i am actually describing it even though what i have described is Literally What Happened (albeit with a dramatic flare or two there. but still)

theyre at an impasse. they dont want to kill each other. but there can only be one winner. the ghosts chant for a bloodbath-- a barebones fist fight to the death

they decide to do it at the tattered remains of what used to be their home. that sand castle on the cliffside in the middle of the desert. in a ring of cacti & fire they declare this a double victory before counting down & fighting to the death. and theyre smiling and laughing and giggling while also wailing "im so sorry" "im so sorry"

scar dies. through skill or luck it doesnt really matter. grian wins. congrats man. first winner Ever. survival expert extraordinare. youre king. youve demolished the cage. your wings are unbound (theyve been unbound this entire time)

you've won.

"i dont feel good about this at all" <- (quote)

he wails & apologizes to scar (to nothing, to no one) & promptly thanks the audience for watching. video over! season over! thank you so much for watching. none of us would have ever expected the direction this has gone in.

good morning, and case i dont see you……

he ends the video by jumping off the cliff.

hey! so about that bird that wailed and screamed and cried to be set free and once you opened the cage he locked the door back himself and threw away the key

hey so About that bird that took to the sky & very much did not fly

[scribbling-dragon]

for the fic requests: i’ve personally been kind of craving a grian & jimmy siblings fic that isn’t all like the “wholesome” or overprotectiveness that i see a lot in the tag, sibling relationships can be pretty nasty but still have that underlying affection or familarity to each other because of shared life experiences etc,, i think a dynamic like that (especially in any of the life series with the added stress of being in a death game, you can choose whatever setting tho because i think those two are just Inherently Fucked Up) would be cool to read about if you’re up for it

are you really siblings if you don't try and kill each other on the regular?

summary:

“Nah, most he’d do is scam you out everything valuable you own.”

“And leave me for dead.” He finishes.

“Well, I never said anything about you not dying to something stupid, just that Scar wouldn't kill you.”

“Wow,” he mutters, “what care and concern from my dearest older brother, truly, I have never felt more loved in my life.”

(ao3 link)

(2,080 words)

(reblogs are also appreciated <3)

The sand shifts beneath his feet as he steps onto it. The grains immediately worm their way into his shoes, through some strange impossibility that should mean that sand shouldn’t currently be in his shoes. There’s no way for sand to be in his shoes, yet he can find the grains itching at his feet almost immediately- within seconds of stepping foot onto the first patch of sand.

He grumbles under his breath, stepping further and further into the desert, squinting his eyes against the offensive sun that does its best to blind him the moment he looks up. The sand continues to sink around his feet, grains worming their way into his shoes and sticking to his feet.

It’s Grian’s stupid fault for choosing to live in such a hostile environment- seriously, there were so many better places for him to pick to live in and yet he chooses a desert? The man’s supposed to be smart, or something, and yet he chooses the biome that is potentially the most hostile to beings living in it (other than, maybe, an ocean. Choosing to live in the middle of the ocean is also a pretty stupid idea, but he’s also pretty sure Grian’s done that too). Maybe the man isn't so deserving of the clever title everyone gives him; maybe he’s just an idiot.

He glances up again, taking his chances with being blinded by the sun to see how much further he has to go. Monopoly Mountain still looms on the horizon, a seemingly insurmountable distance away. It feels as though he’s hardly made any progress with his journey across the desert, and the constantly shifting sand beneath his feet does nothing but add to the nightmarish trek.

He begins to curse Grian out beneath his breath.

“Now that’s just plain hurtful.” He startles, twisting to face the new arrival.

Grian’s perching on a nearby cactus, hand lightly resting on the top of it for balance. His talons curl around one of the arms of the cacti. It doesn't look at all comfortable, and Jimmy hopes he’s picking cacti spines out of his feet for the next week.

“You chose to live in a stupid place.” He complains. “Seriously? What’s wrong with a- a nice forest? Somewhere that’s not this hot or difficult to walk through!” He kicks at some of the sand, which only succeeds in shifting it slightly and adding to the slowly growing desert in the base of his boots.

“It’s for exactly that reason we chose to live here, Tim.” Grian cocks his head to the side. “Don't exactly want everyone wandering on past our base, especially not with so many red lives running around.”

“Hardly anyone’s going to be running past your base with Scar there.” He scoffs. He’s almost tempted to kick at the sand again, but that’d do nothing but make him more annoyed at the existence of a desert. He pledges to himself, then, that he shall never set foot in another desert unless it is with the sole purpose of eradicating every grain of sand from within it. Can't be a desert without any sand, can it?

