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randomnameless · 21 days ago
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Why do we still have in 2024 stupid takes like Rhea created and enforces the crest system?
Bcs Rhea BaD anon.
More seriously,
FE Fodlan is one of one of the most divorced FE verses from its fantasy elements (see : Nabateans being as important as Ignatz's leather shoes) : Tellius has the Laguz existing, Archanea/Ylisse has manaketes hanging around and being a core point in FE Archanea, Elibe has its entire history involving dragons and the best ending finally be about acceptance between the two races, Magvel has zombies, Valentia has terrors and in SoV we have dragons and magic dragon blood, Fates has dragons (and laguz-like!) and even Jugdral have people with magic dragon blood.
(i ranted and ranted and ranted under the cut, so it's a bit long)
Unlike Fodlan, Jugdral's "people with magic dragon blood" are a key element to the story told at large, and it bleeds through the mechanics used to tell that story. FE4 wise, toddler!Seliph has a S rank in swords when Beowulf, even if he trains his entire life, will never achieve A rank in swords. Base!Julia with her holy weapon can smack Loptyr, when max!invested (at least lore wise) Forseti!Ced will never be able to kill him.
It's unfair for Beo and Ced, but that is how the verse works because, in that verse, some people are mc guffins or "the only ones" who are able to do something, or even, straight out, stronger/have more talent than others.
In traditional fantasy settings we have the "same" sort of rules, you have elves who do X and Y, humans won't can't, dwarves who can't either but they can do W, orc who can do J, etc etc.
Even for all of the "deconstruction of the genre!" gimmick ASOIAF has, according to some people, Dany is fire-proof and Jon most likely survives after being assassinated because he is a Stark and can use his doggo as a back up save, both things Edmure Tully will never be able to achieve.
Tolkien has Numenoreans being straight up blessed by the Valar/stronger/longer lived/etc etc than middle-earth humans, on top of also having elves, dwarves and ents.
Ergo : power inbalance is baked in the fantasy genre.
And yet, the writers often manage to tell some version of "the ones who have less power are no less important", like with Tolkien, it's a bunch of hobbits who manage to take down the greatest "evil" of their era, or some message like "having more power/being more important means you are bound to help the ones who have none" thingie.
In Fodlan, the "beings who have more power" than humans are the Nabateans (+ Sothis herself!). Sothis can create life, her daughter - through unknown means - can create artifical beings, one her children can control weather (the one who was turned in a milkshake for Charon!), one of them has monstruous strength (the one turned in a milkshake for Blaiddyd), one of them could communicate with animals (Timotheos iirc - if we assume he was a Nabatean or got his powers from his crest), her granddaughter can set up an AOE to heal what would otherwise be fatal wounds (it's heavily implied this is what Flayn did when she overused her power and went comatose) etc etc.
This is the original power inbalance in Fodlan.
Then some humans "stole" this power from Nabateans, and got a share of it themselves, which is what is later called "crest" : aka, some humans got a part of the super/magic powers that Nabateans originally had and thus, because, for all intents and purposes, "super-humans".
Now, Fodlan discourse started with FE16 being released in 2019, not that long after GoT's ending - which was trash - and in an era where fandom turned from "harmless fun" to "something that looks like activism and earns you point if you manage to use it to express your real life opinions".
In 2019, after Dumb and Dumber tanked GoT and removed most of ASOIAF fantasy parts to deliver "sex that sells" with a moldy plot, some part of the fandom started to conflate and harass people over what they like, and how it, apparently, reflected on their real life opinions ("if you hate this female character it means you hate women!"/"if you think X becoming king is a good ending, you don't value democracy!").
So, we have this fantasy setting with its inherent power inbalance... that quickly became something that is/was unacceptable, because IRL, power inbalance is based on bullshit and something everyone decries - so if your beloved media reflects on what you like IRL, you can't like a setting with an objective power inbalance, even if is justified by magic which doesn't exist irl like shooting eyebeams or some people being more "special than others" who can live up to 1500 years old.
