#i like the format it lets me ramble
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This isnt new or original at all but i gotta say some of my favorite characters are always those absolutely awful charismatic bastard villians who in fiction I enjoy but if I met in real live I would punt into the stars. Bonus points when they get their inevitable and extremely satisfying comeuppance and get their ass handed to them
#bill cipher#william afton#dr robotnik#good trio of these kinda guys#there are of course more#and this isnt like#anything new or original#as i said#but i think it should be reiterated#especially in an era when like people really struggle understanding that liking and enjoying a villain and depicting them as fun or likeable#does not in fact mean that you support anything that they are about#or that you wouldnt either punt them into oblivion or just quietly skulk away#idk its wild to me ive seen so many people getting angry about people liking bad characters#and obviously there are nuances and such but again we must recall fictional characters arent real#but yeah characters like these are like fucked up barbie dolls to me#fun to play with and pose and dress up and also somehow quite satisfying to rip their head off or watch their head get ripped off#i think the joker could also qualify but hes more dicey bc people cannot be normal about him#i think joker fanboys might be why this opposition to people enjoying villains comes from#welcome back to posts where an essay is hidden among my tags#i like the format it lets me ramble#uhh there are definitely more guys in here#the joker#and dont get me wrong i dislike certain villians too and it sometimes squicks me out to see people being so obessed with them even healthily#but like i just keep it to myself cause thats a me thing#belos definitely fits into this but only sometimes for me#sometimes i just get irritated seeing him but again#me problem therefore keep it to myself#this is so chronically online but yeah#jekyll and hyde#victor frankenstein
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so has anyone figured out WHY there is the Need To Share our Artworks™ or is it just the vibes and our Soul apparently
#ive been running on “two cakes. u aren't BOTHERING people by putting art on their feed they can scroll past it/if they dont they get ”cake“”#and we love “cake”#“cake” is picture on the internet in this case#like okay the contracts and transaction format is a me problem!! i need to get rid of the “utilitarian brain worms” bc they're boring#this is supposed to be a hobby and the “get a good grade in hobby” wolf in the brain is just crying bc that's how they understand the world#the “get a good grade in x” wolf has valid pain but needs to stop controlling my life because they don't need to earn “enough value to live”#ect ect ect#and the life of minmaxxed utility is a life of trying to appeal to a “correct” that doesn't exist yaddi yadda = boring#i love you wolf. also shut up. affectionate. concerned. you get it#ok so we remove tangible purpose from act of experience art because THAT'S not “the point”#because “the point” is the joy killer eccetera ecc#but then what? “here check out this labor of love. i drew this fucker 15 times. no there's no story* there it's just a guy”#*story in this case being an emotional engagement/a situation/a context in which to ponder/other#so it's just a Draw. no further analysis. what do others Get from that?#i know i deeply enjoy art because im a fan of the process of People Making Stuff. i love when there was nothing but now there's something!!!#THAT'S what's it all about!!!!!!!!!!!!!! to me!!!! right now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#so it stands to reason that creation is purpose enough?? to be experienced???? to be known????????#idk!!#this is a nothing burger of a thought people have always liked picture on the internet stfu maiora there doesn't need to be a reason#this is just the brainworms talking!!! because god forbid “something not have a purpose”??? blegh!!!!!!!!#sounds like unhealthy rationalizing instead of letting things be out of The Fear™!!sounds like depraving urself from joy bc of BRAINWORMS!!!#so like!!!!! picture on the internet doesn't NEED inherent value. creation is enough!! (plus there's the Attachment to Character. also.)#but then why are YOU *points at you* here? gen q!!#i made an image you like and now you are reading my word babble in some tags!!! what's THAT all about???????????#it's INTERESTING!! do you see what im trying to get at??#is it empathy??? person made something other saw something other made- other2other connection???? intrigue????????#.......all this is probably explained in some book or yt essay somewhere. oh well.#in the meantime thank you for your time! we can pretend we were stuck in an elevator together and then i started rambling#i hope you have a great rest of your day thanks for stopping by!! <3#maiora garrulates
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12 Leo: Donnie? Why are you making pudding at four in the morning???
12 Donnie: Because I've lost all control of my life.
#oli talks#ooc#muns ramblings#mindless ramblings of a madman#shitpost#teenage mutant ninja turtles#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rise of the tmnt#tmnt#rottmnt#tmnt 2012#tmnt 2k12#teenage mutant ninja turtles 2012#tmnt leo#tmnt donnie#Leonardo Hamato#Donatello Hamato#12 Mom Leo#aka yes i know I did this meme format with Goemon and Jigen but like it fits so well with so many different people sgsgsgsgsgdg#I love this meme and it's nearly 11:30pm here let me live
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anyone else feeling the burning desire to crawl out of their own skin today ?