“Or me.” Grian grins. “More than a few people are wary about me after that enchanting table trap.”

“You give yourself far too much credit.” He laughs. “I was the one that set that trap off- it didn't even work. Everyone overestimates how far you plan ahead.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah,” he responds. This desert really is far too hot, he can feel the grains of sand beginning to collect between his feathers. Something which is going to be a pain to get out once he’s returned home and is safely away from this hellspawn of a biome. “You don't plan ahead at all.”

“Don't I?” Grian tries to sound surprised, raising his eyebrows in an exaggerated manner. It’s done with the sole intent of irritating him. And it works. Irritatingly. Grian just knows how to get under his skin, managing the feat with nothing more than a few expressions and carefully spoken words.

“No,” he can feel his feathers begin to fluff up a little, “you don't. Have you even thought about how this is going to end? About how all of this is going to end? Because I know you haven't, you never think that far ahead, never beyond the next trap or prank you're planning on pulling, hm? What happens when your contract with Scar runs out? What happens if he’s the one to kill you? What happens if you're the one to kill him?”

“It won't come to that.” Grian frowns at him, wings twitching. The hints at his annoyance are subtle. Everything about him is subtle, subtle up until the point where it is not, and you're left wondering where all of the sudden annoyance came from. “It won't.”

“But it might.” He shrugs. “What happens if you and Scar beat each other to death, hm?”

“The same thing that will happen if you and Scott beat each other to death, Tim,” Grian looks at him. “You die, and you move on. Game over, you go home.”

“And everyone else forgets this even happened in the first place.” He says, shoulders sagging. “Everyone goes home, none the wiser. As though they never disappeared in the first place, because it’s so easy for you to do that.”

“You make it sound like I enjoy that.”

Jimmy sighs. “I know you don't. But you don't think about these things. How are you meant to stop yourself from getting hurt if you don't think about it?”

“Isn't that what you're here for?” Grian asks. He hops down from the cacti, stretching his wings out as he lands. The wingspan is far larger than he normally has, tawny brown feathers so different from the usual bright reds and yellows of his wings.

His own are the same as they've always been. Unchanging. The bright yellow remains unaffected by whatever magic forces Grian to adapt- he’s not sure what he’d prefer; the unchanging warning of his own wings, or being forced to adapt with each different server, changing as he moves between them. 

“And here I thought you actually appreciated my company.”

“Of course not,” Grian scoffs. “Now, what was it you needed? Unless you just felt like complaining at me.”

“Uh,” why was he in the desert in the first place? He hadn't done anything remarkable that day, certainly nothing that he would have decided to trudge out here to inform their allies of- “Oh! Scott wants more sand, says our supplies are running low.”

“And he sent you to do it for him?”

“He’s doing enchants,” he says. “You know I can't do those very well.”

“Oh I am aware.” Grian laughs. “Your attempts are still as messy as when you were ten, I take it?”

He grumbles in response, which only prompts Grian to laugh more even though it isn't really that funny.

“Sand?” He prompts, when he realises Grian’s just going to keep laughing at him. At this rate, he’s going to pass out from a lack of oxygen, or the heat getting to him, before Jimmy can even secure the goods and been on his merry way back to his distinctly not sand-filled home.

“Yeah, yeah, c’mon,” Grian beckons him to follow, and he does, falling into step behind him. Grian moves with ease across the landscape, somehow managing not to sink into the sand as deeply as he does. Maybe it’s something to do with not wearing boots, though he’s certainly not about to risk burning his feet to test it- he’d rather Grian doesn't laugh at him anymore. “I don't see why you couldn't just dig up some of the edges, why come all this way to find me?”

“I'm not about to die because Scar found me digging up part of the desert.”

“He wouldn't kill you for it,” Grian sighs.

“Uh, yes he would. Have you met the man?”

“Nah, most he’d do is scam you out everything valuable you own.”

“And leave me for dead.” He finishes.

“Well, I never said anything about you not dying to something stupid, just that Scar wouldn't kill you.”

“Wow,” he mutters, “what care and concern from my dearest older brother, truly, I have never felt more loved in my life.”

“Oh, knock it off,” Grian nudges him far harder than necessary, pushing him into a small pile of sand that flies up as he kicks it, getting in his eyes and his mouth. He spits the sand out, feeling the grains catch in his teeth as he grimaces.