Fodlan's power inbalance, for some parts of the fandom 2019, cannot be justified by traditional fantasy settings so, those settings/fantasy elements are straight out ignored.
Thus the "crests"' magic effects/powers are ignored, and dumbed down to, roughly, what a middle school student would think "nobility" is/was in the Middle Ages/Renaissance.
Jean-François Marie Pierre de Bourbon isn't inherently better at smashing things with a sword than Bob, or at healing than Roger, any "advantage" Jean-François Marie Pierre de Bourbon has over them is, maybe, that he started training earlier.
In Fodlan?
If Jean-François Marie Pierre de Charon has a major Charon crest, he can dance and clap in his hands to summon rain. Bob and Roger, no matter how hard they train, will never be able to do that. Jean-François Marie Pierre de Charon will thus be seen as having higher "value" or being straight up "better" than Bob or Roger, because as long as he is here, your crops will never suffer from drought.
But... we can't have that, because if you confuse fandom and real life opinions and aspirations, you cannot admit that some people in Fodlan are inherently "better" at something, only because of their blood, otherwise, what would it translate to IRL?
This is why, imo, part of the fandom (and the game sure doesn't help! Fodlan is no Jugdral and its gameplay lacks coherence regarding the in-game lore! Remember how Raphael can use a relic and only loses 10HP, when Miklan, plot wise, was turned in a demonic beast?) that loves this take, arguably, reduces crests to a title and family name.
Why should the Bourbon family rule over us, when they're no better than Roger or Bob? Isn't it unfair the Bourbons are still valued nowadays when the only thing to their fame is their name, and not what they are actually doing?
The game plays coy about crests - we know each of them has a specific power - but it never reveals what are those powers (lore wise!) save for 2 of them. So are crests superpowers, or just a family name with a particle, or both? Is the "system" (a friend made a post debunking any idea of "systemic" application of this notion in the three countries) based on bullshit, or on, objective superpowers?
Dimitri tries to tackle the issue, but only around relic usage : the Gautiers are valued if they have a crest because they can use their superweapon to protect the border. But what about valuing House Charon's ability to bring rain and guarantee good harvests? What is the other superpower tied to the crest of Gautier that isn't "use a femur and wreck havoc with it"?
If Marianne's ability to talk to animals is tied to her crest, why isn't it more developed? Instead of having useless shit like talking and befriending horses like a Disney princess, we could have Maurice-blooded people be masters of counter-intelligence, imagine if they can talk to birds/rodents and ask them to scout various areas or spy/ask them what they saw ! Hell, we could have had a situation where in a fog of war map, where Marianne, if, idk, through Billy fed enough animals in the monastery, would have a better field of vision than anyone else, with some blurb/one-line about her relying on the animals around to know and see what is going on! Alas, it wasn't meant to be.
FE16 eludes the question, because the character who "questions" a world centered around "crests" is the marketable asset of the game, and cannot be challenged in any meaningful capacity v- she feels it's unfair that her crest seemingly dictate her life, and only in the gacha game with ery serious writing like the Heavy Plate Corps or Sniddies, does she get a modicum of self-reflection - or at least someone challenging her - where she is told that she could use the superpowers she has to help people instead of blaming the world for getting one.
In a traditional FE setting, where some Lords question why they were born with power/or are in powerful positions, the answer is always that no matter what they were born with (or without in Leif's case!) what is more important is what they decide to do with that power. Elincia never wanted to become Queen? She will still fight and protect Crimea and its people. Marth is the last hope of Altea, even if it means leaving Elice behind. Seliph doesn't want to fight in Thracia anymore or feels like he's a fraud? He can turn tail and return home, while the world around him falls apart. Leif also feels like a fraud because he doesn't have superpowers like his cousin? Does that mean he should turn his thumbs and watch as his people are being caught/enslaved/sacrificed?
In Fodlan you have no reflection like this : Linhardt is, imo, the best example.