#ramblings#formatted in a jokey way but i am feeling A Way rn. not great but ill survive#think my brain is in conflict over wanting to catch up on art or just do fuckall today. >_<#so it comes out as. i am Feeling and i need to burst open to let it out Hi people who havent heard me talk like this b4 im normal i swear#DONT WORRY ABOUT ME !!!!!!! once i can redirect myself into art ill be fine im juust struggling to start rn
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not-yet-dead-person
silly comic of a conversation in-game i thought was too funny not to make something proper for instead of a doodle ww
(timelapse + wip images (thus silly process commentary in read more if you like artist commentary :3)
i think the sketch looks silly and goofy and funny so i find it important to share with you the mere presence of the faces i drew on it. i drew it on top of the boxes without staying inside its borders because i find my proportions can get wonky if i draw them cropped in a restricted space. and I feel trapped otherwise and i will draw BAD!!! give me spaceeeee to go wild!!!!
the head circles are there for emotional support
very low res speedpaint because truth is the canvas was much bigger than the space where my comic was placed. i didnt account when exporting my timelapse in 720px that that tiny space would look so pixelated ... but it's able to be percieved, so its okay.
(i will now comment on my process and it is not brief sorry)
usually i would try to clean up my sketches and figure out what goes on top before jumping into linework, but since there are multiple panels and drawings i chose to jump into inking right away for the sake of brevity. i just went in with a brush that uses pen pressure and drew what was needed. i added extra line thickness and contrast in areas around the face because it helps direct your eyes there more easily that way.
according to her equipment rei has a chain belt but i only remembered it existed once I was going to color, and i did not like that discovery... I chose to ignore it to maintain my peace. i already have the color palettes for these characters figured out, and i didnt really want to think about a new element at the moment www I tend to overthink those things a lot so i skipped it
the rest is rather straightforward! not that anything else wasn't, but in here i could turn my brain off and sing. linework and sketching require mumbling so i cannot turn my brain off. just block in the characters with a solid color so i can have a mask (something along those lines,) where the color can stay inside. then just color in !!!
Base colors just had slight cell shading on the skin, and for the hair i airbrush a bit of the skincolor in low opacity near the forehead... I'm not sure what it means, but i can look at the faces easier with it somehow. i like the gentle subtlety it adds even if you cant really tell. it makes things look nice.
background was just me blocking in the color of the wall and floor, shade the wall a bit, then slap a noise and free use wood texture on top. work smarter not harder ! yet it took a bit to make it look stylistically fitting with the characters, and even now i think bottom middle panel looks odd. whatever!!!
for the middle panel i thought itd be funny if the background was a solid silly and colorful one to contrast the next panel's sketchy black one. a contrast to how the word widow is seen. on that note my handwritting is not pointy. i gaslighted my hand into thinking that it was indeed pointy in that moment so i could write "not-yet dead person" in letters that didn't seem cute. my hand did not fall for it but it complied anyway
that's basically it! I'm not sure what else i could say that doesn't feel barebones because it really is that straightforward. if you're curious I used clip studio paint for this. only special brush used was for linework (a brush named Lemon Brush), the rest used were just the default. my computer gets the least credit. it was trying to convince me a 20mb file was going to nuke it all the time and hardly let me save multiple times so i do not appreciate it