He stumbles after Grian, just to shove him back, watching him stumble slightly, teetering a little to the side. Grian shoves him back, as though Jimmy’s own shove wasn't revenge already.

He jabs an elbow into Grian’s ribs in return, digging into the spot he knows is especially sensitive after Grian cracked three ribs while attempting to fly for the first time. Grian shouts, loud and wordless, which is all the warning he gets before Grian leaps at him, shoving him down into the sand.

“Grian!” He cries. He can feel sand nestling amongst his hair, digging into his feathers. “Hey, hey!” He shoves at Grian, attempting to dislodge the avian. It doesn't work, and they simply end up rolling around.

Grian kicks at him, talons scratching down his trousers, no doubt ripping his jeans- something he’s going to have to explain to Scott later, no doubt. He kicks right back, shoving at Grian’s face as he goes to bite him, shoving him away until he’s at a safe enough distance that he won't - literally - go for the jugular.

Grian licks his hand.

He pulls it back with a shout of disgust, kicking at Grian hard enough to dislodge him, scrambling to his feet before Grian can lunge at him.

“What was that for!” He yells, hopping back a step when Grian still looks tempted to lunge for him.

“You jabbed me!” Grian yells back, gesturing wildly with his arms. His wings flap too, stirring up the sand and stinging at his eyes.

“And you tried to bite me!” He doesn't shriek- he doesn't. Grian is a known liar, so even if he does go around snitching on him, not that he shrieked in the first place, no one’s going to believe him. “How many times have I told you not to go for the throat!”

“How many times have I told you not to elbow me!” Grian shrieks back at him. “I wouldn't have to bite you if you didn't elbow me!”

“You shoved me first.” He crosses his arms. His wings twitch behind him, feathers ruffling as he tries to dislodge as much of the sand as he can.

“And? It’s my desert.”

“It’s not your desert.”

“Uh, yeah it is?” Grian tips his head to the side. “I live in it. It’s my desert.”

“Whatever,” he throws his hands up, turning around. “I give up! Keep your stupid sand!”

“What are you gonna tell Scott?” Grian yells after him. He ignores him, stalking across the sand, gritting his teeth every time it slips beneath his feet.

When he does arrive back at their base, Scott is still enchanting, nose deep in one of the books and glasses perched precariously on the edge of his nose as he leans forward to read it, quill and ink set aside for the moment.

He looks up as Jimmy enters, eyes widening in surprise at the state of him.

“What happened to you? You look like you had a fight with a bucket of sand and lost.”

“Grian.”

“Ah,” Scott nods his head along sagely. “That certainly explains why you've come back dripping sand, yet seemingly lacking in it.”

“It just wasn't working out,” he waves Scott off. “I'm going for a lie down.”

“Alright,” he nods, watching his husband go. One of his trouser legs was torn, as though it had been ripped to shreds by a wild animal, or a particularly vicious bush. He has a feeling it was neither of those, though. He supposes he must give Grian credit where credit’s due, though he’s not sure what the man gets out of beating his brother up.

It simply makes him all the more glad to be a single child; he can't imagine the hassle of having a brother that seems hellbent on killing you at every turn.

[tatertato]

life series smp winners playlists part 2

we're back! for those who don't know, i'm putting together songs that i think fit each of the life series winners, and they're either songs i've seen work really really well in animatics already or songs that would probably work really well, but are less popular or not associated with this fandom (yet)

i'll be linking+listing them here as well as providing little snippets of explanation for why i think the song fits, but i don't feel like making actual spotify playlists or smth, so if anyone else wants to do that, be my guest.

i still had trouble finding good songs for some of them (this one especially)- if anyone seeing this has a good idea that i missed, lmk and i'll update these posts (no promises tho)

pt 1 (3L!Grian)

pt 3 (DL!Pearl)

Last Life: Scott

Boss Bitch - Doja Cat: alright, kickin it off strong! picked this song for the gaslight gatekeep girlboss energy and little else

Yeah, ain't tryna be cool like you Wobblin' around in your high-heeled shoes I'm clumsy, made friends with the floor Two for one, you know a bitch buy four And two left feet, you know I always drop (this line because of this post and this post alone)

I'm a bitch, I'm a boss I'm a bitch and a boss, I'ma shine like gloss (need i say more)

Said, I took it and I ran for it I won it then I stand on it (NEED I SAY MORE)

2. Two - Sleeping at Last: as i mentioned i had some trouble finding songs for scott since i dont watch his pov too often, so some of these are less exclusively last life and more just his character in general. that being said, i do feel like this still fits to an extent for LL!Scott

