#idk what do I even tag this as like nobody but one knows what this is
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god i finally watched new episodes my honest reaction is jgiwoaoKzmxmkwkakkak
#it kinda doesnt feel real for me idk why#like i do not actually process all of it??#tho I DO have ideas and thinking i did pay attention#maybe i've just had a wild day i guess#but also oh god vex'ahlia broke my heart#twice#first time were when scanlan was talking how he couldn't be at two places at the same time to help 'em and she said nobody gives a fuck#i feel so bad for scanlan rn i love him#haven't watched campaing to the bard's lament yet but oh fuck im too spoiled i do know what happens where (a little bit)#the second time was when she said she really cares for percy i started crying at that moment#also im a lil bit disappointed cuz i thought we would get percys death and vex's spech but we got âi open the door completly nakedâ scene ->#and im very happy we got it like oh wow i didn't expect that#but idk im just a girl and i love percahlia's slowburn#since i watched 64 eps of actual campaign it become hard for me to not compare campaign and tlovm cuz obviosly its very different#but with percahlia in tlovm we don't have hours and hours of campaign context#(we don't have percy making her arrows)#and i understand why cuz 100+ streams 3+ hours each is one thing and animated series with 12 eps of 25 minutes is another#but as i said previosly it is very hard for me to not compare it#by the way i do think changes in tlovm make sense#cuz like?? i think vex is more sharpy in tlovm than in campaign?? like#like she punced scanlan in first season and in campaign they are kinda good friends and i really love them??#*punched#and i think she's more ?? bossy i guess?? idk how to put it into words but in my head it makes sense âi open the door completly nakedâ ->#goes earlier than âi shouldve told you its yoursâ cuz shes playing pretend even more than in campaign???#acts like its casual when its actually isnt AT ALL#and im glad percy said âwhat is it i wantâ to vex cuz its kinda like that scene in campaign when percy talked to vax#when he called them all family for the first time and said he's trying to find what he wants in life#i love percy and vax dynamic btw#i wanted to write even more here but apparently i can do only 30 tags wtf#they want me to actually write posts oh no. hate to put it all in tags but im too nervous abt posting on the internet
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Great googley moogley itâs all going to shit! Every day becomes exponentially more terrifying!
And all perfectly timed to just right at the start of whatâs supposed to be my adult life where I get my shit together and be useful and productive!
#weâre cooked#weâre doomed#idk the end is nigh or whatever god damn#I just wanna be able to live in my own house and draw a guy sometimes without the ever present threat of the horrors is that too much#apparently yeah cause houses arenât achievable anymore but man#m a n#especially if you didnât/couldnât go to college and arenât capable of working most jobs#doesnât help thereâs the chance some part of my existence might be suddenly illegal or extremely dangerous yippie!#the options are literally 1. people die 2. people die what the hell do you even do man#how the fuck is this the election Iâm gonna get forced to be a part of weâre living in hell#and nobody around me believes itâll get bad yay great oh so wonderful#I canât wait to lose rights and cause millions of deaths regardless of who gets chosen#I think one of these days Iâm literally just gonna die of stress#itâll either be a stroke or a heart attack or cancer or uh well ya know#weâre fucked#weâre screwed#I wanna have some kind of an actually visible break down but ive suppressed everything so much that I donât outwardly emote much anymore :)#and the constantly dissociating thing too I guess#if you ever think âoh yeah I can just think of guy in a situation thatâs so coolâ donât itâs a trapâ#although tbh this would be significantly worse without it so uh law of equivalent exchange I guess#fuck fuck fuck anyway#not putting this in the main tags#definitely deleting this later#if anyone in my house got any hints that I may or may not have different opinions than them well uh Iâm financially dependent on them so um#literally wouldnât have anywhere to go if anything happened#oh weâre really in it now Simon#hell world#thereâs like what 7 genocides going on too I hate everything I hate everything I hate everything#I canât do anything to help anyone either cause I donât have a job and I could get kicked out or treated badly at home for it#not that anyone thinks very highly of me at home anyway I am kinda family disappointment number 2 I pretty sure
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making a sorta wip/unfinished compilation video thing for all the vsynth projects ive sorta lost interest in/abandoned sounds like it'd be fun to do and help me clear up some space on this got damn computer but im always like uouguhhh but what if it fucking sucks :( when it comes to like actual cover stuff đâď¸ like mannn
#delete later#uhghhhh the urge to post wips and show im not dead vs desire to remain mysterious and post whenever tf w/ no warning#the worst part is like a majority of these r also not even past the idea stage đ#i just have so many vsqxs and vprs and usts downloaded :')) bc i just like hearing these lil fuckheads sing songs i like#but i dont like just plug n play covers. so i try to do some extra work but it usually isnt that great cause duh im not great at this shit#and ive lost interest in some of these and dont rly feel like yknow. forcing myself to work on them more if im not gonna do more w em#tho it also kinda feels sad to like delete them in having not done anything w them... so that's why i like never share wips đ#cause in the case its something i never finish (spoiler: most things đ) i dont wanna disappoint#people who were genuinely looking forward to it. IF that even is anyone bruh bc thats the other thing#i feel awkward abt it bc i also feel nobody rly cares abt wips theyd rather just wait and see a final version. so ee#which is like totally understandable tbh but idk đ its hard to keep going when motivation is low yknow so id like to share wips#in the event anyone is interested and wants me to continue. but also i like being mysterious abt what i post and nobody knowing my next mov#ughhhhh. bangs my head against the wall. get me outta here. trapped in my brain with my own ideas fucking sucksssss sometimes#i have the power to make polls i COULD make more but. idk i feel like itd get old quick. kicks rocks.#OH and one last thing it'd reveal my shit ass music taste đđđđ hhhhhhhhfhfjfjnf#ignore me man im just being overdramatic. can anyone hear me. aughhghgh#also i GOTTA get a good tag for the technical vsynth shit for organization#or so people can block if they dont give a fuck. but i need to think of a funny one grrr
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Effect layer practice except i love it sm..
#FUCKING. dies forever weverhghing explodes my telekinesis throws everything across the room#th. I need to draw more au now. now.#sona#detective au#idk what do I even tag this as like nobody but one knows what this is#I just need to archive it#oughhh -1hp -1hp
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being kin is like everything is wrong forever and ever and you can never tell anyone about it because they either wont understand or believe you or wont know what youre talking about and you can never go back !!!!! and you have to watch everyone else finding people they knew and itll never happen to you !!! and it feels Cringe and Bad that this is what dictates your entire mental state so you can never have a useful conversation about mental health with anyone because they arent talking to all of you they only want to know about things that happened /here/ and maybe it would be better if i didnt know that i was actually supposed to be someone else !!!and it seems to get me so much worse because im ********** about it so even compared to other kin it feels like im just being a dramatic bitch
#im so normal everyone actually this isnt making me feel like im literally hollow haha#not even allowed to call this one a [word] because ''those arent real!'' ok but im ********** about it what else do u want me to call it#idfc how much my timeline sucked actually if [redacted] wants to put me in a tube again it cant be worse than being stuck here !#is it some kind of sick fucking multiverse joke to not have the ************ wear off Ever even if you die like#WHY AM I //STILL// LIKE THIS . HELLO#that shit made me weird in a vevry specific way and im really not supposed to be just Out Here . What#wow this is just like the tl where i got dragged outside against my will but this time i have to be tr/ans as well and i cant go back ever#and nobody knows !!!!!!!#ok most of this post was about tr/on but also honourable mention to k/h for making me cry until i threw up the other day#and also having nothing in the kin tags and making me unreasonably upset considering i dont feel like i can say i k/in from it yet since-#-idk shit about any of it really . not that anyone does tbh but still . shift that makes you so sad you throw up and convince yourself-#-youre missing an actual organ ! im so normal#delete later#primary source torment nexus tag#k/h tag
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the difficulty of trying 2 explain to ppl that im Not being self deprecating or belittling my mental illnesses when i say something that could be perceived as overly critical towards myself but that thise things actually r true abt me. ppl did die.
#i wrote a whole post trying to explain and then i realized it judt wasnt particularly worth it so i out it in the drafts. so i wrote for#like 20 minutes and all i got is soooo insanely dissociated . can we kill connor im sick of this fucking guy#idk. i wish often incould just project my brain on a wall or sometjing abd ppl would get it and i wouldnt have to explain it#bc everytjing i say even when it sounds crazy or it sounds oike im habing a breakdown its like. its how it actually is its the truth but#nobody ever fucking understands bc i cant. word it in a way that makes it make sense to people#like my most prominent 'delusion' i cant fucking explain it to people bc theyre like Woah thats rly rly rly concerning and sounds like its#rly harmful for yourself to believe that but it literally isnt I have to believe it bc its one of the only things that actually is keeping#me alive but if i ever fucking talk abt it nobody understands it#sometimes it is very scary and it makes me miserable that its true but i know that it is true. ive woken up in terror crying abt it Multiple#times but ik that its true and its a good thing its true bc it means i am alive roght now. as alive as i always am at least#but wtvr. the post wasnt even originally abt that#it was abt dropout stuff and like. yk. bc when i say I dropped out bc i was lazy and whiny ppl think im being mean 2 myself and erasing like#the depression and the ptsd and the Identity shit and the dissociation and the panic attacks and the seizures and grief and stuff#but its like. yes all that also was going on but i also was just lazy. if i wasnt lazy i couldve judt fucking graduated and i wouldnt be#trapped now#<- That is only true for me . ik thats like a stupid thing to say but this is why i cant rlt Be honest abt how i feel abt myself dropping#out is bc i get horrific fucking guilt bc i Was judt lazy and fucking stupid and i Am a bad person for not graduating hs#but that is not true for other dropouts for other dropouts deopping out doesnt mean youre dumb or lazy and it doesnt make you a bad person#but its different for me ik everybody thinks theyre the exception but i am i Am just lazy i am just stupid and its my fault. specifically.#idk i need to go lke slam my head into a wall.#idk what happened i wasnt fucking doing bad and then i made like. a loghthearted post abt sometjing and derailed in the tags and now its#oh i remembered. i tried to sign up for a ged class and encountered 1 obstacle and fucking gave up . God. i loterally havent changed at all#we neeedddd to get rid of connor or at least get a bew one in so fucking sick of being rhe one im so sick of being Connor i dont want it#anymore . head on pike#idk. im fine. im just habing a momey. im.probably judt pissy bc i didnt sleep. maybe ill take an edible
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what if instead of messaging me in the middle of the night about your stupid fucking girlfriend and your stupid fucking problems with her you actually act like my fucking friend and message me like how you message everyone else in our group
#bye ignore my venting bigger problems what fucking ever#im sick of her ass she only messages us for us to help her with her fucking girlfriend problems like we arent even friends atthis fckn point#and i love her shes so funny whatever but god shes literally the worst because i just want to be friends i dont fucking care ab her goddamn#selfish ass gf thats shes obsessed with. be obsessed tell me about it but cant we be friends ab other stuff too#we used to be her 'favorite friend' cause we shared so many interests and we hung around what fucking ever but fuck that right#get a gf and just use us to help better yalls relationship without even telling her you're sharing her private msgs w us huh yeah sure#what fucking ever im so done with this bitch and i cant even get my contacts out cause i have long nails and im js poking my eye#AND SHE WOULD NEVER BE SORRY if our friendship fell apart she would tell everyone i was jealous of her gf or what ever i literally dont care#she was like an older sister before i dont get why getting a gf would have to change shit like ok good for u but what ab us#what about me its not even fucking fair like is it that hard to keep up w ur friends?? NO its fucking not#taking me so long to write a post bc im still fucking helping her with her stupid dumb selfish idiotic gf omfg#just BREAK UP i literally dont fucking care just leave her if she makes u unhappy its literally online tf is she gonna do to u nothing omfg#why am i the one being punished when shes the one with the stupid dumb gf that hates her and herself i dont fucking care i js want m friend#and i cant tell any of our mutual friends cause she dont do that to them its js me so itd be like im being dramatic#and like shit i guess i am but i dont care atp thats all she ever talks to me ab like ok i get it i helped u but stop jfc#but if i said that we'd never talk again bc what fucking ever!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! cause im just dramatic whatever#if u cant resolve these simple problems of communication on ur own then maybe u shouldnt be in a relationship idk js my thoughts! die#sry the 1 person who knows what xactly i mean is asleep and im so tired of getting late night msgs being like hii can u help me SHUT UP#id love to help if we were actually still fucking friends but we arent so js leave me alone bruh#post#nickpost#will delete in morning my mom keeps telling me to put my phone down bt i need 2 say smfh 2 some1#i hate change i hate slight differences in my normal day to day i hate everything i hate not having smth to rely on i hate change i hate it#sry im alg now im js sick of her ass js leave bruh#nimbhe my moms yelling im tired anyway i need to js isolate myself forever no problems if im on an island alone#living my best life in the shade drinking idk water or whatever and just talking to myself bc who even needs friends right!!!!!!!!#its 11:11 make a wjsh#adding more cz whatever im deleting this ltr anyway#its so clear where i stand with everyone cause its always close but not close enough friendly but not friends and i guess its the same w her#bye im out of tags etc whatever nobody matching my freak ever never comfortable in any friendships
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When you deleted your reddit acount because the Soul Eater reddit doesnt like your posts
Nah but for real, say what you want about tumblr, but reddit is so much more anoying - but maybe thats most social media, tried uploading videos on tiktok only to get copyright stuck the same second or just have them deleted for vague comunity guidelines shit, maybe I was too hard on youtube.
I know crying about reddit is pathetic but I dunno, just let me vent lol, idunno gotta get my shit together, too many distractions and other bullshit.
#soul eater reddit#but yeah i dunno I have thin skin so it got annoying when low effort jokes got upvoted while my love effort joke seemed to offend people lo#but in general I saw interesting questions with nobody writting anything to answer#like I get most people dont care and just want to see fanart or whatever but with the death of forums its kinda sad#like it is a kinda âOldâ anime so you would assume the fans would be older and have something to say#but tbh I was allways anti reddit so jokes on me for trying to give them a chance and fit in when I just dont vibe with their âstyleâ#like tbh I dont allways with tumblr#but atleast this website is usefull on its own like a blog and all while reddit is just shitting your shit into other peoples faces#and atleast here there are some interesting people with oppinions and shit#I probably should just have written it in the post and not tags lol idk#and I know its my own fault for procrastinating from work and the projects im actually supposed to do#but tbh the lips of the tatoos could be ragnarok lips and the haha's could be laughs of madness so its even more fitting-#but I guess Im the only one who found this joker funny ironically lol i dunno#is there some fancy word for bad impulse control yet or is that just called being a manchild baby?#so yeah i dunno what Im even trying to say anymore just a strange week or something i dont even know#also the iceberg videos didnt get many upvotes anymore so I doubt I lose much visibility but lets see with the next video#which sadly isnt coming soon#maybe now I will actually do the thing I promised myself#I dunno just imagine this is some private theraphy positve reafirmation journal#i'll try to not log in again for a few days or something maybe I should que the post for the screencaps acount for a month and not just wee#idk#yeah...sorry#also fuck reddit#and social media#and tiktok
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Realizing I might have gotten POTS because of Covid and.
#pots syndrome#i feel like a conspiracy theorist but-#but. covid seems most likely.#i wasn't born with it or anything#(at least i don't think?)#(family thinks i was born with it/have had it for a while?)#it could be genetic maybe? (family has a history of immune disorder stuff)#(+my immune system was already shit)#tbh i haven't OFFICIALLY been diagnosed (tilt test results came back incomplete?)#(neuro and i are both ??? and he's going to ask what that means since afaik i did the whole test)#(but it looks like he's treating it like POTS)#just. idk where I'm going with this.#just. mad ig?#first time i got COVID i was working somewhere where NOBODY ELSE thought it was a big deal#i was the only one wearing a mask#second time spouse accidentally brought it home from work#idk which one caused it but.#i know it could've been worse (asthma + shit immune system) but#idk just. even doing everything right and this still happened#rambling in the tags#delete later
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god i am fucking pathetic
#the irony of this after posting happily about things that make me happy earlier today does not escape me.#it's just#i want someone to do things with because doing things alone is scary and lonely#âdo it scared do it aloneâ i know people will say but you can't tell me it's not easier with someone there.#and i have literally nobody#of my 2 local friends: one hasn't spoken to me in about 6 months and idk what even happened#the other has left the fucking country living all my wildest dreams and also being fucking stupid about it#my brother is around but always does things with his boyfriend now even things that he had promised me to do togethe4#which is his right and he's allowed but fuck if it doesnt make me feel like chopped liver#and social shit happening at bars and breweries and stuff makes me so anxious because#i really don't drink much anymore and i don't like it#i'm so fucking lonely and pathetic#i have one person and he's halfway acrosd the world#anna dot txt#i guesd for tagging if i don't delete this
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âI want every perimeter of this warehouse locked downânow. No one gets in or out unless I authorize it. Is that clear?â
âDouble the guard on every exit. Sweep the surrounding area. I donât care if you have to go block by blockâmake sure none of those bastards slip through.â
âCommissioner! Thereâs someone here.â
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âQuickly, get some paramedics down here. No one touches Batgirlâs maskâis that understood?â
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âGet the paramedics to stabilize her, but thatâs itânothing more. No one treats her except Dr Leslie Thompkins.â
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âWhat of the drug dealers?â
âWe managed to catch most of them, sir. They were distracted by Batgirlâs appearanceâprobably trying to figure out what to do with her when she showed up and foiled their dealings tonight. But⌠a few managed to escape in the chaos.â
âDamnit. Notify the precinct to put out an APB. I want every available unit on this. Weâre not letting this operation slip through the cracks.â
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âI donât care whoâs out there or how far they think theyâve gotten. Weâre shutting this operation once and for all. If Batgirl risked her life for this, we owe her this much.â
âSirâŚâ
âWhat?â
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âIâm sorry, CommissionerâŚ. Batgirl⌠sheâs dead.â
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âWhat. Happened.â
âBruce, please calm downââ
âWhere is my daughter?â
âBruceââ
âLeslie. Where. Is. My. Daughter.â
âIâIâm sorry, Bruce. I tried everythingââ
âWhere is she? I need to see her. Now.â
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Where did it go wrong?
How did it come to this?
Bruce sworeâsworeâheâd never let what happened to Jason happen again. Not to any of them. Heâd built walls, created rules, pushed himself to the breaking point to ensure it. All of it was to stop thisâthisâfrom happening.
So why⌠why was he staring at your lifeless body now? Why was the weight of his failure suffocating him all over again? Why had he failed you, just like he failed Jason?
His fists clenched at his sides as he took a shaky step forward. His breath hitched, and for the first time in a long time, the weight of helplessness settled heavily on his chest.
âGodâŚdamnitâŚâ he choked, his voice cracking under the weight of his grief. âOpen your eyes. Please.â
The room was too quiet. Too still. The sterile hum of the machines was a cruel mockery of life.
Bruce dropped to his knees beside the bed, his gloved hand trembling as he reached for yours. It felt so small, so cold.
âThis wasnât supposed to happen,â he whispered, his voice trembling, the words breaking apart with every syllable. âI promisedâI promised Iâd protect you. And I couldnât even do that.â
He bowed his head, his forehead brushing against your hand as his grip tightened. âIâm sorry. I failed you.â
so⌠đŤŁ
have this while i continue working on chapter 3 and 4 đĽ°
taglist (open): @tricksters-maze @dusk-muse @quethekillerqueen @silverklaus @isupportorbitalbombardment @nxdxsworld @vanessa-boo @coffeeaddictxd @moonsbluekingdom @yuya-bubbly @percythebitchwitch @anonymousdisco @jason-todd-fangirl-14 @redsakura101 @what-0-life @idkwhattoputhete @secretyouthcomputer @witch-waycult @allycat4458 @dazed-lavender @eclecticfurylady @wizzerreblogs @marsmabe @daddysfangirls-dc @hoeinthehouse @beeweensblog @ilxandra @agent-nobody-knows @thethingwiththefeathers @mochiivqi @pix-stuff @narration-ator @nebulousmoon3990 @delias-stuff @froggy-voidd @jjsmeowthie @kore-of-the-underworld @nen-nyy @juthesillylesbain @vikkus-main @emilylouise123 @blueiones @horror-lover-69 @chaotic-fangirl-blog @wassupbroski55555 @reallyromealone @plsfckmedxddy @sea-glasses @203moonysello @luvly-writer @dovey-quacks2332 @love-theangel @hotdinosankles @vebbiewuzhere @animegirlfromvietnam @estreiiuh @simply-lovely78 @twismare @ssak-i @g4bbi3xx @buddee @alor-thes | ask to be added <3 (idk why i canât tag some of yâall, must be your settings i think đ)
#angst#batsis#batfamily#batfam x batsis#batfam x reader#batsisreader#bruce wayne x daughter reader#damian wayne x sister reader#dick grayson x sister reader#jason todd x sister reader#tim drake x sister reader#cassandra cain x sister reader#bruce wayne#dick grayson#jason todd#tim drake#damian wayne#cassandra cain#alfred pennyworth#barbara gordon#stephanie brown#duke thomas#x reader#batman#imagine#regressed reader#regressor reader#platonic batfam#platonic batfam x reader#undoing fate
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All Yours
"I'm going to fucking ruin you." / "I won't apologize for marking you up, everyone should know you're taken." / "I don't want anyone else. No one can make me feel like you do."
@somethingvicked tagging you because I accidentally deleted the original ask đŹ just wanted to say thanks for the request and a big, fat SORRY for taking so long. i was scrolling through my drafts the other day and saw this was like a year old and the shame managed to motivate me enough to finish this. Ooops again and I hope you enjoy!! Comments, likes, and reblogs are always cherished đ
Eddie Munson x F! Reader
AN: 18+ only!!!!!!, car sex, partially-clothed sex, piv, semi-public, titty worship, humping, dacryphilia, unwarranted jealousy, porn with a little plot, eddie's self-depricating at the beginning but he fucks like a god, very possesive! eddie, multiple orgasms, one (1) mention of pregnancy but it's off-hand and mostly unrelated to the sex, unprotected sex, I took the spirit of the prompts more than the literal wording, this is very different for me and maybe rushed? idk you tell me đ
Eddie always jokes that you're his second love.
His vanâwith its stained upholstery, rattling frame and the battery on its last legâwas here first, he says. And despite everything previously mentioned, he treats that car like his baby.
So when he slams his door hard enough to rattle the glass in the window, it wouldnât take a genius to know something is up.
Eddie sits silently in the half-light, gripping at the steering wheel with both hands and gnawing at his bottom lip until the skin turns white.
"Everything okay?"
He won't even look at you when he shoves the key in the ignition.
"Sure," Eddie says, but there's a bite to his voice, quiet over the roaring grind of the starter, "why wouldn't it be?"
The car does startâdespite his abuse to the engineâand you prop your feet up on the dash, raising your brows as he tears out onto the empty street.
"Ohhh-kay. Is this aboutâ"
You don't even get a chance to take a guess.
"It's not about Steve."
Eddie spits Steve's name at the window and the passing trees, their leaves blurring into inky smudges. You watch his jaw tick, eyes flashing from the road to the rear-view mirror, but never to you.
His resolve falters with the press of your hand against his on the gearshift.
"Really? âCause I was going to ask if this was about Patrick Swayze?â
The speedometer ticks up for a quick beat, and then drops, and Eddie squirms in his seat.
He steers off to the right, and the van shakes as the tires bump off the smooth pavement to the gravel edge of the road, little twigs snapping off on the trees outside against the fading paint.
"Fuck," Eddie grumbles, quiet, like he's having a conversation with himself. His fingers catch in his curls when he takes the other hand from the steering wheel. It's dark out here, away from the street lights, but you still catch the shine glazing his lower lashes, the way he blinks to keep any tears from pooling there.