#re:kinder#fanart#sayaka re:kinder#rei re:kinder#OH I ALREADY RAMBLED IN MY POST WHATEVER SHOULD I TALK ABOUT NOW IN MY TAGS UEEEEEEE😭😭😭#oh yeah do you want to know a fun fact about this drawing#i started it yesterday. i wasnt meant to I DID NOT HAVE PERMISSION...FROM MYSELF... i was meant to be on break#i self imposed a one week break from doing any rekinder related project after the transcript to avoid accidental burn out#NOT THAT I GOT TIRED OF IT AFTER THAT TRANSCRIPT NOT AT ALL#but jumping straight into more hours of creativr work after over 30 hours of it is asking for disaster. it is asking for burn out#yesterday was the last day . 12 hours were left but i was going to die if i didnt draw anything it would have been OVER#(aka my period started recently so i got very gloomy and depressed so i needed to run to my favorite stress relief...drawing rekinder☺️)#(on that note seriously what the fuck please explain the evolutionary advantage to getting horribly depressed every month)#(like hello?!?! rant real quick— i get enough flashbacks everyday i DONT need them to last longer and have me more msierable ?!?!?)#(periods are so dangerous to my mental health for no reason can i get a restriction order on them or some shit what the fuck)#(anyway thats enough of that break of character DONEEEE :3333)#SO YEAH I DIDNT EVEN LAST 7 WHOLE DAYS i even played a new game in between those 6 days youd think itd het my mind of rekinder. WRONNNNGGG#not even another devastating rpg horror gamr could divert my attention for long i hsd to draw rekinder😊#using the newfound power of mt transcript i was decided on drawing rei because i dont draw her enough for how high she is on my fvaorites#i was initially doodling random lines but then i stumbled upon this interactkon and it doesnt really fit into my usual expression sheets#so i thought hey lets do it asife#i thumbnailrd it and from there i was like hey lets do it in comic format isntead of separated messy doodles in tint canvas#and the rest is hisotry .... aka i spent the last two days doing this instead of doing MY HOMEWORK!!!!!#on my defense when i wasnt drawing i was horribly depressed i had no other choice#(seriously fuck off periods WHAT what do you mean i need to be distracted 24/7 to not be struck by crippling meltdowns LEAVE ME ALONE?!?!?)#(they should be banned we as a society should find like a . cure to them it dont do me good to have a whole week where i cant function)#these tags have been more of a weird rant im sorry IVE BEEN FEELING PEEEVEDDD LATELY SO YOU GET. STRANGE DROTTER LORE ????
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hii so. i’ve bitten the bullet and made a bluesky account and a cohost just to have just in case. i don’t plan on doing really anything much on them until tumblr fully implodes (if it does) so they’re very much empty but theyre There
#armageddon rambles woah#mostly i am so so worried about losing contact with friends on here wailing#holding out my hand to you lets escape this hellfire together /silly/silly#so far bluesky seems okay but god it’s new and i am afraid WEEPING#but fuck it we ball#cohost seems more appealing format wise but i dunno#important#not sure which one i’ll end up using most but so far i assume cohost cause it’s tumblr adjacent and has an ask function#i follow like one singular person on each of them LMAO#dw though i’m staying on tumblr until im forced out for one reason or another this is just so people can find me again
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florian's such a nice kid who has such a kind heart and tries his best to not hurt ppl he cares about— *shoves what happened between him and ortega behind my back* ignore that.
#explainer : in mjverse florian and ortega dated briefly during the year between teal mask and indigo disk#but ortega broke up with him because he was still very hung up on kieran#to be kinda fair to florian he genuinely liked ortega and was a kind boyfriend to fae#but him agreeing to date ortega when he still had unresolved feelings for kieran wasn't the smartest thing to do#and yeah he's a kid and this was his first relationship so he'd probably mess some things up due to lack of experience#but that doesn't change the fact that he still hurt ortega with his actions ya know?#ortega definitely chewed florian out when they broke up tho like fae let him know exactly how he hurt faer#he'd be genuinely apologetic and really regret how he hurt ortega so they eventually reconcile and become friends again#i should've just put all these tags into the post's text itself but w/e it's easier for me to ramble in tags#i have to worry about formatting less#the only problem is that reordering tags on mobile is still dogshit all it does is fuck things up#hc : (pkmn) mjverse#chara : florian russel cavallari#chara : ortega regino#mj.txt
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Me: I'm ok.