Sweetheart, you look a little tired When did you last eat? Come in and make yourself right at home Stay as long as you need (this is scott's total eldest sibling energy, always helping and trying to be friends before anything- ex: taking in cleo, being friendly to scar)

You know I'll take my heart clean apart if it helps yours beat (this applies more after last life, see: the many many many times he offers to sacrifice himself, but also the fact that he refuses to betray his friends as the boogeyman)

Like a force to be reckoned with A mighty ocean or a gentle kiss I will love you without any strings attached And what a privilege it is to love A great honour to hold you up (very representative of scott's trust and loyalty to his allies in every series, through both chaos and peace)

3. Constellations - The Oh Hellos: at first this one was only here for the star symbolism, but after listening to it a couple more times it does fit pretty well (also the oh hellos is very scottagecore)

'Cause like constellations a million years away Every good intention, every good intention Is interpolation, a line we drew in the array Looking for the faces Looking for the shapes in the silence (despite all his efforts to maintain alliances throughout the series, everything inevitably falls apart in the chaos of the finale)

Like constellations imploding in the night Everything is turning, everything is turning The shapes that you drew may change beneath a different light And everything you thought you knew Will fall apart, but you'll be all right (LL was really the only series in which they made a point to isolate the reds- in DL, there was always a pair, and alliances stayed solid despite name color in LimL and SL- but in LL, alliances could be torn apart so quickly, loyalties constantly changing which made it hard to trust others and that shows why scott's loyalty stood out)

4. How to Be a Heartbreaker - Marina and the Diamonds: this is another one that isn't exclusively LL, i just had to put one in abt scotts many ex's.

Rule number one is that you gotta have fun But, baby, when you're done, you gotta be the first to run Rule number two, just don't get attached to Somebody you could lose (i see these "rules" kind of as lessons learned from each season instead, like things he tells himself he'll do next time, but because of his loyal and caring nature, never can)

How to be a heartbreaker Boys they like the look of danger We'll get him falling for a stranger A player, singing I lo-lo-love you At least I think I do (really like i said, a play on the ex's)

5. The Garden - The Crane Wives: here it is, the obligatory crane wives song

Put your ear to my heart or set your teeth against my throat Give me something pretty to wear beneath my blood-stained clothes (something abt this line is just very scott to me)

Lay me down Pour the dirt into our bed Tell the crows They can have their pound of flesh The ghosts at the window echo all our quiet prayers When they come for us, they'll come with hammers and nails My darling, the devil knows my name My name My name (this comes from the things i've seen about how the watchers hate scott, the watchers here symbolized as "the crows" and "the devil")

6. A Terrible Ride - Lizard Boy: this one is an animatic recommendation! here's the animatic -also i think this is applies to most of the winners very angst

I used to be calm But now this ticking bomb is gonna go off (the way he goes after ren for revenge after pearl's death)

I fought and fought hard And I could've died But I got scarred A terrible ride Ride This game was not fun I thought it was right Because I won Was it worth the fight? Fight? (WATCH THE ANIMATIC)

Written in the starss This could have been ours (what can i say, im a sucker for the star symbolism)

and that's all for scott! DL!pearl coming soon!

[frozenjokes]

what is everyone’s love language/how they best express their affection…..iirc you’ve talked abt this in a fic or a post (scar is touch, cub is qualitt time, i forget grian) but i want to hear it Again!!! this has nothing to do w any fic planning btw :3 i am a normal guy w normal thoughts and behaviors all the time

(side note — if we genderbent/hit all of them with the lesbian ray, would you be chill w that? don’t wanna write stuff abt them and then you just feel weird abt it 🫶)

life would be so much better if they were all girls because then grian could call other women cunts and I wouldn’t have to erase it (enthusiastic yes)