"I mean, it's no big deal," you tell him, petting over his knuckles with your thumb, "I just wish you would have said something."
You're not sure what lies were spread to make sure the goofy little pre-teens didn't show up for movie night and try to break down Steve's door. You just knew thatâfor onceâeverybody piled on the couch in the living room was of legal age.
It seemed like an exciting prospect when the night started, but everything was pretty much the same: just more beer, and fewer voices shouting about whatever movie you were gonna watch.
Nancy and Robin were a united front when they pulled out Dirty Dancing, and you joined them, mostly to annoy Steve when he pretended he wasn't interested.
Eddie grumbled about the choice, arm slung around your shoulder, but he came around, eventually. Nobody can resist the allure of Johnny Castle.
However many beers you had may have been one too many, though, because as soon as the credits started rolling, Steve had yanked you from Eddie's grasp and onto your feet as Nancy and Robin were cheering jump jump jump and you ran, stumbling into Steve's arms with a surprisingly powerful leap. Then you were floating, high above the living room with a bird's eye view of the crushed beer cans and Hostess wrappers littered over the carpet for one glorious second.
Until you landed in a giggling heap with Steve groaning beneath you, the room shaking with laughter to the point of tears, until Robin threatened to pee her pants.
Now that you've sobered up a little, you recognize that Eddie hadn't been laughing along.
He lets his head fall back against the headrest, eyes big as saucers, pathetic like a little dog who's about to get yelled at for pissing on the couch, and he twists the hand that's resting beneath yours until your fingers intertwine, gives you a squeezeâa move you recognize as an apology before he's got the words for what he's feeling.
"You know I'm not interested in Steve, right?" you ask, squeezing back.
Eddie nods, but his eyes tell a different story. He carries this thing with himâa kind of self-conscious bewilderment each time you reach for him in a crowd, press your lips to his, call him your boyfriend when there are people around to hear it.
It's kind of funny how much it doesn't make sense to you, how you assumed that, deep down, Eddie knew that you loved him, but also how badly you wanted him. That it wasn't some kind of fluke or coincidence or apathy that kept you here.
Eddie's breath catches in his chest, like he's trying not to cry, and you know you were wrong. You're not doing nearly good enough a job at making Eddie feel half as loved as he is.
You slip your hand from his, resting it just above his kneeâan innocent start for your more illicit plansâscooting in your chair until you're almost nose to nose, lower your voice into a whisper.
"I'm serious, honey. You've got nothing to worry about."
Your plan is working already. Eddie swallows hard enough you can see his adam's apple jump in his throat, and his gaze keeps flickering from your eyes to the hand you've got on his thigh, climbing higher with each soothing stroke.
"Yeah, I-I know, baby, it's justâ" his breath hitches, but he's fighting to get the words out, wet lips parting with a heavy breath as your fingers travel higher, thumb in the crease between his thigh and his crotch, "it's Steve Harrington."
His voice jumps an octave on Steveâs name, and your quiet laughter comes out in little breaths.
âI don't want to talk about Steve Harrington."
Your words hit his mouth in a puff of hot air, and Eddie gasps into the kiss that follows, moaning a little when your palm meets the zipper of his jeans and his swelling cock beneath. The tip of his nose digs into your cheek, one of his big hands finding your waist, trying to pull you closer, or as close as he can with the center console in the way.
"God, baby. Need you- need you so bad," he huffs, but youâre already breaking from the kiss, lifting your hips from the seat as you crawl into the space between Eddieâs warm chest and the steering wheel.
âThen you can have me,â you tell him, settling your weight in his lap, grasping around for the lever thatâll give you a little extra space. The seat rattles back until it stops with a heavy clunk, and Eddie has to dig his teeth into his bottom lip to keep quiet when your body lurches into his.
He wonât meet your eyes, looking out the blackened windows, checking the car like somebodyâs gonna pop out from the back seat.
âWhat? Uh, I meanâlike, here?â
You take Eddieâs face in both your hands, relishing the scratch of the sparse stubble peppering his jaw. Out of habit, his hands come to rest on your thighs, and you hum in approval.
âWheneverââ you whisper, shifting your hips back just to bring them forward again, the crotch of your jeans meeting the bulge in his, rattling the chains hooked to his belt loops. Eddieâs neck goes taut, head pressed back against the seat.
âWhereverâ â you place your lips at the delicate skin heâs revealed, just brushing along the column of his throat. When you meet his eyes again, Eddieâs pupils are blown wide.
âAnd however you want me, Eddie. Iâm all yours.â
âYouâre all mine,â he repeats back to you, and his hands echo the sentiment, his confidence growing as he moves around to grip at your ass cheeks, pulling you more fully against him until he can grind up on you, his lips at your neck now, planting messy kisses at the edge of your throat that have you digging your fingers into his hair just to keep him there.
Your boyfriend's got a big dickâfucking hung like a horse, although he doesn't seem to know it, and he's already throbbing and heavy in his jeans, bucking his hips into you like he's trying to get you pregnant before heâs even inside you.
"Eddie," you sigh his name, just to admire the feeling of it, and he lets out a groan that has you dripping, the damp fabric of your panties sticking to your cunt and dragging over your clit with each shift of his hips.
"Yeah, baby?" he asks, and you hardly notice his hands at the zipper on your jacket, trailing it down, down, down until he can slip it from your shoulders, gripping at your tits through your tank top.
"You feel soâfuck," he's cut you off mid-sentence, pulling the neckline of your top down until your breasts are free, nipples already pebbling in the cool air. Eddie pinches one of them in between two fingers, the metal of his rings biting at the other until you gasp.
"Yeah?" he repeats, harder this time, the word mumbled into your tits. Eddie's smothering himself, licking and kissing and teething his way as he moves to replace one of his hands with his mouth over the dark, stiff peak.
He sucks the bud between his lips, glides his tongue over the sensitive skin there. The sound of your moans fills the car, and suddenly the pressure of his cock isn't enough when there's so much fabric between you. You can't pull away, though, not with how his free arm has circled your waist, forcing the sway of your hips.
"Eddie," you call out again, but he just grunts, onto the other breast now, fucking devouring you in a way only he can.
He's not stopping, teeth scraping at your skin and his lips pursed, sucking the life out of you while his other hand pinches and flicks the other stiff bud, still damp with his spit.
It's almost frightening how close he's gotten you, and just from thisâthe movement of his hips and his worshiping mouth.
"Eddie."
There must be something different in the way you say it this time, because he listens, finally, snaking his hand down between your bodies, slipping the button on your jeans and shoving his fingers inside until they reach the apex of your aching cunt. Your vision goes foggy, on the verge of tears from the relief of something solid pressed right up against your clit.
And his mouth doesn't stray from your tits, single-minded in a way only somebody like Eddie could be, sucking at your nipples until they both shine.
His fingers curl, perfect, sitting right where you need them as you grind and grind and grind your hips, brain turning to jelly with the way he's making you feel.
You feel Eddie's teeth bite a perfect circle on the inside of your breast, and that's what pulls you under.
You're practically screaming, and Eddie still won't stop, letting you ride out the perfect feeling of him, maybe hoping you'll remember this moment the next time Steve sees you. Just the idea of meeting up with your friends again after this has you flushing so deep you think you might combust right here.
The sparks fade slowly, your pussy still shaking and empty, wet enough you're sure you've soaked Eddie's fingers and he finally relents, his plump, pink lips tracing your collar bones, stopping at the edge of your jaw. He takes the delicate skin their between his teeth and sucks, hard.
That jolts you from your stupor. You press his head back, one hand on his forehead so you can make him look you in the eyes.
"Heyâthat's gonna bruise."
You're scolding has no effect; Eddie's on a different plane now, cocky from making you cum so easily and still a little peeved from earlier, pressing past your hold on him until he can reattach himself to your neck.
"Not sorry," he tells you, marking you up between staccato shifts of his hips, "wanna make sure everybody knows you're mine."
It's impenetrable logicâyou couldn't argue with him if you wanted to, and you really, really don't want to when he makes his way to your mouth, kissing you, his tongue against yours and his hot, heavy breaths, one hand balled in the fabric of your tank top at the middle of your back.
"Turn around," he tells you, guiding you into compliance with his hands at your waist, and it makes you dizzy, feeling like you'd end up on the ceiling if Eddie didn't keep his grip on you, pulling you tight against him until your back meets his chest.
Itâs like he's touching you everywhere, hands on your hips and your tits and pushing your hair up off your neckâlooking for more skin that he hasn't painted yetâso you're not prepared when the chair falls back, left breathless and unmoored, staring at the stained upholstery on the roof of Eddie's van.
"You good?" Eddie asks in response to the gasp you let out, urging your hips into the air as he tugs your jeans and your underwear down around your thighs.
You just nod, too desperate for any explanation, to say anything at all. Eddie's turned you stupid, has you whining into his neck when you lean your head back on his shoulder, looking up at his jaw with wild, tear-filled eyes.
"Gonna ruin you for anybody else, sweetheart," he tells you over the sound of his jangling belt, his hot cock pressed against your back. "Gonna make sure you never leave me."
You nod, fucking rabid when he shifts and you can finally feel the fat tip of his dick at your entrance, smearing the first taste of his cum over your lips.
"Nobody else, Eddie," you promise him, "just you."
Eddie takes his cock in his hand, teasing it over your pussy, nudging it against your clit until you jump in his arms. He grips tighter at your waist, holding you just under your tits to keep you still.
"Promise?" he asks.
The tears that slip down your cheeks and onto his neck must be answer enough, because Eddie slides inside you, just the tip, and the relief at even this small feeling of fullness has you crying out.
Eddie's thrusts are methodical and relentless, slow at first, but they build quickly, his hips slamming into you, his grunts from exertion and from pleasure low in your ear. And you're moaning, too, like putty against him, totally enraptured as you watch the muscles in his jaw flex, beads of sweat collecting at his hairline.
He keeps hitting this spot inside you, has you full to the brim, and you're so wet you half-wonder if your pussy juice is soaking into the seat.
It feels like the van is rocking with the force of his thrusts, steam collecting around the edges of the windows from your shared breaths. Itâs obscene how in to this you are, how loud it sounds, the wet squelch of your poor cunt echoing around the interior of his van.
"You're gonna cum for me, baby," he tells you, "wanna feel you squeezing my cock."
Four of his fingers meet at the top of your thighs, rubbing steady circles over your clit. You think you might be screaming.
Eddie has you cumming like you're being raptured, twitching in his lap, tits bouncing as he fucks into you, deeper than before until your vision blacks out and you can't see or feel or think of anything but perfect Eddie Munson and his perfect fucking cock.
It's dark when you come to. Maybe he fucked you blind.
Your vision returns, though, just in time. Eddie's chest heaves beneath you, and he pulls out with a grunt, his cum and yours dripping down your thighs in a sight so lurid it's got you flushing down to your neck.
That's definitely going to stain the upholstery.
Eddie doesn't seem to care, stroking his heavy hands over your thighs, pulling your clothes back into placeâgentle where they had been rough, his mouth dotting soft kisses against the back of your spine.
Eddie shifts you around in his lap, let's his big eyes find yours. Your fingers twine with his, and he laughs a little when you kiss at his knuckles.
"You know," Eddie says, cheeks pink and a stupid smile on his face, "now that I think about it, Dirty Dancing might be my new favorite movie. I mean, who doesnât love Patrick Swayze?"
#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson x you#eddie munson smut#eddie munson x female reader#eddie munson fanfic#stranger things fanfic#my writing
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Never made it as a wise man
(joel miller x f!reader)
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Description: Joel solves your car troubles for free, and you try to return the favor with a homecooked meal. When you accidentally interrupt his jerkoff session, you take a chance and help him out.
Note: yâall are out here answering godâs toughest questions, like what if emotionally unavailable Joel was loved unconditionally? or what if Joel was the Mothman?, and I deeply appreciate that.Â
However, today, I am here to answer a question that nobody askedâ What if Joel was a divorced dad rock kinda guy?Â
You know, like, listening to Nickelback on an old-school boombox in his garage, or unironically singing Creed on the way to work, or bonding with Ellie over Papa Roach? And also, (inspired by a genius) what if he was a little bit pathetic?Â
Anyway, I present to you: divorced dad rock dilf, Joel, ta-da! (my humble submission for @hellishjoelâs hot dilf summer challenge) obvs dedicated to: @auteurdelabre
ao3: read here | masterlist: here | part 2 here | part 3 here
Tags/warnings: AU no outbreak divorced Joel x f!reader, Sarah is not mentioned, but Ellie is your adult coworker, reader is clueless about cars and so am I, gratuitous smut and horny thoughts, implied jorkinâ joel but no witnesses, hand job, fingering, premature ejaculation, touch starved kinda loserish but hot divorced dilf joel, heâs a real tiddy guy in this one and idk why it just happened, pwp, is it a crackfic? maybe, but i meant it wholeheartedly so idk Â
WC: 4.2k
You pull onto the long driveway, hoping to see Joelâs truck. You forgot to text first to see if he would be around, but he did tell you to come by if you ever needed anything. You mostly just hope heâll be willing to accept your gift.Â
Last week, heâd helped you out by fixing your car. He told you what the issue was, but he might as well have been speaking another language when he described it. You had already brought coffee and a plate of cookies to your coworker Ellie to thank her for dragging you to Joelâs to ask for help. Being in a new town was hard enough, but you had no idea how you would handle the price for diagnostics, let alone whatever the repair wouldâve cost. You tried to offer Joel the cash you had as a thanks, but he wouldnât accept it. You tried to argue with him, but Ellie told you it wasnât worth arguing with him. He wouldnât budge. Instead, he had offered to change your oil for you, making you feel even more indebted to him.Â
At first, the most you got out of Ellie for intel on Joel was that he was the one responsible for you having to listen to âOne Last Breathâ and âLips of an Angelâ at ungodly early hours. Ellie claimed that her music taste was deeply influenced by Joel, and somehow, Ellie is always in charge of the music at work. When you rolled your eyes calling it divorced dad rock, she let it slip that you were right about that.Â
That explains a lot when you remember the brief time you spent in his house and shop. The house was clean inside but not tidy. Stray beer bottles and travel mugs dotted the counter and coffee table. But the shop had all the Divorced Dad Barbie accessories.Â
The project car and crates of assorted parts. The beer fridge and the plastic lawn chairs in the corner for bullshitting with whoever stopped by. The boombox on the workbench with the stack of CDs. And the fading calendar from another decade with the naked woman kneeling on the beach.Â
You hadnât been able to stop your eyes from darting to her sultry expression and swimsuit model-perfect breasts when Joel had been explaining what he was going to do to your car. You wondered if the heat burning in your cheeks had given you away, but he didnât notice then. Ellie sure did, though, and she had rolled her eyes at you, noting it had been up so long she even forgot it was there.Â
Luckily, Ellie didnât notice your eyes lingering on Joelâs body. You werenât trying to be a creep, but the way his arm flexed when he opened the hood of your car gave you some feral brand of intrusive thoughts. The ratty band t-shirt and the faded jeans were working for him, too, or at least they were doing something for you. Time slowed when your eyes trailed over his arms and down the muscles of his broad back. He just seemed so⌠solid. You finally understood what your friends back home meant when they said they wanted to climb a man like a tree. You had jumped a little when Ellie slammed the fridge behind you and shouted at Joel about how he canât just live in the shop drinking shitty beer and eating beef jerky. She had grabbed your arm to drag you to the house for an iced tea while he worked.Â
Her comment sparked your idea. You figured Joel must be a utilitarian type. He probably lives on frozen pizzasâor even worse, those Hungry-Man frozen TV dinnersâinstead of making himself something fresh. Maybe heâs one of those guys who got really into smoking meats instead. Either way, you hope the lasagna you made from scratch and the other tray of cookies will be an acceptable thank you for his help. He canât refuse it if you already made it, right?Â
You pull up next to a truck, assuming itâs his, and that heâs home. Before you grab the tray, you pause to check your reflection and adjust your breasts in your white tank top, making sure your cleavage pokes out as temptingly as possible.Â
You check yourself in the mirror with a look. Why does it matter what you look like? Itâs not like youâre trying to fuck your only (almost) friendâs dad, right? Although she calls him by his first name, not Dad, so maybe thereâs like a loophole or something if sheâs adopted. You think about the calendar model and her perfect tits hanging on the wall over his tools. It canât hurt to just do a little harmless flirting, right? Maybe you arenât even his type anyway.Â
After knocking on the door a couple of times, you frown, wondering if heâs not home. On the way back to your car, with your head hung in defeat, your ears perk up at the sound of something clanging in the shop. Of course!Â
You skitter back to the front porch to leave your goods by the door and head for the shop to find that divorced DILFâJoel, you mean. Itâs sweltering out, and sweat is beading on your chest after only a few minutes in the heat. The closer you get, the more easily you can make out the sound of his little CD player blasting another brooding, raspy ballad sung by a white man with a troubled love life.Â
The garage door is shut, so you knock on the door on the side of the building. You wait a minute before testing your luck and opening the door yourself. Assessing the shop, you donât see your man, sorry, Joel, at first glance. The music blasts, and the calendar model gives you the same impish smirk through her false lashes and a layer of dust, but thereâs no Joel. The evidence clearly dictates that heâs in here somewhere, as his tools are strung around his project, the lights are on, and a beer with a sweating label sits on the edge of the workbench.Â
You arenât trying to be sneaky. You didnât think to holler and announce your presence over the music. Plus, you didnât fully get your bearings the last time you were here. Now, you can pick up a few more details as your eyes absorb everything they can about anything that gives you a hint about who this guy is.Â
The guy thatâs been haunting your dreams for a week. Last week, when you walked back to the shop with Ellie to check on your car, you nearly tripped, watching Joel wipe the sweat off his face with the bottom of his shirt. You had just caught a glimpse of the trail of hair disappearing under his jeans, but it was enough to replay in your mind every night as you created your little scenarios to carry you off to sleep.Â
The scent memory was somehow worse. It was so easy to transport yourself back in time with the thought of the sweaty musk and the grease or oil smeared on his fingers. It shouldnât turn you on, right?Â
You remember thinking he seemed so knowledgeable when describing the issue. You had no idea what he was talking about, but his low voice and patience were enough to tell you he could talk you through anything.Â
You notice a few other details as you enter his sacred space today. The woodworking projects, the band posters, and the pictures with Ellie and other family members tacked to the wall over another workbench.Â
Still, no Joel, however.Â
You circle the partially disassembled project truck and see a door to another room. It would be the office if the shop were a professional business. Thereâs a window along the wall, but instead of a boss watching an employee, itâs you hoping to see that brawny man and his dark curls.Â
As you step closer, you nearly squeal. There he is. Well, at least, you can see the broad shoulders and back youâve been picturing above you in bed. You practically skip to the door. Itâs already open a crack, and you give it a knock, calling his name as it swings open from the force of your rapping knuckles.  Â
The next moment is a blur.Â
âShit, fuck, hold on!â Joel shouts gruffly as he slams the door in your face. But you already heard it. The phony wailing noises that came from the busted speaker on his phone.Â
You still face the closed door, trying to process the interaction before he wrenches the door back open. Heâs breathing rapidly, chest rising and falling, as he looks at you with wide eyes that quickly narrow.Â
âWhat are you doing here?â he barks.Â
Your hands fall to your sides, and you start to step back, ready to turn and run.Â
He catches your fear and tries to adjust, but youâre faster.Â
âSorry,â you mumble as you turn and try to dash away. Joelâs quick, too, though, and he grabs your wrist.Â
âHey, wait,â he loosens his grip when you spin back towards him, âI just didnât hear you cominâ. Wasnât expecting you.âÂ
âSorry,â you repeat, stuttering as you continue, âI-I just, uh, just wanted to say thanks for your help last week.â You stare at the floor. Unsure why youâre embarrassed, you feel so small after he saw your face and practically shouted at you.Â
âAll right,â he rumbles. Youâre too busy staring at the crack in the concrete floor to notice how his eyes are glued to your exposed skin. Or to see the blotchy red flush that crawls up his neck and toward his face.Â
But your brain starts to catch up. Joel mightâve snapped at you, but youâre the one that caught him in the act. You donât lift your head, but your eyes trail over his stained and faded jeans until youâre studying his crotch.Â
Bingo. Itâs almost too easy. You can make out the outline of his erection tucked up in his waistband. Even more glaring evidence is the open fly. You wish you had caught what he was watching. How does he like it? What does he search for when he wants to jerk off in the back office on a hot Saturday afternoon?Â
He clears his throat, and you snap your attention to his face. âWas there somethinâ you needed?â He asks.Â
âYes.â You tell him youâve got a lasagna that should get into a fridge before it reheats in the sun. He follows you toward the front door and into the house, not missing how your hips sway as you lead.Â
Once the tray is shoved into the fridge, nestled between some takeout containers, he turns to thank you. âYou didnât need to do all that,â he gruffs over the cookies and homemade meal.Â
You step back to lean against the counter, littered with mail and more coffee cups, and let yourself check him out up close. His faded Creed t-shirt has holes around the neck. Heâs got that same sweaty man musk going on, and you wish you knew why that stirred your arousal, but your pussy lacks logic.Â
âI know, I know,â you reply, âbut you really saved my ass with the car, and I wanted to do something for you. You know, some way to pay you back?âÂ
âAll right, well, thanks,â he trails off. He doesnât seem to know what else to say. Maybe you should be on your way already, but heâs not ushering you out the door.Â
This time, you do catch when his eyes drop to your chest. Thereâs no way youâre imagining the tension between you as you stand in his kitchen while he stares at your barely clothed tits, right? Fuck it. Youâre gonna go for it.Â
You take a step towards him. âI wasnât sure if it was really enough,â your voice is soft and tempting, and your sweet perfume wafts towards him like a lust potion. Joel swallows thickly as you approach.