Also me:
#Me: Ok ok you got me. There is something up. I'm gonna format this rant and not just go off the walls ramble like I usually do. :'D#me: what was that it? why are you giving me that look then? ;w;#everyone who has been here for my P5 rants: huh.....took her a few months but she finally snapped....lasted longer than I thought#everyone on here who knows I'll be bitching about this in another decade: it's fine just let her get it out of her system#silly talks#no i really am going to format the rant like this jfklsajfdkajf#i'm probs gonna change the titles I just needed to vent a bit#'silly we get you like rangi but you can't make everything about rangi' they brought her into this first not me! TT0TT#in this dissertation I'm aiming to eviscerate the author or whoever made these choices off the face of the fucking earth
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***
#The new anime official art RULES#(I mean‚ how could it not. Atsushi with hoodie AND kimono AND converse? Braid Sigma? Fingers heart Dazai???? )#But I'm so saddened by the fact they now seem to be going for the Meursault girlies for official merch-#and Akutagawa is already left out of promo art again 😭😭#Not only I've always been let down by the lack of Kyouka (which. I mean. Is no less understable but at least it's grown predictable.)#But now Akutagawa joins the bunch of left behinds 😭😭#I can't believe I'm saying this (I've cursed bsd's male-exclusive merch like. every day of my life)#but I miss the skk/sskk merch art format. At least that always gave me ss/kk to rejoice for ಥ_ಥ#I had to bear a whole season of no Akutagawa merch and I was like it's okay... There'll be plenty with season 5.........#And now they've forgotten about him already 😭😭😭#At this point Atsushi is going to be next for how much they seem to care about their protagonist ಥ_ಥ#Okay I'm done complaining I'm not actually mad ahah. The new designs truly are so pretty!!! Sigma with heels (??) at last... ?#random rambles
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They should give me a pass on having to write essays because I'm so good at posting they should go Wow well you've made some very compelling arguments about boobs soft so now you don't have to turn in that essay on dracula
#alternatively kind of not a joke: let me ramble at my lecturers abt the material#like seeeeee i have so many ideasssss No dont make me format them and read secondary sources aha#hate secondary sources. im an english majorrrrr i came here to pontificate
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i've been writing a fic since last year (it's not long, i'm just a procastinator) but i stopped just before finishing it. suddenly everything about it seemed wrong and out of character, so much that i started questioning the nature of characters themselves. did i write them right? do i even know enough to have the right to write about them?
i still have no idea and i am stuck on this one moment in the narrative, as if writing the ending would seal its fate. but i will try to finish it - if not for the story's sake, then for my own.
#hey guys if you see this. if anyone would like to beta read for me please let me know#the fic im writing is for spg but even of you don't know anything about it it would be nice to have someone read over the stuff#english is not my first language so i am afraid of using phrases/words in wrong context or writing something in wrong format you know#if you are willing to help hit me up in askbox messages or comments here and we'll try to figure it out#sorry guys i don't know how to do it differently. how do people get someone to beta read for them fr 😭#writing#writing fanfic#ramblings
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Song of the Day: December 5
"Funeral Bell" by Phildel
#song of the day#not gonna lie there's a good chance this song popped in my head earlier just because of the line 'oh brother I long for sleep'#anyway I made a curry today that was so fucking good. it was so good.#I spent a good chunk of the day in the kitchen with my work laptop open (gonna get access to a frankly alarming amount of third-party data!#is it terrifying every time I catch a broadened glimpse of the reality of our surveillance state? oh yeah. ohhhh yeah. big time.#but am I going to let the pervasive anxiety keep me from accessing the data needed to provide context for my 5yr projections?#not a chance! if anybody's gonna benefit from our nation's hideous blatant data-grubbing it'll be me#and every coworker downstream who benefits from my automations)#and our whole house smelled like coconut and ginger and peppers all day it was /lovely/#anyway I can't do justice to Phildel's incredible crystalline voice on my best day but I like to croon along a million octaves below#and it is a gorgeous song#uhhh I didn't sleep at all! possibly recognizable in the hopskip multiple-'anyway's formatting of this tag ramble. I am Sleepless#but I have curry and also the personal info of over eighty thousand students at universities across the US and isn't that what's important#edit! hahahahahaha everybody laugh at me laugh at my foolishness. it's eight hundred thousand students. I've got the shakes.
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For the edgy oc ask meme..... 9 !
oouuughh this activates the neurons VERY HARD this will Not be a simple answer fkgfgkjh MORE UNDER CUT-
this was also probably gonna be longer but i only now just got my computer set up im so sleepyyy
THIS GONNA BE FOR VEL'RYN my stinky critter, im writin little things for some of em, some are like... if i wasss maybe to do a little comic thingy or story maybe i would give context to that more? idk i dont wanna write too much ahha but also a lot of these have association HEAVILY due to head amvs and INTENSE vibes??
Sleep Token - Alkaline 'Not acid nor alkaline Caught between black and white Not quite either day or night She's perfectly misaligned' The whole song is VERY vel'ryn, esp fray'ryn ship considering the whole esteem thing (which in my lore is more separated and has a little bit of a difference just a bit? i think its a common difference tho),
but on the face value of the song it really captures them really close lol- their visuals, their changes over the course of their story, how it effects everyone else the more dynamisticly radiated they are, let alone the MENTAL.
