#idk. i mean obviously i understand it
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*sees popular tumblr user realizing they have DID and talking about how lame and bullshit community terminology sounds and how the whole community is full of dogma and mysticism* wow, did i used to sound like this? holy shit i kind of sucked! anyway bye *makes out with block button*
#idk. i mean obviously i understand it#'i'm not like those WEIRD CRINGE PEOPLE who are CRAZY! i don't even think this is a REAL DISORDER!' is like#THE symptom#but god i really don't want to be like anywhere near that kind of energy lol. still trying to excise it from my own self#i also did not like this person for other reasons but felt kind of like blocking would be pointless#(also funny to be like 'all the terminology is so gay' like i used to and then use plural. literally my most hated woo term)#(truly all internalized ableism is built kinda different)#i'll delete this later lol i dont want to be a mean meanie it's just like. hm! wow!
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The whole transandrophobia discussion thing is weird bc it feels like it's a bunch of poc and jewish trans people being like "here are my experiences of how specifically being MASCULINE had affected me, and the discrimination and violence I experienced based on that. And here is how that relates to me being a racial/ethnic minority"
And then a few loud white trans people going "ohhh you wanna be oppressed so bad you *slur*. This is why there aren't any poc in your movement it's because REAL poc understand intersectionality"
#hot take white culturally christian or athiest leftests do not properly interpret white jewish ppl#like as a poc i and other poc understand that white jewish ppl often get racial privilege#but a) not always b) they experience oppression based off of their ethnicity#idk from my perspective it seems like white goyim either see jewish ppl as 'the disgusting exotic enemy' or 'basically WASPS but they#wanna feel special'#with no nuance. no recognition#look maybe this next part is bc i didnt grow up with jewish ppl and therefore didnt know until I was 18/19 that jewish ppl can count as#white. but like. idk how to say this. i dont wanna speak over white jewish ppl. but like.#jewish ppl that have obvious jewish features (whether Ashkenazi facial features OR they dont have those but wear eg kippahs)#arent like. white. idk pls correct me if this is antisemitic or incorrect or something.#but like. light skinned =/= white obviously.#i just struggle to see how my bestfriend with her lovely dark eyes and curls and nice nose counts as 'white' when ppl call her the k slur#across the street. ykwim?#like white doesnt mean light skinned. it means 'part of the in-group of white ppl'#like my ex who is white and jewish? yeah hes white. if he didnt wear his necklace then goyim wouldnt know. you know#like obvs he still experiences ethnic oppression but he doesnt experience racial oppression#but other ppl with more prominent eg ashkenazi (im singling them out bc most jewish ppl here are ash.) like i dont GET how they have racial#privilege.
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DATV Spoilers Just in Case!) I’ve seen a head canon floating around that when solas puts a mage!Rook in the regret prison, it tranquilizes them. What do you think Viago’s reaction to this happening to a Crow!Rook would be?
i think there's a small terrible part of viago that instinctively thinks it was a bad investment/solution to send rook off with varric, since he's lost one of his best assassins. and then of course he hates that this is his first reaction because rook is more than that to him, but he's been conditioned by their lives to worry about his power and the mission first. and then i think he throws himself into trying to prove that he is a better man than that by finding a cure, without being obvious about it, even if his worry actually makes him messier and obvious. a similar outward reaction to what i've seen people headcanon about how he feels when he gets the news that rook is stuck in the fade trap in general (anger, determination, frustration, etc)
the idea of viago as a man who clings to "i rose to this rank for a reason, above the other crows. i'm a killer but with my poisons, i'm cleaner. i'm royalty. i'm better." is so beautiful to me. who he wants by his side/publically allies with is made more interesting to me for that reason. rook and teia make a very short list, so for him to lose either of them (especially to a fate worse than death. like i know there's a cure but i'm not sure if that's common knowledge and it has rammys bro) will inevitably cause a crash out the likes of which thedas may have never seen before <3