Scar is huge on touch, yes he is the ultimate guy Big Toucher. A lonely Scar will be down on his luck in a fight, say ‘hey what if we chose love instead’ and get his nose broken. If you’re a fan approaching him you are going to Get Hugged. If you’re anyone he remotely knows you’re going to Get Crushed. I imagine the strongest of his hugs are reserved for cubfan135 and skizzleman. I don’t even know if Skizz has been mentioned by name in these fics but he’s there. To me. He does love to bother Grian but he is a little more wary because of the one time when Grian first met Micah (alter ego) Grian told him he has bad hands and Scar has been thinking about the /derogatory/ ever since. Scar does actually have differently textured skin but it’s mostly subtle and probably only something someone who knows him well and/or someone in the middle of a deep extremely autistic mental health crisis would notice. Oops! Grian has no idea btw. He doesn’t even remember saying that. It’s safe to say actually he doesn’t remember most of that night. Quality time is also big for him. He just likes being around people. He probably also enjoys giving gifts, but more in the way of just Paying for stuff. Buying lunch. Stuff like that. It’s mostly a thoughtless gesture because he is aware of One Thing and that is that he has A Lot More Money Than Most People, but something he enjoys. Also making stuff. He likes to make things and he does NOT make them for himself he makes stuff to be Validated. On that grind for ATTENTION. this applies to coworkers as much as it applies to friends and lovers.

Cub is absolutely quality time, you pinned that well. He loves a good *sit in the presence of my friends in complete silence.* parallel play? you’ll kill him with that. I don’t think he or Grian are fantastic at cooking or anything, but Cub enjoys being talked at while he’s making dinner while Grian’s sitting at the kitchen table or vice versa. Just thought about them all doing a puzzle together and how much of a disaster that would be. Cub isn’t nearly as bad of a control freak as Grian is but he would start foaming at the mouth when witnessing Scar attempting to shove two pieces that obviously didn’t go together into one. I think Cub and Grian would get competitive about puzzles. NOT a relaxing activity when they’re doing one together. You know how with cats they each have the Same Food in different bowls but they just HAVE TO KNOW what the other is eating because it MUST BE BETTER. them with different parts of a puzzle. but both of them have resource aggression. They’re having fun. Get them two different puzzles and they’ll play nice. The puzzles can’t be the same piece count thought because then they’ll start racing to finish them first. Both of them know this very well.

Cub isn’t a psych major but I feel like he also expresses that Weirdo Autistic Psych Major Affection with the piecing people out and puzzling out all the different aspects of their personality into boxes and lists. He is studying you. This fuck isn’t just ’spacing out in your direction’ he is looking directly at you and wondering what your fucking problem is. The only exception to this is Grian, only because he’s known Grian for so long that doing this is literally just exhausting. He’s given up. ‘hi, my boyfriend saw you from across the bar and was wondering what the fuck is wrong with you’

Grian I think also has a quality time thing going on but it falls under more of a line of Shenanigans. Guy that LOVES to make a scene. The CuteGuy and HotGuy dynamic appeals to him so much because it’s just drama and fun. Guy that loves to be sneaky with his friends. do. do crime. Start a funny cult with his good friend mumbo jumbo and party alllll night but EVIL. He should really make ocs and start rping with mumbo. Scar would be shit at rp despite spending all of his life playing different character versions of himself he would be so bad. Cub. I don’t know. It doesn’t Quite seem like something he’d be super interested in, but he would listen to Grian talk about his ocs. Shenanigans can also mean arts and crafts. He loves a good arts and crafts. It’s one of the only ways to stop him from being so competitive. Indulge him in his interests and he will kiss you on the mouth. Type of 30 yr old at the sleep over pajama party to suggest prank calling random numbers. Or truth or dare. This cunt would be ALL OVER truth or dare oh my god. He makes me sick. Fun fact, if you want a fun rp idea, putting your whole cast together and making them play truth or dare is Really great. It gets old, but it’s a fantastic once in a while thing.

it’s been an hour help

[amethystfairy1]

(Buckle up, this is gonna be a long one.)

Hi! Hello! How are you? :]

Let me just say, your work is simply incredible.

I've been binge-reading your TTSBC series for a few days now, as you can probably tell from all the kudos (you deserve them!), and I have been going crazy

First of all, I think this was the first Hermitcraft ship fic I've read. Conclusions/thoughts;

1) You've made me a flower husbands fan, great job, I am now obsessed with them

2) the relationship between Scott and Martyn is so precious to me, you have no idea

3) I am now a fan of ALL the relationships you've written; flower husbands, treebark, desert duo, Tango/Zed, Lizzie/Joel, Shelby/ Katherine, Etho/Doc (I hope I didn't forget anyone)

4) PEARL IS A MENACE AND I LOVE HER. SHE IS MY FAVOURITE, YOU HAVE NO IDEA. She is the big sister™ and she is the best

5)Scar is a sweetheart and that is a FACT. HE WAS SO SWEET TO CUB?? AND TO GRIAN?? I LOVE HIM

6) I absolutely love mom Cleo, her and Bdubs are so kind and thoughtful and caring to each other, I will simply explode

7) KATHERINE STRAIGHT UP JUST SAID "nope" AND WENT BACK TO THE UNDER-CITY

8) I need more Scott as a journalist. I need to see his hunger to get all the details. I need to see him use his silver-tongue skills on someone, and I need to see Jimmy(or anyone) be scared but also fascinated. I need to see more Scott and Pearl fighting for the best interview.