He knows you mustâve put it together, but he tried to delude himself. Maybe you couldnât hear the theatrical screams of the woman he was watching get railed before he slammed the door in your face. He hopes all you heard was Chad Kroegerâs voice screaming, âThis time I'm mistaken
For handin' you a heart worth breakin'â from the stereo.. on the other side of the shop.Â
âYou worked so hard,â you continued with one final step, and now youâre nearly toe-to-toe in front of him. âThere has to be something else I could do.â Youâre so close to him. He forgets to respond. It takes all his power to keep his eyes on your face.Â
You have a wild urge to taste the sweat on his neck, but you keep your tongue to yourself. He hasnât made any move to encourage you, but he hasnât stopped you yet either, so you figure itâs worth taking a risk.Â
âMaybe youâve got a problem I could help you with.â You go for it, reaching your hand out to palm at the bulge in his jeans.Â
Again, too many things happen at once. Joel snaps out a âWhat?â in disbelief. His hand circles your wrist tightly. His hips jerk, involuntarily bucking into your palm. Your glossy lips part into an âoâ shape at the size of his not-quite-hard cock. And now youâre both locked into this position like statues.Â
His fingers stay firmly wrapped around your wrist, but he doesnât pull you away. Your fingers squeeze over his jeans, and your eyes flash wide as you can feel his cock twitch and stiffen at your touch. The touch that rapidly overrides your better judgment, drowning you in want. Your clit twitches itself in response, your nipples strain under your thin tank top, and your eyelids feel heavy immediately.Â
âWhat are you doing?â His voice crackles like he hadnât just used it. You slide your hand to pop the button on his jeans, and he releases your wrist as you flip it to slip your fingers under the waistband of his boxers in search of his cock.Â
âLet me help,â you say in more of a whispered tone. The searing heat between Joelâs legs makes you salivate. Your fingers graze coarse curls before you acquire your target, wrapping your palm and fingers around his thick shaft. His size has your cunt throbbing in your shorts.Â
Joelâs eyes are squeezed shut. He looks nearly in pain. You pull your hand back out to let the pool of saliva on your tongue drip into your palm.Â
âJesus,â he breathes out, watching your lewd maneuver. âYou wanna help?â He repeats your plea in the form of a question, a little dumbfounded. Heâs trying to figure out whatâs happening right now.Â
âI do,â you answer in a honeyed voice as you dig your hand back into his pants. Heâs unable to respond with words as you swirl your palm over the head of his cock, mixing saliva and precome, but his body eggs you on. He bucks into your fist, and you work quickly, pumping his throbbing length. The slick noises are muffled by the layers of clothing, but the grunts that catch in his throat shoot piping-hot desire straight into your core.Â
He looks a little desperate, eyes slammed shut again, jaw slack, arms hanging uselessly at his side. And for god knows why, the entire scene pulls a moan from your lips. The sweet sound snaps Joel back to attention. His hands shoot straight to your breasts, cupping them gently to feel them bounce against the motion of your arm wrestling with his jeans to keep stroking his cock.Â
Theyâre so close to spilling over your tank top on their own. Joel canât resist tugging the thin material until they spill over the top. The sight alone nearly has him coming in his pants. But then you moan so loudly when he squeezes them both and pinches at your nipples, and he really canât stop.Â
âFuck, fuck, wait,â he spits out, but itâs too late. His hips jerk erratically, thrusting into your slick fist, and heâs coming. It coats your hand and wrist and makes an absolute mess. You relax your grip when his whole body seems to shudder and gently remove your hand. He tries to choke his groan of frustration before it surfaces, but he immediately pauses his shame spiral when he sees you suck your come-coated fingers one by one.Â
âGod, thatâs so fucking hot,â you tell him. At the same time, heâs muttering curses at the sight of you. Youâre feeling a little giddy that all it took was your hand and showing your tits to have Joel losing control and spilling his load for you. It has your mouth curling into an impish grin.Â
Heâs got the sight of you half topless in his kitchen, licking your fingers, looking awfully proud of yourself, etching into his memory. Before the blood can return to his brain, he grabs you tightly by the ribs and walks you backward towards the counter. He lifts you onto it and wrenches open your shorts, yanking at them as you lift your hips so he can slide them off of you and drop them onto the kitchen floor.Â
Yes! Yes! Yes! The horny little goblins in your brain shriek and chant, incited by the rough and impulsive way Joel gropes at you. Itâs barbaric, and that delights you.Â
Sitting on the counter, you give him such perfect access to put his mouth on your breasts that he forgets what he was going to say. He mouths at each of them wetly, his beard tickling you as heâs busy sucking marks into your delicate skin. He sucks and bites at your strained nipples until your loud whines turn into a sharp gasp, and he pulls back.Â
The heavy-lidded look on your face has him diving back in for more, and you groan and arch into his touch. You rake your fingers into the curls at the back of his neck and tug at him. He grunts and moans into your skin, and it drives you wild. You need to feel him closer.Â
You grab the worn cotton on his shoulders until he lets you slip the shirt over his head and drop it onto the counter next to you. It gives you the briefest moment to take in the sight of his built chest and shoulders and softer midsection with that trail of hair you had memorized. You need to taste the salt on his skin.Â
Spreading your legs wider, he slots his hips against yours at the edge of the counter, and you run your tongue along his neck. You slide one of your hands down the smooth golden skin of his shoulder, and the other nestles back in his messy curls as his mouth finds yours.Â
He tastes like cheap coffee and the peppermint nicotine gum parked above his teeth along the left side of his mouth. You know itâs wrong that you canât get enough. But you're helpless when he pulls your bottom lip between his teeth, and you mindlessly roll your hips, seeking any relief.Â
Heâs grumbling in your ear about how it seems like you need help now, but you couldnât care less about the words coming out of his mouth. His deep voice alone could get you off. You let out an uninhibited whine at the thought.Â
âJesus Christ,â he pulls back. His head hangs, staring at the floor. He shakes it in what you assume is disbelief. You donât want to wait for him to think any further. You grab his hand, pulling it between your legs.
âReally, fucking, hot.â You echo your earlier declaration. Doing your best to sound assertive. You figure at least your soaked panties will prove your point.Â
âFuck,â he stifles a groan. Youâre so wet it coats his fingertips through the thin material. He nudges his fingers into you, over your panties, and you whimper for him. The fabric sticks to you and makes an obscene sound as he toys with you for only seconds. âOh, you do need my help. Hm?âÂ
You nod, spreading your legs wider for Joel to have access. He scoffs at you, displayed eagerly atop his kitchen counter. âJust desperate for me, arenât ya?â
You snap your legs back shut with a glare.Â
âNo way,â you press, jabbing a finger into his chest, âyou donât get to laugh at me like Iâm a slut for you when you just came in your pants for me.âÂ
His nostrils flare, and blotchy red patches creep up his neck again. You arenât sure what kind of bear youâve just, quite literally, poked.Â
âBut you are, arenât you?â He challenges. âYou came all this way in this excuse for a shirt, just for me.âÂ
He wedges his hand back between your closed thighs, and you relax just enough to let him work his way back to your core. Your breathing gives you away when it hitches and stutters as he traces his fingers along the hem of the fabric between your legs. You let your legs fall a little wider apart, and he sinks a finger beneath the hem and right inside of you to the knuckle.Â
A whiny noise rolls in the back of your throat.Â
âShh,â he sinks a second finger inside of you, and your muscles spasm and contract, âthatâs better, hmm?â He slowly pulls his fingers almost all the way out and then plunges them back in. He repeats this, and your core tenses as you writhe for him.Â
âYou need more?âÂ
âYes.âÂ
âYeah, you do.â He adds a third finger, and the slight stretch makes you hum.Â
âYou just need to be filled up, hm?â He teases you. Awfully confident now for a guy you just caught watching porn on his phone in a grimy back office in the middle of the afternoon.Â
But your noises and impatient movements spur him on. His sticky cock is filling out his jeans again. He nearly drools at the thought of the wet walls of your cunt, currently wrapped around his fingers, sliding over his cock instead. He knows you want it, too.
âDonât you?â He asks like you could read his mind.
âHm?â You hum absently. Empty headed. Youâre still taken by the entire pulpy, messy scene.Â
Reveling in the vulnerability of being spread open on his cluttered counter as youâre both half-dressed and panting in the otherâs hot breath. Any semblance of the lightness of your mood is quickly replaced with a blinding need. His fingers work into you, making obscene sounds, and then you add your own fingers. Circling your swollen clit just as he lets you in on his vision.Â
âYou wanna bounce on my lap. Fill this pussy with my cock.âÂ
âYes,â you hiss as you hover at the edge.Â
âYeah, thatâs it,â he watches your fingers working deftly over your swollen clit. The encouragement tips you over. Your body jolts erratically as you contract around his fingers, and bright sparks of pleasure course through you.Â
âYeah, youâre gonna ride me like fuckinâ champ,â he decides. You pull at his wrist when you start to feel overwhelmed, and he slides his wet fingers over your soft inner thigh. Heâs ready to grab you and carry you to the couch when both of your heads snap to attention at the sound of a door slamming in the driveway.Â
âShit,â he grumbles, looking for the clock on the stove before he remembers itâs definitely not set to the right time. You move nimbly, shimmying into your shorts, snapping your straps back over your shoulder, and brushing your hair out of your face.Â
âHey, wait,â he calls for you, but youâre on the move.Â
âLet me know when I can pick up the baking dish,â you call over your shoulder. Luckily, Joelâs next guest seemed to know him better. They were off to search the shop first, so you didnât collide with anyone before you got to your car. Joel stayed locked in the kitchen, catching his breath while you started to pull away. He didnât see that you stole his dirty Creed shirt off the counter before you skipped out the door.Â
When you grab it later to wear to bed, a naughty little smile tugs at the corners of your lips. When you pull the worn fabric to your nose to inhale deeply, you wonder if itâs one of those weird pheromone matches or something because youâre sure the sweaty man musk should be wrinkling your nose.Â
Instead, it makes you think of his big arms and chest filling out the shirt. And how his shoulder and back muscles ripple under his sun-bronzed skin. What theyâd look like coated in a sheen of salty sweat as he railed you, bent over his workbench, under the watchful eye of the calendar model and her flirty smize.Â
The image has you interrupting your own scenarios-before-bed time. Maybe Joel needs a model from this decade. You giggle, bunching up the t-shirt to snap a tasteful shot of some underboob cleavage, with the faded Creed logo on full display.Â
You send it off with no context, figuring itâs self-explanatory. Itâs less than a minute before your phone buzzes, and you feel the intoxicating rush rip through your body before you pick it up to see just the heading on your lockscreen:Â
Joel
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part 2 here | part 3 here
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do you believe me now? | 8
it's the morning after. spencer reid suspects youâre left with some doubts after losing your virginity to him. he has to figure out whyâwhich is hard when you're keeping secrets.
series masterlist
this series is 18+ warnings/tags: fem!reader, blood related to losing virginity (dramatized for the drama duh), super vague allusions to the BAU being hungover, mild blasphemy if anyone even cares, pondering god bc am I really a fanfic writer if I donât get a little religious w it, emily AND hotch are here and nobody knows why pls don't pay attention to that bc we are imagining like season 11/12 spencer and I'm inconsistent w who is unit chief in this series apparently, spencer slut lore, spencer emotional wounds lore, Spencer is a traumatic situationship survivor a/n: DADDYS HOMEEEEE (me and dybmn not spencer) anyway missed these little guys and am happy to be writing for them again!! idk what my upload schedule will becoming back to this but pls lmk what u think of this part, I have no idea how you will respond but I'm being brave and ily
Friday morning Spencer comes into the office fifteen minutes late (he tried his best), in yesterdayâs suit (everything in his go-bag had been too wrinkled), hair messy (no doubt from your fingers), coffee cold (heâs exhausted) and overall, in an excellent mood.
The rest of the team isnât faring quite as wellâSpencer gathers they stayed at the bar celebrating Derekâs birthday a lot later than he had. It shows through sallow skin and dark circles and the grimaces he receives on the way to his desk that are probably supposed to approximate good morningâs.Â
Honestly, he doesnât mind the dull moodâhe doesnât need the teasing and the prying questions that would be sure to come if his co-workers were at peak performance and were able to put together his unusually perky demeanor and disheveled appearance. At least Prentiss doesnât appear to be paying him any mind. Sheâs always the one who can read him like an open book and has no shame in doing so aloud. Echoes from years of, âso who was the lucky girl, last night, Reid?â Still ring through his mind and itâs like he can feel her finger prodding at his side.Â
The Emily of it all makes him smile, though the rest of the memory leaves a metal tang in his mouth. Back in those days, there were sometimes a lot of girls, but even then he was consciously aware he wasnât necessarily doing something he enjoyed. He spent a lot of time, actually, staring at his bedroom ceiling, psychoanalyzing himself. Repetition compulsion. The insatiable desire to repeat or reenact emotionally painful experiences. Maybe he thought if he could teach himself to subsist off of emotionless hookups, he could in some way heal from his experience with Elle. Though, heâs hesitant to think of it now as healingâitâs not like he didnât know what he was doing when a few nights after she said I donât feel the same Iâm sorry he opened up his front door for her. Itâs not like he didnât know what he was doing every time after that. So, maybe heal isnât the right word, when one doesnât have the right to be injured. Or when the injuries are, in a manner of speaking, self-inflicted. At the very least he could tell himself that this time around, meaningless sex was a choice he was making for himself. Spencer hates when things just happen to him.Â
But youâyouâre different. You were a complete surprise. At first, a cute and unexpected complication. After a few painful and short-lived attempts at real relationships, Spencer decided he was simply not to be trusted with emotional intimacy of any kind, including that which inevitably develops from physical intimacy, and would resign himself to a life of celibacy. He tried not to like you, but you were just so damn likable. Magnetic, to use a trite and perfectly honest turn of phrase. All that to say: he doesnât regret you at all. There is no filter of putrid shame or anguish over his memories of last night.Â
Just you. Perfect. Starlit. Glowing softly around the edges like youâre not even real.Â
I love you I love you I love you. A hymn with no melody. You, always reminding him exactly why he is decidedly not a man of faith. At least, not in the typical sense of the word.Â
How God became the idol and not Mary is lost on him. Thatâs why, Spencer supposes, tapping an eraser on his desk, marriage and sex were forbidden for so many ecclesiastics. After all, if they knew what it was to love a woman, specifically to love you, he doubts theyâd feel like spending much time in the pulpit. Love. Humans had that long before they had any gods. Itâs primeval. Itâs the most natural manifestation of devotion and worship. It will always have come first. Isnât it a better kind of religion when a man realizes he can kneel in front of a woman rather than an altar?
A heavy hand falling on his shoulder jolts him from his theological musingsâwhich are in all practicality useless. Whatâs that saying about blasphemous thinking on the FBIâs dime? Right. There isnât one.Â
âIâm scared to ask,â Morgan says as Spencer jumps slightly in his chair.Â
âWhat?â He mumbles, looking up from the document heâd only sort of been reading.
Morgan just looks at him, strong brows furrowed and a ditch between them, angles his head and glances to the side as if Spencer is missing the obvious. He almost follows Derekâs eye-line. When that doesnât work, Derek just says your name. Like your status is somehow in question.Â
âDid you two work things out, or not? It looked pretty bad when you guys were leaving last night.â
People often misunderstand an eidetic memory. Itâs not like things canât slip his mindâSpencer can actually be quite forgetful. Itâs made worse by the fact that last night at the bar feels like months ago. For a moment, he has no idea what Derek is referring to.Â
âOh. Oh! Right, weâright. Yeah, we, uhâwe worked it out.â Before Derek has a chance to read his face, no doubt as incriminating as his fumbled speech and an ill-timed throat clearing, he turns back to his paperwork. âThanks for keeping an eye on her at the bar. I appreciate that.â
Itâs quiet for a moment, and Spencerâs lips twist as he can feel the incoming inappropriate comment.Â
âIs that the same suit you were wearing last night?â Morgan quips, his wide grin audible. Spencer can practically hear the cartoon gleam of his friendâs bleached teeth.Â
âNo.â
âYou dog.â Derek is still smiling as he claps Spencerâs shoulder again. âWhat did you say to her that worked so well?â
Spencer clears his throat again and tries to look extremely involved in logging onto his computer, speaking quickly as if heâs beyond disinterested and canât wait for the exchange to be over.Â
âI donât know what youâre talking about. Iâm actually trying to work so if you wouldnât mind going back to your desk that would be great.âÂ
âUh-huh. Iâll let you work. But I see you, pretty boy.â
Spencer tries not to blush like a teenager as he refuses to look up.Â
Naturally the rest of the day is a slow descent into dread and madness as all those good feelings with which Spencer had started his morning begin to harden into something much worse, chilled by your lack of response to the text he sent you earlier. Which was essentially a rehashing of the note he left on your bedside table.Â
Maybe it was too much. It shouldâve been one or the other, but not both. Heâs overwhelmed you.Â
Okay, so maybe this is what religion is for. A last ditch effort when you canât talk to your girlfriend so you have to try talking to God.Â
But Spencer knows you, and he knows something is wrong. You wouldnât just ice him out so blatantly if everything was okay. He catches himself glancing up toward Hotchâs window to see if the blinds are drawn, and considers faking an illness to get out of work early and go check on you. But he powers through the remaining hour and a half that he is obligated to stay at work, he bounces a pencil between his fingers, drums at his desk, and gets nothing else done. As soon as 4:59 rolls around, heâs out.Â
Spencer can hear shuffling on the other side of your door as he stands in the hallway. A pot clatters. The walls hum with the rush of water through the pipes to your sink. He knocks, relieved that youâre okay and at the same time struggling with that weight on his chestâsomething cold that leans over his shoulders and whispers into his earâso she just didnât want to talk to you.Â
Suddenly all sound from inside your unit ceases. For a few long seconds, Spencerâs confusion only grows exponentially.Â
âWho is it?â You finally call, voice wavering. Also odd. Usually you just open the door.Â
âUm⌠Spencer?â
âAs in my boyfriend Spencer?â
He frowns, bottom lip jutting out ever so slightly as he tries to decipher your sudden paranoia. âI hope so?â
The click and jingle of several locks precipitates your much-anticipated reveal.Â
âCome in,â you say breathlessly, more harried than usual and not giving him the tender greeting heâs selfishly become accustomed toâbarely even giving him a second to look at you. But he steps inside, watching on in concern as you do up every single lockâthe one on the knob, the deadbolt, even the chain. Is this really all because of his little comment last night about anyone being able to get in? He certainly hopes not. He didnât mean to terrify you.Â
When you finally turn, he takes stock of your appearance. Big hoodie, pajama pants patterned in little hearts. Hair pulled back hastily. Your skin is sort of dull where you normally glow. But youâre beautiful, like always. It always aches just a little bit to look at you. Spencerâs always been like that. Going breathless at a particularly good piece of art or pretty girl. Like yourself. Mostly you.Â
You quickly turn to hurry back into the kitchen. âI was trying to make dinner, Iââ
âHold on,â he interrupts, stopping you with a hand on your stomach that is so non-demanding itâs really mostly a suggestion. He tries to clear his head, though you make it hard. âYou didnât talk to me all day. Not that you have to, but⌠I was worried.â
You glance at the floor and mumble, âI lost my phone,â with so much embarrassment he believes youâre telling the truth. âDid you, umâdid you text me?â
Insecurity. Spencer knows well what it looks like on you. He softens. You werenât ignoring himâbut youâd been left in a vulnerable state without any ability to contact him or anyone. That couldnât have been comfortable.Â
âOf course I did.â He pauses to observe you. Still anxious. Still prepared to run at any second. Something, and heâs not sure what, did a number on you today. Maybe itâs sheer exhaustion, maybe it was the anxiety of not having your phone. But he has to figure out what it is so he can undo it. âWhat? Whatâs wrong?â
He watches your breathing pauseâwatches your eyes gloss over with tears and a frown contort your features. Oh, god. Heâs done something terribly wrong. Itâs been thirty seconds and heâs done something wrong.Â
âCan we sit down? I donât feel very good.â
âYeah. Yeah, we can. Whatever you need.â
You cast a baleful look at him and now he has to wonder what that means. Spencer sets his bag on a pulled out dining chair and follows you to the couch where you settle on opposite sidesâyouâre curled up in the far corner, hugging a pillow to your chest with your legs folded in front of you. Spencerâs heart is beating fast. He doesnât know whatâs going on with you and he canât figure it out just by looking and you donât seem eager to tell him.Â
Heâs exhausted all his typical ways of collecting information, and now heâs at a loss.Â
Eventually, the anxiety comes bubbling up.Â
âPlease talk to me,â he pleads. And you do. Almost instantly, like he stepped on some sort of landmine.Â
âI know itâs my own fault for not having my phone on me and not being able to see your texts, but it really sucks that I had to find out from my creepy neighbor that you snuck out in the middle of the night without saying goodbye.â
The whiplash is so strong itâs almost a broken neck. Spencer reels, frowning deeply as he tries to process your impromptu speech, the sudden confrontation. What creepy neighbor?
âIâŚÂ didnât. I went to grab my stuff from the car around one, but I came right back. I left at 7:30. You donât remember me saying goodbye?â
Your brow furrows, and your eyes dart over the design on the rug like youâre watching memories go by. He sees it in your eyes when you recall some hazy image of him holding your face, kissing your cheek more times than was necessary and whispering sweet things against your lips before he had to go. You shrink into the couch, clearly struggling under the combined weight of relief and embarrassment.Â
âI forgot. I thought⌠he saidâŚâ
A moment passes and itâs clear youâve abandoned the sentence. Spencer is concerned about this shadowy male figure who put malicious untruths into your head. He slides his hand under yours and twines your fingers together. Finally, finally you meet his gaze.Â
âSomeone made you believe I left without saying goodbye.â
And he almost wishes you werenât looking at him as more tears pool before falling down your cheeks. You nod, and donât make a sound.Â
âNo, honey. I didnât do that. Iâm sorry thatâs what youâve been thinking all day.â
âI was worried that you⌠or that I wasnâtâŚâ
His chest aches. Youâd woken up alone, no recollection of his goodbye, and without the comfort of even a text.Â
âYou didnât see my note?â
The way you look at him then is heartbreaking. Eyes wide and wet and sad, lip trembling.Â
âYou left a note?â
Murphyâs Law. Anything that can go wrong, will.Â
It mustâve fallen off the bedside table, or maybe he just hadnât positioned it obviously enough.Â
A lost phone, a missed note, and not even a memory of his departure. While none of these things are verifiably Spencerâs fault, he feels so, so guilty.Â
âI did,â Spencer says gently, scooting closer and pulling you into him, head pressed to his shoulder as you try not to cry, and he rubs your back slowly.Â
Your sulky words are muffled by his shirt. âI didnât see it. What did it say?â
âA lot of very nice things about you,â he whispers. Spencer thought maybe he could get away with giving you all the sincere compliments you canât accept face to face through a note you could read while he wasnât around. That way you couldnât refute them or stop him. It was a good plan.Â
He feels the sigh of relief leaving your body against his neck.Â
âI didnât know.â
âI know. Iâm sorry. Thatâs not⌠I shouldâve just stayed. This is my fault.â
You keep your cheek pressed to his shoulder as you speak.Â
âItâs not. You have a job. A really important job. You canât just call out whenever I want you around.â
Logically he knows youâre right, but he doesnât always think logically around you.Â
âI couldâve made it work. I couldâve come in late, or the team couldâve called me if there was a case, which there wasnâtââ
âSpencer, itâs okay. Itâs not your fault. Donât worry about it.â
He pulls back slightly, frowning at your tone. You do look relieved, much less plagued than youâd been when he arrived minutes ago, but something heavy still weighs you down. The burden of it darkens your eyes and dulls your expression. When he cups your cheek, you glance up at him, and then away once more.Â
He speaks softly. âIs that all you wanted to tell me?âÂ
Again he earns a moment of your eye contact, but itâs fleeting. He watches the words spin around your head as you try to figure out what to do with themâand then choose to remain silent.Â
There is in fact something youâre keeping from him.Â
Spencer hates to use work tactics on you, but he doesnât speak either, hoping that youâll feel compelled to fill the silence with the truth. Knowing how youâre not entirely comfortable with quiet.Â
And you try, lips parting and the sound delayed as you wrestle with something you clearly donât know how to talk about.Â
âI⌠my neighbor,â you say, frowning like you donât quite know why youâre speaking. âThe one who told me he saw you leaving in the middle of the night. He alsoâhe saidâŚâ
Spencer brushes hair away from your cheek with a thumb, stroking the high point in gentle passes as your words taper off. Now that heâs thinking about it, he did encounter a man in a dumpy robe standing in the courtyard and smoking a cigarette when he left you tangled in sheets and dozing contentedly to get his bag from the car. In fact, they rode back up to your floor in the elevator in mostly awkward silence. Spencer was sure his outfit told a storyâshirt untucked and hastily buttoned only partway, no belt, shoes barely tied, duffel slung over his shoulderâhe wasnât really expecting to run into anyone at such an hour, to be honest, but he hadnât particularly cared what this man thought of him, so it didnât cross his mind again.