Dude hates blood and has a crest (aka magic powers) geared towards healing, you could make a case that for someone who has hematophobia, being a healer is difficult and this would be the reason why he refuses to heal/use his powers to help people around him... but no. Lin's laziness is played for laughs, and his refusal to do anything not related to his topic of interest is never questioned/analysed under the angle of, say, a head nurse who has no crest and laments that she couldn't save everyone who was hurt during an assault, who snaps at him for having the "gift" he has and not using it for the sake of people around him.
"What Lin decides to do with his power?" : Well, nothing.
Instead we have a reflection on his bright mind going to waste if he lazes all day long, culminating in his Supreme support where an Imperial facility is created specifically to cater to his tastes, that will enable him to research crests as much as he wants...
But still, nothing about his innate "healing" power!
In the end, it's no surprise that part of the fandom latched on that "crest = nobility title" because the Fodlan verse refuses to develop anything about its fantasy elements (hell, iirc Nopes swaps "crests" for "blood" and "titles" in its Supreme route ?).
"Sure, but where does Rhea fit in this nonsense?"
Rhea is, in this vision, the ultimate target !
For all of the "I ignore fantasy elements", Rhea is always (in FE16 at least!) turning into a dragon : no matter how hard you want to ignore fantasy, she's here to remind you tht, in this verse, dragons exist.
But most importantly, as Fodlan must be analysed through an IRL lens otherwise modern fandom cannot engage with it, Rhea, by virtue of being the lady in charge of a religious organisation called "Church", is also seen through a lens : Rhea BaD bcs Religion BaD and Catholic Church BaD.
FWIW, thanks to the five years of discourse we had, I learnt more about cultural values and differences existings between, here and the rest of the world - especially a place that is overepresented on fandom spaces - on organised religions especially the catholic church. Of course this bled on fandom takes and analysis, which projected some users' irl bias against the Catholic Church on the fandom organisation and entity that is the Church of Seiros. Combine this with secularism being now weaponised and used to ridicule people in spaces like r/atheism and you have a perfect recipe for "Religion BaD = Catholic Church BaD = fictional organised religion with a catholic flair BaD".
Granted, given how a certain loLcalisation team also originates from this place, it's no surprise that some "creative liberties" they took tried to hammer even more, let it be in the script or the fucking "what is this game about?" page on their website, how this fictional organisation is basically a squenix trope of "evil cult manipulating everything in the shadows and sekritly controlling the world".
Besides, the main heroine of the game (even if that comes with a twist!) opposes this faction (CoS and especially its leader!) and, by the way those games are built, as seen earlier, they cannot disavow her too much, else the entire gut-punch the devs were gunning for (you are betrayed by your beloved character! But unlike what happens in Baten Kaitos, you only are attached to her because she is your avatar's simp) will fall apart. So she must be, somehow, right and not motivated by more personal and heinous reasons, like not accepting "non-humans" to have powers over humans, or thinking the world is not a place for them (this was carefully scrubbed out in Nopes, btw!).
If Supreme Leader, who we are supposed to root for and whom the game ultimately rewards because "reforms" happen in the endings, says that the CoS is the reason why humans value superpowers, she must be right, or at least, not completely wrong???
Which raises the final point on this topic : FE16 came in 2019, which was election year in the US, and we all know that election time in the US means the rest of the world is also affected, even if the rest of the world, well, isn't the US. As I mentionned, the US is over-represented in fandom spaces, and fandom is far from being a safehaven from all the mayhem and passion that always boil during election time and its immediate following.
Coupled with the "my fandom faves define my real life opinions" thingie I already wrote about, and we had an explosive cocktail for bad takes, needless aggressivity, ridiculing people with dissident opinions because they are seen as "wrong", etc etc. And let it be something trendy or not, especially when (young?) people are arguing about "politics" in online spaces, but it always boils down to gross simplification of various complex issues and/or using catchphrases or "shock-value" words to win over whoever is reading/listening.
(et je ne dis pas ça parce que certains de nos politiques font des "immigrés clandestins ou pas" la source de tous les maux, ou le fait que nos députés font la même chose en ce moment, Jonluk et Marine main dans la main, pour paralyser l'Etat afin de pousser Manu à la démission et éviter la case prison pour Marine)
I always thought the "CEO of racism" was a meme, but through Fodlan discourse, I started to wonder if it was something started seriously by someone who really thought that "racism" is caused by one person.