I don't even watch cc!Scott, and now look at me. Im obsessed with his character.

9) PESKY BIRDS BEING LITTLE WAS THE CUTEST THING EVER I WILL CRY TEARS OF JOY. SMALL BDUBS?? CHILDREN ARE SO CUTE

10) I also,,, kinda,,, want to see someone react a bit badly to seeing their partner being from the under-city. Maybe,,, Martyn being angry with being lied to? Maybe,,, Scott screaming at him that what he's doing is helping no one? Maybe, maybe,,,,

(im secretly an angst-girlie at heart, what can I say. I love me some good hurt/comfort)

11)JOEL AND LIZZIE'S BACKSTORY IS ALL I NEEDED IN LIFE, I CAN NOW DIE HAPPILY

12) please let zed and tango have a happy ending pleasepleasepleasePLEASEPLE-

13) also the titles have all been so cool! I saw a post of yours that said you use terms of endearment, and I thought that was really cute :)

14) SOUP GROUP

In conclusion, I am crazy for your work, please feed us more.

To show you how crazy I've been over this series;

I went completely nuts, explaining to my friend some basics about it the moment I was sure I've read everything, and Im probably gonna make them read it too. I've already sent them the link to the series.

They are not even a Minecraft fan. They don't know what Hermitcraft is.

Anyway, this was all to say; you're amazing, your work is truly fantastic, your writing style is one of the best I've ever seen/read (and I've read a lot of fics, do not doubt me)

Please don't feel forced to write anything I've said! I'm just throwing ideas that came over my head when reading!

(your traveling thieves series is also amazing! Im just currently full of ttsbc thoughts rn, its eating me alive /pos)

Hope my spam liking was not annoying!

Have a great day!

:D

It was not annoying in the SLIGHTEST!

Hello hello, thank you, thank you! I'm so glad TTSBC has been so enjoyable for you and that you've had fun binge reading all of it!

I am delighted and honored to be the first author you've read that has written Hermitshipping and that you've enjoyed it and it's caused you to love all my ships! That's a great day for a fanfic author!!!

FLOWER HUSBANDS ARE MY FAVORITE! More people who like Flower Husbands? HAPPIER I AM! It is a DIRECT correlation!

Someone commented at some point that they reminded them of drunk girls comforting each other in the bathroom after a party, and I think that's exactly accurate 😆

YES! ALL THE SHIPS!

Pearl is the Big Sister ™️ of the group and if anyone hurts any of her little siblings it is game over!

Scar is SUCH a sweetheart in this AU! He's a superhero, he's a boyfriend, he's a best friend, he's a professor, and he's just doing his best to juggle it all!

Zom-Mom and Sentient Glowstick. Only the best combo!

Katherine said "Wait crap I think that was the love of my life!" and dove back in!"

Journalist Scott will be making a return in several pieces of the future, don't you worry! We'll get to see him strut his stuff! I'm very glad I've gotten you to love c!Scott even if you don't watch cc!Scott, that's just the best!

PESKY BIRRRRRRRBS!

ooooo there's an angsty take. Hm. Well, there is certainly more angst on the docket for everyone, I assure you, and while I can't promise that brand of angst in particular, there is other stuff left to unpack! Please look forward to it!

JOEL AND LIZZE! BUTTERFLY AND CAT LADY! MARRIED FOR OVER A DECADE AND RUNNING A BAKERY! ADORABLE!

Zedango will return! That is all I shall say!

I'm so glad you like the titles! I think it's very cute but I have to admit I'm starting to struggle to come up with terms of endearment I haven't used before 😆

SOUP GROUP

I'm so glad you're trying to get your friend into TTSBC! The nice thing is I don't think it's too terribly difficult to spring into without context of watching any of the CCs because the characters all pretty much explain themselves within the AU. Maybe looking up some fanart for what everyone ought to look like, but it's not the worst thing!

Glad to hear you also like Traveling Thieves! I was gonna point you that way when you said you were an angst girlie so good that you're already there!

Thanks so much for coming by! 💖