Now he remembers.Â
Long night, huh? I remember those days.Â
It was an inappropriate comment, but given his job heâs used to ignoring those. Mostly his mind had been preoccupied with the idea of returning to you, who gave him such a warm and sleepy welcome when he climbed carefully back into your arms several minutes later that it was like heâd never known anyone else at all.Â
Now he resents that he hadnât said anything, he hates the idea that you spoke to this man and he said something to upset you and Spencer wasnât there. Usually he tries not a judge a book by its cover (metaphorically, of course) but heâs been around enough bad men to know when heâs looking at one. Last night he hadnât even been cognizant enough to realize they got off on the same floor.Â
âWhat did he say, angel?â Spencer whispers, incapable of being anything but soft with you at the moment. Even though he senses something a lot like a tide of preemptive anger rising in his chest, painted over with layers of anxiety and guilt. He shouldâve found a way to stay with you this morning.Â
You sniffle and let your head fall again, forehead resting against his collar. Instinctively his hand slides to the back of your neck and even at the awkward angle he finds a way to press his lips to yours hair. âCan we talk about it later? I donât feel good.â
If itâs making you this uncomfortable, Spencer really wants to know what passed between you and this neighbor. In fact, heâd be willing to bet a lot of your strange behavior this evening stems from something that occurred which you donât feel comfortable telling him yet. But he manages to bite back anymore questions. He doesnât want to make you feel interrogated.Â
âYeah, you mentioned that,â he says eventually, kindly, hand tracing down the length of your back and up again. âWhy donât you feel good?â
He doesnât miss the way you reach up to discreetly wipe your cheek. But he wonât make you talk about anything you donât want to talk about until youâre ready, and it seems like youâre already having a rough day. Which is not what he wanted. This is so far from what he wanted for you. Heâs cursing himself for how he handled this whole situation.Â
âUm, I just⌠I donât know. I feel⌠bad. Iâm sorry Iâm being so weird.â
âYouâre not being weird, honey. You had a hard day. Youâre having a normal reaction to an abnormal set of circumstances.â
You sit up, sniffing and wiping your tears like you can just make the whole thing go away.Â
âNo, I am. I am. Itâs all okay now, right? So I donât know why I feel like this. I donât know whatâs wrong with me.â
He watches helplessly. âNothing is wrong with you. Weâve⌠itâs been a big couple of days. Mostly good, but I think youâre probably really tired. Emotionally and physically.âÂ
You bury your face in your hands and nod silently. He still feels like heâs shooting in the dark, but youâre not entirely comforted yet, and itâs killing him.Â
âWhatever youâre feeling is okay. If this is⌠about last night, or this morning, or something entirely differentâregardless of what itâs about, youâre not going to be⌠in trouble with me if youâre having complicated feelings. And you can talk to me. But it doesnât have to be right now. We donât have to figure it out all at once, okay?â
You press the heels of your palms into your eyes, and for a moment, his words sink into silence. When you do raise your head, nodding, the evidence of your discomfort is all over your faceâreddened eyes, cheeks polished with wiped tears. But you take a deep breath and try to project whatever it is you think he wants to see.Â
The back of your hand is soft under his thumb as he sweeps it, as if he could draw forth more information that way. People speak when theyâre ready.
âIs there anything I can do?â He tries, all ramped brow and soft spoken.Â
Youâre looking at where heâs tracing swirls on your hand as you swallow and blink the last of your tears away.Â
âUm⌠you can say no, butâdo you think it would be okay for you to maybe stay again tonight?â
Spencer sucks in a breath, painfully aware that heâs about to let you down.Â
âI⌠I havenât been home in a week. Iâve been wearing this suit for two days straight and I donât think I would want to share a bed with me again until I shower.â He watches you wilt and lifts a hand to stroke your hair. âBut I do want to spend time with you⌠do you maybe want to come stay with me instead? No pressureââ
âOkay. Yes. Is that okay?â
Spencerâs brow knits. You seem even more enthused about the idea of going to his apartment, like now that the opportunity has presented itself you canât wait to get out. Maybe you have some sort of black mold problem.Â
âOf course. Do you wanna grab a few things and then we can go?â
âUmâI also havenât showered today. Do you mind waiting?â
âSure. Or you could use mine. With supervision, this time.â
Spencer is attempting to make a joke about your unplanned (and unmoderated) stay at his apartment last week after he leftâbut looking at your face now heâs wondering if he touched a nerve.Â
âLike⌠one at a time? OrâŚâ
He thought maybe youâd be more comfortable around him after last nightâand itâs not like he hadnât seen you naked before then, either.
âDo you wanna do it one at a time?â He asks gently.Â
Thereâs this sparkly sort of longing in your eyes that heâs seen before, but you tamp it down like always. Youâre so cautious. About everything. Even the things youâre curious about. Itâs sweet and a little sad.Â
âIâve never⌠showered with anyone.â
The corner of Spencerâs mouth twitches as he pushes hair over your shoulder. âI know. You donât have to. We could save like 100 gallons of water depending on how long your showers typically last, butââ
âSpencerââ
âSorry, sorryâI didnâtâI didnât mean it like that. Iâm not trying to pressure you. You absolutely can take your own shower. You can go first so you get the hot water.â
âNo,â you laugh, and itâs like a sparkling cloud of gold has settled around you, fractals bouncing off the shine of your cheeks and eyesâthe sound of your laughter, the look of it, is such beautiful relief he canât believe how good it feels, but it fades from you quickly. âIt sounds⌠I think I want to, I just⌠I donât wanna, likeâŚÂ do⌠anything.â
For a split second your veiled language mystifies him and then he realizes what youâre trying to say without saying. Something has changed since yesterday, when you brazenly referred to it as fucking, and today, when you canât even say sex. Heâs gotten as far as it being something your creepy neighbor said. Maybe. He needs to know what.Â
But thatâs not the topic at hand.Â
âWe donât have to. I didnât mean to imply that we would do anything like that. I donât expect anything from you.â
You swallow.Â
âOkay. I wasnât sure.â
About what?
He says your name. No response.Â
âCan you look at me, please?â
It takes you a moment, and your head raises like you might need some oil in your hinges, but eventually you manage. Spencer hopes the way heâs rubbing your leg is comforting.Â
âYou know Iâm never, ever going to make you do anything you donât want to do, right?â
To his horror, your answer isnât an immediate and resounding yes. Instead you look back down and cover his hand with your own, fiddling nervously with his fingers.Â
Eventually, you reply, âYeah⌠I know. I just thought⌠Iâm not sure. Maybe itâs supposed to be different now.â
âIt doesnât have to be. Nothing has to be different. Weâre still doing everything on your schedule, okay? And as for the next few days, at leastâI think it might be a good idea to take sex off the table altogether.â
Your eyes narrow and you hesitate. âWhy?â
âBecause I donât want you worrying about it. And I donât think it would feel good for you right now. I think there are things we need to talk about, but⌠weâve probably tried enough for a while, hm?â
You give him a shy nod and hum your agreement. For a moment he lets his hand linger on your leg and then pulls it back.Â
âOkay. Do you want my help packing a bag, or should I wait out here?â
âYou can wait. It should only take a minute.â You pause, halfway up to look pensive. âUm, Spencerâdo you think it would be okay if maybe I⌠if I stayed tonight and tomorrow? I justâI wanna get out of here, for a bit.â
He frowns but doesnât hesitate. âOf course. Can I ask why?â
âItâs justâŚÂ suffocating sometimes,â you call as you turn and hurry down the hallway to the bedroom. âFeels like my neighbors are on top of me, like theyâre⌠breathing down my neck, half the time.â
Sure, bigger apartments existâbut itâs not like youâre in a studio. And youâve never mentioned feeling that way before. That bad feeling is starting to come backâlike youâre not telling him something he needs to know. But is it worse to let you deal with it yourself until youâre ready to talk or to force it from you?
A few minutes later you return, a duffel of your own over your shoulder and full to bursting.Â
âSo Iâm an idiot. My phone was literally in the pocket of my jeans on the floor.â You drop the bag as you bend down by the door to pull on your favorite slippers. âOhâI think I forgot my charger, can you grab it? Itâs by my bed.â
Spencer of course obliges, and is secretly pleased to be in your room again, in the light this time, so he can see better. Itâs sweet. The pictures on the walls, the plants and the knickknacks and the sticky notes scrawled with messy reminders on every surface and the sweater hanging over the back of a chairâthe one youâd been wearing at the cafe all those months agoâit all feels so you. He wonders why the two of you donât spend more time here.Â
He lets himself linger for only a minute before remembering his task, but as he reaches down to unplug your charger, whatever dopey smile heâd been wearing evaporates. The sheets have been stripped from your bed, and he can see whyâthereâs a striking stain of dried blood, and several surrounding dots, soaked into the mattress. Not much, but enough to make him feel horrendously guilty. He cringes, imagining what it mustâve been like to wake up all alone to nothing but your own blood. Poor girl. Of course heâd noticed some, last night when he was doing his best at cleaning you up, but it had been dark, and he was exhausted, and he hadnât done enough.Â
âWhereâd your sheets go, baby?â He asks once back by the front door with his own bag on his shoulder, setting a gentle hand on your lower back and holding out your charger for you. You jump slightly, and he makes circles on your back, wishing there was something he could do to settle you.Â
âOh! Theyâthey got ruined. I threw them out. Itâs fine. I have others.â
So you didnât have enough energy this morning to walk a few feet to your shower, but stripping your bed, getting dressed, and walking down to the trash chute at the end of the hall had been top of your priority list.Â
You swallow as he undoes the locks and holds the door open for you, and pretend like youâre not doing surveillance to either side as you stand in the hallway, locking your door again like you canât get out of here fast enough.Â
Spencer casts a sidelong glance at you and wonders if youâre intentionally avoiding eye contact. He tries not to think like a profiler. He tries not to assign meaning to your actions, but he canât help it. He canât not notice.Â
He canât not worry.Â
And he canât not wonder what youâre not telling him.Â
-
part nine
#spencer reid fanfiction#spencer reid fanfic#spencer reid fic#spencer reid smut#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x fem!reader#spencer reid x you#spencer reid#spencer reid fluff#spencer reid angst#criminal minds x reader#criminal minds fic#criminal minds smut#criminal minds imagine#criminal minds fanfic
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NOBODYâS BUSINESS âš luke castellan
part one
( summary ) social media au where lukeâs sudden spike in confidence turns a few heads, including the head of your ex who just loves to jump in other peopleâs business
( pairing ) luke castellan x fem aphrodite counsellor!reader , mentions of ex bf! hephaestus camper x reader
( notes ) this feels a bit rushed bcs iâm sick rn but i hope you guys enjoy anyway!!
⍠American Teenager by Ethel Cain
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⥠liked by maxwalsh , silenabeauregard , and others
yourusername proof that percy doesnât actually hate luke
seaweedbrain hey girlie!!! can you take this down like immediately?? not to sound to mean or anything but i can and will find you đ
yourusername youâre such a cutie perce
seaweedbrain kys
sarahdawson totally wasnât held at gunpoint for that last pic guys no need to worry
connorstroll we werenât worrying but thanks anyway ig
sarahdawson sleep with one eye open.
lukecastellan 2/10 post
yourusername sorry for messing with your tough guy image đ
lukecastellan actually it only loses points bcs thereâs no pics of you
chrisrodriguez WOAHHHHHHH
sarahdawson HIS BALLS FINALLY DROPPED
clarisselarue bit sad to know they werenât completely crushed after the red team kicked their ass icl
yourusername oh trust they were all whining about it the second i put away the camera
clarisselarue good.
GROUPCHAT â chbâs finest
clarisselarue: y/n what is max doing in your likesâŚ
sarahdawson: HES WHAT
sarahdawson: oh heâs brave
yourusername: IDK HE JUST APPEARED
yourusername: like a bug
seaweedbrain: or a rat
yourusername: that too
lukecastellan: heâs on his way for training with me rn so iâll go extra hard on him
silenabeauregard: homoerotic subtext goes crazy
yourusername: thanks luke but really you donât need to do that
yourusername: like iâm over him now and i just want to forget about him altogether
lukecastellan: he deserves a hard time for what he did to you anyway
lukecastellan: you deserve way better than that
lukecastellan: i mean anyone would
seaweedbrain: great save bro
lukecastellan removed seaweedbrain.
sarahdawson: oh you took that one personally
DIRECT MESSAGES
clarisselarue: ok when did you get game
lukecastellan: idk what youâre talking about
clarisselarue: oh please spare me iâve had to watch you make googoo eyes for the past two years you canât lie youâre way out of this one
lukecastellan: seriously idk what youâre talking about clarisse
clairsselarue: ok fine whatever but HYPOTHETICALLY if you were to try anything with my girl i want you to know that i approve but trust if you go a toe out of line then you will be dealt with
read.
⍠My Love Mine All Mine by Mitski
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⥠liked by drewtanaka, hazellevesque , and others
[ tagged: sarahdawson ]
yourusername youâre the only thing iâll ever thank a man for
yourusername thanks max
this comment was deleted.
sarahdawson I SAW THAT COMMENT GIRL THAT WAS BRAVE
drewtanaka surprised sar isnât screaming for photo creds for the second slide
sarahdawson bcs i didnât take itâŚâŚ..
silenabeauregard WOAH WHAT
pipermclean yourusername hey sis can we have a chat please
yourusername nope iâm doing cabin checks rn #counsellorissues
wisegirll iâm doing cabin checks rn though???
silenabeauregard the plot thickens
lukecastellan glad to see you listened to my advice
yourusername felt bad keeping my beauty from everyone
lukecastellan it was a rough time without it
groverunderwood chrisrodriguez now THESE are moves
chrisrodriguez LOOK AT MY BOY GO gods is this what normal parents feel when their kids go to college
maxwalsh nice earrings
this comment was deleted.
seaweedbrain we all saw that comment rightâŚ
clarisselarue yes.
DIRECT MESSAGES
maxwalsh: hey can we please talk
yourusername: no
maxwalsh: please babe cmon you didnât even hear me out
yourusername: because you tried to kiss sarah you fucking asshole
maxwalsh: no it wasnât like that you donât get it
maxwalsh: look can you just meet me by our old spot and i can explain everything
yourusername: no
maxwalsh: babe youâre not acting like yourself
yourusername: bcs itâs not her, sheâs asleep rn and sheâs not your âbabeâ
maxwalsh: who tf is this???
yourusername: doesnât matter
yourusername blocked maxwalsh.
lukecastellan posted to their story!
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SARAHDAWSON replied to your story
sarahdawson: WOAHWOAHWOAHWOAH SLOW YOUR ROLL WHAT
CLAIRSSELARUE replied to your story
clairsselarue: âidk what youâre talking abt clarisseâ oh i hate you so bad
SILENABEAUREGARD replied to your story
silenabeauregard: iâd know that silhouette anywhereâŚ
CHRISRODRIGUEZ replied to your story
chrisrodriguez: iâm a bit hurt i wasnât told in depth about this before but iâm too proud to pay attention to it GOOD FOR YOU MAN
MAXWALSH replied to your story
maxwalsh: so it was you who had her phone the other day
maxwalsh: wtf man
lukecastellan: womp womp
lukecastellan: you snooze you lose and you lost big time
⍠Nobodyâs Business by Rihanna, Chris Brown
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⥠liked by jasongrace , racheledare , and others
[ tagged: yourusername ]
lukecastellan and it ainât what??
yourusername AND IT AINâT NOBODYâS BUSINESS
clarisselarue ok edward cullen why are you eating her neck like that
silenabeauregard everyone i took the hammock pic thank me please đđ
yourusername thank you beautiful angel
seaweedbrain cute i guessâŚâŚ.
chrisrodriguez I ALWAYS HAD FAITH IN YOU BRO EVEN WHEN EVERYONE ELSE THOUGHT YOU WERE A LOSER WITH NO GAME, I STAYED ROOTING FOR YOU
lukecastellan appreciate you bro
lukecastellan wait people said that about me???
wisegirll my favs đđŤś
yourusername AWE ILY ANNIE
seaweedbrain oh iâm just dirt to you then? chill.
wisegirll youâre so dramatic percy
seaweedbrain oh so mental health matters until IâM the one hurt? cool.
lukecastellan and yâall were saying i had no game
seaweedbrain okay luke see thatâs just not funny because your dad literally dances on a revolving stage for a living
lukecastellan had to bring out the dad jokes because you know iâm right?
seaweedbrain why is your old age pension ass beefing with me instead of talking to ur girlfriend⌠weird behaviour
sarahdawson too cute i fear
sarahdawson but you i must remind you mr castellan, i made it onto her feed first. you will ALWAYS be second to me. always.
drewtanaka anyone else hear weeping from the hephaestus cabinâŚ
leovaldez itâs really depressing
leovaldez i think he just punched a hole in the wall
cbeckendorf he did
pipermclean LMAO WHAT A FUCKING LOSER đđâ ď¸â ď¸
( taglist ) @perseus-jackass @harrysnovia
#charlie bushnell x reader#luke castellan x aphrodite!reader#luke castellan x you#luke castellan x reader#luke castellan#percy jackson and the olympians x reader#percy jackson x reader#percy jackon and the olympians#pjo x reader
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34.6037° S, 58.3816° W | jww
(your latest assignment has you jetting off to argentina hoping to finally catch the infamous art thief that's escaped your agency one too many times already. you know what's at stake if you lose your focus. enter the beautiful stranger that has you questioning everything you know.)
pairing: jeon wonwoo x f.reader genre: strangers to lovers, (kinda, v light) enemies to lovers | smut, fluff, angst rating: explicit, minors DNI word count: ~22.8k (idk what happened) warnings: art thief!wonwoo, secret agent!reader, brief mentions of death & bloody past (again, reader is a secret agent), mentions of past violence, mentions of weapons, food, drinking, VERY ambiguous ending smut warnings: multiple smut scenes, multiple positions, unprotected sex (don't do this), slightly rough sex, mild dom!wonwoo?, fingering, oral sex, choking, spanking, multiple orgasms, squirting, light marking, semi-public sex, food play (whipped cream, chocolate), i think that's it
a/n: this is for @svthub's world tour collab (check out the other fics here). i had so much fun writing this even if it got away from me a bit. thanks to @effortandmore for lending me her art brain. thanks to @highvern for constantly listening to me and @multi-kpop-fanfics for fit inspo. and as always, thank you to my bby @wongyuseokie for the banner & divider.
edited to add: i am considering an epilogue if thatâs something anyone is interested in
tag list: @wonustars, @minisugakoobies, @crepecakeu, @tinyelfperson, @dokyeomkyeom, @amoryeonjun, @miriamxsworld, @hongrizoon, @gyuminusone, @aaniag, @naajaeminsgf, @straykidswhoo789, @kimseokgen, @beomesbabe, @haolistic, @vanishingboots, @babybae-shisui, @pyeonghongrie-main, @nuttywastelandmentality, @writingbarnes, @tomodachiii, @gyuhao365, @jjin-kun, @sdoulc, @wonwootakemyheart, @divinityyyy, @nightshadeinmoonlight, @imma-queencard, @jelly-n
âWeâll be landing in about 45 minutes, according to the pilot,â a voice says, interrupting your laser-like focus.
You look up from your tablet and blink at him for a second. It takes you a moment or two to register heâs even standing there. Another moment to register what he actually said to you a second ago. In the meantime, you switch the program open on your tablet.
âOh, thanks,â you say in response.Â
He sits down in the seat opposite you and fixes you with a smile. âMust be a good book, youâve barely looked up for the entire flight.âÂ
âGuilty,â you say with a practiced smile.Â
Chan, you think thatâs his name, seems nice enough. A little overeager and too ready to agree to something when his bosses tell him what to do. Thereâs that real thirst to prove himself. But, at least from what you hear, heâs got a bright future. Heâs done well with what heâs been given so far, which are increasingly difficult assignments. You can see why. Heâs easy on the eyes and heâs got that soft smile down. The kind of unassuming smile that makes people want to trust him. If he can keep it up, heâll go far.Â
âThanks again for letting me catch a ride,â you say to fill some of the space between you.Â
Chan only shrugs. âAny friend of Mr. Choiâs is always welcome. Plus, nobody really says no when the boss says something.â
A lesser person would have probably laughed at that. Hearing him referred to as Mr. Choi and the boss is a little comical to you. Not that it isnât true because he is definitely Chanâs boss. Itâs just, well, itâs a little more complicated than that.Â
âHonestly I donât really even understand what Cheol does,â you lie and turn on a little bit of the charm. Itâs always good to practice on people that are trained to be charming themselves.Â
âDo you call him that?â Chan wonders.
âCall him what? Cheol?â you ask and Chan nods, eyes a little wide. It catches him just off guard enough. âYeah, but Iâve known him for years. What do you call him?â
âSir, usually,â Chan answers too quickly. You canât fully fight the smile that answer brings to your lips. âGlad to see I entertained you.âÂ
âHeâs not nearly as bad as Iâm sure he seems at work,â you say like youâre sharing a secret.
The truth is that youâve been hearing about this new agent that Seungcheol is personally training for over a year now. So, you know that eventually, youâre going to all be laughing at this conversation in hindsight and heâll also be calling his boss Cheol. For now, though, things are a little bit different.Â
âHe mentioned that you were heading down to do some research?â he asks and you nod.Â
This part has always been a little tedious to you, the part where you come up with a cover story that you even have to feed to other people within the same organization. Itâs been this way for your entire career. You were recruited at 18 years old and went through special training along with obtaining a degree. The Agency had two divisions, but you only ever learned about the second one if you were recruited to work there. It was that second division you joined right away.Â
Training had been grueling. If it wasnât some kind of physical endurance training, it was sitting in a windowless room studying history or a foreign language. Or it was combat training with whatever weapon was on deck that day. Or working to blend into any situation. You quickly learned that did not mean not being memorable. At least not in every situation. Sometimes that meant looking at ease in your surroundings even if eyes were on you. Thankfully, the charm seemed to come naturally to you and that was one less thing you had to worry about learning.Â
The Agency officially works in maintaining international relationships between countries. That can mean a number of different things. Sometimes it involves an agent or team heading out to a location as official representatives. They can help with negotiation, security concerns, smoothing out issues, anything really. Unofficially, it often involves going undercover on a mission. That can involve either division, depending on the sensitivity of the mission. If itâs simpler, then someone like Chan gets sent out to work his way into a situation and influence the outcome so that everything stays calm. In fact, heâs here to charm a wealthy heiress thatâs getting a little too close to revealing confidential information on government contracts.Â
You, on the other hand, are officially here to study Argentinian culture and immerse yourself in local traditions. Chan doesnât know that you work for The Agency as well. He doesnât know that Seungcheol is like a boss to you. Itâs not his preference. Seungcheol misses the days when he was by your side in the field instead of stuck in the office behind a desk. Unfortunately, several years ago he suffered a severe injury that just made field work impossible for him. It took a lot of convincing, most of which fell on your shoulders as the person closest to him, to get him to transition to his current role. Where you had never set foot in the main offices, he had been there periodically. He was known to people there. And he was so insanely smart that you pointed out he would be bored trying to assimilate into regular life. Why not get to do one of his other favorite things and tell younger agents (or even older ones) what to do? That had been the biggest selling point because he was good at being in charge. It had been a bit of a rocky transition at first, but now itâs smooth sailing.Â
Unofficially, youâre here tracking one of the most infamous art thieves in the world. This is the kind of thing that has to be handled with the utmost secrecy. Other agencies and your own have tried to track him down and apprehend him only to have him slip into the wind. If you had to hazard a guess, youâd assume that there had been leaks during the previous attempts. Youâve also considered that heâs just really good at making a mark and blending into his surroundings. This is one of the most secretive missions youâve ever been sent on despite seeming relatively innocuous. How much harm can an art thief really cause, right? Except, The Agency is largely funded by private investors and several of those investors have been victims and had art stolen. Despite that, the only people that know youâre making this attempt now are Seungcheol and the head of covert operations. His counterpart doesnât know that youâre handling it, or even who you are. Instead, the main division of The Agency has a team headed to Amsterdam thinking that theyâre after the notorious thief.Â
Although it seems like it should be straight forward, this thief has been working in the shadows for years without anyone really knowing what he looks like beyond him being a man. The reports about what he actually looks like vary so greatly that nobody really knows what to believe. You and Seungcheol have spent months trying to put together a profile that seems most realistic and you feel as comfortable as you can. His appearance seems a little elusive, but the information that heâs going to be in Buenos Aires is the best lead youâve gotten. It comes from someone that you worked with on a previous mission. You had been studying your profiles when Chan came over and quickly exited to a different application.Â
âI am. Iâm working on understanding the history of Argentinian culture through the eyes of Buenos Aires for a project,â you say with all the affection of someone who was actually going to be doing that. âIâm going to spend most of my time just out talking to people, learning their stories, that kind of thing.â
âDo you, uh, speak Spanish?â Chan wonders with clear apprehension.Â
âI do,â you say with a light laugh. âBe a bit awkward if I didnât, right?âÂ
âThatâs impressive,â he says.Â
âI speak several languages,â you say nonchalantly and then make a show of catching his eye. âI studied language and culture in university.âÂ
âYouâre not what Iâd imagine for one of my bossâs friends,â Chan admits. âEspecially one close enough to get added to the manifest.âÂ
You shrug. âIâve known him for a long time.âÂ
âHe doesnât strike me as someone with a lot of time for friendships or someone that you can ever really know,â Chan presses and you laugh.