#tho also i have no fucking clue. i love viago and his high strung freakish tendencies#but a lot of this is just me thinking of viago and not necessarily this specific ask. sorry anon#there are other people on here with a better grasp on vi#and i plan to keep it this way because the moment i have to think of him as a mentor figure#it pollutes my vision board for him. LOL#i don't think i'll ever play a de riva rook because i'll ruin my own experiment#this is my control variable. it's a wildlife documentary…#just because the baby crow is about to be cannibalised doesn't mean i'm going to stop it from happening#sorry. i know i said all that and im now saying 'but idk' but its true#my understanding of viago i think is mixed at best. i have not read the comics he is in and#8 little talons is very much a high stakes scenario where he hates literally everything thats happening#so that might not be a perfect judge of character. ive never seen this guy relaxed ever#tho saying this. this is probably his default state LOL#viago de riva#txt#anonymous#answered#it just feels a bit weird for me to enjoy 'the crows are morally grey' but then be like 'not my favorite talon viago tho'#i think viago should mistreat rook. for my sake. but then i would feel weird. which is why i shouldnt speak on it#i cannot be an unbiased party LOL. like im not saying he /directly/ abused rook#because i think w his age and timelines it just wouldnt be him. but i also dont think he's fucking speaking up and going#'NO MORE CORPORAL PUNISHMENT! I'LL PROTECT YOU ROOK!'#like be serious. thats a grown man near the top of the hierarchy. just another crow so used to abuse#and double crossing and violence that he takes it as a normal and given for his life/world#which obviously. like. creates issues in his personal life. whether thats with teia or with rook. lmfao.#especially with a guy this paranoid. he just strikes me as the guy to intentionally hurt rook so others dont recognise his weakness#'they need to see me punish you so that they won't kill you' <- totally normal thought to have viago you're so normal
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It’s just…so painful to watch Armand readily submit in order to obtain the love he so desperately craves. And while it’s most assuredly a manipulative tactic, it’s still one borne out of fear and desperation. He cannot lose this person he’s come to love and so will become whatever they want, do whatever they want just so they’ll stay with him. But it won’t be enough. No matter how much he acquiesces or seeks to control (himself, others, the environment), he won’t be able to make Louis stay with him in the perfect life, perfect self he built in the hopes of finally being loved. It will all crumble with Armand left alone in the rubble of what he created, the author of his own abandonment.
#this unfortunately hits way too close to home for me#let’s not even get into Claudia’s anger at never being enough#iwtv spoilers#interview with the vampire#armand#this is just me speaking from personal experience…but there is definite manipulation at play here from Armand#and I don’t necessarily mean that pejoratively- when you’re desperate for people to like/love you you’ll become whatever they want#or whatever you think they’d want and you give it to them so they’ll want to keep you around#I’ve done it so often with the people in my life- and make no mistake it’s also a survival tactic#you give someone what they want they won’t hurt you#and when that’s how you survive for years and years it becomes the default method of interacting with others#even with normal people who genuinely mean you no harm you revert to that people pleasing mode#as a means of control both external and internal#this is what i see armand doing- his way of surviving that he’s never truly broken out of#armand ceding coven control to Louis and curating the Dubai penthouse for Louis are part of the same pattern of behavior#and even tho it’s ultimately harmful and will only end badly for armand and Louis’ relationship#idk if armand knows how to not exist that way with someone he loves/desires#all of this also ties into louis and daniel#because of course Armand will lose it over Louis finding connection and interest with someone else aside from him#someone HUMAN no less#and I can see Armand taking out his anger on Daniel as a way of expressing his own frustration at still not being enough for Louis#breaking daniel’s mind in a desperate attempt to understand why this human could reach Louis in ways he couldn’t#not saying any of this to excuse Armand and his behavior obviously (I’m very upset and worried over the trial looming on the horizon)#but I do understand this impulse and how you’ll throw ANYONE under the bus in order to preserve your place with loved ones#it’s all horrifying but unfortunately I empathize#like even if Louis is right to walk out on him when he learns/remembers the truth of what happened to Claudia#I’ll probably still find myself saddened by Armand’s fate because I’ve absolutely been there myself#it’s a tragedy of his own making- his fear and desperation birthing manipulative and controlling behaviors#that ultimately result in your own abandonment#god this fucking show