And we finally get to the point : somehow, somewhat, Rhea is supposed to be responsible for people/humans valuing superpowers.
Forget that the same "quest to obtain those superpowers" led to the extermination of her kin, or how the devs themselves explained that people - at least in their setting - always want more power :
As a result, what would happen to humans who gained power... they would want even more power, and find a dragon much stronger to beat in order to collect materials forcefully, in order to make even more powerful weapons... and so that was the cycle that was born. And that was the birth of Fodlan's Ten Elites
Wait, kill that, those superpowers don't exist since the game and the characters (bar Catherine, but I agree with @9thwither here, Cat is one of the most overlooked characters in this fandom!) never talk about them, so they don't exist...
Rhea is thus the reason why people value bloodlines - especially since those bloodlines don't come out with superpowers.
It sounds better and closer to what you could "hear" irl, from someone who's discoursing on the internet to explain "why" some people are more valued than other, it's because of religion and the Pope! It cannot be because of, well, human greed or just the need to have more power (for good or wrong reasons), no.
"But random, the Church most likely promotes a "divine right to rule" doctrine and let the 10 Elites' families rule over their clans in Faerghus thus gain nobility!"
Sure, but everything is moot if you consider this : to make this take viable, we ignore the game and consider that crests are just bloodlines, and not, objective sources of superpowers.
So why are we, discussing about this hypothesis/theory, even arguing about what the game says and/or does?
Bob Blaiddyd can kill a giant lion/wolf with his fists at base level, is it because of a supposed doctrine that people rally and want to be in Bob's graces, or because Bob has the power to protect them all? Karen Charon can summon rain, are people siding with her because Rhea told them to, or because Karen can make crops grow?
In conclusion : why people are still, in 2024, sprouting those takes?
1- Because they refuse to engage with the game and realise that it is a fantasy game belonging to a very specific genre
2- Because fandom opinions reflect on your real life opinions and likes : so they must find a reason to oppose what their perceive as an unacceptable power inbalance otherwise it means that they support the various inequalities that exist IRL
3- Because Religion BaD and bar the "projected takes from transposing feelings about an IRL church on a fantasy one" more and more people tend to prefer an "easy to proceed" solution than think about multi-causal issues and find solutions that might not.
Of course, I can already guess that some people might argue that they don't "refuse to engage with the game" since this take is more a less a condensed version of the Supreme spiel, and as developed above, the game does - willingly - a shit job at demonstrating that her spiel is nonsense (they had to add the "greed" part in an interview released after the game and its only and final DLC!), just like her sockpuppet who supposedly learns how misguided he was in certain routes... only to end with the same ice cream, albeit with a different topping.
However, Dimitri and Sylvain mention how crestless children are disowned in Faerghus... when Dimitri's own uncle is ruling over a domain himself, Ingrid's brothers exist in the background and Gustave is still Baron Dominic's brother, on top of having been the royal master at arms for at least, depending on the route, 3 generations of Faerghan kings.
In a game where Dorothea can blame the Goddess for fighting in a war her bestie started - without anyone pointing this out - it's obvious this verse has unreliable narrators, but after 5 years and having played all routes in both games + a DLC + a dev interview explaining how and why some humans acquired crests...
Tl;Dr :
Reason 1- is most likely the most prevalent why this take exists anon, "because some people refuse to engage with the game" with the added topping of "save for what Supreme Leader and her sockpuppet say that I can use to demonise the characters I don't like".