âMarried to the job, right?â you agree. âIâm a low maintenance friend. I spend a lot of time out of town for research, immersed in local culture. Weâve probably got more in common that youâd think.âÂ
âThat makes a lot of sense,â he concedes, seeming to easily buy your cover. He stands up. âIâll let you get back to your reading.â
The rest of the flight goes smoothly and you say your goodbyes to Chan and the others from the flight once you get off the plane. As is the plan, you take your suitcases to a local taxi and head to your hotel, checking in under one of the many fake names you used when on a mission. The room is nice, too, even if itâs nothing all that extravagant. Itâs just another part of the cover.Â
Since itâs been a long day, you figure that you might as well just order room service and settle in for the night. Itâll give you the chance to start getting your body used to the local timezone. Not that your body really has a home timezone anymore with how youâre constantly on the move. But, you still donât mind the idea of resting for the night.Â
Youâre incredibly thankful to be in Buenos Aires in July since itâs the coolest month. It makes it easier for you to just walk everywhere. Before leaving your room for your first full day in your new city, you double check your messenger bag to make sure everything is in there: camera, multiple lenses, journal, tablet and keyboard, sunglasses, wallet, and all your little bits to make it look like a bag you wear all the time. You smile at the receptionist on your way out, letting her know that youâre going off to explore what the city has to offer. She seems happy to see that you look better rested than after your long travel day. Even if heading out is mostly a cover for your mission, itâs also a little true. This city has been on your bucket list to visit for years and youâre not going to waste what might be your only opportunity to explore. It might even make it more believable as youâre trying to blend into the crowds around you.
After spending several hours wandering around and taking in everything you could, you find yourself at a local cafe in the early afternoon to have a cup of coffee and a light lunch. The whole morning flew by in a rush of colors and culture. Itâs so easy to be interested in everything thatâs before you because itâs just so vibrant. So full of life. Such a juxtaposition of history, tradition, and new influences. Itâs one of the first times youâve been somewhere and had to remind yourself that you are actually on a mission. Youâre not just there to sightsee and fall in love.Â
There are a lot of tourists in the cafe, which doesnât really surprise you. Most places in Buenos Aires stay open during the afternoon for tourism, but you know that cafes in smaller towns would close. You figure that most locals probably avoid shops during this time of day as well. It feels lucky when you spot an open table in the corner until another patron moves and you see thereâs actually someone sitting in one of the seats. Itâs an uncharacteristically awkward moment for you, especially given how confident you are with everything else, that he catches you mid-decision. His eyes meet yours before looking at the coffee in one hand and the plate in the other. When he looks back down at the table, it clicks into place before you can turn around.Â
âYou, uh, can sitâŚâ he starts with deliberate slowness that shouldnât be throwing you off even more.Â
You shake your head to clear it and smile. âItâs fine, I donât just speak Spanish.âÂ
âOh,â he says with a breath of relief. âWell, you can sit here.âÂ
âI donât want to intrude,â you say and go to turn around.
âItâs busy. Are you going to just eat standing up?â he asks with a challenging raise of his eyebrow.Â
âWell,â you start.
âI probably wonât be here much longer anyway,â he offers.
Reluctantly, you move to sit down with him. Itâs kind of insane the way heâs thrown you off your game by just existing. Usually, youâre the one thatâs disarming strangers with your charm, not the other way around. As soon as you sit down, he looks back at the book he has open in front of him. It gives you a chance to figure out if heâs actually that attractive that itâs thrown you off or if youâre still just jet-lagged.Â
His glasses slide down a nearly too perfect nose and he pushes them up without missing a beat. His black hair is a little messy and a little long, falling carelessly around his face as he gets lost in whatever book he has open in front of him. His clothes make him look a little too fancy to be sitting in a cafe overrun with tourists like this. Somehow, he makes a cardigan over a dress shirt with nice, pressed slacks work without looking like heâs trying too hard. Everything about him just exudes calm, confident energy. Like the kind of person you would assume comes from old money. Unassuming, yet standing out without even meaning to. It reminds you of some of the landmarks you saw that morning, like rich history perfectly combined with modern needs.Â
Thankfully, at least some of your training kicks back in and you manage to keep it from being too obvious that youâre one step away from fully checking him out. Your new tablemate seems content to sit in silence, though, so you pick at your food while going through some of the pictures on your camera. Today is about getting the lay of the land as much as anything else. Itâs not like you can just find your infamous art thief without knowing where to look.Â
âIâm sure you got some great shots,â he says, drawing your attention again. When you look up, his eyes are on your camera.Â
âOh, yeah, itâs so hard to really capture the feeling of something through a camera, but I definitely try,â you say.
âI saw you at The Obelisk and I thought, Iâve never seen someone so focused in my entire life,â he says, except now heâs looking at you.
âThere must have been thousands of people there. How did you pick me out?â you ask with a laugh.Â
The mystery man shrugs. âLike I said, you were focused. And not in the way a lot of influencers who travel for the perfect picture are. I knew that it was more than that for you.âÂ
âIt is,â you agree. âIâm studying the history and the culture down here. Just got in last night.âÂ
âCan I see the picture you landed on?â he ventures.Â
You hesitate. Your pictures are good, sure, but youâre not actually doing anything that serious when youâre down here. Since itâs supposed to be part of your cover, you should feel confident. After a moment, you hand your camera over to him with your favorite picture in the display window.Â
âBe kind. My focus is language and history first, not photography,â you toss out. Another layer to the cover. Itâs convenient, though. Not that you expected to be talking to someone like him about photography.
âThis is amazing,â he says and seems earnest. âCan I look through the rest?â
Again, you pretend to consider. This time itâs for the sake of the persona youâre committing to. Itâs not like thereâs anything on there from before today since itâs a fresh SD card.Â
âI promise to be kind,â he presses and you roll your eyes.
âFine,â you say and he smiles.Â
Itâs hard not to notice the amount of care he uses while handling your camera. Maybe he knows something about photography and realizes itâs an expensive model. Or maybe heâs just gentle with something that clearly means a lot to someone else. Itâs also easier to feel like you can appreciate things about him when his attention is somewhere else. Like he wonât notice the way your eyes map his features, noting the furrow in his brows or how smooth his skin is. Or the way his hair seems absolutely perfect without any product in it. None of it seems fair that he should just get to walk around looking like that.
âIâm surprised not to find a picture of myself on here,â he starts and it pulls you from your thoughts. Thereâs a moment where you wonder if heâs secretly self-centered, until you meet his eyes and see the glint there. âYou know, with how youâve been studying me.âÂ
âI appreciate beauty wherever I see it,â you answer, trying to channel more boldness than you feel.Â
âAre you saying Iâm beautiful?â he questions, entirely too at-ease.Â
âI donât think you need confirmation on that,â you scoff and look out the window. âBesides, it wasnât me that noticed you earlier.âÂ
âA shame for me,â he muses. âI appreciate beautiful things as well.â
He hands your camera back with his eyes locked on you. It makes your skin feel a little flushed and you hate it. Hate that youâre always able to keep your cool in any situation and still so completely disarmed by this man. Hate that itâs him that breaks the moment, too, when he looks down at the expensive watch on his wrist with a sigh.
âLate for something?â you venture.Â
âSomething like that,â he agrees and puts his book away in a bag you hadnât noticed. âIâm glad you sat down though.âÂ
âMe too,â you admit a little too quickly as heâs standing up.
âEnjoy your afternoon, beautiful stranger,â he says and you twist around.
âWait, I didnât get your name,â you call and he stops by the door. The smile he throws your way sends a tingle down your spine.
âI hope weâll run into each other again, then,â he says.
And just like that, heâs gone. Slips into the crowd like he wasnât even there in the first place. It makes you wonder, just for a second, if the entire exchange actually happened. Until you look back at the table and see the cup of coffee he had been drinking. Beside it, you notice a small piece of paper advertising a new installation at one of the local art museums. Not entirely out of the question, you think, for someone visiting this city and also interested in seeing your camera.
Itâs then that you remind yourself why youâre actually here. You shake your head to clear it of any thoughts of the stranger, knowing you canât make any effort to run into him again. The mission is the only thing that matters. Getting close to someone that could distract you in that way is not part of the plan. So, you can appreciate the banter and get back on track.
The next few days pass relatively uneventfully. You continue to explore the city while always keeping your eyes and ears open for any indication of the art thief. Itâs a little frustrating to not have much to go on, but youâre also one of the most patient agents and you know itâll pay off eventually. Seungcheol keeps in regular contact, sending along each new nugget of information heâs able to find. Even if theyâre seemingly insignificant, you file them all away, appreciating how hard you know heâs working given how few people know about the mission. He has to pull the relevant pieces to send to you without tipping off the team in Amsterdam.Â
Youâre also splitting your days. Making sure to get out to experience the local culture to maintain your cover, while spending just as much time locked away in your room so that you can do your own research. Everything points to him already being in the city as well. It also seems like this next heist might be two-fold for him. It appears that heâs got a client that wants a specific piece of art and that heâs also going to steal some pieces for himself to sell at later dates. Itâs a bit unusual, from what youâve been able to tell. He usually likes to keep each job simple to reduce the likelihood of getting caught. Then again, heâs been active for years and doing just fine.Â
Today you decide to go to check out a museum that youâve been putting off. Itâs silly, but you didnât want to show up there the day after that cafe since it seemed a little convenient to leave behind. You have to familiarize yourself with all the museums in the city, though, and it seems like this one could be your thiefâs target. It has just the right amount of traffic. Just the right combination of popular pieces with lesser known artists.Â
Once youâre there, you immediately move away from the popular sections. Thatâs not the kind of art youâre after because itâs not the kind of art the thief ever steals. Itâs too recognizable. Too hard to move. Just too risky. Once youâre in a quieter part of the museum, you fight off any feelings of being a fraud. Art has never really been your strong suit. If it werenât for this mission being so sensitive, you definitely would not be the first agent anyone would choose. But, it is sensitive and so you have to rely on your training to carry you through any conversations that might pop up. You have to rely on the hours spent pouring over lectures about the different styles and influences, the different periods, different techniques. Hopefully your talent at rote memorization will serve you well.Â
âItâs a shame they keep one of the best artists tucked away in a corner like this,â a voice says from your side, pulling you from your thoughts.Â
You answer without even thinking much about the voice or even turning to see the person who appeared next to you nearly soundlessly. âMakes it easier to appreciate in peace, though.âÂ
âYou like surrealism, then?â he asks and itâs only then that you notice something familiar about the voice or the manner of speaking. Or the fact that heâs not speaking to you in Spanish.Â
Before you even turn to your side, you know who youâre going to find. Heâs looking just as put together and at-ease as he did several days ago in the cafe. His hands rest in his pockets, but his eyes on you are sharp. Thereâs something a little hard to read about him, you think.Â
The smile you give him is practiced, designed to seem genuine. âI like Leonor Fini.âÂ
âYouâve got good taste,â he says and turns back to the piece.Â
âI do like surrealism,â you carry on, turning back to the piece yourself as well, âbut, with her work, I really appreciate the way she used female subjects through a female lens. Too many artistsâŚâ
You trail off, pretending youâre unsure if you should continue. He falls into the setup easily. âMen could only show female subjects through their own eyes, but women look different through the eyes of other women.âÂ
âExactly,â you say and smile at him before turning back to the painting again. âThereâs something so captivating about the work she did.âÂ
âI agree. Thatâs why this is my favorite piece here and in my favorite section of works,â he says confidently.Â
âYou already have a favorite?â you joke.
âWell, Iâve been here every day for the past several days,â he shares.
This makes you turn to him fully. âBecause you love this section and this work so much?âÂ
This mysterious man actually looks down like heâs embarrassed to admit whatever heâs about to tell you. Like heâs gotten shy for a moment. âI do, but I was actually hoping to run into you.âÂ
That catches you a bit off guard and it takes your brain a minute to remember, once again, youâre here on a mission. âIt would have been easier to run into me if you just asked for my number.âÂ
âKind of ruins this whole mysterious thing I have going on, though,â he shrugs.Â
You roll your eyes and extend your hand, giving him your fake name for the mission. His eyes sparkle for a second before he takes your hand.Â
âWonwoo,â he answers.
âNice to finally get your name,â you tease.
âI figured youâd come check out the museum when I left the card there at the cafe,â Wonwoo says.Â
âI knew that was on purpose,â you mumble.
âYet you didnât come until today,â he observes.
âI wasnât trying to make it easy on you,â you throw out quickly.
âOkay, time to switch tactics, then,â he says. âCan I take you to dinner tonight?âÂ
âIâm not sure, can you?â you ask.
âPlease let me take you to dinner,â he says.
Itâs a bad idea and you know it. Everything about him screams distraction. This isnât what youâre in Buenos Aires to do. Yet, thereâs something about him that has you curious. Thereâs also the fact that this museum seems to be the most likely target for the art thief and this man admitted heâs been here every day. A small part of your brain is sending up alarm signals to keep an eye on him. He doesnât seem like a secret art thief, but hasnât your training taught you how to hide in plain sight? Itâs entirely possible heâs doing the same.
Your brain goes into overdrive as it often does on missions. There are a million little details in the pages of your profile on the art thief. They come flooding back to you. The profile so thoughtfully pieced together by The Agency says heâs probably unassuming. The kind of man that fits into any situation in the same way as you do, like heâs not trying to fit in and it means he doesnât stand out as not belonging. The profile suggests that heâs confident. That he would appear calm. Most importantly, heâs the kind of person that would absolutely look at home in the midst of art. So, whether itâs a good idea or not, you know youâre going to say yes. He must see the answer in your eyes before you voice it because he smirks.Â
âWhat time?âÂ
Wonwoo offers to pick you up at your hotel, but you insist that youâll meet him at the restaurant. Itâs safer that way, after all, being a woman traveling alone. At least thatâs what you tell him. Not that anything about Wonwoo seems that threatening and youâre better equipped to handle yourself than most. You just donât need him anywhere near your room even with everything put away. After going back to get ready, you made time to pour over the information you have. The more you consider it, the more it seems plausible that he could be exactly who youâre looking for. Thereâs only one issue: he asked you out. Everything you have suggests that he made agents in the past and slipped into the wind. Youâre not cocky enough to think youâre too good to fall victim to the same fate. You keep your update to Seungcheol vague in case the lead doesnât pan out.Â
Surprisingly, Wonwoo picks a nice place off the beaten path for dinner. Itâs not overrun with tourists and itâs not too expensive. Like him, itâs unassuming but quietly impressive. You try not to let your heart skip a beat when you see him in a simple white dress shirt and black dress pants. He stands to pull your seat out for you and then settles back into his seat across from you. This is for the sake of the mission. Either heâs the person youâre looking for or youâll have enjoyed a free and tasty meal. Nothing more to it.Â
His Spanish, it turns out, isnât that great and so you help him through ordering since itâs definitely a place more for the locals. Or maybe itâs just an excuse to get your help. Youâre not really sure you mind either way. He makes suggestions about which wines he prefers, but ultimately lets you pick, insisting that he will take care of whatever you land on. Once you get through ordering and all the small talk, it gives you a chance to really get to know him.
âHave you been here before?â you ask.
âThis restaurant or this city?â he asks.
âEither,â you shrug.
âNo to both,â he answers. âClearly, my Spanish is a bit rusty. Iâm so lucky that I found someone whoâs so fluent.âÂ
âIâm not sure I believe you canât speak the language,â you muse.
âI can speak enough Spanish to get by, but itâs not that good,â he assures you.Â
âInteresting place to visit, then,â you observe.
âIâd miss out on a lot of beauty if I only went where I spoke the language fluently,â he retorts and you smile genuinely at that. Heâs right.Â
âLike the art in the museum?â you suggest.
âOr a charming stranger,â he counters. Youâre impressed. âI do like the art as well, though.âÂ
âWhat other beautiful places have you visited?â you ask.
âOh, I hardly think itâs that interesting,â he dismisses.
âHumor me,â you say.Â
Thereâs a moment where heâs careful in listing off places. Like heâs weighing something that you canât really place. He ends up listing some places that catch your attention. Each of them has some wonderful art museums and it piques your curiosity. You try to look just politely interested, commenting on how heâs lucky to be able to travel as extensively as he seems to. He plays it off with a vague comment about being fortunate with help from his family. Itâs the kind of thing that you know passes on a first date. Itâs not appropriate to mention money on a first date. So, that would be fine, if it didnât also make you curious about who this man really was. After all, your art thief being well connected through family would definitely make sense.
Throughout the rest of the dinner, you try to enjoy it. Not that itâs hard to do. Wonwoo is actually a lot of fun to be around. The conversation flows easily and youâre able to connect on a lot of shared interests. At least, interests that you pretend to have for the sake of this mission. But, it feels like he might also be pretending on some of his interests. Heâs just a little too calm and put together. A little too quick with his answers. A little too rehearsed with his comments. Maybe you wouldnât think twice if you werenât doing the same.Â
By the time you finish the main course, youâre pretty sure that you managed to stumble into a date with the exact person that youâre here looking for based on his stories. It may have been a guess before. It feels nearly for sure now. He mentions how you have to visit Japan when the cherry blossoms are blooming, which sounds stunning. He mentions Oktoberfest in Munich and how he barely remembers anything from that trip. Then there's the ice festival in China, Nordlysfestivalen in Norway, and a few other locations that sound beautiful. They also have one thing in common. Each place is also on your list for stolen art around the time of the events.Â
Once you finish dessert, youâre making a decision that you know you should really clear with someone else before making. Sure, youâre pretty sure that Wonwoo is the art thief. And yes, itâs true that keeping an eye on him is in your best interest. One way to do that is to continue with the date. Yet, youâre not stopping to check in with Seungcheol. Youâre not analyzing the pros and cons of doing this. After giving Seungcheol a vague update about a lead and promising youâll have more information later on, he should be the first person you call. Heâs not swept up in the atmosphere of a foreign city with a gorgeous stranger. No, you donât do any of that. Youâre just agreeing to go back to his room with him without a second thought. Heâs painfully hot and youâre incredibly attracted to him, which is wildly unprofessional. But, youâre not sure you care. At least for the night. You can figure it all out later.
Wonwoo is quietly confident without being cocky. His gaze is so penetrating that it feels like heâs undressing you without it being slimy. He can hold a conversation about seemingly anything, but heâs also just as interested in what you have to say. In fact, you have his attention the whole night, regardless of anything else going on. Itâs a little overwhelming to have someone so focused on you. But, when it feels a little overwhelming, he makes a perfectly timed, slightly sarcastic joke that makes you laugh harder than you should. The smile you wear all throughout the date is genuine. Youâre actually enjoying yourself so much that youâre not sure you want it to end. Life has never felt so simultaneously complicated and easy.
Wonwooâs lips are hot on yours as he cages you against the door of his hotel room. That intensity you saw all dinner reappears and you feel like you might burn under his touch. Heâs so in control. Youâre still not entirely sure how you wound up here, but youâre not really trying to think too hard about it. The fact that heâs almost definitely the art thief becomes an issue for future-you the second he kisses you like itâs your last day on Earth. Itâs not like he knows youâre tracking his movements and it isnât exactly a bad thing to keep a closer eye on him. Nor is it the first time youâve done something like this. It is the first time youâve done it without thought, though, and genuinely been interested in the man you let seduce you.
He has his body pressed against yours with his arms on either side of you so there really is nowhere to go. Itâs kind of hot and youâre not even pretending to be turned on. A definite bonus. Your hands quickly undo his belt so that you can pull the edges of his shirt out. The moment your hands make contact with his skin, he pulls away and hisses. Theyâre likely cold, not that you care. It gives you the chance to catch his lower lip between your teeth. You watch his eyes darken with lust as you run your hands up his back, scratching down lightly.Â
âJust who do you think is in control here, baby?â His voice is so low in your ear that it makes you swallow hard. Everything about the endearment sounds sarcastic and it shouldnât work, but youâre only human. Then he nips at your earlobe and you actually moan.Â
âWhat are you going to do about it?â you challenge. It feels like a lot of heat between you. If your head were clearer, you might consider that it feels like two people who know they shouldnât be fucking. Almost like heâs punishing you a little, which he might want to, given why youâre here.
âThatâs a dangerous question,â he warns you.Â
âAfraid I canât handle it?â you ask and watch the way it nearly breaks his composure. You press forward into him, pulling him down so his ear is by your mouth now. Barely raise your voice above a whisper. âIâm not that fragile. I can handle a little pain.âÂ
That seems to set him off. Youâre worried for a second when he pulls away, but that disappears as you watch his nimble fingers rapidly undoing the buttons on his shirt. He casts it aside and looks back at you.Â
âI want you stripped naked and on the bed,â he commands.Â
Youâre not typically in the habit of taking commands but something about him makes you want to listen. Even if you want to challenge him a little. He turns his back and you do strip down. Mostly. You climb onto the bed wearing only your panties, legs spread open and waiting for him. When he turns around, you miss the flare of his nostrils at your defiance looking at his muscles. For someone so unassuming, he was certainly in good shape.Â
âIs this your idea of naked?â he questions.
Itâs funny, since heâs still got his boxer briefs on, though they leave little to the imagination. You can already see that heâs getting hard from the lead up.Â
âI thought Iâd leave that honor for you,â you say, injecting as much innocence as you can muster into every word.
Wonwoo looks at you for another long second before climbing onto the bed and getting between your legs. He pushes them further open and you bite down on your lip.Â
âYou donât get to muffle those moans from me, sweetheart,â he teases, running a hand up the inside of your thigh.
âOr what?â you challenge again.
He raises an eyebrow at you and pulls his hand away from your thigh. Youâre about to whine when he brings it back in a sharp slap.Â
âShit,â you hiss.Â
âYou liked that, didnât you?â he asks. You nod with big eyes. âUse your words.â
âFuck, yes, I liked it,â you rush out the second his finger traces a light line up your clothed cunt.Â
âI can tell,â he snarks. âJust tell me if itâs too much.â
âIt wonât be,â you insist. He pulls his hand away and looks at you surprisingly soft for a second.
âTell me if it is,â he repeats.
âI will,â you promise.Â
âGood,â he says and hooks his fingers inside the band of your panties, pulling them down your legs and casting them aside in one motion. âThatâs better.âÂ
In another surprise, Wonwoo doesnât dive right into your cunt the way you expect him to given how frenzied everything has been so far. Instead, he trails kisses from your knee up your inner thigh. Pausing occasionally to nip into the skin before running his tongue over the mark to soothe it. Youâre writhing on the bed by the time his breath ghosts across your cunt. The chuckle is low and deep as you squirm when he moves to your other thigh. Youâre going to die before he even touches you.Â
âJesus fuck, Wonwoo, if you donât start eating me outâŚâ you start, a hand winding into his hair.