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Mmm thinking about Liesel now. She’s a very calculating character clearly and she’s the one who most blatantly suggests that El isn’t quite a person. She admits to Aadhaya that the reason she has sex with El is because El is powerful enough that she could absolutely destroy the world, probably even without meaning to, and when someone is that powerful it’s important that she has people she cares for enough that they can pull her back from the ledge. It’s this really interesting in-between of acknowledging the personhood of El, of acknowledging her as someone with feelings and desires and someone who loves and cares, and also treating her as someone who needs to be managed, which would be way more insulting if it was anyone but Liesel. I’m not sure where I’m going with this, I just can’t stop wondering at how Liesel imagines El, if it’s all a means to an end for her and El is little more than a chess piece or if there is true acknowledgement of her as a person from the person who seems to have the greatest understanding of what exactly El is
#(all this assuming that liesel is right about El being an ‘entity’. whatever that means)#the scholomance#idk i’m just having a ‘go wild about people so powerful they aren’t necessarily a people anymore’. it’s so fascinating to me#one of my favorite types of characters#i am inclined to think it’s the second btw. liesel sees el as a person she understands that her feelings are true and real and powerful. she#just also is pragmatic enough to understand that the nature of el’s power means someone needs to be there to keep her from going off the edg#and we’ll it’s liesel so obviously no one but her can be trusted to do this right. lmao
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izzy hands with misplaced resentment towards jim because of the association with losing limbs in the night out of his control
#& the whole begging them to kill him thing and having that denied feeling like its taking away his autonomy in the situation#idk its something#i just think exploring complex emotions is really interesting like. obviously jim was doing it for his own good#and its not that izzy doesn't understand that. but hes been held down in the night and had things taken from him before#and its hard not to associate that sometimes#& maybe you can't be angry at the person you really want to be angry at but you need to be angry at someone#and maybe its easier to be angry at the people trying to help you#nyxtalks#ofmd#our flag means death#ofmd s2 spoilers#izzy hands#israel hands#jim jimenez
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#mine musings#not tagging 'cause i just want to ramble (this is about lc)#do people feel like lg's character is incomplete without a backstory?#like a “past” before he met cxs#i feel like it's a nice-to-have thing (wouldn't be opposed to it) but i don't think his character requires it to be fully fleshed out yknow#his character is strongly defined by his role in the narrative because that's how stories work. but like#i do feel like we've learned a lot about him that would've stayed constant even if cxs isn't in his life though#like idk i just don't understand calling him a plot device i guess#like would he be more interesting if it was revealed he got attached to cxs so easily bc he had some kind of unhappy childhood or whatever?#i mean if it's executed well. sure?#personallyyyyyyy i think it's already compelling if he's just like. some guy#he's just some nerdy kid who made a friend and felt grief and loss for the first time and couldn't take it#like. that's compelling to me. unhappy childhood would be interesting too but like. there's nothing wrong with lg being just Some Guy™ imo😭#maybe it's bc i like the idea that lg could be anyone#and what i mean is like. that could be me. that could be you#all it takes is to find a love and friendship you're not willing to let go of. and as S1 has shown many clients have the same regrets#the only difference is that they never had the ability to change the past like lg did#like cxs said in YE1. everyone would want to have the ability to change the past. it's human nature#and i like the idea that the love and grief lg went through isn't something that's unique to him#like obviously it's unique in the sense that he makes it worse for himself with time loops#but like. the love he experienced could also happen to me. could also happen to you#same with the grief#i'm realizing as i'm rambling here that THIS is actually what i love about lg's character#now i kinda wish i didn't hide this in the tags lmao but whatever#i didn't want to invite debates over this and like if director li wants to give him a backstory that's fine#but the way lg is right now. i don't think he's “just a plot device”#and i don't think he's an incomplete character#i'll accept any backstory but god i really wish he stays being just Some Guy who loved and lost and continues to love and lose#because it's human and normal and everyone goes through it#oh no now i'm forming opinions on this asdfghjkl i just wanted to ramble. i started out being neutral over him having a backstory