#anon#replies#fandom woes#trying to sum up the reasons of why the 5 years of discourse happened is... complex lol#this takes encompasses everything#Fodlan and some parts of the fandom's refusal to engage with Nabateans aka the fantasy part of the game#treating crests like a glorified family name or worse a hereditry proof#takes only being meant as gotchas against fellow fans and deriding them for being 'wrong' to the point of harassment#sure the game is as consistent as a marshmallow#but the refusal over 5 long years to engage with what you can chew out from this marshmallow is just#what is even the point of any discussion?#sure lolcalisers lolcalised a lot making some muddled messages even more muddled but#explaining that people value super-powers because someone told them to? Instead of just#people loving Superman because he can protect them and do nifty things?#never underestimate the influence of Church BaD in this fandom anon or in online spaces#not saying we don't have our own edgy r/atheist people here but this is basically taking it to another level#and let's not forget the “my fave is better than yours because he can solve poverty in 2 easy steps” nonsense#and it's fightening how sometimes this can apply to both fandom or real life#'you can cure greed racism and xenophobia by killing this one person'#remember the “CoS is BaD because it instaured a CASTE system????”#top ten of the takes in those fives years lol it wins the “i'm using words i don't know” trophy#Imagine a situation where we could have had Lin refusing to go to the warfront because of his hematophobia#and his superior either Supreme Leader or maybe Billy themselves telling them it's okay to stay behind if they don't want to participate#as long as he doesn't have any regrets if some of his allies who don't return might have been saved by his powers#sure it's assholish but it looks like what F!Lewyn told Seliph#Much like Elincia who breaks down saying she never wanted to be queen#sure she never wanted but now she's there what is she going to do?#blame her father for having been the king ?#FE16
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theabigailthorn · 1 year ago
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Shadowheart and Nocturne sure seem like to be good friends
yup, just two gal pals, hanging out, doing each other's hair in a secret back room, Platonically, fighting alongside one another, writing in diaries about one another, just as friends, sharing memories, as friends though
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ingravinoveritas · 1 month ago
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fandom-chameleon23 replied to your post “"He should be used to this by now." Maybe, just…”
If it was a joke he’d smile or laugh after the glare, but he just looks so angry. It made my heart sink just watching.
@fandom-chameleon23 Likewise. He looks angry, and almost...disappointed. Like he was giving her a chance to just be normal around him, and she couldn't do it. And as you said, had there been that smile or laugh after the glare, that would change the tone of the video drastically...but he stormed off instead. The immediacy with which his expression and body language changed and how he couldn't move away quickly enough as soon as he realized she was recording him said it all...
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stiffyck · 1 month ago
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Still occasionally think about that one online friend who just. Disappeared one day.
I hope wherever they are they're okay....
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samgiddings · 2 months ago
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Yes, people who don’t take it personally when you don’t reply are great, but like, we all understand that that’s a grain of salt thing, right? Like if you ghost your friend back-to-back-to-back when they reach out to you, they’re going to eventually give up. We know that, right?
If you don’t reply multiple consecutive times when someone messages you trying to have a conversation (not just sending a random thought/meme/something casual), you are ghosting that person, and it’s not on them to keep using their energy to reach out to you.
(AND before you come for me just know I say this as someone who is a notoriously bad texter, and who is super bad for remembering to reply to texts.)
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little-pondhead · 2 years ago
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For your villain au, what if Daniel is still a bit unstable an likes to take naps as just a sentient pile of goo. Danny finds this out and keeps a giant breaker in his lab in the DC universe specifically so his daughter could sleep without getting everywhere.
Now imagine some of the heroes break in to his lab while Danny is running errands or something and see this giant breaker of green goop labeled “Daniel” and just assume the worst. Danny comes back to a lab full of hero’s looking ready to murder him with tears in their eyes and calling him a sick bastard and such. Danny is so confused by the angry screaming until they all hear a tired yawn from behind the heroes. They all turn to look at a sleepy, very much alive and semi human Daniel, looking at them from inside the glass and asking her dad what’s wrong. He tells her that everything is fine and that she can go back to sleep. She just shrugs and turns back into goo before the horrified heroes
This, of course, only solidifies the theory that Danielle is a test tube baby created because the Trio wanted a child. I mean, why hire a surrogate when Fenton is a mad scientist in every sense of the word?