He pops up and glares at you. âYouâll what? Did you already forget whoâs in charge?âÂ
âIâllâŚâ you start, before cutting off with a sharp, âFUCK!â
Heâs still got his eyes on you when his thumb runs quickly through your folds to press against your clit. Thereâs barely any movement but it anchors you in place. âThatâs what I thought.âÂ
His kisses up your other thigh are much sloppier with a thumb still in place. It only makes you squirm more, searching for some kind of relief. When he finally gets to your lips, you expect heâs going to tease you again. Youâre wrong. Again. His tongue dives into your pussy while his other hand keeps you spread open. This man knows what heâs doing and itâs immediately more than youâre expecting. You canât stop your legs from snapping closed to box him in. That is, until he pulls his hands off you to spread your legs wide again, giving him the best access to you. Itâs clear that heâs in charge and he wants you to know it.Â
Itâs everything you can do not to thrash around, but Wonwoo seems to be ready to help there. Heâs got a hand on your stomach anchoring you down to the bed. Youâre not even sure how heâs got enough hands to move them along your body the way he seems to. Without warning, he moves his mouth up to pay attention to your clit. And he doesnât give you a break, sliding two fingers into you and immediately scissoring them open. He sets a brutal pace, curling his fingers to hit you where he seems to know you need him on some of the passes.Â
âFuck, Wonwoo, oh my god, fuck,â you scream out.
âYou gonna come for me, baby?â he sneers at you from between your legs.
âYes, fuck,â you moan. âYour fingers, oh my god.âÂ
âYouâre so fucking tight,â he groans.
In the next moment, youâre coming so hard you squirt over those amazing fingers of his. Your vision whites out around the edges and your toes are curling. Itâs all you can do to catch your breath as Wonwooâs fingers pump through the high.Â
âI donât remember the last time I came that hard,â you admit.
âWeâre not done yet,â he shares and the tone of his voice has you nearly clenching your legs together. âTurn over. Get on your hands and knees.âÂ
âSo bossy,â you say with a roll of your eyes. You turn over anyway, though, and put your ass in the air.Â
âThis is a really good fucking view,â he says. You feel the bed dip when he gets back in place after removing his boxers.Â
Wonwoo has one hand on your hip and the other is running up your back to press you down further. To help you get that perfect arch of your back. You wiggle your ass at him and are rewarded with a stinging smack. Your moan is muffled by the pillow, so you turn your head to the side. Already know he wants to hear you. When he smacks your other ass check, you nearly scream out.
âThatâs it, I want to hear you,â he encourages.Â
âPlease, Wonwoo, just fuck me already,â you beg.Â
âOne orgasm wasnât enough?â he asks and you can hear the cockiness in his voice. Bringing a ringing smack down on your ass again. You scream out at the sting.Â
âNo, I want you to split me open,â you whine. In any other situation you might be embarrassed by the admission, but not now. Not with him. Not when itâs so clearly turning him on.Â
âGreedy little thing,â he comments. His fingers press into your cunt again and you nearly yelp.Â
Thereâs no time to adjust when Wonwoo removes his fingers and immediately lines himself up at your entrance. With one snap of his hips, heâs fully inside you and youâre hissing. Heâs bigger than you were guessing, even with the outline in his boxers. And he doesnât give you a break as he starts fucking you hard. All you can hear is the sound of his skin slapping against yours and the mingled moans from both of you. Youâre sensitive from both the pace and the earlier orgasm. Your legs feel like they would collapse under you if they could.Â
As if the pace isnât enough, Wonwoo snakes an arm around you to reach for your clit, rubbing circles into it at the same pace as his thrusts. You can tell heâs nowhere near close, but youâre about to lose control again and youâre not sure how to stop it.
âFuck, Wonwoo, slower, Iâm going to - fuck!â you whine out.Â
âYou gonna come again? So soon, baby?â he taunts.Â
âI canât - fuck, please,â you beg. âIâm so close.âÂ
âI want you to make a mess of my dick the same way you made a mess of my fingers,â Wonwoo directs.Â
âBut you havenâtâŚâ you start and Wonwoo removes his hand from your clit. You cry out at the loss until his other hand grabs your hair to yank you back against his chest. When itâs clear youâre not going to move, his hand moves from your hair to your throat.
âI want you to come for me. Right now. Show me how good I feel inside that tight pussy,â he directs.
Itâs one of the most surprising reactions, the way your body immediately responds to him. Heâs got you coming just as hard as the first time and he doesnât give you a chance to second guess any of it. As the shocks rip through your body, you notice that Wonwoo does slow down his thrusts. Doesnât pull out of you, though. You collapse forward and arch your back again so itâs easier to meet Wonwooâs continued pace.
âYouâre so good at listening,â he praises.
âNot usually,â you mumble into the pillow through the haze.Â
âI must be special,â he says as he lazily fucks into you.
âJesus Wonwoo, you can fuck me. I know you havenât finished yet,â you grumble.
âIn a rush to go somewhere?â he teases.Â
âNo, but it must beâŚwell, I donât know. Hard for you,â you mumble into the sheets.Â
âIâve got excellent control,â Wonwoo says, all confidence. âIâm not in a rush to end this.âÂ
Despite your instance, he continues to lazily snap his hips into you. Itâs so slow, way too slow. He reaches down to pull you up against his chest again, still keeping the pace. His hands are on your breasts, squeezing them to anchor you to him. He rolls one of your nipples roughly between his fingers to see what he gets as a reaction. Your moan seems to spur him on further. Each time pain shoots through some part of your body, it only seems to turn you on more. Itâs easy to forget why you agreed to this in the first place.Â
For all the demands, Wonwoo is actually very attentive as well. He peppers kisses from behind your ear all the way down your shoulder and back, paying special attention to the areas that seem to get the best response from you. Heâs also careful with where he nips you, never biting hard enough to leave a mark somewhere that couldnât be easily hidden. The entire experience has been so all-consuming that there isnât space for any other thoughts in your head. Itâs just him and this hotel room thatâs entirely too fancy.Â
He must feel that youâre starting to get worked up because he pushes you back down into the bed. His pace finally picks up again, which is good because youâre sprinting towards being too sore to actually enjoy it anymore. The pace gets much faster again, not nearly as rhythmic as before. His fingers dig into your hips as he thrusts. Itâs the first time it actually feels like heâs losing control.Â
âOh my god,â you cry out. âIâm gonna come again. Oh my god!âÂ
âMe too,â he groans through a stuttered breath. âFuck, where can I come?âÂ
âI donât care,â you cry out. Youâre about to have your third orgasm. âOn my back, on my ass, I donât fucking care, just come with me.âÂ
You press a finger to your clit to try and help you over that last bit to tumble over the edge so that Wonwoo can chase his own relief. The second your body starts shaking, you feel him pull out. He must pump his cock a few times because thereâs a slight delay before you feel something hit your back. You feel a little proud with how much cum you feel on your skin, like maybe he was a little more affected by you than he wanted to let on.Â
As soon as Wonwoo lays down next to you on the bed, you also collapse onto your side. The bed is soft, but your knees are still a little sore from spending so much time on them. Wonwoo immediately pulls you into him so that he can kiss you breathless. His hand is behind your head, keeping you from pulling away. The chemistry between the two of you is intense. Not something you were prepared for. Itâs clear that if one of you doesnât stop, then youâll be fucking him again. And your body needs a break.
âI should get cleaned up,â you say when you pull back, more than slightly breathless.Â
âLet me just get cleaned up a little and then you can take a shower,â he says.Â
He presses a kiss to your temple and then gets up off the bed. Thereâs no point in pretending you arenât watching him as he walks to the bathroom. Heâs all lean lines and unexpected muscles. Nobody should be allowed to look the way he does, to look so good that Greek gods would be jealous. And yet here he is.Â
A few minutes later, he emerges from the bathroom and arches an eyebrow at you. Thereâs a towel slung low around his hips in a way that should be a sin. âYouâre going to make me think that you want more.â
âI donât even know if Iâm going to be able to stand,â you joke as an answer.
It surprises you a little when he comes over to the bed and helps you up. That is, until you see the way his eyes take you in. Thereâs nothing soft there, only predatory. Like youâre a meal he wants to return to. Your brain still feels a little slow to catch up, but registers something like heâs analyzing you. Still, he helps you get to the bathroom, points out the toiletries, and then disappears back into the room.Â
By the time youâre clean and wrapped in the softest bathrobe youâve ever worn, Wonwoo is sitting at the table wearing shorts and his glasses with nothing else. Heâs scrolling absently through his phone and picking at some snacks that hadnât been there when you had gone to shower. You didnât think youâd been in there long, so itâs surprising he was able to get something up so quickly. When he notices youâre out of the bathroom, he indicates the food.
âI ordered us some snacks and they were happy to get them up here quickly,â he says.Â
You take a seat across from him a little apprehensively. This is the part that you hadnât really considered. How do you excuse yourself from the situation in a way that ensures youâll see him again? Itâs not that you want to have a repeat, though thereâs part of your brain that is not opposed like you should be. Itâs justâŚwell with the room and the toiletries and the fast room service, youâre sure that this is the man youâre looking for. Which, admittedly, might make things a little complicated. But, you do have a job to do.
âI guess I am hungry,â you admit and reach for something.
âGlad youâre not going to make me eat alone,â he muses.Â
âYou already paid for dinner and drinks, I wasnât expecting more treats,â you admit.Â
âSeems fitting after the mindblowing sex,â he says and watches you, a clear glint to his eyes. âI canât get over how insanely hot it was to watch you squirt for me.âÂ
Your cheeks redden without your permission. Heâs so free with admitting it even with the moment having passed. Maybe heâs more trouble than you realized.Â
âSeems like I wasnât the only one to enjoy myself if my back is any indication,â you toss out.Â
âI really enjoyed the way you told me I could come on your back,â he shares.
âAnd my ass,â you remind him.
âI got that too,â he reminds you. âAnd what a nice ass it is.âÂ
âCareful or Iâll ask you to blow my back out again,â you say, voice slightly betraying that youâre affected by his very presence.Â
âThat makes me think you were going to head out and never see me again,â Wonwoo ventures.
âI havenât decided yet,â you say, trying to be coy.
Wonwoo fixes you with a stare that you canât quite decipher. It nearly makes you squirm under the intensity. Is he just like that? The kind of person that does everything with that burning look in his eyes.Â
âLet me ask you something, Agent,â he begins and your mouth runs dry. You do everything you can not to let him know that youâre a second away from losing it. âDo you fuck all your targets? Or am I special?â
The way he smirks at you lets you know that he knows heâs onto something. Knows exactly who you are. Or maybe who you work for, at least. Heâs made you and youâre not entirely sure youâre safe anymore. Youâre also not entirely sure what the best move is. Probably take half a second too long to decide if his face is any indication.Â
âAgent? Target?â you laugh out. âIâm sure I donât know what you mean.âÂ
âDonât you?â he presses. âReally, we shouldnât be lying to each other so early in the relationship.âÂ
âIâm here doingâŚâ you start.
âResearch, yes. Thatâs what you said. And you almost had me when it took so long to run into you again. Your Spanish is flawless. It doesnât sound like someone that learned at some secret agency. Youâre much better at languages than any of the other agents that have come after me. And waiting so long to meet me again, genius. It really had me second guessing who you were,â he says. âBut then, you made a mistake. Do you know what it was?âÂ
âGoing on a date with someone thatâs clearly a little delusional?â you ventured. âI donât know what youâre talking about.âÂ
âOh, I think you do,â he says, confident. âIâll tell you where you fucked up. It was dinner tonight. No, not something you said or did because you were shockingly smooth with it. Itâs that you agreed to it at all. I suggested a place no researcher would ever go to. Because it used to be the site of a religious monument, but it fell into disrepair. A local crime family took it over. Only locals bother going there, but no researcher ever would.âÂ
Your heart sinks. Through all your research and all your planning, you knew that you would never be able to get everything. There just wasnât the time. So, you had to hope that the person you were chasing wouldnât notice any small missteps. Or would write them off with your cover story. What you had not planned for was this. In all your careful consideration, you had not planned to go on a date with the art thief himself. He had you and he knew it. Itâs hard to see the right path out of this.Â
It had been a gamble to get close to him the way you had. A gamble that you questioned taking and took anyway. A gamble you took without clearing it with Seungcheol. Usually, getting close to a target this way, you talk to him to make sure that he thinks itâs a good idea too. Make sure that this kind of move will fit the profile for the person that youâre chasing. This time, youâre flying blind. You had gotten a little ahead of yourself. A little sloppy. This isnât the type of work youâre known for. Itâs not the reason that you were sent down to Buenos Aires to chase him on a secret mission.Â
âOne mistake,â you sigh with a shake of your head.Â
âYeah, just the one,â he agrees.Â
âSo why did you invite me back here?â you ask.Â
Wonwoo shrugs. âIâm curious about you.âÂ
âCurious? You risked inviting me back to your actual hotel room over curiosity?â you ask, looking around.Â
âWhoâs to say this is actually my room?â he says with another casual shrug. You clock it on his face as soon as he says it.Â
âNo, it is your actual room. The comfort, the speed of the room service, the way things are laid out. Itâs not staged. This is just where youâre staying,â you observe. That makes him smile in a way youâre not expecting.
âGood eye,â he agrees. âNow for my question. Do you fuck all your targets?âÂ
âNo,â you say shortly.Â
âWhy even agree to go on a date with me, then?â he presses.Â
You sigh and sit further back into your chair. Take a piece of fruit from the table to buy yourself some time. âI donât know. It wasnât a good decision, obviously. I wasnât even sure you were my target. There was justâŚsomething about you.âÂ
âSo youâve never fucked a target before? Iâm special?â he asks with a smirk.
âI didnât say that,â you respond. âI just donât usually fuck a target without clearing it first.âÂ
âWho knows youâre here with me?â he asks.
âNobody,â you answer. Itâs too honest.Â
Youâre not sure if you should have admitted that and even less sure if heâll believe you. It is the truth, though. Nobody in the world knows where you are right now. Itâs kind of a crossroads for you because Wonwoo isnât dangerous. Heâs never been violent, as far as your information shows. Despite being physically separated from your bag, youâre not exactly unarmed. And yes, he does look like heâs in shape, but youâre still confident that you can take him if it comes to that. Once again, your mind is running through a million calculations a second as you realize you definitely should have talked to Seungcheol.Â
âIâm trying to figure you out,â he admits.
âHowâs that going?â you ask sarcastically.Â
âNot as well as it would normally,â he says. Itâs something else thatâs honest between the two of you. More honest than youâre expecting. âMost people are too easy to figure out. Itâs boring. Nothing about you makes sense to me.âÂ
âAnd what about me is so difficult for you to figure out?â you ask, still lacing your words with sarcasm.Â
âYou know, despite me figuring out that youâre after me, youâre actually the best agent that theyâve ever sent. You fit into your role seamlessly. Youâre just the right amount of charming. You blend into your surroundings because you donât try to do anything to dull yourself. Against my better judgment, I am impressed. And yet, you still decided to come on the date. Youâre clearly the best they have and youâre still here,â he says, gaze soft but analytical on you.Â
âIâm going to keep my mouth shut,â you say carefully.Â
âWhy?â he asks.Â
âYou disarm me,â you admit. âI know so much about you and yet, here I am. Unwilling to leave even though you know what Iâm here to do.âÂ
âDo you still want to turn me in?â he asks.
âAre you going to disappear into the wind the second I walk out that door?â you counter.Â
He regards you for a moment. A moment too long, really. It makes you squirm in your seat. This isnât going at all how you would have imagined. âNo.âÂ
âWhy?â you ask.
âBecause Iâm waiting to see how this whole thing plays out. You havenât said that you want to turn me in. I can see youâre conflicted about it. So, Iâm going to see how this plays out,â he answers. He holds up a hand when you open your mouth. Seems to predict youâre going to ask why again. âBecauseâŚokay, look. I know this is really weird. I know youâre here to try and find me. But, youâre actually interesting and that sex was fucking good. So, I donât know, call me cocky. Iâm not ready to let you walk away just yet.â
âIf I can walk at all,â you grumble.Â
âYou were walking just fine from the bathroom. Maybe I need to really make sure you canât walk,â he muses.Â
The eye contact is too much and you turn your head away. Youâre positive heâs onto you, especially when you carefully cross your legs. Itâs just that heâs right, isnât he? You can sit here and pretend that you only slept with him to keep him close while you tried to figure him out. Can say that it was all just part of the job and you didnât enjoy it. Can say that you wanted to take a different approach since nobody else has been able to catch him.
Thatâs also very clearly a lie.
Seungcheol likes to know what his agents are up to, particularly when it comes to agents like you that deal with secret missions. Since you started as friends before he had to retire to his desk, heâs also very protective of you. He hates it when you suggest using your charm on a target like this. So, no, this isnât just another target. This is something else entirely. You have to admit that you actually enjoyed it. That you would like to do it again. That you actually donât even want to leave his room because youâre not convinced youâll ever see him again. Which is really stupid, isnât it? You should not care if you never see him again. Unless it means that you failed your mission. Thatâs not why youâre worrying about never seeing him again, though.Â
Just as youâre about to open your mouth and say something else, your phone chirps from your bag. Itâs a sign. You know it is. The sound is tied to Seungcheol. Which means heâs looking for a check-in. Which means youâre late, something that never happens with you. Youâre standing up to get your phone before even realizing it. Wonwooâs eyes track your movements.Â
Cheol: hope youâre enjoying your trip! Send pictures when you can
Itâs code. Sent through a normal message so that it doesnât look suspicious. And so that it gives you the chance to ignore it if youâre not in a place where you can answer him. You donât even hear Wonwoo approach as youâre mentally calculating how to respond to this.
âIs that code?â he asks and you nearly jump out of your skin at the sound of his low voice by your ear. God, nobody should have a voice like his.
âItâs my handler, I guess you could say,â you answer.
âAre you going to call him?â he asks.
âHeâll worry if I donât,â you say and realize itâs true.Â
Wonwoo steps around you to grab his own phone and then returns to his position at the table. âIâll be quiet if you want to call.âÂ
Thereâs something kind of hot about how he says it. Like he doesnât actually want to let you leave. Or like itâs an order to stay. Youâre not sure if youâre reading too much into it. When you look over at him, his eyes are on his phone, but his lips turn up in a smile. He knows your eyes are on him and heâs still playing a game. A game that you just might lose, for the first time in your life.Â
With a sigh, you shake your head and just fire off a text in response. You donât have it in you to call Seungcheol and you also arenât exactly sure what to say. Heâs always been able to read your tone like itâs his own. After telling him you might have a lead, heâs going to know something is wrong. This is going to be a problem.
You: itâs been amazing, iâm loving each new thing i get to see in person. Iâll have some pictures to show you tomorrow!
Itâs a signal that youâre not going to have anything new to share with him tonight and not to contact you again until you check in the next day. Youâre not really sure if this is the right decision, but you need time to clear your head. This is the only way that you can see getting that. Itâs too hard to think about making a decision when Wonwoo is still half naked and looking at you like youâre prey. At least you can assume that you could take him if you needed to. Thankfully, heâs not really looking at you like that kind of prey.Â
âIâll call him tomorrow,â you say.
âAnd what will you do tonight?â Wonwoo asks, looking up at you.
âIâm all yours, at least for tonight,â you say.Â
Youâre surprised the look he gives you doesnât melt you into the floor. âI can work with that.â
The next day brings more confusion than the night before. At least youâre back in your own hotel room and out of the intoxicating orbit of Wonwoo. The downside is that you couldnât leave his bed without agreeing to lunch plans with him. Both of you wanted to get breakfast together, but hadnât been able to get out of bed in time for that. You turned down his offer to just buy you new clothes so you wouldnât have to leave his sight. Thankfully, he does seem to understand that you need a minute to process everything in the last 24 hours. Itâs been a bit of a whirlwind.
Thatâs not what you need to focus on right now, though. You donât have any more messages from Seungcheol, which is what you expected. Still, you need to call him before he doesnât something to check on you. Like sending Chan to your hotel with some made up story. You donât want to put anyone in that position. You also donât really know what youâre going to say. When you left Wonwooâs hotel room, he made it clear: the choice was yours. He wants to see you again and he also knows that heâs asking a lot. Too much, probably. So, heâs giving you a choice. If you show up at lunch to meet him, then youâre at least willing to get to know him a little more before deciding anything. If you stand him up, then heâll know you canât agree to that. Itâs a major gamble for him because you know what he looks like and his real name. You have more than you need to put an end to years of his hard work.Â
Nothing in your life has prepared you for this. Not really. Sure, you train for missions and you perfect your skills. But, emotions have never been part of it. Itâs always been so easy to separate your humanity from your job. Kind of like you just switch of anything that makes you normal and go into mission-mode. You once compared it to being an actor because youâre just playing a part. None of it is real and none of it is really your decision. This is uncharted territory for you.
Once you catch your breath, you pull a device out of the secret pocket in your bag so that you can connect it to your phone. Itâll scramble the signals and make the line secure so that you can call Seungcheol. Itâs a bit of normalcy that youâre craving in the madness around you.Â
âFinally, Iâve been worried,â Seungcheol answers.Â
âI answered you right away,â you point out.
âYes, to say that you would not be calling me,â Seungcheol presses and you sigh.
âBecause I donât have anything new to report,â you say without even realizing when you made the decision. The lie flows so easily. âIâve been cataloging everything on everyone I see at the museums and galleries. Cross checking the names coming into the country. Surveying anyone that sticks out as I check things out.âÂ
âHey, itâs okay,â Seungcheol cuts in.
âIâm here to find him, though,â you point out. Youâre not sure why youâre doing this.Â
âI know,â he says. âBut, Iâd rather you be safe.â
âIâm always safe,â you lie. Thankfully, he doesnât seem to pick up on it.Â
âI know, but I also know youâre competitive,â he says. âRemember, weâve already sent no less than 6 teams to find him and theyâve all failed.âÂ
âI donât fail, though. Thatâs why you sent me,â you say. Youâre not even sure why youâre arguing with him.Â
âJust be careful. What happened with that lead you thought you had?â he asks.Â
âA dead end,â you say with a practiced sigh. âDoes the intelligence say heâs still in the city?âÂ
âI canât imagine heâd leave without taking anything,â Seungcheol says.Â
âGood point,â you say. âIâll keep looking.âÂ
âDo you want me to send back-up?â he asks.
âItâs your mission,â you say noncommittally. âIf you think itâll help and we can still fly under the radar, then by all means.âÂ
âI was thinking of Chan since heâs still kind of in the area,â he says.
âAh, yeah, Iâm not sure,â you admit.
âYouâre right, I know. I do want you to formally meet him soon, though. But, definitely not mid-mission,â he agrees. âJust be careful and keep me updated. If it goes on too long, weâll just pull you. Maybe he got spooked.âÂ
âYeah, that works,â you agree.Â
âSee you when youâre back,â he says.
âSee you,â you answer and hang up.
It feels awful to lie to him, of all people. Heâs one of the only people that youâve ever trusted in your life. The only one that knows exactly who you are, knows all your demons, and still accepts you. He knows just how many people are six feet under because of you, knows the ways youâve had to use your body, knows the lies youâve told and the people youâve hurt, both physically and emotionally. He knows all your scars and he accepts it. Because you know all his scars, too. It sucks to lie to him.
Sometimes they say that indecision is still a decision. Thatâs where you are now. You can say that you havenât made a decision about what youâre going to do with Wonwoo. You can say that youâre waiting for more information. But, in a way, youâve made at least one decision in his favor. You didnât tell Seungcheol that your lead turned out to be the art thief himself. No. Instead, youâre showering and getting ready to meet him again, about to make yet another decision. Maybe you were always going to agree to lunch rather than stand him up. Heâs got a lot to lose here too. Itâs far more complicated than it should be.Â
Your head is a little in the clouds by the time you leave your room to head down to the lobby and out into the comfortable winter air. If you spend a little more time than strictly necessary making sure you look nice, well thatâs your business. The only drawback is that you donât have Wonwooâs phone number, at your own insistence, and so he may think you decided to stand him up. That worry lasts as long as it takes for you to reach the lobby. Thatâs where you see him, sitting casually in an armchair with his eyes locked on you. Thereâs no reason for the way your heart skips over such a simple outfit. Itâs just a t-shirt and a leather jacket. Why are you nearly losing your mind?