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This isnt new or original at all but i gotta say some of my favorite characters are always those absolutely awful charismatic bastard villians who in fiction I enjoy but if I met in real live I would punt into the stars. Bonus points when they get their inevitable and extremely satisfying comeuppance and get their ass handed to them
#bill cipher#william afton#dr robotnik#good trio of these kinda guys#there are of course more#and this isnt like#anything new or original#as i said#but i think it should be reiterated#especially in an era when like people really struggle understanding that liking and enjoying a villain and depicting them as fun or likeable#does not in fact mean that you support anything that they are about#or that you wouldnt either punt them into oblivion or just quietly skulk away#idk its wild to me ive seen so many people getting angry about people liking bad characters#and obviously there are nuances and such but again we must recall fictional characters arent real#but yeah characters like these are like fucked up barbie dolls to me#fun to play with and pose and dress up and also somehow quite satisfying to rip their head off or watch their head get ripped off#i think the joker could also qualify but hes more dicey bc people cannot be normal about him#i think joker fanboys might be why this opposition to people enjoying villains comes from#welcome back to posts where an essay is hidden among my tags#i like the format it lets me ramble#uhh there are definitely more guys in here#the joker#and dont get me wrong i dislike certain villians too and it sometimes squicks me out to see people being so obessed with them even healthily#but like i just keep it to myself cause thats a me thing#belos definitely fits into this but only sometimes for me#sometimes i just get irritated seeing him but again#me problem therefore keep it to myself#this is so chronically online but yeah#jekyll and hyde#victor frankenstein
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this isn’t even about my evil agenda anymore I actually just need to hear your dissertation on voltron/klance x first love late spring
you do evil things to my dick and balls. i hope you know that.
first love / late spring is a very keith-core song, but i think it also applies to both keith and lance... but more specifically, FL/LS is keith pre-relationship, and then FL/LS is lance once they have already started dating.
i'm obsessed with that one interview of mitski where she explained that she wrote this song while she was experiencing her vulnerable first love... and first love is vulnerable. you simultaneously reap the rewards of being known but at the same time, you've now let someone else know you, and now you have to trust them to take care of you. and it's so vulnerable. it's more naked than being naked. and it's so difficult as well because now you're learning a brand new way you can be hurt.
so keith, pre-relationship... he's pining for lance and he is MISERABLE. he's lost control! he feels like he's being consumed by the enormity of his feelings. he's eight years old and small and never asked for this, he never wanted to know he could feel this way. he just wants lance to fucking go already. keith wants to spit vitriol and blame and shame and drive lance away so that when lance leaves him (and he will leave him, like everyone else has), then at least it will be on keith's own terms for once. and keith doesn't, he refuses, to say how he feels. he'll spitefully choke on his confession until it suffocates him. he doesn't want to know what lance might say.
but he also is afraid of lance's reaction because... if lance gives him even a sliver of ground, if there's even a promise of a chance -- keith will fold instantly. he will jump into this love headfirst. he'll do anything if it will make lance stay with him.
and then lance, mid-established relationship... things with keith are perfect, everything is going great, so why does lance feel so anxious all the time? why does he feel so scared when keith looks at him like he's his whole world? maybe the problem is lance. because what they have is real. because he's pretty sure keith is it for him. and that terrifies lance. because lance, deep down, knows he's going to screw this up. and it's not just his heart on the line; he's also going to hurt keith.
keith smiles at him and lance feels sick to his stomach. he wants to tell keith that they might be happy right now, but eventually, lance is going to ruin this. he wants to warn keith that lance is going to break his heart one day.
lance isn't always so negative about himself. during the day, it's easy to let himself be buoyed and enveloped by his feelings for keith. he loves being in love with keith. because the love is real. it's real, and it's there, and that matters. but at night, all those poisonous insecurities and anxieties rear their ugly head, and lance finds himself standing on a ledge over a drop. lance daydreams about spending the rest of his life with keith; lance has never felt so young and small.