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nsfwitchy2 · 5 months ago
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Yeah just to be clear - if you start reblogging posts or posting yourself about how the Russian psyops aren’t real and we’re stupid to believe they were, I’m unfollowing you. Don’t care who you are. That relationship is over now.
Mountains of actual evidence has been provided to show this did happen and continues to happen. I lived through it the first time, I watched it happen, I fell for the propaganda. The multiple posts I’ve seen saying it didn’t happen where their evidence is “just trust me bro tumblr is racist and awful and run by bigots” - that’s not gonna convince me of anything except that you are incredibly susceptible to propaganda, and you’re gonna put it on my dash where I don’t wanna see it.
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kerfuffleddingus · 2 months ago
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I am having thoughts about the canary curse.
So canaries. We’ve all seen the posts. There’s a few that stand out to me, one being that the canaries didn’t actually die (or weren’t supposed to) . The guy that devised the canary method ( John Haldane ) was concerned for the birds welfare, so they had a little machine to revive the bird once it fell over/ stoped singing.
This is what’s happening for the first few deaths in the life series. Everyone’s being revived at this point, no one’s actually dying, but…. No one’s leaving the fucking coal mine.
A key point in using a canary in the first place is that it warns you, tells you hey this place is dangerous stop going!
They keep going.
Jim’s death each season (sans secret life) is the turning point because he’s the first one to permadie.
He’s not the warning. He’s the result of ignoring it.
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isa-ah · 2 months ago
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met a really cool queer stranger today that i thought was just so fucking neat i wanted to talk but if we were playing tennis they were, with the most gentle and earnest voice ive ever heard, shoving the tennis racket down my throat. every compliment or joke i made was turned away but in the sweetest way possible that made me sound like an absolute asshole lunatic. it was so scary.
#i tried so hard to be funny and nice but the way they replied to each thing i said made me feel like a scumbag LOL#ive never had that happen before. im very polite when i talk to strangers and i was being very polite then too!#i dont think they even saw it happening in realtime bc they were so calm and even keeled about it#but my god. still thinking about it. absolutely rattled me.#'ur so cool' 'oh its not the olympics. everyones cool. ur cool too' 'haha ur right yet ur still winning' 'hm. its not a competition.'#i was trying to make you laugh im sORRY i was being goofy when i said that i promise i did not say it straight#'you have so many cool tattoos' 'oh ive got a couple tattoo artist friends' 'oh thats so cool. maybe i could get a foot in the door'#like obviously as a joke but they replied gently 'you shouldnt seek friends out just to get something from them.'#NO I KNOW I KNOW IM SORRY IT HAPPENS TO ME CONSTANTLY I KNOW TRUST ME#i panicked and was like 'oh haha no i wasnt serious dont worry. im an artist so i know the feeling.' but i guess it came across as like#yknow. bc they just went 'hm.' and pulled out their phone#FUMBLED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! im so embarrassed#the worst part was id been talking to someone in the back who makes familiar plushies and shed set a few out#so i was talking to them while i was trying to pull up her insta to look up more info about one of the familiars#bc it looked SO FUCKING COOL and i stood there saying that to my husband right in front of them after this legendary fumble#finally pulled up the insta post for it and. they own that one. its theirs. they dressed it like that. i was so fucking embarrassed skdjfks#i wanted to look at the pricetag bc i assumed it was there bc she HADNT sold it yet#god. legendarily embarrassed.
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leviiackrman · 3 months ago
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Might as well have the salt before the sweet; so here is Rin's Finished Timeline!