âWhat are you doing here?â you ask and he gives you the most charming smile youâve ever seen. It probably even puts your own smile to shame.
âI took a chance that you would decide in my favor,â he says and stands up.
âConfident,â you say, âbut still, I was supposed to meet you at the restaurant since I hadnât decided.â
âItâs a date. Iâm picking you up,â he says and surprises you by placing a gentle kiss on your cheek .Â
âIsnât that chivalrous of you,â you comment while trying to convince your heart to stop beating out of your chest.Â
âShall we?â he asks and motions for you to walk ahead of him.
The chivalry doesnât stop at picking you up at your hotel, unfortunately for you. He opens the door and then gently takes your hand. Thereâs a hand on your back when you step around him. He puts himself between you and any traffic. Itâs the best anyone has ever treated you and you hate that youâre even noticing that. Now, youâre thinking that you should have stood him up for an entirely different reason.
Lunch feels like the most normal thing in the world. The real reason for being in this beautiful city doesnât come up at all. Instead, you talk about life and interests. The type of music and food that you like. What you do in your free time. Itâs exactly what you imagine first or second dates to be like. Not that you have much experience with actually dating.Â
It only gets deeper from there with Wonwoo telling you more about himself. Not about how he really makes money, but it certainly helps you understand how he got involved and how he stays under the radar. As it turns out, he comes from a lot of money. He doesnât say it in a way that sounds like heâs bragging. It makes sense, though. Everything about him screams old money, which fits the profile you put together. The way he carries himself, the way he speaks, the way he dresses. It doesnât feel like someone thatâs made his money from stealing art. You learn that heâs involved in a lot of charities, which surprises you a bit. You also learn that he sponsors students in a video game design program in his home country. Thereâs so much more to him than stealing art. In fact, that seems to be such a small part of who he is. Itâs more than a little surprising, which is odd since itâs usually so hard to surprise you. Itâs clear that heâs grown up around art. All this time and heâs just been hiding in plain sight.Â
The two of you sit at lunch for so long that the servers finally, very politely, indicate that itâs time to leave. Itâs never been this easy to sit with someone in your entire life. Itâs a level of comfort that you should absolutely not feel with someone like Wonwoo. But, you canât help it. You canât help the way you feel around him. Canât really fight the feelings that keep threatening to bubble up.Â
The roads arenât nearly as busy when you walk back towards your hotel. Even though itâs a tourist city, it still quiets down in the mid-afternoon when the local businesses close down. The tourists seem to use the time to also relax or take advantage of certain monuments being quieter. It lends itself to the comfortable silence that settles around you and Wonwoo on the walk.Â
When you reach the lobby, you turn to face Wonwoo and your breath catches a little. The sun in July isnât as strong, but it still provides a backlight like heâs some sort of dark angel. Which sounds insane, even if your head. There have been so many beautiful people in your life, yet this is the one that has you forgetting how to put words together. Itâs like he knows exactly what youâre thinking when he steps into your space and takes your face in his hands. He kisses you so fiercely that you forget your name. Itâs the kind of kiss that doesnât look like much from the outside, but changes your entire world on the inside.Â
âWell how am I supposed to go back to my room and leave you now?â you ask against his lips when he pulls back. You can feel the smile on his own lips when he kisses you again.
âIsnât it obvious?â he whispers.Â
âNo,â you whisper back and kiss him again.
âI donât want you to leave me,â he says.Â
That makes you pull back sharply so that you can search his face. Does he realize how that sounds? It makes you wonder if he means more than just tonight. What is he trying to do to you? How many ways can one man make you reconsider everything you stand for? Nothing about his face looks smug or even insincere. In fact, he looks the way you imagine you feel. A little smitten and a lot unsure of what to do next.Â
âAnd what would I do instead?â you ask, though you have an idea where heâs going.
âGo pack a bag of some of your things and come stay with me for the next few days,â he requests. Itâs just bordering on a demand, even though itâs clearly your call.Â
âAre you crazy? We barely know each other,â you protest without much heat.Â
âWhat better way to get to know each other?â he counters. He grabs your hips, pulling you close to his body so he can wrap his arms around you. âAnd think about it. I can see youâre still not sure what you want to do. If youâre with me, youâll know where I am at all times. I canât get into any trouble while youâre still deciding.âÂ
âI suppose you do make a point,â you concede.Â
âI have never done anything this reckless in my life. So, Iâm just asking for a chance,â he shares.
Itâs a little insane for him to say this is the most reckless thing heâs done in his life. Surely, stealing art is crazier than this. Which would make you lean towards not believing him if it werenât for the voice in the back of your head. That little voice that agrees with him. Youâve put your life in danger more times than you can count, but saying yes to the man in front of you feels like the most dangerous idea yet. Maybe itâs because you know itâs not your body youâre putting on the line, but your heart. And maybe, just maybe, thatâs what he means too. That heâs never taken the chance to chase someone like this. Or maybe you just want to believe that you might be special.Â
All you can do is nod at him and watch the smile that breaks across his face. Itâs honest, unguarded. Itâs real. Thereâs nothing behind it except genuine happiness that you agreed to spend the next few days with him. Before you can second guess your decision, you give him one more kiss and nearly run up to your room.Â
Being separated from him gives you the chance to actually catch your breath. To focus on what you need to bring with you. Since, apparently, youâre not going to reconsider if this is actually a good idea or not. You know you should. You know that this is another one of those moments that you chalk up to indecision when your actual decision could not be any louder. Again, youâre reminded of what youâre doing here. What youâre supposed to be doing here. This man is your enemy. Heâs the person youâre supposed to be arresting and bringing into The Agency to face sentencing. Youâre a good agent. You always put the mission ahead of yourself, your thoughts, your beliefs, or even your relationships. This isnât a version of yourself that you recognize and it should stop you in your tracks.
Instead, you decide which dress to pack away and what pair of shoes looks best. For the first time in your life, youâre diving in first and asking questions later. Or never.Â
It shouldnât be surprising that you end up naked in Wonwooâs bed minutes after crossing the threshold to his hotel room. Not with how things have gone so far for the two of you. Yet, what is surprising is that the sex is even better than the night before. Youâre catching your breath, tucked into Wonwooâs side, body tacky with sweat but so impossibly happy. His hand thatâs around you absently traces patterns into your skin. Itâs honestly like youâve known him for years. Itâs insane to realize how comfortable you feel when thatâs not something you ever experience. Not like this.Â
Itâs also shocking to you how much this man wants to share with you. He carries on your chats from lunch as if he hadnât just fucked you into his mattress yet again. Like this means more than some dirty sex holed up in a hotel in a foreign city. Makes you feel like you might actually mean something to him, which is a very dangerous feeling to have. Both of you know that this canât mean more than what it is. At least, you think you know that and you think he might too. But, thereâs a clear understanding that you wonât talk about it. Not now, at least.Â
Wonwoo decides that he wants to take you somewhere fancy for dinner. The type of place that you would never consider going to while on a mission. Though, youâre always prepared for anything. When you were packing up your things in your hotel room, you even grabbed a couple nicer dresses. All they needed was a quick steam, which the hotel staff had been only too happy to accommodate. Any protests about it being too much fell on deaf ears. He was set and the two of you were going to a famous restaurant. All you had to do was shower and get ready. Your dress would be ready by the time you needed it.Â
Itâs clear you donât really understand the limits to Wonwooâs wealth, if there even are any, when you arrive at the restaurant. Itâs the kind of place where you usually need reservations well in advance. Itâs not the kind of place you can just show up at. Despite that, the host leads you back to a semi-private area where youâre tucked into a corner booth. Itâs clearly one of the nicest tables in the place. You think you catch Wonwoo sliding the host something when he shakes their hand before he turns back to you. All thoughts go out the window when he slides in right next to you, not leaving any space.Â
Wonwooâs Spanish really is very remedial and so you help him decipher the menu and order. It gives you pause when there arenât prices anywhere on the menu, but heâs quick to wave off any concerns. Insists that itâs his treat. You donât want to think thatâs something you could get used to. It isnât like you have any real trouble affording nice things. Your salary is high and you donât have much to spend money on. This is a different level, though. Itâs even different from the times youâve gone on a mission and charmed your target. That always feels temporary. Like youâre something of an imposter. You donât get those feelings here with Wonwoo.
Letting him pick out which outfit you wore may have been a mistake. You discover this once you get your drinks and the waiter leaves you alone. His hand rests possessively on your thigh, against the bare skin of your leg exposed by the slit in your dress. His body is angled towards you and heâs encouraging you to continue telling your story. But, he has to know heâs distracting, too, with the way his hand slides further up your thigh. What started as arguably innocent ventures quickly into dangerous territory.Â
âYou were saying?â he prompts. His hand is inside the fabric of your dress now, keeping you from pressing your thighs together like you want to.Â
âI, uhâŚâ you stutter as he digs his hand into the soft flesh there. âWonwoo, arenât you worried?â
âAbout what?â he asks innocently.
âGetting caught,â you hiss and look down at your lap.
âNo, sweetheart, Iâm not worried,â he says and you glare at him, âbecause youâre going to be good for me and be quiet.â
âI donât knowâŚâ you start and stop as soon as his pinky grazes along your entrance through your panties. âFuck.âÂ
âDoesnât seem like you actually want me to stop,â he points out.
âI, fuck, you know I donât but there are people,â you say softly.
âI paid good money for this table. I donât think weâll be disturbed,â he tells you.Â
âIâŚâ you start. When he pulls his finger away, you nearly whine.
âI need to hear you say you want it,â he says.
âWhat?â you ask, a little louder than you intended.
âUse your words,â he directs and you glare.
âFuck you,â you hiss, earning a chuckle out of him.Â
âNot yet,â he retorts.
âFine, yes. I want your fingers inside me here in this damn restaurant,â you say.
Heâs expecting this answer. Itâs written all over his face. This time, he doesnât tease you. Doesnât waste any time because you may not have much of it. He simply pushes your panties to the side and slides his first finger into you. The angle doesnât make it easy but his fingers are long and slender, like they were built for something like this. Itâs hard to keep from making a sound, so you try to do anything to distract yourself from the way he pumps into you. Or the way he adds a second finger so quickly.Â
When you pick up your drink to take a sip from the straw, you watch his eyes on you. They seem to darken the second that you wrap your lips around the straw. His fingers pump into you even faster. And his lips are demanding on yours when you set the drink back down. You moan softly into his mouth without really considering if anyone is paying attention or if they can hear you. His tongue tangles with yours frantically while he tries to get you off right in that booth.Â
This is new for you. You definitely didnât think you would get so turned on by the fact that anyone could walk back over to see what you were doing. Anyone could hear the noises youâre making. Anyone could figure it out. When he feels that your pussy clenching around his fingers, he pulls away from the kiss. Leans his forehead against yours so that he can whisper filthy things in the space between you. Tells you how good you feel and how he loves watching you when youâre about to come. Moans about how tight you are. How pliant you are for him. Reminds you to be quiet. Tells you he canât wait to taste you on his fingers. Thatâs what finally pushes you over the edge.
Your fingers grip the edge of the booth underneath you as you come hard and fast. He lazily guides you through it and then follows through by bringing his fingers to his lips. Itâs so hot that you consider asking if you can just leave and go back to the room to be fucked properly. But, then your stomach rumbles and you think better of it. Itâs only another few minutes before the first course arrives with a slightly knowing look from the waiter. After that first course, you excuse yourself to the bathroom to clean up, at least a little. You deem your panties ruined and just remove them, tucking them away into your bag. Youâll have to be a little more careful the rest of the night.
This dinner is somehow even better than the first and it has nothing to do with the place being expensive, though the food is definitely amazing. You also donât think it really has anything to do with the way Wonwoo fingered you under the table. Thatâs definitely a first for you. Exhibitionism hasnât been your thing before, but maybe heâs got you learning new things about yourself. It had only taken him a minute to realize that you werenât wearing underwear anymore. It definitely took him another minute to regain his composure.
The thing that actually makes this dinner better than the first is the man across from you. With his walls down, the entire night just feels that much more. Itâs one of the only times youâve ever felt your own guard come down. Itâs not smart and you donât care. You think you probably look a little punch drunk to anyone that can see your table. Then, you meet Wonwooâs eyes again and think he probably looks the same. You never really have the chance to enjoy dates, but even if you did, this would still probably top them all. Itâs all the little things. The way Wonwoo carefully brushes a strand of hair out of your face. The way he offers you a bite off his own plate when you say it looks good. The way he brings your knuckles up to his lips and presses feather light kisses to them.Â
âAre you going to insist on ordering dessert here too?â you ask after the main course.Â
âI was thinking we might have dessert back in our room,â he says and you raise an eyebrow.
âOur room?â you question.
âDonât test me,â he cautions.Â
âI wouldnât dare,â you say and lean into him to press a slow kiss to his cheek. Your hand brushes over his lap as a way to get closer.
âIs this you not testing me?â he asks when your hand brushes across his lap again.
âWhat? You can make me come on your fingers but I canât tease you a little?â you ask innocently.
Wonwoo grabs your hand and anchors it on your own thigh. âWeâre getting out of here and then you can show your appreciation however you want. We donât need to give them more of a show.âÂ
It seems like it takes an eternity to pay the bill (which Wonwoo doesnât let you see) and get a cab back to the hotel. The promise of something else simmers between you the entire time. Wonwoo keeps a hand on you the entire time. A hand on your lower back out of the restaurant, fingers intertwined with yours in the cab, an arm around you walking into the hotel. When you get into the elevator, he pulls you back against his chest as more people join. He masks it as affection and presses a kiss to your cheek, but you feel the desire beneath it.Â
The moment you cross into the room, you slip out of your shoes and turn around to press a kiss to Wonwooâs lips. The tension between the two of you is thick and itâs hard to remind yourself to come up for a breath. He overwhelms every one of your senses. Thereâs nothing but him in every corner of your brain when he kisses you like that.Â
Itâs almost embarrassing when he breaks the kiss and you chase his lips. âHow about dessert?â
âI thought that was just your way of sayingâŚâ you start and he directs your attention to the table. Thereâs an assortment of fruit, whipped cream, and melted chocolate there.Â
Youâre a little hesitant when he starts to walk to the table. It just feels incredibly intimate, which is true for a lot of what's happened with Wonwoo. But, this still feels different. It feels like more, once again. Wonwoo realizes that youâre not behind him and turns back to you. He closes the space between you yet again and places a hand on your cheek, impossibly soft.Â
âWhatâs going on in that pretty head of yours?â he asks.Â
âIâve never doneâŚthis,â you say softly into the quiet between you and him.Â
âPretty sure weâve already fucked several times,â Wonwoo says to lighten the mood.
âNo, I mean, thisâŚI donât know. The desserts and the whipped cream and chocolate. It just feels, I donât know, intimate,â you admit.Â
âYou donât have to do anything you donât want to,â he assures you.Â
Itâs absolutely insane that youâre hesitating. It doesnât have to be some super intimate thing. Itâs not like Wonwoo hasnât already seen every inch of you and gotten to know your body better than anyone should in that period of time. But, this is far beyond the point where you can convince yourself any part of this is for the mission anymore. This isnât just to keep him close. This is no longer indecision, as much as you want to pretend that it is.
âIs this your go-to move, then? Have a bunch of sweets delivered to the hotel room and seduce people with being all gentle?â you ask.
âIâve definitely never done this before,â he says and itâs too honest.Â
Instead of answering him you just kiss him because itâs the only answer you can think of. Somehow, knowing that this is different for him too makes it feel less overwhelming for you. You drag him back towards the table until youâre leaning against it. Your back arches into him as he licks into your mouth. His hands wrap around you to keep you tight against his body. He pulls away again and youâre ready for it this time.Â
Wonwoo reaches an arm behind you and dips a strawberry in some of the chocolate. He brings it to your lips and watches intently as you get your mouth around it. The first bite sends a little bit of juice and chocolate over your lips. Just as youâre about to wipe it away, Wonwoo pulls the remainder of the strawberry back and kisses it away. Itâs like that one action unlocks any hang ups you have. You twist around to scoop up some whipped cream with your finger. Your eyes lock on Wonwoo as you slowly lick it off. With it still in your mouth, you kiss him hard, enjoying the way your tongues dance and the tastes.Â
The two of you take turns dipping fruit and feeding it to each other. The kisses become more and more desperate in between feeding each other. Itâs a little messy, though, so you unbutton Wonwooâs shirt and slide it off his arms. He undoes your dress to slide it off your body, removing your bra along the way. You rid him of his pants and briefs as well so that youâre not the only one standing there naked.Â
When you reach back to get more fruit, Wonwoo grabs your hand to stop you. Thereâs a question in your eyes that he leaves unanswered as he moves things out of the way behind you. Then, heâs sitting you on the edge of the table and reaching for the whipped cream, which also answers your question. He puts some of the topping on your breast and sucks into your skin to lick it off you. Your legs part on their own as you lean back on the table to encourage him to get closer. He swirls his tongue around your nipple before softly nipping at your skin. Without warning, he bites into the flesh of your breast and laves over the spot to soothe you.Â
Food should not be this sexy. Maybe itâs just that itâs Wonwoo tempting you, but youâve never been this turned on. His tongue is everywhere across your breasts and your stomach. Covering you in kisses while also licking the whipped cream or chocolate off of you. Your nails scratch down his back each time he nips into your skin. Somehow the sensations are everywhere all at once. You wrap your legs around his waist to anchor him closer to you.Â
âI need you inside me,â you whine out with Wonwoo kissing along your neck.
âAre you sure youâre ready for that?â he asks into your skin.
âFeel for yourself,â you encourage.Â
Wonwoo pulls away from your neck and looks at you with lust. He presses his fingers to your mouth and you suck them in without even thinking about it. Theyâre sweet as you swirl your tongue around them. âFuck, thatâs hot.âÂ
As if itâs confirmation, he ruts against you, seemingly hard just from all the making out and the food. You pull his fingers from your mouth and guide them to your already dripping pussy. Heâs not the only one thatâs gotten insanely turned on. As soon as you guide his fingers through your folds he groans again.Â
Neither one of you is in the mood to wait and he doesnât waste any time angling his hand so he can pump his fingers inside you. Just presses two fingers right in and adds a third to try and open you up. It makes you scream out, praising his fingers with how quickly they work you over. He removes his hand entirely too quickly and youâre whining at the loss. Wonwoo runs a hand along his cock, pumping a couple times and catching some of the precum to spread it along his length. Itâs not enough, but you donât really care right now.Â
âPlease, Wonwoo, I need you,â you beg.
âFeeling a little desperate, princess?â he teases, that cocky smirk back on him.Â
âJust fuck me already,â you whine.Â
Wonwoo doesnât say anything else, just lines himself up and presses his tip into you. It stretches you out and youâre a little surprised that he goes so slowly. Then, you realize that it feels like more when heâs inching into you like this. His eyes watch you for any signs of discomfort. He leans forward and catches your lips in the neediest kiss of the night when he bottoms out in you. You lean back onto your elbows, bringing him along with you. The kisses get sloppier as he starts to thrust into you.Â
He pulls away from you to reposition and presses your leg up so that he can get deeper. You let your leg fall over his arm so that you donât have to hold it up. The moans between the two of you are loud enough to drown out the sound of skin on skin as he fucks into you hard. You canât help it, though, and you throw your head back in pleasure.
âLook at me,â he directs roughly.Â
You moan in response but tilt your head back towards him. It feels like a chore and thatâs when it occurs to you. Taking hold of his free hand, you move it to your throat. For a second, his eyes go wide and his pace slows. Heâs searching your face for a clue before he grabs your throat a little more forcefully.
âAre you sure?â he asks.
âYes, fuck,â you groan out. âIâll tap you if itâs too much.âÂ
âYouâre so fucking hot,â he utters, flexing his fingers on your throat.
Somehow, Wonwoo seems to know the perfect amount of pressure. Itâs just tight enough that it makes it a little harder to breathe, but not so much that itâs actually choking you. He seems more comfortable than when he did it the first time. It also makes it easier to keep your eyes on him the way he wants. Everything feels heightened and itâs entirely too soon that youâre rushing to your high. You clench your walls around Wonwoo and he fucks you harder, groaning at the increased tightness.
âGonna come all over my dick again?â he asks and you moan.Â
You canât really say anything and you donât want to. This is all you need. Your hand winds down your body and you look at Wonwoo with a question in your eyes.
âGo ahead, baby, touch yourself,â he directs you.Â
Asking for permission to do anything is unlike you, but thereâs something about wanting to please this man that drives you to all sorts of new things. You rub your clit in time with his thrusts and it seems like only moments pass before youâre tipping over that edge.Â
Heavy breaths eventually subside to find Wonwoo slowly, almost lazily, fucking into you. His hands are now both on your hips as he waits for you to come down. You sit up with him still inside you and kiss him, slow and full of all sorts of unspoken things.
âYou really are fucking amazing,â you say, voice a little hoarse. âYou can move faster.â
âI was thinking we might need to get into the shower,â he says with a smirk, pressing a finger to your skin. Youâre about to object when you watch him pull it away and it sticks.Â
âMaybe I can take care of you in there, then,â you say and kiss him softly.Â
His eyes seem to light up a little at that. He slides out of you gently and walks slowly into the bathroom. You meant what you said. Shower sex is definitely not your thing because itâs never as sexy as people make it out to be. It can be slippery and there arenât really any good positions. That doesnât mean you canât help him out a little.Â
Wonwoo has other ideas first, it seems. Once the water is warm enough, both of you get in and he lathers up a loofah to gently wash all the stickiness from your body. Itâs gentle in a way youâre not expecting and impossibly thoughtful. You relax against his back with his arms around you while he makes sure all the remnants are gone.Â
When youâre clean, you turn around to face him and kiss him hard. The water falling on your back creates the perfect sensation with the heat between the two of you. He gathers you against his body, hands sliding down to grip your ass. Itâs all you can do not to melt right on the spot. You think that you could probably kiss this man for the rest of your life and never get bored. Or never fully prepare yourself for the way it makes you feel.Â
You drop to your knees and take his cock in your hand. He leans back against the wall of the shower as he looks down on you. Itâs crazy to you how turned on this man gets (or stays) just from kissing or skin contact. No matter what, his body always seems to be ready for you. You run your tongue along his length and swirl your tongue around the tip. Youâre impatient and you know heâs been waiting, so you donât waste any time before you suck him into your mouth. You relax your throat and swallow as much of his cock as youâre able to, alternating between bobbing and hollowing out your cheeks.Â
âYou look so good looking up at me like that,â he groans.Â
You hum around his dick and Wonwoo grabs the back of your head to anchor you there. Tears prick at the corners of your eyes before he releases you and you can get a breath. Even in this position, you can tell that you actually have control over this man. Itâs a great feeling since heâs been in control every other time. His hips buck when you suck him back into you. Itâs definitely a powerful feeling. The groans also tell you what you already know, youâre good at this. Heâs putty in your hands.Â
With a few more bobs, heâs coming down your throat and then slumping back against the shower wall. It doesnât stop him from helping you up off your knees. You pepper light kisses along his collarbones before he surprises you and pulls you into another kiss. Itâs never been your experience that a man wants to kiss you like that, but he doesnât shy away.Â
âWe better get out of this shower before we run through all the hot water,â he says between kisses.