the Buttress- brutus 'Something wicked this way comes And as I set to face it, I'm unsure should I embrace it, should I run? What motivates me? Hatred? Is it love? What's more wrong, that I too wish to be great Or my mother wished she'd had a son? And even if I can't be the one Maybe I could at least help make way for him Until the day that he comes Maybe my name could also be known That I helped return good to the people And restored greatness to Rome' -and also- 'My name is Brutus and my name means heavy So with a heavy heart I'll guide this dagger into the heart of my enemy'
another one where the whole song is kind of an outline for vel!!! this one leaning into both verses vel is in differently; ffxiv being a literal sibling-type beat, and seele-verse being more of a paranoid thought system that were basically hereditary.
spirit box - hysteria 'What I've created as violent delights in my head Will have a violent end A broken violent end
And I feel fear disintegrate Axis annihilate In crystal clarity Tension pulling me in the shadows'
Shiro Sagisu - Keep your head above the mayhem 'Showing flashes of bravado In a torrent of destruction Keep your head above the mayhem Clarity will be your weapon As the blinded falter and die'
Brand of Sacrifice - Animal 'Don't let go of what's left of your humanity Blood must flow I will not allow myself to be an animal All I know is I must subdue the beast Hatred grows and so does the temptation to release'
very 'in battle' moment, because vel is SOOO dynamis heavy. they can absorb aether a little more than normal sure but dynamis is strooong and they can use it like aether (mostly against their will and only in battle or in complete mania, which can happen anyyytime with usss) and it acts sort of like spiritual pressure (like bleach!), so the more its used the more their brain fries the more they spiral... its a cycle thats VERY slippery-
theres a lot more, ill link the playlist i have for vel! always updating it tbh, but when i make playlists i take every part of a song literally and its gotta fit a vibe somehow yknow?? the rhythms, the riffs, the sounds and vocals- !!!
however, other songs that have relating lyrics include; Frozen- celldweller (social kid remix) Magdalena- a perfect circle Love me- counter parts Грустная Сука- ic3peak Granite- Sleep token (as well as Atlantic) which is REAAALLY heavily paired with @rohandydandy 's wol rohir kjbfkjh (atlantic is also a frayryn song, but its really well paired either way!!)
Songs without lyrics are also important!! i think riffs say what words cant! Meshuggah- They move below (beginning looped)
Jason richardson(luke holland)- Sparrow
Aequilibrium- Andrey Vinogradov
Augury - richaadeb
and so on ::} Full character playlist
#i didnt want to answer this on mobile forgive me#asked#;void breaker#;void speak#;tunes#i hope this formats okay its a lot of text kdjgfh#autism activate hi i love love love music and playlists <::)#rly my oc is made up of a lot of songs and the songs vibes- and a lot of the higher energy#tends to be like... momentary values and beliefs that come out in those moments- whereas otherwise theyre buried?#idk!!!! ::> thank you for the ask! thanks for letting me ramble ehe
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oh ao3 really does not like me today huh
#i posted my secret santa fic and it just. solidly disappeared for a whole two minutes#like it didn't exist anywhere. not in the tags not in my drafts not in my account...nowhere#and the formatting for the posting page was being super weird and wouldn't let me edit the notes... strange#august rambles#i mean the fic is back now so. phew
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you ever try to write something 100% completely for yourself and no one else and then get SO scared and embarrassed as soon as you actually get down to writing it? even though you're literally writing it for your own eyes only??
#I WANNA WRITE A FIC-FORMAT ANALYSIS COME ON#MY DUMB BRAIN WON'T LET ME PUT IT DOWN. AAAAUUGGHHH#Lu rambles#gripin hours#it feels like I'm somehow disrespecting the characters and story I'm trying to write??? idk man my brain is being weiiird
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Lesson learned — don’t get an apartment that says no pets and expect your landlord to be reasonable when she allows an ESA as an exception.
#cw vent#darkacey rambles#my landlord is the biggest fucking bitch about my 8lbs dog#literally she’s trying to make me sign an addendum to our lease so she can force me to not let my dog play fucking fetch inside#bc she dosn’t like the sound of Maisy’s happy little paws going across the floor#and she acts like Maisy barks 24/7#but Maisy rarely barks and even when she does it’s not for more than 15-20 minutes#also she has no fucking idea how to format legally binding paperwork#the addendum is a free template for PETS not ESAs#and the lease itself was also a free template#I’m suing this bitch for harrassment#and I’m going to break my lease early bc this is such bullshit#i just want to own my own house but everything is too expensive#moving is going to suck#but hopefully I can get some money from her for it#if not then at least I have some savings#and thank god my friends are supportive in all of this#offering to help pack and load a truck and find me lawyers#this pretty much solidifies that even though I don’t like the town I’m currently living in#i never want to give up the friends I’ve made here#y’all follow me and know this so thank you#everybody else thanks for listening to this vent
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