Tag list (ask to be added or removed): @carrionsflower @statichvm @risingsh0t @simonxriley @tommyarashikage @kanos @confidentandgood @unholymilf @florbelles @thedeadthree @shellibisshe @roofgeese @aezyrraeshh @faerune @tekehu @jackiesarch @minaharkers @sergeiravenov @carlosoliveiraa @rosenfey @greenecreek @queennymeria @heroofpenamstan @tethrras @jamessunderlandgf @d-esmond @solasan @bigbywlf @delzinrowe @fenharel @imogenkol
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katyspersonal · 1 month ago
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You should stop slopping your drama into people's reblogs. No one cares, and you're the problem.
you: No one cares
also you: *cared so much that your butthurt forced you to send me this message instead of just rolling your eyes and moving on*
youtube
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wormchaser · 3 months ago
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you are complaining about complaining too much while complaining about the fact that maybe people dont like you because you complain too much while complaining about being alone. just stop complaining and do something about it. talk to people. reach out. dont just wait for someone to come to you first.
i have tried reaching out to different people in the past year or so but it never works. i understand its my own fault for letting relationships decay because of my own insecurities and issues but that doesn't mean i can just will myself to think or believe different things about myself. it's a self fulfilling prophecy ; i think people don't like me so i don't reach out so people don't like me etc . i am sure you do not want to hear me list all the things i want to say in response so i will put them in the tags.
#every time i try to reach out or talk to someone it goes nowhere. i dont have any social skills anymore and have no clue how to keep a#conversation going. half the time even when i do people stop replying to me. which is fine theydont owe me a reply but still feels likeshit#when i tried to make one new irl friend it just didn't work because they have better options for friends. we spoke occasionally but never#messaged online like ever and would only talk when we happened to be in the same place. i tried multiple times to organize a time to hangou#none of which came to pass. i dont understand why this one didn't work because i thought this person was interested in being my friend but#i guess i was wrong or thought they were more interested than they really were.#i have a problem with reaching out anyway which has been a problem i have had since i was like 11. reaching out to people first doesnt come#easily to me - in the beginning when i was a lot younger i didn't want to bother people with my presence & thought if i were to come to#someone first they would feel pressured into talking to me when they didn't want to. this is stupid of course. but has still not left me as#something i feel is very core to the way i act today. waiting for someone to come to me first feels like my only option because i do not#know how to reach out effectively (my evidence being i have failed every time i have tried) & i am convinced people dont like me in the#first place and do not want me to approach them.#i dont really even know who to reach out to in the first place. my world is extremely narrow. the number of people i know has shrunk#significantly and my standing in their eyes collectively has also shrunk significantly in the past few years. i feel like every person i#was once friends with wants nothing to do with me. i feel as if i have burned every bridge possible.#when it comes to the fact i complain all the time . which i know of course is annoying. its because i cant find any kind of joy in anything#i do or see or whatever. nothing makes me happy - i only see things to complain about. all stimulus seems grating and the world seems#specifically catered to make me miserable. all i can really do is complain. i treat this blog like a stream of consciousness and when most#of that consciousness is occupied with how much i hate being alive the blog will mostly be complaining. its a vicious cycle lol .#anyway . i guess the key theme is low self esteem begets low self esteem in many ways. mental illness begets mental illness.#i am not really saying this to anyone least of all to you anon. i just felt compelled to recount i guess for myself the reasons that came#to mind for why i am like this. i am talking to myself here
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autisticlee · 4 months ago
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"good people are out there you just need to get out and find them"
cool thanks. but i'm too tired to keep ~going out and looking for them~ i'm too tired to keep trying, using up all my energy, getting super overwhelmed and burnt out after just a couple weeks of trying as hard as I can, met with other people barely trying back or not being very responsive, and needing to recover from it for a year or more each time because it overwhelms and burns me out so bad. I get nowhere no matter how hard I try, all i get is uselesss advice from people i try to befriend who dont want the responsibility of friending me. i'm tired of trying beyond my limits and causing more issues for myself. or dealing with issues I get from meeting the "wrong" people. if the "right" people exist, why can't they find me? why does it have to be only my job? i'm too tired and overwhelmed and burnt out to do it!!!!! the right people will just easily help and be there for me right? so I guess i just have to keep waiting for them for all eternity????? i'm tired of waiting. give me more than "just wait/keep trying/don't give up" because those instructions unclear and my useless attempts are very discouraging and exhausting and i'm so overwhelmed that i'm losing the ability to even socialize at a minimum at all now!!!!
if humans are meant to be social creatures and we require positive interactions with each other to stay healthy, then why do humans ostracize their own? why do some of us struggle so much and are denied any help and instead blamed? why can't I be given advice on how to live a lonely life without anyone else by my side instead of being told "one day! keep trying! you need people because it's essential to being human!" even though i've been waiting for "one day" for 25 years and could wait 25 more, or even longer? I don't know what i'm doing wrong or how to improve it so waiting is all I have. what if I wait forever?