âYouâre right,â you say with a sigh.Â
The two of you step out of the shower and Wonwoo is quick to wrap you up in a towel. It takes everything in you to tell your heart to calm down. You know Wonwoo feels all the same things you do. Even if he's not free with vocalizing his emotions, his actions tell you exactly what heâs thinking. If you know where to look, that is. Youâre realizing that you definitely know where to work.Â
Twenty minutes later, your skin care routine is done and youâre curled up in bed in one of Wonwooâs oversized t-shirts. You know your alarm is going to be too early tomorrow since you need to check in with Seungcheol, but all you want to do tonight is curl up and talk more with this incredibly interesting man.Â
Something seems to shift now that youâre holed up in Wonwooâs hotel room with him for the next however many days. Before, he seemed hesitant to talk about the real reason you two crossed paths. Youâre not sure what causes the change or why he trusts that youâre not going to just turn around and burn him. Maybe itâs just that you havenât done it yet.Â
âWhat made you want to start stealing art?â you ask while the two of you are sitting outside on the balcony. This room really is too nice. It almost makes it hard to leave and explore.Â
âI donât know if it was that I wanted to steal art,â he chuckles.Â
âOkay, how did you start, then?â you ask with an affectionate eye roll.Â
âItâs going to sound stupid,â he says with an uncharacteristic shyness. âI guess, I donât know, I grew up in this house where nobody ever seemed to care what I was doing. I stole the first piece from my parents and sold it off to someone Iâd met at this underground club. I figured my parents would catch me and then at least Iâd have their attention for a minute.â
âIâm guessing they didnât catch you,â you comment.
âThey didnât even notice it was gone,â he says with a chuckle. âHow old were you?â you ask.
â16,â he answers immediately.
âSo youâve been doing thisâŚ?â you start, doing the math in your head.
â12 years, yeah,â he says. âIt took awhile to get to the point Iâm at now. I think for a while I was figuring that my parents would somehow catch on and give a shit about my life. By the time I was 19, I was really good at it and Iâd made a lot of contacts. I still moved in all those circles so I never looked out of place at a gallery or a museum. Nobody looked twice at me.â
âDid it ever get lonely?â you ask and Wonwoo regards you for a moment. âI just mean that you were still part of all these circles. You still went to all these parties and it seems like none of them knew you at all. You were hiding in plain sight because nobody knew you well enough to see it.â
âI had the networks of people that I sold to or accepted jobs from,â he says.
âBut everything Iâve ever seen says that you rarely met with those people in person. It was always online contact and leaving pieces somewhere after the money had been wired,â you share.
âI guess your agency got a few things right,â he mumbles.
âIt sounds loney,â you say sympathetically.
âI wish you were a little less observant,â he says like heâs trying for a joking tone.Â
Itâs immediately obvious that heâs a little tired and definitely lonely. You canât really imagine that type of life. Sure, youâve been working on your own or with a single partner for your entire adult life. But, youâve still been part of an organization. There are people that know you at your core. There are people that you can turn to when everything in life feels like it sucks. No matter how bad things get, you know there are people out there who can support you.
Almost involuntarily, a series of images pop into your head. Wonwoo in a suit at a charity gala, the type of person that everyone wants to approach. You can imagine people whispering behind their hands about going to speak to him or ask him to dance. Maybe trying to approach him at the bar. Then you see him just as clearly at home afterwards, alone and sitting on his couch with a drink in hand. You see him perusing a museum to get the lay of the land so that he can steal it later. Once again, alone. You see how he probably sits at home communicating with all his potential buyers.Â
Wonwoo reads the look on your face and assures you that itâs probably not as bad as youâre imagining things. Yes, he admits that heâs lonely sometimes and that heâs alone more than heâs with other people. Itâs hard for him to let anyone in. He doesnât want to have to account for his time or trust that they wonât blow his cover. Thereâs nobody in his life that he can be totally himself with, at least not until meeting you. But, he insists that it hasnât been so bad. Mostly, he prefers to be on his own anyway. He likes the quiet and the solitude. Likes to be able to enjoy his down time however he likes. He gets enough socialization when he goes to events as heâs expected to.Â
Which brings up a question. After over a decade of doing everything solo, why has he trusted you with all of this now? His answer comes more immediately than you would expect, yet it makes sense. You have something to lose here, too. Possibly even more than he does. After all, there have been a lot of teams that have been close to unraveling his mysterious identity. You, on the other hand, are supposed to be tracking him down. Not spending time locked away in his hotel room with him. That brings you up a little short because heâs right and youâre not planning on going anywhere.Â
He admits that you intrigue him. All his life, Wonwoo has appreciated a good puzzle or a good challenge. You present both to him, though it hasnât been as much of a challenge to get you to give him a chance as he expected. It is a challenge to try and unravel you. To try and figure out what made you say yes to the date and what makes you stay now. You also meet him on a level that nobody ever has before. You nearly blush at the way he describes your intelligence and how he feels more turned on by your brain than anyone before. Normally something like that would make you cringe. But, somehow Wonwoo makes it sound both sexy and endearing. Youâre just as challenged by him, too, so maybe you get it.Â
It also brings up some very conflicting feelings in you because itâs a reminder that you have a life entirely separate from him. You have a life that doesnât allow you to account for this time. At some point, you have to make a final choice. Itâs way too late to just turn Wonwoo in without any sort of repercussion. Itâs too late to act like this is all just in the name of bringing down one of the most difficult targets youâve had to track. In the name of getting to know Wonwoo better, youâve also shared a lot about yourself. A lot that someone like Seungcheol would be able to clock immediately as being true. Every moment you stay with Wonwoo makes your future more complicated. Things are already too hazy.Â
âOkay enough heavy stuff,â you declare and stand. âLetâs go do something.â
âSuch as?â he prompts.Â
âWeâre in a beautiful city, letâs go see some of it,â you suggest.
Wonwoo wants to take a minute to actually plan something, but you veto that. Heâs definitely not the spontaneous type, which you figured out before you were even sure who he was. It makes more sense now, knowing who he is. So it feels like more of a win that he relents and agrees to just go with the flow. Itâs not as if youâll be flying totally blind anyway. You did a lot of research before coming down for the mission and you know a lot of the places to see, both tourist places and some that are off the beaten path.Â
Once youâre outside of the hotel room, things feel different in a way you canât quite put your finger on. Everything in the hotel room feels real in the sense of getting to know each other. The conversations can be heavy and thereâs that constant need to rip each otherâs clothes off. Being outside exploring a foreign city feels real in an entirely different way. None of the conversations are heavy since youâre just appreciating the sights. But, you and Wonwoo trade off in taking pictures of each other (or even snap some together) and it feels like a glimpse at another life. It isnât a fantasy world because it does feel real, but it doesnât feel like an actual reality either. It almost feels like a mission youâre on where you and him would pretend to be a couple. You have to remind yourself this is actually a mission and youâre running around with your target because Wonwoo isnât your partner.
When youâre in Plaza de Mayo, you take a step back to allow Wonwoo to purchase something to eat. Itâs too cute to watch him stumble through his Spanish, constantly looking over at you as if asking for help. All you can do is smile as he mixes up hombre and hambre. The older woman putting the food together only smiles softly. Thereâs something incredibly cute about watching this stoic man get flushed over ordering in another language.Â
The next few days follow mostly the same pattern. You wake up earlier than Wonwoo so that you can pretend to work on the mission and actually check in with Seungcheol. Wonwoo pretends that heâs still asleep sometimes. Other times, he gets up and works on his own things. Itâs cute that heâll do anything to make it seem like you have privacy. Breakfast in the room always comes next because itâs an easy way to get ready for the day.Â
The days themselves are all a little bit different. You see the Piramide de Mayo, the Floralis Generica, the monuments to Juana Azurduy and General Jose de San Martin, Teatro Colon, the planetarium and several other interesting sights. The planetarium is a personal favorite of yours because itâs just kind of weird in an affectionate way. Itâs hard to truly pick a favorite though because each new stop teaches you more about the local culture. Itâs the kind of place that just makes you want to fall in love with it. Thereâs so much beauty and so much to appreciate. Each new stop also seems to involve learning something new about Wonwoo and somehow him trying his hand at Spanish again, only to fail. Youâre wondering if he does it just to entertain you.Â
While youâre seeing all the tourist spots, you take time to see the things the locals recommend as well. Sometimes thatâs hole-in-the-wall food places or stands that someone mentions. Other times itâs a park thatâs too out of the way for tourists. Even other times still, itâs a hidden access point to the beach. Thankfully, itâs still cool out and getting Wonwoo to agree to the beach isnât difficult. You idly wonder what it would be like to try and get him to visit the beach in January when itâs the dead of summer.Â
You want to try as many local dishes as you can while youâre there, too. Given his way, Wonwoo would probably eat in the hotel room just as much as out of it, but you donât know when youâre going to get this chance again. So, even though heâs worn out from spending so much time around people, he lets you drag him out again every night. He even seems to enjoy himself.
At the start of whatever this is, it was always you asking Wonwoo all the questions and trying to volunteer as little about yourself as possible. Youâre still an agent and youâre still supposed to be after him. The least you can do, while youâre totally ignoring your mission, is try to better understand Wonwoo and his motivations. Even if you donât end up turning him in, it's an invaluable experience to get to look into the mind of a criminal. When will you get another chance like this? When will you be this close to someone to ask personal questions? No part of you even considers that heâs lying to you. Youâre positive that he answers everything truthfully.
Somewhere along the line, it shifts. Maybe because you know everything you want to know about the man across from you. Or maybe because you genuinely feel comfortable about him. Either way, heâs the one thatâs asking you questions now. Surprisingly, though, he doesnât want to know anything about your work. He doesnât seem to care about any of that. Thereâs a nagging thought that thinks he might just be trying to make you comfortable. You try to quickly brush it away, though, and just answer any of the personal questions he asks. Wonwoo wants to know the simple things like where you grew up, what your family was like, and what you wanted to do when you were younger. The things that allow him to really know you. Itâs terrifying.Â
By the time you get back to the hotel that night, youâre exhausted. It feels like itâs been a never ending span of days in the best way. You collapse on the bed without changing. All you manage to do is take off your shoes. Wonwoo leans over you and kisses you, softly at first. But, like every other kiss with him, it leaves you gasping for air after a minute.
Itâs amazing how he seems to take your breath away and even more amazing how he always seems like heâs ready to tear your clothes off. Youâve never had someone like him in your life. But, that also brings you back to reality. Wonwoo asked you to give him a few days staying in his hotel room. Itâs definitely been longer than that without either of you seeming to notice. Thereâs a level of comfort that neither of you talk about given that this all has an expiration date. And that expiration date is rapidly approaching.Â
Staying with Wonwoo turns out to be longer than either of you planned and neither of you has a complaint about it. Youâve been checking in with Seungcheol every morning and Wonwoo pretends not to listen. Itâs been like living in a little bubble where reality isnât a concern.Â
Thatâs just the thing, though, isnât it? This isnât real life, not for you. This isnât something that lasts long term or that you can even sustain. The reality is still there. Wonwoo is one of the most infamous art thieves to ever live and you work for a secret agency tasked with bringing criminals like him to justice. Youâre not exactly sure what the last however many days have been. All you know is this is just a break from reality. A brief glimpse into an alternate life that can never be. Itâs been amazing and something you wonât ever forget. Youâre hoping that youâre both on the same page about that, at least.
âI should probably go back to my hotel today,â you say.Â
Wonwoo looks up from across the room where heâs reading while you pretend to work on your case. It helps to at least log in to the system. âTo get more stuff?â
âI canât stay here forever,â you point out.Â
âNo, I expect at some point weâll leave and head to the next place,â he agrees with a shrug.Â
âWe?â you ask, eyebrows flying up.Â
âYes, we,â he says like suddenly youâre slow on the uptake. âIâve got a few places in mind that Iâd love to take you, but itâs really up to you.âÂ
âWonwoo,â you start and your heart sinks.
You are definitely not on the same page. Probably not even in the same book, if youâre honest. Everything over the past days with him has been amazing. The perfect little escape from your reality. But, thatâs all itâs been: an escape. Or maybe thatâs all youâve let yourself think it was. Anything else seems like entirely too much. His face drops as he watches you.
âYouâre not coming with me,â he realizes.
âI didnât even know you would want me to!â you state, too loud for the space.
âHow could you not? Iâve been telling you all the places that I wanted you to see,â he says and that hits you harder than a physical blow. Heâs been giving you all the signs that this isnât just a bubble.
âI didnât think you were serious,â you point out.
âClearly,â he says, voice thick with disappointment.Â
âWonwoo, come on. Itâs not like I can just, what? Run away?â you say.
âOh, no, thereâs a whole life waiting for you back at your precious agency,â he says with derision.Â
âItâs all Iâve ever known,â you plead.
âAnd Iâve shown you that thereâs more to life than whatever this is for you,â he counters.
âI canât just leave them,â you say with a shake of your head.
That seems to make Wonwoo angrier than you expect. âNo, of course not. How silly of me. You have to get back to your handler that so clearly loves you.âÂ
âSeungcheol does not love me. Weâre friends, sure, but thatâs it,â you disagree.
âLetâs pretend thatâs true and itâs normal for a handler to speak to you the way he does. Or that itâs normal for him to worry so much about your safety. Who are you going back to apart from him? Whoâs waiting for you?â Wonwoo asks.
The questions wash over you like acid rain. Painful and harsh and unrelenting. The worst part is that heâs right. You have wondered if there are some feelings there from Seungcheol. You also donât have anyone waiting for you. Itâs really a half-life, if youâre being honest. Less than a half-life, probably. The past few days with Wonwoo are the most alive youâve felt since you were a child, before joining the agency.Â
âI canât justâŚthis is my job, Wonwoo. And youâre an art thief. A very famous one andâŚâ you start.
âHave I stolen anything here?â he asks and that brings you up short.
âWell, no, of course not. Youâve been with me,â you say simply.
âAnd I will leave this city without stealing. I will switch careers entirely if itâs that important, though it doesnât seem like it is since you havenât turned me in,â he says and itâs almost like heâs talking to himself. âIâve been all over the globe trying to feel something. Trying for anything. I started stealing because I could. I wanted to get the attention my parents never gave me. I kept going because I was looking for a challenge, which it is, at least sometimes. I was looking for someone, I think. Then, I find you and youâre everything I didnât know to ask for. But, youâre telling me some job where you canât even have a life is more important than this? That my job, which Iâm completely willing to give up, is too much of a barrier?â
âI have a life,â you scoff.
âReally?â Wonwoo challenges and folds his arms. âWhen was the last time you went on a real date? Not with a target, but a real date just with someone you wanted to know? Whenâs the last time you let yourself just breathe and explore a city? Whenâs the last time you did something just because you wanted to?â
âPlenty of people are married to their jobs,â you begin.
âI thought you were brave, you know,â Wonwoo muses. âI thought you were someone who would realize how rare this is. Itâs not like everyone is lucky enough to meet a person that completes them like this. I guess I was wrong. I guess all I was really good for was fucking you and thatâs all it was.â
âOf course thatâs not all it was,â you disagree. There are tears threatening to spill over. This isnât at all how you imagined it going. You werenât prepared for him to try to fight for you. âThe last few days with you have been everything I never thought Iâd experience. But, it hasnât been real, Wonwoo. It canât be real. Life doesnât work that way.âÂ
âWhy canât it?â he fires at you.
âBecause I donât deserve it!â you scream, tears finally streaming down your face. âBecause you donât know my scars. You donât know the things Iâve done. You donât know the mistakes Iâve made. You donât know that I have demons that are constantly chasing me.âÂ
âIâm a fucking criminal,â he points out. âWho am I to judge?â
âExactly,â you agree but rush to finish your thought before Wonwoo can interject. âYou donâtâŚquestion the decisions youâve made. You stand on everything youâve done. But, you also do so much good with charities and helping students and just giving back. Plus, Iâve looked at your crimes. You only ever stole from the rich to sell to other rich people.â
âYet you still were sent to chase me,â he points out.Â
âYeah, who do you think pays our salaries?â you ask flatly. âMy point is thatâŚI donât know. Iâm standing here across from you and I feel like Iâm the infinitely worse person in this situation.âÂ
âIt really canât be that bad,â he reasons.
âIâve taken lives, Wonwoo. More than I can count. And without even questioning if our reasoning was solid for taking them out. Iâve used my body in ways that I may never recover from, thinking it was my choice at the time. Iâve done what I was told and Iâve been good at it. Too good, maybe,â you say. Youâre talking to yourself more than him at this point. âIâm the one they send when they donât want a record. Iâm the one they send when nobody else can do it. Iâve spent the last 10 years of my life training and doing what I was told. Itâs given me scars that you canât see and wonât ever heal. All I know is this. Theyâre not just going to let me go. And even if they did, you donât deserve all the baggage that I come with. Youâre not a bad guy.â
âAnd you think you are? A bad guy?â he asks.
âI know I am,â you say.
âThatâs all you are if thatâs all you see, but I see so much more,â he argues.Â
âI still canât just ask them to walk away,â you press.
âI wasnât suggesting that you ask,â he says. âYou deserve a chance to start fresh. To see what you can be without the weight of the world hanging over your head.â
âI donât deserve anything more than what I have now,â you disagree.
âWhat about love? Do you deserve that?â he asks, changing directions.
âI donât know,â you admit.
âAnd me? Do I deserve love?â he asks.
âYes, without question,â you answer immediately.
âSo give me the chance to experience love,â he begs. âI never thought Iâd love anyone and Iâve never taken this kind of chance on anyone. But, Iâm asking you for a chance. Just one more.âÂ
Thereâs so much tension in the air between you. So many things still left unsaid and so much emotion. The air between you and him seems to crackle. A storm brews behind his eyes as he waits for you to answer him. It seems insane to think that he could feel that for you after such a short time. But, really, what do you know? You have unquestionably never been in love before, not really. Thereâs never been the time or space for it in your line of work. Relationships never seem to get deeper because youâre always keeping secrets. Canât ever tell them what you really do for work. And then thereâs Wonwoo. He knows so much about you already and even though itâs barely scratched the surface, itâs still more honest than youâve ever been. He doesnât want to run away and that scares you more than any mission youâve ever had.
Itâs justâŚitâs too much to decide now. You spend your whole life having to make split second decisions, yet canât about this. Donât have the data that you have on missions. Donât know the pros and cons. Itâs uncharted territory. Itâs scary in a way youâve never experienced. Youâve stared down the barrel of too many guns and this still feels infinitely more terrifying. Maybe he can love you after such a short amount of time because he seems to realize what youâre going to say before you say it.Â
âDonât,â he says softly when you open your mouth. âIâm going to leave the day after tomorrow. Iâm going to set the flight to leave at 1 in the afternoon. That gives you time to change your mind.â
âAnd if I donât reach you before then?â you ask softly.
âDonât ever expect to find me again,â he says with a finality that surprises you. When you meet his gaze, itâs harder than youâre expecting. âI really care about you and Iâd love you to come with me. But I know how stubborn you are. Itâs part of why I love you so much. So Iâm leaving my heart open until the day after tomorrow. Then itâs over.â
âYouâre an amazing person, Wonwoo,â you say and press a kiss to his cheek. âYouâve challenged a lot of my ideas about right and wrong. Iâll never forget that.âÂ
âIâm not accepting this as goodbye. Iâll still hope to see you before I leave,â he says and presses the gentlest kiss to your forehead.Â
Your throat is too tight to say anything in response to that. All you can do is gather up your things and head out of the hotel room. Everything in your body feels tired from the unexpected heaviness of the conversation. It hurts to see Wonwoo looking so hurt. As crazy as it sounds, you do mean that he deserves the absolute best. You also meant it that made you rethink a lot of your preconceived notions. You actually questioned things for the first time in your adult life. Despite all of that, you still walk right out of the hotel room.
You spend nearly every minute after walking out of Wonwooâs hotel room considering his offer. Go as far as scheduling your flight out of Buenos Aires for the same time as his. Genuinely, youâre not sure what you want to do. At least Seungcheol understood failing the mission. Somehow, he still sees it as a win that nothing was stolen from anywhere in the city while you were there. He assumes that your presence somehow spooked the notorious art thief. Thankfully he doesnât realize just how right he is.Â
The biggest surprise is that Chan, the slightly overeager agent from the flight down, will be meeting you when you get on the plane. Heâs only wrapping up a second mission that popped up in the area. The Agency is sending him along so that you can debrief about your actual mission and start looping him in going forward. Apparently, as great as you are and as (almost) perfect as your record is, the agency still wants to have someone for you to work with when you need them. Since that canât be Seungcheol, heâs recommending a promising younger agent. This apparently also includes you being the one to tell him all of this yourself.Â
The airport is busy when you get there, an unsurprising side effect of planning flights during the afternoon. Thereâs also the fact that private planes have to leave from the international airport, which is always somewhat packed. Getting through customs and security is surprisingly smooth and soon youâre going to have to face your literal crossroads.Â
In one direction is the familiar. Nothing about working for The Agency is easy. Thereâs a sense of routine to it, though. A sense of generally knowing what your days or weeks or even months will look like. You know how to make coffee in the shitty break room when youâre actually on site (a rarity). You know how to play nice with the other agents. You know how all the tech works. And youâre good at the missions themselves. Thatâs just to say you donât have to learn anything new. Youâre lucky enough to have a semi-boss that you get along with. Thereâs a sense of routine to everything from mission briefings to flights to the missions themselves. Thereâs comfort in knowing you donât really have to make the decisions. Sure, you have to figure out which course to take on the ground with a mission. But, that usually only means picking option A or B. All of the possible courses of action come in the briefing. You just have to evaluate the factors and figure out which pre-determined option fits best. Itâs easy. As fucked up as it might be to admit, you like doing something that you know youâre good at. Itâs nice to get praised for constantly succeeding. Itâs the easy decision.
And in the other directionâŚwell, itâs the unknown. Being with Wonwoo has been nothing short of the best feeling of your life. The most alive youâve ever felt. Itâs kind of crazy but part of you thinks you may love him. Can see how the whole future plays out, even if itâs not crystal clear. The two of you could start over somewhere new where he doesnât have to steal art and you donât have to chase criminals with questionable methods. Both of you have the funds (even if heâs better set up) to start over. Both of you clearly have the skills to disappear into the wind, too. Itâs not like your legal name exists anywhere anymore. Very few people even know it, not that you would go back to it.Â
Itâs easy to get lost in the daydream. As much as you love the sun of Buenos Aires, you canât imagine Wonwoo in a place like that during the actual summer. Everything about him makes you think of somewhere cooler, somewhere that youâre not constantly sweating. That would let you take breaks to sunnier weather. Places where you could soak up the sun while he took refuge under an umbrella, watching you with all the affection in the world. Actually, you can picture visiting a lot of places with him. He would be the perfect travel partner to see all the beautiful corners of the world that youâve never been able to appreciate. Itâs like going somewhere for a business trip. Youâre there working, not to appreciate everything around you.Â
Thereâs something kind of poetic about being at an airport as an actual crossroads in your life. Itâs like you can get on a plane going anywhere. Quite literally, since youâre not sure where Wonwooâs plane is going. Not that it really matters. If thatâs the path you pick, then itâs for him rather than the destination.Â
The only question left is whether youâre ready to leave your entire life behind. Are you ready to say goodbye to the agency that saved you? Are you ready to cut yourself off from the few people who actually know you and accept you as you are? Can you live without having any closure on that part of your life? Would you feel guilty that Seungcheol would be left with a million questions about what happened to you? Or would it hurt you to know that he would blame himself for your disappearance somehow? Then again, maybe he would know, on some level, that you just finally reached the point of needing to walk away. Thatâs something you and him have talked about before, in the early hours of the morning after too much to drink. What would you do if you could walk away from this life? What would life after The Agency look like?Â
With a deep breath, you pick your path and you donât look back. Thatâs the only way you know youâll have the strength in your decision.Â
i hope you all enjoyed this as much as i enjoyed writing it! please reblog or comment and let me know đ
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