#mintcaboodle#klance#voltron#ask#the old child/young adult metaphor is also like. so lance-core. AND THE 'I DON'T WANT TO GO HOME' LINE!!!!!!!!#im in my feels tonight i'm sorry the lance analysis is not fully cooked#also like obviously lance doesn't always feel this way. it's more pertinent closer to the beginning when he#starts to fully realize the depths of his feelings and he's freaking out because he's beginning to understand what it means to spend#the rest of your life with someone and that is a TERRIFYING thing to want and imagine when you're only 17/18#lance does get better though and his insecurities die out the longer and more stable his relationship with keith is#though sometimes those same insecurities crop up now and again#i talk a lot about pining keith and how like tumultuous his experience is. but once he starts dating lance things even out for him#whereas lance is relatively chill in his pining and then begins to flounder after they get together and after he's realized the Love word#otp: we are a good team#katiecanons#idk i guess#keith#lance
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Angus: are sure you’re alright?
Andrew, crying: yeah it’s just these onions
Angus:
Andrew:
Angus: those are potatoes.
@winterwrites23
#hetalia#sot#incorrect quotes#outlander au#sot incorrect quotes#AUGH I LOVE ANDREW YOU DONT UNDERSTAND#also andrew is derived from the Greek name andreas which means ‘strong’ or ‘manly’#the surname findlay is obviously Scottish and I found some sources saying it’s derived from the Gaelic fionnlagh#which is often anglicized into ‘fair hero’ :)#I think findlay is such a neat name. it just sounds so flexible idk#Angus is of Celtic origins#and it comes from óengus or aengus who is the Celtic god of love#I assume he also has the surname findlay#considering he’s Andrew’s father’s brother??#im picking up crumbs and turning it into a family tree#I swear it’s there somewhere I’m not making shit up
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always wild to get the most horrifically transphobic comments from someone then check their profile to see they have “she/they” in their bio.
#and it’s so weird bc they always come from this odd place of being defensive of womanhood#like in a very te/rfy way#like ‘well you’re a MAN now so you couldn’t POSSIBLY understand what us FEMMES go through’#like bestie that was literally me a year ago#i fully do understand#it feels very ‘silence gender traitor’#and like#idk how to say this in a less abrasive way#but changing your pronouns or being nonbinary doesn’t mean you can’t be transphobic#bc in the past few weeks i’ve experienced a WEIRD amount of transphobia from non transitioning nonbinary people#who just REFUSE to get that our experiences are different#or who look down on me for making the ‘wrong’ choice in my transition#and like obviously not all nonbinary ppl are like this#but a lot of non transitioning ppl who were afab tend to be vulnerable to falling for te/rf rhetoric#just by virtue of their life experiences and which communities they often start out in#and like this is obviously part of a larger conversation abt ra/df/rn rhetoric in queer spaces#but it’s just one of those things i wish i could talk abt without ppl immediately jumping to conclusions abt my views
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Different forms of the same sentiment: How can we love each other if we are not equal in our eyes?
#utsukushii kare#utsukushii kare eternal#Utsukushii kare 2#my beautiful man#my beautiful man 2#mr. heart#japanese bl#korean bl#when I saw this scene today my first thought was ‘oh shit kiyoi gave him the mr. heart treatment’#so obviously I had to make this#And since idk how to make gifs y’all get this homebrew shit#hira x kiyoi#riku hagiwara#yagi yusei#you tell him kiyoi!!!#also specifically kiyoi saying ‘don’t call my man a pebble’#!!!!!!#Hira not understanding that Hira and kiyoi being together means they should do things together and not just for each other#and Hira not understanding that him insulting himself is insulting the person kiyoi loves#BONK go to self worth jail
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"all of us are like shinji ikari, people hate him because theyre reminded of themselves" speak for yourself 😭 personally i do not see myself in a 14 year old boy who sees girls his age as stand-ins for unmet social, emotional, and sexual needs, and who willingly commits physical and sexual violence against them as a punishment for feeling personally slighted by them, but you do you i guess??