#ive been trying to find “the right people” for like 25 years. im so tired of hearing “one day/eventually”#i need people now. i admit i need help!!! i cant do life alone!!! but ONE DAY is not NOW. im struggling now. not later#why is it always “keep trying because ONE DAY” and never “heres how to deal with it now and if one day never comes”#because NOT EVERYONE GET THEIR “ONE DAY” AND IT FEELS AWFUL BEING GIVEN EMPTY PROMISES#AND IT FEELS AWFUL BEING IGNORED AND DENIED HELP *NOW* BECAUSE EVERYONE WANTS YOU TO REPLY ON A HYPOTHETICAL “ONE DAY”#IM SO SICK AND TIRED OF IT!!!!!!!!#lee rants#what if the “one day” where people actually care isnt until theyre at my funeral huh? because ive seen it happen.#autistic#autism#actually autistic#social problems#social issues#social isolation#adult autism#adult friendships#autism support#autistic friendship#this has been bothering me. i think its called toxic positivity. people throw it at me and it makes me feel worse. stop 😭#and “it happened to me so that means it will happen for you!” no it doesnt!!!!! you had better luck/circumstances. i dont have what you did#it doesnt inspire me or give me hope. it makes me feel more hopeless others can do stuff and i cant.#people were willing to help you but not me? youre not willing to now help me? what else do i do?#especially when people tell me they struggled for a few years. im glad you haven't struggled your whole life like me#and i know youre trying to be nice. but it doesnt help im sorry 😭😭😭😭😭
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ingravinoveritas · 4 months ago
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david tennant as hedwig fancast: yay or nay?
Ohh, boy. Well, when I first read this, my immediate thought was "Hell yay, but he'd have to fight Michael for it." Haha.
I love that we have this video of Michael just a few years ago talking about desperately wanting to play Hedwig, and you're asking about the possibility of David as Hedwig. It's become almost a long-running joke about how Michael and David have always been up for the same parts/thought of as being the same "type" of actor, so it seems entirely fitting that I could easily see either one of them as Hedwig...but they would give very different interpretations/versions of the character.
So I could see this being something very much like what Michael and David have talked about before, about having a "retirement plan" where they are doing a theatrical touring production of Good Omens and swapping roles every night. Maybe one of them plays Hedwig and one plays Yitzhak one night, and then swapped the next? Or within the same show, Michael/David plays Hedwig for half the show and Yitzhak for the other half? The possibilities really are quite numerous...
I did have the opportunity to see John Cameron Mitchell as Hedwig on Broadway years ago and he was absolutely transcendent in the role, to where it's almost impossible for me to picture anyone else. But in thinking of your question along with the physical demands of the role (and knowing how much David lived up to the task of playing Macbeth), I think David could definitely handle the physicality of Hedwig. I'd also love to hear him sing "Sugar Daddy" (for oh so many delicious reasons...) and I think he would kill it on "The Origin of Love." That's not even getting into how gorgeous David would look in the costumes, of course. Even the drag outfit he wore in Much Ado has some shades of Hedwig to it, in fact (mainly the denim skirt, stockings, and boots)...
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So yes, I would absolutely have to vote in the affirmative for a David Tennant fancast of Hedwig, with or without Michael Sheen. Please, universe, let's make it happen...
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crimeronan · 1 year ago
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im think sm about the hypothetical in this shitty alt timeline of belos "gifting" luz an amity grimwalker, specifically luz walking up to amity, looking haunted and done and holding a baby that looks scarily similar to amity and just asking "how are you healing up?" when amity has NOT told her abt her injury.
OH GOD.
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osaemu · 10 months ago
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nobody asked about my love life but here it is anyways
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