#shinjis story/character arc is one of the most blatant cautionary tales in media and people are still like#''well yes he sexually assaulted asuka but she was mean to him and he wasnt always like this and hes just a neurodivergent little boy!''#''shinji went through so much...'' so did asuka but she didnt go jack off in front of a comatose shinji or attempt to strangle him to death#or attempt to kiss him while he was asleep or ogle his body alongside her friends etc etc etc#at some point youve got to realize that while he was definitely abused and neglected he knows this behavior is wrong and does it anyway#he rejects misatos (creepy) advances because he understands what consent (& lack of it) is. but all of that is out the window w asuka#so no. i dont sympathize with him. anyone who was ever bullied or harassed in school should know that ''theyre just a kid''#is always one of the most annoying dismissals of obviously dangerous behavior that exists in the world.#idk its just concerning to me that people claim that everyone is a bit like shinji as a dismissal of the hurtful things he did#and that it says a lot more about you than it does about me#evie.txt ♡
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And the kiss! (in addition to this)
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I'm not tagging this because the tags are just me rambling about my thoughts on what a says here. I guess it could be t/w/c critical? But barely I think lol.
#i was gonna put it on the same post as the other#but it didn't fit#and i'm going to ramble a bit in these tags#i still don't know how i feel about this scene#the kiss itself? love it#i don't think a is above sharing a ~moment~#but the “i cannot allow you to fall in love with me” is...huh?#why would you say that? what kind of sense does that make?💀#the thing that solidified my confusion at having a say that was the scene with the detective's bff - specifically if it's n#a will tell n this:#“but love…it is a weakness in my armour. i cannot allow that. if someone were to find that weakness and exploit it...”#“you know I have experienced that once already.”#and THAT makes sense#a's desire to be a knight is what shifted their duties to their sister#and a's love for her - for their family - is what feuled them into challenging the lord who then kills them all#so a repressing their emotions and being almost fearful of their love for the detective and their desire to be with them#makes sense as the reason why a pushes the detective away#so wouldn't saying “i cannot allow myself to fall in love with you” align with that more?#during my first read of b3 i thought it was a typo lol#but then i saw that there's an option where the detective can say “this is just flirting and what comes next would just be a kiss”#thats paraphrasing of course#but yeah the detective can basically go “its not that deep”💀#so a saying that was on purpose and i don't really understand why#i mean obviously they think they aren't worthy of the detective's love#but idk man it just feels weird to me😭#i'm adjusting it in my mind ngl otherwise zuri would back way off#because she isn't quite there yet lmao she knows she has feelings but she isn't calling it love rn#her response would just be her on the defense and deflecting and downplaying#which sucks because she's completely down for a moment at that point#it hurts more than she expects but she's down because she also thinks he shouldn't fall in love with her
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#killer bee sweepppp sndnsj#anyways killer bee bc hes so fuckin irritating i dont even want his tailed beast i would just kill him#jiraiya bc he mughtve once been funny but in his old age he let himself go. just an old creep now pip pip#kushina bc her rage and resentment over failed dreams is understandable but her abusiveness is not#fugaku bc those two lines under his mouth piss me tf off and hes the reason itachi had to do that. also he was mean to bb saske insta-die#those two elders are fuckinng everyone else over to satiate their need to conquer their own trauma. like is it enough. could it ever be#danzo idk his pissy litle voice and the fact that he tries so hard to be cool but hes just not. obviously hes living thru his little boytoy#hiruzen he just pisses me off. like in general. like ur not the hero and u had ur son murdered bc ur obsessed with a little boy. so#sakura dont get me wrong shes the epitamy of complicated mostly shes just annoying bc she wants to be different but then it doesnt happen#gai i like gai dont get me wrong but he does get annoying sometimes and i have issues with him and tenten idk#obito is literly incel annoying like he used rin as his sunshine power a complete lack of self awareness and hes that type that like uses#girls as like little cheerleaders like theyre just supporting characters for His Life and not actusl people#rin is so annoying too tho like damn girl i Understand the torment of having to hype up a mid guy that cheesed on you. like that was legit#probly harder for u than the exams but shes annoying bc she then used that role and idk something grody about her manipulating them but ma#naruto
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I was just thinking how funny it is that I loved pretty much all the english pokemon songs up until xy. And then literally every japanese song for xy was actually so much better than any of the english ones lol
#like idk what happened there#but the english xy songs sucked so bad#i mean i obviously don’t understand a word of japanese#but they're still miles better#i mean they did re-use the original pokemon theme for the first series of xy which was nice#but just showed how shit the songs were gonna be from that point lol#pokemon#pokemon xy
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